#WHAT IS MY TYPE VISH

[chinzhilla]

get to know me 🌻

thank for the tag vish @morkofday!! 🩷 these were fun questions

do you make your bed? usually, but often not until a few hours after i wake up cause the dog is still snoozing under the covers

what's your favorite number? i really don't think i have one. maybe 7, although i feel like that's cliche

what is your job? i'm a legal assistant

If you could go back to school would you? if i could attend lessons without having to take out another loan or stress about work i have no interest in, then yes absolutely. but i have no desire to go back to school in the traditional sense

can you parallel park? sigh. no not really and it's a problem. it's the one aspect of driving that i really struggle with

a job you had that would surprise people? my first job was as a hostess for one of the most historic and high-end restaurants in my city. it had been closed for years and reopened the summer after i graduated high school. my friend's mom had connections and basically got us jobs there. i couldn't wait tables though cause i was only 17 and thus couldn't serve alcohol

do you think aliens are real? definitely, just not necessarily humanoid ones

can you drive a manual car? i learned on a manual but haven't driven one in like ten years so idk

what's your guilty pleasure? i don't believe in feeling guilty about pleasure so i will say a pleasure that i often regret for physiological reasons: dairy

tattoos? i have an ouroboros in the center of my upper back. desperate for more but. money :(

favorite color? blush pink or maroon

favorite type of music? i've been on a kpop (and pop in general) kick since december, but that's kind of a new thing for me (life has been stressful the last few months and i think i like that the music is largely upbeat and i don't have to worry about the lyrics hitting too hard lol). historically alt/indie rock has been my go-to genre. generally i prefer stuff that's high-energy, not so much the slow, contemplative stuff

do you like puzzles? not sure if this means jigsaw puzzles specifically, in which case not really. i love word puzzles and brainteasers though

any phobias? spiders :(

favorite childhood sport? i did not do sports as a child lol but i was in kung fu classes for like 8 years

do you talk to yourself? allllll the time. ALL the time

what movie(s) do you adore? the lotr trilogy, the princess bride, arrival, the blair witch project, pan's labyrinth, mamma mia, and the parent trap (lindsay lohan version) to name a few

coffee or tea? coffee, although i do love tea

first thing you wanted to be growing up: a singer i think

tagging: @withingerly @markpakin @supanuts @nick-nellson @firstkanaphans @aylinaliens @khaopybara @pharawee - if y'all wanna, no pressure ✨

[highdio]

It's mildly disappointing that DIO hates his mother too. I was hoping that wouldn't be canon, though I can understand the reasoning behind it.

Still no bday either lmao. And Araki forgot the ear moles??

I haven't seen the raw text yet but according to Vish in the replies thread, Araki did this as a retcon, saying "rather than 'I hate my dad but I love my mom,' I made it 'I also despise my mom who was devoted to such a horrid father.'" Araki prepared the chart specifically for a fandom mag so I don't think the take is canon (like @SaejimaFanatic puts it in the same thread, death of the author and all).

EDIT: also anon lol I missed the part of your ask about the ear moles! Yeah I think he may have been in a rush (I mean, he is writing a new Jojo Part idk what they want from this man!) when he filled out the chart.

No birthday is actually an important Dio thing: Araki left out some key details like this in the manga to keep an aura of mystery and intrigue to Dio, it’s something he says he learned from the Holmes novels. It’d be fun to actually get a birthday/blood type but I’m kind of glad he didn’t give us this.

[thasorns-archive]

9 Fandom Peeps to Get to Know Better

I was tagged by again the lovely vish @puppy-phum and wonderful rae @yakdee. Thank you so much <3

3 Ships You Like: I know ppl has stopped talking about them because the actors had a fall out *cough* but my ult ship probably would be ManType (hate me for it). Aoki and Ida. Tinn and Gun.

First Ship Ever: before I even know what shipping was, I remember that I liked Frankie and Matthew from 'The Sleepover Club'. I even read fanfictions about them. Idk if anyone even remembers this show lol

Last Song You Heard: Sabrina Carpenter - Taste I wanted to bring you through memory lane with a skam song BUT I made this post yesterday and didn't published it so new day new song

Favourite Childhood Book: Zahrah the Windseeker. If you ever come across this book READ IT, I beg you. It's wonderful and I still can remember how I got soaked into the book and could visualize all the things on how the book is written.

Currently Reading: Ellbogen by Fatma Aydemir IF only some of y'all would understand German and read her novel... her previous novel I read is also very relatable but this one... a young girl with migration background tells about her story about how her parens came to Germany, how she tries to find herself and her 'home' between the cultures. I'm still not far in the book but it's CHEF'S KISS. I can't wait to see it visualised on stage

Currently watching: Due to my busy schedule (and being currently on vacation) I can't/don't find the time to watch more dramas (which surprises me though) - 4 Minutes, Cosmetic Playlover, Good Partner, Love Next Door, SunsetxVibes (asked myself three episodes ago why it's still on my watching list), Terror Tuesday: Extreme, The Loyal Pin. I really want to start with First Note of Love, The Frog and The On1y One. There's another kdrama coming out 'The Devil Judge' can't wait for it

Currently consuming: dk the sun lol. Since I balance my working time (uni stuff), help and spend time with my grandparents and watch my dramas it's really balanced out and I'm less stressed. In fact I'm spending a lot of time at the beach and watch the sunset. It's truly a different feeling and different air you breathe a more relaxed one

Currently craving: ramen. yeah there's a specific type here in Türkiye which Germany doesn't have and I bought it two weeks ago but never could find the time to eat it

tagging: @pondsphuwin @jimmysea @milkpansa

[puppy-phum]

bad buddy fandom getting-to-know-you meme!

(created by @fiercynn)

thank you for tagging me vi @disasterbabygirlnick and sorry i'm so late!

note: i consider "fanworks" to pretty much everything people create related to a fandom, including but not limited to meta/analysis/discussion, gifs, fanvids/edits/fancams, filk, fanart, fanfic, fan food, fan crafts, etc. please include this note with the meme unless you have a different definition!

name and whatever you want to share about yourself

vish, 25, demi/bi, from finland. lately been thinking about going by she/they instead of she/her. maybe even more they/she if i can put it that way.

when did you watch bad buddy/join the fandom?

i started watching the series and joined the fandom after ep 7 had aired. it all begun on my christmas break at my parents’ place where binged all the available episodes in a couple of days. my christmas was spent thinking about the rooftop kiss and how that absolutely ruined me. BB was never on my radar bc the title didn’t really intrigue me (i have bad experiences with BLs with silly titles) and i wasn’t really thinking about watching a series with ohm again, but i am so happy that tumblr dragged me in. changed my life and my perspective on BLs. and now i’m way too deep in this shit hehe

favorite ship(s)

patpran and waikorn. i adore inkpha too but mainly as a GL couple that has made me feel comfortable and seen. they never stuck with me as much. patpran are my comfort and waikorn give me extreme brainworms.

favorite character(s)

my two architecture losers aka pran and wai. pran is me, i am him. he gets it, to put it simply. wai, then again, is very my brand of blorbo, my bastard son, my horrible wet rat boy, my hissy kitten. the maker of chaos and absolutely horrible with feelings. i could fix him, i could make him worse, and i’d enjoy every moment of it.

favorite episode(s)

ep 11 for the overall bittersweet feeling. the whole episode just feels like the calm before a storm. it’s their sweet goodbye to each other despite nothing ever truly ending between them. also ep 5 for the ending part but also for pat’s journey to self-discovery.

favorite scene(s) 

from ep 5 the whole ending part: the three-way fight, the rooftop kiss, and even pran going through it at the beginning of ep 6. ep 11 shirt scene and pat thanking pran, pat in music store discovering himself, wai protecting hurt pran in the rugby game (the brainworms are real with this one), ep 12 reveal where pran comes to pat's door, hotpot double date, bar scene at the end. oh, and absolutely the fiasco that is wai trying to flirt with pha in the park while ink is there. that one's golden.

one thing you would change about the show if you could

i agree on the wai apology with you vi. it should happen as a nod towards the fact that his behavior was not ok. even if things got sorted out for patpran and even if in their world wai’s actions didn’t have as dire consequences as they could have in the real world (where homophobia is very real), the viewers should get shown that he acknowledges his wrongdoings and that patpran deserve a proper apology from someone like him. ALSO PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LET WAIKORN BE TOGETHER P’AOF AM UNDER YOUR BED

what are some of your favorite fanworks made by other people

tried to gather some type of list and probably missed so many but at least these:

[x] bad buddy rewatch episode edits by @baifengxis ♥ [x] all this type of random bb gifs (the coloring in all of them is stunning!) [x] this patpran in ep 11 edit [x] patpran + rooftop edit + many other edits bc the style is just stunning, all by @pranink ♥ [x] patpran spiderman au [x] gifted buddy set for my bday both by the amazing @dimpledpran ♥ love you! [x] this lovely just friend? -edit by @/coldties ♥ [x] patpranmusic series by @bevioletskies ♥ [x] this inkpha edit by @akingyouniverse ♥ [x] pran as favourite character [x] favorite patpran moments both made by @nanons who always nails the colors ♥ [x] this super cool just friend? mv edit by @prany ♥ [x] how to get the girl guide by @weiwuxian ♥ [x] this celestial patpran set [x] favorite episode: episode 7 set made with pure magic by @raypakorn ♥ [x] favorite scene: main six at the bar by @dramaism ♥ [x] architecture gang by @mantrisanu ♥ [x] the most amazing bb photobooth art by @/thatgothsamurai ♥ [x] this stunning yet heartbreaking patpran set by @guntapon ♥ [x] inkpha + taylor swift's mastermind [x] best dynamic: person a + person b [x] patpran + distance [x] patpran and the fleeting happiness in ep 11 [x] bb study in film noir [x] bb/patpran ft. the old guard all by my forever inspiration and muse @oswlld ♥ i miss you!

