#Yes it is bad bismuth was bubbled for that long but i genuinely think she was in a situation where she was forced to
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schism-au-blog · 4 years ago
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Chapter 10
Pearl and Rose trekked to Rose’s secret armory. At the bottom of the cliff, Rose shapeshifted back into Pink, swept Pearl into her arms, and jumped up. Her floating powers let her leap all the way to the top without climbing.
Once they were at the top, Pink set Pearl on the ground and they walked the rest of the way to the armory. At the center of the armory floated Bismuth's bubble.
"So you've moved it here?" Pearl asked.
Pink nodded. "It was safer. We can find a better spot later."
Pearl nodded. "Is that what you wanted to talk to me about?"
Pink shook her head. "I saw the metallic gems' base. They're at Bismuth's forge. They've recruited Tiger's Eye, I don't know if they've recruited anyone else."
Pearl's hands flew to her mouth. "No, not Tiger's Eye!” She was silent for a moment. “Before, we never really had to worry about any Crystal Gems defecting," she said softly.
"It's nice they have another option," said Pink, "but it might make us less likely to trust each other."
Pearl looked at Pink in awe. “I’m amazed by the fact that you think about the fact gems have another option now.”
“I always felt bad about the fact that it was nearly impossible for anyone to leave the crystal gems,” Pink said. “That everyone gave up their entire way of life, that no one could go back.”
“That’s Homeworld’s fault though,” said Pearl. “They have the option to accept everyone, and they don’t.”
“But I am Homeworld,” said Pink. “Look at me. I’m a diamond. I should be able to make some change, and yet, I can’t.”
“That’s right,” said Pearl, “you can’t. It doesn’t matter that most gems think you can, that doesn’t change the fact that you’re doing everything in your power.”
Pink sighed. “It doesn’t really matter, anyway. What matters is that we now have information on the metallic gems. We should probably send a spy to collect information.”
Pearl nodded. “I mean they probably won’t actively try to fight us, right? We probably don’t have to actively collect information on them.”
“I suppose you’re right, but I know everything that there is to know about Homeworld and the Crystal Gems. It’s so scary to have to worry about information for the first time,” said Pink.
“Yes,” Pearl said. “I understand. I know she’s new, but I think Gold Pearl could be a good candidate for a spy. She’s bold, and determined to do the right thing. She’d fit in, but I think she’d also be loyal to us.”
“Really? Not someone we’ve known a little longer?” Pink asked. “It might be easy for the metallic gems to convince her to start shattering.”
“If you’re going to send a spy, they’re going to have to act like a metallic gem,” said Pearl. “And that means they might be forced to shatter in battle. I also think that’s why someone less experienced could be a good call. Gold Pearl doesn’t know how to fight very well, so it’s likely they won’t send her into battle just yet.”
Pink nodded. “Thank you for your insight, Pearl. I think we should ask Garnet’s advice, and perhaps Cherry’s. She knows most of these gems better than anyone.”
Pearl nodded. “Bringing Cherry and Garnet into the planning room is a good idea. Anyone else you can think of?”
“Hmm,” Pearl said. “Maybe Desert Glass? She’s a good strategist.”
Pink nodded. “Good idea, thank you Pearl.”
Pearl smiled. Pink still felt completely different than Rose, but she liked feeling like she did well. Pink’s praise was so genuine. It felt like she truly believed Pearl was the smartest gem in the world. She was so perfect, Pearl just couldn’t understand.
“We should probably get some of my tears while we’re here,” said Pink. “No point in disappointing the diamonds.”
Pearl nodded. “I don’t know exactly when they want you to meet up again, we should probably check on that soon. It won’t be good if they can’t find you.”
Pink nodded. She strode to the armory activation and placed her hand on top. A horde of glass bottles rose up. She strode forward to hold one. “This seems good. All I have to do now is cry.”
“Can you do it?” asked Pearl. “I know it’s hard to cry on command.”
“Thank you, Pearl,” Pink said, “but I think I can manage.”
Pink thought about how powerless she was. She thought about all of the planets that had been destroyed by Blue, Yellow, and White. She thought about all of the gems that had been destroyed and would be destroyed. She thought about everyone she hurt, about everyone she left behind. She thought of the shame she’d feel if White ever caught on to what she was doing. Slowly, a tear began to run down her cheek. She made sure to catch it in the bottle. “Do you think that’ll be enough?” She asked.
Pearl nodded. “Catching that much from an enemy leader is impressive.”
“Oh gosh how are we going to explain how we got them?” Pink worried.
“I’m sure they won’t ask, my diamond,” Pearl reassured her.
“But what if they do?”
“The crystal gems kept this somewhere, and I was able to steal it?”
“I suppose,” Pink said. “But what if that unravels? This is all so risky.”
“Just think about being able to heal shattered gems,” said Pearl.
“It will all be worth it,” agreed Pink, “but in the meantime, I can’t help but be scared.”
“I understand,” said Pearl. “I mean, no matter what happens, the diamonds most likely won’t harm you permanently, but I’m disposable.”
“-To them,” Pink finished, when it appeared Pearl was going to leave it there. “But I doubt they’d spare me either, after everything I’ve done.”
“You’d know better than me,” said Pearl. “Of course, now we have to worry about you getting captured or shattered by the metallic gems, too.”
“I’m sure they’d love nothing more,” said Pink. “Which is part of the reason we need information from them. It’ll be less suspicious if Rose sends a crystal gem than if Pink sends a homeworld gem.”
