#WHY DID I WRITE A SINGLE PHRASE THAT I CANT SING ALL IN ONE GO

[jupitersflytrap]

being made irrationally angry by my own music

[thehighestmountains]

evermore review and ranking:

overall, i found this album to have more skippable songs than folklore and the middle of my ranking definitely feels like the middle whereas in my folklore ranking, #14 was still a fav. folklore was a true anomaly where i was just adding the whole album to my playlist. evermore really feels like folklore’s little sister getting the hand-me-downs, who just doesnt know who she is or what shes doing with her life, what is the theme exactly. 

tis the damn season. i fell in love in the first five seconds. i love the moody mature guitar strums and drum beats amping up the entire song. the story of coming back to an old love in your hometown reminds me of the show ‘the normal people’. im a real sucker for sagas, timeless loves that pull you in time and time again, familiar feelings that just feel right because you experienced them at such a young age.  this song gets me.

There's an ache in you, put there by the ache in me But if it's all the same to you It's the same to me

So we could call it even You could call me "babe" for the weekend ​'Tis the damn season, write this down

Sleep in half the day just for old times' sake I won't ask you to wait if you don't ask me to stay So I'll go back to L.A. and the so-called friends

long story short. this is such a banger r u joking. i feel every single one of my blood cells pumping as soon as this song starts. i even love the post-chorus, a great break from the chorus and the verses. i could post the whole song as my favorite lines.

And you passed right by I was in the alley, surrounded on all sides The knife cuts both ways If the shoe fits, walk in it 'til your high heels breakAnd I fell from the pedestal Right down the rabbit hole Long story short, it was a bad time When I dropped my sword I threw it in the bushes and knocked on your door And we live in peace But if someone comes at us, this time, I'm ready

ivy. hard not to compare this to illicit affairs, but this is like an upbeat version. if i didnt even pay attention to the lyrics, i would think this is so fun and catchy, it sounds good. there is no anger, there is a joy. and i just like it.

Oh, goddamn My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand Taking mine, but it's been promised to another Oh, I can't Stop you putting roots in my dreamland My house of stone, your ivy grows And now I'm covered in you So yeah, it's a fire It's a goddamn blaze in the dark And you started it

willow. im really glad this was the leading single because this is a beautiful stringy piece with a great melody. when i was reading the lyrics before listening to the song, it sounded extremely cheesy with “thats my man”, “i come back stronger than a 90s trend”, but in the song, i love it. theres a lot of heart and oompf to this.

And if it was an open-shut case I never would've known from that look on your face Lost in your current like a priceless wine

The more that you say, the less I know Wherever you stray, I follow

coney island. i wonder why she picked coney island, a very summery location with the bright lines and merry go, when the whole album is supposed to be a winterscape. i barely understand what this song is about but i enjoy the sounds.

Did I close my fist around something delicate? Did I shatter you?

evermore. i love when justin vernon starts singing with that beautiful falsetto “cant not think of all the cost and the things that will be lost”.

Or the violence of the dog days I'm on waves, out being tossed

champagne problems. before i get into this, i like this song, im impressed with the bridge and the chorus, i enjoy the story. just a small thing: title phrase. i just dont vibe with it, the rest of the lyrics couldve been more connected with champagne, i dont believe champagne to be any alcoholic’s choice of drink. and one more nitpick, who likes that random piano mash at the end, anyone?

Your mom's ring in your pocket My picture in your wallet Your heart was glass, I dropped it

One for the money, two for the show I never was ready so I watch you go Sometimes you just don't know the answer 'Til someone's on their knees and asks you

tolerate it - this is a good mellow song, i can relate to the deep sadness of feeling ignored, every thing you do is just dropped. i feel this could grow on me, especially because at the end we really get that jolt of energy, i can leave, i can do it.

I wait by the door like I'm just a kid Use my best colors for your portrait

gold rush. this song is a little too sweet for me, specifically “i dont need a gold rush gold rush”. its just an upbeat and repetitive pop song. i also find this specific high school energy of really wanting someone but also despising their appeal to just not relate to the headspace im currently in.

no body no crime. whoooa that blast of country. it kind of feels weird in this album. i think the chorus is incredibly boring, “i think he did it but i just cant prove it” over and over.

