#Years of merch collecting (and then getting rid of it) has made me a bit of an expert on it.

[iero]

Friendly reminder to all my My Chem merch collectors: It is all about the tag it is printed on! That is how you know if it’s legit or not!

[madthetruemad]

Hi hi! It’s your tenant living in your asks box again. I saw that your requests were open. Could I request a mafia boss!Jing yuan with a reader who his men kidnapped by mistake. Like they thought she was the daughter of some politician who wronged them so they kidnapped her by mistake. I imagine Jing yuan would go:

“you know too much, but I would hate to kill you…be my wife?”

I think mafia!Jing yuan would be a manipulative person so he would have his men try to intimidate reader so he could swoop in and save her, kinda like a good cop bad cop and he’s her knight in shining armor.

Song inspo: shameless by Camila cabello

As always, have a nice day <333 and it’s fine if you don’t fulfill the request immediately or you’re uncomfortable with writing this.

There's not a lot that makes me uncomfortable. In fact, there was one instance that made me drop my phone. It was when I was talking with someone on here (they were telling me about their oc and who they ship their oc with) and then they started talking about kinks all of the sudden and sent me collar and leash pictures without any warning whatsoever and even asked me to pick a color and style of collar and leash 😭

Point is, talking about kinks isn't what makes me uncomfortable, it's asking me to pick a color and style for the collar and leash while sending me pictures of said things

MOVING ON I'm cool with talking and writing about anything just don't send me pictures of ... stuff

For clarification, the pictures you send are fine cause they are like normal and cute, you know? And I genuinely like seeing the jy merch you collect and the jy pictures you send

Sorry for the rant... 😔

side note, I love that song! I listened to it yesterday!!!

Mafia Boss!Jing Yuan x Reader

cw; reader is referred to with she/her pronouns

“This isn’t her, you idiot!”

“H- huh? But- but- look at her hair! It’s the same color and style as the daughter’s!”

“Yeah, but daughter is fifteen years old! Does this look like a fifteen year old to you?!”

“No…”

“Right! You just kidnapped a college student! From a college campus! With her college book bag as she was leaving her college class going to the college bus where she will most likely go to her car with what she uses to go to what? College!”

The man who was yelling slapped his hands to his face in defeat, he didn’t know what he was going to do. If they let you then the cops will be on them and the boss already got them off the first time…

“Ok, so I messed up, what are we going to do now?”

The man looked to the one who messed up and then at the door to the room that you were being held in.

“We’ll just have to get rid of her. Hide her body some where and chalk it up to a college student dropping out and running away from her problems.”

“Will the news even believe that?”

“College students have done worse to get out of their studies.”

The man (we’ll call him Dave), grabbed his gun while the one who messed up (he’ll be nicknamed Charlie), followed after him.

“We’ll shoot her in the head to make it quick,” Dave said as Charlie nodded in confirmation.

Opening the door, however, they were greeted with a different sight.

You were already out of your restraints and laughing at some stupid joke, and their boss was sitting with you and smiling in such a way that was unknown to them.

“B- boss?!”

Dave was quick to holster his gun and hide it beneath his jacket.

Jing Yuan’s gaze shifted to the two men, his smile turning into one that was a bit more strained. Oh, they were in trouble.

“Boys, this lovely lady here was just telling me all that has happened to her in the past few hours, to ease her trouble mind I let her out of her restraints and even told her a few jokes to pass the time until you both came back in here.”

“Listen boss, we-,” but Charlie cut himself off with one sharp look from Jing Yuan. His words dying within his throat in milliseconds as he shrunk a little under Jing Yuan’s scrutinizing gaze.

“This mistake will not happen again,” Jing Yuan said as he stood up and held his hand out for you which you found yourself happily taking. Leaving this room with Jing Yuan definitely beat staying in it.

“Yes sir,” the two mumbled as you both passed them by.

“Thank you again, Mr-“

“There is no need for formalities,” he said as he led you up some stairs and away from the dark rooms that you were held in.

You nodded as you continued to hold his hand, “I- I know that you are probably not a good person in the eyes of the law and everything, but- but I promise not to say anything-“

He hushed you gently as he led you down another hall, this one a bit more brightly lit than the other one.

“I’m afraid that isn’t possible.”

“But why-“

He stopped then, making you stop with him as he turned to look down at you. His free hand came up to grab your chin and make you loop up at him. His thumb slowly moving to press against your lips as his eyes lingered there for a moment before flicking up to meet your eyes.

“Because I have many enemies, my dear, and the moment you’re seen leaving and it’s not in a body bag, then I’m afraid you’ll just become a target and hunted down by people who will torture you for information you do not have.”

What he was saying was scaring you, but what you didn’t know was that Jing Yuan was both resourceful and influential. If he wanted to, then he could make it seem like you were invisible as you left his headquarters, but he wouldn’t let you know that.

“So what- I’m supposed to stay here? What about my school? My friends and family?”

“Oh, I’m not saying that those things are being taken from you. In fact, you’re free to go back to your classes and visit friends and family anytime you want once we make sure it’s safe. However, with that in mind, you’ll also be affiliated with me.”

He stopped pressing his thumb to your lips and tugged your chin and you hand he was holding at the same time, forcing you two be even closer to him.

