#This one dude in particular who loves me he was freaking out when I wore a jethro tull shirt last time I'm worried if I cover that song

[mellotronmkll]

I wanna do an acoustic cover of still you turn me on at open mic sometime because I've got that specific version of it down now and it sounds really cool but I'm worried it might just be too much for the old men who are obsessed with me to handle

[andimack-crack]

A christ-mack story: Andi Mack

read part one here

Part 2: Memories and Menorahs

[Word count: 1631]

T.J's POV

I was stressing out ripping through my cupboard I had never been to a Hanukkah celebration before I've only ever been to Cyrus's Bar and his Grandmother's Shiva. Those were easy enough go dress for but I wasn't sure what outfit said 'I'm here for Hanukkah but I'm also here to help your gay son come out to you' luckily I called for some back up.

"I'm here the dating expert is here" Jonah said bursting into my room

"Pipe down Jonah we all know how your relationships ended" Marty said trailing behind.

"Well if I have such bad relationships how come I easily get back into them?" He said smirking

"Guys big picture I need help"

"Okay, okay let me dig into your closet  Marty get the make up kit" Jonah said going inside my mess

"Th-the what?" I said nervously

"Hey Jo do we need the razor for his hair?" Marty said from the hallway

"Um yeah" Jonah said his voice suddenly a little high pitch.

"What no not the hair!" I said frantically they both started laughing coming to stand next to me.

"You big idiot we're joking" Marty said patting my back

"Dude you're over thinking this Cyrus likes you because you're you and it seems cliche but if you be yourself in front of his parents you'll do fine" Jonah said smiling encouragingly

"Thank you Jonah"

"Yeah man your a great person we all know that now the Goodmans have met you before anyways you just need to have confidence Cyrus is probably just as nervous" Marty reassured

"But I can still pick a decent outfit because you know don't wanna look you don't care" Jonah said digging into my closest

******

Bex's POV

I had been avoiding talking about Gabriel changing the subject whenever Bowie tried bringing him up I'm thankful he never spoke about it in front of Andi even though she knew more than he did. I just wasn't ready to re-live those memories again. But Bowie wasn't having any of it he kept pressing on and on now I couldn't avoid it since Andi had gone out with Buffy.

"Bex please just tell me who he is" he pressed

"W-who" I pretended play dumb

"Gabriel"

Whenever I was with Gabriel, my self-esteem always took a hit. He would jokingly criticise what I wore or the way I did my hair and makeup, saying things like, ‘Were you still asleep when you got dressed this morning?’ and ‘Your eye shadow and lipstick colours make you look super-old – maybe you need some makeup lessons’. Looking back now, I can say that his comments were hurtful and unnecessary, but at the time I just passed them off as him trying to be funny. Whenever he made such belittling jokes, I would force a smile but on the inside I’d be crying.

"He's nobody don't worry" I said to Bowie smiling but also freaking out on the inside. How did he even find my number? What could he possibly want to tell me?

"You're sure he's nobody? you seem on edge by the mention of his name" he said putting a hand on my arm

"I'm sure h-he supplied me with new chairs for cloud ten last week"

"Oh well alright then I'm gonna make some lunch hungry?"

"Always" I threw a small smile which felt more like a grimace but I saw his phone number still on there I quickly wrote it down and deleted the message.

Occasionally, however, Gabriel would compliment me or say something supportive – in those moments, I would reassure myself that our relationship was okay and that I ought to stay with him. At the time, I couldn’t see that that was just his way of controlling me and to keep me hooked so that I wouldn’t leave him.

I shuddered thinking of all those memories. I had a lot other important things to think about. Something really big in particular I didn't have a lot of time to worry about Gabriel.

But I should at least hear what he has to say.

Cyrus's POV

"I-I'm gay but this doesn't change a thing I'm still me"

I had given the same speech to myself in front of the mirror for the past half hour I still didn't feel as if I could go out there and do it. I hardly believed in the words I was saying. A tear slid down my cheek I wiped it away I had to compose myself. I read somewhere that it's difficult coming out to the ones you love because you've known them forever you don't want things to change. That's probably why it hurt so much. I washed and dried my face straightening the kippah on my head taking a deep breath. I jumped when there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Cyrus your friend T.J's here" I heard my mom say from the outside

"Okay" I opened the door and went downstairs T.J was talking to my aunt Ruthie

Oh no.

"So T.J are you Jewish?" She had a scary look in her eye

"No I'm just here for Cyrus" he smiled coolly

"Oh are there any girls in school that are interested in him or do you know of any he could go out with?" T.J looked a little confused so I went in to save him

"Hey aunt Ruthie chag sameach" (happy holiday)

"Oh Hanukkah sameach dear" (happy hanukkah)

She left me and T.J alone and no one could see us from the halls so I went in for a quick hug and he smiled kissing my forehead

"Sorry about her she's very well..." I trailed off looking for the right words

"I get it my relatives are like that too" he took my hand making light circles on the back.

"Are you okay?" He asked concerned

"Y-yeah I'm just really nervous since most of my family is here" he squeezed my hand

"You'll be alright I promise" I smiled at him gratefully. We entered the living room my mom putting up a picture of Bubbe Rose I realised it's my first Hanukkah without her.

We all stood around the Menorah as all eight candles were lit as it was the final day my family's rabbi recited a prayer that everybody followed along with T.J attempted but without much success since it was in hebrew but it was sweet he tried. I subtly wrapped a pinky around his we did the same linking them together without drawing too much attention.

"Cyrus" Rabbi Hurwitz suddenly spoke making my pinky move away from T.J's "I'm going to lead a prayer for your Bubbe Rose would you like to join?"

I wanted to but I wasn't sure I'd be able to get through it I've been missing her so much recently.

"N-no thank you sorry" he nodded understanding I wasn't ready he said the prayer I hung my head low fighting the tears in my eyes. Once it was over I was about to go help my mom in the kitchen but T.J quickly put a hand on my shoulder.

"Are you okay underdog?" He said softly I just shrugged

"I will be as soon as this is over with" I said reassuring him.

I brought the food to the table and set it down pointing out to T.J what food is good and what isn't good this year I made sure gefilte fish wasn't on the menu nobody likes it any ways.

"Cyrus um... I was just speaking with Rabbi Hurwitz and I just wanted to let you know that it's okay" my dad reassured

"I don't understand" I said confused

"It's just he said he saw you... hold hands with T.J over here" oh shit.

"What" my mom interrupted coming over "Cyrus honey are you gay?"

"Well I-i" I stuttered

"Gay what is that?" My aunt Ruthie  intruded. That's the last thing I needed

"I can shed some light on this" T.J began with my other family members beginning to listen "Yeah um me and Cyrus we... we are dating"

"Yes T.J is my boyfriend" I said smiling proudly taking his hand "we're both gay... I'm gay" I breathed out

"You... You're both boys" my aunt Ruthie objected

"Yeah good catch but gay means you're a boy that's only romantically attracted to boys that's way I haven't had any girlfriends since Iris I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was scared" T.J squeezed my hand tightly.

"Plus after Bubbe...p-passed away I felt so guilty for not telling her when I knew I could of" my breath got caught in my throat.

"Honey don't worry she knew" my eyes went wide at what my mom said

"How?"

"When me and Norman last spoke to her she told us to never disrespect you just because you're different from us she said we should treat you the same as we always have I didn't understand at the time but now I do"

I was in shock I have no idea how she could of known but at least she did know.

"T.J we are glad it's you Cyrus has found" my dad said putting a hand on T.J's shoulder he smiled thankfully.

"Well I guess I'm happy for you Cyrus he seems like a very nice boy and if Rose was okay with it then so am I" Aunt Ruthie squeezed my face

"Well then all that's left to do is... eat I mean now I feel the need to celebrate" I smiled my family sat down at the table me and T.J had been holding hands the whole time.

And I wasn't planning on ever letting go.

[juchumice]

Green Notebook

‘HOW THE FREAK DO YOU WRITE ROMANTIC STUFF FREAKING FREAKING FREAK SHOW KICKS A CAN DOWN THE ROAD AND IT SPIRALS A MILLION GAJILLION MILES AWAY ARRRRGH!!!’

Shouta frowned at the chicken scratch on the page. 

There was no particular reason Shouta was sitting here with Yamada’s notebook in hand and… ahem, invading privacy. But in his defense, it was a complete accident that he had noticed this little dog-eared green book lying innocently on the floor beneath Yamada’s desk. By now, Shouta should have grown accustomed to knowing what belonged to who, and the lime green of the object that forced Shouta to squint could belong only to one person. So, he was absolutely dumbfounded that he didn’t initially recognize the notebook. 

Everything was scratched with a hurried hand, as if the owner had far too many thoughts in his head and had to force it out onto the page before he promptly exploded-- which Shouta couldn’t help but think was very very possible. Each page was messy. Strange, full of convoluted text that dizzied his tired eyes. 

On one side there were several notes, completely unrelated to the topic of heroes. Some names sprinkled around, some tips on speaking, and apparently a chalked up script in some way, announcing, ‘PRESENT MIC’S PREMIERE!!!’ in blocky bold letters. Who Present Mic was was completely lost on him. 

Then, on the other side, there were several sketches of various designs. Some were long and arching, others were thin and scraggly, but in total they all seemed… very artistically untuned. Yamada must have been bursting with his “DJ energy” (he spoke to Shouta about himself using those exact words-- it was not funny) when he was doing these, and several more pages of more logos of different shapes and sizes revealed exactly how fevered Yamada was. Then, the logos disappeared, replaced by blank paper. 

God, even looking at Yamada’s writing was giving Shouta a headache, and it wasn’t nearly as bad as speaking to the DJ himself. Yet, this erratic nature, both sadistic and tender, Yamada had towards his possession fascinated Shouta to no end. Apparently, there were many gentle words scrawled in it: chalked up messages of encouragement to himself, recollections of memories, a love letter that never got finished. All of these should have been lovingly taken care of and tidied neatly… but the actual state of the notebook refused to reflect any of that. Instead, it looked as if it had been dropped in mud puddles, thrown against walls, bitten by dogs, and left to rot in a dark cabinet for at least a week. Several grease stains dotted the pages, leaving Shouta to chalk up a picture of Yamada writing frantically while shoving noodles down his gullet. Disgusting. Too many pages had folded corners, and the marker used to color or highlight was far too garish and heavy that it bled through everywhere else. 

If anything, it was just mess, mess, and more mess. 

But, Shouta’s own masochist curiosity led him to continue till he was at the apparent page regarding the writing of ‘romance.’ The corner of this particular paper looked to be folded a minimum of six times. As for the contents itself, many words weren’t readable as the chicken scratch just declined to pure obscurity. The red marker that criss crossed like a murder scene across the page wasn’t helping either. 

‘I HATE WRITING!! I HATE WRITING!!!!!!!!! UGHHH!’ read Shouta. His brows pinched in, admittedly warranted confusion. Who knew smiling loud Yamada was so negative at times… or he was being far too dramatic as he usually was. Judging from the sheer amount of everything written in capitalization, Yamada was always dramatic in there. 

Apart from the loud sentences Yamada had sputtering around, there was an actual semblance of organization for several seconds. Here, the writing appeared neater, less tight, as if he finally gave them the rest to breathe. The words were organized into sweet little paragraphs:

‘I KNOW YOU DON’T KNOW ME WELL, AND I DON’T KNOW YOU WELL, BUT, HEY! THAT’S OKAY, BECAUSE WE STILL HAVE CHANCES TO GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER BETTER!’

Sweet jesus, please stop writing like that. 

‘I KNOW THIS SOUNDS REALLY REALLY STUPID, BUT IT’LL BE AWESOME IF WE WERE FRIENDS, YEAH? YOU’RE CHILL AND FUNNY AND…’

Here, it looks like Yamada waited a bit too long. The ink blotted thickly around the ‘D’ of ‘AND’, burning a hole into the page. But, despite the absolute wrecked appearance that this splatter of ink did to the paper, Yamada continued to barrel on. Shouta couldn’t help but be reluctantly concerned for Yamada’s wellbeing at this point. All those chemicals from stained ink couldn’t have done well for his lungs.  

‘WE’VE BEEN SITTING NEXT TO EACH OTHER FOR AWHILE, AND I HAVEN’T SAID ONE THING TO YOU!!! YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT SUCKS?? I MUST BE THE MEANEST PERSON ON THE PLANET RIGHT NOW, AND YOU LOOK REALLY LONELY NEED A FRIEND INDEPENDENT ALL THE TIME, AND IT WOULDN’T HURT TO GET TO KNOW YOU.’

The page crinkled in Shouta’s hands as he reread that particular paragraph once more. Sitting next… was Yamada talking about him? That made particular sense, considering Yamada’s assumption of the mysterious ‘you’ being ‘lonely’. However, coming on strongly was an understatement for what Yamada was writing. In fact, it was overwhelming as the next paragraph described the many positives that he attributed to Shouta. It was worrisome. Shouta’s face as he surfed the continual contents took on a rather unappealing flush. Flattery was uncommon, and the sudden discomfort he received from this overpool tempted him to close the notebook and just pretend like it never existed. At this rate, Shouta might assume that Yamada was infatuated with him--

‘AND I THINK I LIKE-LIKE YOU.’

Crap. 

