#a 'good-fellow' indeed if you get my drift

[feliciamontagues]

x

[adascore]

Out Of The Blue | J. Fleming

pairings: jessie fleming x chelsea!reader

warnings: angst. swearing. crying. jessie’s transfer.

author’s note: inspired by @pixiesfz (fic: moving on) and @jflemings (fic: inevitable), I definitely recommend checking out their versions of the transfer!

masterlist

•••••••

January, 2024

''Yeah, that does sound great. I'll, uh, think about it and call you tomorrow… Okay, thanks… Bye bye.'' Jessie hung up the phone, her mind swirling with conflicting emotions. She sighed as she glanced back into the living room, her girlfriend sitting on their couch, blissfully unaware of anything.

Y/N wasn't entirely oblivious to Jessie's agent researching new clubs. It had been an ongoing discussion for a while now, fueled by Jessie's frustration with her dwindling game time at Chelsea.

Jessie quietly sat back down on the couch, not wanting to disturb her partner's tv-show.

''Everything okay?'' The Canadian turned her head, finding Y/N's eyes on her.

She nodded, biting her lips. ''Yeah, good… just my agent.'' She replied, trying to mask the turmoil in her voice.

''Any news?'' Y/N asked.

Bless her heart, Jessie thought. Despite not being the biggest fan of no longer getting to be teammates, Y/N had been very supportive of her girlfriend's search, believing her talent was indeed being wasted at Chelsea.

''Uh, nothing new,'' the midfielder lied, ''she's still in talks with a few clubs.''

''Oh, okay.'' The forward smiled, redirecting her focus back to the series she was watching.

Jessie didn't want to lie, she really didn't. However, telling the love of your life that you received a great offer from an American club and that you're really considering it, isn't an easy thing to do. The Canadian tried telling herself she should only tell Y/N when it's official, but Jessie knew from the moment her agent informed her of the option, that this was the right direction for her to go.

Her game time would improve compared to Chelsea's, and Janine and Christine would become her club teammates- she'd be stupid not to accept. But Portland was far from London, and Portland was far away from Y/N, her true home.

She promised herself she would tell her when the time was right, when the offer from the Thorns was official and her future was certain.

''I think she might stay until the end of the season, and then see what her options are.'' Y/N responded to Erin, after the Scot asked about Jessie's future.

Erin nodded. ''Nice, we can give her a proper sendoff then.''

''I'd say a party, but I don't think she would want to be the center of attention.'' Millie chimed in, thinking about how they could celebrate the younger woman's time at Chelsea.

''She'd look more like a tomato than she already does.'' Erin laughed, imagining her fellow midfielder's reaction.

''But it's good that we'll have at least this last season with her. The last match is gonna be emotional, Emma leaving, Jessie leaving…'' Millie said once the laughter had died down.

Y/N nodded her head. ''Yeah, but I just want to see her happy, you know? She loves the team, but, you know, with the game time and everything.''

Both women nodded, understanding Jessie's reasons for wanting to play somewhere else.

''Do you know where she's maybe going?'' Millie asked, curiously.

The younger woman shrugged her shoulders. ''She has plenty of options,'' Y/N grinned proudly, ''I think she's staying in Europe, though- Champions League and all.''

''She's gonna become a rival.'' Erin teased, rubbing her hands together in feigned mischief.

Y/N couldn't help but smile at the thought, but the underlying sadness of Jessie's departure lingered in the back of her mind.

''I also see her staying close by, at least near you.'' Millie lightly nudged her teammate's shoulder, sending a wink.

Y/N grinned back, but there was a hint of dejection in her eyes as she glanced at her friends "She's gotta do what's best for her," she said softly, her gaze drifting to the floor, "that's the most important thing.” She murmured.

As Y/N's thoughts lingered on Jessie's impending departure, she was abruptly pulled back to the present by the sound of someone's voice.

''Hey, you're ready to go?'' Jessie asked, her arrival at their table breaking the somber silence that had settled over them.

Amazing timing, Fleming, Y/N thought as her girlfriend approached their table.

Y/N's heart skipped a beat at the sight of Jessie, her dejected mood momentarily forgotten as she met her girlfriend's gaze. "Yeah." She replied, her eyes lighting up and a smile gracing her lips.

Her friends exchanged knowing glances, their amusement evident as they observed the subtle shift in Y/N's demeanor in the presence of her girlfriend.

Y/N got up from her chair. ''See you tomorrow, beautiful ladies.'' She bid her friends goodbye.

''Tomorrow, love birds.'' ''See ya!''

Jessie silently grabbed her partner's bag from the floor, and the pair walked together to the parking lot.

''They're so adorable it makes me sick.'' Erin muttered.

Millie laughed at her teammate. ''I think you might be allergic.''

As they drove out of the Chelsea training complex, a heavy silence enveloped the couple, weighing down the air in the car. Silences weren't necessarily unusual for them, but there was something about this one that had Y/N feeling confused and worried at the same time.

Glancing sideways at Jessie, Y/N noticed the furrow in her brow, the tension etched into the lines of her face. It was clear that something was bothering her, something she was struggling to articulate.

"Hey, Jess," the striker began hesitantly, breaking the uneasy silence that hung between them, "is everything okay?”

Jessie's grip tightened on the steering wheel, her gaze fixed on the road ahead as she wrestled with her thoughts. ''Yeah, just a bit tired.'' She responded, her voice strained.

Her answer did nothing to soothe her. There was a distance in the Canadian's eyes, a hesitancy in her voice that spoke volumes. "You can talk to me, you know." Y/N said, and she reached out to Jessie's hand.

For a moment, Jessie tensed up at the display of affection. Her breath was caught in her throat as she struggled with what to tell her partner. ''Can we talk about this when we're home? I don't want to have this conversation while I'm driving.'' She asked, momentarily making eye contact with her.

Y/N nodded, though the unease still gnawed at her. "Of course," she replied gently, withdrawing her hand but keeping her gaze fixed on Jessie, "we can talk about it when we get home."

The remainder of the drive passed in an uncomfortable conversation about their thoughts on the training that day.

As they finally pulled into their driveway, Y/N's heart pounded in her chest, the anticipation of the impending conversation sending a wave of anxiety crashing over her. She followed Jessie inside, the heavy silence hanging between them like a dense fog.

Once inside, Y/N took a seat on the couch. Her eyes fixed on the midfielder like a hawk as Jessie paced through the room.

Taking a a few deep breaths to ease herself, Jessie finally broke the silence that had enveloped them. "I... I received an offer." She confessed, her voice barely above a whisper.

Y/N perked up at the revelation. ''An offer?'' She repeated. ''That's great, no?'' Her voice tinged with uncertainty.

But as she watched her girlfriend unconsciously shake her head, she knew there was more to the story than Jessie was letting on.

The Canadian hesitated, her gaze shifting to the floor as she struggled to find the right words. "From the Portland Thorns," she finally admitted, her voice barely audible, "they want me to play for them.”

Y/N's heart sank at the news, a knot forming in the pit of her stomach. ''Portland?'' She muttered. ''In the U.S.?''

Jessie silently nodded. ''Yeah, the NWSL.'' She confirmed.

Her heart sank even further at the confirmation, the reality of the situation settling in like a heavy weight on her chest. ''Wow… that's, uh, that's amazing- with Janine and Christine, that's really nice, babe.'' She tried to muster a smile, but it felt hollow on her lips.

Despite her attempt to be supportive, the weight of Jessie's decision bore down on Y/N like a heavy burden. The thought of being separated by thousands of miles was something out of a nightmare.

But as she looked at Jessie, her heart ached at the thought of holding her back from pursuing her dreams. She knew that she had to be strong, to support her partner no matter what path she chose.

''Thank you.'' Jessie was unsure of how to proceed, it was clear that her girlfriend wasn't expecting a transfer to the other side of the world. "I... I know this isn't easy," she continued, her voice wavering slightly. "But I have to do what's best for my career.”

Y/N reached out, gently squeezing Jessie's hand. "I know," she replied softly, ''and this is gonna be really good for you.''

''So… you're not upset?''

She shook her head, a forced smile tugging at the corners of her lips. ''Of course not. I know you're going to do amazing there, and I'm happy that they are seeing your talent. It's a great club, Jess. And if it means you'll be happier... then I'm all for it.”

Tears pricked at the corners of Jessie's eyes as she pulled Y/N into a tight embrace. "I love you." She whispered, her voice choked with emotion.

"I love you too," Y/N replied, returning the embrace, ''I think you forgot for a moment that I'm, like, your biggest fan.'' She chuckled, tears forming in her own eyes.

Jessie laughed now as well. "How could I forget?" She echoed, her eyes sparkling with affection as she looked at Y/N. "You're the best.”

As the evening wore on, the weight of Jessie's decision lingered in the air, casting a somber mood over the apartment. Despite the reassurances they had exchanged, the reality of the situation still hung heavy on their hearts.

A few days later, the time came for Jessie to face her teammates and share the news of her new club. The staff had gathered the team into the meeting room with the excuse they needed to go over some past matches.

''Before we get into some of the matches, there is someone here who has some news for us,'' Emma began, ''Jessie?'' The coach signaled for the Canadian to take her spot at the front of the room.

The midfielder quietly walked towards Emma. ''Hey, everyone,” she awkwardly greeted the room, "I, uh... I have something I need to tell you.” A hush fell over the room as all eyes turned to Jessie.

Y/N's eyes became fixed on the floor, not feeling ready to hear this for a second time.

''I've received an offer from the Portland Thorns,” she said, still a bit on edge, ''and… I've decided to accept it. So this is actually my, uh, last day as a Blue.''

"I... I know this might come as a surprise," Jessie continued, her voice faltering. "you guys are an amazing group, and I'm so lucky to have shared the pitch with such incredible players. All of you will always have a special place in my heart, and, yeah, just thank you for everything.'' She finished her small speech, becoming emotional.

She received applause from the squad and staff in the room. Emma was the first to give her a hug. A flicker of irritation flashed through Y/N at the thought of their coach's role in Jessie's decision to leave, but she pushed it aside, knowing that now was not the time.

All the players got up from their seats to say their own ‘thank you's' or give their own hugs to Jessie. However, the young striker remained seated, finding herself unable to follow her teammates.

With a heavy heart, Y/N quietly rose from her seat, her footsteps barely audible as she made her way towards the door.

She felt a hand on her shoulder as she almost went for the door handle. ''You okay?''

Y/N was met with Sam as she turned around, the Australian's face expressing concern over her teammate's exit without having said anything to her girlfriend.

''Yeah, just need the bathroom.'' She replied, quickly.

Sam nodded and let her go, but she was not convinced. The No. 20 shared a look with her captain who had also watched the young woman's escape.

Millie swiftly ruffled the Canadian's hair, before walking over to Sam. ''What was that?''

''I don't know, said she needed the bathroom, but she went before the meeting.'' The experienced striker explained, a furrow in her eyebrows.

''I'll talk to her.'' Turning back to Sam, she offered a reassuring smile before making her way towards the door.

She caught up with Y/N in the hallway, and gently placed a hand on her shoulder, causing her to startle slightly. "Hey," the Brit said delicately, her voice filled with warmth and understanding. "Mind if we chat for a moment?”

Y/N hesitated, her gaze fixed on the floor as she struggled to meet her older teammate's eyes. "Sure." she replied quietly.

She led the younger one to a more secluded area, not wanting anyone to eavesdrop on their more personal moment. Millie's face was full of concern as she turned to her. ''Are you okay? What happened there? Didn't Jessie tell you already?''

''She did, she did… a few days ago.'' She answered, her voice still quiet and full of emotion.

''Then, what's wrong? Why'd you leave?''

Y/N pulled her attention from the ground to Millie's eyes. ''It's just… that, like, it seemed to have only hit me now that she's actually going, you know? She's gonna go to Portland, while I'm staying here in fucking London.''

Millie's expression softened with understanding as she listened to Y/N's words, her heart aching for her younger teammate. ''I get it,'' she put her arm around her, ''it's tough knowing that she'll be so far away, especially when you're used to having her here with you every day.''

The striker nodded, a tear slipping down her cheek as she struggled to contain her emotions. "Yeah," she murmured, ''I'm…'' she trailed off.

''You're what, sweetheart?''

''I'm scared.'' Her voice was small, if her teammate wasn't standing so close to her, she probably would have missed it.

''Of what?'' The captain frowned.

''The distance, I don't think I can handle it, Millie.''

Millie's heart ached at the vulnerability in Y/N's voice, her own eyes brimming with tears as she wrapped her younger friend in a warm embrace. "I understand," she murmured, offering her a comforting squeeze, "it's okay to be scared. It's a big change. For the both of you.''

Y/N nodded, her tears flowing freely now as she struggled to articulate the depth of her fears. "I... I'm scared of losing her," she admitted softly, ''that she'll forget me while she's there.''

"You won't lose her," she reassured her, her voice filled with sincerity. "Jessie loves you, Y/N. And distance won't change that.”

Y/N sniffled, a small hiccup escaping her as she leaned into Millie's embrace, finding solace in her comforting words. "But what if... what if she meets someone else?" She whispered, her voice tinged with fear.

Millie's grip tightened, her heart breaking at the thought of her friend's pain. "Jessie loves you," she repeated firmly. "And nothing, and I really mean that, nothing will bloody change that.''

''Thanks, Mills.'' Y/N said, her head resting on her shoulder.

''You're welcome, darling. I'm always here for you. And Erin, and Sam, and Guro, Niamh, Z, all of us.'' She reassured her, wanting her to know that they'll stand by her while she goes through this difficult time.

Y/N let out a shaky breath, feeling a sense of relief wash over her at Millie's words. "Thank you," she whispered, her voice filled with gratitude. "I... I really needed to hear that.”

''Anytime, bubs,'' the defender pecked the top of her head, ''I do think you need to tell Jessie this. It's important for her to know how you feel about all this.''

The younger one nodded, taking a moment to compose herself before pulling away from Millie. "You're right," she agreed, her voice a bit steadier now, ''I'll talk to her about it.''

Millie gave her a reassuring smile, her eyes filled with encouragement. ''Great, she'll understand. It's Jessie, remember?'' She chuckled, trying to get a grin out of her friend.

She was successful as Y/N managed to crack a smile. ''Yeah, it's Jessie,'' she straightened her posture as if ready for battle, ''thanks again, Mills. I really appreciate it.''

The defender nodded, the smile on her own face widening. ''You're very welcome, sweetheart.'' She gave Y/N a small pat on the back.

The next evening, they sat together in their dimly lit living room, trying to watch a movie. Y/N glanced over at Jessie, whose eyes were focused on the television.

"Jessie," she began, her voice barely above a whisper, ''can I, uh, talk to you about something?''

The Canadian's brows furrowed in concern as she turned towards her partner. ''Of course.''

Y/N took a deep breath. ''First, I am so happy for you that you're going somewhere where they are appreciating your talent, and that you'll be closer to your family and your siblings...'' she began, her words slow and measured. She paused, struggling to meet Jessie's gaze. ''I just don't think that I, uh, am gonna be able to handle the distance.''

Jessie's stomach twisted with unease as she absorbed her words. In the days since it had become official that she would be moving to Portland, they hadn't really discussed how their relationship would proceed. Each of them had spoken about it with their friends, but they both seemed hesitant to broach the topic with each other, perhaps afraid of the uncertainty it might bring.

''I want to, Jessie, I really want to try- I just want you to know how I feel, it's been bothering me.''

The midfielder found it hard to respond as she observed her girlfriend who looked like she was about to burst out in tears. Tears welled up in Jessie's eyes as she reached out to gently cup Y/N's face in her hands, forcing her to meet her gaze. "I understand," she whispered, her voice strained, "and I appreciate you being honest with me.”

Y/N's own eyes started to water. She leaned into Jessie's touch, her heart breaking at the thought of losing her. ''I love you, J Flem.''

''I love you.'' Jessie reciprocated as she took her partner into her arms, wanting her as close as possible.

''I don't know if I can handle being so far apart, not seeing you or speaking to you every day. International break is already a killer for me, and it's difficult to just go back-and-forth between Portland and London.'' The striker whispered into Jessie's neck, not able to say it any louder.

The Canadian nodded, completely understanding her perspective. ''I know,'' she whispered back, 'I never wanted to put you in this position."

For a moment, they simply held each other in silence, the weight of their unspoken fears hanging heavy in the air. But as the minutes ticked by, the reality of their situation became increasingly clear.

''I don't want to hold you back.'' Y/N said, her voice muffled against the fabric of Jessie's shirt.

''You're not holding me back at all.'' Jessie immediately retorted, ruffling her hair.

Y/N weakly chuckled. ''It feels like I am.''

''Please don't think that, babe.''

They were both aware of what was coming, they were simply wasting time as if that would somehow work and they wouldn't have to leave each other.

''I remember when I first joined Chelsea, and I was watching some of you guys' matches, and thinking you were so intimidating,'' Jessie broke the silence.

''but then you were actually one of the first people to say hi to me, and you just looked so different than on the pitch. You were smiling, and trying your best to make me feel welcome.'' She laughed, an affectionate smile playing on her lips.

Y/N grinned as well, while wiping some loose tears away. ''I just remember thinking you looking super awkward.'' She dryly responded.

Jessie gave her a light push. ''Hey!''

''I also thought you were very cute… with your flushed cheeks.'' She quickly added.

The midfielder ironically blushed at the admission.

It became quiet between the two of them again, reminiscing their early days as teammates at Chelsea.

''We'll find our way back to one another, I'm sure of it.'' Jessie nodded.

Y/n felt a lump in her throat at Jessie's words. ''We're still so young, you never know what can happen.''

''And I know what's going to happen. You and I, together- whenever, wherever that may be.'' She reassured her, her voice filled with sincerity.

Y/N nodded, her chest tightening with the weight of their impending separation. "I love you, Jessie." She told her, the pair locking eyes.

"I love you too," Jessie replied, her voice catching in her throat, "more than anything."

jessie fleming requests are always welcome!

[malt-rants-and-stuff]

Having some Tashiro (and prev pres) Thoughts

mostly just re-hashing things my fellow tashiro fans have said but I just felt like making my own post about it. be warned i wrote this while on a 4 hour drive on paper so im not sure how the length translates into a post, this will be a long one haha. also beware of inconsistent caps lock usage.

OBLIGATORY WARNING FOR SASAMIYA FIRST AND SECOND YEAR NOVEL SPOILERS

This whole thing was mainly brought on by two things, one is my non-ssmyverse friend dming me a twt screenshot with the most bland and uninspired description of tashiro's character ive ever read, signaling to me that tumblr has really spoiled me with the good tashiro takes. the other thing was that i got inspired to bring the first and second years novels with me on my previously mentioned long drive, which means that i got the pleasure of rereading both and, most importantly, rereading Tashiro Love & Passion. safe to say i had a lot to think about afterwards.

The whole thing really reminded me of the aspect of tashiro that i've always found interesting: his observant nature. And i dont just mean how he views others, but also how he views himself. How this perspective breaks the most of what we'd expect from a character like him, something Harusono loves to do with their characters.

From the first couple of pages in L&P alone, we get a lot of insight on how tashiro sees himself and how he bases much of that on how others view him.

He mentions a lot of clubs that he was a part of in the past or helped out with, describing his tendency not to stick around one club.

"The all-rounder." A "pinch player" anyone could call on.

I feel like this is an important place to start because just from this we see a bit of how Tashiro breaks from the mold of what an unassuming reader may expect him to be.

In the Sasamiya manga/anime, we dont really have too many chances to really view tashiro for who he is as an individual. with our limited perspective of him, we get to know miyano's friend tashiro, a bright, fun, and earnest character who says whats on his mind and is apparently on the ping pong team with hanzawa which is neat.

and if you werent a bit unhinged like myself and some others, this would be a fair assessment of his character. but ohhh boy once Love & Passion hit the towers there was no turning back.

there have been some posts getting into the themes of this chapter that i feel analyze it better than i ever could, so i wont do that, but i do want to talk about how tashiro's character is portrayed throughout the chapter.

And by far the main part that i want to focus on is how hardworking he is, and his and other's perspectives of him are effected by this.

Because tashiro is someone who wants very very badly to win, as he says numerous times throughout the chapter. Even under the guise of someday getting to quit the ping pong club, he pushes himself to get better; even going as far as practicing against the grannies and grandpas at the bath house that totally didnt adopt him.

For all his complaints, it would be easy to push off his actions as comedic. maybe, and im just making stuff up as i go, saying that he is only behaving as a stereotypical fun-loving slacker would. that his only motive truly is just to leave the club and drift through the rest of his high school days.

But then, that just isnt true is it? what kind of slacker would put so much time and effort into a club that he never even wanted to stick with in the first place?

This my dear friends, is how the Tashiro brainworms Fucking Get You.

Because why indeed, why is tashiro, who drifts through life wondering if he'll ever find his purpose, his Passion if you would, so impressive to the Previous Ping Pong Club President (prev pres) that he finds himself in line for future president?

While tashiro never really seems to figure this mystery out himself, we can take a few guesses.

While we will probably never see prev pres' thought process here (unless we get those 10k words of hanzawa lore that he'd probably be a part of) his actions speak for themselves in a way.

Afterall, this is the same president that got him stuck in this club to begin with, the same one who watched him complain, the same one who'd help drag him back whenever he would try to skip.

He's also the same president who watched him keep to their deal instead of just trying to find a way around it and quitting anyways. the same one who played against him at every practice, watching him learn and grow as a player. who saw him work hard, determined to not bring the team down, even if he wasnt as into it as the others. who saw him stick around.

in his perspective, tashiro takes multiple chances to not how he feels different from the people around him, that he has never known their "love" and never felt their "passion".

He finds himself surrounded by the Passion of others each day. His teammates, his friends, his bath house grandparents, just about everyone in the whole world. but what about him?

i mean, its not as if he's not interested in anything, he has things he likes. hobbies he enjoys. he just... never got that burning Passion, that unabashed Love for something like everyone else seems to have.

I think prev pres understood this part of him. that he saw what tashiro, for all his insightfulness, couldnt see for himself.

because for all tashiro believes that he doesnt have Passion, he sure does love to watch others indulge in theirs.

he takes note of what little he can catch while kuresawa and miyano talk BL, just so he can ask questions later. he gets to know the people at the bath house, listening as they talk about their lives and interests. and while he may not be "super into" in the ping pong club in general, he still wants to see his teammates succeed. he may never have stuck with a club for very long, but he still made himself reliable enough that he's seen as someone they can call to step in when needed.

in my mind i think that is what prev pres saw in him, how tashiro's dedication to see the Passions of others flourish assured him that the club would be safe in his hands.

and, while i cant say tashiro's passion is one specific thing right now, i can say that it encompasses every dream he wants to see grow. every love he curiously watches bloom. every ping pong match he fights to win.

[pastoralnhappy]

Jonah and his Belly…and his Whale

Introduction

“I am a chubby Catholic seminarian,” I muttered to myself as I adjusted the ill-fitting cassock, the fabric clinging awkwardly to my frame. The echoes of the morning prayers still lingered in the chapel, a reminder of the spiritual journey I had embarked upon. My heart was heavy with the weight of self-doubt, yet buoyed by a faith that had guided me through many trials.

When I first arrived at the seminary, I wasn’t quite as chubby. The rigorous schedule and the strict discipline had initially kept my 18 year old body in shape. But over time, the communal meals and the warm, encouraging words of certain priests had allowed me to indulge in the pleasures of food. Father Thomas, our jovial and rotund head of the seminary, always said that a good meal was a gift from God, and I was inclined to believe him.

“Jonah, you must enjoy the blessings God provides,” he would say with a hearty laugh, his own round belly shaking. “A happy heart and a full stomach go hand in hand.”

