#a post dedicated to the greys too tbh <3

[sunkissedlouis]

“you are the god of this festival because football wasn’t available anywhere but you sorted it out...how did you do that?“

[murfeelee]

Picrew - Cupcakes

I absolutely HAD to try this cupcake maker https://picrew.me/image_maker/1435883 ; it’s utterly adorable!

Sakura & Ryuu

(Shadowhunters) Alec & Magnus Lightwood-Bane

(MDZS / The Untamed) Wei WuXian & Lan WangJi

(Spartacus) Agron & Nasir

(The Witcher 3) Geralt of Rivia & Yennefer von Vengerberg

MY THOUGHTS / FANGIRLING

My Japanese cherry-tree faery avatar sim Sakura is an explosion of pink. I imagine her cupcake tastes like straight up sugar. It’s got candy sprinkles, jelly filling, cherry syrup, one of those edible icing flower cake-topper things, and is topped off with a giant maraschino cherry. Wrap it up with a cute obi bow and viola--diabetes on a plate.

Sakura’s beau Ryuu is an albino serpentine shadow dragon, so his cupcake is shaped like a giant horned and winged snake. I shudder to think why his cupcake is grey--I would NOT want to eat that thing. Highly likely it’s poisoned.

Alec Lightwood-Bane has a blueberry cupcake, in honor of Malec’s warlock son Max (aka “Blueberry”). As the current Consul of the Clave over all the Shadowhunters, Alec’s a busy nephilim in Idris, and reads his correspondences while he eats.

Magnus Lightwood-Bane is fabulous, and his cupcake is too. I actually have no idea what it is. But it’s MAGIC! So not only is it delicious, but it likely also gets rid of wrinkles and unwanted body hair, and files your taxes for you.

Wei WuXian’s cupcake embodies what it means to be the infamous Mo Dao Zu Shi (Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation). It’s got the death’s head skull icing, and a crescent moon of dark chocolate. Red velvet and chocolate cake swirl about like the blood-soaked dead soil of WWX’s base in the Burial Mounds, and the battlefields where the Yiling Laozu reanimated hordes of feral corpses to defeat his foes. The coffin-like cupcake wrapper holds resentful energy back, so that WWX can rest in peace during his 13-year long food coma. WWX’s favorite red hair ribbon is characteristically untidy, but there’s a touch of elegance to the black and red dish, decorated in his iconic colors.

TBH Lan WangJi’s “cupcake” is actually a snowcone, cuz eff the rules! I imagined it as one of those palette-cleansing treats fancy people eat between courses, like Mia Thermopolis in Princess Diaries (garnishes and all, LOL). It’s got a snow bunny mint candy on top, because of course it does, and is decorated with the ubiquitous GusuLan headband ribbon.

Agron has a whole social media account dedicated to posting his meal plans, so he sticks to his fitness regiments. But on Cheat Days he goes all out, piling on the carbs and fats with chocolatey cookie cupcake goodness. He’ll burn it all off with Nasir later. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Banana nut muffins and bread and cupcakes are some of my favorite snacks ever, so someone was gonna have to have one. Nasir, as usual, pulled the short stick, LOLOLOLOL.

I saw the swords decal and was like who the heck would have a frikkin weapon on their cupcake? Then it hit me--Geralt would. XD I dub this cupcake The White Wolf: it’s a chocolate cake topped with confectionery sugar like the snows over Kaer Morhen, and white icing like Geralt’s hair. The black wrapper is reminiscent of the leather armor of the Wolf School, and of course there’s 2 swords--steel for humans and silver for monsters. There’s a fork stabbing through the cupcake like the pitchfork the mob of peasants used to try and kill Geralt before he lost his memory. :P

Last but certainly not least is Yennefer’s cupcake, in an actual frikkin cup, because she’s a snob. XD True to form, her cake is dressed in black and white -- vanilla cake with chocolate swirls--a perfect compliment and polar opposite to Geralt’s tastes. And of course there’s a lilac flower, and gooseberry toppings, as per her signature perfume. Black raven/crow feathers from her Familiar add that final touch for the greatest sorceress this side of Nilfgaard.

__________________________________________

Thanks for reading!

[meruz]

Aforementioned long ask post please excuse me while i try to figure out tumblr's new text editor. I’ll get into the art meme questions first and then the rest at the end.

Ok first of all thank you all for sending in questions! Giving me an excuse to talk hehe. I’ll address these in number order. Here’s a link to the ask meme for reference but also I’ll restate the question for ease of reading.

1. When did you get into art?

Super cliche answer but I don’t remember a time where I WASN’T the weird art kid! I started keeping a dedicated sketchbook when I was about 12? But here’s a page from my kindergarten journal about what I want to be when I grow up.

2. What art-related sites have you ever signed up for? 

LOL this is a weird question. Not sure why so many people want to know. Anyways I definitely had a dA. more than one dA account. I used to browse oekakis when I was a kid but I think I was only signed up to some small ones that internet friends owned. What else...? Mangabullet,Tegakie, Paintberri, iscribble back when that was a thing, instagram if that COUNTs, I used to post art on livejournal and dreamwidth too. Patreon, I guess. Gumroad, inprnt, bigcartel, storenvy all for selling stuff.

In terms of resources.. I have a schoolism account that I’m sharing with friends. Used to take classes on coursera for free. I signed up to textures.com for work recently haha. I can’t remember if I ever had an account on posemaniacs. Did they have accounts...? I definitely used to visit all the time.

3. Show us your oldest piece of art you have on hand.

Alright here’s me actually logging into my old deviantart account. These are from September 2008 So I was 13 years old. I don’t have a deviantart account from before then because 13 was the required age for having an account and I didn’t want to lie about my age because I wanted people to be impressed by how young yet clearly incredible at art I was LOL.

4. What defines your artistic style?

You guys are probably more equipped to answer this than me but uh... I wanna say... Focus on colors. And... a slightly heavy hand? Like confident... not always well-considered mark making HAH...

Also I think I have a pretty healthy mix of american comics/manga influences. I feel like people who are into american comics always think my art is too manga and people who are into anime/manga always think my art is too american. And I’m taking that as a good sign.

5. Do you practice other styles/have you tried other styles in the past?

I like to think I switch it up a bunch! I mean, these are pretty different, right?

I think I’ve mentioned this before but one thing I really took away from art school is that, for an illustrator at least, art style shouldn’t be consistent. Your greatest weapon is changing the aspects of your style based on the task, the emotions and message you want to illustrate etc. So depending on the project I’m working on, the fandom I’m drawing for, whether I want something to be funny or serious or dramatic, I’ll change things about my style all the time.

One thing I don’t rly post on here is really tight polished work and that’s because I do that for my day job haha. If you’re not paying me... I’m probably not gonna color in the lines.

6. What levels of artistic education have you had?

I have a whole ass diploma LOL. Bachelor of Fine Arts in Illustration. from the Rhode Island School of Design. And I had a great college experience tbh. Besides the student loans. If any of you guys are thinking about art school feel free to e-mail or message me questions or concerns, I’ll be happy to help. Be as honest as I can be.

7. Show us at least one picture you drew or sketched recently that you did not put on a public site.

heres the wandavision kids. Uhh what else do I have...I feel like I’m rummaging for loose change here...

assorted valentines prep doodles

8. What is your favourite piece that you have done?

Well, obviously this is gonna change all the time and generally it’s gonna be my most recent piece LOL. So yeah, why the hell not. I’ll say it’s this one. I have a pretty short memory which I count as a blessing for an artist. I don’t dwell that long on older work and it keeps me moving forward.

10. What do you like most about your art?

I like that it’s something that only I would make! I had this thought fairly recently and I wrote it down in my sketchbook, it’s pretty cheesy and rambling but it felt revolutionary at the time:

So yeah. I like my art best when it’s the most me and for me. And I like it least when it feels like I’m just making something for social media or for other people’s expectations or whatever.

14. What do you like drawing the most?

Kids in baggy clothing are like my go-to LOL idk if that’s obvious. but also I like being challenged so lately I’ve really loved drawing multi-character compositions, environments, weird angles, etc.

oh i LOVE drawing the underside of shoes lol. And bandages. People that are kinda beat up.. I think it comes from getting a bunch of cuts all the time. I’m always patching myself up and I want to patch characters up too.

15. What do you like drawing the least?

mmm I try to find something to like in every drawing but lets see... I don’t like doing commissions of people’s dogs. Just because it’s normally like... a family friend and my mom volunteered me without my consent and I don’t even really know what they’re expecting me to draw and I don’t even get to meet the dog. Also I’m not that great at dog anatomy. Trying to learn though.

18. What is your purpose for drawing?

This could have a million answers! Uhhh to GIT GOOD??? But also to express myself... and also to make money... I mean it depends on what the drawing IS. I draw fanart mostly to connect to people in the fandom so if you ever see me drawing fanart please take it as like an open invitation to talk to me about the character haha. 

20. How would you rank your art? (poor, mediocre, good, etc.)

Good!!! I have a lot of self-confidence primarily born out of ignorance and a short attention span. If I don’t think too hard about how many other artists are mindblowingly unfathombly good... its easy to think I’m good too! LOL

In all seriousness though, I think the opinion a person has of their art is like a crazy balancing act, right? Like you have to think you suck enough to want to get better but also you have to think you’re good enough to not want to give up. I think we’re all walking that line, I know I am! But also I’m a glass half-full type of person so. Most of the time I feel good about it.

22. List at least one of your “artspirations.”

This is a good question because I’ve been trying and failing to put together one of those “influence map” memes for like a full month now. What’s giving me a hard time is I feel like none of these are actually really obvious “““influences”““ in my art? Like it’s hard to see a lot of them in the work I make...? But idk maybe you guys’ll see what I can’t.

And these are just a couple! God there’s so many more. I could talk about other artists for ages, from all different genres of art. Daumier, Rockwell like every illustrator out there, Dana Gibson, Alex Toth, Hiroshi Yoshida, a lot of the Brandywine School. Lots of current working artists too, Karl Kerschl, frikkin Masashi Kishimoto lol, Jake Wyatt, Richie Pope, Edouard Caplain, Matt Cook, Sachin Teng, - lots of big internet artists, Sophie Li, Freddy Carrasco, Milliofish, Angela Sung... like all my friends from art school too. I could just keep going but I’ll stop for now lol.

24. Do you have a shameful art past? (recolour sprite comics, tracing art, etc.)

I mean if that’s how we’re defining shameful?? sure LOL. It’s not sprite comics but I used to do pokemon sprite recolors all the time. And I used to trace manga panels and color them... Granted this was all when I was like under 12 yrs old so it’s not even embarrassing. Can you really call it shameful when a 7 year old wets the bed or whatever? Not really. In fact some of these are cool as fuck. Look

25. Draw a picture!

Man I’m so tired now but here.

I used to get a lot of compliments for drawing people smiling lol but I don’t think I’ve drawn a lot of smiling lately.. here’s proof I’ve still got it.

OK MEME DONE. onto the rest.

I read this ask first thing when i opened my computer in the morning and it made me really emotional.. I’m so glad my sketches could help you!!

I think a lot of artists on social media talk about the struggle of making art but imo not enough people talk about the joy! Like I know it’s corny but. I really meant what I said at the beginning of that sketchbook about re-contextualizing art around process and progress > product and perfection. I think its super important..! The strength of messy, unfinished, and energetic art! For the feeling of it, for the love it!

That's crazy!!! I hope you like 'em. The whole line of x-books is really good rn imo.

Hi! I totally have the answer for digital stuff on my faq lol. But in terms of drawing on paper.. it varies! I tend to use sketchbooking and any on-paper doodling I do as a way to loosen up/warm-up or experiment. But right now my go-to aresenal is:

from top > bottom

- kuretake no.55 doublesided brush pen

- tombow fudenosuke

- muji 0.38 ballpoint

- medium size poscas

- grey tombow double brush pens

- good ol bic mechanical pencil

not EXACTly sure which inking you referring to from my sketchbook but if I had to take a guess it'd probably be the kuretake no55. That's been my main inker, lately. Great for sketching with the thin end too.

You can print out and eat my art if you like. Just please don't mass produce or re-sell. <3

Thanks! I've come to accept that my art is always gonna be sort of gestural and painty naturally. It's getting it to tighten up enough to be legible that's hard lol...

uh yeah lol I agree actually. I think yolei is great.

I assume these asks are related? LOL

1) Yeah totally true. I love David.

2) I don’t take requests, sorry! But if you want to commission me to draw Legion i would be MORE than happy to. Just e-mail me at isellhotdogs@gmail.com.

<33333333333333333333333333

[lady-plantagenet]

What are your top ten novels about the Wars of the Roses? And why?

I think it’s obvious by the length how enthusiastic I was to answer this ask xx thank you for asking me and giving me also an opportunity to make a masterlist of some sorts of all my reviews xx. But you know? I speak like quite the expert but in reality I’ve read very little histfic about TWOTR because I just newly got back into this hobby (about a year ago) and have little time in general so tbh the last three books on this list I do not personally care for but since I’ve read so little novels of this kind they are here nonetheless hhh (so please people, give me no angry asks asking me why I am endorsing PG, I’m not).

