#Tw attempted rape

[lulubelle814]

A Marriage of Convenience - Part 4

Part 5

A Marriage of Convenience Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Any trigger warnings are listed in the tags.

1 year into the fake marriage

Although today was a holiday, Loki still had to go into the office because of some big project and turned down Eva’s offer to come and help.  He’d been a bit distant the past few days, but work was also a mess.  She used this time to herself to walk to the nearby bookstore and browse their collection.  It was a unique kind of bookstore called The Reading Nook.  The store had a comfortable, homey feel that she loved.  Looking around the store, her eye caught a book with a pretty cover: The Invisible Life of Addie Larue.  Reading the description, it sounded intriguing.  A girl who makes a deal with a dark god to have her freedom with a catch: once she’s out of sight, she is no longer remembered by whomever was around.  There were other details she found interesting and decided to buy the book after reading the first few pages.

One other book caught her eye: Neil Gaiman’s Norse Mythology.  He was a favorite author of hers and thought Loki might like it, seeing as his namesake is in more than one of the stories.  Up at the register, Clark scanned the books and bagged them.  Hopefully it would at least give him a bit of a laugh.  

On the walk back home, she had an idea, something his mother had mentioned, one that might help cheer up Loki after having to work on one of his few days off.  Stopping by the store on her way home, she unbagged everything and turned on the oven to preheat.  Picking up her phone, she started one of her playlists almost at full blast (not wanting to disturb any neighbors who might be home).  Pulling out the big pot, she followed the directions his mother had given her a while back.  While the stew simmered on the stove, she started on the dessert: lemon bars.  

With the loud music, she didn’t hear the front door open, nor did she notice Loki having found her in the kitchen, leaning against the wall watching.  He pulled out his phone to take a couple of pictures quickly as well as record a short video of it; however, she saw him as he was taking the video and got her squeaking in embarrassment on video.  “You can’t sneak up on a girl like that!”  She threw a kitchen towel at him which hit him in the chest as he laughed.  “I couldn’t help myself, darling.  Are you making stew?”  Eva smiled and nodded.  “I got the recipe from your mother a couple of weeks ago.  I know you’ve been stressed with work and thought you’d like some comfort food.”

Loki couldn’t hold himself back from enveloping her in his arms.  He kissed her on the cheek before pointing to the other thing she was working on.  “Are those lemon bars?”

“They are!  I know how you like your sweets, and I found a recipe I wanted to try.”

He lightly gripped her arms, giving her a quick kiss on the mouth.  “You really are the best.”  As he went to take a closer look, her hand touched her lips, thinking about the unsolicited kiss.  Sure they’d kissed before, but it was always in public and always as part of the charade, but no one else was here.  Was he even aware of what he’d just done?

She turned to see him swiping a bit of the lemon filling on his finger to taste and lightly smacked his hand.  “Oi! Not until after they’re done you silly man.”  Loki laughed at her response, holding up his hands in defeat.  “Yes, ma’am.”  Slowly, his good mood faded, and the sound of his voice turning sour.  “I have to go on a business trip Monday.  I’ll be gone a few days.”  

“I’m sorry.”  Then she suddenly remembered.  “I got something for you.  You could take it on your trip if you’d like.”  His eyebrows scrunched.  “You didn’t have to get me anything.”  It only took a moment to remember where she’d put the book bag and pulled out the norse mythology book, handing it to him.  When he saw it, a grin spread across his face.  “I love Neil Gaiman!”  He hugged her, kissing the top of her head.  “Thank you, darling.  I can’t tell you how much I appreciate all of this.  And this book is definitely coming with me.”

She stepped back, leaning against the counter.  “How long will you be gone?”

Another sigh.  “Most of the week.  I should be back no later than Friday though.  I wish I didn’t have to go at all, but Odin isn’t feeling well.  Apparently that’s why he had me go into the office today.”

“I’m so sorry.  I hope he feels better soon.”  Eva turned back to the stove to stir the stew.  Loki came up and held her from behind.  “Yeah, but you’ve made this day so much better with all of this.  I haven’t had this stew since I was a boy.”  She held up a spoonful for him to try.  “What do you think?  Does it need more salt?”  The smile on his face said everything.  “It’s perfect.”

While she finished up and placed the lemon bars in the oven, Loki set the table, pulling out bowls and spoons.  The soup was poured into a nicer container, one that had a lid and could be put into the fridge later.

Loki was gone for a few days on a business trip.  Eva got so used to having him around that it felt lonely with him gone.  So she tried to keep herself occupied like she had before this contracted marriage: reading books, watching a bit of tv, etc, but none of it held the same joy that it had before.

Things at work continued to go well.  With Loki on the business trip, her days were less busy, and she was eager for Loki to come back, not that he felt the same way about her.  In the time they’d been cohabiting in this ruse, her deep seeded crush was turning into requited love, and she was doing what she could to squash it: going to movies by herself, running errands alone, and the like.  Distractions were good.  Distractions helped keep her mind off it.

Meanwhile, Loki was getting bored in the meetings he was forced to attend on this trip, his mind wandering back to that weekend, the soup, the sweets, and the book.  He kept looking at the pictures on his phone of her dancing in the kitchen and watching the video on mute. A small smile formed across his face as he spaced out thinking about it.  When someone asked for his comment on a matter, he pretended he was listening but didn’t understand what they’d said, asking them to clarify.

Back in the main office, Steve noticed Loki was gone for the week and used the opportunity to get closer to Eva, becoming bolder than he had before, touching her hand when purposefully going to reach for the same thing, brushing against her back in the breakroom.  The further into the week they got, the more aggressive he became.  She did everything she could to avoid being in the same room as Steve.  When Thursday came around, he made his move, finding her alone in the supply closet.  Closing and locking it behind him, he pinned her against a set of shelves by her neck.  “Get off of me!”  She tried to push him off of her, but he was stronger than he looked.  “Nah nah, baby girl.  I’ve seen how you are in the office.  You like me, admit it.”

Shaking her head, tears started to fall.  “I don’t!  I’m married to Loki.  You know this.”  She tried to show him her giant engagement/wedding ring.  Instead, he grabbed the hand, using it to help pin her.  “If you really didn’t want me, then why haven’t you reported me?”  A spin chilling grin spread across his face.  Pulling her other hand up, he held both with one hand while the other started groping her.  The dam holding her tears back burst.  “Stop!”  This time, her voice was louder, hoping someone would hear.  It didn’t stop him.  In fact, he started kissing around her face as his hand wandered further down her body.  As he reached her nether region, he fondled her folds through her underwear.  “You know you want this, baby.”  Shaking her head, she cried loudly, continuing to protest.

Downstairs, Loki arrived back early, the meetings having gone well.  He knew his wife would still be at the office and thought he’d stop in to offer her a ride home.  Not sure where she was assigned that day, he started towards his office.  While walking down one of the hallways, a terrifying sound interrupted him from his thoughts.  Someone was screaming for help.  Following the sound, it was coming from the supply closet.  Trying to open it, he found it was locked.  The screaming and crying inside continued.  Rather than demand the door be opened, he followed his instincts and kicked the door down, finding his wife being assaulted.  All he could see was red, ripping Steve away and punching him in the face.  He continued to kick him when the assaulter fell on the floor.  With the door now open, the sounds reached farther in the office, people running to see what was going on.  Two gentlemen who came had to pull Loki off of Steve before he killed him.  Another held Steve so that he couldn’t run.  Someone called the police and said they were on their way.  

Loki shrugged the two men off to check on Eva.  He moved gently so as to not scare or startle her.  “Darling, are you alright?  Did he hurt you?”  He scanned her to see any signs of injury and spotted the bruises showing up on her wrists and neck.  Just as he turned to take his rage out on her assaulter, the police arrived.  Steve was swiftly arrested, and the detectives took statements from both Loki and Eva.  Eva had a hard time trying to tell them, feeling so overwhelmed and broken that they called an ambulance for her.  Loki went with her to the hospital, holding her hand gently the entire time.

At the A&E, a female doctor was assigned to help her, to help minimize the trauma.  Loki refused to leave her side but looked away out of respect when they inspected her more delicate areas.  Thankfully there were no other injuries to be found.  Eva was given something to help her calm.  “This will help, but it will very likely make you fall asleep.”  True to their word, she was asleep a few minutes later.  They wrote a script for Xanax, advising Loki that she’ll likely need it over the next few days at least and released her to go home.  He was able to get the script filled at the hospital so that she wouldn’t be alone even for a few minutes in the car, feeling she was safer in the A&E while he got it done.

When they arrived home, she was still completely knackered from the sedative.  He didn’t want to leave her alone and laid her down in his bed rather than her own so he could be there should he have nightmares, or at least to be there whenever she woke up so she’d know she wasn’t alone.  When she awoke later that night, the first thing she saw was Loki and was flooded with relief.  Starting to cry again, he held her close, stroking her hair and telling her over and over that it’s okay, that he was right there and wouldn’t leave her alone.

From that night on, she spent more time sleeping in Loki’s bed, feeling safer with him so close, and her things slowly migrated into his room, not that he minded one bit, even making room in his closet and drawers for her.

Dividers by @jiyascepter

Taglist: @vbecker10 @eleniblue @msdjsg7 @lovingchoices14

Taglist is open!

[panimoonchild]

"He said that he would shoot me in the legs and that I had to enter his position," says a girl from Sviatohirsk, Donetsk region, about a Russian who tried to rape her

- He came to my house. He was with a bottle of cognac. He forced me to drink it. I mean, he poured cognac into my mouth and started to hit on me. I barely had time to lock him in the house and run and call for help. I was crying, running around the apartment, hiding from him. He broke my ironing boards and clothes dryers at home. He broke everything. He tried to put me on them.

- Did he have a gun?

- Yes. He said that he would shoot me in the legs and that I had to enter his position. He was completely intoxicated. He was extremely inadequate. My psyche was completely broken. As soon as a spoon falls somewhere at home, I shudder. This is the case with many people.

Video from Slidstvo_Info

Bloody russians and their obsession with raping culture.

[laugtherhyena]

Tunnel 7

Wrote a fic about Karin following Abella into the bunker after seing her leave town in a hurry. She thinks this will be the perfect opportunity to catch Abella red handed and discover if her suspicions about the Oldegårian are right, however, what she actually learns is something she wasn't expecting, nor did she ever wanted to hear.

You can read it all under the cut :)

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Abella's footsteps echoed loudly through the long empty hallways of tunnel 7, it was perfect. Even from a distance Karin could make out where she was heading and stealthily follow her trail, carefully timing her steps with the ones from the mechanic to make sure the little noise she made would be drowned out by the sound of Abella's sturdy boots against the harsh floor.

The entrance to the bunker was the first place she saw the mechanic after they left the train, and there she was again, what is it with this place? What does she want from it?

…

There was something about Abella.

Something that kept making Karin's mind circle back to her like a moth to a flame.

Abella had been nothing but kind and helpful ever since they met at the train. She volunteered to take a look at the engine to see what could have gone wrong, she was sweet and nice to everyone she talked with.. Too nice, maybe? Too good to be true…

The journalist couldn't place a finger on why, but she could swear there was something more to that attractive Oldegårian than what meets the eye.. If this whole mess really was a sick army experiment they would need to have someone on the inside to look over everything, wouldn't they? Someone their little guinea pigs found reliable and trustworthy, someone they would never doubt..

Earlier when Karin was taking photos around town to document her findings she saw Abella rush into the woods, it was an odd sight coming from someone who was usually so calm. There were no twisted villagers or monstrous creatures chasing her, she was alone, what's the rush?

Carefully following her tracks it seemed like Abella picked a route different from the common ones, as if she didn't want to be seen, it didn't seem like she was returning to the train either. Eventually the path led Karin to the entrance of a tunnel and now she finds herself carefully navigating through them, making sure to keep an eye on where Abella is heading and take mental notes of the situation.

This is it, if she's getting anything out of this woman this is the time and place. If things went awry she could always rely on her trusty gun, she could feel it from the hand in her pocket, it would take her less than a second to grab, aim it and..

But she didn't want that. She didn't want to fight Abella.. For investigative reasons of course! She can't get any info out of her if she's dead on the floor.

Abella doesn't seem like the kind to start a fight unprovoked, but if she was right about her being a spy, perhaps it's all an act..?

Who could she be affiliated with? The Bremen army was an obvious candidate, Karin could swear she saw a man in a Bremen army uniform back in the train before it all went down, the Eastern union can't be left out of the table, the NLU as well.. Those people have been awfully quiet ever since they broke one of their agents out of prison-

*CLANG-CRASH!!*

The wrench whizzed through the air like a bullet and smashed into the ground with a loud crash, it was thrown with such force that it left a crack where it first hit the floor.

She didn't even see it be launched, all Karin could catch was the shadow of the wrench flying dangerously close to her face, in the next second the noise hit her ears and the tool lay on the floor. The sudden action made Karin grip the gun hard, finger in the trigger, but still on her pocket? Why!? She can't hesitate, not after almost having her head crushed by a flying wrench! She needs to pull it and point towards-

"..Abella?"

Through all of this pursuit Karin had not actually had a good look at Abella's face, obviously, she was following her from behind. But now they stood face to face.. It felt wrong.

Abella looked visibly distraught, her eyes were wide open and her gaze seemed lost, confused, scared. Was this the face of a spy who's about to have their cover blown..?

There was a considerable distance between them yet Karin could tell Abella was shaking slightly as she breathed heavily from her mouth. The mechanic let out a long grunt as she buried her face in her large hands.. It almost looked like she was in physical pain.

"By All-mer.. I'm sorry, Karin…"

"What is wrong with you, Abella?"

Karin's strong words echoed through the silent tunnel, Abella moved her hands down in response, her face still mostly covered but the journalist could see her eyes again.

"Uhhm.."

"..T-The wrench! Did it graze you? If it did i have some cloth pieces on me, you can-"

"Do not change the subject!" Karin exclaimed as she pointed a finger towards Abella and started making her way towards her as she continued her speech.

