#Yeah I've made a couple of these that should be a tag lol

[phoenixcatch7]

Ladies and gentlemen please welcome to the stage my newest hero forge model!

Good grief this colour scheme fought me.

This is an au (?), a crossover between ff7 and Belle/The Dragon and the Freckled Princess, which takes place half in reality, and half in a futuristic virtual world simply called U, where the main character (Belle) debuts as a singer as a way to process the trauma of her songwriter mother's death. The technology of U enables it to create virtual avatars that 'draw out the user's hidden strengths', whether they like it or not.

As you might have guessed, this is what a young sephiroth stumbles upon, finding an escape from the labs and something captivating he's never heard before - music.

The vr world is always something that's absolutely fascinated me, and the expressive, vibrant, community based world in belle is really different to the normal scifi dystopian armpit of society that it often gets presented as, so of course I loved it immediately. Much closer to the real world comparison of vr chat than what the scifi novels present it as XD.

But the themes of escape and being thus able to process trauma is something else, that I really wanted to explore with sephiroth. I've made a couple of aus already, but this is the first one I've knuckled down and designed.

It's a pretty young sephiroth, starting just before/at the start of ever crisis and the wutai war, but in U he's aged up just enough for people to let him roam unsupervised, as it seemed to do for belle. I'm thinking late teens/vaguely androgenous first year at uni kid.

I made the build a lot slimmer and a bit shorter than his adult self, and all round a much less intimidating figure, less passively scary and off putting. Give this kid a chance to not stand out so immediately. And with the themes of finding yourself, processing trauma, I thought it'd be very interesting to think about how that might present, as reclaiming bodily ownership and autonomy. To this end, I added the tattoos, the sleeve on the arm (I was thinking a wing or animal? But I like the vague patterns, the tattoos most meaningful part is its existence as decoration), and the face markings as a nod to the original belle, who becomes an aunt/mentor figure during the story. And a piercing or two and a couple rings 🤭

The black and white hair, because I couldn't bear to get rid of the white entirely (and he should own it) and as an idea of what his hair might have been without jenova cells - both hojo and Vincent have black hair. Tied back a li'l fancy so he can have some pride and effort in his appearance, expose his face a little more without hiding it behind those awful bangs. I imagine it longer than the model goes, but eh. The eyes... I dithered over slits, or blue eyes, but in the end green is just his colour, you know? But a way to escape those unique pupils, the inhuman, the strange ones, I imagine it's something young him would jump at the chance for. Just to be normal.

The wings, they represent the wings of his safer/seraph true form, with that purple stripe rather than the fade but hero forge doesn't do wing patterns (yet) :(. Coming out of his lower back rather than his ribs like his black wing does, I'd put more but his hair needs some presence XD.

The outfit was a TRIAL but we got there. I wanted something modern and sorta k-pop young idol, but practical to fit his standards. I eventually managed something that struck that balance, I'm a lot happier with it than I thought I'd be! It's something you could see simultaneously on a strobing stage and on a final fantasy battlefield lol. Please imagine as many belts as you want! The headpiece thing is supposed to be one of those head mics, but it didn't convey the vibes so I gave him a proper mic as a prop ^^.

If you look at the gloves (white to og sephiroths black) - and the pendant - you'll see tubes of mako coming in and out of his arms. This is a nod to the fact that he (is heavily traumatised and objectified) was, as far as he knows, made up of mako, a weapon, a tool, made to find the promised land of infinite mako for shinra, charged up with it like a battery, woven into his dna, more cyborg robot than human all his life in the sterile labs. Again, it's ✨self expression through acknowledging and processing trauma✨

I'm also sooooo delighted with the face, the expression, I really am!! I wanted to try and capture a muted wonder and triumph, a brightness in the eyes. He's just performed his first proper song to the roaring applause of the crowds, proving his worth on his own without the labs, without slaying hundreds for a war other people believe in. He's built an identity outside of shinra, and it's good.

I tried to make it look like young sephiroth kinda sorta, but I'm face blind so if you've read this far, tell me how I did XD?

[haikyuuhoo]

tired eyes

pairing: gojo x reader

wc: 790

warnings: light angst, minor manga spoilers

a/n: tagging @shotorus in this bc sel your sleepy gojo thoughts made me unable to stop thinking about this idea I've wanted to write. I know this is so different to the vibes of what you were talking about but I figured you deserved the tag since this lil drabble finally made its way out of my head bc of you <3 (pls don't feel like you need to read this I'm nervy just tagging you lol)

Gojo’s keys clang loudly against the bowl on the table in the entryway, and he has half a mind to cringe at the noise, seeing as it’s so late and you’re probably asleep by now. He unzips his jacket as he drags his feet in the direction of the bedroom, heaving out a sigh and finally letting his shoulders relax a little, letting some of the tension he’s been harboring for days leave his body. He's so tired that he feels like he could fall asleep in his clothes without even crawling beneath the duvet, though he knows he should at least shower first. But that's all forgotten when he steps into the warm glow spilling into the hallway from the light on your nightstand, and he hesitates for a moment when he notices that you're not asleep—in fact, you're very much awake, like you've been waiting for him.

Your gaze darts up when you see the figure in the doorway, a smile immediately lighting up your face. “You’re home,” you say as you set aside the book you were reading and pull your headphones off.

Gojo raises an eyebrow, making his way to the edge of the bed where you rise onto your knees to meet him. “You’re still up?”

And you nod, shrugging one shoulder slightly as you bring your hands up to cup his face. “Of course. Can’t really sleep well when I’m waiting for you to come back from a mission, ya know?” You say it so casually, but it makes him frown knowing you’re referring to the nineteen agonizing days he was gone from you. You lean in to close the distance between you two, pressing your lips to his in a hungry kiss that has him grasping your waist and pulling you flush against him.

“Well, as much as I wish you wouldn’t stay up just for me, I’m glad you did,” he murmurs into your mouth.

“Mmm,” is all you hum in response, pushing your fingertips underneath his blindfold. And then you kiss his nose, then his forehead, and then briefly his lips again.

And those lips fall into probably the prettiest pout you’ve ever seen. “You gonna take it off?” he asks, his voice low, and normally the tone would have you moving quickly to take everything off of him, but not tonight. Tonight, his voice is low with exhaustion, and you'd noticed the way it seemed to seep into his bones the moment he entered the room.

“No,” you say softly, and he nearly whines, “you’re tired. Your eyes—” You gently let your fingertips smooth across his eyelids over the blindfold “—I’m sure they need the rest.”

Gojo had a penchant for coming home with migraines after missions, all that time with his blindfold off to help him fight draining him and making his eyes even more sensitive than normal, and you’re sure tonight is no different.

“But I want to see you.”

The corner of your mouth tilts up. “I may not know exactly how your technique works, Satoru, but I know you can see me.”

And this time he does whine, squeezing your waist and pressing his forehead against yours. “You know it’s not the same. I wanna see you.”

You hum, stringing him along like you’re thinking about it and toying with the edge of the black fabric. “Okay,” you finally say, “just a peek, yeah?” Before he even has a chance to respond you're lifting it off and dropping it to the side. His hair falls around his face, messier than it normally is, and you gently brush it back.

Gojo blinks a couple of times to adjust his eyes to the light, and your chest tightens at the sleepy smile he gives you, at the way his eyes seem dimmer than usual. “Hi,” he whispers.

And you’re suddenly overcome with a wave of emotion that has you blinking back tears. “Hi.” You cup his face again, thumbs stroking over his cheekbones. “I missed you.”

He flashes you a grin. “Aww, no need to miss me too much, you know I can’t stay away from you.”

And you both know it’s his attempt to lighten the mood, to pretend that someday there's going to be a time when you’re not waiting up for him, when you can be at peace despite knowing his responsibilities will always take him away for days at a time, when he's not carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders—when there's not a very real possibility that someday he may not come home to you.

So you decide that today you two will pretend, and you let your tears fall, giving him a wobbly smile. “I know.”

reblogs & comments always appreciated <3

[vaaaaaiolet]

It's the RPD's annual Secret Santa, and Leon's at his wit's end finding the perfect gift for his work crush. No competition, of course, except for the part where you make him promise not to bring something lame. Leon's got a week. He can do this. Right?

gn / m, fluff, romance, humor, leon is a SWEETHEART, you guys work at the RPD but you're leon's senior and also love reading??, no outbreak, inspired by the teapot episode of The Office lol, tw: claustrophobia

word count: 1.5k // read on ao3

a/n: vivi try not to mention christmas challenge go!!! @k1ssaphobe this one's for you <3 literally the ugliest effing banner i've ever made i'm SO SORRY but this completely destroyed my writer's block. i had so much fun <3

It’s all been downhill since Leon plucked your name out of a glass jar last week. Shit. Multiply that times three, rain down a couple red and green sprinkles for holiday spirit, and you have a great representation of how prepared Leon feels about being assigned the most crippling crush he’s had since high school for the RPD’s annual Secret Santa: you. 

Shit, indeed.

His hands shake like tremolo as he rereads your name printed on his little slip of paper, and Leon decides right then and there that the best way to go about this is to not go about it at all. Plain and simple. 

“Aren’t you excited?” you gush after your turn to draw from the jar. Poor you, you’d taken his jittery hands as enthusiasm. 

Leon grins tightly. “For sure, yeah, I um… I love Christmas. Really excited. You get who you wanted?” 

“Hey, no cheating. Not even with me, rookie.” You scrunch your face, clutching your paper to your chest. “Secret Santa’s secret. But it’s no secret that you’ve got to give it your all, so no lousy gifts allowed, got it?”

Well, there’s that plan gone. It’s back to police academy basics: Keep It Simple, Stupid. 

There’s nothing to overthink about making a good impression as the newest RPD recruit, Leon gaslights himself while haunting the Target holiday aisle on Monday night. You routinely save him from Irons’ infamous wrath, so it’s only natural that Leon spends all of Tuesday in a stupor at his desk, definitely not thinking of how he could never pay you back the favor with a silly Secret Santa gift. 

Wednesday rolls by and his coffee from yesterday sits in the break room, cold and overstirred next to today’s breakfast crumbs. How many times has Leon watched you sip tea at your desk? Five, six? 

Your eyes sparkle over the rim of your cup when he asks you about your weekend. Really, he doesn’t get the hate for small talk. There’s nothing small about the smile that bunches up your cheeks when he cracks a stupid joke about the weather, and more often than not, Leon finds himself waterboarding his notes app with the names of all the novels you drop mid-conversation so he can binge their Sparknotes over the weekend. So it goes, according to Kurt Vonnegut.

Ugh, he should have paid more attention in English. What the hell is an allegory anyway? Leon spends all of Thursday browsing your Goodreads profile and wracking his head over the hefty price tags attached to your TBR list. His wallet makes for a terrible wingman. 

But really, finding the perfect gift is no sweat at all. Leon is absolutely nonplussed (according to his 50th vocabulary-related Google search) when he steps into the RPD elevator on Friday morning with a clumsily wrapped, candy cane-striped bundle in his arms. 

“Hold it plea- Leon!”  

Liar, liar, pants on fire – he’s totally shitting his pants when you barely make it inside before the doors snap shut. 

“Thanks,” you gasp. 

Leon nods stiffly, his cheeks growing warm, and jams the second-floor button with his knuckle.

As the elevator starts its maddeningly slow climb, you hum, rocking back and forth in your snow boots. You’re cradling a package of your own, something four-cornered and fairly small. Leon, however, feels like he’s holding a bomb, the object of his affections standing less than three feet from his radius of destruction. How are you so carefree right now? You’ve probably got this gifting thing in the bag and he most definitely doesn’t. 