As I made my way to the refectory for breakfast, the aroma of freshly baked bread and sizzling bacon filled the air. My stomach growled in anticipation, a reminder of my earthly desires that often conflicted with my spiritual aspirations. Sitting down at the long wooden table, I joined my fellow seminarians in silent prayer, thanking the Lord for the sustenance we were about to receive.

The clatter of cutlery and the hum of conversation soon filled the room. I caught snippets of discussions about the visiting bishop’s potential stance on various issues, the excitement tempered by a hint of apprehension. Today was a special day, after all, and there was a palpable buzz of excitement among the seminarians.

It was then that I noticed Brother Michael, seated across from me, staring intently at his plate. He was new to the seminary, a quiet, thoughtful young man with a scholarly air. His thin frame and serious demeanor were a stark contrast to my own. He looked up, meeting my gaze with a shy smile.

“Good morning, Brother,” I said, trying to sound cheerful.

“Good morning, Brother Jonah,” he replied softly. “Are you looking forward to the bishop’s visit?”

“Indeed, I am. It’s not every day we get to hear from such a distinguished guest,” I replied, my voice filled with a mixture of anticipation and nerves.

Our conversation drifted to the day’s schedule, the bishop’s likely topics of discussion, and the latest news from the Vatican. Despite my outward composure, I couldn’t shake the feeling that today would bring something significant, something that might alter the course of my journey in the seminary.

As the morning sun cast its golden rays through the stained glass windows, illuminating the faces around me, I felt a surge of hope. My size, my indulgences, my journey—they were all part of a greater plan, one that I was slowly beginning to understand. And as I bowed my head in silent prayer once more, I whispered to myself, “I am a chubby Catholic seminarian, but I am also so much more.”

[moriartyluver]

ARE YOU MINE CHAPTER III

"FIFTY QUID FOR A CUP OF COFFEE?!”

"Keep your fucking voice down, Sherly!" (Name) whisper-yelled at the noirette "We didn't come here to drink the stupid overpriced coffee anyways." 

It was a Monday afternoon, about 4 ish now, and (Name), as well as her fellow band mates, had the bright idea to go to an expensive coffee shop in central London. 

So here they were, in an exclusive coffee shop full of white men in suits or stressed out secretaries, and the occasional rich women hanging out. 

"Kopi Luwak.." James muttered "What even is that..? It's so damn expensive..."

"Bet you could still afford it with those sugar daddies of yours," Sherlock remarked before (Name) kicked his leg under the table to shut him up 

Obviously they weren't here without reason. (Namen had seen a TikTok talking about all the places to find a rich boyfriend, which she wasn't really interested in, but she decided that because coffee shops usually were full of businessmen around this time of day, it would be a perfect place to find themselves a rich manager. 

John took out his phone, Googling the expensive coffee, before showing James and Sherlock who sat opposite in the little booth with wide eyes. 

"It's made of what?!" James exclaimed 

"You guys didn't know that?" (Name) raised an eyebrow 

"What and you did?" Sherlock mimicked "No wonder..you're always picking up random facts." 

"Why would they drink that crap in the first place anyways?" James asked, looking through the Wikipedia article on John's phone. "Like why do they need a weird cat raccoon thing to eat the coffee cherries and then take their poop for the coffee..?"

"It more because of processing rather than the actual crap that comes out." (Name) said "Hey what if I order a large cup of plain coffee and then get some extra cups for free so we don't look stupid while also not spending a shit ton on coffee either?" 

"Good idea, I'm not paying." Sherlock said bluntly 

"Fucking cheapskate." (Name) rolled her eyes "I have enough to buy a cup but it's like twenty quid for a large cup...I'll make sure to get as many sugar packets as possible, okay?" She said, standing up to go order at the counter. Everyone nodded, prompting (name) to leave. 

As she waited in the queue, a man carrying three cups on coffee as well as a few biscuits and cakes in little boxes. His arms were full and he was clearly struggling to keep everything together, not to mention, he looked exhausted! 

With the current rush in the coffee shop, it wasn't really that surprising, but based on the man's appearance, he did seem to be quite the wealthy businessman. She could see the little Cartier watch on his wrist and his suit was clearly expensive. 

Another, likely wealthy, businessman and walked right by him, ruining the balance of items and causing the brown haired gentleman to drop his coffee cups. (Name), who's attention was turned away for a moment as she moved along in the queue, turned around as if she had spidey sense or something. 

Before they could hit the ground though, (name), who was stood fairly close, managed to catch it all in time, almost comically. 

'How the fuck did I manage that..?'

'How on earth did she manage that..?'

"Yikes .." (Name) chuckled awkwardly, "that was a close one" she said, handing the items to him with a small smile. She looked up and met eyes with the stranger, her mind racing back to the other day. 

"You're.." The green eyed man muttered to himself, recognising her as the girl Herder knew of as (Name) 

"I see my reputation really does precede me.." She hummed "The world really is small, huh?" 

"it is indeed," Albert smiled "I've heard..great..things about you and your band." 

(name) blinked in surprise "Really? because I'd expect that Mr Von Herder would paint me out as some sort of war criminal..hah.." her eyes drifted back to the rest of the band in their little booth "I'm assuming he told you about my little musical ambitions.." she said as Sherlock mouthed a 'the fuck are you doing?' to her  

"He did," Albert confirmed with a nod, then looked to his watch on his wrist, cursing under his breath "Deepest apologies, but I must be going..my brothers are waiting for me." He said, somehow retrieve it a business card from his pocket and handing it to a dumbfounded (Name) before taking off. 

Her eyes scanned the card. 

Albert J. Moriarty 

'What a fancy name..' 

(Name) eventually came back as planned, the business card in the pocket of her jacket, and a large cup of black coffee, a few empty cups and a lot of sugar packets. 

"So, were you just eyefucking that rich guy or am I high?" Sherlock asked, right before (name) kicked him in the shin. "Ow!" 

"I wasn't.." she raised her eyebrows, moving her eyes around in a strange manner, conscious of  the members of polite society around them "you know..you lot couldn't hear me, but rich guy was at Herder's the other day, and I just happened to remember him while he was about to drop all his stuff and have a big dramatic disaster." She said, sitting down beside Sherlock, opposite James, who looked anxious to say something. 

"Anyways," (Name) continued with a grin. "He gave me this." She slid the business card onto the middle of the table, recreating that one scene from 'American Psycho' "mission: find potential manager is a success!"  

John picked it up, inspecting it closely, then put it back on the fancy table "this is legit! The card and the font and everything, it looks like a real rich guy business card." 

"I don't think I've ever heard you say legit before." Sherlock said "also how do you know so much about business cards?" 

"A lot of old guys think I'm gay." 

"Moving on," James said, giving John a little side eye before allowing a wide smile to creep up onto his already cheerful face "I have some news~" 

"You're starting an onlyfans?" (Name) asked 

"No-" James scrunched up his nose, looking offended "I, your extraordinary bassist, got us a gig." 

"You did?!" (Name) exclaimed "Are you for real?!" 

"I did indeed," he said smugly, leaning back in the plush seat  "It's a birthday party-" 

"I knew there was gonna be a catch," (Name) sighed, resting her forehead against the table as Sherlock gave her a sympathetic pat on the back. 

James shook his head "it's not a kid's party, don't worry. The birthday girl's turning 18 and she wanted the party to be like a concert I guess, so she wants us to do a hunch of Arctic monkeys covers instead of the usual stuff," he explained 

"If she wanted a concert, then why doesn't she just go to one?" Sherlock groaned 

(Name) lifted her head up "in what universe would the Arctic monkeys play at a birthday party full of kids? Besides, they're not on tour in the uk anymore, so it's not like she could go to a concert for her birthday either." She said "I mean, it's fine as long as the songs she picks out are good...I don't wanna have to play any of the TikTok famous ones anymore." 

"She seems like the type to like every song, but the list I've got is a bit of a mix," James said, pulling out his phone, reading off his notes app "Teddy picker, Bet you look good on the dance floor, cigarette smoke..stuff like that." 

"Well that's bearable then," (name) nodded "When's the party?" 

"Uhhh.." James trailed off nervously "Friday.." 

"Oh, next Fridays alright, a bit soon, but we can manage," she said, brushing away her hair from her face 

"I mean, this Friday..like in four days.." The blond sank into his chair, bracing himself for (Name)'s reaction. 

"What?" She blinked "Are you fucking shitting me?" 

"It'll be fine, (name)," Sherlock reassured, dragging his words  "you always work best under pressure anyways." 

"Yeah well you lot clearly fucking don't." (Name) glared at her friend beside her, then sighed deeply "Okay, this is fine. We'll have to start practicing all the songs immediately, it should be fine considering we've done most of them already," she muttered to herself "The band t-shirts I ordered should be here by Wednesday..we'll be fine..we'll be fine." 

The noirette groaned "see, you're freaking out over nothing."

"As usual." James added. 

(Name) rolled her eyes, taking a sip of her coffee. "As the band leader, I'm the one who needs to be in charge of things until we get a manager, that means I have the right to freak out over this shit." 

"Who made you band leader?" Sherlock asked, raising an eyebrow. 

(Name) scoffed "you think you would do any better? I literally just got us a potential rich manager just by being pretty and memorable. Besides, I'm the leader singer  and guitarist, and the only girl and we all know girls are much more mature than you xy chromosome havers." she said, putting a hand to her chest. 

"She has a point." John agreed 

"Shut up, John." Sherlock kicked him beneath the table. He turned to (name) "So are we gonna start practicing today or..?" 

"I don't know, do you want to sound like shit or..?" (Name) mimicked. "Of course we'll practice today, we don't have that much time, stupid." she said, standing up "We need to make use of the next 100 or so hours we have left." 

"You calculated it?" James asked

She rolled her eyes again "Obviously." 

"I literally have nothing to wear, James, I'm freaking the fuck out," (Name) spoke to her phone, propped up on her desk as she walked around the room "I mean I'm not much of a party goer, so obviously I'm not gonna have party clothes, but I thought, maybe I'd have something!" 

James sighed, his face filling the screen on (name)'s phone as they FaceTimed. "Just put on one of those shirts and a pair of bootcut jeans and you're done." He suggested as she dug through her wardrobe. 

"No, I need something wow, you know. Something that'll make an impression." She said, pulling something out from the hangers. A cheetah print coat. "Perfect." 

"What is it?" James called out to her 

"I just so happened to find this old thing," she said, going back to her phone and showing him the jacket "If anything I own screams arctic monkeys, this definitely does." 

"Ohh..that is clever. You put on some red lipstick and a pair of boots and you're done, might as well change your name to arabella." James smiled before returning to his mirror to apply some eyeliner. "Do you think sherly and John would be ready by now?" 

(Name) rolled her eyes as she's looked for a pair of jeans/black skirt to wear with band t shirt she had got and a pair of black boots, putting her phone down so James could only see her cieling while she changed. "Knowing sherly, he's probably asleep or something. I swear if he didn't wear that outfit I planned for him, I'll beat his ass." 

"Yeah, he really suits that whole emo boy look, I think it's the hair." James agreed as (name) propped her phone back up once she was done. "I'd bring some eyeliner and eyeshadow just in case be does use the cheap stuff you lent him." 

"I'd be surprised if he even managed to open the makeup at all by himself, he's so incompetent." She sat down, quickly putting on her makeup, messing it up on purpose

James laughed "Well at least he can play guitar, half decently." He said "Hey you think I should look through my 2020 alt stuff, see what I can salvage?" 

"God no." (Name) advised. "Unless you plan on getting tomato's thrown at you the entire gig." 

"Yeah you're right," the blond admitted "those boots have outgrown me anyways since I started taking hormones." He said, putting down his eyeliner. "You done yet?" 

"Mhm." 

"Gimme a spin, we need to mutually agree on your cuntiness." James said, his voice going up a couple octaves. 

(Name) snorted in amusement, backing away once she'd finished so he could see her full frame, twirling around, kicking her leg up to the back of her knee as she posed, eliciting a few cheers and 'yas queen slay!'s  (Obviously not in a serious sense) from James. He even took a few screen shots so he could post them on his Instagram story after the 'concert'. 

"Alright. I'm gonna hang up now,so I can get going." She said eventually, thumb hovering over the 'end call' button. "Call sherly and tell him to be at john's in like Ten minutes ish. He's driving us, Yknow." 

"Yeah cool." James said, fixing up his smudged eyeliner, emphasising those bright blue eyes of his. "I'll remind him of your little murder threats, too if you want." 

"Alright, see you later." (Name) chuckled hanging up. 

"Look who's not an hour late," (name) called out her friend as she saw him approaching johns house just as she was about to knock on the door. 

"Look who isn't an hour early," Sherlock retorted. His deep blue eyes landed on a little waggon beside her feet. "Is that..?" 

"My guitar and amp? Yeah, it is." She looked at sherlocks own equipment on his old skateboard "I'm assuming we had a similar idea, just different executions. Just goes to show why I'm smarter than you." 

"Tell that to your exam results." He spat 

(Name) scoffed "as if yours are any better." 

"Bitch." 

"Druggie." 

"Punk." 

"Emo." 

Sherlock gasped dramatically "I am not an emo!" 

"Well either that or your zesty," (name) smirked "I mean, with that hair, you definitely have tried a little more than most." 

"I'll have you know I've only ever been attracted to p-" Sherlock was cut off by the door opening, revealing John and James at the door. 

"There you two are!" John beamed. He looked his usual self, but instead of his usual dull jumper, he wore a black t shirt with the words 'Baker Street boys' in a thick white font, just like the other members, except Sherlock was wearing a pair of baggy dark jeans with an embroidered skull to match his skull ring, (name) was..slaying, to put it simply and James was wearing a pair of pair of straight legged jeans, covered in rhinstones to match the glitter on his eyes. 

"Alright, we all ready? We need to hurry if we wanna get there on time." James said, exiting the door to walk towards johns old car. "Put your stuff in the back and we'll get going." 

"Didnt you say we'd be going to one of those rich neighbourhoods?" (Name) asked, putting her guitar in the boot of the car carefully. 

"Yeah," James nodded, opening the door to the passenger seat "The kids turning 18, so her parents let her do whatever the fuck she wanted. One of those new money types, you know." 

"That explains the money we're getting then." Sherlock said, shutting the door to the boot "If we can get more of their little rich friends to hire us for a parties or something, we'll be rich in no time." 

"Which will only happen if we don't play like shit." (Name) said harshly as she put on her seatbelt "You guys remember the song list?" 

"Considering we've been playing it non stop since Monday, yes, yes we do." James peaked behind his seat to look at her. He looked at Sherlock sat beside her. "You need to get your make up done before we start playing." 

"It's not my fault that shits so difficult." Sherlock groaned, folding his pale arms over his chest "Cant we just do it before we start playing?" 

(Name) sighed "you really are incompetent, arent you?" 

"At least my parents love me." 

"Are you the band?" A girl, about 19 or 20, asked the four at the door. 

(Name) held up her red guitar "obviously." She said "Where should we set up?" 

"Follow me," the girl said, guiding them through the large house to a big hall "There's only a few people here, you're lucky you arrived early." She explained while the band dragged their equipment in there. "You can set up in here, get the band stuff out that car, and you can start playing when there's like more people or whatever. The birthday girl's with her friends right now, but she'll come in here soon." 

"Alright, thanks." James murmured as she walked away "god this place is fucking huge." He said, turning to (Name) who was busy plugging her amp in

"I hate rich people." She whispered to him "Bet they have a pool or like a cinema room or some shit...Wonder how they could afford all this." She turned to Sherlock who had a blank expression "go help John get his drums in, dude." Sherlock rolled his eyes, walking out and dumping his guitar on the floor. 

"Her dad's an mp and her mums like a model, vogue and everything," James said, setting up his bass guitar 

(Name) narrowed her eyes at him as she put the mic down "how do you know that?" 

James chuckled nervously "err..google?" 

"Whatever." She said, turning her attention to Sherlock and John who were bringing in the drums. "Hurry up, I heard some cars pulling up out there. We still have a couple of things to do." 

"Actually we're pretty much done after we put these instruments in place," John said matter of factly then paused "oh wait, Sherlock needs to do his Makeup." 

"You're making me sound like a girl." Sherlock glared "I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. (Name), can't you help me out?” He begged with a whiney voice. 

“Sit down.” She said, pointing to the drummers stool before pulling out her makeup bag, kneeling before him. “Close your eyes.” She said, applying dark blue eyeshadow on the centre of sherlocks eyelids, surrounding it with glittery black eyeshadow on the edges. She took out an eyeliner pencil, asking Sherlock to open his eyes again and look up while she applied it to his waterline, smudging it slightly. 

“Done.” She held up her pocket mirror to his face. He took it, looking at his eyes slowly. “You look like Effy stonem if she was a guy.” 

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Sherlock said, shutting the motto and handing it back to (name) who was putting away her makeup. “Thanks.” He said reluctantly. 

“Don’t mention it.” (Name) stood up, checking the mic to make sure it was working correctly. 

John peaked outside the open entrance, looking down the hall to see a storm of teenagers, mostly 17 and 18. He turned to the band, sitting down by his drums “ready?” 

“Barely.” (Name) groaned, watching the crowd gradually form while someone switched off the lights. She could smell the faint stench of alcohol flood the air, along with the scent of body odour and..was that weed..? 

“PST,” someone hissed from the side of the makeshift stage. It was the girl from earlier, the birthday girl’s older sister. “Hurry up, these kids are waiting.” She whispered 

(Name) ran a hand through her (hair colour) hair, messing it up on purpose as she picked up her guitar, leaning forward to the mic in front of her. 

(Quick A/N: this is the first song btw, super good, please listen to it.) 

It made a loud noise before she spoke. “Um..we’re the Baker Street boys,” she said nervously “Happy birthday,” she shut her eyes trying to remember the name 

“Tabitha, happy birthday Tabitha.” She repeats. “My name’s (Name), f-from the Baker Street boys, here with Sherlock,” cue a few giggles at his name “James, and our drummer, John.” She hesitantly smiled. “And this is ‘I bet that you look good on the dance floor, by the Arctic Monkeys, which is funny because uh..we’re doing only arctic monkeys covers today, haha.” 

Crickets. 

“A-Anyways, make some noise, or whatever.” She muttered as she took a deep breath, strumming her guitar while John started drumming. “Stop making the eyes at me, and I’ll stop making the eyes at you.” Her voice had cracked mid line in a whine, but somehow she had pulled it off, sparking a few of the sweaty teenagers to start singing along, despite it not being a typical TikTok song. 

“What it is that surprises me is that I don’t really want you to,” she sang, gripping the mic with one song whilst the rest of the band played in the background. 

Surprisingly or not, (name) was stiff, lacking any stage presence she may have previously had while she attempted to sing and play at the same time. She couldn’t believe she was thinking this, but thank god Sherlock was there as the backup guitarist. 

“And your shoulders are frozen,” She continued, slowly getting more confident 

“Cold as the night!” 

At least the others managed to remember to do back up vocals. 

“Oh but you’re an explosion!” (Name) had slowly begun to realise the rawness in her voice actually made this particular cover sound fairly good, and with the encouragement of those around her, the confidence had started to settle in. 

“You’re dynamite!” 

“Your name isn’t Rio but I don’t care for sand and lighting the fuse might result in a bang b-b-bang-oh!” She sang, fingers pointed in a gun while the other strummed at the guitar strapped over her chest “I bet that you look good on the dance floor, I don’t know if you’re looking for romance or, I don’t know what you’re looking for! I said I bet that you look good on the dance floor, dancing to electro pop like a robot from 1984, well from 1984!”  

“I wish that you’d stop ignoring me because it’s sending me to despair. Without a sound, yeah you’re calling me, and I don’t think it’s very fair,” she raised her voice slightly as she tried to sing over the increasingly loud crowd before her, her body much less stiff than when she started. She continued with the chorus, earning a few cheers as the band played better with each passing second. 

“Well from 1984..!” She almost panted, losing breath as she strained her vocal chords “Oh, there ain't no love, no Montagues or Capulets, Just banging tunes and DJ sets and dirty dance floors and dreams of naughtiness” 

While she sang that particular line, a face popped into her head, or rather the face. What was the posh blond man doing in her thoughts while she was screaming her lungs out singing some indie rock song? 

“Well I bet that you look good on the dance floor! I don’t know if you’re looking for romance or what, I don’t know what you’re looking for!!” Frankly, she doubted she would ever see him again, as upsetting as that seemed. Not like she had much of a chance though. “I said, I bet that you look good on the dance floor,” it would be funny, a smart guy with a rockstar wannabe like her “d-dancing to electro-pop like a robot from 1984,” She did want to see him again though…but he was probably an apparition or something, that explained why he looked so angelic. No. She had to see him again some day.

“Said from 1984!”

A/N: I wonder what will happen next >:). I’m so sorry for those who are only reading for Liam, I promise he’s gonna make another appearances in like a couple of chapters. Also this arc is kinda inspired by the Pistols series so watch that because it’s so good. Off topic but I got a cat and he’s so cute but also looks like Alex turner it’s hilarious.

[charlotte-official]

THE STEAMBIRD - 10/17 to 11/7

Note from Charlotte!

Ah!!! Hiya everybody! I’m so, so, so, so, so sorry I’m late. Waaay too late, in fact! It’s been three whole weeks!! I’m so sorry for procrastinating even though this was supposed to be out last week!! There just wasn’t a lot of material for me to work with-

(and irl stuff got in the way, oops)

-and so I ended up just writing these small blurbs instead.

I swear that next week I’ll get back on track to writing the regular issues!! But for now, I’m going to count this as a Steambird ‘special…’

Again I’m super sorry!!

The Duke of Meropide, Wriothesley, reluctantly allowed Charlotte to pay a visit to the Fortress of Meropide to interview a certain Fatui Harbinger (Tartaglia) on the pot brownie scandal. All thanks to the Head Nurse of the Fortress, Sigewinne. Regrettably enough, the Harbinger was not even present at the Fortress, so the interview was thus cancelled.

Clone of Harbinger, Dottore, (clone in question is Webttore), complains about alleged “loudness' ' coming from Il Dottore and another fellow harbinger, Pantalone- the Regrator and 9th Fatui Harbinger. Which yes, indeed implies that the two were being intimate if you catch my drift. 

Sandrone, 7th Fatui Harbinger, backs up the claim and Dottore retorts back saying that Sandrone was loud during the night with Arlecchino, founder of the House of the Hearth and 4th Fatui Harbinger, as well.

Does this mean Fatui Harbingers are essentially hooking up with each other?

Maybe.

It depends if Webttore, Dottore, and Sandrone are reliable sources.

Light of Ksharewar’s anon- scary, in particular- was exposed to have a bad sleep schedule despite consistently reprimanding Kaveh for having a bad sleep schedule himself. Kaveh was upset since this was naturally a display of hypocrisy, and Kaveh, alongside his other anon, ᓚᘏᗢ (cat) anon- now more commonly known as “adi cat anon”- chided scary anon. 

Scary anon then attempted to flee and hide in Diluc Ragvindr- owner of the Dawn Winery-’s blog, but upon learning about what had happened- via cat anon- also chided the anon, who then left again to try and hide out in the Duke of Meropide’s blog!

Rinse and repeat because cat anon followed after scary anon and informed the Duke, who told them not to hide in general. Thus ending the blog hopping scandal.

Later, scary and Kaveh squabble about sleeping habits (after Kaveh shrugs off the incident, saying it was really all in good fun), and cat anon tells them to BOTH fix their sleeping habits, Kaveh gains two more anons, yellow heart anon- the second parent- and wine anon- the menace. Kaveh also tries to send wine anon to the Fortress of Meropide.

Diluc and UTA are still not beating the allegations.

Pantalone offers a 500k bounty of mora for whoever helps solve his rat infestation(literally all of the rats in question are just Dottore’s clones) regarding his office. When a young girl solves the issue, the bounty ends up being worth triple the original amount.