"I ask the questions and you answer. Don't think you can fool me, I saw you leave Prehevil in a hurry and take the most obscure path to this place, and now you've been wandering aimlessly through these hallways. Something is wrong, I know it."

"So tell me what's going on." She was right in front of Abella as she finished her sentence. The Oldegårian looked at her in shock as she stumbled upon her words.

"You saw me!? Did you-.. Did you see…"

Abella looked disturbed, her gaze jumped all over the bunker before shutting her eyes. She took a series of deep breaths before straightening herself, she opened her eyes, who stared directly at Karin's.

"After I looked around town I went to check the Mayor's manor. Huge place, there's even a food storage, I told Henryk about that."

"There was a bed in one of the rooms. I was tired I.. I wasn't going to sleep for long, it was just gonna be a quick nap and then I'd go back to searching."

"..But I fell asleep.. I slept like a log…"

Abella took a pause and rubbed her face before continuing. Her gaze now fixated on her own hands.

"When I woke up, he was there. The guy in the white suit, He... H-He had his pants down and-and he-.. He was going to-!.. To-.. T-To.."

Abella's eyes watered as she struggles to utter those damned words, as if her body physically refused, far too repulsed to say it.

"I-I know… I know he wo-would!.."

She angrily tapped her feet as she finished speaking. Tears rolled down her face as Abella couldn't hold it in anymore and started crying, Karin never thought she'd see her like this.. So distressed, terrified and uncomfortable. That woman was in so much pain, yet, her sobbing was quiet. Hardly louder than a whimper.

This is not what Karin wanted to hear.

Not in a million years would she have guessed the root of Abella's turmoil was an attempted rape.

She was ready for her to admit being a part of a dangerous army, a terrorist organization, a secret society or some obscure conspiracy group even the great Karin Sauer had never heard of.

But now, there she was. Kneeling on the floor, silently weeping with her hands covering her face. Right in front of Karin.

What are you even meant to do in this situation? What are you meant to say to someone who just escaped from such a sickening form of abuse? She was used to covering wars, not comforting people!

She was furious.. Furious at that disgusting mobster, but also herself.. She shouldn't have worded things that way, she was so rude and ignorant! Sure, she didn't know the reason behind Abella's unusual behavior when she said it but still..

She felt like shit, what kind of renowned journalist mistakes a woman’s trauma for her sneaking around!

But that doesn't matter now, this isn't about her. She needs to help Abella!.. Somehow.

Karin was never good at showing physical affection, let alone comforting people. Her work field and career made her even worse at that. But she can't just leave Abella crying, she has to do something, anything will be better than just watching.

Karin crouched next to her and hesitantly reached for her shoulder with a hand, Abella flinched slightly upon the touch and looked back at the journalist.

"I-I! Nothing-.."

"Nothing actually happened! I got him away from me before!- Before he could take off my clothes.."

"B-But i.. I-I…"

Abella's breathing became more irregular as she tried to finish the sentence, her eyes avoided contact as she looked at the bunker floor stained by her fallen tear drops. That's it, no more just standing there! Karin closed her eyes and embraced Abella. She had no idea if this was a good move, maybe it would just make things worse..

Luckily for her, after a few seconds of being startled by Karin's sudden action Abella slowly hugged her back, resting her head on the journalist's shoulders, she took a moment to steady her breathing before speaking again.

"I keep thinking, you know.. If I hadn't woken up when I did. If i wasn't strong enough to kick him away.. What would have happened to me… Where would I even be now…"

A few more tears rolled down her eyes as she tightened her embrace, She was tense, Karin could tell. Her muscles were far from relaxed, if anything they looked kinda swollen..? Her skin had an odd look as well, but Karin's just going to assume that's the poorly lit tunnel's doing.

"Abella, I'm so sorry you had to go through this. It's not something anyone should ever have to experience, let alone someone like you."

"You smile and lend a hand to everyone you come across, regardless of how long you know them for.. Only a true monster would even think of hurting you this way."

"It's over now. He's not here, you're safe. And I am here with you, I won't leave until I know you're well again."

Afterwards, the journalist tightened her embrace. She could feel Abella's body shake slightly as she let a couple more tears roll down her cheeks.

The two women stayed like that for the next couple minutes, not a single word was uttered between them during this time, they simply held each other. A tight yet gentle embrace.

Karin thought about the last words she told Abella, were they good enough? Or should she have worded anything differently? Maybe she should have said more. She thought about other things to say but none of them felt right, staying quiet didn't feel right for her either.. She felt like what she did wasn't enough, that she should comfort her in a better way, even if she had no idea what that way was.

But perhaps it was enough. Overtime Abella's breathing returned to normal and her crying had stopped, her muscles seemed to become less tense as well. Karin felt so relieved, perhaps now was the right time to open her mouth again.

She was unsure if now was the right place to ask this, but she needed to know, not only for Abella's safety but for everyone else from the train..!

"Abella, do you know where he could be? Did you see where he ran off to?"

If this man was still in town they couldn't just leave him free to wander around, they had to capture him, tie him up with a rope or chain and leave him to rot somewhere far away from everyone until they could contact the authorities. That was the right thing to do, but not what Karin wanted to do.

She wanted to put a bullet through his skull. She wanted to keep shooting his disgusting face over and over until it was nothing but a mangled mess of bloody bullet holes. She wanted to-

"In the sewer."

"Huh?" The mechanic's words took Karin by surprise, as they pulled away from their long hug Karin took a good look at her face. She no longer looked distraught just.. Utterly exhausted, which is expected after all this. Her eyebags looked more prominent and her eyes were devoid of any shine.

"The sewer. I threw his body in the sewer."

"Oh.. I see."

"Look. Karin, i didn't-"

"No, no." Karin held Abella's hands as she looked into her eyes. "You don't have to explain yourself. You were in danger, and defended yourself accordingly. Don't ever think of you as some heartless murderer."

"..Alright." Abella replied with a tired smile on her face as she intertwined her fingers with Karin's, it made her blush a little, as much as she didn't want to admit it. It was strange, Abella's hands were big, bulky and calloused, yet her grip was nothing but gentle.

"So, you didn't see me hide the body..? I thought that's why you were after me."

"No I didn't, you were already on your own when I spotted you."

Karin paused, there was something else she needed to say to Abella.

"I'm sorry, about me, I shouldn't have been so harsh with you earlier."

"It's fine. You didn't know.."

After that, the room fell quiet, it was awkward. Karin quickly took upon herself to break the silence.

"Well, I think we should be going. You're in no condition to be running around a bunker."

Abella simply nodded in response. The two women got up from the dusty floor hand in hand, and remained that way as they left tunnel 7.

_________________________

Hours later Karin found herself in the secret hideout underneath Prehevil bop. She brought Abella to the pub so that she could have some water and eat something before resting, she had no idea when was the last time she had eaten or drank anything. There were others at the bar, some had worried looks and asked what had happened, to which Karin simply said she found Abella unwell and couldn't just leave her be.

It wasn't in her place to disclose what had happened, that's something Abella should decide if and when she wants to share it once she's better.

At last, Karin had time to organize her thoughts and theories about the situation they were all currently in, the Termina festival. The day hadn't been nearly as productive as she initially intended, but she wasn't mad, helping Abella was.. Important as well, it made her happy to know she was ok now.

The hideout was an interesting place, it clearly belonged to some kind of organization, the NLU most likely. It had an area in one of it's corners that reminded Karin a bit of her own workspace back at the Midnight gazette, it had a decently sized table with a nice comfortable armchair, there was even a board on the back which she could use to lay out her photos and organize things in a presentable way.

But she wasn't there. Instead, Karin sat on the cold wooden floor quietly documenting her findings in a notebook supported by her legs folded in fetal position. She was sitting right next to the hideout's bunk beds, specifically the one which Abella was sleeping in.

She could see the armchair and table from the corner of her eye, yet she didn't want to go there even if it was the more comfortable option. She wanted to stay close to Abella, make sure she's safe in her peaceful slumber, she said she'd stay by her side after all!

…

Karin looked at the sleeping Oldegårian, she had a sweet little smile on her face, the sight made the journalist's heart flutter. For the first time today Abella looked genuinely calm and relaxed, perhaps a little too relaxed, one of her arms was hanging over the edge of the bed, touching the floor… It would be cruel to leave her like this.

She gently moved Abella's arm back on the bed. She didn't want to disturb her, not now when she was finally getting some good sleep. Abella moved slightly after the touch but remained asleep.

Karin found herself staring at Abella's long red hair.. It was beautiful, luscious and tied with a cute little ribbon near the end. So soft too, it was-.. Wait!

"...Huhm..?" The motion of the woman stroking Abella's hair awakened the Oldegårian. Her sleepy eyes looked at Karin, who still had a hand on the top of her head! She swiftly removed it but the movement was so awkward it looked almost robotic, her arm now loomed over Abella's head as she avoided looking at her eyes completely, the one look she gave her upon opening them was already enough to make the journalist's face red.

"U-Umm.. Do you mind..?"

"Ehehe, it's alright. It feels good." Abella replied, before closing her eyes again. Her words made Karin's heart skip a beat and caused a shy smile to appear on her face as she placed her hand back on Abella's hair.

And there she stayed, tenderly caressing Abella's hair as she fell asleep once more.

How nice.

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[boop-le-snoot]

sooo... a rapist is dead from an overdose 😌

back when I lived in a group home/orphanage, I was about ~15, there was a guy who was a couple years older, long story short he tried to r-word me and I beat him really bad (even got a cool scar out of it myself). he was in the hospital with tbi for a few weeks, along with multiple broken bones 😌

it's been about 10 years since that and he was in and out of jail all this time, for various offenses, including sa. I just got the news he's dead 😌 he died covered in his own piss and shit, from an apparent polydrug overdose 😌

I'm getting a beer! 😍 Hopefully my actual rapist follows suit quickly.

[chxrryrose]

mason greenwood to be charged, fucking good riddance

[colacat53]

my ideal fantasy for a Clockmare relationship development

Trigger Warning for mentions of attempted rape and gender dysphoria

alright I hope that's enough space between the trigger warning because I'm going to immediately say that this is all caused because of some creepy dude trying to rape Halara with their chest being groped and since I headcanon that Halara was born a hermaphrodite and that they have boobs but they just wear a binder because of reasons I will explain later but anyways the man ends up feeling their boobs which gives them a lot of gender dysphoria and they end up getting away and end up crying in their hotel room

and now we're talking about Fubuki who was for some reason(I haven't decided yet) looking for Halara and after asking Vivia and Desuhiko she goes to their room because I like to imagine that everyone staying at the hotel each has a spare key to each other's rooms in case of emergencies and she forgets to knock on the door before entering and she finds them crying and so Fubuki asks what happened and Halara is breaking down and opening up about the fact that they didn't get top surgery was because they felt that if in the future they did want to present as female not having top surgery would make that easier so they instead just wore a binder and so they're just breaking down as Fubuki holds and comforts them and Halara ends up falling asleep while Fubuki was holding them and Fubuki tries to leave after they fell asleep but the second Fubuki starts moving Halara clings to her tightly while they're asleep and so Fubuki just decides to stay with them and ends up falling asleep with them

and then later when Halara wakes up they notice Fubuki sleeping with them and finds that they didn't really mind it since she comforted them and that they even started to like her a bit

so in conclusion Halara fell first

also I just realized that it may be a little confusing so I'm just going to say that Fubuki didn't leave because even when asleep Halara didn't want her to leave which is why they started clinging tightly so she decided to stay with them until they were comfortable enough for her to leave

[timesnewreader]

I don’t read a lot of stuff rated T or High School AUs anymore because I’m 23 and I’m a heathen, but this one has got me hooked. It’s really fun story, and I actually like that Aemond is a bit of an asshole for a while, like true to his character and he has an arc which I like. It’s very sweet and is leaning towards fixit now which is also fun👍👍 (Tw there is an attempted assault in Chapter 2)

[hidinginawell]

One thing about the NYPD is that they'll be as useful and respectful as an essential oil at a funeral when they get called bc a guy climbs several stories up my fire escape to break in my window at midnight and proceeds to ask me invasive personal questions when I wake up and pull out a knife, but you can bet your ass they'll arrest the churro ladies every time they catch them selling churros and water and gum in the subway stations. Infuriating.

[2chopsticks2eyes]

Numb

(Part Two)

This is part two of a multiple part series, please be sure to start from part one!

(Part One) | (Part Two)

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

Pairing: Lee Minho/Lee Know x Fem Reader

Themes: Angst, (Smut), (Fluff)

Word Count (all parts): ~21.8k | AO3

Summary: You were penniless and working tirelessly at a seedy club when you were assaulted. As soon as you resigned yourself to your fate, Lee Minho saved you, albeit grudgingly. You received treatment and you didn’t have to pay them a dime under one condition: You must be confined to his home for the remainder of your recovery.

Author’s Note:

***IMPORTANT!!!*** THIS STORY IS FILLED WITH TRIGGER WARNINGS. THIS SECOND PART DOES NOT CONTAIN THOSE TRIGGERS, BUT IT IS IMPLIED AND REFERENCED. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE READ TAGS AND WARNINGS AT BEGINNING OF PART ONE BEFORE PROCEEDING.

The overall plot line was based off a recommendation from @linoots from Tumblr (I received permission from them to write this type of content)

(I’ve missed you all dearly. So sorry it’s taken so long 🥺)

__________________________________________

You silently watched as the doctor removed the IV that had been pumping fluids into your body for the past 48 hours and you rubbed the uncomfortable bandage he replaced it with.

You refused to make eye contact with him. In fact, you did not look or talk to anybody since you woke up in that same home-hospital room you had grown accustomed to. Not Chris, not Felix, and definitely not Minho.

You were a shell of your former self and you didn’t know if you were upset or relieved that you were revived. You didn’t know what to make of it. But now, there was one emotion you knew that burned brighter than your numbness.

Anger.

You couldn’t quite believe Felix’s words when he said that Minho was the one who came to your rescue… again…

But that was preposterous. The bastard probably told the younger man to say that to make himself look better… Whatever, fuck it all.