1. The Last of the Barons by Lord Edward Lytton-Bulwer

This is quite possibly the best book I’ve ever read in my life. The gap between these books and the rest is a chasm the size of the world and I wpuld genuinely reccomend this book as an actual piece of literature to anyone, not just TWOTR fanatics. It is written in 1840, in quite old timey lingo and it centres around Richard Neville 16th Earl of Warwick, but in the true tradition of a real classic it is more than just a character drama, it astutely showcases the purpose of Warwick and what he did in the context of his wider world and doesn’t just chalk it up to personal greed. There is also this fascinating subplot about courtship, science and such. Hell, you even get this eccentric ‘natural philosopher’ guy called Adam Warner who tries to make something like a steam engine and gets employed as an alchemist by Jacquetta and Edward IV.

From a historical standpoint it is quite biased as the author himself was a politician (and an actual baron) and tbh I don’t completely agree with his interpretation of history and I can see some of the Victorian inluences slip in, but some of his takes are very refreshing and he clearly consulted the primary sources. I am much interested in his philosophy and life outlook though and while I don’t think his Warwick is the Warwick, I think he (Lytton-Bulwer) understood him like no other novelist could. As for the writing style... here’s an excerpt of a good reads review that I agree with and tells you all you need to know:

“Of course, such a style of writing no longer exists. The language used is essentially foreign to us. But the nobility, the pride of this story work their ways into your bones, your heart. You will yearn for honor once you have left it.“

Basically, go type it into google and see what I mean. You don’t even need to purchase this book it’s all online at the first click on Gutenberg.

Nevertheless, I’ve posted excerpts of it here, here and here =)

2. The King’s Grey Mare by Rosemary Hawley Jarman

This book (unlike the latter) has zero actual historical value. Actually, it sort of does in the way that it hilights certain real events that most people are unaware of when it comes to its protagonist: Elizabeth Woodville, eg the whole Cooke tapestry affair and the whole Desmond affair. Both things which I still stand on the fence about (if you don’t know what I’m talking about send em another ask or pm me). But like, it isn’t political, philosophical or such in any way like the first book, yet you still feel like you are *there* in the 15th century - by the time I finished reading it my heart was wrung dry and I kind of fell into a down for a couple of days because I just wanted to feel the magic again. If anyone would ask me I would give this 5 stars because it perfectly achieved what it set out to do (I can’t expect all books to go above and beyond like #1), it made me feel for the characters who were super complex, was accurate historically and even when it wasn’t it made sense, it got very creative with its themes (which I like to see because I am not interested in reading the exact same story over and over again) and the prose was absolutely magical and brought all the depth to this novel. I’ve read classics with less flowing and poignant prose, yes actual classics!

This book also switches POVs quite a lot (basically it headhops because it’s written in omniscient- but whatever, rules are meant to be broken), so you’ll get to see many of your faves in there, Edward IV, Margaret of Anjou and Grace Plantagenet feature quite heavily. One thing that disappointed me is that it wasn’t really Edward IV/Elizabeth Woodville (at the time I bought it for that), she never really likes him and his love for her kind of wanes towards the end. If you’re not too bothered about that then I say go buy it.

3. The Daisy and the Bear by K L Clark

I put this here because we are already going into shakier territory when it comes to this list. This is kind of the last *really* good, truly five star one. It is a long spoof about TWOTR but god it’s smart! Yet, It does not take itself seriously and has Margaret of Anjou/Warwick the Kingmaker as a crackship and centrepiece and had me in stitches the whole time. I’ve written a long detailed review for it here.

4. Death be Pardoner to Me by Dorothy Davies

This is a novel about George Duke of Clarence. Quite possibly the only novel ever written about him in existence and boy is it a trip - the author claims to have channelled him (she’s a medium). I’ve written a detailed review for it here. I read this last spring and my views have unfortunately changed, the thing is, I’ve come to find out through my research that this was quite possibly a hoax as there are some indisputable inaccuracies (Ankarette Twynyho’s age, the details of Isabel’s death - we *know* she did not die from childbirth, Isabel did not reunite with him after Tewksbury 1471, but right before Christmas 1470). It’s also quite Richardian (the author admitted) and she could have *had* me had she not chose to divulge it in the foreword. Nevertheless, I still like this book because it did get to me at certain points and it’s good quality as a novel, I remember shedding a tear at one point even which is extremely rare for me but I think that says more about my sentiment for the subject matter than the book itself.

5. We Speak no Treason by Rosemary Hawley Jarman (not yet finished, so ranking may vary)

I haven’t finished it yet, so I’ll leave it here for now. This book is a Richardian book about Richard III, but I can’t get enough of this author, I haven’t found anyone to replace her with. The prose is magnificent as usual and I must confess that I’m happy that this book is told through the POVs of three OCs and not Richard, he remains rather elusive and tbf I find the three OCs very interesting and at this point I’m more interested in their stories than anything else. Of course, Richard III is still a fairly prominent part of this novel (even when he doesn’t appear) and it has led to me getting annoyed quite a bit. Given who I am I fumed massively at that one aside that Clarence and Edward have bastards whereas Richard isn’t like that... like are you serious?? At one point the author reassociated the Games and Playes Chesse book to Richard when it was in reality dedicated to Clarence and I got even more annoyed. Leave the poor figure something ma’am? Whatever, as a book about three medieval commoners it’s fantastic and that’s what I pretend it is.

6. Wife to the Kingmaker by Sandra Wilson

Nothing more to add than what I wrote in my (super-long) detailed review on here. This is the case because I read it very recently. This is a novel about Anne Beauchamp 16th Countess of Warwick, it’s ranked higher than Sunne because though it’s less accurate it’s got panache.

7. The Sunne in Splendour by Sharon K Penman

I feel very strongly about this Richard III book and what it represents. I wrote a long detailed review about it on here and a follow-up post on the discussion is here ft my awesome mutual @beardofkamenev ‘s insights also thrown into the mix. Xx

8. The White Queen by Philippa Gregory

This is a step higher than the other two because this book pretty much changed my life. The thing is, I read it translated into my own language by an extremely talented translator and I was also only about 11/12 years old so it was all very impressive to me then. This book about Elizabeth Woodville effectively introduced me to the TWOTR; an interest that has never really left me these past ten years (though at one point (ages 14-19) it was quite wane). It’s not a good book by any standard (I was quite shocked when picking it up at a bookstore, I had found that when read in the original language it lost all its magic), but I owe a lot to it and some people who now endlessly discourse about how bad PG is need to recognise their debt of gratitude and be a bit more respectful, I think. That is of course unless you came into this era via different media, but you got to admit that a massive part of us got to this place through TWQ, though we outgrew it.

10. The Red Queen and The Kingmaker’s Daughter by Philippa Gregory

Exact same commentary as above, just objectively not good books. Flat characterisation, misunderstanding of the era, historical innacuracies which don’t add anything, lack of nuance in prose which often dances too close to *gasp* YA prose *shudders*. But these are lower because I don’t owe them a debt of gratitude as I do TWQ. Funnily enough, they are still better than the series.

[falsegoodnight]

what're you working on right now???

okay i don’t think anyone needs a really long answer to this but what can i say, i love talking about my own wips (the current count of them are 35 on the main list and 8 on the second list YES I’M CRAZY I KNOW). 

i’m actually working on multiple things right now but the main ones are:

✰ a sequel to my love’s not simple (it’s fragile), aka my first abo! it’s not going to be super long, maybe around 15k? but i’ve missed this world so it’s fun to get back into it! this is set to come out by the end of the month as a birthday present for a dear friend of mine (YES, all three fics this month have been dedicated to someone else - there’s too many birthdays in this month geez). it’s at 3k right now, so a fifth of the way through!!

✰ my october fic! idk how many people are going to see this but i’ve decided that my destruction fic (see wip page for more info) is what i’ll be trying to finish for the ninth! it’s exes to lovers, slow burn, a bit angsty, and also involves superpowers!! it’s also different from my usual type of fic in that the romantic aspects will be more subdued in favor of focusing on plot and development but it’s still a ris fic, you know? also, journalist harry <333 this is only at 3k and i really need to get on that haha. 

✰ my blffs! i have two prompts: 

347: Harry and Louis dated but Louis obviously did something to piss off the universe because years later, Harry ends up being the wedding planner for Louis’ marriage that anyone can clearly see he doesn’t want. Harry starts planning Louis’ wedding based off of how Harry used to describe to Louis what he imagined their wedding to be like. (I’m also making it mpreg so it’s basically a shotgun wedding <3) 

currently at: 23k out of an estimated 52k

63: Friends to lovers AU where Harry and Louis are best friends and flatmates in Uni and they both need money, Harry for his gym membership and Louis for cute stuff like sanrio plushies, so they decide to film homemade porn videos together. Louis is shy and sweet and maybe inexperienced and Harry kinda doms him.

currently at: 5k out of an estimated 28k 

i really need to get on those too haha. but after october 9th, they’ll be by main priority!

the rest are more on the side and less of priorities! 

✰ pack au - more information here but the basic info is that it’s an abo pack au where harry is the heir to the pack (future pack alpha) and he’s betrothed to louis (future pack luna) and they’re not supposed to interact until they come of age... and yet... lots of yearning and breaking the rules and letters and soft stuff <33 and COURTING <3

i haven’t been working on it for a bit because of other fics but t’s at 7k out of an estimated 50k. this is my comfort fic and i mostly pull it out to cheer me up when i’m sad/stressed. 

✰ nurse louis au - so i’ve had this idea for a few months but i’ve been watching grey’s anatomy for the first time with my sisters and it inspired me to spontaneously do a curious cat word prompt for this story and, well, i got hooked. i’ve done two mini snippets for it on twitter, one of which you can find here. this was originally really low on my priority list but i’m moving it up because i’m excited about it! (it’s also not even on my tumblr wip list yet because i am terrible at keeping up with that!)

it’s only about 1.2k out of an estimated 35-40k! 

✰ something else with @soldouthaz ;) - no more info on that <3

✰ other drabbles - i have a ridiculously ambitious list of drabbles i want to write including two for the swan lake au, another one for sleeping on our problems (the first one i did was literally posted today and you can find it here), and a couple for the peach universe which will be posted on clicktosubmit. i haven’t touched any of those in a little bit but hopefully, i’ll get at least a few done by the end of the year. 

again, this answer was probably really unnecessarily long but if anything i can just use this as a point of reference especially when things get hectic. i have two fics i definitely want to get out in the next few weeks and then i’ll probably take a break from posting in order to focus on my blffs. there’ll probably be a november fic but who knows how busy with classes i’ll be then (i don’t even want to think about it tbh--)

but, anyways, sorry it’s so long! :)

[thedappleddragon]

today was fine if not just a bit off. I woke up at noon for the first time in weeks because I accidentally stayed up til 4 am. I fed my cat, took a very relaxing shower (btw I know people sometimes read this and I feel like I should mention that I shower more often than just when I mention it in these posts. ive been thinking about that for weeks), did laundry, and drew ponies in my backyard. I only did about 3 pages of drawings in my sketchbook, but there were lots of characters on each page, and I like all the drawings :) and I shared them with sammie and she friggin loves the mlp designs!! ex bronie gang I guess. I’m having a ton of fun this is au of an au, and next I want to figure out what our ~elements of royalty~ would be. I did some research and found some concepts that could work, but tbh I think the best way to assign them would first require figuring out how our princesses rule their own kingdoms, how they would win the competition of new supreme ruler, and what would be their downfall. I'll probably dedicate more brain power to this tomorrow and maybe brainstorm with the group. BUT the most interesting part of today was going to my dad’s work to possibly get a PART TIME JOB! I printed out a reference sheet and filled out an application and headed over there with my dad and followed him around while he did his job and waited for the manager to have a free minute. they were really busy tho so I just sat near the paint swatches until he could scan through my papers and ask me to call him tomorrow. I drove home and hung out for an hour until 8 when my dad was supposed to get off work. I took his car home because the red one wasn't working and my sister took the nice grey one and my dad needed me to drive him home. I ended up sitting in the parking lot watching tiktoks for 45 minutes until my phone died waiting for him lol. he joked around imitating my brother and I from when we were in marching band and practice ended early and we were hungry and tired. I had helped mom make chicken earlier when she was feeling sad about not being able to walk or do anything and just wanting to eat, but I already ate that earlier and instead of eating it again, I made chicken and broccoli and added leftover pasta and Alfredo sauce and ate that instead. it was pretty good but I added too much pepper. 9/10 I'd make it again. then I got full and laid down with my cat, cuddling her and playing harvest moon. now its like 12;30 and I can hear mice chewing on construction paper but I'm going to choose to believe its rain outside because otherwise im going to be too mad to sleep

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issues 4&5

its delphi time babey

I'm sorry but drift & co look like such fuckin nerds on their scooter things on the cover lmaooo

oh god. seeing the first page just reminded me of how horribly confused i was for this whole little arc the first time i read it. i was like ok, who are all these new characters, and also why does everyone look so similar

anyways now i now what's going on. i love first aid

love the running continuity of rung being the literal only psychologist on cybertron (except for fr*id but that's later). no wonder everyone's fucked up they all have to share a single therapist 

ok i find it extremely funny that first aid was demoted from doctor to nurse, as if that's a thing that happens EVER - I mean it'd be one thing if first aid was a nurse practitioner (which i doubt is a position that exists here), at least that demotion would make sense, but like...the doctors i work with don't know how to do most nurse stuff (like BP, cathing, vaccinations, hell even using some of the thermometers - that's all stuff nurses/etc do), so demoting one to a nurse would be a disaster (just like promoting a really good nurse to a doctor would be a bad idea). anyways i know I'm being pedantic but it Be like that when you work in the medical field and read something that has medicine-related stuff in it

i love swerve giving ratchet the tiniest free drink ever lmaooo

is that skids being a rowdy drunk in the bg lmaoooo

unironically i love medical statistics. keep it comin

i love magnus’s giant sternal chestpiece thing. its like a bird’s sternum but without the massive pec muscles attached 

i love magnus and rodimus’s dynamic so much

oh pipes....im so sorry but this fun space adventure is going to be not so much fun for you

ratchets ideologies are certainly interesting, and i liked seeing how they changed over the course of the story

drift: why would i be SCARED of the DJD, I've got a SWORD, two swords even,

hvbhajkhfbsdjkf pipes really said ‘oi, you two - what's this, then?’ that's the most british fucking thing, that's literally something i say when I'm doing an overexaggerated british accent, oh my god,

