#a bunch of silly gifs for my entertainment lol

[weirdmageddon]

long mediation on jade and dave’s relationship - part 2

part 1 is here

this part is essentially about dave and jade’s personalities, their basic dynamic, and how it works. and addressing some things ive seen said about dave in moments that people remove from context because they dont weigh these contexts and prior ones. if you want a post that goes into dave’s attitude towards jade (conclusion: he cares about her a lot) here it is

part 2: switcheroo + misconceptions about dave's role in dave and jade's relationship

something interesting i realized while writing this is the thing about grimbark jade is that she is no nonsense when her normal self is all about nonsense and entertaining silly things because she can see the merit in them. in fact she is always having a chuckle caused by dave's sense of humor and im sure dave got used to interacting with jade like that so wtf with grimbark jade

EB: so i think i have to get TG to use his copy to save her! EB: but that jackass won't shut up and stop rapping and stuff. GG: hahaha GG: he is so silly! (p.293)

TG: snows a big chilly carpet of nobody gives a shit TG: like old man winter spread around his nasty mayonnaise and turned the landscape into his personal asshole sandwich GG: eww dave no TG: when i look around all i see is the miles of unharnessed snowmen im just too damn cool to build GG: no this is so lame GG: i am hearing an insane and stupid guy say stupid idiot things while wearing dumb sunglasses for lame morons! TG: whoa jade with the fucking haymaker TG: i need to go look for my teeth on the canvas as soon as shit stops spinning and there stops being like ten of you GG: heheheh GG: why dont we play in the snow later (p.3024)

GG: i cant get over how tiny this thing is! GG: its so cute GG: so the baby frogs show up on this pad here? GA: Yes GG: i cant wait to try it GA: What Are You Laughing At There GG: oh GG: lol GG: dave just has a lot of funny stuff to say about all this GA: What Is He Saying GG: oh you know, a bunch of silly stuff GG: theres too much to copy/paste! GA: Hmm GG: here ill save it all to a file and send it to you -- gardenGnostic [GG] sent grimAuxiliatrix [GA] the file "daveisafunnyguy.txt" -- GA: Okay Im Laughing Pretty Hard At All That GG: hahaha (p.3312)

JADE: *snicker* JOHN: what? JADE: nothing JOHN: is someone messaging you through the game? JADE: hehe JOHN: who is it? JADE: pffff! JOHN: dammit, jade... JADE: its davesprite, hes playing too JOHN: oh. JOHN: don't tell him any of our strategies. he is the enemy! JADE: we have strategies? JOHN: um... JOHN: ok, first, tell him we have strategies. then, don't tell him them. JADE: hahahahahahaha JOHN: oh god. JOHN: what is it now? JADE: did you know... JADE: davesprite is a funny guy? JOHN: meh, he's alright i guess. JOHN: i give most of his jokes a passing grade. sometimes as high as a solid b+! JADE: i just told him you said that JADE: davesprite says to tell you "youre basically welcome for being born 14 years ago and 1 year ago you ungrateful douche" JOHN: oh, like him taking credit for my existence isn't so old by now! (p.4732)

in a way i feel like their roles parallel dave and jade in the earlier acts from homestuck, but inverted (and twisted/not as nice cause grimbark jade is under nefarious influences)

dave approaches the world from a highly pragmatic position. his ego (in the purely psychoanalytical sense) that he holds himself to, shows to the world, and what he tends to reason through is one that’s about relaxed competence. he’s critical of unreasonable actions and takes it upon himself to guide others into being more efficient in practical, realistic ways. he sees that jade struggles in these initially but she readily accepts his help, which is more than glad to provide.

this doesn���t say anything bad about jade harley. this doesn’t make her stupid, or in need the saving from a knight in shining armor nor does it make dave condescending towards her. it’s information that he is able to provide and that she appreciates and trusts his assistance with while she sees through the things that she prioritizes like helping others with matters of hidden opportunities / the big picture and interpersonal needs which are completely out of dave’s league, something he highly respects but doesnt feel its his greatest asset towards other people like jade does. jade is very into science and gadgetry, but remember that she relies heavily on her sharp intuition rather than straight up pragmatism like dave would. jade really is exceptional and multitalented but she doesn’t know how she does the things she does half the time!

(p.790)

even though dave acknowledges this it doesn’t really bother him

TG: hey TG: oh TG: youre asleep again arent you TG: or do you even know if you are TG: i still dont know how that works TG: its like nothing means anything TG: its so cool getting hella chumped by your coquettish damn riddles all the time TG: i dont know why i believe anything you say im like the grand marshal of gross chumpage (p.829)

GG: i want to tell him happy birthday and ask him about his birthday package! TG: oh yeah TG: i was being sort of cagey and told him to check the mail cause i was wondering if mine came yet GG: i think it did! TG: yeah? GG: and i think mine came too TG: so uh TG: i guess you want to know if he likes it or something? GG: no!!!!!!! GG: he will not open it GG: he will lose it!!! TG: oh TG: uh TG: wow sorry to hear that i guess? GG: no its good actually! GG: because he will find it again later when he really needs it GG: which of course is why i sent it in the first place! TG: see like TG: i never get how you know these things GG: i dont know GG: i just know that i know! TG: hmm alright (p.382)

TT: Jade is connected with you? TT: Where did she get the discs? TG: i dont know how does she do any of the loopy batshit nonsense she does (p.1401)

but because she’s gotten by on intuition and her dreams for most things, she’s not as adapted to the rationale behind actions. dave can sense her struggling and wants to help because it’s basically his mission for everyone, not just jade. but that’s the information that jade is glad to be led by and continues to unconsciously prompt him with. she encourages his practical ways and doesn’t tell him to fuck off or just straight up ignore his advice which dave interprets as his strengths being needed by someone else

GG: dave! GG: are you busy? GG: i dont have much time! GG: i am about to make my entry item, and its a little confusing GG: i think the more players we add, the trickier they are to... um...... GG: activate! GG: like yours was GG: i figured we could brainstorm about it, while john fusses with the kernel GG: helloooooo? TG: nak nak nak GG: :o (p.2907)

TG: yeah honestly i figured wed have to do something like this TG: so i guess here we are doing it GG: doing what?? TG: well youre my server player remember GG: yes TG: i need you to deploy something first TG: in my apartment TG: in a few hours ill go back there and we can continue this GG: oh jeez, a few hours???? -- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] -- -- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] -- TG: yeah TG: as in a few seconds TG: im back at my place now GG: fastest hours :o TG: yeah TG: now TG: deploy the intellibeam laserstation GG: but that costs so much grist!!! TG: no it costs practically nothing TG: check out how much ive got GG: omg... GG: what does this thing do? TG: its mostly pretty stupid and useless TG: but itll come in handy here TG: it reads captcha codes GG: on the back of cards? TG: yeah GG: but GG: we can already read those! TG: some are too garbled and complicated TG: the human eye cant decipher them TG: needs sophisticated scanning technology TG: and artificial intelligence to figure it out GG: hmm GG: but isnt the whole point of captchas that only humans can read them? GG: and not robots??? TG: yeah well TG: thats why this is so dumb (p.3025 / 3026)

TG: thisll be the disc i use for your connection TG: while the original will stay bound to roses connection GG: so you will be the server for BOTH us ladies??? GG: you just keep getting smoother, i cant handle all this smoothness TG: well technically TG: i will be your server TG: and past me will stay as roses server TG: which is to say present me will TG: the one in the black suit GG: ohh... GG: i guess that makes sense TG: he can keep managing her for a while TG: until she sorta checks out soon and becomes totally useless TG: then he can start hopping around time like i did TG: make a ton of money and stuff TG: eventually become me TG: and become your server player GG: ok i think i understand that! TG: yeah see its not hard to get the hang of TG: in the meantime ill kind of loiter around this timeframe to help you out for a while GG: yessss thanks dave <3

TG: im just going to cut right to the chase and upgrade your alchemiter so you can avoid a lot of bullshit TG: ill give you some codes and you can punch cards and slip em into jumper blocks GG: yaaaaaaaaaaaay! (p.3030 - 3032)

jade has strengths that dave has weaknesses in too, which dave himself points out!!!

TG: ok so TG: the egg is now in a nest made of shitty swords and soft puppet ass TG: please advise GG: i think your sprite wants to hatch it! GG: awww TG: do you think thatll take more than four hours GG: hmm... GG: i dont know it looks like its pretty warm where you are TG: its hot as the sizzle side of the steak GG: maybe not too long then???? GG: i guess we'll find out! TG: maybe i should try to get it back TG: and put it in the microwave GG: :( (p.1507)

dave assumed the egg needed to be heated to break and allow him to enter the game, so his course of action is to go up there and get it himself and use whatever means are at his disposal. that is a logical, straightforward thing to do. he doesnt rely on uncertainty and blind trust that things will just work out when he has the ability to take action in a way that makes sense; that’s jade’s thing. but it turns out jade’s intuition for how to solve dave’s entry puzzle was right! it was actually a test of patience. he later says this to jade

GG: you guys are all so much better than me, i feel sooooo lame TG: we all start out somewhere TG: remember how i was scrambling up that tower to get that egg like an idiot TG: what the hell was i doing TG: i was like goddamn pooh bear in a tree reaching up his fat fuckin pooh paw for some mother fuckin honey GG: heehee TG: so even though im awesome now at one point i was plausibly likened to an autistic stuffed animal TG: and you even knew what to do TG: you told me how it worked all christopher robinning my ignorant ass about that egg TG: but i was all like IM A LITTLE BLACK RAIN CLOUD BITCH WATCH ME CLIMB TG: so maybe youre startin out with more sense than me GG: maaaybe GG: :) (p.3025)

hes pretty much like jade's hypeman but in his own sort of lowkey way and is actually sweetly reassuring to her. this includes davesprite btw

GG: those stupid things are impossible to kill :( TG: no you can kill them TG: youll get better dont worry (p.3024)

GG: hmmmm... GG: i dont know if i get that but ok! TG: well yeah TG: my thing is time yours is space TG: pretty different things TG: you GET things about space i dont TG: or you will GG: i will? TG: yup (p.3024)

DAVESPRITE: as a sprite im supposed to help him with his quest JADESPRITE: oh yeah JADESPRITE: im supposed to help jade too, but...... JADESPRITE: *sniffle* DAVESPRITE: shes doing alright dont worry about it JADESPRITE: ok, ill try... JADESPRITE: shes a lot more brave than me i think JADESPRITE: she brought me back thinking i could help her and all i did was disappoint her and everyone else JADESPRITE: you came back as a sprite and youre managing to do important things... JADESPRITE: but i just feel so scared and helpless DAVESPRITE: sounds like you came back because jade made the decision for you DAVESPRITE: i made the decision to come back myself maybe itd be different if you had the same chance JADESPRITE: i dont know if i would have if i had the chance JADESPRITE: but i would like to not feel so useless to everybody DAVESPRITE: i think everyones on top of this DAVESPRITE: theres not much for us to do anymore (p.3927)

DAVESPRITE: so jade must have done something right DAVESPRITE: to wake her up and get the forge going DAVESPRITE: dont know what she did though JADESPRITE: probably something amazing JADESPRITE: she is still working so hard to help everyone JADESPRITE: i guess i used to be that way... JADESPRITE: but ive completely forgotten how DAVESPRITE: are you sure (p.3945)

JADESPRITE: it reminds me of when i died JADESPRITE: and i was trying to wake john up JADESPRITE: i was scared then too JADESPRITE: but i didnt let the fear stop me from trying to save him DAVESPRITE: what would you want to do DAVESPRITE: if you werent scared JADESPRITE: i have no idea JADESPRITE: i guess try to help JADESPRITE: what is there to do? DAVESPRITE: well DAVESPRITE: i was going to bring this sword to dave JADESPRITE: oh noo JADESPRITE: does that mean youre going to leave? DAVESPRITE: no DAVESPRITE: i was gonna say DAVESPRITE: im not in any shape for more adventuring DAVESPRITE: i figure this is probably my last stop JADESPRITE: :( DAVESPRITE: but maybe this is a way you can help JADESPRITE: you mean... JADESPRITE: that i should give him the sword? DAVESPRITE: if you want JADESPRITE: but i dont want to leave you here either DAVESPRITE: maybe you dont have to actually go anywhere DAVESPRITE: you oughta have a lot of special powers remember DAVESPRITE: because of ascending to doghood JADESPRITE: oh yeah! DAVESPRITE: try doing your spacey thing DAVESPRITE: i mean not to sound condescending or anything but its got to be like borderline omnipotence pretty much DAVESPRITE: just put your mind to it (p.3946)

knowing all of this about dave and jade’s personalities and how they work together, i’ve see people get on dave’s case about making jade slap herself in the face after she put the dead bird into his kernelsprite while he was preoccupied with taking a leak

dave freaks the hell out when he realizes she’s asleep; he needs to wake her up because she needs to help him get into the game while requires pragmatism and reasonable actions so that he’s not crushed to death by an imminent meteor. or falling plumbing fixtures. the goal wasn’t to show her who’s in control or whatever or to be mean (do people seriously think he would do that to be mean to her just to slap a girl?) it was strictly to wake her up since he has no means of influencing that besides getting creative

while asleep, jade doesn’t think logically and certainty not to the extent dave needs her to be right now. she’s scattered lalalalala and can forget about limitations or consequences in the real world and also has a short memory span while dreaming: e.g. “4 hours until what?” and she put something into the kernelsprite right after dave asked her not to because she forgor </3 and jade does acknowledge this about her dreaming self btw

GG: i mean, i only talked to you when i was asleep! i am kind of different when im dreaming... GG: i forget things, and at times im not totally sure whats real GG: dont you remember thats what its like to dream on prospit? (p.3056)

dave literally says “we need to wake you up youre not very logical like this” and he does apologize about making her dreambot wake-up slap her

i also see people say that dave thought of jade as helpless and he needs to be the hero and that's why "davejade is not good actually"

TG: but ok i mean isnt that what heroes should be doing TG: working to take down the bad guy without a whole lot of this fuckin grandiloquence and these huge sweeping plans that got nothin to do with fighting him TG: like always biding our time and tiptoeing around the unbeatable god boss TG: johns too nice to get mad TG: rose spends all her time calculating TG: too focused on machiavellian ploys of sabotage to try anything drastic TG: jade is TG: i dont even know TG: probably more a liability if she got it in her head to take him down TG: if anything id bet she just needs protection GC: WH4T 4R3 YOU S4Y1NG H3R3 D4V3, 1N TH1S CONV3RS4T1ON TH4T 1S ST1LL B31NG 4BOUT YOU TG: im just wondering TG: when does someone actually step up TG: jacks got shit to pay for (p.3703)

this minor thread gets followed up on in the pesterlog where jade contacts dave and eventually she concludes jack needs to be stopped and dave's like ... "oh shit" in his head. "oh shit" as in jade's got Game good for her go jade, "oh shit" as in she's going to be ripe for the stabbing cause the idea is in her head now, and "oh shit" as in this moment is the seed of why im going to have to rehearse jade accidentally killing me over and over and i cant tell her about it. due to this he is always fated to die in the alpha timeline both standing up to jack and to protect jade. it's woven into his story. but he was wrong about everyone else also! which i dont see brought up when that quote is used? rose does something drastic (pilots the moon into the furthest ring) and john gets mad (on the ship) and jade is the opposite of needing protection (she’s the only one jack won’t stab and also she ends up so fucking OP she has to be basically written out of act 6) so it's less a thing about jade specifically but to show that in hindsight dave was wrong about ALL his friends. which is an interesting discussion to be had about him in itself, but not now. this is the most sane and well-thought out interpretation of it ive seen

"In general, though, I think Dave has a tendency not uncommon to [thirteen] year olds (or… humans in general, if we’re being honest here) to cast everyone else as a player in his own story and characterize them in ways that fit what he wants. There’s the famous chunk where he says John never gets angry, Rose will never stop scheming long enough to take action, and Jade’s a liability, only to be proven wrong in every count. That fits his understanding of these people and his ideal relationship with them - friend, actor, protector, the one in the group who can be the hero." "Yes, I think Dave probably saw Jade as the most supportive and least judgmental friend. I’m not sure if that impacted his incorrect judgment of her since that’s kind of a pattern for him in general, but I guess it could’ve."

and also putting this solely on dave is kind of ... ehhhhh? because john says the same thing about jade but i don't see anyone getting on his case for it.

CG: SHE AND DAVE RAN INTO JACK, WHICH I'M SURE HE MUST HAVE SAW COMING BECAUSE I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYONE EXPLOIT TIME TRAVEL SO SHAMELESSLY AS HIM, NOT EVEN ARADIA. CG: SO SHE AND DAVE FOUGHT WITH HIM A WHILE, AND LONG STORY SHORT, HE DIED. EB: what!!! CG: BUT IT'S FINE, I GUESS THAT WAS HIS PLAN, LIKE SOME BIZARRE USELESS LAST STAND, EVEN IF HE DIDN'T TELL JADE WHO WAS PRETTY FREAKED OUT UNTIL I TALKED HER THROUGH IT. CG: JADE SAYS SHE HAS THIS FIGURED OUT, AND I DON'T HAVE TIME TO DO MUCH BUT TRUST HER. CG: THE POINT IS, SHE'S ALL BOOKED UP, AND ALL TOO MORTAL. SO SHE WON'T BE DELIVERING THE BOMB, AND NEITHER WILL YOU. EB: ok, well what about this. EB: since she is mortal, and i am not (sort of), and i don't need to do the scratch for a while, can i go help her? EB: maybe she could use some protection? maybe that is what dave was just trying to do, when he temporarily died. EB: remember, jack is still on the loose! he has killed rose and dave once, and me twice. CG: NO NO NO NO NO NO. CG: SWEET BLEEDING JEGUS, EGBERT, YOU KEEP BRAGGING ABOUT YOUR IMMORTALITY, AND THEN BRAINLESSLY ANNOUNCE PLANS TO GO OFF AND DO SOMETHING HEROIC! YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE THE SHORTEST LIFESPAN OF ANY IMMORTAL IN HISTORY. EB: sorry. :( CG: BESIDES, IT'S A TOTAL NON ISSUE. JACK WOULDN'T HESITATE TO STAB YOU AGAIN, BUT HE WON'T HURT JADE FOR SOME REASON. CG: IF ANYTHING, YOU COULD USE HER PROTECTION. (p.3869 / 3871)

and also keep in mind dave does absolutely change his perception about jade's strength??