Leon can see everything unfold the moment he enters the office. You’ve had your gift planned months beforehand, his gift is going to be horrifically lame when you open it, everyone’s going to clap politely but you’re going to hate him forev-

And then the elevator plunges into pitch black.

“Oh my god!” 

Who screamed louder, Leon doesn’t want to find out.

The elevator shudders to a complete stop. Leon’s mental spiral of doom helpfully supplies him with an image of you two dangling in midair, suspended on wires. Maybe this is the universe saving him from delivering the worst Secret Santa gift of his life.

Leon blinks in the darkness, waiting for your unflappable voice to cut through the silence and figure a way out, headstrong as always, except you don’t, and Leon strains his ears to hear what’s surely not what he thinks it is, a whisper that sounds an awful lot like: “Leon, I don’t want to die.”

“What?”

“We’re gonna die,” you whimper. “I don’t wanna die.”

Your voice floats up from a lot lower than he remembers your head being, so he crouches down to find you with your arms hugged to your chest. You’re huddled against the wall, breathing all shallow. The package in your arms lies forgotten somewhere in the abyss.

“Hey, hey, nobody’s dying.” Leon reaches out to find your hand. “What’s the matter?”

“I have, cl-clau-”

“Claustrophobia?” He remembers that one well. Wishes he didn’t. 

You nod fitfully.

“The dark doesn’t help either, huh?” he whispers, craning his head to look at the busted bulb on the ceiling. “Damn.”

Your palm grows colder and clammier in his hand by the minute, and the shakiness in your breathing is starting to worry him. Your head pops above your knees when you hear rustling in the shadows, and then the telltale Christmastime cacophony of wrapping paper being torn to shreds. 

“What are you…?”

“Being resourceful,” Leon grits, tearing his Secret Santa gift open. He fumbles with its contents for a second, slipping something into a plastic compartment. “It’s not the best, but…”

The elevator blooms with soft, golden light.

“...it’ll do.”

“What’s this?” you murmur in awe, cupping your hands around the tiny book light Leon holds. 

“My Secret Santa gift,” he chuckles sheepishly. “I kind of, um, blanked. I’m also really bad at giving gifts, so there’s also this,” he says, pulling out a mug from the heap of trashed wrapping paper.

When I Think About Books, I Touch My Shelf, it announces with impunity. 

Leon blushes when you giggle at the inscription. Things always look better online than in person, rookie mistake. But at least you’re breathing better now. 

“This is amazing,” you laugh, cradling the cup like there’s warmth inside. 

“Not so amazing now that I’ve opened all the packaging.”

“Your Secret Santa won’t mind at all, trust me, not with a gift like this- ‘touch my shelf’, you’re unbelievable! Tell me where you got it.”

He shakes his head. 

“Leon Scott Kennedy, if you don’t stop gatekeeping this incredible mug and this super useful book light, by the way, I’m going to tell Irons you spilled coffee all over his desk. I can be very convincing, y’know.” You cross your arms decidedly, waiting. 

“There’s no need for all that!” he protests. 

“That was a promise, Leon, not a threat.”

“C’mon, be reasonable here.”

“You’re still not telling me.” 

“It’s for you, silly.” Leon tilts his head, face heating up faster than the book light bulb, “You’re my Secret Santa.” 

He must be hallucinating the pink in your cheeks.

“Oh,” you breathe. 

“Yes, oh,” Leon teases, scooching to sit next to you. “I couldn’t think of anything,” he confesses, “so I just went with the basics. I know you read and I know you really miss your old tea mug, the one that broke, right? You’re my gifting competition and I got nervy from how sure you were about your person’s gift. So, um, I played safe.” Leon finishes lamely and squeezes his eyes shut, hoping the light doesn’t also illuminate the shame radiating from his body. 

And then he feels the press of an unbelievably soft kiss on his cheek.  

“It’s much better than what I’ve got,” he hears. 

His eyes fly open. Words don’t form right in his throat when you reach out for the package you dropped when the lights went out. Wrapping paper falls apart neatly in your hands (what don’t you do perfectly?) and you unveil a mini waffle iron, proportioned perfectly for somebody always running late without breakfast. Somebody like Leon.

“You keep missing breakfast and Irons is on my ass about saving you food all the time, so I guess took the practical route too,” you shuffle your feet, bashful all of a sudden. “And um, my gift’s kind of useless if we never make it out. Sorry.”

He fingers the tag in wonder. 

Merry Christmas, Leon! There’s a timer so you don’t burn them :) xoxo, your Secret Santa!

You’re so goddamn sweet. You’re perfect and thoughtful and it’s all your fault that Leon didn’t have the faintest clue what to give you. Think, Leon, think. He knows he’s not this stupid. What do you give to somebody who has everything? 

A kiss. One that’s all smiles and just as sweet as the way you kiss him back, because screw Secret Santa.

It’s hard to keep secrets when you’re Leon’s favorite one.

psst, find more of my work here!

comments and reblogs are very much appreciated <3 take care and i love you!

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

The Dangers of Hope Ch. 7

Series Summary: When Y/N shows up at Camp Chitaqua with her little girl in tow, her bloodshot eyes leave no doubt that she's infected. Or is she? Everything Dean has come to know for certain over the last five hellish years, is about to be challenged.

Pairings/Characters in the series: Endverse!Dean x Reader, Emma (OFC), Castiel, Sam Winchester, Lucifer, Michael, Zachariah, Risa, Johnston (OMC), Patrick (OMC), Theresa (OFC), other survivors and soldiers.

Series Explicit 18 +/Warnings: Show level violence, some gore, angst, smut, fluff all the usual for a series of mine. ❤️ Endverse!Dean (that's a warning for his anger and callousness as well as his extreme hotness. 😁) Each chapter will have their own specific warnings.

Chapter Warnings: Angst, bit of smut.

Word Count: 4,813

A/N: So, I've had this idea for quite a while. Basically since I watched The Last of Us. I loved Pedro in the role of Joel, but I kept thinking how incredible Jensen would have been. Which then made me think of how amazing he was as Endverse!Dean which then led me to this idea. Lol! I've stolen the premise of Ellie's storyline from TLOU, but made her a grown up, a reader insert, and a love interest for Dean.

If you've never seen TLOU, don't worry - you don't need to have seen it to understand this story. 😊

I've taken some liberties with the Endverse in my story, changed a few things from canon, but kept lots of things too.

I sincerely hope you enjoy the story. It will be ten chapters and I will do my very best to post one chapter every weekend. ❤️

A/N 2: Chapter 7 has arrived. 😊 I hope you enjoy it! Thanks so much to everyone who has been reading, liking, commenting and reblogging this series! It means SO much! ❤️

Series Master List || Main Master List || Tag Lists

The dividers below were created by @saradika

Three and a half weeks later

“And these would be beside every tent?” Dean asked Brandy as he looked at the rough drawings she’d made of her latest idea.

She nodded. “Yeah, on the West side of every tent. It would mean families don’t have to come to Food Storage every few days for more rations, and once the deep snow comes that’s gonna be a huge benefit for folks. Plus it’s easier for people to plan ahead and stretch their food if they have two weeks worth of rations sitting outside their tent. I mean, it won’t work once spring comes, but that’s a problem for spring.”

Dean nodded. He looked at their builders, the group of half a dozen survivors that were tasked with providing new buildings and necessities as the camp required. They’d built the sheds earlier in the year, the chicken coop last summer and were currently finishing up a small barn for the cow.

“Is this gonna interfere with completing the barn?” He asked, nodding at Brandy’s drawings. 

One of the women, he was pretty sure her name was Vanessa, shook her head. “No, we’ll be finished with the barn in a couple of days, and be able to get Lily settled for the winter all snug, and then move on to the food sheds.” She looked at the drawing again and shrugged. “They’re small enough that we should be able to get them all done within a few weeks?” 

She looked to the rest of the builders who nodded their agreement.

Dean frowned. “Lily?”

Vanessa grinned. “Yeah, sorry that’s what the kids have dubbed our little cow. Y/N has them going to visit her once a week so Ralph can teach them about farming.” She said, referring to the old farmer who had helped to plant the winter vegetables.

Dean felt his stomach twist as it always did when someone brought up her name. But he just nodded. “Okay, good. Get started on the food sheds as soon as you’re able. The deep snow is gonna come in the next couple weeks. It’d be good to have them all done by then.”

They all gave a chorus of “Okay, Boss” or “Sure thing Boss” as they nodded and took their leave. They wrapped their scarves tight and pulled on their mittens. The deep snow may not have come yet, but the ground was layered in white, and winter was sharp and stinging in the late November air.

Brandy gathered up her drawings and was headed out when Dean called her back.

“Brandy?”

She turned back to him, an eyebrow raised in question. They'd never discussed their meeting in the cabin with Y/N, but he'd noticed a slightly colder demeanor from her lately.

And he knew why, of course. 

Brandy had been one of the original dozen survivors who had built the camp together. She'd been an incredible asset from the beginning, and they probably wouldn't have survived without her planning and strategies for running the camp. He and the soldiers may have kept the survivors alive, but Brandy kept them living by organizing and planning for their food and shelter. She was an invaluable member of the camp.

But three weeks ago he'd treated her like a servant meant to do his bidding. He knew he owed her an apology, but it had been so long since he'd apologized for anything that it stuck in his throat.

Now she contemplated him, waiting for him to speak, and he just nodded. He pointed towards her drawings. 

“This is a good idea.” He cleared his throat. “So, thanks.”

Brandy stared a moment longer before a small smile twitched at the corners of her mouth. She nodded.

“No problem, Boss. That's what we're all here for, right?”

Dean just nodded and she lifted her scarf over her face and left the big cabin where Dean conducted most of his business these days, since it was warmer than his tent and could fit more people.

As he ran a hand over his face, the door opened again and most of his soldiers tromped inside. They were there to talk about security and possible threats, but Dean immediately looked at Johnston. 

“Hey, did you tell her I want to see her?”

The thin man nodded vigorously. “Yes sir. I told her yesterday. Has…has she not come to see you yet?” He looked around the room as though Y/N might be hiding somewhere. 

Dean shook his head. “No, she hasn't.” He pointed towards the door. “So why don't you go get her and tell her I expect to see her now.”

Johnston looked wary and as though he definitely didn't want to follow that order. But when Dean just stared him down, he turned and left quickly.

The rest of his soldiers began giving their reports about any problems they were having at the outposts, like equipment that needed repair or items that needed replenishing. But Dean was only half listening; his gaze kept straying to the door, waiting for Y/N to show. 

Ten minutes later, Patrick was briefing him and Dean tried to focus on what he was saying. 

“Williams has seen the group twice now, but -” Patrick cut himself off as Y/N and Johnston pushed through the door.

Y/N smiled at the soldiers as she came in. “Sorry to interrupt, but apparently I was summoned.” 

She cut her glance to Dean and her smile turned brittle. 

“I was told you needed to see me.”

“Yeah, since yesterday.” Dean responded, hardening his voice in an attempt to not seem desperate, especially in front of his soldiers.

“Sorry. Busy.” Was Y/N's curt reply. “What do you need?”

Dean took a deep breath. “I just wanted to know how you're -” he altered his words, “your school, or, uh, the school was going?”

Y/N paused for a moment before answering with a shrug. 

“Fine.”

When it was clear that was all she was going to say, Dean scowled at her. “You wanna elaborate on that?”

