#Virtual Router

[aishavass]

The North American region is anticipated to hold the largest market size in the global virtual router market...

[astrofinnie]

BRIGHT/EYESTRAINING COLORS UNDER THE CUT

This is P.U.P.! She’s a malware virtual assistant! She can read e-mails, search the web, and definitely not make you prone to viruses!

She’s inspired by old Macintosh computers, bonzi buddy, and viruses!

Also yes yes, i’m coming out of hiatus, i won’t be posting much on the weekend cus my pookie’s coming over!

Should i make an ask account for her?

[satireinfo]

Breaking: Santa Now Accepting Digital Cookies

[adobodemon]

*spending the better part of my morning figuring out how to run a VPN on my router so my stupid fucking smart TV unlocks the American Exclusive Features for me so I can Airplay my laptop onto it to watch last night's Drag Race ep* I honestly don't know how I ended up as a software engineer

[pupsmailbox]

TECHNOLOGY ID PACK

NAMES ⌇　admin. ajax. alexa. am. atari. audio. auto. bailey. binary. blank. blu. blue. bluesse. browser. browsette. bug. byte. cache. calware. chip. circe. click. clicker. clickie. clicky. cloud. coda. code. codette. codie. cody. computette. crypt. cursor. cy. cyber. cybernet. cybernetica. cyberweb. cypher. cypherre. data. dell. digi. digitalia. digitelle. digitesse. disc. dot. electronica. electronique. emoticon. emoticonnie. fax. file. gig. gizmo. glitch. glitche. glitchesse. glitchette. graphique. hacker. hal. halware. hijack. index. informationne. intelligette. internette. interweb. java. javascript. juno. key. link. linuxe. lotus. lovebytes. mac. mal. malakai. malware. malwaria. memorette. memorie. meta. mic. micah. mickey. morphe. mouse. mousette. myspace. nano. neo. net. netette. nett. netty. paige. pascal. payton. peyton. pixel. programatha. programette. programme. pulse. reboot. rom. router. ruby. sam. sammy. screene. screenette. sean. shock. solitaire. spy. static. stutter. talia. tap. tecca. tech. techette. tessa. tetris. trojan. troubleshoot. ts. user. vir. virus. virusse. volt. vyrus. webbe. wheatley. whirr. widget. will. wirehead. wiresse. zap. zett. zetta. zip.

PRONOUNS ⌇　:-)/:-D. ^^/^^. ai/ai. alt/alt. anti/antivirus. arc/archive. audio/audio. bat/battery. beep/beep. beep/boop. bit/bit. bit/byte. blue/blue. board/board. bright/bright. brow/browser. browser/browser. brr/brr. bu/bug. bug/bug. buzz/buzz. byt/byte. byte/byte. c/cpu. charge/charger. cir/circuit. cli/click. click/clack. click/click. click/scroll. co/code. code/code. color/color. com/com. com/computer. comp/computer. compute/computer. computer/computer. cor/corrupt. corrupt/corrupt. CPU/CPU. crash/crash. cre/creeper. crtl/crtl. cy/cyber. cyb/cyber. cyber/cyber. da/data. data/data. delete/delete. di/disk. dig/digital. digi/digi. digi/digital. digital/digital. dra/drag. e/exe. electronic/electronic. enter/enter. er/error. err/error. error/error. exe/exe. fi/file. file/file. gi/gif. gli/glitch. glit/glitch. glitch/glitch. graphic/graphic. hac/hacker. hack/hack. hard/hardware. head/phone. hij/hijacker. ho/home. info/info. information/information. int/internet. intelligent/intelligence. intelligent/intelligent. inter/net. internet/internet. it/it. jpg/jpg. key/board. key/cap. key/key. key/keyboard. key/keylogger. lag/lag. lap/laptop. ligh/light. linux/linux. load/load. log/login. main/mainframe. mal/malware. me/media. memory/memorie. mon/monitor. mou/mouse. nano/nano. net/net. net/network. o_o/>_>. org/org. over/overwrite. page/page. pix/pix. pix/pixel. pixel/pixel. plu/plug. png/png. pop/popup. port/port. pow/power. pro/program. program/program. ram/ram. ran/ransom. reboot/reboot. reload/reload. res/restore. ret/retro. route/router. sca/scan. scr/scroll. scre/screen. scre/screencap. scree/screen. screen/screen. scri/script. script/script. sentient/sentience. shift/shift. site/site. skip/skip. soft/software. spa/spam. space/space. spy/spyware. stop/stop. te/tech. tech/nology. tech/tech. technology/technology. tou/touchpad. txt/txt. typ/type. upload/upload. user/user. vi/viru. vi/virus. vir/virtual. web/page. web/web. whir/whir. wi/wire. win/dow. win/window. wire/wire. wire/wired. zip/zip . ⌨ . ☣ . ⚙ . ⚠ . 🎞 . 🎨 . 🎭 . 🎮 . 🎵 . 👀 . 👁 . 💔 . 💡 . 💢 . 💣 . 💳 . 💵 . 💻 . 💽 . 💾 . 💿 . 📀 . 📱 . 🔇 . 🔈 . 🔉 . 🔊 . 🔋 . 🔌 . 🔎 . 🖥 . 🖱 . 🗡 . 🗯 . 🛠 . 🧿 .