DAVE: youll probably annihilate me worse than my bro used to DAVE: dont you have all of your dogs insane powers and like DAVE: god tier space powers on top of all that DAVE: how exactly am i supposed to compete with that (p.6384)

DAVE: gotta keep em napping DAVE: especially jade im sure you know what kind of crooked ass baloneyfuck powers she got DAVE: cant let her turn those against us (p.7485)

so back to grimbark jade and the switching of these roles, dave doesn’t entirely lose his pragmatic bent. that’s still the way he thinks about stuff through but his time on the meteor has softened him and allowed him to become more reflective on big-picture things such as his role in everything

ironically this is the exact reason for his clash with grimbark jade is because she’s trying really hard to make him do stuff and it’s stuff that he’s not going to budge on because he doesn’t think it’s practical

JADE: why not? JADE: our empress can hardly have a knight with such rusty combat skills in her service DAVE: will you cut it out with the evil jade baloney DAVE: im not going to fight you DAVE: my rooftop dueling days are OVER JADE: en garde! DAVE: ugh DAVE: even if we just went balls out jackass BANANAS with our swords here i mean realistically how much appreciable advancement in my battle skills would even result from that DAVE: are you actually thinking this through or just going through the vaguely nefarious motions that come with the territory of being evildog!jade JADE: im gonna go through the vaguely nefarious motions of kicking your ass in a minute if you dont put up your dukes!!! DAVE: yeah you probably will DAVE: youll probably annihilate me worse than my bro used to DAVE: dont you have all of your dogs insane powers and like DAVE: god tier space powers on top of all that DAVE: how exactly am i supposed to compete with that JADE: by using your time trickery! JADE: come on dave do your timey thing JADE: get creative, make lots of copies of yourself or something... outsmart me! DAVE: no! JADE: yes!!! DAVE: ok here i go JADE: !!!!! DAVE: wait DAVE: nah JADE: grrr JADE: dave, just try a little time travel to get this fight started JADE: see look, one of your time doubles is surely predestined to come from a few minutes in the future and appear behind me for a surprise attack, riiiight about... JADE: now! JADE: ... JADE: no wait JADE: riiiiiiiiiight... JADE: ... JADE: ... JADE: NOW! JADE: .... JADE: ..... JADE: dave why is your future self being such a wet blanket DAVE: i told you DAVE: im not time traveling DAVE: i think im giving it up for good actually (p.6384)

one thing floral mentions in her post is that dave is pushing jade for answers about her failed relationship with davesprite

DAVE: why are you dragging that guy into this DAVE: what happened with you and him anyway JADE: none of your business >:p DAVE: it kind of is DAVE: hes bird me DAVE: that clearly means i have a right to know JADE: that doesnt make any sense! DAVE: you said he had issues DAVE: what issues JADE: augh! JADE: forget i mentioned it DAVE: was he talking shit about me the whole time or something DAVE: i know he resents me for being the real dave JADE: dont say that, you arent the real dave! JADE: well you are, but phrasing it like that is so mean! JADE: hes just as real as you, and when you imply he isnt you sound like a jerk!!! DAVE: man i knew it DAVE: i knew he was poisoning your view of me all those years DAVE: and i wasnt there to say anything or defend against his slander so now of course you think im a neurotic douche (p.6386)

and while it is true nobody is obligated to share the details of their relationship, there is a LOT of evidence to believe dave was asking because he wants to be a good person and, to me his words here, and his past and future actions relative to this point, show that he’s not as messed up of a person as grimbark jade is making him out to be. let’s dive into it. think on this: why does dave care so much what jade thinks about him? he started getting “neurotic” halfway through the conversation once jade brought up her feelings about him

JADE: THE ONLY REASON I THINK YOURE A NEUROTIC DOUCHE IS BECAUSE YOURE ACTING LIKE ONE NOW!!! DAVE: yeah but i only started acting like a neurotic douche like half way through this conversation DAVE: you clearly had an axe to grind with me from the start and i want to know why DAVE: what did i ever do to deserve this shit from you JADE: YOU BROKE MY HEART!!!!!! DAVE: what DAVE: i did DAVE: when (p.6386)

he’s genuinely so lost because he hadn’t had contact with any extension of jade in 3 years. alpha timeline dave has been sensitive towards jade for basically forever and especially now that he’s had time to grow up. he is not going to allow any version of himself hurt jade, and thats why hes asking so many questions to her about the nature of the relationship and what happened

JADE: ok not you JADE: davesprite did JADE: BUT YOURE BASICALLY THE SAME GUY! DAVE: whoa no way DAVE: thats such an unfair characterization we are completely different dudes JADE: you just said you had a right to know what happened between us because, and i quote, "hes bird me" DAVE: no i know DAVE: i was playing the "hes bird me" card because it was convenient to whatever it was i was saying at the time DAVE: i forget what point i was making when i said that JADE: *growl* DAVE: but thats not the point im making now DAVE: he and me are just DAVE: crazy different yo DAVE: hes got fuckin wings!!! DAVE: he also presumably takes a dump and lays eggs out of the same ghostly hole DAVE: ... DAVE: ew man whyd i have to go there JADE: *SNARL* DAVE: ok if he broke up with you or whatever that was because of his dumb bird issues not my issues DAVE: theres no way i would have done that to you (p.6386)

what dave means to say by “hes bird me because it was convenient to say at the time but it doesnt apply to this circumstance” is exactly what i was getting at in part 1 of this series of posts. yes, they are the same people at their very foundation, different reflections of a single character, but up to a point. there’s a gray area of whether or not we can call dave and davesprite the same person. in terms of this conflict though, dave should be regarded as a separate individual because of their diverging history up to that point and adolescent-teenage growth in different environments and under different circumstances. even if dave doesn't know what hes trying to say

he wants to know what this alternate version of himself did to hurt jade so much. even if grimbark jade really is bringing dave into some shit he had nothing to do with.

see the thing is, to me dave could have easily handled being accused a lot worse and say something like “youre overreacting” or something. that wouldve been dickish. but he doesn’t, he never does. he really seems to be more motivated by like, “woah what?? whats his problem? are these about issues i still have and dont know they were hurting jade or are they uniquely davesprite’s?”

like, this isn’t a joke to him even if his main form of communication through humor to lighten the mood (jade loves dave’s silliness dont forget all the times she’s giggled because dave was “so silly” and “hes a funny guy”). immediately after rescuing the mayor from eviljade’s lava kick, he was going to give davesprite a piece of his mind and this shows he is sincerely concerned about what an alternate version of himself did to break jade’s heart. he REALLY fuckin wants closure on it because he cares about her feelings so much

i don’t see this other side covered in floral’s post, but evildog jade here is Also pushing dave to do something that he is uncomfortable with as well, which is to use time travel.

dave stopped time traveling so he wouldn’t “have to wonder all the time if i was taking a wrong turn and dooming everybody”, stating he was “never that cool with it” to rose back in act 5. around the same time when karkat talks to john, he says “TO MY KNOWLEDGE, HE DOESN'T TIME TRAVEL AFTER [FIGHTING JACK WITH JADE], AND HE AND ROSE STAY ON DERSE WAITING FOR THE BOMB UNTIL YOU START THE SCRATCH” which honestly makes me think that whole event was the nail in the coffin for dave on time traveling. seeing himself die fighting jack and knowing it was coming and he couldnt tell jade no matter how much he wanted to that her bullets were going to be the cause. this is the last straw for him regarding time traveling it affected him that much

remember the last lines of pesterlog jade had with dave before being separated? i mentioned it earlier--the one where jade decided jack needs to be stopped and they should “come up with a better plan than Rose’s suicide mission to stop him. Dave suggests the idea is futile, but lets her know she’d come to her own decision regardless, and he’d be available to talk later if needed” (from recap 3)

GG: well maybe im just being naive... GG: but a crazy suicide mission does not sound like the ideal solution to me! GG: are you suuuure we cant beat him? GG: i dont know if we should rule it out! TG: well TG: youre about to do what youre about to do TG: and im not going to tell you not to TG: i wont do the bullshit troll thing and tell you what youre going to do and then just dare you not to TG: while knowing damn well you will anyway TG: so ill just say TG: whats next is up to you TG: and if later you want to talk about it TG: im here GG: ok GG: thanks dave! (p.3204)

this was dave’s nice causality-free way of saying ���youre going to end up killing me during the jack fight that winds up happening. i cant tell you that im going to die and that youre going to be the one to shoot me, because i know you wouldnt go through with it. that would drag us in a doomed timeline and we’d all die anyway, not just me. youre probably going to be freaked out when it happens since i can’t tell you this, so if you want to talk me about it later, ill be here for you”

which, first of all is, holy shit. he cares about her and her feelings so fucking much. and it’s nothing new

TT: What about why you went to fight Jack? TG: sure TG: i did that TG: because i wanted to TG: and because i was supposed to TT: Are you sure? TG: yeah i saw my future self fighting him so obviously that had to happen or else id be dead anyway TG: without even getting the satisfaction of standing up to him TT: So what about Jade? TG: what TT: You didn't tell her your expedition with her would result in your death, let alone one she'd inadvertently cause. TT: Or that she'd be stuck with the job of resuscitating you. Did you? TG: what am i really supposed to say TG: hey were gonna hunt frogs til you shoot me through the jack TG: then i die and youve got to make out with me TG: that kind of changes how the whole thing goes doesnt it TT: Not if you're "supposed to," right? TG: what does that even mean TT: I guess you're right. No reason to make an effort to empathize if doing so comes at the price of oblivion. TG: wtf TT: It must be comforting to have your ASPD tacitly supported by predestination. TG: aspd TT: Antisocial personality disorder. TG: oh no TG: this conversation just got bumrushed by a mudslide of fucking awful TT: It wasn't already awful, believing you might be dead? TG: you dont know anything TG: about what i was feeling or what happened on lofaf TG: you were all pavement faced and babbling your throefester speak and flipping off the shit with your own crazy deathwish thing why do you think you know what was going through my head TG: youre just assuming and throwing around psyche buzzwords like aspd complex disorder TG: im telling you if i said anything at all about it she probably doesnt even fire her gun once and all im doing is dragging her into a doomed timeline with me TT: I guess I'm learning to be impressed by your sense of obligation to inevitable misfortune. It's a strange case of inspiration through futility. TG: none of this is that big a deal TG: i just mentioned the basics to her TG: that id stop time traveling soon TG: break out of the loops TG: not have to wonder all the time if i was taking a wrong turn and dooming everybody TG: i was never that cool with this (p.3896)

dave got suddenly super fucking defensive about rose making assumptions about how he felt about fighting jack and knowing jade was going to inadvertently kill him, knowing damn well how jade reacts to seeing corpses (remember that time dave threw his slain body out the window so jade wouldnt see it because “it would probably freak her out”), and the fact that he couldn’t warn her to protect the alpha timeline and also protect both of them and everyone from falling into a doomed timeline. and he knew it was coming the whole time. he was right, rose didn’t know what was going through his head. but his defensiveness here means he had strong feelings about it. not only that but dave saying “whats next is up to you, and if later you want to talk about it, im here” shows the amount of trust he has towards her

we see him tell this to grimbark jade straight up his thought process for why he stopped time traveling. and it’s spot on with what i said. again, remember that this is the first conversation he has with jade after 3 years being separated

DAVE: but see with time travel DAVE: all the stuff about learning it so you dont have to use it is true DAVE: theres no good that can come of it DAVE: you can crunch the logic on the loops all you want DAVE: but all youre doing is painting yourself into a corner DAVE: creating inevitabilities you have to rehearse and enact or face death for yourself or everyone you know DAVE: and sometimes facing death is the very inevitability you have to rehearse DAVE: and then you wait and wait knowing its coming and knowing it has to happen DAVE: how do you think it made me feel when we were gathering up all those frogs DAVE: and i knew the whole time in a little while you would have to watch me get shot DAVE: but i couldnt say anything or it would mess it all up DAVE: all cause i thought it would be cool to be marty mcfuckin fly DAVE: but instead of shredding johnny b goode on guitar to get my parents to bang DAVE: my crowning performance was doing a funny dance while getting pumped full of lead JADE: ...... (p.6385)

and what fucking broke me yesterday was realizing after all this time, ironically it was DAVE who wound up being the one who had to talk to jade about it.

JADE: sorry dave, you lost me there after the part where i shot you DAVE: damn DAVE: ok lemme start over (p.6385)

“damn ok lemme start over” bro he really wants to open up to her about this thing he’s been stewing on for three years only for it to fall on deaf mind controlled ears. it’s so fucking sad

part 3 is cooking and it’s going to be about dave’s character growth post-meteor and what that means for dave and jade

[1-up-chump]

I really loved the Vtuber one it just worms my heart can i request for part 2? But this time its Johnny, Kabal, Kitana, Jade, and Cassie please?

Reader is a v tuber who regularly does charity livestreams pt.2

Johnny cage:

Totally into it as soon as you explained what you do. When he's not busy, he tries to make surprise appearances in your videos and drop a bunch of messages he knows you'll read. No matter how annoyed you are with him, you can't admit out loud he has impeccable comedic timing.

Gives you a bunch of tips and advice for "advancing your career" he gets from his own agents. You have to tell him you do this out of passion mostly and not as a full time job.

With that said, Johnny was all over your idea of doing a charity livestream. He knew you would know right away a big anonymous donation would be him, so he got as many of his friends as he could convince to come together and bombard you with the most successful donation drive you ever had.

Johnny didn't even want to be near the spotlight, you deserved it far more. You tearing up made him tear up too when you gave a big thank you speech. Of course afterwards he gave you a big kiss ambush and asked you how it feels to be the most generous celebrity of all time.

Kabal:

Kabal pretends to not know about your livestream gig, but really he knew as soon as he met you. He's very supportive vocally and anonymously.

When you told him about the charity event you were doing, he wished you luck. And while you were none the wiser, he pulled a few strings here and there.

You were shocked at how much you passed the donation goal, you felt so happy you ran to tell kabal. And kabal responded by twirling you around happily. He loves to see his baby doll so happy.

Kitana:

Kitana still had to get used to the internet beyond the silly internet memes and Instagram. To which she used to browse beautiful works of art, poetry, and the occasional funny quotes. Kitana is fully supportive of your "v tuber" entertainer profession.

Kitana was even more supportive of your charity event, offering to even watch and donate herself (with a little difficulty of converting edenian currency, its a headache earthrealm doesn't have one universal form of currency).

Once the initial complications were settled, you went beyond the donation goal and felt so excited you ran over to kitana to hug her. Not knowing your own strength, you accidentally bowl her over. Once you both pick yourself off the ground and stop laughing for a moment, she kisses you on the forehead.

Jade:

Like kitana, she had to get used to the chaotic nature of the internet. But once she could navigate, she liked how you were happy doing what you loved.

Even more so when you told her about the charity livestream event. She absolutely participated and watched you act a fool for the greater good. Jade adored that you were a good natured person, and although you could stand to have a little more dignity, she wouldn't have it any other way.

You celebrated raising enough to pass the donation goal with a little party. Even bringing a whole bowl full of those earthrealm candies jade loves to eat.

Cassie cage:

Cassie immediately begged for your username when you casually mentioned you were a v tuber. She promoted you better than her dad's PR team, you spiked in new viewers by the whole few weeks. You tried to tell her it was just a passionate hobby, but cassie wanted you to succeed so you could continue to do more of what you so clearly love to do.

Cassie essentially became your partner in more ways than one. And you both collaborated on how to do this charity livestream event you planned to do ever since you started. You wanted to be influential enough to make a difference in the world, no matter how small. Cassie admired you for that and made sure to help you just as much as you helped her.

With upmost planning and a little reluctant acceptance of help from her ever so famous dad, you broke past the donation goal so much quicker than you ever would anticipate. You were almost crying and thanked cassie for making your dreams come true, she retorted by telling you to really thank her, you should kiss her and maybe buy her dinner too. Johnny cage scolded cassie for her lack of smoothness and corrected her performance. You spent a good 15 minutes after the livestream ended with cassie arguing with her dad about romance

[gyubby99]

@disneyanddisneyships

Alastor x fem! Reader soft headcanons

He does not want to see you frowning. He wants to make you happy and entertained. It's what perks of him being your boyfriend is like

Will hum old-timey love songs to make you smile

"Smile and keep your head up, my dear! You are never fully dressed without one."

He thinks the way you can still love despite being left a bunch of times is what makes you unique, what makes you stand out to others.

Kisses on the forehead are his favorite things to do with you.

If you tell him you are insecure about your appearance, he will love you just the same. I promise.

"That is nonsense, darling! No one in here is perfect, especially in hell! Nevermind these voices in your head because my voice is telling you that you are an astute, marvelous wonderful woman! I believe I should give these people my monocle instead, because how terribly they see you makes them all blind!" He laughs along with a laugh track after the last statement.

He hypes you up in everything you do and he does it in a silly manner like a dance sequence or a musical number

He will randomly take you dancing so be prepared

This man does not care about your weight. He will still princess carry you.

He sees you crying and never asks if you're okay. He already knows you're not, so he sits beside you instead.

Will summon your favorite ice cream even tho he hates sweets.

He will ask you what's wrong and will do his best to listen to you rant.

See, I love gentle comforting alastor. But I raise you, Alastor trying to comfort you but he seems like he's not taking anything seriously.

You got nightmares? He'd say "Oh, I forgot to chase one away! It won't happen again, darling!"

"Oh, you've got demons in your head, you say? Well, that's worrisome, because I should be the only demon living in your mind!"

Like he never takes anything seriously. But he wants you to be happy and he loves you.

It's a bonus if you cope with humor.

He is trying his best.

He would comfort you by making jokes about what you're going through and it's oddly comforting and makes you laugh.

And when you're extremely sadder he would cook you your favorite meal.

Owns a "kiss the cook" apron

"Oh, darliiiiing~ am I seeing a frown on your face, dear? Well, you best turn it upside down because now I'm here to ensure that you are happy and entertained!"

Will sing you old-timey love songs

Whenever he leaves the hotel he summons a red hat and tips it to you for some reason

Tends to keep you close at times and enjoys being in your personal space

"Shall we pester Angel in his endeavours?" He offers with an evil menacing smile

Tells you how beautiful you are everytime you walk into the room:

"Oh, you look ravishing, my dear! As always!"

"Good morning, darling! Aren't you looking gorgeous?"

Will squish your chubby cheeks because he finds it adorable.

[hyunsoolgc]

◎ PAGE 024

⸻  ACTING MISSION  /  new faces awards

The prospect of earning an award for their efforts this variety project ( if he can refer to it as such ) has Hyunsoo in an odd bundle of nerves. He has never been one for variety — not in the conventional sense. His affinities lie in his career itself rather than the tertiary things that it may encompass. At the very least, he has gradually grown ever more comfortable with the idea that he may have an interest in hosting. His own YouTube channel has done well enough to display it. He should have also been accustomed to dressing up and walking along a velvet carpet; despite being as fake as it comes. It is only for the show, he reminds himself, don't take it so seriously...

Though, Hyunsoo still worries over silly little things. Can he be entertaining enough? Will anyone laugh at the things he does in a positive way? Of course, he knows that he has fallen into the typical overthinking routine he tends to. Not that he means anything by it, nor thinks of the show as anything but a meaningful experience. ( His ever-growing social skills certainly thank the staff for it. )

"Next... The Big Eater award," there is a silence drumming of hands against any surface. "Lee Hyunsoo!"

The actor in question exhales as he steps forward. The tip of his dress show catches on a bunched part of the carpet, and he stumbles forward without the grace he intended to. Before accepting his award, he feigns waving to photographers who aren't there and clears his throat.

"Ah... Thank you so much for deeming me the..." he twists to re-read the award title, and his ears promptly redden. "The Big Eater of the show. I... simply could not allow the hard work of craft services to go to waste so I made the most use of it during breaks... and also during filming." He's sure there are plenty of frames of him chewing throughout. "I am something of an expert at sneaking snacks during things ever since my days in high school and during training... and eating much more at lunch... I would like my friends foe allowing me so much practice by giving me their leftovers— Why am I admitting this? Hah... In any case, I am very honored for this award and title. Thank you again."

With another bow, the rookie actor with a face the color of the carpet scurries back to his seat.

[milktea067]

Self love time! This fic is inspired by “I LOVE MY BODY” by Mother moon!

Hey y’all! Been a while! Have this as payment for my absence! I have whole bunch of unfinished projects in my drafts, so I have been writing I just haven’t finished them!

Sunny x gender neutral reader! Platonic!

Warnings:Mentions of low self esteem and needing validation/Mentions of emotionally unavailable or unstable parents/Mentions of not feeling good enough/some tears but not too many!

Not proofread very well 💀

——————————————————————

You had just arrived at the daycare, the sound of other children laughing and playing filling your ears as your caretaker dropped you off with a smile, promising to be back later and encouraging you to have fun.

Gosh you were excited. You loved coming here day after day, almost looking forward to your guardian(s) having to work early or late if it meant you got to spend time with your favorite friend in the world.

Weaving through the crowd of excited children you finally saw him, Sunny. Dressed head to toe in a silly jester costume, bells hanging off of his wrists and ankles, making him jingle with every step or movement. He was currently entertaining them by balancing a plastic ball on his face, his voice playful as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

“Hey kids! This is a lot of fun, but you know what else is fun? Singing! I love singing, you can sing about anything!” He exclaimed, hopping up in excitement and causing the plastic ball to fly in the air, coming down and hitting his head with a soft thud.

Of course this made the lot of you giggle, hushed murmurs soon falling onto the crowd as he began to speak again.

“Today we’re going to be singing about my favorite thing ever! Can anyone guess what it is?” He said, his whole body literally trembling in excitement, amusing you greatly as his robotic parts hummed, trying to keep up with him.

“Oh! Oh!! I know! It’s pancakes! I like pancakes!”

“Is it colors?! Mr.Sunny likes to color with my crayons!”

“I like kitty cats! Can we sing about kitty cats?!” They exclaimed.

The kids all seemed to have similar answers, some assuming he was talking about their favorite things such as their doggies or their kitties, others seeming to love the idea of him singing about candy and ice cream and other sweet treats.

None of them seemed to be correct, though.

“Those are all really good answers! Maybe we can sing about those things after! Though, I-I’m really surprised no one has guessed it yet!” The robot said, standing proudly with his hands on his hips while you and the other little ones looked at each other. Equally confused.

Seeing the confused faces and hearing the hushed whispers, Sunny let out a soft laugh, crouching down so he was level with all of you.

“I’m talking about you silly! My favorite thing in the entire world is you!!” He said, his robotic eyes seeming to soften as he gazed at all of you lovingly, his hands gently resting on his knees as you and the other children began to giggle.

You of course couldn’t help but smile, it felt good to know that there was someone that cared for you, and would love you unconditionally. You didn’t get much of that at home nowadays, your parent(s) or guardian always working, or just emotionally unavailable, always pushing you aside or brushing you off whenever you wanted to play or cuddle.

“Now, I’ve set up squares for all of you to stand on! It’s very very important to stand on your squares and your squares only! We wouldn’t want to accidentally hit someone while we’re letting the wiggle worms out would we?” Said sunny, standing up and gesturing to the neatly placed and equally spaced rubber squares he had set on the floor before hand.

After looking around you eventually found a square to stand on, smiling up at him as he reached around one of the slides and grabbed what seemed to be a ukulele.

“It’s okay If you don’t want to sing! You don’t have to dance or move ether if you don’t want too, I know sometimes being playful around new people can be scary, so you can take your time! We don’t mind, do we kids?” The robot said, receiving a collective “No Mr.Sunny!” From all of you.

“Alright! Here we go!” He said, his metal fingers moving along the strings, coaxing out a happy little tune.

You and the other kids happily watched and listened to your daycare attendant play the first couple seconds of the song, the same melody repeating a couple times before he began to sing.

“I love my body from my head to my toes, I love my face— my eyes my mouth my nose!”