You allowed yourself to be led back to your room to get some rest. However, when Felix left and Minho walked in, you fortified your walls even further. You felt your face turn sour with each passing moment without even looking at the man and you rolled over in bed so your back was facing him.

There was a long pause of silence that seemed to drag on for hours.

You finally heard a long sigh and then the sound of him plopping down into the chair by your bed. “You know…” He started, and you squeezed your eyes shut. “There’s a reason I bothered to do all of this...”

You tried your hardest to ignore him, but you couldn’t control the fact that his words piqued your interest, your ears already tuned-in to his velvety voice.

“Not just this time, but… the reason I brought you here in the first place.” After a moment of silence, he realized you weren’t going to respond, so he huffed in frustration. “Forget it.”

You suddenly heard the door open and you peered over your shoulder. Without turning to face you, he blankly said, “You are now required to have 24/7 supervision, congratulations.”

And with that, the man walked out while Felix walked in, a meek smile on his face and hands full with baked goods.

“In the mood for cookies?” You sighed and just returned to your side as you balled up in a mess of frustration and confusion under the covers, mind still tingling with the thought of what Minho was going to say.

__________________________________________

“I don’t need a fucking babysitter, Felix. I’m a grown woman.”

Felix just huffed, obviously sick and tired of your complaints. “You know why it’s this way, sweetie. Don’t blame me for doing my job.”

The topic was a constant now. He was obviously there for your physical therapy, but he was also everywhere else. You loved the man, you did, but there is only so much time you could stand without a little alone time!

You wanted to watch TV? He was there. You wanted to nap? He was there. You couldn’t even go to the bathroom without having to leave the door open so he ‘has access to you at all times’. Thank god he stayed outside while you did your business…

After a week of this bullshit, you decided to do something about it…

Throughout your exploration of the house, you found some rooms with names on them. Evidently the ones that Minho once said were strictly prohibited. A couple of the rooms had names you were completely unfamiliar with, but others, you remembered well. Chan, Felix, Jisung, Seungmin, Jeongin, and finally some large double-doors with the initials L.M.

Lee Minho.

The man had supposedly been ‘out on business’ the entire week, but you knew for sure he had come back today with all of the ruckus of the house staff.

So, when you were positive that Felix had finally passed out on the sofa in your room for the night, you, as quietly as humanly possible, snuck out of the room and tip-toed down the hallway and downstairs to the doors you knew by heart now.

The room was surprisingly extremely secluded and you thanked the heavens because you knew for sure you wouldn’t be able to keep cool once he was in sight. You were fully prepared to bang your fist all the way through Minho’s door to meet the man himself if that’s what it took, but as you raised your fist to knock, the door suddenly opened.

Well… shit…

You really didn’t want to admit it, you really didn’t, but… the sight before you was absolutely, without a doubt, mouth watering. He looked just as surprised as you, but you found yourself focused on something other than his face for once…

The man was completely shirtless, pajama pants riding low on his hips and revealing the prominent V of his abdomen. Speaking of abdomen, the dude was of course ripped. Well, maybe not Dr. Chris (Or Christopher, or Chan, or what the fuck ever you want to call him) kind of ripped, but enough to make your eyes bulge out and glue themselves to every inch of impeccably toned abs and pecs.

And another thing that stood out in particular was the sleeve of tattoos twisting and swirling around the upper half of his right arm. You had only seen him in button-ups thus far and, even if he rolled up his sleeves, you somehow hadn’t ever noticed it. You were usually hyper-focused on his face, but at that moment, all you could see was the vast amount of skin on display.

You swallowed the lump in your throat.

“What are you doing here?” His stern words snapped you back to reality and you had to rapidly blink to regain a semblance of consciousness.

What am I doing? You shivered and grimaced at yourself for your intrusive thoughts before meeting his eyes.

“Uh-uhh I–” You halted your words when you noticed he was clutching something on his side. Curiosity got the better of you and you peered around his towering frame to see a soiled and basically useless bandage dripping with blood. “Holy shit! Are you alright?!” You said stepping towards him instinctively, catching yourself once he tensed and stepped back, correcting his posture as if to defend himself.

Psh, what could you possibly do to him? You couldn’t even defend yourself…

He glanced at the cloth he was currently pressing to his side and made a disgruntled noise. “I’m fine.” He said with a curt and slightly annoyed huff. “Why don’t you have anyone watching you right now?” He grumbled, obviously frustrated as he looked around behind you in search of your babysitter.

You furrowed your brows, still peeved but also worried about the still-bleeding wound on his side. “I had to sneak away because I don’t necessarily appreciate being babysat like a fucking child! Now you need to refresh that bandage before it gets infected!” You borderline shouted.

You could almost feel the daggers he shot at you with his eyes pierce through your flesh. “I said I’m fine! Now go back to be– Hey!”

You cut his sentence off short when you saw a first aid kit that looked like it had been through war and back on a small table behind him before you marched your way in, not giving two flying fucks that you were invading his room. “Get your ass in here, we need to clean you up first.” You demanded, collecting the kit and marching into what looked like the ensuite, completely ignoring his protests.

Jesus, is this much luxury even necessary? You thought as you passed through his behemoth of a room. Gray, white, and covered in smooth marble and chandeliers, it housed all of the amenities to be considered its own wing of the house. The gray material of the sofa and bed looked so soft and luxurious you were tempted to walk over and run your fingers along them. But that would have to wait.

He slammed his bedroom door shut with a huff and turned around. “You can’t just–!” You ignored him as you strolled into the bathroom (Still unnecessarily gorgeous).

“Just get your ass in here and sit!” You shouted from the bathroom. When you saw him stop in the doorway and glare at you, you just proceeded to open the first-aid kit and then pointed at the black and white marble countertop next to the sink. “Sit.”

He rolled his eyes before squeezing them shut and breathing out a slow sigh. “You… You’re a pain in my ass.” He groaned before dragging his feet over to you and hopping up to sit on the counter like you asked. If you hadn’t been right in front of him, you would have almost missed the slight hiss of pain he breathed through clenched teeth.

Why you had felt a pang of sympathy for the man, you had no clue.

He watched you apprehensively as you washed your hands and moved to face him. A brief moment of awkward silence had permeated the air before you tentatively raised your hands to remove the soiled bandage.

Minho visibly stiffened, but he made no move to stop you as your shaky fingers slowly peeled back the gauze.

Holy shit. That was 100% unmistakably a bullet wound.

Your mind was automatically transported back to that first night where you witnessed this guy casually gun down those men, effectively splattering five different brains on the fresh snow without even batting an eyelash. Who the fuck is Lee Minho? And what all was he capable of?

“If you’re going to just stand there and stare, then kindly leave me the fuck alone.” His gruff voice made you jump slightly as you were pulled from your thoughts.

You cleared your throat as you proceeded to throw away the red-stained dressing. You avoided his eyes as you grabbed the saline solution and a towel, still feeling his eyes bore into you with every movement.

However, you froze as you held the saline up to the mangled skin. “U-um… Did you take out—?”

“Yes, I already removed the bullet. Get on with it.”

Your stomach churned at his affirmation of the cause of injury, but you were getting sick and tired of his assholery as you glared up at his blackened eyes. “You know, a little gratitude goes a long way, shithead.”

He seemed stunned for a moment, looking at you as if you had gone crazy before returning to his deadly glower. “Look here, Tinkerbell—“ You bristled at that stupid-ass name again… “YOU’RE the one that barged in here. YOU’RE the one who has been a pain in my ass ever since you got here. So, no, I won’t give ‘gratitude’ where it’s not deserved. Plus, you’re the one to talk…” He murmured the last bit, but you still clearly heard him.

“Then why bother saving me in the first place?!” You basically screamed at him.

Silence and a shocked disposition was all you got in return.

“I had nothing to live for anyway, so why bother?! You could have just as easily ignored what was happening and went on your merry fucking way. Could have left me behind that dumpster to freeze and bleed to death so you wouldn’t have to deal with this ‘pain in the ass’. Could have also left me alone to OD and suffocate on my own vomit the other day. So what gives?” You finished with a seething remark while gesturing to yourself.

His face was stark blank. “You want to know why I saved you?” He said through gritted teeth. You just responded with a curt nod. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration before his expression morphed into something more solemn. It seemed like he was having an internal battle before he began to speak. He finally sighed and leaned his head back against the wall mirror with closed eyes. “I once… I had a cousin, one that was very close to me. I would always be overbearing and protective and she would always tell me to stop babying her.”

He chuckled fondly as he reminisced and you found yourself latching onto his every word. You chalked it up to the fact that you were finally learning something about this enigmatic man and this whole fucked up situation.

“Anyway, as we got older and I got busier, I began giving her more space. She was becoming a woman and I accepted the fact that she could begin to take care of herself.” He paused, but considering the faintest waver in his voice and his dry swallow, it didn’t sound like it was because he was waiting for a response… “I thought she was safe… but there were… others… vile pigs that knew how close she was to me…”

Another beat of silence and you watched his face slowly morph from sorrow to unbridled rage.

“I found her in almost the exact way I found you…” His words felt like a punch to the gut and painful images flooded your mind as you swallowed the bile that rose to your chest. “But, in her case, the scum that had… done that to her had already fled and I… I couldn’t save—” He squeezed his eyes tighter and his jaw clenched hard around the emotions before they could spill out.

You both knew he didn’t need to finish that sentence.

You felt the numbness that had taken over your soul begin to crack once again at the feeling of sympathy towards his cousin, and that shit scared you like none other.

“So, yeah. You might be a raging bitch and I might be a pretentious motherfucker. But even so, I couldn’t just leave you… I just couldn’t…” You felt something churn in your gut and you furrowed your brows in frustration as to what it was. You watched him take a deep breath and sit up a bit straighter. “So, with that being said, I can’t just allow you to throw away everything you’ve worked for so far.”

As if indicating that he had enough of the back-and-forth, he attempted to grab the saline bottle from your hand, only to be met with adamant resistance. You gently pushed his hand away (thankfully without any struggle) and brought the saline and towel up to his ever-bleeding wound that was dripping down to the puddle it created, causing a concerning amount of deep crimson to flood the marble countertop.

You silently flushed the deep cavern with the solution until you deemed it was properly cleaned before moving on to the peroxide. “This might sting a bit…” You warned as you watched his jaw clench. He closed his eyes as you disinfected it and you wondered how he could keep so cool after having a bullet plunged into his side.

Once he was properly cleaned and covered in antibiotic ointment, you picked up the gauze and searched for some tape. Your eyes widened as he wordlessly moved to hand you a long compression wrap.

You emitted a noise that sounded somewhat like a sputtering engine and your face flushed as you saw his suppressed smirk. To wrap that thing around him, you would have to run your hands all over his muscled torso… fuck.

“Something the matter?” He lilted in that nonchalant, annoying timbre. Teasing. “If you don–”

“It’s fine!” You cut him off, maybe a bit too loudly as you refused to make eye contact. “It’s just… just… don’t you have any dressing tape?” You said as you coincidentally eyed his well-defined pecs and abs.

He shrugged. “Nope. Not with me anyway. I just have this—“ He said while waving the fabric in front of your face again with a challenging brow lifted.

You nervously chuckled and squeaked out, “O-okay… Stand up…” You instantly felt goosebumps rise all over your flesh as he hopped off the counter, keeping the gauze pressed to his wound, and stepped a bit too close for a man you barely even knew. Deep breaths, you can do this…

“Hey…” You slowly raised your eyes to meet his own at the sound of the softer change in his tone. He took the tiniest step back to make it easier for him to look you in the eyes. “If you're uncomfortable… I mean… I’m not…” You don’t think you had ever seen him struggle so much with his words. He sighed and closed his eyes before sadly looking at you again. “You have nothing to be afraid of with me… I wouldn’t even think of…” He huffed and shook his head in disgust as he seemed to be thinking of the exact same thing that had plagued you day and night since arriving here.

Before he could even drive his point home, you gently laid your hand on his shoulder, causing his gaze to return to you. “I know…” You replied. “You hardly scare me, Lee Minho.” You teased with a wry smile that even surprised you.

His disturbed face was slowly replaced with a pleasantly surprised grin similar to your own. You watched with feigned mockery as he raised the wrapping once again. “Then prove it, Tink.” You just scoffed and rolled your eyes at the shortened version of his unrelenting name for you and snatched the elastic cloth from his hand.

“Fine.” You huffed defiantly before looking at his abdomen once again. You tentatively pressed the end of the wrap against his heated skin that made you blush. You could feel him watching you and you suddenly felt like hiding.

You wrapped the bandage over several times, feeling yourself tense up every time you touched his bare skin, and secured it tightly once you were finished. “O—“ Your voice cracked when you tried to speak and your face heated as you cleared your throat. “Okay, you’re finished…”

You wouldn’t look him in the eyes, how could you after you basically forced him to let you run your hands all over his tan, muscular, and absolutely gorgeous skin?

“W—“ He hesitated and, despite yourself, you found your eyes instinctively seeking his own out to somehow read the words through his dark irises. You found he was searching your eyes as well with pursed lips before he looked away and cleared his throat as well. “Thank you.”

Huh?

“Channie-hyung wasn’t available when I returned home so I tried to take care of it myself. I guess my half-assed effort didn’t do much, huh?” He chuckled and looked back at you with a meek smile.

Who the fuck is this man and where did Lee Minho go?

He nervously chuckled and you realized you’d been staring at the man far too long. You took a deep breath and stepped back. “Well, I kind of owed it to you now, didn’t I?” You said it lightheartedly, but he furrowed his brows.

“You don’t ever have to owe me anything.”

You arched a brow, but he just turned and began packing away the first aid kit again. You watched his back, trying to remember why you came to his room in the first place. “Minho?”

He stilled his movements.

“What do you even do?” He turned and arched a brow at you and you rolled your eyes, stepping forward next to him to lean against the counter. “Like, you are obviously loaded…” You said gesturing to your luxurious surroundings. “You have a full staff with a doctor to patch up nasty bullet holes like this and god knows what else…” You both looked at his bandage. “And not to mention the bullets you cleared through those guys’ heads without even blinking an eye that night…”

He bit his lip and you followed the action with your eyes. You instinctively wet your own lips. After he was done staring at the marble countertop for an unnecessarily lengthy amount of time, he hesitantly turned his body to face you.