PIPES IS SUCH A TINY DUMBASS. ILY SIR BUT WHAT ARE YOU DOING

aaaand now you're covered in dead bodies, pipes. look at your life, look at your choices

drift epic sword moments

drift confirmed for the kinda weird guy who has katanas that he uses to like, cut up fruit and water bottles in his backyard while rodimus films him

‘i thought i heard...bickering’ lmaooooo

ah, so its covid

this arc is how i feel working in healthcare lmaooo especially now that i probably have covid 

so rewind condensed the entire war into an 11 second long cringe compilation. nice

seeing the mechanical stuff past tailgate’s visor is so cool

poor tailgate, this guy is getting slammed with history from multiple sides. and like, bias is inevitable in ANY sort of recounting of events, especially controversial historical events, so poor tg just kinda has to take it all in and decide who to listen to 

that’s...not really how immunity works, guys. also, you shouldn't be exposed to so much disease with proper ppe usage

is there even such thing as ppe in the transformers universe?? there are fluid- and contact-transmitted illnesses, so there SHOULD be

is there even OSHA in this universe??????? unbelievable 

first aid, holding a giant fucking claw clamp: we haven't tried EVERYTHING............

first aid read a human wikihow article on how to jumpstart a car and took notes 

i love tailgate’s ‘mom says its my turn on the xbox’ pose 

tailgate has a point - he’s from pre-war times, where things weren't as grey so of course he would try to divide the two sides into ‘good guys’ and ‘bad guys’

CYCLONUS BE NICE DONT HIT UR FUTURE HUSBAND

go get some character development and then maybe you'll feel better

seeing the word quarantine is making me twitchy w/my possible month-long complete isolation quarantine on the horizon

drift pulling his swords on pipes and ratchet pushing down drift’s arms...lmao

poor pipes...even tho this is completely his fault, its still rough

also jesus, pharma and ratchet look so goddamn similar, reading this was so confusing the first time around 

drifts idea of subduing pipes involves turning into a cool car and also posing with his sword

also. never gonna be over drift’s massive thighs. jesus man

ooof now drift has the rona. ouch 

poor drift, his covid realization is getting overshadowed by pharma being flung around

first aid bustin thru w/the epic medical nipple clamps and some Big Boi Backup

ok that's an epic pre-beatdown speech from fort max right there, daym 

im just gonna continue on w/issue 5 now for continuity’s sake. yay!

the cover of tailgate in magnus’s autobot school is so cute

and we open with an incredible shot of fort max str8 up ripping a guy in half. i mean, to be fair, he DID just give an epic speech about how much he was gonna do that, and he certainly followed thru

yeahhhhh, fort max is not doing so well atm

when he puts that dudes head in his chest vent thing and then snaps it shut....man 

also i fucking LOVE when their faces are shaded all in black w/only the eyes/mouth fully drawn...fantastic stuff

ratchet: phew i am not equipped to deal w/this level of Fucked Up Mental Trauma. u good m8?

ratchet is already writing up a referral to rung for fort max as this is happening

drift is just laying on the ground dying like, oh hey yeahh I'm still here too 

i fucking love when punctuation is drawn in story - like here where first aid has a little ? over his head....fav

ratchet holding drifts hand ;_; 

ok tbh ambulon having switched sides 10 yrs ago is wild bc like, 10 years is barely any time for these guys, especially in a war that lasted 4 million years. that would be like a human switching sides in a war like, 3 months before it ends. probably. i sense some math bs, I'm just extrapolating here

all that mexican standoff shit is going down and first aid is just like But That's None Of My Business

ah so ambulon is an asymptomatic carrier 

and there's first aid with the save! iconic

pharma calling ratchet ‘buddy’ hbvakjdsbfhkasdf

ooooh i love that they figured it out - and i love that twist, that transforming is what triggers the start of symptoms. remember when drift turned into a cool car? yep

s/o to Ambulon Transformers for helping me in my medical terminology courses, bc now ill always remember: Leg(tm)

also this explanation makes a ton more sense (in universe, at least) than the whole ‘i guess we as medical staff have been exposed to enough Germz that we’re more immune to this or something’ theory 

ah, i love the meaningless (to me) alien robot medical jargon 

drift and ratchet hhhhhhhhh

‘I'm too wide’ fort max L O R G E

also once again drift is forgotten in favor of a bunch of other dramatic stuff happening vbhjksdfbjhskdf

godddd i love tailgates little flashbacks where we see how Important and Special he is, complete with his ‘bomb disposal’ arm label...augh its so good! 

and tailgate’s autopedia page even reflects his lies! like, did tailgate go edit that first thing upon waking up??? seriously, I'm fascinated by tailgate’s meticulous dedication to his fake life

also the fact that ultra magnus believes everything he read on autopedia is amazing lmao

ultra magnus: you think somebody would just go on the internet and tell lies? 

fuckgin love magnus’s long ass name/title placard 

tailgate hvbahjkdfbjhaskf i mean, he’s gotten the abridged version of everything else, of course he would assume that’d be the case here too...but not on magnus’s watch

magnus cant even say ‘fun’ hvukdasdbjfkjsadf i love my uptight law dad

love rung implying that upon questioning, he would easily divulge a patient’s name and maybe even information about said patient’s treatment while under him....love the disregard for patient confidentiality and hipaa in general 

not that hipaa seems to exist here, at least not in a fully realized form 

also i mean the above genuinely, i think rung’s tendency towards at least slight malpractice is very interesting 

poor red alert....super bad luck that HE was the guy to get roped up in that overlord business 

I'm glad that, at the very least, red alert was able to prove that he was Actually hearing something to rung, rather than get brushed off completely 

god magnus and tailgate’s interactions are golden 

also tg is much more sarcastic/quippy than anyone gives him credit for tbh

‘thought warfare,’ ultra magnus says with complete seriousness. god i fucking love this comic

now i can tell pharma apart from ratchet bc pharma has let his true Petty Bitch nature emerge and you can see it in his expressions

the whole ‘tarn is addicted to transforming’ thing didn't really go anywhere, right? i feel like i noticed that on my second readthru as well 

also pharma is such an interesting character given the context of him like, trying to strike a bargain w/the djd to keep them from destroying delphi, but that arrangement inevitably kinda making him lose it as the situation escalates. he’s also just really entertaining bc i feel like he kins the joker or st and probably gets into really heated arguments w/people on twitter about just abt anything

‘sound bomb’ i love this comic

another important facet of pharma’s character becomes clear around this time as well - how he’s really into ratchet. i also choose to read them as awful exes tbh, it makes their dynamic even more entertaining

‘killmaster, with the wand’ is one of my favorite running remarks lmao

also, was killmaster even a character before mtmte? or, if he was, was he an important one? it would crack me up the most if he literally didn't exist at all, but any way you spin it is still funny 

ratchet’s tiny humansona facing off against pharma is wild

‘I'm miles from anyone i truly care about’ brutal, ratchet, drift is dying like 2 floors away (im p sure)

SUDDENLY DRIFT IS HERE, ACTUALLY 

oh don't worry first aid, that sure isn't the last we’ll be seeing of pharma 

so like, did first aid save everyone by posting that data log to his wreckers fan blog or something? lmao love it 

i love the pretty fucked up reveal of ratchet having stolen pharma’s hands. like, damn dude. 

and that wraps up the delphi arc! our first true ‘arc’ of mtmte, and a fantastic one at that. short and snappy and fresh, with some very clever writing and cool new characters, and a lot of great plot threads to be picked up later. plus, we got to see the beginnings of drift and ratchet’s whole thing (and ratchet and pharmas whole thing). and the lost light gets some much needed extra medical staff, so everyone wins! 

well, we’ll see how fort max feels about this all pretty soon.....

[bi-lullaby]

No one asked

And I should be studying, but here are some thoughts for season 16 so far:

(SPOILER WARNING, OBVIOUSLY)

1 - Merluca and it’s parts: COUPLES FIGHT STOP PREDICTING THE WORST OK. They’ve been completely adorable so far, but this is what someone said in a interview: “This is the after in happy ever after” (or something to that effect). They’re gonna fight and them they’re gonna make up, I hope. As for their fight: They were both in the right imo. Yes, Meredith is being inconsequent and it must be so frustrating for Deluca to A)Have her continue risking her career and license and freedom when he went to such lengths to help that, B) Be crapped on constantly bc of something your girlfriend did. Yes, Meredith is completely right in fighting the system that is so throughtly broken, and yes, coming to apologize to her mentor and longtime friend was completely the right thing to do. I wanna see merluca wedding and marriage! Maybe (since there are two pregnant people in this season already?) next season will be Mer and Jo? One can dream! For them individually: Poor Mer, she has bitten more than she can chew but she is ready to take on this fight! Imma love to see her as auntie mer! I mis merjolex so much tho, I know she’s been busy and all but they seem to forget she is a important part in their support system. Andrew has been all over the place. I love his confidence, but in the ep where he literally screamed at Bailey over her trying to teach an intern? And called her out bc she was using a different material than Mer? I was a bit off-thrown. But he’s still a great character I enjoy watching. Hope they find the balance between confidence and arrogance for him, and develop him even more!

2 - Amelink: AAAAAA. They’re so amazing and perfect and sweet and I wanna hug them both. Link is everything you could wish for, Amy is adorable as ever. If they lay a finger on either them as a couple, them as individuals, or their baby, imma kick some asses. I don’t think they will tho, Amy is been through SO MUCH already and she deserves a breath.

3 - Bailey: OMG SHE IS PREGNANT AAAAAAAA. I’m so happy! Ben is already a great dad, this will be so fun to watch! Hope they don’t put her through the ringer with a difficult pregnancy or a sick child, she does not deserve this! She already nearly lost her first child while giving birth in a bomb-y hospital while her husband had brain surgery NEXT to the bomb. Enough pregnancy drama for a lifetime. As for her actions: I’ve said before: I’m pissed, yes. She’s acting way too harsh and taking it out on people and more importantly (as I’ve touched on in my female grey’s characters ranking post) she’s out of character. Where is the Bailey that went around the hospital runnning after the attendings and kicking their asses into signing her proposal for a free clinic? And gave them a speech on how they had failed her and she needed something to believe in in medicine? She was one of the first characters to point out how broken the system was, to take direct action to try and fix it. Sure, she likes to try and work within the rules as much as possible, much she is not adverse to breaking a few of them if she thinks it’s necessary (hello deactivated HIV inside a young boy’s body without parental consent! Hello changing the date on a surgery which is also insurance fraud!)! If she thinks it’ll save a life! But also, she’s not completely wrong: Meredith did commit a crime, as good as her intentions were; As her boss, firing her was the only logical decision. She thought her hospital (which she dedicated a good half of her life to) was being attacked by someone she trained into the surgeon she is, ofc she’d be mad as all hell. Quadri was disrespectful, not doing her job well, actively getting in the way of her superior doing her job, screaming at her boss in the middle of the hallway about how she didn’t want to work there - firing her was a tad extreme (specially for a charact who has never, herself, had any qualms ahout mouthing off to her own superiors when she didn’t think something was right) but not completely out of nowhere. I hate hate hate how they’ll probs throw a “oh she was being crazy bc pregnancy hormones!” line after seeing how her actions have been badly perceived by people (like there isn’t enough a stereotype that women can’t have positions of power because hormones make them crazy) instead of “hey this character was put in extremely uncomfortable and tough positiona after extremely uncomfortable and tough positions and came off as harsher than necessary while trying to balance a world-class hospital crisis”. Ugh.

4 - Jackson: Ok so the last few eps have rekindled my love for him and I’m relieved! There’s the good, kind, funny and smart guy I like! I was mad bc of the whole Jaggie drama, but hey, shit happens! If they will be better apart, then I’m happy! (Ok 50% of this is because of what he said to levi! Stanning Meredith Grey + dorky Harry Potter reference? Yes!!!!). I hope this season will be kind on him, that he and Vicky work out well (from what I gathered about it, she has also been through a lot) and that we see more Harriet!

5 - Maggie: Baby girl. I love that they’re consistent that she has a jealous streak but is also a very good person who is always trying her best. Plus, official womb secret bearer is the best title omg! Maybe she should change from cardio to obgyn, lol! Plus, the sisters are everything to me! She instantaneous knew Amy was mad! She stood up for Mer! Aaaaa I love them!!!! Hope this show ends with all three of them happy and loved and badass as always!