Pearl nodded. “That’s a good point. They’re probably more likely to be cautious of Homeworld than the Crystal Gems.”
“I really stretched myself today,” Pink said sadly. “I don’t think I can go back.”
“Really?” asked Pearl, “Even after Rainbow?”
Pink nodded. “I used a new form to disguise myself when I visited the metallic gems’ base. I guess I’m not as used to it so it takes more effort to maintain.”
“Hmm,” Pearl said. “Maybe you could convince the other diamonds to let you unbubble some Rose Quartzes to see if they also have healing powers?”
Pink grinned. “That’s genius, Pearl! I can fake it so it seems they do, and that way we’ll be able to release some of those poor gems who were imprisoned for looking like me. Let’s request a meeting right away!”
Pearl nodded. Pearl and Pink left the armory, floated down the cliffside, and walked back to the warp. Pearl warped them, and they snuck into the palanquin, despite the extra guards. “Do you think the direct diamond line in the moon base would be the best option?”
Pearl nodded. “They might not approve of an in-person visit, and you just need a quick bit of permission.”
Pearl and Pink walked to the warp and warped to the moon base, closely followed by Amethyst guards all the way up to the warp. When they got to the moon, they hurried up the stairs. Pink sat in her throne. “Pearl, would you please?”
“Yes, my diamond.”
Pearl activated the direct diamond line, which led straight to Yellow. “What is it, Pink?” Yellow asked. She already seemed slightly annoyed, but Pink figured that wouldn’t get much better.
“I got the tears,” Pink said. “They seem to work as rumored, but there’s no way to get a larger supply-”
“Thank you, Pink,” Yellow said, cutting her off. “I appreciate the update.” She reached to turn the call off.
“Wait!” Pink exclaimed. Yellow drew her hand back. “I was calling because I think unbubbling the Rose Quartzes, at least a few of them, that we have in the zoo, could help us understand if they, too, have similar healing powers. Of course, we’d keep them in a small area so that they couldn’t do much damage, even if they were defective.”
Yellow nodded. “Unbubble three and keep them in your palanquin. Let them know that if they’re seen outside your palanquin they will be shattered. Let them know that if they try to injure you or your Pearl in any way, they will be shattered. Let no other gem know you’re doing this,” she ordered.
“Not even Blue?” Pink questioned.
“Not even Blue,” Yellow affirmed. “It’s better to keep this as small as possible, for now.”
“Thank you, Yellow,” said Pink.
“It’s a good idea,” Yellow complimented. “Is that all?”
“Yes, Yellow,” Pink said.
Yellow reached over and hung up the call.
Pink squealed, picked up Pearl, and spun in a circle. “Isn’t it great, Pearl?!” She set Pearl down.
Pearl smiled. “I’m so proud, my diamond.”
“I was actually able to do something!” Pink squealed. “We have to go let them out now!”
“Yes, my diamond,” said Pearl.
Pink scooped Pearl up and floated to the bottom of the base. She set Pearl down and Pearl activated the warp to Pink’s ship. Pink stepped inside.
She started to run, and the ship moved with her. She jumped into the air, and fell clumsily to the ground. She laughed. “Well, I got it into the air.”
“You’ll do that gracefully yet, my diamond,” Pearl told her.
Pink grinned. “I don’t care! I can’t wait! How long do you think it’ll take?”
“A few moments, my diamond,” Pearl informed her. “It shouldn’t take too long.”
Pink threw her head back “Ugh! I just wish I could free all of them!”
“Perhaps if Yellow sees this as a success, she’ll let you continue with the rest.”
Pink suddenly froze completely upright. “Wait, how am I going to sneak out of the palanquin without letting them know my secret? There’s no reason for ‘Pink Diamond’ to be gone so frequently.”
“You can pretend to go to the moon base, my diamond,” Pearl said. “Or anywhere, really. Warp somewhere as Pink, then shapeshift when you get there.”
“Goodness Pearl, how didn’t I think of that?” Pink questioned.
“We probably should’ve been doing that this whole time,” said Pearl.
Pink pressed her face up against the glass. “Come on, ship. Come on, ship. Come on, ship!”
“We’re nearly there, my diamond,” Pearl said. “If you want, I can chart our flight path for you.”
“Would you, Pearl?” Pink asked, spinning around to look at her. 
“Of course, my diamond,” said Pearl. She projected a dotted line connecting Earth to the Zoo, with a blinking light representing where the ship was at the moment. It was about 2/3s of the way to the Zoo.
Pink grinned. “We’re so close! Are you excited?”
Pearl looked at Pink’s beaming face. She couldn’t help but smile too. “Very, my diamond.”
“How do you think I should introduce myself? ‘Hi, I’m Pink Diamond, but of course, you already-’” she huffed. “No, not dignified enough.” She tried again. “‘Greetings. You have been given a new assignment. The rebel Rose Quartz has healing powers that we would like to replicate. We have unbubbled you, for the time being, to study these healing powers. In the meantime, you are not to leave this palanquin. As Rose Quartzes in the same batch as the rebel leader, you are considered defective, and any misdeed will be heavily punished.’ Is that too intimidating?”
“No, my diamond,” said Pearl. “I think that’s precisely how they’d expect you to treat them.”
“Ugh,” said Pink, “I don’t want to mistreat them.”
“But anything else will seem suspicious,” said Pearl. “It’s hard. But I think the best thing for now is to keep them, and yourself, safe.”