The flush on his face now resembled a particularly nasty sunburn. Was this supposed to be a confession letter? Was Yamada, a student he barely knew apart from usual interactions, genuinely infatuated with him? Shouta continued reading, just to make sure, but the next paragraph was scribbled out by a wicked black pen. The words that were just barely discernible appeared to just be Yamada attempting to justify this crush on ‘A DUDE I DON’T EVEN KNOW THAT WELL.’ At least Yamada was somewhat self aware. 

Shouta attempted to scour the other pages for more, but it was back to silly doodles and miniscule notes that he suddenly didn’t care about anymore. It could be that Yamada wasn’t talking about him... Trying to mollify his growing distress, he flipped back to the page with the confession and double checked if there was anything to even suggest--

Yup. There it was. ‘AIZAWA SHOUTA.’ His name in these bold chicken scratch letters that he was only now getting accustomed to. Points to Yamada for being brave, he supposed… and while Shouta was (Not really? He wasn’t entirely sure himself) incredibly flattered, he just… didn’t know Yamada enough to even contemplate a crush, much less a relationship with the other. Besides, his life was much too unstable at the moment to focus on such things. Then, there was also the fact he wasn’t very interested in it at all. 

His hand came to rub at his red face, hoping it’ll die down and cure his racing heart. This was all right. It was uncomfortable, but he had no worries. He could just replace the notebook where it was and act as if the contents were never swallowed by him. 

The clock on the wall read 15:50. Had he really been in the classroom for this long? It was stupidly fortunate there was no one around, but at the same time, he was one of the few that would continue sticking to his chair after classes were over. So, it was the opportune moment to just slide the notebook back to the floor. Shouta was just about to shut it when the door slid open.

“GIVE ME A SEC, OBORO! I SWEAR I LEFT IT IN--” Yamada turned to lock eyes with Shouta, who stood there absolutely hating the world. Yamada’s loud voice died on his lips, leaving his usual charismatic self absolutely dumbfounded for something to say. Several emotions were immediately discernible in clear order: Surprise. Neutrality. Suspicion. Hard contemplation. Realization, and finally, it settled on absolutely horrendous and blushing panic. 

“I read what you wrote about me,” was the first thing that left Shouta’s stupid mouth. 

“Yeah?” Yamada squeaked. The renowned hero student with the matching vigor to the celebrities on television suddenly became this giggly school girl. It was incredibly strange. Discomfort and concern drenched Shouta from head to toe. 

“And I don’t feel the same way.” Might as well get it out before they were forced to do anything he didn’t want to do. 

It was then the blush that tainted Yamada’s face deepened, and he lowered his gaze to the floor. Fortunately for the both of them, his eyes were covered by those frustrating sunglasses he always wore. When he spoke, it was strained too light, “OH. YEAH, I DIDN’T EXPECT YOU TO, HAHA! THAT’S COMPLETELY ALL RIGHT, YO! SERIOUSLY, I--”

“Stop talking.” 

That got Yamada to shut up quick, but his eyebrow did twitch in irritation.

Shouta had to do this… delicately. Delicate wasn’t his style, but he felt bad. Guilt was a heavy thing, and the green notebook in his hands weighed him with the burden of the world. “I didn’t mean to look through your stuff, and you’re… annoying.”

Yamada’s fists tightened. 

Okay, not the right words. 

“Not annoying, I mean…” Shouta attempted to replace this heaviness in his chest with air. “I don’t know this friend or romance thing and I really shouldn’t have read what you wrote. That wasn’t right… but even though I say some pretty… bad things, what you wrote about me was really nice, and that should mean something. And… I think… you’re pretty cool too… even if the marker you use makes me eyes bleed.” Silence. The quiet he would consider blissful was suddenly grating. “And your designs were nice,” he tacked on lamely. 

“Thanks,” Yamada mumbled, uncharacteristically quiet. Shouta couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or not. 

What was Shouta doing? Grr… He knew he was a terrible kid, but he didn’t know what to say next. Words would be insincere, and all he knew to offer up was a ‘sorry’ on a plate. Action. Action, that was what heroes were for right?

“Just because I don’t know you well or feel the same way, doesn’t mean… uhm… it can’t happen? It’ll be nice if we… can maybe talk more or something?” he said wobbly. He was on a dangerous tightrope. Admittedly, Yamada was annoying sometimes. But, that particular adjective applied to everyone he knew, even friends he had in the past. But, judging from what he had read in the notebook, Shouta now knew Yamada was wickedly creative, hopeful, and always filled to the brim and boiling with energy. Sure, maybe Yamada was distractible, messy, and carefree, but everyone in the world had those ticks to them that kept them ticking. So… that was something. 

Apparently, Yamada was less than convinced by those trembled words. Instead, he approached, snatched the notebook from Shouta’s hands, and grated a little, “Yeah, no thanks. Don’t really want to hang out with someone who tells me to shut up.”

Shouta cursed under his breath. “That-- I really didn’t mean that. I’m really really sorry, I’ve never talked to you and no one’s ever confessed to me before so, I really don’t know how to act. But, you… sound cool… I’m sorry.”

It was then that Yamada unleashed a groan, a little harrowed chuckle breaking past his lips. “Man,” he said, “I’m WAY too tired for this kinda stuff.” Tucking the notebook, the whole root of their current interaction, under his arm, he made his way for the door, but before he stepped through the threshold, he gave a half hearted suggestion, “How about lunch tomorrow? If you hate me, then we won’t have to talk ever again and I’ll get over you. But if you don’t, then… I dunno, we’ll see from there, yeah?” 

Shouta could only nod hollowly. He considered apologizing once more, but Yamada was gone before the words could bubble in his chest. The door was shut, and far away, he could hear Yamada’s yelled greeting to Shirakumo. 

[itwill-comeback]

More headcanons bb

☆ Someone [Tomas] implanted a huge phobia of hospitals and doctors in Vlad like "If you ever get taken to a hospital they're gonna figure out that you're not human and dissect you like a frog, you'd be a freak science experiment" and 1. Vlad only feels safe in hospitals with Nelly and 2. Thanks for making him feel like even more of a freak you punkass and 3. When he woke up post-staking and was just like "Otis is here?" His mind immediately is torn between Fuck That Where's Nelly? & Otis Wouldn't Let Doctors Dissect Me, Right? & What happened to Joss? Is he here? Am I safe right now?

☆ Nelly knows he gets antsy in hospitals even when she's with him, but doesn't know why. She tries to talk him into coming by while she's working and meeting her coworkers but he just digs his heels in, full stop "Nah, I'm-- I'm okay... thanks tho"

☆ Also once he got into his teens and all his doctor's visits involved the doctor offering to speak with him privately without Nelly in the room just makes him damn near have a panic attack every time and outright refusing to let people draw his blood because NopeNopeNope I'mNotHumanGoAway!

☆ Getting his wisdom teeth removed and demanding he get all four of those teeth back because he doesn't want anyone to have his DNA.

☆ Normal Elysians never have to deal with this issue because vampires actually love the medical field. They can easily convince humans around them to give them a raise or help then with an overnight shift or donate money to the hospital or be more understanding about wait times or agree to a better treatment or forgive medical debt because everyone who has to deal with anything within a stone's throw of the medical field, either as a patient or hospital staff, is just consistently overworked, underpaid or just outright frazzled and exhausted. This leaves their minds open to persuasion and vampires use that to their advantage a lot.

☆ Never understood why vampires in movies can't handle being around humans in hospitals because oh no they might bleed! Like dude come on I could smell the most delicious food on the planet and still the other smells of Hospital just kill any appetite I might have. I'm supposed to believe people with super senses wouldn't get nauseating headaches at the smell of all that disinfectant and bleach and latex and sweat and chemicals and medicine and death and holy hell those bright ass lights? There's nothing appetizing in a hospital for folks with regular senses. Vampires at best just adapt to the senses onslaught that is the inside of a hospital and bear it for the sake of helping people.

☆ Also fuck the idea that vampires inherently just don't give a fuck about people. We see a few instances of people not immediately noticing the difference between humans and vampires and I honestly think vampires would rather help every person that needs their help than be picky about who gets much needed medical attention.

☆ On top of that even if vampires don't necessarily want to help people because it's the right thing to do, they could just as well be in it for the money because they would make fucking phenomenal doctors with their super senses and their extreme precision and attention to detail. Also just imagine the bedside manner of someone who can literally read your mind. They know exactly what you're afraid of and exactly what you want to hear, and what you need to hear.

☆ Otis tells Vlad about cool stuff Elysia made like chess, cities, and Sony, but he doesn't even think to mention all the brilliant accomplishments of Elysian doctors and scientists because there are so many, you could write a book about all the stuff vampires figured out as time went on in the medical field alone.

☆ And all that stuff about "this hasn't changed in the medical field in the past 70/80/100 years" Yeah that's because lots of vampires don't appreciate change if it isn't absolutely necessary. There's a lot of "When I was just a premed fledgling we still used brass doorknobs that disinfected themselves and now everybody wants stainless steel everything ugh"

☆ Add to that that it's usually free for doctors to sit in on lectures and classes about new medical stuff so that their practice methods don't become dated and vampire doctors literally get to watch humanity get better at medicine.

☆ Elysians almost certainly knew about bacteria and infection since before the plague but couldn't explain it to humans without betraying their secret so they had to use the right methods with the wrong science behind it to get stuff done. Ex. Plague doctors wore masks, gloves, long coats and boots, and had canes to keep distance from people but since they couldn't explain the concept of airborne disease to humans they just went "uhhh, the air is dirty? The stench of death spreads the plague so I wear this mask with herbs in it which protects me from the miasma? Gloves and cane so I don't have to touch sick people? Touching is bad, people are dirty?" And humans just went with it. Historians be like "They were wrong, but their methods were right! How observant mankind was!"

☆ Tomas was hailed as a great help with hunting during the plague times but fuck him, if anyone's gonna know who's healthy and who isn't it's the vampire doctors and they no doubt showed active disdain for Tomas going around and killing the few healthy humans left in any given populace. Like if you just take those humans as drudges and make sure they stay healthy you can share them with other vampires and then some people survive the sickness! They have antibodies for the plague! Don't kill them!

☆ So no doubt vampires cover all of the medical field and can easily keep information about Elysian patients out of the hands of human staff and helped shape privacy in the medical field (things like not reading through people's medical records unless it's necessary, laws that keep your medical information protected) but also the definite pursuit of Elysians to figure out what their biology is and isn't capable of, figuring out why they can't catch sicknesses and why they're allergic to garlic and how drinking blood of all things sustains their bodies.

☆ Can you imagine how dope it would've been if Nelly had lived and married Otis and become a vampire and just had so much further knowledge about medicine given to her? At first it's difficult for her to get passed all the sensory overload of the hospital but once she does she's absolutely ten times happier at her job? Night shifts are a blessing and she's happy to take them to let her human coworkers get home to their families? I'm always big heart eyes for Nelly, but fledgling nurse Nelly?? Is so so good?? One downside is that Vlad is even more insistent that they both get out of bed before he leaves the house because trauma.

☆ All her coworkers think she's so perky because she got married and finally has someone at home to help her and she's now got an empty nest and literally they're all just like "ooo girl! Marriage looks so good on you! How's your boy? He doing good at Stokerton University? How's your new hubby?? When is he gonna come by so we can meet him??" And she also gains new friends through meeting all her vampire coworkers I'm 💖💖💖 love one newlywed nurse!

☆ Vlad meeting vampire medical staff who [despite being super intrigued by his biology] are very understanding to his anxieties about hospitals and try to help him overcome his fears. This sweet anxious halfling gets his blood drawn for the first time in his life at age 18 and is super relieved to see that all the stuff they do is noninvasive and really not that bad.

☆ All the DNA analysis stuff they tell him about is sorta lost on him because he doesn't speak doctor lmao, but Nelly is super intrigued and can explain it to him in regular people terms.

☆ Also Elysian psychologists help him recognize that his dad planted that fear in his mind so that he'd avoid hospitals and avoid most things so that he'd probably never meet any Elysians. And probably also to distance himself from his aunt who Tomas likely saw as an obstacle and just in general he wanted Vlad to be distrustful of everyone and avoidant of others, especially people who would try to help him.

☆ Vlad makes fledgling friends at college and admits he has a phobia of hospitals and one of his friends is like "Dude don't be afraid of hospitals, doctors are super nice! I'm gonna be a doctor soon, I wouldn't dissect you 🥰" and another one's all "I'm gonna become a nurse, like your aunt! Medical staff are legit just normal people with good hearts! You have nothing to be afraid of." And it just completely shakes Vlad's view of medical staff as mad scientists who want to cut him open.

☆ Not that Vlad didn't have enough trauma to get therapy for [the staking, the fire, the attempted soul snatching, being bitten by crazies, his friends and family almost being killed, Tomas fucking Tod, almost draining his girlfriend, his abandonment issues, ect.] I just genuinely think being afraid of hospitals is a natural thought process for someone who's the first half-vampire half-human in the world. Also Tomas would do some shit like that to Vlad, never plant any phobia of something that would help him like slayer phobia or garlic phobia, but something he would almost certainly need someday? Like medical treatment? Yeah, let's make him afraid of that, Tomas. That's a great idea.