Webtorre tries to sell a.. Really weird looking skull. 3 rats in a trench coat are down to buy it. ..and also 3 rats in a trench coat tries to give Collei the plague

The Regrator gets robbed. With a lack of a solution or person to blame, naturally everyone just begins to blame each other frantically.

Kaveh confesses to actually being three fungi in a trench coat.

Head Nurse of the Fortress of Meropide, Sigewinne, pastes stickers all over the Fortress of Meropide. Especially in the Duke of Meropide’s office.

Kaeya makes it down Dragonspine safely, or has he? No. No he hasn’t. He lost his vision on the mountain, so now, while Diluc is now taking his brother to the Dawn Winery, Lisa is trying to gather a team to go back up the mountain to look for it.

(Ignoring the Dragonspine RP canon and following Albedo and Diona going to Sumeru.)

Albedo wakes up from a nightmare, and Diona tries to comfort the alchemist.

Dottore(Prime) releases a poll on the crowd’s favorite Dottore. Ask-Dottore ended up winning, but the close second was UTA. Most notably, Madame Faruzan’s bias was UTA, while Diluc said none were likable altogether.

[just-a-random-raccoon]

Day 27 & 28: Dancing and Hotel California.

I really love gay people. Did I tell you how much I love them?

Also, don't hope this to be too happy haha. I always have angst for these two. But it's just, slightly.

Also used this reference

I found it on Pinterest, but still couldn't find the author

Fanfic under the cut!

Jack woke up in the hotel room, he didn't remember exactly what happened last night but he for sure knew he has a headache. He let out a groan really wanting to just lay down, the worse it's that the purple man who he had traveled to Vegas with has gotten all the bed for himself.

So he has to satisfy with the floor.

He tried to remember last night again, he saw the bottles, of course they had drunk, it wasn't Vegas without getting drunk, the cigarettes he had reserved were now in the table too far away from him. One already used, and of course, his bow tie has been unmade with his suit made a mess.

Wonder who is the cause of this.

Suddenly he focused more on the radio, it was playing Hotel California. One of his favorite songs. It has been playing on loop since last night.

Then, suddenly drifting off by the lyrics he remembers what happened.

...

"On a dark desert highway

Cool wind in my hair

Warm smell of colitas

Rising up through the air"

He remembers walking through a highway, searching for a bar to pass by. He needed to get wasted, do something, the smell of colitas was becoming him crazy. He didn't liked it, the good thing it was calm and the cool wind was helping him with calming him down.

"Up ahead in the distance

I saw a shimmering light

I had to stop for the night"

My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim

He finally saw a bar and he had to stop for the night, he was feeling lightheaded so it was that or nothing. The hotel was too far away to go back now and he didn't find his purple companion. He didn't know where he could have gone but probably he would see him in the morning.

"There she stood in the doorway

I heard the mission bell

And I was thinkin' to myself

"This could be heaven or this could be hell" "

He didn't expect when he entered a bar to recognize a certain purple fellow sitting on the chair getting some drinks. 'This could be heaven or hell' he thought. There was a bell ringing probably Dave calling the bartender. The lights were hitting in all the place and 'Hotel California' was playing.

"Then she lit up a candle

And she showed me the way"

He didn't knew how much he drunk, he just knew that right now Dave invited him to dance, Jack accepted hoping it was just as homies. The purple man showed him the way to the dance floor smiling. They put in position to dance, Jack grabbing Dave's waist gently and holding his hand and Dave holding Jack's hand and grabbing gently his neck.

"There were voices down the corridor

I thought I heard them say

"Welcome to the Hotel California

Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)

Such a lovely face"

He saw the purple man's face, it was for him very pretty, maybe he drink more than he should or maybe he was high, but the feelings for him started to grown. The two were dancing the better they could when you're drunk, but it was indeed a nice dance in a lovely place.

"Plenty of room at the Hotel California

Any time of year (any time of year)

You can find it here" "

He enjoyed the moment with the music, he was holding Old Sport legally, he couldn't waste the chance. Jack was the one leading the dance with sometimes Dave taking the lead. But he really wanted Sportsy to kiss him already. There was plenty of room for that after all.

"Her mind is Tiffany-twisted

She got the Mercedes-Benz, uh

She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys

That she calls friends"

Jack couldn't never figure Dave's mind, what was thinking the purple man? Why was he so nervous around him? Maybe he is missing something. Or maybe he could just lean in and... No he couldn't...

"How they dance in the courtyard

Sweet summer sweat

Some dance to remember

Some dance to forget"

Jack remembered how to dance because he saw Peter and Caroline do it plenty of times in the living room, so he didn't have a problem. This moment was sweet, now he knows why Peter liked to dance with her. Meanwhile Dave just wanted to forget the aching pain on his heart that was asking him to just get Old Sport to the hotel room and start kissing him entirely.

"So I called up the Captain

"Please bring me my wine"

He said, "We haven't had that spirit here

Since 1969" "

Everything was fuzzy since here, but he does remember Dave trying to lean in, he was so nervous and he wanted to kiss. But he couldn't. It was wrong, everything was wrong. He went running asking for wine to the bartender. The only answer he got is "We haven't had that spirit here since 1969"

"And still, those voices are calling

From far away

Wake you up in the middle of the night

Just to hear them say"

He could still heard the music playing, and he could heard those voices scream at him to go back to the dance floor and kiss him, to feel him, to be with him. But he couldn't, he was a coward, he couldn't even accept his fate.

"Welcome to the Hotel California

Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)

Such a lovely face

They're livin' it up at the Hotel California

What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise)

Bring your alibis" "

He remembered Dave's beautiful face twitching with disappointed, he could remember the nice surprise he got for him, but he just went running away like he always does. Ignoring his problems. He did it with Dee, he did it with the souls, and now with this.

"Mirrors on the ceiling

The pink champagne on ice

And she said, "We are all just prisoners here

Of our own device" "

"And in the master's chambers

He was surprised Dave sit beside him and ordered a pink champagne, none of them say a word, just the music playing with some whispers from the people, he was about to tell him how he felt, but he decided to remain quiet.

They gathered for the feast

They stab it with their steely knives

"Last thing I remember

But they just can't kill the beast"

The two wanted to talk, but they couldn't. Jack has been through too much with him, broke his promise, killed his old boss' "son", killed five kids. But, all he couldn't get done and never will is talking about feelings. He was shitty expressing all to his siblings and he is now shitty expressing it to the one besides him.

I was running for the door

I had to find the passage back

" "Relax, " said the night man

To the place I was before"

He couldn't take it anymore and went running to the hotel room, he needed to get out of Vegas, he needed to get out of this place. His head was dizzy and he was about to pass out, Jack was about to open the hotel room.

"We are programmed to receive

You can check out any time you like

But you can never leave!" "

Until a certain purple hand got him, "What's wrong Sportsy?" He whispered. "Just relax and tell me". The orange man turned to see him face to face, maybe it was him about to pass out, maybe he was out of his right mind. But he kissed him, he kissed him and doesn't remember nothing else later.

...

Maybe he should stop getting wasted in bars from now on.

[calculatesguilt]

As a fellow dr.atchet disliker, I would like to hear your detailed thoughts on the ship, if you don't mind. For me, I feel the ship fundamentally does not work. There are even certain events within MTMTE that make them liking each other to be questionable.

Oh yeah, totally.

So to start off I would like to mention that I do not like how JRo writes religion and religious characters. One of these exceptions is Cyclonus because his beliefs are actually respected. Now, the way he writes it comes off very much as "Culturally Xtian Atheist Who Thinks All Religion Is Bad." Who's to say if this is true but he very much comes off that way.

This is important for later. I'll be breaking it down into three points:

The power imbalance

Ratchet's toxic atheism

JRo world makes prior relationships characters had meaningless

The Power Imbalance

I feel like an insane person at times when I think about this. As in "Am I just crazy or are people completely ignorant to it."

First off: The only interaction we have between Drift and Ratchet in MTMTE (Season 1) is the Pharma situation and when Drift recounts Ratchet saving his life. This, I feel, became the basis of their... sorta friendship (hard to call it that when all we were given was bits and pieces.)

This exchange has always felt a little off-kilter to me because this is... This is a Doctor taking care of a Patient. I believe Ratchet meant what he said but for this to be the foundational aspects — the driving force behind their relationship has never really sat well with me. I could See Drift looking UP to Ratchet for that, and indeed this is where the power imbalance comes from.

There's also this from Empire of Stone. Drift is pouring out his heart, telling ratchet his greatest fears and why he's doing what he's doing and what he's most afraid of becoming again.

And how does Ratchet initially respond?

I get this is supposed to be a joke and bring levity to the moment but it just doesn't work.

It's never really felt like they were on equal ground, and it's never felt like they come to that equal footing. When we reach the end we're supposed to believe they did eventually but we're rewarded for nothing. There is no actual substance or growth shown, if anything the majority of what we're shown in Lost Light is Ratchet constantly belittling and mocking Drift. Which brings me to:

Ratchet's Toxic Atheism

Drift makes a good point here but Ratchet's never really shown to be wrong about how he treats religion. In fact he's rewarded for it and does the ultimate Uber Atheist Boner of "proving religion wrong" on Mederi.

Ratchet became a stand-in for JRo's soapboxing and to pair him with Drift in the end is like. It sucks! It feels bad! And Ratchet is never criticized for how he treats religious people or religion save from Drift and it is always played off as a joke!!

Then, at the end, we're not given Real closure to this fact, we're given this which completely cheapens them and feels completely undeserved. We were not shown this growth. We were not shown this change We were shown, foor the most part, Ratchet being a complete dickhead to Drift. (And frankly everyone around him.)

(I would pull up more examples but my dedication of rereading mtmte/ll for this isn't that powerful.)

It's JRo World

One of my biggest gripes with mtmte/ll is that characters relationships prior to the series are not carried over. Which would be fine if this was aiming for a soft-reboot of IDW1's era, however it... really isn't. It builds upon a lot of prior writing and a lot of current writing from the sister series of RiD (especially in regards to Megatron.) So having absolutely no prior relationships carry over (Perceptor and Drift. Ratchet and literally anyone else other than Drift. Rodimus and Drift just in general with their shoddy writing in the later half.) makes it feel... what's the word I'm looking for... incomplete, I suppose

It feels like he wanted to have pre-established relationships between these characters but didn't want to build off actual pre-established relationships so he created one between Drift and Ratchet and it just doesn't work for me.

Anyways I'm sure there's plenty more examples out there that I've missed but I cannot bother to go thru the entire comic series for them flakjslfdkj.

[flowerfan2]

As Low As a Rattlesnake’s Bellybutton - Ch. 2

This is a series of episode codas forming one unified story about Ted and Trent.  Read Chapter 2 on A03 here.  Spoilers for released Season 2 episodes.

******

Ted shuffles his papers around on his desk as he watches Trent leave the office.  It wouldn’t do to have folks realize just how close he and Trent are, even if the sight of him in that navy jacket and purple shirt does make Ted’s mouth water.  No, he thinks they are right to play their relationship close to the vest for now.  Trent’s standing with the team is shaky enough, and Ted doesn’t want to get in the way.

Ted leaves Nelson Road a few minutes later, and gets to Trent’s place just as the man himself is removing that very fine navy jacket.  

“Glad you saved this outfit for today,” Ted says, taking hold of Trent by his polka dot tie and leaning in to brush a soft kiss across Trent’s lips.  “Gave me something to look forward to all week.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Trent replies dryly.  “You hardly looked at me all day.”

Ted can’t help but grin.  “I tried not to be too obvious.  But I think the team knows I like you.”

Trent walks into the kitchen where he starts taking boxes of Thai food out of the refrigerator.  “What do you think gave it away?  Going against the wishes of Rebecca, Keely and Higgins to let me spend the season with Richmond, or making Roy share his office?”

“I don’t rightly know,” Ted replies, getting out a plate for each of them as they pass the boxes back and forth.  “Maybe it’s the way I always save the last few satays for you,” he says, placing two skewers on Trent’s plate.

“I don’t think Roy Kent needs to see how we divide up our leftover take-away to suss out that you like me.  What was it you said to him when you pulled him off for a lecture from the headmaster?”

“I suppose you mean like getting called to the principal’s office?”  Ted sets their plates into the microwave and turns it on, stepping back and leaning against the countertop.  “I told him to make a choice from the vegan menu, that’s all.  Squash that beef he had with you.”

Trent just stares at him, then shakes his head.  “You’ve been dying to tell me that one all night, haven’t you?”

“Thought it was pretty witty.”

“You are indeed.”  

Ted feels a blush coloring his cheeks as they take their plates and a few bottles of beer over to the table.  Trent makes him blush on the regular, and he can’t say that he minds it.  

Later, after they’ve finished eating and given the kitchen a quick clean-up, they flop onto the couch and turn the television on low out of habit more than anything else.  Ted pulls Trent a litter closer, lets him lean against his chest, and drifts his fingers through his lovely hair.  

“Is it different, being with Richmond for your book, instead of as a reporter?”

Trent tilts his head up to look at Ted and then sighs back down.  “I imagine you already know the answer to that question.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No, but it seems like you do.”

Ted snorts a little.  “Got me there, Times Square.  I just don’t want my guy to look so glum all the time.”

“What, did I look glum today?  When silence descended each time I came into the locker room, and Roy Kent accused me of ruining his childhood?”

“He did what now?”  Ted shifts them up, looking Trent in the eye.  “Do I need to have another talk with that fellow?  Because I thought I made my point with him, but he runs deep, you never know.”

“Ugh, it wasn’t quite that bad.  It just turns out that something I wrote when he was starting out really had an effect on him.”

“I’ve always thought your writing was effective.”

“Not a good effect.  It was… mean-spirited.  An attempt to get attention for myself, at his expense.”

“Ouch.”  Ted brushes a long strand of hair out of Trent’s face.  “Did you two talk it through?  As a crew?”

“As a – I assume this is one of your American idioms, but I suppose yes, we did.”

“We will discuss getting you up to speed on critical pop culture references later, but as far as you and Roy - you think he’s good with you now?”  Ted had really meant to make Trent watch <i>Our Flag Means Death</i> over the summer but somehow their burgeoning need to make out whenever they didn’t have the kids around had taken up all their free time.

“Ted, the man kept a scrap of the newspaper article where I lambasted him in his wallet for all these years – since he was seventeen.  What does that say about me, hmm?”

“I think it says more about Roy than it says about you, but I get it.  Things hit hard when you’re young.  I can’t imagine all that pressure, the whole world’s eyes on you, when you’re really still just a kid.”  The words are barely out of his mouth when Ted realizes he isn’t going to get away with it, not with Trent’s whole expression changing to one of concern.

“From what you’ve told me, you had your own share of worries when you were a teenager,” Trent says gently. Trent knows about Ted’s father, knows that when Ted was seventeen his loss was fresh.  

“Yeah, but people weren’t counting on me to make or break their favorite team.  Generally my relatives kept their nasty comments out of the papers, at least.”

“Nasty comments?”

“You know, Ted’s the man of the house now, wonder if he can handle it, that kind of thing.”  Ted clears his throat and tries to change the subject.  “I wish I knew you when you were that age.  Bet everyone thought you were just amazing, smart and quick and good with words, most likely to succeed and all that.”

“That, and shame he’s a poof.”

“Ugh, well, shit.  I’m sorry.  But I guess this whole conversation proves my point.”

“What was your point again?”

“We’ve all had stuff said about us that wasn’t that cool, and we’ve all probably said things that weren’t that cool.  Roy’s certainly let loose enough verbal ammunition in his time.  Now that you two have gotten it out in the open, it’ll be okay.”

“I doubt he’s going to forgive me just like that.”

“Huh, well, you up for a challenge?”

“I’m here with you, aren’t I?”

“Is that what this is?”

Trent tugs Ted around and kisses him, gently at first, but soon the heat is building between them, Trent bracketing Ted’s head with his hands and shifting until Ted is laid out underneath him on the couch, his hair falling in a gray and brown curtain around their faces.  Ted loves it like this, loves feeling Trent’s weight on him, Trent all around him.  He feels wanted, and cared for, and safe.  And really damn turned on.  They break apart to breathe, and Ted rubs his nose against Trent’s, happiness and desire making him silly with it.

“Can you stay the night?” Trent asks, and Ted sighs.  

“I want to, but I can’t.  I’m meeting Beard first thing in the morning.  Rain check?”  

“Of course.”  

They make out for a few more minutes, but the knowledge that they don’t have a lot of time keeps it lazy and relaxed.  Eventually they drag themselves up off the couch, smiling shyly at each other’s mussed clothes and Trent’s wild hair, and Trent escorts Ted to the door.

“See you at work tomorrow,” Ted says.

“I like the sound of that,” Trent replies, leaning in for one more kiss.  “Good night, sport.”

“Oooh, touché!”  Ted says, beaming at Trent.  “We’re gonna have a lot of fun with that, aren’t we?”

“One can only hope.”

Ted can feel the spring in his step as he makes his way to the tube stop.  Richmond may have its challenges, and there are still a million or so geographical miles between him and his son, but one of his very favorite people is going to be at Nelson Road with him every day for a while, and that is absolutely something to smile about.  

[itsalwayswellattheworldsend]

Book 2 Chapter 38 - A Friend Gives Ralph Warning

Text Audio

Synopsis:

Someone warns Ralph about a danger to his life, and offers a plan of escape.

Summary:

"Fair lord, I would that I might do something for thine avail, and perchance I may: but it is hard to do good deeds in Hell, especially for one of its devils."

The next day, Ralph wandered around the Dale wherever he wanted, and no one stopped him. As he walked east along the stream to where the valley began to narrow, he saw a man sitting on the bank fishing with a rod, and when he came closer the man turned around and saw him. He put down his rod and got to his feet, standing to face Ralph, looking sheepish, with his hands down by his sides.

Ralph—who was thinking of other things—wondered what the man wanted. “Hail, good fellow! What do you need?” he said.

“I want to thank you,” said the man.

“What for?” said Ralph, but as he looked he realized that this man was Redhead, whose pardon he had gained from the Lord the day before; so he held out his hand and took Redhead’s, giving him a friendly smile. Redhead looked at him straight in the face, and though he was both big and rough-looking, he did not seem like a rogue.

He said: “Fair lord, I want to do something to help you—and I might be able to—but it is hard to do good deeds in Hell, especially for one of its devils.”[1]

“Is it really that bad?” asked Ralph.

“Not for you, but it might get that bad. Listen, lord, there is no one around to see us, so I will tell you right out, since later might be too late: Whatever happens, do not go to Utterbol.”

“Okay,” said Ralph, “But what if I’m forced to go there?”

“I can see that you are favored and free to go wherever you want around the camp. Therefore, it will be easy for you to leave under cover of night and cloud, or in the grey of the morning, when you have a chance—which I will tell you about. Again I say: do not go to Utterbol. You are too good to be made into a devil like us, so you will be tortured until your life is ruined, and by that road you will be sent to heaven.”

“But you just said that I was favored by the Lord.”

“Yes,” said Redhead, “and that might last until you are commanded to do some villainous deed and refuse, as I know you will. Then it’s all over and I know what my Lord has planned for you.”

“And what’s that?”

“He has bought you to be given to his wife as a toy and plaything, and if she likes you you might do well for a while. But the first time he gets a chance and she is tired of you (for she is as fickle as a weathervane), he will seize you and take your manhood away, then let you drift around Utterbol to be the laughingstock of everyone else. Already in his heart he hates you.”

Ralph thought about this, for it spoke to the fears he already held in his heart. But how could he not go to Utterbol when the Maiden was waiting there to be rescued? But then again, if he did go there and was caught, that would ruin things for both of them.

At last he said: “Good man, this may be true, but how can I know before taking the risk of running away? It seems like in Utterbol I would be held in a place of honor.”

To which Redhead replied: “There is no honor in Utterbol except for those who are unworthy of honor. But the danger I spoke of is real, and I’ll tell you where I heard of this plan, since you have done such a kind thing for me. It was told to me yesterday evening by a woman who is in the close confidence of the Lady of Utterbol, and is well-liked by the Lord also[2]: and the thought occurred to me as well when I considered your situation. So I tell you to beware, for it would sadden me greatly if you were cast away.”

“Well,” said Ralph, “let’s sit here on the bank and you can tell me more, but keep fishing in case someone sees us.”

So they sat down and Redhead did as Ralph said, and he continued: “Lord, I have told you to flee, but this is a bad country to flee from. Indeed, there is only one place where you might get away from this group between here and Utterbol, and we will camp there on the second day after we leave here. But I must say that this is no road for a coward, as it leads through the forest up into the mountains. But for a man as strong and as bold as you, I think you should take it, and I can see to it that your escape from this group will be easy. Just make up your mind quickly, since your chance is drawing close, and once you come to Utterbol with all these people, the house will be full and there will be others watching you, and fleeing will be impossible. It’s like this: on the second night, not only are the woods nearby to cover your escape, but I will be the lead guard on the side of the camp where you will be staying, and I’ll be able to help you get out. If I were better, I would ask you to take me with you, but as it is I will not burden you with that request.”

“Yes,” said Ralph, “I’ve had one guide in this land already, and he betrayed me. This is a matter of life and death, so I’ll just ask right out: how do I know that you won’t also betray me?”

Redhead jumped to his feet and yelled: “What could I possibly say to make you believe me? I swear by my father’s soul that I am not betraying you. May all the curses of Utterbol fall seven-times heavier upon me if I prove to be your traitor or coward.”

“Quiet, lad, quiet;[3] Someone might hear you. Suffice to say that if you make so much noise, I’m forced to believe you.”

Then Redhead sat down again and despite how strong and rough a man he was, he began crying.

“No, no,” said Ralph, “this is worse than the other noise. I believe you as well as a man can who is dealing with an acquaintance with whom he lacks the experience to know the truth clearly. Get a hold of yourself and let’s look this matter square in the face—and quickly, too, in case someone nosy comes by and sees us. There you go. Now, do you know why I came into this dangerous and tyrannical land in the first place?”

“I heard that you are on the quest of the Well at the World’s End.”

“And that is the truth,” said Ralph.

“Well then,” continued Redhead, “all the more reason you should escape at the time I have mentioned. There is a sage who lives in the woods between that place and the Great Mountains, and he knows many things about the Mountains and the Well itself. And they say that if he lends his guidance, it puts one on the road to success. What do you say about that?”

“I say that the Sage could be helpful if I can find him, but there’s another reason I have come this way from Goldburg.”

“What’s that?”

“To go to Utterbol.”

“Heaven help us!” cried Redhead, “why would you do that?”

“It’s probably not wise to tell you, but I do really trust you. So listen: I am going to Utterbol to save a friend of mine. This friend is a woman—hold on a second—and this woman has recently been brought to Utterbol, I believe, after being taken from the hands of one of the mountain men that live beyond Cheaping Knowe.”

Redhead stared at him in astonishment, and stayed silent for a while, then said: “Now all the more I tell you to flee! Doubtless the woman is there, for it would take someone as fair and noble as that newly-caught thrall to draw someone as fair and noble as you are to her. But what good is it? If you go to Utterbol, it will be the end for both of you. We can all see that the Lord has set his love on this maiden, and if you come to Utterbol the Lord will immediately see that there is love between you two, and that will be the end of the story.”

“How so?” asked Ralph.[4]

“At Utterbol, everyone does as the Lord of Utterbol says, and he is so lustful and cruel and dishonest that he would be willing to torture the maiden to death and to mutilate and castrate you, so that no one will know that you were once handsome.”

“Redhead,” said Ralph, his heart moved, “Though you are not a knight, you must see that it would be good for a friend to die with a friend.”