“You could say I sort of run something like a… secret organization?” He said tentatively like it was a question unto himself and you furrowed your brows.

You squinted skeptically at him. “So… you're telling me—“ Is that worry on his face? “—that you're a secret agent? Like a spy?” You looked at him in disbelief.

He sputtered a restrained laugh and looked at you with a suppressed smile. “I suppose you could say I’m like a spy.”

“LIKE a spy?”

He looked up like he was deliberating. “Sure. Like a spy.”

“But not actually a spy?”

He groaned at your questioning and ran a hand through his messy hair. Come to think of it, this is the most dressed-down look you’d seen on him. Gone were the button-ups and slacks, now replaced by sweats and a compression wrap over his shirtless body.

He stood straight and crossed his arms, obviously ready for the conversation to be over. “Does it matter? Look, it’s already really late and Yongbok will panic if he realizes you ran off.”

Oh shit, that’s right. That’s the whole reason you were even there. In Minho’s bathroom. Standing closely to him. With the man half naked and you in your flimsy, silk nightwear. Your peaked nipples seemed suddenly way more apparent as you crossed your arms over your chest. You rapidly blinked as if suddenly waking up and quickly stepped back.

“I-I wanted to ask you something…” He arched his brow and you continued. “Can you please call off the reinforcements? I know I made a bad decision and all, but I will honestly go crazy if I have to use the bathroom with the door open one more time.” You found yourself begging rather than demanding like you had initially intended.

Why, though?

He looked hesitant and you quickly added, “I don’t even mean all of the time! Like, I’ll keep my bedroom door open so he can check up on me and he can even watch me secretly while I’m around the house, I just want at least a little sense of privacy!”

You knew you sounded like a pathetic child, but you had resigned yourself to that fate as soon as you had to take a massive, violent shit earlier that day and you knew Felix had heard everything from the other room. Without any doors to create that sweet, sweet sound barrier? Ugh… You were still mortified to look at him.

You silently watched him with imploring eyes as he tiredly rubbed his brow. “You…” You widened your eyes with a hopeful energy pulsing through them, hoping to portray as such as he looked into your pleading eyes. He sighed. “I suppose those terms are fair…” You lit up like a Christmas tree before he raised a finger. “BUT, if you are EVER alone ANYWHERE, you need to let him know where you are and give him regular updates on your whereabouts to let him know if you are okay. Okay?”

You vehemently nodded your head and perked up. “Thank GOD!”

He smirked and crossed his arms again. “I think I like you calling me a god. Have I upgraded from a narcissistic asshole?” He tilted his head with raised brows and you were, once again, reminded how gorgeous this man really was.

You rolled your eyes and went to shove his shoulder, but before you could even touch him, he grabbed your wrist in the blink of an eye. For some reason, you both looked surprised as he froze with your wrist in his hand from less than a foot away. Your heart was racing and you chalked it up to being from fear of someone grabbing you.

But why did that conclusion not feel quite right…?

Before you could ponder it, he dropped your arm and quickly stepped away. “Fuck. I-I’m sorry.” He shook his head and you watched worry swirl in his eyes.

No…

No, you weren’t afraid of this man. You don’t know why, but you knew he wouldn’t hurt you intentionally. Even after everything… “It was just instinct! I swear! I would never intend to—“

“I know, Minho.” You cut off his panicking, but his brows gave away his lingering concern. “I guess I’m just going to have to take your word for it on the whole spy thing, though, because those were super fast reflexes.” You chuckled to ease the tension and his face softened slightly.

It was silent for a moment and he cleared his throat again. “Well, I should walk you back to your room, it’s late and I’ve had… a very long few days.”

You took a large breath and promptly left the bathroom. “I’m perfectly fine on my own, you know?” There’s that twinge of irritation again…

”I know, I know. But if Yongbok is awake, I want to be able to ease his worries and update him on his role in taking care of you.

Taking care of…

Not treating, not monitoring. Taking care of. You supposed that’s what they were doing, huh? Felix was, in fact, doing much more than treating or monitoring. He waited on you hand and foot and you were being a bitch about it. You made a promise to yourself right then and there to let him know as soon as possible how much you appreciated his care and apologize for your behavior.

You nodded, both to yourself and to Minho’s reasoning before making your way back to your room with the mysterious and intriguing man just a few steps behind you.

__________________________________________

Felix was a saint. Not only did he forgive you when you apologized, but he went as far to say it was his fault for being overbearing. Which was obviously preposterous.

With your new parameters in effect, Felix decided to leave the estate shortly, before quickly returning with gifts for you. Among them were several jigsaw puzzles and you perked up at the sight of them. Over time, you had come to really appreciate those puzzles. So much so that you had already finished all of the ones currently at the estate, strangely enough. All kinds of different collections displayed on random tables throughout the mansion.

Felix was true to his word and gave you your space, only briefly giving you regular check-ups as you sat in one of the many living rooms that giant freaking place held and began the therapeutic work of putting together an adorable puzzle of a litter of kittens.

You would love to have cats…

When a sudden ruckus erupted down the hall, you furrowed your brows and looked behind you to the source. Down the corridor you saw the same seven men that you had seen regularly around the house (obviously minus Felix) dressed in what looked like active-wear gathering around the front entryway.

The men never approached you, but that was most likely because you tried to make yourself scarce once you saw one of them. Maybe Dr. Chris, Felix, and Minho you trusted, but you didn’t know those other men and it made you sick to your stomach thinking of being alone with a stranger without one of those three men accompanying you.

”Okay, guys, this is just routine training today, so no fire hazards, alright Hyunjin?” You heard Minho announce to the group.

Training? Like their super-secret-spy type training?

You felt yourself stand and march over to them without even formulating what you were doing. Who needs rational thought anyway?

If you were remembering correctly, the one named Jeongin spotted you first with a look of surprise. “Come. On. Hyuuung. We need to be prepared for anyth—“ Jeongin harshly elbowed the one who you assumed was Hyunjin and quickly spoke up.

’Hy-Mr. Lee, sir. I think someone is here for you…” He nodded a bow to you and you returned it, giving a meek smile to the group before meeting Minho’s gaze.

He looked slightly surprised before giving you… was that a smile? No, surely not…

You cleared your throat as Felix made his way over with hurried steps and a worried expression. You, then, glanced over at the other men who had become quiet as death upon you stepping up next to Minho. You scanned over them before slightly bowing. “Um… Good morning…” You introduced yourself before hearing a small ‘oh’ from the man beside you. You turned your head as he stepped forward and turned to face you again.

”I guess I haven’t really introduced them all to you yet… These are my… This is my inner circle.” He hesitated and turned to gesture to each of them. “Some I’m sure you already know. Like Channie-Hyung, Yongbok, and Jisung.” The three nodded politely with soft smiles. “But to formally introduce you to the others, this is Changbin…” The shorter, muscular man offered a shy smile. “Hyunjin…” Your eyebrows raise at the incredibly handsome man as his full lips formed a smile as well. “Seungmin…”

”Nice to formally meet you.” He said with an amused grin and you nervously chuckled as you informed him likewise.

”Then there’s our maknae, Jeonginnie.” Hyunjin cooed at the youngest when he also gave a shy smile and he received a death-glare in return.

All of the men remained incredibly polite, bowing their heads when introduced and maintaining their distance. Shit, they probably already know everything about you and your situation… especially considering the fact that no one asked you who you were or why you were there.

You guessed you understood and you were actually somewhat grateful. It saved you from having to explain it yourself and relive all of the pain again…

”It’s very nice to meet you all.” You gave the men a polite smile before turning to Minho again. You were on a mission. “Minho, can I please come train with you guys?”

You could hear a pin drop with how silent the room got. “You… you want to train?” You gave a determined nod before slumping your shoulders at his shake of the head. “No. No way.”

“What?! Why?!”

”Um, I think it’s best we head out first. We will meet you there sir.” The youngest quickly relayed before walking out the front door with the other men in tow, Felix quickly retreating to some other corner of the estate.

After watching the mass leave, you fixed your glare on Minho’s resolute expression. “Not only are you not employed by me, but you also have an injured arm—“

”It could be good therapy for me! And I can even raise it horizontally now!” You demonstrated the movement with gritted teeth, trying to hide the pain, and he responded with an unimpressed visage.

“You are already receiving therapy and you would just be a liability. So, no. End of discussion.”

A liability? Ouch.

You felt anger rise up in you and you took a step near him, his features remaining stone-cold. “You… You’re a… ugh!” You couldn’t even muster up the will to call him an asshole anymore. What the fuck was WRONG with you?

With the lack of anything better to say, you furiously stomped away up to your bedroom to fume in private, but not without flipping him off the entire way there.

__________________________________________

“Knock knock, love.” Felix announced before stepping through your open doorway. It hadn’t been long since you petulantly curled up on the plush armchair by your window to angrily watch the rain outside.

Of course it would rain. Apparently fate had decided to mock you as if you were an actress in some sort of sad music video. Surely Felix would agree.

You watched with hesitancy as he held out his hand to you. “Follow me.” He said calmly with a smile. “I want to show you a new room.” You perked up at that notion. You had been running out of places to explore recently and the prospect of seeing something new was like a kid going to a playground.

You took his hand and allowed him to lead you to one of the many locked double-doors on the estate. What you saw made you gasp in awe. Bookshelves upon bookshelves lined the walls of a massive, two-storied library that was stocked to max capacity with what looked like brand new books as well as older than hell pieces of literature. All surrounding a cozy living area with couches, armchairs, and even a fireplace.

”Minho-hyung must really trust you to let me show you this. These books mean a great deal to him and many of them are extremely fragile as well.” He trusts me? You thought as you watched Felix’s eyes widen. “I-I mean Mr. Lee…”

You furrowed your brows and turned to him. “Why do you do that?” You asked and he just blinked at you with worry written on his features.

”D-do what?”

Playing dumb, are we? “That! Those other guys do it too! Why don’t you just call him Hyung? You all are obviously close. Why try to hide it?”

Felix nervously rubbed the side of his neck and looked down. “It’s not like we are trying to hide it, necessarily. We are just trained to remain professional. It’s just much harder when we are all home and much more relaxed.”

You nodded your head in understanding. “But why do you try to hide it with me? I’m not exactly here on business.” You arched your brow and he smiled sweetly.

”It…” He seemed hesitant to speak until he sighed and lowered his head. “If we keep things professional with you, it might be easier when we have to see you go…” You were taken aback. Easier? Is he saying they would miss you? Why? You were a nobody, and you were honestly kind of a bitch. No, that can’t be it.

”What do you mean by easier?”

He seemed confused by your question. “When you spend so much time with someone, it’s easy to get attached. Even the coldest heart can find warmth in someone they find trustworthy and important.”

Trustworthy? Important? You? What in the world did you do to earn those titles?

Felix must have read the disbelief on your face because he continued. “You and I have spent a lot of time together over the past months. I’ve learned a lot about you and your habits.” You blushed. He most definitely knows a lot about you. He’s seen a lot too. “I know you are a good person. I have an eye for these things.”

He winked at you and you huffed a chuckle.

“And Minho-hyung knows you are a good person too. He just has a different way of… expressing his feelings.” You scoffed and rolled your eyes. “No, it’s true! We discuss you and your progress often and the kind of leniency he gives you in this place is unheard of for anyone other than our circle. Even some of the house staff haven’t been allowed in some of these rooms you’ve seen.”

What on god’s green earth did you say to them to trust you? I mean, of course they can trust you. You bear no ill will toward any of them, not seriously anyway. But why do they think so? Felix could definitely see the confusion on your face when he gently placed a hand on your upper back and guided you two further into the treasure-trove of books.

“Don’t think about it too much, love. Just know that everything we do, we do out of good and pure intentions.”

You definitely thought about it too much.

__________________________________________

You were determined.

You were going to get out of that damned house, even if just for a minute, whether he liked it or not. By exploring the house, you ended up finding a board room, like true business-official type shit. A long table surrounded by office chairs and even a projector screen. And with a small tip from Felix, you knew they all happened to have a meeting that morning.

An actual business meeting. Not the one including half-naked women this time.

So, after gearing up in some serious workout attire, you marched yourself to that exact room, not even bothering to knock. You were on a mission. ”Lee Minho, I demand to be included in your training. I won’t take no for an answer!”

His were the first eyes you seeked out when you entered the room and you willed yourself to not back down.

You, then, remembered the presence of the other seven men in the room and how silent everyone had become. It was as if they thought, if they move even slightly, all hell would break loose. And by looking at Minho’s facial expression, they might have good reason to think as such.

”I. Said. NO. Now please see your way out. As you can see, we are clearly busy.” You were pissed, no, more than pissed, but you squared your shoulders.

However, before you could utter a word, Jisung spoke up. “Hyung. I think we should let her. She is obviously passionate about it.” Minho glared at his friend and then back at you. He was silent for a moment, as if he was deliberating, before speaking again.

”No.”

”FUCKING HELL, MAN! I have been sitting on my ass here for months now for a reason I’m sure everyone here already knows about—!“ You watched guilty expressions color the room. “—and now that I’m getting better, you’re not going to help me defend myself if something like that happens again?” You witnessed his eyes widen as a traitorous tear fell down your cheek. “Fuck. You. Lee Minho!”

Resilience be damned, you were itching to escape that suffocating room and the problem within it. You stormed away once more with a harsh slam of the door and a burning fire inside you fueled by hate and anger.

Fuck this.

__________________________________________

You felt a plop on the couch next to you and you jolted in place with a tiny squeak.

After the meeting room fiasco, you had been spending all of your time in the library. You were so immersed in your book that you didn’t even realize there was another presence in the room.

With a quick whip of the head and an incredulous look on your face, you watched Minho smirk next to you in amusement. “For someone who is super quick with their tongue, you sure are slow with everything else.” He chuckled as you came down from your fright and you placed a hand on your rapidly beating heart.

