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[callmeblake]

Frank Iero, New York, NY, June 2019 (X)

Aug 29, 2019, 09:10am

Frank Iero May Just Be His Own Puppet Master

Photo Credit: Audrey Lew

Interview below the cut

Derek Scancarelli

Contributor

Hollywood & Entertainment

I am a music journalist living in New York City.

Frank Iero is breathing deeply and fighting off nausea. This isn’t uncommon for the 37-year-old guitarist and vocalist, given his predilection for debilitating anxiety. But on this occasion, it isn’t pre-show jitters.

“Oh my god, I hate this f*cking boat,” Iero says, as the docked vessel on which he sits knocks against a pier in the Lower East Side of Manhattan. Iero and his band, The Future Violents, just finished an intimate Saturday matinee show as fans sweat, sang and caught a glimpse of the Statue of Liberty.

It had been about 16 years since Iero and his now defunct band, My Chemical Romance (the band broke up in 2013), first performed on water. In July of 2002, the band released its debut album, I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love. In October of 2003, the soon-to-be emo heroes performed alongside New York Hardcore legends Sick Of It All at an aquatic gig booked by New Jersey college radio station WSOU. And in June of 2004, My Chemical Romance released Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, the band’s platinum-selling breakthrough record. In a matter of two years, Iero’s life changed dramatically.

In 2019, Iero still hasn’t found his sea legs, but a lot more has changed. He’s fathered three children, released three full-length solo records (including 2019’s Barriers), and survived a near-death experience. And as he gets older, he finds truth in life’s greatest clichés.

“Time flies, it just screams by,” Iero says. “You think you’re appreciating the time, but it’s easy to take it for granted. It’s a shame.”

But Iero is trying his hardest to pay attention to the little things, especially when it comes to family. He and his wife, Jamia, have three children together: nine-year-old twin daughters, Cherry and Lily, and a seven-year-old son named Miles.

“It’s wonderful to see them evolve and come into their own,” Iero says. “But it’s funny how personalities are innate. We shape the way they experience things or teach them the ropes, but for the most part, I’ve found that we are who we are when we’re born.”

From the start, Iero has seen an even split in the twins’ personalities. Cherry, he says, most behaves like her mother, whereas Lily possesses her father’s attitude.

“Some of the sh*t I hear coming out of my daughter's mouth,” Iero says laughing. “My God! It’s stuff I think but never say — they don't know to be ashamed yet! It's amazing and honest and pure. And I know exactly where she's coming from because I feel the same way.”

As part of fostering a relationship of trust and honesty, Iero has been age-appropriately transparent with his kids about the 2016 accident that almost killed him, his brother-in-law and guitarist Evan Nestor and his manager Paul Clegg.

While unloading gear from their van in Sydney, Australia, a city bus crashed into the group and their vehicle. In a 2017 interview with MTV, Iero recounted, in vivid detail, the moment he was dragged underneath the bumper of the bus, the screams of his brother-in-law, and the blood pooling from his manager.

Although Iero was able to walk into an ambulance carrying one of his friends, the scene was a spectacle overrun with emergency personnel — they even landed a rescue helicopter in nearby Hyde Park. Despite serious injuries, amazingly, there were no fatalities.

When Iero returned home from the hospital, he explained to his children that he was in a car accident, but that it was a singular freak incident.

“You don't want to lie,” he says. “They're getting older. Their friends and their parents are on the internet. They're asking questions. It does get back to them.”

Iero was as honest as possible, but avoided any gory details. He was also conscious that it wouldn’t be long before he would travel for work again — and he didn’t want to scare his kids any further.

Almost four years later, residual damage from the crash is impossible to ignore. Nestor has nerve damage in his leg that may never be corrected. Clegg’s leg and knee have undergone multiple surgeries, but are in poor shape. And Iero still has a tear in his shoulder that hurts every time he plays the guitar. Despite the pain, he’s afraid to undergo surgery.

“I was lucky enough to walk away and still play,” Iero says. “If I were to test fate again and go under the knife, if something were to go wrong… to let that be taken from me … no, I can't.”

On some days, the emotional toll of surviving such a traumatic accident weighs more heavily. Iero describes his recovery as non-linear: some days he feels collected and in control, other days the memory rushes back into his mind.

After his new band finished recording Barriers, Iero and his team went back to Australia for appointments pertaining to the accident and corresponding litigation. As soon as he exited the plane, Iero felt like he’d returned to the horrific scene. For the following week, he was barraged by an unending state of panic.

“You go through these instances of PTSD,” he says. “You never know what's going to trigger and send you all the way back to the beginning with recovery.”

Iero greatly underestimated how difficult his return to Australia would be. When navigating to a doctor’s office near where the accident occurred, he couldn’t bring himself to walk down the street. And suddenly, he felt surrounded by buses.

“I don't know if this is true,” he says. “But it felt like every other car on the street was one of these f*cking buses. They were everywhere. It was frightening. I couldn't do anything. I was shaking like a leaf.”

Despite the traumatic flashbacks, Iero continues to reflect on that day. In the promotional run for Barriers, he discussed the accident at length. And on the record itself, he addresses the complicated ripple effect it’s had on his entire sense of self.

“I don't think it needs to define me,” Iero says. “But it was something I needed to talk about on this record. It's not something I could sweep under the rug. But do I want to dwell on it every day and relive it? No. But I think about it constantly. I feel the pain constantly. It's on my mind.”

In recent interviews, Iero has tended to frame a few philosophical takeaways from his ordeal. In simple terms, the first idea is that he’s found a new lease on life — that everything happens for a reason and he’s been given an opportunity to seize the day. The second philosophy is much darker, a sort of survivor’s guilt compounded with fear and existential dread. The third and most abstract consideration is closest to Simulation Theory — where Iero has the ability to control his own artificial timeline.

Sometimes, Iero questions if actually died that day. He wonders: Is this all real?

“It’s hard. No one can tell you what to believe,” he says. “But you come to this realization, ‘Well, this is real to me, the hand I was dealt, so I have to make the best of it!’”

Through the acceptance of uncertainty, Iero surmises that he just may be his own puppet master.

“If this is a figment of my imagination,” Iero says. “If this is all in my head, then I am the master of my own destiny. If I want to do something, I can manufacture it. And if it's not the case, then at least it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Maybe putting positive vibes out into the universe is beneficial. If we didn't make it and we're just going through this weird labyrinth in my mind, I can do anything I want.”

And lately, he’s been doing just that. Call it sorcery or the power of positive thinking, but Iero is motivated. For Barriers, he was able to assemble a dream band, The Future Violents (different lineups of his backing band have previously gone by The Cellabration and The Patience), featuring his brother-in-law Nestor on guitar, Thursday’s Tucker Rule on drums, Murder by Death’s Matt Armstrong on bass, and Kayleigh Goldsworthy on keyboard.

The theme of the album — and his own internal dialogue — mostly relates to tragedy and timing. Did the universe have a course set out for him? Or was he just some random victim?

“The crazy thing is that you didn't do anything wrong,” Iero says of the accident. “Yet, all of this stuff was taken from you and you have to make these decisions. You get angry a lot.”

He continues: “These random, abrupt, violent actions. Do they happen to us? Or for us? I wouldn't have been able to make this record if it didn't happen. And it made me realize a lot of things about myself. Am I happy it happened? No. But I'm happy where I am right now.”

Iero views Barriers as an exercise in vulnerability. If the aftermath of his accident taught him anything, it’s that success was meaningless to his character, but adversity helped him grow. For the first time, addressing childhood trauma helped Iero expose himself in a way that felt freeing.

“When you put something to song, it gives that memory weight,” Iero explains. “If you never talk about it, it's almost like it didn't happen. There's a fine line between relinquishing that power to this memory, situation or trauma, or holding that power over it and creating your own narrative from it.”

Barriers also intertwines Iero’s childhood experiences with his current perspective as a father. This go around, he felt comfortable writing about his parents’ divorce — the couple split when he was three and divorced when he was seven.

He looks back on the unpleasantness of the process and his consequential understanding of his mother’s issues with addiction, depression and mental illness. On his 2016 record, Parachutes, Iero first referenced his mother’s struggles and his own liability to inherit her traits. He’s still horrified by the idea of predeterminism.

“When you're a young kid being surrounded with it, it doesn't feel right,” Iero says. “You're not happy. You're scared. You're constantly concerned for your parent. It’s almost as if you become the caregiver.”

He continues: “Then you see yourself falling into these patterns that you were witness to and maybe in a roundabout way were taught. That addiction, that depression, runs through you. It's easy to fall off that cliff. I don't want that for my kids and I need to stop this cycle. Like this sh*t stops with me. Whether it be I get okay, or I f*cking turn my lights out.”

It’s this sort of tongue-in-cheek use of concerning language that keeps Iero’s fanbase enthralled, yet somewhat on edge. Take for example, in the comment section for his video “Young & Doomed,” some diehard fans are troubled by his repeated use of the words “hurt myself again.” While he’s surprised to hear about the response, he counters that the record is ultimately meant to feel uplifting and positive, even if addressing dark topics.

“I don't think that we should strive for perfection,” Iero says. “This idea that we should all have this perfect life and be pretty and purse our lips to post a picture on social media is bullsh*t. The things that make us unique are important.”

He continues: “Sometimes we're our own worst enemies and we hurt ourselves. Those scars, though, are important. They're beautiful. ‘Young And Doomed’ is a call to arms to celebrate the things people think are wrong with us.”

Now, Iero just hopes his story and music inspire fans to try, fail and try again.

“You don't find out who you are unless you get a scar and get hurt,” Iero says. “You should be hurt, hurt other people, and learn that it feels terrible to hurt someone else. You should feel sorry for it and make amends for it. These are important lessons to be a better person. You find out who you truly are by attacking things that scare you the most.”

Frank Iero is currently touring Europe with Laura Jane Grace & The Devouring Mothers.

[quakerjoe]

You do realize that one of two people will be the President of the United States on January 20, 2021–yes? Either the incumbent or the Democratic nominee will hold the office, and that’s a legacy as old as Jefferson and Hamilton. If you can not stop trashing both aspirants to the office may I suggest that you pursue the acquisition of a passport as well as some means of leaving the country? Your laments are so doleful as to finally become comedy.

You know what’s really funny? Everything about YOU. I’ll tell you why, since you bothered to ask. I at least owe you that much since you didn’t ask anon.

I get this sort of banter every now and again so I thought I’d display it and answer the question at hand.

First off, this “#Murica, love it or leave it!” horseshit has two facets to it in response.

ONE: “Go fuck yourself. If you’re so willing to lie down and take it in the ass for one of the parties constantly screwing you, you’re pretty useless. Why don’t YOU leave since you’ve clearly given up the fight? “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness” comes at a price, sometimes a high one, and you have to FIGHT for it. If you’re willing to just bend over and take an elbow deep fist in your ass from the Democrats so it can jerk off the GOP while its dick is constantly forced down your throat, then perhaps YOU are the one who needs to pack up and fuck off to Saudi Arabia or North Korea. Maybe Russia or China are more your speed.

 TWO: Are YOU going to pay my way if I decide to give up on America and abandon my home and the nation that I love? I may not love your precious politicians, but I’m still proud to be an American. I served, am a vet, but THIS is not the nation I signed up to defend. This era of US history is the Big Sellout, and you, dumbass, are a part of that.

 You people had chances and opportunities to make this a better place than when you found it, but over the five decades I’ve been alive all I’ve seen is people fighting to get in line to buy the government snake oil like it’s a Cabbage Patch Kid or the new iPhone. It’s pathetic how much the US lacks vision or has any real pride or dignity worth talking about. We’re not #1 at fuck-all anything worth bragging about unless it’s how bad the education system has gotten or that we’re the TOP nation in the world for incarcerated citizens per capita and it’s mostly geared towards men who happen to have a dark complexion.

 The rich and powerful exist here because WE ALLOW it. People  like you, you defunct Fox “News” fan, are either a cheering fan for the status quo of yesteryear with Biden who wants to turn back the calendar to a time that BROUGHT US TRUMP in the first place OR you’re a trump fan who has NO IDEA… well, no ideas or thoughts about anything. Trump’s shown us who we really as a nation apparently- deluded, self-centered, selfish assholes, and the WORLD can see it. Not all of us, granted, but as a generalization, we truly suck. Such a waste of enormous potential, especially given all the resources we’ve had over the years.

 As a result, we’re being overwhelmed by a virus that’s killing us by the thousands and perhaps millions some day. But, since we no longer believe in or do science anymore, nothing much is coming to save us. If/When the time comes that its run its course and should we find a vaccine, there are still anti-vaxxers who’d rather die than take a cure. Then there are the religious zealots who think Jesus will protect them. You know; the ones who are dropping like flies these days? Those assholes; the hypocrites who think they’re part of ‘the faithful’ who, if you believe in that sort of thing, do Satan’s bidding more than Jesus’.

 If you’re not boiling mad at the GOP for literally doing everything they can to go out of their way to keep the US a hateful, racist, peddler of death nation bent on keeping its citizens poor and undereducated, you’re not a part of the solution. If your fucked-up solution is to have those not happy with the butt-hurt they peddle move to another country, it shows you’ve got no pride or respect for your country or yourself. You’re weak, ignorant, selfish and stupid all rolled into a big burrito of go fuck yourself.

If you’re not making a fist so tight that your nails are digging into your palms when you hear that the Democrats are literally forcing us to choose one racist sexual predator that can’t hold a thought or form sentences as the “champion” to replace the incumbent one, you’re DEFINITELY not a part of the solution. Also, you’re an idiot, an asshole, and totally a Biden Bro.

 What will it take for YOU to open your window and shout out “I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore!” eh? You people rolling over for Biden are pathetic weaklings who sold out women and #MeToo and sold your souls to #MeTooExceptBiden, allowing the bar to be set to the same, low, cesspool standard that the GOP glorifies in. You sold out party, country, woman, minorities, and everything that was once even remotely good about the party that allegedly represented the working class so that the party leaders can keep their cash flow from Big Pharma, the Insurance lobby, Big Oil and the Military Industrial Complex. You’ve turned the Democratic party into yesterdays feckless, weak and worthless GOP while the current GOP drags the country even FURTHER to the fucking right. You’re aiding and abetting the foulest elements of the nation’s existence.

Your attitude has cost us our place on the world stage and most of our allies while we crawl under the covers with bedfellows we once considered enemies because they treat their people like shit. Now WE are one of those shithole countries you people used to rant about… AND YOU’RE PROUD OF IT and unwilling to stand up and fix it. Instead, you prefer those who are willing to do your job FOR you to just move elsewhere. Loser. Listen, if you’re too much of a wuss to stand up to the establishment that’s using your tax dollars to bail out the rich while pissing table scraps down upon you, that’s on you. You’re too stupid to know better. I get it. But until YOU get off YOUR ASS and hold your government accountable, you’ve got no room to criticize those who ARE doing it.

We’re in the middle of a pandemic and the ONE GUY who has been fighting for his decades-long career for UNIVERSAL health care was someone YOU opted out. American apparently hasn’t suffered enough to grow a pair of whatever motivates it to stand up to the wealth inequality. The US idolizes the rich and instead of fighting for a chance to live at least a DECENT life without having to worry about going tits-up and pear-shape because of hospital bills or job losses, they’d rather just piss away their fortunes and futures so that people with more money than they can spend in a lifetime of ten could possibly spend, all while THEY pay little to ZERO taxes, leaving YOU stuck with the bill. That’s on YOU if you’re willing to bend over and just take it in the ass and take it dry; no kiss, no lube, not so much as a feel-around. That’s YOU.

You, sir, are the problem. Clearly, with people like you, the US is simply BEGGING for 4 more years of trumplefuckery. Perhaps you even deserve it. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but who am I? I’m just one of the few willing to call anyone out on their bullshit, from the GOP overall to Pelosi’s feckless approach, to Schumer’s “kid who gets beaten on the schoolyard daily” approach to trying to appear useful. I’ll shit on Liz Warren for not backing a Progressive approach and getting behind Sanders EARLY; screwing her friend and ally AGAIN like in 2016. I’ll call out all the other “candidates” who say one thing while their track records show that they’re pretty full of shit. I’ll DEMAND that we have a party that’s transparent and willing to fight to drag us BACK to the Left instead of the “oh, let’s settle for plutocracy and oligarchy because it’s better than fascism” route. Fuck that, fuck them, and of course fuck you too. Thought I forgot about you? Oh, this is all about you, you spineless goon.

 So let me know if you and your ilk are willing to throw your precious few dollars into a GO FUND ME to finance my move to another country. This includes my family, all our belongings, and of course a home once we get there. Naturally, you’ll be finding us ALL gainful employment there and the costs for the passports, visas, and whatnot and you’ll of course be lining us ALL up with jobs. I’ve got a big family, so it’s going to be pretty goddamn expensive. Shit, just ME moving is going to cost more than you’d be willing to cough up.

 In the mean time, I’m going to remain here, giving the finger to the GOP, the Establishment/Corporate owned Democrats, and people like you. Seriously, you’re an idiot.

@ imall4frogs He’s talking about people like YOU.

[truthbeetoldmedia]

The Toxicity of Kylo Ren and Reylo 

It’s no secret that the newest villain of the Star Wars franchise, Kylo Ren, is a polarizing figure. In fact, there’s a large fanbase that don’t think of him as a villain at all (despite confirmation from cast and crew). If you take issue with that statement, look at the marketing: it’s Rey, Finn, and Poe at the center of the franchise. Not Kylo. Instead, he’s framed as a misunderstood underdog that is undeserving of the criticism he faces.

Now, that’s not to say that Kylo Ren can’t be appreciated as a character. It’s completely possible to appreciate him as a character and not as a person — after all, thinking someone is interesting or well-written isn't an endorsement of their behavior, or a claim that they deserve the benefit of the doubt.

People can be drawn to characters for all sorts of reasons. A lot of people enjoy rooting for the villain simply because they’re a villain. You can appreciate a character's potential, or their personality. It could even be as simple as thinking Adam Driver is good looking, or appreciating his portrayal of Kylo, with that being the reasoning for being drawn to that character. 

Despite all of this, there’s an interesting (and troubling) phenomenon happening with people who have decided to “stan” Kylo Ren — not his potential as a villain, or because Adam Driver is talented, but the character himself, so much so that there is a fundamental misunderstanding (or willful ignorance) of his actions and motivations. 

I’m not apprehensive to call this kind of fanservice toxic, because that’s what it is. There’s something really unnerving about stanning someone who has commited genocide, runs labor camps, and has direct, not-at-all subtle parallels to Nazism. 

Ignoring Canon

The main theme here is that Kylo is somehow “misunderstood,” and not only that, but deserving of a full redemption (and a girlfriend in the form of Rey, but I’ll get to that in a bit). The narrative and what we know about Kylo in canon is a stark contrast to how fandom sees him. There’s this image of him as a down on his luck, unloved, victimized person who has been wronged by the people in his life, which simply isn’t true. 

Kylo is the ultimate example of privilege. He arguably has the coolest parents in the world in the form of Han and Leia. He was, at the time of his turn to the dark side, being taught by Luke Skywalker (his uncle). From the get go, he had the support and resources that we rarely see someone have in the Star Wars universe. 

And for those who like to counter with the argument that Han left Leia and is somehow a deadbeat dad — he did so after Kylo killed the entire group of Jedis Luke was instructing and abandoned his family willingly. You can dislike that decision all you’d like, but it had no bearing on Kylo’s turn to the dark side. 

A more fitting criticism would be towards Luke, who admitted that he sensed something disturbing in his nephew and briefly thought about killing him. I’ll admit that this is fair enough, but for Kylo to react with murdering numerous Jedi students and then immediately joining the space fascists? I’d say this side of him has been lurking under the surface for a while. 

Also consider — was Luke wrong? Dude literally built a device specifically to commit genocide. 

This romanticization of a hard life that never existed is even more disturbing when you consider that there’s another character whose backstory fits this narrative: Finn. 

Finn’s storyline is what certain fans desperately want Kylo’s to be. Finn was kidnapped at a very young age, forced to become a stormtrooper and was embedded in the hateful doctrine that Kylo is such a fan of. Despite being raised in that toxic environment and being indoctrinated with propaganda from such a young age, Finn — of his own volition, before he met Rey or Poe or anyone else — made the decision to resist and break free of the Empire. 

He did this because he felt it was morally correct, at great risk to himself and his well being. He’s been in that environment for his entire life, so he knows exactly what happens to traitors. Despite all of this, he does it anyway. 

Unwanted and Unearned Redemption

There’s also this strange need to advocate for Kylo’s redemption, something that is very clear he doesn’t deserve or want. 

I’ve noticed a lot of fans who are desperate for his redemption call him Ben — his given name — which is both hilarious to me and makes no sense. He literally chose to change his name to Kylo Ren. He doesn't want to be Ben anymore, and he’s made that very clear. 

Leia and Han clearly wanted him to abandon his position in the First Order and come home during The Force Awakens. During his showdown with Han towards the end of the film he’s given a shot at redemption, which he rejects violently by murdering his own father. After this happened it was speculated that this was a sacrifice Kylo had to make to rise up in the First Order, or to prove to Snoke his loyalty to infiltrate the First Order better and ultimately turn against it. 

This was pretty easily disproven in The Last Jedi when he also attempts to kill his mother, Leia, who barely manages to survive. At the end of that same film, he’s also responsible for the death of the definitive hero of the franchise, Luke Skywalker. 

If the theory about Kylo proving himself to Snoke was true, the tendency to murder his own family (and consequently the people offering him redemption after all he’s done) would have ended with Han.

After all of this, he’s given yet another chance to redeem himself, this time by Rey. He turns down this opportunity like he did the others. 

As mentioned before, even without his violence towards those who want to help him, his actions are enough to completely eliminate the possibility of redemption. He’s overseen and advocated for genocide. He’s a member of an actual fascist organization. At this point, there’s no plausible way that he could be redeemed, nor should he be. 

Romanticizing Abuse 

This leads me to the discussion surrounding Rey and Kylo, or “Reylo,” an incredibly convoluted and twisted way to look at romance. 

Reylo fans desperately need Rey to be the one to “save” Kylo, a textbook example of an abusive and toxic relationship. This is the Star Wars version of “She can change him,” making Rey the bearer of Kylo’s emotional labor when he has no interest in changing at all. 

It’s not Rey’s responsibility to bring about his redemption. A true redemption needs to happen organically, of his own volition, and not because he’ll get rewarded with a girlfriend if he does. And, let’s be honest, it’s not a realistic expectation. If he only changes for Rey and not because he realizes that genocide is morally wrong, that’s profoundly disturbing and also selfish. 

Here’s some advice: if someone says they’ve changed only for you and because of their love for you, that’s a red flag. They aren’t changing for reasons that are morally correct, or for anyone’s benefit; they’re changing because their feelings and their feelings alone matter. If Kylo changes because he loves Rey, that is a self serving act for his benefit only. 

Further, what happened to Kylo torturing Rey in The Force Awakens? He kidnapped her, holding her captive, and entered her mind without consent. That’s as clear a metaphor for abuse you can find, and that’s not even my only example. 