“I love the way I look when I look in the mirror, I stand a little closer just to see a little clearer”

“Who is that..? It’s me!”

He sang, the kids around you laughing as they tried their best to sing with him, able to predict some of his words and happily shout along. He laughed with you all, his mechanical head gently tilting side to side as he sang and played, his whole body gently swaying with the music and his favorite munchkin’s voices.

“And I am looking good as good can be..”

“So, what do I say?”

“I tell myself I love me everyday!”

It was…strange hearing those words, especially when it was about you. You had always thought, for some reason or another, that you were not good enough. That maybe, if you were different, your caretakers or friends would love you better.

Tears began to fill your eyes, sadness and joy swirling in your chest as you let them fall. Your little mind didn’t understand why you were feeling like this, the only thing you knew was that you didn’t want him to stop. You wanted to hear those words forever.

Circling back to the previous line, Sunny noticed you had stopped swaying. It didn’t take him too long to see the small tears falling down your face as you listened to the sound of his ukulele, and the kids voices singing in uncoordinated “unison”.

Slowly, sunny crouched down in front of your square, softening his strumming just a little bit to make the kids quiet down, and slowly ease the energy in the room so he could do his best to connect with you on a more personal level.

“So what do I say..?”

He sang, his voice trailing off as he waited for you to answer. Slowly, through your tears, your voice broke through.

“..I tell myself I love me everyday..”

———————————————————————

I hope you enjoyed this one! Once again, sorry for being gone for so long!

Tags!: @boxofbadsenses @starryshipz @femalemarvelself @anima-chara @mossygremlinchild

[yeeunjia]

─── 𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐙 !! ✰ 10: “do you like me?”

SYNOPSIS: you and jake sim have known each other for years. jake has always admired you and you felt the same. unfortunately, neither of you was aware of your feelings for each other. after a few years of being a trainee, you were finally able to debut in a group under jyp entertainment named "solarna" and you were able to meet jake again. jake- he still feels the same. but you, on the other hand, had moved on. with that being said, this time, jake didn't back down and made sure to try his best to be able to steal your heart once again.

WARNINGS: swearing !!

“so… you really decided to bring layla? the guts you have to use my baby just to make me talk to you!” you tease and chuckle, making jake smile.

“she missed you too, you know. we both lost contact after high school, after all.” your smile began to fade away. you still remember it. how you two suddenly lost contact after leaving without saying anything else to each other.

jake looks at you in the eye, “being the class prez for years must’ve been hard, right?” you nod, “yeah..sort of. well, you were there to help me anyway! i still remember how we couldn’t even leave each other’s side.” a giggle escaped jake’s lips when you said this.

“still, im sorry for bugging you. i know it’s too early but i couldn’t help it anymore. and when i said that i like y-“

“it’s fine, jake. really! i was just a bit upset, that’s all. you’re not the type to joke around when it comes to things like that so..”

“but-“

“i swear, it’s fine.”

silence filled the room for a couple of minutes. that was until you realized how you felt sleepy and decided to speak up.

“hey? is it fine with you to sleep here? you can’t drive when it’s still dark outside. don’t even think about doing that again. i’ll keep you company too, though!”

it meant that you were going to sleep…beside him.. jake felt his cheeks heat up.

“only if you’re comfy with that..”

“don’t be silly, we’ve done this before. when we worked for a bunch of projects, remember?” you forced a laugh as you lie your head on jake’s shoulder. you felt him wrap an arm around you but you didn’t mind it much.

“please don’t even think about ignoring me again. it made me feel like crap..i need you more than i can even describe.”

“you need…me? don’t beat around the bush, what does that mean, sim?”

“i’ll tell you soon. get some sleep.”

“sim jake….do you like me..?”

##. ✰ MASTERLIST // PREVIOUS // NEXT

TAGLIST (closed) : @ahnneyong @enhypencil @yunki4evr @stopeatread @i-dalso @bearseulgs @jaeyunnsworld @bluesoobinnie @oharella @zychasamara @enhacolor @angel-hyuckie @cyuuupid @nshrkilvbt @hseungi @hwalllllllelujah @strwberrydinosaur

[ulquiorrapleasecallmetrash]

I saw your post, can I request prompt 6 & 17 as well as kisses 3 then 4 for Byakuya Kuchiki 😪💖 muchly appreciated

¨*:·..·:*¨¨*:·..·:*¨.·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨

Fandom: Bleach

words: 1,419

Rated: G

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None!

Harmony: Oooo sounds pretty fun! Here you go I hope you enjoy it!

Prompt 6: "I can't stop thinking about you. No matter how hard I try, you're always on my mind"

Prompt 17: "Part of me wants to keep the promise I made to myself.. the other half wants to say 'screw it'" "Which half is winning?" "The latter"

Kiss 3: Small peck, pause, then a passionate kiss

Kiss 4: Against the wall/door kiss

.·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨

Everyone dies.

Even soul reapers have an expiration date. That is just how life is.

Sometimes, trying to deny the reality of this can be very hard for anyone.

You were completely different from her. Yet, you somehow add some kind of spark or flame that burns in Byakuya's soul.  He couldn't understand it.  You were loud, too obnoxious, and extremely opinionated which were all the things Byakuya loathed. But when you are passionate, fierce, and confident with yourself those were the parts where you shined the most. The realization that he first liked you dawned on him was when you first saved him. Your fighting was fierce yet elegant, the power, the fiery in your eyes when you defeated the enemy was perfect. But the touch when you gave him was so gentle and nurturing. He couldn't deny that he wanted you to keep caressing him until you opened your mouth.

"Wow, you really got your ass handed to you, idiot."

There it was. Your talking always killed the mood, reminding me how truly unbearable you really can be.

"You don't look so good either..."

You grinned, followed by a boisterous laugh, "True but at least I'm still standing. I checked and it looks like you have a few broken bones on your arm and left leg, other than that, just a few scrapes and bruises. You're lucky that guy didn't fuck you up even more. Good thing your princess is here to save you huh?" Still, even with the pain he was in he still couldn't help but roll his eyes at you.

"Even in battle, you're still as irritating as the day I first met you."

You giggled at him, true, but you knew right from the beginning that he had some kind of interest in you. Rather it's your good qualities or your bad ones.

"Come on, let me help you up, I'll take you to the infirmary."

A week later Byakuya couldn't help but think back on the day when you saved his life, it was becoming too distracting. What's even worse was that he had to take everything easy since he was healing.  Even Renji himself could tell something was wrong with him, it was like he was always daydreaming about something. Everyone knew you had affected Byakuya in a certain way, whether it was in a negative or a positive way. It was still entertaining for everyone to see.

It was quite clear that you felt the same way when you appeared at Byakuya's hospital room with a bunch of flowers and a cute kawaii bunny stuffed animal.

"Why are you giving me such an unnecessary gift?" He glared at them, especially the stupid-looking bunny.

"Because I notice that no one has given you any gifts."

"That's because I specially requested everyone not to send me anything."

"Well, I did it anyway."

There you go again... but instead of being annoyed by the fact that you went out and did it any way he was somehow very touched by the nice gesture.

"Just exactly why would you go out of your way to send me things I specially requested not to?"

"Because I care for my captain and I know that you like bunnies." You smirked at him, causing Byakuya to let out an exasperated sigh, "You never change, do you? Always being so ridiculous."

You made a silly pouty face, fake crying afterward, "So harsh Bya~ All I wanted was to express how much I care of you." Your smile was genuine and it lit up the whole infirmary room, it made Byakuya's heart skip a beat. He somehow felt...warm when you smiled at him just like this. You walked closer to him, leaning down to cup his cheek, staring into his eyes.

You gave him a small peck on the lips out of nowhere. Byakuya's eyes widened, not sure what to think, your eyes widened again, your face now red like the roses you have given him. "I-I um... I better get going. See you later Captain Byakuya!" You then scurried off before he could say another word to you.

Now A month later, he was still thinking about the kiss you had given him. It had become nonstop, he remembered what your lips had felt like and how your warmth had healed something in him. He had promised to never fall in love again, he made that promise to Hisana and he was sticking to it but now here you are, breaking down the wall that he made all these years. Was it truly okay to fall in love with someone who was the exact opposite of Hisana?

Was it okay to truly love again?

He had never felt this way towards anyone else before...

"Hey Captain, I have the papers for you~." You hummed as you busted into Byakuya's office. Typical you, but a different day. He sighed, picking up his pen before staring at you rather coldly, "Set it on my desk." You did just that, staring at him out of curiosity. He seemed... different like he was always deep in thought. Why exactly was that?

"Hey Captain, out of curiosity, is something wrong?" Byakuya shot his head up, speaking rather quickly, "why would there be something wrong?" You simply shrugged, "I know something is wrong, ever since the day I visited you. I want to apologize for the kiss, I was worried about you and I was relieved that you would be okay...I just... don't know what I would if anything were to happen to you."

"Is that so?"

You nodded, "Yeah, despite our bickering I really do... like you.  As a boss I mean." He was silent, and it had made you nervous, why he's always so silent when he thinks?

"Are you sure it isn't just more than just that?" His question was so straightforward it made you even more scared to say something.

"Maybe it is, the real question is, what do you really think about me?"  You stared at him, now it was your turn to be straightforward. He got up from his desk, walking up to you, his dark eyes stared into your shiny e/c ones.  His slightly cold hand, cupped your reddened cheek, they felt nice against your warm skin, "I can't stop thinking about you. No matter how hard I try, you're always on my mind. And I don't know why. At first, I thought because you irritated me so much. Everything that you said was always so memorable but the day when you saved me, it made me realize how strong, passionate, and capable you are. It was something I always ignored and now I realized how... important you are to me."

You couldn't help but giggle at what he had said, "Really? So, you do like me?" Your heart was racing, but you were deep down scared at what he had said, you realized that he might not be able to love you because of Hisana.

He took your hands into his', before speaking again, "Part of me wants to keep the promise I made to myself... the other half wants to say 'screw it' and love you with all of my heart."  You couldn't believe he would be this vulnerable towards you, "Really? Then Which half is winning?" "The latter."

He lifted your chin up, so you could stare into your eyes, for once his eyes were filled with something, something passionate and loving. Then, right before completely pulling into you, he pushes against the wall, placing a hand onto the wall right beside you to trap you, making sure that you wouldn't leave his grasp, not like you wanted to leave anyway. He gave you a peck on the lips, then he went right back in to give you another kiss, this time more loving and passionate. You both spent a minute enjoying each other like this, the urgency you both had for each other was apparent. He needed you as much as you needed him. He then let go of you, the both you of panting from the kiss you both went through together.

You then smirked at him, "So why don't you tell me how you really feel Captain."

For the first time he smiled at your smart mouth, "You always have something to say, don't you?"

"If it makes our relationship more interesting than yes, I do." You teased him, causing him to lean forward again to give you another kiss.

.·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨

[neonscandal]

9 Anime to Watch When You Want to Feel Like 👇🏾

So you just finished something heavy or maybe you finally finished an epically long show (looking at you, One Piece) and now you need a silly little respite for some casual viewing. Here are a few short series/movies to check out for a quick laugh.

The Devil is a Part-Timer (series) - this is not your average isekai. Usually, we see someone from modern times getting sent back to like feudal era (or something fantasy-eque but primitive nonetheless) who sees meteoric success because of their expansive knowledge compared to those around them. Yea no, imagine Satan himself blasting into the modern era with no street smarts, no self-awareness and none of his fiendish powers. How does he get by? If you want a touch of action with your funny, this is a great choice.

Sub/Dub | Tubi, Funimation, Hulu, Crunchyroll

The Vampire Dies in No Time (series) - I love a good subversive comedy (as seen above) and this also challenges the notion of strong vampires and.. even what vampires can be. Ronaldo, white haired vampire hunter pictured above, had no idea the peril he'd encounter when he snuck into the great Draluc's castle. It was the kind of peril that lingers since, ultimately, Draluc ends up becoming his unwelcome house guest along with his faithful companion, John. Expect maybe a tiny bit of fan service but not in ways you'd expect.

Sub/Dub | Funimation

Wave Listen to Me (series) - what if your shitty ex could give you more than just a broken heart? Like maybe a total career change? Minare, woman after my own heart, gets plastered one night and ends up on the radio airing out her own dirty laundry. Turns into quite the side gig with her penchant for self-deprecating Gilmore Girls tempo delivery. The overarching message of the show has depth and the character feels real despite always being wrapped in a few layers of fiction. All in all, relatable.

Sub/Dub | Funimation

Chio's School Road (series) - Chio is just a gamer girl with an eccentrically rich inner life stemming from some severe awkwardness that endears her to me immediately. The show follows her everyday commute to school that is made complicated time and time again, usually by her own hand.

Sub/Dub | Funimation, Crunchyroll

Hinamatsuri (series) - imagine a magical girl who isn’t quite so… magical. She’s got the powers but she has a complete lack of self awareness and social graces. That is our MC Hina which is to low-level yakuza thug Nitta’s distinct displeasure when she appears in his apartment one day. The series follows their best attempt at a functional father-daughter relationship as Nitta tries to turn Hina into a normal kid with some wholesome and endearing subplots involving rough around the edges, Anzu.

Sub/Dub | Funimation, Crunchyroll

Life Lessons with Uramichii-San (series) - maybe this is the kind of show you only find funny once you have lower back pain but there's something about the bitter, worn down Uramichii contrasting the bright and hopeful children he entertains that just speaks to me. Imagine finding out that the Sesame Street cast is comprised of a bunch of depressed, chain smoking loners who are hanging on by a silly string thread (oh and they also have troubling sleep paralysis demons). Millennials, rise up, this one is for us.

Sub/Dub | Funimation, Crunchyroll

Love After World Domination (series) - love hurts but sometimes it's a good hurt like when you're forced to fight your significant other to keep up appearances so you can avoid scandalizing your relationship. Oh, just Reaper Princess and Red Gelato? This Romeo + Juliet story follows a villain and a hero as they awkwardly navigate their first romantic relationship, privately. Fan service in this show (as seen above) is going to be more in abundance and, at times, used as a comedic device so be warned.

Sub/Dub | Crunchyroll

Monthly Girls Nozaki-kun (series) - There's something about characters who show a complete lack of awareness that kills me. The story centers on a girl confessing to her classmate not realizing he's actually one of her favorite shojo romance's mangaka (who is supposed to be a girl). If you're confused, so is Chiyo when she somehow secures an invite to her crush's house. It's cute and awkward and the crazy characters that seem to surround Nozaki ultimately inspire his manga.

Sub/Dub | HiDive

Grand Blue Dreaming (series) - Rife with so much debauchery there's a disclaimer at the beginning, this show follows college freshman Iori as he moves to a seaside town with his uncle who owns a dive shop. Iori has moments of wholesome reflection while trying to appreciate his coming of age which is constantly underpinned by the mischief and trouble one can only expect when navigating adulthood, independence and romance for the first time. The show has a good sprinkle of life lessons from unexpected places, but, considering the source, take it with a grain of salt as there are several questionable elements that I'm choosing to gloss over here. Expect gratuitous fan service though. And some generally problematic tropes sprinkled in with those hijinks. Is it obvious I’m second guessing this recommendation?

Sub | Prime Video

[thelaundrybitch]

I posted 8,783 times in 2022

That's 8,442 more posts than 2021!

127 posts created (1%)

8,656 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@turtle-babe83

@post-apocalyptic-daydream

@rheawritesforfun

@leosgirl82

I tagged 665 of my posts in 2022

#thelaundrybitch - 131 posts

#tmnt - 85 posts

#teenage mutant ninja turtles - 81 posts

#tmnt fanfiction - 61 posts

#tmnt bayverse - 61 posts

#tmnt leo - 60 posts

#tmnt leonardo - 54 posts

#tmnt donnie - 53 posts

#bayverse leo - 51 posts

#bayverse leonardo - 50 posts

Longest Tag: 112 characters

#humanoid turtles - a hero that sprouts rainbows out her ass - and the laundry bitch who gets her prince charming

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Pillow Wars - TMNT HC's

TURTLE DOVES!

I hope y'all are doing well and staying safe 🥰😘

This evening I will be answering a FABULOUS ask from @lec743

The original ask:

Can you write a story about the reader (or an OC of your choice idc) having an all out Pillow War with one of the turtles (I'd prefer it to be all four of them but that's my only preference so you can make the singular choice of turtle if your adamant about sticking to one character at a time). I want mayhem! I want blood (the blood being silly string)! I want the king to fall to their pillowy demise! laughs evil-y clears throat Anyway, I don't want there to be any romance in it, maybe just playful flirting… And that just about covers it. Hope I'm not asking too much from you.

I had a lot of fun writing this! Thank you so much for indulging me with hilarity and shenanigans!!!

I hope you like it 😘

Warnings: swearwords, fluffy butt whooping, and lots of fun 😂

Another attempt at Gender Neutral reader insert - please be kind about any mistakes I may have overlooked 💜

Shout out to my girl @leosgirl82 for being my second set of eyes and the other half of my brain

Scooby Drew strikes again 😂🥰😘💜

Reblogs only please!

Pillow Wars

Pillow Wars 

Same ol' same ol'

You get to the lair

Raph is thumbing through a motorcycle magazine

Mike is sitting in the recliner playing a game

Don is in the lab 

Leo is locked in his room doing GOD knows what

And you're bored.

And since no one wants to entertain you

*ominous music*

It's time to shake things up

If your memory serves you correctly

Michelangelo

Needs a good ass beating

For eating all the homemade cookies that you brought down 

For EVERYONE to enjoy

See the full post

345 notes - Posted August 26, 2022

#4

Laundry Day

@turtle-babe83 got my brain turning about accepting asks, and I'm still not sure I'm ready, however, me and my girl @leosgirl82 conducted an experimental ask.

So, without further ado, I give you my first official "ask" featuring our man in Purple 😘

18+ content - for mature audiences only!

Reblogs only, please!

Laundry Day

Prompts in the ask:

40. Don’t tempt me

53. I’m always in the mood to play, my love

57. Don’t mind me, just enjoying the view

58. I want you so badly…

Man of the hour: Donnie Boy

God.

You were such a flirt.

You were making poor Donnie crazy, and you didn't even know it.

You two had been friends for the last couple of years, after having met accidentally while putting your trash out one night.

Thinking he was in the clear, he had come up topside, having decided on using the manhole cover next to your building. He had come up alone to test some new field equipment for him and his brothers and was setting up a bunch of the equipment when he heard you clear your throat.

He spun around to find you there with your arms crossed looking comically intimidating wearing a zip-up sweatshirt and some pajama shorts - that showcased your legs quite nicely if he did say so himself.

Well shit.

"Hi, uh… I was just…" he said pointing at his homemade equipment and bumbling over his words.

"I see that," you say. "Do you need help?" You ask as you approach the towering terrapin, with zero fear.

And that was it. The rest was history. You became his new buddy.

Over the next couple of years, you spent more time together than most couples. Donnie was extremely greedy over you and your time. He wanted you all to himself, but would never say so outright. He'd just demand you be at his side to help him or keep him company, so no one else could claim you. Not that you minded. His intelligence and wit had you hanging on his every last word. Not to mention he was sexy as hell. But, alas, in fear of making things awkward in your friendship, neither of you had ever pushed for more, despite the unbelievable sexual tension.

He was the cause of your sleepless nights and you were the cause of his daily cold showers.

And it had finally gotten to the point where you needed to let it out somehow.

That somehow ended up being relentless flirting.

See the full post

399 notes - Posted March 12, 2022

#3

The Broken Couch

Second experimental ask coming up! @leosgirl82

Actual prompt list coming soon! 😘

18+ content - for mature audiences only!

Reblogs only, please!

The Broken Couch

Prompts:

16. I’m gonna do the type of things that happen in your dreams.

47. Why can’t I get enough of you?

55. You know exactly what I want.

Man of the hour: Raphael

Raph was gonna be the death of you for sure. Sweet, caring, gentle - very unlike himself, or so his brothers claimed.

It all started a year and a half ago when you met Donnie by accident. You found him treating a wound he had obtained, as he had reached through a broken window, in an attempt to retrieve a communications radio one of his brothers had managed to drop while flipping over the rooftops.

After helping him clean and wrap up the gash, you were also able to stick your small arm into the window and grab said radio.

After that, you became a regular down in the lair, always hanging out with Donnie in his lab to help him with whatever he was working on.

You were very close with the purple-banded turtle, but became quickly enamored with his brute of a brother, talking poor Donnie's ear off about your infatuation and frustration. He was your best friend, after all.

And despite Raphael's rough exterior, he was always soft-spoken and kind to you. Harmless flirting here and there with the occasional light brush of skin.

You did notice how he had started coming around Donnie's lab more and more often as of late, however. Hanging around, joking with his brother, while trying to include you in on the conversations. This did very little to help with your current unrelenting desire for him. It was starting to give you hope, which was a terrible thing, because you knew you were well out of your league. Just look at him.

Your thoughts about him had gone from zero to 100 real fast, and you were suddenly having intense sexual dreams about the sexy, hulking turtle-man.

Little did you know that for more than a year now you'd also been haunting his dreams.

"Why can’t I get enough of you?" He mumbles to himself as he watches you cleaning Donnie's office.

"I don't like her like that, you know," Donnie says.