She raised her chin a fraction. “Oh, I'm sorry, Boss, I don’t have anything else to say right now, but I’ll be sure to write out a full report for next week.”

Her eyes shot daggers that found their mark, bringing a pain to his chest that he felt a lot these days. He’d thought it might go away if he could talk to her, see her, but it was just worse with her there.

He shook his head. “That won't be necessary.” He said quietly.

“Anything else then, Sir?”

He'd never hated that moniker more. “No, that's it.” 

She spun on her heel and walked out of the cabin. Silence reigned when she left. Dean waved at everyone else. “We'll finish this another time.” When they didn't immediately move, he made his voice a bit sharper. 

“Dismissed.”

That got them moving and they all shuffled their way out the door - all except Risa. She closed the door behind her fellow soldiers and then turned back to face Dean. 

He caught her eye and lifted his hands. “What?”

She shook her head slowly. “You're such an idiot.”

Dean dropped his hands and raised an eyebrow. “Wanna try that again?”

Risa shook her head as she walked back to him. “No, I said what I said.” 

Dean gave her a look of annoyance as she reached him and leaned one hip on the table where he stood. She raised her hand to his cheek, her countenance softening. 

“I really wanted to be the one.”

Dean scowled in confusion. “The one what?”

Risa pushed her fingers through his short hair. “The one to make you smile.” There was a long pause between them and Dean had no idea how to respond to that. She shook her head and stood up straight, dropping her hand. “But, it was obviously meant to be her.”

Dean scoffed. “What are you talking about?”

“Y/N. You know I'm talking about Y/N.”

He gave a short burst of sarcastic, humorless laughter. “Yeah, right. You think Y/N's gonna make me smile? I've done nothing but pull my hair out since she got here, so ..” He trailed off and looked away from Risa's knowing gaze.

Risa nodded. “Yeah, cause you're an idiot.” She reiterated.

When he looked back at her, Risa was smiling softly and wistfully. “Apologize to her, idiot. Try to get back what you've nearly lost. She's pissed, don't get me wrong, it might take some real groveling on your part but,” she nodded, “she has a very kind heart, so she might forgive you. It's definitely worth a try.”

Dean stared at her for a moment before he looked down at the ground, conceding the truth in her words. “I don't know how to do it.”

Risa gave a gentle laugh. “You're a smart guy. Bet you'll figure it out.”

She put her hand on his cheek again, resting the other on his chest as she stood on tiptoe to reach his lips. She placed a light, lingering kiss there and then pulled away. 

“Goodbye, Dean.”

Dean felt a jolt of worry at the farewell. “You’re leaving? Am I losing a soldier?”

She smiled and shook her head. “No, the soldier is staying. I'm saying goodbye to the woman I wanted to be for you. And the man that she…cared about a lot. I hope he lets himself be happy.”

Dean frowned, feeling the weight of her goodbye, with all of its disappointed hopes. 

“Goodbye Risa.” He said, and knowing it wasn't enough, he cupped her cheeks in his hands and kissed her lips, light and brief. “Thank you…for being the woman you are.”

He thought he saw a glimmer of moisture in her eye, but she blinked it away quickly and pulled out from under his hands. She moved to the door in a few strides and, with one last smile thrown over her shoulder, she walked away.

***

That afternoon as the winter sun headed into the west, Dean made the decision to go talk to Y/N. This was ridiculous. They were a camp of less than 150 people, continuing to try and avoid each other was impractical.

He'd just go tell her that.

He walked to the school because she was usually still there this time of day. But when he got there, the schoolroom was empty. He looked around the space that he hadn't seen in over a month and had to shake his head.

What had been a cold empty shed not even three months ago was now a warm, inviting, cozy space. She'd had a little camp stove installed, and on the Northern wall, replacing the fall leaves that had been there, was a giant, beautifully sewn quilt. He recognized it as the same design as the one that hung in the big cabin. 

Hannah, who was Ralph-the-farmer's wife, had made it out of old scraps of material. It took a long time to gather enough scraps for a whole quilt so he knew this quilt probably took her months of hard work. But of course she'd gifted it to Y/N and the school. That's what Y/N brought out in people - hard work and generosity.

The small wooden table in the room had four chairs around it now and he wondered where she'd snagged the other two chairs. 

The kids’ blanket seating had been enhanced slightly with the addition of a few pillows, and on the western wall, beside the old map, two long, weathered planks of wood had been nailed in place to serve as bookshelves. The books he'd brought back had been placed lovingly on the shelves, not a single corner bent on any of them. 

He sighed at the changes and felt a warmth flare to life in his heart. Y/N did this too - seeming to warm the spaces around her without trying.

He walked out of the schoolroom and was just starting to walk back to his tent when he heard high pitched giggles coming from the side of the school just seconds before three small bodies hurtled forward, chasing and grabbing on to one another - Emma and her two little friends. He couldn't remember their names.

When they all saw him, the laughter fell away and Emma's eyes got wide, fear and suspicion filling them instantly. It felt like a punch when he remembered the way she'd climbed up on the chair beside him that one time, shy acceptance in her expression as she asked him to read to her.

He hated that she was so scared of him; he had to try and fix that much, at least. 

“Hi girls.” He said in what he hoped was a friendly sounding voice. Emma's friends nodded and waved at him slightly. But Emma stayed on high alert.

He looked at her two friends. “I need to talk to Emma, so you girls head on home now.” 

They looked to Emma who looked more scared than ever. But she whispered goodbye to them and they ran off.

Dean got a bit closer to her and went down on his haunches. He took a second to think what to say to her.

“You know, you don't have to be scared of me.”

“I'm not.” Emma said quickly while her big blue eyes were shrouded in fear.

Dean nodded. “Okay, good because…” He struggled to find the words that would help. “Cause I thought maybe I scared you a bit before. When I, uh, needed to talk to your mom alone.”

Emma nodded, the suspicion growing in her gaze. “When you were mad at Mommy.”

Dean shook his head. “No, I wasn't mad.” 

Emma gave him a look that said she didn't believe him and he conceded with a nod. 

“Okay, I was a little…upset, but I was just…confused. Eventually everything got figured out.”

She didn't say anything, clearly still highly skeptical. 

Dean took a deep breath and decided  to just go for it. “Anyway, I didn't mean to scare you and I'm…sorry about it.” He cleared his throat. “And I promise not to scare you like that again. Okay?”

Emma stared at him for a long time and he kept hold of her earnest blue gaze throughout her scrutiny. Slowly a smile spread across her face.

“Okay.” She said, accepting him at his word. “Then can you come over again for supper tonight? I can read a bunch of words now, mommy taught me in the books. So, I could help you read the story this time.”

Dean shook his head at the speedy ways of forgiveness in a child's heart, and for the first time in more years than he could remember, a small smile turned up one side of his mouth. 

He reached out to pat her cold cheek. “I'm not sure, kiddo. We'll have to wait and see.” Emma was about to argue the point but Dean stood up. “Now it's gonna be dark soon and it's way too cold for you to be out here without a scarf. Don't you have one?” He asked.

Emma nodded. “Yeah, but I don't like it. It itches.”

Dean hummed. “Ah, yeah wool does that sometimes.” He unwound his own scarf from around his neck.

“Here, I'll trade you.” He said as he wound the polyester scarf around her neck and up over her cheeks. “Now, you head home.”

Emma's eyes were bright and happy above her new scarf as she danced away, skipping through the light snow that blanketed the ground.

He watched her go for a moment before turning back to head home himself. But he stopped dead in his tracks as he saw Y/N standing in the path with an arm full of wood. Silence reigned for nearly a full minute. Finally he reached forward to take the wood, but Y/N shook her head.

“No, I’m fine.” She nodded toward the school. “Just stocking up for tomorrow.”

“Right.” 

More silence. Y/N’s voice was quiet when she finally spoke. “Thank you for the scarf. It’s been impossible to get her to wear one.”

He nodded and then realized something. “How long were you standing there?”

Y/N took a deep breath, answering on an exhale. “Since just before you promised my daughter not to scare the shit out of her again.”

Dean nodded and closed his eyes. “So, basically the whole time.”

“Yeah, basically.” She took a beat pause. “Thank you for that.” 

Dean nodded. She walked towards the school again but before she could close the door and shut him out, Dean called to her, knowing his voice sounded desperate.

“I needed to believe it.”

Y/N turned in the doorway, a frown on her face. “Needed to believe what?”

He took a step closer, feeling choked by all the words he wanted to say that wouldn’t form properly in his mind. Y/N stared at him for a moment more before huffing slightly and walking into the schoolroom. He followed her inside, closing the door against the wind as she dropped the pile of wood into a metal bucket by the stove.

When she turned back to face him, she was scowling. “Dean, I don’t know what you want here. What do you want me to say?”

He shook his head. He didn’t want her to say anything. He wanted to say things, so many things. “No, nothing.” He croaked out.

She crossed her arms over her chest, bunching up her too big jacket. “Then what are you doing here?”

He took deep breaths in through his nose, pushing the words out through a closed throat. “I needed to believe it.” He said again, quieter this time.

“Believe what?” Y/N asked in frustration.

He stepped close to her and she took a step back before refusing to retreat. He gazed at her and wished more than anything that she really could just see inside his head so he wouldn’t have to try and get it out.

But he looked at the ground quickly and then back at her. His breathing was slightly labored and his voice was thin as he spoke. “You’re so dangerous to me, Y/N.”

He knew he said the wrong words when her forehead wrinkled into a deep frown and she nodded. “Because - I’m a psychic monster? Or because I’m a croat? Why exactly am I dangerous this time?”

“Because you’re you.” Dean answered loudly, speaking over the end of her question. He sighed in frustration; he was getting all of this wrong. He looked up to the heavens, as though they could possibly help him, and tried again, speaking softer.

“I needed to believe that you could control my mind or my…my feelings because…” He trailed off and looked at Y/N hoping she’d just know what he was saying and finish the sentence for him. But she was still just frowning in confusion.

“Because,” he continued, “my feelings when I'm around you are…dangerous. For me, I mean, they’re dangerous. Y/N I can’t…” He shook his head. “The way you look at the world? And the way you change how I see it too? It’s so fucking dangerous.”

He waved his hand, trying to encompass everything. “This world is ugly and shitty, and fucking ended! We literally lived through the end of the world, and now all that’s left is this - this dark, violent, bullshit reality.” 

He shook his head and his voice was filled with awe. “Yet somehow you move through it like this,” again he struggled for the words to describe her, “like some kind of lighthouse, like a refuge for every cold, lost thing. And I - “

He cut himself off, not sure he was making any sense. But Y/N had stopped frowning and was now just contemplating him.

He shrugged. “And when I’m around you, I feel warmer than I’ve felt in years, brighter.” He shook his head and moved away from her, embarrassed by his confession and knowing he wasn't saying it right. 

He stared at the map as he spoke. “So, I needed to believe that the feelings weren’t real, that you’d just forced me to feel that way. Because if the feelings and thoughts you bring out of me are real?” His shoulders slumped. “God, I’m so fucked.”

He felt Y/N come up to stand just behind him on his right, but he stayed staring at the map as she spoke.

“Why? What’s so dangerous about warmth and light?”

His voice was barely audible as he answered slowly. “Because they bring hope. And hope is a lie. It’s a lie I believed for a long time, a lie I clung to. The lie of possibilities, of family, of good conquering evil. And when the lie was revealed and the world fell apart, the truth almost killed me.”