6 - Others: Tom has been an.... Interesting piece. I love him, but his antics are almost caricature-esque now and it’s getting on my nerves. He was detestable in exploitating that family’s pain but also, the hospital did need a pr boost or it’d be in even hotter waters! The restraining order on Owen was a tad much bc it got in the way of patient care, but also he did get electrocuted in a very sensitive area by someone who had just gotten together with his ex - I’d be a little suspicious that it was 100% unintentional tbh. He’s power drunk and needs to be turned down a notch. Schmit and Nico and adorkable as always and I loved Nico’s speech about demanding more of himself - That’s one of the biggest traps of low self-steem and Imm glad it’s mentioned. I’ll miss Quadri. Helm being a MeredithGrey stan first and person second is still me lol. I loved how this last ep showed how much of a family they are - all the connections and shared pasts and references to relationships and what not. The “bird” storyline was so cute! Pac North seems so promissing and I’ll cry ugly tears when my baby Alex turns that ish around and shows everyone who’s boss!!!! The whole “the world is broken” theme of the season is my jam! Sadly, irl that handful of people are not gonna turn it around, but I want to see it happen on my screen! The medical system being fixed! As a future doctor (I promissed myself I’d not be the person who brings it up in every opportunity but lol here I am) it’d make me so happy! Against my better judgment, I’m liking Towen! They are trying, they’re really trying! Owen has done nothing wrong so far (besides offering to milk teddy which was just dumb, not malicious) and has been great at stepping down from his job so she could work! And him at Pac North will be great tbh - as much as I didlike him, he is an excellent doctor and strategist and he was a great chief at GS (until the last bit which was just gross negligence). From the promo for next ep: I don’t think they’ll make Webber cheat again. It’d be predictable and cheap and I’d be so mad that we’d have another round of acting like he’s a saint with a tiny issue of being a cheater. What I theorize is: He’ll have lunch with his friend, and either A) She’ll be friendly at the wrong time and Catherine will walk in and then think he’s cheating and it’ll be a mess, or B) Gemma is gonna try to get him back to drinking (Or maybe C) She was telling him to stop being bullheaded and fighting with his wife when life is so short). Cristina reference in the text omg, my heart!

Sorry for the long rant!

[awesome-timtams]

INFINITY WAR/AVENGERS 4 THEORY + ALL MY RANTS (SPOILERS)

because you know what? i’m not done.

i’ve come up with a theory, if only just to comfort myself. also, i’m still kinda unhappy over some things. (although this movie is really good, so please don’t judge the film too harshly based on other spoilers you’ve read. give it a chance and watch it before you form opinions please? :D )

WARNING: MAJOR SPOILERS UNDER CUT. 

like, i’m not gonna censor myself. i’m just gonna rant. so you have been warned.

(if anybody wants me to add any tags to this post, just comment or smthin and ill do it yo)

LAST CHANCE FOR NO SPOILERS. WE COOL? OK.

just wanna say right off the bat, i’m not a comic fan. i’ve never read the comics. i don’t know shit about the comics. so all of this may come off as really stupid to comic fans, and for that, i apologise.

(also, after typing this all up, i’m realising just how negative i seem to come off this entire post? like, there were flaws, don’t get me wrong, i pointed out stuff i didn’t like, but overall this movie was really good. i fucking loved this movie. i went into the theatres really worried because there were so many characters and i was scared that it was gonna become real messy real quick and the plot would kinda be all over the place and overstuffed, but it actually worked out quite well in the end. there was a lot of humour and that’s great, because who isn’t up for humour? and it got real emotional and heartbreaking, and that was done really well so i applaud. i really do recommend going to watch this movie, because like seriously, it’s fucking good. went out of the cinemas and nearly walked straight back in to see it again)

now, theory first!

alright, so we remember how red skull ‘died’ right? he was holding the space stone, and as he’s holding it he starts to kinda ash away before he gets beamed up into space.

remember who else gets ashed?

just about everybody in the fucking movie (still not over that. god. i started fucking bawling my eyes out. was not very dignifying)

but yes, i think that they didn’t actually die? instead, they actually got transported to another universe like the red skull was? (or even better, their souls got sent to another universe, because after further research, that’s apparently what the soul stone does? and anyway, none of them got physically beamed somewhere like the red skull did. they all just faded to ash. i noticed that when wanda got ashed though, her entire being seemed to go grey for a brief couple of seconds before she turned to ash, and that kinda strikes me as what would happen if you lost the very essence of yourself? like your soul? so yeah, space stone beamed the red skull to a different universe physically, but the soul stone beamed them to a different universe…spiritually (also, i’m making this edit at 3 am in the morning so excuse if it’s just really incoherent)) because it didn’t escape anybody’s notice that none of the original avengers died right? only all the new heroes with confirmed sequels and shit did? 

so i think they’re actually safe but just in a different place for now. and then all the original avengers, in the next movie are gonna do some shit and sacrifice themselves to save everybody who got ashed. 

cus like, i refuse to believe they are permanently dead. i mean, c’mon. t’challa? the king of wakanda who’s arc only just got started? peter parker? when spiderman homecoming 2 has already been confirmed and is gonna start shooting soon? bucky? who’s had the whole white wolf thing/taking over the mantle as cap teased but neither were acted upon? fucking bullshit i tell you. didn’t stop me from fucking bawling my eyes out in the cinema. jfc i started crying like halfway thru the movie at gamora, escalated at bucky and then just curled into myself and died a little when peter clung on to tony. so yeah.

also i feel like they didn’t need to make the red skull come back and become the guardian of the soul stone. he wasn’t important, and was only there to give a bit of context into how to retrieve the soul stone. they could’ve easily just put a faceless character and have them do the exact same job and it would’ve made exactly zero change to the plot. so if the red skull is back, they must’ve done it for a reason. and that reason, i think, is the one i’ve been explaining above; to possibly show that being ashed isn’t gonna kill you, but instead transport you elsewhere. (also, yo, did anybody get dementor vibes when the red skull first appeared on screen?)

maybe this theory is just me being in denial over my favourites being killed god.

now onto my rants.

i thinkl loki and gamora are permanently dead. not happy about either deaths. loki’s was just…it’s just bullshit? he’s been killed and revived so many times that the emotional value of it is just not there anymore. and also, i don’t belive loki is stupid enough to go at thanos and pull a fucking pocketknife on him like, what’s that gonna do mate? and i feel loki, if he had a death scene, definitely deserved better than that. i feel like his arc kinda just got started, so him being killed off is kinda. urgh. so i’m pretty sure that loki’s not dead (cus c’mon), but at the same time if they bring him back it’s gonna be so fucking overplayed it’s gonna be like another episode of supernatural (i still love you spn but actually tho). so basically, marvel’s got themselves in a bit of a dump.

now onto gamora. idk, i’m just really not happy with the way she died? she didn’t deserve to go out like that? i mean, he sees his cause as the greater good, and people sacrifice a lot for their greater good, but still. not cool? i’m upset? gamora deserved so much more than to be tossed off that fuckin cliff? i actually reallyyyyy wanted gamora (or nebula) to be the one to kill thanos. maybe together. cus tbh fuck thanos. he fucked up their lives so hard, and what does gamora get in the end? thrown off a cliff, that’s what.

ALSO, QUILL. WHY. MATE. COULDN’T YOU HAVE DECKED THE SHIT OUT OF THANOS AFTER THEY MANAGED TO PULL OFF THE GAUNTLET??????? THEY WERE THIS. FUCKING. CLOSE. ARGHHHHHH.

also i’m still not over peter and bucky. god. bucky kinda stumbling out of the woods, and that little ‘…steve?’ before he just fucking. crumbles away. i was so fucking. no words. and i already knew peter was gonna die cus of that giRL (if you wanna see THAT rant, click here). but it was actually still so fucking heartbreaking? ‘…i don’t feel so good’ and ‘please, i don’t want to die’ as he just sobs while crumbling to ash in tony’s arms? i started bawling my eyes out (and wow take a shot every time i say that phrase in this post)

ok now onto some other things. i feel like this film sort of rendered most of ragnarok obsolete? like, (and this point was brought up by a friend so shout out to them) weren’t they trying to make it so that thor was less reliant on his weapons and more reliant on his own abilities and powers? and also, asgard. they gave us so much hope for asgard at the end of ragnarok, only to have it dashed apart in the beginning of infinity war. asgard? more like…asGONE. ba dum tss. (shitty joke i know but that’s how i cope). also. where. the fuck. is valkyrie?? i swear to god if she’s dead imma cut a bitch. 

also, i’m sort of upsetti clint didn’t show up in this movie. BUT. they mentioned at the beginning of the film that clint was off with scott to do some other shit regarding their families or smthin, which makes me think that maybe, just maybe, clint might actually show up in ant-man and the wasp. so, looking forward to that.

so yes, i feel like i’ve been quite negative throughout this post, so here’s a couple paragraphs dedicated to all the good things about this movie and my experience and why i love it. 

post-credits scene was? like, maria being ashed shook the whole cinema? and nick fury’s being ashed got me upset right up until the point where he swore and that kinda loosened the mood up. he’s so chill about everything i s2g. and that captain marvel insignia drop at the end was amazing. had the whole theatre shook. so yes, good post-credits scene.

they did emotions really well? especially in the last 20 mins, when everybody is being ashed, like, i cried. a lot. some of the emotions just came so clearly across the screen, and you could really feel what the characters themselves were feeling at the moment. some of the scenes were truly heartbreaking and beautiful (JUST, QUICK BREAK TO GIVE A SHOUTOUT TO TOM HOLLAND FOR HIS AMAZING PERFORMANCE? THANK YOU.)

the humour in this movie is fucking outstanding, but they never got in the way of the emotional scenes. the jokes were hilarious, and didn’t feel shoehorned in. they had the cinema rolling, and honestly, it was great. also, can i just say that quill being jealous of thor’s masculinity is fucking hilarious. and dr strange and tony going at it and trying to beat each other in who’s the most arrogant and all-knowing was fucking amazing, so kudos. anD ALSO. BRUCE AND HULK? FUCKING AMAZING. LOVED THEIR INTERACTIONS TBH. i would quote lines right now but i’m kinda fuzzy about them and i hate nothing more than misquoting so.

also. THOR. THOR. HIS ENTRANCE INTO WAKANDA IS SO FUCKING BADASS AND I HAVEN’T STOPPED SCREAMING ABOUT IT? IT’S SO BLOODY COOL, HOW HE JUST SWOOPS IN ALL DRAMATIC AND SHIT WITH HIS NEW AXE AND LIGHTNING AND JFALKGJRIOA yeah that was awesome.

i feel like i haven’t ever seen a movie with the audience as engaged as they were today. like, when certain characters showed up on screen the audience lost their shit and started whooping and clapping and shit. and when tony got stabbed i s2g the entire cinema just. stopped breathing. so yeah, good experience, fun times, loved it, really got me in the mood tbh.

i think i just about covered everything i wanted to say in this post? (and wow, this is a real bit of a giant brain dump. i just started typing anything that came to mind) maybe i’ll add to it if i think of anymore things, because i still feel like i have more to say even though i can’t really say anything right now. if any of you wanna talk, just message me and i’m up to listen lol.

this whole post took me the better half of three hours ( it’s also > 1500 words, and wow, i could’ve used all this time to finish my english assessment oops), so imma just go and do my homework like the good child i am (hah).

tldr; everybody who was ashed is actually alive, original avengers are gonna sacrifice themselves in avengers 4 to save the ashed kids, ragnarok was obsolete, im not happy with people’s deaths, clint might appear in ant-man and the wasp, this movie is really good and i fucking love it, feel free to msg me if u wanna talk and i’ve wasted too much time on this post. (this was still a really long tldr but i ranted for 1000 words so what can you do)

have a good one. (wow, extra aussie today aren’t we?)

[kyluxtrashpit]

For the writing game, I couldn't decide which, all the colors please? They're so interesting!

Omg I was so excited when I saw this! You’re so sweet to enable my rambling

Red: What type of writer’s block do you experience the most?

I guess the most common one is I get stuck in transitions. Like I know how this scene goes and I know how the next scene goes, but I don’t know exactly how to get from A to B and it’s one of those cases where I can’t just put a line and jump to it. Scene transitions are one of the hardest things for me for some reason. The second most common for me is probably when my brain is being a shit and won’t let me be productive due to some sort of emotional crisis lmao

White: Are you a supporter/lover of fanfiction?

I mean, kind of obvious lmao, but absolutely. I think it’s great that there are people who are creating things solely out of love for something, and that’s really what fanfiction is, at it’s deepest core. It’s a community of people being so enthusiastic about and loving something so hard that they work their asses of and dedicate time to just… making more of it. For no real external benefit other than some social validation, if they’re lucky. Love and passion are the true motivators and idk that’s just really beautiful to me

Black: Would you want to live in one of the fictional worlds you’vecreated?

I don’t really do a lot of worldbuilding because I find it incredibly boring and I’m terrible at it lmao, but since I always write either canon-verse or modern au, I’m going to treat this as ‘do I want to live in the Star Wars universe?’. And the answer to that would honestly be no. As much as there’s cool stuff, like advanced technology and aliens and maybe I’d be lucky enough to be able to move shit with my mind, there’s also a lot of bad things. A lot of fascism, a lot of wars, and every once in a while some asshole builds a planet-destroying superweapon and blows up a planet (or 5) and like… I could live on one of those, you know

That said, if I didn’t die because the planet I was living on exploded, I would probably survive alright. I mean, my background is in science, so tbh I might have better opportunities there than I do here. While that could mean making chemical weapons or something if the Empire was in power, that’s at least more interesting than customer service at a chemical company lmao. I still wouldn’t choose to live there, but I think I’d manage okay if I had to

[More beneath the cut - my sincerest apologies to those on mobile]

Blue: What’s more important to you: characters or plot?