In The Last Jedi, Kylo attempts to persuade Rey to join him on the dark side. He tells her that she’s “nothing,” but not to him. To him, she matters. This is very commonly touted as a romantic moment, but the emotional manipulation is more than obvious. 

Kylo doesn’t care about Rey. He says she’s “nothing,” that none of her friends care about her, that she’s worthless to them. By tearing her down then building her up by saying that she’s not nothing to him, he’s enforcing the idea that the only way she can have significance is with him. 

I don’t even mean “with him” in the romantic sense — he pretty transparently only wants her on the dark side for her power. Kylo is a terrible jedi, and he’s witnessed Rey’s prowess a number of times. He only wants her power and skill, not her as a person. 

He murdered her father figure, Han, in front of her, and nearly killed her best friend, Finn; he’s tortured her and manipulated her — it’s never been more obvious that he doesn’t care about her at all. 

If anyone knows anything about abusive relationships, this is the first thing that abusers do. They alienate their intended victim from their friends and family, ensuring that they alone are the only source of comfort. It ensures that if things ever get bad, the victim has nowhere to go and no one to turn to but right back to the abuser. 

What message would it send to little girls and boys if Rey were to end up with Kylo after all of that? Deal with his violence and manipulation long enough and he might change? If I have to spell out why that’s dangerous, I don’t know what else to say. 

In addition — what does this say about how people view Rey? Do you really want her to be with someone who has tortured her, betrayed her, and manipulated her? The answer is that people who want Reylo to be together only care about Kylo, not Rey. 

Toxic Masculinity 

Despite these specifics, the general acceptance of Kylo’s behavior is surprisingly rampant in fandom. His actions aren’t simply excused, but romanticized. He has obvious anger issues, control issues — that scene in the beginning of The Force Awakens when he lashes out and destroys the control panel with his lightsaber? That may as well have been a shot of an abusive, angry man throwing around furniture and punching walls because he has no emotional control. 

Sure, people like Kylo. They’re allowed to. But there’s a clear difference between liking a character and blind endorsement of that character's actions. I know plenty of people who like Kylo as a character, but the difference is if they meet someone like Kylo in bar or see one of his outbursts, you’d call the fucking cops. You wouldn’t ship him with your best friend. That's the dividing line here.

Kylo Ren is a direct parallel to real-world men who lash out because they’re filled with anger and frustration that’s turned into something truly ugly. They lash out at the people who are willing to help, all because they feel themselves robbed of things they think they deserve. Kylo wants power, he wants control, and he cares about nothing else. 

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker hits theatres internationally on December 19, 2019.

[lunelantern]

~Sasusaku analysis ~

                               ~~ Sasuke and Sakura - - pair analysis ~~                                            ~THE BRIDGE SCENE~                            (Team 7 Reunion - - after the Five Kage Summit)

                                           ---   PART 4---

How would anyone act when given an impossible choice: be a shinobi or a lover.

This scene suggests that one can't be both (Zabuza states that they can't be both and the human wins every time, albeit Naruto begs to differ and state that it is realistic and achievable to balance the two antithetical perspectives).

"Kill her and I'll accept your offer." Sasuke gives her a pill of her own medicine. Because he doesn't speak randomly for the sake of conversation, cruelly with seemingly no remorse lingering in his heart, Sasuke gives Sakura one example of how her life would be if she were to join him; the life of an outlaw where murder and disposing of people like nothing would be ordinary.

Plus, the scene is also symbolic; Sasuke asks a famous medic - - his following sentence is more than revealing for he knows very well that Sakura is a medic - - to kill a suffering person, when the very essence of her jobs nature AND her symbolism in the manga as the representative of rebirth and regeneration  is to heal, to cure, to lessen one's pain.

By joining him, Sakura would give up on her own self (Naruto answers to her shrouded confession that no sentient bring should event lose himself and betray his own morals, principles and feelings "I hate people who lie to themselves"). Hypothetically, Sasuke shows Sakura a glimpse into how her future beside him would look like.

Albeit is kosher and nuanced, barely noticeable, Sasuke still has a good nature and he proves he cares; he doesn't snap at her, he doesn't launch an attack, he takes his time to lecture her in his own blunt and sarcastic manner.

In the light of the most recent events - - Itachi’s death, the Kage summit, Danzo, Obito and his confession about Uchiha - - Sasuke might arguably have his ration altered, with interlaced moments of lucidity and madness, triggered by the emotional trauma, extreme stress and because he is being provoked. And that makes his moves seem mad, unusually erratic and exaggerated (his famous mad  laughing moment when he shouts to Kakashi that no one could ever bring his family back and restore that status quo - - a doctrine that the manga embraces).

But that's not the case; not with Sasuke and not in this scene.

The overly popular consent postulates that "Sasuke went mad/ he is crazy". Which isn't the truth at all, but it's so facile to superficially judge a character with no proper introspection.

He is not mad at all. Nothing in his demeanor reveal that Sasuke lost the clarity or the ration and his furious state must not be mistaken for insanity.

Sasuke is perfectly lucid. He's, calm, composed, enigmatic, his words have double meaning, he is coherent, analytical, tactical and he knows perfectly well what he is saying; he has complete control of his thoughts.

The fact that his following  conversation with Team 7 steals exacerbated reactions from him is due to the fact that he's more emotionally attached to them and thus his emotions would be pushed to extreme; he'd be more expressive and his rage would be more evident.

Sasuke is less reserved with Team 7 because he's emotionally involved; it’s very personal. But that doesn't make him a mentally deranged man.

He even kept his lucidity and perfectly placated Danzo with a sparkling strategy; he had enough lucidity to analyze Danzo's attacks and outsmart him, despite the emotional trump card of psychological upper hand that Danzo supposingly had on him. Even Obito himself thought at some point that Sasuke has lost it and he's only launching at Danzo erratically, aimlessly in his crazed mind, like Juugo. But it wasn't the suicidal rampage of a crazed man. Sasuke fooled everyone into thinking that he does not know what he is doing / that he lost it.

Nowhere in his attitude or his manner of speaking does Sasuke seem crazy and that's luckily to Sakura because she exposed herself to a ridiculously deadly situation. She came before him like it's a cakewalk with a confusing and conflicting strategy - - if it even existed.

That's the beauty of this pair. It's refreshing and novel, the dynamics are exciting, it lefts the reader constantly guessing and the finale isn't predictable. They aren't a cliché couple. Their movements, the inner feelings, the evident indecision and introspective turmoil is fabulous.

Sakura's ambiguous intentions and Sasuke's personal manner of speaking, his body language, her evident conflict and bedraggled approach are confusing and enigmatic. We keep in guessing what did she hope to accomplish?

Her presence alone holding a lethal weapon that she plans to use on Sasuke and the mention of the word "kill" on her lips when talking about Sasuke the man she loves might be symbolic for how much she treasures the bond with Naruto and how much she regrets for her innocent, naïve plea to bring Sasuke back.

A bond of blood, pain, rancor and emotional torment that she created, a harpoon of tm emotional trauma and torture for Naruto who didn't deserve it. Her present alone with murder intent is an attempt to free Naruto her best friend from this curse (a repentine decision taken after her "confession" failed - - her attempt to free Naruto from that promise failed because Naruto suggests that the supposed burden of her promise was also a conjoined personal motivation).

And maybe Sakura wants to confirm her own feelings and proceed from there: does she love him now when he's gone to this lengths or did her feelings changed for this new Sasuke and she'll be able to fulfill her shinobi duty?

That's how her disarrayed moves and the lack of any proper prior plan could be explained. She wanted to confront her own emotions and the best way to do so was to meet Sasuke herself and assess the situation with her own eyes and her suspicions coupled with the rumors about him lead to the verdict: he is not the same Sasuke that she fell in love with.

Solidifying Sasuke's role as a character with great development in the Manga (a Bildungsroman which follows the evolution of a character from childhood to adulthood, which emphasizes and supports the moral of the story). In antithesis with Naruto who is a linear character who didn't change in the bit, Uchiha is a dynamic character who evolves and never stays the same.

Both Sakura and Karin make it perfectly clear that Sasuke is not static like an unperturbed lake with no ripple to break the mirror-like stillness of its surface. He's a vivacious ocean - - unpredictable and fulminant with constant vicissitudes between tranquility and serenity and turbulent storms.

Sakura confronts her own feelings by approaching Sasuke and realization almost costs her life - - her heart gives us the painful confirmation that she loves him, still helplessly loves him ardently, in a moment when there's no safe turning back.

A moment of hesitation is lethal for a shinobi. A moment of indecision or unfortunate choice comes with devastating consequences.

She reveals her poisoned kunai from under her clothes while indecision takes control over her reeling emotions and fogged lucidity. Simultaneously, Sasuke prepares his Chidori and prepares to strike his attack.

The manga is very descriptive and suggestive. The transitions denote melodious cursively and the flow and cohesion of their interplay is assured by the constant introspection into the characters minds and hearts as the silent face expressions and body language emphasize their dialogue.

Sasuke sees Sakura's internal turmoil. He notices how she reviews her own feelings for he did the same when he heard the truth about Itachi. She's analyzing her feelings for him as he silently allow her to make a decision, up to the very last moment - - he wait for her to get close to him while he won't let any other enemy with murder intent to get so close to him.

Waiting for her to decide, to make up her mind, to choose the road to take and dictate the course of action. Up to the last moment when she reveals her kunai and her mind decides that "she doesn't matter", meaning that she won't comply with his request to kill Karin and "prove" her loyalty and feelings to him.

The implicit dubiety in Sasuke's voice has a moral purpose behind: in a couple, trust is fundamental for a healthy relationship. Love isn't enough when it’s not coupled with trust and respect.

When trust misses, there can't be any romance between two parties and that's what Sasuke's ironic and daring words mean when he dares Sakura to prove her loyalties and back up her confession.

Yes, she might love him but she won't do everything he asks and she does not NEED to comply to his requests. Sasuke tells Sakura that she does not BELONG to his world now. To this version of reality, according to the script of this play he can't be her lover, the one she dreams of.

His eyes, the mirrors of the soul as the symbols of the Third Eye in Buddhism - - the omnipotence of the one who beholds all the wisdom and knowledge / the spiritual part represented by Sasuke's Yin avatar - - are always scrutinizing and introspective. Sasuke is following Sakura's mimics, gesture and reactions with hawkish diligence, attentive and meticulous.

He sees right through her deception; he might not have accumulated enough life-experience, wisdom and information to unravel Itachi's truth ("how far can you see with that Sharingan of yours, Sasuke?"), but he sees right through Sakura's soul, reading her like an open book, every page and every line. She's transparent in front of the man she loves.

It can't be any different because romantic bonds are unique; nothing can begin to compare or come close to. There's nothing else tangible to compare romantic love with, nothing that can offer such a complete body and soul experience.

It's very difficult to draw a kokeshi doll mask on the face of a lover because primal instinct makes one react differently, in a peculiar manner in the presence of the loved one.

Is primal, animal instinct to entice and attract the attention of a potential match and thus it makes it difficult to fight against such strong innate reflexes.

For both Sasuke and Sakura, the primeval instinct to be a couple is very difficult to placate and hide. Sasuke makes it obvious from his tempered gestures, for how he allows her closer to him than anyone, and from he way he talks to her - - the syntax of the phrase and the choice of words are all very intimate, very personal.

And Sakura's pendulating actions shine with confusion and indecision, the inner turmoil revealing as theatrical and dramatic: she alternates between blubbing and shouting, rasping and barking at him and getting emotional and mellower with him.

The look in their eyes is one of this pair’s most symbolic feature. Since Japanese people aren't overtly extroverts with displaying emotions in public, subtlety is the key of this representative pair. There is an entire repertoire that composed the aria of love songs between this pair. There are heated glances, angst stares, incredulity and confusion. This time Sakura does not eschew her eyes from Sasuke; she doesn't glance shyly and flirtatiously aside from him like she does at the end of the manga. She holds Sasuke's gaze, leveling his piercing gaze as she knows she risks a lot because this man's eyes can see through everything.

He... Was always capable to see right through her deception. She can never hide from him.

Sasuke instead can perfectly mask his emotions, but chooses not to.

Considering how this couple's love story is embroidered into the tapestry of scorching passion, it’s no wonder that Sasuke is the one who initiates most the innuendos between them. No pronouns are more idoneous than the repetitive "Me" and "you" and the syntax of their dialogue; the flow of the conversation, the order of the words and the feelings elicited are extremely intimate.

There is history behind this couple and their now earmark stares and glances exchange support it.

Sasuke and Sakura are subtle but their body language is unique and a expressive. No fustian description can give their story justice, for it's far too complex.

That's why passion and intimacy scorch like a pyre with this pair. Every feeling, every emotion and every sentiment is augmented and exacerbated.

While he's clearly deranged by the women's litany of flirts and attempts to seduce him, he listens to Sakura's every word. He doesn't brush off her confession, he doesn't ask her to keep her distance from him, and he doesn't repay her confession with brusque scowls or growls (like he does to Karin, Ino and Mei).

Sasuke and Sakura's love story is very reminiscent to the compelling elements of Shakespeare drama in terms of its characteristic elements: the tragic hero who's suffering is the product of a peculiar  trait of fate or an extraneous force (the Uchiha curse/ manipulation and lies that surround HIM); his inner struggle (the struggle between good or bad), darkness and hatred and evil  that destroys any iota of goodness in the hero's heart, the stupendous internal and external conflict and the effect of catharsis that their feelings produce.

The strong, Naruto-esque happy ending is the only thing that differs, as Sasuke and Sakura don't end in a veritable tragedy, emphasizing the triumph of good in the manga.

I'd end by citing Obito and Hagoromo's hermeneutics:   "When a man learns how to love he must shoulder the burden of hatred."

The negativism and pessimism that attributes a negative connotation to life and suggests that pain and suffering are inherent to life and win over positive emotions - - the reign of pain and suffering.

... In conjunction with:

"I hope that this time is hatred which turns into love."

The positive overview of the humanist manga conclusion.

The positive, idealist triumph of peace, love and happiness, with love winning over pain.

It's Sakura who returned the lost peace and gave Sasuke happiness. It's her love that turned his hatred (Sasuke set on redemption journey because of lingering Uchiha demons he's scared to hurt people).

[little-leech-boy]

So, Unus and Annus are reaching the last hour of existence, and they said that if we want, we could write our last words to them and our aspirations, and.... I wanna do it

I'm taking this stupidly seriously but this, this channel became important to me, it made me expand my thoughts on what I thought death was to me and what my life is to me

But here we go

I haven't been here for the beginning, I didnt watch every video and I never bought merch, but regardless this channel and these videos worked there way into my thoughts, and this livestream made me stupid sentimental. My internet currently is shitting itself and I might not see the end properly, but that's ok.

Death to me, is the end

That's it, I dont know if there is an after and I dont care, I dont fear the emotions and pain I might feel facing my demise but I do fear one thing. I fear of what my death will do to the world i leave behind.

Will it change? Will it mourn? Will it rejoice??? Or will absolutely nothing happen, and time keeps moving forward as it does. More importantly however, how would the people I love remember me? After death I will be gone and over, there wont be anything left of me besides the legacy I have left and the memory people hold of me, so I cant help but think of the only thing I CAN think of involving my demise. But this is egotistical of me is it not? Death is normal, and I am not special for thinking this way, I am going to die and so will you guys. But in all honesty I cannot think of any other way to perceive my death, I cannot for the life of me think of anything else to say about it.

That's also ok, I'm alive

I'll never understand my death as long as I live.

But I obsess so much, about what will happen after I die, but I try not to think about what will happen as I continue to live.

I am young, and I am childish, I am naive and I am hopeful.

I only really truly desire one thing in my life more than anything, even if it may change over time.

I want to make a story I love, and characters whom can share my thoughts and feelings, in their own unique experiences, and become their own people from them as well. I want to create art that would do them justice and I want to love it so, so, so much

I know I dont draw as much as want, I should not force myself to per say, but I find it difficult to find motive to.

At this moment that is my only goal in my life, I just want to love what I create

I will one day

Even if I may die before I create such a story, I will love my art, I do love it now

I love it because I CREATED it

I made it, I birthed something simply because I wanted to, because its fun

And I really, really wish I could see that everyday.

But I do not, and that's ok, that's ok

Its ok

This channel taught me to, learn what it is that I value about my life and my death, and because I overthink MANY things this was not always a good thing lol

It will die soon, and that's ok

But that does not mean I will not feel, grief

No matter how much or little that grief may be.

So what shall I do? When it does? When it dies 20 minutes from now as I'm writing this?

Well I'll cry

I'll cry, and cry and cry

Because it is what I can do

.

I don't know what my life will be like, I cant find the words to describe what I think of it as, as of writing this at least.

But

But I

I want to live

I AM living

I AM ALIVE

and I'm so glad that I am, I used to think living was a burden, I used to hate that fact

But I'm still here, I'm still breathing and I'm so

I'm so relieved, that I chose to stay alive.

And I hope that those who are reading this feel that too, maybe not today or tomorrow, but soon.

Soon.

Because it is, such an amazing thing to be here, with you, and with my family and friends, and with strangers I'll never meet

..

This has gone in a while

This is clearly important to me so I wanted to be transparent in my feelings. I dont know how u all will react to this and I dont know if you will care.

But that's okay, you dont need to take anything from this.

Well

Except for one thing.

Momento Mori, Remember Death

Remember Life

Unus Annus

Thank you so much for reading my rambles about my existence, thank you so much

I'm glad you are alive reading this as well

I'm glad we exist :)

[isslibrary]

New Library Material December 2019 - April 2020

Bibliography

Sorted by Call Number / Author.

155.9 T

Turkle, Sherry. Life on the screen : identity in the age of the Internet. New York, NY : Simon & Schuster, c. 1995. Introduction : identity in the age of the Internet -- pt. 1. The seductions of the interface -- A tale of two aesthetics -- The triumph of tinkering -- pt. 2. Of dreams and beasts -- Making a pass at a robot -- Taking things at interface value -- The quality of emergence -- Artificial life as the new frontier -- pt. 3. On the Internet -- Aspects of the self -- TinySex and gender trouble -- Virtuality and its discontents -- Identity crisis.

230 L

Lewis, C. S. (Clive Staples), 1898-1963, author. The C.S. Lewis signature classics. First Harpercollins Paperback Edition published 2001. Set contains 8 vols: 1)Mere Christianity; 2)The Screwtape Letters; 3)Miracles; 4)A Grief Observed; 5)The Great Divorce; 6)The Problem of Pain; 7)The Abolition of Man; 8)The Four Loves.

302 G

Gladwell, Malcolm, 1963- author. Talking to strangers : what we should know about the people we don't know. First edition. Introduction : "Step out of the car!" -- Part I. Spies and diplomats : two puzzles. Fidel Castro's revenge ; Getting to know der Führer -- Part II. Default to truth. The queen of Cuba ; The holy fool ; Case study : The boy in the shower -- Part III. Transparency. The Friends fallacy ; A (short) explanation of the Amanda Knox case ; Case study : The fraternity party -- Part IV. Lessons. KSM : what happens when the stranger is a terrorist? -- Part V. Coupling. Sylvia Plath ; Case study : The Kansas City experiments ; Sandra Bland. In this thoughtful treatise spurred by the 2015 death of African-American academic Sandra Bland in jail after a traffic stop, New Yorker writer Gladwell (The Tipping Point) aims to figure out the strategies people use to assess strangers-to "analyze, critique them, figure out where they came from, figure out how to fix them," in other words: to understand how to balance trust and safety. He uses a variety of examples from history and recent headlines to illustrate that people size up the motivations, emotions, and trustworthiness of those they don't know both wrongly and with misplaced confidence.

305.42 G

Gates, Melinda, 1964- author. The moment of lift : how empowering women changes the world. Introduction -- The lift of a great idea -- Empowering mothers: maternal and newborn health -- Every good thing: family planning -- Lifting their eyes: girls in schools -- The silent inequality: unpaid work -- When a girl has no voice: child marriage -- Seeing gender bias: women in agriculture -- Creating a new culture: women in the workplace -- Let your heart break: the lift of coming together -- Epilogue.

306.3 A

Anderson, S. E. (Sam E.). The Black holocaust for beginners. Reprint ed. Danbury, CT : For Beginners LLC, c1995.

306.36 H

Hurston, Zora Neale, author. Barracoon : the story of the last "black cargo" First edition. Foreword : Those who love us never leave us alone with our grief: reading Barracoon: the story of the last "black cargo" / by Alice Walker -- Introduction -- Barracoon : Preface -- Introduction -- The king arrives -- Barracoon -- Slavery -- Freedom -- Marriage -- Kossula learns about law -- Alone -- Appendix : Takkoi or Attako: children's game ; Stories Kossula told me ; The monkey and the camel ; Story of de Jonah ; Now disa Abraham fadda de faitful ; The lion woman -- Afterword and additional materials / edited by Deborah G. Plant -- Founders and original residents of Africatown -- Glossary. "In 1927, Zora Neale Hurston went to Plateau, Alabama, just outside Mobile, to interview eighty-six-year-old Cudjo Lewis. Of the millions of men, women, and children transported from Africa to America as slaves, Cudjo was then the only person alive to tell the story of this integral part of the nation's history. Hurston was there to record Cudjo's firsthand account of the raid that led to his capture and bondage fifty years after the Atlantic slave trade was outlawed in the United States. In 1931, Hurston returned to Plateau, the African-centric community three miles from Mobile founded by Cudjo and other former slaves from his ship. Spending more than three months there, she talked in depth with Cudjo about the details of his life. During those weeks, the young writer and the elderly formerly enslaved man ate peaches and watermelon that grew in the backyard and talked about Cudjo's past--memories from his childhood in Africa, the horrors of being captured and held in a barracoon for selection by American slavers, the harrowing experience of the Middle Passage packed with more than 100 other souls aboard the Clotilda, and the years he spent in slavery until the end of the Civil War. Based on those interviews, featuring Cudjo's unique vernacular, and written from Hurston's perspective with the compassion and singular style that have made her one of the preeminent American authors of the twentieth-century, Barracoon masterfully illustrates the tragedy of slavery and of one life forever defined by it. Offering insight into the pernicious legacy that continues to haunt us all, black and white, this poignant and powerful work is an invaluable contribution to our shared history and culture."--Publisher's website.

342.73 C

The Founding Fathers & Paul B. Skousen. The Constitution & The Declaration of Independence. Salt Lake City, UT : Izzardink, 2016; 2017.

342.73 P

The Know your Bill of Rights book. First edition. United States : Oculus Publishers, Inc, 2013.

