@umbrarkzoo felt like you'd wanna be tagged in this so you can see dndnndndnd ('cus I know you like these)
Anyway I felt like posting incorrect FNAF quotes again here ya go (under the cut)
may accidentally repeat a quote from a past post 'cus I've made too many to keep track of and it's been a while ok-
quotes taken from the Perchance generator, I just insert the characters in manually if I find something I can work with
One quote features my hc version of the FNAF 3 guard (maybe I'll post more about that someday I just wanted to use her for one quote).
Toy Freddy: I need a long word.
Toy Bonnie: T-rex but the long one.
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Jeremy Fitzgerald: How do you do that?
Michael Afton: I'm fearless.
Fritz Smith: I saw you run from bees yesterday. You flailed around and tripped over a chair. It was both hysterical and sad.
Michael Afton: I'm mostly fearless.
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Golden Freddy: Slash gamemode creative.
Freddy: Dude, this isn't Min-
Golden Freddy: *starts levitating*
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Funtime Freddy: Okay, two person huddle.
Bon-Bon: You can't huddle with two people. This is just a hug.
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Toy Chica: You're pathetic!
Toy Bonnie: You're pathetic-er!
The Puppet: You're both losers.
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Michael Afton: Can you name a single city in Oklahoma?
Ennard: Oklahoma City, bitch!
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Jeremy Fitzgerald: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
Fritz Smith: Okay.
Jeremy Fitzgerald: And make out during the scary parts.
Fritz Smith: Th-
Fritz Smith: The scary parts.
Fritz Smith: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
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Monty, tearing up the room: Where are they?
Monty looking under a pillow: Who moved them? Who moved my children?
Monty: Somebody moved my M&M's, and now I am going to start killing.
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Michael Afton: We've got to find a way to cut down our expenses. What can we live without?
Helpy: Lefty, probably.
(insert lawsuit joke here)
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Roxy: If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one.
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Funtime Freddy in a horrible German accent: Bill Nye is on break, I'm Bill Nein.
Michael Afton: Can I go to the bathroom?
Funtime Freddy, in the same horrible German accent: Nein!
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Roxy: Now, if I may speak for good-looking people everywhere...
Gregory: Only as their rodeo clown.
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Michael Afton: WHO THE FUCK-
Helpy: Whoa, language!
Michael Afton: I speak fucking English!
Henry Emily: ...
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Crying Child: I wanna sleep for 40 hours.
Michael Afton: You know that's called a coma, right?
Crying Child:
Crying Child: That sounds so refreshing, I could totally go for a light coma right now.
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Michael Afton: I only have 6 weeks left to live.
Jeremy Fitzgerald: Oh my god, really?!
Michael Afton: It's just a guesstimate based on the choices I've made.
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Circus Baby: You use humor to deflect your trauma.
Michael Afton: Awww, thanks-
Circus Baby: That’s not a good thing.
Michael Afton: All I’m hearing is that you think I’m funny.
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Michael Afton: Susie, you're my best friend.
FNAF 3 Guard: Best friend? BEST friend?! Bitch, I'm your only friend.
FNAF 3 Guard: I'M THE ONLY ONE CAPABLE OF TOLERATING YOUR DUMB ASS!
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Michael Afton: Hey guys, today my brother pushed me, so I'm starting a kickstarter to put him down.
Michael Afton: The benefits of killing him are that I would get pushed way less.
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Michael Afton, making coffee: This is going to fix everything.
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Daycare Attendant: Do you guys ever have a civilized conversation that doesn't require insulting each other every time you get a chance?
Roxy: No.
Gregory: No.
Daycare Attendant: Didn't think so.
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Jeremy Fitzgerald, talking about Ennard: Is this a friend of yours, Mike?
Michael Afton: Kind of? Not really. They're in my life and there's nothing I can do about it.
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Michael Afton: *trying to buy a Father's Day card at Hallmark*
Michael Afton: Excuse me, do you have any that just say "You are my dad?"
Associate: Well, I-
Michael Afton: How about "You banged my mom?"
Associate: No...
Michael Afton: You know what, I'll just get a blank one.
Michael Afton: *writes* You are a father. This is a day. Here is a card.
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Sun: Hopefully Roxanne has learned a lesson about respecting other people's feelings.
Roxy: Oh, shut up and die Sun.
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Fritz Smith: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized.
Jeremy Fitzgerald: *steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to his knees and sob while apologizing profusely*
Fritz Smith: That one. I want that one.
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Glamrock Freddy: Vanessa, is that legal?
Vanessa: When there's no cops around, anything's legal!
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Toy Chica: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism.
The Puppet: And you came to me?
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William Afton: What goes up but never comes down?
Michael Afton: The amount of stress you're bringing this family.
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Gregory: I wish I could control wasps and bees to sting my enemies.
Glamrock Freddy: You’re too young to have enemies.
Gregory: You don’t even know.
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Vanessa: Here are two pictures. one of them is your room, and the other is the garbage dump.
Monty: *points at a picture* That one is the dump.
Vanessa: tHEY'RE BOTH YOUR ROOM!
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Funtime Freddy: The time to act is now.
Funtime Freddy: Wink, wink.
Circus Baby: Don't say "wink wink". Just wink.
Funtime Freddy: Oh, sorry.
Funtime Freddy: Wink.
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Vanessa: Where are my fucking keys?
Glamrock Freddy: Officer Vanessa, Gregory is around, can you say it a little nicer?
Vanessa: May I ascertain the whereabouts of my FUCKING KEYS?!
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Gregory: Good morning. As you begin your day, remember that violence is always an option and often the answer.
Glamrock Freddy:
Gregory:
Glamrock Freddy: ...Please, go back to bed.
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Michael Afton: Hey Mr. Emily, do you have any hobbies?
Henry Emily: Swimming..
Michael Afton: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to-
Henry Emily: In a pool of self hatred and regret.
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Michael Afton: So I have made the decision to trust you.
Circus Baby: A horrible decision, really.
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Ennard: You should have realised, Eggs Benedict, if the scooper didn't kill you, we would.
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