I mean, they both definitely matter, but if I have to choose? Interesting characters can save a dry plot, but the best plot ever written will still be mediocre at best if the characters aren’t compelling. Personally, I love character-driven stories more than anything. Event-driven plots can still be fun, but I prefer the focus to be on how the characters are dealing with said events, as opposed to them just being passively driven along by them. The best is when it’s the characters themselves driving the events of the plot, but that’s more difficult to execute than it sounds. Regardless, it’s the characters that usually draw me into a story in the first place and that keep me interested. And from the perspective of my own writing, I go character-driven, all the way. Sure, some event might happen that drives the plot sometimes, but I’m far more interested in how the characters react to that event than anything else

Yellow: What’s a common writing tip that you mostly ignore?

In terms of writing advice, nothing makes my blood boil more than those posts that say ‘get rid of this entire class of words’ or ‘if it’s not absolutely strictly necessary to the plot, cut it’. Fuck that shit. If you want your writing to look like Hemingway, sure, go for it, but a) Hemingway is overrated, and b) that’s not the only way to write well. Especially as someone who tends to focus on characters, passages that aren’t necessary to the plot may be necessary to establish characterization. Or they may add some emotion to the story that gets the reader invested. Same with wording choices; more or less words can drastically change the tone or mood of the scene. Are there times when you need to cut words and keep things concise? Absolutely, but any writing tip that says ‘remove every instance of [word] in your document’ is fucking bullshit and you should never listen to it

Grey: What’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

Tbh I think every writing tip you see should always be taken with a grain of salt, especially if it’s a ‘never do x’ because there is almost always a situation where doing x is the right thing to do, it’s just a matter of knowing how to do it correctly (looking at you, ‘never use the passive voice’). So really, there are very few I always follow, but I’ll give one that was foundationally helpful for me

Edit in a different format than you write. That can be changing the text size, or the font, or printing it out physically, or whatever. For me, I usually pop it into AO3′s preview function and take notes of things that need changing as I go. It forces your brain to notice things it’s been overlooking for the entire writing period. I only do my final edit this way, generally speaking, but I’ve found it to be incredibly helpful for catching typos and general weirdness in the writing

Orange: How many projects do you usually have going at once?

Because my fics are usually short, I tend to only have 1, but I think I’ve had up to 3-4 before. That’s basically me just popping between documents everytime I get stuck on one until one is finished lmao. But more than 2 gets to be a lot to handle

Currently, I’m really only working on my Big Bang fic, though I do have at least one one-shot I’m planning to write when I need a short break from it

Pink: Which of your characters would become your best friend?

This is so hard because like, I don’t get along with a lot of people generally speaking. I’m also going to treat this as the entire SW cast even though I only write Kylo and Hux, for the most part. And I’m not sure I’d be good friends with either of them. While Kylo would make an excellent self-destruction buddy, I think we’re too similar for the most part to get along. And while I also have an element of Hux in me that’s my anal retentiveness when it comes to organization (not to be confused with cleanliness; I’m talking more about my colour-coded work email and my nested folder system on my computer), I’m also very emotional, messy, and I’m not really equipped to verbally spar with him. I think I would actually do okay with Hux as a boss, not a friend, but with Kylo, I think we’d get along really well until we really didn’t. And then I would be dead lmao

Aaaand none of that was an actual answer. But like, I honestly don’t know? Most of the other characters I really like (e.g. Rey, Rae Sloane, Ventress), it’s because I would have a big huge crush on them which would manifest as my hovering in their vicinity a lot but never actually starting a conversation and then waxing poetic while crying about my unrequited love when I continue to go unnoticed lmao. Which is, well, still not friendship

Maybe Finn… I might get along really well with Finn. He’s one of my favourites as well and I think he’d be really interesting to talk to. Has a lot of interesting views on things, likely a good listener. Hm. I’m still not 100% solid on it, but after far too many words, that’s my answer lmao

Purple: Which of your characters would become your sworn enemy?

Okay, hear me out on this one because the reason isn’t what you think lmao. I’m also treating this less as ‘sworn enemy’ and more ‘person I’d least get along with’ and that’s actually Poe. And the reason is that highly extroverted, extremely friendly people who others call charismatic tend to rub me the wrong way. Like there’s nothing wrong with them, they’re perfectly nice, but they’re just too friendly and my socially-inept, introverted brain always responds to that with DANGER DANGER. And I think he would definitely fall into that category for me haha

Green: Pencil, typewriter, or computer?

Computer. I have written fic by hand before (I also sometimes do planning by hand, just because it can be a bit more visual; Fractured was planned largely by hand when I used to work evenings at a gym and had access to unlimited spare paper), but that’s usually only when I have nothing else to work with. I wrote most of a fic in the Halifax airport on a layover, once. I’ve also done it on my phone, but that’s too fucking annoying lmao. Typerwriters are super fun to use but also very impractical for me; my typing accuracy isn’t good enough

Brown: Do you have a set writing space? Or do you write everywhere?

Mostly I’m at home on my couch, but that’s really cause I have nowhere else to write. I do write at work sometimes (not smut though lmao), but only when it’s slow enough that I can get away with it. And there’s nowhere else I really go where I’m sitting with a computer for long periods of time

Silver: Are you comfortable writing in public places?

I am, yeah. I don’t know why I wouldn’t be tbh. Work is a public place and the only reason I don’t write smut there is because I don’t want to get fired lmao (slacking off is one thing, porn is another). I don’t really ever write in public, but that’s more because I don’t spend a lot of time sitting in public places by myself

Gold: Do your stories usually contain lessons or morals?

Not really… I can’t think of any at least. They always have some sort of closure, though, because I fucking hate open-ended stuff where everything isn’t worked out in the end lmao (or is at least on it’s way there). I’m too fragile for that shit haha

Clear: Do your characters control where the story goes or do youmaintain control?

I tend to write more like an rper than an actual author, based on conversations I’ve had with others, so my characters have a lot of control. That said, if you’ve got your plot and all the major points of it planned out and then you get halfway through and find it doesn’t work because of the characters, then that’s a failure in planning, not the characters taking control. Sometimes things do change and are reworked as you go, that’s the nature of writing, but that still means your plan needed some adjusting, you just didn’t know it at the time. I intentionally leave a lot of room in my plans for the characters (e.g. ‘and then they talk about [blank]. Hux says something mean and Kylo gets angry’ might be my only note for an entire scene), but if you’ve planned enough to actually start writing, your characters and plot should already work together. Characters control the minor details of the story, not the major plot

Tan: Are you open to co-writing a story?

I might be. I’ve never done it before and the Big Bang I’m doing now is the most collaborative thing I’ve ever done writing-wise. If someone approached me and was really interested in it, I might be willing to give it a shot. I’m not really sure how it works, though. I tend to envision it as basically an rp except it’s planned out beforehand and then edited afterwards, but in all honesty, I have no idea how it actually goes

[whatmoredoyouwant]

I was tagged by @laufire (okay like, not really, but it said whoever wants to do it! lol)

Rules: choose any three fandoms (in random order) and answer the questions, then tag some friends

Fandoms:

The 100

Grey’s Anatomy

Lost

The First Character You Loved:

Oh wow. Hard one. Hmm...it’s especially hard cause I just rewatched the whole show, so my “first impressions” are a little skewed. I don’t know if it’s more Octavia Blake or Clarke Griffin tbh. I’m like horribly in love with Eliza Taylor, so that’s a big factor, but Octavia’s character is so dynamic and fun. I loved her from that first, “We’re back, bitches!”

This is even harder because the characters have changed so much! I think it would have to be Cristina Yang, even though she’s not in the show anymore. I miss her so much!

100% without a doubt, Charlie Pace. When I watched the show when I was younger, when it was still on TV, I bawled my friggin’ eyes out every near-death and then his eventual death. It’s funny because now I don’t like him nearly as much.

The Character You Never Expected To Love So Much:

Just based on how she was first introduced, Lexa kom Trikru. We get introduced to this badass warrior Commander, twirling a knife and ordering the deaths of Skaikru for burning her warriors, and she turns out to be the biggest gay softie in the world.

A L E X K A R E V. Holy shit, dude. If you told me that Alex Karev would be one of my favourite characters of all time during the first few seasons, I would have laughed. He’s such an asshole, he doesn’t care about anyone, he’s all about machismo and sleeping with the ladies. And then all of a sudden he does this 180 and the whole macho tough guy is just an act, and he’s just this SWEET SOFT TEDDY BEAR UNDERNEATH.

It’s actually crazy how much of a Sun-Hwa Kwon stan I became after rewatching. She’s just such a fucking badass??? Like, nothing gets her down. And the people that disagree with me that Sun is a Slytherin are just WRONG. Like, the woman learns an entirely different language to get away from her murderous, tyrannical father and arguably abusive husband, and plans to just disappear off into a different country. And then, in the flash forwards, she BUYS OUT HER FATHER’S COMPANY? Slytherin. SUCH a Slytherin.

The Character You Relate To The Most:

Hmm...it’s hard to relate to characters in a post-apocalyptic setting, to be honest, cause I just don’t deal with their issues lol. I feel like I would have to say Clarke Griffin, if only for the fact that she’s a headstrong, stubborn bisexual who tries her best to do the right thing, even if sometimes she’s wrong. That’s the closest similarity I can draw from the characters.

Hands down, Cristina Yang. The commitment issues, the aversion to having a baby, the total 100% dedication and obsession with her job and working? Oh, please, I AM Cristina Yang.

Let’s see, Kate’s a runaway, Claire’s pregnant, Shannon’s a rich kid, Sun is too, I don’t know that I can necessarily relate to any of the women. And the men, like, not at all. Everyone seems to have daddy issues and I don’t have those lol. I have “mommy issues.” Does anyone have mom issues? Ooh ooh! Ana Lucia Cortez! Totally had mom issues. Again, that’s really the closest similarity that I can draw from these characters.

The Character You’d Slap:

Ooh man, so many. Thelonious Jaha, for starters. Like, why are you even here anymore? All you do is cause chaos. They should have locked him out of the bunker.

I don’t know that I’d necessarily slap him, but I really don’t like Richard Webber. He has such anger issues and I feel like he just causes unnecessary tension and drama all the time. And his and Catherine Avery’s relationship is so tumultuous and at times, borderline toxic, I’m just sick of seeing the two of them.

Haha, I feel like my first instinct is James Ford aka Sawyer, just because he’s an ass most of the time, but I love him too much. So I’m saying John Locke, because holy shit, dude, can you cause any more trouble?? Just like I said with Jaha, ALL YOU CAUSE IS CHAOS.

Three Favourite Characters (In Order Of Preference):

Raven Reyes, Clarke Griffin, and John Murphy.

Cristina Yang, Stephanie Edwards, and April Kepner

Desmond Hume, Juliet Burke, and Sun-Hwa Kwon

A Character You Liked At First But Don’t Anymore:

Jasper Jordan. This show did you so dirty, my poor child. They should have made him go up in the rocket into space with the rest of them. Can you imagine, crazy alcoholic Jasper Jordan, basically being forced into rehab and made to face his demons? Anyway, yeah, he just went a little too crazy for me, and then he just became a nuisance.

I can’t really think of a character that I liked but don’t anymore. If I had to pick someone, maybe Izzy Stevens? I think she got kind of selfish after living through her cancer death, and then she treated Alex really horribly. I was really happy when he told her he deserved more. But like, it’s honestly me nitpicking a character. I certainly don’t hate Izzy, not even close, I just have to pick SOMEONE.

I already mentioned her, but Ana Lucia Cortez was my first girl crush. When I was young, when the show first came out, I was nine years old and didn’t have any idea I was bisexual. I was IN LOVE with Ana Lucia, I was so upset when she died. Years later, when I rewatched it, it dawned on me just how much I hated her character, and I was like, “Why was she my favourite??” And my gay ass was like, “Ohhhh, it’s cause she’s hot as fuck. Got it.”

A Character You Did Not Like At First But Now Do:

They kind of already asked this? But well, I guess it’s a little bit different. For this one, I’ll say John Murphy. He was SUCH an ass, and I mean, he still is, but now he’s a little more human. And even when you watch him being an ass in the first season, you kind of understand it a little bit more now. Certain things can’t be excused, obviously, but at least they’re better explained.

Ooh, wait, another good one! I couldn’t STAND Arizona Robbins when she was introduced. My boss at the time, Ricky, I was talking to him when I first started watching it (when we were in season 12 I think) and he kept asking me to tell him when I’d met Arizona. And when I finally did, I didn’t get it at all. I was like, “Why do you like her? She’s awful??” And now I LOVE HER SO MUCH.

Benjamin Linus. God, I HATED him when I first watched the show, because obviously, he was the “big bad guy.” Now...well, he’s still a bad guy, but I appreciate his character so much more. Especially in the last few episodes! He really redeems himself.

Three OTPs: (I decided to read this as 3 OTPs for each fandom because I can) (I’m following suit, 3 OTPS per show!)

Oh man. Don’t even get me staaaaarted. Linctavia will forever be like, my most painful OTP. Followed of course, by Clexa. The third one is hard though? Honestly, I just wanted to ship Roan with someone, just cause I found him so effing hot. Any time he was on screen with someone, anyone at all, I went, “I ship it.” But realistically, like a real ship, I guess I would say Memori. Even though Emori is hard for me to like. I’m hoping she’ll be more likeable in season 5.