(if you create fanworks) what are your favorite fanworks that you’ve made?

oh yes i managed to make a ton of edits for this show (and still sometimes do), so here are a couple of personal favorites:

[x] patpran + the desire for reassurance [x] patpran + sea of strangers [x] patpran + i had you (what if it all was just a dream) [x] this patpran soulmates edit [x] patpran as sun & moon [x] patpran's love through the season (my peak imo) [x] patpran + signposts (another peak but for different style) [x] my otp: patpran [x] fighter pran [x] the real five love languages [x] pran's life anthem: i won't say (i'm in love)

i've spent so much time and effort making all of my edits for bb and i don't regret any of it. i've had so much fun and met so many amazing ppl through them ♥ thank you!

a song that makes you think of bbs (the ones in the show don’t count lol)

i didn’t have a much of a playlist for BB outside of the songs in the show but maybe: if god had a boat by anyma, are you with me by nilu, and my oasis by sam smith. (i was very focused on not me during this period when it comes to music, so i associate most songs with that instead.)

idk anything else you want us to know?

i think the next edit I need to make for bb is a wai text post meme bc for some reason i haven't made one yet??? so see you there!!

tagging: idk who has done this already bc i'm so late but @dimpledpran @mantrisanu @oswlld @nanons @machikeita @milkpansa @icouldhyperfixatehim @thanawins @seanwhites @i-got-the-feels @patspran @nongnaos ♥

[byte-the-bullet]

The world outweighs us (Ch1)

We eventually come across a clearing-it’s so strange. The grass here is black-with white stripes too, and a metal barrier that’s pretty easy to walk around. I step on the weird grass-it’s… hard? I touch it-it feels like rough stones held in some kind of bigger rock. Sanji immediately pulls me away from the grass-“What are you thinking?! It could be toxic! It’s from the otherworld!” He is trying not to make me panic, but I know it’s not toxic-it’s just weird grass made of tiny rocks-I grabbed his hand and pressed it against the grass. He seems shocked, and murmurs a simple-“What is this stuff..?” We both raise, I poke one of the white lines and it feels the same as the black rock did. I’ve decided-this is not grass, it’s rock. We both stare at each other, then begin to follow the rock pathway. We come across a strange structure, a church maybe? It doesn’t look like one, there’s strange stuff in the structure too-“Vish, it’s witchcraft!” I hear Sanji yelp, and walk over-the doors to this place open on their own-this has to be witchcraft, it can’t be anything else-we both begin to panic but Sanji breathes in and steadies himself-I watch him enter the witch’s hut and begin to pray. Please, don’t do anything stupid-please Sanji. “Vish! There’s a lady in here and she’s wearing weird stuff!” I immediately rush in, there’s a small woman behind a barricade with some kind of wiggly glass attached-she looks at us like we’re some kind of animals, but she’s the witch here-her clothes look so strange, her hair has teal tips too? She leans back against the wall, and we both stare. “What are you?” Sanji asks the lady, and her eyebrow raises in confusion. “I work here..? What do you mean ‘What’ am I? Hey-wait, are you two cosplayers or something..?” She says this, her black hair is in a ponytail and her skin is tanned-her eyes are a blue color, and she looks very underfed-I can see her stomach from where her pink cloth is covering her chest down to the strange material her skirt is made of-it looks like cotton material but it’s white and looks stretchy too. She leans forward a little and Sanji stares, his head tilted slightly. “What‘s a cosplayer? Is it a type of witch?” Sanji says, then continues speaking-“You look underweight, and your clothes are strange too-are you an otherworld resident of some kind?” Sanji speaks to her and I begin to look around-there’s weird stuff everywhere, I recognize some of it from the scraps I found in the forest-I remember the pastor saying these things were cursed. The lights here are weird too, are they keeping flames as pets on the ceiling? How dare they be so reckless. “Otherworld resident? What the hell-listen, I’m done with your crazy games or whatever but please either tell me who you are or leave!” I hear the lady yell, I’ve never heard a woman yell before-it’s strange. Usually most women in church keep quiet even when spoken about. “I’m Sanji, this is Vish. We’re from the south section of our region.” Sanji speaks and the woman looks rather confused. “Sanji? Vish? Are you even from America? Your names sound weird. Anyways, I’m Page.” She flicks her hair, and I walk over-why does she insist on showing her stomach? Can’t she put on different clothes? Do otherworld residents all dress so… Immodestly? I noticed something-shiny rocks hanging from her ears? I point at the rocks, “What are those?” I ask, and Sanji begins holding my hand. “These? They’re diamond earrings, my friend Hayley got them for me.” Page replies to my question, she seems a lot more relaxed and actually rather amused. “Vish, don’t ask random questions, we may offend her.” Sanji reminds me, despite him having asked her many random questions of his own-and I immediately ask-“Page, can I ask questions?” She giggles a little bit and nods. I’ve never heard a lady giggle either-she’s so strange. “Alright but nothing creepy, and I’m allowed to ask you questions too.” Page says, leaning under the wiggly glass barrier she was hiding behind.

“What are the clothes you’re wearing?” I immediately ask-not giving Sanji a chance to tell me off. “This? It’s just a shirt and workout skirt. It’s what‘s in style right now.” Page says with upmost confidence and I immediately reply-“What do you mean in style?” Sanji cuts off the conversation, by turning me around-almost immediately something catches my eye and I drift to a nearby item. I poke it, the bright yellow item crinkles, and the item is shiny enough to be considered a treasure. I immediately grabbed it. The item reads ‘Lars’. It’s fascinating, and there’s quite a few of these items-they weigh basically nothing, and I attempt to bite the item-only to realize it’s filled with air-and some kind of crunchy thing. Mostly air, though. I immediately spotted something else to play with-it’s shiny, and reflective. I can see my appearance in it, I’m thin and unfortunately effeminate, my ginger hair is complemented with steely gray eyes-and I’m very pale. I could easily pass as a woman if not for my hair being cut short and unusually messy. I look weird, no wonder the pastor makes me the center of attention. I take the time to fix my uniform, and smile-I look like a woman. I dislike this. I’m male. I should ask Sanji what he does to make himself look so... I’m pulled away from the shiny object by an unknown woman-no-wait, it’s just Page. She’s escaped her wiggly glass prison and is now dragging me outside.

I’m too busy being mad about looking like a girl to notice her talking to me-then I spot it. And I run straight for it. Page giggles a little and Sanji approaches "Hey... What's that?" Sanji speaks softly, now pointing at a large metal being-we share a glance as I approach it, Sanji begins to pray for my safety as I poke the metal creature. It seems to be asleep, or maybe it's dead? No, it doesn't smell dead... Page chimes in-“It’s just a car…” Me and Sanji both stare at Page, I can only imagine how stupid we look to her-but this shiny, giant, silver metal creature is twice her size and she simply calls it a ‘car’? I poke the glass on this ‘car’ thing, it’s not wiggly like the glass Page was behind. “What’s a car?” Sanji asks politely, I scowl at him playfully and he ignores me-“Oh, so when I ask-“ I try to say but am cut off by Sanji, “Vish, no.” He scolded me like a kiddie! How dare he, oh-I’ll get him for that! Page explains some stuff to Sanji while I plot my revenge. I don’t know or care what they’re saying, I found something shiny! No-no, don’t get sidetracked. Never mind, Sanji didn’t mean it-time to get that shiny thing… I pull it from the ground-a coin? I sometimes see these, it’s otherworld currency-the pastor says they’re cursed and to give them to him but I don’t think it’s cursed, I’ve done a lot of unholy or cursed things and escaped punishment-not to mention me and Sanji running away from our brides today. “Vish-“ Sanji tugs on my uniform and pulls me into the ‘car’. “-come on, Page is taking us somewhere safe.” I lean on Sanji a little, if he trusts Page and this ‘car’ then I trust Page and this car. Sanji is warm, and he smells like pine. 

(For reference, Vish’s thoughts are meant to be just as hyper and childish as he is, especially when he’s excited.)

[i-am-just-a-kiddo]

ten favorite characters from ten different things

i was tagged by @vishcount, thank you dear 💖

i’m listing characters from shows i’ve watched in 2021 so far, otherwise this tag game would be impossible to finish. there is no specific order. am also following your example and putting some song for them? it’s usually just smth i associate with them.

tagging @intyalote​, @sassyassassy​, @the-cloud-whisperer​, @cortue and @isabellaofparma​ - as always, no pressure! just thought you might wanna scream abt your faves

excuse my rambling:

Matteo Florenzi / DRUCK

well, where do i start? choosing one character from druck is so incredibly difficult. i wanted to put david here but in the end i was torn between our mains fatou and matteo - well, here is my trash son now. i don’t know how else to put it other than he is what i was in highschool. the beauty of skam and its remakes is that they show you something so close to your own life and when i watched druck’s season 3, every episode just hit me like a damn truck. and yes, i absolutely adore david and i wish he had gotten his own season because i guess i would relate to him even more so, but matteo? is made of the same stuff as me. gosh how his struggles resonated with me, how he is so flawed but he is truly trying his best. he is such an asshole sometimes but i can’t be mad at him because i know in my worst moment’s i’ve been there too. he is so tired and so scared and in the end, he just wants to love and be accepted. 