That motherfucker just about killed you! Well, not literally, but still! You closed your eyes to collect yourself before opening them again to glare at him.

However, instead of that same annoying smirk, his face turned into one of regret. “Shit, I’m sorry… I didn’t even think if that would make you… fuck, I didn’t—“

”It’s fine!” You quickly cut him off, knowing where he was going with that statement. “I-I’m fine… you just startled me a bit.” You calmly placed your bookmark before turning back to him with narrowed eyes. He looked a bit more relieved.

”Still, I need to be more… considerate.” He looked down at his hands, avoiding your eyes. “In more ways than one…” You furrowed your brows in suspicion before he returned your gaze once more. “I’ve thought about it a lot and I realized that I haven’t necessarily been easy on you throughout all of this. I might have played a part in helping you physically, but I didn’t consider how this would all affect you mentally.”

You were speechless. Was this the same man? He’s actually being… remorseful…

“So, yeah. Sorry about all that…” He awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck while averting his eyes. He clearly wasn’t used to apologizing so much. “I, um… I wanted to ask you if we could, like, start over?”

You had never seen the man fumble so much since meeting him and it was quite a refreshing sight. “Why? Are you about to drop another ridiculous rule on me and you’re just saying this to lessen the blow?” You huffed a bitter chuckle.

You could see his temper start to rise before he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I’m saying this…” There was a slight edge to his voice before he opened his eyes again with a much more gentle demeanor. “—because I am tired of us butting heads.” He slumped into the backrest and you arched a brow. “And also because you were right.”

Okay. Something is seriously wrong.

”I thought it would be dangerous for you to train with professionals and be subjected to a room full of random men.” He limply turned his head your way while remaining melted into the cushions. “And yes, there will be other men there. All of my subordinates use this training center. It’s one of my most used gyms for my… industry.”

You scoffed. “Pft. ‘Industry’” You mocked with finger quotations.

He smirked. “Yes. Industry.” His face gradually returned to a more serious disposition. “There is also the matter of secrecy.” You nodded your head. Yeah, that made sense considering his occupation, but who were you going to tell? “Not saying I don’t trust you—“

”Why do you trust me?” You blurted, the question still buzzing around in your mind like an annoying pest. He furrowed his brows as if he didn’t understand. You continued. “Like, yeah, I get why you saved me now and all, but why do you trust ME?”

His brow slightly softened and he cleared his throat. “Y-you have given me no reason not to trust you. Why? Did you do something?” He said with a smirk.

You rolled your eyes. “No, asshole. It’s obvious to me that you should trust me, but you’re just going to take my word for it? You must be a really shitty spy.” He guffawed loudly, sitting up with a bright grin as he seemed like himself again.

”You haven’t seen what I can do, Tinkerbell.” You rolled your eyes, but you did find the notion intriguing.

”Oh yeah? What can you do?” You could see a spark light up in his eyes as he stared into your own and you had to gulp down the saliva that pooled in your mouth from the sight.

”Well…” He shifted to face you, elbow now propped up on the back of the couch. “You’ll get to see some of it when we train you.”

You felt your heart jolt. “When you train me?” You felt the corners of your mouth slowly lifting and his followed right behind.

”We leave at noon. Unless you’ve changed your mind?” He mused.

”No! No, I want to!” You looked at the clock. 11:30. Shit, he couldn’t have told you a little sooner? You sprang to your feet and he stood as well. “Just let me go change and I’ll meet you in the foyer.”

He just gave you a brief nod before turning on his heel and leaving you giddily buzzing in your skin.

__________________________________________

Somehow, you had plenty of options to choose from, but you opted for a simple T-shirt and joggers. Not the cutest, but who were you trying to impress?

A vision of Minho flashed in your mind and you reeled from the thought. Ugh. Why did my head think of HIM? In fact, why were you thinking so much about him in the first place? You chalked it up to it being from interacting more frequently nowadays. Yes. That must be it. You resolutely threw on a hoodie over your shirt and marched your way to the foyer.

“You ready? It won’t be easy.” He said from where he was leaned up against the staircase banister. You took in the sight of his workout attire, not really taking the time to fully appreciate it until now.

He wore a loose pair of sweatpants and an airy tank top that allowed you to gaze at his intricate sleeve of tattoos once more. He would almost look human if he hadn’t been blessed with his other-worldly beauty.

You blinked away the thoughts and gave a firm nod to him in response. “I don’t want easy. I want effective.”

He smirked and stood up straight when you approached. “We’ll see soon how confident you are in that statement.” You glared and he gestured his head. “C’mon, let’s go.”

Instead of heading out the front, he made his way further into the house. You furrowed your brows. “Where are the other guys? And where are you going?”

”Tsk. So many questions!” He mused and grinned at your responding scowl. “The guys are already there and, as to where we are going…” He stepped up to a large door located in the next room and opened the door for you to enter first, your face surely gawking at the luxury. You heard a chuckle from behind you. “Your reactions are always so adorable.” He smoothly teased.

EXCUSE ME?!

You whipped around and glared at him as he just continued walking past you. “Now…” He turned back to face you again. “Which one do you want to take?” He said plainly as he gestured to the plethora of extremely expensive cars.

The garage definitely looked like it belonged in a spy movie, but you were stumped. He said he was like a spy. Not a spy. Like a spy. You were still racking your brain as to what that meant.

Your eyes grazed over the fancy marble interior of the museum-like garage and the cars on display. How can someone have this much disposable income?

You didn’t know the first thing about cars, why did you have to pick?

When you just pointed to some random car, he raised his brows. “Really? The Rolls Royce?”

“Well, shit I dunno! Why do I need to pick? You obviously know more than I do when it comes to this!”

He cackled and led you closer to your chosen car. “Oh, I know waaay more than you, Tink.” You grumbled and he chuckled as he opened the door for you, letting you slide into the disgustingly luxurious vehicle.

”Why do you even have all of these cars? Don’t you have someone else to drive you?” He donned a cocky half-grin when he slipped into the driver seat.

”Sure, when I’m on business I do. But we are just going to train.”

In the blink of an eye, his face was directly in front of yours as he reached across you, eyes fixed on your seatbelt strap as he grasped the material. As soon as he stretched it across your body, he seemed to notice your surprise.

He froze, blinked at you rapidly, then quickly averted his gaze back down to the strap to buckle you in. He cleared his throat and gulped before starting the car. “Plus…” He added with a slightly strained voice. “It’s not nearly as fun riding as it is driving.”

__________________________________________

“Was the bag seriously necessary? Who would I even tell?!” You seethed as you threw the black, silky fabric at him.

Before you two even left the driveway, he forced you to shove your head in a stupid black hood so you “couldn’t know the location” once you left the estate later. You told him that it was unnecessary and stupid, but the man insisted.

You ripped the damned thing off as soon as he put the car in park.

”Have you forgotten what I told you? About my work? Why are you surprised with the secrecy?” He explained calm and composed as he discarded the bag in the car again.

”Well then blindfold me next time! I could barely breathe!” You were over exaggerating, of course. That material was extremely airy and breathable, you just wanted to feel superior to such treatment.

”Well excuse me, your highness…” He rolled his eyes as he pulled out his keys and walked up to the door of a large, nondescript, concrete building. Unlocking and opening the door for you, he gave you an exaggerated bow.

You narrowed your eyes at him as you passed the threshold, and marched into what looked like a massive gym complex of some sort.

However, the entire building was devoid of life. Of course that’s not including the seven familiar figures you saw fighting on the far end of the room. ”I thought you said all of your employees train here?” You said with an arched brow.

Minho passed you with a shrug. “Not today they don’t.” Well that answered nothing…

”Hey there, girly! Ready to get that blood pumping?”

”Calm down, Changbin. She is still going through therapy, remember?” Dr. Chris told the younger muscle man from where he was doing crazy heavy deadlifts off to the side.

”I know, I know, grandpa.” Changbin smirked at the doctor’s glare. “But just remember: ‘What hurts today makes you stronger tomorrow.’”

The other men groaned in tandem and you found yourself slightly smiling. “That’s a great motivational outlook, Changbin.” You said to the group as you watched Changbin’s face light up.

”Okay, enough, enough.” Minho declared. “Today’s training is obviously a bit different than usual.” He gestured vaguely at you. “We have a base level trainee and she needs to be trained from ground zero.” He gave you a side-eye and a cocky smirk. “Maybe even lower than that…”

”Hey!” You made a move to give him a lighthearted shove, and then was immediately reminded of what happened last time as his hand shot to your wrist to stop the action. You tried to free yourself, but his grip was like stone. “Let me go, asshole!”

”Make me.” He said as he suddenly faced you, pulling you closer. “Come on, show me. What would you do if you wanted to be released?”

You didn’t have an answer for him. Any move you could possibly make would be caught by his cat-like reflexes. You just challenged him with your eyes before his own softened, along with his grip on your wrist.

Just as your wrist was released he gave you a couple pats on the head. “Don’t worry Tinkerbell. I’m sure you will figure it out eventually.” You just about growled at him as he walked over to stand by Chris who was now seated on a bench nearby. “Channie-hyung and I are just here to observe and critique ALL of you, so do your best.” The man made an annoyed expression and waved the back of his hand in front of him. “Well? Get on with it!”

With that, you found yourself surrounded by six (frankly gorgeous) men looming over you.

“Hey! Back off! Don’t all go at her at once! I said ground zero you pabos!” Minho shouted from the sidelines before the others retreated and Changbin stepped in front of you.

”Calm down, Minho. This is what I’m here for.” You breathed in a resolute huff and nodded at Changbin. “I’m ready.”

__________________________________________

“Watch out for her arm!”

…

”Don’t actually try to hurt her, idiot!”

…

”That’s too rough!”

…

The entire training session Minho had shouted at each and every one of the men trying to teach me at least once and it was growing tiresome. “Why even let me train if I can’t even, I dunno, actually train???” You grumbled at the stubborn man as the group was taking a break. “I have legitimately learned nothing with the parameters you have set!”

”For real, hyung. You aren’t letting her show her full potential. She needs—“

Minho instantly cut Changbin off. “I will decide what is needed and I think that it would be better for her to just watch for now. It’s obvious that she is not ready.”

”WHA—?” You squealed with widened eyes and a disbelieving expression.

”Actually, I think she is doing quite well in her recovery…” Dr. Chris stated matter-of-factly where he stood next to the other six men drenched in sweat.

You watched Minho slowly turn his murderous expression to the doctor, but you stepped into his line of sight before he had the chance to retaliate. “Please let me continue… I promise I will take it easy, I just…” You looked down at your restless hands before returning your gaze to his blackened irises. “This is just really important to me…”

You watched as the man’s face minutely softened and glanced at the seven men around you that also awaited his instruction.

”Please?” You implored, not used to such pleading from your end. His eyes darted back to you before he moved to rub his temples with a sigh.

“Fine.” He groaned. “But base-line self defense only. We can move on to more advanced training once you have recovered a bit more.”

You don’t know why you felt such relief come over you. Maybe it was the satisfaction of even marginally getting through to him, but you let a wide grin escape as your body involuntarily moved to hug the man.

What the fuck?

Just as quickly as you embraced the man, you retreated just as fast with furiously heated cheeks. Why in the world did you do that? You were FAR from hugging terms with him! He probably just about shot you in the head from the unexpected touch!

However, you couldn’t help but notice the citrus and sandalwood scent emanating from his solid, warm body. His skin felt like flames against yours and you welcomed the heat. It didn’t last long, but the simple contact with him made your blood boil and quickly reddened your entire face.

When you pulled back and cleared your throat, you witnessed a millisecond of bewilderment on his stone-cold face before it was immediately schooled back into place (but that did nothing to cover up his bright red ears). “Th-thank you.” You mumbled before you escaped to the water fountain that was, blessedly, on the other side of the room. Never mind the fact you had a water bottle already with you by the group…

__________________________________________

By the time you and the rest of the boys finished (which was a very productive start if you do say so yourself), Minho had informed he was called in for an unexpected ‘business meeting’ across town and that training would finish early for the day as he needed to take a couple of his men with him.

You were a bit disappointed, but at least you got to do something. Which was more than you expected honestly.

As you requested, you were blindfolded for the car ride back instead of the stifling bag he donned you with on the way there, but you rode back with only five of his men instead.

You could feel all of their eyes on you as you rode in silence. Jeongin drove the unnecessarily expensive limousine, Changbin, and Hyunjin sat across from you, and Felix and Chan bracketed you on each side.

The silence was even more suffocating than the bag you wore earlier as you felt yourself start to become antsy. “For the love of god, please someone say something! I feel like I’m an exhibit in a museum right now.” You whined and buried your face in your hands (even though you couldn’t see anything anyway).

”And what a lovely piece of art you are, darling~” Hyunjin lilted before you heard a slap of skin and an over dramatic squawk from said man.

”Yah! Don’t be a creep!” You heard Changbin exclaim as the precious Felix giggled next to you.

”It was supposed to be a compliment!” You heard someone click their tongue before Chan decided to speak up.

”It’s interesting isn’t it…” He commanded the whole group’s attention with practiced ease and you quickly realized the hidden influence this man had over the lot of them. Which would make sense due to the fact that the doctor had probably saved most of, if not all of their lives at some point in time. “I haven’t seen or heard of Minho ever taking it easy on a trainee before… Most of them have to come see me even after their first session with him.”

”For real though, the man is ruthless with everyone else! He will even push them through the pain of broken bones!” Hyunjin exclaimed incredulously.

”He wants to make sure they are prepared through anything, even excruciating pain.” Jeongin stated simply from the driver’s seat.

Holy shit, these guys are no joke! “What the fuck? Why can’t he do the same with me?!” The entire car went dead silent in response. You could feel the annoyance creep into your bones. “Is it because I’m a girl? Seriously?!”

You heard Felix scoff next to you. “As if.” He sputtered in amusement. “The female trainees are some of the toughest among all of us.”

Then why?

”Maybe he just has a soft spot for you…” You heard Hyunjin mumble and you outright cackled at that one.