This is so painful. Mark Sloan/Lexie Grey, again, my most painful OTP and oh GOD, I miss them so much. Alex Karev/Meredith Grey, don’t JUDGE ME OKAY? And again, the last one is hard. I think it’s a tie between Calzona and Japril. Calzona really fell apart, and fell apart hard, whereas Japril is still kind of being hinted at? (Even though this awful Maggie/Jackson thing is being pushed now, I can’t staaaand this.) 

I was a total Sawyer/Kate shipper as opposed to Jack/Kate, and I stand by that. But on that note, Sawyer/Juliet is my I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP ship. THEY BELONGED TOGETHER. When I was younger, I shipped the hell out of Claire and Charlie but now I kind of hate them together. And now I ship the hell out of Desmond/Charlie lol. Oh, and of course Desmond and Penny, but still, the Desmond/Charlie ship has sailed and I am the captain.

I don’t think I really have any friends on this site who would actually do this if I tagged them...so I’m just gonna say anyone who wants to do it should, just tag @sassybrowsreyes in your post!

[dvrksiider]

multiples of 3 for the OC questions

Super detailed questions about your OCs || Not Accepting (thx nida :p) 

@errantson​

3. Did they have a good childhood? What are fond memories they have of it? What’s a bad memory? 

Main Verse: Nyla had an average childhood. Not necessarily good or bad (I don’t know if neutral is the best word here). The few fond memories were her warrior training before her Force sensitivity kicked in at full throttle. 

Light Side Au: Corryn feels she had a good childhood. Of course it was difficult for her because of her sensory overload and the intense training she began as a little kid. She fondly remembers spending time with her mother and father and how proud they were of her. 

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

Main Verse: She kept to herself and was distant. During her short time at the praxeum, she made very little friends. She was a bright kid with a lot of potential but the sensory disorder combined with her Force connection made her learning environment toxic and agonizing. Nyla finished her training with Snoke; out of her 17 years of training, 14 years were dedicated to darkness. During this time Nyla learned the ins and outs of pain, what made people tick and how a person could be broken. She also discovered she had a knack for Sith Alchemy.

Light Side Au: Corryn was shy and distant at first before finally feeling comfortable enough around the other students. She grew to love the academy as well as Luke and most of her peers. Before her 18th birthday, she went to Coruscant to start her sentinel training where they were busy restoring the Jedi Archives. Corryn stopped her training for a year once she discovered the praxeum had been destroyed. After that, she went back to Coruscant for another two years to study under her second master. She studied the old Jedi texts in great detail and learned how to strengthen and maintain control of her connection to the Force.

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals? 

Main Verse: Nyla is mean so therefore animals are like “uh no way.” She doesn’t particularly care for them either. There’s probably an unspoken agreement between her and creatures of the galaxy which involves both parties staying out of the other’s way. 

Light Side Au: Corryn loves animals. Most animals seem to like her as well. She helped Mara Eclipse take care of a smuggled Porg and the little guy has now won just about everyone’s heart around base. (eron wants to eat him??!! but he’s a good boi!!) 

 12. What is their favourite food? 

Main Verse: Traditional Mandalorian dishes. Whatever will give her the strength and nutrients needed to ensure her survival. Alcohol is nice too. 

Light Side Au: Corry loves meat ( a la Sokka), but really give this girl anything. She has a crazy metabolism and is a bottomless pit. 

15. Are they good at cooking? Do they enjoy it? What do others think of their cooking?

Main Verse: Nyla could survive on her own if need be, but because she’s aligned with the Order, she usually does not make her own meals unless away from her regiment or on some solo mission. In short she is adequate. 

Light Side Au: Corryn can cook decently. She’s actually better at baking and likes to surprise her friends and fellow Resistance members with something sweet every now and then. Most people would say she can make a good enough meal. 

18. What’s their favourite genre of: books, music, tv shows, films, video games and anything else

Main Verse: (gonna sound edgy but...) everything dark and macabre honestly. In a modern setting, Nyla would be all into horror and the supernatural.

Light Side Au: Corry enjoys action, adventure, mystery and comedy. She would be a fan of classic NES games and other pop culture phenomenon. 

21. Do they have a temper? Are they patient? What are they like when they do lose their temper?

Main Verse: Yes and no. Nyla’s secret is that she’s always seething. Unlike another dark sider, she’s gotten very good at masking it and keeping it under control. Nyla understands that there is a time and place for such anger- too much freedom will turn her into a loose canon. So in her right mind she is very selective about when and how she displays her anger. When she is angered enough, nothing is off limits; no words, no actions. The juxtaposition between her level persona and her rage induced state is incredible. It makes her all the more terrifying. 

Light Side Au: Corry can get a bit of a temper now and again. It’s nothing like that of her dark side self, but it can still be destructive in its own right. She’s been known to dig deep and say things that she knows will shut others up; ie something that might negatively resonate with someone. As she’s continuing to grow and learn, she’s always trying to develop more patience and finding healthier ways to express her anger. 

24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress?

Main Verse: Nyla only sleeps when it is required. (kinda like Leo Di Vinci) She has her own unique circadian rhythm. Some periods of time she gets adequate sleep. Other times she’s awake for days. Nyla’s silent breathing can be heard if listened closely, she prefers some level of comfort so a mattress in between soft and hard. 

Light Side Au: Depending on what’s going on in the Resistance determines Corry’s sleeping habits. She could be well rested some nights and then running on two-four hours other nights; nothing a good cup or twelve of caf can’t fix. She totally snores (nothing loud just noticeable. Mara can attest to it) and because of her sensory thing she likes soft things

27. What makes them sad? Do they cry regularly? Do they cry openly or hide it? What are they like they are sad?

Main Verse: The last time Nyla cried was when she was 10. So...I mean. As an adult, she doesn’t feel or experience sorrow the same way as she did in her youth. Things are just repressed before they can even be processed in real time. 

Light Side Au: The thought of never reuniting with her parents makes her sad. The thought of losing the war against the First Order makes her sad. The possibility of her friends and comrades dying makes her sad. Corry just feels a lot, okay? And while she’s not overly emotional, she will cry if she’s worked up enough and at that point she doesn’t care if people are around. She gets quiet and distant when she’s sad.

30. Do they exercise? Regularly? Or only when forced? What do they act like pre-work out and post-work out?

Main Verse: Nyla exercises pretty regularly (when she’s not in the middle of a mission that is). She’s very focused pre-work out and likes to tune out most things. She focuses only on herself and improvement. After work out, she’s calmer than usual and almost in a bit of a daze.

Light Side Au: Corryn tries to exercise regularly, but sometimes other things come up that are more important. She tries to be happy and positive before working out so she doesn’t give up halfway due to effort. Post work out, she’s tired and needs a shower and a nap tbh.

33. What underwear do they wear? Boxers or briefs? Lacey? Comfy granny panties?

Main Verse: Nyla wears bikini style and sometimes hipsters. 

Light Side Au: Corry wears hipsters and boyshorts most of the time. O my god corry you so gay

36. What are they good at? What hobbies do they like? Can they sing?

Main Verse: Well Nyla is good at murder. Not sure if that’s a hobby exactly...she is an exceptional duelist (her warrior training on Mandalore helped prepare her for this). She is also a very gifted psychometrist and performer of other dark Force powers; force storm, drain knowledge, memory walk, etc. I would pay to see Nyla sing. 

Light Side Au: Corryn is good at absorbing a lot of information in a small period of time. She is skilled with her lightsaber as well as Light side Force powers; battle meditation, Force concealment, Force protection, etc. Corryn isn’t a bad singer, of course when she’s drunk it is truly a spectacle. When sober she can carry a tune. 

39. Do they like letters? Or prefer emails/messaging? 

Main Verse: Nyla prefers holo messages. Gets the point across much faster and usually more effective (her methods are beyond brutal). 

Light Side Au: Corryn prefers letters because they are more personal. Growing up, she did her best to preserve her writing so she would never forget her mother tongue. 

42. What are their goals? What would they sacrifice anything for? What is their secret ambition?

Main Verse: Nyla wants power and control and she’s willing sacrifice her humanity for it. Her secret ambition is to kill her dark side master and take his place. But beyond that, Nyla desires to extend her reach beyond the First Order and to become the most powerful and formidable entity in the galaxy. 

Light Side Au: Corryn wants to become a self actualized Jedi Knight (grey jedi later). She would sacrifice herself for the Resistance and for her friends. It’s not a secret ambition, but Leia is currently helping her rise the military ranks so that she can become a well respected leader and teacher. 

45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves? 

Main Verse: People see Nyla as cruel, evil and diabolical. She can’t exactly dispute any of it and quite frankly she doesn’t care. She knows what she is and she revels in the darkness. 

Light Side Au: Most people think Corryn is a sweet girl determined to do the right thing. Sometimes she has self doubt but then she is reminded of who she is by result of her actions and feedback from those she fights alongside. 

48. Do they enjoy any parties? If so what kind? Do they organise the party or just turn up? How do they act? What if they didn’t want to go but were dragged along by a friend? 

Main Verse: Nyla would rather not. She only attends gatherings because it is expected from someone of her position. It’s all political and even she must save face and play along with the hierarchy of the Order. 

Light Side Au: Corryn enjoys smaller parties because too much going on overloads her senses. If it’s with people she likes and trusts then she’s bound to let loose and have a great time. If the party is huge then the poor kid becomes a wallflower. 

[tgr489]

A dancer, a developer, a socialist and a claustrophobe

How do you prepare for a lockdown? How long was it gonna it be? The government were saying 3 weeks, developments in other countries were telling a different story. How bad could it get? I’ve seen that movie Contagion, an eerily prophetic flick when viewed again post curfew one night.

As February ticked along we scrutinised our work plans, built our team and laid the foundations for a 3-month run. We had a couple of weeks downtime while we waited for details of our test group and preferred creative direction(s) we would be pursuing. Those weeks at the beginning of March were spent sliding forwards and back along the anxiety scale. The lockdown posed the possibility of being locked up in my apartment for an extended period and was troubling, actually deeply concerning. Squirrel and Lexi had been coming and going to mine as they pleased, sometimes together, often separately. We have a strange functional/recreational arrangement going on. It works for all of us, no one is under any pressure and we have fun. My fear was when told to isolate would they fuck off back to their respective nests, leaving me to fly solo in my own personal hells. The other area of consideration was that of work; it would likely be frozen for the duration! No work, no friends and nothing to do was/is one of my nightmares. I talked this out one night with Nic on FaceTime, who advised me to just pack up come home to New York, or leave for somewhere remote. We discussed possible remote locations over virtual whisky and bangers, planed our vast island retreats and who would be there rah-rah. Was fun talking bullshit with her, I miss her. I thought on it after the call, staring out of the window to Old Street and witching hour traffic, watching the last few stragglers stumbling their way home. I gazed around my place; it’s pretty big, so feeling confined isn’t much of an issue, no outside space to speak of, just a small balcony overlooking the courtyard, but there are a few small parks close by for any extended alfresco demands. It wouldn’t be so bad to stay here. If work got canned and the girls weren’t here what would I do? I can occupy my time well, but if I have months of it I’m really not sure how bad I would get. With hardly any of my effects here, I would be limited. Maybe Nic was right. After a restless night, I’d formulated the scenarios I was dealing with and went to my favourite local greasy spoon, the Shepherdess, for some artery-clogging sustenance. I sent out messages and put my fate in the hands of my friends. With a full builders breakfast in my belly, I went and lazed in the park with a cloud of smoke and waited for replies. it was a happy way to kill the time.

My invitation for the girls and Zac to move into mine were accepted, with thanks, and a caveat from Zac, his girlfriend had to come too. There were numerous reasons why, which I won’t bore you with, but fear and jealousy played the leads. We planned for the impending lockdown which was, by that time, inevitable. The mood was positive as we talked food, navigating each others’ preferences, likes, dislikes and allergies. The drink was a huge consideration point. How much do you drink? Be honest. Do you drink every day? Will circumstances in your life make you drink every day? Our drinks bill outdid food by 50%. Everyone thought I’d over-ordered, I wasn’t so sure. What remains now is like the back row of my parent's liquor cabinet and the random shit they bought for one person at a party which no-one else drinks. It won’t last long. I can’t see it go to waste and even though it may taste like shit, it’ll do the required job.

It was all smiles and laughter at the beginning. We cooked, ate meals together, played cards, danced, cried, talked and talked about anything and everything. An initial abundance of work saw us through the first week or so, which was nicely topped off by one of my neighbours getting carted off by paramedics because of Covid. That was a wakeup call to the seriousness of the circumstances. I was suddenly a leper among friends. I’d been close and spoken to the guy quite a bit the weekend everyone moved in, so my flatmates were understandably nervous. Fearing the worst we waited to see if any of us would develop symptoms. The claustrophobia of the situation started to gnaw away at each of us, culminating in Mel losing the plot one night over dinner, screaming in a panic her worst fears which we all resonated with, but hadn’t voiced. She fled to her bedroom with Zac in pursuit, leaving the three of us to eat in deathly silence. We cuddled up on the couch and watched the fading light through the windows, trying to keep the conversation light-hearted as we aired those fears. With some wine and bangers to relax us, we got to that happy place, and when our couple returned sheepishly to the proceedings we were all cool, glad that worries had been aired and shared.