🎵 Ich geh heut nicht mehr tanzen by AnnenMayKantereit 

Lee Rang / The Tale of the Nine Tailed

  this list is going to include a lot of questionable characters but let’s start here, shall we? honestly, i don’t even think he is questionable, i simply adore him with all my heart. going into this show, i did not expect to be absolutely destroyed by his story and the bond he shares with his big brother. lee rang is the classic case of good person who lost their way because they were betrayed but holy shit, does it hurt? all he’s ever wanted was a family and to not be left alone and yet, life turned against him and he decided to turn against the world. i can’t think about the ending of this show without tearing up so i just want to say: when lee rang found a family, suddenly he felt like he could heal, like he could live. fuck everything. (as you see i am hurt)

🎵 Hurt by Oliver Tree

"Teh" Krittikorn Saetan / I Told Sunset About You & I Promised You the Moon

i started watching ipytm only yesterday so i can’t talk about it (except that i’ve already cried through the first two episodes goddamnit), so this is based on the perfection that is sunset. i was torn between oh and teh because both of them are so incredibly vivid and precious in their own way, but in the end i chose teh because he feels so incredibly real to me. i am completely amazed at the work the actor and the director put into his character, i think of it whenever i see him on screen. teh is a character with so many intense, overwhelming emotions and it makes him into a very multi-facetted person - in a sense that he always stays fundamentally himself, but that sometimes he just can’t control where his intense emotions will take him? sometimes i curse at him, sometimes i ache, sometimes i am so afraid for him, and in the end i smile when he smiles and i cry when he cries. he is so good, as a person and as protagonist character. i want to kiss everyone that was involved in making him real. (also i wonder if i am the only one headcanoning him as somewhere on the autism spectrum? it just screams to me and i wanna cry with love)

🎵 Mind If I Stay by KADEBOSTANY

Seo Moonjo / Strangers From Hell

here we go, my first problematic fave. my dearest bastard. my sleep paralysis demon. my mr. dentist, how i kept telling vishie while yelling about him - i’m still so sorry about that. this is the classic case of ‘god i hate that i adore this guy’ because apparently i am not immuned to sexy villains. to defend myself however, i truly think he is one of the best villains i saw in a while? he is so deeply unsettling and charming in the same breath, i adore what they have done with him. i don’t want to keep comparing this show to nbc’s hannibal but seo moonjo and hannibal just share this amazing quality of being completely, utterly deranged while sincerely loving and believing their own principles. i don’t know how to put it, but seo moonjo is not a loveless man, he is not full of hate against the whole world, instead he is convinced that the world fits into his palm and that it’s his plaything, that he simply is so much better and that no one can match him. he is an ArtistTM and who can blame the man, he just wants to do his art for god’s sake. bless. i got no excuses for myself

🎵 Chlorine by Twenty One Pilots

Zhang Cha Cha / The Journey Across the Night

i used a promo picture cause i couldn’t find gifs - this show needs so much more recognition, i am sad. still want to thank vishie for introducing it to me ❤ i adore the entire main cast but gosh, cha cha ripped my heart out. i knew her actress from original sin so i had a soft spot for her from the beginning and from there it just went downhill. i think she is the best written female character i’ve seen in a c-drama (if we exclude nirvana in fire) and her story absolutely broke me. i loved the energy she brought, her bubbly and lively attitude, covering the depths she sometimes retreats to. i guess her fear of being vulnerable and open speaks to me so damn much. i felt her anger at her friends when they tried to intervene - and i am glad she opened up to them! but gosh i’ve struggled with the same and seeing it on her broke my heart. my brain is mush when it comes to her because in the end i can’t put into words why she stole my heart like this. the whole show did, and i’m so happy vish was willing to share this with me

🎵 Spiaca Krolewan - Marta Bijan

Tian Sopasitsakun / A Tale of Thousand Stars

i almost forgot about my son! i don’t know if i have much to say about him? i just enjoyed the whole journey of atots so much, i was so excited for it every week. it felt so lovely and sincere and it had so much more than just a calssic BL trope. it truly allowed to just settle into the world they built and i think tian was the perfect protagonist for that? i remember yelling about this show to vish and i’m not really sure what i said about tian but i remember i was so full of love for him and the way he was potrayed. this whole show was just so magical.

🎵 Where the sea sleeps(파도가 끝나는 곳까지) by DAY6

Zhan Junbai / Killer and Healer

i don’t fucking know mate. let’s list all the reasons i hate this guy: he is a power-hungry, manipulative, corrupt finance shark that uses all his influence to get away with everything. everything i hate in a politician, public figure, and person in power. but also i love this asshole? i guess i explain it that way: i enjoyed killer and healer a lot and i loved the other main leads and the supporting characters, but in the end this guy’s scenes captured my interest the most. doesn’t help that his tension with yu tangchun was so delicious and that he finally showed a silver of humanity when he was with him. vishie must have been tired of me constantly yelling about this shark boy while they were crying over the main couple’s angst? he is just a very interesting character and he absolutely hated that he was in love with this opera singer. secretely however, he always wished he was emperor ai and that yu tangchun was dong xian.

🎵 Bad Karma by Axel Thesleff

Nishi Yuuki / Life: Senjou no Bokura

while this entire show made me cry my heart out, i remember sobbing at this scene so much - nishi finally reaching out, allowing himself to be vulnerable, reciprocating the feelings ito is giving to him so openly. most of the characters that are on this list hold a little piece of myself but watching this character on screen exposed me in a way that felt way too real. i sort of don’t want to go into depth but if you’ve seen the show, maybe you understand what i mean. i see so much of myself in him it frightens me

🎵 Sweet Hurricane by Phum Viphurit

Wang Zhi / The Sleuth of Ming Dynasty

oh hey, my second favourite bitch. while i wish tsomd had explored their characters more in depth, what i got for wang zhi was enough to make me cry (yes i rate my affections for things by how much i cry about them). this too, was lovely to watch with vish and i remember telling them that i loved how wang zhi was the second most powerful character of this show but also the most vulnerable of them all. i love how he knows to navigate himself around, how he has this certain confidence when he faces other people, but in the end he dismisses himself in many ways. it hurts the most when he see how tang fan has this found family gathering around him and wang zhi just? knows he won’t be a part of it, even if deep down he sees how lovely and healing it is. he’s just already decided he will be alone and accepts it (not convincing tho when he refuses to leave the guy who betrays him behind, just saying. i love you)

🎵 Shahmaran by SEVDALIZA

Wen Kexing / Word Of Honor

and here he is, my favourite bitch!! i’m happy i found gifs of the scene that made me fall head over heels in love with him. it’s been months and i am still unapologetically wen kexing trash. it’s interesting how characters that live a completely different life and have a very different past than yourself feel so close, as if someone had carved them out of your chest? yeah. vishie keeps telling me i have a type and i just?? i am so confused. why does this guy make me ache so much, why do i feel so personally attacked? i could psycho-analyse myself but am not gonna do it here in front of ya’ll. other than that, who doesn’t like a sexy unhinged murderer that is a huge softie and part-time teen mom in reality. his bond with gu xiang is a specially raw spot for me. also wow, wen kexing in the novel hurts me just as much. yeah there’s no words left in my brain now, just take it. 

🎵 The Light Pt. II by BROCKHAMPTON

my brain is mush, but this was nice? i hope any of this was coherent lol. if any of you bothered to read it i congratulate you

(honorary mentions: qingming from the yin yang master, gu xiang from word of honor, tang fan from the sleuth of ming dynasty, fatou jallow from druck,  chishiya shuntaro from alice in borderland)

[snickeringdragon]

so, reposting this bc i realised reblogs dont seem to appear on searches on tumblr lmfao

lighthearted rant abt why the galarian fossil pokemon shouldnt be alive!!/pos

ill go in dex order, dracozolt-arctozolt-dracovish-arctovish

dracozolt!! the combination of the bird and drake fossils, by far the LEAST fucked up of the galarian fossils, but it still has some clear issues to point out

after analyzing the living halves AND the fossils/descriptions you can pretty easily figure out what all 4 of the halves are roughly based after, the draco half causes some confusion but after the dex states that dracozolt is herbivorous, and the front half zolt clearly being a species of small feathered dromaeosaurid like raptors (possibly something like microraptor or archeaopteryx due to the bird fossils description stating it could fly, which no dromaeosaurs did but some were thought to glide!!) and those basically all being carnivorous, we can figure out draco is the herbivorous half, leading me to believe its some type of stegosaurid now, with a front half thats carnivorous and a back half thats herbivorous thats GOT to cause some issues, not getting proper nutrition, not having proper ways to digest certain things one half needs, etc, if we go with what the dex says (which the dex is CLEARLY not very reliable for these pokemon but lets just use it here) that its herbivorous the zolt half could be receiving malnutrition and having trouble eating the correct food the center of balance!

its probably thrown off by the obvious size difference and the fact that stegosaurids are quadrapeds, while dracozolt is a biped. if it falls over its pretty fucked but thats pretty normal for large theropods tbh

there could be some issues with body temperature, but im not sure, smaller things get colder faster and bigger things get hotter faster

thats all i have to say for dracozolt!!