”Are you kidding?! Have you seen the way he treats me??” You question with an incredulous chuckle.

“You never knooow~” Hyunjin stated with a teasing lilt to his voice before you heard another smack.

And before another word could be said, your blindfold was removed and you were ushered into the estate once more.

A soft spot? What a joke.

__________________________________________

I hope you guys are happy with the turn-around. 😏

I’ve missed you all so dearly and I apologize for the wait. 🥺 I would say that the next part will come out sooner, but I don’t want to guarantee that if life decides to fuck with me some more. 🙃

As always, please like, follow, and share!

Thanks baby Stays! Love you and missed you guys! 💋😽💋

And of course my squad and tag list:

@lyramundana

@channieandhisgoonsquad

@moonlightndaydreams

@queenmea604

@sweetracha

@rylea08

@maknaeswrld

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

[remembrancer-of-heresy]

The Eternal Night (Part 3)

Summary: Every night you become more attached to Sevatar. He, in turn, becomes obsessed with your connection.

Jago Sevatarion/fem!Reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, power imbalance, violence, predator/prey, rape (attempted), stockholm syndrome

Word count: 2252

Song: She Wants Revenge - Tear You Apart

I want to hold you close Soft breath, beating heart, As I whisper in your ear: I want to fucking tear you apart

You didn't talk to Sevatar about what happened that day. Was it really necessary? He is your master, he saved you from the Legion. You were to serve him faithfully and not ask questions. Even if his behavior was unusual for Space Marines.

However, Jago Sevatarion decided not to dwell on one incident. You also continued to clean his chambers. But at the same time he continued his strangeness. If the Astartes were an ordinary man, you would think that it was he who pestered you like that. One such thought was blasphemous. And yet…

He holds you too tight, too strong. You won't even be able to escape from his embrace if you wanted to. But you couldn't resist this feeling. There are monsters outside the doors, ready to tear your soul and body to pieces. They don’t even hide, because this is their land.

Only with Sevatar will you be safe.

The rough tongue slides over your shoulder again, reminding you of its owner. He was rude, but still tried to act gentle. It just wasn't in his nature. It's like caressing flowers with a knife. But even so. Even so, you liked it.

Sevatar squeezes you harder, leaving bruises all over your body. Your back is pressed tightly against his chest. There is no chance of running away. Especially when his teeth are so close to your skin. One wrong step and he will bite your flesh off. But for now he is treating you too softly.

Your skin under the tattoo has become too sensitive. Every touch of his fingers or tongue caused a strange feeling. Heaviness appeared in the lower abdomen, it was hot and you had to suppress a moan. This was embarrassing. To experience such feelings...

But this is connected not only with touches. All these conversations, a man's concern for you. After all, the first captain could mock you, not take you as his servant, or force you to do hard work. But he didn't do it. Your past life was harder than in the service of Sevatar. And then you weren’t touched that way before him.

Such moments did not happen every time. Not every night. But only in those moments when the space marine especially needed sleep. He was calmed by your presence, your movements, the way you cleaned up. But apparently touching you broke something in him. After which Sevatar fell asleep in an unusually sound and peaceful sleep.

Perhaps you should have been happy for him. It was true, it just still hurt. Lonely. You couldn’t understand where sympathy for Sevatar came from in your heart. It was a shame to feel like that. He was the Night Lord. He wanted and served the Emperor, you were not stupid. You knew he was still a murderer and a sadist.

And he's a Space Marine. You knew that men of his kind could not experience attraction. Sevatar has never seen and will never see you as a woman. All this time, you were nothing more than a piece of meat that calmed him down. It was annoying and easy at the same time.

You didn't want to give in to weakness. To feel fear of the horrors of NightFall, which grew into an obsessive desire to be protected. To be loved. Every day the hanging bloody flesh of your mistress was forgotten. The cries of the suffering prisoners echoed. You began to get used to this place, to your surroundings.

Disgusting.

You desperately wanted to save the remnants of your mind before it completely shattered. Preserve your humanity, kindness and mercy. You didn't want your heart to turn to stone. So that it beats again and fills with blood not only when Sevatar appears nearby.

Therefore, you began to leave your master’s chambers even more often and spend every free minute with the rats. Or with grandpa and other serfs if they were not busy. But mostly with your favorite friends. In addition, your diet improved and you were able to share more acceptable food with them.

Still, you couldn't help but worry. There are fewer of them. Much less. But the serfs did not pay attention to your friends, and the space marines even less so. So why did it seem to you that the disappearance of your little friends was not due to hunger? Rats could be cruel, but now there was no reason for them to kill each other. It could have been someone else.

Later, grandpa told you that recently the Night Lords brought one of many planets to the Imperium. As always, in a very perverted way, since the residents apparently did not have enough footage of the previous massacre. Many ended up in skinning pits. Some prisoners were specially taken to Nightfall to prolong the pleasure of torture.

Maybe one of the prisoners escaped? Hidden in the depths of the ship and somehow managed to escape pursuit? Eating scraps and rats, he survived in this gloomy and dark place. You felt sorry for your friends, but you also felt sorry for the prisoner. You couldn't give him away. So you decided to pretend you didn't notice anything. Close your eyes to what is happening, as you usually did. Only this time it was much easier to do.

But in the end, everything that is hidden will become clear. You saw him. A thin man whose ribs stood out against his skin. Covered in blood and filth. His growing hair and beard, his whole appearance, turned him into a beast. Once a former person.

He was just finishing the rat. And judging by the bones and meat scattered around him, it was not the first. He ate them all. He killed them all. The rats were not people, but they were dear to you. You guessed that this would happen, but when your thoughts become reality you feel sick. You sobbed.

The creature heard your sobs and turned around sharply. You froze. He's spent too long in pitch darkness, he can see you. You won't be able to hide. But maybe he will run away on his own? You pose no danger. And apparently the man knew this. You could tell by his hungry look and the saliva coming out of his mouth. They only look like that when they want to eat. He wanted it, just differently.

You ran. Heart was beating incredibly loudly, ready to jump out at any minute. You were out of breath, but the stomping from behind urged you on. And yet he caught you. He lay down on your back, breathing heavily into your ear.

“Woman, woman” - the older girls told you that men turn into animals at the sight of a woman. But right now there really was a monster above you, trying to take off his pants. - “Warm. Finally alive. D-don't move. Don’t c-cry, I’ll be quick.”

But you cried. You resisted. Even when he turned you around and punched you in the stomach.

“I-I'm marked. I have a tattoo.” - you choked on tears, not believing that this was the first time you had to talk about this. You desperately tried to stop the man from untying the knot of his pants. - “I serve Jago Sevatarion, the first captain. Y-you can’t touch me.”

"Shut up!" - the man slaps you in the face and you burst into tears. - “I don’t know anyone here. Just let me in. Open up. I want warmth.”

You see how he finally copes with his pants and something in you breaks. Having found a fragment from the bottle, you plunge it into the flesh. A cry of pain is heard in the compartment, but this only spurs you on. You were beaten. He wanted to hurt you. He wanted...

You were weak in body. And it's not that your spirit is strong. But the man in front of you was even worse. You felt sorry for him. And no. You stab the shard into the rapist a few more times until he runs away from you on all fours like a whining dog.

A shiver ran through your body, nausea rising in your throat. You looked at the bloody shard with tears in your eyes. Your whole body ached. Especially those places where you were hit. Especially your tattoo.

***

Sevatar found you in his chambers. Sitting in the darkest corner, covered in blood and dirt. You thought he would brush you off or tell you to clean up after yourself. But the pale face lit up with such rage that you had never seen. You barely held back a whine when he came up to you with lightning speed, pulling you towards him.

“Who did this?” - The first captain looked at you with an anger. The hands squeezed your shoulders painfully, leaving new bruises. - “Some kind of mortal degenerate since you are still alive. Did you show him my sign? Who was it?

“H-he saw it. I met him in the trash compartment. P-probably one of your prisoners.” - you are safe and the man was clearly worried. But why are you so scared? - “But he ran a-away and was hiding. And then we collided. He wanted, he wanted-"

“Rape you, yes, I know, I'm not an idiot.” - the space marine abruptly interrupts your babble and you fall silent. Sevatar looks into your red eyes and runs a finger across your cheek with amazing gentleness, wiping away a tear. - “The blood is not yours. Hurt him?”

Nod.

“Killed?”

You shake your head, almost hiccupping. No, you didn't kill him, you saw him run away. Yes, he was badly injured. Weak and lost too much blood. But could you kill him? And did you want this?

To your horror, you couldn’t really tell. Sevatar chuckles, clearly satisfied with this answer. He examines you one more time, lingering on all the places where your tormentor's blood got into. There was too much of it. Your face was probably all red.

“It suits you, mouse. But I don’t want you to smell like someone else, so wash it off.” - you don’t even have time to think about such strange words. Sevatar did not seem to understand what he said, continuing his thought. - “Since our guards are not coping with their duties, we will have to carry out a purge. We'll find that bastard too. He will receive his well-deserved punishment.”

Sevatar turns to leave the quarters. But he turns around for a moment to look you in the eyes again. All you can do is stand silently in shock. He obviously came to his chambers to rest. But he leaves as soon as he hears what happened to you. He leaves to fulfill his duty.

“Well done for defending yourself.” - an unpleasant grin passes over the pale face and the man chuckles. - “But you are terrible murderer. Lucky you have me.”

It didn't take long at all. As Sevatar later told you, the prisoner was quickly captured. He was bleeding and was on the verge of death. But the Apothecary saved him in time. So that the Astartes could later put their sentence into action, prolonging the man's torment as long as possible.

The warden and guards also received what they deserved. They didn't do their job. They allowed the prisoner to escape and showed the Legion to be weak. They put you in danger. Although you were sure that the first captain kept the last part only for himself and you.

Some were more fortunate, some less so. Some were reprimanded, others were transferred to other positions. Some were beaten. The overseer responsible for such an offense was, of course, gutted in front of his subordinates. So that the new person in his position would better carry out the orders of the Legion.

“Oh, and this is for you.” - the man hands you an iron box with a cooling regulator. You open it with fear and look at the contents in horror. A small human heart, red with blood, lay on pieces of ice. Still fresh.

“If it weren’t for our Apothecary, you would still have finished off this pathetic mortal.” - the man smiled. Just as always that smile gave an unpleasant feeling. But you knew that this time it was not an imitation. He was sincerely happy. - “So keep your trophy.”

“What should I do with it?” - you turn the box in your hands, remembering one of the recent conversations. You look at the first captain like a child who does not understand a simple task. - “Eat?”

“Hah, you can eat it. Or feed it to your rats. Or keep it for yourself as a reminder. Do whatever you want.” - the man speaks relaxedly while his unblinking black eyes look at the tattoo. - “You deserve it.”

Even though it was a human organ. And you never thought that you would keep someone's heart to yourself. And even though it's terrible. It was nice. Nice to receive something of your own as a sign of consolation. Albeit in the manner of the Night Lords.

"Thank you."

You say this quietly, with all the gratitude that glows in your living heart. The man is silent, continuing to look at you. A strange fire burns in the black eyes, which you have never seen before.

Like a mortal, but in a completely different way, Sevatar also wanted to eat you. And to your horror and pleasure, you realize that you would allow him to tear you apart.

"You're welcome."

[aftgficrec]

Hi! Thanks so much for doing this i have wanting to catch you open for so long!! How are you? I hope you have a good day!

I was wondering if there were any fics focused on neil and mary/neil and Nathan? Like his emotions, thoughts, etc, and the things he went through bcs of them/how they still affect him even now? Thank you so much in advance!

Our poor traumatized Neil! Yes, there is much to explore on this topic. -A

most previous asks lead to more recs:

angsty bad days for Neil here

Neil with ptsd here

more Neil with DID here

Neil cries, comforted by Andrew/foxes here

Neil says ‘it’s fine I’ve had worse’ here

Neil’s scars 2 here

scars and healing here

Neil goes to therapy here 

Neil attempts suicide here

‘You're Wonderful’ here

‘Hold My Hand?,’ ‘I'll Still Solve You,’ and ‘Fear (but not of you)’ here

‘The Books of Baltimore’ series: ‘Ghost of You’ here, ‘Run to You’ here

‘the upswing’ (completed), ‘please (don't bite),’ ‘Will you love me for who I am…’ ‘To be safe,’ ‘Safe with him,’ and ‘i called your name ‘til the fever broke’ here 

‘my friends and I…,’ ‘Pasts Intertwined,’ ‘My Stomach is a Wasteland,’ ‘side effects may vary’ ‘Bad Apple,’ and ‘You Are So Much More Than Your Father's Son’ here 

‘Medicated rabbits don't run as fast’ here

‘Broken Symmetries’ and ‘No More Fucks To Give’ (updated) here

‘24 Floors’ here

‘A Quiet Little Seedling,’ ‘If I Knew You,’ and ‘Step By Step’ here

‘slow down (you crazy child),’ ‘Make a Home’ (updated), and ‘make me a promise’ here

‘Dreamed in red’ here

‘...Just Us, and Y(our) Friend Kevin’ here 

‘Nothing Mattered Until You’ here (jeanneil)

amputation or permanent leg damage:

Neil's legs (the fucked up edition) here and here

Neil dies/amputations in Baltimore here

‘La jetée n'est plus loin’ here

‘I’m More Than This Body of Mine’ here (completed)

‘Next to You’ here

‘Rare pair hell series’ part 9 here

‘Live for you / Stay for me’ here 

‘“I pick up daddies at the playground.”’ here

‘lie to me (for i do not wish to live the truth)’ here

‘White Hands’ and ‘If Neil, Then Fox’ here

‘(don’t fear) the reaper’ here

‘Under the kitchen lights…’ here

‘Point Nemo’ here

‘Lifelines’ here

‘does the dog die at the end’ here

you may also like:

Neil runs after joining the foxes 2 here

andreil on the run from the mafia here

soulmates who feel each other's pain here

Mary/Nathan's people come back here

Mary tries to take Neil from the foxes here

Neil kills Nathan here

tell me where i came from, what i will always be by geeseproblems [Rated G, 317 Words, Complete, 2021]

She lives in his body like no other.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: canonical character death

Down with Something by pawnofkings [Rated T, 3051 Words, Complete, 2021]

Neil is sick, and he does his best to keep anyone from finding that out. He collapses in the middle of practice.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse

you asked for this by Anonymous [Rated M, 790 Words, Complete, 2022, Locked]

Neil Josten and guilt

tw: implied major character death, tw: child abuse, tw: emotional abuse, tw: blood, tw: negative self talk

A reflection or a lie by ShadowDolphin [Rated G, 839 Words, Complete, 2022]

Sixteen year old Neil Josten has an identity crisis cuz depersonalization is a wonderful thing that exists and he doesn't feel real

tw: implied/referenced child abuse

i know you'll take me with you by lil_macaroon [Rated T, 6129 Words, Complete, AFTG Mixtape Exchange 2023]

Neil has feelings that make him want to run. The only thing that keeps him at Palmetto State, hell, what keeps him in South Carolina, is the promise he made when Andrew asked him to stay three years ago. Unable to run, it all keeps building within him until one day, Andrew puts him in the car, and they go.

keep your head above the water (I can’t) by drewdrop44 [Rated T, 1156 Words, Complete, 2022]

The feeling of water moving over his head, swallowing him whole. Neil woke with a scream trapped in his mouth.

tw: drowning, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: violence, tw: nightmares 

It's a punch and a kiss, I'm trying to remember by beckdarkthrone [Not Rated, 18604 Words, Incomplete, Updated June 2024]

He has a hold on himself as Neil, as Abram, as Nathaniel.. Until he doesn't.

tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: dissociative disorder, tw: blood, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: internalized homphobia

NB: this author has a podcast with aftg-centric episodes; check out ‘So You Think You Like’ on spotify.