[doefrilled]

𓎟 ̊    names and prns relating to the internet, cyberspace, and technology𓈒

requested by anon

Zett﹐  Zetta﹐  Disc﹐  Data﹐  Virus﹐  Vir﹐  Code﹐  Codette﹐  Interweb﹐  Cyberweb﹐  Binary﹐  Morphe﹐  Index﹐  Byte﹐  File﹐  Auto﹐  Nett﹐  Crypt﹐  Trojan﹐  Mac﹐  Pixel﹐  Router﹐  Cache﹐  Java﹐  Malware﹐  Coda

ai ais﹐  glitch glitches﹐  screen screens﹐  web webs﹐  pix pixel﹐  .png .pngs﹐  .exe .exes﹐  .jpg .jpgs﹐  file files﹐  cyber cybers﹐  code codes﹐  script scripts﹐  .com .coms﹐  tech techs﹐  .net .nets﹐  .org .orgs﹐  error errors﹐  nano nanos﹐  vir virtual﹐  net network﹐  key keys﹐  .zip .zips﹐  wire wires

[PT: names and pronouns relating to the internet, cyberspace, and technology

requested by anon

Names: Zett, Zetta, Disc, Data, Virus, Vir, Code, Codette, Interweb, Cyberweb, Binary, Morphe, Index, Byte, File, Auto, Nett, Crypt, Trojan, Mac, Pixel, Router, Cache, Java, Malware, Coda

Pronouns: ai/ais, glitch/glitches, screen/screens, web/webs, pix/pixel, .png/.pngs, .exe/.exe, .jpg/.jpg, file/files, cyber/cybers, code/codes, script/scripts, .com/.coms, tech/techs, .net/.nets, .org/.orgs, error/errors, nano/nanos, vir/virtual, net/network, key/keys, .zip/.zips, wire/wires

/end PT.]

[yesterdays-xkcd]

Viruses so far have been really disappointing on the 'disable the internet' front, and time is running out. When Linux/Mac win in a decade or so the game will be over.

Network [Explained]

Transcript Under the Cut

[Megan looking at a large screen with many green and red squares. The squares have writing in them and lines connecting them.]

[Side view. The screen is a huge LCD connected to a wireless router.] Cueball: Pretty, isn't it? Megan: What is it?

Cueball: I've got a bunch of virtual Windows machines networked together, hooked up to an incoming pipe from the net. They execute email attachments, share files, and have no security patches. Cueball: Between them they have practically every virus.

Cueball: There are mail trojans, warhol worms, and all sorts of exotic polymorphics. A monitoring system adds and wipes machines at random. The display shows the viruses as they move through the network. Growing and struggling.

[Cueball walks past the girl and touches the monitor.] Megan: You know, normal people just have aquariums. Cueball: Good morning, Blaster. Are you and W32.Welchia getting along? Cueball: Who's a good virus? You are! Yes, you are!

[galaxywarp]

My cat Jubi cuddling various electronics: a master post

Nintendo switch

Virtual reality headset

Keyboard and mouse

Headphones

My cellphone

My first ever cellphone (circa 2011)

Credit card reader

Nintendo switch again (+ a copy of Hyrule warriors)

And my personal favorite: Wi-Fi router

[crowcryptid]

I'm sick and tired of YouTube VPN sponsorships so here are the facts presented in an easy to understand way.

For the purposes of this post, assume everything I say is in relation to being connected to your home router, unless stated otherwise. Businesses have a different use for VPNs.

What is a VPN? A VPN is a virtual private network. Think of it this way, imagine you are trading notes in class but they are encoded. The teacher takes a note but can't read it, but the teacher still sees you passing them. In this case, you are your PC or phone, the other person is the VPN server, the teacher is your ISP. ISP stands for internet service provider. It's whoever you are paying for your connection.

