#Trans Octavian is in my canon version so I didn’t add it here

[pjo-hoo-toa-freakazoid]

Concept: Bisexual Octavian that deals with internalized homophobia? The last part can be optional

I believe in Bi Tav supremacy…🙏🏼

This is mainly about Tav’s internal Bi-phobia because I’m pretty sure that even if he got some support, he wouldn’t quite still come in terms with his sexuality.

(If we go with canon Octavian)

!!!TW!!!

Not that anybody in Camp Jupiter cares about a person’s orientation. But Octavian makes it a big deal. He basically comes from a conservative family. They’re the kind that’ll pretend to support LGBTQ+ just to gain support but in reality they’re just plain homophobes who want clout. So this is basically the environment Tav grew up in.

So he’s supposed to pretend to care about the community but in his head he thinks it’s weird and unnatural (despite Apollo legit being Bi himself). He really wasn’t good at hiding his disgust tho.

His Bisexual awakening was his mentor (the Augur before him). At first in his head he thought that the feelings he felt towards the Augur was just admiration but it ended up being a small crush. (This was when he was 15)

So he suffered a lot from self loathe cuz all this time of crushing on girls he suddenly likes boys now?? He thought he let his family down just by crushing on another guy. So he basically openly became homophobic thinking it’d get rid of any feelings he’s experiencing. That really made people hate him. And he just created a bigger problem for himself.

In his head he thinks that being gay or Bi makes a person look weak. Like if he likes guys his social status would decrease. This caused a lot of insecurities which would often give him a ton of anxiety.

Rarely he’d think that he’d accept it but then the his family’s thoughts strike him and he’d start the self loathing all over again.

Despite there being a ton of openly gay/bi/lesbian/etc couples in CJ, Octavian kept creating scenarios in his head about how things would eventually turn for the worse if he opened up.

Sometimes it caused mental breakdowns, because he’d overthink too much. He thinks too much about his social rank and his family name.

He accidentally came out to Micheal it a fit of rage while a breakdown during a quest. Which was regarding Octavian’s new crush (one of the quest members) and he proceeded to freak out. Micheal was able to calm him down but then Octavian threatened him not to tell anyone. So Mike remained quiet thinking Tav needed his space.

For sometime after that they had their small talks regarding the topic but Octavian would brush it off and get mad pretty quick. And Mike kept reassuring him that it was fine and that many of the people in Tav’s Cohorts were also Bisexual (himself included) and there was nothing to be ashamed about. Tav didn’t care. It was about him not the others.

He was too stubborn to listen. Despite having a few changes like dropping his homophobia towards others (he got the talk* from Micheal) and being a bit more open minded,. He still didn’t quite want to come in terms with his own sexuality still thinking that people might ridicule him or call him soft or weak.

So like I said above, despite whatever support he got he’d still won’t come in terms with himself. Only if he tried being more confident about this certain topic then there might have been a chance he could’ve accepted it but would like to remain closeted.

Positive note: Doesn’t care if someone is Trans. Often had troubles understanding Genderfluid and non-Binary people but eventually came to terms with the concepts. Gave more respect.

Considering which way he swings more is actually 50/50. But it mainly ends up as a temporary crush since he isn’t too keen on the idea of dating thinking it’ll distract him from his duties.

Sorry about the angst I stayed true to the canon version😭