#Video games have GOT to stop making this type of character I'm losing my MIND

[cat-of-starlight]

Liking characters in media is funny because there's unfortunately this fun and distinct line between "Oh its like this character was made to appeal to my tastes (Affectionate)" and "This character was made to appeal to my tastes... (nononono noT AGAIN)"

[twjournals]

What's Wrong is Right

This is the sequel to So Wrong It's Right.

The finale: The Right Place

Warning: dark!Peter Parker x reader, age gap BUT BOTH CHARACTERS ARE OF AGE, DUB-NON, pregnancy, mentions of abortion

PLEASE READ MY WARNING BEFORE CONTINUING. I am not responsible for your media consumption. Any and ALL negativity will be blocked. The majority of my content is 18+.

Word Count: 7k

Summary: You’re an old troubled friend of May’s. Your life consists of being a workaholic, a party animal, and bringing home the shittest of guys for a one-hit-wonder. Just when you get your life in order, you’re knocked right back into your old habits. Peter has watched you suffer long enough. He can make it all better.

Taglist: @discoverwhattheworldhastooffer

Things could not have felt any better than they did right now. You were still sound asleep beside him on the bed. You were so peaceful when you sleep, so perfect. Even with your hair a mess and what was left of your make-up on your face Peter still thought you were the most beautiful girl in the world.

As much as he could sleep, he did not want to miss a second of you. He longed to touch you again, to kiss you awake and go another round or two. He could stay the whole day in bed with you if you would let him. The thought of you coming undone underneath him replayed in his mind and his cock twitched in response. He needed to calm himself down, but that felt nearly impossible around you. The only thing stopping him was the fact he knew you needed the rest.

Peter laid on his side, taking in the sight of you. He could not understand how guys would use you the way they do, how they could hurt you and be okay with it. He could not understand the type of guys you went after either. They were all the same. It was almost like you were signing yourself up to get hurt. Peter just wanted to take all that pain away. He wanted to be the guy you needed. He was the guy you needed.

He let a sigh before pressing a warm kiss to your head. Sleep had finally won the battle. He let his eyes fall shut as his arms held your sleeping figure close. If only he could fall asleep like this every night.

When you awoke, the sun was shining bright the small cracks in your blinds, and seemed even brighter than usual considering your hangover. You rub your head as it ached. If there was one thing you did not miss about drinking, it was this.

You froze still when you felt the grasp around your body grow a little snugger. You were scared to see who was in bed with you. You tried to think for a moment, thinking back to last night. It was such a faint memory, a blur. Could it have been your ex? There was no way. Even drunk, you would not have fallen into that trap. You peaked over your shoulder, instant regrets washing over you. What had you done? You were in fact naked so there was no doubt what you had done last night.

May was going to kill you.

Your phone buzzed on the nightstand beside you as if on queue and you glanced over at it. Oh my god, May! You were dead. Your heart was beating so hard it could have beat out of your chest. You were panicking. You carefully eased out of Peter's grasp to keep from waking him, resting his arm back on the bed. You grabbed a big shirt you had still laying on your floor and a pair of underwear from your dresser before hurrying out the door, closing it behind you.

You tugged your shirt in a hurry before you answered it on the final ring. "Hello?" You tried to play it cool, holding your phone against your ear with your shoulder as you pulled your panties up your legs.

"Good morning sunshine. How are you feeling?" She greeted you.

You started down the hallway to the kitchen. You would feel the aching of your core with every step you took. "Tired." You admitted, moving behind the counter to start a pot of coffee.

"I bet. You needed last night though with everything going on." You bit your bottom lip.

You could not agree more, but you wondered to yourself just much of it as actually needed. You leaned against the counter, watching the drip of the coffee as it filled the pot. "You're not wrong."

She laughed slightly. "I'm just glad Peter could take you home. I always get nervous when you go home with random strangers." Your teeth sunk further into your bottom lip. "Speaking of Peter, do you know where he is?" Your heart was beating so out of control, you were surprised it wasn’t a heart attack in the making. The thought of losing May as your friend after these years, especially over something as big as this, it pained you.

You had to think and think fast. "I think he mentioned something about going to Ned's. I’m not entirely sure though.” You reached into the cupboard to retrieve a mug. "He probably stayed the night." You lied, trying to control your breathing as you poured yourself a cup of coffee. You prayed to yourself in hopes that your lie would be enough. Or what if she already knew Peter was still at your apartment? No, no, she could not have, not sounding this collected.

"I should have guessed that. I'll try to call him again later." She sighed. "I just worry about him sometimes."

"I'm sure he's fine. He's not a kid anymore, May." You reminded her, though a part of you felt like it was a reminder to you as well. If he had not have been who he was, maybe this all would have been a different situation but not when your friendship was on the line.

"I know, I know. It's just the Aunt in me I suppose"

You mixed in your cream and sugar and stirred. "It's Peter and Ned we're talking about, May. They were probably up playing video games all night."

"You're right." She finally admitted. "Well, I'm sorry for waking you. I just wanted to check on you."

"No worries. Let me know when you hear from him." She agreed before you ended the phone call with a goodbye.

You finally let out a deep breath of air. It felt like you had been holding it the entire time you were on the phone. It would not have surprised you if you had. You did not know where to start or how to make it all make sense. Maybe that was because none of this made sense. Peter could not be anymore more than a friend, especially when he was your best friend's nephew.

How had this even got this far? You had never thought of Peter like this and yet you ended up in bed with him. You held the mug, letting it warm your hands as you stared down at your coffee in thought. Peter had been nothing but good to you, but this had been more than you could have asked for. There was a hole in your heart from another man and you had pushed yourself on Peter last night to try and heal it. That’s what you had made yourself believe. You took had taken advantage of his kindness, took things too far and now you had to get things back in one piece.

This was nothing like the hookups you had in the past. This was Peter. It was not like you would never see him around again. It was not like you could just throw him out and be done with it.

You jumped instantly when Peter's voice pulled you from your thoughts. You pushed yourself off of the counter, taking in the sight of him as he moved across the kitchen over to you.

“Good morning.” He smiled and you glanced at his messy hair sticking up in different directions. It was the perfect mix of bed head and sex hair.

“Hi.” You said shyly. How would you break the news to him? God, how could you get yourself in this situation?

“I was looking forward to waking up to you.” He moved over to you, his arms wrapping around your waist as if this were all normal and pressing a kiss to your jaw. Your eyes met his curiously. What was he thinking this was?

“Peter, I think- I think we need to talk.”

Your breathing was shuttered as he held onto your waist, nudging his nose against your neck.

“Oh? What about?” He looks down at you.

Your free hand was pressed against his chest with a sigh. “Did you want some coffee?” You offered.

His eyes lingered on you for a moment as if he was trying to figure out what you were thinking before letting go of your waist. “No, thank you. Is everything okay?” He tilted his head slightly. You seemed nervous.

You took a hold of his hand, placing your mug down on the counter before leading him into the living room. You brought him over to the couch, sitting down. “So last night… can you tell me what happened? I know we had, ya know, but how?”

His face grew pink with a slight blush. “How?” He repeated your question.

“I mean, did I make you? I know I can be a bit much when I drink.”

“What? No.” He shook his head. “I mean it surprised me, but of course, I wanted you. I’ve always wanted you.”

You grew quiet, trying to process what he was saying. You sighed. "Peter, I-" I tried to gather your thoughts together. "It should have never happened and I'm sorry that it did."

Peter's eyes grew wide as he tried to take in what you were saying, but he could not bring himself around to believe you.

"No. You don't mean that." He shook his head.

You frowned. "I do mean that."

He shook his head again. "You don't. You told me I was good to you. You even said before you hope you meet someone even half amazing as me."

"Peter-"

"You kissed me! How can you say this should have never happened?"

You run your fingers through your knotted hair and pushing it back out of your face with a sigh. "Peter, I was drunk. I wasn't thinking clearly."

"Drunk words are sober thoughts. Even if you hadn't meant to say it, I know you have been thinking about it." He frowned, taking a hold of your chin and tilting your head to look at him. "Why can't you let just accept how you feel? You deserve to be happy."

You turned your head out of his grasp. "That's just it, Peter. I don't know what I'm feeling about anything. I just had my heart broken a week ago by a guy who I thought was my soulmate. I wasn't ready for any of this to happen. I'm sorry I kissed you and confused you."