“Affiliated how?”

“News around the town is already saying how you’re my wife, and to better protect you, we might as well make those rumors a reality.”

“Your what?!”

[goatskickin]

Get to know you: Sims Style

I was tagged by @pooklet

It’s something to do until SFS comes back online 💀

What’s your favorite Sims death?

There’s the one where you can use the Wishing Well and ask for money and the money bag falls on your sim’s head and k!lls them. Hilarious!

Alpha CC or Maxis Match?

I love clay hairs and I love old Peggy and Helga hairs too. Some TS2 clothing meshes have never held any appeal for me, and some alpha stuff that is very beloved leaves me cold. I like the beta look too! I’ve already shared my love of beta-esque eyes.

I've been collecting CC for much too long. Sometimes I go digging through my old af clothing CC wondering what if??? should I recolor that???? is this mesh good, actually?????

I’ve considered getting rid of all of my custom windows and doors (save a few special ones). I feel like Maxis has given us everything we could ask for and more. Plus it might save space for even more CC. More rc's of what I have, less new meshes.

Do you cheat your sims weight?

Like, use cheats for thinness/fatness? No. Not unless I am checking to see if a fat morph I made works.

Do you move objects?

I’ll move any object I damn well please, yeah.

Favorite Mod?

I could say something boring like Gussy Up or the Sim Manipulator but instead I’ll say something cool like the trainset does not catch on fire because it is cool when an object does not have 2% chance of combusting 😎

First Expansion/Game Pack/Stuff Pack?

I really wanted Hot Date as a kid but was mortified to ask for it, so I think I had Deluxe instead?

For TS2 - that would be University I think

Do you pronounce live mode like aLIVE or LIVing?

aLIVE I guess?

Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?

I like born-in-game sims a lot. I have a pic of a very good Vidcund spawn from like, 2014. Judith Curious.

Have you made a simself?

Oh yes. It’s kicking around the internet somewhere.

Which is your favorite EA hair color?

Red! It’s always been red.

Favorite EA hair?

MEG!

Favorite life stage?

Adults and then elders.

Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

I am an awful builder. I like dl’ing other people’s houses though.

Are you a CC creator?

Oh yes! I have a bit of a problem with that.

Do you have any Simblr friends or a Sim Squad?

I am chronically friendly and unable to shut up. As such, someone is bound to fall for my charms eventually.

Do you have any sims merch?

It does not exist but I wish that the TS1 soundtrack was on vinyl. I could relax on a winter's eve to 🎶Under Construction🎶

Do you have a YouTube for sims?

No?

How has your “Sims style” changed throughout your years of playing?

Less grungy! Well, more lightly grungy. Less subject to trends. I’ve been a lot more careful about what I download. I delete stuff all the time.

Who’s your favorite CC creator?

of all time? I could not say. I am a Sims 2 CC historian though

How long have you had Simblr?

2013

How do you edit your pictures?

barely lol. I use one of @pooklet's Photoshop actions

Sometimes a tiny bit of photoshopping for an Apoc C.O.W. picture to adjust a finger or get something to look less clippy but that’s it.

What expansion/gamepack is your favorite?

TS1 – always makin magic

TS2 – I want it to be OFB but OFB is so busted. Seasons I guess! I like weather and plants.

tagging: @pforestsims, @brandinotbroke, @freezerbunny-sims2, @jules-cant-build, @madraynesims, @antisocialbunnysims, @themeasureofasim, @aondaneedles, @bayoubashsims, @rockethorse, @serabiet, @simborg, @virtualpeople, @executables-sims, @hazelpuff and @pixeldolly

[kpop-er]

HYBE BTS MERCH PRICING

I know this is a controversial topic and I also have some strong opinions lol

It's no secret that hybe has been making their stuff more expensive each year. I have been a fan since 2017 and pls tell me why the memories dvds/blurays are getting more expensive by a few dollars each year...

Hybe simply knows that we will basically buy out anything that has to do with bts, especially when we know it's limited. From a business pov I wouldn't expect anything else from them but as a fan I feel slapped in the face. Especially ever since the shipping on weverse got more expensive too, I simply can't understand why they don't offer different shipping options. It was expensive before too, but now it's just crazy.

And the fact that even Jin was surprised by the price of the pyjama says a lot...and still, today when I woke up, it was already sold out which just shows hybe that no matter how expensive their stuff is, people will still buy it.

Another issue I had, which was more of a personal problem, were the many new releases. Every few weeks some new merch would come out and because of the huge trading/collecting community bts have, I always felt the urge to buy EVERYTHING. Like I would get my salary and I would plan out what I could buy from the new merch to pump up my bts collection. It was so hard for me to step away and force myself to buy only the things I really wanted and not give into the urge just because everyone is buying it. You kinda feel left out when you don't have something and that's a huge part of why the merch still sells out even with those crazy prices.

A system that worked for me and which might help someone else who is currently going through the same struggle: Look at your collection and point out 5 items that you love the most. For me that were mostly the concert/memories dvds and a specific version of an album. Now I limit myself to buying only one version of the album and the muster, memories and special release dvds. It's still a lot but I actually enjoy those things and I love collecting the photocards, plus for me it's manageable.