After a moment he turned to face her and felt his heart skip as he saw her expression of sadness and the tears that sparkled in her eyes, even in the growing dusk.

He lifted a hand to cup her cheek and thumbed away a tear as it fell over her bottom lashes. “And Y/N, if I allow myself to hope again, and it gets crushed by the world again…” He shook his head. “I won’t survive it, I know I won’t.”

He took a step closer to her and felt her warmth penetrating his cold bones. She grabbed his free hand and held it in both of hers as he dropped his other hand from her cheek.

“Or…” she said, her voice filled with conviction, “or we can both hope, both fight, and both win. Even if we never get big wins, the little ones still count. And they add up. Every day we’re here alive is a win. Every time we smile at someone and they smile back is a win. Every time the sun shines so bright you have to close your eyes, every time we hear Emma giggle, every time our stomachs are full, every time we do something to make our home here better - every small thing adds up to big wins.”

Dean shook his head. He knew that trying to resist the pull of her light and life was pointless; she’d been pulling him out of the dark, and changing his plans since the moment she’d come into his life. 

He used their connected hands to pull her tight against him and watched heat enter her beautiful, red-ringed eyes.

He bent his head, but before his lips touched hers, he whispered words that came much easier now. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. For all of it. I’m so sorry.”

Another tear fell down her cheek and she smiled and bit her lip. “If I say you’re forgiven will you kiss me?”

He pretended to mull it over and then nodded. “Yes, I think that’s fair.”

In the dusky twilight around them he pulled her close and pressed his lips to hers; his arms tightened around her as she moaned softly. 

He was definitely counting that sound as a win.

***

Over the next month Dean resumed his dinners with Y/N, the difference being that he was there nearly every night, and he’d stopped pretending to himself that he didn’t relish every moment with her and Emma. 

Over the evenings spent together, Emma had warmed more and more to him so that now she ran to meet him every time he walked through their tent flap, holding her arms up so he’d pick her up and toss her up into the air, catching her in a swooping motion as she came down. It made Y/N gasp every time, but Emma squealed with delight. He’d set her down and she’d grab his hand, nearly three times the size of hers, and pull him over to the table.

He’d take off his heavy canvas jacket within the relative warmth of the tent, and drape it over Emma’s shoulders, making her giggle as she drowned inside it. 

They’d sit around the table and share the day's events, though Emma usually did the majority of the talking. It always brought a mixture of feelings when he listened to her bubbly, excited stories. It made him happy and terrified at the same time. She was so precious he couldn’t help but smile, an expression that was becoming easier for him as the days went by. But also, his chest felt tight and he could feel terror creep in as the darkness whispered a warning, telling him that he couldn’t possibly keep her safe. He’d lose her, and Y/N too.

Sometimes that thought woke him from a deep sleep and made him shake and sweat. It was proving incredibly difficult to make all his fears go away. But as soon as he saw Y/N’s smile the next day, it felt easier.

In fact it was becoming increasingly difficult to go home at all, to leave her warm cozy tent and return to his dismal gray one. But they were trying to be careful and move slowly in deference to Emma. They didn’t want her to feel confused or unsure of things now that she finally seemed so at ease. 

So they hid their kisses and their caresses until after Emma was sleeping, at which point they’d usually try and brave the cold long enough to enjoy some alone time, even if it was encumbered by bulky jackets and scarves. They never had enough time, but they’d managed slightly more satisfactory make out sessions in the empty school and in Dean’s tent. But they were always too rushed and things had to end too quickly.

Dean ached for her more and more every day.

One evening in mid December, the air was much milder than usual; the day had been unseasonably warm and the night held on to a trace of it. Dean had Y/N pressed up against the side of the thick canvas tent, sucking on the soft skin just below her ear. As her breath caught and she angled her head so that he had better access, he was practically vibrating with how badly he needed to feel her. 

As he breathed into her mouth, he slowly unzipped her jeans, letting her tell him no if she wanted. But she just nodded and bit her lip.

He watched her face as he slipped his fingers under the waistband of the leggings she wore as an extra layer against the cold, and then down into her panties. He desperately tried to stifle the moan that wanted to escape as he felt how soaking wet she was for him.

“Goddamn.” He whispered roughly as he slid two fingers inside her, rubbing his thumb against her little bundle of nerves and making her bite harder into her lip to keep quiet. He decided to help her out and closed his mouth over hers, swallowing up her small moans.

He pushed in and out of her body, his cock hardening as she gripped his forearm where it disappeared into her pants while her cunt clenched tight around his fingers. He passed his fingers over her sweet spot a couple of times and she fell over the edge. She broke off their kiss to bury a scream in his neck, muffling it with his thick collar. 

As she came down she clung to him, her hot breaths creating puffs of white in the cold air. She moved her hand to cup his hard on through his jeans and was just reaching for his zipper when they suddenly heard Cas’ voice inside the tent.

“Emma, where is your mother and Dean?” 

Dean groaned. What the fuck? Y/N squeaked slightly and pulled her hand back, making him absolutely throb with need. He was gonna slaughter his best friend. 

They were quickly righting their clothing when Emma's voice reached them, and it didn’t really sound like she’d been sleeping.

“They’re outside the tent, kissing each other.”

Y/N’s eyes got huge and round and Dean stifled a snorted laugh behind his palm while she slapped his bicep. 

“It’s not funny. Jesus, we’re gonna traumatize her!” She said in a horrified whisper.

Suddenly Cas’ head poked around the side of the tent and he frowned. “Are you finished kissing?”

Y/N buried her head in Dean’s chest and Dean scowled at the angel. “Well, we sure as hell are now.”

Cas nodded, completely ignoring Dean’s frustration. “Good. You need to come inside. I have incredible news.”

Dean sighed and rolled his eyes. “What news, Cas?”

The angel’s smile was surprising in its rarity and it made Dean raise an eyebrow.

“I know why Y/N isn’t a psychic.”

Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters: @lyarr24 @lacilou @deans-spinster-witch @globetrotter28 @suckitands33 @akshi8278 @evznackles @jackles010378 @impala67rollingthroughtown @krazykelly @candy-coated-misery0731 @envyaurora95 @spnwoman @deans-baby-momma

Dean Fics Only: @roonthelittlespoon920 @slamminmine @zepskies @safiyas-world

Any/All Fics Regardless of Character or Fandom: @kazsrm67 @slut-for-evans-stan @sexyvixen7 @nancymcl @hobby27 @waywardcheshire

Everything Incl. Fan Edits: @k-slla @leigh70 @eevvvaa @kickingitwithkirk @foxyjwls007 @notinthislife50 @roseblue373 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @avanatural @mrsjenniferwinchester @all-alone-he-turns-to-stone @deangirl96

[bucktommyscones]

ohhhhh for the prompt thing can i see 30 or 49?

(also MY BAD i accidentally hit the unfollow/ follow button instead of the ask box 🙈🙈🙈)

lol, I was very confused. no worries!

Yes, I would love to! I'll do 30 now and 49 in a couple hours? I'm currently using my partner's computer and will be going home soon. 😊 I'll make sure to tag in you in that one too.

30-Being Protective

Buck really should have seen this coming, but at the time, when Gerrard had made the comment, he'd simply been venting to Tommy. But maybe this time was one vent too far because, a couple hours after he sent the text about Gerrard's latest bullshit, Tommy is striding into the station, a look of rage on his face like Buck's never seen before.

He gets in front of him, holding his hands up. "Tommy, babe-" but Tommy neatly sidesteps him and going clearly for the Captain's office (Buck and the rest of the team refuse to think of it as Gerrard's, no matter what the bastard says). Buck shoots a worried look at Eddie, Hen, Ravi and Chimney and they all follow Tommy.

"Hello, Kinard," Gerrard says in that oily, smarmy voice that Buck hates. He leans back in his chair and folds his hands on his stomach like this is the most comfortable he's ever been.

"You son of a bi-"

"Tommy, don't," Buck insists, laying a hand around Tommy's bicep. His muscles are wound tight. Tommy is in fight mode, flight nowhere in sight.

Gerrard stands, using his hands on the desk to lever himself up, a smug grin on his face. "What did you say to me, Kinard?"

"Leave him alone," Tommy says, voice hard and cool. "Leave them all alone."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Gerrard says, far too smoothly for Buck's liking and he's right. Every little comment or dig, everything he does is never outrightly offensive. But they never leave room for much doubt. They're working on collecting evidence but they just don't have enough yet.

"I'm sure," Tommy bites out. "But I promise you, one more, one more time I'm told about something you've done to him or said, or implied something, I don't give a shit about my career. You will see the inside of an ER. I promise you that."

Smart, Buck thinks. Tommy promising that Gerrard will see the inside of an ER doesn't necessarily constitute a threat. Tommy knows how to play the game after all these years.

"You really think you would get away with anything?" Gerrard says softly.

Tommy leans forward, as far as he can over the desk, and hisses, "Try me."

Before Gerrard can say another word, Tommy turns around and strides out, not looking at any of them. As Buck and the others follow him, Buck looks back and can swear he sees Gerrard's mask slip, just the tiniest bit.

"We'll cover, Buck," Eddie says as Buck follows Tommy out to the parking lot and Buck shoots him a grateful look.

"Tommy," he says gently as Tommy gets to his truck and leans against it as though all his strings have been cut.

"I'm sorry," he croaks. "I just...I spent a really long time pretending I didn't give a shit about him but now, I've got you and I couldn't take it anymore."

Buck walks forward and wraps his arms around Tommy's waist, leaning against his chest.

"That-" Buck says, leaning in for a kiss. "Was the hottest thing I've ever seen."

Tommy blinks, clearly surprised. "What?"

"Yeah, you're getting rewarded when I get to your place tonight," Buck insists.

"Evan, I-"

But Buck kisses him again. "I've never had anyone stand up for me like that before. Thank you."

Tommy still looks pole-axed. "Um, you're welcome. I hope it doesn't make things worse."

Buck shrugs. "I can handle it. Maybe it'll make him slip up into something we can use."

Tommy sighs and cups Buck's face. "Be safe."

"I will. Go home. Hit a punching bag. I'll be there in a few hours."

Tommy nods and kisses him goodbye and drives off. Buck knows he will have that entire episode in his head on repeat for a very long time.

[yourstingrey]

Foolish One

A/N:Hiii i already tried to post this once and run away for the weekend so I didn't have to see any notes but I forgot tags so reposting lol but thank you for the support on my last fic as well I tried to take my time with this one and even though I'm still not the biggest fan of it I thought I should still post it so I can improve next time!!!

Wc:3081

Warnings: angst, situationship, lowkey toxic relationship, hinting at hooking up, i gave the cabins a bathroom cus im not making you walk outside for that, grammar??

My cards are on the table, yours are in your hand

Chances are, tonight, you've already got plans

And chances are I will talk myself to sleep again.

Me and Luke have had a bit of a flirtationship for a while. A LONG while. Sometimes I think for too long but I've always had a crush on Luke. I mean the greatest swordsman at camp, always so helpful to new campers, and he's so beautiful. So when he finally noticed me months ago I gushed to my siblings about it, in the beginning, it was perfect. He would invite me on perfect dates, little picnics by the lake, walks in the forest together ranting about things at camp that bugged us, and even a couple of ‘hangouts’ in the Hermes cabin when everyone was off. 

You give me just enough attention to keep my hopes too high

Wishful thoughts forget to mention when something's really not right

But nowadays he's always so busy I mean I can't blame him he's THE role model of camp. Plus he never forgets to slip a letter to my siblings saying he was sorry for not seeing me but I know where he is. He's never really busy.