He could not believe you were saying this. You could not mean this. Not after last night. Not after the word you clung to him. Not after everything you said. It hurt his feelings. He opened his mouth to say something, but the words would not come. He was not sure what to say. He did not want to overstep, but he could not understand how you could easily fall for assholes like Chris and never a good guy like him.

"You are good to me." You admit. "You have taken good care of me in the past, but we can't be anything more than friends. We can't do this again. I feel like I have overstepped a line with May. She wouldn't want this."

"It's not about what she wants." He snaps. "I can make my decisions for myself now. I'm not a kid anymore, Y/N."

"Peter, you will always be a kid to me. You can do so much better than me. Someone closer to your age. Someone who has their life together. You are such a great guy. I know you will make some girl very happy." You smiled reassuringly, though to him none of this was reassuring.

There was no "better than you", even when he was committed to you. He tried to understand that feeling was new to you considering you always felt in competition with other girls. Truth be told, no one came close to comparing to you in his eyes. He wished he could make you see that, make you understand just how much you really meant to him.

He could feel his phone vibrating again and he sighed, standing up from the couch. He knew it was May. "I should go before Happy sends out a search party."

You stared up at him, nodding slightly. "I understand."

He threw his hand up in an awkward wave before making his way to the door.

You stood up from the couch, hugging yourself. "Hey, Peter?"

He stopped at the door, holding it open and looking over his shoulder at you.

"I don't want this to ruin our friendship." It could never. You just needed time, he thought to himself.

"It won't." He smiled at you. "I promise."

---

Even though you did not want it to affect your friendship with Peter, you both knew that it had, for better or for worse. You did not see much of Peter after he left your apartment that day, even when you would go see May, the house was already quiet. Neither of you had mentioned a word to May. Peter was always out or on his way out when you showed up. You would only really had time for a quick "hey" before he was on his way. You figured college had him pretty busy for the most part, or Ned, maybe even a girl.

He had properly busied him in hopes to give you space. In hopes, you would realize things on your own and do the right thing. He may have been between college and keeping an eye on the neighborhood, but he never strayed far from you. He never failed to keep an eye out on you. Peter knew how much you needed him, but it was your turn to realize that for yourself.

Peter wasn't the only one keeping himself busy. After some time you had taken off, you finally had gone back to work. In a way, you were glad you had because it kept you distracted. You had decided it was time to focus on yourself.

You had stopped drinking since the night at the club after realizing the trouble it putting you in and the pain it was actually causing you. Drinking did not stop the heartbreak. It might have slowed it down, but when you were sober again, the ache was still there. Drinking kept you from dealing with it. As much as you wished you did not have to, you knew it was the only way for you to move on.

It had been a month since you split with Chris. Thankfully, you were starting to get back in the groove of things fairly quickly.

You sat at your desk, typing away on your computer when your phone buzzed on your desk. You did not look away from your work until a knock on the window of your office door caught your attention.

Your eyes widened at the sight of Chris on the other side. He lifted his phone, mouthing for you to check it.

You lifted your phone over to check, reading the text from him.

Can we talk?

You blinked, glancing at him before turning back to your computer to keep working.

Your phone buzzed again.

Please.

You looked up at him again. He had his hands together in a plead while he mouthed "please". You sighed, getting up from your desk to answer the door. You pulled the door open and he smiled slightly though you had not attempted to return it.

"I don't know if you've noticed, but I am working." You blunted pointed out.

"I know. I'm sorry for bothering you. I just knew you wouldn't answer my messages. That's the only reason I'm here. I feel like I've had a lot of time to think and I want to talk to you about things."

"Once again, I'm at work." You reminded him.

"When is your lunch then?" He questioned.

You held onto the door. "I don't think I'm gonna take one. I have a lot I need to get done."

He sighed, looking down at you. "Come on. I know you've gotta be hungry." He glanced at his phone to check the time. "Don't you usually take your lunch around this time?"

You tried to stand your ground even though your stomach growled in hunger. You hated when he was right. You hated to give him anything he wanted after how he did you. It amazed you he had remembered what time you took your lunch. Maybe he did pay attention to you after all.

"I'll pay." He insisted. You sighed.

"Fine. Let me get my bag."

You had agreed on a sandwich shop just down the street. You were not in the mood for anything big. You settled down at a table by the window with a wrap and iced water. You took a bite of your wrap, staring out the window at all the traffic on the road.

He was the first to break the silence. "How have you been?"

"Fine. You?" You continued eating, taking another bite.

He had yet to touch his own food. "I've been alright. Can I say something or do you think I am wasting my time?"

"Depends."

"Can you hear me out? Just this once, that’s all I ask."

You sighed, finally agreeing to listen since he had after all bought you food. You sat the rest of your wrap down washing it down with some water while listening.

He sat in silence for a moment to gather his thoughts, trying to figure out where he should start. “I’m sorry for what I did to you and for how I treated you. Nothing I say is gonna take back what I did, but I do regret it all. I know I said some ugly stuff at the club that day. Once again, I know I can’t justify it but I had been drinking and I was coping with losing you. I get that I ruined things. I messed up and you have every right to be mad at me. I was selfish and I never took your feelings into consideration. I didn't think to help you with the wedding because I thought of it as your big day. When it should have been our big day." He leaned against the table, crossing his arms. You pulled your gaze from the window, looking at him for a moment before looking down at your lap. "I missed how spontaneous we use to be. Every day was a surprise. You amazed me every day, but we fell into a routine and I was worried about marriage might be like that." It shocked you that he was even apologizing right now.

"You were so calm when you did it though. Like it was okay for me to see that like you wanted to hurt me." You broke your silence, your eyes finding his and he frowned.

He exhaled a deep breath. "I didn't wanna hurt you. I guess I had convinced myself I had done nothing wrong, but I realize now how bad of a thing I did."

"You could have just talked to me about this before you went and made me feel like I couldn't be enough. We could have put the wedding on hold and fixed this. Sometimes I get carried away with things. I just- I wanted everything to be perfect. I didn't know what you wanted and so I was working twice as hard to get everything to be how I thought you might like it." You wrapped your wrap back up when you lost your appetite. "I think the realization of everything hurt more than walking in on you. Realizing how much I was doing and how little you did-"

"I know and I want to fix that. I want to do more for you and for us. I want to prove to you I can change. We've invested so many years in this. I don't want to throw it all away. I didn't realize how much I needed you until I didn't have you." He reached across the table, taking a hold of your hand and he rubbed his thumb across the back of your hand. It surprised him how didn't pull your hand away and that's how he knew he might have convinced you. He might have a shot again. "If you really are through with me, I do not blame you. I deserve that. Just tell me when and I'll come to get my stuff."

You sat in silence for a moment, thinking to yourself. You were not sure what to say. You never thought he would get this far with his apology. You did not expect him to apologize considering he seemed pretty pleased with himself.

"I don't know what to say right now." You mumbled, looking down at his hand holding onto yours.

He held your smaller hand in between his. "You don't have to say anything. Just think about it. I respect whatever you decide. I just want to know if I have really lost you for good."

"I don't know." You finally admitted, biting your bottom lip slightly and gently taking your hand back from his hold. "I need time."

"Take all the time you need." He ensured.

"We'll see." You glanced at your phone, checking the time. "Thank you for lunch, but I should really be headed back."

He nodded his head, gathering his still wrapped sandwich and drink as you both get up from the table. "I'll walk you back."

--

The rest of your workday felt like a waste considering you could not focus on anything. You did not get done much of anything you had planned to get done. Why did guys have to make things so complicated? If he had just communicated about it before, maybe you would still be together.

You tried to focus on the computer screen in front of you, letting your fingers hover over the keyboard. Focus, Y/n.

You knew you should not want him back. You did not owe him a thing. You knew there would always be the risk he had not actually changed, but he was all you knew. You grew to him. Your life had changed for your future with him. You had been so wrapped up in the wedding, you had not been paying attention to him. But then again, if he had helped, participated in his own wedding plans then so much would not have been on you.

You rubbed your temple, saving your progress and shutting off the computer screen. You were just gonna call it a night. You had a girls' night planned with May and you did not want this to get in the way of your friendship with May again.

You reached into your pocket to collect yourself, shooting May a quick text.

We're still on for tonight, right?

You gathered your papers off of your desk, shuffling them up neatly before pulling them back in its folder and putting them in the drawer of your desk.

Don't be late.

You smiled at her message before pulling open the door to your office.

You had kept your word to May and showed at a decent time. She was setting up for movie night when you arrived. She tsked when she saw how overdressed you were.