Arctozolt

arctozolt is the combination of the dino and bird fossils and was my first galar fossil! theyve got some VERY clear issues and a few less clear ones to address, but they are Definitely not enjoying coming back from the dead 💖

first, what IS the arcto half? judging by what we can see i think its most likely to be a type of plesiosaur, it could also be some other aquatic reptiles like ichthyosaurs but i think plesiosaurs are more likely

arctozolt is. cold. duh, the freezing half of an ice type plesiosaur and a small dromeasaur is probably leaving lil zolt pretty chilly and uncomfortable, please give them a scarf

if you take a look back at dracozolt and compare to arctozolt, youll notice the upper torso and most of the arms are inside arctos? blubber? scales? one of those two! not only does this leave the hands nearly useless it also means that if the bones, muscle, flesh, etc, are still present it could definitely cause some health issues, including messing with organs

arctozolt is CLEARLY not supposed to be walking, a terrestrial animal was combined with an aquatic one to result in uh. broken flippers probably, aquatic animals can get VERY heavy and the flippers were clearly never designed to handle that weight, its likely highly uncomfortable to walk on them and probably causes many injuries including broken bones

Dracovish

oh FUCKING boy/lh the combination of the drake and fish fossils dracovish is a NIGHTMARE of a pokemon, a head on a tail, an aquatic creature combined with a terrestrial one, a carnivore combined with an herbivore, this is my least favorite galar fossil

firstly, whats the vish half? this is the only galarian fossil you can get an exact genus for, vish is almost certainly based of dunkleosteus, a prehistoric fish that had one FUCK of a jaw!

now, as stated above the picture dracovish has the same conflicting diet issue dracozolt has, draco being an herbivore and vish most likely being a carnivore like dunkleosteus, i wont go into too much detail because i already did with dracozolt

center of balance comes up once again, i dont think i need to elaborate much but with how it just. Is. theres no way this guy walks very straight, its also fucked if it falls just like dracozolt

dracovishs head is attached to its tail, that parts obvious, but this is CERTAINLY ***HIGHLY*** uncomfortable, stegosaurid tails should NOT be bent like that as well as just the effort it most likely takes to keep it up, also its head is upside down if it actually puts its tail back down, ALSO the spiky plates on dracos tail could very well harm itself if it gets too unlucky so.

dracovish has no throat unless cara liss decided to ACTUALLY put effort into these frankensteins monsters and put a throat in the tail theres no way it can uh. really do anything, eat, breathe air, drink water, yea

speaking of breathing!! does it? have lungs? the front half of draco being cut off could make it so theres no lungs, and vish most likely doesnt even have gills and if it DID have FUNCTIONING gills thatd bring up a whole NEW issue about how this thing CANT swim, no buts it just Cant

SPEAKING of it not having specific organs, does it have a HEART??? does it???? does it???????

theres so much about dracovish i probably forgot something/srs anyways!

Arctovish

arctovish is the combination of the dino and fish fossils, and the last one of the galarian fossils!!!!!

arctovish is probably the normalest LOOKING of the galarian fossils, until you realise its. head is on upside down, the pokedex, although unreliable for these pokemon i have a reason to believe what it says here, states this:

it has "trouble eating its prey" and "breathing difficulties" caused by its flipped head

it could have issues similar to arctozolt because of the freezing ice type arcto, but i feel itd be better than arctozolts issues

so uhhh thats it! thats my whole ass essay on why the galarian fossils are in constant pain/cant Live!

i spent an hour of my life on this, please reblog it/lh

[chainofclovers]

This Way Up season 2 thoughts and feelings

We finished watching the second season of This Way Up last night (watched it in two sittings over Friday and Saturday) and I liked it a lot more than I thought I would though the season did feel uneven at times. The story also made me feel incredibly, incredibly sad, and my brain is so cluttered with thoughts that I'm not sure I'll be able to actually make sense of the show if I don't just go on and share my impressions, as scattered, self-indulgent, and based on the limited memory of a single viewing as they are.

Where was I when I was watching this season of television?

Physically, I was on the couch with my wife, repeatedly remembering and forgetting that the Olympics were happening. And so, interspersed with this deep dive into the mental health and personal and professional challenges of London-based Irish sisters Áine and Shona, I experienced some archery, skateboarding (those bros honestly seem tooooo cool to even want to come to something as embarrassingly earnest as the Olympics, but good for them!), and men's gymnastics.

Mentally, I was contemplating some significant professional (and, yes, personal in their way) life events that are neither here nor there for tumblr dot com. I was also considering the season two premiere of Ted Lasso and my fannish relationship to that show. For it is true--the person I was while watching season 1 of This Way Up is not the same person who watched season 2 this weekend, because in the meantime a 45-year old white man from Kansas (and every person he knows) managed to become my primary media preoccupation, and I am surprisingly chill about how not chill I am about this anxiety-ridden ray of sunshine/football coach (both footballs). But as we all know, being chill does not mean feeling chill. That make sense?

Anyway. This Way Up. It's about to become a mess of spoilers and feelings in here, so venture behind the cut if you dare!

For Obvious Queer Reasons I was extremely curious to find out what happens between Shona and Charlotte and Shona and Vish. As such, while it was uncomfortable to watch, I think my favorite scene in the whole season is when Shona and Vish have video chat sex and Shona has this intrusive memory of sleeping with Charlotte that feels like the ONLY moment in the entire season that she isn't performing or editing herself in some way.

My other favorite moment is when Charlotte talks about how upsetting it is to feel like a "lesson learned" chapter in Shona's autobiography.

I cannot believe I'm about to type these words, but I think the writing on this show might actually put too much trust in viewers to pick up on things. I know, this never happens! This is my dream! Why am I typing this? But hear me out. I think there are a lot of interesting parallels in terms of whether Shona and Vish (established, engaged, committed) and Áine and Richard (new, taboo [but is it really that crazy that she ends up dating the dad of someone she tutors?], exploratory) are truly able to listen to each other and accept each other's needs. It's about honesty or lack thereof, and it's also about what's really happening inside someone's mind. It's such an incredible moment when Richard tells Áine he likes that she's always so "up" and she has this private moment where you can see this heartbreak in her eyes because of course we know that she really struggles with her mental health and with depression. And I like that the show has both Bradley and Charlotte in the position of being on the overlapping outside of those relationships, offering their own wisdom from a place of really, really caring about Áine and Shona. But I just wanted MORE of that. This episodes are so short, and I needed there to be more of a tight story about those parallels, more of a sense that we'd hurtle towards some kind of revelation by episode 6.

I realize this is a thing about UK shows, but these seasons are just too short. The episodes are like 24 minutes long and there are only six of them and I felt that while you could create an effective season of TV with those constraints, this season jumped between scenes too frequently. I wanted to live in the scenes for longer. I didn't want to feel like I was watching the editing and decisions about what to show happen before my eyes.

If season 3 happens, my second biggest dream is that Bradley and Áine can have a conversation following up from the observation that it would be nice to be with someone they're just comfortable with (spoken while they're slumped on the couch together having one of the warmest conversations two characters share all season). My biggest dream is that Shona and Charlotte can have a respectful conversation about how Shona defines her sexuality. I want Shona to be safe explaining if she'd want to use the term bisexual or queer or pan or even lesbian or some combination of those terms. Not because the labels are the most useful thing, but because in this case it would be incredibly useful for her to force herself to choose some words, not in the context of feeling Vish-related pressure. To be brave enough to describe herself, and to be safe enough to know that Charlotte isn't going to make some snide comment about men. It's totally fair that Charlotte is so hurt, but she needs to be able to listen, too.

I do think this season does an incredible job capturing Shona's intense ambivalence about herself, and how she is SCRAMBLING to deflect from that by focusing on her sister, work, family, wedding-planning, the hen do, basically anything but dealing with her own little brain and heart. I mean, when COVID starts to arrive in their lives, it feels like she really wants Vish's asthmatic uncle to be the golden ticket they need to call off the wedding.

I have mixed feelings about how frequently Áine references the feeling of being an actor or the feeling of experiencing things as someone might in a movie or show or the feeling that someone else is treating her as an actor or character rather than as a real person. I think it's an interesting thing to write about, but upon first watch I struggled to figure out if it was a commentary on the other parts of the story or an additional thread Aisling Bea wanted to weave into an already incredibly short season of TV.

It was very jarring to have a COVID plot. The only mainstream media I've seen so far with a COVID plot is--LOL (to quote Áine, who says LOL so many times this season)--the final scene of the Saved By the Bell remake. Again I say LOL!!! I didn't hate it or love it, necessarily, I just thought it felt strange because we're still in the pandemic and everything is strange.

Everything with Tom was so, so, so painful. I don't know if I can even get into it. I just felt visceral devastation and was hurtled into strong memories about people in my own life who died prematurely. (Suicide but not only suicide.) The way the last scene ended felt like--immediate tears just pulled from my eyes without me even realizing what was happening. And God, the way Tom-in-the-flashback calls her a "soppy cunt" (I think?) and we realize Áine used those exact words to jokingly refer to Richard's previous girlfriend who was a human rights lawyer? GOD.