No, no body, no crime But I ain't lettin' up until the day I die

closure. i cant get over the constant banging of industrial pots and pans throughout this whole song lol. i really went back and forth between do i like this, no i hate it, ok i could get used to it, no no it doesnt fit with the lyrics and how shes singing. i also dont care for “yes i got your letter, yes im doing better”.

we have a large pile of songs at the bottom, they all mush together in a sad corner. these could maybe grow on me but i also would be fine never listening to them again. with folklore’s sad songs, like epiphany or my tears ricochet, there was still something that appealed to me. most of these, there just isnt anything.

happiness - similar to tolerate it, i think the lyrics carry and convey a specific feeling very well, i have definitely felt this way, but i dont feel like the instrumentals match her emotional singing. i think she really carries this song and the instruments just let me down.

No one teaches you what to do  When a good man hurts you And you know you hurt him too

marjorie - i feel like a song about her grandmother could have been so great instead we get “what died didnt stay dead” over and over and a bridge that is mostly about herself. “shouldve kept every grocery store receipt cause every scrap of you would be taken from me” is the worst of the lines, thats what you want to keep? grocery receipts? the song should be about her grandmother leaving all her “backlogged dreams” to her, and im not getting much of that.

cowboy like me - takes one... to... know... one...... this song does not embody  the type of cowboy shes talking about, perhaps a 80 year old woman singing about her tendencies to run away. im not convinced taylor is singing from a place she understands enough about. my least favorite line in the album goes to “the tennis court was covered up with some tent-like thing”. tent like thing? lol ok. although i will say one of my favorite lines is “forever is the sweetest con”, but that gem cannot save this song.

dorothea - this is the worst version of seven from folklore. its about ten times less interesting, very bare bones, hardly any story or background information. i dont particularly like the name dorothea. giving me major grandma vibes, these last three songs are major grandma vibes. 

[familiar-foxx]

Something Blue

I'm not quite sure what is compelling me to write this. Perhaps it's because its late, I cant sleep, and my feelings are running high. My anti-depressants kicked in today, and I've been in a good mood for the first time in a long time. So all of these words are coming from a good place. Theres no bitterness. I say all of this with the utmost tenderness.

Im going to start living. Im going to start painting again. And singing. I think Ill learn to play the violin. Im going to continue to learn French. I'm going to go outside, and breathe in the fresh air everytime like its the first time. I'm going to chase my dreams finally. I'm going to start a youtube. I'm going to see more movies, and Im going to call my mom every week if I can. I'm going to spend time with my fiancee. Im going to love him the way he deserves to be loved. And Im going to do it often.

Im not going to think about who has hurt me. Im not going to wonder why they left. I'm not going to think about my dad. Or my former friends. Or my ex. Or my mom. I forgive all of them. Finally. For good. For all the tears that I've shead, and the restless nights. The panic attacks, and the stress. For all the pain that seemed so unbearable sometimes, I thought it was going to kill me. I let go of it all. Every one, and everything that came with loving them for what seemed like nothing for so long. Now...I dont regret a thing. Every person, I've come to find, is exactly who I needed at the time. My dad abandoned me. More than once. He chose a toxic relationship over me. He hasnt tried to contact me in 7 years....but he showed me movies. He took me to the cinema every week. He showed me what dreams are made of. He's the reason I want to be an actress. I could never thank him enough for that.

My former friends left without explanation. Nights filled with laughter, and tv shows, and drinking way too young suddenly meant nothing to some. Shaniece, and Larry stung the most. But I wouldn't have traded those nights for the world. I had the time of my life. And they broke me out of my shell, to become who I am now. Because of that, I had the courage to meet the best people, and friends. And Im beyond grateful for that.

My mom destroyed my life in many ways. Shes quite possibly the reason I have such bad anxiety. She has stolen money from me, from Ben, from my brothers. She has put us into horrible situations that we almost didnt escape from. She has chosen men, money, and material things over her kids sometimes. But I know what I dont want to be. I know how to love my future children, because she has taught me how not to love them. She is still, the person I go to for advise. Because despite everything, shes the smartest person I've ever known.