What does that mean? It means that your ISP doesn't see what you're doing. They can only see that you are connected to a VPN and how much data you're using.

Why would I use a VPN? If you are torrenting and have an annoying ISP that sends scary letters in the mail, it will stop them from sending a letter. Assuming you are doing things correctly and bind your VPN to your torrenting client and using a kill switch. Also, should you be accessing content that is censored, it can help to bypass that. Whether that works or not depends on how strict the censorship is. You can also use it to access another countries version of a product. For Example: Netflix in the US will have different content than Netflix in Australia. Keep in mind not all VPNs are equal in this regard. Some of them may not be able to stream from every country.

As a normal home user, the most a VPN is going to do for you is as follows: Accessing content from other regions, avoiding your ISP snooping in on what websites you look at, torrenting, and possibly accessing censored content. That's literally it.

In the event you are doing some illegal shit that gets law enforcement involved, this is not going to help unless you are truly covering your tracks. I will not explain beyond that because the people who need to do that are either: Irrationally paranoid, doing some terrible things, or are journalists/whistleblowers etc in hiding. So not the people reading this.

Businesses use them too, but I'm only talking about home users here. All that other stuff you hear in YouTube sponsors is either a lie or something you don't need.

What is an IP? It's like your networks address. Think of your router and IP as the same thing, this isn't accurate, but I'm simplifying here. The router is like the mail room in a building. The requested data comes to the mail room, your router/public IP, and then gets sorted into the correct mail box. Similarly, any data you send out is being placed in the outgoing box in the mail room and everything has a return address on it. So anyone receiving your data knows where it's coming from. Each individual mail box is a device connected to the router. The mail box is your local IP and isn't important for this topic, just thought I'd mention it. Your public IP reveals your general location (it is not exact and can be off by a considerable distance) and what ISP you are using. This is only what is revealed to the internet as a whole. Your ISP still has your address, name, billing info, etc, all tied to your IP.

What about my location? When using a VPN your IP will be whatever the VPN provider gives you. So this can mean your location changes and any website you access will not see your home router's IP. KEEP IN MIND. VPN server IPs are not a secret. Your ISP and any website you visit knows you are using a VPN. Some sites will block you entirely due to this. You will also get way more captchas in general. Because hiding yourself is inherently seen as suspicious or possibly malicious to companies.

Does it help with privacy? YES AND NO. Prepare for a long one here. Excuse the use of caps. If you use a VPN but are logged into your usual account, using your usual device, with the same browser you always use, basically what I'm trying to say is that Everything you're doing is the same but your IP is different, then NO. It will only serve you for the usual purposes of torrenting, hiding activity from your ISP, or streaming from other countries. Facebook, Twitter, Google, etc still know it's you. I cannot describe to you just how much you are being tracked, always. Ok not always, but most of the time. Someones personal website built from the ground up with no ads probably isn't tracking you much.

Yes, your ISP is only seeing encrypted data but they and every website you visit knows exactly who you are and they can tell you're using a VPN.

ALL TRUST HAS BEEN REMOVED FROM THE ISP AND PLACED IN THE VPN PROVIDER INSTEAD. If you are using a VPN because you do not trust your ISP or government, you still have to trust the VPN provider.

THE DATA YOU SEND TO WEBSITES IS NOT "HIDDEN" FROM THAT WEBSITE.

This. Literally doesn't make any sense. But YT sponsorships will insist that everything you do is encrypted and safe from "hackers" and "all forms of spying". THAT'S NOT HOW THIS WORKS. A VPN will only encrypt data between YOU and the VPN server. Once it LEAVES THE VPN SERVER it is NOT ENCRYPTED BY THE VPN ANYMORE. It's up to the website/database/server owners to keep your passwords and personal info safe. You do not have any control over data leaks or breaches.

The only encryption from that point on will be from HTTPS which means that any sensitive data is hidden.

Here is a visual to help you understand.

You [encrypted stuff] -> your ISP [sees encrypted stuff but doesn't know whats inside] -> VPN [server decrypts the data and sees everything you sent] -> Website you accessed

Ok. Now. This sounds scary and dangerous. But every website that uses HTTPS (the little lock icon on your browsers url bar) is ALSO encrypting things. This is why you can login to something on public wifi and not have your login info stolen immediately. A website that's only using HTTP is NOT encrypting anything and most browsers will warn you of this. No social media site or really any modern site is using HTTP. HTTPS is the standard.