"What?!" Exclaims Raph, in a hushed voice.

"Look, she's my best friend, yes," says the tall terrapin, who's now leaning in so only his brother can hear him. "But anything beyond that would be… Fucking weird."

Raphael looks at his brother with wide eyes - kind of like he was just caught with his hand in the cookie jar - causing Donnie to let out a low chuckle.

"It's written all over your face, dummy," he says, "you're completely smitten."

Raph lets out a breath he didn't even realize he had been holding and looks at his brother. "Is it that noticeable?" He asks, slightly mortified.

"Is the sun hot?" Donnie retorts.

Raph sighs looking back at your currently bent-over position, making him swallow hard, and needing to readjust himself, before you catch him with a banana in his pocket.

"So what then?" He asks Donnie.

See the full post

442 notes - Posted March 13, 2022

#2

Fulfilling Wishes

Hello Turtle Doves 😘

My insomnia would like to gift you some self-indulgent turtle-men comfort 💙❤️💜🧡🐢

Warning: mentions anxiety, and hints at depression.

NSFW ish? I guess? mostly fluff.

This is my first time attempting Gender Neutral, I apologize for any mistakes.

This was also my first attempt at a Reader x "Your choice of turtle" insert.

Please enjoy my bravery 😂😘🥰

18+ content - for mature audiences only!

Reblogs only, please!

Fulfilling Wishes

It was cold, and the rain pelted down on your bedroom window so loudly that you were unable to sleep.

You missed him.

And it was ridiculous because you had just seen him less than four hours ago while having dinner with him and his family. 

Your family. They had taken you in and accepted you immediately after meeting them all. They had all been your saving grace. But he had been your real hero.

You had met him accidentally when you got lost down a dark back alley, trying to navigate your way home from a new job. Your phone had died, leaving you without the GPS, and an anxiety attack was on the rise. 

No friends. No family. No one to worry about where you were and whether or not you made it home safely.

He seemingly popped up from nowhere as you gasped for the air that refused to stay in your lungs long enough for you to calm down.

After talking to you for a few minutes and asking you some interesting questions, you realized that you were breathing normally again, which made you smile at him.

He smiled back and asked if he could help you get home, which you were incredibly grateful for, and took him up on the offer before he could even finish his question. 

You sighed as you lay there reminiscing and worrying about your vigilante friend and his brothers out in the horrendous weather. 

The longer you thought about all of them, the more you secretly wished he was there with you - all cuddled-up safe and watching a movie, like the two of you always did during the horrible weather. Or after a long shitty day. He was your safety blanket. Always there for you when you needed him.

And he was literally like a blanket. All warm and cuddly. You loved when he had those powerful arms wrapped around you, squeezed up against his chest. The way his steady breathing created the illusion of calming waves as his strong heartbeat erased your anxiety and stress from the long, awful day.

And he had a way with you. When no one else could cheer you up or calm you down, it was always him who knew the right words to say. He knew exactly what you needed emotionally, and he never failed to deliver it in abundance.

You yearned for his gentle touch and to hear his low voice whispering in your ear. You loved the way he would trace his finger down your arm… Or make little designs in the palm of your hand whenever you sat together.

It was always so… Platonic.

And you wished it wasn't.

Because you loved him.

As more than just a friend…

He filled the void in your heart that had almost consumed you all those years ago when you had lost your way - more than down a dark alley.

See the full post

557 notes - Posted August 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

First Kiss HC's

Hello, my Turtle Doves,

Inspiration hit.

Thanks to @leosgirl82 and @turtle-babe83

So, here are my versions of the guy's first kiss with the reader.

18+ content - for mature audiences only!

Reblogs only, please!

First Kiss

Leo

You'll be having a heart-to-heart.

And it's the first time in the seven years you've known him that he's opening up about his feelings.

To you

His best friend whom he has no idea is in love with him

And you're absolutely thrilled that he is trusting you with his vulnerability.

So you're making it absolutely clear that you are listening to every syllable that comes out of his mouth.

He notices how incredibly focused you are as he speaks

How your gaze keeps faltering and falling to his lips

Your glossed-over eyes watching as his tongue wets his suddenly very dry lips.

He's loved you for years but didn't want to push it.

He wanted to be sure his feelings were for real and not just a crush.

And boy were you making him feel real right now.

He pauses in his emotional confession

"Leo?"

God, you're beautiful.

He makes the decision

And you see it in his eyes, the second he does.

His hands come up to cradle your face as he places a gentle kiss on your confused pout.

You let out a small gasp

"Is this ok?" He whispers against your lips.

You nod and he pulls you in for another, this one full of all the love and emotion he's had building for all those years.

See the full post

835 notes - Posted July 4, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[lilxberry]

Hardly Burglar Material - Bilbo Baggins

Requested by: @donniethescienceguy​

Helloooooooo! Can I have a Bilbo x hobbit wife reader where after Thorin insults him (in the beginning when he arrives) she defends him and Thorins like: are you sure it’s the male Baggins we want?

I mean, I still did as what was requested but man, did I not know where tf this was going lmao

I followed quite a bit of the manuscript of the film, the only alteration is when reader confronts Thorin

Warnings: Nothing really. Asshole Thorin. Terrible writing lmao. 

Words: 1,796

Pairings: Bilbo Baggins x Reader (female reader) (wife!reader)

_______________

You hadn’t expected your quiet evening meal with your husband to be interrupted but when a dwarf, a big, burly, tattooed, balding, towering one at that knocks your door, there certainly isn’t much you can do.

After the dwarf, who introduced himself as Dwalin, had entered your home and devoured your husbands fish dinner, to which you offered Bilbo your own meal, more and more knocks sounded at the door, each one miffing your husband further and further until he had finally had enough.

“There’s nobody home!” he shouted as another sound came from the front door, arms holding up the abundance of weapons the two brothers’, Fíli and Kíli, loaded on to him.

You felt terrible, watching as your husband becomes frustrated, not knowing what to do other than spectate in concern.

He tossed the items down out of his arms as he stormed towards the door, shouting at whoever was on the other side. “Go away and bother somebody else! There are far too many dwarves in my dining room as it is.”

Bilbo closes in on the door. “I-I-If this is some plotheads idea of a joke,” he laughed in disbelief before grasping the door handle in his hand. “I can only say, it is in very poor taste.”

With that, he pulled the door open and in comes tumbling through the doorway a cluster of dwarves, all grumbling and whining at the other to get off of them. Bilbo and yourself, who stood a few steps behind, looked down at the mess of moving bodies on the floor before his feet, dumbfounded expressions on both of your faces.

Movement behind the pile up caught both yours and Bilbos’ attention, and once the tall figure bent down ever so slightly to reveal himself, your face twisted into that of utter confusion as your husband sighs in exasperation.

“Gandalf.”

_______________

Although you were concerned for your husband, you couldn’t help but find the whole situation quite amusing. You found some of the dwarven folk that had invaded your shared home to be quite a fun, entertaining bunch.

Of course, you were concerned about the possessions within your home, hoping that the dwarves leave your home relatively untouched and that your husband wouldn’t have some sort of mental breakdown.

Your uninvited guests had pillaged the pantry of its food. The race of dwarves certainly did have quite an appetite. Even Gandalf had nibbled on quite a bit of food.

The rowdiness of the dwarves had calmed slightly, if only for moment when they downed whatever drink they had. Even the ridiculous and frankly disgusting belching afterwards was calmer than their initial arrival.

Yet that was quickly replaced with plates, platers, knives, forks, and spoons were tossed from one dwarf to another as they sang a merry tune. Bilbo was quick with demanding caution and for things to be put down. Even you were slightly worried for your kitchen utensils.

The dwarves released hearty laughter when you and Bilbo peered into the kitchen and had seen that everything was clean and stacked, Gandalf chuckling along with them as both you and Bilbo simultaneously release sighs of relief.

Then, the atmosphere became tense as three, loud knocks sound at your front door for a final time that night.

The laughter died out instantly and Gandalf spoke quite ominously. “He’s here.”

_______________

You couldn’t really pinpoint what exactly was unsettled you so much when it came to the dark-haired dwarf who sat at the head of the table. Maybe his stature. Possibly his stoic expression.

Most likely the look behind his eyes.

Well, you certainly didn’t like him all that much whenever he addressed your husband.

Most of the conversation between the dwarves and Gandalf became muffled when reaching your ears, certainly seeing no point in listening in on their talk. The second your husbands voice rang out through the room though had piqued your interest and your attention was brought to the conversation.

They spoke of The Lonely Mountain, the dragon Smaug, how they were on a quest to reclaim their home. Gandalf had produced not only a map of some forts but a key, a key the dwarves seemed to become quite excited about.

You also happened to admire the young dwarfs’ courage. Ori.

Then, the topic of a burglar arrived.

“That’s why we need a burglar,” Ori spoke.

“Hmm, and a good one too. An expert I’d imagine.” Bilbo moves back from peering down at the map, holding on to his suspenders.

“And are you?”

Bilbo glances around to behind him before looking towards the dwarves once more. “Am I what?”

“He said he’s an expert!” Oin spoke cheerily. Of course, the dwarf with the horn to aid his hearing would say as such.

“Me? No, no, no, no, no,” your husband started, eyes darting to each dwarf, hoping his point would get across. “I’m not a burglar. I’ve never stolen a thing in my life.”

You nodded your head in agreement. As much as you love your husband, he is quite the stickler for following rules.

“I’m afraid I have to agree with Mister Baggins,” Balin was next to speak. “He’s hardly burglar material.”

You supressed a chuckle as Bilbo, although relieved that someone agreed, looked the tiniest bit offended.

The group of dwarves began to chatter and raise in volume, no words could actually be comprehended by yourself, it all a jumble of noises. Then Gandalf raised out of the seat slightly, his voice booming over the racket the dwarves created.

“ENOUGH! IF I SAY BILBO BAGGINS IS A BURGLAR,” he lowered his voice with each following word. “Then a burglar he is.” Bilbo looked as if he wanted to protest but no words left his mouth.

“Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet,” he continued. “In fact, they can pass by unseen by most if they chose. And while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of a Hobbit is all but unknown to them which gives us an distinct advantage.”

The whole discussion about your husband was unnerving for you. You disliked how your husband was talked of like a ploy in some silly game.

“This quest is no place for gentlefolk.” Thorins’ tone was as if the words left a vile taste in his mouth, clearly showing his disgust for your husband. “He probably wouldn’t last 5 miles away from his precious little home. Look at him, Gandalf! He isn’t made for such things, it’s as clear as day. His big feet and rounded belly would slow us down. Your little Hobbit would cry out for home within a day.”

Your blood boiled with each word he spoke, an anger rising in you which you desperately tried to keep down. Your nails dug into the palms of your hands and your jaw was clenched tightly shut, but enough was enough.

“HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF MY HUSBAND LIKE THAT?! NO LESS WHILST YOU ARE IN HIS HOME AND IN HIS PRESENCE!”

Your outburst caught the attention of every soul in the dining room around the table. Their eyes settled on your figure that stepped closer and closer to them up to the point where you stood glaring down at Thorin right beside his seat. Even Bilbos’ eyes were wide and looked almost ready to pop right out of their sockets.

“My husband may not be a fighter like you…you BRASS DWARVES! But he deserves no less respect. I will not stand for someone speaking down on my Bilbo in such a manner, even if they are some king,” you all but spat out.

Some of the dwarves looked offended that you spoke to their leader in such a way, others looked thoroughly shocked, surprised that a small thing as yourself had such a fire in you. Gandalf smirked as Bilbo looked like he genuinely feared for your safety. He had witnessed outbursts from you that scared him before, which were quite rare, you barely losing your temper, but for once, he was terrified of the consequences seeing as it wasn’t at him nor a fellow Hobbit.

But it was Thorins’ reaction that had you confused. He seemed…impressed?

Thorin turned towards Gandalf, a smirk of his own forming on his face. “Are you sure it was Mister Baggins you had wanted to join our quest?”

Gandalf chuckled and looked towards you and your husband, you now joined your side, who was silently scolding you with his eyes but nonetheless remaining the concerned, dotting husband. “I was certain on Mister Baggins being the 14th member of your company, but I would highly recommend you take a 15th as I believe Misses Baggins certainly has something of her own to bring to the quest.”

“They both have a great deal more to offer than any of you know, including themselves. You must trust me on this,” Gandalf finished.

Thorin looked at Gandalf and Gandalf at he for a moment, Thorin evidently mulling it over within his head before finally, he spoke. “Very well. We’ll do it your way. Give them the contract.”

Both yourself and Bilbo began to protest as Balin produced the document. He handed it over to Bilbo who unravelled the parchment and began to scan over the words, your eyes peering over his shoulder to read it for yourself.

As Bilbo and you busied yourselves with reading over the document, Thorin had leant over towards Gandalf to whisper within his ear. “I cannot guarantee their safety.”

“Understood,” Gandalf hummed in acknowledgement.

“You’ll be left responsible for their fate.”

“Agreed.”

Bilbo began to read aloud the text, brow furrowed out of concentration, your own face screwed up slightly, straining to peer at the words.

“Terms; cash on delivery up to but not exceeding 1 14th for total profit, if any. Seems fair, uhh-“

“Shouldn’t it be changed to 1 15th if I were to join?” you questioned aimlessly.

Bilbo nodded his head in agreement before continuing. “Present company shall not be liable for injuries inflicted by or sustained as a government, thereof including but not limited to; lacerations. Evisceration?” He unfolds a piece further, reading before looking towards the group with a look of disbelief. “Incineration?!”

“Oh, aye. It’d melt the flesh off your bones in the blink of an eye,” Bofur quipped with ease.

Many more ‘encouraging and reassuring’ words were spoken by Bofur, unnerving both yourself and Bilbo, though you hid it extremely well. The moment your husband passed out, was when Bofur seemed to finally relent.

“Oh dear.” You looked towards your husband laying on the floor unconscious with concern before turning towards the others with a worried expression.

Valar forbid you allow him to go with those dwarves and that conniving wizard alone.

_______________

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I mean, I don’t really have anything to say sooooo

If you want to be added to a taglist lemme know

Anywho, I hope you enjoy

As always, constructive criticism and requests are welcomed and greatly appreciated :D

_______________

LOTR / The Hobbit taglist:

@iwazoomingouttahere​ 

[helloalycia]

The Wrong Lifetime — Ten // Wanda Maximoff

chapter nine | story masterlist | main masterlist | wattpad | chapter eleven

author’s note: okay so this was supposed to be published yesterday but (if anyone cares lol), basically, i finished my last year of uni two days ago and so yesterday was the first official day i had that i didn’t have to do work, so i spent the whole day playing video games 😂 but it’s here now, so i hope you liked it!

Approaching Y/B/N's study, my annoyance returned when I remembered how he acted only an hour before. I didn't bother knocking as I let myself in, seeing him loosening his bow tie and looking out the window.

"What the hell was that?" I snapped instantly.

He sighed, yanking his bow tie off and throwing it to his desk. "What was what?"

I crossed my arms to contain my frustration. "You know what, Y/B/N." He continued to play dumb, so I watched him with a frown. "Why are you so against me getting published? I thought– I thought you'd be proud of me. It's all I've ever wanted."

With a scowl, he looked the other way. "I'm the writer, Y/N, not you."

His words created an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach. Jealousy was a disgusting look on him, one I never wanted to see.

"No," I said, uncrossing my arms and staring daggers at him. "You're not the writer. I am. You only got noticed because of me!"

"Shut up!" he shouted, finally meeting my eyes. "You don't get to do this! It's not about you!"

"Yes, it is!" I shouted right back. "For once, it is about me, Y/B/N! Because this is my chance to do something I love."

He rolled his eyes, getting riled up all over again. "And that's another thing. Why the hell are you putting silly ideas into my fiancé's head about making money? Are you trying to make me a fool in front of my in-laws?"

I squeezed my fists together, narrowing my eyes. "They aren't your in-laws."

"Oh, you know what I mean!"

He didn't deserve Wanda. He couldn't. She was too good for him.

"Sorry that your masculinity is so fragile that you can't let your fiancé do something she's passionate about," I said through gritted teeth.

He glowered down at me. "You need to butt out."

I smiled bitterly. "Maybe if you didn't start on Pietro for no reason, I would."

He scoffed. "Please. That man is only trying to get into your pants."

I don't think I'd ever wanted to strangle my brother as much as I did right now. Did he really not believe in me? He couldn't accept that maybe I'd earned this on my own accord? Thankfully, unlike him, I could contain my emotions and managed to swallow down my anger.

"You know that's not the case," I said with a dangerously calm voice. "You should talk about your soon-to-be brother-in-law with some respect."

Y/B/N sighed, moving to sit at his desk. I followed him with my eyes, unable to recognise who he was. I hadn't dubbed him for the insecure type, but I was being proven wrong many times tonight.

"I don't want to do this right now," he said quietly, sinking his head into his hands.

I uncurled my fists, fed up. "It's already been done."

He looked up, but I didn't wait to see his face. Maybe he wasn't the brother I thought he was.

—

"Honest opinion," Wanda said, before revealing herself from behind the curtain. "Nice or ugly?"

"Nice."

She smiled brightly, twirling around in the dress she was trying on, before going back behind the curtain to change into another one. She'd invited me over to hers to hang out, which meant watching her try on a bunch of new dresses and getting excited over each one. I wasn't complaining.

"So, that first book," she picked up from our previous conversation as she changed. She was referring to Y/B/N's first published book. "That was really you?"

"Yep." I pulled my legs up onto the lounge sofa and leaned on my hand, elbow propped on the back of the seat. "I mean, it got edited of course, but the initial manuscript was mine."

"Wow," she commented. "That must have really sucked to hear everybody praise it when it was actually yours."

"It did indeed."

She came out from the curtain wearing a dress that wasn't particularly nice looking. It had a baggy torso and slim legs, making Wanda look very unflattering. And that was saying something – she could pull off anything.

"Nice or ugly?" she asked, hands on her hips.

I squinted, tilting my head and trying to think if I should lie or not. Her blue eyes peered down at me intimidatingly and I knew I couldn't find it in myself to lie to her.

After a moment, I released a breath. "I'm sorry, love, but it's kind of ugly."

She chuckled, giving me a knowing smile. "Good. This was a test. Means you're paying attention."

"Wow. You think I'm just sat here for fun?"

She didn't respond, but an amused smile was on her lips as she headed behind the curtain to change yet again. It was quiet as she was changing, before she spoke up again.

"You know when we first met? And you showed me around your room?"

"How can I forget? You thought I was jealous of my brother," I quipped with a smile.

I could imagine the eye roll she was giving me. "That was before I knew you wrote half his stuff."

Stifling a laugh, I nodded even though she couldn't see me. "Okay, go on."

She sighed. "I told you how I fell in love with that first book. How I fell in love with the words. And the person who wrote those words.”

"I remember."

She reappeared from behind the curtain, this time wearing a stunning floral blue sundress. It fell off her shoulders, revealing cream-coloured skin and a well-defined collarbone. I smiled softly, overwhelmed with admiration for the beautiful woman before me.

"I'm glad it was you," she said, and I suddenly remembered we were in the middle of a conversation.

Her eyes sparkled brightly as she smiled my way, and then her words sank in and my heart fluttered with adoration.

"Me, too," I breathed out.

She held my gaze for a second longer before looking down at her dress, pressing her hands over it. "So. What do you think? Nice or ugly?"

I raised my eyebrows with astonishment. "Wanda, you look absolutely beautiful."

Her shoulders relaxed as her eyes flickered to mine. "So, I should keep it?"

I spluttered, "Duh!"

She laughed, before approaching me and sitting beside me. Leaning her head on my shoulder, she pulled her legs onto the sofa and sighed contently. I wrapped an arm around her, resting my cheek on her head.

"I'm glad you'll finally get the recognition you deserve, milaya (darling)," she said, lifting her hand to intertwine it with mine over her shoulder.

With an entertained smile, I held her hand firmly. "Maybe, love. I haven't said yes."

"Oh, you'll say yes."

I pressed a kiss to the top of her head, revelling in the warmth her body created as it pressed to mine. We had no concerns that somebody would catch us since nobody was home and the servants knew not to bother us.

"So, what was the book actually about?" she asked, playing with my fingers.

"Huh?"

"The book," she repeated. "I've heard Y/B/N's take on it, but what about yours?"

At the mention of my brother, I rolled my eyes. We still hadn't spoken since our argument and I wasn't exactly in the best place with him right now.

"It doesn't matter," I mumbled into her hair.

She used her elbow to nudge me gently in the stomach before grabbing my other hand and wrapping it around her waist.

"I like hearing you speak," she said softly. "And I love the way your mind works."

My cheeks flushed at the compliment, but I appreciated her words. She always had such an effect on me and I'd come to only care about one opinion nowadays – hers.

"Okay, I guess..." I sighed, subconsciously pressing my fingertips to hers. "The book is about a man who loses his wife to his own ignorance, right?" She hummed in agreement, so I continued. "Y/B/N always talks about how it's about a man failing to appreciate his wife, but that's not how I intended for it to be perceived."

Interest piqued, she sat up straight and turned around to face me, leaning her head on my chest and looking up with curious eyes. I smiled down at her, pressing a kiss to her nose, making her scrunch it up adorably.

