#a friend once started braiding my hair bec she was board and zoned out and then apologised prefusly and Im like!!!

[dyslexic-mess]

I need people to understand that I'm not a very physically affectionate person bec I don't have a good understanding of when it's appropriate to be.

Like, yes, the nerospicy tendency to not like my personal bubble invaded but that applies to strangers and mild acquaintances. My friends?

The instinct is to actually be VERY touchy. I wanna hold there hand, I wanna stroke there hair and pat there head and bump there sholder and tap them softly on the way past and rest my forehead against there's when there sad and kiss them on there temple when I mean what I say and rub there back when there in distress and hug them when there exited and-!!!

The problem is, I have trouble understanding when I'm close enough to someone to be that touchy. I don't understand what's appropriate and which level of friendship. Friendship is such a loosely defined and complex relationship that I just don't know and I don't wanna make anyone uncomfortable so I just don't.

Its why people get so confused when they see me with family because I just let my impulse take over because there my family, and I know for sure it's okay. I'm forever ruffling my sister hair and pokeing my brother on the way past and brushing my shoulder against my mums and resting my head on my dad's sholder and holding my nanas hand and kissing my aunty on the top of her head. That's how I was raised and I gotta correl that around other people bec I just have no idea when it's okay to be like that.

Unfortunately, like with most nerodivergent tendencys, it means I tend to go to far the other way. People just assume I don't like contact and I love them for trying to recpect my boundaries but actually you can!! Please do!! I just have no idea how to emote it