“You’re righ- I see it!” Pink said. She saw the human zoo. She felt a pang of guilt as she thought about all of the humans imprisoned there, but gave her hair a poof and stood up tall. She could put on her Diamond act long enough for this visit, especially since she’d get to free some Roses.
Taglist: @suartz
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novantinuum · 6 years ago
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Fandom: Steven Universe
Rating: General Audiences
Words: 4.6K~
Summary: In another world, he doesn’t have his mother’s sword or shield to hide behind when Bismuth lands her strike. The bubble pops.
Steven falls apart.
Chapter summary: In which Greg receives some answers, Bismuth faces her consequences, and Steven really needs to go to bed.
First | Last chapter
While I’m cross posting all of these to tumblr, I’d love to have your support over on AO3 too! Plus, it’s easier to subscribe there. A win-win, I’d say. Excitingly, this is the longest chapter yet.
Chapter 5: Onward
“So… hold on,” Greg says slowly, raising his hand to cut off the others’ incessant yammering. “Just lemme- let me take a moment to see if I can properly wrap my head around everything. So you’re saying that—“
He turns on the one they identified as Bismuth, pointing at her with such ferocity that his finger might as well be a— what did they call it again? Oh, yes!— a ‘breaking point’ itself.
“—that she tried to kill my son by smashing his gem?”
“Mmmhmm,” Garnet nods.
As usual her eyes are entirely hidden behind her opaque visor, something that always made getting to know the Gem particularly daunting in those early days, but by now he’s close enough to infer her full disposition from her body language and tone alone. And as far as he can tell from the clipped words and stiff movements, she’s pissed. The full brunt of her anger is thankfully restrained… he imagines for Steven’s sake. He hugs his son closer, the boy currently nestled against his midsection and sitting on the fountain’s rim. Garnet sits on his other side, with Amethyst next to Steven. Pearl, meanwhile, kneels on the ground holding a surprisingly deep-cut gemstone in her lap, the very gemstone that by all rights should be embedded in his son’s navel but currently isn’t. He frowns and tugs at his hair (a bad habit of his, over the decades), finding his thoughts growing more and more fragmented over this by the second.
“But she only tried to kill him because she thought he was Rose… who bubbled her thousands of years ago because she wanted her to shatter Pink Diamond. But then Rose actually was Pink Diamond… all along? And somehow fake shattered herself?”
“Yup, that’s pretty much it,” Steven says with a faint laugh, no amount of falsified cheer able to conceal the conflict brewing within him. Greg watches him clutch at the bottom hem of his shirt, and his heart nearly shatters right there on its own. His boy’s grown worryingly savvy as of late, plastering on a brave face whenever he thinks the others can’t handle the full burden of a child’s stress. He probably assumes he’s getting away with it, too. His mistake. One of the many things fathers grow attuned to over the years is the habits and facial tics of their children. All that said, if this is troubling for him, he can’t begin to imagine how traumatic and confusing this upheaval is for Steven.
God, and he’s only fourteen! He shouldn’t have to deal with any of Rose’s war fallout.
“And then,” Greg continues, gesturing between his son and the pink gem Pearl holds, “before she could actually kill him he split in two?”
“It was almost like he abruptly unfused,” Bismuth supplies, maintaining a healthy distance from the rest of the group.
“But it didn’t feel like fusion at all,” Steven says, and shudders. “It hurt, it hurt really bad.”
“He was unconscious for at least a minute. The half with the gem, the pink one, started screaming and tried to fight me away from him but I knew I had to get him off the forge’s surface so he didn’t burn.” The rainbow haired Gem hangs her head in shame. “I was so worried he wouldn’t wake up ‘coz of me.”
“Yeah, sure ya’ were,” Amethyst spits, and crosses her arms.
Pearl’s eyes narrow with a precise intensity. “Amethyst, please. Not now.”
Contrary to whatever assumptions on her he held before, Bismuth shows no inclination to argue in any vain hope of saving face. Instead she stands stiff before the group, appearing just as haunted by the consequences of her actions as Steven is. While the back-and-forth between her and the Crystal Gems continues, her fingers twitch, desperately yearning for something to tinker with. As someone who frequently seeks out the reliable comfort of strumming improvised chords on his guitar in times of stress, he can relate. Of course, far be it for him to excuse this new Gem’s actions when they almost cost him his only son, but at least she has the decency to express remorse over it. He’s furious at her, he truly is, and yet… He also can’t help but feel a twinge of pity lighten his heart upon hearing her side of the story. Huh, funny. Normally he’s more apt to harbor a stone cold grudge over this sort of stuff. He blames his kid’s influence.
“I was angry at Rose, not Steven,” Bismuth says as he tunes back in to the conversation. “I was so sure that this was all just another one of her lies that I— well, you all know. But when I saw what I’d done…. When they split apart and he fell to the ground, I—!”
Her voice cracks, and he watches her nearly crumble like chalk.
“I- I made a terrible mistake, and I’m genuinely sorry,” she finishes.
“‘Kay, so you’re super sorry and promise never to hurt him again, we get it,” Amethyst says, blunt sarcasm oozing from her words. “But seriously, is no one gonna address the ginormous cluster hangin’ over our heads? Y’guys! New headline! We just found out Rose was a total sham!”
Steven holds up a finger as he interjects. “Actually, we don’t know anything except that she was apparently Pink Diamond, but…”
“Yeah, and Pink D’s like, the bad guy, Steven! She’s the reason they had to fight this whole stupid war in the first place! And then, what? She creates you just so she doesn’t have to deal with the fact she’s a liar?”