"It's supposed to be about the wife discovering that she's her own woman and that she doesn't need her husband to be okay," I continued, holding her gaze. "It was her own self-discovery that pushed them apart, as well her husband's stupidity."

Wanda's lips curved into a gentle smile. "I like that interpretation a lot better than his."

Licking my lips, I breathed out through a smile. "You're biased, dear."

Her eyes flickered to my lips. "Maybe."

I chuckled before closing the gap between us, connecting our lips in a short, sweet kiss. She relaxed against me before smiling as we pulled away.

"Ya lyublyu vas (I love you)," she whispered.

I always loved when she spoke in her native tongue. She sounded so at peace when she did and it warmed my insides.

"I love you, too," I whispered right back.

She grinned, carefree, before turning to lean on my shoulder again. I held her, enjoying the silence that formed between us. Her presence was always enough and I never wanted anything more. But I knew Wanda and I knew that she couldn't stay quiet for too long, so something was definitely up.

"What are you thinking?" I asked quietly, not wanting to startle her in case she was too deep into her thoughts.

She sighed. "It's stupid."

I smiled. "I doubt that."

It went quiet and I assumed she didn't want to share, but then she played with my fingers again as she spoke.

"I was wondering what it would be like if we were able to get married," she murmured. "With the dresses and walking down the aisle and the rings."

I laced my fingers through hers, the thoughts having crossed my mind at times, too. It was nice to think 'what if', but it was also a dangerous game.

"The wedding cake would have to be chocolate," I played along, not wanting her to think she couldn't talk about it.

She snickered, loosening up in my arms. "Of course. And the colour scheme would have to be red."

"Definitely," I agreed, knowing she wouldn't have it any other way, "...it could be somewhere small but comfortable. Surrounded by nature, maybe."

"Yes. With flowers all around us and the sound of birds tweeting in the trees."

A comforting smile crept on my lips as I closed my eyes, imagining it in my mind. What a beautiful day it would be.

"I'd force Pietro to be the ring bearer," she added as an afterthought, and I laughed, chest moving up and down with her on it.

"He'd hate that," I pointed out.

"Exactly," she said with a mischievous hum.

I rolled my eyes playfully. "What about afterwards? Where would you want to live?"

She scrunched her face up before settling with, "Somewhere remote. Away from people. Maybe a nice cottage somewhere."

Nodding in agreement, I said, "We could have a beautiful garden in the back. I'd do my very best to make it perfect for you. And you could paint whatever you wanted there."

A considerate smile tugged at her lips at the thought. "Yes! And we could get a pet. I've always wanted a pet."

"I guess we could... what pet do you want?"

With no hesitation, she said, "Chickens."

I looked down at her, quirking a brow. "Chickens?"

Looking up at me, she stared like it was self-explanatory. "They're cute and they lay eggs. Think about it. Fresh eggs for breakfast every morning."

God, she was so cute. I smiled, squeezing her hand. "Chickens it is, love."

She got excited as she tugged on my hand. "You can finally get a study of your own!"

"And you can get your own studio," I added, making her grin.

"And I'd keep it sparkling clean."

I laughed, shaking my head. "Don't lie, Wanda."

She rolled her eyes, though wore a humoured expression. "Okay, maybe not..."

"You can keep it as messy as you want," I promised her, as if it was actually going to happen and we'd get what we wanted.

The dream was so vivid in my mind that it could have been a memory. Wanda and I living together, peacefully and without hiding... if only we weren't in the wrong lifetime.

"I like to pretend that you gave this to me," she said after an unsettling silence fell upon us, raising her left hand for me to see. She wiggled her ring finger, the silver band and emerald gem glinting in the light. "It makes me feel better."

I swallowed hard and forced a smile, intertwining my fingers in hers and bringing them to my lips to kiss gently.

"Technically I picked it," I reminded her to lighten the mood, but it didn't work.

A sad smile appeared on her face. "Maybe in another lifetime, we could have met in a world that allowed this."

My smile faded into a frown at her words. Like I said, considering the 'what if's' was a dangerous game, and we'd already played too much of it.

"You're going to marry my brother soon," I said quietly, the realisation hitting me. "This– us, will have to stop."

She sat up and turned to face me, eyes looking between mine as she shook her head. "It doesn't have to."

I rested a hand on her cheek and she leaned into it, kissing my palm. I savoured the feeling of her lips against my skin.

"What we're doing isn't fair on either of us," I said reluctantly, afraid to say what we'd avoided for as long as our relationship lasted.

She frowned. "I'd rather have you like this than not at all."

My heart ached because I knew she was being genuine, and the truth is, I felt the same. But that brought me to our next dilemma.

"It's not fair on Y/B/N either."

She tensed her jaw. "The world doesn't want us together, Y/N. They're the ones who forced us to be like this."

"Like what?" I asked with knowing eyes. "Cheaters?"

Her eyes glossed over and it broke me to see her so hurt.

"Is it really cheating if I never wanted to be with him?" she asked with a shaky voice. "If I'm only acting out of duty? If I never loved him?"

Realising I'd saddened her, I moved forward and pulled her in for a hug, running my hand down her hair and to her back. "Sorry... I didn't mean to make you upset."

She sniffled and I felt her tears soaking my shirt. "Don't talk like that... I don't want to lose you."

I swallowed hard, nodding into her shoulder. "I don't want to lose you either, Wanda."

But I knew that deep down, we couldn't hold onto everything we wanted to in life. Deep down, she must have known that, too.

—

"...and this is where we write up the contracts. It's where we'd write up yours if you say yes."

Pietro grinned cheekily as I gave him a knowing look. He was showing me around the publishing house – a proper tour, not just me lurking around on the few visits I'd been here for Y/B/N – with hopes of convincing me to sign a contract with him.

"Pietro, you said you wouldn't be biased," Wanda warned, and I gave her a grateful smile as Pietro chuckled.

"I'm sorry, I can't help it," he apologised, though he definitely didn't mean it. "I just really think you'd be a great fit here, Y/N. I already have editors willing to work with you based on the few pages they've seen of your work."

I raised my eyebrows, startled. "Wow, seriously?"

He nodded. "Most definitely. As I told you the other night, you're talented. And with my help, you can be successful, too."

A smile fell on my lips uncontrollably. A real editor wanted to work with me. Woah.

"I'm gonna get some coffee," Wanda said, squeezing my shoulder. "I'll get you both some, too." She wagged a finger towards her brother. "Don't pressure her whilst I'm gone."

He raised his hands in defence. "Okay, calm down, sestra (sister). I'll be fair."

She lowered her finger, shot him a final look, then smiled at me before leaving for the café next door. I chuckled at how cute she was and how much she cared before returning my attention to Pietro.

"I won't pressure you," he said to me, perching on the edge of an empty desk. "I just want you to know that you'd be well looked after here. I wouldn't let anyone talk down to you, nor treat you with disrespect because you're a woman. I don't condone that here."

I relaxed at his words, offering him a grateful smile. "Thank you, Pietro. That really means a lot."

He returned the smile before his gaze moved over my shoulder. Smile fading, he cleared his throat awkwardly and looked away. I turned around, curious to what had caught his attention, and then I saw Y/B/N standing in the doorway, looking around for something. His eyes eventually fell on me and he perked up before heading our way.

I hadn't spoken to him since two nights ago after dinner. He'd actively avoided me, too and I wasn't complaining, having still harboured an unexplainable anger for him. What was he doing here?

"Y/N, hey," he said awkwardly, stopping before Pietro and I. His eyes flickered to Pietro before he asked me, "Can I speak with you?"

Instinctively, my jaw clenched and he seemed to notice as he shook his head quickly.

"Not to argue," he clarified. "Just to talk."

His eyes were pleading and I couldn't find it in myself to deny him. He was my brother after all, we couldn't argue forever. Nodding wordlessly, I smiled apologetically to Pietro before following Y/B/N to a quiet side of the room. My eyes ran along the many employees working away at their desks before falling to my brother before me.

"What is it?" I asked, maybe a little too harshly, but there was no going back now.

He frowned, eyes flittering around nervously. "I want to apologise for my behaviour the other night. I shouldn't have acted how I did."

I hugged myself as I shifted my weight between my feet. "Okay."

"You were right," he continued, finally meeting my eyes. "You deserve this. You've always been there for me, helping me with my writing when I needed it. I should have reacted better, but I let my jealousy get the better of me."

My mouth opened, surprised at his apology.

He offered me a sad smile. "The truth is, Y/N, we both know you'll be the more successful of us both. And you'll be so preoccupied with your own writing that you won't be able to help me anymore. And it was selfish of me to think that first, but I did. And I shouldn't have. I'm sorry. I'm your big brother and I should've been better."

Chewing on my lip, I let go of waist and straightened up, nodding slightly. "I– thanks. Thank you. For telling me that."

His shoulders relaxed as he nodded. "Also, you were right about what you said about Wanda. And I'm going to apologise to her first thing."

My expression softened at the mention of the girl who'd only ever been good to us. "She's seriously talented, Y/B/N."

"I know."

I nodded, stepping forward and resting a hand on his shoulder. Looking between his eyes, I only saw regret and I knew he was being genuine with his apology.

"You're forgiven," I told him with a small smile, before pulling him in for a quick hug.

He returned it and I felt relieved to know he was supportive. I didn't see a reason to not accept Pietro's deal now... everybody I cared about was okay with it.

"Wanda is here by the way," I told Y/B/N when we pulled apart. "She's just getting some coffee for us."

He nodded and we returned to Pietro, who gave me a concerned look. I smiled reassuringly and he relaxed before looking to my brother with a smile.

"Hey, Pietro, sorry for what I said last night," Y/B/N was quick to say. "It wasn't cool. I know you're not like that and I shouldn't have even thought it, let alone said it."

Pietro was one of the chillest people I'd met as he offered his hand out to my brother. "No worries, mate. Bygones."

They exchanged a handshake before my brother glanced to me.

"She's really good," he said to Pietro. "You'd be lucky to have her here."

My face heated up as Pietro nodded in agreement. The two of them looked to me with proud smiles and as uncomfortable as I felt with the attention, I was grateful to have their support.

"I know," Pietro said. "All she's got to do is say yes."

"You haven't said yes yet?" my brother asked with disbelief, before slapping me on the arm playfully. "Y/N! This is your chance!"

"And it's a big decision!" I reminded him.

He looked like he wanted to say something, but then I caught sight of Wanda over his shoulder and perked up. She smiled my way but then noticed Y/B/N's presence and proceeded with caution.

"Hey, I got you both a coffee," she said, giving Pietro his and handing me mine, but her eyes were searching mine with worry.

My hand brushed hers as I accepted my coffee and I squeezed it reassuringly. She seemed to believe me as her lips twitched into a small smile before looking to Y/B/N.

"Hey," she said to him quietly, biting her lip.

He glanced to me for encouragement and I gave him a subtle thumbs up. This seemed to help as he wiped his hands on his trousers before looking to Wanda hopefully.

"Hey," he finally spoke. "Please can we talk in private for a moment?"

She nodded, humming in response, and followed him to talk.

"Match made in heaven those two," Pietro said sarcastically, and I tried not to laugh, but damn was it funny.

"Look, I think I've made a decision," I said after a moment, feeling my heart speed up at the realisation of my next words.

"Oh? And what is it? Will you let me publish you?" Pietro asked, quirking a brow and watching me with an excited smile.

Well, there was only the future to look forward to now.

I grinned. "Yes."

[salty-rey]

Singing for the Troops

Pairing: Fives x Reader

Words: 3948

Warnings: Fluff! Open-ending (sexual mention???)

A/N: Hello everyone! This is the first time I do a fic for Star Wars, so I apologize in advance if I mislabeled certain ships. Or if I didn’t do the boys’ personalities any justice. 

I was inspired by old performances/entertainment for the Allied troops in WWII, and after watching Christina Aguilera’s Candyman music video. Then I thought, “do the clones get any kind of entertainment like this?” So I took it upon myself to make a fan fic!

Hope you guys like it!

I don’t know how to end a fic....

Playlist: Something’s Got a Hold On Me | Candyman | Ain’t No Other Man

Your dream is to become a famous singer, and you have been working hard for years to reach this goal. You have been visiting various bars and cantinas, singing for patrons whenever the owner allowed it. Even if you were paid or not, you still sang. If a bar had an open mic night, you were there. Out of all the bars you’ve been to, 79s has always been a favorite. It was always packed, and the owner was happy to have you sing for the guests. It always brought more patrons, which meant more money for the establishment. Plus, you were even paid, unlike previous locations. 

After a few months of you visiting 79s, you attracted the attention of a particular ARC trooper. When you finished your playlist of songs, both originals and covers, you were given a glass of whiskey. 

“Compliments from the ARC trooper,” the droid server told you before gesturing to the said trooper in blue. 

Looking over, you spotted the clone who raised their glass to you, sending a wink your way. Even though they all share the same face, this clone had a distinctive number tattoo on the side of his head and a classic goatee hugging his chin. It wasn’t the first time that someone bought a drink for you. Troopers before had attempted to grab your attention, even tried to get lucky for a night, but you brushed them off. But there was something about this trooper that was welcoming. Perhaps the way he smiled at you or the way he spoke to you. He was causal yet not dull. Flirty, too but it didn’t make you uncomfortable. You become bashful at his witty comments. It felt as though the two of you were long-time friends. 

The ARC Trooper introduced himself as Fives and greeted you to his fellow brothers. There, you met Echo, Jesse, Kix, and Hardcase. They all serve under Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker, aka “Skyguy,” as to how Padawan Learner Ahsoka Tano calls him. They had stories to share with you; their missions on other planets engrossed you. In turn, you told them about your dreams to become a singer. 

“It’s silly, I know. Been lectured by my parents for years.” You lightly laughed, only to become surprised at the boys’ reactions.

“No dream is silly!” “Anyone who says otherwise is just jealous of your voice!” “I don’t know what it’s like to have parents, but they should be supportive of you.”

“If that’s your dream, then go after it. To kriff what other people say.” Fives huffed before fully turning to you. “Who can say that they had dreams but didn’t achieve them because they thought it was unrealistic? I’m going to see you on a big stage one day, and I’m going to say, “That’s our songbird.” Because you will always have us cheering you on.” The trooper said with a soft smile.

A blush crept onto your face, and a smile was spreading cheek to cheek. “Thanks, Fives!”

After that night, you and the boys exchanged your private commlinks. Soon enough than anyone would like, they were shipped back to the battlefield. While they were away, if there were any downtime between missions and work, you would hear your holoprojector beeping. You spent hours talking to each trooper, glad to see that they were doing well. Fives was the one who spent the most time with you, almost talking the night away. He would only stop when he saw your head dipping and your eyes blinking to stay awake.

“Go to sleep, songbird. I’ll talk to you as soon as I can. With any luck, we should be landing back to Coruscant within the month.” So fives said, his holo-imagine occasionally flickering due to the distance. 

After letting out a yawn, you rubbed your eyes and smile at him. “Okay. Be safe out there, okay?”

“Anything for my songbird,” Fives smirked. He then bid you goodnight with a soft smile, and he was gone. 

Within the month, the 501st had returned to Coruscant, and you met up with the boys back at 79s. The bar 79s was packed as usual, especially on a weekend evening. Troopers from all kinds of battalions were here, drinking and dancing, retelling stories with their brothers and civilians. The music was pumping, and the dance floor was full of slightly or fully intoxicated soldiers. 

Tight hugs and smiles were exchanged when you were reunited with the boys at the bar before entering and finding an empty booth for you all to sit. Echo had left the table to get everyone their drinks as you and boys caught up. 

“I heard that there this campaign being made for singers by singers and that they want to sing for you troopers.” So you told them, raising for your a bit so that they can hear you over the music. 

Singing for the Troops was a campaign created by independent singers on Coruscant. Singers who supported the clones and believed that the troops deserve a moment of peace and perhaps experience some form of normality, which may be entirely new to them. What clone can say that they have been to a concert? Plus, it would give the artists a moment to shine and perhaps score big with a sponsor. It’s a win-win situation! 

“The campaign reached several Republic-allied planets, encouraging other singers to sign up. Not just that, but it’s was being crowdfunded, and it reached its price goal! Also, I heard that a famous singer is the main supporter of the campaign,” you informed as Echo passed around everyone’s drinks.

“You should sign up!” Kix said after taking a sip of his drink.

“I don’t know. I never sang for a large crowd. Let alone been off-world.” You replied nervously, your hands fiddling with the glass of liquor.

“That never stopped you singing at bars!” Hardcase responded before downing his drink in one gulp. 

“Just imagine that you’re singing to us! We already have the same faces.” Jesse joked before wincing at the sudden punch to the shoulder. 

“Look, songbird; you’re a great singer. And you’ve sung in front of countless drunken troops. So singing in front of a bunch of sober soldiers will be easy,” Fives chimed in, leaning forward and resting his arms on the table. “All those other singers will be lucky to have you join them.” He said before winking, a smirk on his face.

Your cheeks felt warm, and it wasn’t because of the liquor. “Thanks, Fives.” A soft smile formed on your lips, happy to hear his compliments. You then sighed before downing the rest of your drink. “Alright. I’ll do it!”

“Alright. A toast to (Y/N)!” Kix cheered, raising his glass, and the rest joined in. 

The next day, you wasted no time in signing up for a chance to sing in the campaign. The requirements are to submit a recording of your singing, and if you are selected, you will receive a message at the earliest notice. When you waited for a response, you and the boys roam the upper mid-levels of Coruscant, taking time to hang out before the boys were shipped back to war. It always felt bittersweet saying goodbye, but you knew that it wouldn’t be for long. 

It will be much longer. 

Arriving at your apartment from working your day job, you noticed that your holoprojector was blinking; someone left a message for you. A tightening sensation was felt in the pit of your stomach, your heart racing as you approached your holoprojector. You stared at the blinking light. Did one of the boys leave a message for you? No, they know your schedule, so it possible it isn’t them. 

Is it from the campaign? Your heart hammered hard against your ribcage as your hand reached over. Then, what felt like many minutes, you finally pressed the button, the image of a well-dressed man appearing. 

“Evening, miss (Y/N). I am the manager of the campaign Singing for the Troops, and I’m here to congratulate you. You have been selected to be one of our singers! We hope to hear from you soon.” The recording ended with a courtesy bow from the man, leaving you standing there in shock. 

Did he just say that you were accepted? Does that mean you get to go off-world and sing?!

A squeal of joy echoed throughout your apartment, you jumping in place. “I did it!!” You cheered before reaching for your holoprojector. You had to tell the boys! You had to tell Fives!

After several minutes to reach them, no one answered your calls. Your smile slowly turned into a frown before sighing in defeat. “They’re at war, (Y/N)... they’re probably outside of their base. I’ll just leave them a message about the good news.” 

Later in the day, you contacted the campaign manager and agreed to meet with them for further instruction. The plan was to visit various battalions and sing for them during downtime. It will be difficult, and the campaign will have to plan, seeing battalion will go first. During those long weeks of planning, meeting other artists, and vocal practices, there still was no response from the boys. It wouldn’t be the first time you didn’t hear from Fives and the others, although you couldn’t help but worry. 

“Once everyone arrives onto Coruscant, we will first visit the 104th Battalion,” the campaign manager informed everyone via holoprojector. 

“The Wolfpack Co.,” you whispered to yourself. Fives told you about this battalion, having pointed a couple of them out back at 79’s. Fives said to you that the unit within the 104th was a serious, no-nonsense type of group. Entertaining this group and the rest of the battalion will be a challenge. 

The manager continued to list other battalions and legions until one of them caught your attention. “501st and finally, the 212th.” 

“Bottom of the list...” You whispered, frowning lightly. How long will it take for you to reach the 501st Legion? 

The meeting concluded with a buzz of excitement. It was happening. For reals! In a few days, you will be flying out of Coruscant for the first time, following your dreams. 

Before the faithful day could arrive, you decided to reach the boys once more. You sat with anticipation, your knee bouncing as you waited for someone to answer. Finally, after several beeps, the projector came to life, and standing before you was Fives. 

“Fives! Thank the Maker,” you sighed in relief before glaring up at him. “Why hasn’t anyone returned my messages?”

The ARC Trooper lightly winced at your tone before smiling apologetically. “Sorry, songbird. The mission was a lot tougher than we first thought. But we finally liberated the planet from Separatist control. The boys and I are fine. I’m sorry for worrying you.” He said, frowning and eyes cast downward.

You opened your mouth to speak before shutting, looking away as well. “No, it’s not your fault. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped at you. We’re at war, and I know that you won’t always be there for our calls. I just....” You began to say but couldn’t finish your sentence.

“I know.” Fives stared at you, eyebrows knitted. “(Y/N)?” Looking back up, he was now smiling at you ever so sweetly that it made you blush. “Congrats on getting picked. I knew you would get in.”

You blinked up at the ARC trooper before smiling. The two of you spend a couple of hours talking, quickly making up for the lost time. You told him the battalions that you were going to visit, and he groaned in annoyance. “Why do we have to be at the bottom of the list?”

“I guess the 104th battalion are in dire need to put some smile on their faces—especially that sourpuss Wolffe.” You teased, causing Fives to laugh. 