We're all Monsters Here by serene_chaos [Not Rated, 892 Words, Complete, 2022]

"I am part of the slaughter house. I feel that makes me more of a monster than you.” “Don’t look at me to absolve you.” Andrew flicks his cigarette towards Neil. Sparks landing inches from Neil’s hand. OR Neil doesn't think Andrew is a monster, but thinks he might be.

tw: childhood trauma, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture

Who Am I to You? by serene_chaos [Rated M, 91907 Words, Incomplete, Updated April 2024]

Neil Josten was born with violence in his blood and raised as a weapon to hide in plain sight. And then he finds himself surrounded by foxes and his usual survival tactics ruined by a five foot goalie. The whole mobster mafia problem isn’t helping either. -- Cue a Neil who cares a little less, a past raven, and potentially a little something more to live for.

tw: attempted rape, tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: murder, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: attempted nonconsensual drug use, tw: panic attacks, tw: flashbacks, tw: homophobia, tw: alcohol abuse/alcoholism, tw: animal abuse, tw: implied/referenced self harm 

you will always be my favorite form of loving by something_boring [Rated T, 15831 Words, Complete, 2024]

5 times the Foxes tried to take care of Neil and 1 time they didn't have to.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: panic attacks, tw: nightmares, tw: alcohol abuse, tw: blood, tw: vomit, tw: violence, tw: bullying

pain our brain has made by pipedreamaddy [Rated M, 16052 Words, Incomplete, Updated July 2024]

Neil and his discovery that he has trauma-induced migraines because we all know how he neglects his health. Between everything else going on with him, a migraine seemed very minor to him. But now that he is in a healthy, safe, and loving environment where he is thriving, he can take care of himself—theoretically speaking, at least. Or the fic where Neil finally gets the healing that he needs.

tw: needles, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: childhood trauma, tw: implied/referenced torture,  tw: flashbacks, tw: ptsd, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced murder

Keep Your Head Down and Don't Look Back by Capheira [Rated G, 775 Words, Complete, 2024]

Neil has spent most of his life running from his past but perhaps this time he was a little too efficient.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: panic attacks

Scars Like Stars by Kory_Rory [Rated T, 3429 Words, Incomplete, Updated June 2024]

Neil deals with his trauma by biting himself while being completely oblivious to the harm he's putting himself through. But it's okay cause the foxes are there to help him :)

tw: self harm, tw: body dysmorphia, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: negative self talk, tw: flashbacks 

I’m not used to all this water, love (it’s true) by niicowo [Rated T, 1415 Words, Complete, 2024]

Neil never thought anyone could ever love him. His parents never made him feel loved. But then again, what did he know about love? Nothing, he guessed. But one thing he did know was that Andrew loved him. And he just may love him too.

tw: past suicidal ideation, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced child abuse

Razor’s Edge by godless_writer [Rated T, 2178 Words, Complete, 2023]

Neil Josten, a caring, shit-talking, striker for the Palmetto State Foxes. Nathaniel Wesninski, a runner, and the son of The Butcher of Baltimore. When Neil thinks that Andrew is in danger after he walks into Kevin and Andrew fighting, his world turns red and those lines become blurred.

tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: dissociation

Don't let me be by Cutie_Wan [Not Rated, 1983 Words, Complete, 2023]

Neil suffers a major dissociation episode in front of the Foxes.

tw: dissociation, tw: self harm, tw: violence

grin and bear it by wlwmlmsolidarity [Rated G, 1221 Words, Complete, 2024]

neil has chronic pain due to lola and tries to just ignore it and push through on a bad pain day, andrew forcefully makes him relax and accept help

tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: chronic pain

NB: includes fanart by @clementinecloudz

scream and yell but i feel speechless by DepressedTerrestrial [Not Rated, 6770 Words, Complete, 2023]

Neil had some unnecessary surgery done when he was younger. No one (including Neil) knows how to handle this except for Andrew (kind of).

tw: past medical abuse, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture

Isn't he the monster by DarkD [Not Rated, 16033 Words, Complete, 2021]

On a day when Neil "wakes up" in a particularly bad mood, hearing anyone being cruel to Andrew becomes unbearable to the point that he is on the verge of an explosion.

tw: violence, tw: blood, tw: self harm, tw: dissociation, tw: panic attacks, tw: child abuse

Art

Day 19: bullet and Day 4: stitches art by @thefluffiestbird

Nathan was known for his extravagant parties and incredible entertainment art by @mac-monsters; twitter

Neil & Mary on the run edit by @romanovass

These ouches feel a little rough for a child on the run. comic by @softerstorms

“Don’t you dare be more afraid of me than you are of Andrew” art by @rainbowd00dles 

There’s nowhere to run art by @/tryashaa on instagram

“I’m fine” - *literally dying* art by @/koldangrey_art on instagram

[nalyra-dreaming]

i’m sorry I’m sorry, one second one second…the rapes in tale of the body thief ?? oh my god!! what!! if you don’t mind, can I ask you who committed them and against who? and what was the context that you talked about?

So, just as a note, there are quite a few rapes in the chronicles.

In "The tale of the Body Thief" Lestat rapes a waitress because he is back in a mortal body and is overwhelmed with it (not an excuse, just the fact), and then later he rapes David into darkness in an attempt to make himself believe he is evil (also not an excuse, just the fact) by echoing what Magnus did to him.

You might... need to read the book, to get the whole context, but... well. It's not as clear cut as it may seem here.

The tale of the Body Thief... is about guilt, body dysmorphia, suicide attempts, moral capitulations and hope against hope, and forgiveness. It is Lestat's book about... dealing with the crippling guilt of what happened with Claudia and being who he is. And what he is.

Since Raglan James is from that book I do think they are already laying the corner stones of going there.

There's also some very intense Loustat scenes in there, which is why both Sam and Jacob already said that they really want to do it.

[elysianholly]

The First

So I’m in Season 3 of my Buffy rewatch and just passed Amends, and holy cow, is this ever an informative episode.

We have the first appearance of The First, who will go dormant again for four years until emerging as the Big Bad in Season 7. The entire conceit of this episode is The First understands Angel’s desires and weaknesses and tries to manipulate those to its own end.

And what is Angel’s desire? Buffy, obviously.

The First knows Angel has the capacity to hurt Buffy. He's done so already, after all. More than anyone else has at this point in the series.

And in fairness to Angel—he is trying very hard in this episode. He’s being tormented by visions of his victims, most prominently the visage of Jenny Calendar. These visions weaken him to the point where he shows up in Buffy’s room specifically to tell her to “stay away from him.” But he can’t stay away from her—even Buffy points out that he’s not making any sense.

And there is Jenny Calendar in the background, saying:

“She wants you to touch her. What are you waiting for?” “She wants you to taste her. Think of the peace. You'll never have to see us again.”

Essentially making the “she was asking for it” case to goad Angel into SAing Buffy. This wouldn’t be nearly as telling on its own, without Angel’s admission at the end of the episode:

Angel: It told me to kill you. You were in the dream. You know. It told me to lose my soul in you and become a monster again. Buffy: I know what it told you. What does it matter? Angel: Because I wanted to! Because I want you so badly! I want to take comfort in you, and I know it'll cost me my soul, and a part of me doesn't care.

Now, it’s important to acknowledge that despite this desire, Angel did not give in. He did not SA Buffy. He did not try to touch her. He chose death instead. It is equally important, however, to acknowledge that the reason he was so tormented in this episode is because The First was appealing to an existing desire that he was trying to suppress, specifically the knowledge that:

He could do this

He has done this

Some part of him still wants to do this

The “Because I wanted to” admission is everything. Without it, The First has no hold on Angel. Remove the Buffy of it all and The First could taunt him with victims past, sure, but its goal was very specific: get Angel to go bad. And failing that, get Angel to remove himself from the equation. I’m sure it would have also accepted “get Angel to violate Buffy and spiral even further” because, as we see at the end, the Powers need him to believe in himself. The best way to get Angel to not believe in himself is to make him responsible for harming Buffy.

Anyway, skip ahead. Like four years ahead.

We have almost the exact same situation. Spike is newly souled and tormented by both his past victims and especially what he did to Buffy. We have The First now appearing AS BUFFY to Spike, Spike incapable of discerning what’s real and what’s not, and confirmation that The First definitely has plans for him. Plans that will position him in opposition to Buffy, weaken her, and essentially kill any chance that she will do exactly what she ends up doing.

It’s also important to note that Spike is much less mentally sound than Angel was when The First starts fucking with him.

So what does The First do? It brainwashes him. It notably does not try to convince Spike that Buffy “wants him to touch her.” It does not play on an existing desire to cause Buffy harm. It does not attempt to appeal to the part of Spike that assaulted Buffy in the bathroom the way it appealed to the part of Angel that spent years happily assaulting women before he was cursed.

And this is important because if that desire existed, there would be literally no reason for The First not to use it. Are we expected to believe The First evolved in the years since it attempted to goad Angel into attacking Buffy because “she was asking for it?" That orchestrating another assault wouldn’t further isolate Spike, if not drive him to do what Angel nearly did and remove himself from the equation entirely? We know from later in the season that The First is fine with Spike killing himself. Hell, we're shown that if The First can't use Spike, it wants him dead and is willing to manipulate others to see that realized.

But The First literally had to brainwash Spike to get him to do anything it wants, and the second it unleashes him on Buffy, he snaps out of it. She brings him back to the light. She says she'll help him.

And The First is noticeably pissed off. This was not what it wanted. Spike under Buffy's care was dangerous to its goal.

So why didn’t it try to manipulate Spike into assaulting Buffy again? Make sure she'd never invite him back inside her home? Why didn't it appeal to his worst urges the way it did Angel?

Angel: Because I wanted to!

Like I said, Amends is an informative episode. It shows us how The First operates (doubled down in S7 with its manipulation of Robin Wood). Even more, how The First interacts with Angel compared to how it interacts with Spike tells us a lot about who these characters are as men, as vampires, and specifically men who have hurt Buffy.

[worst-mother-throwdown]

BRACKET 1

Round 3

TW: child abuse, emotional abuse, mass murder, manipulation, attempted murder, drowning, sexual abuse, rape

Titania propaganda

Cordelia propaganda

[insom-nom-nom-niatic]

Female reader x Troy Otto after he "died" the reader was the one who stabbed him after he got to grabby you her she stabs with his knife and ran off she the only doctor so she valuable to the group he would also like his knife back. Maybe after a couple month he finds her and I would like some choking but anything would good

SORRY IT TOOK FOREVER!!! I hope you enjoy it.

CHARACTERS: Troy Otto X Fem Reader (third person for some reason cause that's what happened)

WARNINGS: It's made for FTWD so you should know the basics. +SMUT (read at your own risk. I'm nobody's mom) +Choking +Somewhat past possible attempt at r**e but he didn't didn't and he'd have stopped.

“Turns out being stabbed a second time hurts more than the first.”

“Good. I meant for it to hurt.” Her voice cut through the air like his knife did as it cut through his muscle. Her features showed no sign of surrender or fear, only sincerity in her words as the torch flame flickered their shadows on the cement walls. 

Troy raised both hands in surrender, his eyes glancing down to the same knife once stained with his own blood and back into her eyes. His shoulders tensed under his black jacket as her knuckles faded to a paler color gripping the handle of the sharp blade tighter. She had no reason to trust Troy after the last meeting the two had, yet, looking at the man out of his element and with no one around to make him feel taller than he already was, there was a certain chord he hit somewhere in her stomach. She didn’t feel that she was in danger, rather and oddly the opposite.

“Maybe it hurt a bit more because of who it came from.” He stood still as a tree, looking back to the woman through his eyelashes subconsciously. He was here on a mission to bring her back, but seeing her now and the life she’s had since that day months ago made a pit in his stomach open and swallow his heart whole. 

It had been 6 months give or take since she fled. Fled into the cold, rainy night unsure of what terrors where beyond the small compound. But she had to go, at least that’s what her body told her to do in the moment, there was no turning back. It took about a month for her to miss what she had. A roof over head, food and water, and most of al the protection that one Mister Otto provided. 