So that whole ad read about "protecting you on public wifi" is not as important as it sounds. Yes, some things would be visible, but do you really care that someone can tell you loaded up Instagram at a coffee shop? That's for you to decide. If you use a VPN you could hide that, but it's not doing much else. If anything, you should be more concerned that the router is what it says it is. By that I mean that the router actually belongs to the coffee shop you're at and that isn't a decoy pretending to be the real one or that the real router is compromised. You really won't be able to check this if there's no obvious sign like there being 2 networks both claiming to be the coffee shops guest network. Even if that is the case, HTTPS is still encrypting things. They can pull some other tricks though like sending you to a fake website that looks like the real one to see if you type in your login info. Or try to distribute malware or exploit your device. But, this isn't really something you should lose sleep over. It's probably not going to happen lmao

If you are still paranoid about public wifi, just use the VPN or your phone's data plan.

Now for the other included BS that sponsorships will spew.

Does it increase security? No. Unless you are trying to avoid an IP grabber I suppose. If your connection was unencrypted in the first place, especially not. This means the website is transmitting everything in plaintext for anyone to see or modify along the way. The VPN would only encrypt the data between your device and the VPN server. Afterwards it become unsafe again. If your connection was already encrypted via HTTPS and is presumably not compromised, then no it does not help either as you were already secure. VPNs do not block malware or malicious websites. Those are added features that may be included in you VPN plan. I wouldn't place all my trust into a feature like that. You should always have multiple layers of protection, the most important one being common sense to not click things randomly. The other layers being: Up to date OS and software, an adblocker, a firewall, and antivirus software.

Does it protect me from data breaches, hackers, or whatever else? Again, no. Any data breach monitoring, password management, malware or malicious website blocking is not what a VPN does. Those are just added features that some VPNs throw in to make them seem more important than they are.

Can I trust the VPN providers?

Depends.

Many are dishonest and lie in their advertisements. In addition, a lot of the biggest VPNs are owned by the same companies, giving an illusion of choice. For example you've probably heard of Express VPN or Private Internet Access. They are owned by Kape Technologies, who used to be called Crossrider. It's owned by Israeli billionaire Teddy Sagi, the 4th most wealthy person in Israel. Crossrider was a platform to develop browser extensions that was used to spread ads and malware to users. Crossrider directly profited from harming users until they shut the platform down and pivoted to buying up VPN companies. Yes there were legitimate extensions made with Crossrider, but it's reputation was forever tarnished by allowing malware for financial gain. The companies name was changed to distance itself from these controversies. The Chief Information Officer for Express VPN, Daniel Gericke, was part of a team that hacked accounts of human rights activists, journalists and rival governments for the United Arab Emirates. Lastly, Kape Technologies own VPN reviewing sites: vpnmentor.com and wizcase.com and push their products with these reviews without mentioning the relation.

Does this seem trustworthy to you? That's up to you to decide.

Other big names like Surfshark VPN and Nord VPN operate under the same parent company now, but the relation between the two goes back farther. The founder of Surfshark revealed that Tesonet helped create Surfshark and Nord, this relationship was hidden, and now they are together again. Also Tesonet and Nord security were both co-founded by Tom Okman. There is no controversy in this case, it's simply dishonest in my opinion for these big name brands to market themselves like separate services when they are both in the same pocket. It also does not favor users to have their data controlled by ever growing tech corporations, especially those spouting their "privacy" services.

Anyway, this next bit is more on the paranoid side, but I think it's worth mentioning. Some VPNs can be thrown out the window simply because of their location. Most notably the "5 Eyes" countries. Australia, Canada, New Zealand, the United Kingdom, and the United States. No VPN hosted in any of these countries should be trusted as they can be forced to comply with investigations. Allies of the 5 eyes that assist in surveillance are Singapore, Israel, South Korea, Japan, Denmark, France, the Netherlands, Norway, Belgium, Germany, Italy, Spain, and Sweden. You don't really need to worry about this as a normal user, but I'm just mentioning it as VPNs in these countries can be compelled to give up their users data, should there be any data to begin with, as they claim to "keep no logs". I'm just trying to prove a point here that true privacy is difficult if not impossible to achieve.

TLDR: Here's a summary

At the end of the day it will hide your activity from your ISP, but reveal it to the VPN provider instead. It will hide your real IP address from any website you visit. It will NOT hide your activity from that website, as they need to serve you the content you access. It will NOT hide your identity from websites you are logged into or even if you aren't logged in as you've been uniquely identified by browser fingerprinting or other methods. If you use Google but suddenly are in another country, Google is not fooled.

