#a profound fucking pattern of busting balls to meet people on their own terms but never seeing that happen to me
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Now you're gone, cut off, alone
#ne seri#when will it be on my own terms#i got icecream cuz i wanted icecream but then it had beef gelatin so naturally i got drunk about it#and i love the stuff that floats to the surface#a profound fucking pattern of busting balls to meet people on their own terms but never seeing that happen to me#idk if its really because im a convenience woman or because im spiritually unable to perceive it when it comes my way#i just dont wanna feel so profoundly lonely but feeling used and deeply inconvenienced every time someone tries to get my company#and i cant get rid of the love i can just cover it up with rage and cold silence because i know you didn't care and never will#my rage is terrifying and my fire is too much and im just wired wrong wrong wrong#ill move mountains and act like its fine until i find out you wont do the same cause i taught you not to even think about it#and then nothing in the world can make me act like i care again again again again#why should i care when you never did#not in a way i needed you to when i needed someone to care#i have a whole bottle of rum im gonna start working my way down#yeah how fucking dare i have whatever neurochemical spice thats made everyone sniff me out for the less than human thing i am
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