While Áine and Shona don't really engage with each other in the same way my sister and I do, my sister and I are also really, really close and I'm the older sister and watching this show always gives me a lot of emotions about siblings. This is actually part of why the rapid scene cuts and feeling that they both were leaving so much unarticulated stressed me out. Áine nails it at the end when Shona has finally told her about Charlotte and she says Shona needs to tell her more, but I wanted to SEE that conversation happen. I wanted to FEEL Áine's reaction, because Áine's reaction matters more than Vish's or their mother's or anyone else's. It was frustrating!

I dunno, y'all. I really love this show. I think it is exactly what it wants to be. I could not tell you today if I will ever rewatch it even though I (think I) still consider it a favorite. I honor and respect the fundamental messiness and pain and hilarity of this show. What a wild experience.

[liyazaki]

for the gif/graphic maker thing: 5, 12, 13 & 38 😌💕

loveliest Vish- thank you! 🌸

if y'all would like to have your eyes blessed (and why wouldn't you), go check out three of my Vish biases: this gorgeous BB seasons set, this pink-aqua BB fantasy & this orange-blue BB stunner that deserves a million notes- so everyone go help fix that problem, please.

5. what do you dislike most about making graphics / gifs?

copy-pasting from a prev. ask: the sheer timesuck of it all. I'm legitimately grateful PS doesn't have a "total hours logged" feature because I do. NOT. want to know. ever.

I'm also not a fan of people ripping/reposting my stuff on the cursed bird app (or worse, reposting it here), but now that I watermark mostly everything, it kinda just makes me giggle. it's just a bad look.

12. font(s) you like using

copy-pasting from a prev. ask- for subtitle GIF text, I use Poetson One:

for artsy edits, my two favorite fonts right now are Kiona for the primary text and Amalfi Coast for the words I want to stand out. Kiona is clean, modern and compact, and Amalfi is still very readable for being a big, sweeping font.

both in action:

13. font(s) you see being used, which you dislike

copy-pasting from a prev. ask: beyond Papyrus- which thankfully hardly anyone uses but I'd still like it to go die in a fire- I'm more concerned with the text on my edits being easily readable on both desktop and mobile, rather than disliking any particular font…teensy tiny text bothers the hell out me. there’s nothing wrong with small, minimal text, but if someone really has to work to read an edit, they probably just won't.

I'm also not really into anything overly decorative- think big Gothic fonts with tons of little details. they have their uses, but I find them more distracting than anything on most edits.

38. are you working on anything right now? If yes, show us a work in progress!

I'm actually not, which is sort of weird for me. then again, I'm the type to get struck by inspiration then stay up half the night making the thing. exorcising the idea like the creativity demon it is, essentially 🤣

out of the probably hundreds of sets I've made at this point, I've only worked on a handful for more than a day (the ITSAY/IPYTM tarot sets I'm always whining about in these kind of asks took more than a week, spending hours on them every day- EACH).

ask me gif questions

[daantaat]

twu s2 thoughts even though nobody asked <3 just a brain dump and it’s quite long so I tried to separate my commentary by categories but it’s still a mess unfortunately. Spoilers under the cut!

General

Overall, I enjoyed season 1 more than season 2. I’ve watched season 2 three times now, and I do think it had some good parts that I definitely overlooked during my first watch (probably because I was preoccupied with Charlotte x Shona 😶😅). My initial reaction to this season was like ‘hmm so that happened and I’m not sure what to think’ but then I rewatched it and tbh I think my complaints are mostly to do with the time jump between seasons and the pacing...

Like yeah there’s only so much to touch on in six 25-minute episodes but!!! I finished the season wanting a bit more, because I thought that some of the things that were introduced were either not explained fully/well or they just dropped off completely and didn’t really have an effect other than me asking questions after the season was over, like it felt as though there were missing scenes— more on that later (though maybe they will be addressed in season 3??? If there is one? How soon do shows get renewed? Idk). Though I guess the audience does have to do some interpretation of their own but still... Idk! Idk. And the assumption that certain events/plot points mentioned in a character’s dialogue would be enough for context had me kinda “:///” y’know? Like don’t tell me, show me?? I’d like the full course please!!

Charlotte x Shona (+ Vish I guess)

I think it was really jarring to see their relationship grow from colleague/business partners to friends and then finally to something more in season 1 only to see them awkwardly handle their unresolved feelings in the workplace with nothing to show for their actual relationship besides a mention of “a week-long gay safari” + the brief flashes of a sex scene that was intermingled with Shona and Vish’s cyber sex session, which in itself is 😐😐😐 like yes it shows that Shona still thinks about/fancies Charlotte in some capacity, but if I were to choose between that sex fantasy/flashback or a flashback of Charlotte and Shona together (like Charlotte telling Shona she was falling for her!!!!)... I think I’d choose the latter? I was just disappointed that we didn’t really get to see Charlotte and Shona being all cute and romantic with each other this season :(

ALSO I wished we got to see more of jealous!Shona; I was super hyped to see that since that scene was included in the trailer. It was nice to see her want the best for Charlotte because she’s “great” but the jealousy part of knowing Charlotte is dating someone great got settled pretty quickly and instead we got Shona evaluating her commitment to Vish and considering the idea of having kids after learning she has a womb of a 39-year-old (😐) and it felt.... like a lot!! It was definitely different from season 1 Shona (”I actually don’t want kids” “I genuinely, I genuinely don’t, you know, it’s not a big deal. Just never have” in 1x04) but if this was to show her dealing with comphet or internalized homophobia or just simply running away from her feelings then... idk what to think of it! I really don’t. I think this is where things could have been written differently because using an affair with Charlotte like that (an affair that we didn’t even get to see besides the stolen kisses at the finance event) was so... ugh, I’m suffering here

Anyway, I think their office scenes were definitely highlights of the season, like Indira and Sharon really gave those scenes their all!! Even though it hurts to see Charlotte so heartbroken and Shona running away from her feelings and hurting Charlotte in the process, I live for the angst lol. I will say though, the 180 that happened after their convo outside Charlotte’s office was a bit “🤔” considering Charlotte had talked to her therapist about Shona for 4 months. Like one hungover feeling dump from Shona and they can move on? Hmm communication is connection, huh. And I guess they were just excited that the article got good results? But how cute that they got each other gifts of their picture in the article??? Wtffff I love my “unfunny and obvious” gal pals even though I’m in pain

As for the voice note... omg, so many questions. Like did Charlotte try to reach out to Shona after she abruptly ended their call to check if she sent the voice note to Vish?? Was that gonna be the first time Charlotte heard Shona say “I love you” to her? What was the reason Shona said “I love you” anyway??? Is she, you know 👀 Also do y’all think Vish will listen to the entire voice note since it was clear it was meant for Charlotte? And who knows maybe Vish’s phone died and he can’t turn it back on or check his WhatsApp or whatever. I’m in denial lmao. But also I think he's a pretty good guy, like when he sent biscuits over to the house when Shona wanted some and him saying what’s the point of having fun in New York when she's not there with him... :/ but he was also a bit weird about her putting a nail in a wall or leaving out the egg duck or whatever as a display item in their house though I suppose that’s not a huge problem so like idk man idk!!! I'm just saying season 3 better not have a time jump I need to see what happens and not just in exposition

Shona and Aine

Love them :) I wish they had more scenes together (if that's possible??) but I liked the somewhat change in dynamic seeing Aine a bit worried about Shona (asking her if she’s okay when she mentions she’s thinking of getting a fringe lmao and again asking if she’s okay when they’re unpacking in Vish’s house). And of course Shona is still very protective and worrisome but seeing Aine just miserably lounging around her apartment over the weekend and getting in her bike accident after Shona wasn’t too supportive of her and James’s business idea made me so sad :( like Shona was so shitty about her not typing up everything in the notes for the meeting! And not even reading James's CV... big yikes. Anyway I thought it was odd that we didn’t get a follow up on the voice note Aine left Shona after getting into the bike accident... like she sounded soooo shaky and out of it :((( what luck Shona was sick and didn’t see Aine with a missing tooth before she got it fixed

Anyhow, Aine was right when she said Shona needs to talk to her and talk about her feelings more!! AND this is part of where my complaint about the pacing and the missing scenes comes into play! I think we should have seen Aine and Shona fighting about Shona’s affair and leaving Vish the voice note. The audience knows Aine cares about Vish and I’m not entirely sure where her relationship with Charlotte stands since Charlotte told Freddie about her being in rehab (on the assumption that he knew, as Aine’s ex-boyfriend) but!!! Just cutting to them on the floor waiting for Vish’s flight to land was not as hard hitting as it could have been

Aine x Bradley (+ Richard)

OKAYYY. Cute!!! I definitely overlooked the signs during my first watch here but yeah they were definitely there during my rewatch(es)!! I quite liked seeing Bradley try to get Aine to stop talking negatively about herself and just try to treat herself better in general like exercising and actually eating off of a plate :’) and the comparisons between Bradley and Richard have me like 👀📝 Bradley saying he likes how much Aine talks vs. Richard’s friend Mark saying she talks a lot and how he wasn’t expecting a whole show to which Richard replies he thought that at first too but she “calms down” like brooo... alright. Anyway Bradley going with her to Tom’s funeral/service made sense since he actually met Tom (though Aine did vaguely talk about him and his drinking problem to Richard in 1x05) and the fact that she told Bradley about PACT and her time there but she didn’t tell Richard (to be fair she was thinking about telling him) hmm 👀 Also Bradley saying “Sometimes it would just be nice to be with someone you could just relax with as yourself” yeah I’m on board with them