☆ As a little not medical related thing, I think even though Vlad said he didn't care what Otis did with the house when he was renovating it, I think he definitely was a little bit inclined to have Otis use stuff that was flame resistant and almost certainly put like four fire extinguishers in different spots in the house and was real particular about getting good blinds and drapes for the windows. Also no way in hell does he let Otis get a gas stove.

[opes-magnas]

those two days.

A wise man once said, ”The bad news is, nothing lasts forever and the good news is, nothing lasts forever.”

That’s freaking bullshit. Whoever told that hasn’t gone through the amount of trauma I’ve been through, which made every single moment feel like an eternity. Oh wait! I should’ve explained it more graphically.

Every single second felt like I was being skinned alive and being rolled over in salt and then fried in burning hot oil, then my limbs being torn out of my body and I could probably go on forever. In short, my time as a mortal on this planet has been miserable.

My mother and father were the epitome of love, they were the ideal couple who fell in love as soon they laid eyes on each other and the middle of their story is so cliché I’d rather let you imagine it in the most typical way possible and the end of it is, they got married!

They sadly never had their happily ever after cause they then got pregnant with me.

(After 9 months of my mother craving weird things)

He kept pacing the length of the waiting room, anxious, his face was dripping with perspiration and his brows were knitted in deep thought, his hands were clasping and unclasping and fidgeting with his jacket.

* Piano playing a sad note*

He hears the OR doors opening and rushes towards the doctor and shakes that poor guy until he’s pale. The doctor says that there were a lot of complications with his wife’s pregnancy and that they could save only one of them, and his wife told them to save his child and that he now has a healthy 4.5 pound baby boy.

He fell to the ground. How could he even live without his beloved wife! His moon and stars, his better half! He felt so utterly devastated.

Sometimes when people lose the very thing that defines their life, the very thing that they lived and breathed for, they lose faith and when that happens there is no coming back.

I think this was that moment for my father. I’ve always wondered how anyone could love anything so intensely. But I guess love is a very elusive thing which sadly won’t fit into the bounds of words.

I can try to make sense of though, from what I’ve seen, love is when my father returned home after a tired day of work and as soon as he saw the face that opened the door, he could find calmness in spite of all the chaos surrounding him. One of the biggest regrets of my life is that I couldn’t see and feel that pure unconditional love.

Anyways, in my bittersweet flashback my father also gets to know that it was my mother’s intentional decision to give her life in order to save mine.

So, from that day my father loathed to see my face. As every time he looked at me, I reminded him of the day he lost the purpose of his life. He became an alcoholic and just gave me money to do whatever the hell I want with it.

I never actually went to school regularly, used to bunk most of the time. But that didn’t matter because I passed somehow by cheating and my street smartness. But, it really hit me when I flunked my senior year and all of my friends went to Ivy League colleges, while I was left to attend my dreadful senior year AGAIN with a bunch of crackpots.

Though, that wasn’t the part that made me lose my sense of self- dignity. It was when the look of nonchalance on my father’s face when he heard the former news. Even this far in life I didn’t have goal or any plans to look forward to. This part kept me most of the nights and stole any little peace of mind I had left.

Then I attended community college in hopes of at least getting proper education. In college, I couldn’t stick to any one major for a year as I was pretty fickle minded about it.

One sunny happy day, birds are chirping, I’m braying Beyoncé’s halo and enter the college premises to see this guy snogging my girlfriend. My fury knows no bounds as I beat the shit out of him then I get to know that my girlfriend had been cheating on me with him for many months. But, it was too late to reconsider my actions as I had probably broken 50 of his bones oops!

Then I got slapped an assault case and got expelled from college for disgracing them. This particular joke that I’m about to say is a big touché moment but humour at my expense has been a trend I’ve experienced everywhere so hell with it.

I got expelled from a freaking community college with drug addicts, goons, people who have flunked their freshman year about 3 times go to. And I have been expelled from such a college for “disgracing them”!!!

Go on laugh yourself out.

But a tiny ray of hope appeared after a jumbo combo of disappointment with a side of bad luck and a dollop of ugly fate. I was discovered by the basketball scouts and got a chance to play in the local league and if I did play well, I had a chance of playing ball in college! They absolutely loved me. I had gotten so used to people being disappointed in me that I was so unsure of myself when people really appreciated me.

But as you know of my series fuck ups I had to screw this one too. But, this one was the most epic of them all. I had a few shots in before the game just to you know, bring that edge.

During the game, when I was passed the ball, my drunken brain thought it was the head of my ex-girlfriend and I started smashing the ball against my head (which my brain thinks as a pathetic attempt of kissing “her” or rather “it”). So, at the end, everyone thought I was some lunatic and I got kicked off the field (literally).

I finally let go of all the little self-respect I had and applied for a job as a cashier at McDonalds. And the reply from them was the single most embarrassing moment of my life.

I got rejected!

Then I heard a call saying that my grandpa had died but he had also left me the family mansion, which I assume is out of pity for being ignored for most of my life. This was just in time (not my grandpa’s death of course! Gee I’m not so devoid of emotion!) as I was being kicked out of my apartment due to not paying rent for past 3 months and needed a place to crash.

But, aside from that I was a 23 year old man with no job, no girlfriend, and no degrees to show for, no friends and absolutely broke. I should be the poster boy for the word “miserable” (at least that way I’ll make some profit out of my pathetic existence of a life).

The mansion looks absolutely beautiful from outside. It has a huge dome at the centre with 2 parapets flanking its either sides. The entire dome is made of tinted blue glass which makes it look like it’s a part of the sky but a glistening one filled with hand painted butterflies, hummingbirds, Macau’s and various other exotic species of birds.

The front lawn is as exorbitant as a rare and secret meadow left untouched by mankind, where the flowers unknown grow at their own liberty, unrestricted where bees hover over them making a slight buzzing sound . The whole estate looks so unreal and glorious, it is like a medieval castle left untouched.

But, all I could feel by looking at it was dejection. I felt even this wonderful piece of architecture was looming over and looking at me in pity. I sighed heavily and gathered my meagre possessions and stepped inside.

It was even more splendid from the inside. I don’t know what I’ll do with so much space, I could fit all of my things in the pantry closet! I just lay down on the plush divan to take a small nap because thinking about my wretched life made my mind blackout and heavy like I’d had a few too many tequila shots.

“Poor boy, how can anyone’s life be so tragic and pitiable!?” said pride, wiping off the tears rolling down its cheek, “I know what a troubled childhood feels like, even my mother was too haughty to admit that she had become too fat because of giving birth to me and she never looked at me with a hint of motherly affection, it totally damaged my self-confidence.”

“As if you ever had it to begin with! You appeared to be so full of yourself in front of people but deep down you’re a pathetic little wimp!”

“Stop it envy! See, you made him cry, aren’t you living up to your name! Always jealous of others! I know it’s like we can invade his privacy, by taking a peek at his thoughts, but this boy can’t even defend himself. He doesn’t get angry at all when people talk all sorts of things about him! How can he even live with himself!”

“Now now, anger you don’t upset yourself too much, your BP is gonna skyrocket. All this boy needs to do is to get laid man! He so uptight, he needs to loosen up a little and take a chill pill.”

“I totally agree with you, said Sloth, he needs to take some time out for himself and have a little self’-introspective nap once in a while right, Glutton?”

“All you ever do is take naps! And anyways he needs to round up and appear fuller, he’s such a scrawny kid! Eat more spaghetti and meatballs!”

“You’re awfully quiet Greed, speak up man this isn’t like you! You’re always complaining that you don’t as much time to speak”.

“Yeah dude, it’s just I’ve never seen any man not having even basic survivalist desires. We gotta help this fella.”

“Okay then roll up your sleeves gentlemen and ugh *cough* cough* sorry woman, we got some work to do!”

I opened my eyes and nearly peed myself in the pants, in front of me were six men and woman, I screamed like a cat dunked in a bucket of water!

“Hey Yo mate, chill down, we’re just here to help”, said a boy who was in his teens clearly by the amount of acne on his face and the ripped jeans and hoodie he wore further justified my guess, he wore a badge called “sloth”

What a weird name, I thought. Who would like to be named after the sloth bear!

“Yo, for the fact the sloth bear was named after me!”

“Now, sloth you need to follow your own words, the boy must be scared shitless. By the way, I’m Greed, nice to meet you too and that rude fellow was Sloth.”, spoke a middle aged man with a rather baggy shirt and tight jeans.

“Guys let’s introduce ourselves to make it easier for him. Hello young fellow, I’m Glutton!”, said a shirtless man whose abs glistened with sweat as though he’d come from a workout.

“Hello kitten, I’m Anger.”, said a strikingly beautiful woman with a purple dress synched at the waist with a Gucci belt and black stilettos.

“Greetings from the better part of hell dear, I’m Envy.”, said a man with a formal attire and red horn-rimmed glasses.

“Morning, I’m Pride.”, said a tall man wearing an expensive Armani suit, reebok sunglasses and slick blonde hair.

“Hi, I’m Lust.” ,he whispered, God he must be the male-version of Aphrodite! He was enough to turn a straight man like me, gay.

(I gave such detailed description of them, as they keep recurring and I wanted you guys to see them exactly like I did.)

“Umm. Hi, I’m max I guess.”, I blurted.

“God! We need to work on your self-confidence boy! Okay I’ll tell you why we’re here. While you were napping, we looked into your past and thought you might need a little boost to help you live a better life. So, each of us will help you in their own area of expertise and ooh! I almost forgot we are here only for two days, so buckle up!”

Have become schizophrenic?! I am hearing voices in my head!

“Relax honey, we are visible and audible only to you.”, Anger said.

“Humph okay, what should I do to get rid of you lot?”

Quit the sarcasm brother, first we need to get a good workout. Come on move your ass, and Glutton then pulled me away for what seemed like forever and made me workout like hell. The workout was so intense, I was so sore I couldn’t move a muscle and every time I got up my butt ached.

But, when I looked in the mirror, I couldn’t believe my eyes, my body looked like it was photo shopped! Six pack abs, killer thighs, amazing collar bone and to top it off a chiseled jaw! I looked like a Greek God!

Then, without wasting a minute, Sloth whisked me into the kitchen which was filled with amazing food and magazines. He told me, “You know what mate, you need to take some time out for yourself and make yourself happy once in a while.”

I never forgot those words.

I ate to my stomach’s fill, of course only healthy foods allowed (Glutton approved- check). Then my slot was with Anger.

We took a walk and were talking everyday stuff when she pulled me into a McDonald’s. I resisted as I had just eaten the feast of my life, but she insisted and made me sit down in a booth.

“Sometimes anger in the right direction is okay.”

Then a waiter came and asked for our order, before we could even blink an eye, he started bellowing out like a cow belching and started telling people that I was the specimen of a man who got rejected even from a McDonald’s job and thought a ball was his ex-girlfriend!

People around me started taking selfies and snaps of me and posting it on social media.

Anger whispered, “You need to defend your honour, sugar. No one is going to do it for you.”

I mustered all the courage I had left in me and punched that guy in his face. I pulled Anger away and we made for the run.

After the running all the way to house, I told her, “I never felt so exhilarated and satisfied in my entire life!”

“But, remember kitten, anger only in the right direction and for the right cause, like you defending your honour for example.”

Will remember, Ms. Anger.

Then Pride and Greed approached me together and took me into my room and gave my laptop.

“Listen son, you are quite capable and intelligent, all you need is to believe in yourself a little more and go after the things you want.” , Pride said. “So you need to write an essay to get into Ivy League colleges with full scholarship, so begin writing.”

I bit my lip. Just believe in yourself.

Then I wrote my essay by pulling an all-nighter and submitted it.

I could feel someone shaking me hardly, I rubbed my eyes and opened them reluctantly only to see Greed pulling off my blankets and telling me to get ready for a small basketball session.

We then drove over to the Baltimore city gym, I then realized he had brought me to the basketball try-outs for the city’s team!

Believe in yourself.

After almost half a day, we returned home then Lust dragged me into various clothing stores and dressed me up and told me to remember one girl who had impacted me the most.

Then, I thought how I could miss the one girl who stood with me through thick and thin! She never doubted me! Suddenly I could remember all the subtle hints she gave throughout the time we were friends, and I, a fool, never paid her enough attention, trying to go after girls who were popular!

Oh Sarah! Then I saw the smirk on Lust’s face and knew he was the one who helped me clear my thoughts.

He murmured, “Go! You moron.”

I rushed to my car and drove to Sarah’s house and almost punched a hole into her front door trying to knock.

The door opened, and when I saw her face, I found calm in midst of all chaos of my mind, guess I finally got to see the true love I always yearned for.

I gave her my true confession with gulps in between.

She told, “I thought you’d never realize.”

I pulled her waist close to me, and whispered in her ear, “Better late than never” and tucked the hair on her cheek behind her ear and kissed her like I’d never see her again.

Well, two days passed within a blink of an eye, and yet I have changed so much, grown into a better man. Oh! Only Envy hadn’t had his chance to speak to me.

I then told Sarah I’d see her tomorrow and drove back to the house to see all of them standing on my front porch. I got down and t and went and hugged each one knowing it was time to say our goodbyes.

Envy stepped forward, “Max, we always knew you were a special young man, but always remember that when you succeed, there are always gonna be people who will envy you and try to bring you down, you have to then remember how hard you worked to get there and say, fuck you assholes and stay put.”

“I love you guys; do you have to go?”