The young teen shrinks away from her anger, a lump forming in his throat. Greg’s jaw clenches. His hand tightens around his son’s midsection.
“None of this is Steven’s fault,” Garnet says quietly, firmly placing her sapphire laden hand on the purple Gem’s shoulder to quiet her down. She shrugs away at her touch, lips jutting into a pout.
“Or any of yours’," Pearl says.
Greg’s eyes lock on the slender Gem at her abrupt comment, and he watches with apt attention as her thumb glides across the largest facet of the diamond in her lap. Hearing her voice comes as a surprise, as she’s been unusually absent from this conversation thus far. It seems none of the others want to talk about it in depth right now, but apparently she’s forbidden from mentioning anything about Pink Diamond. It’s yet another betrayal, yet another reason why the sight of the rose blossoms growing wild around them and the delicately carved curly-haired statue at the fountain’s center leaves him with uncertainty gnawing at the pit of his stomach.
And yet… and yet.
What if he’s being a hypocrite about all of this? It’s not like he told Rose everything about his past, either. Rose was a diamond, sure, but— he’s a DeMayo. There’s a number of dark days attached to that name he’d rather let die in the past too. Are they really entitled to the full narrative of the life she left behind? Is anyone?
He scratches at his scalp. “Listen, Amethyst. I understand all of you are upset, and rightfully so. I can’t exactly say I’m thrilled to hear all of this either. But the bottom line is… I know the woman I loved. Maybe not for long, but I grew to know her in ways far more intimate than even some of you. And if there’s one thing I can say for absolute certainty, it’s that… despite her mistakes, despite everything else she probably lied about, her love and respect for all of you was not a sham.”
Pearl nods. “I almost can’t believe I’m agreeing with Greg of all people, but he’s right.”
“And you’re entitled to believe that,” Garnet says evenly. “But no matter what we believe, I still think it’s wise to try not to make assumptions about her in the first place. Either good, or bad. At this point, what we know is what we know, and I can’t see any easy way of changing that in the near future.”
“So, what are we supposed to do about all this now?” Amethyst asks, all her earlier anger dissipated in her exhaustion.
She considers this for a second, visor glinting in the glow of sunrise.
“Nothing.”
“What?”
The fusion doesn’t budge an inch. “We don’t change our tactics.”
“But- but if she was our leader, and we always just blindly followed what she wanted, then—“
“No matter her original intentions, the Crystal Gems, as a movement, is far bigger than one diamond,” she says. “We move onward. We thrive. Never mind Rose.”
Steven squirms in his embrace, and in a small, timid voice— a jarring reminder of the child he still is despite his recent leap in emotional maturity— asks the question he’s sure has been weighing on him ever since he got split apart in the first place.
“What about me, and my—“ he tries and fails to stifle a yawn— “my gem? What am I supposed to do now?”
“We’ll deal with your Gem half when he reforms, and he will,” Garnet says gently. “But right now, you need your rest. We all do. Pearl, Amethyst, help him to the temple and get him tucked into bed. Bismuth, Greg. I need to speak to both of you.”
Everyone nods at the Crystal Gem leader’s directions, and they all act accordingly. His eyes drooping just as much as his son’s despite the pink tinted skies and chirping meadowlarks, Greg helps him stand to his feet. Steven’s knees still quiver but thankfully this time he doesn’t crumple. Pearl loops one of her arms through his, still holding his gem in her opposing hand, and together they begin to plod towards the warp pad they arrived earlier. Amethyst follows them but notably lags behind, guilt written across her face clear as day. She delivers one final glance at Bismuth, razor sharp and flaring with hurt, and then disappears in the orchard’s shadow.
A palpable silence brews between the two remaining Gems then, uncomfortable enough that he’s almost left with sweat beading on his brow just watching them. Eventually doing so becomes too stressful, and he moves to retrieve the downy comforter that’s long since been forgotten on the stone midway to the fountain. He folds the bedding as compact as he can, and drapes it over his non dominant arm, distantly acknowledging that it’ll have to go in the wash. He wishes he could’ve gone home with Steven too. What does she need a human like him for right now, anyways? He’s no fighter, or mediator. The cool grey one blows a nervous puff of air from between her lips and wraps her hands around a few strands of her rainbow dreads. Garnet‘s expression twists into a frown. Stepping towards her, she crosses her arms.
“Bismuth…”
“If you’re going to bubble me away again, just say it,” she blurts out, hanging her head in resignation.
Ever so subtly, Garnet tilts her head as if caught off guard by the visceral hurt pooling in the other Gem's words. In any case, her tone remains steady.
“We’re not bubbling you.”
“What? You’re—?”
“It was avoidable miscommunication that led to that the first time. I won’t let that happen again, especially not to a friend. However,” she says, holding up a finger before the other Gem can interject, “as consequence for striking a fellow Crystal Gem in cold blood, until further notice you are no longer welcome in the temple. You will not seek us out. You will in no circumstance find yourself alone with Steven. If we require your help and you are willing, we’ll call for it. But for now, until we’re ready to begin to forgive, you’re on your own.”
Bismuth’s gaze turns up towards her once more, sober in silent acceptance. She blinks rapidly to stave away the tears, and her lips press together tight. Greg’s unsure if the emotion she’s desperately barring away is remorse about her exile or shell shocked relief that she won’t be bubbled away for another five millennia.
“I encourage you to explore this planet as you reflect upon your actions,” Garnet continues. “I think you’ll find a lot has changed since the rebellion… and I think that with time, so can we all.”
“Am I relieved now?” she asks, voice thick and wavering.