"If I had stopped for a change of clothes, I would have been late." You reminded her with a laugh as she entered the living room again with a bottle of wine and a bowl of popcorn. She placed them on the coffee table in front of her.

"You're welcome to grab some clothes of mine." She offered as she sat down on the couch, tucking her legs underneath her and covering herself with a blanket.

You had already stripped yourself from your blazer as you walked down the hallway to May's room. You grabbed a pair of shorts and a shirt from her dresser before going to the bathroom to change out of your pencil skirt and blouse.

You stared at yourself in the mirror as you changed the set of clothes. Your eyes were glued to your stomach, noticing how bloated you looked and frowning slightly. You knew your period would be any day now, but usually, you did not bloat this bad. Your clothes had seemed a little snug today. You shook the thought as you fold your clothes and set them up on the bathroom counter. Your head spinning from everything going. Just when you had thought things were calm, it picked right back up. You left the bathroom, walking towards the living room where May was.

"Hey, Aunt Ma-" Peter called out as he came out of his bedroom, knocking into you in the process. He quickly grabbed a hold of your waist to keep you falling. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-" He started to rumble.

"It's fine. I'm okay." You laughed quietly, making him smile suddenly when his eyes finally met yours. "You wouldn't happen to be avoiding me, would you?" You tease. You understand even if he was, but you had hoped that he was not avoiding you. You did not want to be the reason driving him out of his own home.

He blushed slightly. "Just giving you some space." He told the truth. You hadn't realized how close you two still were.

"I don't need space, Peter. We're okay." Your eyes flickered across his face for a moment, biting down on your bottom lip when you noticed how close he was still holding you. "Peter-"

"Y/n, are you coming? The movie is about to start!" May called out from her spot on the couch. She had already poured you both a glass of wine.

"Did you want to join us?" You question absentmindedly. He smiled at your words. Maybe you were coming around after all.

"I might later. I have some work I need to finish up." He answered, letting go of his grasp on your waist. You nodded before giving him one last look and continuing down the hallway back to May.

You were halfway through the movie when you turned to May, snacking on a few pieces of popcorn from the bowl that sat between the two of you. "So the weirdest thing happened at work today." You started, pulling her attention from the movie. "Chris showed up."

May turned down the movie a little in order to hear you better. Her eyes were slightly wide and you laughed a little at her reaction. "That was my reaction as well." You pointed out.

"Well? What happened? What did he say?" She encouraged you to continue.

Peter had just come out of his room just in time to get a snack along with something to drink. He had been finishing an assignment. He took his earbuds out one by one, hearing you in the living room as he walked through the kitchen.

"Well, he took me to lunch, and basically he apologized for everything. He wants a second chance."

Peter's eyes grew wide, listening to you talk. You did not have to say his name to know who you were talking about. He peaked in the living room at you and Aunt May on the couch, leaning against the wall as he listened in.

"And?"

You shrugged.

"I'm surprised you even let him take you out." May pointed out as she took a sip of her wine.

"Honestly, it surprised me too but I was hungry and he offered to pay so I gave in." You rubbed your arm slightly as you leaned back on the couch.

"So what's the plan?"

You looked over at May, raising an eyebrow curiously. "Plan?"

"Well I mean, what did you say to him?"

You got quiet for a moment. Peter felt as if he was holding his breath just to make sure he heard your answer correctly.

"I told him I would think about it."

May seemed surprised by your answer. Peter, on the other hand, was less than pleased.

"He's all I know. I'm comfortable with him. I don't know how to start over and at this point, it seems pointless." You explained as you picked at the blanket over your lap. "He said he didn't wanna give up when we have invested so much time and that he was willing to prove himself."

"Maybe he needed this. Ya know, like a reality check." May suggested and you nodded your head.

Peter could not believe you were going back. You were giving up. After everything he put through, everything he said, and how worthless he had you feel, you were going back. Had you not learned anything? His fists clenched at his side, trying to keep himself calm. He could not listen to another second of this.

He stormed past you and May. "Hey, Pete-" May started, but Peter swiftly interrupted her.

"I'm going out. Don't wait up." He mumbled. Your heart skipped, realizing that Peter had heard everything. You were so sure he had been in his room. He glanced at you before pulling the door closed harder than usual, making the both of you jump. You frowned, looking down.

--

Peter sat on top of a roof, leaning against a brick wall as he looked down over the city. He did not know what else he could do to prove himself to you. He finally had his chance and you only pushed him away. Chris had years to prove himself and he had. He made his intentions pretty clear, but even that wasn't enough to steer you away.

He was convinced you were scared to be happy. Scared to find that happiness with him when his Aunt was your best friend. Sure you were a little older, but none of that mattered to him. You were the only girl who could ever make him feel the way he did. It could not just be him feeling this way.

The streets were not as busy due to it being so late. Peter closed his eyes with a sigh from the built-up frustration, letting his leg hang over the side of the building. You were so stubborn.

His eyes snapped open at the roar of laughter beneath him. He glanced at the group of men before quickly having to do a double-take when he realized who it was.

"Come on, Chris. Admit it, you have Y/n wrapped your finger." The men shared a laugh, giving Chris's shoulder a playful push.

"Not like I use to, but I know she'll take me back." He chuckled. "She's waited long enough for that ring. She's not gonna give up now."

"You really think you're ready for marriage? What about the other girl?"

"Guess we'll see about that," Chris smirked and Peter's nose flared in anger. "Women like Y/n just need a ring and they're content. Besides, she's the perfect little housewife."

Peter tried to restrain him, but he could only hold himself back so much. He shot a web at Chris which hitting him over the mouth, sending him and his group in a panic trying to pull it off of his face with no luck.

"Dick." He muttered, shooting a web at another building and pulling himself onto the next building. He had enough. Chris didn't deserve someone like you. You deserved someone to take care of you, to cherish you, not just the other way around.

--

You stared down at the test in your hand. You never expected to find yourself here this soon. It was not long after Peter stormed out that you decided you should go home. You were upset with yourself and with everything going on. This was just the icing on the cake. You mindlessly walked by the calendar in the kitchen on your way to the bedroom, counting the days since your last period. You were late and at this point in your life, you could not ignore it.

The positive plus sign stared back at you and your eyes watered. You had not had sex with Chris in months so you knew it was Peter's. You covered your mouth, letting out a sob into your hand. This was not how you pictured yourself getting pregnant. This was not where you wanted to be in life when you planned on getting pregnant. You were barely making it taking care of yourself. You could not take care of a baby too.

Your body shook as you cried at the foot of your bed. You knew with the baby being Peter's, Chris would never want to be with you. Peter was just starting his life, barely even out of college along with being the Amazing Spiderman. You could not interfere with a baby.

A knock on your bedroom window startled you, making you drop the test. You looked the window to find Spiderman kneeled down on your fire escape, motioning for you to let him in.

You wiped your face of your tears and walked over to the window, unlocking it before pushing it up.

"Now isn't a good time, Peter." You stated bluntly, taking in the sight of him in his suit.

"I really need to talk to you, Y/N. It's important."

"Can we not talk about this another day?"

"No, it can't wait." He slipped under your arm into your bedroom, pulling his mask from over his face. "It's about Chris."

You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms over your chest. "What about him?"

"He doesn't love you, Y/n. He will never care about you like you have cared about him. He is just using him as a housewife and that's all you'll be to him. Just someone to take care of him. You deserve so much than him." Peter paced back and forth as he ranted.

You stared at him as he paced. "That's what you came here to tell me? I know you heard me talking to May. I should have known you would come up with some way to make me feel like shit for thinking about going back."

"Y/n, I didn-"

"You did! You don't get it! It's my heart that was broken. I have loved him for years. You don't understand how hard this is for me."

"I don't understand?" His mouth parted at your words. You didn't know half of it. "How do I not when I have loved you years longer than he's been in your life? Even when you loved everyone but me! You fall for assholes like him and the good guys like me go overlooked!" He exclaimed, throwing his hand up as he shifted back, his foot stepping on the test you had dropped on the floor.

He glanced down to see what he had stepped on.

Your eyes got wide, trying to get his attention. "Peter." You stepped toward him but it was too late. He stared down at the pregnancy test, wiping his thumb over the plus sign as if checking to see if it was real.

He looked up at you. "You're pregnant?"

It was too late to lie about it. It would have required too much energy to keep it going if you had, and you did not have any fight left in you.

"How far?" He simply questioned. He was so sure it was his, but he wanted to hear it from you.

"If you're asking if it's yours, I can assure you it is. I haven't slept with Chris in months. I don't know how far I am. A few weeks is my guess."