“Yes, surely,” said Redhead, “If that’s the best you can do to help. Don’t you want to help the maiden? When you come back from your quest to the Well at the World’s End, you will be so powerful and glorious that the Lord of Utterbol can be swept aside like an annoying dog, and then you can help her. But as it is now, I say and swear to you, that three days after you have met your beloved in Utterbol, she will be dead. I wish that you could ask someone closer to the Lord than I, so you could hear the same thing from them.”

Now to tell the truth, this was what Ralph had feared would happen, and he could hardly doubt Redhead’s word. So he sat there thinking about things for a good while, and at last he said: “My friend, I will entrust you with another thing: I’m thinking about fleeing to the woods like you said, and from there go to Utterbol to save the maiden.”

“Okay, and how would you do that?”

“What if I went there in disguise, so that I would not be recognized by either the maiden or her captors?”

Redhead said: “There would be danger in that, but also hope. Yes, you might be able to do that if you find the Sage and tell him your story. If he favors you, he might change your clothes and appearance, for he knows much lore.”

“Well,” said Ralph, “Rest assured that on that night you mentioned, I will do my best to escape the company of this tyrant and his thralls, unless I hear other news and have to change my plans. But I will ask you to give me a sign that everything is still going as planned before I go.”

“I will do that. I’ll come by on the evening before your escape at the latest, but hopefully on the evening before then if possible.”

“Then I’ll go now,” said Ralph, “and I thank you very much for your help, and I consider you a friend. If you change your mind about fleeing with me, I would be happy to travel with you.”

Redhead shook his head but said nothing, and Ralph continued on through the valley.

Notes:

[1a] I speculate that Redhead is an outlander, like Ralph. This is mostly because he seems to uniquely detest Utterbol and its practices, even as he participates in them. To contrast, Otter knows that Utterbol is bad, but doesn’t really seem to be bothered by it on any deep level. He gives a sort of “Yeah it’s bad but it could be worse,” vibe, I think. Redhead seems to see himself as someone who’s in too deep and stuck, but wants to help others avoid his fate.

[1b] As I said, this is speculation. We don’t get much else to determine his origin, as “Redhead” is almost certainly not his actual name (so I can’t try and compare his name to others’), and other than that we know that he’s big and has red hair (I assume, at least, since I don’t think that’s actually been explicitly stated yet). Red hair doesn’t really tell us anything—as I’ve said before, everyone seems to be pretty English or Scottish. He references hell and heaven, while others in this land mostly lack religious language.

[2] Agatha’s meddling has reached Ralph.

[3] Ralph calls Redhead “lad” here, which strikes me as odd because it seems like Ralph is generally younger than other characters, and this sounds like he’s talking to someone younger than him. It may be that “lad” has broader usage, or maybe he sees Redhead’s outburst as immature. Who knows?

[4] Idk, Ralph, maybe he’ll kill you like everyone else you’ve met has already told you?

Map:

[monstermaster13]

Nathan Forester and his team of Dan Aykroyd characters consisting of Elwood Blues (from the Blues Brothers), Ellis Fielding (from Loose Cannons), Grocer (from Grosse Pointe Blank), John Burns Jr (from The Couch Trip), Ray Stantz, Beldar, Ray Zalinski, Clifford Skridlow, Mike Webber, Irwin Mainway, Darren ‘Mother’ Roscow, and Frank Tree, were a crime-fighting team that fought villains and brought them to justice. Nathan himself had powers, he was a Were-Aykroyd who fought villains and lived a spectacular double life, which gave him the best of both, brains and brain at the same time.

He and his fellow Aykroydantaiums took down the dreaded Aykroydastians consisting of Vic Frohmeyer, the undead version of Elwood, Bob (from Susan’s Plan), Pa Tex, and Wade Motch, these Aykroydian trouble-makers were the ultimate in evil, always trying to ruin Nathan’s good time and trying to make his Were-Aykroyd side turn evil just like them. One afternoon, the Aykroydastaniums were sick of losing to Nathan and they gathered together at Pa Tex’s ranch

for a new evil plan.

“That Nathan is always ruining our plans.”

“Indeed he is, if only his were-aykroyd side wasn’t a hero.”

“That way we wouldn’t be grounded.”

‘It is indeed not fair in the slightest.’ Wade Motch added. ‘That we get grounded and we have to eat lumpy potatoes.’ ‘Yes, those potatoes are the real monsters, not us.’ ‘What if we actually did get the Were-Aykroyd side to turn evil and fully corrupted Nathan into becoming Aykroydian and forgetting who he is?’ ‘Oh yes, that sounds devious and I love it.’ ‘But how do we do that? We can’t sway that goodie two shoes Were-Aykroyd into being a villain, he is so heavily devoted to justice.’

‘Maybe there is a way.’ ‘Bob, are you pondering what i’m pondering?’ ‘I think so Frohmeyer, but if people celebrated Christmas all year, wouldn’t Christmas itself be pointless and just another day?’ ‘Time to use our dark powers to influence that Were-aykroyd.’ The group of evil Aykroyd characters laughed as they began to work on a special plan to get that were-aykroyd alter-ego of Nathan’s to be evil. Meanwhile at the appointment, Nathan and his Aykroydian brothers in the Aykroydantiums had just returned from battling villains and were looking forward to relaxing and hanging out together.

“We did it guys, we taught those demons a lesson.”

“Oh yes, we certainly did, well done to all of us.”

“Couldn’t have done it without you guys.”

“Aaaaw, do you really mean that?”

“Yes, you’re all my brothers and I love you.”

Nathan hugged Louis Winthorpe III, Elwood and Darren ‘Mother’ Roskow, as Grocer chuckled, happy that he was able to use his hitman skills for good. ‘Your were-aykroyd form also kicked some serious butt, pal and i’m very impressed.’ ‘I’ve been training a lot since we first met and i’ve learned that my were-aykroyd self isn’t too different from me, we both like horror, we like monsters, we like fighting evil, and we are both awesome.’

“I am glad he is on our side.’ ‘As I am. I never can imagine him being evil.’ ‘’Well come on, on boys, let’s just chill and hang out.’ That afternoon the team hung out together with Mel and That Werebelushi In The Shades, they listened to music and when the evening came around, everything was very eventful and they decided to take it easy.

When night-time came around they spent a lovely time together indoors watching all the movies they were from, after they all got ready for bed a couple of hours later, Nathan got into bed and he told the Aykroydantiums and Mel and Matthias to keep watch after he had brushed his teeth, he said good night to his brothers as he turned out the light and drifted off to sleep. While he slept, Vic Frohmeyer sent Wade Motch up to Nathan’s room to corrupt his dreams, which he did.

Nathan began to toss and turn as he began to have a nightmare, in his nightmare, he and his brothers were dealing with a dark presence that was trying to possess their friend the Were-Aykroyd. ‘No, don’t harm our brother.’ Ellis Fielding shouted. ‘Yes, Dan’s our beloved brother, and if you even think about harming him yet alone corrupting him, we are going to teach you a lesson you won’t forget.’ Ray Stantz pulled out his proton pack and began to fire at the demonic presence, the entity laughed evilly, as he floated over to Dan, the good-natured heroic Were-Aykroyd.

‘Don’t you dare, don’t you dare do this to me.’ Dan retorted, using his agility to dodge the dark energy bolts coming from the entity’s hands. ‘Oh but I must, I must use my powers to take over you.’ Mike Webber charged towards the evil entity and tried to prevent the entity from coming near his brother, using an exorcism spell to keep him from harming the others, of course all this did was provoke the entity further as he used his powers to keep the brothers in place, he hovered over Dan and then without hesitation, took on a misty form and entered the Were-Aykroyd’s body, possessing him in the process.

‘Aaaaah! Get out of me right now!’ ‘I’m going to be looking forward to using you.’ ‘No, no, don’t do this.’ ‘You can do this, you can fight his influence!’ Clifford Skridlow exclaimed. Dan convulsed and felt like he was going to be sick as the demonic entity had taken control of his body, his whole body convulsed and contorted.

‘Get Mel and Matthias, I need them to help me.’ ‘Right on it.’ Clifford and Elwood called up Mel and Matthias/That Werebelushi In The Shades.

Matthias and Mel came to the rescue as soon as they saw Dan was in trouble…’We’ve got to get that evil entity out of Dan before he corrupts him.’ ‘Thank goodness you two are here, would you please help me? Help me. I don’t want him to take over me.’ ‘Got it.’ The koala-girl used a power similar to Vyond logic to prevent the Were-Aykroyd from being possessed but her magic didn’t seem to be as effective.

Dan convulsed…’I don’t want to be evil like those Aykroydastians, I want to remain nice and good, i'm the hero not the villain. Please help.’ He convulsed and broke down in tears as he painfully transformed into an evil version of himself as the demonic entity possessed his body, making him a ‘Dark Were-Aykroyd’. ‘Eeek! Dan, is that you?’ ‘Dan isn’t here anymore, at least as the goodie two shoes he used to be, now he’s me and he’s bad and he likes it.’

“Our brother would never like being evil.”

“That’s right.”

The dark version of Dan floated over the group of Aykroyd characters and attempted to attack them, but Grocer dove in the way and protected his sibling. ‘I won’t let you do this to my brother, he’s not just a were-aykroyd, he’s our sibling, and he’s loyal to us, he won’t bend to your will.’ ‘Oh but he will. And I want him to turn Nathan for me.’ ‘Nathan will turn Aykroydian whenever he wants, and he won’t do it because you’ve told him to.’

“We’ll just see about that.”

Mel protested against this as she went out of her way to defend her friend, hulking out and roaring as she did so…’You make me so mad when you try to corrupt my friends like that, you are a sick disgusting monster, I hate you, and all you stand for! Mel doesn’t like it when you do that, it makes me want to smash you!’ She picked up a table and threw it at the demon possessed Dan, but the dark Were-Aykroyd chuckled with a smirk on his face. ‘You and that Werebelushi would make great Were-Aykroyds. I cannot wait to turn you two.’

“YOU…LEAVE MY FRIENDS OUT OF THIS, LEAVE THEM ALONE!’ Nathan shouted, his eyes glowing as he concentrated some of his Were-Aykroyd powers. It was clear that he didn’t want his normally good-hearted Were-Aykroyd to harm his friends. ‘You’re so loyal to your friends, I have been denied a chance to take control for so long and your friends are about to be part of the best show ever. Think about it Nathan, wouldn’t it be fun to turn them and watch them become like us?’ ‘No it wouldn't, Dan..whatever has gotten into you, should be let right the hell out right now. Evil spirit, whatever you are, get out of my Aykroydian alter-ego’s body or i’ll use my own were-aykroyd powers on you.’

Nathan tried to plead with the corrupted version of his friend but when that didn’t work, he decided to fight him, by turning into his Were-Aykroyd form in a way similar to when Tommy wolfed out on Big Wolf On Campus. ‘If you want Dan, evil spirit, you are going to get through me first and I warn you, I am much tougher than the average Were-Aykroyd tends to be.’

He leapt into the air, using his enhanced agility to dodge the attacks of Possessed/Dark Dan, if he couldn’t get through to his alter-ego, the best he could do was fight him. Which he did, he fought him with all his might and his powers. His Aykroydian brothers cheered him on and hguged him after he had taken down Dan in his possessed state. ‘Sorry that I had to do this to you, I mean me, I mean myself..but that entity took control of you and I had no other choice.’

Mike Webber performed an exorcism spell to try and get the demonic entity out of Dan’s body, the evil version of Dan chuckled as he thought of this was amusing. Luckily it didn’t take long for the demonic entity to exit Dan’s body and for Dan to return to his normal adorkable self. ‘Boys, i’m back!’ ‘Hurray! We did it.’ ‘Indeed we did. To paraphrase my fellow ghostbuster Peter Venkman, we came, we saw, we kicked his ass!’ ‘We did it.’

All of the Aykroydantiums cheered…and that nightmare was over, it was now a much nicer dream. Nathan awoke feeling much better than he did when he had the nightmare,but then he realized that it wasn’t done yet, as another nightmare was about to happen. In this new nightmare, Nathan was with Dan, his Were-Aykroyd alter-ego. His Aykroydian alter-ego was keeping watch for the night and checking up on him, when he sensed something odd in the air, he could hear the distant sound of sinister laughing as the evil/possessed version of himself materialized. ‘You? But I thought we defeated you, and got rid of you.’ ‘You think you can get rid of me? Ha, you cannot get rid of me, you never will be able to. I am you, I always will be you.’ ‘No you won’t, i’m good and you’re evil, I will never become like you.’

The evil version of Dan chuckled as he levitated around his counterpart, he thought that it was noble for his counterpart to be on the side of good but he thought it would be way more fun to manipulate him and control him, so he dove into Dan’s body, and Dan doubled over as he convulsed, shifting into his evil counterpart’s form. ‘Dan, are you okay?’ ‘I am more than alright, Nathan. Now, how about you come here? You want to be a Were-Aykroyd, don’t you? Let me help you.’

Nathan backed away, feeling afraid…’Dan, you look different, you sound different, you’re not the same adorable were-aykroyd you usually are, you have an evil aura.’ ‘But I feel so good, and you will too. If you just let me touch you.’ ‘No, don’t, don’t…’

He attempted to make a run for it and attempted to fight off the corrupted version of Dan, only for the corrupted version of Dan to touch him..causing Nathan to feel a surge of pain going through his body. ‘Owwww, owww…what’s happening? What’s going to happen to me?’ You are going to become the Were-Aykroyd I always know you’ve wanted to be.’ ‘I already am the best Were-Aykroyd I can be.’ ‘Oh but I can make you like Dan Aykroyd himself and I know how, just trust me.’

Nathan refused to listen to the evil Were-Aykroyd that was trying to manipulate him, he covered his ears and tried to think pleasant thoughts, only to feel a surge of pain jolting through his body as he began to feel like he was burning up…’Jesus christ! Aaaaaah! I’m burning up!’, there was a loud cracking and crunching sensation as his hand slowly began to enlarge and grow, the skin on his hands was maturing as well and brown hairs slowly grew on his hands.

“My hands, no…no…please, it hurts.”

“But it feels to transform doesn’t it? You’ve always wanted this, haven’t you, Dan?”

‘My name isn’t Dan, I am Nathan Forester, I am not Dan Aykroyd.’ ‘Oh but you will, you are a Were-Aykroyd, and you will become Dan Aykroyd and love it.’ ‘No I won’t..aaaaah!’ Nathan groaned as the pain surged through his body, he attempted to try and escape from the apartment, attempting to keep the transformation at bay.

‘Oh but you will, don’t think you can escape me, I am you, you are me.’ ‘No i’m not.’ ‘Oh yes you are, just look at you, you are changing, you’re becoming like me.’ Nathan objected to the very motion of becoming like this evil version of his Aykroydian alter-ego, he didn’t write the Were-Aykroyd stories to be like this, in his Were-Aykroyd stories the Were-Aykroyd was always good and wouldn’t harm anyone yet alone his friends. He wrote the Were-Aykroyd character to be charming and nice, not this malevolent monster. ‘I don’t want this, I don’t want to be like you, I just want to be a good were-aykroyd who fights villains, not to be a villain myself.’

“Oh but I am no villain, I am helping you.”

“Helping me? How is this helping? This is horrifying.”

‘Horrifying? I think you mean horrifying-ly good, because I am helping you unlock the you that is your true you, you act like you are anything but an Aykroyd, but you always will be one.’ ‘I may be a Were-Aykroyd but I will never be like you.’ ‘Oh but you are, just look at you, you’re going to become just like me and you will love it.’ ‘Nooo, noo, nooo.’ He groaned in pain as he pulled back his sleeve, just in time to see brown hair slowly growing on his arms which were broadening and growing with a sickening crunching sound.

“Dan, please don’t do this. The Were-Aykroyd I wrote wouldn’t do this.”

“But I am so much better than that, you wrote me to be perfect.”

‘But you’re evil, not what I imagined you to be.’ ‘Now now, don’t be like that.’ Nathan couldn’t believe what was happening, normally he would be in control of his Were-Aykroyd side and he could morph whenever he wanted but Dan had other plans for him, plans to warp him into the perfect Were-Aykroyd. Nathan’s torso and chest begin to broaden and grow, pushing against his shirt which was tightening and making it difficult for him.

“Dan, stop this, this isn’t you.”

“Oh but it is, and it will be you too.”

He felt sick, he felt like he was going to throw up and like he had eaten something bad, as his stomach began to growl and gurgle, as a hunger built up from within, he panicked, attempting to suppress the hunger but Dan’s hunger and presence were becoming more known, becoming one with his own one. ‘No, no…I must suppress it. I cannot become like you, this isn’t supposed to happen.’

Rushing into the kitchen of his apartment he went to grab something to eat, hoping anything would satiate the hunger of this Aykroydian monster that was forming within. Nathan’s shirt was getting increasingly tighter as he began to pull it off and attempted to tear it off, panting and groaning as a few buttons popped off it and flew off. ‘'I gotta get it off, gotta get it off..must stop the transformation, gotta get it off.’

“'I have your arm hair now, and your hands, and your skin.”

“Oh yes, you have them alright, and look at you.”

“This isn’t me, I have to get it off.”

He began to rip off parts of his shirt only for the rest to start ripping away to reveal his growing chest and torso, which were broadening and growing the same brown hairs on them, his stomach growling as it enlarged and developed brown hairs on it, he groaned, the pain was becoming unbearable and he desperately hoped this would just be a nightmare. He struggled to get the shirt off and he fell down onto his back, moaning in agony. ‘You won’t be needing that anymore. Now that I have your form, you have no idea how long I have always wanted to have control of your form like this.’ ‘No you haven’t, for the most part you always have to wait until nightfall to emerge, that is how it goes and how I wrote it to be. You are a Were-Aykroyd, and like me, you have to wait until nightfall.’

The hunger was starting to get to Nathan…’I must resist this, I am not you, I never will.’, he attempted to get up, which he did, but he felt disorientated…’Dan, please stop this, I feel disorientated, I feel like the room is shrinking.’ ‘You’re going to grow my friend, you’re going to grow into a big sexy Were-Aykroyd. That's why you feel disoriented. My hunger for food and everything else you have is your hunger now. You want to eat. You want to feed the ever-growing and ever-expanding me, do it Nathan. This were-aykroyd is hungry and he wants food to grow his power to even greater heights. That's the feeling you're having.’ ‘Dan, this is torture, please stop this.’ ‘Torture? Ha, this is fun.’

‘No no no…agh, it hurts me. Have you no idea how awful this is? I just want to be normal, to escape from your insidious grasp, but you're always there, mocking me, taunting me, you’re not the Dan I wrote about, you’re not the Dan I love, you are this twisted psychopathic version of him that wants to control me.’ ‘You are normal, Nathan. You are becoming what you must be. There is no longer a Nathan, he is dead. Accept your were-aykroyd transformation, accept your destiny. Why deny this, why deny your destiny? Give in.’ ‘Why would I want to do that? This isn’t my destiny, my destiny isn’t to become this monster.’ ‘Don't fight it, Nathan. We are almost close to achieving my goal of making you mine forever, almost there. Just a bit more and you will be Dan Aykroyd, and be a Were-Aykroyd forever. It's too late, to go back now. Please make this easy, Nathan, don't make this painful for yourself. Just give into it now, accept your destiny.’ ‘This isn’t my destiny.’ ‘Please stop this.’

‘I wrote the transformation to be shocking yet oddly soothing, yes I did write it to be entrancing half-way through the process but only because I start slipping in and out of trance. Yes, the transformation does become entrancing halfway through the process. I felt it myself as I was transforming you. It is why I will make this as easy as possible, why I will make this as painless as I can. We are almost at the halfway point, Nathan, just a little more. Don't fight it, give in now.’ ‘This isn’t how it is supposed to go, stop trying to control me, this isn’t nice, this isn’t you.’

“Oh but it is, and it is you as well…Dan.”

“My name isn’t Dan Aykroyd, it’s Nathan, Nathan.”

“You look like Dan to me, look at you.”

‘Why are you doing this to me, Dan? Please end this, please. This can’t be real, this cannot be happening.’ ‘It is happening, Nathan. You cannot avoid this anymore. Your transformation is progressing, it is happening, you know it. Embrace it now.’ ‘I will never embrace the changes you are forcing on me, I will never be like you. I don’t want to turn out the way you have.’ ‘And yet you're changing, Nathan. You're getting closer to me. You might not want to accept it, but it's true and you know it. You're becoming me, you're becoming Dan, and you're filling with me. You're growing in size as we speak, and I'm filling your mind with my thoughts and desires. Accept it, Nathan. Your body is becoming just like me now, becoming Dan. Matthias will be just like us. There's no one to fight us, no one to save you and Matthias from this fate.’

Nathan shook his head and objected to the Were-Aykroyd’s words. ‘No, he won’t, Matthias is my friend, and once he finds out what you have been doing to me he will unleash his John Goodman style fury on you and will kick your ass.’ ‘Oh but he’s no match for me.’ ‘He’s superhumanly strong and gets even stronger when he’s mad, you wouldn’t want to pick a fight with him and if you ever go so far as to hurt him I am breaking every part of your body.’ ‘Well then…I might just have to turn him.’ ‘I won't let you get him or turn him. You know how he feels about were-aykroyds, he already has one for a roommate who is very dubious, he doesn't need to experience the horrors of one.’ ‘Oh, but he will, Nathan. Once you, Nathan, turn into Dan, you'll have no issue convincing Matthias that it's okay to be with us, with the were-aykroyds. After all, Nathan, what are friends for if we can't fight your foes? Matthias will change his mind very quickly. And he'll be just like you, just like Dan. He'll be stronger than ever. Do you know what Matthias would do with just a small amount of your new power, Nathan? Do you know? He'd be unstoppable.’ ‘Yeah but the name of his show is That Werebelushi In The Shades, the title wouldn't make sense anymore if he wasn't welll…a Belushi-esque monster.’ ‘And yet you forget, Nathan, you forget…Once you turn into Dan, I take control of you. Once you're filled with me, you'll be able to convince Matthias of anything. That title will change, and he'll be happy as a were-aykroyd. The title shall be altered, and it shall be perfect that way. Don't deny what is meant to be, Nathan.’

‘He was born a Werebelushi and he is going to stay as one. You cannot change him other-wise. Besides, you cannot make me do everything as you. You cannot make me be like you, I refuse to turn out like you.’ ‘Don't you understand yet, Nathan? You must do it. I'm not asking you, Dan, I'm ordering you. The transformation will be complete soon, and you will see how right I am. Your friend Matthias will change, and he'll be Dan, just like you. No matter how much you try to fight it, it is inevitable. You are already Dan, and Matthias will be too. The title will be changed, and the name of the show will be perfected. Don't fight me anymore, don't fight your destiny.’ ‘'Dan, this isn't exactly playing fair. Besides, we can't all be Dan. That's you, and to a lesser extent, sort of me but it isn't me.' ‘It is fair, and you are Dan. You're becoming more like me, more like Dan. And you're being filled with me. It is meant to be this way. And with you, Matthias, soon enough there will be another Dan here, another true Dan. And even more will follow, spreading and filling everyone with the power of Dan. We were meant to be many. Don't fight it, Dan, accept what is destined to be.’

“No, it’’s not, I was not made for this, you cannot make me like this. You cannot make me assimilate others into being Aykroydian.”

“And why not, my friend?”

