#Though nothing will ever beat translating the Satiricon

[elwenn-dreaming]

Oh yeah I know the type. Art class was mandatory in middle school, so it was kind of like recess, but with paint and potentially harmful instruments.

I didn't take the optional art class in art school because I wanted to keep learning Latin (that one was full of shenanigans too, albeit of a different kind).

Since @alithographica asked and I love talking about myself, and moderately enjoys occasionally remembering middle school, here is a non exhaustive list of shenanigans that happened in art class in middle school:

There was this one time where we were working in groups and the assignment was "1m³". First of all wtf. Second of all, the only authorized media were gouache a tempera and newspaper. We had to create a art piece taking 1m³ of the classroom (about 35 cube feet I believe). I have never seen so much paint on the floor. We had to paint leaves and leaves of newspaper, and the first 10 were done with large paintbrushes, all neat at the edges. As time went on we'd just spread paper in a large square on the floor and splurt large stains of blue and yellow paint on it, and roll it on like madmen. My group made a waterfall with grass and mossy rocks. The green square was so large and us so little forethinking that to paint the center we decided we'd just have to wait until the edges were dry and that we'd lay on our bellies to reach it. Spoiler alert, it wasn't dry, and a girl spent the whole day with a large green stain on her t-shirt. I managed to get some in my eyebrows (how?)

This one was "camouflage". That's when 3 guys decided to wrap one of them in newspapers, lay him on the floor and cover it with newspapers also. The teacher said he was effectively camouflaged, but that it wasn't very likely to be effective in any other situation than a visit to a publishing place.

My own submission consisted in painting my sister's face with face paint with leaves on a green background, take a photo, cut it out, stick it on a piece of paper and draw leaves on the paper too. She said it wouldn't be very useful except if someone had a leaf-patterned wallpaper at home. Anyways.

Said teacher had a hammer. And a large metal desktop. When the class got too noisy we'd get a warning hit on a wooden table. And then she'd get on to the metal. Extremely effective, extremely deafening, should be forbidden by the Geneva agreements.

Hoy glue guns. Who the fuck thought it was a good idea to let 7th grade students use hot glue guns? A guy got stuck, he couldn't stop the glue flow, panicked, the whole back of the classroom looked like Cirith Ungol and he was in the middle of it like

There are still some left, but it will be for another time!