None of us got the bug so we relaxed, resuming our daily hour of outdoor activity. TBH I didn’t really care at that time whether I got it or not. My reasoning was if I did get it I would develop antibodies so I’d be OK going forward. I was also busy enough the time passed quickly. We’d agreed we would front-load the work and capitalise on our forced enclosure. I think in the first week I’d worked 80 hours, the second even more. With nothing else to do (as in go nowhere), it seemed like the best thing. Zac took the same approach, although Mel was in two minds… while she didn’t want him working so much, she was enjoying the praise she was receiving for her project running ahead of schedule. At the end of our self-imposed isolation, and as a celebration of not being infected, we hit the town for a night out. With everything closed no decisions had to be made for a venue, so we stuffed our backpacks with goodies and walked into Soho. The streets were void of everything, save a few people enticed by the emptiness, even those sad bikes left behind because of lost keys or stolen wheels appeared to have been removed. We dropped Fairy’s and/or Special K, smoked up and drank leisurely as we roamed the streets reminiscing over the venues we passed. Retelling past escapades at certain locations as we slowly ascended the summit of alternative reality. As the evening progressed I felt more like we were in some lab experiment and were mice trying to find the piece of cheese. I had a moment of terror when I started imagining too much, about a huge hand coming across the sky to pick us up. It was short-lived and the only truly wobbly moment of the night. Soho became China Town, then Mayfair, Hyde Park, Buckingham Palace, Mayfair, Regent’s Park, Primrose Hill, Hampstead, Finsbury Park, Highbury and home. We were separated for a while, I have no idea how long, or if that actually happened but I remember it being just me and Lexi. Could’ve been 10 mins or an hour, I was oblivious, I just remember the others not being around and trying to locate them. I don’t even remember finding them, but realised they were back with us as we were climbing the fence to the Heath. We took the last of our gear on top of Parliament Hill (apparent highest point in London) admiring our contagion town as the sun came up. The last bottle of red was cracked and we swigged and toasted the morning. Once the sun cleared the horizon we were off again, this time with the purpose for home and recharged with the last of the goodies. It was by far the longest leg of the journey, on weary legs, our reserves depleting rapidly. By the time we hit Finsbury Park the drugs had worn. Conversation was reduced to simple questions, nods and grunts. There were people around, mainly runners and dog walkers, but a dedicated bunch was loitering around the Lidl (supermarket) as we exited the park. From there to home there was no talk whatsoever, it was just survival mode and everyone dealt with it solitarily. At home I made the best cup of tea I think I’ve ever had, strong and loaded with sugar, not something I usually take, but it helped. I showered for an age, cleansing the grime off my body, the sins of the night draining down the plug. No one was around so I took myself off to the park in the baking heat, passed out, the sun’s rays purging the remaining toxins from my body. I slept nearly the whole day. A night like that, wandering the empty streets of London may never happen again and I’m so happy we did it.

Weeks turned into a month. The project came to a natural break. market research, evaluation and QA blah-di-blah blah. The monotony still hadn’t set in, yet, and with the new freedom of no work we set about having some fun and enjoying the time on our hands.

Eating and drinking can take up a substantial part of the day, especially when you’re making elaborate feasts for every sitting. No sooner is breakfast finished and it’s time to start making lunch, always a 2-course affair of either entree-main, main-dessert, entree-dessert or if you were feeling really piggy, go fo all three. We all took turns to make our favourite meals, our signature dishes and ingenious ways to not waste any food. A month of this and I started seeing the signs of the reduced activity (when you can see it in the mirror, it’s already gone too far), so engaged myself in some cardio fitness routines and yoga with squirrel to keep the extra weight in check, I also began a running regime on the empty city streets. My neighbour recovered and returned, his gaunt grey face told a story of horror and had me reconsider my previous hope of contracting the virus. We sent them up a care package of some squash risotto and chablis. They were thankful, we made friends, they allowed us access to their roof terrace. Nice! This provided valuable additional space to hang out in because despite it’s cavernous open plan lounge/diner/kitchen/study, the walls in my place appeared just a tad closer each day. Our neighbours above, Shirley and Raymond, were/are a lovely couple, who fawned over us a little whenever we were on the terrace together. Inquisitive of our lives they asked lots of questions, posed some interesting ones for us and generally provided a good sounding board on the navigation of life. I would say they’re 50/60-ish, he’s in ‘finance’, she’s in the charitable sector (i.e. works for free to offset her fella’s evil deeds). Regardless of their ethical/non-ethical careers they are great neighbours and we are forever thankful for the use of their roof for the fresh air and sunbaking, the latter in full swing as the heat dialled up.

When the first wave of food ran out we ran sortie’s to the local Waitrose and Tesco for a re-stock, no alcohol at this pit-stop. Queuing for shop entry was a novel thing at first, it then became a ball-ache, now it’s non-existent, but I prefer this over the crowded aisles and stress-fueled shoppers. With the paranoid in society stockpiling essentials, we had to think on our feet a little more and buy basically anything which may constitute collaborative ingredients for a meal. The killer missing item for me was bread. I need a loaf in my kitchen at all times, it's my go-to snack with PB, and I generally try to keep a freezer-loaf as a back-up. But all that was left on the shelves of my local supermarkets were nasty paste-y white bread. Don’t get me wrong I will eat white bread, usually wrapped around a fried egg, some sausages and dripping with ketchup and Tabasco, but I can’t eat it every day, and we shouldn’t either. I found a local baker in Hoxton and bought a 20kg bag of flour and a tub of yeast with a plan to bake bread every day. This was a therapeutic, enjoyable start to the day, I felt so fucking righteous and wholesome. A week later I bought a bread maker off eBay, it made way more sense. I woke up to the smell of freshly baked bread every morning! The drawback here, it was small, so we had to make 2, sometimes 3 loaves, but one was generally enough to see out breakfast.

Work came back for a week-long sprint, I thrashed my side of this out in three 15 hour stints. Zac paced it out for the week, keeping in sync with his missus. We were all starting to disappear into ourselves a little each day. FaceTime, Zoom and Hang-outs became my good friends, bringing mates to me through the ether. I spent hours buried in my laptop, with a compulsion to connect with those in my life from afar. Nic and Luce were not doing so well, from an emotional perspective, and Kashie had fucked off back to Slavwegia as events were unfolding, and left them to it. Neither could get home or out of town and things were getting scary in New York. The landlord has frozen the rent ‘until a time which is convenient for regular payments to resume’, which was a very nice gesture indeed. That has taken the sting out of the situation for them. Harv had gone upstate, as had Jase and co. and remained living in a sense of normality. Friends in Asia were seeing a clearing through the trees, coming out the other side, there was hope. I even messaged my ex, just to make sure she was OK, which she's not, and she started to blame me for it. I took a few of her cutting remarks without reply because there's a bit of guilt with me so I felt I deserved it, but her continued little digs at me through our chat just pissed me off so I ended the call politely abrupt, wishing I'd never bothered. I spent the rest of the night stewing about her in moody silence, pretending to read while my flatmates played Monotony. My thoughts took me to the mystery girl of my past. Where was she, who was she, was she OK? why do I think and dream about her so much? it's doing my fucking head in. I find myself scanning for her whenever I'm out, which is harder now that face masks are in use, and plausibly a good thing to dissuade me from the madness of it.

Katje busied herself by running dance/yoga/cardio classes from our dining room via zoom, which seemed to take up a large chunk of her day. Sometimes Lexi would join in but mostly she was reading or binge-watching something. The fitness instalments provided a pleasant distraction from work, watching the girls in their ever-smaller clothing getting sweaty and flushed. I upped my running game as the effort reduced, pushing myself to pace a little more each day, capitalising on the time and solitude it afforded me. I also used the runs to meet up somewhere central with friends across town, have a distanced chat before continuing home. It was on one of these runs, as I finished at the river and stretched out in front of that Tate, I had a spark of an idea for a great campaign. I ran home through the deserted city streets, thinking, and the further I got the more I knew my idea was a winner, runners runners everywhere. I pitched it to a friend who‘s in marketing at Adidas and he liked the idea but needed something more visual to float it around their team. There would be legwork to do, excuse the pun, but with a fresh idea, I was game for it. I tapped up some of my new links on Strava then looked at the flybys on my longer runs into town to see who I’d been passing, looking for people who liked to run long and came from outta town into the contagion zone. Once I’d identified an array of potentials I roughed out a storyboard, sent it off and sat back to wait. The reply wasn’t long in coming, it was a yes!! At least it was something to take my mind off the real work.

I connected with all of my candidates then sent them each a message asking if they were interested in my proposal and if they were could we speak. I had 19 candidates, including me, and after my calls, it went down to 16. It was simple, run into central London and plan to run every street from the middle out, over however many runs we did through lockdown, tag the runs and post them on social. The first weeks running would give me the basics for a teaser video that would attract more runners and build a following, then a challenge posted on Strava for anyone to partake in. Each km run would attract a donation from Adidas to a charity. Running gear would be fronted to the challenge team so the brand would be visible in all shots, and their generosity extended to 2 pairs of runners, 3 pairs each of leggings, shorts, long and short-sleeve tops, masks and a phone pouch arm-band thingy. The first run was planned so we all met in Golden Square late morning, not too early to start and close enough to lunch so we could give everyone a drink and snack. It was without a doubt one of the weirdest lunches I’ve had when straight, all strangers, apart from me and the 2 girls, swapping our stories over energy drinks and bars for about an hour or so. We bid farewell and made our journey’s back to our respective pods. The girls provided some assistance throughout the project duration, which was about 5 weeks; choosing photos, involving themselves in some of the video editing and compiling all the routes from the trackers so we knew what roads had and hadn’t been covered.

The girls also got a crash course in digital marketing and how some of it works, which they were astounded by. Lexi understood but Katje was in disbelief, even with Zac and Mel chipping in, so I made her watch the Unexplained Truth on Netflix, that Cambridge Analytica doco thing. Explained what I know of facebook and how I’ve used it, Adwords, insta, blah blah blah, pointed her to a myriad of resources and explained how everything you see is targeted. Everything. She’s now a little paranoid, maybe too much, but it’ll subside. She’s all over facebook and insta for work reasons so kinda knows what goes on, but not to the depths the 3 of us were telling her. She said we were evil. On that note, I will pull on my cloak of darkness and bid you farewell.

Later Gators

[speaknvw]

reputation - album review

insp. by outofthewoods, i’m gonna do a full review of the album during my first time listening to it :) even tho no one’s gonna read this

i’m lowkey comparing it to red because of the amount of people from secret sessions saying it’s better than red and red has been my favorite since well.. 2012

and i’m gonna include my rankings at the end

…READY FOR IT

(i think this only fits as the first track because i don’t see where else it would fit in with the album)

personally only like the chorus of this song but i 100% stan the music video of course and my WIG flew //

END GAME

BITHC DFJSJKFHD i personally love taylor’s parts and i of course love ed’s parts although this is quite a contrast to everything has changed, but nonetheless i love the beat and i love the concept of the song.

“i swear i don’t love drama, it loves me” my WIG MF FLEW MISS SWIFT.

//

I DID SOMETHING BAD

“if a man talks shit then i owe him nothing” OH YES HONEY. THDJSHVJKSDC THIS SONG IS GIVING ME GOOSEBUMPS SIS THE CHORUS HAS ME QUAKING ALL THE WAY TO PLUTO.

THE BEAT DROP DURING THE CHORUS GIVES ME EVEN MORE GOOSEBUMPS EVERYTIME IT PLAYS IF THATS EVEN POSSIBLE DJFSJDK

THIS IS 100% ON MY TOP 5 FOR BOPS. I’D BOP TO THIS EVERYDAY. AND THE BRIDGE EHFSFJEHUKJK

//

DON’T BLAME ME

“don’t blame me love made me crazy” honey… it made all of us crazy

idk for some reason the lyrics remind me of bey? i’m not really sure why

i ADORE HER VOICE IN THIS SONG.

i’m not really sure how i really overall feel about this song but i love the vocals in this song and i feel if i listened more closely to the lyric’s i could stan it more

//

DELICATE

the beginning. omg. imogen vibes??? yes. 

THE MF BEAT HSJKHEUWHERENJWKEK

OMGFDJKFS THE PRE-CHORUS FCUK ME???? DEADASS BYE

ISN’T IT DELICATE

“stay here i don’t wanna share” sdjfsdfhjuhfn i wanna cry because of that

“I PRETEND YOU’RE MINE ALL THE DAMN TIME” THAT’S THR BIGGEST MOOD KFJSKND

this song is def calmer than the rest of these songs

//

LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO

i remember when this dropped and how shook i was

and i remember shaking when the chorus came on bC JDSKFK

I CAN ALREADY TELL THIS IS GONNA HAVE SOME BOMB ASS CHOREO ON TOUR

i can def see why this was chosen to be the first/comeback single because of what the concept of the song is (i mean i think everyone does)

and from this song i was kinda expecting an album about well.. her reputation.. i guess?? but after the other two singles i wasn’t too sure what was coming BUT

NONETHELESS i adore this song and it honestly feels a little short in comparison to the rest

//

SO IT GOES…

in the beginning i was a little iffy about the chorus but i love the verses.