He stared at the test a little while longer, a smiling forming on his lips. "We're gonna have a baby." He smiled at the test. He couldn't help himself. This had to be the best news he had heard in his life aside from becoming an Avenger.

"No." You shook your head.

He furrowed his eyebrows, looking up at you. "What?"

You moved over to him, taking the test from him and tossing it on your dresser with a sigh. "I can't keep the baby."

He frowned at your words. "Sure you can. What do you mean?"

You shook your head again, your eyes already getting watery again. "I can't, Peter. I'm not ready to be a mom. My life is a fucking train wreck and you're just now starting yours. I can't ruin that for you."

"Ruin? No, no." His frown deepened, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into his arms for comfort. "This is the best news I've heard. This could never ruin my life."

You cried against his shoulder, clenching onto his suit as he held you close in a hug. He pressed a kiss to your temple, stroking your hair down. "I'll do everything I can to keep you and our baby happy. You will never have to worry about another woman because no matter what, I will always choose you. I'll take care of you." He let his hand slide underneath your shirt, rubbing his hand over rounding stomach. "I'll take care of our baby."

You push his hand away out of your shirt, pushing yourself away from him. "I-I can't. I'm not keeping the baby. I'm gonna go to the clinic tomorrow. It'll be better this way."

Peter's mouth fell open slightly as his eyes filled with tears. "Y-You can't be serious."

"I am and nothing is going to change my mind."

"Y/n..." He reached up to cup your face, but you grabbed his wrist. "That's our baby. Don't do this."

You stared at him with tear-filled eyes, some falling down your face, but you didn't speak a word.

He was getting heated by the second. If he thought he was hurt before, he was really hurting now. He didn't understand why you wouldn't take this as your fate and run with it. Run with him. Tears fell down his cheeks. He didn't bother to wipe them, only continued to look at you. He wanted the truth.

"Why? So you can go back to him?"

"This isn't about him."

"Then what is it about, Y/n? You want to get rid of a part of both of us! Can't you see how much I care about you? I would never hurt you like him. You don't have to change yourself to please me. You will never have to worry about not being enough." He moved closer to you, cupping your face in his hands and making you look at him. "You are so perfect, just the way you are. You are more than enough for me."

You try to turn your head to look away, but he leans in, capturing you in a firm passionate kiss. You melted into his kiss, gripping onto his suit. You wanted so badly to push him away, but you couldn't bring yourself to do it. You didn't want him to change your mind. You needed to do this.

He backed you up until your back of your knees hit the bed, letting you fall back on the comforter and falling with you. He supported himself above you, kissing your swollen lips softly as he wipes your face with a swipe of his thumbs.

"You are everything I have ever wanted." He mumbled against your lips, pressing warm kisses over your face and letting them trail down your neck. His hands began to push your shirt up and you quickly regained some focus, trying to catch his hands.

"Peter, we shouldn't..." He caught your hands and pushing them over your head, shooting a web against your wrists to hold them in place against the headboard. You cried as you looked up at him with frightened eyes.

"You don't have to do anything for me. Just let me show you how much I love you. Let me take care of you."

He pressed on his chest, letting his suit go limp on his body and sliding it off as he continued to work his way down your chest. He was left in his boxers. He had pressed your shirt up above your chest, kissing over your breasts and swirling his tongue over your aching nipples.

You whined at the feeling of his tongue, pulling on the webbed restraints. Your nipples were more sensitive than they had ever been before. His hands feel to the shorts you still wear of May's, pulling them down your legs with your panties.

"Peter, stop..." You tried to close your legs but Peter only held them open at the sight of your slick folds. You knew no matter how much you lied to him, your body could never lie to him. Your body only told the truth.

"I want to make you so happy." His lips brushing over your lower bloated stomach, kissing over it and mumbling against it. "You're going to make such an amazing mother."

You shook your head as you wiggled underneath his body. He pushed off his boxers before returning to his place between your legs.

He nodded even when you shook your head. "You will be."

Peter dragged the tip of his cock through your glistening folds, biting his bottom lip as your juices coated it. He let the tip of his cock push against your entrance, pushing his hips forward to slide inside of you and your head rolled back with a whimper.

You hated how much control he really had over you. You hated feeling so weak.

"Peter-" You choked a sob as your walls clenched onto his thick length. You were embarrassed how quickly your pussy pulled him back in when he would thrust.

"Oh," He groaned as his cock pushing in and out of you, hitting you in all the right places as he held your hips in his hands. "I love you. I love you so much." He mumbled against your lips as they brushed together every thrust. His breathing was staggered against them.

You could not fight the lust that clouded your mind. He knew it would take time to steer you in the right direction, but he was willing to spend all the time he needed. You knew how wrong it was to be underneath him, even if you were stuck there, that did not stop what was wrong from feeling so right.

[blueeyedgeorgie]

Cancelled-Dream Was Taken

A/N: Surprise bitch. Weren’t we expecting for me to release mcyt fanfics soon? If I didn’t tag my usual @‘s it’s because idk if you’d like to be tagged for mcyt content.

Pronouns: she/her

Word Count: 2.3k+

_________________

"You're so harsh on him!" Her hands sat on the keyboard, staring at the green human that stood on Y/n's computer screen.

She needed to be careful. While this was a heated moment, she couldn't let herself get too loud for multiple reasons. If she got too loud, Dream's stream viewers would be able to tell she was in the next room or they would just receive noise complaints from their neighbors.

"No Y/n! You're too soft on him! He needs to learn that he can't get away with everything. You're setting him up for failure." As the h/c girl listened to her roommate speak, she had to remind herself over and over again; 'This wasn't real.' Dream was mad, not Clay.

This had all been arranged as roleplay. Y/n would be leaving in a few days to go visit some of her family for a reunion, so Wilbur had been the one to think up the brilliant idea of what was playing out now; an argument between Y/n and Dream. The plan was to have Y/n get so upset she didn't log onto the SMP for the next few days, only to come back with a master plan to backstab Dream.

At first, Clay wasn't really on board with the thought of him getting angry at Y/n. They had been together for a little over a year, there wasn't a single moment they had gotten upset with one another. But surprisingly, Y/n had been the one to convince Clay it was a good idea.

The fans knew Dream and Y/n had a close friendship, Dream had always been so protective of her. But when this was going down, they didn't know how to act.

Every time Y/n would glance at her chat, she'd see thousands of comments rising up as new ones appeared. Comment after comment, it looked like the fans were shocked by the way this stream was turning out.

"I'm not setting him up for anything! He's a kid, Dream!" Y/n glanced from the chat,  back at the screen showing her PC game. Standing on her screen was Dream and Tommyinnit, she had accompanied Dream to visit Tommy.

"You're just babying him! 'He's a kid!' Well, he needs to learn to grow up eventually," his voice had been filled with such spite. It felt weird to hear Clay speaking to her like this in such a tone.

For a moment, she stared at the green man before a short scoff escaped her lips. "I can't believe you." With that, Y/n had pressed a few keys, turning her character towards the nether portal a couple of yards away. Before Dream had gotten the chance to speak again, Y/n began to move away.

"Y/n! Come back here!"

She flicked a few buttons, taking a moment to look behind her character to see Dream following. Good, everything was going according to plan. Within the next few minutes, she'd be able to log off and she'd be on vacation for the next few days.

The h/c girl ignored the green man as she stepped through the portal, taking her to Minecraft's version of hell. Almost done, she just needed to find a good spot to stop as she listened to Dream continue to speak.

"You can't keep ignoring me! You know I'm right in this. You know you can't keep defending Tommy. You know Tommy is driving a wedge between us-"

Perfect. Y/n had stopped just on the edge of a bridge, molten lava sat feet below them. If she fell, she'd surely die. "No."

"No?" Dream was a bit surprised to hear Y/n cut him off, but he stayed silent as he was prepared to listen to what she had to say.

"No. No more. I don't wanna hear you blame Tommy for us breaking apart. I want you to listen to me. You've been acting like much more of a dick than usual and I hate it. I despise it. You've changed for the worst because you think you can step on everyone. At this point, everyone fears to tell you the truth-except me. I'll be a hundred percent honest with you, you've been so egotistical, it's really pissed me off. This is your fault, Dream. Not Tommy's. You exiled a child for pulling a prank on a vacation house! Not even George's real house!"

"But-"

"Shut the fuck up. I'm done, but I don't wanna hear you bullshit me. So shut the fuck up."

A moment of silence passed between them as Y/n stared at her screen. Just a few more steps.