Loneliness, COVID, Communication is Connection

Initially I thought these themes could have come across a little stronger but after rewatching... hmm. Yes, Shona was lonely in the house by herself; she even asked Anil to stay for dinner, had her own “pile of shit” boyfriend on her bed (which she did clear off), and told Vish that nobody had time for her. Also after the business meeting she asked Aine what she was doing during the weekend (which Aine also spent alone anyway), but I dunno... oh yeah her hen/bachelorette party was a bit lonely since places were starting to go into lockdown and not everybody could attend, but I think the COVID element entered a bit too late into this season? I’m not sure it really added much in terms of the loneliness. Maybe it did add to the uncertainty of things though

“Communication is Connection” was there but I thought it kind of fell flat as well, but maybe that was the intention— to highlight the mess that a lack of communication can cause? Shona apparently writing off Charlotte’s feelings and them not necessarily talking about their relationship/feelings until their convo outside Charlotte’s office... Shona talking to Seema saying she’s never really asked what Vish wanted (regarding kids) and Seema saying that’s a convo for her and Vish to have... Aine not telling Richard she overheard him and Mark talking about her... Richard not consulting Aine about telling Etienne about them and just getting a new tutor for him... hmm. What does it mean. What does it all mean

Other stuff I’m still thinking about/have questions about

Shona mentioning it’s “annoying” how Aine talks like she’s the only person to ever get sad in episode 1 but still telling Aine she’s fine and then in episode 6 Shona saying she only has two emotions or whatever so she doesn’t need to talk to Aine about her feelings as much -____- istg we need to get Shona to talk to a therapist in season 3!!!

I also liked that Shona, Aine, and Eileen talked more. I’m still a little disappointed that the fact Eileen leaving Shona for three months when she was a baby was not mentioned at all. Yeah it was a secret but when Eileen said “well, you should never lie. You’ll always get caught out.” I— HELLO? If anything, that secret seeing daylight could have had something to do with Shona's sadness + loneliness this season. Also could you imagine that becoming a fear of Shona’s, like what if she doesn’t want kids because she’s afraid of doing the same thing to hers if she has any??

Jim asking Charlotte if she’s straight and Shona immediately going “what does that have to do with anything” or something like that and apologizing to Charlotte after Jim left— I’m not sure how I should have read that??? Did Shona mention to Jim that Charlotte is a lesbian?? When he started to ask, he was still looking at Shona (yeah I’m reading too much into this I know)

Marcia figuring out that Aine and Richard were seeing each other (after he touched her hand on his way out to get a taxi)— what was the purpose? Other than Marcia obviously feeling bad for Etienne, whom I assume she sees as a son of her own (based on the Mom Instinct™ snooping when she was doing housekeeping + her convo with Aine when he came back from France). She didn’t talk to either Aine or Richard about it, just told Aine to have a good time when they were leaving the house to go to their “separate” events. I guess it wasn't her place to say anything, but hm. Speaking of Etienne, it was obvious he had a schoolboy crush on Aine (or at least he was vying for her attention) in season 1 and it’s really too bad we didn’t get to see his reaction to suddenly getting a new tutor or dealing with Aine and Richard’s relationship other than him looking at them hugging while the new tutor was teaching him. He deserved some more screen time this season :(

Hmm so that was all very incoherent but if you made it this far thank youuu <3 here are some last silly comments:

Absolutely loved Julie!! I want to know what she knows about Charlotte and Shona 👀 girl give me the scoop on the last 4 months at the office

Super sad we didn’t get to see Charlotte’s cat (I’m always gonna be vocal about this 🗣🗣🗣) or know who her new girlfriend was but at the very least we were introduced to one of the most important side characters of all: Charlotte’s stompy boots <33333 she really wore those around the office with a blazer/blouse/leather skirt! We love that lesbian attire

[xcziel]

get to know me

tagged by @vishcount (thank you!!) and i'll follow her format bc making two posts seems a little much - i'm not that interesting!!

(hilariously, this post shows up as blocked for me bc of the tag 'joker' which? tumblr?????)

Part I

name: i'm an internet old, so i never use my real name online, mainly because it's spelled in a very unique way (thanks mom & dad) - i mean like, if you googled it you could find my home address in a few seconds kind of unique - but also, though i do enjoy the spelling, i actually don't like it very much when it's said out loud? (is it weird that my name written down is 'me', but my name aloud has never felt like 'me'?) always wanted a nickname but never acquired one :/

at any rate, i've had the username xcziel forever and i go by that 😊 (pronounced ex-SEE-zee-el, similar to etc. or ex-SET-er-ah! thanks @xia-xueyi for pointing out that it can be confusing to guess!)

rest behind a cut because it got long!

pronouns: she/her

star sign: i don't ... really *do* astrology? but technically saggitarius

height: 5'4" (162.5cm for the intl folks)

time: 5:43pm but these thing take me forever to type out so ... ???

birthday: playing the 'internet old' card again .. but it floats around american Thanksgiving depending on the year

nationality: american

fave bands/groups/solo artists: lumping these together because i just .. don't really do music much anymore. if you had asked me this back in my 20s i'm sure i would have had all kinds of opinions and things to share, but these days i actually mostly prefer to listen music from when i was a kid. part of it is also that as an old, i prefer to buy my music, even digitally, and i don't really use spotify - which does so much to enable diverse music exploration i admit! but i mostly have earplugs in all the time and music does not work for me as background noise, so...

so i guess my answer would be 70s disco and classic rock and 80s new wave artists? i've never liked any artist's entire discography and prefer greatest hits-type compilations, but i guess duran duran and def leppard and depeche mode would be considered formative? i love new order but specifically late 80s new order, NOT joy division. the only concert t-shirt i've ever worn was the cult? i loved sonic temple but i can't listen to most of it anymore though i still adore love removal machine. i think maybe if you get old enough, for some of us there's TOO MUCH good music and we can't pare it down anymore

song stuck in your head: jamiroquai's canned heat

last movie you watched: re: the above, i re-watched center stage, the 2000 one with zoe saldana and the mandy moore soundtrack, bc it's a happy comfort movie and i just got a digital version

last show you binged: i can't really "binge" very often bc after a couple of hours i need a break, so i guess i'd say the tgcf donghua on netflix since it was short enough to get through all in one go

when you created your blog: in 2012 i stopped lurking so i could post about the avengers movie

the last thing you googled: 5'4" in cm? lol before that it was chinese wrapped street food

other blogs: everything is here! i discovered i compartmentalize about as well as i tag reliably (😓) but i do have several automated ao3feed-tag style sideblogs. and i did, very briefly, have a *winces* hockey sideblog too

why i chose my url: ooh i know i've done this before, sorry if it's repetitive, basically it was the username i picked back when my family first got aol: short, unique combo of letters - 14-year-old me really thought about it! and then it wouldn't let me use anything other than my name. thirty-some-odd years later, trying to come up with a livejournal username that wasn't already taken and getting fed up, i plugged it in and went: good enough!

how many people are you following: like 760-something last i checked? although many, many, many of them are deactivated

how many followers do you have: idk i don't like looking at that stuff, but way fewer than i am following

average hours of sleep: it varies too much day by day, my sleep schedule is too wonky, i have no idea what the average would be

lucky numbers: 7? cliché i know, and again not really buying into it, but somewhere in my hindbrain i like it that my first, middle, and last names all have seven letters

instruments: none. i like singing

what i'm currently wearing: giant black t-shirt and baggy black drawstring shorts, standard sitting around the house gear

dream job: don't have one. if i did it would give me something to be working towards *sigh* this is how you end up in retail for decades, kids! but also, to quote a random post i saw in true tumblr fashion "i simply do not dream of labor"

dream trip: covered this one before but: back to the uk and some railway daytrips, or a really fancy northern cruise, atlantic/pacific either one

fave food: uhhh, don't really have a favorite but i'm almost always in the mood for pizza

top three fictional universe you'd like to live in: none really, if i had to still be me..maybe some kind of actually utopian future? but the pandemic has confirmed for me that i do NOT like living in interesting times, so most fictional story universes are RIGHT out. my favorites to read about like discworld or diana wynne jones' worlds would be way to chaotic for my comfort. possibly diane duane's young wizards universe would be safe enough to be okay?