And I will block out these voices of reason in my head. 

And the voices say, "You are not the exception. You will never learn your lesson"

Moths fill my stomach as I walk to the Hermes cabin eating holes inside me and making my nerves practically leak out of me as I approach the door. Finally reaching the pale yellow door and sucked in my breath before knocking. I rock back and forth on my heels staring at the stained glass above the door before refocusing my attention on the door opening. To my dismay, it wasn't Luke who I planned on asking to hang out with today but instead, Chris opened the door.

As he opened the door he made an almost pitiful look “Are you looking for Luke..?” I cleared my throat awkwardly before speaking “Oh um yeah… do you know where he would be by any chance!”. The look on his face practically sunk in more but then I think he realized how he was staring at me “I think he is out training but he might be busy so maybe you shouldn't see him” he said rushed while rubbing the back of his neck like it was sore “Thanks Chris but I'm sure he won't mind i'll be super quick!”

Foolish one

Stop checkin' your mailbox for confessions of love

That ain't never gonna come

You will take the long way, you will take the long way down

Leaves crunch as I walk the arena mumbling under my breath how to ask to have a break with him. Even a quick walk in the woods would work. I'm desperate for Luke now even if he wants to say he doesn't want to see me anymore I'd take it. Arena in sight my pace quickens to the entrance ready to slip in but pause as I hear the unmistakable charming laugh of Lukes but also unfamiliar hushed giggles. 

As I stand outside the clear opening I purse my lips before deciding that I would peak in just in I mean it's not like I mean to eavesdrop but I've never seen Luke with any girls so publicly he insists he likes things like that to be private saying “it's more special to keep it to ourselves”. The moment I looked inside the arena my heart dropped to my stomach it was Luke and Drew. Drew was a daughter of Aphrodite and you could tell she was tall and had long dark hair she was beautiful. Clearly, something Luke said must have said the funniest thing on the planet as they couldn't stop laughing. 

In some universe where I was braver, I would march up to them and ask what was so funny but instead, I cowered, peaking in still. But in the worst-case scenario, Luke looked over at the entrance. It wasn't even some corny I slipped and he saw he just looked over. It was clear he saw me, he whispered something over to Drew and now she was looking too. It felt like I was in quicksand I couldn't move and I was sinking deeper and deeper now that she was watching and he was heading over.

As he jogs over I hear him in an out of breath tone spit out “Hey what are you doing here?” I go back to rocking on my heels “Oh uhhh I just came to see you because we just haven't hung out in a while. I mean if you're busy it's okay just uh y'know..” I mumble out the last bit embarrassed of my stammering. Rubbing the back of his neck looking behind him before turning back at me sharply inhaling through his teeth and saying “Uh… sure yeah how about you meet me later at the spot? Just go at night and I'll meet you there.” I try not to look visibly awkward by the curt sound of his voice but I won't prod to see if that's true “Okay I'll meet you there later!” 

He looked at me before giving me a quick bye and spinning on his heel back to Drew. But honestly, I was riding a tiny high right now. I was excited to see him.  A coy smile plays on my lips as I go back to my cabin.

You know how to keep me waitin'

I know how to act like I'm fine

Don't know what to call this situation

But I know I can't call you mine

Picking out an outfit isn't hard when most of your clothes consist of orange camp shirts or the few cute clothes you took from home. I landed on shorts and a sweater before finally tiptoeing out of my cabin. The cold chill of the evening air was overwhelmed by the almost caffeine jitter bounce running through my body as I walked a secret path Luke and I practically created with how much our shoes scuffed up the ground leading to our spot. 

Reaching the end of the path expecting a familiar head of curls to be sitting maybe watching the stars waiting instead I stare out into the empty small clearing. My eyes sting and my lip wobbles. I quietly continue to shuffle over until I sit down trying to shake it off to him running a bit late. We didn't say exactly what time so honestly I felt silly getting upset. Relaxed now I bring my knees up to my chest and prop my chin up on them holding my legs with my arms. Sitting in our spot felt nostalgic for the earlier summer, stumbling off into the woods looking to escape prying eyes and stumbling on this exact spot…

And it's delicate, but I will do my best to seem bulletproof

'Cause when my head is on your shoulder

It starts thinkin' you'll come around

Swift feet run through the forest as I feel my arm being tugged along to keep up, “Luke! Slow down trust me no one is gonna find us at this rate!” my voice practically cuts out like glitches through my laughter as Luke finally slows down his pace to turn back to me “Yknow you're no fun in trying to make it private for us” tilting his head to the side and giving me a joking pout. I grab his hand and swing it back and forth “Shut up if that's true why do you spend so much of your precious time with me then hmmm?” He drops my hand and starts to walk backward further into the woods “You know what... You're on to something I've gotta get away from you! I think you must have put a spell on me, are you sure you’re not a daughter of Aphrodite after all?”

 I follow after him and jokingly shove him to the side to walk in front of him “ugh you're such a jerk someti-” My feet lifted from the ground cutting my sentence off, feeling his strong arms wrap around my torso and looking down at his laughing face before he starts to spin us in a circle a quick few times before stop and setting me back down. Looking up at Luke to see him gazing at the view in front of us, an almost perfect clearing giving you a view of the calm water below and the blue sky above a log laid down in front of it grabbing hold of luke's hand again and tugging it to get him to sit down against the log with me. Sitting I leaned my head to rest on his shoulder, knees bumping as we sat our interlocked hands sat in my lap and I just stared down at them in this light with him and me sitting here they looked almost like they were carved out of marble made only fit with each other perfectly. I changed my gaze to peer up through my lashes at Luke now to see he was already looking at me. My cheeks flare up in a warm pink glow as I feel my chest humming, his face leans down, his other hand reaching up to cup the burning cheek, eyes fluttering shut lips brushing in delicate kisses while Luke grins into it…

But then the voices say, "You are not the exception, You will never learn your lesson"

Foolish one

Stop checkin' your mailbox for confessions of love. That ain't never gonna come

You will take the long way, you will take the long way down

I shiver maybe at the breeze passing by, maybe at the memory I couldn't tell, hugging my knees tighter and looking out before the sound of a leaf quietly crunches behind me. I didn't look back though I knew it was him no one else knew our spot was too far out. He slid right next to me on the log before speaking up in a quiet tone “I'm sorry I took so long just.. Yknow my cabin has so many campers it's hard to duck out when you're their counselor, I really didn't mean to keep you waiting..” Finishing his sentence he pulls me into him making me cuddle into his side. I sigh contently forgiving him in my head because to be wrapped up with him shining down on us like a spotlight made it feel right. “s’okay thank you for coming Luke..” “Of course..”

Now I'm slidin' down the wall with my head in my hands 

Sayin', "How could I not see the signs?"

Oh, you haven't written me or called, But goodbye screamin' in the silence

We sat there together for a while and talked about what we had missed in each other's lives until the quiet chill made our hands feel frozen even with them clasped tightly together. Luke said he would walk me back to my cabin saying “If we get caught I'll just say I caught you sneaking out and I'm taking you back” Thanking the gods that we have Luke's counselor job as pass I really don't think I could handle Mr. D and Chiron put me back to cleaning the stables which I only did to take the blame for Luke last summer. 

We arrive back into camp feeling Luke unclasp our hands without a word. My steps flatter for a mere second before I simply choose to ignore the action and catch up with his stride. As we walk I speak up “Um thanks for walking me back to my cabin I really appreciate it..” “It's no problem can’t let my favorite archer walk out in the cold alone!” he says in a positive but quiet voice. “So I was wondering if I could see you again yknow maybe we could just eat together or something if you don't have a lot of time..?” Our steps come to a halt in front of my cabin now he looks at me sucking a breath from his teeth before opening his mouth to speak “Ah.. I think I'm kinda busy tomorrow, Drew asked if I could show her how to get better at sword fighting so I have to show her that… I think I'll be doing it for a while. Y’know how practice makes perfect but I'll let you know when I'm free.” 

My lips pursed together for a moment looking at my shoes as he talks and finally looking back at him when he finishes “Oh okay.. Well yeah just let me know! See you later!” I hear him mumble a quick ‘yep night’ before turning around and walking off, I stand there for a moment almost waiting to see if he would look back and maybe try to catch a glimpse of me going in, but he didn't.

'Cause you got her on your arm and me in the wings

I'll get your longing glances, but she'll get your ring

And you will say you had the best of intentions

And maybe I will finally learn my lesson

Creeping back to my bunk as quietly as possible trying not to disturb any of my sleeping siblings, but forgetting about one extra creaky floorboard located directly next to one of my sister's bunks, at camp practically everyone is a light sleeper after having to go on a quest.  A mess of tangles and a sleeping mask shot up before my sister Rey pulled it off her eyes to see me ‘doing the walk of shame’ as she once called it. “What are you doing awake…?” her voice quiet and still full of sleepiness “Oh yknoww I just hung out with Luke for a bit..”

 She sat up a little straighter and gave me the same look Chris gave me this evening. “You saw Luke..? I thought you guys were like totally over…” “Well, not completely we just fell out a bit I'm going to see him again soon he just is going to help train campers for a bit y'know!” Her brows furrow and her mouth twists with disdain “Is that camper.. Drew?” leaning against a bedpost and starting to pick at my nails “I mean yeah but like-” A loud groan cuts me off “You're kidding. I'm not saying this to hurt your feelings but.. Do you really think they're training? It just seems like what you guys used to do if you ask me..”

 She tucked herself back into the covers rolling over to stop facing me leaving me with a not so subtle hint. Walking to the bathroom to brush my teeth so i could finally sleep i find myself staring at my figure in the mirror longer, my hand dropping down to stop brushing setting it down on the sink, my lip starts to wobble again and the bitter sting filled my eyes again blurring my vision as i sunk to the floor to sit on the cool tiles for a bit. Drew and Luke were doing exactly what they used to do ‘training’ is Luke's code word for fucking. I knew that already, we used to use it often. But i thought if he saw me tonight then it couldn't be that. He wouldn't do that. But Luke would, he knows that I know those code words but Luke wouldn't do that… 

Foolish one

Stop checkin' your mailbox for confessions of love

That ain't never gonna come

You will take the long way, you will take the long way down

Waking up felt like a chore this morning, the sun shining instead of being warm and inviting felt like it was melting me down into a pile of mush as I got up. Walking to the mess hall was worse seeing them sit together breaking the camper's sit with their cabin's rule, giggling into each other's ears like I saw them before. Walking past them to my table hoping he would spare me a glance just a small look that said ‘I'm only entertaining her for a bit and I'll be back’ but he was practically bewitched by her. 

Ain't never gonna come

Ooh, you will learn the hard way now

Foolish one

Sittin' 'round waiting for confessions of love

They ain't never gonna come

A week passed by and he never came running back instead he ran around with her, when it finally sunk in the pitiful sorrys of my sibling and even a handful of Luke's friends came but they fell silent on my ears wallowing in my self-pity, shutting in my cabin for a bit before deciding I couldn't just shut myself in because I lost the 3rd most decent head of curls in camp. The night came crickets chirping, acting as my background music as I took my throw blanket off my bed to sneak out just to take a short walk to relax. Heading down the long path noticing fresh grass starting to grow back out of the scuffed dirt it brought a small grin back to my face which fell almost immediately at the sight of two figures in a oh so familiar spot. 