Ever since day 1 of finding the group, back when there was only a few of them, she could always feel something different with Troy than with any of the other men or women. He looked at her different. Talked to her different. He acted, well, gentler with her than anyone else even as the group grew to more than a few dozen. He told her on multiple occasions how they all needed her… how he needed her. 

He said that same thing the night everything changed. 

“You didn’t listen and forced my hand, Troy. Do you think I like starving out here on my own? I couldn’t come back and deal with any possibilities of YOU.” 

Ouch. Troy felt her words like a punch in the jugular. His eyes couldn’t hide the wince of pain he felt as his blue and white orbs fell to the ground at her boots astrown with holes. He thought back to that night, a night that has haunted him since. The look in her eyes when he felt the searing heat of his own blade slicing his flesh open. The apprehension that was once in her eyes now flickered with rage as she looked directly into his one good eye, pulling the blade back with force and bolting out the door, leaving his howls of pain and his own anger behind her. 

She left him alone. A nightmare he had only ever shared with her. 

“I know,” Troy’s entire expression fell like the edges of his lips. Her grip on the blade loosened as he continued. 

“I have regretted that night since, regretted what I tried to do and-” his eyes caught ahold of hers, both stomachs dropping at the same time before he continued. “-not listening to you. All those times that I told you that the group needed you, I wasn’t lying. They need you more than they need me so if that’s what it takes then-” 

“You’re going to leave for me to come back?” She cut Troy off mid sentence, shocking them both. The grin pulling at the ends of his lips to her question secured the answer both knew, but Troy was honestly questioning if he would do as he said for her. 

“Is that really what you want, darling?”

“No, no, no, no. Don’t you call me that, Troy.”  His voice changed back to the Troy she knew, the Troy that made her so irritated and yet welcomed and needed. His little pet name she only ever heard him reserve for her. She hated how much she loved it, but now was not the time for his little mind games. 

“Look-” Troy lowered his hands, resting both comfortably on his hips with his head rolling back in a stretch before meeting her gaze again. “-I know where you’re at now so the option is to come back with me willingly now or I’ll carry you kicking and screaming and the walkers can pick us both off together then leaving the group without a doctor or a leader.” 

The look he gave was unfaultering even through his bluff. She knew Troy wouldn’t force her to accompany him if she didn’t want to, and looking around the small cement room she didn’t have many reasons to NOT want to go back. But she knew if she didn’t go now, he’d end up sending a large enough group to her coordinates that she’d have to leave. It was a decision of eating roadkill for another week or not, and the growing smirk on the brunette's face solidified the answer. 

“You’re not getting your knife back.” 

“Oh c’mon!” She returned the smirk, sliding the sharp, freezing blade into the back of her jeans whilst kicking dirt on the smoldering fire, dimming the light in the room to the single lantern behind the tall brunette. 

A pit in her stomach arose, looking back at the small dug out she called home for the last few months before carrying on behind the footsteps of Troy Otto.

Her nuisance.

Her monster.

Her torment.

Her protector.

And possibly, her savior.  

As night ran into day, both she and Troy’s speed wavered. His footsteps lagged with each step whilst her hands pulled her weight forward tree after tree, both too stubborn to say it was time for a rest. 

Suddenly, a low growl came from the ditch 5 feet from their left. One growl turned into 5 moans, turned into 10 grunts and so on. Both stopped in their steps, hearing the rumbling below the dirt embankment grow with each step they took. 

Sharing a glance, She pushed Troy’s shoulder towards the sound, egging him to go see what they are facing. 

Begrudgingly, Troy cautiously snuck to the edge of the embankment, peering over for a heartbeat or two before a few large footsteps brought him back to her. His hands resting on her upper arms, somehow soothing, while his eye searched the surroundings opposite from the sounds. 

“C’mon, this way,” Troy whispered into her ear before pulling one hand along behind his back. She didn’t pull away, didn’t even notice what he’d done until the cold recaptured her skin moments later. 

As the sun set on another night somehow still breathing, she watched as Troy set traps surrounding the small camp you both had made within only a few good minutes. He swore he would stay awake throughout the night, keeping watch, and yet he paced the perimeter around the small camp fire you’d made, placing leaves and anything that would alert to movement around. 

As he finally sat opposite of her, she couldn’t helo the smile that arose her lips. 

“What?” Troy asked, his cheeks heating from within. That look, the look he’d only ever felt from her made his stomach ache with a hunger he’d only felt a handful of times. He rose to his feet once more, turning to hide the flush he knew she’d be able to see on his skin. 

“Oh c’mon, Troy. Don’t be like that!” Her tone changed to playful and open, like she once was with  him. Glancing down at her shivering fingers, the realization set in. She hadn’t felt this way, hadn’t sounded like that, since she’d been in his company. And even then, it was only ever in HIS company. 

“Come sit. Please?” 

A large breath left Troy’s chest, battling his own heart and mind was something he was used to but having her here again made his whole body numb. He finally obliged, turning on a heel and padding his large footsteps ever softly on the dirt towards her. Looking around one more time for any signs of the deead, or worst any living, before taking a seat beside her. His nose once again thanking him for the fire light in the dense cold. 

“You saved my ass back there,” Her words were soft, sincere. “So thank you, I guess. If it was just me again I probably would have been toast.” 

“You would have been fine, I’m sure.” Troy played with the scar on the back of his left palm. His right thumb digging into the rough scales of skin, the heat she gave off next to him nearly matched that of the fires. It felt good, warm. Yet, he the uneasy feeling was unwavering. 

“You‘ve known that all this-” she gestured to their surroundings. “-This was never MY strong suit. I patch up the people that are good at this kind of thing. People like YOU.” 

She earned a chuckle from the brunette, his shoulders shaking slightly bringing his eyes back up to meet the fires dancing flames. 

“I suppose you always did do a pretty decent job at fixing me up.”

“DECENT?! Oh, I did a whole hell of a lot better than decent with the stitches in your bicep, or your calf, or your left, and don’t forget about the right pec. I bet you can’t even tell you ever were wounded.” 

“You didn’t do a very good job on my thigh-” Troy stopped after that one word. He shouldn’t have said it, he shouldn't have brought it up. Dead silence fell between the two, not even the crickets had the guts to make a sound. 

“I made sure to not hit your femoral vein if that’s any consolation.” Her voice was that of a mouse. So quiet that Troy wasn’t sure if he had merely imagined it. Until he glanced slowly in her direction, catching that look of shame she had only shown once or twice, making his frown shift. 

He wanted to give her a side eye, cautionary and intense, but he had decided to sit on her right which meant his side eye had to be a full look over for his good eye to catch the way she sucked in air through gritted teeth.

Smooth Troy, very smooth. 

He felt her weight shift a tad, looking over to see her body in a full shiver before trying to hide it again. He rolled his jacket off his broad shoulders, catching the back and draping the hefty coat around her. The look she gave him didn’t need words, as he gave a half smile and turned back towards the glowing flames. 

What seemed like hours had passed in silence, comfortable silence, before Troy felt her weight lean into his side. His head swiveled in her direction, his breath caught in his throat when he felt the closeness of their faces in the dimming light. 

She didn’t turn away this time when he gave into his impulse. His flesh melting with her own. He never fully understood how humans had the ability to somehow find their partner’s lips in the dark until that moment when everything seemed to click. 

Neither one was expecting this, rather the opposite. She was expecting to not live to see their group again and he’d figured she was going to end him with his own knife one night in his sleep. But as life has it, something in their fate changed. 

Feeling his warmth only inches from her, she caved. Pressing her weight into him in a full kiss, her eyes drifting closed taking in his lips, his scent, his touch. Both grasping for skin as they weaved their lips together, his tongue nudging at her bottom lip while his hands roamed her body.. 

A sudden pressure was released from her waste band. Cool air drifting over exposed skin as Troy’s lips curved against the pulse of her neck. His chest wavered with a deep chuckle as his head fell backwards with a toothy grin in a croak of laughter. 

“This is mine now,” Troy waved his knife in the air above the two, like a child finally getting back their favorite toy. “Well... again.”

Sitting back on her elbows, the woman shook her head slowly, unable to help the grin growing on her features. He was such a literal pain in the ass but when he was like this, when he wasn’t so serious and did that little giggle of his she couldn’t help but fall further down his rabbit hole. 

His eye caught hers again, shadows flickering in the movement of the flames at their feet as he curled one arm around her torso moving to hover over her form without ant loss of eye contact. He was afraid he’d see that fear in her irises again like the last time they were this close, but he caught submission, adoration, maybe some excitement instead. 

His body moved against hers, clothing against disheveled clothing causing friction against both their skin. She was sure he could feel the heat radiating through her body where his hips rolled against hers. His sweet moan filling her senses as his eye bore down on her. His eye grew dark, lustful, wanting more than just the friction of clothing. He wanted to warm her up in the cool dark night in more ways than just this. 

The small bite of her lip and a nod gave him all the leeway he needed. Not a second passed before his lips were suctioned back onto hers. His tongue forced its way through partially opened lips as his fingertips did the same to her waistband. She was in such a flurry she didn’t even realize where his hand had disappeared to until his lips traveled to her ear, whispering how wet she had become before a wave of heat ran up her spine, arching her back against his touch as his cold hand palmed her most sensitive bundle of nerves. 

Choking on air, she breathed deeply into the skin exposed on Troy’s neck above her. Her fingernails gripped the jean jacket covering his shoulders as he nipped little bites down her neck and onto her chest. His movements faltered as he glanced up, catching sight of the woman clenching her eyes closed, teeth gritted on her bottom lip sure to cause blood. Something about that aroused Troy further, quickening his hand free from her jeans and making short work at removing the slightly damp piece of clothing. 

Staring down at her form, Troy felt his member twitch, longing to be free from it’s confines. She wore a simple pair of blue panties that caressed her just right, barely covering her modesty from what he could see in the dimming fire light. Her thighs twitched under his gaze, her meat looking as delicious as the shy giggle that escaped her swollen lips. 

His gaze shifted up her body, taking note of every cut and bruise that covered it before locking gaze with her again. Her eyes had darkened as his did as he shrugged his light jacket off, throwing it towards a tree to their left. His white T-shirt following suit. 

From where she lay, she could see the bulge in Troy’s pants shiver with every movement she made beneath him. Her foot nudged his ass whilst he removed his shirt earning a throaty groan from the brunette between her legs. She scanned his body in the shadows, her gaze stopping on the last wound she cured. A large scar on his abdomen still ever present as a wave of his cries of pain fled like a stream through her ears. 

Troy saw the way her eyes changed, knowing she was occupied elsewhere in that pretty little mind. Clearing his throat, he regained her attention only to give her a little show taking off his jeans. He forgot she hadn’t seen the scar she herself gave him until the moment her eyes once again fell. Her fingers reached out, pulling her to sit in front of him as she ghosted her fingertips over the scaled skin. 

She sure did a good job leaving her mark. 

Troy gave her a moment, but no longer than that before his fingertips caressed her chin. His callouses rubbed her soft, cold skin raising her attention to look him in the eye. The smirk she was met with sent another shiver down her spine, this time accompanied by a hefty gulp and a new warmth dripping from her core. 

One hand dipped lower, finding her folds with ease, applying just enough pressure to earn a whimper from her as his other hand draped around her neck. With a catch in her breath, her eyes shot open with a smirk feeling his fingertips close around delicate skin. 

Her own fingers traced harder over the scales on his thigh but eventually gave in to his touch, leaning backward until her back once again met the cold, hard dirt. Her hands dug small scrapes through the pine needles cushioning around her. Troy’s grip on her throat didn’t relent as his other hand delved one digit, now warmed between the two, into her glistening core. With every pulse that clenched down on his finger, his own member reciprocated. 

The cold air around them was a welcomed element. He knew he wasn’t going to be able to resist her much longer as he rubbed his clothed cock on her inner thigh. 

He wanted her to need him. 

He waited for her to need him. 

He needed her to need him. 

As his name dripped from her lips, Troy couldn’t hold back any longer. He didn’t waste time undressing any further as he pulled his underwear down just enough to release his begging cock before replacing his finger with a much larger fulfillment. 

He watched as her eyes clenched shut, a single tear running from one corner of her eye glistening from the shallowly dancing flames. His grip on her neck released at the feeling of her nails raking down his bicep. Her touch melded with the sweet smell of her arousal and gasps of breaths, his thrusts unrelenting. Filling her to the brim over and over. Watching her face contort in ecstasy whilst he sucked in his bottom lip to keep from silent. The only thing he couldn’t muffle were the grunts and groans that escaped him and the sound of bet skin meeting wet skin with such force and need that would make even a nun blush. 

Troy felt her begin to spasm in an eruption of an orgasm. 

It was in her breathing. It was in her nails grazing his skin. It was in the way her body contracted around his cock. It was in the way she whispered sweet-nothings only he will ever know as she bit down on his shoulder, surely leaving yet another one of her marks on his skin. 

He knew he needed to pull out, his own release matching hers. But the way she felt, how she looked, the way she smelled and sounded filled his senses and all Troy could think about was painting those glorious, tight walls of her with his seed. It was a dangerous game they were playing, he knew that. 

And still he did as he pleased. 

His body fell atop hers. All strength leaving him in his release as he collapsed above her, limp dick still within her walls feeling every pulse her body made. 

Everything was silent, the world seemed to disappear as the two soaked up each others heat as the sweat balls rolled off each others skin and into the earth below. 

When the sun began to rise, shining brilliantly through the fog lifting from the tree tops, the pair shared a look. 

“We should get going I suppose. One more day to camp, right?”

Troy nodded silently, a small grin returning to his swollen lips as he chewed his tongue slightly. “I’ve been used to sleepless nights, but this one took a bit more out of me so keep it slow.” 

The woman giggled hopping to her feet and extending an open hand down to Troy, both fully knowing if he took it he'd pull them both down.

“Who knew you’d be such a little chatter box after intimacy, Mr. Otto. The sleeplessness wasn’t fully my fault I do recall.” 

Troy leaned his head back against the tree where both were once propped up on, a toothy smile adorn on his tired and satisfied face. His chest heaving with a silent laugh before shoeing her hand away with a grunt to his feet.