Part II

last song: watching center stage made me think of my dance playlist so sunrise by simply red

last movielast stream: i don't watch streams or youtube often, so it was the same as you, vish! liu chang's birthday stream was SO enjoyable i screenrecorded the entire thing just so i could play it back (and maybe gif sometime if i ever get the drive to actually do it)

currently reading: well i just finished the translated quan qiu gao kao or global university entrance exam novel, which was sparked purely from catching a single rec post here on tumblr and basically just *falling* into this 166 chapter epic that is *amazing* and not coming up for air until i got to the end, which is typical novel-reading behavior for me (yes i was the kid who read through lunch period and got hassled by people who kept pestering me with "what're you reading" questions and yes i realize probably a lot of you on tumblr were too) plus, the new murderbot novel is out tomorrow!!!!! so that'll be where i end up next!

currently watching: the entire dmbj verse (that i can get my hands on) but ... sporadically and stopping at random different parts because the thing is ... this type of show is not really the kind i enjoy so much? so since it's more for "research" and learning character arcs (and let's be honest: shots of liu sang), etc. it's easy to get distracted by other stuff. i'm also watching the sleuth of the ming dynasty, mr queen, bromance, the expanse, re-watching farscape and stargate sg-1, just finished the falcon and the winter soldier, and then anytime something new and short gets introduced it jumps the queue. there are just. so. many. things. to. watch! (now i have to look into anti-fraud league too!? you all are cruel ...)

what is antipoetry to you: i ... don't really think much about poetry? i know what i prefer is usually the more basic rhymed kind like lewis carroll, emily dickinson, poe, coleridge, etc. so i suppose i don't have much use for classifying non-rhyming verse? i can appreciate stuff like rupi kaur which i guess would qualify? or that william carlos williams plums poem? but it doesn't really stick with me the way lyric-like verse does

currently craving: i never know what exactly this is meant to be in reference to ... hmmm, i would love a new high-concept, high production-quality movie like say, pacific rim, to be released, just for that massive, excited energy that comes with something new that hasn't already got tons of disappointing or conflicting history behind it - that would be so fun!!

other than that, right now, i mostly kinda want some fried fish? but that will have to wait until i go to get my second vaccine shot on wednesday since it's on the way there. i'd also like my internal body parts to settle down and fly right but it's been more than a month and they don't seem inclined :(((( maybe once i'm fully vaxxed i'll think about consulting somebody about it

tagging @foxofninetales @xia-xueyi @momosandlemonsoda @memorydragon @thewindsofsong @elvencantation @mylastbraincql @hesayshesgotboyfriend @aurawolfgirl2000 @smaragdine-galaxy and anyone who wants to! but never feel obligated and if you don't get around to it for like half a year that's totally fine, i am still interested!!!

[puppy-phum]

Hello Vish! Congratulations on your milestone. Thank you for creating and sharing all your beautiful edits with us, I really love and enjoy seeing them on my dash. I hope I'm not too late for sending you prompts. I have several of them because I'm not really good at choosing a show/pairing + text combination, so I'm not sure if these will work but I'm just going to try. Please feel free to choose whichever combination that meets your interest, or just ignore them if you think they're not something you prefer to do.

1) The Eclipse (AkkAyan) + Quotes from George Orwell, 1984: (a) “Perhaps one did not want to be loved so much as to be understood.” or (b) “If you loved someone, you loved him, and when you had nothing else to give, you still gave him love.” or (c) “We shall meet in the place where there is no darkness.”

2) Enchanté (AkkTheo) + Quotes from Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince: (a) “And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” or (b) “It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important.”

I hope one of these combinations works for you, if not, that's okay too :) Thank you, and I hope you have a lovely day! 💜

hello april ♥ thank you for all your lovely words and the prompts ^^ i've enjoyed them and i'm so very happy to have you here! i knew ever since i received this ask that i'd go for one of the akktheo prompts you gifted me. i adored enchante and never got to make any edits for it before, so i wanted to try. both quotes were lovely, but for some reason, i got stuck on the rose.

here's what i came up with

i hope you enjoy the edit ♥ have a wonderful rest of your week!

(some extra rambles under the cut!)

so i didn't have a very definite plan for this edit, other than that i wanted this to work as some type of "bookmark" visually. as the little prince is, well, a book and they tie akktheo's journey with the said book very tightly, i wanted this bookmark to work as their timeline? does this make sense? i hope it does haha.

the rose travels with them through their relationship ever since it first appears before akktheo's first kiss. this made me think about the "time wasted for your rose" as they both kind of... idk. they both waste time on each other and figuring out this thing between them. but they willingly do it. every time, it's time willingly given away. that wasted time, it matters to them.

so i wanted the rose to just appear a lot in this edit. to be present and show these changes in their relationship. how it all starts with a little spark, in an unlikely place, and grows despite the hard circumstances (within theo as he guards it by himself for a long while). then it finally gets a home as akk starts discovering his own feelings and accepts them.

then akk moves the rose to theo's care, thinking it will be better off there. i took this as a way of akk giving his heart away. the rose symbolises that. he took care of it with all his might and now it's with theo where it belongs. he tries to take care of theo but feels that theo is better at taking care of both of them.

and then... well, the petals scene was supposed to symbolise their romance and the romantic moments between them. the celebration kind of. the cheer and joy and falling even deeper in love. the soft moments, spent surrounded by their now blooming love.

and then there's the rose that withers as theo gets hurt and akktheo separate. the rose that hurts theo (literally as he pricks his finger on it) and starts dropping its petals. the rose theo no longer knows how to take care of and the rose that eventually witnesses theo leave back to france, alone.

but bc this was supposed to be happy, i ofc had to include the akktheo reunion in france (in that very horrible cgi france XD) so the hug is there. with the lonely rose... well. let's just think that the rose now has a new life somewhere. all that time wasted on it wasn't for nothing.

i hope any of this makes sense! i loved making this edit and i personally enjoy the colors in this a lot ^^ also it was fun going through enchanté again, i miss that show and i miss the soft, sweet forcebook ♥

[cryospheric]

Yuletide Letter 2021

I am Nimbostratus on AO3!

Thank you for writing for me! I've included the dynamics I like most / some suggestions but I love all these characters a LOT so anything you write about them will make me happy.

General likes: slow burn, femslash, female friendships, women being good at their jobs, friends to lovers, getting together, character study, oblivious lesbian, five times fic, soulmates AU, apocalypse, backstory, fake relationship, accidentally married, jealousy, ladies with anger issues, dealing with past trauma, ptsd / implied ptsd, using first names to demonstrate intimacy, friends find out they're dating, secret relationship, getting caught in a secret relationship, accidentally dating.

Veep - Amy Brookheimer

DNW: degradation, non/dubcon, D/s, safewords, non-canonical character death.

I'm really interested in her relationships with Dan and Selina, romantic or otherwise, and I like when its acknowledged that Amy is good at her job. I also like the ensemble in general being a bunch of useless assholes.

I would be interested in something that digs into why she's stuck it out working for Selina for so long. Doesn't have to be romantic but could be e.g. she's secretly in love with Selina / secretly sleeping with her / slept with her years ago and never got over it.

I don't like the later season dynamic where Amy is suddenly pining over Dan and being humiliated/ pathetic. I would be interested in canon-divergence in their relationship in S6/7 - secret friendship, secret relationship, friends with benefits, fake dating, post-canon they end up working together etc.

Line of Duty - Joanne Davidson & Kate Fleming

DNW: degradation, D/s, safewords, non/dubcon - reference to past abuse fine but no graphic details please, non-canonical character death, setting change AU, pregnancy, kidfic, graphic depictions of self harm.

I’m still obsessed with the dynamic between these two. Some stuff I like:

Kate pushing Jo to tell her the truth & Jo trying to resist but finding it hard because she likes Kate so much, acknowledgment that Jo has done a lot of bad things and Kate is right to be angry with her, Kate wrestling with why she believed Jo despite all evidence to the contrary, Jo struggling with guilt/self-loathing, Steve confronting Kate about the way she acted about Jo, Kate processing her feelings post S6, post S6 reunion, "what if" moments where Jo could have told Kate what was going on, how they became so close pre-s6 with bonus Lomax & Farida team bonding, what if they had got away the night Ryan died, dark!Jo, both manipulating each other but catching feelings etc.

I put setting change AUs in my DNW but I would read an X-Files AU.

The Americans - Elizabeth Jennings

DNW: degradation, non/dubcon - reference to past abuse fine but no graphic details please, D/s, safewords, non-canonical character death, setting change AUs, PWP.

I would be happy with any sort of Elizabeth focused story! Character study, pre-canon - why she joined the KGB or her early relationship with Philip, post-canon settling into Russia with Philip or even seeing Paige again way in the future, case-fic type set during/pre-series when she works with Philip.

Relationships between Elizabeth and Philip, Paige, other women, her dedication to ~ the cause above all else. Interested in exploring her sense of guilt about the things that she's done but ultimately feels were worth it in pursuit of the cause (or does she start feeling disillusioned once they get back to Russia???).

This Way Up - Charlotte & Shona

DNW: degradation, non/dubcon, D/s, safewords, character death, historical AUs.

I was disappointed in the lack of Charlotte / Shona in S2! I would like to see more of them post-kiss, during the affair, what happens post voice mail, "what if" they met / got together earlier.

A focus on Shona understanding her lack of commitment to Vish / previous BFs as a sign that she's a lesbian, moments in her life when she should've realised she was gay etc. where Charlotte is involved but not the main focus would also be great.

The Expanse - Camina Drummer

DNW: degradation, non/dubcon, D/s, safewords, non-canonical character death, setting change AUs, pregnancy, kidfic.

Any sort of character study including pre-canon backstory, something that involves a load of Belter culture / political world building (in awe of the world building on this show!!!), Drummer being extremely competent & badass, focus on her relationships with Oksana and / or Naomi, seeing Naomi again for the first time, rebuilding her relationship with Oksana, how she met Oksana in the first place etc. Only really interested in other members of the polycule as they relate to Drummer.