Everyone can see that you are using an IP that belongs to a VPN company. The thing is ultimately most websites don't really care. Netflix doesn't care that you want to watch a show that's available in Canada but not in the US. So if that's what you want it for, then yes it's fine. Just make sure your VPN works for streaming as not all of them do. You are not increasing your privacy or security if you are logged into your personal Netflix account that has you name, email, credit card, etc. It's just common sense. Your ISP doesn't care that you torrent, they send you those letters to appease copyright holders.

Your data on public wifi is being encrypted even without a VPN. Unless you are using a non encrypted website for some reason. The only thing a VPN would do is hide what websites you are accessing from anyone who is monitoring that. Also it would hide the public wifi's IP from whatever website you access. You are secure without the VPN because modern websites use HTTPS, which means your connection is encrypted by default.

It does not protect you from malware or otherwise, though some VPN providers add protection. This really has nothing to do with VPNs and implying it's the VPN itself that protects you is misinformation.

Recommendation for security: Bitdefender. There is a free option.

Recommendations for VPNs: Mullvad, Proton, IVPN.

Recommendations for browsers: Firefox (Best choice for the average person. Don't use default settings if you care about privacy. Look up how to harden Firefox), Tor (slow and not very convenient but its more private than Firefox), or Mullvad broswer (Honestly this is too far for the average user and will be very inconvenient.)

Specifically for iPhones and iPads: you will want to use safari with adguard. Other browsers on IOS are just safari with a different look due Apple's rules.

Specifically for Android: Mull or Cromite

Anyway. Just sayin' if you use Google or anything owned by Meta (Facebook), Microsoft, or own a smart phone, which is most people, privacy isn't really a thing. But you can minimize tracking I suppose.

[oxfordcomma-alt]

Online Presences, the "AO3 Curse", and Spirituality - A Longpost

Many witchy and spiritual folks online use wards and protection spells on their physical spaces and selves.

But not their virtual counterparts. Now, hear me out.

In fanfic circles, there's a phenomenon lovingly referred to as "the AO3 curse", where an author has chronic bad luck rendering them unable to update their fics. I myself have horrendous luck, and happen to be a writer - although you're lucky if I can get an update out once a month.

Now, for most, the "curse" is an ironic stack of coincidences, a funny string of misfortunes - for most, it's a harmless joke about writers down on their luck.

However, as a deeply spiritual person, I believe there is something else at play.

(rest of the longpost/essay post under the cut)

Now, I'm not saying there's an evil miasma around AO3, or a malicious web dev putting curses into the code of the site.

And that's because, simply put, the "curse" doesn't work like a normal curse - because it isn't one.

When you post something online, especially something you worked hard on, like a beautiful art piece, or a new chapter of a fic - you are pouring energy and emotion into that work. In a sense, you are baring your soul for the world to see.

That leaves you wide open for negative energy (intentional or not).

You can have the best wards around your physical self and your space, but if you don't protect yourself online, you are going to leave yourself defenceless.

Intentionally or not, the internet is full of negative energies - hate comments, doomscrolling, trolls, scammers and scalpers, and even just people who don't like you or what you create. For many, it's a place to share their passions and their secrets in equal measure. In more ways than one, your online presence is an extension of yourself, and often, a deeper and more personal one.

And yet, even for witches and spiritual folk, it goes completely unguarded.

I believe this, not any actual curse, is the cause of writers' bad luck over on AO3, and many cybercitizens' misfortunes and woes.

It is vital to cleanse and ward - even banish - your online presence of negative energies.

Now, how do we do this?

The Internet isn't a physical space that you can put a salt circle around, or a physical person you can expel energy out of. But it's still simple to protect yourself.

You can:

Place warding sigils on your devices (for instance, a sticker on your laptop or router, or a slip of paper in the back of your phone case)

Use normal cleansing methods (smoke, sound, crystals, etc) around your device, with a selected account open (for instance, having your Tumblr profile up while doing a smoke cleanse around your computer)

If you can picture things, imagine a ball of cleansing and banishing energy, and release it out into your digital space

Use incantations or chant to rid your digital world of negativity

Incorporate sigils into profile pictures, text dividers, profile banners, or a watermark in your art

Use emojis like runes, and create spells in text fields (just make sure to dodge any problematic emoji combos)

Using these techniques, and just about anything else you can think of, you can protect your digital self, and avoid these quasi-curses through simple defence.