A few months ago I seriously lost control over my money, like I would run to the bank to put cash that I had put aside for vacations and other expenses, back into my bank account just so that I could order more merch. It honestly feels embarrassing talking about this, especially since I am 21 years old now and should be able to spend my money responsibly. Like I have stuff sitting on my shelf that I don't even like and that I can't get rid of.

Point is, I'm so much happier now that I have found a system that works for me and while I understand that hybe is a company that is trying to make the most profit, I still feel like they could tone it down a bit, at least out of respect for the fans who together with and thanks to bts made hybe what it is today.

I would love to hear your opinions/experiences on this so please feel free to leave your thoughts!

[whirlwindflux]

Undersea Adventure: TrotCon 2018

TrotCon is a little special to me - it’s my local Brony Convention. When I say my local Brony convention, I say it with a little bit of sarcasm. At 6 hours away by car from my home in Ontario, most people wouldn't classify it as local, but it is the closest one in operation to where I live! I like a good road-trip and navigating to Columbus is fairly simple and straightforward.

I know it has been more than a month since the convention, but here is how my weekend went! Continue below for a large wall of text!

Last year was my first visit to TrotCon and if you read my weekend review of TrotCon 2017, you’d know I had a fantastic weekend! I was worried that maybe my expectations were set too high and 2018 wouldn't be as awesome as TrotCon of past, but I am proud to report, the weekend was as great as I had hoped it to be! Good news, even with BronyCon and GalaCon occurring the next weekend, attendance stayed level, with new and old faces alike at about 800. For those of you wondering if you saw me during the weekend, I was the guy carrying around either the life-size Blackjack or Little Pip plushie.

Before talking about the convention, I want to talk about the weather we had during the weekend - to say it was wet would be an understatement. It almost felt as if the weather knew the convention theme and wanted to play along. Heavy rain, high humidity, and the sound of cell phone emergency alerts for flood warnings could be heard throughout the weekend. Not sure if anyone else had this problem, but humidity levels in my guest room at the Crowne Plaza were so high that any paper based merch I purchased ended up curling something fierce. No doubt, it was the perfect weekend to be inside, at a convention being held in a hotel with attached convention space.

With good weather while on the road Thursday and no rivers to drive through this year, I arrived in Columbus at 3pm and was able to check in and make my way up to my room. I've always been a fan of the little touches, and the room keys were customized again this year, with a cool play on the con theme and the movie Jaws. The Thursday afternoon/evening LobbyCon experience this year felt a little muted (possibly due to other events going on in the hotel) in comparison to last year, but overall it was easy to find your friends and wait for pre-registration pickup to start.

I learned last year that it was a good idea to get in line early - so I did, and it payed off! I was able to collect my sponsor loot chest and make my way back to my room for the night. Of all the cons I have attended, TrotCon gets top marks for sponsor perks and presentation. This year, the sponsor perks were presented in beautiful hand-stained, customized and packed wooden chests. With all prepaid perks inside and some surprises, this presentation is one of my favourite things about being a sponsor for TrotCon! Also, love the design of the cool tie-dye shirt, it’s unique and stands out in a crowd! I couldn’t believe how many I saw the weekend after at BronyCon! Can’t wait to see what awesome ideas are in the works for next year!

This year, Friday started right on time with Opening Ceremonies. This included the public reveal of the first half of this year’s comic, introductions to our weekend VIP’s and welcoming Guests of Honour. Somehow, I already knew we were in for a great time! Just as the raffle started, I figured it would be a good idea to step out and get my Guest of Honour signatures before the onslaught of long lines later in the weekend. Not only was I able to get right into the autograph lines, they were short, meaning I was able to have a great little chat with everyone present! While TrotCon only invites a few show staff guests, it seems they pick ones that are ready to party and enjoy the weekend to its fullest! Originally I had blocked off a lot of time to get these signatures and ultimately didn't need it. This meant more time for me to browse the Vendor hall, Traveling Pony Museum, Video game room and catch up with friends before my next scheduled event.

As I had a sponsor badge, I was able to attend the sponsor only pool noodle fencing and dueling class. Since the numbers were kept small, it was easy to have a few turns at each to get a feel for it all. Unfortunately, what I learned was I had no aptitude for either, but all in all, had good fun with it. I am glad that more live action events are being tried, explored and added to the weekend - it’s an awesome addition that adds to the TrotCon experience!

Later on, I took some time to stop in at the Canterlot Art Institute panel, getting an easy to understand lesson on expression and pose in drawing. While I have a technique that works for me when drawing, learning from people who have much more experience is always welcome! I find the process of other artists and their techniques very interesting as they always have little tips and tricks that can make a big difference!

The remainder of my Friday night was spent listening to some great live music in the Main Events hall. Although there seemed to be a few issues with sound-check at the beginning which delayed the start of the event, the AV team was determined in getting things sounding right and they did a great job! A shout-out to everyone who performed and everyone behind the scenes that made it possible. Thank you for all that you do!

While Friday was quite chaotic and busy, most of Saturday was quite a bit more laid back and straightforward. Starting my day in the vendor hall, I was able to talk with many wonderful artists and creators. Beyond making purchases, I’ve always found a lot of inspiration in talking with others about their craft and process. Fun fact: It was last year at TrotCon that I was encouraged to try making plushies - it has become one of my favourite hobbies!