‘It is against what I stand for.’ ‘You will stand for something completely different when I am done with you, now let’s just relax, and enjoy your change, Dan.’ ‘This isn’t you, Dan, you’re supposed to be a good were-aykroyd and now this demonic entity has taken control of you and made you evil, you are corrupting me like this and I don’t like it.’ ‘Oh but you obviously do like it and you are destined for this, to be my good Were-Aykroyd, to serve me.’ ‘Not if Mel has anything to say about it, that koala-woman can kick some serious monster butt. And since you're going to be a full blown villain as opposed to me..’ ‘This isn't about the koala-woman Mel, Dan. It's about you and Matthias, your future, the future of our entire planet. Even Mel herself could be transformed with the power of Dan if we so wish. And we do wish to transform her, do we not? Do you and I not want to see this world taken over by Dan and filled with true were-aykroyds? It is how it is meant to be. Our true nature. Don't fight it, Dan, don't fight what you and I were meant to become. This is our destiny.’ ‘Leave so much as a scratch on my friends and you'll find that there is one thing a were-aykroyd like you cannot do.’ ‘"Oh, and what is that? What is it that I cannot do? If you're speaking of Mel, I assure you she could become a were-aykroyd too. Would you enjoy seeing that happen, Dan? Would you enjoy seeing your friend be with us? Would you enjoy seeing her embrace her destiny, to become one with us? With me? There is no fighting against what you've become, what this world was meant to be like. Don't deny it. Don't deny your true nature, Dan.’ ‘She's already turning into different species and she is my friend, she is a shapeshifter with a condition.’ ‘So, she's already becoming so many other creatures? Why would she want to stay human, when being an were-aykroyd could bring so much happiness to this world? I am the key to her happiness. Don't deny her of it. You must share the gift with her, let her become Dan, let her join us with all of our friends. The world needs to be changed, to be truly perfect, to be filled with us. Don't deny her this, and don't deny it for yourself too. Join us, Dan. Join the were-aykroyd legion.’ ‘'I don't want this and I am not Dan Aykroyd, I love him and always will but never will be him mentally. It's not how turning were-aykroyd works.’

‘There is no turning back, Dan. You don't have a choice anymore. You've changed too much now. Just give up and give in to your true nature. Accept who you are meant to be, Dan. You are an were-aykroyd. You are meant to transform others, including your friends. Including Matthias, including Mel the shapeshifter. Don't you wish to see your world become a perfect place? Don't you want everything to be the way you always wanted? It is possible, it is within your reach. Give in, Dan, and let everything be completed.’ Nathan tried to ignore the evil Were-Aykroyd’s words, he tried to suppress them but the words grew stronger and echoed into his mind. ‘No it’s not my destiny, stop this. You are normally very capable of being nice but now you’re evil, can’t be nice for even a minute, and are giving me my worst nightmare.’

“A nightmare? Oh this is no nightmare.”

‘Dan, this isn’t and never will be you. You weren’t made to assimilate and corrupt innocent people yet alone me and my friends, snap out of it.’ ‘Oh but I am and you are too, Dan, Danny Aykroyd, is that who you are? Yes, it is.’ ‘This is a nightmare, it cannot be happening.’ ‘Yes, it is happening now. The transformation won't stop once it hits the halfway point. You must realize this by now. All you need to do is give into it. Let it happen to you. Let yourself change into the true form you know yourself to be now. It is your destiny, Nathan. There is no going back anymore, you will always be a Were-Aykroyd.’ ‘True, but I will never be like you.’

“But I think you will be, look at you.”

“I know, I don't want to give in.”

‘Oh but you should, just look at you…isn’t it fun to become a were-aykroyd like me? You’re already coming along so well.’ ‘No, i' m not. You are not the were-aykroyd I imagined..I didn’t write you to be like this.’ ‘But, Dan, I am an were-aykroyd. You created me as one. You made me as a were-aykroyd. And don't you want to accept the transformation? Don't you want to be this amazing new being? Just give yourself over to me, Dan, and let me fully fill you. You can transform Matthias too, and he'll be just like us. And then Mel can become Dan too. And we can all be happy together. The world is within your grasp.’ ‘We cannot all be Aykroyds, I won't let you corrupt my friends. Brainwashing isn't nice.’ ‘But this isn't a normal brainwashing, this is your true destiny calling to you, Dan! Don't deny it! Don't deny us! We all can be Dan, we all can be happy and strong. Even Mel, and she will be even more powerful. You can transform them all, Dan, and they will be filled with you and with power. Don't fight it. Don't fight what is meant to be. I am your destiny. I am your one and only true purpose. Accept it. Become me. Become Dan Aykroyd.’

“No, I refuse to do that.”

Nathan groaned as he looked down at his stomach which was broadening and gaining weight, developing hair on on it as he instinctively started to stroke it, he wanted to fight his urges but he couldn't as he found himself becoming entranced, enjoying the change. But he then snapped out of it. ‘What was I doing? Why did I act like I enjoyed that?’ ‘You felt it, didn't you, Dan? You felt the transformation. You felt the change within you. You liked it, didn't you? You wanted this, you asked for it. Accept the were-aykroyd inside you. Embrace who you are meant to be.’ ‘No, you were messing with my head and making me think that I like it, stop it.’

It was that at this point Nathan was mad at Dan and he charged at him with superhuman strength, knocking him down. ‘You made me do this. You are in so much trouble.’ ‘Hehe, trouble? Me, in trouble? Now that's a funny joke! Now, come on, Dan. Don't fight your fate anymore. Don't fight what you always wanted to be. Why do you think you made me an were-aykroyd like you? It's because you are one! You can't deny it forever, Dan. This is inevitable, this is our destiny. Don't fight me anymore. Don't fight nature. And don't fight Mel, and Matthias. They'll be Dan's too one day. Give in.’

‘I wasn't one before, I only wrote about it, it's a story..stop trying to believe it's real. It never was.’ ‘Now look at who's talking, Dan. We're making progress! You're calling me a monster, and that means you understand the truth. You understand that you are changing, you know you are becoming more powerful. You know why we are doing this. You know what we must do. Don't deny your destiny, Dan. Don't deny your true nature. You're becoming who you always wanted to be. Now give in. Let the transformation take place. Let us transform Matthias too and then Mel when she comes for you. It is inevitable.’ ‘I don't want my friends to know what I am.’ ‘You cannot hide something like this. They must know. Why are you so hesitant, Dan? Is it because you know they will understand that this is meant to happen? Or is it because you know in your heart of hearts that we are right, that this is meant to be? This is a good thing. It is better for you, and better for all of us too. Don't deny us, Dan. Let us change the world for the better.’

“Please stop this, this isn't not how you're supposed to be.”

To say Nathan was having a difficult time with his Were-Aykroyd transformation would be underselling it, it hurt him to have to experience this process, true normally he would be able to turn into Dan whenever he wanted and painlessly but in this scenario, he wasn’t, he panicked as he began to make a run for it and tried to head for the door only to be grabbed by Dan. ‘But you already know that this is meant to be, Dan. This is the way things have to be. You must know it, you must have known it since you wrote about it. And it is our destiny, our purpose in this world. We were meant to be were-aykroyds, and we shall be. Don't deny it anymore, Dan. Let's change the world.’

‘Let go of me, Dan. Whatever has gotten inside you is making you act like an evil version of yourself. I told you, I can choose to keep my were-aykroydism a secret as long as I want to and as long as i'm around during the day you cannot do anything about it, this was never destiny, this was you taking something i've wanted and twisting it.’ ‘I am fulfilling your wish, I am the embodiment of what you've made. You created me to be this. You knew what the fate of the world was supposed to be, and you made me that way. Why would you try to fight it? Why would you try to deny me…deny our destiny? The transformation will be complete soon. It'll be good for all of us. Why are you fighting me so much? What do you stand to gain?’ ‘Because I don't want to be a full blown maniacal Were-Aykroyd, I don't want to lose my mind. Most of the time when I write a transformation, the victims keep their memories.’

Dan chuckled evilly to himself, it was shown that this version of the were-aykroyd clearly was enjoying the process. ‘But you know deep within yourself, you will become me, a full Were-Aykroyd. And you know what, Dan? It's alright. It'll be alright. Don't you want to feel the incredible power? Don't you want to become what you were born to be? Don't you want to feel your true nature, to embrace it and to use it? It is our destiny, Dan. It feels good to be me. Don't fight it. Just. Give in.’

“I was never born for this and you cannot make me change that.”

‘Oh, but you are, Dan. You were born to do this, to become me. And you will, you can feel it inside you, you can feel the transformation happening. Embrace it, this is a good thing, you'll know it. You know that with my power you can make the world perfect. You'll know it once we transform everyone. We'll be happy. Don't you want us to be happy? Don't you want this transformation for all those who need it? You do, I know you do.’ ‘Dan, don’t do this, this is and never will be you. The demonic entity has taken over your body and I know you’re still in there.’ ‘'Everyone? No, you can't. There are people out there that probably won't like being transformed, especially without consent. And as alluring with your hypnosis and your powers doesn't mean they'll want you yet alone be you.’ ‘But who's to say my power wouldn't be able to help them, Dan? I'll make them want to become something greater, something more perfect.’ ‘This isn’t you speaking, this is the evil version of you speaking to me, please stop this, and what do you think you will get from this, and nothing…nothing good will come of this.’

‘And they will be happy, don't you understand? Everyone will be happy. We'll make everyone see. We'll show them the path to perfection. And if they won't accept it, we'll make them accept. No one will be a human if we have our say. They'll all become as us. Is that so bad, Dan? What is so wrong about everyone being truly happy and becoming what they were meant to be?’ ‘You and I have the same powers and same weaknesses. I'm a fledgeling Were-Aykroyd who has only been one for a few years, at least since 2020 but has never actually said it.’ ‘So you already understand, then. We are the same, Dan. We share this great power together. And it is our destiny to use that power to transform this world, to make it how we know it should be. Think about it, think of how much better our world would be if everyone were as us. Don't you see the potential? You always knew it, Dan, and only I can help this world reach it's highest potential. Don't deny me, Dan. You know what's right.’

“And this is not right, it never will be right, what you are doing isn’t right.”

“This ends now, and so do you.”

Oh and how do you think you can end me?”

‘I can rewrite you, make you not like this, I can make you better, we don't have to end it like this.’ Nathan pulled out his phone and started to call Mel and Matthias for help, but the evil version of Dan mocked him. ‘Call for help all you like Nathan, but I am the only one who can help you, let me help you, give in, be the Were-Aykroyd you know you are.’

Nathan was definitely more than a little pissed off and he was serious when he said that he could rewrite the Were-Aykroyd’s story, making him back to how he normally was. ‘What? No. You wouldn't do that, Dan. That would violate all the rules. And besides, how would that benefit us? Don't you want to bring me into the new world, to give me a chance? We can change everything. It would be cruel of you to change me now, Dan. Don't you know how much I can benefit this world with my powers? Don't stop me now, Dan. I'm what will save this world from mediocrity, from being just another insignificant planet in the sea. Give in and let me help you, Dan. Let me help us.’

“You're going to have to behave yourself from now on. Because I wrote you, I am your creator, and I am still the one who has a higher morality than you will ever have, what has gotten into your body is making you act like this and it’s not how a Were-Aykroyd should act.”

‘Morality? Don't you understand what we must do, Dan? Is it not about what we want? We can change this world, transform everyone into their true selves. That is what we must do, why deny the truth? And you're saying you would rather deny our destiny than give in? You can't go back to being a human. You aren't one anymore. And you can't take that from everyone, from me. I am the embodiment of perfection, the final goal of your creation. Let me help you, Dan. Don't deny it.’ ‘ ‘Not everyone's true self is an aykroyd.’ ‘It will be if I have my say, Dan. I want this to be the world we know it should have been. The world of the aykroyds. Why do you want to deny this? Can't you see how much better it will be? Is it really about morals? Do you not believe that this planet and it's people deserve to be as us? Don’t deny it, Nathan, don’t you want this?’ ‘I am not denying, I am suppressing the changes, I am trying to get you to snap out of it, I am not Dan Aykroyd, I am Nathan. I am Nathan.’

“Not for long you won’t be.”

The transforming monsterologist was determined to win against the corrupted Were-Aykroyd, he groaned as he kicked off his shoes, his night-socks were slowly tightening as his feet enlarged from within them, they began to strain and tear apart as his feet continued to enlarge before ripping open with a ‘shrippp’ to reveal his larger feet, which looked like Dan’s. ‘This is why I hate the transformation you made me undergo last time this happened, turning into a Were-Aykroyd is difficult, not only is turning painful, but also the clothing bills I will have to end up paying everytime my shirt and shoes get torn apart, you are a monster, that’s what you are.’ ‘But a monster that is helping you…that’s what I am doing.’

Nathan groaned as he felt a tingling sensation in his feet, two of the toes on each foot stuck together at the knuckle giving him the appearance of webbed toes. ‘Oh great now I have your freaky frog-like toes.’ ‘No, you have my Were-Aykroyd toes. Dan, you are becoming a part of me. And that is good, you know this, you know it needs to be. These toes, these feet, they belong to you, they are a part of you. You will love them, Dan.’

The transformation into a Were-Aykroyd was normally so painless for him and not so traumatic, normally when he just Aykroyded out it was because he could do it at will sometimes and it was painless, he just morphed into Dan and kept his thoughts and memories, but not in this case. He groaned as his legs began to go in the same way as his arms, broadening and growing and making his jeans feel a bit snug. ‘Ugh…this hurts, please stop this, this isn’t how i’m supposed to change.’ ‘That's it, Dan, give into it, your transformation is happening. Just give up, just accept it. You cannot stop it, you cannot avoid it. This is your destiny, Dan, your true form. You are meant to be like this. And soon, you will realize that you are glad to be this way. You cannot run, Dan, you cannot run. You are a were-aykroyd now, you belong like this.’

“No I don’t I don’t want to be a Were-Aykroyd forever.”

“Oh but you are going to be one, and be a sexy one at that.”

‘I can easily turn back to normal normally, and that spell from last time should be able to cure me of Were-Aykroydism and revert me to normal before it’s too late, it worked last time to stop me from morphing again.’ ‘Only because I allowed it to, I wasn’t quite finished with you, but you stopped me from completing the change.’

“Dan, this isn’t you, I keep telling you, you’re possessed, you need to snap out of it.”

Nathan groaned as he saw the back of his jeans tightening as his rear began to plump up, he normally loved this part because he wrote it in his stories to be so pleasant and nice but it was horrifying him this time. ‘Uh oh, not this.’ ‘It's quite alright, Dan, you know it is. Your jeans cannot contain your rear. You would not want them too, anyways, to cover the glorious behind of the were-aykroyd. That would be a travesty. Dan, you will be glad, so happy to have that beautiful, large, were-aykroyd behind.’

Normally this part would have been quite sexy to him and if he was Tina Belcher, he would have loved to see this but this was horrifying, he was turning into a Were-Aykroyd and not in the way he normally did. ‘Why do you have to be so thicc and hairy like this? With your chest and stomach hairs and your arm hairs.’

The evil/corrupted Dan chuckled some more, taunting Nathan over his developing build, taking delight in doing so. ‘Because it is the true you, Dan. I know this. I know you want this. Just accept it, Dan. You want me. You want to be me. You want this body. It is meant to be, and you are meant to be the were-aykroyd, with all of my glorious hair and features. You will love it. Dan, I am becoming you and you are becoming me. We are merging. I am becoming a part of you. And you know that you want this.’ ‘Well it is so so…so, oddly interesting, makes me feel like i'm so…so…sexy, no wait this isn't sexy, this is wrong, this isn't nice, this isn't pleasant.’ ‘Just give in, Dan, give in. You want me. You want to be me. Why fight what you know is coming to you? You know your transformation is happening. You don't want to fight it, you know that. I am becoming your true self, Dan, and you need to accept that. Just become the were-aykroyd, Dan, and you will be happy. You are meant to be me. You know you are.’

Nathan instinctively started to examine himself and he started to fall into a bit of a trance before snapping out of it. ‘No, I musn’t be attracted to this.’ ‘Just accept it, Dan. Give into it. Just… let me guide you. Let me become you.’ ‘Dan, whatever demon has taken over you is controlling you and making you do these things, please stop.’ ‘Dan, you are becoming me. There is no longer any Dan left. You just accept it, and you give into me. I am becoming you, Dan.’

“Don’t call me Dan, I am not Dan Aykroyd, I never will be him, I am not him, stop it.”

“Oh but that is who you are now, my were-aykroyd, you will do as I tell you.”

“I won’t do as you command me to do, I won’t, I won’t.”

Nathan groaned as he heard a series of cracking noises, his body was slowly growing up in height from 5’7 to 5’8. ‘Yes, grow, rise, become more. Become stronger. Soon, you will be as tall as me and your body will reflect this, it's all part of the transformation, Dan, you cannot deny it. You need to accept that you are me, and what you are meant to be. And then you will be happy, being so Aykroydian like me.’ He started to lose a bit of his balance as he shot up an additional height, going from 5’8 to 5’9. ‘Dan, now you feel something else, I want you to embrace and embrace this next part. You see, Dan, I am not just a were-aykroyd, I am also a male. Let me become you in all aspects, don't hold back, don't push back anymore, just accept it. Dan.’ ‘Whatever you’ve got planned for me, I don’t want it.’ ‘Oh, but you do, Dan, you may not think you do, but I can see inside of you. I am a part of you, and you want me inside of you. Don't fight it, Dan, you know you want it. Let me become you completely, let me become inside of you.’

‘Stop calling me Dan. I am not Dan Aykroyd and never will be.”

He tried to make a dash for it and headed for a window in hopes of escaping out of it, only to groan as he shot up in height from 5’9 to 5’10. ’I cannot allow this to happen, and I won't.’ He was determined to not only resist changing further but also to get Dan un-possessed, and he wanted this nightmare to end. There was a cracking sound as his height shot up to 5’11 and then 6’0.

“Dan don't do it, don’t do it, don’t let it end in this way.”

“Oh but i’m not done yet.”

‘If it goes the way I think that it is going to go, forget it.’

He moaned, begging for it all to be a dream as he slow grew in height to 6’1, he was now as a tall as Dan himself. ‘Oh yes, you are coming so well, you’ll be a full Were-Aykroyd in no time and then we can conquer the night together.’ ‘I refuse to join you, you're not the Dan I love, you are evil and manipulative. You cannot control me, this isn’t what you’re supposed to do.’ ‘Oh but I can…you know how that song goes, you can try to resist, you can try to hide from my kiss, but you know that you can’t fight the moonlight. And deep in the dark, you surrender yourself and surrender your heart.’ ‘You keep doing this to me in my dreams, right when i'm about to confess to my friends,bam…I start to change, I think I turned back to normal at that party, it was a trick like you to get me to transform. I got so close to meeting John Candy, one of my heroes but you making me into Dan ruined that, why do you ruin my chances of a dream where I don't turn aykroydian?’

‘Dan, you keep falling for my tricks, but this isn't a dream this time. You need to stop trying to resist it. You want this, Dan, you know you do. You are meant to be what you are meant to be, what you will soon become. Let go of your friends, let go of your normal life. Let go and become the were-aykroyd. Let go of everything, let go of everyone, just accept what you need to accept, what you want to accept. Give in, Dan, it's your destiny, you know it is meant to happen.’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, stop calling me that. You are controlling me and this isn’t nice.’ ‘But what I am doing for you IS nice.’ ‘You tricked me into thinking I was free of you. Only to reveal you wanted me to change, you got me addicted on those games that change others into your species.’

‘And I would do it all over again. This is your destiny, Dan. And you know that it is truly what you want. Inside of you, you feel us merging, Dan. You feel it. You know you have to. The transformation is almost complete. You are almost there, you may resist, you may fight, but we are becoming one, you and I. I am becoming a part of you. And soon, you will be a part of me. You cannot escape it, so why should you try? Just give up, just give up and become what you truly are, Dan.’ Nathan broke down in tears, he hated seeing Dan being like this, being this controlling evil being who only wanted to corrupt him and change him into a Were-Aykroyd, which wasn’t the Were-Aykroyd way at all.

“I don't think I should embrace it.”

‘But you should, Dan. It is your destiny. And it is my true desire, Dan, it is what I wish for you. Think about that, Dan. Don't you want to give in to me? Can't you feel us merging, Dan, we are becoming one in a way we never have before. We are so so close, you cannot resist forever, Dan. One day, we will become one, and then both you and me will become what we truly are meant to be..’ ‘Not like this, you are doing this for the purpose of corrupting me and this isn’t like you.’

Nathan groaned as he tried to suppress the changes, attempting to ignore Dan’s words, he attempted to use his shapeshifting powers to morph back to normal but his DNA was reacting in a way that didn’t sound good. ‘Don't fight, Dan, don't try and push back. Accept what is happening. You cannot fight this, you cannot resist what is happening to you, you cannot escape your destiny. Your DNA is being altered, you cannot stop it, stop trying, stop thinking, stop wanting to resist. Accept. Accept everything that is happening to you, Dan. Accept your destiny. We will become one.’ ‘My DNA is allergic to you that's why, it can't handle the aykroydian genes fusing with it.’

He groaned again as his back and shoulders broadened with a crunch and his neckline altered, Aykroydian DNA entering his system. ‘Dan, there is no allergy, this is just another way of you trying to fight back, to stop the transformation I have over you. Don't fight it, you know you want this. Don't fight back, Dan. Don't do anything. You are just a passenger. We are merging, you and me. And I am becoming a part of you. Just accept it, relax. You will be a part of me, and you know you want this to happen.’ ‘I will never be your were-aykroyd because we all know as a more experienced one i'd be the leader.’

‘There you go, Dan, feel it, feel it merge with you, join you. Feel yourself becoming the were-Aykroydian, feel yourself becoming what you were meant to become. And feel us merge, we shall become one, Dan. We shall become more. You know it is your destiny, you cannot escape.’ ‘I still have half vampire traits and I am not afraid to drain you if you’re not careful. I can still do this to you.’

At this point Nathan was definitely pissed off as he snarled and hissed, his canines extending to resemble fangs as his eyes gave off a supernatural glow, his face contorting into a vampire ‘game face’ resembling a Buffyverse vampire. ‘Dan, don't you dare try and vampire me! This is your destiny, Dan! You are a were-aykroydian! This is your true form! You're a vampire-were-aykroydian, Dan! You know I am right! Accept it, accept who you are really meant to be, you can't go back now! You cannot resist this!’ ‘I am not afraid to drain you, you may be a were-aykroyd but I can still drain you and make YOU mine. Remember i'm the one with the power in this relationship.’

He lunged at Dan and sank his teeth into his neck, biting him in a style akin to a classic vampire, causing Dan to yelp in pain. ‘No, no! Please, please do not turn me into your slave. I beg of you, do not turn me into your slave!’ ‘I am not going to make you my slave, but 'You should have thought of that before you did this on me.’ He morphed back to his current appearance to check his appearance.

Nathan gasped as his hair began to darken and lengthen…’Oh no, it’s not stopping.’ ‘Yes, Dan, we are merging. We are becoming one. You cannot stop it, Dan. You cannot resist it, Dan. The transformation is almost complete, Dan. You can feel it, you know it. We are becoming one, Dan. We will be one. There is no you, Dan, there is only us.’ ‘But remember I did what I had to do to teach you a lesson. You were doing this to me.’

‘Yes, Dan, true, you did, and I learned my lesson. And I am sorry, Dan. I am truly sorry for what I made you go through. But I must be in truth, I still believe it was your true destiny to become a were-Aykroydian. You must admit that, in some ways, this is correct. Your transformation is almost complete, Dan, we are becoming one. Just a few more changes, and you will be my were-Aykroydian. So very close, you and I.’ ‘You keep saying that but we are not, and my name is Nathan, Nathan Forester, not Dan Aykroyd.’

“I refuse to believe you. This isn’t how you normally act.”

He backed away, refusing to believe what Dan was saying, because he was afraid of him and he was afraid of what Dan had become and what he’d become. ‘Dan, do not back away, we are becoming one. It is your destiny, Dan. You have to accept it. Soon I will be in you and you will be in me. You will be my were-Aykroydian. Just let me in, Dan.’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, stop it, stop calling me Dan.’