364.1 H

Hate crimes. 1. Hate as part of society : -- Defining hate -- What we investigate -- FBI releases 2018 hate crime statistics -- Learn more about hate crimes -- The U.S. finally made lynching a Federal crime -- Hate-crime violence its 16-year high, FBI reports -- Mail bombs, hate crimes, and he meaning of terrorism -- 2. Causes and responses : -- Entering an era of rising hate crimes -- Trump and racism: what do the data say? -- American Islamophobia in the age of Trump: the global war on terror, continued? -- Steve Scalise: don't blame Trump for mass shootings -- Did counties hosting a Trump rally in 2016 see a 226% spike in hate crimes? -- "We need to evolve": police get help to improve hate crime tracking -- The FBI's new approach to combating domestic terrorism: straight talk -- Congressman Serrano and Senator Casey introduce the Stop Hate Act to address the rise in hate crimes through social media -- 3. Hate laws and the Constitution : -- The limits of Free Speech -- Is the cure of censorship better than the disease of hate speech? -- The limits of Free Speech for White Supremacists marching at the Unite the Right 2, explained -- Hate speech and hate crime -- the El Paso shooting revived the Free Speech debate. Europe has limits -- Portland considers Antimask Law aimed at Antifa violence -- Free Speech can be messy, but we need it -- Should we treat domestic terrorists the way we treat ISIS? -- 4. Prevention, outreach, and training : -- Schools as safe places for learning -- Hate crime in America policy summit -- Hate in schools: an in-depth look -- Political correctness and anti-Jewish bias mar first draft of California's Ethnic Studies curriculum -- Justice Department commemorates 10th anniversary of Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr., Hate Crimes Prevention Act -- 5. The role of the media and big tech : -- The connected society -- How Journalists cover mass shootings: research to consider -- In Congressional hearing on hate, the haters got their way -- A campus murder tests Facebook clicks as evidence of hate -- The media botched the Covington Catholic story -- Hate speech on social media: global comparisons -- How Big Tech can fight White Supremacist terrorism: it has the tools- it just needs to use them.

364.15 K

Kantor, Jodi, 1975- author. She said : breaking the sexual harassment story that helped ignite a movement. The first phone call -- Hollywood secrets -- How to silence a victim -- "Positive reputation management" -- A company's complicity -- "Who else is on the record?" -- "There will be a movement" -- The beachside dilemma -- "I can't guarantee I'll go to DC" -- Epilogue: The gathering. For many years, reporters had tried to get to the truth about Harvey Weinstein's treatment of women. Rumors of wrongdoing had long circulated. But in 2017, when Jodi Kantor and Megan Twohey began their investigation into the prominent Hollywood producer for the New York Times, his name was still synonymous with power. During months of confidential interviews with top actresses, former Weinstein employees, and other sources, many disturbing and long-buried allegations were unearthed, and a web of onerous secret payouts and nondisclosure agreements was revealed. These shadowy settlements had long been used to hide sexual harassment and abuse, but with a breakthrough reporting technique Kantor and Twohey helped to expose it. But Weinstein had evaded scrutiny in the past, and he was not going down without a fight. He employed a team of high-profile lawyers, private investigators, and other allies to thwart the investigation. When Kantor and Twohey were finally able to convince some sources to go on the record, a dramatic final showdown between Weinstein and the New York Times was set in motion. Nothing could have prepared Kantor and Twohey for what followed the publication of their initial Weinstein story on October 5, 2017. Within days, a veritable Pandora's box of sexual harassment and abuse was opened. Women all over the world came forward with their own traumatic stories. Over the next twelve months, hundreds of men from every walk of life and industry were outed following allegations of wrongdoing. But did too much change -- or not enough? Those questions hung in the air months later as Brett Kavanaugh was nominated to the Supreme Court, and Christine Blasey Ford came forward to testify that he had assaulted her decades earlier. Kantor and Twohey, who had unique access to Ford and her team, bring to light the odyssey that led her to come forward, the overwhelming forces that came to bear on her, and what happened after she shared her allegation with the world.

512 A

Lead authors: John A. Carter, Ph.D., Gilbert J. Cuevas,Ph.D., Roger Day, Ph.D., NBCT, Carol Malloy, Ph.D.; Program Authors: Dr. Berchie Holliday, Ed.D., Ruth Casey, Dinah Zike, Jay McTighe; Lead Consultant: Viken Hovsepian. Algebra 2. Glencoe/McGraw-Hill Education, 2012. Columbus, OH : McGraw-Hill Companies, c. 2012.

612 B

Bryson, Bill, author. The body : a guide for occupants. First U.S. edition. How to build a human -- The outside: skin and hair -- Microbial you -- The brain -- The head -- Down the hatch: the mouth and throat -- The heart and blood -- The chemistry department -- In the dissecting room: the skeleton -- On the move: bipedalism and exercise -- Equilibrium -- The immune system -- Deep breath: the lungs and breathing -- Food, glorious food -- The guts -- Sleep -- Into the nether regions -- In the beginning: conception and birth -- Nerves and pain -- When things go wrong: diseases -- Then things go very wrong: cancer -- Medicine good and bad -- The end. "Bill Bryson, bestselling author of A Short History of Nearly Everything, takes us on a head-to-toe tour of the marvel that is the human body. As compulsively readable as it is comprehensive, this is Bryson at his very best, a must-read owner's manual for everybody. Bill Bryson once again proves himself to be an incomparable companion as he guides us through the human body--how it functions, its remarkable ability to heal itself, and (unfortunately) the ways it can fail. Full of extraordinary facts (your body made a million red blood cells since you started reading this) and irresistible Bryson-esque anecdotes, The Body will lead you to a deeper understanding of the miracle that is life in general and you in particular. As Bill Bryson writes, "We pass our existence within this wobble of flesh and yet take it almost entirely for granted." The Body will cure that indifference with generous doses of wondrous, compulsively readable facts and information"--. "From the bestselling author of A SHORT HISTORY OF NEARLY EVERYTHING, a head-to-toe tour of the marvel that is the human body"--.

801.95092

Barish, Evelyn, 1935-. The double life of Paul de Man. First Edition.

812.54 K

Kushner, Tony. Angels in America : Part One and Two. 2007. London : Nick Hern Books, 2007. Reprinted 2015. pt. 1. Millennium approaches -- pt. 2. Perestroika.

812.54 W

Williams, Tennessee, 1911-1983. The glass menagerie. New Directions Book. New York, NY : New Directions Publishing, 1999. The embattled Wingfield family: Amanda, a faded southern belle, abandoned wife, dominating mother, who hopes to match her daughter with an eligible "gentleman caller;" Laura, a lame and painfully shy, she evades her mother's schemes and reality by retreating to a world of make-believe; Tom's sole support of the family, he eventually leaves home to become a writer but is forever haunted by the memory of Laura. The only single edition now available of this American classic about a mother obsessed with her disabled daughter.

812.6 B

Barron, Clare, author. Baby screams miracle. A freak storm knocks down all the trees in town and brings a prodigal daughter rushing home. But has she come for reconciliation? Or as an angel of vengeance? A comic new play about love, forgiveness and family struggling to operate in a relentlessly chaotic and violent world.

812.6 D

DeLappe, Sarah, author. The wolves : a play. 1st ed. "The Wolves follows nine teenage girls as they warm up for their indoor soccer games. From the safety of their suburban stretch circle, the team navigates big questions and wages tiny battles with all the vim and vigor of a pack of adolescent warriors. As the teammates warm up in sync, a symphony of overlapping dialogue spills out their concerns. By season's and play's end, amidst the wins and losses, rivalries and tragedies, they are tested and ready--they are The Wolves." -- Back cover.

822.914 B

Butterworth, Jez, author. The ferryman. Revised edition. Rural County Armagh, Ireland, 1981. The Carney farmhouse is a hive of activity with preparations for the annual harvest. A day of hard work on the land and a traditional night of feasting and celebrations lie ahead. But this year they will be interrupted by a visitor.

940.54 L

Larson, Erik, 1954- author. The splendid and the vile. First edition. Bleak Expectations -- The Rising Threat -- A Certain Eventuality -- Dread -- Blood and Dust -- The Americans -- Love Amid the Flames -- One Year to the Day -- Epilogue. "The #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Devil in the White City and Dead Wake delivers a fresh and compelling portrait of Winston Churchill and London during the Blitz On Winston Churchill's first day as prime minister, Hitler invaded Holland and Belgium. Poland and Czechoslovakia had already fallen, and the Dunkirk evacuation was just two weeks away. For the next twelve months, Hitler would wage a relentless bombing campaign, killing 45,000 Britons. It was up to Churchill to hold the country together and persuade President Franklin Roosevelt that Britain was a worthy ally-and willing to fight to the end. In The Splendid and the Vile, Erik Larson shows, in cinematic detail, how Churchill taught the British people "the art of being fearless." It is a story of political brinkmanship, but it's also an intimate domestic drama set against the backdrop of Churchill's prime-ministerial country home, Chequers; his wartime retreat, Ditchley, where he and his entourage go when the moon is brightest and the bombing threat is highest; and of course 10 Downing Street in London. Drawing on diaries, original archival documents, and once-secret intelligence reports-some released only recently-Larson provides a new lens on London's darkest year through the day-to-day experience of Churchill and his family: his wife, Clementine; their youngest daughter, Mary, who chafes against her parents' wartime protectiveness; their son, Randolph, and his beautiful, unhappy wife, Pamela; Pamela's illicit lover, a dashing American emissary; and the cadre of close advisers who comprised Churchill's "Secret Circle," including his lovestruck private secretary, John Colville; newspaper baron Lord Beaverbrook; and the Rasputin-like Frederick Lindemann. The Splendid and the Vile takes readers out of today's political dysfunction and back to a time of true leadership, when-in the face of unrelenting horror-Churchill's eloquence, courage, and perseverance bound a country, and a family, together."--.

940.54 P

Purnell, Sonia, author. A woman of no importance : the untold story of the American spy who helped win World War II. The dream -- Cometh the hour -- My tart friends -- Good-bye to Dindy -- Twelve minutes, twelve men -- Honeycomb of spies -- Cruel mountain -- Agent most wanted -- Scores to settle -- Madonna of the mountains -- From the skies above -- The CIA years. "The never-before-told story of one woman's heroism that changed the course of the Second World War In 1942, the Gestapo sent out an urgent command across France: "She is the most dangerous of all Allied spies. We must find and destroy her." This spy was Virginia Hall, a young American woman--rejected from the foreign service because of her gender and her prosthetic leg--who talked her way into the spy organization dubbed Churchill's "ministry of ungentlemanly warfare," and, before the United States had even entered the war, became the first woman to deploy to occupied France. Virginia Hall was one of the greatest spies in American history, yet her story remains untold. Just as she did in Clementine, Sonia Purnell uncovers the captivating story of a powerful, influential, yet shockingly overlooked heroine of the Second World War. At a time when sending female secret agents into enemy territory was still strictly forbidden, Virginia Hall came to be known as the "Madonna of the Resistance," coordinating a network of spies to blow up bridges, report on German troop movements, arrange equipment drops for Resistance agents, and recruit and train guerilla fighters. Even as her face covered WANTED posters throughout Europe, Virginia refused order after order to evacuate. She finally escaped with her life in a grueling hike over the Pyrenees into Spain, her cover blown, and her associates all imprisoned or executed. But, adamant that she had "more lives to save," she dove back in as soon as she could, organizing forces to sabotage enemy lines and back up Allied forces landing on Normandy beaches. Told with Purnell's signature insight and novelistic panache, A Woman of No Importance is the breathtaking story of how one woman's fierce persistence helped win the war"--.

943.086 B

Bergen, Doris L., author. War and genocide : a concise history of the Holocaust. Barnes & Noble, 2007. Preconditions : antisemitism, racism, and common prejudices in early-twentieth century Europe -- Leadership and will : Adolf Hitler, the National Socialist German Workers' Party, and Nazi ideology -- From revolution to routine : Nazi Germany, 1933-1938 -- Open aggression : in search of war, 1938-1939 -- Experiments in brutality, 1939-1940 : war against Poland and the so-called euthanasia program -- Expansion and systemization : exporting war and terror, 1940-1941 -- The peak years of killing: 1942 and 1943 -- Death throes and killing frenzies, 1944-1945.

946.9 H

Hatton, Barry, 1963- author. Queen of the sea : a history of Lisbon. "Lisbon was almost somewhere else. Portuguese officials considered moving the city after it was devastated by what is believed to be the strongest earthquake ever to strike modern Europe, in 1755, followed by a tidal wave as high as a double-decker bus and a six-day inferno that turned sand into glass. Lisbon's charm is legendary, but its rich, 2,000-year history is not widely known. This single-volume history provides an unrivaled and intimate portrait of the city and an entertaining account of its colourful past. It reveals that in Roman times the city was more important than initially thought, possessing a large theatre and hippodrome. The 1147 Siege of Lisbon was a dramatic medieval battle that was a key part of the Iberian reconquista. As Portugal built an empire spanning four continents, its capital became a wealthy international bazaar. The Portuguese king's cort©·ge was led by a rhinoceros which was followed by five elephants in gold brocade, an Arabian horse and a jaguar. The Portuguese were the world's biggest slavers, and by the mid-16th century around 10 percent of the Lisbon's population was black, imbuing the city with an African flavour it has retained. Invasion by Napoleon's armies, and the assassination of a king and the establishment of a republic, also left their marks. The city's two bridges over the River Tagus illustrate the legacy of a 20th-century dictator and Portugal's new era in Europe."--Publisher's description.

955.05 I

Iran. Detroit : Greenhaven Press, 2006. Presents all sides to several issues concerning Iran, including debates about global security, human rights, and nuclear weapons.

973.092

Chernow, Ron. Alexander Hamilton. Prologue: The Oldest Revolutionary War Widow -- The Castaways -- Hurricane -- The Collegian -- The Pen and the Sword -- The Little Lion -- A Frenzy of Valor -- The Lovesick Colonel -- Glory -- Raging Billows -- A Grave, Silent, Strange Sort of Animal -- Ghosts -- August and Respectable Assembly -- Publius -- Putting the Machine in Motion -- Villainous Business -- Dr. Pangloss -- The First Town in America -- Of Avarice and Enterprise -- City of the Future -- Corrupt Squadrons -- Exposure -- Stabbed in the Dark -- Citizen Genet -- A Disagreeable Trade -- Seas of Blood -- The Wicked Insurgents of the West -- Sugar Plums and Toys -- Spare Cassius -- The Man in the Glass Bubble -- Flying Too Near the Sun -- An Instrument of Hell -- Reign of Witches -- Works Godly and Ungodly -- In an Evil Hour -- Gusts of Passion -- In a Very Belligerent Humor -- Deadlock -- A World Full of Folly -- Pamphlet Wars -- The Price of Truth -- A Despicable Opinion -- Fatal Errand -- The Melting Scene -- Epilogue: Eliza. Ron Chernow tells the story of a man who overcame all odds to shape, inspire, and scandalize the newborn America. Few figures in American history have been more hotly debated or more grossly misunderstood than Alexander Hamilton. Chernow's biography argues that the political and economic greatness of today's America is the result of Hamilton's countless sacrifices to champion ideas that were often wildly disputed during his time. Chernow here recounts Hamilton's turbulent life: an illegitimate, largely self-taught orphan from the Caribbean, he came out of nowhere to take America by storm, rising to become George Washington's aide-de-camp in the Continental Army, coauthoring The Federalist Papers, founding the Bank of New York, leading the Federalist Party, and becoming the first Treasury Secretary of the United States. Historians have long told the story of America's birth as the triumph of Jefferson's democratic ideals over the aristocratic intentions of Hamilton. Chernow presents an entirely different man, whose legendary ambitions were motivated not merely by self-interest but by passionate patriotism and a stubborn will to build the foundations of American prosperity and power. His is a Hamilton far more human than we've encountered before -- from his shame about his birth to his fiery aspirations, from his intimate relationships with childhood friends to his titanic feuds with Jefferson, Madison, Adams, Monroe, and Burr, and from his highly public affair with Maria Reynolds to his loving marriage to his loyal wife Eliza. And never before has there been a more vivid account of Hamilton's famous and mysterious death in a duel with Aaron Burr in July of 1804.

973.921 W

Wicker, Tom. Dwight D. Eisenhower. First edition. New York : Times Books, 2002. An American hero at the close of World War II, General Dwight Eisenhower rode an enormous wave of popularity into the Oval Office seven years later. Though we may view the Eisenhower years through a hazy lens of 1950s nostalgia, historians consider his presidency one of the least successful. At home there was civil rights unrest, McCarthyism, and a deteriorating economy; internationally, the Cold War was deepening. But despite his tendency toward "brinksmanship," Ike would later be revered for "keeping the peace." Still, his actions and policies at the onset of his career, covered by Tom Wicker, would haunt Americans of future generations.

976.1 K

Kennedy, Peggy Wallace, author. The broken road. The bridge -- In the beginning -- Romance in the air -- Coming home -- The race -- Into the darkness -- The broken road -- You got what you wanted -- The victory is ours -- 1963 -- Picture perfect -- A storm's a-comin' -- Success is to succeed -- Dynasty -- For you -- Stand up -- Things just change -- Buckle my shoes -- The book of lamentations -- 'Til death do us part -- In tents -- Testify, brother Wallace! -- Stepping down -- Benched -- The end of an era -- Doors -- Letters from Baghdad -- Back to the bridge. "From the daughter of one of America's most virulent segregationists, a memoir that reckons with her father George Wallace's legacy of hate -- and illuminates her journey towards redemption. Peggy Wallace Kennedy has been widely hailed as the 'symbol of racial reconciliation' (Washington Post). In the summer of 1963, though, she was just a young girl watching her father stand in a schoolhouse door as he tried to block two African-American students from entering the University of Alabama. This man, former governor of Alabama and presidential candidate George Wallace, was notorious for his hateful rhetoric and his political stunts. But he was also a larger-than-life father to young Peggy, who was taught to smile, sit straight, and not speak up as her father took to the political stage. At the end of his life, Wallace came to renounce his views, although he could never attempt to fully repair the damage he caused. But Peggy, after her own political awakening, dedicated her life to spreading the new Wallace message -- one of peace, penance, and compassion. In this powerful new memoir, Peggy looks back on the politics of her youth and attempts to reconcile her adored father with the man who coined the phrase 'Segregation now. Segregation tomorrow. Segregation forever.' Timely and timeless, The Broken Road speaks to change, atonement, activism, and racial reconciliation"--.

977 McC

McCullough, David G., author. The pioneers : the heroic story of the settlers who brought the American ideal west. First Simon & Schuster hardcover edition. The Ohio country -- Forth to the wilderness -- Difficult times -- Havoc -- A new era commences -- The Burr conspiracy -- Adversities aplenty -- The cause of learning -- The travelers -- Journey's end. "Best-selling author David McCullough tells the story of the settlers who began America's migration west, overcoming almost-unimaginable hardships to build in the Ohio wilderness a town and a government that incorporated America's highest ideals"--.

92 O'Connor

Thomas, Evan, 1951- author. First : Sandra Day O'Connor. Prologue -- Lazy B -- Stanford -- The golden couple -- Majority leader -- Arizona judge -- The President calls -- Inside the Marble Palace -- Scrutiny -- FWOTSC -- Cancer -- A woman's role -- Civil religion -- Bush v. Gore -- Affirmative action -- End game -- Labor of love. "Based on exclusive interviews and access to the Supreme Court archives, this is the intimate, inspiring, and authoritative biography of America's first female Justice, Sandra Day O'Connor--by New York Times bestselling author Evan Thomas. She was born in 1930 in El Paso and grew up on a cattle ranch in Arizona. At a time when women were expected to be homemakers, she set her sights on Stanford University. When she graduated near the top of her class at law school in 1952, no firm would even interview her. But Sandra Day O'Connor's story is that of a woman who repeatedly shattered glass ceilings--doing so with a blend of grace, wisdom, humor, understatement, and cowgirl toughness. She became the first-ever female majority leader of a state senate. As a judge on the Arizona State Court of Appeals, she stood up to corrupt lawyers and humanized the law. When she arrived at the Supreme Court, appointed by Reagan in 1981, she began a quarter-century tenure on the court, hearing cases that ultimately shaped American law. Diagnosed with cancer at fifty-eight, and caring for a husband with Alzheimer's, O'Connor endured every difficulty with grit and poise. Women and men today will be inspired by how to be first in your own life, how to know when to fight and when to walk away, through O'Connor's example. This is a remarkably vivid and personal portrait of a woman who loved her family and believed in serving her country, who, when she became the most powerful woman in America, built a bridge forward for the women who followed her"--. At a time when women were expected to be homemakers, Sandra Day O'Connor set her sights on Stanford University. When she graduated near the top of her class at law school in 1952, no firm would even interview her. She became the first-ever female majority leader of a state senate, a judge on the Arizona State Court of Appeals, and arrived at the Supreme Court in 1981 to begin a quarter-century tenure on the court. Thomas provides a vivid and personal portrait of a woman who loved her family, believed in serving her country, and built a bridge forward for the women who followed her. -- adapted from jacket.

ACT Manual

Stern, David Alan. Acting with an accent : a step-by-step approach to learning dialects. Lyndonville, VT : Dialect Accent Specialists, c1979-1987. [v. 1.] Standard British -- [v. 2.] Cockney -- [v. 3.] New York City -- [v. 4.] American Southern -- [v. 5.] Irish -- [v. 6.] Scottish -- [v. 7.] Spanish -- [v. 8.] Italian -- [v. 9.] French -- [v. 10.] German -- [v. 11.] Russian -- [v. 12.] Yiddish -- [v. 13.] Texas -- [v. 14.] Boston -- [v. 15.] Down east New England -- 16. Upper class Massachusetts or "Kennedy-esque" -- [v. 17.] Chicago -- 18. Mid-west farm/ranch -- 19. Polish -- [v. 20.] Arabic -- [v. 21.] Farsi (Persian) -- [v. 22.] Norwegian & Swedish -- [v. 23.] West Indian & Black African -- [v. 24.] British north country -- [v. 25.] Australian. Step-by-step instruction and practice in learning to speak English in various domestic and foreign dialects.