“That’s going to be one hell of a challenge. I don’t think I saw Commander Wolffe smile before.”

“I welcome a challenge. And I’ll sure be the one to turn his scowl into a grin.” You puffed out your chest in pride.

Fives chuckles at your comical posture, lightly shaking his head. “If anyone can, it’s you.” You relax, returning to an upright position, looking back up at the trooper. The two of you stare at each other in silence, observing each other’s features. 

His armor was scuffed and dirtied. There are new scratches and dents throughout, roughing his paint job. His face looked tired, yet there was a glow in his eyes, staring at you in what it appears to be loving. 

“I can’t wait to see you again, pretty girl,” Fives spoke, breaking the silence.

That was a new nickname, and it caused you to blush once more. Despite feeling embarrassed, you smiled back. “Me too. Take care, okay?”

“Anything for my songbird,” he repeated all those weeks ago. 

.

.

.

.

Who knew participating in a singing campaign would last for so long. Then again, the war is still going on, so landing on Star Destroyers only happens when the surrounding area was safe. But it was all worth it. Seeing the joy on the troops’ faces and feeling their excitement as the music vibrated throughout the hanger was rewarding.

Working with the manager and group of artists was a great experience as well. Many of the singers were friendly, sharing their stories of how they got into music. Many of them were humans; one was a Twi’lek, another was a Pantoran, and a couple more alien species. Listening to them sing in their native tongue was thrilling, giving you goosebumps at the realization that there are so many cultures out there. So much more for you to learn, and what better place than here. 

As the list of locations was getting shorter, you felt more nervous and excited as you got closer to the 501st legion. You were going to see Fives and the others soon. It’s been months since you last saw them. I tried staying in touch with them via holoprojector, but it was getting more complicated since you were busy as well. But that will all change as you near the Star Destroyer that the famous boys in blue occupied. Although, you were nervous for an entirely different reason. You would do something big, having already talked about it to the manager, band, and fellow singers would help be your backup singers. You’re taking a big chance, and there’s no turning back now. 

The ship that you and the rest of the artist travel on docked, allowing the whole group to exit. The hangar will house the concert. That same space will also enable the troopers can dance and sing along. In a matter of hours, the soldiers set the stage, and the singers filed onto the hanger. Just like every other Star Destroyer, the stage is decked with standing spotlights and a curtain to act as a background. It also shields the rest of the group whenever they’re not performing.

You watched your fellow singers perform on stage, peeking from the corner of the curtain where the rest of the artists prepared themselves. As the crowd cheered and danced in place, your eyes scanned around the group. But at your current angle, you can’t see past the first few rows of troopers. So the only way to spot your boys is when you perform on stage. And it was happening real soon. 

Three more singers performed, some of them accompanied by background singers or dancers. Then, it was your turn. 

“Now, please welcome (Y/N)!” The manager introduced, and the crowd cheered as you walked on stage. Dressed in your performance outfit, you approached the microphone stand. Your eyes quickly scanned around the group, searching until a voice rang out from the sea of white and blue. 

“That’s my songbird!!!” 

Your eyes snapped to the source, and you softly gasped. There he was—your favorite ARC trooper.

Fives was waving his hands at you, a broad grin on his face. Standing by his sides were Echo, Hardcase, Jesse, and Kix. They were waving at you too, whistling and clapping their hands. They were all here. They are all safe and sound. You felt a weight come off your shoulders, blinking your eyes to fight back the tears. 

Gripping the microphone, you paused for a second before opening your mouth. Your voice projected throughout the hangar as you sang out your first couple of lyrics. “Oh, sometimes I get a good feeling, yeah/I get a feeling that I never, never, never had before no, no/And I just wanna tell you right now that I-/I believe, I really do believe that/Something’s got a hold on me.”

“(Oh, it must be love),” your backup singers sang softly after you. Drums began to play. A soft bass followed along as you continued to sing. Your feet carried you around the stage, feeling the beat. The large crowd of troopers resumed their dancing, stomping their feet and cheering as you reached the middle of your song. Standing at the center of the stage and facing forward, your eyes then locked to Fives’s as you sang out the next couple of lyrics. 

“My heart feels heavy, my feet feel light/I shake all over, but I feel alright/I never felt like this before/Something’s got a hold on me that won’t let go/I never thought it could happen to me/Got me happy when I’m in misery/I never thought it could be this way/Love’s sure gonna put a hurting on me.” 

The whole time, neither one of you broke eye contact. You can see the look of surprise appearing on the ARC trooper’s face before shifting to one of love, a smile decorating his face. The other boys looked surprised at your words before looking at Fives. It was evident that their brother had a thing for you since day one, but to have you tell him of your feelings ---incredibly so bold like this--- was shocking. But they began to cheer, Echo smacking Jesse’s back as his brother rolled his eyes before depositing a small number of credits. 

You grinned at the end of your song. Then, having witnessed the reaction from the boys, you blushed a bit. Glancing back at the band, you nodded your head. Drums began to play, followed by a couple of trumpets. “I met him out for dinner on a Friday night/He really got me working up an appetite,” you began to sing, moving your hips to the beat. The crowd started up again, dancing along to the sound of your voice. “He’s a one stop shop, makes my cherry pop/He’s a sweet talkin’, sugar coated candyman!”

“Well, by now, I’m getting all bothered and hot/When he kissed my mouth, it really hit the spot/He had lips like sugarcane/Good things come for boys who wait!” So you sang, smiling at Fives, who smirked back at you. The crowd was getting excited as you moved your hips rather proactively, your confidence rising after seeing Fives’s responses to your words. 

“He’s a one stop shop with a real big (ugh)/He’s a sweet-talkin’, sugar-coated candyman.” The crowd wolf-whistled at those words, but your focus was on Fives. You can see him biting his bottom lip, eyes heatedly watching you now. 

When the song finished, the band continued onto your final piece. You had perfectly planned this night. Your choice of songs were different than the ones from previous performances. This was your love letter to Fives. You love him, and it appears that he feels the same way. You don’t know when will be the next time that the two of you will see each other. You would have loved to tell him your feelings differently, but like how you said before, singing is what you know best.

“Ain’t no other man can stand up next to you/Ain’t no other man on the planet does what you do/You’re the kinda guy a girl finds in a blue moon/You got soul, you got class, you got style with your bad ass/Ain’t no other man, it’s true/Ain’t no other man but you!”

Your performance ended with a loud round of applause. You were softly panting, sweat trickling down your neck, eyes watching Fives. He was clapping the hardest, using two fingers to whistle. A bright smile came to your face, thanking everyone before retreating to the back of the stage. 

“What are you waiting for?!” Jesse shouted, a smirk on his face before lightly shoving Fives. “Go after her!” Echo encouraged, followed by a thumbs up from Hardcase and a nod from Kix. 

Without wasting another second, Fives rush past his brothers, being careful not to bump into anyone as the next singer came to the stage. It didn’t take him long to reach the side of the stage, but two non-clone guards stopped him. “Sorry, sir, but no one is allowed back here.”

“It’s okay! He’s a friend,” you quickly intervene. The guards relaxed, allowing you to approach the ARC trooper. All that confidence from being on stage was dripping away. Now, your heart was racing, and your cheeks felt like they were on fire. Fives smirked as your cheeks darken in color, your blush reaching down your neck to the tips of your ears. 

“Don’t tell me you’re embarrassed now, cyar’ika.” Fives chuckled as he took his hand in his. 

You laughed nervously, letting Fives pull you away from the group of singers and towards a more secluded area of the hangar. “M-maybe a little,” you admitted before rounding a corner. Both of you were now hiding the two of you behind a starfighter, Fives gently pressing you against a stack of heavy crates. A hand laid on your hip while the other laid on the containers, trapping you in place. “I told you never sang in front of a large crowd.”

“Could have fooled me,” he responded as his hand on the crates moved to cup the side of your face. You slowly relaxed under his touch before gently leaning into his palm, looking up at him with hooded eyes. 

“I meant every word, Fives.” You said in a hushed tone, your cheeks still flushed. You raised your hands up, before wrapping your arms around his neck, gently pulling him down to you, until the tip of your noses brushed. “I love you.”

“Say it again,” Fives moaned, his arms wrapping around your waist, pulling you flushed against his armor. 

“I love you, Fives.” 

What little space was between you two was gone, as Fives leaned forward, capturing your lips. It wasn’t a light kiss nor a deep one, but still full of passion. It was something that the two of you wanted. A moan escaped you as Fives pressed his tongue into your mouth, your hands moved to cup his cheeks, his hand cradling the back of your neck. “Ner cyar'ika laar senaar,” he purred against your lips after parting to breathe, before pecking your lips a couple of times. Hearing speak in Mando’a caused you to shiver in excitement, which he felt against his hands. 

“You liked that?” He growled before nipping your neck, causing you to gasp. “There’s more where that came from.” You then felt his hips press and grind against yours, releasing another moan from you. 

“There a few more singers left. Plenty of time for it,” you smirked before taking his hand. “And I know the perfect place where you can show me everything.” You both raced back to the ship that you arrived in. You both definitely had enough time, returning back to the hangar but the way you were walking, it was obvious what had occurred. 

You didn’t care how the boys teased you, or how the other singers looked shock, or flustered. You are in complete bliss, having Fives at your side and holding his hand for the rest of the evening. 

---------

A/N: Thanks again for reading! I have another fan fic in mind, but I should really focus on my finals first!

Ner cyar'ika laar senaar = My darling song bird

[mydearburkhart]

The Amy-verse

(or "if I was in that '70s show" part 4) | previously on The Amy-verse

Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from That '70s Show, which is created by Bonnie and Terry Turner and Mark Brazill. I own nothing, except for my original character, Amy Hamilton.

Warning: I'm not fluent in English and this is one of the ways I found to learn on my own. So if you find any mistakes, please let me know :)

1×02

*basement*

Hyde: Does it bother anybody else that these women live in Hooterville?

Eric: Technically, Petticoat Junction is down the track from Hooterville.

Hyde: Okay, does it bother anybody else that these women live down the track from Hooterville?

Donna: It bothers me that they bathe in the town water tank.

Kelso: With the dog.

Jackie: It isn't the drinking water, it is the water for the train.

Donna: It's still three naked women with a dog.

Fez: I want to be the Hooterville dog.

Jackie: Ames, you're awfully quiet. Are you okay?

Amy: Yeah, I was just trying to understand the context of this... scene, then I gave up and spaced out.

Kitty: Coming down... now, don't mind me. I'm just putting some clothes in. Eric, honey, I thought you could wear this on your birthday. It's nice, you look so handsome in it.

Eric: Why would I want to dress nice on my birthday?

Kelso: It's your birthday?

Amy: You don't know when his birthday is?

Kitty: Oh, you never know what's going to happen on your birthday!

Eric: Mom... mom, do not throw a party for me.

Kitty: Oh well, listen to Mr. Popularity. Like I have time to plan you a party. [laughs] Oh, uh... by the way, your sister Laurie is coming home from college for the weekend. No special reason, she just is. [goes upstairs]

Donna: Well, you're getting a party and best of all... it's a surprise!

Amy, to Eric: Your mom sucks at keeping secrets, but she's lovely. You should stop being an ungrateful idiot and appreciate the effort she's putting into this party.

[...]

*driveway*

Amy: So...

Donna: What?

Jackie: What are you gonna get Eric for his birthday?

Donna: I don't know, nothing seems right. I wanna give him something... special.

Amy and Jackie looked at each other, then gasped together: He kissed you!

Donna: Shh!

Amy: Donna, get in the car!

Jackie: Yes, get in the car so we can talk!

[...]

*in the car, Amy is on the back seat with her head between Jackie and Donna*

Jackie: Okay, what happened?

Amy: Tell us everything!

Donna: I'm not gonna talk to you two about this.

Amy and Jackie, at the same time: And who are you gonna talk to?

Amy and Jackie, to each other: Nice!

Donna, watching the boys play in the driveway: Okay! We get home from the Rundgren concert, and I'm sitting in the hood of the car, and I kissed him...

Jackie: French or American?

Amy: Even though everyone knows Brazilians are the best kissers...

Donna: I can't believe I'm talking to you two about this... [looks out of the window and sees them playing again] Okay! So, I lived next door to Eric my entire life and we talk about everything together, we love the same music, we love the Packers and then I kissed him and everything changed. And now I don't know if he's my boyfriend or if he's my best friend. If he's my boyfriend I lose my best friend, If I screw it up I lose my best friend and my boyfriend. Now, I have to give him his gift...

Jackie: Donna, Donna! I solved it. Get him... a scented candle.

Amy: Oh yeah, good idea.

Donna: A scented candle?

Jackie: It's practical and romantic.

Amy and Jackie: Oh, yeah.

[...]

*kitchen*

Amy: Hey, Mrs. Forman.

Kitty: Hello... young lady with an accent.

Amy: It's Amy.

Kitty, laughing: Amy... is there anything I could help you with?

Amy: Actually, I want to offer you my help.

Kitty: You want to help me?

*Amy nods*

Kitty: Oh, well. That's new.

Amy: I noticed that you're busy planning Eric's party and thought you could use some help.

Kitty, laughing: Oh honey, that's very kind of you. But wouldn't you rather spend time with the girls?

Amy: Uh... Jackie went to the mall with Donna to help her find a gift for Eric and I'm... kinda avoiding the mall.*

Kitty, understanding what she meant by that: In that case, I'd appreciate your help. Now, what do you know about American birthday parties?

Amy: Nothing really, but I know a lot about Brazilian birthday parties. See, there's a very popular candy on birthdays called brigadeiro. I can teach you the recipe.**

Kitty: Well, doesn't that sound fancy?

[...]

Kitty: Oh, Amy... this is delicious! [laughs]

Amy: I know!

Kitty: Thank you for helping me today, honey.

Amy: You're welcome, Mrs. Forman.

[...]

*basement*

Eric: Look, I know what you're all doing here.

Kelso: What are you talking about, man? We're just hanging out, like always. Except we're dressed nice, but that doesn't mean anything.

*Amy comes into the basement, wearing a red dress and a black jacket*

Amy: Let's party! [sighs] Why aren't you guys excited? I even wore my favorite dress!

Eric: Because I didn't want a party.

Amy: Oh, stop being such a pain in the ass. It's your birthday! Come on, cheer up a little. [she pulls him into a tight hug and gives him a kiss on the cheek] Happy birthday, Eric!

Amy, looking around: Why are you all staring at me? I'm Latina, I'm a hugger!

Kitty, from the stairs: Hi kids, I need your help with something. Amy, Jackie, Donna, Michael, Steven... young man with an accent, would you give me a hand? Not you Eric!

*everyone but Eric goes upstairs to help her*

Kitty: Everybody's ready? I'll call him.

*back in the basement*

Kitty: Eric, honey! Honey, could you come up here for a second? [goes upstairs again] Shut up, he's coming!

Everybody: Surprise.

[...]

Eric: Cassettes? Great, thanks, Hyde.

Hyde: You're welcome.

Amy: Open mine now.

Eric, opening the present: More cassettes? Wow, thanks, Amy.

Amy: Yeah, I didn't really know what I should give you. I was gonna give you a book, but I couldn't find an English version.*** So I thought, I'll give him some cassettes with Brazilian songs.

Kitty: Ooh, let's put them in the 8-track and play them.

[...]

Eric: Hey... it's a hot shave dispenser.

Kitty: Oh, he won't need that for a long time... a long, long time.

Midge: Of course he will, he's almost like a man.

Kitty: *kinda laughing, kinda crying*

Donna: I got you something...

Amy and Jackie: No!

Jackie: Donna, help me find my purse...

Amy: And I need help to find... my jacket?

Fez: But you are wearing it.

Amy: That's not the point, I'll lose it so Donna can help me find it.

Jackie: Donna, now!

[...]

*kitchen*

Donna: Jackie, you didn't even bring a purse... [sighs and points at Amy] And you have your jacket on.

Amy: Like I said, that's not the point!

Jackie: Duh! You can't give him your present in front of his guy friends.

Donna: I am one of his guy friends.

Amy: But you want to be his girlfriend!

Jackie: Look, Donna. I have put a lot of thought into this gift, please do not wreck this for me.

Donna, sarcastically: I'm sorry, I was being selfish.

Jackie, hugging her: It's okay...

Amy: Jackie, she was being sarcastic.

Jackie, gasping: How rude.

Amy, rolling her eyes: You know what? Go ahead, Donna. Give him a romantic gift in front of his friends, who are a bunch of assholes by the way, and his parents. He'll be embarrassed, you'll be embarrassed and it's more entertaining for us!

Donna: How come you're always right?

Amy: It's a talent of mine, you'll get used to it.

[...]

*the Pinciotti's kitchen*

Bob: Three fours, I need them.

Midge: Bob is very good at Yahtzee.

Kitty, gasping: The liquor cabinet!

Red: It's locked.

Kitty: What if there's an emergency?

Red: They'll call.

Kitty: What if they run out of chips?

Red: They'll starve.

Bob, standing up: I'm gonna fix myself a drink. Red?

Red: No... Kitty needs one.

Kitty: Well, I am just so worried– [motorcycle noise] Oh my lord, Laurie's leaving.

Red: Oh honey, she's in college. She doesn't wanna hang around with them.

Kitty: Well, maybe I should make a call, just in case–

Red, reaching for the phone before her: Kitty... what could happen?

Kitty: What could happen? [pause] Well, plenty could happen. Oh, plenty!

[...]

*fantasy sequence, Forman's living room*

Donna: Now that the adults are gone, we can be as bad as we want!

Jackie: Who wants to give Eric a venereal disease?!

Kelso: Hey, look... coasters!

Hyde: Forget coasters!

Eric: Please fellas, my mom put out coasters for a reason...

Hyde: I think I'm gonna put my drink directly on the furniture, that way it will leave a ring!

Eric: NOOO! Why oh why didn't I begged my mother to stay?

Amy: Oh shut up gringo, have some of my country's exotic food while we listen to samba!

Fez: Quiet you silly Americans, I'm on a long-distance call on your parent's phone.

Eric: But that's immoral.

Fez: Ha, in my country of... wherever it is I am from, I can never tell... morals get in the of a good, dirty time. But first, I need to eat some chips... What? Out of chips? Now I am mad, I must shoot something! [pulls out the gun]

Eric: Not the littlest hobo!

[...]

*Forman's kitchen*

Jackie: Wait on the porch, and I'll get Eric.

Donna: It's dark out there.

Jackie: And you're giving him a candle, yeah?!

Amy, shaking her head: Poor Donna, so young and naive.

Jackie: Here, matches.

Donna: He might not want to light it.

Jackie: Don't say that...

Amy: Don't even think it!

Jackie: Now, when he opens it, he'll say cool... or something. And then, you give him a look... like this. [demonstrates]

Amy: Oh no, honey. Don't do that, it won't shine on you. [to Jackie] Jackie, it's Donna, the same girl who wanted to give Eric his gift in front of everybody.

Donna: I'm right here.

Jackie, shaking her head along with Amy: She's right though, don't do that.

[...]

*living room*

Fez: So, what did you get from Donna?

Eric: Nothing yet.

Kelso: Oh... maybe it's the big gift. You know the really big gift. You guys... know what I'm saying when I say the big gift, right?

Hyde: Yeah, we got it... and we got it.

Fez: I'm not even from here and I got it.

*Amy and Jackie come into the living room*

Jackie: Oh Eric... Donna's on the porch.

Amy: She's waiting for you.

Kelso: He's getting the big gift!

[...]

*Amy, Jackie, Fez, Hyde, and Kelso are spying on Eric and Donna*

Jackie: This is it, he's going for it.

Kelso: Uh-huh, it's his birthday, she should kiss him first.

Jackie: She did the last time.

Fez, Hyde, and Kelso: What?

Amy: Shut up, Jackie.

Jackie: Nothing... shut up and watch.

Hyde: Come on Forman, go for it.

Eric, from outside: The door is open, we can hear you... We can see you!

*everyone hides*

Fez: Is he kissing her?

Hyde: None of us can see them, Fez.

Fez: Eric, are you kissing her?

Amy: Since you can hear me... Donna, I told you not to give him the look, it doesn't shine on you.

*Donna closes the sliding door*

taglist

@kim1918, @supernannygirl704things, @snookstheallmighty

let me know if you want to be part of the list ;)

* I don't know if it's clear, but Amy's family is broke.

** Brigadeiro is a little ball made of chocolate, and it's just THAT good.

*** That's actually true, but the English version of the book I chose was only released in 1988.

[hinatas-sunshine]

Request: It's 5:32 in the morning from where I am, so sorry for asking this early. How Kenma, Ushijama, and Tsukishima react to their s/o that just unintentionally roasting them, other people, and things? - @animmle

tiny a/n: thank you for the request! No matter how early or late I always appreciate them! 🤍 ~ this isn’t my best work but I couldn’t think of much :(

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None

Requests: Open!

✰ MASTERLIST ✰

☾ Tsukishima Kei ☾

• You knew walking into a relationship with him, let alone friendship, you had to have a thick skin

• What he didn’t know is how thick HIS skin had to be too

“I don’t know tsukishima maybe if you tried a little harder things would run smoother.”

