#a line i wanted to say but couldnt: erica made out w/ jesse to show she's bad now & will break the rules of feminism a la gretchen wieners

[discocandles]

ok but thinking about the series where Gord is the final boy instead of jesse is a bit of a mindbender and im gnawing on it. I wonder how much Gord really knew about jesse's plans. like rory didn't know jack shit, tho he was w/ them for 2 days max but all he knew of the plan was cubule animus(thats misspelt but eh). and the movie writing loved to say "ooo jesse is a secretive lil bitchboy, even to his allies." post the party scene all we know is that jesse leads some vampire group posing as theater kids and hes got consent issues with his ex.

so maybe as the last vamp standing(he's a final boy) who didn't know all he should about the weapon with like 63 fangirls' souls trapped inside and mistakenly opens it too early (bc jesse had it covered so he didnt talk about it) and "dies" like jesse does in the movie or maybe you could just copy and paste the events(either way its a win, even though ethan and benny didn't really do that much). then he gets revived in 3 geeks and a demon, and after the initial "wtf?" Gord would be like "ok. 2 options. get revenge or fuck off. ill just get a little revenge on the geek from the harvesting and then skip town.

He meets Erica(that "so you're back >:]" bit makes more sense for the guy erica was visibly into than the guy she dated to spite sarah). I don't think Gord hypnotizing her would make sense. He'd just try to see what the geeks are doing so he can avenge jesse and fuck off for seattle or some shit(hes not gonna deal with the Vampire Council bs).

The fang gang knows he's back. Sarah sees him at night and attacks to which Gord's like "damn, you're still alive as a halfling. that's wack. you should fix that at some point." and Ethan gets a vision from our fave possession box(+ the sarah drinks human blood vision). but they don't know if he actually has a plan given last time he was just completing jesse's plan, maybe hell try again?

but nah his plan is basically the same as jesse's in revamped. cast curse of vampirism on seer geek and then be like "your problem now. maybe you two can combine your problems and make a solution from it." then leave. Erica dumps him because he chucks sarah into the lockers or something "and she's like "nah nobody throws her around on my watch even if theyre hot."

then in the finale, ethan basically calls Gord like "hey can you help us?" "ugh, with what?" "the lucifractor" "Shit, fine yeah give me like an hour to get back there." "ok thanks."

when sarah and benny question his intentions: listen fucking up the plans for the guy who kept Jesse from his coven while they were getting murdered is better vengeance than anything for you freaks. and even tho jesse was shit at explaining plans, he did know how to talk about his own sob stories in great detail. plus im the best and only option you have.

he should be allowed to punch Stern in the face at least once methinks.

im so sad they never brought back gord. where did he go. im not accepting that hes dead.