And thinkin' he's the one, you should've been walkin' out

Foolish one

The day is gonna come for your confessions of love

When all is said and done, he just wasn't the one

No, he just wasn't the one

[bella-rose29]

Darling

Nikolai Lantsov x f!reader

Woke up in a lot of pain because my body systems hate me, so I wrote this (I'm doing better now)

Word count: 1.4k (wtf i didn't mean to write this much lol)

Warnings: periods, anything period related, swearing, this is also based purely on my own experiences (although not the bit where he's hugging her 🥲), not proof read/edited

Tag list: @bubybubsters, @el-de-phi, @hauntedenthusiasttragedy, @iambored24601, @itsyoboo-jassy, @karensirkobabes, @kentucky-criedfricken, @little8sun, @mvidaaaa, @naushtheaspiringauthor, @notoakay, @simbaaas-stuff, @pietromaximoffsbabe (i'm so sorry lovely i completely forgot to add you earlier)

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fucking, fuck, fuck!"

"You alright, darling?"

"Yep, all good, Nik!"

Y/n was not at all good. She'd woken up next to an empty space that morning, smiling and shaking her head when she realised where her husband was, sat at his desk and already working, and then had felt an excruciating burst of pain in her abdomen. She heard Nikolai stand up, his chair thumping against the carpeted floor as he came over to the bed.

"Yeah, you're very clearly not alright, darling," he said as he took in her pained expression. "What's going on? Do you need me to get the healer?"

"Monthly cycle, and yes please," she gasped out.

"Okay. Are you able to move?" Y/n shook her head, blinking back the tears that were forming in her eyes. "Alright darling. I'll be back in a few minutes, okay? Just gonna get the healer." He planted a kiss on her forehead, then practically sprinted out of the room. Y/n would have laughed if she thought it wouldn't hurt.

Nikolai really was only gone a few minutes, returning on his own but laden with heat packs. Y/n felt tears form for a different reason as he knelt down next to the bed to activate the heat packs, placing them on her lower stomach, adjusting them so that they all fit. The healer appeared with an assistant then, bag in hand as she sent Y/n an apologetic look.

"How are you doing, Your Majesty?"

"Not great," she whispered, eyes squeezed shut in an attempt to force the pain away. It was times like these that Y/n wished she were Grisha; if she were a Healer or a Tidemaker then maybe she could heal the pain away or force her body to comply through the water in her brain. The healer and Nikolai were talking, although Y/n couldn't make out what was being said, but then a minute or so later her husband was out the room and the healer was placing her hands over Y/n's abdomen, attempting to ease the Queen's pain. The assistant had brought a change of underclothes, helping Y/n to swap them.

"The King has just gone to arrange some things so that your day is easier for you, Your Majesty, he'll be back in a bit. I'll stay here for as long as you need, and in a moment I'll ask you to take the tonic on your bedside table, alright?" Her voice was calm and soothing, and Y/n felt ready to drift off.

"What's the tonic for?"

"It should alleviate some of the pain. We've only recently developed it, but it's had an incredibly high success rate."

"Oh, okay." She was feeling better now, the work the healer was doing helping hugely, and the heat packs distracted from what pain was left over.

"Are you able to sit, Your Majesty?"

"I think so, hang on." Wincing at the stab of pain when she moved, Y/n gritted her teeth, and with the help of the healer was able to sit up in bed. Nikolai returned then, now carrying a box of some description, and his face lit up at the sight of his wife looking better.

"I've got chocolate," he said, lifting the box. "And I managed to convince the head cook to surrender a couple of those breakfast pastries you love so much. Don't feel you need to eat anything now, darling, just let me know and I'll get it for you." She laughed lightly, flinching when it made the pain increase, and took the hand he offered when he sat down next to her. He managed to manoeuvre them so that he was sat behind her, a leg on either side. He pressed kisses to her hair every now and then, arms stroking up and down her arms, sometimes drifting down to gently stroke her stomach.

"Do you think you're able to take the tonic now, Your Majesty?"

"Yeah, I think so."

It tasted bitter going down, and nothing seemed to happen, but the healer reassured her that it would kick in within about 20 minutes.

"I just need to go and sort a few things out, Your Majesty, but I'll come back every so often to check up on how you're doing and bring you more tonics, alright?"

"Thank you," Nikolai said, grateful smile appearing on his face. The healer and her assistant bowed, exiting the room. The couple sat in silence for a while, Y/n basking in the warmth of the packs and her husband's body behind her, and the soft touches of his hands on her arms. Her heart ached with how gentle and loving he was being, and the tears came back. Hearing her quiet sniffles, Nikolai panicked, thinking it had gotten worse.

"What's wrong, darling? Does it still hurt?"

"No," she replied, shaking her head. "Well, yes, but not as much. It's not that though. I guess I'm just a little overwhelmed by you, Nik."

Although she couldn't see it, his brow furrowed in confusion.

"Me? Why?"

"I've never been looked after like this before. It's nice. And I guess because we were arranged I thought you wouldn't care that much, but you do, and my body is all out of whack right now which isn't helping but it's making me want to cry because I love you."

Nikolai was silent for a while, never stopping stroking her arms, but Y/n started to worry. She was just about to speak up when he finally spoke.

"I love you too, Y/n."

Then she really did start crying, tears slipping down her face and wetting the bedsheets. Nikolai turned her face towards his, softly wiping away what he could and leaning in to press his lips to hers. It was brief, but more full of love than any other they'd shared, and Y/n couldn't believe how lucky she'd been in getting him as her husband.

"Wait," she said, pulling away with a frown. "What about your meetings?"

"Cancelled them," Nikolai shrugged. "You're more important to me, darling."

"Won't Zoya be mad? That you're leaving things to her?"

"She was actually weirdly understanding for Zoya. I'm fully convinced I'm going to be sent some very strongly worded letters involving death threats, though. Or made to plant face first into the lake by a strong wind."

Y/n giggled, picturing the scenario, and made a mental note to ask Zoya to do just that. Preferably when Nikolai was in just his slacks, suspenders and undershirt, and not for any particular reason.