“Yes child, but we will be watching you, okay?”

Goodbye.

When I was going to unlock the front door, I saw my reflection on the glass, and I then I realized that I was always like this, but I never saw myself for what I really am.

I measured my life by milestones and achievements all along, never realizing those small moments where I was the best possible version of myself.

I guess, the old wise man was correct.

Epilogue – After a year

I am so busy right now, I don’t even have the time to write this, but I know you guys I are curious of what happened after that.

I got selected to play college ball for Princeton University with a full scholarship. Sarah and I are in a very serious relationship and we are thinking of getting married after college, oh and by the way, she also got accepted to Princeton.

I also work as a part time model for Vogue (who knew!) I think I may be playing for the NBA next year.

And I made things right with my father and actually forgave him of all his shortcomings.

I am so grateful and happy for those two days last year, though I still think my mind is playing tricks with me as I went back the McDonald’s store and asked the guy whom I punched if he remembered me and he gave this weird look .

Anyways, you guys might have thought I have finally achieved something, but I think otherwise. I am still so very insecure about myself in a thousand different ways. But when I wake up in the morning, I am so grateful for being given this life in contrast to before when I used to wonder my purpose.

~ Lady Lazarus

[migleefulmoments]

Abby is the 1 who needs a reading comprehension lesson. An anonymous person said 'You're a narrow-minded fool if you actually put any stock in whether or not a married man is wearing his ring.' Abby's reply was 'Never once did I or anyone I know say that a married person has to wear a ring.' Am I crazy or is that totally 2 different things? Sometimes Abby is so blind it makes me crazy. Also, if u could do a follow up to her blatherings re her post it would be great. I'm just gobsmacked over it.

I see you wrote another post clarifying it was Cassie who made the comments you quoted but the entire coven’s comments after Cassie just get more ridiculous- “fact” after “fact” of lies and nonsense comparisons.  It’s batty that they believe any of the lies- but they believe them all! 

Anonymous asked: My grandpa doesn't wear his wedding ring because he used to work as an AC/heating repair man (he even taught college courses on fixing heaters at one point) and then was just not in the habit when he retired. That doesn't make his and grandma's marriage less valid. Rings are a symbolic thing that most cultures don't even do. You're a narrow-minded fool if you actually put any stock in whether or not a married man is wearing his ring.

cassie1022 answered: Oh yay, fun. (Cassie -always so charming)  My dear Nonnie, once again, reading comprehension eludes someone that believes in the Miarren myth. Never once did I or anyone I know say that a married person has to wear a ring (and yet Abby pops in below to claim the same but then argue that it IS the ring coming and going that looks suspicious. Let’s pretend that cc rings were real- he didn’t wear them every day regardless of what Abby claims.). Some people don’t wear them because they work with their hands, like your grandpa, and some just don’t feel comfortable wearing them. Let’s be real though. D has never shown an aversion to wearing rings. He’s worn them quite often, even while playing a show (yes, but he also took them off.  It’s his prerogative.  Until he says he’s getting divorced, it’s none of our business). There was a time when the only time he DIDN’T have a ring on was while he was in character (so what? He has had his wedding ring on most times we’ve seen him. You are counting individual photos as entire days and that isn’t accurate)

That being said, let’s examine. When was the last time you think D fixed a car, operated heavy machinery, or, like your grandpa, fixed an AC unit or heater?  (You have no idea what he does in his spare time.  This is a gross comment-some people do things with their hands -build things- because they enjoy it)  (Maybe if he could do that, people wouldn’t be making their own sweat gravy when they go to TSG.)(So now we start with the lies and mischaracterizations. FUN. There are two comments from TSG claiming A/C was broken. Since likely Mia doesn’t own the building, she has no control over the A/C being broken). 

As I’ve already said, rings aren’t for everyone, but I’ve also pointed out that D has been an avid ring wearer most of his life, and there is more than enough photographic evidence to support this. Also, most couples that exchange rings don’t usually stop wearing them in the first year of marriage.(And he hasn’t stopped wearing his now has he?) That’s when it’s usually a point of pride and you want the world to know you are someone’s spouse. (Does Darren seem like the kind of person who is worried about “the world knowing he’s someone’s spouse”? He’s pretty open about his relationship and taking his ring off for an hour or two isn’t indicative of anything).

You know what DOES make a marriage less valid? No legitimate officiant.(LIE)  There are only a handful of states where you can officiate your own marriage, and guess what? Louisiana isn’t one of them.(He didn’t, Joe did)  You need an ordained minister and in addition to that, the minister must register in the parish where the marriage is taking place.

So, if this makes me a “narrow-minded fool,” so be it. I’ve been called worse. (It definitely does).  

ajw720 I needed to laugh this morning, thank you nonnie.(I would imagine you need to laugh a hell of a lot more than you do Abby)  You people really don’t get it (Oh lord).  Also, it isn’t JUST the ring (which is very suspicious especially as he deliberately takes it off at random times, there one minute gone the next) (Here abby argues it isn’t the ring.... except it is the ring) , it is as @cassie1022 pointed out, no officiant (LIE) , weird wedding algorithm (the fact that Abby truly believes there was a guest algorithm says everything there is to say about Abby’s judgment and the cc nonsense)  is FAMILY HONEYMOON (a joke)  constant babysitters (LIE) d’s complete lack of enthusiasm (he practically said he was bored and realized at the last moment that that was bad) (Desperate Abby, you're so desperate) , talked about pooping exes as opposed to how life changed with his bride (and you don’t get that this is was keep from speaking about his personal life? How long have you been a fan? Joking about something to distract from having to answer something private is spot-on Darren), speaks more passionately about his jacket then his wedding (we done got hitched) (This means nothing Abby...NOTHING. He wrote a boring post about his jacket and you’ve been losing your shit over it ever since. IT meant nothing...it was a coat he wore to an event. You only like it because he was boring and serious. It was the farthest thing from Darren I’ve ever read.), announced the engagement using a reference to the wrong freaking franchise (I can’t...this is one of your dumbest arguments out of a lot of arguments. It was a JOKE Abby, a joke.  He used the franchise that made the joke funny. Darren doesnt’ own a franchise)   , FIVE FUCKING encagement rings (LIE), the last of which is an advertisement that she is paid to wear and they haven’t even tried to hide this fact (LIE), utter lack of chemistry (again desperate Abby) , the weirdness with his non-relationship but clear friendship of sorts with his ex co-star (It’s not “weirdness” it’s a nonrelationship-you said it yourself). , the way she is promoted that is beyond excessive for someone who isn’t famous (This entire rant is unhinged. Nobody is promoting her, he’s living his life with her.  Like we expect he would with his wife. There is nothing untoward with their behavior together.  The fact that you have to label it “promotion” says that it worries you a lot). the fact that the sold their entire wedding to about 100 sponsors )(LIE) (I am sure there are more than we even realize), the clear references to fandom at the sham mockery (OMG Abby, give it up. Nobody cares about you), and that this allegedly private couple also released 85% of their wedding for public consumption (They released 27 photos. That is HARDLY 85% of their wedding. You saw a lot of the same photos posted by their friends and it upset you but they didn’t release 85% of their wedding. It was a 4-day event and the wedding events started at around 3 pm and lasted until after midnight -27 is not 85% of 10-ish hours of celebration).  

If it was ONLY that he randomly took his ring off depending on how the wind is blowing, fine, that is evidence alone of nothing.  All of these things, and hundred and hundreds of other facts (which are ALL LIES). (inconsistent timelines (Darren doesn’t owe you a “consistent timeline” that’s asinine)   they don’t know where they met each other RC handshakes (You know that isn’t a handshake- they were photographed together right before the “handshake’ you won’t let go of and he’s heard introducing her as his girlfriend ), D running from her every moment he can, etc, etc)(Whatever you tell yourself to sleep at night), are clear evidence it is fake that is beyond a reasonable doubt (Bwahahahahaha you are conning yourself Abby) .  Him kissing her in her bar is his job.  I suggest nonnie you pay attention to the details (Which ones- your lies or the real details?) And please pay attention to the captain, he hasn’t even been subtle lately, he has been fairly blatant (Le sigh, he isn’t the captain.  He’s a dude who loves his boyfriend Will and writes children’s books that are not cc Bibles) .

Happy Thanksgiving Nonnie!  I hope you can tear yourself away from reading blogs you disagree with long enough to enjoy your friends and family! Cheers!

notes-from-nowhere What love are you talking about, anon? M doesn’t love D and she makes this clear every chance she get (LIE- there is nothing that suggests MIa isn’t in love with Darren). Do I have to remind you how she denied to D’s mom one red carpet to celebrate her son? (LIE Abby fabricated)  Or to D’s dad to be honored for his military past?(another LIE Abby fabricated)  But why listing all of her actions when you know very well this is only the surface.

Btw, I still have to know a singer/actor lost a finger because of a wedding band. Anon, try again, this attempt failed. (SMH)

leka-1998 You know what I like about this instance in particular? Apart from the fact that the ring isn’t off the whole time, he’s still wearing the other one here.

After 284719 years, she should also know what the language D’s mom speaks is called. Seems she doesn’t care enough. (Another LIE that Abby fabricated) 

Also, former platonic roomie says hello. (LIE) 

ajw720

They still can’t explain away B/enny, the man D just praised for his new album yet D hasn’t even mentioned his brother’s (I can’t explain it but it has nothing to do with Darren and Mia.  You’re the one making it a problem) .  The man that mocked fandom on his IG by referring to M/oulin R/ouge when posting about the fraud in NOLA (Nobody-especially Ben Hudson- gives a shit about fandom Abby. You’re a nobody)  The man who seemingly officiated the wedding (Again a LIE)  And the one who appears to have a dog (yes he does, he lives with his girlfriend, Joanna, and their two dogs) . Hey remember just a few weeks ago when PBB dropped her teeth in the dog’s bowl? Funny as we know she and D don’t have a dog (Nope, they clearly don’t- stop trying so hard).…

[junk-yard-hearts]

Poly Bowers Gang HC’s

o lookie lookie 

Belch (I prefer calling him Reg or Reggie to Belch tbh)-

·         I see Reggie as more of the enforcer within their group dynamic.

·         The other guys can get kind of carried away and he’s the first to tell them to leave you the hell alone if he thinks they’re making you uncomfortable

·         After a thorough fucking he’s the one who’d gently kiss your temple and tell you how good you were

·         He always lets you sit in the front seat and glares over his shoulder at the others when they whine about it. As far as he’s concerned, it’s HIS car and you deserve the front seat, dammit. (He actually just wants to watch the sun hit your face and keep you away from Patrick)

·         The other guys give him hell because he’s so sweet on you but he just can’t help how much he adores you awe

·         The others laugh because you would never call him Belch and he blushes every time you call him Reggie

·         He’s the one you’d call after all your best friends stood you up for your girls-night-in sleepover plans. He’d hear your disappointed voice and the sniffles and sigh. He shows up at your house 20 minutes later with the fuckboy squad in toe.

·         You ask if he’d do a face mask with you and he looks panicked as fuck

·         But the second you hit him with those lovey eyes, he relents

·         The other guys sit around and snicker as you apply cerulean goo to his face but he couldn’t care less because the smile on your lips is everything to him tbh.

·         Henry tells him he’s such a girl, and Belch hits him with some “a real man would do anything to put a smile on his girl’s face” shit and Henry just slinks tf away

·         He drives you to school every day, and sometimes when your parents aren’t home, he comes in and eats breakfast with you and helps you finish getting ready.

·         He helps you pull your hair back and ties your shoes for you awawawe

·         Always opens your car door for you

·         You wear his t-shirts to school after spending the night with him and he gets all heart-eyed and thinks you look so cute.

·         He sees you in your faded jeans, with a bow in your hair, and his ratty Judas Priest shirt on and his cheeks get all hot cause he just thinks you’re the cutest.

·         For his birthday, you go to his house while he’s at work and you and his mom cook him his favorite dinner (chicken parmesan and fettucine), and you and the gang hang up a banner and surprise him.

·         You didn’t have much money so you made him a cassette mix tape and take them to the bakery on main street for cupcakes, and you all serenade him right there on the sidewalk outside the shop.

·         He tries SO HARD to keep up with your friend drama because he likes that you come to him to talk but fuck, you have so many friends. Who’s Trish?? Where tf did Emma come from? When the hell did Lisa come into the picture?

·         Takes care of you on your period like his mom told him to.

 Victor  

·         Vic is the one you go to about your friend drama and knows exactly what you’re talking about.

·         “Oh my god who does Lisa think she is talking to Gemma about you like that? I’ll kick her ass idc.”

·         Says goodbye with a firm slap on the ass

·         Smiles at the tiny squeak you make every time he slaps the ass

·         Always gives you candies out of the pockets of his vest

·         He says he keeps them to put a smile on your face and you know he stole that shit

·         Loves to rest his head in your lap and let you play with his hair

·         He gets this blissed out, barely conscious look when you gently scrape your nails across his scalp

·         Stares in slack-jawed appreciation when you wear those little skirts that sway when you walk

·         When you’re having a bad day, he paints your nails

·         He notices you getting nervous and scraping the polish off and just grabs your hand away and squeezes it.

·         Smacks Patrick over the head for making lewd comments about your body in public

·         “Dude, watch your fucking mouth, she’s a lady.”