[ruanbaijie]

oh boy this looks really lengthy

but thanks nevertheless aamna and vish for tagging~! (⺣◡⺣)♡* @yibobibo @vishcount 

1. What is the colour of your hairbrush? mine’s a comb, and it’s dark blue

2. Name a food you never eat. CHILLIS. CHILLI PEPPERS. EGGPLANTS. LADY’S FINGERS. BRUSSELS SPROUTS. and so on.

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? too warm TnT I live in a place that’s one degree above the equator the temperature 365 days a year ranges from 25-35˚C and the only seasons we have are hotdamnfuckinghotsun and raaaaaaiiiiinnn (this one now)

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? scrolling through taobao while lying on my bed _(:3」∠)_

5. What’s your favourite candy bar? no favourite, I rarely eat candy bars

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? uhhhhhh... the only one I can remember is the equestrian event during the youth olympic games in 2010

7. What is the last thing you said out loud? I can’t remember HAHA probably something during dinner last night

8. What is your favourite ice cream? cookies & cream, strawberry cheesecake

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? green tea

10. Do you like your wallet? yes! I got it in shanghai in 2011 and have been using it ever since. it features an patterned cat illustration by this taiwanese illustrator called 幾米 (jimmy liao) I LOVE IT

11. What is the last thing you ate? papayas after dinner last night

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? nope

13. What’s the last sporting event you watched? UHHHHHHH

14. What is your favourite flavour of popcorn? sweet/ caramel

15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to? @stebeee screaming over the art she commissioned

16. Ever been camping? yes when I was 15 and I absolutely hated it

17. Do you take vitamins? sometimes

18. Do you regularly attend a place of worship? tumblr

19. Do you have a tan? nope

20. Do you prefer chinese or pizza? okay I really don’t know how to answer this one. there are so many different types of “chinese” food and I love some and hate others, and I’m guessing the same applies for pizza too. how do I choose?? which chinese food and which pizza is this referring to??

21. Do you drink your soda through a straw? yep I am guilty of killing the planet

22. What colour socks do you usually wear? black/ grey/ ones with random cartoons that I got from korea in 2015 and that are getting loose 

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? probably once or twice, but not intentionally

24. What terrifies you? change, uncertainty, and growing old

25. Look to your left, what do you see? charging cables

26. What chore do you hate most? sweeping + mopping

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? chris hemsworth

28. What’s your favourite soda? sprite

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? we don’t have a lot of drive thrus here so we go in lol

30. What’s your favourite number? 4, 9, 13

31. Who’s the last person you talked to? physically, probably my dad. virtually, @stebeee

32. Favourite meat? beef, mutton

33. Last song you listened to? fire and water (the opening of tsomd)

34. Last book you read? currently reading mo du (priest)!!! it’s so good!!!! READ MO DU

35. Favourite day of the week? days when I’m on leave

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? nope lolol

37. How do you like your coffee? just like i like my men so,,, no. -STEALING THIS FROM YOU VISH BECAUSE THIS IS PERFECT for real though I avoid coffee like the plague, I hate the palpitations they gave me

38. Favourite pair of shoes? my doc martens <3

39. Time you normally get up? around 8am

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets

41. How many blankets on your bed? 1 thick one (I sleep with air conditioning)

42. Describe your kitchen plates. white with floral patterns 

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment. cluttered probably

44. Do you have a favourite alcoholic drink? I’m a beer person hoho

45. Do you play cards? nope

46. What colour is your car? I don’t have my own one (owning cars is fucking expensive in singapore), but my parents’ which I sometimes drive is silver

47. Can you change a tyre? hell no

48. Your favourite state or province? singapore has no states AHA we’re too tiny

49. Favourite job you’ve had? I’m in my first job and I like it so far ^^

this took a while but it was fun! 

tagging if you wanna~ @paulyubin @candicewright @sarawatsaraleo @merelhyn @fenxing 

and since I’ve already tagged you like two times @stebeee

[pokemon-inspiration]

Galarian Fossil Theory

Dr. Miranda Carter

Paleobiologist and Regenerator Operator at the Institute for PaleoPokemon Research in Rustboro City, Hoenn

To say those fossil Pokemon unique to the region of Galar have been tough to get our hands on would be a rather large understatement. Rumors have been circulating around the office for years about these creatures after it was announced that while new fossils had been discovered and regeneration was successful, the Royal Galarian Paleontological Society was withholding both living and fossilized specimens under tight watch for further research. I’m not proud, but we were able to pull some strings behind the scenes to get a handful of fossilized and living specimens. So far as I can tell it involved bribing one of the less scrupled scientists with a truly unholy amount of Lava Cookies.

To say we were confused is yet another rather large understatement. These Pokemon are like nothing we’d ever seen. Gorgeous, to be sure, as well as perfectly healthy and stable in their regenerated forms, but utterly and wholly unique. As I’m led to understand, the idea is that there are several “halves” of fossils that are alternately draconic and piscene that are able to be combined in any order to create the four total fossil Pokemon of Galar: Dracozolt, Arctozolt, Dracovish, and Arctovish. While Dracozolt and Arctovish look at a passing glance like relatives of Tyrantrum and Relicanth respectively, Arctozolt and Dracovish seem rather mishmashed. Arctozolt even seems to have its head perched upon what would otherwise be Dracozolt’s tail! Even in their “normal” configurations, the anatomy struck both me and the other paleobiologists as somewhat mishmashed, most notably seen in Dracozolt’s dramatic abdominal expansion at the lower end of its rib-cage.

All this, of course, set our minds ablaze with various theories as to how in all the world such biological configurations could be possible. Regenerators involve some guesswork on our part to fill in degraded DNA patterns, as an operator myself I will easily grant you that, but the grafting of two entirely different species together in a manner resembling this with any other species would be impossible. Even subtle differences in anatomy would at best blow out the machine due to contradicting patterns, and at worse, if such a malformed creature were to come forth... I don’t even want to think of how it would suffer. 

The first theory, and still quite a popular one, put forward by some of my colleagues is that the two more put together species, Dracozolt and Arctovish, are actually far more closely related than they appear. The idea is that perhaps, though they superficially seem like completely different species, they are in fact extremely similar when it comes to underlying anatomy. Some in this camp believe that Arctovish might have given rise to Dracozolt as Water types were making their way onto land, others think that perhaps Arctovish is the result of Dracozolt taking to water in the same way Wailmer and Wailord’s ancestors did. In either case, with this theory, it is suspected that the underlying anatomy of the two is so similar, that in the replication process the Replicator cannot adequately distinguish the two from each other on a genetic level, so resulting in Dracovish and Arctozolt. While initially compelling, I personally believe the radically different body layouts of Arctozolt and Dracovish cannot be compatible with this theory.

The second theory is the one I came up with, and so far I believe it is relatively sound. The “halves” of fossils, as they have been referred to by the Galarians, are not halves of a whole organism. Each half is, in and of itself, a distinct species of Pokemon that developed symbiotic relationships with the other three in order to gain greater flexibility and power. This symbiotic relationship between the ancient Pokemon “Arcto” “Zolt” “Draco” and “Vish” evolved to such a point that once joined, the union between the two would be nearly flawless. This is not entirely unprecedented, as we have seen similar relationships between Pokemon, like Slowbro and Slowking, even as far as the components mutually changing once joined. This I think further helps explain the odd configurations of these Pokemon: While Arctozolt appears to have its head atop a tail, the “tail” is actually a complex part of the body capable of serving as a torso in order to give the “Arcto” half a higher viewpoint and more intimidating stance while affording the “Zolt” half the protection of a great toothy maw. Even the shuffling of elemental types seems to fit in this, as a shifting amount of elemental resistances and advantages would seem to give these four species a much better chance against predators and prey with static elemental proficiencies.

Thus, due to their intense symbiosis millions of years ago, the Regenerator simply follows the patterns of union these Pokemon displayed in life, and simply merges the two on a more permanent basis. This doesn’t seem to be a very large biological leap, given how healthy these living specimens are. Even before being regenerated, these Pokemon must have had some extremely advanced methods of combining into one superorganism!

Of course, I could be completely and entirely wrong on this. That’s the wonderful thing about science though: if I’m wrong, I get to learn more about the world around me! More delightful research awaits!

[frostkingoftheapocalypse]

AUs I’m still cravin’:

Cops/Detectives AU

Cowboy AU  is TAKEN thanks vish aaaa

Dark Hunter AU   im trash shh

Sci fi/Robot/ Titanfall/ cyberpunk themed AUs as many as possible   (plz i just read the murderbot diaries and also so very pumped about cyberpunk2077 AND i FINALLy played the mass effect trilogy like i am hYPE)

Secret Agent/spies AU

We’re government experiments in neighbouring cells and we should plot an escape AU   im really trash shhh

Ur family has been keeping a ‘monster’ they trapped generations ago in the basement, and u discover its ur legacy and the key in a crytpic brutal death message/Hellsing-esque style AU

Muse A is an artist in a renaissance italy type setting, but ur patron has assigned u a protector for some weird unexeplained reason while ur on the job, hey i guess they’re paying so AU is TAKEN by our fav cube angel

Modern day His Dark Materials/Daemon AU

The Art of War, two Generals from different continents, their countries have decided their only option is to try invade the other, but we’ve been sending secret diplomatic correspondence and I hate to say I like you but AU

I’m your new monstrous guardian spirit, but my previous charges have all been too terrified of me face-to-face to teach me their language, and they always come to deny my existence once adulthood hits??? Stuck behind an ancient language barrier, a cryptid that appears to young souls in a time of need and abandonment, so guess what, ur not alone in the world after all AU

Dragonriders AU