#WHICH. TBH. IS EXACTLY WHY I STARTEF DOING IT

[its--ali]

man this morning I was all set to be Super Annoyed with myself for succumbing to retail therapy and buying more nail polish but considering how fucking FAST they've all sold out I Actually Regret Nothing. Like God fucking damn

[bitatulipa]

ugh i wish 'family' would understand that their threats dont exactly motivate me

they just scare me and make me feel incredibly unsafe fjsbdbd

like wtf is wrong with these shitheads

that 'father' is uhhh well an abusive piece of garbage and doesn't deserve to live tbh

like who the fuck threatens their child to throw them on the street?????? like it's so confusing

they want me to clean my room up so they can renovate the bathroom which is next to my room and i should i guess move to the other bedroom which is hardly empty and also the floor in that room is even more crooked/slanted

and all of their bedrooms are under and above me so that's ugh since they either snore or talk loudly or put on loud 'music'

and they also need to clean up the room under my bedroom since they want to turn the kitchen under the bathroom into a bathroom dnsnd and like they havent done anything with that room??

and they are being angry about my room??

which makes no sense because if that room under me isnt cleaned up they cant exactly do anything with the bathroom stuff

and first my 'mother' told me that the room under me needed to be cleaned up for that stuff and now my 'father' says my room also fjsbdb within a month! and then my 'brother' agrees with him when i get angry at him and then when they leave to go outside because they went to some restaurant for my 'brother' his birthday he says bye and i tell him fuck off and he gets surprised that im angry dhsbdbd

and i didnt go with them because well they're shitheads and i hate restaurants :)

restaurants are sensory nightmares and with abusive family that doesn't really improve

oh well ugh

and that weird conversation started because my 'father' said or suggested that he'd wake me up tomorrow on monday at twelve pm to "help" me with cleaning up my bedroom??? and like what

his "help" means nothing since he never listens to anything i say ://

so i guess i wont sleep tonight and I'll just clean till those shitheads cant do anything

guess I'll have to put stuff in trash bags and put stuff under my bed and make sure it doesnt "smell" which is probably just perfume or aloe vera deodorant

also for some reason that 'father' smells?? like he thinks washing hands after going to the toilet is an optional thing so he's gross anyway but he just smells bad like idk why maybe it's because of the not very clean thing

ugh i hate cishet men

and yesterday at night hours after dinner i went to eat something since I'd stayed in the kitchen with the cats etc and my 'mother' was outside with a friend and then go 'home' right after thankfully my 'brother' went outside somewhere (although he left something on in the attic because there was some buzzing noise from the attic) and she asked what i was doing and after a while just startef judging me and being evil like always but then after going upstairs she went downstairs to make tea and said sorry??? like apologised?? that's a first sorta

like she actually said it's a bad trait of her fjsbdbdbd

and i was just surprised and ofc i mean like i dont need to forgive her and why would i

one apology after almost two decades fjsbdbd