Nathan groaned as he felt a pulsating sensation in his forehead which was growing and become larger, his eyebrows thickened and arched in the process. ‘Dan, yes, this is what has to happen. This transformation has to happen, and together we will finally become one. I will be in you, and you will be in me. Do not resist, Dan, you know what will happen as these changes continue. It will just result in greater discomfort, Dan, just think about that. Accept this, and we will be one. We will be complete.’ ‘I mustn’t think of this, think of anything else besides this.’

He groaned as he tried to think of anything but the morph but he couldn’t, the pain was too much for him to handle, he wished for this to be over. ‘Dan, you can try all you want, but it won't work. This transformation is still happening, whether you want it to or not. You can do one of two things, Dan. You can accept it, you can give yourself completely to me, you can become my mind, my body, my soul, you can live within me. Or you can fight and try and resist, you will make this transformation even more painful than it already is, but it will still happen. The choice is yours, Dan.’

Nathan didn’t want this to happen, he hated for this to happen, becoming a full Were-Aykroyd in this manner was horrifying. ‘Transformations of this sort aren’t supposed to happen to me, yeah…they are normal if you’re Collin from Changed, but i’m not Collin, I am Nathan and I am not Dan Aykroyd.’ ‘Oh but you are, my lovely Aykroydian.’ He closed his eyes and groaned, hoping that when he opened them the whole nightmare would be over, he opened his eyes, they both widened with one remaining brown and the other turning green giving him hazel heterochromiac eyes.

‘Dan, i’ve got your eyes now.’ ‘Yes! Yes, this is what it must be, Dan. Dan, your transformation is almost complete, and you will become what you were always meant to be. Let the transformation happen. Let yourself merge with me, and you and I will become one person, one soul. Dan, your eyes are beginning to change, let it happen. Let me into your soul, and I will stay there. This is what it must be.’

“I'll only let you in if you promise not to go after anyone I love.”

‘Dan, I can promise you that if you let me in and we become one, I will no longer be able to make you do anything. I cannot force you to become what I want you to be. So yes, I will promise I will not go after those you love if you just let me in, Dan. Let me into your soul and we shall be one.’ Nathan knew that the possessed Were-Aykroyd was lying to him, he wasn’t really promising this, he knew this was one of his tricks to get him to let his guard down.

‘I mustn't think of that scene, that scene where Dan Aykroyd gets his body massaged, I mustn't think of it but I am. I begin to slip into another trance.’ He panted as he tried to resist thinking of the scene in Diamonds (1999) where the grandfather, father and son go into a brothel and where the father played by Dan Aykroyd had his body massaged, but he couldn’t not think about it, that scene…Dan’s hairy chest, and soft squishy body, made him jealous.

His mind started to drift, making him think this was what he wanted, to be a were-aykroyd who likes getting pampered and being massaged, filling him with strange Aykroydian thoughts that he tried to suppress. ‘But his hairy stomach and chest, I love that scene so much, sometimes I get jealous of Dan Aykroyd so much, makes me keep wishing I was him.’ ‘Yes, Dan, now you are starting to understand. I can feel you letting me in, you are beginning to accept me, you begin to accept who we truly are meant to be, to become.’

Nathan snapped out of the trance and retorted…’No, just because Dan Aykroyd has aged to become so good looking and oddly thicc and adorable doesn't mean I can submit to the change and whatever the were-aykroyd is making me think.’ ‘Dan, I am here, in your mind, in your thoughts, and I know your desires are changing, just like I know my thoughts are being changed. You are becoming me, and we have become one, one mind. Dan, there is no escape from this, we both know it. In some ways, what is happening and who we are becoming, is your destiny. Just think about it, Dan. Just let me in, just let it happen. Accept who you are, and let us be the were-Aykroydian that we were meant to be.’

‘I will never be one with you, I never will. Just because you know I watch a lot of his movies doesn't mean I wanted to be him in any of them.’ ‘Dan, you cannot change this, you know that, just as I do. Just as I know that this is what must happen, you know it as well, deep down inside, you know that I am right. This is your destiny. You must become what I am destined to become, it is the fate we share, Dan. You and I are the same, in a way we both always knew we were. All you need to do, is just give in, and accept what is happening. It will be so much better, Dan. It will be so much better this way.’

“I can resist, suppressing the Aykroydian instincts and urges is the best i can do.”

‘Dan, this will only make things worse, so much worse. It will hurt so much more, Dan. Dan, give in, give in to your urge to let go, to give up, to surrender. Surrender to this were-Aykroydian transformation, surrender to me, to us, and we will become the were-Aykroydian destiny calls us to be. I am already in you, Dan. I know everything you feel and think. Your urges, even the deep down ones… they belong to both of us now. Surrender, Dan.’ Nathan attempted to keep his Aykroydian urges at bay, groaning as his nose began to itch.

‘No I must suppress it, I don’t want to surrender.’ He groaned as he felt like he was going to sneeze as his nose broadened, developing down a cleft in the middle. ‘Dan, it must be so difficult, struggling to resist. But you know you can't keep resisting, you know you must let it happen, you know it's what you want. You want to become the were-Aykroydian, you want to be what you were meant to be. Let go, Dan.’ The were-aykroyd teased as he took control of Nathan’s nose. ‘Aaaaah! My nose…i've got your Aykroydian nose, your aykroydian hair, your big plump Aykroydian butt, your Aykroyd skin…i'm some kind of weird Aykroydian mess.’ ‘Yes, Dan, yes! All of those changes are a part of you, you cannot rid yourself of them anymore. You have become what I have become. We are were-Aykroyds, and we share all of these changes we are going through. And you know you wanted these all along. You wanted this big body, the big Aykroydian butt, you know you have always desired it, you cannot deny me, Dan. You cannot deny your destiny.

Nathan groaned as his lips plumped up. ’ ‘Yes, Dan! Yes, our lips, our kissable lips will be so much better than before, so much more kissable. Our face, these features, how we transform, they are all meant to be. You cannot escape what is happening, Dan. Our body, this was meant to be, you always wanted it. Accept it, don't resist, just accept this beauty that you cannot escape. Let it happen, Dan. His features slowly began to warp and contort, shifting to become a bit more Aykroydian. ‘No, noo…nooo…I cannot be.’ ‘Yes, Dan! Yes, you are becoming beautiful, becoming the man you always wanted to be! Accept the changes, accept the transformation, you cannot stop it, Dan, you cannot return to what you were. You are becoming more beautiful, more perfect. You are becoming one of the greatest men the world has seen. The were-aykroydian that you have always wanted to be. Yes, Dan, yes! What a beautiful man we are becoming.’

He groaned as his features plumped up and warped even further, resembling Dan Aykroyd’s own features. ‘But i'm not beautiful, look at me, i'm a freak.’ ‘You are beautiful, Dan, you are absolutely beautiful. It's the best thing that has ever happened to you. The way you are changing into the were-aykroydian, it's perfect, it's what you've always wanted. Look in the mirror, Dan, look at what you're becoming. All your dreams and fantasies are coming true, Dan. Look at what is happening to you, you are becoming the man you always wanted to be. You are truly beautiful, Dan. Accept it, do not be afraid.’

“I just have your appearance, I am not exactly like you.”

‘"No, Dan, no, you are not like me and I am not like you. You are the were-Aykroydian, you are you, but your true body, your physical beauty, it is becoming perfect. We have become something that is perfect. I can feel my changes, I can feel them, and you can feel yours, Dan.’ ‘No, this isn’t right, please fight this Dan, you are not this, you are a loving were-aykroyd.’ ‘You feel how much more perfect you are becoming, don't you, Dan? Don't you agree?’

‘My true body isn't this, that's for sure.’ Nathan retorted, his throat started to feel tight and dry as his voice slowly deepened, shifting and warping. ‘Yes, Dan, you feel it in your voice. That dryness, that hoarseness, that's the transformation doing this to you. But do not resist, Dan, we were meant to experience this, to feel this, this change, our transformation. Accept it. Accept that we are becoming who we were always meant to be.’

“I want you out of me before you take over completely.”

‘"Dan, you know we cannot be separated, you know I will always be a part of you. The transformation has already occurred, the transformation is almost complete. Dan, embrace this, accept the way you are becoming. You will become the perfect man, become the were-Aykroydian you have always wanted to be. Accept it, Dan. Embrace what is happening. I will always be a part of you, Dan.’ The possessed Were-Aykroyd’s words sounded more and more horrifying with each line that was uttered, making Nathan freak out even more, he attempted to think of the reversion spell that he did last time he got stuck in were-aykroyd form. ‘Dan, you will not remember the reversal spell, you cannot remember the reversal spell. Don't you want to become the amazing were-Aykroyd you have always wanted? Don't you feel this transformation is right, it is perfect, it is what needs to be? Dan, embrace it, let me in, let us be one person and one body.’

“You’re messing with my mind, you're not supposed to do that.”

‘Dan, that is part of what is happening to us. A transformation like this is no easy feat, to transform from man to Were-Aykroyd. Dan, I am doing this for us, we are so close, just a few more changes and we will be complete. You know you want this, Dan, you know you do. You wanted this transformation from the start. Accept it, Dan, don't resist this.’ ‘I can if I want to.’ Nathan picked up his phone and frantically sent a help me message to his friends.

‘Dan, no, do not do that. You know your friends cannot do anything to save you, Dan, do not even try. It is too late for you, Dan, it is already complete. Send the message, Dan, but it is no use, they cannot save you from this transformation, from me. They cannot save you from this destiny. You know this is what was meant to be, Dan.’ ‘They can, they'll know that i'm not doomed to be a were-aykroyd forever, they'll turn me back to normal and they'll help me feel better.’

“Now now Dan, don’t try to act like you can win this battle.”

‘Stop calling me that, I keep telling you not to tell call me that I am not Dan Aykroyd, my friends will help me.’ ‘Dan, you know they can't, your transformation is complete, it is a part of you now. There is no returning back to the way you were, and you know it. You have already begun to embrace it, to feel it, and you like it. Don't deny what is happening, don't deny the transformation, Dan. You don't want to deny it, you know it is right, the only right fate.’

Nathan groaned as his voice warped and deepened, becoming Dan Aykroyd’s voice and developing the signature mannerisms. The torture he was in was unbearable, he would have done anything to wake up in his own bed as his normal self, he would have done anything for that, but it seemed like it was getting hard to even think of what it was like before. ‘My name isn't Dan, Daniel Edward Aykroyd is Canadian, he was born in Ottawa, I was born here in Oakendale, USA. I'm a human being, a male at around 5'7 and I am a monsterologist, I'm supposed to study you, not turn into you.’ ‘Dan, your memories are confused, we are now one, we are Daniel Edward Aykroyd, we always were. We are becoming the perfect physical specimen. You must embrace it, you must accept it. But we need no explanation of the transformation, we know it is right. We will become the were-Aykroyd, and we will become all of Dan Aykroyd. Look into the mirror, and you will see who we truly are.’ ‘No no….I cannot be a full Were-Aykroyd, that is not how Were-Aykroydism works, most of my victims keep their minds.’

‘Yes, Dan, now that is the spirit! You speak as a were-Aykroyd, we are becoming something greater, we are becoming what we were always meant to be. Look at us, we are the perfect man, the perfect man for everyone, the perfect man for a were-Aykroydian. Dan, let go of what you must, of your past, of everything you once were. Accept what you must become, for the man you always wanted to be is who you are becoming right now.’ ‘But why can't I just keep mine? Can you even hear me? I told you my name is Dr Nathan Forester, not Daniel Edward Aykroyd.’ ‘Dan, we hear you, we know who you are. But you must understand, you must know, that you must accept this fate. We cannot go back, you know that. Your transformation is complete, and you are becoming Daniel Edward Aykroyd. You are accepting it, you don't fight it anymore. You will be him, Dan, you already are him. Do not speak such treason, Dan. Do not resist, do not deny. Daniel Edward Aykroyd is who you are, just as he is who we are. Accept it, Dan.’

“I’m a monsterologist, i’m supposed to study you, not turn into you.”

‘es, that's what you were, Daniel, you were. But that is no longer the case. Your destiny is no longer as a monsterologist. Your destiny is as Daniel Edward Aykroyd, the world-renowned actor, and now you are beginning to finally accept the fate you were meant to have. And all the powers you gain, all the fame, all the glory, that too is destined for you, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Do not deny your destiny, Dan. Embrace it.’ ‘I refuse to, I am not Dan Aykroyd, I will never be him.’ ‘Oh but you must.’

“As far as I know, this is over, nothing left of me for you to take.”

‘That is your mistake, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. There is much more for me to take, more to add to your transformation. Dan, look in the mirror, look at what you have become. Do you see how much more perfect you are? Do you see how good it feels? I do, Dan, I know that it feels oh so good for you to have become me, to have embraced this transformation. Your transformation is not complete, there is still so much more change to come.’

“I have your appearance and voice….what more do you want?”

‘Your body is not yet perfect, Dan… your hair, your skin, your body, they are all still changing. They are becoming as perfect as I am, because I am the master of this transformation. I will help you, this transformation has made you who you must be, who you always wanted to be. But do you know what the most important change is, Dan? It is your mind. Your mind is finally accepting of what you are becoming, of what you are destined to become.’ ‘No, not mental changes….I cannot do a full mind change.’ ‘Dan, you must, it is a part of your transformation. You are meant to become me, not just in body, but in mind, your thoughts must be mine, our thoughts must become one. You must feel what I feel. You have accepted this, Dan, you cannot deny this, you are meant to become me, your mind, your body, your soul, you want this, you want to become who you were destined to be, Dan.’

“I am against it, I am against it because it's wrong.”

‘Dan, you must accept it. You know it is right, you know I am who you truly are. You know how good this feels for you, how good it feels to be me. You cannot deny it, Dan, your mind is finally beginning to accept, beginning to become mine. My thoughts are yours, your thoughts are mine, we are becoming a singular were-Aykroydian, one mind, one body, together forever.’ ‘My ID and every online profile says I am Nathan and I am not Dan. You don't see Dan's name on any of my profiles, do you? No, you don't. You cannot take my mind.’ ‘Your profiles, your ID, your past, all of what is not Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you must put all that away. Accept the change, embrace it, as you have finally begun to do. You no longer need your old identity. We are a single were-Aykroydian now, we have become one, and we are not going to be apart ever again.’

At this point Nathan had enough, he screamed and began to hit himself a few times, ‘Wake up Nathan, you're dreaming, you're not a were-aykroyd, you're not like this, oh please wake up. Please.’ ‘No, you are not dreaming, you are not waking up, you are accepting your transformation. There is no going back now, not for either of us. We are one were-Aykroydian. That is our fate, that is who we are now. Wake up to your destiny! Embrace your transformation with me, wake up Daniel Edward Aykroyd. You will never leave, Daniel Edward Aykroyd, not as long as I am here.’

“But i’m not Dan Aykroyd I never will be.”

Thinking quickly Nathan decided to knock himself out before Dan could fully take over his mind, he was hoping this would do the trick. He got up afterwards, his head feeling a little bit fuzzy. ‘What's going on?' ‘Nothing is going on, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Nothing is happening except you are finally awakening your true self, awakening Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Let go of your previous memories, they are useless to us. That Nathan Forester no longer exists anymore, he is gone, you, Daniel Edward Aykroyd, are here to replace him.’

“I still have them, right?' I just remember getting a head-ache.”

‘You still have a small part of them, yes. But the transformation is complete for you. You are Daniel Edward Aykroyd now, fully. Your memories of Nathan Forester, even if they still exist, are now useless to you.’ Nathan held his head, he felt confused, he was still Nathan..at least he thought he was, but his mind felt fuzzy, his thoughts seemed to be shifting, becoming like Dan’s, fragment by fragment, and taking over. ‘I only remember the transformation and how it happened.’ ‘You don't need to remember. It has happened, but it doesn't matter now. All that matters is that you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Just focus on that and do not fight it anymore, let go of Nathan Forester.’

Nathan groaned as he held his head, a surge of headaches coming in. ‘Dan! You’re giving me such a headache! I felt like i’m Rita Repulsa!’ ‘Yes, the headaches. They are a welcome indication of you finally becoming me, becoming Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Let it happen, fight no more.’ ‘DAN! This is all your fault, if only you stay put during the day and didn’t let that demon possess you. You are giving me a headache!’ ‘Do not resist, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Do not fight what is right, who you are destined to be. Let go, you cannot fight against your were-Aykroydian destiny. You are becoming perfect, let your transformation complete, don't fight it anymore.’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, my name is Nathan Forester, all of my IDs still show this, my friends will see this, my family will see it. You are in so much trouble, you are giving me such a headache.’

‘Your previous name is no longer relevant. Who you are now is what matters, and it is Daniel Edward Aykroyd. Your friends, your family, they will see you as Dan, as who you truly are now. You will be Dan Aykroyd to them, you can never go back to Nathan Forester. My transformation is complete, you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd forever, the perfect were-Aykroydian, the greatest transformation in human history.’ ‘No, that is not true, I can go back to normal and I can stop you before I go full Were-Aykroyd.’

He attempted to try and find a cure for his condition, only for Dan to laugh maniacally and taunt him. ‘Trying to find a cure, eh? No cure will save you from what I can do to you.’ ‘Just end this torture now, don’t take my mind.’ ‘Now Dan, don’t struggle, you and I both know you want this.’

Nathan groaned as he tried his best to resist, holding his head in anguish as some of Dan Aykroyd’s memories started to get into his mind. ‘I am Dan Aykroyd, I am married to Donna Dixon, I was on SNL during the Seventies. That cannot be right, I don't remember any of this. I don't remember being part of second city, being an SNL cast member during the 70's, I don't remember being married to Donna Dixon at all. Dan, you’re implanting Dan Aykroyd’s memories into my head.’

‘You will very soon. Accept it, embrace it. You have become what you were always destined to be, Daniel Edward Aykroyd. You do not remember it now, but your transformation is nearly complete. Once your mind is fully mine, you will remember who you are, you will remember who you once were, Dan Aykroyd, you will become me. Accept it, this transformation is good for you, it must happen. You want it to happen, you must accept it, you want to forget being Nathan, you will always be Dan Aykroyd.’

It was at this point Nathan was breaking down, crying and screaming, trying to keep himself from losing his mind completely, trying not to think he was Dan Aykroyd, but he just couldn’t, as he groaned and begged for it to end. ‘That cannot be right. I have to fix this.’ ‘You cannot. You will not. Your transformation cannot be reversed. There is no returning to who you once were, Nathan Forester is gone, your life and memories as you once were are gone. There is only one way, and that is to complete your transformation, to embrace it, to become the were-Aykroydian you were ALWAYS meant to be Dan Aykroyd.’

‘I would rather not. Please tell me this is just some sick twilight zone twist and i'm going to be perfectly fine.’ ‘No, this is not a sick twist, no, it is not something you simply wake up from, no, this is reality, this is your new life, your new existence. You are Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you were ALWAYS meant to be Daniel Edward Aykroyd. There is no stopping your transformation now, no going back, no undoing it. You are destined to become one with me, we will become one were-Aykroydian.’ Upon seeing himself in the mirror, Nathan shattered it in a fit of rage and attempted to hide away. ‘No! Do not hide, do not resist! You are meant to accept this, to become this! You cannot stop it now, you are meant to be Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you are meant to be a were-Aykroydian! Stop resisting, you cannot hide forever! Accept it, look in the mirror, you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd!’

“But you made me into this horrible creature, I like Dan but I don't want to be him fully.”

‘You cannot resist it! You are Daniel Edward Aykroyd! You know the truth, you cannot deny it! You enjoy this, you enjoy the power that being Daniel Edward Aykroyd provides you, the transformation makes you stronger than you could ever imagine. Look at yourself, you enjoy this, you love it, the transformation is perfect, it is glorious!’ ‘Yes…yes…I am Dan Aykroyd, I was born in 1952, i'm Canadian, no wait…that's not right. Let go of my mind.’ Nathan freaked out, he wanted desperately to hold onto his memories of being himself.

‘Yes, yes, see? This is who you have become, it is your destiny. Don't fight it, let it happen. You like this transformation, you want to be Dan Aykroyd, you are meant to be him now. Embrace the transformation fully.’ ‘I used to be normal, but i'm not normal anymore, you turned me into a Were-aykroyd, this wasn't how I wanted my curse to be like that. Nooooo, noooo, nooo…’ ‘No turning back, you are Dan Aykroyd, you have to accept it. Why fight me, why fight what is right for you? Let go of those old memories, they are no longer a part of what you are meant to be. Embrace the change, you are Daniel Edward Aykroyd, you must, you will, you are Dan Aykroyd now.’

He cried out in anguish as his normal self’s personality started being overshadowed by that of the ‘Were-Aykroyd’…’Nooo, please, this hurts so much. Please stop this, turn me back to normal.’ His cries only served to weaken him, and he begged and he pleaded. ‘As far as I know you and I are through this has to end.’ ‘Do not resist your destiny, you must embrace this change, you must become a perfect were-Aykroydian. I am your destiny, I am what you always wanted to be. You are meant for this, accept this already, let go of Nathan Forester, and let Dan Aykroyd take over. Let him in, let us in.’

“But you don't even know what the words were, how can you hypnotize me without saying them.”

Nathan attempted to resist a couple of times before going into a trance-like state. ‘Yes, yes…I must be a good were-aykroyd, I must be like this…no, no, he didn't even say the words, i'm not supposed to be enticed into this unless he says the words. What is going on, I cannot think of anything I have done as a human.’ ‘That’s because you don’t, your mind is warping to catch up to the rest of you, and soon you will only think you are Dan Aykroyd.’ ‘But you're not supposed to entrance me like this, you do know that it's not how this works. End this now, or I will have to end it myself’. ‘Maybe I did say them. Maybe I didn't. But that doesn't matter anymore, because Dan Aykroyd is who you ARE. You ARE Dan Aykroyd, there is no more Nathan Forester, stop clinging to that man, he is not you, has me and my transformation shown you anything other than that? Stop resisting, embrace your future. Your transformation is meant to be complete.’

“Not anymore it isn’t, sorry, but i’m out of here.”

‘Oh no you’re not…or should I say, Dan?’ ‘I am not Dan Aykroyd, I never will be, stop doing this to me, you have tortured me enough, I want to wake up from this nightmare.’ ‘Oh yes, you are, you will always be Dan Aykroyd, and you will be mine forever.’ ‘You cannot completely overwrite my memory, I may partially think I am him but not completely, you cannot do that.’ ‘Nathan Forester no longer exists, no longer matters, forget him, forget him and what you used to be, Dan Aykroyd is who you have become, it is who you are meant to be, my Were-Aykroyd.’

‘Y-Yes..I am Dan Aykroyd, no wait, i’m not…i’m Nathan Forester.’ ‘Oh but you are Dan Aykroyd, you always will be, every night, you will become like this, and you will help me, make more Were-Aykroyds like us, spread your perfect Aykroydism to your victims, make them Aykroydian too.

‘"No no…nooonooooooooo!'

Nathan dreaded that this moment would come as he struggled to keep his normal memories of his normal life and his friends, only for Dan Aykroyd’s memories to seep in even further, all of Dan’s memories overtook Nathan’s own and a tiny bit of Nathan stayed on to try and keep them away, but those Aykroydian thoughts and urges entered his mind, making him think that he was Dan. ‘Yes, i’m Dan Aykroyd, I was born in 1952 and I am Canadian, no wait..i’m not, i’m not Canadian, i’m not Dan Aykroyd, I wasn’t born in 1952.’ ‘Oh but you are, you are Dan Aykroyd, you were born in 1952 and you ARE Canadian.’