DVD For

Forbidden Hollywood collection. Turner Classic Movies Archives. Burbank, CA : Turner Entertainment Company and Warner Brothers Entertainment Inc. Disc 1: Other Men's Women; The Purchase Price. Disc 2: Frisco Jenny; Midnight Mary. Disc 3: Heroes for Sale; Wild Boys of the Road. Disc 4: Wild Bil: Hollywood Maverick; The Men Who Made the Movies: William A. Wellman. Other men's women: Grant Withers, Regis Toomey, Mary Astor, J. Farrell MacDonald. The purchase price: Barbara Stanwyck, George Brent, Lyle Talbot. Frisco Jenny: Ruth Chatterton, Louis Calhern. Midnight Mary: Loretta Young, Ricardo Cortez, Franchot Tone, Andy Devine. Heroes for sale: Richard Barthelmess, Aline MacMahon, Loretta Young, Gordon Westcott. Wild boys of the road: Frankie Darro, Dorothy Coonan, Rochelle Hudson, Edwin Phillips. Wild Bill: Hollywood maverick - narrator, Alec Baldwin. Disc 1: Other men's women: Bill and Jack are railroad men. When Bill comes to stay with Jack and his wife, Bill and Lily fall in love. Jack confronts Bill about his suspicions and the two fight, leaving Jack seriously injured. The purchase price: Joan Gordon is a singer tiring of her relationship with Eddie. She flees to North Dakota to become a mail-order bride. Happiness is threatened by her stubborn husband, a lecherous neighbor and the appearance of Eddie. Disc 2: Frisco Jenny: Jenny was orphaned by the 1906 earthquake and fire and has gone on to become the madame of a prosperous bawdy house. After putting her son up for adoption, he becomes a district attorney dedicated to closing down such houses. She kills an underling who wants her son dead and is now facing execution. Midnight Mary: A mistaken arrest, a prison term, and lack of employment leads to a young woman's involvement with gangsters. In a brothel she meets a wealthy lawyer who falls in love with her. He helps her turn her life around, but her past catches up with her. Now she is on trial for murder. Disc 3: Heroes for sale: A man stands up during a WWI battle and becomes a hero, but he doesn't get the credit. He becomes injuried and soon gets hooked on morphine, causing him to fall apart when he returns home. He eventually marries, but soon the Depression hits. Wild boys of the road: Tom and Ed are high school students whose parents, thanks to the Depression, have lost their jobs. Wanting to help make money, they set off on the rails looking for work. They finally end up in New York and Ed thinks he might have foud a job. Disc 4: Wild Bill: Explores the life and directorial times of William A. Wellman. The men who made the movies: Wellman shares many stories and speaks bluntly of the producers with who he has worked and describes his remarkable star-making and star-spotting abilities. He was responsible for helping actors win Oscars and discovered such notable actors as James Cagney and Gary Cooper.

DVD Gra

The grapes of wrath. [DVD version includes: commentary by Joseph McBride and Susan Shillinglaw; prologue from British version; Biography. Darryl F. Zanuck : twentieth century filmmaker; 3 drought reports from 1934 Movietone news newsreels; outtakes; still gallery; featurette entitled Roosevelt lauds motion pictures at Academy fete; restoration comparison; English and Spanish tracks and subtitles]. Henry Fonda (Tom Joad); Jane Darwell (Ma Joad); John Carradine (Casy); Charley Grapewin (grandpa); Dorris Bowdon (Rosasharn); Russell Simpson (Pa Joad); O.Z. Whitehead (Al); John Qualen (Muley); Eddie Quillan (Connie); Zeffie Tilbury (grandma); Frank Sully (Noah); Frank Darien (Uncle John); Darryl Hickman (Winfield); Shirley Mills (Ruth Joad); Roger Imhof (Thomas); Grant Mitchell (caretaker); Charles D. Brown (Wilkie); John Arledge (Davis); Ward Bond (policeman); Harry Tyler (Bert); William Pawley (Bill); Charles Tannen (Joe); Selmar Jackson (inspection officer); Charles Middleton (leader); Eddie Waller (proprietor); Paul Guilfoyle (Floyd); David Hughes (Frank); Cliff Clark (city man); Joseph Sawyer (bookkeeper); Frank Faylen (Tim); Adrian Morris (agent); Hollis Jewell (Muley's son); Robert Homans (Spencer); Irving Bacon (Roy); Kitty McHugh (Mae); Arthur Aylesworth (father); Norman Willis, Lee Shumway, Frank O'Connor, Tom Tyler, Harry Cording, Ralph Dunn, Paul Sutton, Pat Flaherty, Dick Rich (deputies); Mae Marsh (Muley's wife); Herbert Heywood (gas station man); Harry Strang (Fred); Walter Miller (border guard); Gaylord Pendleton, Ben Hall, Robert Shaw (gas station attendants); George O'Hara (clerk); Thornton Edwards (motor cop); Russ Clark, James Flavin, Philip Morris, Max Wagner (guards); Trevor Bardette (Jule); Jack Pennick (committee man); Walter McGrail (leader of gang); William Haade (deputy driver); Ted Oliver (state policeman); Gloria Roy (waitress); George Breakstone, Wally Albright (boys); John Wallace (migrant); Erville Alderson, Louis Mason, Shirley Coates, Peggy Ryan, Georgia Simmons, Harry Holden, Hal Budlong, John Binns, Harry Wallace, L.F. O'Connor, Cliff Herbert, Joe Bordeaux, Tyler Gibson, Leon Brace, Harry Matthews, Frank Newberg, Jack Walters, Bill Wolfe, Delmar Costello, Bill Worth, Frank Atkinson, James Welch, Charles Thurston, Jules Michaelson, Waclaw Rekwart, Sidney Hayes, E.J. Kaspar, D.H. Turner, David Kirkland, C.B. Steele, Frank Watson, Al Stewart, Henry Barhe, Scotty Brown, Charles West, Dean hall, Walton Pindon, Charles W. Hertzinger, W.H. Davis, Scotty Mattraw, Chauncey Pyle, Walter Perry, Billy Elmer, Buster Brodie, Barney Gilmore, Cal Cohen, Nora Bush, Jane Crowley, Eleanor Vogel, Lillian Drew, Cecil Cook, Helen Dean, Pearl Varvell, hazel Lollier, Emily Gerdes, Rose Plummer, Mrs. Gladys Rehfeld, Edna Hall, Josephine Allen.

DVD It

It happened one night. Full screen. [Culver City, Calif.] : Columbia Pictures ;, c2008. Clark Gable, Claudette Colbert, Walter Connolly, Roscoe Karns, Jameson Thomas, Alan Hale, Arhtur Hoyt. When her father threatens to annul her marriage to a fortune-hunting playboy, spoiled heiress Ellie Andrews hops a cross-country bus to New York, where she plans to live happily ever after with her handsome new hubby. Romantic complications soon arise, however, when she's befriended by fellow passenger Peter Warne, a brash and breezy reporter who offers his help in exchange for her exclusive story.

DVD Mar

The Marx brothers collection. Warner Brothers Home Video. Set includes: 1) A Night at the Opera; 2) A Day at the Races; 3) A night in Casablanca; 4) Room Service; 5) At the Circus; 6) Go West; 7) The Big Store.

DVD Sca

Scarface. Paul Muni, Ann Dvorak, Karen Morley, Osgood Pergkins, C. Henry Gordon, George Raft, Vince Barnett, Boris Karloff, Purnell Pratt. "An exciting story of organized crime's brutal control over Chicago during the prohibition era. This compelling tale of ambition, betrayal and revenge is a groundbreaking masterpiece that influenced all gangster films to follow."--Container.

DVD Swi

Swing time. DVD special edition. Fred Astaire, Ginger Rogers, Victor Moore, Helen Broderick, Eric Blore, Betty Furness, Georges Metaxa. "In this irresistible musical, the legendary dancing duo Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers are at the pinnacle of their art as a feckless gambler and the shrewd dancing instructor in whom he more than meets his match. Director George Stevens laces their romance with humor and clears the floor for the movie's showstopping dance scenes, in which Astaire and Rogers take seemingly effortless flight in a virtuosic fusion of ballroom and tap styles. Buoyed by beloved songs by Dorothy Fields and Jerome Kern--including the Oscar-winning classic 'The Way You Look Tonight'--Swing Time is an exuberant celebration of its stars' chemistry, grace, and sheer joy in the act of performance"--Container.

DVD Wil

Wild boys of the road. Warner Bros., Home Video, 1950s. In the depths of the Depression, two teenage boys strike out on their own in order to help their struggling parents and find life on the road tougher than expected.

EQUIP

Digital Voice Recorder : Multi-function stereo recorder. Olympus Model WS-852. Tokyo: : Olympus Corporation; Olympus America, Inc., PA, 2015.

F Cum

Cummins, Jeanine, author. American dirt. First U.S. edition. "También de este lado hay sueños. Lydia Quixano Perez lives in the Mexican city of Acapulco. She runs a bookstore. She has a son, Luca, the love of her life, and a wonderful husband who is a journalist. And while there are cracks beginning to show in Acapulco because of the drug cartels, her life is, by and large, fairly comfortable. Even though she knows they'll never sell, Lydia stocks some of her all-time favorite books in her store. And then one day a man enters the shop to browse and comes up to the register with four books he would like to buy-two of them her favorites. Javier is erudite. He is charming. And, unbeknownst to Lydia, he is the jefe of the newest drug cartel that has gruesomely taken over the city. When Lydia's husband's tell-all profile of Javier is published, none of their lives will ever be the same. Forced to flee, Lydia and eight-year-old Luca soon find themselves miles and worlds away from their comfortable middle-class existence. Instantly transformed into migrants, Lydia and Luca ride la bestia-trains that make their way north toward the United States, which is the only place Javier's reach doesn't extend. As they join the countless people trying to reach el norte, Lydia soon sees that everyone is running from something. But what exactly are they running to? American Dirt will leave readers utterly changed when they finish reading it. A page-turner filled with poignancy, drama, and humanity on every page, it is a literary achievement."--.

F Fre

Freudenberger, Nell. The dissident. 1st ed. New York : ECCO, c2006.

F Fre

Freudenberger, Nell, author. Lost and wanted. First Edition. "Told from the perspective of a female physicist in Cambridge, Massachusetts, a story that explores the nature of friendship, romantic love, and motherhood"--.

F Gla

Gladstone, Max, author. Full fathom five. First Trade paperback edition. "On the island of Kavekana, Kai builds gods to order, then hands them to others to maintain. Her creations aren't conscious and lack their own wills and voices, but they accept sacrifices, and protect their worshippers from other gods--perfect vehicles for Craftsmen and Craftswomen operating in the divinely controlled Old World. When Kai sees one of her creations dying and tries to save her, she's grievously injured--then sidelined from the business entirely, her near-suicidal rescue attempt offered up as proof of her instability. But when Kai gets tired of hearing her boss, her coworkers, and her ex-boyfriend call her crazy, and starts digging into the reasons her creations die, she uncovers a conspiracy of silence and fear--which will crush her, if Kai can't stop it first"--.

F Gla

Gladstone, Max, author. Last first snow. First Trade paperback edition. "Forty years after the God Wars, Dresediel Lex bears the scars of liberation--especially in the Skittersill, a poor district still bound by the fallen gods' decaying edicts. As long as the gods' wards last, they strangle development; when they fail, demons will be loosed upon the city. The King in Red hires Elayne Kevarian of the Craft firm Kelethres, Albrecht, and Ao to fix the wards, but the Skittersill's people have their own ideas. A protest rises against Elayne's work, led by Temoc, a warrior-priest turned community organizer who wants to build a peaceful future for his city, his wife, and his young son. As Elayne drags Temoc and the King in Red to the bargaining table, old wounds reopen, old gods stir in their graves, civil blood breaks to new mutiny, and profiteers circle in the desert sky. Elayne and Temoc must fight conspiracy, dark magic, and their own demons to save the peace--or failing that, to save as many people as they can"--.

F Gla

Gladstone, Max, author. Three parts dead. First Trade Paperback Edition. "A god has died, and it's up to Tara, first-year associate in the international necromantic firm of Kelethres, Albrecht, and Ao, to bring Him back to life before His city falls apart. Her client is Kos, recently deceased fire god of the city of Alt Coulumb. Without Him, the metropolis' steam generators will shut down, its trains will cease running, and its four million citizens will riot. Tara's job: resurrect Kos before chaos sets in. Her only help: Abelard, a chain-smoking priest of the dead god, who's having an understandable crisis of faith. When the dou discovers that Kos was murdered, they have to make a case in Alt Coulumb's courts--and their quest for the truth endangers their partnership, their lives, and Alt Coulumb's slim hope of survival."--from publisher's description.

F Gla

Gladstone, Max, author. Two serpents rise. First Trade paperback edition. "Shadow demons plague the city reservoir, and Red King Consolidated has sent in Caleb Altemoc--casual gambler and professional risk manager--to cleanse the water for the sixteen million people of Dresediel Lex. At the scene of the crime, Caleb finds an alluring and clever cliff runner, crazy Mal, who easily outpaces him. But Caleb has more than the demon infestation, Mal, or job security to worry about when he discovers that his father--the last priest of the old gods and leader of the True Quechal terrorists--has broken into his home and is wanted in connection to the attacks on the water supply. From the beginning, Caleb and Mal are bound by lust, Craft, and chance, as both play a dangerous game where gods and people are pawns. They sleep on water, they dance in fire ... and all the while the Twin Serpents slumbering beneath the earth are stirring, and they are hungry."--.

F Gla

Ruin of angels. First edition, 2017. New York, NY : Tor, c.2017. "The God Wars destroyed the city of Alikand. Now, a century and a half and a great many construction contracts later, Agdel Lex rises in its place. Dead deities litter the surrounding desert, streets shift when people aren't looking, a squidlike tower dominates the skyline, and the foreign Iskari Rectification Authority keeps strict order in this once-independent city--while treasure seekers, criminals, combat librarians, nightmare artists, angels, demons, dispossessed knights, grad students, and other fools gather in its ever-changing alleys, hungry for the next big score. Priestess/investment banker Kai Pohala (last seen in Full Fathom Five) hits town to corner Agdel Lex's burgeoning nightmare startup scene, and to visit her estranged sister Lei. But Kai finds Lei desperate at the center of a shadowy, and rapidly unravelling, business deal. When Lei ends up on the run, wanted for a crime she most definitely committed, Kai races to track her sister down before the Authority finds her first. But Lei has her own plans, involving her ex-girlfriend, a daring heist into the god-haunted desert, and, perhaps, freedom for an occupied city. Because Alikand might not be completely dead--and some people want to finish the job."--Amazon.com.

F Gri

Grisham, John, author. The guardians. First edition. In a small Florida town, a young lawyer, Keith Russo, is shot to death as he works late. A young black man, a former client, named Quincy Miller is charged and convicted. For 22 years, Miller maintains his innocence from inside prison. Finally, Guardian Ministries takes on Miller's case, but Cullen Post, the Episcopal minister in charge, gets more than he bargained for. Powerful people murdered Russo-- they do not want Miller exonerated, and will kill again without a second thought. -- adapted from info provided and jacket info.

F Hil

Hilderbrand, Elin, author. Summer of '69. First edition. Welcome to the most tumultuous summer of the twentieth century. It's 1969, and for the Levin family, the times they are a-changing. Every year the children have looked forward to spending the summer at their grandmother's historic home in downtown Nantucket. But like so much else in America, nothing is the same: Blair, the oldest sister, is marooned in Boston, pregnant with twins and unable to travel. Middle sister Kirby, caught up in the thrilling vortex of civil rights protests and, determined to be independent, takes a summer job on Martha's Vineyard. Only-son Tiger is an infantry soldier, recently deployed to Vietnam. Thirteen-year-old Jessie suddenly feels like an only child, marooned in the house with her out-of-touch grandmother and her worried mother, each of them hiding a troubling secret. As the summer heats up, Ted Kennedy sinks a car in Chappaquiddick, man flies to the moon, and Jessie and her family experience their own dramatic upheavals along with the rest of the country.

F Jen

Jenoff, Pam, author. The lost girls of Paris. Library Exclusive Edition. "From the author of the runaway bestseller The Orphan's Tale comes a remarkable story of friendship and courage centered around three women and a ring of female secret agents during World War II.1946, Manhattan. One morning while passing through Grand Central Terminal on her way to work, Grace Healey finds an abandoned suitcase tucked beneath a bench. Unable to resist her own curiosity, Grace opens the suitcase, where she discovers a dozen photographs--each of a different woman. In a moment of impulse, Grace takes the photographs and quickly leaves the station. Grace soon learns that the suitcase belonged to a woman named Eleanor Trigg, leader of a network of female secret agents who were deployed out of London during the war. Twelve of these women were sent to Occupied Europe as couriers and radio operators to aid the resistance, but they never returned home, their fates a mystery. Setting out to learn the truth behind the women in the photographs, Grace finds herself drawn to a young mother turned agent named Marie, whose daring mission overseas reveals a remarkable story of friendship, valor and betrayal. Vividly rendered and inspired by true events, New York Times bestselling author Pam Jenoff shines a light on the incredible heroics of the brave women of the war and weaves a mesmerizing tale of courage, sisterhood and the great strength of women to survive in the hardest of circumstances"--Publisher's description.

F Jen

Jenoff, Pam, author. The orphan's tale. Sixteen-year-old Noa, forced to give up her baby fathered by a Nazi soldier, snatches a child from a boxcar containing Jewish infants bound for a concentration camp and takes refuge with a traveling circus, where Astrid, a Jewish aerialist, becomes her mentor.

F Maa

Sharon Maas. The Girl from the Sugar Plantation. 23 Sussex Road, Ickenham, UB10 8PN, United Kingdom : Bookouture.

F Maa

Sharon Maas. The Violin Maker's Daughter. Carmelite House, 50 Victoria Embankment London EC4Y 0DZ : Bookouture, 2019.

F Maas

Sharon Maas. The Lost Daughter of India. 23 Sussex Road, Ickenham, UB10 8PN United Kingdom : Bookouture.

F Mak

Makkai, Rebecca, author. The great believers. "A dazzling new novel of friendship and redemption in the face of tragedy and loss set in 1980s Chicago and contemporary Paris, by the acclaimed and award-winning author Rebecca Makkai. In 1985, Yale Tishman, the development director for an art gallery in Chicago, is about to pull off an amazing coup, bringing in an extraordinary collection of 1920s paintings as a gift to the gallery. Yet as his career begins to flourish, the carnage of the AIDS epidemic grows around him. One by one, his friends are dying and after his friend Nico's funeral, the virus circles closer and closer to Yale himself. Soon the only person he has left is Fiona, Nico's little sister. Thirty years later, Fiona is in Paris tracking down her estranged daughter who disappeared into a cult. While staying with an old friend, a famous photographer who documented the Chicago crisis, she finds herself finally grappling with the devastating ways AIDS affected her life and her relationship with her daughter. The two intertwining stories take us through the heartbreak of the eighties and the chaos of the modern world, as both Yale and Fiona struggle to find goodness in the midst of disaster"--.

F McC

A Peirogon : a novel. First Edition. New York, NY : Random House, 2020.

F Mic

Michaelides, Alex, 1977- author. The silent patient. First International Edition. Alicia Berenson's life is seemingly perfect. A famous painter married to an in-demand fashion photographer, she lives in a grand house with big windows overlooking a park in one of London's most desirable areas. One evening her husband Gabriel returns home late from a fashion shoot, and Alicia shoots him five times in the face, and then never speaks another word. Alicia's refusal to talk or give any kind of explanation turns a domestic tragedy into something far grander, a mystery that captures the public imagination and casts Alicia into notoriety. The price of her art skyrockets, and she, the silent patient, is hidden away from the spotlight of the tabloids at the Grove, a secure forensic unit in North London. Theo Faber is a criminal psychotherapist who has waited a long time for the opportunity to work with Alicia. His search for the truth leads him down a terrifying path and threatens to consume him.

F Ng

Ng, Celeste, author. Little fires everywhere.

F Old

Older, Daniel José, author. The Book of Lost Saints. First edition. "The spirit of Marisol, who vanished during the Cuban Revolution, visits her nephew, Ramon, in modern-day New Jersey, and her presence prompts him to investigate the story of his ancestor, unaware of the forces driving him on his search"--.

F Rem

Remarque, Erich Maria, 1898-1970. The road back. Random House Trade Paperback Edition, 2013. New York, NY : Random House Publishing, 2013.

F Ser

Rebecca Serle. The Dinner List. First U.S. Edition, September 2018. New York, NY : Flatiron Books, 2018.

F Ser

Serle, Rebecca, author. In five years : a novel. First Atria Books hardcover edition. "A striking, powerful, and moving love story following an ambitious lawyer who experiences an astonishing vision that could change her life forever"--. "When Type-A Manhattan lawyer Dannie Cohan is asked this question at the most important interview of her career, she has a meticulously crafted answer at the ready. Later, after nailing her interview and accepting her boyfriend's marriage proposal, Dannie goes to sleep knowing she is right on track to achieve her five-year plan. But when she wakes up, she's suddenly in a different apartment, with a different ring on her finger, and beside a very different man. The television news is on in the background, and she can just make out the scrolling date. It's the same night -December 15 -but 2025, five years in the future. After a very intense, shocking hour, Dannie wakes again, at the brink of midnight, back in 2020. She can't shake what has happened. It certainly felt much more than merely a dream, but she isn't the kind of person who believes in visions. That nonsense is only charming coming from free-spirited types, like her lifelong best friend, Bella. Determined to ignore the odd experience, she files it away in the back of her mind. That is, until four-and-a-half years later, when by chance Dannie meets the very same man from her long-ago vision."--Publisher website.

F Van

Vanderah, Glendy, author. Where the forest meets the stars. First edition. A mysterious child teaches two strangers how to love and trust again. After the loss of her mother and her own battle with breast cancer, Joanna Teale returns to her graduate research on nesting birds in rural Illinois, determined to prove that her recent hardships have not broken her. When a mysterious child who shows up at her cabin, barefoot and covered in bruises, Joanna enlists the help of her reclusive neighbor, Gabriel Nash, to solve the mystery of the charming child. But the more time they spend together, the more questions they have. How does a young girl not only read but understand Shakespeare? Why do good things keep happening in her presence? And why aren't Jo and Gabe checking the missing children's website anymore? Though the three have formed an incredible bond, they know difficult choices must be made.

F Vuo

Vuong, Ocean, 1988- author. On earth we're briefly gorgeous : a novel. "Brilliant, heartbreaking, tender, and highly original - poet Ocean Vuong's debut novel is a sweeping and shattering portrait of a family, and a testament to the redemptive power of storytelling. On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous is a letter from a son to a mother who cannot read. Written when the speaker, Little Dog, is in his late twenties, the letter unearths a family's history that began before he was born--a history whose epicenter is rooted in Vietnam--and serves as a doorway into parts of his life his mother has never known, all of it leading to an unforgettable revelation. At once a witness to the fraught yet undeniable love between a single mother and her son, it is also a brutally honest exploration of race, class, and masculinity"--.

F Whi

Whitehead, Colson, 1969- author. The nickel boys : a novel. First edition.

[Fic]

Gladstone, Max, author. Four roads cross. First edition. "The great city of Alt Coulumb is in crisis. The moon goddess Seril, long thought dead, is back--and the people of Alt Coulumb aren't happy. Protests rock the city, and Kos Everburning's creditors attempt a hostile takeover of the fire god's church. Tara Abernathy, the god's in-house Craftswoman, must defend the church against the world's fiercest necromantic firm--and against her old classmate, a rising star in the Craftwork world. As if that weren't enough, Cat and Raz, supporting characters from Three Parts Dead , are back too, fighting monster pirates; skeleton kings drink frozen cocktails, defying several principles of anatomy; jails, hospitals, and temples are broken into and out of; choirs of flame sing over Alt Coulumb; demons pose significant problems; a farmers' market proves more important to world affairs than seems likely; doctors of theology strike back; Monk-Technician Abelard performs several miracles; The Rats! play Walsh's Place; and dragons give almost-helpful counsel."--Syndetics.

R 943.086

The Holocaust chronicle. Lincolnwood, Ill. : Publications International, Ltd, 2009; 2017. The Holocaust Chronicle, written and fact-checked by top scholars, recounts the long, complex, anguishing story of the most terrible crime of the 20th century. A massive, oversized hardcover of more than 750 pages, this book features more than 2000 photographs, many of which are in full color and most are published in book form for the first time. The 3000-item timeline of Holocaust-related events is unprecedented in its scope and ambition and detailed caption-text is rich with facts and human interest.

