#Woe. Splat Carnival Be Upon Ye

[veemopusvulgaris]

ANYWAY here’s that essay:

eiden: def a shooter main! tried and true splattershot boy, admittedly favors vanilla over ttek bc trizooka is fuckin cool. mains tri-stringer as a secondary.

aster: (vanilla) inkbrush main, definitely the type that zips around the map to try and flank (and succeeds… usually)… but will also just as easily draw a heart for u <3

morvay: splatling main. hydra is his baby, but also good with the ballpoint and heavy splatlings. very good backliner who totally doesn’t pick off anyone trying to sneak up on aster wait what??? nope that shitty little inkbrush can fend for himself >:( he totally does tho.

yakumo: also a shooter main, favors the high-fire weapons (like n-zap. especially n-zap. vanilla and ‘89.). admittedly gets a little serotonin boost from eiden grabbing a sippy from his tacticooler and thanking him :3

edmond: DEFINITELY a splatana main (uses wiper a bit more often though). has 5-starred both wiper and stamper. he’s kinda scary with it. also a former inkbrush main but not really

olivine: roller main! mains vanilla carbon and big swig, he’s definitely one of those sneaky carbon players who just appear out of nowhere and whack you silly. uses octobrush as a secondary main.

quincy: roller main 2 electric boogaloo! (least troublesome weapon) mainly plays dynamo roller (fuckhuge roller for a fuckhuge man) but also dabbles with the krak-on splat roller. usually stays out of sight and back of line, cept when he’s playing kraken.

kuya: E-Liter Motherfucker Supreme™ mainly plays chargers (and mini splatling, surprisingly), mains the aforementioned e-liter (definitely uses respawn punisher.) he’s very slippery. uses the default flip out emote just to fuck with ppl (eiden) after relentlessly tagging them

garu: mains shooters and sloshers! specifically .56 gal and vanilla slosher. the bucket is just fun to play, but he REALLY shines with the .56! he can’t spin it on his fingers unfortunately like some of the cooler squids do 😭

karu: shooters are lame. blasters are DEFINITELY a choice the great master karu would make though! range blaster is his go-to, followed by rapid pro and vanilla blaster.

blade: brellas! he regularly uses them to shield darling <3 any specific favorite? all of them! but splat brella has the cutest pattern <3 he favors the tetra dualies when in assassin mode.

dante: also a slosher main, but favors explosher and sloshing machine especially. esp machine that’s his go-to. smartest booyah bomb user /srs also uses goo tuber as a secondary main.

i cannot control the hyperfixation; here’s what weapons i think the nukani guys would main. in this essay i will