·         You have study hall together, and you sit with your Walkman cassette player in between you, listening to KISS and holding hands, and reading your English class assignments

·         KISS is so not his cup of tea but he doesn’t mind them.

·         He knows you love them so he sits put and listens anyway

·         He learns all the words to all the songs on Smashes Thrashes and Hits from how often you listen to it.

·         You two smoked weed together and the guys found you laying outside staring at the clouds together being sappy

·         But he kicked their asses for making fun of it

·         You bleach his hair for him because he tried to do it himself and got burns on his head

·         You teach him how to put coconut oil through his hair to prevent burning, damage and uneven processing

·         Henry and Patrick laugh and look on, telling him how soft it is to dye his hair.

·         You turn around and tell them how harsh and dangerous bleach can be to the body and offer to put some on THEIR heads.

·         They scurry tf away

·         He loves to watch you masturbate, and loves when you wear lingerie for them.

·         When you and your boyfriends crashed a party, they went off to torture some people but you and Vic were making out on the stairs while all the girls with crushes on him watched

·         He lowkey loves showing you off at all times

·         For Christmas you made him the coolest sneakers he ever saw

·         You bought a pair of canvas kicks from the thrift store and spent hours painting them, and he fREAKED when he saw them

·         He loves when you wear that peachy smelling lipgloss but he always ends up with shimmer all over his mouth and the guys laugh at him. Worth it tho.

 Henry

·         You tell him you got your nails done and he gets this “The fuck are you tellin’ me for?” look on his face.

·         You frown. He realizes you just want him to act interested and suddenly he’s like AH YES, THE NAILS, THE FINGERNAILS YES THE NAILS ON THESE PARTICULAR FINGERS ARE LOOKING MIGHTY SPIFFY TODAY YES INDEED

·         He notices you painted them his favorite color and has to physically restrain himself from squealing like a schoolgirl because he loves that you love him lmao

·         Talks a major talk about what a ladykiller he is but the first time you take your clothes off and he sees your body in only soft lingerie he just stares in awe and appreciation

·         He thinks you don’t know (but you definitely know) he stole one of your silky pink camisoles and keeps it stuffed under his mattress.

·         He actually wasn’t being pervy, he holds it to him when he sleeps and breathes in that precious smell of delicate perfume and something distinctly you and it blisses him out no matter how stressed he is.

·         Always puts his arm around you in public or holds your hand

·         When its cold and you didn’t wear a jacket to school, he scolds you because he’s concerned for your health and comfort, and puts his jacket around your shoulders.

·         Will beat someone up just for looking at you wrong

·         Always is the guy who says he needs to “Defend your honor”

·         Its endearing but can be a bit much.

·         Always hitting Patrick for disrespecting you

·         Always being hit by Reggie for disrespecting you :^)

·         Is 90000% outraged when you confess an insecurity

·         “What on god’s green earth would you hate your tits for?! Have you fuckin seen them? Your body ‘so fine I’m havin to chase off every man in this damn town, cause they all want my girl.”

·         I think he’d be that boyfriend who if you wore a low cut shirt in public would walk around with his hand covering your cleavage cause that shits his eyes only thank you very much.

·         “Only yours?” you’d tease. “Damn straight.” he’d reply. “But what about Belch? N Pat n Vic?” you’d say, laughing. “OK, now listen here.”

·         Is totally fine sharing you but constantly refers to you as HIS girl.

·         Likes you to know who’s in charge.

·         One time you sucked his fingers clean after he fingered you and he is still recovering tbqh

·         Also one time you called him daddy in public and he came in his fccuccking pants.

·         You didn’t know what to get him for his birthday so you just had him over to spend the night and wore pretty underthings and had a night just the two of you.

·         You cut his hair. You’re always begging him to let you cut the fucking mullet off but he just won’t hear of it. He thinks he looks badass.

·         His hair is really soft tho and you put the mullet into a tiny braid and giggled endlessly.

·         He just quirked his eyebrow up at you and asked If he looked sexy.

·         Lives for validation

·         Tries to offer you aftercare but lowkey useless at it

  Patrick

Patricks are the dirtiest

·         Rarely allowed to be alone with you

·         Loves to say creepy shit just to watch you squirm

·         By far the most dominant and thinks aftercare is stupid lmao

·         He likes that you somewhat want to impress him

·         JEALOUS as hell of how much Henry adores you

·         And really, how much they all adore you

·         One time he got the sense that you might actually be real

·         Which freaks him out, and he can’t shake the feeling

·         He compensates for this by going out of his way to make you uncomfortable

·         Says creepy shit in public

·         Puts his hand up your skirt at the lunch table

·         More or less only touches you because he’s allowed to

·         He likes your hands a lot, he likes holding them, he likes when you touch him with them because they’re so gentle and soft

·         Comes and visits you at night because he just likes to be near you

·         At first it was unsettling but now you’re used to it and know he won’t try anything

·         As scared as everyone already is of the whole gang,

·         They’ll never fuck with you because Patrick is too damn scary

·         You had a one-on-one night once

·         The next day, the gang came over to hang out and you had welts on your chest from where Patrick dripped candle wax on you, bloodied bite marks on your collarbones and were limping

·         Belch punched him in the fucking face

·         He knows you probably liked it but the idea of Patrick getting too carried away without anyone there to stop him worries him

·         (I honestly think he’s just always looking for reason to punch Patrick lmao. If asked why, he’d shake his head and say “that boy ain’t right” mister fuckin hank hill)

·         He likes to brush your hair which is weird to the other guys but you seem ok with it, so…

·         The first time you met his mother she was visibly shocked that someone actually wanted to spend time around him yikes lmao

·         You wear one of his rings on a necklace because it slides off your fingers

·         Gets the roughest with you during sex and the guys are always wary of the fact that you actually seem to enjoy it.

Tip the author 

[boycottphil]

Omg if you're writing usuk can you please do something involving the Beatles/Beatlemania or the British Invasion in general? Theres so much good material there but no one really writes about it. I will love you forever

For context, I am taking fanfic requests!

This was a lot of fun to write! I wasn’t too sure if this is what you meant, anon, but if it’s not, feel free to send another ask! I’d be happy to write more. Anyway, enjoy!

Pairing: UsUk Rating: T Warnings: Strong language, mentions of blood, smoking (cigarettes)  Word count: 2026  

Imagine hundreds of thousands of people screaming your name. Imagine hundreds of thousands of people obsessing over your every step, word, move… Imagine loving every second of the intrusive behaviour displayed by fans.

Arthur, the lead singer of the “best band in history,” lived off of such things. Fame… It brought him joy, joy which he previously thought was impossible for him to feel. He was surrounded by security, yet his favourite moments were those when a fan managed to get to him, and looked at him with amazement in their eyes…

Looked at him as if he were a god.

[[MORE]]

Now, one could say that such thoughts and such behaviour was perhaps a bit… unhealthy. And one would be right. Arthur was sick; getting off on his own fame, and as he gathered more and more fans all over the world with each tour, he felt better. And better.

His band was good, not the best band in the world, per say, but definitely good. Their music was largely enjoyed by a female audience. Girls loved to imagine the songs being sung to them personally. They were written to be perceived that way. No names of girls were mentioned… no hints at any particular gender were given either.

Now, there were rumours, as there always are surrounding any band as huge as Arthur’s. Rumours like selling their souls to the devil, rumours like being robots invested by the government. Rumours like… being gay.

Arthur could only benefit from rumours that claimed he was an alien. It added more mystery to his character, more reasons for people to check out his music, come to his concerts. However…

Rumours that claimed he was gay could destroy his career. The thing is… he is gay. He does not fancy women at all. He couldn’t care less when girls form whole crowds and take off their shirts and bras. He didn’t care about his bandmate’s groupies offering threesomes or foursomes or ogies. He’d rather bang his bandmates if he didn’t despise them all.

He came quite close to having his career ruined, though.

One day, while touring the United States, they stopped in middle-of-nowhere-town of some State that Arthur thought was made up by the Americans to make it to 50 states in the first place. He was still convinced there aren’t 50 of them, but 10 divided into five parts each. But he would not express that opinion. Lest someone shot him for even mentioning the USA in any context that doesn’t presents it as the best country on the planet.

It was a town they were merely passing through, but they had to stop for fuel and food and for the drivers to rest a bit as well. Arthur wore his sunglasses and had clothes on that he wasn’t known for wearing, and decided to walk around town a bit. They had a few hours, and he wasn’t about to pass the opportunity to stretch his legs and turn off his brain a bit. Touring meant little walking and too much work, so moments such as those were few and far between.

He had purchased a box of cigarettes, which he planned to get through before he had to be locked in a fast moving vehicle again; in which he wasn’t allowed to smoke. With a fag already lit and dangling off his lips, he walked out onto the pavement, ready to resume his walk just when…

He was bumped into by some 5 foot 6 tall boy. He groaned as his cigarette fell into a puddle, together with his sunglasses. He grumbled and hurried to retrieve his glasses but, well… the kid already saw.

“Arthur Kirkland?! No way!!” He yelled too loudly, his voice far too deep for what Arthur assumed was a 13 year old boy.

“Shh!” Arthur shushed and then wrapped an arm around the other’s head and covered his mouth so he couldn’t make more noise. He felt screaming behind his hand and the boy seemed to be losing his mind just from being touched. Arthur did love attention… but not in some hick town when he was looking for a quiet place to smoke and meditate until he had to leave again.

He dragged the other into an alley- not a suspicious thing to do at all- and shushed him until the other stopped freaking out. He rambled about being touched and carried by Arthur, all of which was technically true, but it sounded so much more dramatic coming out of the kid’s mouth.

“Okay, listen here, kid-” he started, but was promptly interrupted.

“Kid? I’m 19!” He argued.

Arthur looked annoyed, but slightly less on-edge about dragging him into a dark alley. “Whatever, mate. Just stop screaming like a bloody schoolgirl. I don’t want this whole town to know we’re here. The paparazzi would hound us for hundreds of miles, like they did in the last town this happened in.” He explained as he lit his second cigarette- he was mourning the first.

“So you really are Arthur Kirkland?” The other asked, already taking off the backpack he had on and reaching for the first paper and pen he had. “Would you please sign this?” He asked, his bright blue eyes shining in anticipation.

Arthur frowned, but he took the pen and, without really looking or even thinking about it, produced a perfect loopy signature.

“Whoaa… That’s so cool! My name’s Alfred so could you…”

Arthur added, ‘for Alfred, stay cute’ at the bottom, as he does for all signatures, merely replacing the name.

“You think I’m cute?! Wow, Arthur Kirkland thinks I’m cute!!” Alfred said, his voice so high pitched in excitement that Arthur almost really did think he was cute.

“No, mate- I write that for everyone. Most of my fans are girls, you see and-” once again, he was interrupted.

“But you do think I’m cute! I can tell. You keep looking at me,” Alfred insisted, perhaps a bit cheekily. Arthur blinked, trying not to seem too taken  aback.

“I, uh… I don’t… What?” He was usually never speechless. He always had a way to make a fan swoon over him with smooth comebacks and flirty lines that made girls go absolutely mad. But this was a boy. A boy who had called him out on his obvious interest in him, and a boy who, while excited to see him, clearly didn’t think he was a god.

Weird. He was supposed to always be seen as a god. What else could he be seen as?

“So… if you could keep this meeting to yourself for the next 24 hours, that would be bloody fantastic. Now, if you excuse me…” he mumbled and started walking away. He thought Alfred would be satisfied enough with that; he got an autograph and a hug- sort of. But no…

“So where are you headed now?” Came the American voice of the 19 year old who just decided to tag along.

Arthur felt his blood beginning to boil just a bit. “That is literally none of your business. Literally.” He sighed, exasperated.

Alfred fell into step beside him, keeping up easily even as the Brit tried to speed up. “Aw, come on! I won’t tell. I know how to keep secrets! I’m great at it. This one time, my cousin Austin, he told me that he and his aunt on his mum’s side-”

Arthur stopped abruptly. “How the fuck are you good at keeping secrets?”

“Well… I… You don’t know my cousin Austin, do you?”

Arthur groaned and kept walking, now deciding to ignore Alfred entirely. The teen though; he decided that he would ignore Arthur ignoring him. The Brit continued walking and smoking his cigarette as if Alfred wasn’t right there, and talking his ears off about dinosaurs and spaceships and how much he loved boys and how he knew Arthur could relate and-

Wait.

They had at that point reached a park, which was perhaps the size of two average backyards. There was no one around, and Arthur really appreciated it.

“What do you mean?” Arthur asked, his blood really getting to a simmer.

“Well, you know… You’ve never been seen with a girl, you never touch girls, you don’t talk about girls, you don’t even seem interested to all the girls we just passed while getting here. At all. You’re gay, and I can tell,” Alfred claimed.

“I have absolutely no idea where you get those ideas from. How would you know what I do in my free time?” He crossed his arms, perhaps a bit defensively.

“You look at my lips and arms so much, and you’ve looked at my ass too. I’m not dumb, you know! There’s no shame in being gay, Arthur. It’s all just-”

Arthur was angry at that point. He threw his half finished cigarette to the ground and stepped on it, then turned to face Alfred. “I don’t know who you think you are, but if you’re gay and you think making up lies is going to turn me gay, then forget about it. All right? I don’t even mess with groupies in the first place. Would you kindly leave me the fuck alone now?” He said loudly, keeping his composure enough not to yell at this kid.