The Saturday schedule was perfectly designed with 3 back to back panels I wanted to attend in the Main Events hall. First up was a 2018 variant of one of my favourite events from last year, the panel featuring Heather Breckel. With no particular theme or description, you never know what type of discussion will start! It’s a laid back discussion about comics, art and video games - what more could you ask for? Next up was a voice actors panel featuring Kyle and Lauren. All of our questions were answered by the voice actors of our favourite reformed changeling and student six hippogriff. This discussion was fun and light with Lauren and Kyle playing well off each other! With time flying fast, Elley-Ray and Brenda now took the stage, and while I didn’t know it at the beginning, this would soon be my favourite panel of the weekend! The best way I can describe this panel is that it was food for the soul. A discussion of love, passion, friendship and positivity. By the end of the panel, you felt spiritually recharged! Both Elley-Ray and Brenda had so much knowledge to share with the audience and played off each other perfectly. Before any of us knew it, the panel was over and it was time to find something else to do.

Now was as good a time as any to grab something to eat and take another visit around the vendor hall. After a few more great conversations, and purchases, it was time to attend a few evening panels! From a mythological discussion at the Beasts of Seaquestria panel to a more scientific and mathematical breakdown of the Equestrian Royal Guard, both panels were quite a success! After these panels, it was off to the rave for some great electronic performances! One unique thing about TrotCon is that the convention doesn't sleep - it runs from Noon on Friday to 6pm on Sunday - there is always something to do. Unfortunately, sleep is also important, so most overnight events are lost to me. Maybe one day!

Sunday started with an MLP trivia panel; obscure questions were asked about our favourite cartoon horse show and, for once, I actually knew some of the answers! Uniquely, so called prizes were given to those of us who got the answers wrong - nice twist guys! There was time for a last minute visit to the vendor hall and video game area before the plushie meetup. Piled into a small room with a big table, everyone brought their plushies along to the meetup and after arranging them on the table, we took pictures of the plushie pile. What did you think was going to happen?

With time ticking down to the end, the charity auction began and was full of unique items, all to raise funds for charity. This year, the gimmick was marshmallows. Elley-Ray made a guest appearance to assist the auctioneer and was the life of the party. She kept the crowd lively and bidding all the way through! The end of the charity held quite the surprise; a ritual was performed upon an item to draw away all the negative energy of the weekend and pay it forward, as a gift, to BronyCon. The highest bidder won the item with the stipulation of delivering it to the BronyCon lost and found so it could be located by staff and auctioned off there. Although I wasn't able to make the charity auction at BronyCon, I did hear a rumor that the cursed item made its way. Thanks to the winner for following through and ridding TrotCon of that cursed item! Closing ceremonies brought everyone in and for another year we said thank you and goodbye to our Guests of Honour, VIPs and Con Staff. The TrotCon theme for next year was revealed and I am excited to see what it will bring!

Thank you to everyone who made this weekend possible, and see you again next year!

Want a TL:DR? Here it is, if you haven’t (or have in the past), go to TrotCon, it’s awesome!

[jungkookienoona]

The Meme and His Tutor

Part 27: The Day Awkward Questions Were Asked

Co-written with @tragicshadows​

Recommended Song: Dimple by BTS (Vocal Line sub-unit)

|All Chapters|Masterlist|

Summary:

Jungkook finally tells you what's been bothering him and you both reveal more than you expected to.

Genre: Fluff, comedy

Pairing: Jungkook X Reader (Y/N)

Warnings: Swearing

Word Count:  2959

Length: 27?

The clock was mocking you. It had been twenty minutes since Jungkook had messaged you to see if you were free to Skype, and after confirming your lack of plans he said he would give you a call. He must've been held up with something. He was always so busy lately that you wouldn't be surprised if he hadn't even made it back to the dorm yet.

You sighed and slumped in your seat. Patience had never been your strong point but you were working on it. Deciding not to bore yourself by staring at a screen you got up to make a hot drink. The question was what did you make? You grabbed the tub of hot chocolate powder and noticed you probably had just enough for one mug. Decision made.

You were just spooning the powder into a mug of hot milk when you heard the distinct ringing of a Skype call. Shit.

You tipped the powder directly from the container into the mug, stirring as you briskly walked over to your laptop and clicked accept.

"You really know how to time things don't you?" You chuckled.

"Well hello to you too." Jungkook grinned. He ran his hand through his hair while raising a curious eyebrow at you. "Did I interrupt something?"

You raised your mug, "I was making a drink."

He looked off camera then held up his own mug, "Snap! I have green tea but I'm guessing yours begins with hot and ends in chocolate."

You shot him a grin and took a sip of your chocolatey beverage. When you placed the mug back down Jungkook giggled.

"What?"

He gestured to the area above his upper lip, "Moustache."

You tilted your head in confusion. Moustache? What was he on about?

"Noona," he ducked his head, hand covering his mouth as he laughed. "You have a chocolate moustache. Wipe your mouth."

Oh…

You used the back of your hand to wipe your mouth, instinctively licking the chocolate from it.

Jungkook shook his head with an amused grin, "You really are a Kitten."

