#a little silly billy bc my friend was showing me ss’s of a renkaza fic she was reading and thr angst was angsting

[xxlady-lunaxx]

it really shouldn’t have happened—this thing kyojuro had created. with akaza. and sometimes, he truly did regret it. wish he had never met him. wish that none of this had happened, so he wouldn’t have to discern if the guilt that churned in his stomach was from the betrayal towards the corps or towards akaza, burning him with the knowledge that he would need to commit seppuku if he was found out and the thoughts that told him to just kill akaza. but sometimes, he couldn’t help the smile that formed when he saw akaza. finding a comfortable nook in a large boulder, or a steady branch in a tree and settling there beside akaza, holding him close. he liked the intricacy of akaza’s face, the lilt in his voice that differentiated his tone meant for kyojuro than to anyone else, the curve of his hips that allowed kyojuro to easily pull him close by the waist. he liked holding him close, akaza’s face buried in his hair as they spoke quietly in the midst of the night, whispered words held for only one another. he loved catching the smiles akaza flashed his way before he left, he loved chaste kisses after difficult missions, he loved the feel of akaza’s fingers raking through his hair, he loved this thing he had made with akaza. he shouldn’t. but he would never ask for anyone else.