“You’re just mean and in denial because you think if you come out that girls will stop obsessing over you. That’s okay. If you don’t want a groupie because all of them are girls, that’s understandable. But I mean… I’m free. I ran away from home a week ago. I have nowhere to be so… I could come with you. Warm your bed at night. Maybe do a few more other things too. Like ride you while you-”

Arthur punched him. He got too heated, too angry, amd he just… threw the punch. His knuckles ached after, and Alfred was holding onto his bleeding nose. It didn’t seem broken, but knowing the consequences of literally punching someone, Arthur began briskly walking away.

He should have expected to see the American again, before he even managed to walk down half a block. How he could cradle a bloody nose and run after him was a miracle.

“That was so rude!! I did not deserve to be fucking punched, man! I was just teasing you, dude! It’s literally not my fault that you are hiding your repressed homosexuality-”

“Stop. Calling. Me. Gay.” He growled, taking one step closer to the teen with each word uttered.

Alfred was practically pinned to a wall just then, looking up at the Brit with wide blue eyes. He was tall and handsome and…

And he kissed Alfred before he could get socked again. Instead of being pushed away and hit, as Alfred expected he would, he was pulled closer and kissed intensely enough to have all the air sucked out of his lungs.

Arthur pulled away seconds later, practically pushing himself off Alfred. Even behind his sunglasses, his eyes looked wide and shocked at what he had done. He looked around, then took Alfred’s hand and ran toward the bus.

He fucked up. He fucked up big time. But that’s okay… No one saw. And if he just kept Alfred with him on tour at all times… No one would find out that he was gay. At all.

“Is everything you need in that backpack?” He asked Alfred, out of breath from running, once they arrived at the bus.

“Yeah, why?” He asked and took off his backpack so he could take some tissues out and clean the blood off his face.

“Good. You’ll be coming with us on tour,” Arthur stated bluntly, not even bothering to listen for a yes or a no. Alfred grinned like a kid and hopped into the bus behind Arthur, already reaching out to cop a feel of his favourite singer’s ass.

Needless to say, Arthur did get himself a groupie. Involuntarily. And now every day became a series of “I almost outed myself to my millions of crazy fans.” It could be worse. At least he sleeps with a cute and annoying twink every night.

[momo-de-avis]

tell me more about millais and the whole "steal ur wife and have a happy marriage with her lmaoo" and the whole pedo thing??? im intrigued

At the top of my head and very quickly without bothering myself with checking things online cause I’m a bit lazy sorry (though I’ve been over this story for quite a while, I trust my instinct)

When the Pre-Raphaelites appeared, they were the bad boys of London. Reasons:

1) Fucked around, mostly Rossetti

2) Broke academic rules by painting in excruciating and vivid details that weren’t possible with the naked eye (like Holman Hunt painted every single blade of the grass—your eye can’t see it unless you stare closely at it, so academically, that was ugly)

3) Used redheaded women as models. Now, Victorians were absolute fucking lunatics, but the ideal beauty to them was some corpse-looking Morticia Adams. Black hair and pale skin, was top notch. Blonde, blue-eyed beauty came second, probably. What mattered was the pale skin. It was a trend among Victorian women to paint purple and blue veins to look as dead as possible because the frailty of women in a society that told they literally were good for nothing except breeding was the Latest Trend. Redheads, however, were considered cursed. Case in point: the greatest pre-raphaelite muse, Lizzie Siddal: she was not only a red-head, but her skin was also darker than most prefered. Not that she was anything but a white woman, just not white enough to look like you were already flirting with tuberculosis and ready to die fashionably at 40 (though Lizzie was famous for being constantly sick and bedridden. And addicted to Laudanum, like a good Victorian).

4) Basically what gave them the name: PRE-raphaelite. To explain quickly: academic painting privileged the art that resembled Raphael's paintings: harmonious, made of volumes through precise shadowing, mannerist in its style. Line and drawing prevailed above colour. This is linked to formalism so I’m just gonna wrap it up quickly: drawing was considered the intellectual form of art (because in the 16th century people were like ‘oh, astronomy is a science!’ and 'oh, mathematics is a science!’ and people were like, 'well shit, we gotta find a reason to call arts a science too’ and the Renaissance worked that out by explaining that drawing was basically a form of science. Take Da Vinci). The Pre-raphaelites said: fuck that noise, and privileged colour. They used techniques to brighten their paintings (like a layer of white paint applied to the canvas before they applied the preliminary drawing, which made the colours stand out, and then finished it off with wax varnish, which makes it glow. If you ever see a PR painting live, note just how vivid it is. It looks like it’s never gonna wear off, it’s incredible). So with this, they basically said the Royal Academy was a bunch of piss babies who knew jack shit about painting (the accusation of being dumbasses included).

5) …but to be that guy, you had to LIVE the life. So, if you privilege medieval thinking, lifestyle and theology, what you gotta do? BE that medieval knight Victorians thought were oh so Chivalric. Again, famously, Lizzie Siddal is known to be the bad girl of this revival: she refused to wear crinoline and whatever shit the Victorian ladies wore. She wore loose dresses, no corsets and overall dressed like the engravings on Tennyson’s Idylls of the King. She was actually lauded for her commitment like, even Ruskin at one point saw Rossetti as a piss baby rock star wannabe who never finished his shit, but this girl? She committed.

So you see, when these guys popped up, Victorians scowled. BADLY.

But they knew that, to conquer the hearts of promiscuous dandies and hypocritical high-society, laudanum-ridden, arsenic-eating uptight douches and douchesses, they had to get to the loins of one man: most important art critic of his time, single-handedly responsible for elevating William Turner to the True Genius of English Painting: John Ruskin.

Now, just WHO was John Ruskin?

First of all, this little shit was overtly religious. Protestant kind, so you know what you’re in for. This guy studied Turner back and forth, knew everything about him, wrote extensively of his genius and was responsible, as I said, to consecrate him to the memory of British sea painting. Except he purposefully left a bit out, one particular episode of Turner’s life that, to Ruskin’s mind, would ruin his reputation.

Turner was a freak. My man has ENDLESS erotic drawings that go from curious artist look into the Vagina from full-blown pre-victorian porn. And Ruskin kept it all locked away inside his drawer.

The thing was, Ruskin was brought up surrounded by art. This guy looked at Roman statues of women, with their perfectly waxed peepees and toned arms supporting perky breasts and DEAD ASS though this was what women looked like.

So he married Effie Gray, a woman in everything respectable, a prosperous marriage for the good ol’ Victorian lady and dude.

And for the next five years of their marriage proceeded to REFUSE to even touch her.

When the pre-raphaelites pop up, Ruskin attends their very first exhibition and writes them a glowing review. Immediately they go from nut-heads to pop stars. But among them all, it was clear that it was John Everett Millais who was the most talented. So Ruskin took him under his wing.

His first assignment was: paint my portrait. But the pre-raphaelites did something the British academics didn’t: to paint nature, they went outside and painting the motif by looking directly at it. And Ruskin, who praised this mode of making art, had in mind the precise spot he wanted to be painted on: a waterfal or some shit in Scotland, where he owned a cottage.

This cottage was not big. It was actually rather small—you know, in pretending-to-be-a-peasant-is-so-much-fun! victorian fashion. And what does this absolute buffoon does? He invites Millais and his wife Effie in to paint his portrait.

Now I want you to imagine this woman, who has been pushing down 5 years of Horny, putting up with this dude’s shit, enclosed in a tight space with this man—who was older than herself—and incidentally, a handsome looking young fella who paints nicely.

I insist on this thing that Ruskin didn’t touch his wife because he thought women looked like statues because he actually told her. He told her he found her repulsive because—what do you know!!! The peepee’s got some pubic hair! And women menstruate! And like, we’re real fucking things, not Pygmalion's wet dream forged over and over again! She actually wrote a letter to her father detailing this (if you watch the show Desperate Romantics, the scene were Effie confesses this to Millais, the actress is actually reciting this letter word for word).

So when they return to London after the painting is done, they just… Fall in love. I mean, shit, what was she supposed to do?

The face of a man who doesn’t know he’s about to be shit-whipped by his pupil, painted by none other than his protegée, this same pupil.

But remember: no matter what Victorian fangirls say, and whatever that Victorian TV show tries to show you, this society was absolute utter shit for women. Effie Grey presented an annulment proposal to her marriage, and society collapsed on her. She was actually blamed for the fact that Ruskin wouldn’t consummate the marriage. And because she had grown quite close to Millais, she had to prove before the entirety of Victorian society that she was a virgin. Oh, yes. It’s what you’re thinking.

Those open-your-legs-wide-and-let-me-insert-this-not-at-all-friendly-looking-metal-utensil-up--your-private-canal-to-prove-you-are-a-virgin. This, mind you, was back then as utterly humiliating as it sounds now, and to make matters worse, Mr. I-only-fuck-clean-shaven-pussy claimed she was mentally unstable.

Either way: annulment conceded, and she married John Everett Millais. The two went on to a lifelong of fucking and 8 children. Check Millais’ painting Peace Concluded and tell me those two idiots did not die happy together.

I kid you not: until Millais’ death, Effie was socially ostracized. She was even barred from being present in social events where Queen Victoria was, proclaimed by the Queen herself (because remember kids! Victorian society absolutely sucked because it was none other than our favourite imperialist who made it so!) even after she ordered Millais the first Laureate painter. It was only when Millais was dying that in his death bed he BEGGED to lift that stupid shit and she conceded. I just honestly believe Effie didn’t give a shit at this point, because my girl was happy.

So, you ask, what happened to Ruskin?

Don’t think he got off easy lmao. He had his own demise. He wasn’t seen with good eyes after the whole annulment debacle. But of course, being the pissy adult he was, he had to make things worse.

Enter Rose de La Touche.

You see, Rose de la Touche was Ruskin’s pupil. She is, as far as we can tell from his writings, the only woman he ever called attractive and revealed to be attracted to her. When, you ask?

When she was fucking 9 years old, the first time he met her.

He became tutoring her when she was 14. At this point, this ugly ass vulture was way past his 40s. Rose’s parents actually made it worse if my mind doesn’t fail me, but I’m not certain so I won’t address them. Either way, he pretty much groomed her and she grew infatuated with him. He actually made plans to marry her once she turned like, 18 or something, like a good pedo.

The only reason Rose didn’t marry Ruskin? Effie Gray stepped in. Not that she was that interested in what was to happen. The thing was, the reason for the annulment was that Ruskin was impotent, and if he fucked a healthy girl and she got pregnant, she’d be in the shits. But either way, I think it was easy given that he was like 40 years older or some shit. Rose actually declined to marry because she wanted the marriage to be unconsummated, but this time around, ya big Pedo declined! I wonder why was it so easy the first time, and so hard now that he found himself a neat little child to corrupt, right?

At some point, even fucking Rossetti intervened. Now, Rossetti was the rock star of his time: he fucked everything that moved, he got into affairs with the wives of his pupils while Lizzie lingered between life and death at his home, and it took him some 9 years to finally keep his promise to Lizzie and marry her ass. He was the last person you’d expect to say a thing. But you know you’ve fucked up and that you’re a perverted piece of shit when THIS IS THE GUY who steps in to say 'hey, Ruskin, big fan, but you really gotta tone it down cause even I’m not a pedo, pal’.

Now listen: yeah, there’s a lot of speculation about Ruskin’s 'love affair’ with Rose de La Touche. Did he really fall in love with her when she was 9? We don’t know. We don’t care either, because it doesn’t make him any less a fucking pedo. Like, yeah, good art critic, nice theory on the whole Modern Painting book, but this dude had some serious issues.

And there you go

[jbuffyangel]

Weekly Rundown 10/21/18-10/26/18

Time to rundown what I’m watching, loving, hating and everything in between! Spoilers ahead! Full episode reviews and reactions are linked in the titles.

Daredevil Season 3

Just so y’all know - most nuns do not wear their habits in public anymore. It’s been that way since Vatican II, but TV refuses to catch up.

The action is amaaaaazing again. I love how Matt actually gets tired when he’s fighting.

I don’t want Matt to put that ugly Daredevil suit on again he looks ridiculous. Keep the black mask and call it a day.

I want Foggy to propose very badly. I need a Foggy wedding in Season 4.

Is there any particular reason why Karen didn’t haul ass to Frank’s Punisher lair when her life was in danger and Matty Mcbrown eyes was off Daredeviling an existential crisis? That’s where I’d go.

Matt refusing to ask the other Defenders help because “it’s not their fight” is the stupidest reason ever.

Arrow (“The Longbow Hunters”)

It is a bit creepy when Stan says, “I bet a guy like that would do anything to keep his family safe.” Maybe Stan is a nuthouse, but leave me to my dream for now.

Is it me or did Yorke look older than 40? 1978????

Deputy Director Bell is evil. Calling it now.

The Longbow Hunters don’t actually use bows. This is a twist I did not see coming.

Bl*ck S*ren can’t lawyer worth a damn, but she can wear a suit.

“Stay behind me.” That was oddly hot Rene. I’m wildly uncomfortable that I find you attractive right now, but it is what it is.

Rene: Been back in town a week and you’re already sneaking out of A.R.G.U.S. behind Papa Dig’s back? I’m so proud.