You poked your tongue out at him then shifted into a more comfortable position in your chair.

"Busy day?"

He wrinkled his nose. He could say you were a kitten all he liked, but he was definitely a bunny.

"A lot of meetings. A lot of talking."

"About the comeback?"

"Nope," He said, popping the P.

Your eyebrows knitted together in confusion as he ruffled his hair.

"Then why?"

"It's a surprise."

You couldn’t help the way your brows knitted together and your lips pressed into a firm line.

"Is this the same surprise you told me about or something different?"

His lips puckered in thought, "It's complicated."

Complicated? How could it be complicated?

"Noona... do you mind showing me your room?"

"Uuuuh... why?"

"You've seen my room. It's only fair."

You glanced over your shoulder and at your hastily made bed and the few items of clothing strewn over it. Eh, it could be worse.

"Um, okay."

Picking up your laptop with one hand and your mug in the other, got up from your seat.

"This is going to be a tad awkward since I have to use my laptop to show you around. And I have some boxes here and there."

"What's in the boxes?"

"Just stuff I won't be taking with me."

You placed your mug aside on your dresser and turned your laptop around so the camera faced outwards. Standing in the centre of the room, you slowly turned around on the spot to give Jungkook a full 360-degree tour.

"You've seen this wall in the background of our calls," you said pointing to the wall opposite your desk.

You heard what sounded like a notepad flipping open. Frowning, you continued to point out various items in your room from your merch collection to your single bed.

"Your bed is so small Noona."

"Well, I can't exactly afford bigger. And yours was the same size."

"Yeah, but you deserve bigger. I like my bed, less room means more reason to cuddle up."

He had a point; his bed was just the right size for cuddling. Which meant that yours was too. He laughed when you pointed it out to him.

"But I'm not there to cuddle you in it, Noona."

"Then come cuddle me," You mumbled earning a chuckle.

"If I could I would, Noona. Now, show me some more."

You quickly showed him the rest of your room before moving on to the rest of your small apartment. It was a stroke of luck that you even had a living room at all. Normally such cheap apartments didn't have one.

"Noona, I'm noticing a theme."

"A theme?" You paused in the doorway to your tiny kitchen.

"Ye, a lot of dark colours. I knew you liked dark clothing but didn't think your whole apartment would be mainly black, red and purple."

"Don't judge. They're my favourite colours."

He chuckled and you turned your laptop to face you. He was grinning, eyes smiling, as his chuckling continued but only slightly quieter.

"I don't laugh at you for your 24 white t-shirts. Don't laugh at me!"

"I'm not laughing at you Jagiya. It's just so adorable that you surround yourself with the colours you like."

"Surrounding myself with colours I don't like would make me miserable," You pointed out and walked back into the living room to take a seat on the sofa. "So that's basically it apart from my bathroom but you don't want to see that."

He seemed to write something down before looking at you with curious eyes, "Does your bathroom have a bathtub? I heard most English homes have a tub."

A longing sigh slipped past your lips.

"Sadly I don't. I've had nothing but showers for a year now."

He began writing again but you couldn't see what.

"What are you doing?"

His head snapped up. A pair of wide eyes peering back at you.

"Writing."

"It looks like you're taking notes."

He bit his lip, chewing on it slightly. In thought or out of nerves you didn't know.

"They say a person's home can tell you a lot about them. I wanna know Noona inside and out. I want to be a Noona Expert like Noona is a Kookie Expert."

You giggled, "Fair enough. Maybe one day I'll give you a quiz to see how much you've learnt about me."

He sat up a little straighter as if facing up to a challenge.

"And I'll pass with flying colours. Which reminds me..." He began to twiddle with the hem of his shirt, "Has Noona... has Noona ever had a boyfriend?"

Your smile dropped. You knew this day would come, it was better to tell him sooner rather than later.

"I've had a few... My longest relationship lasted two years. But that ended nearly two years ago now."

“Oh...well I guess you are older than me." He scratched the back of his neck. He hesitated as if wondering whether to continue on the subject.

"You can ask me questions, Kookie. I don't mind."

"Were they older than me?"

You nodded, "But they were all 97 liners like you. At first, I thought it was a curse that only younger guys liked me. Though I can't complain anymore now that I have you."

He smirked, seemingly proud of changing your mind.

"Golden Maknae powers."

You chuckled, "Don't get cocky. We've just started dating."

He sent you a wink, "You won't get rid of me. You're stuck with me."

"I've had a couple of guys say that before but obviously that wasn't true..."

"Those guys weren't me... why did your last relationship end?"

You hesitated before answering, wishing you had your hot chocolate with you.

"He... he cheated on me with a younger girl. His best friend's ex to be precise."

Jungkook tutted, "What a dick."

"Agreed."

"Cheaters are the ultimate assholes."

You couldn't help but be taken aback again by his swearing, laughing at his pissed off expression.

"Don't laugh, I'm being serious! What kind of asshole cheats on a Noona as smart and beautiful as you. A Noona so kind and caring she goes back to an abusive home every week to make sure her siblings are okay. He threw you away without a second thought and I hate it."

He ran a hand through his hair, not caring when it stood up on end in every direction.

"It was awful. But it was two years ago. You don't need to worry about me. I've got you now."