Erik broke my heart. He made me feel unlovable. And too much. He made me feel like I wasnt enough. I stayed up so, so many nights, wondering what I could have done better, or differently. Was I obnoxious? Was I ugly? Was I not thin enough, was my mental illness too much to handle? I tried so hard. Did so much. Was it too much? I cried a lot for a long time. And up until perhaps this very moment...I never got over it. But let me tell you...those were some of the best memories of my life. I knew it then, but I especially see it now...that he couldnt have come in my life at a more perfect time. Sure. It was hard. But that was such a dark and hard time in my family, and home life, that I needed that to give me some light, some distraction, and happiness. I will always be grateful for him for giving me a happiness, and love when I needed it most. And when I no longer needed that...it was time to go. Its funny....because its almost like he knew. Ill always be thankful for that time. And I wish him all the success, and happiness, and love in the world. He deserves it. I just hope he learns to love himself, as much as I did.

Im going to start living. And that means putting to rest so many grudges, and hurtful memories. Because at the end of the day, if nothing else, people, and experiences come into your life for one beautiful reason or another. Maybe its cliche. But perhaps it can be all sumed up in one phrase; dont cry because its over, smile because it happened. And I am oh so glad it happened. Every single thing, and person. They have brought me right here. And right here is beautiful. And right here is where my life really begins.

[kayawagner]

The Five Minute Bard: Resources to Create Sharp Concepts in No Time Flat

Image Courtesy of Pixabay “I’d like to teach the world to sing, but they’re all tone deaf.”

If your table is anything like mine, bards are primarily known for romancing their way out of combat encounters, only to have to then combat their way out of those romance encounters when plans inevitably go awry. There’s nothing wrong with that if your group enjoys following the exploits of your own personal pratfalling Mata Hari, but bards have a lot of potential to deepen gameplay in other ways. This article explores a few ways that bards can uniquely add to your game.

Musical Plot Lines

All over the world, since long before the advent of widespread literacy, song, poetry, and performance have been used to remember the history of nations and heroes; there’s no reason why in games such epics (and the rascals who know them well) can’t provide context for the rivalry between royal families, hints about the weaknesses of an ancient evil stirring after centuries of slumber, or even direct instructions as to how to make it through a trapped dungeon. Fantasy writers from J. R. R. Tolkien all the way to George R. R. Martin and N. K. Jemisin continue to use ancient stories, songs, and phrases in this way to flesh out the worlds of their novels (in particular, Jemisin’s Stone Lore could drive an entire campaign just by itself).

Songs are great for this purpose, as they can be scattered earlier in a campaign (or even a session) in the background, providing foreshadowing or clues for players without necessarily being obvious about doing so.

…[songs] can be scattered earlier in a campaign (or even a session) in the background, providing foreshadowing or clues for players without necessarily being obvious about doing so.

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For a non-fantasy example, Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson did a great job with his “Dead Man’s Chest” song. The few lines from the novel were later expanded into a poem/song by Young E. Allison, and it’s well worth listening to the whole tune if you ever need to populate a sunken pirate ship with a bunch of undead with distinct and gruesome wounds.

As much fun as Treasure Island is though, my favorite source for musical inspiration will always be the Roud Folk Song Index. This catalog of English-language folk songs has tens of thousands of entries tailor-made for the fantasy gaming table, though many of the songs have topics and language that you may not want at your table. These songs have the advantage of usually being just obscure enough for your players to not already be familiar with them, but omnipresent enough to be vaguely familiar — songs as recent and popular as “The Streets of Laredo” and “Scarborough Fair” descend directly from entries in this index.

���songs as recent and popular as “The Streets of Laredo” and “Scarborough Fair” descend directly from entries in [the Roud Folk Song Index]. 