Felicity: Thanks man.

This whole exchange was delightful and not remotely derogatory like “Blondie.” THY NAME IS CHARACTER GROWTH.

“Grab your balls Curtis, we’re going in.” If the Rene character only exists to say this one line of dialogue then it was worth it.

Why didn’t BS and Dinah go after the Longbow Hunter? What is up with allowing all these criminals to run away at a moderately brisk pace and our people acting like they can’t catch them? They are called legs! Move your ass!  

BITCH YOU BETTER NOT STEP ON THAT PHOTO!!!!!!!

Legends of Tomorrow  (“The Virgin Gary”)

Legends Season 4 premiere is fantastic and full of all the hi-jinks I’ve missed over hiatus.

“Speaking of the same old crap isn’t that what he did last year?”Legends gets points for acknowledging that Wally gets the storyline shaft a lot.

When you are officially a hero the time bureau gives you a medal, but I was more excited about the balloons.

It would be super weird if the Legends spent more than a day in 2018.

Remember when Oliver asked Sara to move in with him and she went running screaming in the other direction? It all worked out because Sara knew he was really in love with Felicity. I’m just saying she’s come a looooong way.

I want to be clear about one thing and it’s not up for debate. Ready? The best thing about Legends is Mick. It’s always Mick. That is all.

OMG NATE’S FATHER IS BIFF FROM BACK TO THE FUTURE?????!!!!!!!! THIS IS SPECTACULAR CASTING!!!

Manifest “Connecting Flights”

It was nice to fill in the back story of the characters left behind after the plane went missing, however the show is starting to lose my attention. I need more movement on these character relationships. Manifest is hitting a lot of the same notes week after week.

This Is Us (“Toby”)

Randall is going ahead with the city council job? Are they independently wealthy Does no one have to work?

Baby Toby is the cutest.

Holy crap is this how in vitro really works? It’s so friggin expensive and no guarantees. Wow, my sympathies to all those who have gone through this excruciating process.

Randall unbuttoning his shirt is all the reason I need to vote for him. Done deal. 

Toby used his wonderful sense of humor to cheer up his depressed Mom. Ugh my heart.

But for real though sometimes you need just “one damn day.” #MomLife

Three hours to get ready Kate? Just as an FYI - that’s all over when you have a baby. You’ll be lucky to get a shower.

Miguel carried a piano up stairs to cheer Rebecca up. That’s love.

“There’s so much of her in you it scares me.” THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU SAY TO YOUR CHILD ASSHOLE.

A+ on the prom dresses. Absolutely what I wore in high school. We were fashionista slaves in the late nineties.

Kate’s impression of Adele is dead on.

Miguel tries so hard. He’s just trying to keep his promise to Jack.

Rebecca is such an amazing mom. Kate doesn’t give her nearly enough credit.

KATE IS PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Rookie (Pilot” and “Crash Course”)

I really loved The Rookie. I typically don’t hate procedurals, but this one has surprised me thus far. It’s fast paced, so it held my attention more. I hope it stays that way. 

I love how it is the rookies versus the training officers. It fills my Rookie Blue void.

I am not invested in any ships yet. I am not buying the romance between Nolan and Lucy so far. I actually think Lucy has more chemistry with Bradford and Nolan with the Captain.

A Million Little Things (“Friday Night Dinner” and “The Game of Your Life”)

I want to love this show, but they are making it next to impossible. I hate cheating storylines in any show. It’s one of the main reasons I quit watching Shonda Rhimes’ shows because she is unable to write one without including adultery. Arrow’s original love story revolved around cheating and was an absolute mess. It feels like a lazy way to inject drama. This cheating storyline between Eddie and Delilah is making two characters who are otherwise very likable extremely unlikable. 

Instead of jettisoning this plot into the atmosphere where it belongs and never speaking of it again, A Million Little Things is double down on it.  Delilah is pregnant! Oh wonderful, now we get to play “Who’s the Daddy?” for several weeks.

Apparently, the writers come from The Fl*sh school of writing. Characters can only be mad at other characters for one episode. All the friends found out about Eddie and Delilah’s affair and the very next week they are sitting down to pizza. It’s at Delilah’s house and Eddie’s wife Katherine comes too because FRIENDS. No. Just no.

Instead of being angry at Eddie and Delilah, the friends make excuses for them. Regina’s conversation with Delilah turned into a huge “I didn’t see your pain” apology, which is flat out ridiculous. What Delilah did was so off the charts wrong there is no excuse for it. If you are in pain see a therapist. It’s not an excuse to cheat on your husband. Also, Regina you are not to blame for Delilah lying to everyone for over two years. 

Gary, who has been the angriest, decides he’s being too hard on Eddie (ya know by actually holding him accountable for his actions) and lets Eddie move in with him after his wife finally kicked him out. Are you freaking kidding me with this? I was already mildly irked at Gary for giving Delilah a free pass, but I understood his reasoning because her husband just jumped off a building. She has been punished quite a lot. But Eddie? I think we could muster a couple episodes of anger towards Eddie.

The writers attempted drum up sympathy for Delilah by shining a little light on her seemingly perfect marriage with Jon. It’s not really perfect, but what marriage is? Jon was short with Delilah during a family dinner. He took a phone call from work and snapped, “Everything I do is for this family.” What a bastard. Of course, that is reason enough for Delilah to jump into bed with Eddie, her husband’s best friend. GIVE. ME. A. FRIGGIN. BREAK. If my husband slept with someone else every time I was cranky with him, he’d have a harem.

So, on top of being suicide apologists, the writers are adding cheating apologists. There is no reason to cheat. It’s just mean. Nobody has put a gun to your head. If you want out of your marriage you march to an attorney’s office and file for divorce. Not sure if you want a divorce? Then go to counseling. But cheating, under any circumstances, is wrong. It’s cruel and selfish. It’s trying to have your cake and eat it too. A Million Little Things trying to excuse away Eddie and Delilah’s heinous behavior is almost as bad as the cheating itself. Trying to make suicide and cheating okay with excuses is dangerous behavior. I AM NOT A FAN.

Stray Thought - on what planet is a school program presented in the middle of the freaking day? What kind of ridiculous school do Eddie and Katherine send their son to?

Blindspot (“The Quantico Affair”) 

Zapata has a very interesting running stride. Sorry I was in cross country. That stuff interests me

Roman saying "He knows. This is it. Kill him" underscores the dramatic tension.

I’m gonna need someone on Team Blindspot to pick up on Remi's side eye. Y'all are FBI agents for goodness sake.

I don't actually know what Patterson's name is, but I feel confident it is not Lisa.

I think Martin Gero saw me write "Where is Patterson's storyline?" in my last review. I could have opted for patience, but complaining loudly via written word felt like a better plan. 

Hey watch the condemnation Remi aka Jane aka double secret agent who told so many lies I can't keep it straight anymore.

OMG Rich not explaining how the tattoo was solved is the best thing ever. PLEASE DO THIS EVERY WEEK

I wanna talk about the Book of Secrets mostly because Rich calls it the Book of Secrets.

Hahaha. Her one night stand showed up at work. This is how Meredith and McDreamy began. I highly recommend elevator scenes too.

One night stand boy is Weitz's nephew. IT. JUST. GOT. BETTER

Sure Madeline come on in and check out our super secret tattoo murder board.

"Thundercats ho!" OMG was that an ad lib?

Totally ship Patterson and this dude. I should probably learn his name.

Somebody tell Rich about the one night stand. Pleeeeeeeease.

I'm not calling him Lincoln. He shall be known as "Slab of Man-Ham" forevermore.

Patterson and Rich are the perfect work wife/husband team. Remember Rich is the work wife

How does Weitz maintain employment? This may be the greatest of all Blindspot's mysteries.

Of course "Jane" and Weller are on the train Weitz. IT'S THEIR JOB. Seriously someone get this dude a DVD of #Blindspot S1-S3

Patterson girl, Jane is never that cranky with you when she's diffusing bombs. SOMEBODY NOTICE PERSONALITY CHANGES PLEASE!!!

"You're new here." ALL KNEEL TO PATTERSON.

[parachutingkitten]

Season 4 Analysis

STANDARD DISCLAIMER: I am going to be applying the concept of criticism to a TV show you presumably love and adore as much as I do. If you do not want your idea that the show is immaculate to be challenged, I would not advise reading past this point.

Mood for the season: It's a SuPeR fUn HaPpY pLaCe!!!!!

You don’t need to, but if you are interested, and haven’t seen my analysis of past seasons, you can find those here:

Pilot

Season 1

Season 2

Season 3

Hey guys! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Season 4! We are here! I am SO biased with this season. It has problems man. It has ALL the problems! ALL the plot holes! ALL the stupid, stupid stuff, but I LOVE ALL OF IT! okay, let's back up. I'm about to drop some context on you. 

So, when you're a military brat you tend to make friends with whoever you can, and when I lived in Germany I had a friend who was fandom OBSESSED. She, at the time, was super into Homestuck, something I managed to avoid being sucked into, though I do know more about it than I would like. Anyway, this was the point at which I started getting sucked into Ninjago. So, I figured that if I could trust anyone with a strange obsession, it was her. I showed her the last episode of season 3, and she decided she was just going to dive head first into it with me. We watched season 4 together as it came out, we talked about it, had a bunch of inside jokes about it, I wrote some very short fanfiction about it, she made some OCs, one in particular that I remember was Stormy, a ditzy cloud master who wore pink, we shipped him with... one of my OCs, I don't remember. She hadn't watched the first two seasons, so I had to fill her in on a lot, but she was the first person I ever fandomed with, and it was over season 4. So I guess you could say season 3 was the grand beginning of my love for this show, and season 4 was the peak of my fangirl experience (at least for that phase of my life).

Plot

This season is a real mixed bag. Coming off the heels of the first season, nothing makes sense. Suddenly there are more elements, completely discrediting Lloyd's supposed power of four powers. And now it's genetic, which brings up the problem of Jay, who... if either Ed or Edna were masters, they would have slipped by now (but also like, how cool would it be if Edna just busted out with lightning powers) and then Zane who... doesn't have genes. It makes the world bigger, yes, but it also discredits the lore of the last two seasons, and brings up the question "Where the hell were the rest of the EMs when the Great Devour attacked? Or the stone warriors? Or the final battle?!" Anyway, it's a bit jarring and sudden to say the least. It definitely was not planned beforehand. There aren't even any hints in season 3. Like wouldn't it be cool if in season 3 we saw them go to the noodle shop, or Wu was really vague about elemental questions. It would make a lot more sense then. Idk. It opens the universe up to the plotlines of most of the future seasons, but it does sort of discredit the first two. This season is also kinda choppy feeling wise. You go from the mood the past season have had in the first episode to this sort of native tribal feel on the island, and then the factory and then back to Ninjago. It's kinda a mess. Overall it was just an excuse to put these characters in cool situations (which I have done before, I understand). Which I get, and it makes for some cool stuff, but I don't think any of it ends up meshing together super well in the end. When I think of this season I think of the tournament. I forget about the whole snake stuff at the end most of the time. I forget about the while Garmadon conflict. The fact that I forget that's there has to be a bad sign, right?

Characters

Character work this season is really pretty good for the most part! There are a lot of new characters. And they all are very distinct and fun, and even when two people you don't know especially well battle, you're still really invested. All of the Cole and Jay stuff is pretty good this season! Major upgrade from season 3. The whole fight scene is absolutely fantastic. Garmadon is freaking awesome this season. He keeps on trying to kill himself, and it's stupid, and the show sort of acknowledges that it's stupid, cuz Lloyd is just like 'dude, what the heck'. Kai's arch this season is pretty good, exploring his darker side and putting that intense conflict in front of him was good. I can tell you one thing, I like it a heck of a lot better than season 7, but we'll get to that when we get to that. So, yeah. Overall improvement in character! It doesn't dive super deep or anything, but it all works and is all interesting.

Skylor

So... she is one of the reasons I call this season the fanfiction season. We have a whole bunch of other elemental masters we've never heard of, and one of them their power is... all the powers. I can not tell you how much this ticked me off! And she hardly ever uses them! She has pretty much infinite power, and she doesn't think to use it, pretty much ever! There are no restrictions on her! This is what I hate Skylor for. And I do mean hate. BUT aside from that, strictly character wise she is done pretty well. She feels pretty fake and overly sassy at the beginning of the season, but there's a reason for that. It's an act. But it's not like she changed her personality to fool him, she intensified her personality to cover her intentions. Her arch feels pretty natural. That one scene where she does the evil laugh... that was weird. But aside from that, it feels okay. She was raised to think that lying and cheating is the norm, so when someone presents her with another option she begins to change. It makes sense. I love the scene where Kai and her look at each other through the prison bars and (even though their freaking legos) you can feel her realization that she's ashamed of what she's doing now. And after she makes the transition, she's just really chill. Like, I would like to hang out with her. I guess it is kinda sweet that even though she had all of the powers of... ever, at the end she's happy to just run her noodle shop. It's kinda poetic. Anyway, she may be a bit overpowered, and she feels like a bit of a Mary Sue, but overall her personality and interactions are enjoyable enough for me to mostly ignore that. I do agree that she is best used in moderation. She doesn't need to be part of the team. I wish we had a quick cameo each season, but whatever. What we have now in season 9 is nice, but she definitely needs to step back out of the spotlight in future seasons (knock on wood) in order to remain as likable as she's been.