"Exactly. And you won't have to worry about me cheating or anything... I've been… having nightmares about you leaving me."

Your eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets. He was worried about you leaving him?!

"You're having nightmares about me?!"

He palmed his face and when he looked back up you could see the lingering exhaustion on his features.

"About you leaving me, us being separated or someone forcing us apart... It keeps happening and it's driving me insane."

You remembered back to a couple of weeks ago when Jungkook had refused to go to sleep while you were visiting your family. So that was why.

"I've been having nightmares too. Not about you or anything like that. They're more stress-induced."

"Is it uni?"

You nodded, "Mainly. So I know how you feel."

He sighed, "What do we do? I feel like I've tried everything. Even worked out before bed to exhaust me into sleeping but they won't stop."

You felt sorry for the poor boy. Even when exhausted he couldn't find peace. The was no doubt in your mind that the distance wasn't helping.

"I wish I could help..."

Jungkook perked up like he had an idea.

"Actually you can help, Noona. I slept peacefully when you sang to me."

"Do you want me to sing to you again?"

He nodded, "I could do the same for you if you want. Chubs told me you would sometimes listen to my covers at night or when anxious."

Since when were those two so friendly?

"When did she tell you that?"

"When I was writing your songs. She said it was a good idea because you liked to fall asleep to my voice."

You smiled, "Once I was having a panic attack and listened to your covers to try and calm down. I ended up becoming so calm I fell asleep."

He awed, lips lifting into a smile and revealing his dimples. You felt your chest tighten at just how adorable he looked. The things you would do to be back in his company so you could kiss those adorable cheeks of his.

"So it's settled. I'll sing you to sleep if you sing me to sleep."

"Deal."

Jungkook clapped happily, a habit you had found yourself picking up, then leant forward and kissed his camera. He sat back with a frown.

"It's not the same as kissing Noona."

"Kookie, you asked me if I had any previous relationships... have you had any?"

He scratched the back of his neck, "A couple but none that lasted long."

"Were they, like, in school or..."

You were a little unsure how to approach the topic of dating within the Idol universe. You'd heard rumours, read articles seen theory videos of other artists involved in relationship scandals and the like. Dating bans within companies were a thing and as far as you were aware BigHit didn't impose those rules on BTS.

A nervous chuckle sounded from him, "I had one in middle school and the other was back in Busan around the time of I Need U..."

The fancam of Hoseok asking what was tasty in Busan and Jungkook whispering something to him flashed through your mind. You found your cheeks heating up.

"Needless to say it didn't work out. We parted mutually and that was that. I haven't spoken to them since. I couldn't even tell you if they were in the country anymore."

You nodded along, "At least it was mutual."

Jungkook shifted in his seat, "Yeah. There is one thing I want to ask you but it may be way too soon..."

You wondered what constituted as too soon. Marriage? Children? Meeting his parents?

"What is it?"

"Uh..." he dropped his gaze to his hands that once again picked at the hem of his t-shirt. "Since you were in a relationship for a while I was wondering if you...umm, you know...ever-"

"-had sex?"

His face turned beet red, even the tips of his ears.

"Y-yeah. That."

You giggled at his embarrassment.

"It is a little soon to ask but yeah… I ended up losing my virginity to him 2 weeks into the relationship. My friends had convinced me that the sooner you put out the longer the relationship lasts but clearly that wasn't true."

He gave a small chuckle, "That seems like really bad advice."

"Definitely was. I don't recommend it."

He hummed in agreement. "We've technically been dating for over two weeks anyway so..." He gave you a little cheeky smile before glancing back down at his lap.

Good thing you didn't have your drink with you otherwise you would've choked on it.

"We've been dating for over a month now. And as much as I love your thighs I don't think I will be putting out at all."

He shrugged, "That's fair. It wouldn't be fun unless Noona was entirely comfortable with it."

You opened your mouth to suggest changing the conversation topic when a thought came to mind.

"Since we're on the topic and you asked me...can I ask you the same question?"

He became a spluttering mess, hands coming up to hide his face which was once again turning red. An evil grin spread across your face.

"You haven't, have you? You're still a virgin."

More spluttering.

"You don't have to be so shy around me, Kookie. It's not like it matters."

He let out a long groan, sagging his shoulders and spreading his fingers to peer at you through them.

"It's embarrassing."

"And why's that?"

Finally, he uncovered his face to rest his hands on the table.

"Because I've done the other stuff just not full blown sex. And I see what people say. People think I'm not a virgin because of my looks or because of how well I grind on a floor!”

"And the hip thrusts." You added quietly.

He stopped to give you an unimpressed look. You muttered an apology and gestured for him to continue.

“It makes me self-conscious. I don't like it. Being on stage and doing all that stuff is a performance. I'm dancing. Doing the...actual do is different."

He had a point there.

"Does that mean the fans that treat you like a naive child make you more comfortable?"

He shook his head.

"It's annoying to be treated like a child at all because that's what I was when they met me. I know I say I have the mind of a minor but I didn't mean it that way."

"You want them to see you for who you are, not who they think you are based on the way you act on stage."

He hummed in agreement.

"I know it's hard because there's such a distance between ARMY and me, but I try to be as honest as I can when doing Vlives so they have a better idea of who I am."