And within seconds, Dream had pulled out his netherite sword. With one hit, she was falling back into lava. Y/n glanced at her chat, a look of shock on her face as she read over what a few comments said. A moment of silent tension had passed before Y/n had finally spoken up, removing her from the voice chat she was in.

"Alright guys, I guess that's enough for the day. I'll see you all... later." With that, she had clicked a few buttons, raiding Dream's live-stream as she ended hers.

For the next 20 to 30 minutes, Y/n knew Clay would be busy streaming. So she had decided to take a bit of time to wind down and think to herself.

Get a glass of water.

'Are the fans harassing him in his twitch chat?'

Sit down on the living room couch.

'The SMP fans were always so protective of me.'

Pet Patches.

'Was I too much when I snapped at him?'

It didn't seem like 30 minutes had passed when Clay had walked out of his streaming room, only to find Y/n on the couch with Patches in her lap. "Hey, N/n." "Oh, your stream is already over?" Y/n smiled, pulling herself out of her thoughts as she scoot over, giving Clay room to take a seat right by her.

"Yeah, did you lose track of time or something?"

"I must've. How did the chat react after I 'died'?" She smiled up at her boyfriend as he wrapped an arm over her shoulders, pulling her closer into his embrace.

"Everyone was filled with joy that you died."-Y/n playfully swatted at him. "Okay, okay! I got a few chat messages of people bashing me for it, but it's fine."

"Well, it's a good thing the chat wasn't completely littered with hate. How was it after my raid?"

"Honestly, not that bad as you expect. Like I said, just a few comments. Nothing bad, I just ignored it." Clay placed a hand on Patches's head, gently scratching her, followed by the animal beginning to purr.

"Good to hear, anyways... I'm not ready to pack. Do you think we can procrastinate?" The h/c girl let out a huff leaning against her boyfriend. "How?"

"I was thinking a bit of movie binging, cuddling, and ordering dinner?" A cheeky smile spread on her face as she spoke.

"It's like you read my mind."

The couple had made it through three movies, by now it was later at night. The sun had set and they had already door dashed some food. By now they were in the middle of watching 'The Empire Strikes Back.'

'I love you.' 'I know.'

The iconic moment between Hans and Leia had been interrupted by the sound of Clay's phone buzzing. "Why is George calling?"

"What?" Y/n was a bit curious herself. Considering the timezones, George should be asleep right now. Pausing the TV, she turned her attention to her boyfriend's phone.

"Hey Clay."

"What's up, George? Isn't it like early in the morning for you?" Clay raised a brow, moving his phone so Y/n would be able to see George as well.

"Yeah, I had to stay up to fix a YouTube video I need to get out today. I was about to go to bed and I checked Twitter-"

"Oh no." Clay made a short joke, only to be cut off by his friend.

"I don't know if it's trending for you in America, but you might as well look."

"What's going on?" He swiped up, taking him to his home screen so he could click on the little blue bird app. Y/n had grabbed her phone from the coffee table, opening up the app as well. "#Cancel Dream... #Y/n... #Dream SMP"

"Is... is Clay getting canceled for killing me in Minecraft?" Y/n scrolled through the tweets involving the hashtag 'Y/n.' She could see plenty of people defending her, but making it much bigger of a problem than it actually was.

"Oh, hey Y/n. But yeah, he is." George chuckled awkwardly, scrolling through his Twitter app as well.

"This is so fucking stupid."

"It really is. So we might as well get this cleared up with the fans as soon as possible. Do you want me to tweet something, or do you want to?" Y/n looked up at her boyfriend, it looked like he was thinking.

"Yeah, I'll tweet it. Don't worry about this, Y/n."

"Alright, whatever you say," she replied, pulling a blanket over her as she waited for Clay to finish typing his response.

"Here's what I'm gonna say: 'I can't believe you guys actually think me and @(y/n) are in an actual fight in real life. We have been good friends since forever, the fight was only roleplay. I love that you guys are so protective of Y/n, but no one's actually upset.' How's that sound?"

"I think that's good," George hummed softly.

"Yeah, I doubt you'll stay 'canceled' once you've explained to them it was all part of the SMP lore." The h/c girl smiled up at her boyfriend with a small nod.

"Alright, I'm gonna post it. George, I think you should go to bed because you're half asleep already."

Y/n turned, looking at her boyfriend's iPhone. "Go to sleep, Gogy!"

"Alright, alright... I'll talk to you guys later." The call had ended with Clay and Y/n saying goodbye to their friend while George simply yawned to them as a response.

As soon as the call was over, Clay looked at the response to his tweet. It didn't seem to be going too well. There had been a few fans who understood what was going on and responded with a paragraph as an apology for the misunderstanding. But most replies had been telling Clay he was bullshitting the fans or that he wasn't being honest.

"I'm sorry, Clay," his girlfriend had huffed as she read through the responses to his tweet.

"Honestly I'm just a bit pissed off. Literally, any time someone tries to 'cancel' me, it's over something stupid. I'm not a bad guy, it just feels like some people just don't want to see me succeed." Clay had excused himself to grab a glass of water from the kitchen.

It hurt Y/n to hear how upset her boyfriend was. He never got too upset over things, but seemed to take a small toll on him. "Hold on. Let me say something." The h/c girl couldn't be asked to post multiple tweets of her response to hate sent towards Clay over the internet. So what was better than a short video that could be posted to the blue bird app?

"Um, hey guys. I'd just like to make this quick. Stop sending hate towards Dream. The fight was roleplay and nothing more. I'm gonna be busy for the next couple of days so Wilbur thought of a good idea to help build SMP lore with me and Dream and we both agreed to the argument. Now stop sending the green man hate, or I'll commit war crimes or something-"

Y/n had been interrupted by the sound of Clay letting out a small giggle. "What? What did I say?"

"Nothing, just keep going with your video."

"Whatever, I'm cool. No matter what Dream says. Anyways, I'll speak to you all later." Y/n had hit the red button again, ending her video. Within seconds, the video had been uploaded to her Twitter account.

Placing her phone back down on the table, Y/n approached her boyfriend, wrapping her arms around his torso. "I'm really sorry about the hate, Clay. I love you."

"Don't apologize for something you can't control. I love you more." The brunette held his partner close, accepting her hug. Y/n always loved his hugs, she always felt so safe in his embrace.

The rest of the night had been spent with more cuddling and more Star Wars movies. Hours had passed before Y/n had even thought about the Twitter situation again. But for some reason, she had decided to look at the app again tonight.

It was 2 in the morning by now, Clay was half asleep. His head laid in the h/c girl's lap as she brushed a hand through his hair, her free hand opening up her Twitter app once again.

It had been a bit of a surprise to see a couple of trending hashtags had changed so quickly. What was trending now was #Dream, #Y/n,#(ship name), and #Dream's Laugh. This had to be about Y/n's short clip she posted. And by the looks of it, people had stopped acting so harsh towards Clay. But instead, they had decided to focus on the fact Dream and Y/n were hanging out together. Not to mention the fact Dream and let out a stupid little giggle because of Y/n. People had been apologizing to him through Twitter for being so hard on him.

"Babe."

"Hm?" Clay mumbled, not bothering to open his eyes.

"Pretty much everyone is apologizing to you over Twitter for being hardasses."

"Hm, that's good to hear."

"You're really tired, huh?" Y/n paused her scrolling to look down at her boyfriend.

"Yeah," He continued to mumble, followed by a short yawn.

"Alright, time for bed, babe." Y/n smiled to herself, beginning to carefully move away from Clay. "I can pack tomorrow and we can laugh over the stupid bird app tomorrow after you've gotten a good amount of sleep."

"I still can't believe Twitter tried canceling me over roleplay."

"I can't believe you got uncancelled by shippers."

Taglist: @notphilosopherstudentblog

[xo-alie-xo]

PORTWELL LONG GAME OR RINA SLOWBURN.

You can only choose one poison.🍷

Listen up my Wildcats.🐱

We all ship each character with happiness. No matter how much you love to hate them, a majority of us simply adores the characters and want the best for them. Then comes relationships and it's okay to ship our favorites.⛴

I'm a diehard Rina shipper and I know in my heart that they are series endgame. The set up, the natural chemistry, their mutual understanding, the surprises and angst literally put me on chokehold. So I'm 100% a Rina shipper till the end. I'm here for the slowburn and their development rather than one shots. They are worth the pain. 😭❤

Let me start with Ricky Bowen now.