"You'll be fine, Kolya."

~~~

Later that day, Y/n was feeling much better, having taken another dose of the tonic, and was sat outside by the lake with Zoya. Nikolai had rescued a frog (although the frog looked rather happy where it was) and was placing it on the bank. All of a sudden, the wind picked up, and Nikolai was pushed in the water, arms windmilling as he fell. It was a warm day, so he'd taken off his jacket, and while Y/n did feel a little bad for asking Zoya to push him in, all regrets were washed away when he emerged from the lake, completely soaked with water from head to toe.

He stalked over, trying not to smile at how loudly his wife was laughing, and pointed an accusatory finger at the Grisha General.

"I know that was you, Zoya. How could you, to your King, of all people!"

"I was just doing what my Queen commanded, Your Majesty," she mock bowed from where she sat, smirk on her face as she watched Nikolai wipe the water from his eyes. Y/n was still cackling next to her, and Zoya was glad to see her friend doing better than this morning.

"Darling Y/n?"

"Yes?"

"Would you like a hug?" Her eyes widened, almost comically so, as Nikolai leaned in, arms open wide. She shrieked with joy as he got closer, pushing him away (not really, he was far too strong).

"Nik!" she laughed, all thoughts of pain completely forgotten.

He did eventually get his hug, but only when he was clean and dry (Y/n had found bits of grass and water plants in his hair), and not threatening to cover Y/n in lake water.

"Thank you, Nik, for everything today."

"Of course, darling. I love you."

"Love you too," she hummed, drifting off in her husband's arms.

[impactrueno]

It's kinda interesting to see your writing on beetlebabes, altho I'm definitely not going to bother sinking too many braincells into it. I only got into the cartoon something like 12 years ago? By then I was already an adult, so I didn't have any romantic projection onto it, and yeah, I recall finding any non-ship content in the cartoon tag almost impossible (but not 100%!!). To me, this always bled into bigger problems with cartoon porn that was especially common in the 90s (or with 90s audiences & cartoons) and not a beetlejuice specific thing. I will say, after dipping my toes in post-musical, I'm much, much happier than people are now reliably tagging and I can just blacklist. I did wind up putting DNI stuff on a couple or so pieces of art some years back, but that's because tumblr crawls things horribly in search engines (which is why there's so many pornbots). I hated HATED the mistake I made of posting some bj cartoon art with a url of my actual name on tumblr because for a while that meant if you googled my name + beetlejuice, the image results were very liable to show up with cartoon porn, because of shippers reblogging it and that being enough for google to associate your posts with anything else on their blogs. Tumblr is suchhh a shit site in how it's coded. But I doubt anyone ever worried about that but me.

i hear you with that 90s cartoon porn and its fans thing oh my god. i know exactly what you're talking about, i've always hated it lmao

i'm glad you were able to find a more comfortable space once the musical came out. the fandom expanded greatly with it and i think the elder fans are annoyed by that. don't listen to them lol they're a very loud minority. most people tag stuff and keep out of each other's hair, as it should be.

also that google search thing; yeah i think you're the only one who worried about that. i don't know you, but i think the chances of someone googling someone's real name + a fandom are very low unless you use it to sign your art or for your portfolio or something. regardless, if they DO do that and cartoon porn shows up in the search, i'm sure they wouldn't think absolutely anything of it or that it has anything to do with you. it's really hard to google fanart for anything and NOT have porn show up at some point lol. so you're good!

[wowowwild]

For the ask meme, any of the ship questions? There are quite a few ships I've seen you reblog stuff for so I was curious.

I'll answer 22. Your OTP?, 24. Your OT3, and 25. Favorite rare pair?

I have a couple charts that I update on occasion, these care there current appearances:

Not pictured is Gregory Edgeworth/Tyrell Badd and Vera Misham/Wocky Kitaki. They don't get to be on the chart bc they are uncomplicated.

Oh and I should probably explain the colors lol. Blue is I def ship it, Orange is the ship intrigues me or I like it in certain situations and I could be convinced to full on ship it. The one green is Krisnix bc that's fucked up but they definitely have a toxic psychosexual thing going on, sorry, I don't make the rules. We have a pink between Dhurke and Datz bc they seem like codependent besties who have probably made out a couple times. Amara is cool with it. And we have a red line for klavdar bc it defintiely happened but I hate Daryan. Sorry.

As you can tell I am a multishipper and I also happen to be a faqn of polycules. Will I ever write a megacule fic? Maybe. So far the closest I'm getting is Bag-verse which will be Pollycule VS Emacule.

So OTP? If I can only pick two characters I'm going klapollo all the way. They're my boys (gender neutral).

OT3? Claypollier. My boys plus my other boy (gender neutral).

My fav rare pair? Probably Aura/Amara. It's just the biggest power move on Aura's part. Aura are you dating the former queen of Khura'in? And can you imagine it from Simon's perspective? Aura are you dating my partner's mother? Nahyuta finds out and he and Athena start a support group for the children of Aura's partners. Apollo shows up when he starts getting letters from them. Aura takes her role of step mother very seriously (read: she really likes to fuck with them). Rayfa doesn't call into meetings unless she's mad at Aura bc otherwise they get along.

And Aura genuinely likes Amara and helps her through everything. They actually have a lot in common.

So yeah. The real question is how do I tag this? I don't know the majority of the ship names and I'm pretty sure some don't have one. Please let me know if you know one I haven't tagged or if there's an official one if I made one up.

[fonulyn]

20 Questions for Fic Authors

thanks for the tag @thebrandywine 💖

answers under the cut.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

268 works.

2. What is your AO3 wordcount?

1,256,253 words.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

RE. and still have the urge to write Gears but lol if you thought nivannedy was a rare pair...

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

nobody's perfect (TOG, pretty gen)

now drunk on lust I drown in you (forever within I'm lost in you) (RE, Chreon)

and who's to find the way right through you (RE, Chreon)

scattered fragments of time (that's all we are) (RE, Chreon)

how to accidentally get adopted - a guide by Piers Nivans (RE, Piers-centric, also background Chreon)

5. Do you respond to comments?

always! i know i missed a couple, sometimes i take ages, but i do always try to respond bc i love and cherish nice comments.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

the bad endings on three words to last forever. i still like the angstiest one the most :'D

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

lmao like everything else idk i want them happy. i've written loads of fluff idk how to quantify which is the happiest.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

only ever got a few nasty comments thankfully, so no, not really.

9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind?

yeppp. idk what does 'which kind' mean? anything that feels inspiring lol.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written?

not really. i did start a few back in the day but i didn't really finish them. i am not really into crossovers tbh i don't even read them 99% of the time.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

yeah. someone was selling it on amazon pffth.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

a few. apparently five on ao3 lol but i think there was one or two back in the lj days too. might be wrong tho :'D

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

lol loads. at one point in life like... fifteen years ago, most things i wrote were co-written with a friend. and i've done it a couple of times after that too. i really like co-op stuff tbh but haven't found people to collab with lately.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

right now i would sell my soul for nivannedy. might already have.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

ehhhh at this moment i doubt i'll ever finish anything. maybe the lifeguard au? i was red-hot for the idea at first but then it kinda... fizzled out. kept changing. got ruined by pushy ppl lol. but maybe i'll get back to it one day bc i would love a nivannedy summer romance tbh.

16. What are your writing strengths?

uhm. characterization. dialogue. emotional shit? idk i think i do best when i have intimate moments with two people. tiny everyday moments and mundane shit. like that. if i get going writing sometimes flows super well and i think i can get consistently readable stuff done in one go. but that'd require getting going lol.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

action. i suck at action. i also suck at it in the way that i can't actually make myself start writing. i got way too co-dependent when i still had people excitedly participating in the process and now i sit here sad doing nothing :'D but anyway. writing action and having some self-discipline lol.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

depends very heavily on the context. in general i do think it should be all in one language for readability but there are exceptions. i've done it too lol but it was only like a line or two in finnish :'D

19. First fandom you wrote for?

diru, twenty years ago lmao, it's like a different lifetime. i only learned of the existence of fanfic at the ripe old age of nineteen lol but yeah it's still been so long now.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

asdjfngkn i can not choose between all of my children c'mon. uhm. am just gonna say the self-indulgent series bc it truly was so important to me for so long and i'm still devastated it ended. sigh. now i made myself sad again :'D

[chameliyun]

20 Q's for Fic Writers

thanks for the tag @spacejammie-eimmajecaps!

How many works do you have on ao3? Officially 8, but I have one on anon and one currently unrevealed in a fic exchange

What's your total ao3 word count? 61,996

What fandoms do you write for? So far I've written for Death Note, Tangled the Series, Avatar: The Last Airbender, and Haikyuu, plus a couple of crossovers. Haikyuu is definitely my main rn though

What are your top five fics by kudos? #1: Frosting and Freckles: 69 (nice) #2: Draw Me Near: 39 #3: [embarrassing anon fic]: 35 #4: Varian Is Not a Wizard: 25 #5: Midnight Coda: 21

Do you respond to comments? Yeah, I love to! I don't get a lot so they always make me happy :)

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? probably the anon fic sdfsk but other than that, Midnight Coda is kinda bittersweet because of what happens later

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? hmm idk but the sappiest is definitely Frosting and Freckles

Do you get hate on fics? Not so far, thankfully! I don't think I have a big enough readership for that haha

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I have not; not sure what kind it would be if I did

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I love writing crossovers! A PJO/HP crossover was actually what got me into fanfic. Unfortunately most of them are merely concepts or abandoned (for now), but as for crazy, I think my Lunar Chronicles/PJO one is the craziest in terms of how the plot grew out of control from a simple "what if these two characters interacted" to "I could rewrite most of this series," which is why I got stuck and put it on hiatus lol but I do want to get back to it someday. Maybe once I finish my other active crossover

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge

What's the longest you've spent working on one fic? And the shortest? Uhhh well if we count "working on" as "having it in the back of mind to get to but haven't worked on in months," probably Sent from the Heavens lol. If not, then Varian Is Not a Wizard (just over two years since I published the first chapter). Shortest is definitely Midnight Coda, since I wrote that pretty much in a day iirc

Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, but it sounds like it could be fun!

What's your all-time favorite ship? From all fandoms? Dude I have no idea how to narrow that down. Best I can give you is my current fave is Tsukkiyama from Haikyuu

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Probably my "Leo Valdez ends up in the ATLA world" one :sob: It never made it past the word doc and about three pages of story and I haven't looked at it in like two years

What are your writing strengths? I like to think I'm pretty good at dialogue and grammar/spelling

What are your writing weaknesses? Everything else (jk). I am awful at describing scenes/settings; I get bored writing them so I don't put as much effort in as I should haha. I also tend to ramble and use passive voice too much

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I haven't done it, but I think it's fine as long as it fits the context

First fandom you wrote for? Published: Avatar: The Last Airbender. Unpublished: Percy Jackson

Favorite fic you've written? I think it's still Bent Out of Shape. It's so niche, but I had an idea and I executed it, and I'm proud of what I accomplished. Although once I finish Varian Is Not a Wizard, that might take the top slot.

No-pressure tagging: @supermarine-silvally @starrynightarchive @litterateur97 @palant1r @soreiya @lilac-writes @oloreandil @kandybarkreepshow @ellegamgee and anyone else who wants to!

[smashboxgirl26]

a random list of long fic recs (aka longer than 5k) from ao3 ft. bakugou, shoji, dabi, and jean that no one asked for bc i was bored!!

(some of these are nsfw, which i will warn about for the big ones, but make sure to check their tags before reading anything!)

and beware, this is very long bc i clearly have nothing better to do with my time hehe

you call me wound but i will answer to knife (bakugou x reader) by kirkeeter; i got this recced by a friend and omygodddd i loved it so so so so so much, it's been a while since i read it but it's tech support! reader working under ph! bakugou

Steal Your Girl (bakugou x reader) by Tcierra_Steph7; the actual first bakugou x reader fic i ever read (the literal fic that got me into fics) and it's SO AMAZING OMG, canon compliant, but it's not a bad thing bc it's framed super well (there's also Dear Diary , which i've been obsessed with FOREVER but i dont think it'll ever be updated at this point which is okay - but if you've read (past tense) or read (present tense) either of these, you'll have my heart forever <33)

Other (bakugou x reader) by deadite; a coraline au that's superr good and goes super in depth of the world it creates and i was completely hooked when i read it

His (bakugou x reader) by PBelfz; one of the best yandere! bakugou stories i have ever read, but be warned - highly nsfw (ik yandere is not everyone's cup of tea but if you're into that stuff and haven't read this fic, you should read it!)

surrender (whenever you're ready) (bakugou x reader) by OfMermaids; one of my favorite fanfics ever!! and anything written by her is honestly amazing (especially The Widening Sky, a mermaid au, and The Sun God's Bride, a fantasy au, which you should definitely also check out!!)

Bar Tool (bakugou x reader) by thunderhead; band au AND bar au?? but yeah this fic has everything you could ever want it's sooo good

darling it's better (down where it's wetter) (bakugou x reader) by makoodles; another one of my favorite mermaid aus (bc i love mermies too much and it's my favorite trope) but also contains nsfw content

Gemini Syndrome - Masked Singer AU (bakugou x reader) by opal_vortex; one of the most UNDERRATED fics ive ever read! and the concept is so good!! bakugou goes on the masked singer and the reader is one of the judges loll

Husband for Hire (bakugou x reader) by btp; stardew valley au! (and also one of a couple of fics that inspired strawberry jam loll)

well, i've been saved by the grace of southern charm (bakugou x reader) by willowser; soooo soo soo good!! contains nsfw but if you liked strawberry jam then ur gonna like this one even more it's everything i hope my writing is and more

drawing with light (shoji x reader) by multipurposeroom; literally the fic that made me fall in love with shoji and made me want to cradle him in my arms for the rest of my life bc of how sweet he is

We All Fall Down (dabi x reader) by Musecookie; the reader is an art student who ends up drawing dabi and he finds it in the dumpster and shit ensues and its sooo good, it's also been a long time since it's been updated but it's superrrr great!!!