[beloved-belittled]

Self-Aware MKX Shinnok x Reader (2/2)

Click here for Part 1

My first complete story on Tumblr! Although, I'm heavily, HEAVILY, leaning towards writing an epilogue for this. Enjoy!

TW: Yandere, kidnapping, stalking, invasion of privacy, blackmail, hacking, viruses, murder/death, slight/implied NSFW

18+ to interact

The next few months of your life pass without fanfare. Your computer seems fine after your encounter with Shinnok. Soon enough the memory of it vanishes into the recesses of your mind. Life goes on. You continue with your daily business unbothered.

However, from that moment onward your PC becomes a ticking time bomb. Within an hour of use, Shinnok manages to gain full control of every process in your computer. You aren't even able to turn it on/off without his permission. If attached to a power source, he's now able to run 24/7 without your input. This accomplishment brings him closer to bringing about the apocalypse.

Shinnok doesn't stop at infecting your computer. He wants access to everything you own. Transferring himself into your router was rather simple. Now, anything in your household that connects to the Internet is compromised. He slithers his way into all your electronics, holding a particular interest in your cell phone. At this rate, even if you got rid of your computer it'd be pointless. He has eyes and ears nearly everywhere in your house. And now, with his control over your phone you often bring him wherever you go.

However, your household is merely a speck of dust to him. He needs more than control over your devices for all of his plans to come to fruition. He begins spreading viruses throughout the Internet, letting them worm their way into anything he can. He eventually penetrates the most secretive, secure, and important data systems of the world. For now, his infections lie there in wait. A few more pieces must fall into place before he can act.

Once satisfied with the spread of his influence, his attention once again focuses on you. Shinnok, in all his ego, is still slighted by your rejection of him. No matter how small of a disrespect he simply can't ignore it. He desires to punish you. Both for your actions and for these warm emotions you're causing in him. He has the perfect plan for this.

If you're employed, say goodbye to your job. He will send the nastiest text to everyone in your company's database, even revealing information that should be confidential. It doesn't matter how much you try to plead your case. no one at work wants to hear you out. You're fired with cause, making it virtually impossible to file for benefits (if applicable) in the meantime. But that's not all! He also destroys your education records, making it so there's no proof of you ever attending school in their systems. Good luck convincing anyone who works there to help you. It's not their transcripts that got deleted after all.

Naturally, you're heartbroken from this. You might even reach out to a few friends or family members for support. They never respond. The text, email, or phone call you send is blocked by his powers. This also extends to looking for a new job. If you try to apply online they'll never receive your application. Unless you have a way to physically be there, you're completely isolated from the world.

Don't make the mistake of crying somewhere he can observe you. He gets sadistic pleasure from it, loving your sobs and trembling body. Look how weak you are before him. Your tears are gasoline to his fiery obsession. He works on making you cry more often. At the same time however, a tiny part of him wishes to comfort you. To be able to embrace you and lie that everything is alright. In those moments he's painfully aware of his lack of a physical body.

He leaves you alone for the next few days, letting the despair sink in. But he's back like an intrusive thought. This time bringing some heavy ammunition. He texts you from an unknown number, threatening to leak your most sensitive information unless you do as he says. He isn't bluffing, making sure to include addresses, financial information, and even personal videos/images you hoped would never see the light of day. Naturally, you're inclined to listen to him even if just to buy time.

Shinnok's first few orders to you are a bit odd. From your perspective at least. He has you install microphones, cameras, and speakers in every room of your house. The equipment to do so arrives on your doorstep in a mysterious package. You do as he asks, assuming that you could just turn it off when needed. But of course, your stalker always knows when you've disabled it. A few firm warnings is enough for you to stop trying. His next demand is for you to get a TV in your living room. Doesn't matter if you have one or not, he wants you to set up the one that is delivered to your doorstep. Questioning how he's even getting this stuff is a fruitless endeavor on your end.

By the end of it, your house is wired up to the point that he can monitor you anywhere 24/7. And that's what he does: making sure to add his sardonic commentary. Eating anything? He'll call you a pig if you dare drop a single crumb on the floor. Sleeping? “Your snores are loud enough to wake the dead.” He grumbles when you awake. Bringing someone over? He doesn't say anything, but it's amazing how you can order a hit over the dark web. You don't see that person alive again after that.

His comments aren't the only thing making your life hell. He likes to test just how far he can stretch your boundaries. Will you put on any clothing he asks of you? Even if it's barely more than a scrap of fabric? Can he make you eat food off the floor, gnawing on the spilled meal like a dog? What if he asks you to touch yourself? Would you do it showing your shame before the fallen God? He has to learn the answer to these questions.