SC Rus

Russell, Karen, 1981- author. Orange world : and other stories. First edition. The prospectors -- The bad graft -- Bog girl: a romance -- Madame Bovary's greyhound -- The tornado auction -- Black Corfu -- The Gondoliers -- Orange world. "From the Pulitzer finalist and universally beloved author of the New York Times best sellers Swamplandia! and Vampires in the Lemon Grove, a stunning new collection of short fiction that showcases her extraordinary gifts of language and imagination"--.

SC Rus

Russell, Karen, 1981-. Vampires in the lemon grove : stories. 1st ed. New York : Alfred A. Knopf, 2013.

SC S

Smith, Zadie, author. Grand union : stories. The dialectic -- Sentimental education -- The lazy river -- Words and music -- Just right -- Parents' morning epiphany -- Downtown -- Miss Adele amidst the corsets -- Mood -- Escape from New York -- Big week -- Meet the President! -- Two men arrive in a village -- Kelso deconstructed -- Blocked -- The canker -- For the King -- Now more than ever -- Grand union. "A dazzling collection of short fiction, more than half of which have never been published before, from the multi-award-winning author of White Teeth and Swing Time Zadie Smith has established herself as one of the most iconic, critically-respected, and popular writers of her generation. In her first short story collection, she combines her power of observation and inimitable voice to mine the fraught and complex experience of life in the modern world. With ten extraordinary new stories complemented by a selection of her most lauded pieces for The New Yorker, The Paris Review, and Granta, GRAND UNION explores a wide range of subjects, from first loves to cultural despair, as well as the desire to be the subject of your own experience. In captivating prose, she contends with race, class, relationships, and gender roles in a world that feels increasingly divided. Nothing is off limits, and everything--when captured by Smith's brilliant gaze--feels fresh and relevant. Perfectly paced, and utterly original, GRAND UNION highlights the wonders Zadie Smith can do"--. In her first short story collection, Smith combines her power of observation and inimitable voice to mine the fraught and complex experience of life in the modern world. She explores a wide range of subjects, from first loves to cultural despair, as well as the desire to be the subject of your own experience. In the stories Smith contends with race, class, relationships, and gender roles in a world that feels increasingly divided. -- adapted from jacket.

[naruhearts]

TFW, Jack Winchester & Peace of Mind...

[Dean, ext. in the Impala]

TAPE DECK: The key to quieting your mind, is minding your quiet.  [Dean pulls the tape out, throws it on the seat] —10x11 There’s No Place Like Home transcript ***

Seems like 14x15 Peace of Mind and its premise (the title, guys!) could link back to 14x09 (with all this narrative talk of quietness, tape decks, and using your words)—

x

—and 10x11 besides carrying over 14x14′s key themes of Life and Death, Family, Love and...Love, and Subtext in Storytelling.

In 10x11, Good Charlie faced Evil Charlie — the cunning and conniving (and Charlie herself was a mirror to MoC!Dean), yet she was so preoccupied with shame and guilt over her Dark mirror self that she overlooked something fundamental: the intrinsic dualism of the human condition. Say, being conniving as a hunter helps her save people. Yin and Yang. You cannot be good without evil, and you cannot be evil without good. Agency and free will matter, in that you choose which side to act on, and all the complex nuances in-between — doing something stupid (bad) for the right reasons — are the judges of your moral character. 

In Season Who Am I/Season Mirrors 14, Dean and Cas’ narrative arcs — both mirroring each other (since S12) — cycle back to this internal battle, where Dean saying Yes to Michael was a bad decision, yet it was a decision steeped in the good: his boundless love for his family and the larger safety of the world. Although he stated in 14x13 that he’s ‘good with who he is’ (and I don’t doubt the validity of it at all, because oh man it SHOWS, in almost every facet of his emotional states e.g. transparency with Cas re: his Michael-induced trauma and letting Sam separate himself from his shadow), Dean’s still experiencing a gradual uphill trek to achieving complete self-actualization after decades of John-bred negative self-process, low self-worth, and depression; it’s definitely logical to assume that Dean, at his core, will somehow blame himself for the slaughter of the AU Hunters by Michael!Rowena. 

But don’t worry — Dean’s character progression towards self-love is PALPABLY closer than it’s ever been in S14!! And we all know that, beyond his brother Sam, the key significant motivator for this is Cas: Dean’s subtextual spouse. The one he trusts wholeheartedly. The one who brought him back from the brink, many times. The one who fell for his humanity. The one who did it - all of it - for him. The one who believes Dean is ‘more than strong’/believes Sam and Dean (subtextually: DEAN) are extraordinary, brave, special, burn bright. The one who helps weed out the creeping vines of low self-worth, reminding Dean Humanity Winchester of his valuable lessons: that there is always a way, a better way, a hopeful way.

If death - if evil - still surfaces regardless of one’s perseverance and good intentions, “sometimes things just are; you have to live with that.” Most importantly--

x

Listen to your own advice, Dean.

Cas, on the other hand, struck up a deal with the Empty to protect Jack the TFW mirror. Shifting away from his sense of expendability and self-sacrifice (as the worthless means to a self-destructive end e.g. saying Yes to Lucifer, mirrored by Dean) in past seasons, Cas’ current choices (his choice to sacrifice himself for Jack) are, like Dean, steeped in Love and...Love — and Cas is very humanized this season, with an incredible scale of expressive emotions for an angel and vast internalization of overall human values and human morality — but his angelic self-awareness manifested in 14x14. This pivotal scene between Cas and his character exposition Jack showed audiences that Cas still perceives himself as a “thing” and, like Dean, Cas continues to feel the deep residue of expendability and duty as an ex-Angel of the Lord despite making recent positive characteristic leaps and bounds (his accrued trauma re: Naomi, for example, lurks in the back of Cas’ mind, reminding him of his sole purpose as Heaven’s blunt tool).

14x14’s narrative insight into Cas’ self-awareness of his position in the Winchester family as a supernatural entity (he’s put a lot of thought into knowing what may be in his future — losing Sam and Dean) hinders him from fully acknowledging and accepting the fact that he IS family. Not quite there, my friends, but he almost is.

Jack, yearning to be useful for his family, proclaimed himself a Winchester last episode in the manner most reflective and evocative of Cas, Dean and Sam’s own past choices (Michael, Lucifer, the Mark of Cain, Godstiel — you name it) (Jack’s helplessness was also visually symbolized when he turned into a “sick” dog, additionally closely mirroring Cas and particularly Dean’s duty-bound inclinations, then keeping in mind the connotations attached to Dog in the SPN narrative: expendability.)

Now it’s Jack’s turn to further find himself, sift through the respective TFW influences of faith, hope, and love (the three theological virtues represented by TFW) bestowed upon him, and “die” in order to live. Ouroboros. What path will Jack Winchester choose? What decision will he make? Is he the snake or the chicken? *Mind you, meta writers shivered in our boots once 14x14 aired*

In keeping Gorgon Noah’s snake, seemingly ‘killing’ Michael, and absorbing his grace to become a textually benevolent but subtextually ominous iteration of Godstiel while simultaneously saving his family, we can say Jack is both the chicken and the snake. Thus, in classic Winchester fashion, the effects — the benefits and consequences — of his actions shall reap important self-introspective lessons that Jack will eventually experience.

You can’t save everybody, but you can try to make choices that provide even the slightest chance of winning. If the last few key thematic episodes were any indication: faith, hope, love, and open honest communication (the latter exercised by Jack pretty liberally until Meta Extravaganza 14x14, when he dodged - again in classic Winchester fashion - his own family’s concerns via I’m FineTM) build up your resistance in a turbulent, uncertain world.

As TPTB has thematically reinforced through narrative cyclism and mirrored pathways over and over again during the past few seasons:

Self-love/positive self-process breeds life and rebirth. Self-hate/maladaptively negative self-process breeds death and destruction. To truly be human, we must live with both personal internal forces -- they are naturally interdependent. Self-hate pushes us to seek self-love. Personal imprisonment and control pushes us to break free and release ourselves from control in order to allow growth. Ultimately, life fluctuates and never stays static.

We are absolutely capable of choosing the good and acting on the good.

TFW, once they forgive ALL their faults and transform them into present/future strengths, will finally mind their quiet and have peace of mind. They’re going to realize that living a meaningful life involves the good and the bad. A dual balance of both is tantamount. Jack is the catalyst.

Everything means something.

[hanzi83]

Gang Stalking

It seems like the transparency is at an all time high than usual. It is a shame I cannot talk to my friends or family about these things personally. I have to go through different people who seem to politicize their position to me and it feels like overtures that are made are not genuine. I become frightened to talk to people I know, because they have thrown my mental illness back at me throughout my life. I am so fearful of all this and they know it, which is why people can be more transparent and get away with it. I wonder do they want me to flat out just state my theories, or are they trying to push me to suicide. I wonder if there is an investment for me to attempt it.

Let’s say whatever I have tweeted out or said in the past is true that I have been enlisted in a gang stalking program because they have just cause to do so if they can tell their superiors that they suspect someone such as myself to be a trouble maker because I am outspoken about my theories, when I should probably keep that on the low, but I am so far gone that it doesn’t matter anymore. No one believes these programs exist, because in media, television, movies etc, they present life as just people being normal for the most part and then there is a fringe conspiracy going on, but it is never showing you how everything is interconnected together to facilitate each other. It is like people are adamant in thinking that there is nothing beneath the surface, and even when they present something beneath the surface it comes within limits. So here is quick recap of what gang stalking is according to online sources, but keep in mind this could all just be some online propaganda I have probably felt for, but it seems like the secretive nature has made it so much more clearer over the last couple of years.

This is what I got from urban dictionary. It seems to resonate with me because it feels like it has been going on with me to some extent, but again I can’t prove it, and before someone points out I am reading something from online sites that have no merit, I realize it could all be bullshit, or maybe it is implemented online on purpose because it is supposed to catch traction. I am unsure, but again for all I know this is just my delusions kicking in.

Gang stalking is simply a form of community mobbing and organized stalking combined. Just like you have workplace mobbing, and online mobbing, which are both fully recognized as legitimate, this is the community form. 

Gang stalking is organized harassment at it's best. It the targeting of an individual for revenge, jealousy, sport, or to keep them quite, etc.  It's organized, widespread, and growing. Some describe this form of harassment as, "A psychological attack that can completely destroy a persons life, while leaving little or no evidence to incriminate the perpetrators."  2. Who gets targeted  The people getting targeted seem to be (single) woman, minorities, outspoken individuals, whistle blowers, dissidents, people who have gone against large corporations, etc.  3. Goals of this hate campaign.  The goal is to sensitize the target to stimuli, isolate the target, and make them destitute. The secondary goals seem to be to make the target homeless, jobless, give them a breakdown, and the primary goals seem to be to drive the target to suicide.  4. Who gang stalks? The surprising thing is that gang stalkers can be found in every level of society. There is no real age barrier, gender barrier, and a variety of races do participate. In almost every occupation in society you can find people who are going along with this.  Gang stalking for many is seen as a game, a sport to be played with another individuals life. Many do not understand or care that the end consequence of this game is to destroy a person.  5. Why they gang stalk.  "It is not conceivable that the participants in the harassment don't even know why the person has been targeted, nor would most of these individuals have any personal stake in harassing the victim.  - Gang stalking is an both an addictive behavior as well as a form of entertainment for the stalkers. There is a vicious kind of pleasure that they derive from bullying their victim. Clearly they like the feeling of being "in control".  Like our society's current obsession with "reality TV", this activity must inevitably gain popularity as the ultimate experience of "reality" entertainment. To the perpetrators, their targets are merely their prey, in a game that never ends. But make no mistake, whatever the reasoning behind it, this is a vicious and calculated hate crime."  -Others are blackmailed or forced into talking part in this activity.  -Others go along with it because they want to fit in and feel part of something that is large and powerful.  -Some are part of community groups who believe they are targeting an undesirable. -Some are part of the informant groups within cities.  6. Methods used against targets.  a) Classical conditioning.  Getting a target sensitized to sounds, colors, patterns, actions. Eg. Red, white, yellow, strips, pens clicking, key jangling, coughing, sneezing, whistling, fingerssnapping, clapping, etc.  b)24/7 Surveillance  This will involve following the target everywhere they go. Learning about the target, where they shop, work, play, who their friends and family are. Getting close to the target, moving into the community or apartment where they live, across the street, bugging targets phone, house, and computer activity.  c) Isolation of target.  This is done via slander campaigns, and lies. Eg. Saying the target is a thief, into drugs, a prostitute, pedophile, crazy, in trouble for something, needs to be watched. False files will even be produced on the target, shown to neighbors, family, store keepers.  d) Noise and mimicking campaigns.  Disrupting the targets life, sleep with loud power tools, construction, stereos, doors slamming, talking in public about private things in the targets life, and mimicking actions of the target. They are basically letting the target know that they are in the targets life. There is daily interferences, nothing that would be too overt to the untrained eye, but psychologically degrading and damaging to the target over time.  e) Everyday life breaks and street theatre.  There are flat tires, putting dirt on targets property. There are mass strangers doing things in public to annoy targets. These strangers might get text messaged to be at a specific time and place, and perform a specific action. If might seem harmless to these strangers, but it could be causing great psychological trauma for the target. They will do things like blocking targets path, getting ahead of them in line, cutting or boxing them in on the road, saying or doing things to elicit a response from targets. Etc.  Gang stalking is an illegal form of harassment.  However when targets seek help they still get quite a bit of resistance. Some people in today's society even try to pass gang stalking off as a form of paranoia, even though the meetings in Toronto are held out of the Toronto Rape Crisis Center and many woman's support groups and crisis centers are now aware of gang stalking, and even training their workers to deal with this form of harassment.  I have felt this has happened with me over the past several years, especially the more I resisted giving into the system, and now my reputation has been reduced to a guy in his mom’s basements who doesn’t do anything and is not relevant, even though they send people to harass me. I am not the only target apparently, but knowing that this is a possibility doesn’t sit well with me, and I can’t do anything about it, and people in my life can’t say anything and it gives them the luxury of using my own mental illness against me. It scares me that people I grew up with, or people I once respected could be forced to doing something so evil, and who is telling them to do it?

Every day I have to wake up and wonder what exactly is going on and pushing my mental stability to a next fucking level and whenever anything good happens to me seemingly, they will block me from ever getting anything because they need themselves to be a part of it. They will never explain how much association they have with other fucking people in the industry or the connections they have. I get tickets to a comedy show, and it becomes a big deal where it feels like I am coordinated not to be let there, because then I would ask questions and these people can’t answer them. It is becoming clearer that these people don’t really like me, but they still insist that I be here.

I ask you why? Why do you need me to be here? You will send trolls to give me generalizations of how important I am to the bigger goal, and then tell me things will be okay, but it won’t be okay because these people have already made me so deeply mentally ill and they have the luxury of pretending. No matter what I do, they win. I don’t say anything they get away with their secrecy yet transparency and even their snide remarks that are subtle to show off that there was a gathering I was not invited to, or having me out there so they can make money for recordings of me. I feel like they even have my old camera footage etc as well. I don’t know if any of this is true.

Who will believe me though? No one, certainly no one in the media, no one will touch this story because seemingly there is no proof to any of this. I don’t want to feel this way about people I knew but what other choice do I have, when all I get are generalizations of how much people I know love me and they want the best for me. It doesn’t seem like it. You are not happy with your connections, your new found friendships, and the community orgies you probably partake in, but you still have to make a mentally ill person feel even more mentally ill, where the only platforms he has he has to use as an excuse to bitch like middle school child lashing out about everything. The scary part is how many of these industry types, who know what is going on, just sit back behind the scenes and laugh at it, because that is how they cope with them being mental slaves to a bigger master, and need to take it out on others via sock puppet accounts and fake names so they can get away with saying the most fucked up things to someone.

I closed my twitter accounts. I closed my face book account. I know some people on Tumblr are seeing this, not very many followers on here but I am sure they will see this anyways. No one will address it because no one can admit they watch what I do or read what I am writing, but this won’t make a lick of difference. This is just designed for me to express it out there. Maybe if someone else gets to read this, it might help them if they are going through something familiar. No one will fucking ever help me out of this and whoever they send me to, will be under their choosing because they need to be in the loop with everything I think and say. They control that shit, but no one will ever fucking say anything about it and these seemingly well adjusted human beings who are in the media will just make you seem crazier and just laugh it off because they are the ones who are mentally ill.

I need to escape all of this and not care about wrestling, hip hop, politics, television, podcasts, movies, comedy etc and just never care about anything from all of this. I don’t want to partake in this anymore, especially when they have mentally submitted me for the last several years while my own friends and family show off how much I am out of the loop and don’t seem to care about me or how I react to this, and this is why I lash out in my personal journals, on social media, or in these blogs because I know they are watching, and I know they discuss it. Everyone who has a stake in this do it.

I feel I have nothing for myself anymore. Everything has been stolen from me. I could be wrong about every single thing, but even if I am not, I know it will always be designed to make me feel like I am wrong about everything. It will always feel like I am a part of some reality show. It feels like because I haven’t reached out to certain people, I am being punished full throttle and they have been making it more obvious about it. They really love making me feel like a piece of shit and will still find ways to do it. They will act nice and act civil, but there is barely any discussion to be had with me anymore. So I ask of you, can you please just let me go away and just have my peace. You already given all of this shit to others, and you have let people digitally harass me in an organized fashion. How much more do you want me to go through? Is this your goal? Is this your goal, for me to just attempt suicide? Is that how sick everyone who has partaken in this experiment is? People I grew up with would actually do this to me?

I don’t want to live to find out, but I have to be here because I am not going to be radicalized or let myself to succumb to hurting myself. I think about it a lot, and wonder to see if I did attempt it, would they let me go, or would they find a way to bring me back because they are the ones who decide when you leave, and as much as I want to, I will never do it. I just wonder if that is what their intention is with me.

Thanks a lot Howard. I know this makes you feel good for what you have done, but don’t worry because no one believes me when I say that a shock jock radio host has this much power and is connected higher up where he and others in your position can arrange for someone’s life to be made into even more shit and holding them back from even accomplishing anything, and then because it doesn’t work out for those people, they give up and it becomes more and more their fault, and you have this luxury to hide all of it and you can prosper in your mansion. I bet even the bad stuff posted about you is in limits. You probably don’t even care about the cats in your house, like the internet keeps perpetuating, just like the perpetuating of correlating your new asshole persona to becoming “liberal” when you are probably not a liberal, or making it look like a shit job so it gives liberalism a bad name, just like these corporate democrats that do, which is more leaning to the right.

No one will ever expose you. I am just a delusional one who keeps saying fucked up things. Don’t worry no one will ever believe a word I have said. I only have this creativity and I just killed more material I could have used in stand up, but it won’t fucking happen. I don’t even have freedom to go to a comedy club because they will send specific people to come harass me and it will make me look insane, and I am doing a good job at that myself. So you will always be the king of organizing this. I would ask if you feel any remorse but you clearly don’t have your soul with you anymore because you sold that a long time ago.

[z3norear]

ELEVENTH DAY. MORNING

O OMNIPRESENT ONE, beneath whose all-seeing eye our mortal lives are passed, grant that in all our deeds and purposes to-day we may behave with true courtesy and honour. Let us be just and true in all our dealings. Let no mean or low thought have a moments place in our mind. Let our motives be transparent to all. Let our word be our bond. Let us take no unchivalrous advantage of anybody. Let us be generous in our judgment of others. Let us be disinterested in our opinions. Let us be loyal to our friends and magnanimous to our opponents. Let us face adversity with courage. Let us not ask or expect too much for ourselves.

Yet, O Lord God, let us not rest content with such an ideal of manhood as men have known apart from Christ.

O Thou whose love to man was proven in the passion and death of Jesus Christ our Lord, let the power of His Cross be with us to- day. Let us love as He loved. Let our obedience be unto death. In leaning upon His Cross, let us not refuse our own, yet in bearing ours, let us bear it by the strength of His.

O Thou who hast set the solitary in families, we crave Thy Heavenly blessing also for all the members of this household, all our neighbour's, and all our fellow citizens. Let Christ rule in every heart and His law be honored in every home. Let every knee be bent before Him and every tongue confess that He is Lord. Amen.

ELEVENTH DAY. EVENING

O MERCIFUL heart of God, in true penitence and contrition we would now open our heart to Thee. Let us keep nothing hidden from Thee, while we pray. Humbling as the truth about ourselves maybe, let us yet take courage to speak it in Thy Presence. What we did not think shame to commit, that let us not think shame to confess. And in Thy wisdom use this pain of confession as a means to make us hate the sins confess.

I confess to the sin of laziness in this .....and this.....:

I confess to the sin of vanity in this...and this.....:

I confess to this.....and this.....indulgence of the flesh:

I confess to the habit of falsehood in this .....and this .....:

I confess to this.....and this.....dishonesty:

I confess to this.....and this.....uncharitable word:

I confess to having harbourd this.....and this.......evil thought:

I confess to this .....and this.....wrong direction our life has been taking:

I confess to this.....and this.....lapse from faithful religious practice.

O Thou whose love can be in the heart of man as a fire to burn up all that is shameful and evil, let us now lay hold upon Thy perfect righteousness and make it our own. Blot out all our transgressions and let our sins be covered. Make us to feel Thine hand upon our life, cleansing us from the stain of past misdeeds, loosing us from the grip of evil habits, strengthening us in new habits of pure- heartedness, and guiding our footsteps in the way of eternal life. Lead us in battle, O God, against our secret sins. Fence round our life with a rampart of pure aspiration. And let Christ be formed in our heart through faith. All this we ask for His Holy namesake. Amen.

A DIARY OF PRIVATE PRAYER. JOHN BAILLIE

[gigageekmag]

Comic Book Review: Calico

CALICO ISSUE #1

Welcome back GiGa Community; as you all know, at fifteen years old, in 1992, I had an opportunity and pleasure of interning at Marvel Comics in Manhattan, New York; Spider-man office to be exact.  It was during that year that I had delved into the comic book industry, soaking it all in, down to my very fabric of my soul.  I loved all of the intellectual properties, their stories, and the craft; I knew I wanted Comics to be a part of my future life story.   I was a fan of some characters, and ambivalent to others, but never the less, just like family I loved them all (Some more than others of course); the environment moved my soul.  To this day, I still find being an artist to be one of my first loves, and comic books satisfied that yearning.  The culmination of efforts between a writer, penciler, inker, letterer, colorist, and editor was to me, an amalgamation of geniuses at work.  I love and respect the craft.

Sigma Comics

GiGa: GeekMagazine was contacted by Sigma Comics asking for an honest review of their newly released comic series, Calico.  I was unsure of who this new IP was that was entering the competitive arena, so I did superficial research, watched an interview, and a review; it seemed to be worth the read.   The first complimentary comic came and as busy as I am, I opened it and felt the cover art seemed acceptable for a comic book in 2021, but I didn’t have a peaceful undisturbed moment to read it, so I left it on my desk to be ready for the day I found a free opportunity to read it, then write a review.  My family and I left the house for a few hours, and when I returned I went straight to my office and hadn’t realized the comic was no longer on my desk.  A few seconds after I sat down, my daughter calls me, “Papi, look what Ivi did”!