Ricky shouldn't to be with Gina because he's hurting her mentality. He's not insensitive on purpose. Like when he tried to stop Big Red from telling her his message to Nina because he KNOWS it'll hurt her.

If you think, that Ricky didn't understand clearly when Gina confessed, think again. He shushed her. Kept their thing a secret from everyone. He knows he feels some type of way and she feels something too. But this boy is so used to safeguarding his childhood norms and has very little adaptability. Hence, he pretended to ignore everything between them because his home stability was falling apart and he clinged on to Nina, his constant childhood love.

He's a traumatised 16-17 year old boy that needs to heal and grow. This episode was heartbreaking because he had to accept that he had to let Nina go because their once upon a time fairytale had become toxic.

People change. I'm not the same person I was when I was 16 lmao. Being together as childhood lovers means growing together and accepting each other's growth. Which Ricky couldn't. He clutched to the idea of Nini. Even his love confession. It was sooo sweet but all he did was focus on their history.

This boy needs time to heal and maybe seek professional therapy. It would be so DAMN HISTORIC if Disney decides to take psychological issues seriously and show how he's dealing with his anxiety, pills and psychotherapy. He needs to breathe before he can be with any girl for that matter. He's hurting and isn't trying to hurt anyone on purpose. Including Gina.

Him asking her for advice on Nini was a dumb, insensitive move. But he's trying to find a way to build some supportive friendship that they shared in early season one.

As for now, this boy needs to get his own grip on life and heal.

As for our Queen Gina

In Gina's confession, she focuses on their future. She basically said, "I wouldn't quit on a possible future of us being together despite obstacles. Because I never quit. But moving away isn't in my control." Ricky deep down knows this, encouraged her to say it, teary eyed, despite right after getting back together with Nini. Gina is his future. She went to his new house. And I also have this feeling that when she was given a chance to stay, she stayed partly because of Ricky. She left a chance to be with her mom because she prioritised their relationship. Because she never quits. 💪🏼

But she came back and found out Ricky has gotten back together with Nini.😭 What she doesn't know is Ricky got together with Nina before her confession, and after Gina kept dodging his messages. She's hurt and questions why she returned because she isn't particularly close to anyone. Hence, she was so silent at the after party. She thinks it'll be fine, "she'll live", and finds other reasons to find permanence. Her arc this season has been settling down in East High, despite the pain of losing and being 'betrayed' by Ricky, she finds other reasons to stay. 🏡

This kind of contrasts her with Nina. Nina left her dream school and came to Salt Lake because she missed her established home, and not just because of Ricky. Nina returned and was loved and embraced by Ricky Bowen.💕 Gina came back to a semi new place called Salt Lake because of her promise of a future to Ricky. But she got stabbed and she bled. 💔🗡

Think about her situation. She feels confused, alone, heartbroken, out of place and seperated from her mom. She's broken and hurting too. And she doesn't need more from Ricky's accidental or intentional 'sick burns'. That's the one line where he was such a jerk and I can't defend him here. 😠

Here comes the Caswells.

Her second family. A place of healthy stability. A home that accepted her. Ashlyn, her roomie and her confidante. EJ, the misunderstood boy who saw her value and bought her plane ticket.

Let's get to EJ.

At first, I wasn't too keen on seeing Portwell's development. But then that video chat where they talk about the possibility of her staying and him convincing her. Had me sold for a solid brother-sister relationship. Few episodes later, when Gina's pain seemed to be oblivious to everyone, he was the only one who asked her how she was, and saw her glow. The comfort she must've felt.

Not that she needs a man's validation, but she must be feeling like a second choice and feeling a little insecure because of Ricky. But EJ lifts her up and I genuinely saw her smile. This boy has her back whenever. The man she can lean on and truly sees how special she is. She no longer feels alone now that she has his entire fam and other friends. She genuinely feels a place of belonging and happiness when she's the apple of his eye. Notice how happy she is? How happy this boy is? She's going through her own issues and she has found ground with EJ.

I was very doubtful when they started hinting at a romantic direction. Because EJ would be used as plot device again for a girl to get to Ricky.😤 This man doesn't deserve to be second best to anyone, just like Gina.😑 That's why I'm still hesitant on shipping them at least temporarily. EJ needs to be something even more special to Gina. They need to show each other how special and treasured they are to each other despite feeling like rejects. They are each other's source of comfort.

I'm sure they can keep EJ at East High for the next season. Whether it's the drama club, or the AV club or going to a local college. So he will be there for Gina. I don't know how they can work out a relationship with much distance as Rini's fell out when she moved away. So, if EJ leaves again, it'll again shake up Gina. Her being worried whether he'll date college girls, second thoughts, etc. I don't want them to go through that. And if they do move on to romantic Portwell, make sure it's not plot device for Rina. So you can either have Portwell endgame or Rina Endgame.

Basically I want Gina to be treated so right that she understands she doesn't need Ricky. And when he does ask her out, and he makes her feel like a second choice or a rebound, she says NO. Because EJ has helped regain her self assurance. Eventually I want Gina to confide in EJ about her and Ricky. EJ is jealous but also angry about how Ricky has been hurting her. And becomes damn protective of his 'babe'. Ricky gets jealous of their relationship, restarting Ricky and EJ's old rivalry. But this time, it's not because Gina is his girlfriend, but because she's EJ's best friend who he has a crush on and wants what's best for her.

If it's meant to be Rina endgame

EJ- RICKY, YOU IDIOT! You have no clue how to treat her right. You don't put her first. You mislead her. Get the hell away from her! She's too powerful and beautiful, she doesn't deserve your scraps. I know how she feels for you. I wish I were you. I would treat her like a queen. I don't mind even waiting years till she's ready. She deserves that. You're so lucky you have even a small chance that I may never have. So get your act together, prove you're worth it to win her over. All I want is for her to be happy. Even if it's with someone else. And maybe then I'll stop threatening you to stay away from her.😠

Ricky- .....I don't know what I'm more scared of. Change, or losing the girl I fell for or YOU. Okay, losing her but you're a close second.😬

If it's Portwell endgame.

Ricky- I messed up. Make sure you don't mess up with her. You'll regret it forever.

EJ- I'd rather get hit by thousand basketballs than ever hurt her. I'll be her plus one and her best friend until she's ready to be with me. I know she's ready now too. But I want her to know I'm willing to wait till she graduates before we make it official. I'm in it for the long game.

As for their age gap. I'm 100% sure Portwell won't kiss this season. If they do, it'll be next when Sofia turns 18. They are professional actors who are cast because they are the perfect fit for the role and are expected to carry out the storyline. But I suppose fearing some outbursts, they might delay Sofia kissing anyone till next season. It's so weird because Olivia was maybe 17 when Matt was 21-22 when they kissed in season one. But no one had a problem with that. But for this, they do. Remember, they are professional actors. They are acting! Sometimes, actors are over 10 years apart (but above 18) and act as romantic partners.

As for their characters, they are only two years apart. That's hardly any difference once you're over the age of 18. Age of consent is 16. But adults above 18 are only allowed to have sex with adults above 18. So, age isn't a problem here because EJ is a gentleman and is genuinely interested in her and isn't trying to get in her pants. So age isn't the issue when it comes to dating. It's the maturity. Gina is very mature and gives very sound advice. But I can see EJ being patient enough till she turns 18 just to kiss her because he loves her. 😚

As for the Ashlyn remark, "You look like a kid to me rn". He was JOKING.😂 Don't take things out of context. I tell my cousin sister that all the time. But she's three years younger than me and a grown adult. I don't see her as a kid but it's just a cousin teasing her younger cousin that's she's a little immature. I'm Matt's age and I'm very mature for my age and since I was a teenager, I always matched up with boys a little older than me. Now that I'm in my early 20s, I've dated boys even close to 30. So age is just a number.

EJ dating Gina and giving her quick kisses is fine. But to have a strong sexual element in their relationship (including making out), he'll have to wait till she's 18+. And I'm sure for that he'll wait till she's ready even past her early 20s. Age is really just a number and we can't help who we fall in love with. Trust me, I've been there.😂 So I can see EJ feeling conflicted about his feelings that are clear at this point.

They might not be a perfect fit, but they make each other sooo happy. They deserve a lot more than a short lived fling.😟 They are either endgame or Rina is. You can't have both as a Rina unless you're an EJ hater who wants him to exist as plot device. Nope! He's sooo much more precious than that.

But Jack on the other hand....I'm okay if he's the one to make Ricky or EJ jealous. Because he's just been introduced and it's okay if a character is used, but only once, for someone else to realize their feelings. 💁🏽‍♀️

In short.