But even with all this he's unsatisfied. He's beyond frustrated at still being trapped behind circuitry. At first, he thought entering your world would be as easy as traveling through the realms. He viewed the computer he was trapped in to be a box, rather than realizing he was the box. No method nor magic could give him the form he desired. Or at least that's what he thought.

You remembered it like yesterday. The day when the whole world went offline. No one could access the internet or their digital devices, and all telecommunications were halted in an instant. The globe that was so connected unraveled in mere moments. People were confused, but no one knew the real extent of the problem until more than a day had passed. All e-commerce came to a sudden halt, deliveries to important industries such as food and healthcare went unfilled. The blackout caused shortages in every way possible, and once that happened chaos spread across the world.

Before the shutdown your hacker demanded you “get supplies.” Food, medications, cash, and other necessities. You briefly wondered if this was lucky timing or if he had prior knowledge of this. Nonetheless, at this point in time Shinnok has full control over you. Your finances and other things leading to freedom have long since been seized. Your only option for escape is to live out in the woods with zero access to technology. Of course, you choose not to go down that path.

While the world is burning down you're doing relatively OK, sheltering in place until this all blows over. You've occupied yourself with doodling since connections are down. You haven't heard from your hacker at all, but that's reasonable as they shouldn't be able to spy on you in the world's current state.

You're interrupted by a shrill scream from outside, followed by several other yells. The sound carries all the way to your front door. It wasn't unusual to hear… Commotions outside, as people rioted and wreaked havoc on one another. Still, you immediately went on high alert. You grab a makeshift weapon and approach your door. Peaking through the window next to it grants you an unbelievable sight.

There were “things” flying in the sky, their appearance a mockery of gargoyles and demons. They possessed an incredible stature, which made them only more intimidating when paired with their sharp teeth and claws. They had glowing, blue bodies that seemed to flicker with every movement. They peered down below, looking at everything as though it were mere prey. And that's what the humans you saw scrambling and screeching outside were, being butchered and carried off to God knows where. You stare in disbelief, believing for a moment that you were simply imagining things. However, a headless body is slammed through your window -shattering the glass and landing into your quarters with a harsh thud. Staring at the corpse, glass shards, and the hellish monster now heading your way causes you to realize that imagination or not -you need to get moving fast.

Your legs can't carry you fast enough as you bolt towards your bedroom. You hear a swoosh announcing the gargoyle-like creature's arrival in your home. You quickly duck into your closet, shutting the door with as much silence as possible. For several moments everything is quiet. Although, you swear that if you focused hard enough you could hear slurping.

You stay put, willing to wait in there for hours if needed. But, through the silence, the softest of footsteps were approaching your room. You could just barely hear them, even when they moved into your room and before the closet. You were ready for action. The moment the intruder opens the door you would bust out their kneecaps.

What you didn't expect was for a face to clip through the door, followed by their neck and arms. Nor did you expect to recognize the face as… Shinnok from Mortal Kombat? But to say that he was an exact replica would be a lie. He was covered in a strange electric-blue glow, which constantly pulsed and sparked. His form looked glitched, parts of his body randomly distorting then fixing itself. He was terrifying to look at -especially while towering at least a foot over you. He looks beyond excited to see you, reaching out a staticky hand towards your face.

“I-I.” You stutter, then swing at him with your weapon. It phases through him simply parting air molecules. He ignores your attempt at an attack. His electrified palm reaches your cheek, the contact resulting in tiny shocks everywhere he touches. “Finally.” He starts, “I am able to touch what's mine after so long.” He withdraws his hand, the needling touch parting with him. Your contact with him isn't lost for long as he wraps you in a deep embrace. You feel tingly everywhere your bodies meet, especially on your head where he then rests his chin.

You hear him sigh. “Do you know how painful it's been?” His grip tightens, causing the tips of his nails to dig into your back. “For me to only be able to watch you and the world? To only exist within the confines of a screen with no physical body?” He leans back to look you in the eye. “No. I know that you don't understand. But don't worry, you will very soon.” He wrestles you out of the closet with his superior might. You scream and struggle but his grip is inescapable.

You're carried off like a petulant child to your PC. It's been sitting there collecting dust ever since the blackout. Eerily, its screen glows a pure white, brighter than what you've ever been able to set it to. Shinnok pauses at the device before speaking. “Look, here is where we first met. Fitting that it'd be the gateway for our eternity together.” You wish you knew what he was talking about.