He yawned and stretched causing you to look at the time. It was late. Really late. Shit.

"You should go to bed. We can start our deal now."

He tiredly nodded and stood up, interlocking his arms over his head and stretching again.

"I'll go change."

He tilted his own laptop screen slightly so you could only see a sliver of his room but what you could mainly see was a keyboard. While he was busy you got up and grabbed your hot chocolate, a pout forming when you realised it had gone cold. You could microwave it later, though.

You sat back down and waited for him to reappear. When he did you noticed the lights were off apart from a desk lamp. He was in a loose t-shirt and shorts that looked far more comfortable to sleep in than the shirt and jeans he was wearing previously.

He set the laptop down on the bed like last time and climbed between the sheets. He reached behind him and produced a little ginger cat that made your face light up.

"Honey!"

He nodded and nuzzled the plush toy.

"Noona, do you mind if I request a song?"

"I don't mind, BunBun."

"Could you sing 2U?"

You smiled and nodded, remembering back to the Spotify playlist he made you that had his own cover of the song.

"Close your eyes and dream about all the fun things we did on my last trip."

"Mhm, I love you." He mumbled before closing his eyes.

"I love you too," you said then cleared your throat and began to sing.

Good thing you didn't drink that much hot chocolate or your vocals would've been ruined. You watched as he drifted off to sleep, the day's stress fading off his features. His light snores caused you to smile gently.

A sneaky thought crossed your mind and you quickly took a screenshot of him sleeping before ending the call. You still couldn't quite believe that he had been hiding his nightmares from you. Admittedly, you had been too. But his were about you. Losing you, to be exact.

Jeon Jungkook was worried about losing you, the person that no one in the world seemed to want. And for once, you felt special.

[piratejeni]

How to Choose your First Tarot Deck

Choosing your first tarot deck can be a daunting task.  There are SO MANY out there and it seems like every day, someone is making a new one.   When I got my first deck, it was 1987-ish and the internet wasn’t born yet.  I lived in a rural area and my access to anything other than Waldenbooks was very limited.  Now, anyone can easily design a deck, have it printed, and market it.  AMAZING.

I didn’t even choose my first deck.  It was a Christmas gift when I was a teenager and I’m embarrassed to say that I don’t remember if it came from my mom or my grandmother.  One of the two, anyway.

My first deck was the Mythic Tarot which is loosely based on the Rider-Waite-Smith deck (RWS).  The Mythic Tarot takes it’s inspiration from Mythology which is pretty cool, but also very specific to those stories.  Many of the cards are similar in imagery to the RWS, but not in meaning.   The book was very detailed into things like “this bird symbolizes Zeus… and this Devil is actually Pan… oh and this lady here?  this is Persephone.”  Cool, but difficult to read if you try to shoehorn the images and symbolism into modern day life. It can be done, for sure, but it requires a LOT of memorization.

The Mythic Tarot: the Devil, The Heirophant and the Chariot.

  The Mythic Tarot: Ace of Pentacles, Six of Swords, Five of Wands and Eight of Cups

As you can see from these images, they are pretty specific to individual personas.  There is Persephone there in the Eight of Cups.  Yes, her leaving the physical word behind and moving into the darkness does sort of mirror the idea of the Eight of Cups so that’s good.   Poseidon is the Ace of Pentacles, which I personally find confusing because Pentacles is traditionally the Earth Element and Poseidon lives in the water.. but sure.. bursting forth with new energy.. ok.  The Six of Swords here is Orestes who I know nothing about.. and the Five of Wands is Jason’s battle with the Dragon over the Golden Fleece so, yeah, it’s a fight.

But, basically, there is too much here for a beginner, in my opinion.

Seriously Consider the Rider Waite Smith in the Yellow Box

The RWS (unless you read Thoth) is what a lot of decks are based off and the beauty of the RWS deck is that it lends itself to an intuitive interpretation.  The cards evoke an emotion and a feeling and provide a lot of detail to explore so you don’t have to learn something by rote.

Rider Waite Smith

Rider Waite Smith

See how the Five of Wands is evoking an emotion of conflict among people?  And the Six of Swords feels like a family leaving the choppy waters headed towards smoother sailing?  (Yes, the Ace is hard to get an emotion from.. I know.. but you have keywords to fall back on to kick your intuition into gear ~ it’s a good idea to know the “traditional meanings” but don’t be limited by them.  Think of it like the drugs that were prescribed for depression also work for smoking cessation.  They were intended for one thing but also work for another..  follow me?)

A word on intuition:  if you want to be a tarot reader  it really benefits you to work with your intuition. It gets your left brain out of the way and opens you up to the message from the Universe. The Tarot is a TOOL to facilitate your connection to the Information Highway. (and it’s not as old as people claim.. at least not as a divination tool)

The RWS is a great place to start.  The other thing is that a LOT of books, teachers and websites reference it.  If you will be looking for support from others, it’s good to have a working knowledge of this artwork. Also, I can’t help it.  The wands look like giant penises to me.  They just do.  Take a look at the Ace of Wands and then tell me I’m wrong.