She regards her with a long, searching look as she deliberates. “Yes. You may go.”
At first Bismuth spins on her heels, making to leave, but apparently something else stirs on her soul because she pauses. Taking a deep breath, she whirls back around to face the fusion.
“I know this probably doesn’t count for much after all that happened, but. I truly am sorry, for everything.” She turns to regard him directly, her gaze piercing but sincere. “Tell Steven that I hope he can forgive me one day.” And, to the other Gem: “And tell Pearl I’m sorry for what she had to go through, with Pink.”
“I will.”
“Take care of them, would you? Yourself, too.”
Garnet nods. Perhaps as a final sign of goodwill between old war comrades, she offers her hand. The way she does leaves the sapphire on her palm fully exposed. Greg bets it’s a powerful and evocative gesture to a Gem who is being punished for almost shattering another. It’s a salve, an acknowledgement that you can become better, and I trust that you already are.
Bismuth links her broad fingers between hers, and exhales shakily. “Goodbye, old friend. I hope I’ll see you again one day. And hey, if any of you ever… bismuth me,” she jokes with a weak laugh, “you know where I’ll be.”
She gives her hand a gentle squeeze, and then breaks away. Her eyes can’t quite meet theirs.
“Go in peace,” Garnet says.
Greg and her watch in quiet respect as the rainbow haired Gem turns on a dime and departs from them, leaving both the fountain and the ranks of the Crystal Gems behind as she fades beyond the shadow of the grove. They wait. Not too long after, a bar of pure cyan light shoots to the sky, accompanied by that resonant bell like tone he’s long associated with the warp pads. At the sound some of the tension in his companion’s form finally eases. She reaches to wipe under her visor. Geeze, tonight’s really been a high emotion day for her as well, huh? First she’s reunited with an old friend she hasn’t seen face to face in millennia, and then later that evening she’s met with the terrifying threat of Steven’s mortality…wherein she learns that this same old friend is the reason he’s cleaved apart and cracked to begin with. And then there’s all of Rose’s lies, which— as much as he loved her— he’s sure he’ll also have to wrestle with in the coming season.
She sighs, and turns to him.
“And as for you...”
He scratches at his scalp. “Heh heh, am I in trouble too?”
She chuckles briefly, lips turning up in a soft smile. “No, of course not. The truth is, I need your help. I can’t always… be here, to look after Steven.”
His brow creases. Such oddly specific words from such an articulate person. ‘Be here?’ What does she mean, that she’s leaving the other Gems? That she’s going on some extended mission? And why now, of all times?
“What do you mean?”
“My future vision is clouded, incomplete, but I can sense we’re approaching a crossroads.” She lays both gems on his shoulders, and suddenly her visor flashes away, her three eyes intensely pouring into his, searching, beseeching. It’s the single most vulnerable expression he’s ever seen her convey.
“Greg. He trusts you with matters he doesn’t always trust us with. I know you’ve mostly kept your distance from Gem activities up to this point, but the time is coming when you won’t be able to separate these worlds anymore. I need you to keep a close watch on him. For me. Promise me you’ll do that.”
“O- of course,” he says, mind nervously whirring with an infinitude of uncertain futures based on this new information, and oh golly, does this even lay a finger to what she experiences every moment of every day? “But if you don’t mind me asking, what’s coming? What crossroads?”
“I don’t know,” she admits, her gaze falling wayward. “I can barely see the shape of our future anymore, only faint impressions. And… and that terrifies me. So much has changed so quickly.”
She’s nearly quivering, eyes blown wide, and Greg only now realizes the degree to which he took her unyielding strength for granted all this time. He rocks back and forth on the balls of his bare feet, reaching for an answer on what to do, what to say to support a person who until now, has never been in need of that support.
“Are… you handling things okay?”
Garnet clamps her lips together, taking a moment to ground herself once more. Then with a intentional flick of her fingers, her visor shimmers back into place.
“No,” she says evenly. “No, I’m afraid I’m not.”
He exhales with a prolonged, meandering sigh when the two of them finally reach the temple, solid crystal phasing into existence under his feet in a bright flash of cyan. Despite how long he’s known the Gems, a trip through the warp stream is a rarity for him. In the beginning that was mostly Pearl’s doing— with her staunch refusal of allowing humans anywhere near Gem structures vocal enough to convince Rose to leave him behind. Thankfully Pearl began to tolerate him enough in the later years of the relationship that she lifted the ban. After that he and Rose would occasionally steal away on dates in exotic locations only accessible by warp pad, and while he has many fond memories of his time with her in these breathtaking places he must admit he’s never been a big fan of this form of travel in the first place. He’s not keen on flying for similar reasons— it’s simply too disorientating. What can he say, he’s a wheels to the ground sort of guy.
He carefully steps down from the raised platform. In the loft, bundled under fresh bedding, Steven stirs awake and lifts his head upon hearing their arrival. Dark bags emphasize his puffy, reddened eyes. Greg’s heart seizes at the realization that he’s been crying all on his own, when no one can see him, in the dark.
“Dad, Garnet!” he whispers, forcing a weak grin. “You’re back!”
He tosses the dirty comforter on the floor next to the warp pad, and bounds across the room to him as fast as his weary joints possibly can.
“Hey, buddy,” he says, climbing up the stairs to the loft. He plops himself down at the foot of the mattress. “You all cozy now?”
His son snuggles even deeper under the sheets, clutching one of his stuffed bears to his chest. “Yup, all tucked in.”