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If you want to jump in right away, my favorite songs from the early list are “Three Ravens/Twa Corbies,” “Two Sisters/The Wind and Rain,” “Cruel Lincoln,” “The Elfin Knight,” and “The Female Highwayman.” Any one of these songs can pretty much be dropped into a campaign unchanged to add a subplot or additional character, and it’s well worth diving into them — at the end of this article are a couple of resources to help you do so if you want.

Tactical Cacophony: the Music of Battle

In most if not all tabletop games, bards are simultaneously performers and magic wielders, capable of turning the tide of battle with either their music or their spells. This role is well-supported by old legends about bards, though like most low-level bards in modern games, apparently they spent much of their time insulting rats to death.

…like most low-level bards in modern games, apparently [mythological bards] spent much of their time insulting rats to death. 

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For a more grounded approach, you can also consider bringing in more martial applications of music. Horns, fifes (single-tube pipes), drums, and bagpipe music are all well-known accompaniments to ancient battles, providing everything from marching cadence to tactical signaling. These real-world examples can be a great illustration of and justification for Bardic Inspiration and similar powers for those groups that prefer to have detailed or evocative descriptions of these powers in action.

More spectacularly, bards may have access to instruments that serve a secondary function as weapons (or vice-versa). Using real world examples, bards could be familiar with a shakuhachi or a musical bow. The shakuhachi is a nearly two-foot-long flute with a heavy, bulbous tip. Played as a form of meditation, by some accounts, this instrument could also be used as an effective bludgeoning weapon, making it easier to smuggle into areas where characters are expected to disarm.

Musical bows are either dedicated instruments or converted hunting bows that are also a stringed percussion instrument with the addition of a resonator.

Of course, if your DM is more whimsical (or forgiving), bards always have the option of a flamethrower guitar or a guitar shotgun (if your group allows the guitar shotgun, let me know if you’re looking for a player).

Extra Credit: Bringing Custom Music to the Table

Okay, to be clear, obsession with bards aside, I have all the musical and rhythmic talent of a harmonica in a clothes dryer. The last time I tried to sing in public, the guy running the karaoke turned off my mic.

…I have all the musical and rhythmic talent of a harmonica in a clothes dryer. The last time I tried to sing in public, the guy running the karaoke turned off my mic. 

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Originally, I was going to try to learn how to play the ukulele and re-do “Twa Corbies” for this article, but apparently, you can only learn that instrument in an hour if you have some minuscule fraction of ability to begin with. I have never been so disappointed in Amanda Palmer (NSFW language in video).

If you (unlike me) know one end of a musical instrument from another, doing something cool and ambitious like writing alternate lyrics to something from the Roud Folk Song Index would probably be pretty awesome. But if you can already do that, you probably wouldn’t be reading something called “The Five Minute Bard,” so let’s move on, shall we?

For those of us who don’t already have a great deal of ability, but want to come up with fun little tunes for our gaming groups, there’s something called Common Meter or Ballad Meter “tune swapping.” Songs using common meter (and there are a lot of them) use the same rhythm and rhyme patterns, meaning they can easily be swapped out for one another. This can be a fun party trick (singing Emily Dickinson’s “Because I Could Not Stop for Death” to the tune of the “Gilligan’s Island” theme is a hoot no matter how you look at it), but it also means you have a library of tunes and lyrics you can swap out with one another without any of your players realizing it. Here is an interactive example. A small selection of songs or poems in ballad meter is below:

“Greensleeves”

“God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen”

“I Just Can’t Wait to be King” from “The Lion King”

“The House of the Rising Sun”

“Oh, Susanna”

“Yankee Doodle”

“America the Beautiful”

“Amazing Grace”

“The Yellow Rose of Texas”

Pretty much any famous Emily Dickinson poem

The Pokemon Season 1 theme song

So with that in mind: a super quick-and-dirty (and entirely untested) method for creating music for your group:

Identify what you want to sing about.

Identify a tune you like, or a couple of them from the list above. Mash them together or hum them until you’re comfortable with the results.

Shamelessly raid the lyrics of the other songs in the list for turns of phrase you like, and shoehorn them in.