Higher than the Mountain, Deeper than the Sea (dabi x reader) by maokitty; contains nsfw but it is so!! good!! and it dives into his character so so so so well!

if he's a serial killer than what's the worst that can happen to a girl that's already hurt? (dabi x reader) also by willowser; contains nsfw and i'm actually currently reading this one! but it's very very good so far and im excited to get through it!

Ice Scream, You Scream (jean kirstein x reader) by LilacMochi; contains nsfw but hehehehehhe i loved it AND I READ IT DURING THE SUMMER LOL IT WAS SO FUN

Sweet Tooth (jean kirstein x reader) by cloudspawn; currently reading this one, but IT IS AMAZING AND AN ABSOLUTE FAVORITE I CANNOT EVEN STRESS HOW GOOD IT IS ISTG (you'll see all my comments under each chapter loll)

[amostimprobabledream]

This is going to sound kind of well-duh, but here it is...

So...I have a habit of occasionally hyperfixating on blogs I find, usually when I've found a new fandom and want to immerse myself in it. And then I get attached to it and I'll start sending anons sharing ideas and stuff, especially if the person running the blog seems chill and I lowkey want to be friends.

EXCEPT I'M KIND OF SHY SOMETIMES so I always do it with anon turned on. So that way it seems like it's a lot of different people and not just me bothering them over and over...

And it's so crazy because actually, there are a couple of blogs out there who have had thoughts/prompts/etc I sent in and made really awesome content - based off something I sent in! My friend will confirm this, I've literally sent her perhaps hundreds of asks, mostly anonymously, to her blog, but she knows it's me because she knows the way I type/phrase things too well.

So why don't I just write them myself?!

I guess it's lowkey me trying to contribute and if I'm new to the fandom, I don't always feel confident about taking on the ideas I come up with. But when it comes to writing short headcanons or whatever, I rarely do it because for some reason I got it into my head that people won't want to read something so short?

EVEN THOUGH I LOVE READING SHORT LITTLE PIECES IN RESPONSE TO MY PROMPTS.

So I guess from now on, when I have an idea, I should just write it myself instead of constantly outsourcing my ideas to other people because I think they'll do them better then me, and maybe that way more people will interact with me/my blog, which I'd very much like! I love yapping about fandoms with people (so long as they aren't being rude to me lol), and I have no idea why it's taken me this long to figure this out. My tumblr is like ten years old and I've been active on it since like 2017. I feel so stupid. I don't know why I decided the only way people would consume any content by me MUST be in a fully fleshed-out fanfic idea and not just a small post or drabble. I almost want to tag some of the people I've been sending anons to all this time and confessing that they were actually me, but some of the people I don't really talk to anymore (we didn't have a fight or anything, I just realised I was putting way more energy into the friendship than they were), or they don't know who I am and probably think I'm just an overeager weirdo (which I am, tbf) , or it's my friends who DO know it's me. Idk, maybe with some of them I should still be like, "Hey, remember X/Y/Z post? I'm the anon who sent that!" Like, this is YEARS worth of content in some cases. When I find a blog I like I stick to them unless they start posting/reblogging some shit I don't want to see.

So yeah, I guess this post is to say, from now on you can expect to see a lot more fandom-related content from me, but in a smaller scale instead of churning out fanfics every two months or so.

Thoughts? Opinions? I hope you guys reading this are excited about this extremely overdo moment of clarity!

[itsanidiom]

SHIPPER TAG GAME

LET'S GOOOOO~ tagged by @negrowhat

1. What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don't care anymore?

Glorestor or Glorfindel / Erestor of Middle Earth Fanon Fame. Not that I don't CARE about it anymore, mind you. There's just not enough new content (for obvious reasons god it's old and there's like one conversation of original source material). I don't think about them as much anymore. Like I used to be reading fanfic EVERY NIGHT and we're talking like novel length fanfics (as you can imagine people in the LOTR fandom write lol). Anyway here's some super old fan art... (>u<)

2. Which ship would you consider your first one?

Oh god...something Dynasty Warriors related for sure...

Probably like Sun Ce / Zhao Yu or Gan Ning / Lu Xun. (GO WU! lol) I feel like there were other couples I'm totally forgetting right now...but yeah god I love Dynasty Warriors...

Also...daaamn Gan Ning looks good there I should go buy the latest game. (>w<)

3. Your first fanfic belonged to which couple?

Like the first one I wrote or read?? I went into my oldest of old "old writing" folders and found this list of docs that I haven't been touched in over ten years. SO I'm gonna saaaay it was a Dynasty Warriors fanfic...one of these pairings. (^ ^;)

Also kind of hilarious to see that I literally still organize my fanfic files in the same way for over half my fucking life ago...nice...

4. Do you remember the first couple you saw a fanart over?

I feel like it would have been something Inuyasha related. That or something Final Fantasy X. I do not remember, but it was probably some version of these scene.

5. Did you ever get into ship discourse?

Not that I can remember...do not need this in my life...lol but maybe I've reblogged some RPF like discourse? Like the "should or shouldn't you ship" type discussions. I'm on the side of "do whatever you want but don't send it to the famous people" [ex. like ATEEZ fanfic/fanart] or "if they are literally doing it as part of their promo go ahead, it's for fun/they literally requested it as part of their promo" [ex. BillyBabe]. (^ ^;)

6. Did you used to have any no-otp or have it currently?

It honestly always depends on the quality of the fanart or the fanfic because even a notp can turn into a OH!tp if it's good enough. [Exhibit a: my Phaya/Tharn/Chalothorn fanfic]

7. Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

Weirdly the one new Chalothon/Singh fic from The Sign. But I really need AO3 to fix the spelling of his name in the tag...

8. Currently, do you have any OTPs?

PhayaTharn are the current obsession~

Look at them...adorable...

9. Is there any couple that, to this day, you are extremely mad about not getting together?

Still wish John Wick / Santino fucked...also like James Bond / Q and The Protagonist / Neil and Arthur / Eames...bromance is SUCH a waste but considering the genres of these movies it is never gonna happen...I have to wait for the Thai BL versions lol (^ ^;)

10. Is there any ship you used to dislike but now you think they are kind of interesting?

OH I haven't been traumatized by watched it yet, but Dead Friends Forever has made me get onboard with Macau/Chay of KinnPorsche fame because OMG LOOK AT THESE CUTIES!!!!

11. Do you have any ship that, in the past, was considered normal but now you would be cancelled over?

GOD I remember there was a LOT of Sesshomaru x Inuyasha yaoi when I was a kid LMFAO like...straight up cancelled...I dunno if it was normal back then but no yaoi was normal back then so like it sadly all got lumped together or something...then again looking at some of the comics that are coming out these days...

12. What was your favorite crack ship?

All the McFassy ships from back in the day like OMG REMEMBER JUNGKOV?? STELIOS AND LETO??? ARCHIE AND ROBBIE? SO MANY CROSSOVERS!!

LOL Sorry that just brought me back LOL

13. Who is the couple you read more fanfics of?

Ahhhh I don't know...I usually either write a lot or read a lot...I literally have a fic rec list for Glorestor lol and then when I look in my AO3 bookmarks the top ship is Hannigram sooooo let's say Hannigram even though I haven't read one for a while.

14. What most of your ships usually have in common?

toll and smol...i like me a toll and a smoll...lol or big and small...i dunno something something contrast something something just crush him and/or be uncharacteristically gentle or somehow incapacitate the larger man with your wiles...that is all...

15. What do you absolutely hate in a ship?

Miscommunication < seconding @negrowhat's response. Cannot stand it. Such a boring trope. Very annoying for me (the audience).

[fractured-shield]

WIP questionnaire tag

thanks for the tag @honeybewrites!

What’s the first part of your WIP that you created?

Four of my characters: Therien, Oenith, Idhren, and Leithe. Everyone else (and the setting) came later.

If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

Oh, good question, I haven't really considered that too much. I could see it maybe being something like the TLoVM theme but a bit less actiony? still very character-focused with lots of group shots lol

What are your favorite characters that you made? Why?

Oh, Idhren, no question. Therien's in second place and she would like it that way. Idhren is like...the comfort character of highest honors for me. I swear, the man's been a better influence on me than my own damn family. My last therapist was like "you should consider writing a character that's what you feel you needed as a child" and I had to be like "ma'am I have been doing that for a decade I'm way ahead of you"

What other pieces of media do you think your fanbase would share?

I already said TLoVM/CR and like yeah definitely that. fun fantasy setting with a bunch of queer idiots and so much emotional damage. vax stans pspsps i have something to interest you. also just like. the lotr/silm influences are heavily apparent in the "mourning the ruins of your people" and "living a long life is a unique sort of grief" and "doing something with the situation you're given even when you're scared and nobody important" and a couple of the characters don't worry about maithyr there's nothing to see there

What has been your biggest struggle with your WIP?

mostly just sharing it, I think? I've been through enough drafts and major overhauls, and seen enough progress that I can let myself relax and trust that the characterizations and plot details will iron themselves out. but for as compelling as these characters are to me, there's a lot of "is this any good / is this cheesy and blatantly generic / is anything i'm trying to say coming across right"

Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

yes!! so first of all there's dragons. they're not like, inherently more magical than other species, but the lochieru will use them in rituals the same way other mages might use the occasional feather or bone. but dragons are unique because their eggs are incubated in the earth and drain nutrients from the land while they develop. this is because the god who created dragons was removed from the gods' order for their actions, and was unable to finish their work and make dragon eggs grow without stealing other life. ...there are also horses and other livestock, which I try to give attention to as well. I have a degree in animal science and used to work with horses, so there's lots of "character is struggling with sheep handling for hours and now smells like lanolin and dirt" and "distinct personalities and quirks for everyone's horses"

How do your characters travel/get around?

aside from the lochieru and their dragons, mostly just...horses, whether ridden or in harness. sometimes ships, though trade with the western expanse is mostly dried up so there's little use for boats large enough and sturdy enough to make the journey

What part of your WIP are you working on right now?

I'm starting a new first draft, meaning the first draft after major plot/setting overhaul number...four? something like that. I'm just finishing up the first act, in chapter 6. this draft has been really interesting, it's the first time I feel I can see forward clearly and also still be surprised by new directions the story wants to take

What aspects (tropes, maybe?) will you think draw your audience in?

I keep saying chosen family, but it's more like, a bio family that was separated and chooses to repair their relationships and figure out how to be close again. the protagonist is aroace and pretty far from the whole "hyper-competent young protagonist" trope. there's elves and dragons and magic so that's something lmao. also like, what i hope is a very well-handled depiction of trauma and mental illness represented in a couple different characters in different ways

What are your hopes for your WIP?

I kind of just want to be able to share it in its finished form, I guess? like whether that's traditional publishing, serialized self-pub online, whatever. I love these characters and I think they deserve to be appreciated and remembered outside of my own head, even if it's just by one or two people, and I want to have something tangible like a finished set of books to show for the decade+ and counting of work, even if it's just a single copy for myself

tagging: @diabolical-blue @the-golden-comet @ryderwritings @leahnardo-da-veggie @finickyfelix (sorry if anyone's been tagged already) and anyone else who wants to join!

[lusiibeingcute]

...suppose i should be makin' a real introduction...

...prefer not ta share my name online ... y'all can call me pasque ... or just about anything else. i've been called dad a couple times ... 'pparently it's an alien word for lusus or somethin' ... don't bother me none :} ... i use he/him :}...

...i made this blog so trolls could share cute pictures and stories about their lusii ... and cuz one a' my cullees told me i should get grumblr...

...speakin' of,,, i'm a little old for this social media thing ... 19 sweeps young,,, haha ... i'm also beforan (apparently some trolls on here ain't...? nice ta meet ya, non-beforans) ... 'm a culler of two an' a former cullee myself (lifelong,,, haha) ... this blog ain't about me or about cullin',,, but if ya got any questions about either i'd be happy to answer 'em ... my cullees might talk on here sometimes, but y'all better be nice ... an' before ya ask,,, one of 'ems too young for an account an' the other don't want social media...

...uh,,, some other stuff 'bout me ... please don' yell,,, i got sensitive ears ... i understand if yer quirk's all caps,,, that ain't the same thing,,, don' worry ... i also don' talk in real life,,, but i'm real verbose when i write :} ... i'm an oliveblood,,, m' sign's lesces ... all my quads're open (too busy farmin' and cullin' to really get out there,,, haha) i live on a lusus farm,,, an' my lusus is still alive an' kickin' (no,,, they don' always take away yer lusus when yer culled) ... i'll post pictures of 'er eventually :}...

...so uh, yeah ... send me stuff about yer lusii or ask me questions,,, jus' be nice to each other's all i ask :} ... oh, an' ya can't offend me,,, so don' bother,,, i've heard it all...

...tags i use:...

#...cute lusii... - ...what this blog's really for,,, cute pictures and stories about lusii...

#...me... - ...me...

#...pictures... - ...photos,,, either from asks or if my kiddos can ever teach me how this ding-danged palmhusk is s'posed to work...

#...kiddos... - ...my cullees ... love 'em lots...

#...cullin'... - ...posts about cullin'...

#...talkin'... - ...havin' conversations with folks...

OOC: run by @upward-centrifuge :D

NOTE: if you wanna send an ask on anon but you want it to have a picture, just send me the picture separately and tell me which anon you want me to attach it to.

I wanted to make a gimmick blog and for some reason I went hey, let's make the gimmick blog the only character i have with actual backstory and shit. anyway i'm not giving background for him like i do for my other blogs you're just gonna have to find out for yourself. what i will say is cowboy dad is transgender as hell. He's... technically nonverbal but only in the most literal sense? Idk if there's a word for that? He'll talk your ear off when he's able to write, type, or sign, it's just talking out loud he can't do. He's only 40 but is basically a grandfather. He for sure thinks lol means lots of love.

typing quirk: starts and ends paragraphs with ellipses, puts spaces around punctuation that ends a sentence and turns punctuation into ellipses (...? , ...! , ,,, , etc). Capitalizes nothing ever. Has a southern accent that shows itself in his typing quirk. Uses a bracket for a mouth in his emojis like this :}. Refuses to swear but will very willingly make things up or use ridiculous expressions to replace swears. Misuses "quotation marks", usually for """emphasis""". Similarities in his typing quirk to a certain canon bronzeblood's are entirely accidental I swear. It's based on how old people text and is also supposed to convey that he hates it when things are loud.

anyways enjoy Pasque he's for sure one of the guys ever.