“Good, good. I, uh- I’m really glad you’re okay.”
And at these words, exhaustion weighs Steven down like a twenty pound barbell, shattering his brave facade. He visibly deflates, his eyelids drooping.
“Yeah,” he sighs, blankly staring off into the distance.
Upon following the path of his glance, however, Greg realizes that he’s actually not staring at nothing. He’s watching Garnet first and foremost, who’s leaning against the fridge, but more importantly… Sitting smack dab in the middle of the kitchen counter is his inert gemstone, nestled within the cottony folds of a bath towel. Of course. He needn't a second guess of what has him so glum. He leans in to embrace him and Steven immediately reciprocates, flinging his arms around his neck so tight that given the option of comforting his kid or constant, steady airflow he’d choose to forgo the breathing every time.
“Can you sleep here tonight?” he asks, voice brimming with a vulnerability he hasn’t heard from him for a few years.
“Of course. I’ll never say no to a good couch, heh heh.”
“No, I mean— with me, up here. Please. I really, really don’t wanna be alone right now.”
His son pulls away, and peers at him with the most doleful, starry eyes one could muster. He can’t help but chuckle.
“You do know you ain’t gotta pull out the puppy dog eyes on me, right?”
“Yeah, but was it working?”
“All right,” Garnet interrupts, leisurely making her way up the steps to the loft. “Let’s get you back to bed.”
He nods in full agreement. It’s super late, and the kid desperately needs some rest after all the trauma of this evening. Working together, parent and guardian, they help tuck him back, snug and secure. Heeding to Steven’s request, he crawls under the covers as well, leaning against the far wall. Distantly, he notes that he left his van unlocked when Amethyst whisked him away to the fountain, but by this point he’s too comfortable here on this mattress to dream of making the trek across town to fix that. He’ll just have to trust it’ll be fine. Beach City is a small, secluded place, after all. Most residents barely lock their doors at night.
“Garnet, am I even able to fuse with my gem again?” Steven asks meekly, before she can turn to leave them to rest.
She pauses, balling her fist against her mouth as she considers.
“I can’t see everything, but I do know you’ll be alright,” she promises, and reaches down to brush through his dark curls. Delicately, she presses a kiss to his forehead. Steven’s eyes light up instantly. This time, he grins for real.
“Wow, homemade waffles? And we’re all sharing them as a family! Well, except Pearl, of course. But she’s still there with us.”
“That’s right. It’s together breakfast.”
The tension wound through Greg's spine eases at hope’s return to the atmosphere of this household. With a relieved smile, he rubs his hands together. “Guess I’m breaking out the ol’ waffle iron tomorrow, then!”
Steven throws his arms around the taller Gem. “Thank you,” he says, clinging tight. “I really needed that. Can you… maybe stay out here with us too?”
The puppy dog eyes return in force. Any weaker individual (himself included) would surely be powerless to resist this maelstrom of pure Universe charm, but Garnet’s no brittle Gem. From what little she confided to him back at the fountain, he bets she's in want of some alone time right now. True to his predictions, she smiles apologetically.
“I wish I could, but I have some delicate matters that need to be attended to in the temple.”
“Awwwww, man!”
“But I’ll see you at breakfast,” she adds before his burgeoning pout can fully reach his eyes.
This promise seems to placate the boy enough for him to relax into his pillow. His eyes droop as he watches Garnet amble down the stairs. He’s not the only one— Greg’s own eyes are beginning to ache from sheer exhaustion as well. A sudden spike of jealousy overtakes him, upon remembering how the rest of the Gems don’t get tired, and don’t require sleep. If only, if only. Oh boy, tomorrow’s going to be rough, isn’t it? It’s what… at least one in the morning by now? Squinting, he cranes his neck to catch a glimpse of Steven’s alarm clock.
It’s twelve forty-six. Close enough. With any luck he’ll drift off to sleep within the next fifteen or so minutes.
“I love you,” Garnet says from downstairs, directed at Steven. She shapes her fingers into a heart. His lips curve into a smile as he watches this. While he’s never doubted the depth of her affection for him, she isn't often this transparent about it. Perhaps she thought his son could use the reminder in the wake of a terrifying near-death experience.
“Love you too,” Steven chimes. “Goodnight!”
With that, the Gem retreats across the room to the temple door. She holds her palms up to the star insignia. The matching gems light up, glowing a vibrant blue and red, and the magical doorway slides open— almost as if dissolving from the middle— to reveal the private chamber held within. She steps forward and disappears into the bowels of the temple, leaving the two Universe boys bundled under the covers in an uneasy silence. Steven sighs under his breath. Greg can tell without looking at him that something is gnawing away at his son's heart, bubbling up within him like soda fizz.
“Dad?" he eventually asks, flopping onto his side to face him. "Where’s Bismuth? Did she leave from the fountain?”
Yup, there it is. He feared this was coming.
“She’s—“ he pauses, trying to determine how best to phrase this— “Garnet had a discussion with her. She’s not welcome here in the temple until further notice. As punishment.”
Understanding dawns on his face. “Ohhh, so she basically reverse grounded her."
“Exiled, yes.”
“Huh." Steven hugs his plush bear in the crook of his arm even tighter, and stares up at the ceiling beams with a concerningly numb expression. "Well... I guess that’s fair.”
Greg frowns.
“What’s eatin’ you up there, bud?”
“It’s just…" He tussles at the top hem of the sheets, his knuckles turning white. "Even though she tried to shatter me, and that was terrifying and all... I could tell she felt really guilty about it right after. And besides that, she was actually super kind. I hope she’ll be alright on her own.”