Ivi Snow knew She really did it this time.

Ivi Snow is one of my two white German Shepherds, she is 1½ years old, so I am accustomed to finding “surprises” when we come back home; I thought it was poop again. A minute later my daughter comes to my office holding my complimentary issue of Calico in shreds.  Needless to say I was peeved and Ivi knew it. Then I remembered what the premise of the comic was.  “NYC HAS A NEW ANTI–HERO. Every day millions of animals are abused and killed. Animal rights groups and charities try to help, yet the savagery continues.”  Sigma Comics appears to be committed to fighting animal abuse. I laughed at the irony of this moment and took a picture of her with the destroyed comic, apparently, she enjoyed the comic.  I couldn’t read it, as a substantial part of the first few pages were now gone.  With that above picture attached to an email to Sigma comics, I humbly apologized and requested another review copy, I was willing to pay for it at this point, but the great people at Sigma found humor in the event as well and sent me another. When the next copy arrived I kept it in my safe this time, and that night when I was done with work, I read it before I went to bed.  I opened the cover and this time, I was able to really absorb the content.   I applauded the first impression, it was transparent in showing their allegiance to the cause, “American Humane”, as a parent to two German Shepherds, I was sold. 

The first page was gripping, showing an example of the atrocities committed upon animals and the visualization was almost too tough to bear, but I was roped in, I had to read on.  We get our first glimpse into the soul of our Anti-Hero on page two, with tears running from angry eyes, the penciler, inker, and colorist nailed the conviction this character was driven by, and we’re then introduced to Calico “A one-man arsenal of destruction in constant pursuit of justice for the smallest and weakest among us…” 

In his apartment he works his frustration on a double end bag, his thoughts speak poignant commentary as to the nature of life being nothing but conflict in every facet of existence and we see where his psychological state dwells; he’s scared and/or resentful of life and bitterly expresses this in his own twisted way.  The Boxing Gym advertisement on page 5 could easily be dismissed as fictitious until a little research clarified that it is indeed a real business; as an ex-fighter boxer, martial artist, and ex-body guard myself, I respected that blurring between fantasy and reality as it was perfectly in line with the tale that I was uploading to my brain.

The writer then takes the reader on a journey through the life of Calico, recalling childhood memories of being bullied.  This alludes to post traumatic damage; he hates bullies and had long since made the decision to suffer them no longer.  We next accompany the protagonist from his apartment to a local boxing gym where he trains and prepares for an upcoming tournament, and while there, he loses himself in the art of combat.  His thoughts become louder than spoken words; he’s a fighter with unfortunate luck, struggling skill, and lots of animosity.  Here is where the reader learns this character has no reservation about the thought of condemning the abuser to death and that animals were his only friends since his youth.

Page 8 we’re given a full frontal nude of the hero in the shower after leaving the gym, even in the shower he’s consumed by antipathy as conveyed by more flashbacks of the same bully from his youth; he’s never recovered from those years.  This memory was different, ironically, it was in this recollection where he was impressed by an alley-cat that scared off the bully and his dog, which serves as a perfect transition into revealing his super-hero outfit emblazoned with a black cat’s profile in front of what appears to be a moon.  He also has a flying robotic AI assistant named Bumble that is a metallic sphere with one camera eye. Then, we’re back to his childhood memories, this time he evokes the very first time he inflicted pain by punching that bully in the face before fleeing the scene.  Page 13 is where things escalate quickly, so I won’t spoil it for interested readers.

So here’s my honest review and rating:

Comic book Production:   I feel the writing could have been more impacting and/or expansive; a name would have been nice to have, but it served its purpose; The art is what communicated the story the most.  Lettering was great, the penciling and inking were acceptable as well, but gets a little hard to understand what’s happening during the murder scene.   

The Character: His real name is never revealed, but from how Calico was insultingly called a “Dominican York” translated from Spanish, he is likely Latino. I think the character is less anti-hero and more of a deranged, sociopathic, villain with post-traumatic stress. He’s fed a list of targets by an unknown accomplice, he intends to kill, (and/or violate) which to me is the modus operandi of a serial killer. I couldn’t see the word “Hero” being applicable to this guy in anyway.

The full frontal nude, to me, was unnecessary, but being a student at the Art Institute of Atlanta I’ve drawn male nudes before, so I respect the art, 100%.  That scene only became awkward after the second penis comment. Which helped me to get a better understanding  of the mind of the protagonist as portrayed and communicated by the writer. I think the outfit really is too similar to Black Panther.

As per the multiple male phallus related comments and insults, along with, what I found to be excessive homo-erotic language, it seemed in my humble opinion, as if there’s other unresolved issues besides being bullied that Calico has never addressed.   In one scene, I had to look at one scene under better light to understand that Calico actually violates or rapes his victim with a red hot pipe, all while making references to size; he says to his victim, “Relax! It’s only one-inch thick pipe. In penis size its only four-inch girth. You got this”.  the last unnecessary thing I read that really nailed the coffin shut for me was the statement, “F*** em. Hard. in the @ss. With no vaseline”.

Concept: I personally, don’t think the character could have longevity, and if so possibly as a novelty act; appropriate for an 8-Issue Series. He possibly may develop a fan base, but with a very niche market.  He is not a “Deadpool” type of anti-hero, I’d say this brooding character is damaged psychologically which easily could bleed over into villainy. I couldn’t see the Dark Knight tolerating this character, or working with him in any way, and would probably bring him to justice.  In comparison to other anti-heroes, such as Hulk, Ghost Rider, Blade, or the Punisher, I’d say even Frank Castle wouldn’t see his motivations, means, or ends as acceptable.  I see a more deviant sociopathic “Joker” kind of weirdness from Calico minus the smiles and laughing.

Conclusion:  It’s a comic book, it fits the criteria. I wasn’t left feeling like I want to read more, but I am only one man, with one opinion worth 2 cents.  I endeavor to say it could have been written for a broader appeal to a wider audience; for me, I feel the niche-aspect will leave some put off or uninterested.  But somehow, I’m sure this will pull the targeted audience it was meant for.  In the end, Sigma successfully this debut is a great accomplishment for the creators and production team and for that I salute and respect their creative vision, hard work, and love for the craft.  I’d give it 3 out 5 Stars ★★★☆☆ ~Jack~

Image Sources: > https://sigmacomics.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/sigma-comics-large.jpg > https://prnewswire2-a.akamaihd.net/p/1893751/sp/189375100/thumbnail/entry_id/1_gapzb7c1/def_height/800/def_width/520/version/100011/type/1

Comic Book Review: Calico was originally published on GIGA: GeekMagazine

[wingsandneedles]

May I?

Because I’m gonna. I’ve been reading through some reviews and thoughts about ACoWar and figured, fuck it, why not? I have a few things I want to say, too... Strap in, kids, its gonna be a long one.

Feyre - I understand that people are upset with the way she left the Spring Court even more vulnerable to Hybern, and I just don’t care. At the time she was behind enemy lines and undermining the people hellbent on destroying a continent. Maybe if Tamlin had actually been as honest with her as he had promised to be about his plans this time around, she would have figured out another way to leave? I don’t know.

She’s also getting shit for doing her own thing, making deals and sneaking around and lying. Guess what. That’s part of being a ruler. It’s nice that the Night Court can have a fun family atmosphere but this isn’t Chuck E Cheese. From a purely objective standpoint, if everyone in the novel was completely transparent the damned thing would have been 400 pages. Not to mention that she is still fairly new at having a support network like this, or putting her friends in harm’s way. Of course she’s going to play shit close to the chest and leave them out of danger as much as she can. Sheesh.

Rhysand - Oh, my sweet sugar. Mostly on him I’m reading complaints about his dealings with Beron, Eris, and Keir. Guess what. Its a war. You have to make deals with people you can’t stand sometimes to ensure the survival of your home. Is it pretty? No. Will people get hurt? Yes. And then you move on. Were the armies of the sadistic bastards crucial to the success of, you know, everything? Hell yes. Even with all the forces mustered things were touch-and-go for a while. Every. Fighter. Mattered. Could he have handled the situation with Morrigan better? Yeah, probably. He’s not perfect, though, he knows that. 

Also, what’s the hostility about with he and Feyre either getting along too well or snapping and snipping at each other all the time (I’ve seen both complaints today) Let’s not forgot that while they love each other fiercely, this is still a new relationship. Now that they are firmly cemented together, why wouldn’t they get along and support each other? Do you want all-angst-all-the-time or a functional relationship that doesn’t rely on drama and heartache to thrive? Flipside, though it is a wonderful bond, it is also like any other relationship. I love my husband with a passion that could level cities but that doesn’t mean we don’t bicker and bitch at each other on occasion.

Basically, I love him. From the tips of his wings all the way down. I love him. 

Amren - There are no words, none, for the sound I made when her history was revealed. I woke up my daughter. It wasn’t cute. And I loved, loved, loved her more for what she is, what she was.

That being said, I think she should have died. Or stayed dead, I suppose. There is a fine line between killing-every-character-so-don’t-get-attached-to-any and knowing that everybody-will-survive-so-no-worries. It’s part of what I love about Rowling, really, that she was so good at knowing when sacrifices to the literary gods needed to be made. And I think that the fact that we made it through this book and the only real casualty we were left with were Papa Archeron and the bargain-caught-monsters was bullshit. Amren’s death was beautiful. Her popping back out of that Cauldron made the whole thing seem, just, less. Rhys’ resurrection I’m fine with because it very prettily mirrored Feyre’s, but come on. Sometimes things should stay dead.

Morrigan - Fuck her. Fuck this. Fuck it. Went from one of my most beloved members of the Court to my absolute dead last least favorite. Not because she’s gay. Couldn’t care less about that, actually. But because this little piece of bullshit storytelling turned a woman who had been fucked up and fucked over and still maintained her love of life, her passion, her beautiful, vibrant self, and made her into a cowardly, hateful, weasel. There. I said it. I don’t give a shit about your past or your motivations. If someone loves you with all their heart and soul and that shit just isn’t ever going to happen for you, you let them know. What you don’t do is string them along for 500 fucking years because you don’t want to shatter their feelings or their hope. Especially when you’re supposed to be their friend, their family, their anything. I wouldn’t do that shit to my worst enemy. I’m not saying she had any responsibility to tell everyone she wandered all over the sexuality spectrum, that’s her call to make. I’m saying that this. is. fucked. Especially when she values honesty so much from everyone else. Hypocritical cow. 

Cassian - Awww. He tries so hard. No complaints. He seems to be in love with a bitch, but that’s his issue. 

Azriel - And here we have my new bestie. I loved learning more about him and watching him with Elaine. I don’t care if they end up together, I just liked seeing his kindness and his compassion. Who says it always has to be about romance, anyway? Can we not just be friends, pulling each other out of the darkness when we can? 

Nesta - Honey needs to be called out on her shitty attitude more often. Being a raging bitch as a defense mechanism gets old when you are surrounded by people that will sacrifice everything for your safety and happiness. I like that she was starting to warm up by the end. Taming of the shrew, and all that. 

Elaine - Ugh. What a waste. We are given the chance at an amazing seer and instead she fades into the background almost immediately after they figure out that she’s not just looped in the head. Poor, sad flower. 

Lucien - Meh. Don’t have strong feelings one way or another, really. My happiness doesn’t hang on his, ya know? At this point I’m honestly more interested in learning more about Eris. 

Tamlin - I never really had a problem with him in this book. He’s a dick. But he’s not evil. It’s possible to be a shitty boyfriend and a decent person.

I’m sure there’s more that I wanted to say. About the other Lords, and the humans, and all of that. The setting up for other books that seemed to take precedence over telling this story at times. The sudden influx of a billion new characters to explore later. My enjoyment and delight at Ianthe getting repeatedly fucked up and fucked over. Love, love, loving the Carver, Stryga, and Bryaxis. My joy that there weren’t any surprise! pregnancies to deal with. But that’s all I can think of right now. Maybe I’ll write more later. I’m almost sure nobody is gonna read all this rambling nonsense, anyway. Alas.

[aaquollaa]

Farewell Black Sails

And that’s a wrap. Land of SPOILERS (until the broadcast anyway).

I’m going to miss starting off my Sundays watching this show on my little tablet while tucked into bed. I’m pretty satisfied with this send-off, some things more than others, of course. I’m going to be pondering it for a while. A few thoughts:

Treasure Island: I’ll be excited to revisit the book and think about that story both with and without this extra narrative of the show. It’s a nice place to leave Black Sails as representing a relatively short moment in history where we know the story continues to the benefit and detriment of our players. I came to appreciate the show outside of the book (that I barely read a long, long time ago, and thought was just okay). Mission accomplished on helping bring it to life in a different way for those of us who find that appealing.

Madi and Silver: I love those two so much. There’s such authenticity to their relationship and how they love and struggle through the ways that they’ve come to value each other, despite coming from different perspectives. The interspersed scenes during the battle where we got to see Silver making his way to learn Madi’s fate worked for me, even if it was a little transparent. As a viewer, I was pretty sure she was alive, but I enjoyed watching those emotions play out through Silver. It really hit me in the heart, both watching him think he was too late to save her and also watching her unmoving as this battle is going on around her, seeming to have considered her death inevitable.

It’s interesting that both Flint and Madi kind of forced Silver’s hand—neither asked him to choose per se, but instead to act (Hands too). Flint did so when he unilaterally accepted Eleanor’s bargain; Madi when she said he needed to neutralize Billy. Yet Silver also listened too, especially when Madi said that they could make a life without the cache if they willed it so. So he did act, just not as expected.

In the moment, I was kind of annoyed at his paternalism. I am still wavering about it. But I think Flint and Madi were the impetus for it and enabled it so I can let it go. I didn’t doubt that she’d forgive him for going behind her back. She was never really like either Flint or Silver. I see her as not mad about the outcome because she understands the advantages of it and the counsel behind it from Ruth, her parents, even Flint and Silver in their own way. It’s the betrayal that hurt, and Rogers and Eleanor were instructive on that too. She can accept it because despite her belief in her cause, she also values that having the love of Silver, her family, her people her home is a victory too. I love the validation that there are lessons from all of our experiences, both good and bad.

Max and Silver: A nice parallel for their characters based on where they started as partners. It’s a testament to how well this show handles internal histories and arcing. Their conversation right after the pirates took Nassau seemed to be a turning point for both: figuring out what they could live with in the name of ambition and make solid choices and sacrifices to see them through. Also, did Max orchestrate sending Mary Reade to Jack and Anne? I’ve enjoyed that trio so much in this run.

Billy: Sucks for him. He really could have gotten everything he wanted if he’d calmed TF down. But his downfall was his short-sightedness. I always liked him, thought him smarter than what he ended up being. In the end, he couldn’t see past his bitterness over Flint, even as everyone else attempted to play the long game.

Woodes Rogers: I never hated him per se, but I always knew he was doomed both because of actual history and because someone drinking that much of their own kool aid is bound to fail at some point (just like Flint in the end). It was satisfying to see Flint further break down his military legacy while Rackham got the last word on his narrative (for a while at least). And he lost Eleanor, a relationship I was never sold on in the first place (especially because I hated Eleanor from jump—it’s fitting that she didn’t survive this because she didn’t deserve to live in this new world for never truly serving its best interests over her own).

Flint and Silver: The friend who introduced me to this show is a huge fan of their dynamic. I’ll be interested to get her take. I find their arc fascinating, but it was never the main draw for me. But I like that they played with the idea of who sees who through the dark times in a friendship that was hard-earned. At the end of the day it’s a blurry back and forth and probably doesn’t even matter.

Flint: Did he come out of this too neatly? Maybe. But I’m okay with it. In terms of weaving a compelling story, I like the idea of him revisiting who he used to be by physically returning to the most positive and motivating influence on him. I’m a sucker for that kind of shippiness. But I’m also interested in how deviants reenter into society and what debts they have to pay to be in it. So in that sense, this ending is a fascinating one.

Nassau: So where does that leave Nassau? What Silver did was essentially enabled the status quo to return, and that’s the problem I had with his paternalism. Yes there were benefits for the Maroons and pirates and Nassau but the stakes for him were personal ones. That makes me uncomfortable. What of that spirit of revolution and fighting back against the corrupting powers of colonial rule? And so much could have gone wrong. But maybe it isn’t the status quo. Nassau IS changed, who runs it and has power within it (I love what Max, Featherstone and Idelle’s role implicate here). I think back to what both the Queen and Julius said at different times. Their plan sought to change the world all at once and that is kind of foolish--there’s room for more than one strategy. Expansive civilization isn’t all good but it’s not all bad either, and we can make progress to reshaping it towards the good in whatever ways we can. We can make steps to create peace and prosperity for a short time, make it more inclusive, live with who you love and make a life for yourself. It may not be revolutionary, but it is progress and Nassau ended up seeing that eventually.

This show really was like reading a good book, in tone and language and narrative. Even seconds after watching, I missed it. It’s definitely on my top ten best.

[minseologs]

pinocchio

tw// heavy violent themes, substance abuse, death 

Fake it ‘till you make it. A saying that one must say if they’re trying to achieve something unrealistic in their own means of a dream for motivation. To Minseo, it simply means going along with her family’s beliefs while still maintaining a subtle rebellious thought against them. 

It worked for a while, until she started questioning who she really was.

~ 

My expressions and attitude lack transparency, Nobody sees through my fake attitude. I’m used to lying. Where has my innocence gone?

“What, you think we’re scared because you have money? We all have money. That’s why you’re top of the class again.” the hand of her senior classmate pushes her, another two by her side in support. Minseo wasn’t quite sure how she got in this situation, but she knew it was bad. “Yah- Choi Minseo, why are you like this? Are you a puppet? Because you’re weak. That’s what you are. You’re nothing compared to us so just say you cheated on the test.” A short stifle of laugh was heard, ticking off this girl. They question her once again, a more aggressive push that Minseo was sent to the ground. 

This wasn’t the first time she was ever bullied for any sense at all. She was an easy target for this school’s bully as she never fought back, never said anything wrong to anyone, and always kept to herself. She was a model student, good grades and participated in extracurricular activities. When Hyeseo was on this ladder, it was expected of the younger Choi that she must be the same but it wasn’t the case. She was labeled timid and unlike any of the cunning family members. 

Years of pent up anger and bottled emotions have built up to this. This damn school. The damn money-eating higher ups. She stands up, wiping her skirt of the dirt from the ground. And with that her hand punches her square in the face. The girls were stunned, it was now 3 against one if you can count her to stand up after that. Hair was pulled, bodies were kicked. One can tell Minseo was losing, but she didn’t give up. Her hands grappled whoever was the closest, kicking them in the stomach, and another one to the other just to keep them at bay to focus on the senior bully. Because the moment she could get an upper hand, she wasted no time to pour her frustration to that girl. She sat on her stomach, the punches to her face left and right. The finale was herself shaking her down to the ground multiple times, and blood had pooled around them that it pulled her back to her senses, but she had the strong urge to actually go on.

Did I kill her?

A forming smirk had plastered on her lips, leaning down at the barely responsive person under her as the other girls were too afraid to fight off this once used to be a weak one. “I see you mess with anyone in this school again, I will do this shit again to you. Tell all of the adults for all I care, because who will they believe? Worry about your self and stay out of my way, you bitch.” 

She walks away with the feeling of adrenaline on her veins, her hands were bruised, cut-- and trails of blood had gotten on her. It looked like she was the one who was beaten up at the point she was found by the family chauffeur. Of course she wasn’t let off easy. But because of her family background, they could make amends and ensure everyone’s name was out of anyone’s speculations. She was placed under private watch, with after school community work. Her father wasn’t mad, in fact, he was a bit proud her own daughter could fight back. Minseo was disgusted at the thought she was encouraged. Since then, everyone respected her. As her name buzzes around this incident, maybe it was fear that prevented her from forming genuine friendships.

But she couldn’t stop thinking about how it felt. The power. The fear of the other. It was almost as if she wanted to do it again. Or wont hesitate to do it again. 

~ 

My black lies beyond my white smile. I pretend as if it’s the truth, as if I’m sincere. I conceal the truth even deeper inside me. I might lose the real me.

She was smiling quite well, an arm on her father as the pictures are taken of yet another publicity stunt for the family’s future endeavors with the locals. As soon as they have left, it was back to the spite they’ve carried to one another. Silence brought over the ride other than the usual work reports. They live in the same house, yet it was just wind that carried them along if it wasn’t the small talks and obeying orders. They had just finished another deal in what they disguised as a charity event. 

“That’s why they call it charity.” her eyes go over at the housemaid she had befriended, another one before they quit the family, to say the least. “If money truly never made anyone happy, why would they do charities?”

“Ma’am, I think it’s because it’s in the goodness of their hearts.” her voice responds carefully, which catches her eye. The maid was careful to lay out the clothes she will wear for the after-event meeting, it was a custom to ensure everyone is still in the same page. “You do charities to give back or give the less fortunate the chance to be able to have something that’s considered nothing to you, but a luxury to them.”

Minseo felt a sense of comfort to her words, because she too, felt this. Everything she had done for the good of the family was because she wanted to make up things she couldn’t as far as her family’s irreversible doings other than the sole purpose of giving back. Everything was a privilege. 

“...Ma’am, I am sure your family means well.”

“No... No they don’t.”

~ 

The after-event meeting took place at another rich man’s place, one who conducted many illegal transports of drugs to the country. Her father was acquired because they do the same deeds except it was firearms not accessible to most. They made a deal for a couple months about exchanging links in other countries as the drugs are being transported within the firearm transports. It works out well for everyone. The charity event was to cover up public records, in which this case is that they are disguised as building materials for a future arts building somewhere. Minseo was one of the appointed finance seers, hence her presence in the meeting. 

Anywhere you look, the grandeur was present. It was vulgar, too. Many people having their own highs with strangers, the orgies are all because of what was in their system-- the rest want nothing but to be left in their alcohol streaks. The place smelled so much of everything that she cannot pinpoint what it was. Her father and the said man were shaking hands near by, of a new partnership, as she bids herself to the side and gets ready for the meeting in a hallway, away from all the things she hated to see. 

Minseo was minding her own business to the side until she is called, but was interrupted of her silence when a man at the end of the hallway, suddenly collapses. She calmly investigates as she had assumed this person was probably having an overdose, and she was right. The closer she got, the man was frothing up his mouth, his cries of help slowly dissipate as his nose bled. As she loomed over the body’s demise, they made eye contact briefly and that’s when she knew.

“....Seo... Minse...o...” he calls out. It was the son of a family friend. They were strong in the agriculture side of the country. “h..help..” 

Expressionless, she doesn’t move. She watches this man die in front of her. Unfortunately, no one can know this place, everyone knew that including this man. She doesn’t call for help either because anyone in this place were their own responsibility. They know the temptation that can get you, so if you got greedy, you’re on your own. Minseo’s only thought is what public announcement the family would make of his overdose. She reaches out to close his eyes, before walking away from the scene

Deep down, she wished she could’ve done something. Anything. 