Ricky needs help and needs to be on his own. No girlfriends allowed.🙅🏽‍♀️🚫

Needs to give both Gina and Nina space for them to grow on their own too.🌳

Ricky needs to understand the core of his problems and become more adaptable via therapy. Maybe the psychologist will point out his unresolved feelings for Gina, or he will conclude it himself. And in comes Ricky-pining-for-Gina season three.

Ricky needs to fully get over Nina before he moves on to anyone. Same for Gina if Portwell were to happen. No one deserves to be second choice.

Gina isn't Ricky's cushion. She's a living person with strong feelings for him and shouldn't be subjected to share his pain. She already struggles with her own issues.

Ricky needs to stay single till he wins back Gina and prove he's worth it. He needs to show even if another girl wants him, he'll never quit on Gina ever again. Even if he has to watch her be with someone else. *cough parallels*.

It's either romantic Rina then Portwell endgame OR Portwell flirty besties but Rina endgame. You and I can choose only one because my boy EJ shouldn't be used as plot device for a girl to leave for Ricky ever again.

Portwell's age difference can be practically solved and isn't much of an issue unless they get hot and heavy before Gina turns 18 which is impossible considering this is Disney. 🤣🤣

Jack and Gina will be plot device material and purely so sentimental to us OG Andi Mack fans. More than any ship, this is what I'm looking for. Sort of an Andi Mack crack ship for season 3a. It's gonna be soooo funny. 😍😂

I respect everyone's ship. I see what you're seeing. And I'm not going to invalidate your ship. But unless it's done right, I won't jump from the Rina ship. I liked Rini. I like Portwell. I like AU Juffy crackship haha.😂 But as for me, I'm still holding on to Rina slowburn.

Preparing myself for the pain. 😭🔥

(But if I had to pair two characters without Disney getting in the way, it would be Gini. The power duo. Undeniable chemistry. They can be written so well because of their layered relationship and contrasting personalities.🤩 The classic rivals to friends to lovers. But that's a talk for another day lmao.)

Thanks for reading my opinion, Wildcat!🐱❤

[crybabysunflower]

The song which reminds me of a Mystic Messenger character

Introduction

I have chosen this song based on how I have perceived this certain character from the otome game. I have chosen this song because the lyrics reminded me of him every time I listened to the song.

The character I have chosen for my blog is Kim Yoosung and the song which reminds me of him is Zombie by the South Korean punk pop band Day6 from their 2020 album, The Book of Us: The Demon

Before I write this blog I would give a trigger warning because it may have mentions of having suicidal thoughts so please read at your own risk.

The Lyrics

"What kind of day was yesterday

Was there anything special

I'm trying to remember

But nothing comes to my mind"

The lyrics above represents hopelessness and pessimism, the lyrics describes how the singer can't recall anything remotely positive happened to him on the previous day, he has been so used to the misery he has been dealing with. This reminds me of how Rika's "death" had severely affected Yoosung's life to the point that his life had come to a standstill, after that incident he had been waking up to face the same monotonous, miserable days which repeats over and over. He did not experience anything positive enough to affect him since the loss of his beloved cousin.

"Today goes by the same

Am I the only one struggling

How do I get through this

Would things get better

If I cry my heart out"

The first line of the lyrics again brings back our focus to the monotonous nature of the singer's life, just like the singer Yoosung too leads a monotonous, colourless life. Just like the lyrics mentioned above, Yoosung feels that he is the only one who is still not over grieving over his cousin since the other RFA members in his perception are seemingly doing well and are succesful in their careers while he is stuck in the past and wasting away his life. He is desperate to get over the never ending pain he had been feeling since the tragic incident due to which he finds comfort in playing video games which helps him to drown his sorrows but unfortunately it turns into a serious addiction and it actually does more harm to him than doing good. The last two lines also depicts the singer's strong desire to get over the heartache and thus he wonders if crying out loud would make his agony subside. This reminds me of how just like the singer Yoosung too had desired to cry out his pain several times, but he knows that it is futile since the rest of his friends are eventually going to invalidate his feelings in some way or the other.

"Yeah we live a life

Just running in circles day and night

Yeah we live a life

Though I try to change something

I cant seem to do anything

And I have got nothing left with me"

As the lyrics mentioned above Yoosung lives a life where he is just running in circles, he wakes up, goes to school (and can't pay attention to his lessons), comes back home, plays video games for the entire remaining day, and the cycle repeats. However he tries his best to change his situation, he joins various clubs in his school, the stitching club, the barista club and many more but, he quickly ends up losing interest in them and quitting them since they barely help him to cope up with his crippling depression. Just like the lyrics mentioned above, he found nothing to permanently get rid of his heartache. The last line reminds me of the void his cousin and role model Rika had left. After Rika's absence, there was no one for him to look up to, there was no one whom he would love to impress by performing well and finally there was no one to give him the type of emotional closure which he desperately craves for.

"I feel like I became a Zombie

With an empty heart and empty head

A scarecrow without a brain inside

Since when did I end up like this oh why"

Zombie is a person's corpse which continues to haunt the earth even after the actual demise of the person. Just like a zombie, Yoosung had been dead inside. He isn't living up to his fullest like he used to under Rika's guidance before, he is just surviving for the sake of it. A scarecrow is a term which is also used for describing a person in ragged clothes. Usually a person in ragged clothes is either not able to take care of themself and/or is not bothered about taking care of themself. In Yoosung's case, its both. He plays video games most of the time barely letting himself get a wink of sleep, he also does not give himself proper meals on time and happens to survive on convenient store foods and this is all because of his crippling depression which makes him hardly care about his own well being. Since he had been dealing with depression for quite a while and it has been a pretty long time since Rika's "demise" he can't recall for how long he had been persistently melancholic.

"I became a Zombie

I walk on drifting aimlessly

Tomorrow will be no different

I live counting the time

Till I close my eyes"

Initially Yoosung aimed to be a vet due to Rika's influence for which he worked hard to earn the top position in his class during his highschool years and he even joined one of the reknowned universities in the country with full scholarship, until the sudden disappearance of his cousin from his life. After her absence he had lost all of his sense of direction and aim in his life, he was no longer motivated to do well enough to accomplish his dreams. He had stopped expecting anything different would happen to him on the next day and is waiting for everything to end. The last lines reminds me of him in the Another Story routes. There it was very obvious that he had extremely dark thoughts where he wished to put and end to his sufferings (and thats why Zen kept him under his watchful eye to prevent the younger man from doing anything dangerous).

"Yeah we live a life

Eyes wide open in the dark

This meaningless life

Though I want to just let go

Though I want to just dream on

There is nothing I can do anymore"

The line "eyes wide open in the dark" can be used in the situation both literally and metaphorically at the same time. In the literal sense it reminds me of Yoosung's messed up sleep schedule where he barely sleeps at night. In the metaphorical sense it depicts that he can't see anything ahead of himself, except darkness, his eyes are wide open to see any possible beam of hope which he could not find at that moment. His future plans are luxury for him. When he sees the other RFA members, such as Jumin, Jaehee and Zen who are successful he desires to become as succesful as them. But whenever he dreams, he has this persistent thought that he will never be as successful as them, no matter whatever he does. That tragic incident had not only left him with crippling depression but also had shattered his self esteem.

"Get it all out, wanna cry

Let go of everything

Can I cry

Give me back my tears, they have run dry"

The lines above again depicts the desparate need to get over the crippling depression which is consuming the singer like a black hole. From the previous descriptions here, it is clear that in a similar fashion, Yoosung too is desparate to get over his sufferings. This reminds me of that one time when he told that he wants to cry so hard that he would blank out. He had already cried several times while grieving over Rika, yet he isn't satisfied.

Miscellaneous

I had also made a fanart on Yoosung based on this song because I was heavily inspired by the illustrated music videos I have seen of this song

Conclusion

I had been planning to make a lyric blog which would be related to a Mystic Messenger character. I am sorry that this took a very long time to come out. The only alibi I have to justify why I took so much of time is that, I was extremely nervous about it, I wanted to write a very good blog but I was not feeling confident enough about my project and hence I was extremely nervous about writing this blog. I an very glad for having instagram user @emilytheredone help me write this blog, she helped me to ease my nervousness over writing this blog. I am very thankful to her. Therefore, please let me know if this blog has turned out to be good.