“You’re the one who’s super kind,” he says with a soft smile, and reaches out to ruffle his son’s hair. Steven playfully bats his hands away, cheeks flushing at the compliment. “Not everyone your age would ever stop to think about the people who harmed them in that way. Heck, not many adults would, either. I’m not sure I could.”
"But I've also been thinking... Peridot and Lapis tried to kill us when we first met them, too. And now we’re all friends, and it’s fine, right?"
Greg considers this, stroking at his beard. As much as Steven defends their oft-erratic behavior, he's not sure he personally considers those the ex-Homeworld Gems who are bunking in his family's old barn friends yet. The first time he met Lapis, she attempted to steal the ocean and broke his leg. And as for Peridot, she once pushed him off a roof with next to no warning. (God, he would've broken his leg again if it weren't for Garnet's future vision, huh?) But despite his current opinions on them, it's true that they both have a amicable rapport going with Steven (and for the most part, the rest of the Gems) these days. They've made an effort to learn, to grow with the lush Earth around them. Against the very unmovable nature of their kind, they've succeeded in the impossible. They've changed.
"So what if we’re being a little too hard on her?" Steven continues, eyes glistening. "What if it pushes her away forever?”
“Mmm. I understand where you’re coming from, but she didn’t just try to kill you. She almost succeeded. Sometimes there’s such a thing as being too compassionate, you know?” He chuckles, and props himself up on his elbow. “Heh. You really are like your mother, in that way. Y’see, once she told me about the first time she came across a pigeon, and apparently she—“
“Can we please not talk about her right now?” he interrupts, his voice strained.
“S-sure thing,” Greg stutters, mentally smacking himself for not considering the stress the topic of Rose has become for his son before he foolishly ran his mouth. “Sorry, I didn’t think.“
Closing his eyes, Steven snuggles closer to him, scooting under the covers into his arms. “It’s okay,” he whispers, and yawns. “We’re okay.”
Notes:
-Amethyst reacts with more vocalized anger to the Pink Diamond bomb here because she has not yet crossed an integral moment of identity building character development- re: Beta/Earthlings. In canon, she tells Steven after A Single Pale Rose that none of the PD/rebellion stuff should even be their problem, and she’s absolutely right, but here I imagine she’s still at the point where she’s internally making it her problem when it doesn’t need to be. So she lashes out. Wrongfully.
-Meanwhile, Steven’s Gem self hasn’t reformed yet because he was only just healed from being cracked. I figure that takes a lot outta a Gem. He’ll need a bit more time before he’s ready.
__
Finally, when it comes to the long term plot, I’m very excited to say that I now have this one fully planned out. It’s gonna be a sort of alternate s4, with some original “episodes” and an arc forming the framework of the story. Should be fun. But anyways, your readership and support is so appreciated! From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
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faelapis · 8 years ago
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so i’ve had these jasper asks in my inbox for a while... and it’s about time i addressed them. i’ll be focusing especially on that last one and the idea of “deserving” redemption, + some of my own general thoughts to talk about the su narrative, jasper, her relationship with peridot, trauma, steven, and where we go from here. 
it’s time for another jasper post under the cut. 
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steven universe is pretty loyal to the rousseau was right-trope, which basically means that while yes, people are accountable for their actions, everyone are born as a moral blank slate and drawn towards doing what they perceive to be right - if someone is “evil”, it’s because of outside influences, not because they were ‘born’ weak or selfish or cruel. it also implies that anyone has the chance of redemption and renewal. 
one of my more radical stances in fandom is that i don’t think jasper is a bad person. partly because she’s dedicated to a cause she believes is just, and partly because i don’t think any gem is supposed to be “bad”. i think she’s rather selfless - a “neutral good” within her own mind - and to her, the people and places she’s loved are more important than she is. she holds herself to just as high standards as anyone else, if not higher. her views on defects and corrupted gems are incredibly similar to peridot and yellow diamond, and this seems to be the general rule within the yellow sector - your “use” is very much the focus. 
for this reason, it’s deeply unfair to compare her to, say, blue’s quartzes: gems who have spent the last 5000 years with a loving support network of fellow quartzes with and without defects, playing daycare for the zoo humans, not living to fight, under a diamond who wants them to grieve, love, and feel their emotions to the fullest. 
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i think it’s also noteworthy that despite living a completely different life, i don’t actually think jasper’s so hardcore against defects as people give her beef for. not really - at least no more so than peridot, who trash-talks pearl and corrupted gems alike. 
jasper’s treatment of peridot herself is the main example of this, and works as an important contrast between how jasper treats gems with defects VS. how say, someone like holly blue treats them (because yes, actions still matter, even if the why makes sense): 
jasper never lays a finger on peridot, insults her, or otherwise mistreats her. in “the return”, she sounds outright bored, because she believes peridot can handle herself when it’s just a handful of gems. she doesn’t define peridot by her defects. peridot, in turn, feels comfortable around jasper - enough to argue with her, roll her eyes or whine (”we can’t leave yet!” “ugh, fine”), and talk shit in a casual way. she doesn’t think jasper will punish her, hurt her or do anything more than argue back.
holly blue seems to terrorize gems on homeworld’s side, physically and verbally. it’s part of her job, but it’s also out of her own perfectionism and impatience, to keep them in line and remind them to defer to superiors. this is before they do anything wrong, and she’s very much wrong to do so. by contrast, peridot can mess up, or even depend on jasper’s help, and the worst jasper will do is tell her how to attack with the ship, or that they gotta get back to homeworld - she’s stressed, but she doesn’t say either in a demeaning, harsh or cruel way. 