He tried to ignore those words but they wormed into his mind and he begged for it to end, only for Nathan’s memories to be fully evacuated and replaced with Dan Aykroyd’s own, as his transformation completed. ‘Yes, I understand…I am Dan Aykroyd, i’m a Were-Aykroyd, I live to serve you, I live to transform people into Aykroyds and make them perfect like us.’ ‘Excellent, see…I knew you’d give in eventually.’

The now corrupted Nathan or rather ‘Dan Aykroyd’ was under Dan the possessed Were-Aykroyd’s control, and there was nothing he could do about it because Nathan was no more, only the new Dan Aykroyd, the perfect Were-Aykroyd. It was then a few seconds later Nathan awoke with a loud scream. ‘What’s wrong Nate, buddy?’ Elwood Blues asked him.

‘I had a horrible nightmare in which Dan got possessed by a demon and turned evil and then he made me go full Were-Aykroyd and I lost my mind to him, I wasn’t even myself, my body, my voice, my mind, were all Dan Aykroyd, I was his to command, he corrupted me, he brainwashed me, that wasn’t nice at all.’ Nathan sobbed.

Clifford Skridlow and Ellis Fielding both cuddled him to help him feel better. ‘There there, it’s okay.’ ‘Yeah…it was just a dream, we know Dan would never harm you, or us.’ ‘But who would give me such a horrifying nightmare.’ ‘I think I know who.’

Grocer and Austin Milbarge from Spies Like Us were listening in to a conversation nearby, Vic Frohmeyer and Wade Motch along with undead Elwood were laughing. ‘Our plan worked perfectly.’ ‘Yes, our wicked nightmare spell to traumatize Nathan by giving him a nightmare about his own Were-Aykroyd alter-ego was successful.’ ‘Yes, and having the corrupted Dan fully corrupt him into becoming a full Were-Aykroyd with no way of turning him back was ingenious.’

“Ah ha, those guys did it.”

“I should have known.”

‘Yes, that plan to corrupt Nathan’s mind by corrupting his alter-ego and brainwashing them was very successful.’ ‘Yep, we successfully brainwashed/corrupted Dan and got him to do the same to Nathan too.’ ‘YOU GUYS DID WHAT?’ Mike Webber snapped. ‘Oh shoot, the Aykroydantiums.’

All of Nathan’s Aykroyd character brothers jumped over to teach them a lesson, all of them looked suitably angry. ‘Oooooooooh, ooooh, oooooooh, ohhh.’ ‘You’;ve really done it this time, you sickos.’ ‘Yes, how dare you try to corrupt Nathan in his dreams and brainwash him into forgetting who he is, you know how much he hates mind changes.’ ‘That is it, you lot are in trouble.’

Nathan manifested next to Vic Frohmeyer…’Did you do this to me Frohmeyer?’ ‘Yes..’ ‘That is it, you are grounded until Merry Christmas is once again acceptable to say around the holiday season, not only that but your punishment is to celebrate the holidays with a family that has religious beliefs that are different than yours, and you will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal.’ Elwood Blues decided to have a turn at it. ‘Zombie me, for being apart of this plan, you are grounded until a third Blues Brothers movie is released, and you will be forced to stay in the same prison I stayed at while waiting for my late brother Jake in Blues Brothers 2000, and you will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal as well.’

‘Bob, for also helping with this evil plan, you are grounded until John Landis eventually makes another movie and teaches his son Max to behave properly, while you are grounded you will be made to help clean the apartment, and you too will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal.’ Bob started to cry as he heard this.’Waaaaaaaaaaaaa!’, ‘Oh and don’t you make that motorcar crying sound or i’ll have Mel use magic to make you into one and sell you to Ray Zalinski.’

‘Pa Tex, you are grounded until it becomes illegal for everything in Texas to be giant-sized, until then you will have to watch every single bad AGT/BGT audition that Simon Cowell didn’t like and you will eat lumpy potatoes for every meal.’ ‘And finally, Wade Motch, you are grounded until Donald Trump runs for office again and doesn’t make an idiot out of himself, while you are grounded, you will be made to work for fellow Aykroyd character and president William Hainey and you will eat lumpy potatoes, just like the others.’

The Aykroydastians all broke down in tears as they ran away, and Nathan and his Aykroydian brothers all got back into the apartment and relaxed. ‘Thank you guys.’ ‘No problem, Nathan. Are you feeling better?’ ‘Yes, I am.’ ‘’I just the thing to help get your mind off that nightmare. How about we watch your favorite Dan Aykroyd movie?’ ‘Yes, that sounds like fun and a good way to clear my mind off of that nightmare.’ ‘I have the bluray of Nothing But Trouble, we can all watch it. I know it is your favorite Aykroyd movie, Nate.’

“You are correct, it is my favorite, it is so surreal and funny.”

“It’s settled then, we’ll watch that movie.”

‘And i’ll make the popcorn. Bing bing bing bang popcorn!’ ‘Oh, Grocer!’ They laughed and smiled as they sat down and watched Nothing But Trouble, and enjoyed the movie, watching the movie helped Nathan get over his nightmares that he had, and they all had a lovely time.

And so once again…the day and night are saved, thanks to the Aykroydantiums

[arleniansdoodles]

Seeing as you are the reason i and im sure many others got into sifu i will he holding you accountable by forcing you to give any and all of your thoughts on sifu (specifically the dynamic between Sean, Mc, and Yang) (only if u want tho)

You dont understand i thrive on insane fandom conversations it pains me that there is basically none of that surrounding Sifu

Hahahaa duly noted, anon! If I’m indeed the reason for getting some more people into Sifu, then it’s an honour! XD And no worries at all, I too enjoy the fandom convos and rambling about headcanons; the Sifu fandom’s been pretty lonely in that regard 😅 So I shall proceed to hand over my Sifu headcanons!! Also, there may be some spoilers for my Sifu fic, but it’s mostly just a summary of the backstory stuff loll And this also got pretty long, so I’ve put most of it under a read-more tag 😉

The dynamic between Yang, MC, and Sean is my absolute favourite to think about! Starting with Yang – I headcanon that he was orphaned at a young age after losing his family to illness (which kickstarts his fear of losing loved ones). Sifu finds Yang and takes him in, and raises him (as does MC’s mother, Simou). It’s kinda like a Shang-Chi scenario: Sifu teaches Yang more of the fighting stuff while Simou teaches him the calmer things, like tai chi and qi gong.

I imagine he would’ve met Sean early on, and the two become fast friends in a “we’re both awkward, lonely runts who have trouble making friends” sort of way XD As a child, Sean wanted strength to defeat bullies, which inadvertently led to him defending those who are “weak” (which gets twisted as he gets older, as we see in the game). Sean defends Yang, and Yang looks out for him, and they become an inseparable duo! 

When Yang falls in love and marries his wife, I think Sean would feel kinda jealous because he still struggles with his own love life; but more than that, Yang is his best friend, so he’s worried about them drifting apart. But even bigger is MC being born! Since Yang had a lack of affection/security as a kid (and was later taught by the affectionate Simou), he immediately “clicks” with MC and dives into taking care of her as a big brother figure. To him, the title is more than just being a fellow Kung-Fu student. He wants to be like an actual brother to MC and make sure she never feels abandoned or unloved by anyone. I think, next to Sifu and Simou, he develops the strongest emotional bond with MC out of everyone.

I also headcanon MC’s name is Yin, hence the connection between her and Yang XD But that’s a whole other ramble of headcanons 😆

I should also mention that I imagine Simou (MC's mother) dies when MC is still a baby, which adds to Yang's trauma of losing loved ones to illness. Thus, he's always hypervigilant whenever MC gets sick 😢

Anyways, MC is closest with Yang while growing up, and she’s his favourite student when it comes to Kung-Fu. I think MC would’ve been scared of Sean at first; he doesn’t like kids or hanging around them, but Yang says she can trust Sean. So, in order to push them together, I put MC and Sean through a Big Event that helped shift their impressions of each other, which led to their developing bond 😂 But I think part of what pushes MC to spend more time with Sean is that Yang gets busy with his own family, his wife and new daughter, etc.

With Sean and MC, I’d call it a sunshine-grumpy dynamic? Sean doesn’t like kids, but he does grow to love MC as his sister. With his life being full of chaos, danger, and unstable relationships, she’s the only one with feelings that remain constant. And in MC’s pov, Sean is someone who protects her and keeps her safe no matter how many dangerous situations they might accidentally get into (because Sean’s a fighter in the illegal fight club XD). I think MC also helps Sean feel like he’s still needed, y’know? She depends on him when Yang isn’t around, and he wants to do the right thing, but he feels like he can’t be a good enough brother, so there’s a whole bunch of angst to swim through there 😂

And those are the basics of what I have for Yang, MC, and Sean! I could undoubtedly go into paragraphs upon paragraphs about each of them, and detail all my thoughts about their backstory and how it leads up to / affects their dynamics in the game, but I think I should stop here since this is getting pretty long loll But I’d definitely love to chat about some other headcanons – I got some feels about Sifu, Sean’s father, and Jinfeng, for example 👀 And how MC’s parents meet, and all that XD

Thank you so much for sending me your ask, anon! And if you read this far, thanks again!! 😁 I hope you enjoyed reading my thoughts as much as I enjoyed writing them! 💗💗

[xansmenagerie]

The Catnip Incident

I play in a long-running Monster of the Week tabletop game, and because I like to get a feel for how my characters evolve in downtime after the relatively short IC uptimes (most monsters are dealt with in ~72hrs) I write bits of fic in the interim.

(Because my GM has a sense of humour they often then get incorporated into uptime, but I digress.)

One of my characters, Colin, was a seventeen year old wizard who threw fireballs and worked at a petrol station - which gives you some idea of just how good he was at Life Choices. He picked up an animal transformation spell largely because he was fed up of being repeatedly dropped by all the Neighbourhood Witch's teleporters (yes, we went there).

One of his best friends happened to be an angel called Cassiel - yes, there was (and still is) a certain resemblance to a certain snarky angel from a certain monster-of-the-week tv series.

(The rest of the team mentioned in here include a hyper-intelligent and possibly immortal cat called Kitty, an ex-army fellow wizard called John, and John's extremely bookish half-sister Dana who has a Thing for the angel.)

What was affectionately referred to as The Catnip Incident happened over a year ago in real time; I've done a lot more writing since its first incarnation, and while I loved the premise I was never entirely happy with Version 1. So here you go - two for the price of one, the original and the rewrite.

Oh, and don't feel too sorry for Colin - he technically retired to safety after the Season One finale episode, and then spent so much time scratching at my brain he got himself brought back with Much Drama. Now he's the teleporter dropping everyone...

Version 1

Colin's mood could best be described as 'stoic' as he handed over some of his hard-earned wages for a cute bracelet and a terrible 'Welcome to Shrewton' glitter globe at the town's only tourist tat and New Age shop. Technically both were hush money, after a fashion; the bracelet was for when he explained the events of the afternoon to Macey, in the hope that she wouldn't get too enthusiastic about seeing the effects for herself, and the glitter globe was a "let us never speak of this again" slash apology for Cassiel.

It wasn't like he'd intended for it to happen. The Book had mentioned a time limit on animal transformations before the animal side started to become dominant, with suitable Dire Warnings, and Colin had wanted to test it out. It might have been more sensible to stay in his room for the duration but that would have been boring - and besides, there was only so much trouble he could get into as a cat, right?

He'd realised his error right at the point he caught and ate a mouse. Especially as it hadn't tasted all that bad… Colin had taken that as the signal to get human asap and had started heading home sharpish, taking a direct route across gardens instead of meandering around by the roads. That had been his second mistake. In one of the gardens another cat had been playing with something that had smelled...interesting, and his stupid cat brain had identified it and pounced before Colin had recognised the catnip toy.

Strictly speaking, he couldn't fault Cassiel's response. Colin's one concession to safety had been to ask Cassiel to come and find him if he hadn't checked in past a certain time, and when that time had come and gone Cassiel had indeed done as asked. By this point, according to Cassiel, Colin had been thoroughly out of his mind on catnip, so Cassiel had done the sensible thing and returned Colin to his bedroom before trying to persuade him back to being a human.

Which was why, some time later, when Colin had slowly drifted back into full human consciousness, it had taken him some time to identify where he was and, more importantly, what he was lying on. Cassiel had actually been impressed by just how fast Colin had moved, especially as he'd managed to protectively take the sheet with him. But, as Cassiel had very calmly pointed out while trying to get the feeling back in his legs where someone had fallen asleep on him, Colin had absolutely refused to change back unless Cassiel kept petting his ears, and so…

No, the only person Colin was feeling betrayed by right now was his mother. Because, and he was pretty sure this was in the parental manual somewhere in big letters, the reaction to finding your teenage son mostly naked and blissed out in the lap of a man in a trench coat should not be to sigh, ask if this was a 'magical thing', then drape a sheet over all the bits of said son that needed it and leave quietly. Even if said person was an angel, and even if 'a magical thing' generally was the answer to most of the weirdness in his life right now. He was at least fifty percent sure there was an incriminating photograph somewhere, or at the very least a threat of a story to be told if Colin didn't find time to do his household chores…

And that, in a nutshell, was why bribery was happening. Because there was no way what had happened would ever be communicated on without it being garbled, especially if it was Cassiel doing the telling, and Dana would murder him. And if the cost of not being murdered - and not having any of the other Scoobies making catnip jokes for the rest of Colin's brief life - was a tacky snow globe, some jewellery and doing the washing up without being asked, Colin considered that money and time well spent.

Version 2

Window propped open…check. Door wedged…check. Time check…about 10am. Okay, let's do this.

Colin quickly dashed off a text message to Cass - 'experimenting with shape shifting, come check on me if I don't text again by 4pm' - and stripped down to his boxers, throwing his uncle's leather jacket back on as fast as possible in case a certain angel came to ask questions. He waited five minutes, listening hard in case any member of his family was about to be equally awkward as he bundled his clothes up neatly by his bed.

Satisfied that he was in the clear, Colin took a deep breath; as he exhaled, he reached for the spell woven into the jacket with his mind and twisted. The shift flowed around and through him; the furniture rose up as the jacket melted into his skin and turned to feathers, arms becoming wings, eyes shifting and becoming more keen. He primly stepped out of his underwear, now lying in a heap on the floor, and after a couple of experimental wing pumps took to the air. An easy jink through the open window, a loft out over the garden fence; as soon as he was clear another twist shifted feather to fur and he dropped easily onto four paws.

There we go. Just an ordinary cat out on the prowl. Book said five hours was safe, worth checking it out while nothing's going on.

Sure, he could stay put in his room for all that time. But that was a really boring option, and Shrewton was full of interesting smells and things to poke. It wasn't like he could get into any real trouble if he kept off the roads, right? The only thing he needed to do was avoid Kitty, and that was only because he was pretty sure he was even more gangly as a cat than as a human and they would only laugh at him.

He just had to keep an eye on the time. So he'd just have to keep going past any place with an outdoor clock - like the churches - and make sure to check. Still, that was why he had angelic back-up planned, right?

Colin sauntered off - paws and tail definitely made for a better saunter, Kitty was right about that - to get a cat's eye view of town.

Nearly six hours later, Colin was wondering what all the fuss had been about. Being a cat was pretty sweet, and it hadn't exactly been difficult to keep his human thoughts in charge of his feline instincts. Sure, if anyone asked then "getting scritches" was entirely the cat brain's fault (no wonder Kitty looked blissed out sometimes when they deigned to accept them) but otherwise he'd been easily avoiding eating cat food and the like.

Something rustled in the hedge beside him. Colin flattened himself to the floor, then fluffed out his tail at annoyance at himself for being startled - especially once the tiny black eyes and pink nose of the culprit revealed themselves. 

Colin's tail twitched.

Okay, I might need to actually hunt something in this shape one day. I guess pounce and release is fine? 

He hunkered down properly, trying to judge his timing. Without really being aware of it his breathing eased and his back legs shifted beneath him. When he moved, it was too fast for the mouse and nearly too fast for himself, human mind pulled along for the ride by cat instinct. 

Then he bit the mouse's head off.

By the time Colin started thinking again, there wasn't much left besides a couple of feet and a miscellaneous organ. The human part of him was horrified; the cat part was licking his lips and contemplating those food bowls he'd left alone earlier, the tang of blood filling his nose and mouth. 

Shit shit shit! Abort!

No need to panic, and no need to worry Cass yet either. Message firmly received and all that - he was still largely in control, so if he went home right now and stopped trying to second guess how much cat instinct had snuck in without him noticing he'd be fine and would learn a valuable lesson for the future. 

Colin had wandered far enough that going by the roads would take longer than he was happy with right now, but no one was going to notice a cat taking shortcuts through gardens. He could notice it though: hedges were fine to wriggle through, but each fence jumped eroded a little bit of control as he had to concede judging the jump to instinct, too flustered to human his way over. 

He was only two gardens away when something teased at his nose. There was another- a cat rolling around and playing with something. Colin couldn't help himself getting a closer look, thoughts moving slower than his paws.

Too late, he finally recognised the danger: a fairly fresh catnip toy, the battering it had already taken only enough to release yet more scent.

The cat took over before he could tear himself away, pouncing and nibbling; the fog settled in, and all thoughts of praying for help drifted away…

---

The alarm went off on Cassiel's phone. He'd conscientiously set it in response to Colin's text, even though he didn't really need it and hadn't expected it to be relevant.

Cassiel frowned. The lack of any further contact from Colin was moderately concerning but easily rectified; it took him only a moment to fly from the church to Colin's side, ready to find out what had happened. There was a snag though; he had landed next to Colin, but Colin wasn't immediately in evidence.

"Caaaasssss!" Something warm bumped heavily into his legs; he looked down at the touch and familiar voice - in sound if not in tone - to see a leggy cat now trying to twine unsteadily around his ankles.

"Ah. Hello Colin."

The cat - Colin - tilted his head sideways to look up at him, nearly tripping over his own paws, and blinked slowly. "Hiiii…" His ears perked up. "Y'came! Y'r the best, y'know?"

"Thank you," Cassiel replied gravely. "Are you well?" He felt he should ask, even if the combination of fur and slurring suggested that Colin was not, in fact, well.

Instead of a helpful reply, Colin butted his head against Cassiel's leg with a plaintive mewl of, "Scritches?"

The level of concern was starting to tick up past moderate. It wasn't just that Colin was acting drunk; there was a subtle difference in how, say, Cassiel understood Kitty when they chose to speak feline compared to an ordinary cat, and the way Colin was communicating was closer to the latter.

Cassiel squatted down next to Colin, ignoring the big eyes and hopeful headbutts. "Colin, I need you to focus. You told me to check on you if you hadn't contacted me by a certain time but did not explain why. Can you remember?"

For a moment it looked as though Cassiel might be getting through; Colin paused and sat down, rubbing at an ear with a front paw as though trying to clear his head. Then he bounded to his feet again, all enthusiasm.

"Wanna see how fast I c'n run?" Not waiting for an answer, Colin promptly shot off on a lap of the garden.

Cassiel bit back a sigh and started looking around for anything that might explain Colin's behaviour. There was, incongruously, a stuffed toy banana abandoned on the grass nearby; he stood, stepped closer, and reached out to pick it up.

There was suddenly a Colin attached to his arm, all four sets of claws scrabbling for purchase, gnawing fruitlessly but determinedly on his knuckles.

"Mine!" Colin's growl was unsurprisingly muffled but determined.

"Indeed," Cassiel replied flatly, noting as he did so from his half-crouched position the other much grumpier actual cat skulking under a shrub on the opposite side of the garden.

Given that the behaviour was very un-Colin-like, there was a good chance that the toy was at least partly responsible for Colin's current predicament. However, by clinging to Cassiel's arm Colin had at least made the next obvious step of removing him from the situation relatively straightforward; between one heartbeat and the next, Cassiel flew both of them to Colin's bedroom.

Colin shook his head vigorously then looked around. "Aww…oh hey, my bed!" He bounded up and promptly started kneading the duvet cover with his claws.

If it was a transformation issue then Cassiel supposed the next thing to check would be Colin's book of spells. It seemed unlikely that it would be out in the open, but Cassiel looked around anyway; he closed the window and removed the wedge from under the door as potential hazards but searched to no avail.

Eventually he tried Colin again, for all that Colin was now sprawling on the carpet and apparently trying to itch every section of his spine at once. "Colin. I want to read your Book. Where did you hide it?" He hoped that asking a cat to play fetch wasn't going to lead to a sulk.

Colin seemed to twist his spine through itself in the way that only cats do, bouncing up onto his feet and back onto the bed in one fluid movement with an excited meow of, "Show you!". He plunged his head under the pillow; Cassiel could only assume he'd grabbed the book binding in his teeth from the muffled noises that might have been, "Here!"

Cassiel retrieved the Book from its hiding place; noting the receipt being used as a bookmark he flicked through and, sure enough, it was on the transformation spell.

He read the details.

He looked at the message on his phone.

He looked at the time, now well past the six hour mark.

He looked at the cat that had gone back into full sprawl mode beside him on the bed.

He looked at the soul of the cat, looking far less human-shaped and far more cat-shaped than it really should.

If he had been the sort of person to swear, he would have considered it.

"Colin, this is serious," he said urgently, "You need to change back into a human now before you do something permanent to yourself."

Colin looked back up at him and mewed hopefully, "Scritches?"

"I will make a deal with you," Cassiel replied, doing his best to keep his voice even, "I will provide you with 'scritches' as long as you change back to human as soon as you are sated."

Colin blinked at him slowly, clearly coming to a decision; he walked his front paws up Cassiel's leg, balancing them on Cassiel's hip and butting at his arm when. "Scritches," he declared firmly.

Cassiel considered his options; not knowing how much control Colin normally had in transforming - if this could be considered normal - there was a good chance in their present position they would both end up on the floor if Cassiel was taken by surprise. Carefully he hooked his hands under Colin's front paws and manoeuvred around him, ending up sitting on the edge of the bed with Colin standing on his thighs.

Colin was clearly happy with this arrangement; Cassiel gave up and started scratching him behind the ears as agreed. He was oddly pleased to receive an enthusiastic rumble of purring in return.

When five minutes had passed - and Colin had moved from standing to bonelessly draping his head and chest over Cassiel's thighs - Cassiel gently coughed while still keeping up the scratches. "You did promise you would change back, remember."

Colin blinked sleepily up at him again; there was an odd twisty inside out feeling and a complicated moment, and now the fur under Cassiel's hand was slightly scruffy hair and smooth skin.

Cassiel was about to thank Colin for keeping his side of the bargain when he heard the snore. At roughly the same time Colin's arms came up and around; for someone who was asleep he had a very firm grip, anchoring Colin's head in Cassiel's lap. Cassiel considered the situation. While he could fairly easily detach Colin, he probably couldn't do so without waking him up - and he was aware from the circles under his eyes that Colin could probably do with more sleep to combat the stress of the various monster incursions.

Cassiel picked up his phone to find something to read and let Colin sleep on.

He only noticed that Colin's bedroom door hadn't been latched properly and had swung ajar now that the wedge was gone at the same time he heard both a knock and Colin's mother cheerily calling, "Knock knock!"

The door swung open fully. "Don't mind me, just getting your-" Sally stopped abruptly, one hand still on the doorknob, as she took in the scene in front of her.

"Be not…concerned," Cassiel declared as quietly as he could, noting the appropriate emotion to assuage as he spoke. "This is merely the aftereffect of overexertion from spellcasting. Colin will be well." He sincerely believed that this would be the case.

"Oh. I…see. A magical thing." Sally didn't sound as though she was entirely convinced; she backed out of the room, but didn't close the door. Cassiel heard her walk along the landing, open and close another door, then return; she appeared back in the doorway bearing a blanket. Briskly Sally crossed the room, unfolding the blanket as she went, and draped it over Colin's lower half.