• He knew you had no ill intentions though, especially by the way you kissed his nose and smiled at him

“Don’t kiss me it’s emba-“

“Finish that sentence. Do it. Finish that sentence.”

• Honestly you had to be the only person who tsukishima was intimidated by

“I’m not scared of you y/n.”

“I don’t expect you to be.”

“....Yeah why would I ever be scared of a small person. How silly of-“

“I’m not scared of you either, how could I be scared of a tall guy who doesn’t care about anything but music and school. Sounds nerdy to me.”

• You laughed lightly while he glared at you

“I’m only kidding!”

• Yeah he didn’t talk to you for a few hours after that-

• Your problems weren’t only with him though...no....

“Oh so the king is going ba-“

“Why are you roasting on kageyama? The boy can’t even talk to other people you think he cares what you think?”

• Tsukishima was cackling at this while Kageyama turned red in embarrassment

“Y-y/n you really just helped him and then k-killed him!”

“Huh?”

• Looking at Kageyama you automatically started apologizing

“I’m so sorry Kageyama! You’re amazing at volleyball, so it’s okay that maybe you prefer the game over the people! It’s not weird or anything!”

• As your boyfriend and Hinata’s cackling intensifies along with Kageyama’s red cheeks Daichi sighed pulling you away from the situation

• He doesn’t do anything to stop you from roasting other people and things he really just lets you continue

“I don’t know I don’t like this girl.”

“Why?”

“One time she told me she hated dogs. And if you hate dogs how are you even a tad bit trustworthy?”

“I’m right here?”

“Okay and I’ll say it again?”

• Now you were full on bickering with her 🙈

“You got yourself into that.”

“It’s not my fault she got all defensive.”

• when he confronted you about it-

“Y/n you have a big mouth.”

“I think it’s pretty normal sized if you ask me-“

• he laughed lightly watching you touch your pink lips and look confused

“No I mean, you offend people. And you don’t know when to stop.”

• You furrowed your eyebrows on confusion even more.

“Could you explain a little more?”

• Tsukishima sighed and sat with you on the floor next to your bed where you were studying, placing his face in the crook of your neck placing small innocent kisses on it

“I’ll explain another time.”

“Okay lazy bum.”

“See!”

“No I knew what I was saying.”

✰ Kenma Kozume ✰

• You’re terrible at keeping your comments to yourself and he knew this

• The thing is, he loved it.

• Was it ever too quiet for his liking there you were

“OH BROTHER, THIS PLACE STINKS.”

• Many people Kuroo thought it would’ve bothered him but the moment you say something it’s like he can’t help but smile

• It’s not that you were outgoing automatically, but you knew out of you and Kenma you had to be the talker and you knew this since you were younger

“Your hair is so long! I thought you were a girl..”

• Kenma hated you when you first met because of this

“But honestly you’d be prettier than half the girls here!”

• Yeah you were only making it worse

• But once he got over it, he saw you just had a big mouth and said whatever came to your mind

“I don’t know Kuroo, you sound very sus to me. I used to not trust you when we were younger.”

“What why?”

“You give off bad boy vibes, I guess In the end you were just a big nerd. What a plot twist in my opinion.”

• Kenma cackling while Kuroo tries to claim he is a bad boy

“It’s not a bad thing!”

“It’s not a good thing!”

• Kenma sees how honest you are and thinks everyone should have someone like you in their life

“Everyone needs a y/n in their life.”

“Really? That’s a first.”

• You laid your head on his lap while he smiled looking down at you, hair covering his face

“You have such a pretty face my love, you cat looking eyes top everything off.”

“I don’t have cat looking eyes?”

“Eh you do.”

• When he tried to confront you about how much you babble with no filter-

“Oh I know.”

“You know?”

“Yeah, but if I didn’t say what I was actually thinking- that’s just as bad as lying. No?”

• Kenma stared at you for a second

“Babe, your brain. It’s amazing.”

“I like to think it’s pink and cute but okay.”

• Kuroo, Yaku and Yamamoto don’t get you but the moment you met Lev-

“So you’re like the opposite of Hinata?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re tall, can’t seem to want to learn to play the sport, and you come off as intimidating.”

“SHE THINKS IM INTIMIDATING.”

“No...no more like you come off as stupid.”

“Kenma :(“

• Yeah Lev is the only one who doesn’t get offended by you because he focuses on the wrong things

“You’re so lanky and tall.”

“Am I really that tall?”

“Yeah.”

• Kenma hates your interactions with Lev because he thinks they’re not funny

“Don’t talk to her Lev.”

“Why?! Me and y/n are best friends!”

“No you’re not.”

“We aren’t but we can be aquatinted!”

“That sounds so much cooler suck it Kenma.”

• Yeah You were the reason everyone found out how dumb Lev was

✰ Ushijima Wakatoshi ✰

• He likes to think you’re as unfiltered as him

• But he also thinks you’re too unfiltered and it’s not that you unintentionally roast people you kind of expose them

• He also definitely saves you when you’re about to say something

“I don’t know your skirt seems kinda unflat-“

• Like then, he cupped a hand over your mouth and dragged you away without a word

• And that’s how you knew if you were saying something offensive, your boyfriend would cup his hand over your mouth and drag you away.

“I don’t know Tendou, you have creepy eye-“

*smack*

• You pouted before looking at your boyfriend

“I wasn’t finished! But I think it’s bad ass! I’d be intimidated if I didn’t know you were a crackhead!”

• Tendou was definitely your best friend and he eggs you on to say stuff you shouldn’t

“What do you think about Ushijima’s spikes today hmmmm?”

“I couldn’t focus I was too busy looking at those beefy ar-“

“THE SPIKES Y/N THE SPIKES!”

“OH yeah I mean not as strong as usu-“

“How can I fix them?”

• Every now and then you knew when to speak up and when to not, when it comes to volleyball you don’t because you’re not a pro?

• You managed to catch yourself sometimes but then you turn into an even worse babbling mess

“Semi you remind me so much of Sugawara from Karasuno, that guy. Such a good setter- NOT THAT YOU ARENT A GREAT PLAYER TOO! You’re an amazing player!-“

“Y/n I get it.”

• Ushijima gets entertained when you babble, he’s never seen anyone think as fast as you do in situations like this.

• He doesn’t ever think to confront you, mainly because he thinks it’s a cute quirk of yours and finds it somewhat entertaining

“Goshiki reminds me so much of Rock Lee. I can’t be the only one who sees it?”

• Tendou had a field day with this statement and Goshiki just didn’t know who Rock Lee was

“GOSHIKI IN A WHINEY VOICE SAY GAI SENSEI!”

• Ushijima just watches-

“No I asked Ushijima out and he turned so red I swear-“

“That’s enough talking.”

• He cupped his hand over your mouth and dragged you out while you waved bye 🧚🏻‍♀️✨

• You often almost exposed your boyfriend

“He sleeps with a volleyball night ligh-“

“He always asks me to pick out the pickles in his-“

“He hates when I hug a pillow instead of h-“

“He seems superior here but when it’s us it-“

• This is when Tendou and Semi rise and snatch you from him

“What were you saying y/n?”

“Yeah finish what you were saying about Wakatoshi~”

“Oh yeah!”

“No.”

• And there your boyfriend stood ready to take you away when-

“Ushijima has a bunch of you guys’ pictures framed! It’s really sweet!”

“Oh really?”

“Wakatoshi that’s so sweet!”

• You smiled at your boyfriend who looked at you and sighed

“You’re a hassle.”

“What how?”

“Y/n is an angel Wakatoshi!”

“Thank you Tendou.”

“I never said she wasn’t an angel, just a hassle.”

Tags:

[nahimjustfeelingit-writes]

Imagine

Erik and Reader are best friends and Reader is the best freaky love for Erik but he doesn’t know how freaky she is. He finds out when he sees her at a heels class dancing to Beyoncé- Rocket.

“Deep down, everyone doubts themselves. Sometimes, I think I’m not good enough but at the end of the day I know I’m the fucking shit. I pray you quit overthinking, replaying failed scenarios, feeding self doubt & seeing the good in everyone but yourself you deserve more, ma.”

He passes Y/N the blunt, licking his full lips with a quick swipe of his tongue, and showing off his gold canines. Taking a puff of weed, Y/N watches Erik scratch the side of his defined torso over a tattoo that says Fuck Reality in that cursive lettering she loved to see. He yawns, blinking his sleepy eyes a few times before looking over at Y/N. She couldn’t help but look at his face.

“Make yourself a priority, Y/N. For real. Stop settling for these toxic lame ass niggas. When you meet a real nigga you gon’ realize you was never asking for too much.”

Y/N passed the blunt back to Erik while staring out of his bedroom window from his king sized bed. She knew her worth, she really did, but she always ended up going back to the same fuck boys.

“You’re too fine to be giving all your time and energy into him. Too fine. My bestfriend needs to know her worth. You looking at me like that but I’m being honest, shit, when was the last time you felt appreciated? When was the last time a nigga did something for you and didn’t expect something in return? Called to check up on you? Texted you back? Ate your pussy because he knows you had a rough week and you just need your pussy ate? Some good sex? When?”

Her carefree bestfriend with his tapered dreads and full beard and mustache. His sincere whiskey colored eyes and messy brows that he always talked with. Raising them, creasing them. He smooths a hand down his solid and sculpted chest before resting that hand over his abs. The gold rings on his fingers against his brown skin was just as beautiful as the sun setting before them.

“I can’t remember. I’m embarrassed to say,” Y/N finally speaks. She heaved a sigh, unzipping her velour pink hoodie, a white form-fitting shirt underneath, “I know I deserve more. Ugh, now I’m going to be single and lonely for Valentine’s.”

Erik sat up on his elbows, the hue of the sunset against his russet skin, “I’m your valentine now. i’ll be there at 10pm climbing through your bedroom window with flowers. Dahlias right? Cool, I’ll see you later tonight?” Erik gave Y/N a teasing smile. She knew he was trying to make her feel better but it didn’t change the fact that it sounded so...honest? Like he wanted to do and say that.

“Scary movies and chill? That romantic movie shit is played out. We can snuggle close with some popcorn with Freddy Kruger on the screen.”

“Your obsession with 80s slasher movies is amazing,” Y/N laughs, “Why must you mix Valentine’s with blood and gore, Erik?”

“Why not? Instead of bleeding your heart out because you’re heart broken, you can watch a heart actually bleeding out,” Erik chuckles before he ashes out the blunt in his ceramic ashtray that Y/N made for him with 4/20 carved into it.

“Should I dress up?” Y/N played along.

“Just keep those same straight backs in your hair and wear those little stripe linen shorts that make your ass look nice. Oh, and that mini white T-shirt that says Daddy on it in pink letters. Can’t forget the mix match ankle socks either.”

“You can wear a durag with a pair of grey sweatpants and a black T-shirt. The ones you wear that’s all loose fitting on you because you refuse to wear a tighter one? Yeah, and a pair of Vans.”

“What time for our little date, ma?”

“8. And don’t be late either.”

“To a date with you? Never.”

“Okay, I have a question,” Y/N turns towards him, “what’s your idea of a perfect night with your girl?”

“Hmm,” Erik rolled his moistened lips in deep thought, “Dick rubs and intellectual conversations. Head in a comfortable bed. Falling asleep with my head laying on her crotch so I can just pull her panties to the side and eat her pussy. Honestly, give pleasure by just being there. We don’t even have to talk or fuck. Presence is just comforting.”

“That sounds amazing,” Y/N never had those things but that’s what her bestfriend likes? She wished she had that same treatment.

“Those chill, nice nights with someone you feel comfortable with.” Erik spoke in a low tone while twirling a single loc, “I crave that.”

“I know, ugh, me too, Erik,” Y/N laid back against the bed, “I have to go to class today.”

Erik gave her a questioning look, “What class?”

Y/N turned around to lay on her belly, “A heels class. Remember I was telling you that I started doing this like a month ago?”

“Shorty, I have other things going on with me right now I didn’t focus on that,” Erik gives her a sad look, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’ve been working on a routine. I think I have it down. It’s gonna be real sexy.”

“Sexy? Who you tryna impress with this class?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Y/N teased.

“Ah, man. That ain’t fair, ma. I’m your bestie.”

“You are but I don’t need to tell you my business,” Y/N rolls her eyes into her head.

“It’s cool, cuz I’m coming there with you.”

Y/N’s face flushed.

“What? I can’t come-“

“NO.”

She didn’t want Erik to watch her dance. Being surrounded by those women made her feel like she was in her room dancing in the mirror. They all connected because they related to each other. If Erik came there she would probably mess up her routine since he would definitely be watching her move. It was a heels choreography class and Erik is a man, he’s going to watch. Y/N wore either a pair of black high crotch panties with fishnets and a cropped t shirt or a form fitting leotard with black sheer stockings. Six inch heels on her feet with a skinny heel since she’s gotten better. Popping her ass and hitting splits to the music. Erik never saw her like that. What would he say and do when he did?

“It really ain’t that deep, ma,” Erik jokes because Y/N was spaced out, “I promise I won’t laugh at you. I don’t have shit else to do but sit around so let me come with you.”

Y/N pondered while staring down at her hands before heaving a sigh of defeat, “okay. You can come.”

“I knew you would say yes,” Erik gave her a half smirk, “You can’t tell me no even if you tried.”

“Don’t embarrass me in there, Erik,” Y/N spoke to him with a warning in her voice. She knew he could be silly and fuck with her but when she danced, it was her time to shine.

“Teh, girl, you really think I would do that?”

Erik got closer to Y/N, leaning on his elbows while his face got closer to hers, “I’ll be on the side lines cheering you on. I promise, okay?”

Y/N looked up into his eyes, giving Erik a weird look before turning away from him, “Okay.”

He was acting very...strange. Not like his usual self but Y/N could be overthinking it. She sat up on her knees, lifting off the bed to put her sneakers back on before picking up her velour jacket and her PINK gym bag that carried all of the things she needed for class.

“Put on a shirt and come on, Erik.” She picked up a shirt that was wrinkled and balled up on the floor before throwing it at him, “I’m not trying to be late!”

“Calm that shit the fuck down, Y/N. Don’t give me attitude before I really make you late for this class.”

—————————-

“You calm down yet?” Erik asks Y/N while following behind her to the dance studio that held her heels class. The closer they walked, the more Erik could hear the deep base to the sensual music that vibrates the walls. He’d sit back and watch a bunch of women shake their ass in heels. Erik looked at his bestfriend walking ahead of him as she lead the way with a sway of her hips. Those tantalizing hips. Erik looked up at the back of her head as if she had eyes back their and could see him checking her out. He couldn’t help himself. Like he said back in his room, she’s too fine.

“Are you going to behave?” She looked back at him over her shoulder with a brow raised, “Well? Are you?”

“Yes ma’am,” Erik said with a husky voice, “whatever you say.”

Y/N rolled her eyes before making a left turn, opening the double doors to a dimly lit studio with a pink neon sign of a woman in heels that read dance. A few chairs rested in the corner of the room, mirrors were placed on one side of the wall so that the ladies could watch themselves. A guy stood off to the side in deep conversation with a short plump girl about 5’ 3 dressed in a mesh leotard with red fishnets and heels. He was fumbling with a camcorder that Erik assumes is used to record the ladies do their routines. On the polished hardwood floor, directly in the middle, were all the ladies doing stretches. Some were down in a split stretching out their legs, others were bending over to touch their toes, stretching out their backs. Erik recognized the music. It sounded like Teyana Taylor & Kehlani- Morning.

“Okay, I gotta get myself changed, I’ll be back, alright?” Y/N spoke with a whisper to him.

“Yeah, I’ll be over here,” Erik pointed to a black chair with a leather cushion to sit on.

“Cool,” Y/N gave Erik a silly smile before walking away, waving to a few ladies as she made her way over to the dressing room. Erik rested his hands in the pockets of his black cargo pants that he wore. The wrinkled shirt wasn’t the shirt he had on. He was wearing a muscle tee with the sides cut really low, giving you a view of his muscles and scars along his ribs down to his hips. Black boots on his feet and gold around his neck and on his fingers. Erik scratches his scruffy facial hair while looking around the class. When he did this, eyes were on him, wondering who this handsome guy was that came with Y/N. He entertained their looks for a minute before taking his phone out of his pocket to scroll through pointless apps.

“Oooo, Y/N, what routine are we gonna start out with today, honey?” A tall mocha skinned girl with a large curly bush and a black catsuit on asked. Erik looked up at the mention of her name. His eyes seemed to widen and gawk at Y/N. Erik was in a state of stupor. Stupefied but mesmerized at the same time.

“I have something I’ve been working on all week but that can wait for tomorrow. I gotta have a guy to do the lap dance with. When is Montell coming back?”

“Girl, why use Montell when you can use him?” The tall chick pointed at Erik. Erik looks over at Y/N, watching her eyes grow wide.

“Erik? No,” Y/N laughs, “He’s just here to watch until I’m done.”

The chubby chick that was talking to the camera guy came over to intrude, “Isn’t that your boyfriend though?”

“No. He’s my bestfriend and he’s just going to watch.”

“Well, can I use him for my routine then? I put a little something something together to Ciara- Body Party and I need a nigga to pop this ass on. He so cute, Y/N. Hi bestfriend!” The pretty chubby girl waved at Erik who returned the wave with a smile on his full lips.

“He is cute. How can you just be friends with that?”

“Dominique,” Y/N was referring to the taller chick, “Erica,” She looked over at the short plump girl, “I’m using him for my routine.” Y/N spoke with finality. Wasn’t no chick in that class gonna put ass on him if it wasn’t her.

“Oh? Why the change of heart?” Dominique folded her arms while giving Y/N a sassy smile. Y/N didn’t say a word as she walked away, looking over at Erik before sticking her tongue out at him. He was in a fit of laughter, clutching his chest and everything.

Y/N was dressed in a black thong with sheer black stockings that had tiny rhinestones on it, a tiny black and gold wrap top that made her breast sit high and black stilettos on her feet. All that ass out and bouncing each time she walked. Erik knew his bestfriend has body but damn, he never saw her like this. Y/N was fumbling with a wall audio system that was installed to play throughout the studio. She found the song she wanted, pausing it, then grabbing a chair to bring in the center of the dance floor. The other ladies crowded around and the camera guy set up so that it was facing her. Y/N then walked over to Erik, a roll of her eyes while trying to fight a smile. She got down in front of him in a squat, talking closely with him. Erik leaned forward on his elbows to hear her.

“Okay, so I didn’t mean to put you on the spot like that but,” She sighed, “I’m gonna need you for my routine.”

“Hmm,” Erik smirked, “What I gotta do?”

Y/N licked her lips, “All you gotta do is sit in that chair for me. You’ll be in that chair while I do all the work, alright?”

“Let me ask you something,” Erik narrowed his eyes, “Why did you change your mind so quick?”

Y/N rolled her eyes away from him before kissing her teeth, “You gonna do that for me, or what?”

“You ain’t off the hook, ma,” Erik stood up, while looking down at Y/N who was still in a squat position while staring up the valley of his body to connect with his eyes, “You gon’ tell me after this class.”

“Whatever,” Y/N finally got up, grabbing Erik’s hand with force, walking him to the middle of the dance floor. He wasn’t nervous one bit. He wanted to see what his bestie could do.

“Sit.” She instructed, earning oooo’s and ahhhh’s from the ladies around them. Erik raises his brows at her before taking his seat real slow, legs wide and one arm stretched over the back of the chair. He motioned with his head for Y/N to get started, his eyes intense and heated. Y/N motioned for one of the girls she started the class with to play her song.

Beyoncé- Rocket began to play.

Let me sit this ass

On you

Y/N sat down real slow on Erik while looking back at him. She wound her hips, back arching and ass moving up the length of his crotch nice and gently. She did a spin on his lap, her leg going up and over his head so she could straddle him. Her hands grabbed at his shoulders before pulling on his shirt to bring him closer to her. She made him watch her while her hips moved over him. Erik has to hold onto the sides of the chair.

Show you how I feel

Let me take this off

Will you watch me

Yes, mass appeal

Don't take your eyes

Don't take your eyes off it

Watch it, babe

If you like

You can touch me baby

Do you

Do you wanna touch me baby, ooh

Grab a hold, don't let go

Let me know

That you

Ready (ready)

Erik looked at her with eyes so deeply filled with desire there was no denying his attraction to his bestfriend. Y/N held those eyes with her low ones, before grabbing his jaw to tease him. She almost touched his lips with hers but she pulled away before Erik could even get a taste.

I just wanna show you now

Slow it down

Go around

You rock hard

Y/N stood up, getting down on her knees in front of Erik while running a hand from his chest down to his crotch that was indeed rock hard.

I rock steady

She bounced up and down in a squat to demonstrate how steady she would rock on that hard dick. A few chicks wolf whistled at that, cheering her on.

And rock right up to the side of my mountain

Climb until you reach my peak baby, peak babe, peak

And reach right into the bottom of my fountain

Y/N pats her kitty kat to indicate where that fountain he needed to find was.