jasper is cruel to amethyst, yes, but there is a very important key difference here: amethyst is a crystal gem. jasper doesn’t fight her for shits and giggles, to keep her in line or “just” because of a superiority complex - she sees her as The Enemy(tm). this is such an important difference, because jasper doesn’t treat gems on her own side this way, even when their defects are blatantly obvious. 
peridot, without her enhancers, is basically “useless” - she’s a crystal gem, and she can’t do her job properly without her screen and fingers... but jasper is outraged at what the crystal gems did to her - taking her enhancers, her status, her dignity. she still wants to reason with her, and doesn’t take any shots (physical or verbal) at peridot the entire time - she may have been told someone like peridot no longer has a use, and she does repeat some of yellow diamond’s rhetoric... but a part of her resists that mindset, because jasper’s a very emotionally-driven person. like pink diamond, peridot is in a box labelled “people i care about”, and so anything bad that happens to them is unfair. it’s not what they deserve... and peridot wants to help her. she tries, genuinely, to explain what’s so great about earth. 
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this is what i mean when i say jasper holds herself to higher standards of usefulness than anyone else. above all, jasper’s fatalistic mindset is a combination of the “yellow sector” ideology and how she copes with trauma. her base response is that if she didn’t do enough to prevent it, she deserved it. she pities herself, but she sees herself as worthless if she can’t do her job - protecting/avenging herself and others.
she also serves to hold characters accountable, in a way that is reminiscent of lapis in “mirror gem/ocean gem”. jasper’s treatment of the crystal gems seems excessively rude and violent at first, but the show dances a very long dance around her motivations. a lot of the point of jasper’s big episodes is to play with your assumptions - even a relatively straightforward episode like “crack the whip” is really about setting up “beta/earthlings”. not just to show what an empathetic and growing character amethyst has become, but to show why jasper was so desperate for revenge. we got to see her actions before her motivations, so when you find out that oh boy did she have reason, it’s a gut punch. it puts everything that just happened in perspective. 
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there’s a reason the show lets steven think jasper is “mean” or “terrible” for a while - and it’s not because she is. it’s because steven, at that point, is holding on to this idea that if jasper’s angry with people he cares about, she’s wrong. everyone he loves are Good. when jasper says something about wanting to beat up rose, or how pissed she is at lapis, that’s just Bad. he “got away” with this mindset with peridot, because peridot was young and didn’t really have any serious beef with the crystal gems. she was “easy mode” - not necessarily a better person, but younger and less cynical about her enemies. 
“why do i never ask follow-up questions?!” is a great line steven says to himself, because that’s exactly how he treated jasper - he eventually tries to help her, but it’s out of wanting to “fix things” more than understanding her. that’s why it needed to fail. steven needed to hear her speech, and to learn the whole story without assuming the other side is evil... and of course, that’s part of what jasper was punished for, too, because that’s how she’s lived her whole life. 
jasper was right about one thing, though - steven only helped after she was declawed. he didn’t care about any of the things she said beforehand. he took every situation at face value, and never considered that maybe she had reason... because that would mean taking a hard look at the crystal gems, his friends, and his worldview. jasper, with her parting words, sort of saved steven from becoming like her - completely entrenched in his own views, never questioning his “side” or the people he cares about. (she wasn’t alone in that, and the whole "bismuth -> bubbled” run was mainly about steven facing hard truths about the people he thinks of as ‘good’, but i digress.)
all of that so he could be punished for not knowing, for assuming, by the show delivering him a failure after harsh truth after failure when trying to help people. jasper being among them, she had to corrupt - a horrible situation born out of assumptions on both sides (that steven is rose and must be held accountable for her actions, that jasper is “bad” and that rose/lapis/ect were right to hurt her). the best way for the show to hurt steven is by hurting others, making him feel both like it’s his responsibility and like he’s helpless... so steven and jasper are a bit alike, in that one, particular self-blaming way.
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ok, i’ve gone on and on, but all of that just leads to the current question: where do we go from here? 
after reaching a truly low point, steven had to slowly recover and build himself up again. starting with small human relations - “onion friend” and “future boy zoltron” were both about this, (which is why i’ll fight anyone who says they were just filler). so was “gem harvest”, letting him connect with family he didn’t know he had... and now, after slowly recovering from some pretty harsh trauma, he’s started to explore. he’s asking questions, finally, about the gems on his side. about rose, pink diamond, and about why the crystal gems won’t just tell him everything. this took him to space, to characters he can still help, if he tries to understand them - which is probably gonna be a part of the road ahead.
but then what about jasper? 
...we can’t know for sure, but i think she’ll be back. i really want her to. corruption is still one of the bigger mysteries of the show, as is the whole situation around pink diamond. jasper is the character who is most obviously involved in both of these, so it’s hard to imagine she won’t pop up in either context. by my own view of redemption - which is redemption in the narrative, through learning that she’s a person and not just a “bad” gem - she’s already achieved that. my main focus is really healing, and i think that’s possible. steven wants to help, and he actually understands her now. 
in the same interview we got this gem about jasper, rebecca sugar also talked about wanting to focus on self-love outside of relationships going forward. as someone who’s been alone, isolated and felt completely unlovable, jasper is a great candidate. that doesn’t mean she’ll never get to connect with anyone or have meaningful relationships... but as with steven, she has to recover first, and focus on herself, too.
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