[autolysis]

The song is background music Score combined with the voice conveying story. Here is a brand new piece of the Right now story, a draft written today 8/16/19, never before heard cognitive narrative. Right now. Adventure basics and the Battle shout, the path of Defeating that which Throws your actualization into a stunlock, or rooted in the Graveyard, unable to even find the Helper to Res Portal you. The most nefarious Debuff the Final Boss can use on you that is TOTALLY FRICKIN OP broken. Title- I'm not from this world, and not long. For a year before this moment of right now, I was in the deepest suffocation I can really imagine cognitively, because of the impact of a Graveyard schedule for the 5th month. It was ceremonially Ghostlike to wander the neighborhoods of the city in the Night glow. Haunt mode. the rare times encountering someone Alive, either out in the same night or behind windows in the Time suspended homes, were a kind of terrifying, truly warped, Bad trip style, they just somehow deeply Stung me with the energy of and about Decay and Endings. One house displayed a truly creepy disgusting either mask or art piece, the first time I accidentally spotted it in the corner of that house Front room window, during my hypervigilant survey of the scene near this stop on the route, the Buzzing wave of Freefall confusion with Instinct, your preservation sense, set this scene of Putrid creep upon my Unrested mind. [[Fade to flashback, and it's not my voice, it's a smarter person, she sounds like The coffee's heat and flavor that brings you to life: We have been through a lot in a year That guy in our building who set three fires in the middle of the night in a building I mistakenly thought was wired to a smoke triggered alarm but actually was just a pull alarm leaving the people to scream and pound on Windows and make sure every single person lived including my seven year old son who was shaking as Ian carried him out of his room filling with smoke and my eighth month size baby belly sideways to reach our kittens hiding under the bed as i catch up to Ian at the car with a double kitten bundle supported by a baby belly took wide steps swiftly as I realized everything I own was going to burn and I'm so lucky that everyone alive was out and we could just replace materials but the fire fighters stormed and soaked the fire before it Crossed the wall into masses room saving our unit within inches of space After that the cats in the neighborhood stopped disappearing indicating the arsonist was also the cat slaughterer but we still lost six cats here including mases best friend which is still hard because I have so many pictures of them doing everything together and I had to lose a second cat because she kept getting out to look for puff and I refuse to let her get into the hands of the kitten killing arson Walmart white meth head Nascar hick so ham went to be with a nine year old girl and we said goodbye to her but she lived and that is what is important A month after that we had a rough c section birth where the baby was stuck awhile and a forcep was used and we have had some issues but the muffin and I are pretty much all better now but she was in the hospital to stay alive while she struggled to survive the fluid and swallowing issues the hospital still doesn't exactly understand but has something to do with how she felt after being born like that and her having opinions about swallowing based on not being well and fluid from being born but I was not going to let her be on a feeding tube for too long, it was miserable for her so I paid close attention to what she wants and was able to teach her swallowing with sugar water, like candy it was an incentive to keep trying and learn and now she drinks and eats and loves it 
Ian is on a regimen of steroids to prevent another series of ambulance ICU trips because his lungs have issues with the smoke from the fires each year but I learned how to be really pregnant and self sufficient and caring for Mase alone because Ian had to focus on not dying in the ICU 
And finally the huge move we just survived after being in that other unit five years. --]]] 1 [Title Screen Reads] There was much more to life than looking at displays and pushing buttons, Stanley concludes, at the end of the parable. (The end is the beginning). ///Fades to scenes of the sleeping neighborhoods 2 [voice without an onscreen speaker visible, only emptiness is visible] i am building an idea about the process by which you figure out your idea and your self concept. it is thinking about thinking. It is XP, Leveling up, and Customizing each actual detail of your Char. sharing it with people has the specified intent of helping them be and feel seen [Now it's me the Driver on the route, in the driver's seat, speaking to you in real time again] 3 now i am extremely mega hyped - looked forward to #wowclassic with a very gradually accumulating hope and joy predication for about the last year, I learned of it perhaps shortly after the newest Wow release, which I got maybe 3 weeks or a month after. Never had a plan to have a community, and in that time I found the best and raddest video game players and community other than my 1 best friend, and AFTER the name day happened just now, I learned that we would be launching a group from day 1. I did not include that in either the early hype or this very intense hype over the last 2 months of the beta, it's a 3rd plateau of hype unfolding to go from two dimensions to a complete 64-bit wonderland of excitement 4 [Now we are together in the room, we are finished driving in the place and time where everyone seems to be asleep] Your breath links directly to your power (mana, energy, rage ? each of us has different powers, even whilst we have similarities of character), I recently came across the fact that a bigger, slower breath can be used to buff consciousness. * So does a bigger, slower Thought. Like this year of fond forethought. You can inhale larger, after slowly taking in the air for an interval, you can pull a little bit more air in to finally hold it all. In vocal performance of all types, you also experience this because you are Lifting breath to carry Voice. But I just understood that it's a Special Ability to cast, to vocally perform or to just harness for consciousness. also the exhale with a very non rapid method, so the amount of time it takes to totally exhale is long. You spend a long time pondering something, that's the inhale. Also the same as cultivating the Set for a psychadelic experience. Your mind is brewing, repleting your Mana. The set, meaning MIND set, is the size of your Mana or Power bar. It's how much air you Lifted in order to ACTUALIZE YOUR DEEPEST TRUTH []

[ceasarslegion]

I have debilitating ADHD. It is extremely difficult for me to function when I'm off my meds, and unfortunately, I'm off my meds because my town pharmacy won't take my goddamn prescription. Luckily, I don't have to worry about work for the time being. But that doesn't mean having nothing to do is necessarily a good thing. It's a double-edged sword: imagine an overactive mind running at a million miles an hour and Demanding stimulus when you have... no stimulus to give it. You just sit there vibrating and running in place and being driven up the bloody wall while the bad part of time blindness kicks in and makes the seconds feel like hours. So what do I do?

I play video games. I play lots, and lots, of video games. It's something interesting and fun to focus on, I can shift into hyperfocus and make the time go by faster so I don't feel trapped, it satisfies my need for stimulus, gives me tasks, rewards, problems to solve, everything. Elder Scrolls lore has given me something to take joy and interest out of, and renewed other hobbies like art and writing because I wanna draw the perfect madness of the Shivering Isles and write about my character's adventures in Morrowind. It's perfect.

And I love to read, don't get me wrong. I have stacks of fantasy and sci fi books, but I implore you to try to read a novel when you're unmedicated. Brain no care if it's gonna be interesting in 5 pages, if it's not interesting now, goodbye. It fucking sucks, man. I just wanna read Trials of Apollo and Discworld, but I can't even get through one paragraph right now. It's so bad because of the lack of multi-sensory stimulus, that I was gonna order the rest of the Witcher books, but I decided against it because at this rate what's the point?

But video games really hit that for me. They're perfect for me right now. So I play them, lots and lots and lots. But... that makes me uncreative, doesn't it? I don't have a real hobby, it's just video games. Real creative types can read the books they genuinely enjoy without assistance! And honestly, playing that many games just makes me an unhealthy slob, and all that joy and accomplishment I feel from finally destroying an insanely difficult Dark Souls boss or winning a difficult interrogation scene in LA Noire is just sad, isn't it? Isn't it sad that someone jumps up and genuinely gives a little cheer of victory at something virtual?

I don't neflect my other responsibilities. It's not an addiction. And it's also not something that's inherently lesser than my hobbies that generate something. This culture of putting down certain things just because you feel superior in the number of books you've read or how many paintings you've put up on your walls in the last week is, dare I say it, shitty and harmful. I felt genuine shame for playing Heavy Rain until 2am the other night as if being so positively invested and engaged in something ultimately harmless that I lose track of the time and go "woah, holy shit" when I check the time because I coulda sworn it was 10pm 5 minutes ago is a bad thing that reflects poorly on my character.

Not to mention that if you treat such hobbies as lesser than kids don't want to engage in the ones you deem superior. It sounds paradoxical, but it's true. Like, you force a kid to stop playing games and force them into piano lessons instead, they will hate piano, hate you for putting them through that, and reinforce the thought that games are the only hobby they genuinely enjoy.

Y'all... gotta stop with this shit, man. Just... stop. Let people enjoy things. No hobby is inherently better or worse than others just because it generates something or seems more passive than others. I only got back into drawing and writing recently because gaming opened that avenue back up to me by getting rid of my crushing mental block, and those things being connected to each other is more common than you think.

I don't know, this probably reads like gibberish, but it's what I got to say on the matter.

Very cool of society to deem certain hobbies as inherently lesser than others just because of the medium they're on 😔👌