Where necessary, swap out words to hide the source of your song or create new rhymes. If you’re looking for a quick and dirty way to hide clumsy rhymes, be sure to use the word you’re trying to rhyme with as the second word, and the clumsy imperfect word as the first one. So if you’re trying to rhyme with “mockery,” but can’t think of anything to rhyme it with other than “crockery”, you would do something like “The battle raged among the crockery/until the villain lost through vicious mockery” (Thanks to Rachel F. for that hot tip).

Bask in the admiration of your gaming group. Or dodge thrown shoes, depending on your level of ability and the patience of your adventuring party.

Bards aren’t everyone’s favorite character class, but for those of us prone to a certain amount of mischief and scenery-chewing, they’re just too much fun to pass up. Hopefully some of these tools make it to your table, whether in the form of new tools for your bards to use, or in musically-themed adventures.

For those of you who play bards in your own games (or cringe at others who do), what do the bards in your home game bring to the table that no one else does? How do you make your games more musical?

Resources:

Every Folk Song: a podcast that promises to go through every song on the Roud Folk Song Index until the host gets tired of doing so — even though it only gets to song 11 (“The Baffled Knight”) it’s still a darn good podcast.

My personal Spotify playlist for the Roud Folk Song Index. This is a selection of my favorite versions of some of the first songs in the Roud Folk Song Index.

Learn to Play the Ukulele: Maybe you’ll do better than I did? Let me know your secret if you do.

Rhyming Dictionary: Because most of us can’t rhyme “the elves are attacking” without a little bit of Internet help.

The Five Minute Bard: Resources to Create Sharp Concepts in No Time Flat published first on https://supergalaxyrom.tumblr.com

[deaduwus]

ajah, i miss you

@yunxnation

if you're ajah or as i usually call you yunx, please keep on reading. this is probably overkill as i messaged you, but i noticed on the mobile website you can't find the message notification when i tested it out. i should have done this so much earlier.

I miss you so much. everytime i look at the screenshots of our conversations or even the conversations on hangouts or quotev, i feel like crying. you know that feelings haven't really been something I'm accustomed to, but in your disappearance I've grown used to them. i just want to talk to you again, though I don't think it'll be possible anymore. you've been offline for so long on Tumblr and everywhere else. on geeking, your account has become classified as inactive by the app and now has an _80 at the end. I'm afraid that one day you'll disappear again, but in your trace rather than your presence. the only good thing is that your influence can't disappear, and while I'm grateful for that, i want you here, more than anything else, in my life. even though you're not here, you're on my mind everyday. sometimes my head gets so full of worry and what ifs that you're actually dead or hurt and anything bad that i cant focus for the entire day or week. my biggest fear now is no longer me not being able to assimilate into society but you forgetting me. I'm sorry if it's creepy or pressuring, but the entire universe can forget of my existence and I'd be alright; it is only you that affects me. I'm sorry definitely that you mean so much to me; you probably didn't think you matter/ed so much to me. in all honesty, I'm still clinging to when you said i was the most important to you-- pathetic, right? but that phrase you maybe didn't mean is now one of the only string of words that comfort me nowadays.

you did so much more to help me than you know.

I'm only rambling now, but i dont know what else to do. try to prove my identity? explain all of the attempts i made to regain contact that has stretched for months now? self deprecate and try to vent to a person who might not even return to this account ever again? describe all of my hopes and dreams that are going to fail?

I am filled with many regrets. as soon as you first vanished in february, i should've given you all of the contacts i possess and had you write them down somewhere safe. i should've told you how much you meant to me and reminded you of it every single moment we got to spend together. i should've listened more than talk. i should've asked for contact information too(though you probably would've rejected, and that's okay). even though your dad blamed me, i would've been happy calling him and being lectured or hung up on if it meant i had a chance.