Look at a lot of decks to find artwork that appeals to you

I don’t enjoy the RWS artwork and I really don’t like the overt Christian overtones.  I think it’s super important to find artwork that appeals to you.  It’s difficult to find the message in the card when you don’t like looking at it.  I actually got rid of my first RWS deck because I just couldn’t read with it.  (I have since purchased a new one to work with for study only.  But I have no intention on reading with it)

The deck I worked with for YEARS was the Morgan Greer.  It’s a close up image of the RWS artwork and it’s borderless, which I enjoy.

Morgan Greer

Morgan Greer

But still, lots of Christian overtones.  Since the explosion of Tarot interest, I’ve had some great opportunities to get decks that are still RWS based but with a twist.

Modern SpellCasters Tarot

Modern SpellCasters

Check out the Chariot!  Talk about moving forward without really knowing where you are going… but doing it anyway.  And there are more Alchemical symbols here and the deck has more of a magickal feel to it. Which is intentional since it’s meant to also work Magick.  And the Eight of Cups has a slightly different vibe to it. I also love this deck because many of the images show people of different colors, sizes, races and sexual identities.

Modern images for modern times can sometimes read easier.

This is my newest deck for my collection and it totally updates the images.  This is the Everyday Witch Tarot and I’m really digging how easy this is to read.   You may not feel that all of these images are modern (cloaks, cauldrons etc) but they are a lovely mix of Modern images and NeoPagan Traditions.  This deck just sings to me because of this mash up.  I suspect there is a modern deck out there for you that fits your path.  (Some of us do have actual magick brooms and wands and cauldrons in our homes.)

Everyday Witch Tarot

Everyday Witch Tarot

New Readers should probably avoid decks with pips

Tarot was a game, originally.  If you go back to before the RWS deck, you will find the Visconti Deck  named after the family that had the cards.  See, paper was expensive so only rich people had decks and only rich people had time for actual games.   I picked up this mini deck at the J.P. Morgan Library gift shop, where you can view three of the original Tarot cards from this deck.

I don’t read with it.

Visconti Deck

Pips Only.. you can’t even really tell the swords from the wands

These decks don’t give you anything to work with other than numbers.  That’s more than half your deck that you would need to memorize meanings for.  Not an easy task and not really an intuitive task either.

Probably steer away from Novelty Cards/Promotional Material for your first deck.

Have you seen Penny Dreadful? Vanessa has a beautiful deck that was made just for the show.

I own it.  I don’t read from it.

Penny Dreadful Tarot

Penny Dreadful Tarot

It’s amazing but limited in it’s ability to spark intuition. Also, all the minor cards 2-10 are pip cards. Nope. Just really neat to have it and look at it. (And I will admit that I’m currently waiting for my Twin Peaks Tarot deck to ship and I probably won’t read from that one either).

Which brings me to..

Probably best to avoid highly stylized/non-human decks to start.

There are some great non-human decks out that that probably read just fine.  But they can be hard to read for beginners and can feel a bit off putting to friends you may want to read for as practice.  Let’s face it. Some people still think the Tarot is Evil with the Capital E.  I adore my Deviant Moon deck but I’ve only used it once in a reading for a client because.. well… look at it.

Deviant Moon Tarot

Deviant Moon Tarot

The only time I used it for a client was when they made a point of telling me they identify as non-binary and most decks are well.. Binary.   And actually a lot of decks are very…. white.. and straight.  Many of the images in the Deviant Moon deck are not gender specific.  (I admit, I didn’t pick the best cards to demonstrate this but I was rolling with a theme)

Where do you go from here?

I think the best thing you can do is to get your eyes on some decks before you decide.  Some great places to look at decks before you buy are:

Your local metaphysical shop: Sometimes the owners will have decks open for you to look at. This is fantastic!  But buy your deck there, ok?  Don’t fondle the merch and then get a deal online.  Spend the extra bucks to support your local seller.

Aeclectic Tarot :  An astonishing number of decks with a good sampling of each card in each deck.  Plus reviews from actual readers.

YouTube:  A google search for YouTube Tarot Reviews will get you a ton of hits and a lot of folks will show you every single card.  You will also get a lot of info about things that might be important to you like, card stock or boxes or the book that comes with it.

Amazon reviews:  lots of readers will put pictures of the cards in their reviews and are not shy about sharing their thoughts. (which reminds me.. I have a few reviews to do)

Other readers:  Opinions are like assholes.  We all have one.  What I think about a particular deck may be very different than what your friend and favorite reader thinks. Ask us. We LOVE to talk about our decks.

It is impossible to buy the “wrong” deck.

Truly.  Every deck will tell you something about yourself.  It will help you find what you are comfortable with and what you aren’t comfortable with.  Discomfort is educating in and of itself.  If you outgrow your deck or decide you don’t want to read from the one you bought, there is a healthy market out there for second hand decks.   Many of us pooh pooh the idea that you shouldn’t read a used deck.  If you really want to unload a deck you don’t like, someone will buy it.

What it really comes down to is this…

Buy the deck that speaks to you .. and if it doesn’t speak to you in six months, that’s ok too..  See, people evolve.  What you like today, you may not like tomorrow.  And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.  Your time with the Tarot will change your perspective on things..  on people.. and on yourself.

How to Choose your First Tarot Deck was originally published on Jeni Reads Tarot