~

Standing between love and business, I don’t even know my real intentions. My unconsciousness is like poison to me. My craving for innocence strangles me.

“You’re kidding me.” She looks at her assistant, sighing in disbelief that they added another day for her monthly Japan meetings. “It’s been two days, they can handle the rest.”

“I am so sorry ma’am. But your sister’s presence was requested in Shanghai so she can’t make it to Tokyo for one day.” 

She rolls her eyes, sighing again to express her frustrations. She dismisses everyone and gets on her phone for a video chat, dialing the home phone where a soft voice picks up. Her son, Jinwoo.

“Mommy!!!~~~ Are you on your way back?” that sweet, sweet call. There was not a day that she misses her son. The one to give her a sunny day on her worst. “Mommy! Are you bringing chocolate jellies?” 

“Yes my love... I am.” She smiles through the phone, though a bit sad to deliver the news. “But mommy has to stay another day... Auntie Hyeseo can’t cover her stuff for tomorrow so I have to handle it.”

At home, Jinwoo was surrounded with the housemaids. For safety and to prevent loneliness. Though his mother tries to be there for him all the time, the child still feels disappointed waiting another day for her to come back. He had always hated her ‘plane rides’ because it would mean she would be gone longer. He pouts, and Minseo pouts too.

The call went on for hours, he tells her about his day, and so does she. They shared a bond that always made Minseo forget everything she had done terribly of her life, and that everything was okay. It was the best thing that ever happen to her despite of their circumstance as a family. Even if it’s like this, she made sure Jinwoo receives all the love he deserves, and more.

~ 

Her reflection was so... so. Minseo had been in deep thought of her life, a crisis as one can say. She stares at the mirror with regret, fear, disappointment. Her thoughts invade the pondering on her face. Who are you? Why are you here? Which side did you choose? 

Her thought was interrupted by a knock on the door, a housemaid preparing what she will wear for the gala. The gala where a money-laundering scheme was built on. The intentions are genuine, but her father had held her by her throat to use it as an excuse to hide his crimes. She looks at her reflection, her brows furrow and her eyes tear up. But it was a split second and she sits up straight then smiles. 

It was just a smile. Just a smile. 

~

Real intentions hidden under a smiling mask. My gaze has gone cold. The lies I tell you expressionless. I’m used to this. 

I’m used to this

I’m used to this.

[rathertoofondofbooks]

Today I’m delighted to welcome author Kate Vane back to my blog. Kate has written a fab post all about how spending too much time on social media inspired her new novel, Still You Sleep!

A lot of us lament the time we spend on social media. It is habit forming and time can race by with nothing to show for it. Then there is all the anger. At times it can feel like an endless line of people queueing up to shout roughly the same thing in your face, one after another.

However, it wouldn’t have become a habit if we didn’t get something from it. I feel I’ve gained in many ways from social media – discovering books and authors I would never otherwise have heard of, connecting with likeminded readers from across the world. I’ve been amused and entertained, and have learnt from people who share their expertise in a pleasingly eclectic range of subjects – from medieval history to birdwatching. It has also inspired elements of my new novel, Still You Sleep.

In Still You Sleep the death of Vikki Smith, a young woman with a learning disability, becomes the subject of hateful social media messages. Like many people I’ve become increasingly dismayed by social media trolling and found it hard to ignore. I wanted to explore the different reasons why people do it, from resentment, to conviction, to just wanting to join in a pile-on.

One element of the plot involves tracking down the trolls and understanding their motives. This isn’t just about the instigators, I wondered what drives the people who join in someone else’s fight? And what about the people who argue against them, but in the process amplify their message? Is this naivety or are they promoting an agenda of their own?

It was also around this time I happened across stories of people buying and selling opioids on the dark web. I saw the footage of one particularly chilling police interview. The convicted man was polite and articulate, explaining how he ran his business – carefully weighing the drugs and sending them out by post and even issuing a ‘buyer beware’ message on his webpage. He was saving up to go to university. He might as well have been selling T-shirts.

This in turn sent me off to learn more about the dark web as I knew this was something I wanted to explore: people who don’t fit the popular stereotype of the drug dealer but whose actions can still have deadly consequences. What were the thought processes that made them think that was alright?

My protagonists are journalists. Tilda Green is an online activist-journalist at the start of her career, and Freddie Stone is a redundant crime reporter, struggling to come to terms with a fast-changing industry. They each bring different skills to investigating Vikki’s death and the people who appear to be exploiting it.

Journalists are, of course, among the biggest users of social media, Twitter in particular, so following them has been a great resource in terms of current issues, methods and insider gossip.

When I was growing up, I had no idea where ‘the news’ came from. It emerged from the box in the living room and was beyond question. I’m sure most adults probably thought the same thing. Unless you knew a journalist, or had been personally involved in a news story, you probably had very little idea about what they did.

Nowadays, journalists are much more transparent about their processes and sources than they used to be. They talk online about everything from technological change to a recent impassioned Twitter debate on whether a journalist still needs shorthand. I’ve worked in media teams and know a few journalists, but social media helps me keep up with current media culture and concerns.

I think social media is like any real-life public space. Sometimes it’s fun, sometimes it’s boring, occasionally, against your will, you’re forced into contact with people who are unpleasant or even dangerous. Unfortunately, it’s those people who often make the most noise and can be hard to avoid.

It’s not only a resource for research but a place where dramas play out. As such it makes sense to me to write about it in fiction.

  About the Book

Why wasn’t she safe at home?

Vikki Smith was a young woman with a learning disability, living independently for the first time, when she died of a drug overdose.

The police think it could have been an accident, but messages on social media suggest someone was exploiting her death for their own ends – before it was even announced. Her mother is convinced it was murder.

Redundant crime reporter Freddie Stone is a family friend. He wants to help them – and his failing career – but he’s a people person. He asks online journalist Tilda Green to work with him.

Tilda is curious, passionate and runs her own campaigning news site. She’s open to everything except compromise. But she’s intrigued by what Freddie tells her and agrees to work with him – for now.

Tilda thinks the trolls are organised and have links to hate groups. A charismatic local politician is determined to take them on. Some question his motives but Tilda trusts him, maybe too much.

Freddie believes the answer to Vikki’s death lies on the estate where she lived, if he could only get someone to speak out. He wants to know who was bringing drugs into Vikki’s home. He chases old contacts while struggling with his new life.

Beyond the virtual hate and her neighbours’ silence, someone knows who killed Vikki. Tilda and Freddie are determined to find the truth and tell her story.

Still You Sleep is out now and available here!

  About the Author

Kate Vane worked for a number of years as a probation officer. She started writing crime fiction because she thought made-up criminals would be easier to manage (she was wrong). Still You Sleep is her fifth novel.

She has always loved the sea, and now lives on the south Devon coast. If she’s not reading or writing, she’s probably in the garden.

Contact Kate

Website: katevane.com

Twitter: @k8vane

Facebook /k8vane

How Time on Social Media Inspired Kate Vane to Write Her New Novel Still You Sleep! @k8vane Today I'm delighted to welcome author Kate Vane back to my blog. Kate has written a fab post all about how spending too much time on social media inspired her new novel, Still You Sleep!

[wispyrainbow]

Kris Soyer Reference Sheet

-Basics-

Name(Nickname): Kristina ‘Kris’ Aimee Soyer(Krissy)

Age: 26

Gender: Female

Race: French-Hawaiian

VIT(Very Important Things): Is In a Roller Derby team with Philomena, Participated in a Karate Match and Got 2nd Place, Can get drunk off a certain amount of milkshakes, Can’t get drunk off any alcoholic beverages, Sucks at Cooking Souffles(seriously, she almost burned down the kitchen once)

DOB: 8/23/1992

-Physical Details-

Build/Body Type/Physical Frame: Chubby/Endomorph with a 42G-Cup Size

Height: 5’3”

Weight: 170

Skin: Warm Brown

Hair: Burnt Orange Big Curly Natural Fro Put Up Into a Ponytail That Bunches Around Her Shoulders(Usually Expresses To Match Her Emotions)

Eyes: Baby Blue

Other defining features/extra anatomy: Cat-like Fangs, Permanent Blush Lines, A Round Face, A Button Nose, Plump Lips, A Heart-shaped Beauty Mark on her Left Arm and A Deep Lacerations on Her Right Arm(Covered by Bandage)

Habits: Smiles, Wakes up Early, Motivates Herself, Nail biter, Cracks her knuckles, Hums to herself, Yoga, Takes Pictures with Polaroid, Says Yes to Everything, Ballet, Loses her temper, Bites Lips, Curls hair with Fingers, Takes Notes

Gestures/Mannerisms: Head Tilt, Open Hands, Makes hands-to-face gestures, Bites Fingernails, Swaying, Tugs ears, Rubs hand through Hair, Short Breaths, Plays with either a pen or marker, Hands behind back

Demeanor/Carriage/Gait: Compassionate, Honest, Optimism, Loving, Hard-working, Polite, High-spirited, Cautious, Fickle, Feminine, Walks Fairly on Legs, Ordinary Gait

Voice: Motherly-like, Nearly professional but silly, Speaks with a near topical tone Says slang like 'Couch Potato' and 'Crash'

Style: Normal

Clothing: A Pale Pink Bandana Headband

A Black Choker with A Gold Bell Attached

A Red and Black Off Both Shoulders Hooded(Black Hood with A Cat Face and Ears) Exotic Ribbon Smock Top with A Black Cat Tail Attached and Matching Detachable Short Sleeves

A Black Thickstrap Underneath

Pairs of Transparent, Paracord, and Rubber Bracelets on Both her Wrists

Short Black Fingerless Cat Paw Gloves

A Pair of Cuffed Denim Blue Booty Shorts

Black Distressed Ripped Leggings Underneath

Pink Colored Long Legwarmers that Cover Half of her Lower Legs and Sneakers

Pale Yellow with a White Tongue And Black Loosely Tied Sneakers with Small Cat Pawprints At the Bottom of Her Sneakers

-Personality-

Part One: Basic Info

Loves/Favorites: Her cat Orville(A Fluffy Bi-Color which Has a Light Blue Collar with A Bell Attached Around it’s Neck), Winter, Her friends and family, Heavy Metal and Rock, Baseball, Nature + Camping, Romantic Comedies, Karate, Dancing, Her Camper Van ‘Mighty Flower Power’, 60s clothing, Flower Crowns, Pop Music, Animals, Wrestling and Boxing, Fish, Omurice, Traveling, Polaroid Cameras and Pictures, Beaches, Parties, Sweets, Solar Eclipses, The Ocean, Honey, Legwarmers, Sweet Cinnamon Milk Tea, Swedish Fish, Sleepovers, Games, Romance Books, Mythology Books, Giving Hugs, Being Happy, Spam Musubi, Malasadas, Poi, BDSM Methods and Magazines(Though she refuses to reveal this to her friends and family)

Hates: Rivalries, Despair, Cockroaches(she will go through hell and back to get rid of it, or try and hide from any roaches), Giving up, Jellyfishes, Bullying, Crying, The 3 A’s, Being Late, People who never take responsibilities for their actions, Snobs, Nuts, Being anxious/depressed, Feeling dissatisfaction/disappointment, Feeling unpleasant, Her temper, Her Claustrophobia, Laziness, Pineapples, Two-timers, Being told to calm down, Germs, Horror movies, The heat, Hypocrites

Hobbies: Yoga, Dance, Carving, Baking, Baseball, Origami, Camping, Bicycle riding, Poetry, Knitting, Photography, Karate, Roller Derby

Talents/Skills: Basic First Aid, Sewing, Aerobics, Gains the trust of others, Gardening, Hospitality, Lip reading

Hopes/Dreams: To Find Some Place in Her Heart and Mind to Forgive Her Dad, To Find a More Stable Place to Work than Where's She At and to Move past some less than stellar moments

Fears/Nightmares: Her dad, Losing her friends and family, More acts of emotional and physical abuse being inflicted on the ones she loves and herself, A Cramp, Small Space being A means of her Death

Best Quality: Her kindness

Greatest Flaw: Her own Fierce Temper

Character Strengths: Her Optimism, Her Kidness, Supportive, Patient, Her Vitality, Technical Pacifism, Humility, Mercy/Forgiveness

And the coinciding weaknesses: Naive, Non-violent, Pacifist, Soft-hearted, Quick-tempered, Absent-minded, Disturbed, Cannot Keep a Secret, Guilt Complex, Guilty Pleasure

Quirks: Sneezes when nervous/anxious, Hears voices/sounds at times, Terrible Liar, Feels like she’s too needy, Claustrophobic, Does everything twice, Always trying to be positive, Do-gooder, Photographer

One thing she is and one thing she is not: Sweet but not exactly innocent/pure

What she wants (ex: move towards) and doesn’t want (ex: move away from, avoid): Just wants everyone and herself to be happy but wants to avoid confrontation

Part Two: In-depth Analysis

How does the character picture herself: A needy, pathetic optimist who wants to pretend I’m someone I believe I can never be whose temper is uncontrolled which can and will hurt someone I love

How do others see her: A nice girl who cares about others but whose temper needs to be grounded and kept under

Five adjectives that she would use to describe herself: Motivated, Responsible, Finicky, Overemotional, Soft

Five adjectives that others would use to describe her: Upbeat, Committed, Goody two shoes, Wet Blanket, Unchanging

Most Value Possession: Her Headband Bandanna Scarf she received from Dylan when they were kids

Darkest Secret/Treasured Memory: Her father emotionally and mentally abused her as a child and up to her teen years(Secret) and Befriending her friends and being part of a group(Treasured Memory)

Proud Accomplishment/Greatest Failure: Graduating Medical School To Become a Full-Time Nurse(Accomplishment) and Accidentally allowing her dad to injure Parker during one of his abusive states(Failure)

Is she motivated by possibility or necessity: She is a mixed case, seeing it as possible to complete stuff with clean motivation while also believing it to be a necessity in order to thrive on, though only if its something legal and healthy

Current Motivation: Just a need to get by and move on

How does she view the future and/or the past: She view the future as an improvement over everything else and the past as just plain disgusting

What is her philosophy on life and death: Life is something you shouldn't waste by believing that nothing matters and that death, while scary, is something to allow as a sorta of closure

What kind of energy level do they usually have: A inclination of positivism and optimism

How does she show and/or handle: love, affection, grief, pain, anger, sadness, conflict, change, loss: A stammering mess(love), Affectionate and total sweetheart(affection), Goes through a BSOD before fulling letting it out(grief), Shock, confusion and generally broken(pain), A destructive and furious wave that refuses to calm down(anger), Mourning and just a general mess(sadness), Generally trying to avoid any sort(conflict), Accepting despite it all(change), Monotonic and silent with chances of mumbling to herself(loss)

Does she have a temper: Oh YES

How does she respond to the surrounding world, the ‘unfamiliar,’ and other people in general: Generally ok(the surrounding world), Tries to approach in order to get a better understanding(the 'unfamiliar'), Friendly around others but isn't afraid to generally snap if they get on her bad side(people in general)

Polite or rude: Polite all around except if annoyed

Stingy or generous: Generous

What kind of ‘public’ face does she display: A sweet and optimistic outlook

Leader or a follower: A general mix of both

More happy by themselves or in a group: Happy in a group

Does she have any addictions/dependencies/fixations/fetishes/ or other strange behavior: Chewing Coffee Beans, BDSM and Aftercare, Spanking, Yaoi books, Shibari and Safeword

What is her sexual preference/experience/values: Doesn't mind any biological sex, gender or gender identity, Is ok with anything to satisfy her partner, Just wants to make whoever she's with happy

-History/Background-

Setting: Modern living with her friends(Dylan, Terry, and Philomena) in a town called NewDugWood

Occupation: Works 9-5 (sometimes works the night shift) as a nurse at the Peniko Hospital in the busy city parts of NewDugWood

Educational background/other learning experiences: All Years of Pre-K, Elementary, Middle and High School and 4 years of Medical School

Intelligence Level: College Level

Short Term Goals: To make as many friends as possible and to enjoy her life in general

Long Term Goals: To forgive her dad(though that proves impossible at the moment) and to find some form of happiness

Family: Kalia Alana-Soyer-Mother(her inspiration and basic muse), Ace Soyer-Father(angry at him for past abuse, is trying to forgive but can't), Noelani Alana-Kuku Wahine/Grandmother(Loves Spending time with, learned a lot from), Akamu Alana-Tutu Kane/Grandfather+(Misses Greatly, Another Muse for her as well and loved spending time with), Aison Callas-Soyer-Stepfather(loves him, looks up more to him than Ace), Parker Soyer-Younger Brother(Tolerates but loves regardless), Winry Callas-Soyer-Stepsister(Loves and cares about, basically admirer for her)-regardless of her father, they do love each other and are trying to find someway to forgive Ace

Friends: Dylan Akiyama-Childhood Friend(generally cares about him, worries about his health), Terry Mayfair-Childhood Friend(a bit awkward around him but is friendly nonetheless), Philomena Weber-Childhood Friend/Sister from another Mother(hangs out with and generally jokes with), Haruka Wilson-Young Girl Currently Being Taken Care of By Ms. Penny (Loves her and plays pretend with her at any moment), Shawny-Friend(respects but warns him against hurting Dylan), Montague+(trusted more than anyone knew, mourns him still), Bonnie Turner-Best Friend(Known since medical school, a tight trust with her), Iris-Android(tries to teach forms of humanity to,loves)

-Combat-

Physical Strength: Advanced strength and Acrofatic

Coordination/Reflexes: Lands on her Feet Quite Well(similar to a cat)

Fighting Style: Karate/Some Forms of Yoga

Unusual Abilities/Powers: About 6-7 on her abilities and a Bakeneko(other stories)

Weapons/Other Gear: Pair of Duel Clawed Arm Gauntlets/Arm Cannons

[clubofinfo]