I wanna play in your deep baby, your deep baby, deep

Then dip me under where you can feel my river flowing and flow

Y/N went back on the floor, her legs coming all the way up to rest on each side of her head. She was open like the peace sign. Her hands ran up her body, eyes still on Erik to show him that she was nothing to play with. He gave her a sly smirk that showed off a single dimple. So this how she got down? She danced all freaky like this? Showing him where she wanted him to go with his hardness?

Hold me 'til I scream for air to breathe

She grabs her neck, body arching from the floor. Erik could feel his dick growing stiffer.

And wash me over until my well runs dry

Send all your sins all over me, babe, me baby, me

Rock it…

Y/N got up from the floor, swaying her hips. She stared into the camera, moving in those heels like she was wearing a pair of sneakers. Erik didn’t know she was this flexible. When she arched her back to pop her ass, getting into a split stance while running her hand on her crotch he wanted to lift from that chair, pick her up, and hold the back of her neck while making her pop her ass on his hard crotch. He had to have restraint because this is her routine but FUCKKK, was it hard.

Rock it 'til waterfalls

Rock it 'til waterfalls

Rock it 'til waterfalls

Bathe in these waterfalls

She grinned her hips into the floor before bringing her legs up from behind, her heels almost touching the back of her head before rolling over to lift a single leg in the air, grinding her hips forward. She was showing him what that body could do. She was showing him exactly how freaky his bestfriend could be.

I do it like it's my profession

I gotta make a confession

I'm proud of all this bass

When you put it in your face

She stood, arching forward, and grabbing her ankles while looking back at Erik. Her ass popped and swayed from side to side.

By the way, if you need a personal trainer or a therapist

I can be a piece of sunshine, inner peace, entertainer

Anything else that you may read between the lines

You and I create rockets and waterfalls

“YES HUNTY!” One of them yelled out while snapping their fingers.

“THATS IT Y/N!”

Erik nods his head in approval. He found himself rocking to the beat while tapping a single foot and grinding his hips in the chair. She rode that song with so much ease. Beyoncé’s voice mixed with her sensual moves had everyone in that room watching in complete silence now. The song played on and then that’s when it became really intense...

I can't help but love the way we make love

Daddy, daddy

Ooh child, ooh now

Yes, Lord, damn baby

She was going crazy. Popping her ass, arching her back, looking at Erik with her mouth hanging open. Swinging her head from side to side, running her hands over her breasts before jiggling them. That continuous Daddy, Daddy, has Erik losing his mind. The self control was unraveling.

You driving me cray, cray, yeah

You ain't right for doing it to me like that daddy

Y/N crawled towards him. She was staring at him like she wanted to rip his clothes off and show some attention to the hard dick that she felt growing in his pants. When she made it over to him, she got into a handstand, her legs widening into a split, before descending back on him, her legs wrapping around his waist while Erik pulled her forward with his hands on her hips.

Even though

I've been a bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad girl

Y/N bends her body back while grinding on him so hard and forceful that Erik couldn’t help but to grind up into her on that chair. His hips were lifting from the chair.

Tell me what you're gonna do about that

He wanted to do something right fucking now. Y/N was driving him crazy. His growls and moans were trapped in his throat because of everyone surrounding him.

Punish me please

Punish me please

Daddy what you're going to do with all of this

Ass

Y/N turns around, her ass rubbing along his chest. Erik moves his hands down her back before slapping her ass, causing Y/N to gasp and everyone around them to cheer and clap.

All up in your face, yeah

Hell yeah

Love me so deep

Ooh my shit's so good it ain't even right

This shit wasn’t fair. She bounced on his lap in a continuous rhythm to the freaky beat. Since she wanted to give him a little lap dance to this beat she was definitely going to fuck him to this song. Bestie or not.

I know I'm right

Hell yeah you the shit

That's why you're my equivalent

So sexy

To Erik’s disappointment, Y/N got up from his lap, circling him in the chair before standing behind him. She lowered her arms over his shoulders from behind, taking her fingers to drag his muscle tee up to reveal his chiseled body. Abs flexed, skin so smooth even with the raised scars, her nails clawing lightly at his ripped abs all the way up to his chest. Her lips lightly touched the side of neck, giving him a lick there while the song faded out. The room erupted with applause at her routine. Y/N wrapped her arms around Erik’s neck, rocking him back and forth with a big smile on her face. Erik grabs her arms, holding them with a grin on his lips. Y/N did her thing.

“Girllllllllllll,” Dominique shouted while coming over to hug Y/N, “You had your bestfriend ready to hop off this chair and handle you, girl.”

“Oh? Really?” Y/N spoke into Erik’s ear before giving him a quick peck on the cheek, “I’m sorry I put this ass on you and you couldn’t do anything about it.”

Erik clenched his jaw. She only fueled him more.

“Nothing to say? Hmm?” She dragged on.

Erik looked up at her with a tilt of his head. She knew those hard domineering eyes meant one thing and one thing only: she was going to get it for sure. He had something for her after this class.

[go-dark-turtle]

(There's a link to part 1 if you havent read it already.

Here we go part 2 is complete it was a real struggle as I kept getting distracted.🤣😂 Anyhoo heres part 2 it does contain mild swearing and a tiny bit of violence.

I didnt expect it to be this long. 0-0

Please enjoy and please let me know what you think.)

Free the Future

Kakyoin x fem reader fan fiction

Chapter 2: Beach House Blues

Kakyion's eyes had widened, it had been a while since he heard that name he sat up and slightly gasped, that damn cowboy caused so much trouble for the group, he nearly put Avdol out of commision and stole their car after dealing with Enya.

You then became breathless, your hands just barely gripping the steering wheel all those memories came flooding back to you, every last one of them, your vision went hazy and the tears formed in your eyes. You closed your eyes and shook your head to get rid of them, you lost grip of the steering wheel and you held your face in your hands.

"Y/N!" Kakyoin tried to get your attention, but it was no use.

Just then an oncoming truck was coming your way and because you lost your grip of the wheel your car was heading straight for it. Kakyoin had to act now and fast. 

"Hierophant Green!" He called out his stand and he appeared beside him.

Then Hierophant Green started to unravel his lower body becoming a bunch of strong ropes, he nodded to his master knowing exactly what's at stake. The ropes quickly slithered down Kakyoin's legs and upwards towards the bottom of the wheel, gripping it tightly and at that moment and with such force Hierophant tugged with all his might. The car swiftly brushed the truck leaving a few scuffs on both indicator lights of the vehicles. Kakyion sighed in relief knowing that the vehicles did not collide and called back his stand. 

You snapped back to reality and gasped with such a force you realised what happened, you grip the wheel once again and you slammed on the brakes. Shaking, you place your hands to your mouth and begin to let out a few tears. Kakyoin felt awful that his question led to you being so distraught. He turned to you and closed his eyes and brought you closer to his chest, pulling you in for a hug. His arm rested on your back as you buried your face into his chest, his other arm gently rubbed your head to calm you down. You held onto his jacket and softly cried into him. 

"Shh it's okay Y/N. I'm so sorry I pressed you to talk when you weren't ready." Kakyoin softly spoke. 

You couldn't even form a sentence but you nodded into his chest, then you took a deep breath and broke away from the hug, You looked forward and placed your hands on the wheel. He looked at you with his lavender orbs, feeling guilty, but mostly angry at that damn cowboy. He thought to himself how could such a horrible person cause you so much pain, he could see in the little time you've been with him that you were a kind and thoughtful person. 

Thankfully the men in the back were still asleep and you started to drive again, Joseph took a wrong turn down a one way street and by the time you started to move again he caught up with you. Thank goodness you didn't have to explain to the others what had happened. 

"We are almost there" You softly spoke "Just under this bridge we will be by the beach front." You gave a soft smile at Kakyion you felt calm again.

He smiled at you back and he glanced and saw the beautiful  sight, a long open beach with crystal clear water shimmering in the sun's reflection. You indicated to the left after the bridge you stopped at the T- Junction and looked into the mirror and pointed left to tell Joseph to turn left now. You drove along the side of the road by the beach, with the sand brushing against your tires. There it was just in sight of the beach house, The Bombay Cottage. 

You sighed with relief as you pulled up to the side of the beach house and parked your car, you waited for Joseph to park his car just in front of the steps of the beach house. You turn your attention to Kakyion and you place a hand on his shoulder and pat him a few times. 

"Thank you for helping me back there, I don't know what would've happened if I didn't snap back to reality" You smile more. 

He held your hand and smiled back softly "I'm just glad you are safe, but most importantly thank you for getting us here smoothly and safely" 

You smile softly while looking at his warm smile but then you remember about the gents in the back. You then leaned passed him and tapped Avdol's knee to wake him up.

"Mr Avdol? Mr Avdol, we are here, wake up." You tapped him more to wake him up.

Avdol rubbed his eyes and gave a big yawn and stretched his arms and realised they had made it to the beach house. "Oh my goodness how long was I out for?" 

Kakyion put up 2 fingers and smirked "2 hours." 

Avdol blinked slowly "Hm that's a first for me, I'm normally awake on our car journeys, Y/N got to say your driving with so smooth you made this fortune teller drift off." He ended with his signature hearty laugh again.

Just then Joseph marched up to the back door of your car and swung it opened and pulled the still sleeping Polnareff out the seat.

"I saw that cheek you pulled earlier, how dare you!" Joseph gritted his teeth and he didn't forget about the Coca Cola bottles, Polnareff had a rude awakening and realised what he had done. 

You all looked with a sheepish expression as you all exited the car and Polnareff clasped his hands and begged the older man forgiveness while in his grip. "No Mr Joestar, I'm sorry please dont hurt me, it was a joke I swear, come on we are friends, NOOOOOOOO!"

Polnareff wriggled and escaped his grip and ran around the back of the beach house and along the beach and Joseph chased him down. "Get back here!" 

Jotaro joined you all on the porch and you quickly looked away from him and fumbled in your pocket for the keys, you unlocked the door and you smiled at the gents behind you.

"Welcome to the Bombay Cottage, this is one of many houses that my good friend of the family,  Tamsin owns. To be honest this is my favourite from all the ones he owns." You sigh happily and you carried on "Here we have the porch there's a small bench so if you need a breather or a smoke then please use it as your hearts content." You open the door and hold it open for the men. "This is the main lobby" You point to the staircase "Upstairs are the bedrooms I'll show them shortly, oh through here," You carry on walking through the long hallway and reached three doors at the end of the path, "In here to the right is the living room, there's books, TV, radio and a gorgeous  view of the beach to keep you entertained..." You open the door to show them the room and you see from the giant window Joseph and Polnareff rolling around in the sand trying to tickle each other. 

"No stop, you know I'm ticklish!" Joseph tried to grab Polnareff 

"Not as much as I am, NOO! Don't you dare!" Polnareff squealed as he gripped onto Joseph's arm. 

Everyone else looking in the room had a deadpan expression and watched them trying to stand up but slipped on wet sand and fell face first. 

Jotaro stood in front of you and moved you out the room with his chest and slammed the door behind him "Moving on, what's this room here?" He pointed to the door in the middle.

"Jotaro no need to be rude, sorry about him." Kakyoin gave his friend a disapproving shrug  leaned in closer to you and whispered "He doesn't like silly antics, it pisses him off." 

"Oh I see now" You look at Jotaro as he places his hands in his pocket and rolls his eyes at the loud screaming from the men outside. The wave came back to shore and soaked them completely. 

"This is the downstairs bathroom." You open the door and show them a small bathroom, the toilet behind the door,  the sink and shower on the far side of the small room. You close the door and then open the door to the left and show them an open planned kitchen with a dining table. 

Avdol and Kakyion's eyes lit up in awe they had never seen such a fancy kitchen before you smile at their expressions and you lead them all back to the stairs in the main lobby, just then Joseph and Polnareff walked up the steps of the porch and opened the door and nearly stepped in the house completely drenched and covered in wet sand. 

Avdol pointed at them and ushered them to the dune buggy "Don't you dare step foot in this lovely home. Come on." He led them to the buggy and got the suitcases out from both of the cars and rummaged about Joseph's and Polnareff's luggage and threw them a fresh set of clothes. 

"You can get changed in the buggy, don't you dare bring a spec of sand into this home. Y/N has gone out her way for us, it's the least you can do." Avdol folded his arms and gave both his friends a serious look before smiling at them and giving a soft wave before joining you all upstairs. On his way back to the house he picked up the remaining suitcases and hauled them up the stairs. 

You had finished showing Jotaro and Kakyion the guest bedrooms and the only rooms remaining at the end of the hallway,  your bedroom and the main bathroom. 

You pointed at your room but didn't open it "This is my bedroom not a lot to see to be honest. and right here is the main bathroom." 

You opened the main bathroom door and the men were greeted to a gold and blue bathroom with a giant bath in the middle with the toilet and sink by the window. Avdol peeked in while you showed the others the bathroom. 

"Say Y/N you don't mind if I had a quick bath do you?" Avdol asked so politely 

"Of course you can. Oh!" You reached for the cupboard in the corner of the bathroom and pulled out a few towels for him and placed them on the towel rack by the bath, the others left the room and as you took your leave Avdol stopped you. 

He placed his hands on your shoulders and looked at your face. You look at him with a questionable expression.

"Is everything okay Y/N?" He asked quietly

"Yes of course" You softly smile

"Then why are your eyes red and puffy" He questioned you and  your eyes widened, you were caught lying.

Just as you were about the answer Polnareff came waltzing  in and took notice of the nice bathroom

"O la la~ Ah tres bien, tres bi-'' His eyes focused on you in Avdol's soft grasp and his eyes widen "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~" 

"Polnareff it's not what you think!" He got flustered and he let go of your shoulders. 

You quickly scrambled out the room, also feeling flustered,  you rushed out in such a hurry you bumped into Kakyion's back. 

"Oww" You rub your nose. 

"Y/N what happened!" Kakyion turned around and Jotaro started to walk down the stairs

"Avdol figured out I was crying from earlier and-" You explained to Kakyion. 

"GET OUT OF HERE! I'M TAKING A NICE RELAXING BATH!" Avdol went into a rage at Polnareff's constant teasing and threw a sponge at his hair. 

*************************

Half an hour later and everyone was at the dining table about to enjoy some spaghetti al nero di seppia, Joseph was insistent on making dinner and no matter how many times you stopped him, he said no, you couldn't stop him either, so you gave in and enjoyed having dinner made for you. At the dinner table you sat in the middle with Joseph to your right and Kakyoin to your left sat across you was Jotaro on the left Polnareff in the middle.

Avdol walked in just as Joseph was plating dinner, everyone including yourself was in shock to see the Egyptain man with his long hair tied back in a messy low ponytail. He took his seat next to Polnareff and he grinned

"Hey Avdol you should have your hair in that style more often it might impress the ladies" The Frenchman raised his eyebrows at him while giving you a wink. Kakyion facepalmed while watching the exchange, while you sipped on some Coca cola, Jotaro rolled his eyes and looked away.

Avdol slowly turned to him and pointed at him "I told you it was a misunderstanding!" 

Polnareff flinched and raised his hands to him "Okay okay I'm sorry I was only teasing... geez!" 

Joseph sat down and you all began to eat and you all loved the amazing taste, the tall haired man enjoyed it so much he wolfed it down and sat back with a grin on his face. You all finished eating about 10 minutes or later and that's when clasped your hands and cleared your throat, it was time. 

Kakyoin placed his hand on your back and nodded to you " It's okay, tell them what you told me."

You had a heavy sigh and you looked down to your hands.

"I don't even know where to even start with this so I guess I'll start with... with.. Hol Horse...." You calmly spoke even though your body started shaking.

"What?!" Joseph's eyes widened

"HOL HORSE! THAT BASTARD!" Polnareff gritted his teeth 

Avdol and Jotaro didn't say much yet they both looked at you with concern and leaned in to find out more. 

"Well it all started when....." You began to tell them how it all started 

*Flash back brought to you by Za Warudo enterprises* 

2 months ago you had travelled to Cyprus with Tamsin and wanted to explore not only the best sights in Cyprus but also visit Egypt.

You took a ferry over and when you arrived you saw how beautiful and how built up the capital city of Cairo looked and that's when you bumped into the long haired man. 

"Oh sorry miss I didn't mean to bump into ya like that, names Hol Horse its a pleasure" he helped you up.

"Oh it's okay no trouble at all my name is Y/N" You shyly respond

"Ah what a lovely name for such a beauty, say I just feel awful about knocking you over like that, wanna come with me and get some coffee?" he asked with such confidence. 

You nod a lot and couldn't get away with how handsome he was. 

You had coffee with him and just before saying his goodbyes he offered to meet up again the same time the following day. This went on for several days and before you knew it you and him hit it off very well. You couldn't believe such a handsome guy took in such an interest  in you. He told you all about his life and why he was here in Egypt and you too did the same explaining about visiting your old family friend Tamsin in Cyprus. 

Then came that fateful day. 

"Hey darling, I want you to meet my boss Lord Dio. I think he'll really like you, if you want to join our little gang he will give you riches and anything you desire." He wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you close to his body. He stared into your eyes and placed a small peck on your cheek. 

"You've told me so much of Dio it would be so wonderful to meet him. Oh you did say he gave you a special ability didn't he?" You asked with your eyes beaming with joy. 

"That's right babe you can't see it but he gave me this sweet ability to use a powerful gun where I can control the bullets" He smirked and held you closer to him

"Wow that's so cool darling being blessed by Dio with such an amazing ability" You clasped your hands in his and walked to the entrance of the beautiful white building hidden in the older districts of Cairo. 

You walked alongside him walking down a long and narrow hallway and then walked up a long spiral staircase it was dark and poorly lit only seeing so much in front of you. As you walked further into the mansion you saw other members of the gang glare at you, grin and even woof whistle at you. Hol Horse glared at the ones who whistled at you and clenched his fist. They scurried off at the sight of his fist. 

 You both walked into the library and that's where the man your beloved Hol Horse spoke of  sat just before you, you couldn't see much of him apart he had long blonde hair and huge muscles. 

"Lord Dio I brought her to meet you. I hope she becomes useful in our plan." Hol Horse kneeled before him and he stepped down off his seat and walked towards you 

He placed his cold large hand on your face and slowly caressed it. You froze on the spot at his touch, he licked his lips and clicked his fingers. 

"Hmm, she IS a beautiful woman Hol Horse." His voice was so deep and chilling it sent shivers down your spine. You look over to your boyfriend and he didn't once stop kneeling for his master. 

Dio brought you closer to his body and his red eyes scanned every part of you taking in all your features. 

"Enya bring it now, she's perfect!" Dio with a deep husked growled  at the old lady by the doorway. 

Your eyes widened on her return. She held an arrow and presented it to Dio, he licked the arrow and he smirked " Your expression is beautiful, but now you belong to me DIO!" 

He gripped your arm as you tried to squirm away and with one tug you fell back into his well toned body he drove the arrow into your heart. Everything went hazy, your vision went blank and your body slumped to the floor. Hol Horse rushed over to you and held you in his arms. 

"Lord Dio do you think she will be accepted?" He asked with his voice shaky with what he witnessed. 

He shrugged and returned to his seat and watched over you. 

*************************** 

Just as you got half way through your story, night had fallen the moon shining brightly over the beach house. Just then at that moment Polnareff accidently let out a small burp which ruined the mood everyone glared at his disgusting act and Jotaro slammed his hands down on the table. The whole time you'd been sobbing reliving the memory of when you first met Hol Horse. 

"Im going for a smoke..." he gritted his teeth.

Everyone watched him leave the room and then turned their attention to the Frenchman who covered his mouth but then also stood up. 

" I uh better go check up on him....." He walked out the room in shame. 

Joseph walked behind you and wrapped his arms around your shoulders, he looked down at you with a caring but sadden eyes, you brought your left hand to your mouth, your breathing got heavy like earlier, tears ran down your face. Kakyion gripped your right hand to let you know he was here. Avdol gritted his teeth and shook his head in disbelief, his warm eyes looking over at you. He felt awful that you experienced that traumatic event with Dio, he knew too well how frightening he truly is.

Just then you all heard Polnarerff scream in pain you jolted up and you brushed past everyone and ran towards the porch. 

"Y/N wait come back!" Joseph called for you but you carried on.

"Y/N stop!" Kakyion called to you and then chased after you 

Avdol walked by Joseph and looked both confused and worried with how you acted. 

You reached outside and you saw Jotaro having a cigarette and Polnareff holding his finger in pain. 

"Oww Jotaro what you go and burn my finger like that huh?" He glared at his friend.

Jotaro glared at him and huffed "Dont be so fucking rude next time!" 

*Cue the start of Roundabout theme* 

You brushed past Jotaro and you placed your hands on Polnareff, then all of a sudden your hands became encased with a marble shield and you began to heal his wounds from the burn. 

Jotaros eyes widened "What the hell! She's a stand user?!"

Polnareff smiled that the pain went away, you smiled back at him, but at that moment you lost your vision and collapsed down the stairs. The men stood there in shock. It all happened all too fast for them to react. 

Kakyion caught up to you and his eyes widened seeing you collapsed on the steps he ran down, kneeled in front of you and picked you up in his arms. 

He glared back to Polnareff and gritted his teeth. He walked up the steps of the porch, he gave him the most disapproving glare and walked in the house and held you closer to him as he made his way up to your bedroom.

 [<--------To Be Continued----------]

Chapter 3 part 1