I don't even live in urban florida anymore, now i live in suburban georgia. things have really changed, and i have too. when i look back on the screenshots I wonder how you dealt with me. I was really cringe worthy. i remember so many promises we made-- you probably have forgotten most of them by now. i still remember being on the bus to school at 6 am in eighth grade and urging you to sleep since it was 3 am for you. the compromise was that i would start eating three meals a day if you got at least five hours of sleep a day. it meant the world to me at the time, but even then, because of my own self destruction during the summer, i almost stopped eating entirely. with how busy nikea was, i didn't have any friends to lean on. i still had your words though and clung on. i don't know where i would be right now if i didn't have them. i remember when we spoke of what would happen if one of us died during the funeral proceedings of my grandmother's death in april, and you assured you wouldn't throw the memory of me away. a similar incident was earlier in the year, when i said I'd like to be able to send a necklace to you because i was afraid that without a physical reminder of me, you'd think i was only a figment of your imagination. you told me you'd always remember me. i felt sincerity in your words and a small bit of doubt in my own ability to capture the same enthusiasm about recounting my personality. on less serious events, i remember telling you of when my ringtone(you singing ponponpon) went off in class, and you being embarrassed while asking me why. I found the reaction adorable and teased you. I can remember making dirty jokes with you about original characters and ships. I remember you speaking about your acne that blends into your skin when you sent me a picture of your haircut somewhere in late 2016. i remember laughing with you over my message NUTNUT. I remember, i remember, i remember-- there are all these events, but you are the memory i remember the most vividly. you have been, are, and forever will be the person most brilliant and shining in my mind, whether you or I want it or not. I wonder if I sound whimsical.

Again, I love you-- I love you so much. I owe you so much and have repaid so little. I can only hope you're reading this, but even if you aren't, I love you anyways. Even though it has been almost a year since I've heard from you, I love you so much.

I see you in my dreams sometimes. One time, you put your hand on my shoulder and told me things were going to be alright. Another incident, we were just texting and you were typing up jokes you had thought of while you were gone. I wake up with streaks of tears on my face every single time(there have been more occurrences), and my sister even asked me at one point if I needed to go to an asylum. Though, maybe I do need to. Surely, this sort of fixation is unhealthy. You're probably creeped out by me; I know I would choose never to reply to me by now. But I'm stuck and I can't find the strength to move on from you. You most likely have moved on from me even then. You were always more able than me. You've always been a shimmering diamond in my eyes. I know I've said this too many times by now, but I love you more than any language in this universe can describe.

I've grown up a bit and matured. I've started becoming more detached from reality and I've managed to close myself off some more. I thought I'd get better since I no longer have you to rely on, but instead I feel lonely and even more lost now. Maybe it's best you don't come back. Maybe I'll be forced to rely on someone else and learn that way. But I don't want to. If you are not the person I return to, I have no desire to return to any person or being. You are special to me and you will forever remain that way. No one can even come close to you. No one can serve as a substitute for you. I wear both of the necklaces from the set where I wanted to send you one, so that if I ever get to send it you, maybe you'll be able to feel me through it. I've become a true fool. I'm sorry. None of these paragraphs make sense anymore. I want and I want and I want, but does it even mean anything anymore? I have so little chance of you reading this it's most likely no use. But I can only try, and I'm trying my hardest for you. Is my dedication too much? Are my motives too shady? Are they too disgusting? What are they even? Before you came into my life, I was much more organized and able to carry out my life. Now, I'm a wreck who can't even work up the courage to test out your numbers in fear of someone who isn't you picking up, or the disappointment in the owner not being you. I'm the biggest coward I know now. But I desire this way and path because of the fact you crossed fates with me in it. I missed my shot by not checking your Tumblr during the summer. I just kept sending letters that got sent back. I'm just hoping to whatever force there is that miraculously you'll check your account in a month. It looks like you probably won't be able to come back until maybe next summer.

I swore I'd never tell you my age, but I'm fifteen now! I'm the age you were when you met me! And now you're seventeen. One more year! I love you. Back to what I was gonna talk about in the last paragraph. Because I've grown a bit, I'm now someone who I can consider as somewhat worthy to stand by your side. I'm now 5'5 too! I wonder how tall you are now.

I love you.

601-595-0127 is my mothers number.

813-517-7616 is my number.

813-517-6347 is my sisters number.

I'll wait forever for you. <3

I'm sroryy for the wait.

Happy belated birthday!!