#Tris declaring Pike should walk in front of a truck courtesy of our very own KP

[dysco-lymonade]

What about a silly 3 men and a baby type fic except it's just Clexa somehow getting an infant forced on them out of the blue and then falling in love while figuring out how to care for the kid. Or maybe you could do one where one gets a letter not meant for her and it's from the other. The rest is up to you😂

I will be affectionately referring to this AU as 2Girls1Baby until I think of, or am recommended a new title.

This is a work in progress, but I wanted to give you a little snippet, Anon, because this AU is living in my head rent-free now.

A little back story. Raven and Anya have an 18 month old baby, and they have to go out of town. Their last resort for childcare is leaving their daughter, Tris, with Clarke and Lexa.

Clarke and Lexa have been roommates for a while now, really only knowing each other through Anya and Raven. Anya is Lexa's sister; Raven is Clarke's best friend. They live together, but don't really associate aside from that.

“So what now?” Clarke looks at Lexa, perplexed.

“Well, I guess we'll just keep her alive until Monday. That won’t be too hard… Right?” Lexa searches for comfort in Clarke’s gaze, receiving nothing of the sort.

“Anya is your sister! This is your problem.” Clarke gestures toward the 18 month old in the car seat currently chilling on their living room floor, kicking her feet at a dangling raccoon that is attached to the handle of her carrier.

“Raven is your best friend!” Lexa scolds in a hushed voice, not wanting to disturb the currently occupied toddler.

“Blood is thicker than water, right?” Clarke scoffs and walks away, to close herself up in her bedroom as per usual.

With a heavy sigh, Lexa cautiously approaches the toddler. “Hey, Tris.” She mumbles, “I’m your Aunt Lexa, we’re going to be great friends.” Suddenly, Tris realizes that neither of her mothers are within sight.

A wail that Lexa is surprised didn’t shatter their windows, falls from Tris’s mouth.

“Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, no. Shh- Shh, it's okay sweetheart. You’re okay. Aunt Lexa’s got you. We’re going to have so much fun…” Lexa searches around the living room, desperate to find something to occupy this kid’s attention. Anya had warned her that they were trying to limit her time with electronics, so she wouldn’t become reliant on them. The TV was out of the question.

Lexa whips her phone out of her pocket, scrolls through Spotify, and comes across a Disney playlist. She turns it on, and connects the phone to the bluetooth speaker in the living room.

“HAKUNA MATATA WHAT A WONDERFUL PHRASE” comes out entirely too loud, and only makes Tris cry harder.

“Shit, shit, shi- shoot, shoot, crap, dang it.” Lexa silences her phone. “Okay, maybe a bit more preparation for that, eh? Okay, so, find the speaker… where is it? Oh, there it is!” She locates the bluetooth speaker next to the television. “Now to turn the volume down, huh? That was wayyyy too loud. Aunt Clarke must have been in the zone the last time she was painting.” Lexa continues to ramble to herself, not realizing until she pulls her phone back out that Tris has stopped her wailing.

“Oh. You’re a conversationalist, are you?” She asks with a cheeky grin towards the 18 month old. She puts on the Disney playlist, on a low volume for background noise.

“Did your Mamas tell you the shi- crap I’ve been going through at work?” She waits a beat, Tris looks at her with big, bloodshot eyes, from her crying fit. 

“No? Okay, so let me just tell you. My boss,” she clears her throat and takes on a comedic Renaissance accent, “Executive Chef, Charles Pike, total idiot,” Lexa then resumes her regular speaking voice, “decided today that he was going to have a five course meal planned for the Water’s wedding tomorrow.” She scoffs.

Tris just babbles along while kicking her raccoon and eyeing Lexa suspiciously. 

“Exactly, that’s what I said. And then Pike has the gall to walk over to me and ask me to get it done by the end of the day, like I don’t already have 42 things on my plate. Because this man has made weaponized incompetence into a fuc-freaking art form.”

“Truck truck truck?” Tris all but screams at Lexa.

“You’re totally right, I should’ve told him to walk in front of a truck.”

"Truck, truck, TRUUUCK” Tris starts to wail.

“Truck? Where is the truck?” Lexa starts to rummage through her diaper bag. “Oh god, WHERE IS THE TRUCK?!”

In her panic, Lexa doesn’t realize that Clarke had emerged from her bedroom, and is currently walking towards Tris with a small yellow Tonka truck in her hands.

“Is this what you want, baby girl?” Clarke coos.

Lexa’s head snaps to attention and finds Clarke currently knelt next to her niece, shaking the truck slowly in front of her face. Tris has stopped crying, and currently has her full attention on Clarke’s hands.

“Clarke?” 

“Don’t mention it, I was just tired of hearing you talk about work.” Her roommate quips back, and then starts making vrooming truck noises to occupy the toddler.

“You don’t have to do this, Clarke. I am more than capable of-”

She’s cut off by Clarke, “Babysitting should be about more than just surviving, don’t we deserve better than that?”

Lexa gapes at her, unsure how to respond. 

“I might be a hypocrite, Lexa. But you’re a liar. You have no idea what you’re doing taking care of a baby.” Clarke jests with a raised eyebrow.

“I didn’t lie to everyone, not you.” She mumbles quietly.

“Well, if you care about me, and Tris, you’ll go make a bottle for her. I think she’s hungry.” Clarke retorts, a bit softer than she had been previously.