Expert: Stealing Life with the Big Bad Retail King — One-third of All Buying Transactions  Good name in man and woman, dear my lord, Is the immediate jewel of their souls. Who steals my purse steals trash; ’tis something, nothing; ‘Twas mine, ’tis his, and has been slave to thousands; But he that filches from me my good name Robs me of that which not enriches him, And makes me poor indeed. — Iago, Shakespeare’s Othello It’s more than disconcerting to hear the blathering now, September 2018, about Jeff Bezos. About Amazon dot com as richest company ever. To hear the fawning love of the rich guy, now, when we were predicting a slave master killing publishing, killing independence; news reports and tribute after tribute for this full-fledged Midas of tax cheating, our homegrown monopolist of the highest order, anti-American who gives a shit about main street America, a misanthropic fake news purveyor, a full-bore felonious PT Barnum and smoke and mirrors double shuffle guy who thinks of his tens upon tens of thousands of warehouse workers as spindles, interchangeable parts, and to hell with their precarity, their one nose-bleed from homelessness. This is a time of same sides of the coin of the realm: the conservative and the liberal, the War-Mongering Democratic Party drooling at the McCain fiasco and the Sycophantic Zio-Christo Republicans confused about who is going to own what while scampering away like rats into the alleys as the headlights of their narcissist-in-chief blowtorches the world. The most important characteristics of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are grandiosity, seeking excessive admiration, and a lack of empathy. These identifying features can result in a negative impact on an individual’s interpersonal affairs and life general. In most cases, on the exterior, these patients act with an air of right and control, dismissing others, and frequently showcasing condescending or denigrating attitudes. Nevertheless, internally, these patients battle with strong feelings of low self esteem issues and inadequacy. Even though the typical NPD patient may achieve great achievements, ultimately their functioning in society can be affected as these characteristics interfere with both personal and professional relationships. A large part of this is as result of the NPD patient being incapable of receiving disapproval or rebuff of any kind, in addition to the fact that the NPD patient typically exhibits lack of empathy and overall disrespect for others.** ** Note that NPD runs through the DNA of these ministers like Jimmy Swaggart or Billy-Franklin Graham, through the family RNA of so-called royalty of the world, in the brain chemistry of the likes of a Henry Kissinger or Adolph Hitler, in the hypothalamus of fruit-salad bedecked generals and in the frontal cortex of all great and not-so-great thespians, from politicos to actors. Moreover, this Bezos, our great Albuquerque-born plumbing showroom huckster peddling absolutely all the stuff we do not need piled up in his fulfillment centers, represents those two sides of the same coin: powerful, libertarian, ruthless and spirit-less, driven to conquer/distribute/hawk all the stuff in any sort of catalog that exists out there to fulfill the needs and mostly not so necessary junk of obsolescence and consumer addiction. A cold anti-philanthropy multi-billionaire, whose net worth of $160.7 billion is headline news now as the TV clowns present the Top Five, Top Ten/Twenty diligently, Bezos is the top of the dung heap according to another rag with all the news unfit (for humanity) to print . . . . . . Who is the richest person in the world? While Forbes updates their list of the world’s billionaires in real time as markets fluctuate, the magazine also releases a more static list each year. The total net worth of these money-makers when the 2018 list was released in March was $7.67 trillion. Click through to see 2018’s top 20 richest billionaires on the planet. With his company — which epitomizes the heights of death star techie logic, next gen robotics, drones, massive crisscrossing of products through a digital satellite-fed network of Prime Time orders — Bezos has continually kicked out with the help of Seattle PD we protesters with one share of his shit stock at shareholder meetings protesting his sadism around refusing to air condition fulfillment centers while instead putting rent-an-ambulances outside the doors! Oh, this economic disruptor of small and large businesses, all part of that gift of unfettered homicidal capitalism a la retail conglomeration, is reviled, hated, but will be the big section in those econ books from many years to come. Bernie Sanders wants a special tax on this white shark-eyed Jeff Bezos? Funny follies of the political kind. Imagine, justifying all the tax evasion and felonies of the billionaires and millionaires and banks and hedge funders and the rest of the elites — that’s the cool truth of our state of misrepresentation in Washington. Never political cries of “tax them all for their externalities — all the damage capital and capitalists have done to the world.”  Major and minor municipalities and entire states fall over themselves with money dripping tongues out of their mouths while courting this company with so many freebies in the billions to get another load of office buildings or fulfillment centers or even another headquarters/campus or pod of fulfillment centers. At any cost. Walmartization of the world, or was it McDonaldization first, or Fordization, but now Amazonization of the culture outstrips anything up to this point in this country’s lunacy. You can get anything anytime anywhere for anyone from this five and dime on steroids. Or, The Details About the CIA’s Deal With Amazon: A $600 million computing cloud built by an outside company is a “radical departure” for the risk-averse intelligence community Just in Time Employment, 11th Hour appointments, Permanent Temp, a Precarity defined as the New Almost Slavery Gig gigs — Coulda Been HuffPost Slave Yet, on Democracy Now, again, in September 2018, we are led to believe we now have to be aghast about those fulfillment centers and those Americans being worked to the bone, worked down to the shredded screws in their hip replacement hardware, worked to confusion and exhaustion and then discarded for not working hard enough for this Master Blaster of the Retail Monopoly. Juan Gonzalez of DN tells us about these “cutting edge” stories from his Rutgers University Department of Journalism and Media Studies students working on this “breaking news,” while Juan laughs and smirks at the reality of “us” (not me) ordering everything on Amazon. Here, the DN reports: As Amazon Hits $1 Trillion in Value, Its Warehouse Workers Denounce “Slavery” Conditions Exposed: Undercover Reporter at Amazon Warehouse Found Abusive Conditions & No Bathroom Breaks Ahh, but we over at DV have been printing these stories for more than six years: * Punditry of Shit-Hole Thinking  * On-line Dildo Salesman Bezos is the News Fit to Print * Amazon.com Don’t Need No Stinking Climate Change Badge, No Stinking Corporate Transparency Crap * Books, Bountiful Ethics, Brave Buyers Nichole Gracely / May 21st, 2012 Pennsylvania’s Lehigh Valley (LV) is a distribution hub, and many fellow Amazon associates and Integrity Staffing Solutions temps had previously worked in other local warehouses. I have and I can say that they’re typically rough workplaces. At first glance, Amazon’s LV fulfillment center appears benign. Primary red, yellow, green and blue splashes of color brighten the place, and motivational posters and friendly educational signs that feature cute characters provide guidance. Hundreds, sometimes thousands of workers populate the warehouse at once, diligently taking direction from hand-held scanners or computers, and the place is enormous so it doesn’t appear cramped. Seriously, the place could house a small city. Physical strength is not a necessary qualification to perform any of their warehouse job functions, and management is ostensibly concerned with worker safety. Just about anyone could staff Amazon’s FC, especially since it only takes a couple of hours to train workers to perform any specific job function. It’s safe to say that anyone laboring in an Amazon FC has fallen into hard times, and many of my former coworkers’ resumes featured distinguished past titles, impressive demonstrations of manual skill and ability, and/or lofty educational attainment. Many never thought they’d wind up in a warehouse and so, yes, this was all foreign for many. Other workers who staffed other warehouses in the past didn’t know what to make of the place because there is something different about Amazon, something alien. “Chairman” Bezos once said that Amazon workers don’t need a union because we own the company. “Chairman” Bezos has zero tolerance for union activity and several Amazon unionization attempts were summarily squashed. After two years on the job an Amazon FC associate is entitled to eight shares of stock. If Amazon is trading at, say, $250 a share, that’s $2,000. Ownership? $250 per share is a generous projection. Seasoned investors are baffled by AMZN’s current overvaluation because of its unhealthy 188:1 (fluctuates, yet always unhealthy) price to earnings ratio, and they’re waiting for the bubble to burst. Nichole went on to write a piece in the Guardian: Amazon Seasonal Work  And the Guardian published another one, more than four years ago: Being homeless is better than working for Amazon Bread and Roses — 106 Years Ago, Back to Now: Strike Amazon, Strike US Correctional Institutions, Boycott I got this from a friend, Andy Piascik, a long-time activist and award-winning author whose most recent book is the novel In Motion. He can be reached at ###. In the end, in the face of the state militia, U.S. Marines, Pinkerton infiltrators and hundreds of local police, the strikers prevailed. They achieved a settlement close to their original demands, including significant pay raises and time-and-a-quarter for overtime, which previously had been paid at the straight hourly rate. Workers in Lowell and New Bedford struck successfully a short while later, and mill owners throughout New England soon granted significant pay raises rather than risk repeats of Lawrence. When the trials of Ettor, Giovannitti and a third defendant commenced in the fall, workers in Lawrence’s mills pulled a work stoppage to show that a miscarriage of justice would not be tolerated. The three were subsequently acquitted. More than a century ago and it’s rabbit-holed history . . . and what do we fight for in this country now? We have fear of unions, we embrace the gig economy/outsourcing on Kratom (called near slavery by socio-economists), and the unimaginable bullshit and shit jobs have generated aimlessness, screen addiction, be mean to thy neighbor mentality, cold hearts and Homo Retailipithecus. Bullshit jobs, as Graeber states: A world without teachers or dock-workers would soon be in trouble. But it’s not entirely clear how humanity would suffer were all private equity CEOs, lobbyists, PR researchers, actuaries, telemarketers, bailiffs or legal consultants to similarly vanish. Shit jobs tend to be blue collar and pay by the hour, whereas bullshit jobs tend to be white collar and salaried. We have become a civilization based on work—not even “productive work” but work as an end and meaning in itself. What is Labor Day or May Day now in a world of Marvel comics and infantilization of every intercourse we have with every sort of humanity? Do we care about solidarity? Do we know how to build communities? Do we see neighbors and people in and on the streets as equals, people, us? What is the value of work when it is drudgery, dog-eat-dog, king of the hill and top of the dung heap relationships? We have to go beyond now this simpleton way of seeing the world from the bifurcated Groucho Marx eyeglasses. This is a great time of upheaval, splintering, hot house planet, Sixth Mass Extinction, a world of capital making more capital off of war, resource theft, thievery of other nations’ and cultures’ futures. Jobs, Who Doesn’t Choose to Collapse, Hothouse Planet, People As I continually teach young people to think, you are what you eat, what you do, what you think, what your read, what you say, what you believe, what you aspire to, what you hope for, what you do or not do to be one with humanity. If your life is one of toil, what is inside the heart, and what do you do with those beliefs and philosophies while slogging away? Are you a believer in exceptionalism, Zionist or Christian superiority? Is the white shade of skin the defining element in your life? Do you have passions that are your own, or are they manufactured, designed, and cajoled by the money changers and propagandists?  The worker must have bread, but she must have roses, too. This line was from a speech by Rose Schneiderman, Polish-born socialist and feminist and prominent labor union leaders in America. It’s a phrase embodying everything today we workers need to utilize as a galvanizing force upon our souls to break away from these people like Bezos and the entire master crafters of our pain, poverty and penury. When I say “our,” I mean the world’s collective pain in the form of billions of people, for whom Western Culture (sic) has set loose a wildfire of forced displacement, murder, resource extraction, war and disease of the mind and body. It was also a successful textile strike in Lawrence, Massachusetts, during January–March 1912, which is pretty much universally referred to as the “Bread and Roses” strike. Pairing bread and roses not as counter-balances — fair wages and dignified conditions. Defining “the sometimes tedious struggles for marginal economic advances in the light of labor struggles as based on striving for dignity and respect,” as Robert J. S. Ross wrote in 2013. I imagine the Bezos types wanting every last penny from every last $2-a-day inhabitant on earth, and I imagine this fellow is as steely-hearted as any in an Upton Sinclair book — and note this first quote by Sinclair is for me about men and women working today, even though Sinclair was writing about a living livestock animal torn from life: One could not stand and watch very long without being philosophical, without beginning to deal in symbols and similes, and to hear the hog-squeal of the universe…. Each of them had an individuality of his own, a will of his own, a hope and a heart’s desire; each was full of self-confidence, of self-importance, and a sense of dignity. And trusting and strong in faith he had gone about his business, the while a black shadow hung over him, and a horrid Fate in his pathway. Now suddenly it had swooped upon him, and had seized him by the leg. Relentless, remorseless, all his protests, his screams were nothing to it. It did its cruel will with him, as if his wishes, his feelings, had simply no existence at all; it cut his throat and watched him gasp out his life. ― Upton Sinclair, The Jungle It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it. ― Upton Sinclair, I, Candidate for Governor: And How I Got Licked Delusions  of Terra-Forming and Mickey Mouse Grabbing Adults’ Attention So what do we do with these Titans of idiocy, with their billions and their algorithms, with their broken telescopes peering into the black hole of humanity? What about the 150,000 chemicals in human cells created by the industrialists, those synergistic variant effects we have zero knowledge about, which have helped push our American society into a chronically ill species of over 50 percent of a population cycled through Western (Un-)Medicine. Children with autism or on the spectrum — count that as possibly 30 percent of all births by 2040. Diabetes 1 and 2, more than 15 percent or more of the population by 2040. According to Dr. Winchester: This is a really important concept that is difficult to teach the public, and when I say the public, I include my clinical colleagues. Still, atrazine is not the only human hormone-altering chemical in the environment. Dr. Winchester tested nearly 20 different chemicals and all demonstrated epigenetic effects, for example, all of the chemicals reduced fertility, even in the 3rd generation. Still, why do 150,000,000 Americans have chronic diseases? Researchers believe that every adult disease extant is linked to epigenetic origins. If confirmed over time with additional research, the study is a blockbuster that goes to the heart of public health and attendant government regulations. According to Dr. Winchester: This is a huge thing that is going to change how we understand the origin of disease. But a big part of that is that it will change our interpretation of what chemicals are safe. In medicine I can’t give a drug to somebody unless it has gone through a huge amount of testing. But all these chemicals haven’t gone through anything like that. We’ve been experimented on for the last 70 years, and there’s not one study on multi-generational effects. Environmental Working Group tested more than a dozen brands of oat-based foods to give Americans information about dietary exposures that government regulators are keeping secret. In April, internal emails obtained by the nonprofit US Right to Know revealed that the Food and Drug Administration has been testing food for glyphosate for two years and has found “a fair amount,” but the FDA has not released the findings. Ahh, the melting planet, the water cycle’s disrupted, the entire mess of planetary re-shifting is on a collision course with Homo Sapiens. Everyday I get more and more notifications from friends and thinkers about the impending collapses, the impending peak this and peak that (Peak Everything). Globalization makes it impossible for modern societies to collapse in isolation, as did Easter Island and the Greenland Norse in the past. Any society in turmoil today, no matter how remote … can cause trouble for prosperous societies on other continents and is also subject to their influence (whether helpful or destabilizing). For the first time in history, we face the risk of a global decline. But we also are the first to enjoy the opportunity of learning quickly from developments in societies anywhere else in the world today, and from what has unfolded in societies at any time in the past. That’s why I wrote this book.” ― Jared Diamond, Collapse: How Societies Choose to Fail or Succeed Feudal Factories of Propaganda and Propagating .001 Percenters — Water, Man, Water We trust ourselves, far more than our ancestors did… The root of our predicament lies in the simple fact that, though we remain a flawed and unstable species, plagued now as in the past by a thousand weaknesses, we have insisted on both unlimited freedom and unlimited power. It would now seem clear that, if we want to stop the devastation of the earth, the growing threats to our food, water, air, and fellow creatures, we must find some way to limit both. ― Donald Worster, Under Western Skies: Nature and History in the American West We are seeing this circling of the billionaires’ wagons (vultures circling the 7.8 billion marks, us), this Bezos and Musk lust for space, for some planetary gated-armed-Utopian community. These fellows and dames are something else, and the conjurers of news unfit to consume fall over them, recording and publishing story after story about their wisdom and foresight and shamanistic ways of predicting the future. Remember George W. Bush and his big ranch buy in Paraguay? That was 12 years ago, readers, yet, back to the future, with news (sic) report after news report (sic) keeps tracking the next billionaire economic ejaculation. W, and we thought he was only painting pets! The Chaco is a semiarid, sparsely populated area known — to the extent that it’s known at all — for its abundant wildlife, rapid deforestation, nothing in particular… and what lies beneath it… Our Real Wealth Trader and Outstanding Investments contributor Jody Chudley thinks he knows the true gen about the Bush land grab. Jody says he has a “secret” about the Bushes. And he adds, “It has to do with an investment idea that’s hardly on anyone’s radar.” The real reason Jody thinks Bush 43 and family snapped up nearly 300,000 acres in those semiarid, sparsely populated wastes of Paraguay? Water. That’s right, blue gold. Bush bought the rights to a veritable ocean of fresh, clear-as-glass, Grade A water. His land rests atop one of the largest freshwater aquifers in the world: Acuifero Guarani, by name. According to Jody, “Acuifero Guarani covers roughly 460,000 square miles under parts of Brazil, Paraguay, Uruguay and Argentina. It is estimated to contain about 8,900 cubic miles of water.” If you can’t quite imagine 8,900 miles of water, picture a pool nearly three times the size of California. That should give you a decent idea. A fair amount when you consider that 98% of this planet’s water is salt water. Of the other 2%, almost 87% of it is trapped within glaciers, hence inaccessible. Jody’s “trusty calculator” informs him that only 0.25% of the water on this cosmic ball is fresh (underground, or in rivers and lakes). Just a drop in the figurative bucket… Now, we knew this sort of stuff was going on with the elites, who look at us all as easy marks, broken money bags, the fat cows or broken pigs of their global stockades. What’s happened is this trickle-down lust-love-longing for these people who get plastered in the headlines as being grand and philanthropists, deserving of every cent and every billion made on the back of people, earth, cultures. Their trans-capital and monopolies  and viral presence like Google, Facebook, Walmart, and on and on sucks the revolution out of revolutionary, since we are now shackled to their ways of doing things. The goal of the capitalists is to harmonize their theft with our survival, whatever it takes to put five to a studio apartment (of course, sneaking the other four into the room in the dead of night), whatever it takes to just float through a gridlocked urban and suburban world. So, from Bush and Paraguay, to this Gawker Killer Thiel, we have enough evidence of their feudal ways, their slippery snake eyes methods of shitting on we underlings: Here is Robert Hunziker: Peter Thiel, the PayPal billionaire and renowned super-super-super libertarian and unapologetic Trumpster love-fester achieved New Zealand citizenship in only 12 days and bought not only his citizenship but a $13.8 M estate in Wanaka, a lakeside community. According to a phone interview with the former PM of New Zealand John Key, “If you’re the sort of person that says I’m going to have an alternative plan when Armageddon strikes, then you would pick the farthest location and the safest environment – and that equals New Zealand if you Google it… It’s known as the last bus stop on the planet before you hit Antarctica. I’ve had a lot of people say to me that they would like to own a property in New Zealand if the world goes to hell in a hand-basket. Hell in a hand-basket, from the former prime minister of New Zealand — 1935 Book, quote: If the average white New Zealander takes the Maori seriously as a human being, he is usually rather too ready to blame him for characteristics which more careful study will show not to be inherent at all but actually the result of the coming of the Europeans themselves, the extensive destruction of Maori life and the virtual dispossession of the Maori people. Little attempt is commonly made to understand the causes which produced, for a time at any rate (for they are passing) those Maori characteristics which have become almost proverbial amongst us. To put it frankly, we blame the Maori for becoming what we have made him. It is interesting to realise that similar circumstances of the contact of peoples have occurred before, and in view of the people referred to there is one instance which it seems particularly fitting that we should bear in mind. The instance comes down to us from the days when another great Empire, an ancient one, was civilizing native peoples. There is on record a letter from a wealthy Roman landowner to his agent in Britain telling him to ship no more British slaves “as they are so lazy and cannot be trusted to work.” Similar causes produce similar effects; we should be less ready with hasty judgment and hasty blame. There is a widespread belief, and it is one certainly cherished by the average white New Zealander, that no native people have ever been so fairly treated by Europeans as have the Maori people. As a matter of fact, if it is fully and frankly told, the story of the contact of Europeans with native peoples is much the same everywhere. What we have are so many varieties of what a leading anthropologist has recently termed “the tragic mess which invariably results from the impact of white upon aboriginal culture.” It is true that the Maori people have survived, but this, on careful analysis, proves to be very largely due to their own qualities and their own efforts rather than to any specially favourable mode of treatment. If we are honest there is little ground for pakeha self-congratulation. Ahh, the evidence of climate change (global warming–hot planet) was there in 1896 researched, formulated and discoursed by Swedish scientist Svante Arrhenius (and then later, amateur G. S. Callendar ramified the greenhouse effect of burning fossil fuels, and then later, C. D. Keeling measured the rising CO2 levels tying that to the greenhouse hot house effect), but for which has been swept into confusion by those marketers and mad men. Imagine, average planetary temps going up from  2.5–11°F by 2100. Imagine that! The more civilizations evolve, the more energy dependent they become, so it’s possible that trillions of civilizations in the great continuum of space evolved, rose, fell and disappeared. If you develop an industrial civilization like ours, the route is going to be the same. You’re going to have a hard time not triggering climate change. For a civilization to destroy itself through nuclear war, it has to have certain emotional characteristics. You can imagine certain civilizations saying, ‘I’m not building those [nuclear weapons]. Those are crazy.’ But climate change, you can’t get away from. If you build a civilization, you’re using huge amounts of energy. The energy feeds back on the planet, and you’re going to push yourself into a kind of Anthropocene. It’s probably universal. —  Adam Frank, astrophysicist Interlude, Interglacial Periods, Working for the Homeless — Flailing at Windmills   Yeah, these big ideas I broach with homeless veterans and their attendant family members, and while the Gates-Kochs-Zuckerbergs-Bloombergs-Adelsons-et al have zero concern about us, the proles, the  detritus of their Capital, I believe working to change one life at a time — even if it’s a life riddled with evictions, felonies, relapses, epigenetic familial hell, PTSD, trauma, spiritlessness, physical decay — has meaning since in that process I have incredible interchanges with people who sort of want the same thing — paradigm shifts and de-industrialization and ecosocialism a la Marx 3.0. I try to find peace in writing, even these polemics at DV or LA Progressive; and in my own world of fiction-poetry-creative nonfiction, the windmills abound because of a rarefied culture of the M-F-A (masters in fine arts) elite — those gatekeepers of the small literary kind, or even the National Book Award kind. This country is not big on real outliers in anything tied to the arts, and I am one of those round pegs looking to splinter the quintessential square hole. Short story collection? Who the hell would read that? Well, try out a project of mine to get the stories —  thematically (sort of) threaded (sort of) to the “Vietnam experience” — as a hard copy from a small press, Cirque. You can read one of the stories, “Bloody Sheets,” here, starting on page 115. The collection, Wide Open Eyes: Surfacing from Vietnam, is a gathering of fiction, much of which has been published in literary journals. I have succumbed to a Go Fund Me “deal” to help balance-offset the costs of printing a book on paper with ink. I have no idea if a Go Fund Me will even take off. The first and only donation is from filmmaker Brian Lindstrom. Amazing, a struggling documentarian throwing in FIRST. But we are in a new normal of shitting on writers, expecting us to have our day and then our night jobs and then write-write-write for free. That is the question, really, who wants to spend their time reading short stories, outside the very narrow readership of Masters of Fine Arts aficionados who in many regards can be pedantic and puffery artists? Vietnam, no less, in a time of Tim Burns rotting the foundation of the war we committed, or the Obama administration’s scrubbing of the war in his effort to commemorate it (Obama gives killer Kissinger awards). Vietnam. One of my short journalist pieces for an old weekly I worked for in Spokane. How many died in Vietnam and Indochina? 3.8 million? Oh, that Nobel Cause (War) myth I run into daily at a homeless veterans shelter, that is was winnable and worthy. Killing farmers, man, in their rice paddies! Whew, only a Zionist could write that script. Read my short story collection for a different way to frame creativity and that time period, that narrative framing, that time in history that has defined and redefined the ugly wars of today. I am going to give this a shot in a time of blatant skepticism and group-think/act/do. Wide Open Eyes: Surfacing from Vietnam. Be part of the creative impetus. The energy. The publication of a short story collection. With that “ask” of the reader who then gives will receive another book of mine, Reimagining Sanity: Voices Beyond the Echo Chamber. In my view [Dan Kovalik], this Noble Cause myth may be the most powerful and enduring propaganda trick ever perpetrated. And, it works so well because the audience for the trick — the U.S. people — are such willing and eager participants in the charade. To explain the power of the Noble Cause myth, Marciano quotes from Harold Pinter’s 2005 Nobel Prize lecture.  I set forth a larger quote from the lecture than appears in the book because it is so profound: The United States supported and in many cases engendered every right wing military dictatorship in the world after the end of the Second World War. I refer to Indonesia, Greece, Uruguay, Brazil, Paraguay, Haiti, Turkey, the Philippines, Guatemala, El Salvador, and, of course, Chile. The horror the United States inflicted upon Chile in 1973 can never be purged and can never be forgiven. Hundreds of thousands of deaths took place throughout these countries. Did they take place? And are they in all cases attributable to US foreign policy? The answer is yes they did take place and they are attributable to American foreign policy. But you wouldn’t know it. It never happened. Nothing ever happened. Even while it was happening it wasn’t happening. It didn’t matter. It was of no interest. The crimes of the United States have been systematic, constant, vicious, remorseless, but very few people have actually talked about them. You have to hand it to America. It has exercised a quite clinical manipulation of power worldwide while masquerading as a force for universal good. It’s a brilliant, even witty, highly successful act of hypnosis. John Steppling, my fellow writer who studies intersections of culture-mimesis-art-politics (My review of his book,  Aesthetic Resistence and Dis-interest. That Which Will Not Allow Itself to be Said, here at DV) discusses the MFA phenomenon, a true watering down and controlled form of check and balances fiction: So, the fact that The Rockefeller Foundation underwrote (and still underwrites) a good many MFA programs (and not just in literature, but in theatre and fine arts) is both relevant, and not. Or maybe a better way to address this is see The Rockefeller Foundation as symptom. I received a Rockefeller fellowship, which I hadn’t applied for. But, the very fact that creative writing programs boomed after WW2, and permeated the academic landscape is without question linked to the patronage of institutions like The Rockefeller Foundation (and the MacArthur Foundation, and…). And to deny that the tacit influence of these institutions is idiotic. Now, it’s also true that what John Crowe Ransom and Stegner and Burrows preached is correct. Or it’s correct up to a point. It is revealing that Melville was derided, because Melville wrote a lot of ideas, and additionally observed the ways those ideas and that knowledge existed in the world. But it is equally true that you do not observe those harpoons so closely, or closely in a particular way, that all you get is a harpoon description. And a so described harpoon that never participates in riots or social unrest, and whose production is unexamined and the harpoon company that distributes it is left blank…the better to describe the fluted morning dew that bifurcates my tabby cat’s shadow on the harpoon handle, and etc etc etc is only a individual’s sensory observation. The harpoon must be known, not just observed. The real point here is that what Iowa started, and many other University programs followed, was to narrow down the definition of “fiction”. Dante would not be considered fiction today. While there is a point in demanding a concrete description, and not a generality, the exclusive focus on the concrete meant that ideas were being eliminated in fiction. The world is not abstract… but that includes History and politics and tensions of daily life. Those offices in New York, or those bad marriages, are not separate from the Chinese Revolution, or U.S. Imperialism, or the blockade of Cuba or the present two million men and women in prison in the United States. ‘Greatness’, whatever that means, and I have no problem with that word, or the ideas behind it, is in discovering both what that connection is, and ..and this is important I believe…how our own personal emotional and psychic formation, and development are related to both Mao and our failed marriages (or, even the successful ones). The emphasis on observation, on brute description, however eclipsed ideas as a subject for fiction. You may not sit down to write ideas, per se, but you certainly have an idea of what a harpoon is. You have to know certain things, and, in fact, the best writing is that which tells you what you don’t know, not describes nicely what you already do know. And there is a tendency in young writers to generalize. So on the one hand it’s natural to emphasize the concrete, but the result, perhaps intentional, or partly so (given the Rockefeller project) was the elimination of ideas in prose, and the narrowing of the definition of what constituted “fiction” http://clubof.info/