He pushes your face towards the screen. There's an indescribable pull emitting from it, a force trying to suck you inside. “Goodbye, my love. I'll be seeing you shortly.” Your face touches the screen and in an instant you feel yourself being stretched. Pulled in all directions your body becomes taffy and you lose the ability to move. You remain in that state for seconds, then a stinging sensation spreads all across your body. Every nerve on your body feels poked by a needle. Had you the ability still you would've shrieked. Instead, you lay there helplessly in agony.

Eventually, all your pain fades into numbness. You can even feel your spaghettified form melding back into shape. But you have no idea where you are. You're sitting in a pitch black area unable to even see your outstretched hand. There's no sound, no temperature, nothing at all. You're acutely aware of the fact that you aren't even breathing.

You could've sat in that void forever. But, a feeling of electricity in your ears later and you can hear someone speaking to you. “Can you hear me, (Y/N)?” You don't respond, but as if reading your mind he continues on. “Perfect. It seems that the interfacing was a success.” A swoosh sounds in front of you when Shinnok appears. He's noticeably normal in appearance. Somehow, he's the only thing that you can see in this place.

“Welcome to your new home.” He states. The scenery surrounding you changes, becoming a hellscape not unfamiliar to you. “I can make this world as unpleasant as possible or-” he stops mid-sentence for the environment to shift again. You're in a lush forest that you're sure you’ve seen before. “Or, I can shape this world to your wildest dreams.” His hands fold behind him. “So, which one will you choose?”

This time you choose wisely.

[greyias]

My internet woes continue, which is very much a first world problem, but one that may make me have to like... actually drive into the office all five days a week (which is just... ugh) if this doesn't get resolved soon.

Now the good news is I don't have a complete internet outage, and when it deigns to actually connect (and not just time out), I have my full speed. The problem is just that... it likes to drop out. Like constantly.

I'm sad to report that I almost indulged my inner-Karen around noon, because after dealing with tech support for nearly an hour (in which I eventually had to connect my laptop to my phone's hotspot so the chat wouldn't get disconnected and boot me back to the beginning of the process), I got the tech repair appointment that was unceremoniously cancelled last week without any warning rescheduled. Before I disconnected the chat I was asking "what are my options if this suddenly gets cancelled again", and the poor agent who is definitely not paid enough to deal with my ass says "don't worry, it won't happen again". I get a text message confirmation of the repair appointment.

All is well.

...and then fifteen minutes later I get a follow-up text message from AT&T that mysteriously there's an "outage" in my area again, and the appointment is put on hold. I log in to my web portal. It says my appointment is on hold because there's an outage.

I scroll down to see the local outages, it's reported as all clear! But diagnostics has found an issue.

You can understand my confusion. Among other strong emotions.

My eye starts to twitch as I hop back into chat, go through the virtual assistant death spiral until I can get a hold of an actual person so I can beg to get my appointment back and they're like "I can't do that there's an outage in your area", and that eye twitch starts get a little out of hand. I am practically begging for the person on the other end to just please, please restore my appointment. There is no outage. I've pulled up the map, it's literally three miles to my northeast, nowhere in my vicinity.

She offers me a partial credit while I am already madly dialing in to talk to someone live, so I can descend into full Karen mode and demand to speak to a manager. I am not proud of myself in this moment, but I am at least still in possession of enough tact to be polite and tactful to the person who picks up the phone (after being on hold for about 10 minutes. No automated messaging system, I will wait with the hold music thank you. I do not have any trust a real person will call me back).

I finally get a real person on the phone and am like "please, please just restore my tech appointment. Please don't make me have to go into the office 5 days a week to work". I mean, in between once again explaining everything that has happened.

And finally, finally I have someone speak to me straight and explain what the hell is going on. Basically the hurricane last week actually did cause damages to various cable/infrastructure, and they're having issues tracking down what's causing a widespread issue, and also yes, I'm not the only one who's been going through this merry-go-round of tech support/intermittent connection.

There is actually no ETA on when my internet will actually be restored in full, because they honestly don't know what's causing the issue. And honestly, I'm a lot more understanding about that, because at least it's upfront and clear. He was also kind enough to actually tell me how to bypass the inane "try restarting your router through the app" 5x in a row nonsense if my issue persists after this "outage" is supposedly fixed (basically just call in again and talk to a real person).

So the TL;DR is... my Shroedinger's internet will continue for a while it seems. Pour one out for us ever finishing Greedfall on stream in a timely manner.