“i make all your grey days clear” “I’m so chill but you make me jealous”

“but I got your heart skipping when i’m gone”

WOW MISS SWIFT REALLY MADE MY WIG FLY WITH THESE LINES. NGL.

but listening to these lyrics help realize how the chorus fits in

side note: when i first saw the track list i honestly thought of you are in love (which is my favorite song from 1989) and the verse where she says “and so it goes, you two are dancing in a snow globe round and round”)

//

GORGEOUS

i love the concept of this song but i don’t know if i LOVE it,, does that make any sense??

and i loved reading people’s posts on twitter/tumblr about their conspiracy theories of this song

and i relate to this song when i see ppl who r beautiful but i’m too much of a pussy to say shit to them

and i wish i knew why she chose this as a single

//

GETAWAY CAR

wow. just wow. THSEJFEHNRJRE THE FUKCJNGJBN BEGINNING OH MYOOGFDI I WANNA CRY

THIS SOBNG IS SO GOOD WOW

“i wanted to leave him, i needed a reason” 

THE FUCKING CHORUS I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT

I LOVE THE VIBES THIS SONG GIVES OFF

THE TYPE OF MUSIC ID LISTEN TO DURING A ROADTRIP TBH?? AND NOT JUST BC OF THE TITLE

but wow i love her voice in this song jsjfnejr it reminds me of something but i can’t put my finger on it

“there were sirens in the beat of your heart” oH MY GOD this line. 

THE BRIDGE WOW IM LITERALLY IN TEARS RIGHR NOW

THINK ABOUT THE WHERE PLACE YOU FIRST MET ME

NO NOTHING GOOD STARTS IN A GETAWAY CAR

//

KING OF MY HEART

i love the beginning fuckfjd<3 though i.. don’t exactly like the beat but i do like the lyrics and i love how she told the ppl at ss how each lyric is a diff stage of her relationship. i love how she did that.

the chorus reminds me of getaway car a bit

change my priorities wow

i don’t know i just don’t really connect w this song but i think some of the lyrics are cute and soft like old taylor :)

//

DANCING WITH OUR HANDS TIED

the piano oh?? THE BEAT OH???

JDSJDFSB THE LYRICS OH MY GOD

“deep blue but you painted me golden / oh and you held me close / ooh how was i to know” HSKJFWEH WOWOWWOOW

I HAD A BAD FEELING

QUEEN TAYLOR IS SHAKING ME

i loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us

i love.

//

DRESS

“they got no idea about me and you” wow you right.. we didn’t have any idea sis :( 

I LOVE HER VOICE IN THE BEGINNING BABY YES TAYLOR

only bought this dress so you could take it off

anyone thinks that they know us but they know nothing about all of this silence and patience panic and anticipation my hands are shaking from holding back from you

I honestly love how this song is about sex lmao

nonetheless i love the beat and feel of this song:)

AND THE BRIDGE TOOK MY BREATH AWAY. i would say wig flew but she took that during the first 3 seconds of end game

//

THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS

okay the beginning,, i thought it was an ad so imma be honest and say i don’t like the beginning

this song gives me the vibe of we are young by fun., is it just me?? idk but that’s what i thought of during the verses vs the chorus you know??

if only you weren’t so shady,, this is why we can’t have nice things

ALRIGHT I LOVE HOW SHE DEDICATES THAT PART OF THE SONG TO PEOPLE WHERE SHES LIKE:

HERE’S A TOAST TO MY REAL FRIENDS WHO DON’T CARE ABOUT THE HE SAID SHE SAID

AND HERE’S TO MY BAAABYY (i love the way she says baby in this song it’s deadass so adorable) HE AIN’T READING WHAT THEY CALL ME LATELY

AND HERE’S TO MY MAMA HAD TO LISTEN TO ALL THIS DRAMA

AND HERE’S TO YOU BECAUSE FORGIVENESS IS A NICE THING TO DO– HAHAHA I CAN’T EVEN SAY THAT WITH A STRAIGHT FACE

I LOVE IT. I STAN. 

this song is so cute tbh

//

CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT

alright alright alright,, the fourth single of rep. probably my favorite single.

i love the contrast from this is why we can’t have nice things

and this song is so cuteeee and i love how she stays calling him her baby,, it’s the cutest thing and makes my heart go [<3<3<3]

and i know i make the same mistakes every time bridges burn i never learn at least i did one thing right lmao that line lowkey broke my heart 

this is the type of song you listen to when you’re in love tbh it’s so cute and the lyrics r like old taylor and i love it

not because he owns me, but because he really knows me

LOVES ME LIKE IM BRAND NEW I adore that lyric

//

NEW YEAR’S DAY

this song is so cute wow. it’s so different from the rest of the album though and i feel like it’d be a deluxe song, but NONETHELESS IM IN LOVE WITH THIS SONG WOW

squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi

please don’t ever become a stranger whose laugh i can recognize anywhere

this song is deadass so cute oh my god i love how she shows her soft side in this song

HOLD ON TO THESE MEMORIES

that reminded me of long live oh my god i’m trying not to get emo ab that

CANDLE WAX AND POLAROIDS ON THE HARDWOOD FLOOR - YOU AND ME FOREVERMORE

this is the most og taylor swift song on the album and the type of song that captured my heart all those years ago and wow. i just love it.

//

overall i love this album more than i thought i would because,, well to be quite honest i kind of grew apart 1989 and thought this would just push me away further but it definitely did not. no, it’s not your typical taylor swift cheesy heartbreak songs, but it’s different and that’s what i love about it. is it better than red? once i get more into the lyrics and the concepts behind all of the songs i think i’ll determine my opinion on that.

one thing i really loved about this album is how it’s not just about her heartbreak and the hell and the pain she’s been through with the last relationship she was in (of course there’s that in this album but it’s so much more), it’s also about her well, reputation, and how she feels in her current one. i can tell how happy she is right now and i can already feel her smiles through the songs, the smiles she probably had during the recording of this album.

i love the change of style that came out of the 3 year hiatus

and now here’s my rankings (for now at least)

- getaway car

- i did something bad 

- delicate

- dress

- dancing with our hands tied

- new year’s day

- king of my heart 

- don’t blame me

- end game

- call it what you want

- gorgeous

- ready for it

- this is why we can’t have nice things

- so it goes

- look what you made me do

[my-happy-little-bean]

anotha tag thang

tagged by the lovely @phandana​, get ready to know more stuff about me that you probs wouldn’t care less about :P

rules : answer 30 questions and then tag 20 blogs you would like to know better!

1. nicknames: gabbie is actually a nickname, i call myself gabber, gabster if you are going for the super grade 6-cringe nickname :’)

2. gender: female

3. star sign: sagittarius

4. height : i should really figure this one out :P

5. time: 9:29 pm (est)

6. birthday: december 21st

7. favourite bands: muse, mcr, twenty one pilots, dash of radiohead every now and then (need to listen to more of ‘em), and others im sure

8. favourite solo artists: dodie, imma slide in harry styles (im undecided :P), and does bo burnham count im tired i don’t really remember the important ones :’)

9. song stuck in my head : “some kind of wonderful” from "beautiful: carole king musical” — god bless jessie mueller

10. last movie i watched: not too sure...it might’ve been la la land with her💕 now that i think of it :P (also because i refuse to put “the emoji movie” :”D)

11. last show i watched: friends probably, lol

12. when did i create my blog: 2015-ish? maybe 2016?

13. what do i post : updates no one cares about and funny things, along with a sprinkle of cute animals. then of course, i reblog tons of dan/phil and thomas sanders and dodie clark and other youtubers of lesser importance (just kidding of course) (also if anyone else posts thomas sanders stuff pls tell me because i would really like more thomas and sander sides on my dash let’s be honest)

14. last thing i googled: star signs because i blanked on #3, lol

15. do you have any other blogs: don’t have the dedication

16. do you get asks : not really, tbh, im lonely pls send me stuff but dat’s alright, they’re slowly coming along

17. why did you choose your url: i go by tiredofbeingnice pretty much anywhere, and i hate being nice all the time #imsoedgy

18. following: 306 apparently (again, have been on a sander sides-blog following spree :P)

19. followers: 149, which is kind of surprising, heh :P

20. favourite colours: pink/blue

21. average hours of sleep: 6-8, depending on what kind of night it is (and whether or not im crying lololololol)

22. lucky number: i like the number 6 does that count

23. instruments: played the recorder in grade 4, can kinda play the clarinet, and kinda play the ukulele

24. what i am wearing: a baggy grey shirt that says “roxy surf california” in big pink colours, shorts that are blue/orange and stuff, and brown slippers, heh

25. how many blankets i sleep with: one, sometimes 0 if i am kicking ‘em off, lol

26. dream job : perhaps to be a therapist. that’d be nice :)

27. dream trip: it’d be cool to go to tokyo im not too sure i am too tense to finish this thing now oh my god 

28. favourite food: potatoes, steak, chicken wings, ice cream all the such :P

29. nationality: filipino/canadian 

30. favourite song now:  "dead girl walking” from heathers or “meant to be yours” bAM BAM BAM

anyone who wants to do this can — i am kind of a bit too tense to tag specifics :’)

[ikonmenow]

(◐ o ◑ ) GET TO KNOW ME TAG  (◐ o ◑ )

RULES: ANSWER THE QUESTIONS IN A NEW POST AND TAG 20 BLOGS YOU WOULD LIKE TO GET TO KNOW BETTER.

TAGGED BY: @to-move-on-means-to-grow, thank you- andireadyourstoo c:

NICKNAME: mostly my close friends call me panda- other than that just my first name or my last name or just add some more letters to my realshort name just to make it real long e u e;; i’m the one who gives out nicknames for my friends tbh ^^’

GENDER: female

STAR SIGN: capricorn

HEIGHT: 159cm- yeah, so tall, i know haha

TIME RIGHT NOW: 05:40PM // im re reading this cause i may have missed a question and it is currently 07:12PM lol i’m so slow-

LAST THING GOOGLED: uh- how to write capricorn in english tbh e u e; aye the struggles of being dumb-

FAVORITE BANDS: (no particular order tbh and this is going to be a mess, just warning because there’s going to be other than korean bands tbh) iKON, blackpink, d.a.m.a., bts, k.a.r.d., twice, monsta x, got7, gnr, angerme, s/milage (ermg i miss this band so much-)  and i don’t remember any other atm-

FAVORITE SOLO ARTISTS: shawn mendes, selena gomez, gray, loco, g-dragon, crush, lydia, tablo, agir, ntk, enrique iglesias, rui veloso, lou bega,  i think that’s about it? i mean- i listen to a lot of artists so- e u e; idk my playlist is all over the place tbh-

SONG STUCK IN YOUR HEAD: bts - i need u, there’s something about this song that i can’t get over tbh-

LAST MOVIE WATCHED: the beauty and the beast

LAST TV SHOW WATCHED: uh- ouro verde lol-

WHEN DID YOU CREATE YOUR BLOG: damn- lemme check. may 2016. aye

WHAT KIND OF STUFF DO YOU POST: uhm- ikon related stuff as in fanwritten? idk how to label my own work, shame on me

WHEN DID YOUR BLOG REACH IT’S PEAK: oh- uh- well... by summer, i believe? 

DO YOU HAVE ANY OTHER BLOGS: yes i do, apart from my personal- that tbh is just me being me- i got one dedicated to blackpink and another one for kpop in general

DO YOU GET ASKS REGULARLY: yes i do and omg i’m so thankful for each end every one of you guys ; n ; thank you so much < 3 i’ll try to get to you all real soon-

WHY YOU CHOSE YOUR URL: well, because since this blog is ikon related, i found it a kinda catchy name?

FOLLOWING: 707 - yeah i know, i’m lame but i gotta look for blogs and i have little time-

POSTS: oh damn- now how to i see this? uh- hold on imma try to discover tbh. dumb me found it- 1337

HOGWARTS HOUSE: griffindor, smth real funny- i was answering this question and my dad walks in with one of harry potter’s books /throws sarang at my dad tbh-

POKEMON TEAM: uh- pikachu? /slapped so hard/ jkjk- i have no idea. i watched this when i was a kid but eh- /lowkey runs to my friends and asks them about this tbh-

FAVORITE COLOURS: blue and purple are my favorite colors < 3 tho i like black and the other colors too e u e;; mylifeissomessybecauseofthistbh-

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: oh...nice question...i have no idea. it really deppends on what i have to do. but if i sleep more than what i’m supposed - let’s say 7 to 8 hours - i get real lazy and there goes my productivity-

LUCKY NUMBERS: 7, 13 and 21 or at least i like to believe so-

FAVORITE CHARACTERS: here goes dumb me again trying hard to remember charas- uh- does edward elric count? cause if it doesn’t imma cry- jk but uh- just fma’s charas tbh /is tempted to see fma all over again; slapped

WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW: i read what are you hearing and i was about to say kard e u e; damn eyes. uh it’s like a light grey sweatshirt and some sport pants that are real comfortable and my cute bunny pink socks with some circles that look like snow- too much detail? sorry-

HOW MANY BLANKETS DO YOU SLEEP WITH: 3 e u e; that’s how cold i feel- tho i love cold tbh- and i’d sleep with more if i could-

DREAM JOB: nurse o/ imma make this happen /flips hair/ or dancer tbh- cause ermg- or composer omg- no- stop brain- idk i just have so many things i can be  e u e;;;

DREAM TRIP: i want to travel around the world tbh- but some places i really would like to visit would be italy, los angeles, argentina, egypt, australia and korea

ugh- hai? idk who to tag cause i’m an awkward potato? so like- i’m just gonna tag.... e u e; @cele6i cause- haaai xD and ermg- idk who to tag /crying in spanish tbh. do tag me if you answer this, i will gladly read yours < 3 i hope you guys had fun tbh c: eventhoyourejustreadingaboutdumbme eue;; but yeah. /throws sarang at everyone.