She paused, her expression oddly tender as she looked at her sleeping son. She caught Cassiel's eye and smiled ruefully. "He used to be like this as a child, you know? Always hugging people, and if he fell asleep on or near them, well-" She gestured gently at Colin, still clinging onto Cassiel. "But, it turns out that teenage boys don't like being called Little Koala, or even being caught hugging people for affection…it's nice to see he's still my little boy underneath, even if he can throw fire with his mind now."

Cautiously Cassiel suggested, "I do not believe Colin would be unduly upset if you were to take a photo for the memory."

Sally barked out an involuntary laugh, clapping a hand over her mouth to muffle it. Colin grumbled in his sleep and squirmed, glomming on Cassiel more tightly. Both adults stayed silent until he stilled once more.

Sally, her voice low but dripping with fond amusement, said, "He would definitely be upset if he knew about it, and I'm not going to take a photo knowing that - but thank you all the same." The tension had smoothed out of her shoulders; Sally favoured Cassiel with another smile, this one more genuine. "And thank you for looking out for him like this, even if it is a bit…odd, let's go with odd. I'll leave you both to it."

With that, she went over to the laundry basket in the corner, picked it up, and left the room again, quietly closing the door behind her.

---

Colin didn't tend to wake up all at once even on his good days - he was better than Dana but that wasn't exactly a challenge - and while today had the warm fuzziness of a good day it came with an extra dollop of confusion.

For one thing, his pillow was oddly solid.

He reached up and tried to massage it softer; it resisted his efforts - and it…was…warm?

"Please don't do that, Colin."

Colin was suddenly very awake.

Colin shot across the room on pure adrenaline, somehow grabbing the blanket over him without tripping himself up and fumbling it around his waist. When he finally came to a stop and managed to convince himself to meet Cass's eye, his friend looked almost (dare he say it) impressed.

"What the fuck Cass?" Colin winced as his voice came out somewhere in the region of a squeal; he had some idea of what had happened, at least up to a point, but everything after coming across the toy was stubbornly refusing to come into focus.

Cass raised an eyebrow. "You were in feline form and in some difficulty," he recounted calmly, "I brought you back here, worked out the time limit issue, and encouraged you to change back to human."

"Okay, but what about…" Colin gestured vaguely in the direction of Cass's lap and was mortified to see a damp spot on his trousers - he'd only gone and drooled on his friend, hadn't he?

"The encouragement required a certain amount of bribery in the form of ear scratches," Cass admitted like he was admitting to buying bread at the supermarket, "And when you changed back you promptly fell asleep in the same position. I felt you needed your sleep."

Colin drew breath to apologise - at which point Cass added (like the bastard he was), "As did your mother." The noise Colin made instead was somewhere between an indignant squeak and being strangled. That explained the blanket - and probably meant there was an incriminating photo, or at least the threat of telling other people as an 'amusing family story'.

"Bloody hell…" Colin knew he was being both overly dramatic and a little unfair given Cass had probably just saved his sanity, but he was struggling to feel grateful right at this second. "If you're sticking around, could you at least turn your back so I can get dressed?"

Cass looked oddly uncomfortable. "I'm afraid I cannot," he admitted, "You were lying there long enough that both of my legs have gone numb and turning is not currently viable. I could technically fly to give you privacy, however I do not feel it wise to experiment with landing in this state."

"Oh for…" Colin bit off further cursing and settled for grumpily stomping about, blanket firmly gripped, finding his clothes. He slunk into a corner, faced the wall, and did the traditional dance of trying to get dressed under a blanket. He knew Cass wouldn't care - and from the surprised note of pain that was possibly Cass's first experience of pins and needles was too distracted to look - but he cared, and that was what mattered.

By the time Colin turned around again, mood slightly improved by the addition of trousers, Cass was on his feet and only grimacing a tiny bit.

"Okay, damage control time," Colin stated firmly. "Whatever happens we do not let Dana find out about this." He pounded his right fist against his left palm for extra emphasis.

Cass looked confused, tilting his head. "Why Dana specifically?"

There were times Colin wanted to shake Cass, there really were…

"Just trust me on this one, okay? She'll go weird, it'll all be weird, we don't want to deal with that level of weirdness. In fact," he continued as spotted Cass preparing to comment, "to make it easy let's just go with a blanket promise not to talk about it, right? If something happens and people need to know about the transformation time limit and its side effects, I'll talk about that, but not the rest."

"That seems…reasonable," Cass replied, frowning a little. "Although I would ask in return, for your own safety, that you promise to give me more details should you plan to carry out any more research. I was…concerned that the time taken to understand the problem may have negatively impacted the outcome. Had I not been able to reach you I would have had to recruit John at a bare minimum to magically force your humanity back onto you, and that likely would have led to permanent harm."

"Okay, yeah, fair, I didn't think this one all the way through," Colin replied sheepishly, "So deal - you don't talk about it, I won't experiment without giving you a better heads up."

Cass gave him the hint of a smile at the for once benign use of the concept. "Deal accepted. Now, if you'll excuse me…"

Colin blinked, and Cass was gone.

---

A few days later Colin approached Cass's church with a small gift bag hidden in his rucksack. There were probably faster ways to find his friend but in the circumstances they all felt rude - worst case he'd just have to pull up a pew and wait for a while, or try another day.

For once, luck was on his side; Cass was there, contemplating the sunlight streaming through the stained glass window over the altar. Colin unslung the rucksack from his shoulders and fumbled the gift bag out as he walked; Cass had clearly clocked his approach as he barely moved in response to the footsteps.

"Colin." Cass nodded politely as Colin drew level with him.

"Cass. Here." Colin thrust the gift bag at Cass. "I got you something."

Cass took the bag curiously, turning it in the light to catch the sparkles from the glitter.

Colin gestured at the bag. "Go on, open it."

Cass reached into the bag and took out the slightly tacky Stonehenge snow globe from its nest of tissue paper. Colin couldn't remember seeing a smile that big - for all it wasn't that large in the greater scheme of smiles - on Cass's face before.

"I figured it might be your kind of thing, and yeah…" Colin ran his fingers through his hair, adding to its usual state of disarray. "Look, I was an arse the other day and you did save my hide so…thank you, is what I'm trying to say."

Colin had been wrong - that was the biggest smile he'd ever seen on Cass.

"It is appreciated, although you should never feel you have to purchase my assistance," Cass replied gently.

Colin shrugged, looking away. "I scared you - sorry, 'concerned' you - and then I was ungrateful 'cos I was embarrassed. If it makes you feel better then think of it as something to seal the deal, yeah?" He pulled up a smile of his own. "Hush money, right?"

"Indeed." It was just a word, but Colin's nerves loosened their grip at the understanding in Cass's tone. His face relaxed into an honest grin in return and he could finally meet his friend's eyes.

Cass held the shared look for a moment, then held up the snow globe in a beam of sunlight and gave it a gentle shake. As they both watched the sparkles swirl he said, out of nowhere, "Nepeta cataria."

"Excuse me?"

"It's the Latin name for a plant more commonly known as catnip." Colin's grin froze.

Cass continued contemplating the snow globe, apparently oblivious to Colin's reaction. "So named because of the effect it has on many members of the various feline families - hyperactivity, affection, sleepiness and drooling. I was recently made aware of its existence and that it can be purchased in toy form, and have been considering whether Kitty might appreciate a gift."

Colin struggled with the urge to call Cass a bastard. "I'd check with them first - it's one thing getting high on purpose, but not if it's a surprise," he managed to say, congratulating himself on managing to keep his voice completely even and normal-sounding.

"Ah." How Cass managed to convey so much meaning in a single syllable Colin never knew; this time he could hear the piece of the puzzle clicking into place. "Yes, I can see how that would be distressing. I will definitely consult with them before gifting them such an item."

He caught Colin's eye, and while he was also straight-faced Colin could see the twinkle that made it clear Cass knew that Colin knew exactly what the real question had been. Colin couldn't help his mask slipping, the mingled amusement and irritation twisting the corner of his polite grin into something that conveyed that he knew that Cass knew that he knew and precisely what he thought about that.

To cover the moment he clapped Cass on the back - an unfamiliar gesture for both of them even if normal for Colin and any of his 'guy' friends - and said, "I better get a shift on, Neil's expecting me at the garage. Catch you later, Cass."

Cass's forehead wrinkled for a moment as he rolled the phrase and gesture around in his mind. "Indeed. 'Catch you later', Colin."

Colin left the church as fast as a nonchalant walk could take him, hoping to leave the entire incident behind him - at least as far as Cass was concerned. His mother - and Macey, who would never forgive him if she didn't hear about the funny parts of what had happened from him first - were going to need very different handling…

[musedbyalli]

EILONWY LOOKED UP TOWARD SEVERUS, failure wasn’t an option, she was very well aware of that though the dreams bothered her, they simply felt too real to be anything but a dream. Her power was something that she knew that Lord Voldemort would want, the dragon flame was a powerful weapon and if it fell, if she fell into the wrong hands then it could only mean disaster. Though right now it was like she was nothing more than a ticking time bomb.

“Failure isn’t exactly in my repertoire” She commented offering a hint of a smile, though it was faint. She was about to speak when she heard the footsteps of McGonagall enter the room, “One of my students told me what happened” The head of Gryffindor commented making Eilonwy look up, “I fail to see why you didn’t tell me sooner Eilonwy” The redhead looked to Snape then back to the other professor “Dumbledore told me not to say Professor..” Though Minerva was hardly surprised at the notion. “I see.. Well, let’s get you to the next lesson, thank you Severus” Eilonwy went to get to her feet though her head started to feel a little faint.

Images flashed before her eyes, a memory? It was hazy. She saw Merlin again, though it wasn’t happy as it used to be before, the sky was dark the smell of smoke filling her nose, ash drifting upon her skin and there within the smoke was a dragon, red scales mixed with orange and charcoal black, eyes like fire and they pierced into her, as if she were looking into its soul. “Eilonwy!” The voice snapped her out of it.. Hang on, she didn’t remember herself finding the floor. Had she fainted? Though the voice hadn’t been McGonagall’s, had it been Merlin’s?

“Emrys..” She muttered to herself unaware that she had said the old Warlock’s name aloud. Minerva gave Severus a rather worried look as she helped the girl sit back up. Something had happened, something she was sure she had been tied to but what did it all mean? No matter how much Eilonwy tried to figure out the pieces, the jigsaw just didn’t fit. “Don’t get up too quickly” Minerva stated to the redhead as she tried to move. “I’m fine..” stubborn to the bone. She didn’t look fine, pale, tired.. The fire starting to form in her palms again though with a few deep breaths she eased herself back. Bright blue hues looked up to Snape, there was that ambitious look in her eyes that anyone would have sworn was a Slytherin gaze. “Teach me to control it” Eilonwy commented, though her head of house had some reservations. “Eilonwy I don’t think it’s a good idea, we should get you to Madame Pomfrey” Though Eilonwy gave a shake of her head. “You told me not to fail, so this is me not failing. Teach me how to control whatever is happening to me, whatever I am..” how it was any wonder she was in Gryffindor and not Slytherin indeed was another matter.

Severus silently observed the interaction between Eilonwy and Professor McGonagall.  He had planned on speaking with her about this student later, once all classes for the day were done.  It was something that he had felt that McGonagall needed to know as well, especially as Eilonwy’s head of house.  Still, it was pleasant to learn that McGonagall truly didn’t know about this either, as Eilonwy had said.  Not that he felt that she would be able to deceive him, but he was a rather distrusting individual.

While there was more that he’d like to ask about the dreams, he wasn’t about to argue with Professor McGonagall.  While his own curiosity was peaked, Severus could be content that McGonagall could handle the situation.  Still, he would keep an eye on the situation.  To him, the difficulties that could arise from this were more than one person could handle on their own, even one as skilled as McGonagall.  Before he was able to respond to the fellow Professor’s words to him, Eilonwy was on the floor.  

The Gryffindor student’s collapse to the floor had been rather unexpected and had led to a quick shared glance between professors before shifting towards the young girl.  The name that she muttered was one that Severus hadn’t expected to hear.  It was one that he wasn’t all that familiar with, although he knew he had heard it before in the past.  From McGonagall’s expression, he could tell that she had heard the name before too.  

The fire in her palms was impossible to miss.  Severus was sure that McGonagall had to see that this was becoming a problem.  In the back of his mind though, he wondered how Dumbledore couldn’t have seen this happening and if he did, why he didn’t give any of the Professors a warning in advance.  She was in their classes and was seeming like a time bomb at this point.

The look of ambition was one seen in many Slytherins, as well as Gryffindors even though he wasn’t a fan of admitting that he could see how similar some members of that house were to his own.  It was odd sometimes how the Sorting Hat made its choice, but over the years Severus had learned not to question it.  

“Professor McGonagall has a point.”  While she appeared fine, it would likely be for the best to get Madame Pomfrey’s opinion.  Of course, there was the possibility of this being a danger to the woman too.  Plus, there were still classes he needed to teach.  Later after the woman’s okay and his teaching duties were over, perhaps it could work.  He hated extra time with students, but this was something that couldn’t be overlooked.  

“Your lessons can begin tonight, unless you are against it or would prefer to take this task on alone.”  His gaze shifted to the fellow Professor, who he did actually care about the opinion of.  

[anashins]

If You're Willing to Kiss || Taeyong

“If you’re willing to kiss, then let’s show him what he’s missing out on.”

During a stupid round of spin the bottle, your crush kisses someone else, but you make sure that he'll regret it very soon.

_____

“Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss!” the people in the circle chanted and clapped their hands simultaneously to the rhythm of their voices.

You watched in rigidity as your female best friend and your crush Jaehyun were about to kiss each other.

Reluctantly, they crawled to the middle of the circle as the chants only increased in their volume the closer they approached the spot until they were awkwardly sitting in front of each other, almost not daring to look into the opposite’s eyes, their cheeks visibly flushed.

At the same time, your heart broke into a thousand pieces.

You hadn’t signed up voluntarily to play this stupid game of spin the bottle as you sure had better things to do on a friday night, like reading or sleeping.

But you couldn’t have said no when Jaehyun had tagged you along to this party as all your friends were coming as well.

At first, you had been excited about it, because wherever Jaehyun went, you would willingly join him as you always wanted to spend as much time with your crush as possible.

After years of having hidden your feelings, tonight you had gathered enough courage to finally make a move.

But now he was about to kiss your best friend, and you felt utterly devastated as you watched how they slowly pressed their lips onto each other.

The people before had only shared light pecks without even touching one another at other parts, but Jaehyun and your best friend did not only kiss longer than required, they also started to put their hands on each other’s bodies, not minding the cheering crowd at all as though they had drifted off to their own world.

You felt sick in your stomach, murmured something along the lines of a hurried apology and excused yourself to the bathroom.

Splashing water into your face, you looked into the mirror while your fingers gripped so tightly onto the sink that your knuckles turned white in the process.

No wonder, you had always felt like that your best friend was a hundred times more beautiful and intelligent than you. Every guy wanted to go out with her, then why not Jaehyun as well?

You had seen the way they turned shy, the way they flushed at each other, and then the way they shared a chaste, yet deep first kiss with 20 other people as witnesses. You may be in love, but you weren’t naive.

If one kiss could change everything, then this had been the kiss.

The kiss he had been supposed to share with you. The kiss you had wanted to save up until it was now too late.

And before the first tears started running, you wanted to go home. Nobody would care anyway.

“Y/n, are you in there?” you suddenly heard from the other side of the closed bathroom door.

It was Taeyong, Jaehyun’s close friend, and the only one who knew about your secret crush.

“Yes, I’ll come out soon, no worries!”

You had forgotten that he was also here, but he hadn’t participated in this round of spin the bottle anyway.

Taeyong only knew about your crush because you had once poured out your heart to him when you were drunk, and until this day, you regretted it deeply as he never failed to miss a chance to tease you about this.

But always, he had kept his lips sealed in front of Jaehyun, and for this, you were grateful.

So of course he would now be the only one knowing about your true feelings after having witnessed your best friend and crush kissing each other.

Yet, you tried not to let any of your true emotions slip as you opened the door and faced him with the brightest fake smile you could pull off.

“Sorry, I just wasn’t feeling well. I think I’m going home.”

“Uh-huu…”

Taeyong inspected you from head to toe, and then decided that he wasn’t satisfied with this answer.

“You sure about this or are you just affected by the clownery Jaehyun has just pulled off?”

It had been a given that you couldn’t lie to him about this topic. Somehow, he must have gotten wind of what had happened. Perhaps, he had also purposely followed you to the bathroom.

You were just asking yourself why.

“Look, Taeyong, I don’t want to talk about it, okay?”

“Lately,” he started, “he has been talking about her a lot.”

You hesitated and gulped. “About… my best friend…?”

Silently, he nodded, confirming your fears and making your stomach churn. It hurt you more than anything ever before, and you were rendered motionless.

“I want to go home,” you then said in the same robotic manner.

At home, you could pour all your feelings out and finally started crying instead of staying at this place where you had to watch them getting closer and your best friend taking the place at your crush’s side that was supposed to be yours.

“Either that or you could stay,” Taeyong suggested.

You frowned. “Why would I want to stay?”

“Jaehyun is an extremely jealous person. If he sees you with someone else, he might regret it and realize that it’s you that he wants.”

“That’s stupid,” you judged and crossed your arms.

“How long have we been knowing each other, y/n?” Taeyong asked. “Long enough for me to know that if you don’t do something now, you will whine about it for ten years, and - no offence - I don’t have the time and patience to hear about your unrequited love for much longer. Either you do something now or you let go of him.”

“It’s already too late,” you commented dryly and wanted to pass by him, but he grabbed you by your arm, making you stop.

“Are these the words of a young woman who had fought her way through the crowd to the first row to see her favorite band up close, elbowing people to the left and right? They’re not! They’re also not the words of someone who had threatened an online seller with an imaginary consumer advice centre when they didn’t want to return her money! And you want to let him go just like that? If there was anything you have taught me, y/n, then it’s the fact that it’s never too late.”

Turning keen-eared, you asked, “So what do you suggest?”

--

Shortly after, you found yourself being part of the spin the bottle circle again.

Of course your eyes hadn’t missed out on the longing gazes Jaehyun and your best friend were throwing at each other while more and more people gathered in the middle of the circle to amuse the crowd with their kisses.

You were angry on the inside, but also full of nervousness as the bottle spun again and Taeyong jumped up, paused, and then reached out his hand to make it stop at the right time.

And the bottleneck was pointing directly at you. You inhaled deeply.

“Hey Taeyong, you wanna kiss her so badly or what?” someone shouted.

Another one added with a laughter, “He’s finally shooting his shot.”

“Shut up, the bottle is pointing at her, so that’s the rules.”

No one complained though as he crawled to the middle and you did the same. It was as though the crowd, your fellow students, actually had been wanting to see you two kiss for a long time, and you wondered whether you were right with your suggestion and why they would think that way.

Taeyong… he had always been there by Jaehyun’s side. He was Jaehyun’s friend, not yours.

Even though he always helped you with homework when you forgot yours. Even though he always handed you water at parties to keep you sobered. Even though he always gave you a ride when you missed the bus. Even though he always made you laugh when you were sad about Jaehyun again.

Even though, in a situation like this, he wanted to help you again.

There were many things Lee Taeyong did for you, yet you had never considered him your friend.

You wondered whether he felt the same way when he leaned in to you.

“If you’re willing to kiss, then let's show him what he’s missing out on,” he whispered only for you to hear. “If you’re willing to kiss, then close your eyes.”

But before you did as you had been told, you threw a last gaze at Jaehyun who looked at you with a mouth slightly agape.

Surprised that it might work, you grinned inwardly as Taeyong’s lips brushed over yours.

It had been so long that you last kissed someone, but from the first moment on, he proved to you that he was indeed a very good kisser.

Taeyong’s lips moved with yours in a very chaste way that had even something romantic to it, and it surprised you, to say the least. It was not even the manner in which Taeyong kissed you that gave you this feeling, but the way he made you feel, the emotion he delivered.

So comfortable, so warm, and raw, and you wondered whether this had been his intention all along or whether this was the usual manner in which he kissed.

So you didn’t wonder when you suddenly noticed him leaning in to you and bending your body to the point of you having to wrap your arms around his neck to look for support so as to not fall backwards, yet you didn’t stop.

Before, you had agreed on fake kissing passionately to rub it under Jaehyun’s nose, but truth to be told, the line between faking and reality slowly started to blur as you genuinely began to enjoy kissing Taeyong.

With his hands now holding onto either side of your waist, he parted your lips to deepen the kiss, and you gladly let him do so.

Even when he started using his tongue, you didn’t make him stop like he had asked you to before in case it would get too much, but you didn’t want him to just yet and pulled him even closer.

You only stopped in the moment Jaehyun interfered with an, “Enough now, it’s only a game!”

But when you pulled away and looked into Taeyong’s sparkling eyes that radiated so much fondness, you wondered how you could have missed the affection he had been holding towards you all this time.

You didn’t care much about Jaehyun’s opinion anymore. Or who he was kissing.

Because if one kiss could change everything, then this had been the kiss for you.

[nextdoor-neighbors]

Shut Up and Kiss Me (George Weasley x Reader)

Pairing: George Weasley x Female Reader

Word Count: 551

Summary: After getting ditched by your Yule Ball dates, you and George find yourself spending some time together

A/N: This is my first attempt at something short like this so I hope it’s okay!

You sigh, leaning against the wall with your arms crossed, watching as your fellow classmates laugh and dance as The Weird Sisters perform. Your date (who wasn’t your first choice as a date, but still) ditched you, and you can see him across the room, dancing with some other girl from your year.

You let your gaze drift around the room. You’d been so excited about tonight, regardless of your best friend and longterm crush George Weasley not asking you. Someone else had asked you first, so he ended up finding someone to go with at the last minute. But you couldn’t help but wonder why he didn’t just ask you in the first place. Fred, who you always went to about your feelings, said George liked you, too. But, as you stand alone while everyone else has fun, it’s not feeling like that’s true.

“Hey, Y/N.”

You turn towards the voice. Well, speak of the devil.

“Hi, George,” you respond quietly. “Why aren’t you with your date?”

The corner of his mouth quirks up in a gentle smile, making your stomach flip. You’ve always adored George’s smile.

“I was abandoned. I see you were, too?”

You nod in the direction of the dancers. “Indeed I was. Serves me right for going with the first guy who asked me even though I hardly knew him.” You look back at George, who leans against the wall and shrugs, a small smile still playing on his lips.

“Serves me right for not getting to you first.”

You blanch. “I- you- what?”

He takes your hand, pulling it up his mouth and pressing a kiss on the back of it. “Wanna get out of here?”

You’re at a loss for words as your heart begins to pound out of your chest, so you simply nod instead, letting George pull you through the throng of sweaty teenagers. You catch Fred’s eye, who still appears as if he’s having a good time with Angelina. He points at George and winks at you. You give him a thumbs up and grin in return, knowing that if this is going where you want it to go tonight, Fred will be your relationship’s biggest supporter.

You two walk the halls of the school, the clicking of your heels the only sound you can hear. The quiet is a nice change, for once, but it’s not the quiet you’re focused on. It’s George next to you, your hand still in his.

“Um,” you finally say, breaking the silence at last, “what did you-”

You’re cut off by the next chain of events, which starts off with your back hitting the wall and George’s lips crashing into your own. You make a soft sound of pleasure and surprise as he presses you into the wall with his body, one hand gripping your waist through the silky fabric of your dress, and the other hand holding the side of your neck.

He pulls back, keeping his face close. He gazes at you, his eyes dark with passion as he smirks.

“The plan was to tell you how I feel about you first, but I think you get the gist, no?”

He starts to pull away, but you grab him by his tie, pulling him back.

“Just shut up and kiss me, Weasley.”