Karlof

Love him. Freaking love him. Honestly, I probably relate to him the most. He's the first loser of the tournament, he avoids trouble, he sticks to what he knows, and he says it like it is. I love his interactions with everyone down in the noodle factory. He's like this perfect blend of optimism and pessimism. His interactions with Cole are beautiful. Their chemistry is really great. One of, I think everyone's favorite masters, and there's a reason why.

Shade

So... typical darkness character. Obviously selfish. But once the climax hits, I actually like him a lot. He kinda serves as an antagonist at first and then flips. It's kinda cool seeing a character with moral boundaries that far out. He's purposely suspicious to take attention away from Skylor, which I get. I think he has a lot of missed potential, but nonetheless, a decent character.

Neuro

I absolutely love his power! I love his manor, I love his voice. He may well be my favorite EM. I don't even know what else to say about this guy. If Karlof is who I am, Neuro is who I'd like to think I am. Calculated, calm, reasonable, and much like Karlof again, not too risky. I like him a lot. Cool guy. I like seeing how far he's willing to go for the ninja, and where certain lines are for him. It's kinda cool to watch. He could use a friend though. I HC he and Paleman hang out. Both quiet. Both reserved. Neuro could probably locate him in a room even if he's not visible. Idk. Anyway, I like him a lot! Great character.

Griffin Turner

Classic speedster. Good enough. Not much to say. He's fun. He's cool. He's what you'd expect. Decent screen time. None of it particularly character developing. For what he is, he's good at it.

Jacob

So, let's ignore the part where they made us think he was dead. He's a lot of fun. Good for them getting a blind character in there. Still confused on what his powers can... do? But I like his spunk. I think we all have a little soft spot for him.

Chamille

One of the only girls and she's pretty much evil. Why do girls have to be evil at one point to be interesting? Idk. Don't really care for her, don't really think much about her. Whatever. She's there. She serves her purpose. Fine. Okay. Moving on.

Paleman

Friggin love him. For the master of light to be invisible is a great move, and pretty creative. His voice is kinda obvious, but very distinct. It's a creative background character to have. I like him a lot. Again, I feel he could use some more love. See above Neuro HC. Like him a lot and... yay.

Bolobo

Kinda missed the "mother nature" pun... could have had at least one more female master... that's okay. He's cool enough. Kinda disappointing though. I mean, vines? Is that it?

Gravis

Gravity is a dang cool power. Idk what else to say. He doesn't get a ton of screen time, so it's hard to praise him too much, but yeah. I really like that. Actually had an FC (she was a villain but you know whateves) with the power, so seeing that be a real element they used is really cool.

Ash

I don't like him. He's very strange. He's just got that one laugh. He seems comically over the top a jerk. I like the way his mouth looks though. Unique and kinda cool. I was looking on his Wiki page, and it said he and Chamille kissed in the background at one point? Is that true? I am way curious now

Tox

Okay. She's nonexistent here, no personality. I guess she's kinda tough. Yeah, this gets confirmed later in season 9, when she speaks. But even there she's pretty nonexistent. Here's my idea. Instead of having all your females being 'tough' why not flip expectation on its head? I think it would be way funny and clever if the master of poison was super friendly, and bubbly, and genuinely a nice person. I'm thinking almost like Jay's (lightning... or I guess adopted) mom, levels of talkative and nice. Wouldn't that be kinda fun? Idk. Whatever. It is what it is.

Kapau and Chope

Best villains ever 10/10. 'Nuff said.

Romance

KAILOR

Okay, I freaking love them! They're not my favorite couple or anything, but they work really, really well… under certain conditions. There are a few bumps I can't ignore. Can we have a protagonist in the show who doesn't send googly eyes at their future love interest the first moment they see her? And remember when they made us think Kai and Skylor were related... yeah... why did we need to do that? That was... kinda uncomfortable. BUT other than that, Skylor is exactly what Kai needed. First, he needed a redhead. Duh. Second, he needed someone who would see right through his Kai shmoltz and be real with him. Third, she had to be fun. And finally, she needed to wear the pants in the relationship. And Skylor fills ALL of those requirements! I like that Kai falls for her right away, and I love that she doesn't think she likes him until... she totally does and it's like 'Oh SNAP!'. I love that weird scene where Chen walks around with Kai like he's already his son in law, that cracks me up! I guess I like them more in theory than in practice. It feels a touch forced, and it needed a bit more time. Point being, the beginnings of the relationship are extremely awkward and strange, but towards the end of the season, it gets good! I just wish we could see more :)

The... love... triangle

Alright, by now, you guys should know how I feel about these things. They suck. They're stupid. I hate them. They're pointless. And this season is... quite possibly the stupidest. So... the whole Garma-Wu-Sako... thing this season is that Wu wrote a letter to Misako a long time ago, and Garmadon stole it, and then... Misako *groan* used it to determine which of them she was going to marry... okay. Yeah, Garmadon, that was a crap thing to do. But you know what, he was evil. Wu should have just signed the thing when he wrote it. But also, Misako... WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' GIRL?! Why... would you let a letter... be the final deciding point? I don't get that. And my main problem is that she basically chose her husband based on his writing ability. The thoughts Wu had in the letter obviously directly express what Garmadon wanted to say. In the end, his feelings for her were still the same. The only thing different is that he didn't write it. He's not good with words the way Wu is. But the show treats it like he lied about his feelings, and didn't even like her. Like he was using her for personal gain or manipulation or something. Idk. The whole thing makes no sense. Now, maybe if he did something to make Wu directly look bad or disingenuous THAT would be understandable. But... idk. I don't get it. Misako sucks. Let's move on.

Villians

Chen

Chen is my favorite villain. Hands down. No competition. Any way you slice it. I friggin love the heck out of this dude. And here's why. First off, he's a very comedic villain that still remains extremely threatening, which is an extremely thin line to walk. I mean, think about it. With all the other villains, they were intimidating, and the henchmen provided the humor. Here, I guess you could say they flipped it cuz Clouse is pretty intimidating, but Chen is still crazy scary on his own. And here's how they do it: He's insane. Straight up, he has lost his mind. Nothing he does makes sense, but that's fine, cuz it probably makes total sense to him. You can laugh at the quirky things he does, but also live in fear knowing that he has trap doors installed EVERYWHERE. Why? Cuz he likes them! Is there a better reason than that when you're crazy! That was my problem with people with Pythor. He is so smart, why didn't he ever think that the devourer might eat him too?! There is no explanation. But with Chen, that doesn't matter! He wants to be a snake! Why? Why not?! No flaws in that thinking, right? This is also why I like Ultra Violet so much. She's the only one to rival his position, but because she's more of a side villain, I don't feel that's enough to dethrone him. With insane villains, you never have any idea what they're playing at, if it's smart, or how to counteract, cuz they're just insane. I mean, seriously,

"Chen, the ninja have figured out our plan, what should we do?"

"COOL! Let's tell EVERYONE our plan!"

And it works! I love his voice. Just the way he says things makes me so happy! He's having so much fun, and I have fun with him! 10/10 villain. Great work.

Clouse

I can't get past the voice. It sounds so over the top evil and... it's kinda annoying for me? He has a decent backstory and such, but whenever he's on screen I always find myself wishing it was Chen. He just sucks the fun out of everything and leaves nothing there, so most of his interactions aren't particularly interesting. I don't know. Never really thought much of him.

Humor

Needless to say everything with Chen works! Everything with the EMs works. Jay's whole Positive Thinking streak is amazing! There's not a lot that falls flat on its face. It's really pretty fantastic.

Favorite joke: too many to count. If I had to pick one...

Chen's: the reds, the purples, the super dark purples!

Drama

This season has some damn good drama. It has my personal most sad moment in all of Ninjago. I'm of course talking about Garmadon's death...  JK! XD I WAS LAUGHING ALL THE WAY THROUGH THAT SEQUENCE! But we’ll get to that later. Okay. But for real, my personal most heartbreaking moment is when we find out Pixal is scrapped (of course it's Pixal related) but seriously, watching this for the first time, it broke my heart hardcore. I audibly gasped. They have these conversations, and she realizes he doesn't remember her, and it hurts her because they were comPATABLE GOSH DANG IT! And then he starts remembering, and she knows she can't go with him, so she lies to him to give him the motivation to make it out, and then the reveal, and Zane's heart breaks, and your heart breaks. This whole scenario reminds me of my own writing, it has all these things I enjoy using. Distinctions between fantasy and reality, characters lying to each other to protect them, and an ending realization of total and complete emptiness. Of course, Pixal is added into his head, and all is fine and dandy. It works for this season but serves her worse in future seasons. Regardless, that moment when Pixal says 'scrapped' is the most depressing thing I've ever seen. All of the Zane drama this season works really well. Zane having an identity crisis is something I didn't think the show would handle. When Zane says he's just a clone if himself I was like 'oh, dang! They went there!'. It's almost like he's comparing himself to Cryptor, and it's some heavy stuff. Everything this season is shrouded in mystery. I love that. For the first half of the season or so, I really like the tournament stuff. But as we get Cole, and especially Jay in the noodle factory, that plotline gets much more interesting. I don't get into the Nya and Lloyd and Garmadon stuff that much. The stuff with Kai is okay. But overall, there's some good stuff.

Climax

Okay, so... I... I mean I like the build up. The thing with all the trucks is really good. Most of it was really pretty good with all the EMs doing stuff the ninja would usually do. But the whole ending thing, with getting mini Pythor involved, and you know. The whole Garmadon death thing. He died an honorable death and all that, but... idk, I can't get past Lloyd's voice. As he reads him off I just couldn't stop giggling! It's so overdramatic, they feel like they need to make Lloyd mad at his dad for whatever reason so he can come back at the last second, and it all feels so forced. And then the ending is super overly cheesy for how serious the show wants to take itself at that moment. Idk. I don't like it. One of my least favorite finales.

Spotlight episode

There are some good ones to choose from this season. Some real good ones. But the one I find myself watching the most is Ninja Roll. This episode doesn't have too high stakes, it doesn't make much sense, it's kind of pointless, but it perfectly encapsulates the reason I watch Ninjago. I don't know exactly why I watch Ninjago. I'm not into the action most of the time. The romance is cute, but not potent enough to warrant watching the show. The humor isn't revolutionary, the characters aren't especially deep. No, the reason I watch Ninjago is cuz it's fun. Ninjago is just a good time. It has just enough of all of those aspects to make for something I love. It makes me smile. With seasons 8, and especially 9, Ninjago has shifted into this darker action based, lore-driven thing, which I thought I would like, and I do, but I think it's lost a bit of that fun factor. In my opinion, Ninjago is it's best when it's self-aware, and doesn't take itself overly seriously. When you don't have to end the season on an ominous dark cliffhanger. I mean really. What is this? Chima? No. I just want to go hang out with the ninja and the gang, whatever it is their doing. This episode takes advantage of every situation a roller derby with the ninja provides. Of course Jay roller skates with his mom. Of course, Kai is incompetent at it. Of course, Chen cheats, of course, it all comes down to Lloyd. Of course, there's freaking buggies that Chen releases! This whole episode makes me smile and laugh and it has a good message. This is what I miss about Ninjago, and that's why it's my spotlight.

Misc

I know everyone always teases Jay about his TV show, but what about Kai and his wrestling career? I just feel like that would come up more often

I completely subscribe to the theory that Pixal was scrapped to fix Zane cuz they beat him up so badly when capturing. I'd kinda like to think Pixal even volunteered herself for it... ONE SHOT IDEA

I have to scratch... my face.

I need a number on the trap door to button ratio on the island

This season has my favorite intro of any season. Mainly cuz the remix is FIRE and I hate the fact that they don't have an extended version that sounds more like the opening itself. 

So all together, the word to sum up season 4 is fun. Definitely not technically the best, or the smartest, or the most well done, but it's my favorite because of nostalgia, my inner child, and because it makes me smile. I love this season.

- Maya (Parachutingkitten)

[jessieleaf]

Right Kiddies, the De Rolo interaction continued

Here is the thing real quick about the people in the party going forward

Val was kidnapped at 7 and has a scar in her hand where the kidnapper stabbed it when she got annoying. She and her 3 Aasimar Brothers were also targeted when she was 12 by three necromancers. She made a pact with the Raven Queen in that moment to stall them long enough for help to arrive. Now Val is on a mission to serve her patron, become a hero, and return to teach her brothers to do the same. Except she is 16 and is in way over her head and has a lot of growing left to do.

Calladyne is a half elf bard who looks fab and sings like Beyoncé, but spent her life in a bad Fey court and has just returned from the Feywild and it’s only been, like, 3 months since she was technically born. Gal is 20

Dixie is a revenant out to kill the dragon that killed her home and family.

Aavar was tricked into wearing cursed armor that had a good ac, but the dude who gave it to her could make her do whatever he wanted her to do (and he was a dick) and she couldn’t take it off. He died and we recently got her armor off , which was a big in game victory.

Veir really likes guns. He thinks Dwarves should use guns as their main form of weaponry. He is butt-hurt that Percy doesn’t agree.

The player who controls Dixie had to leave early, so we were without a tank who...actually can’t really die. It was bad.

We find out that multiple people took the baby. We track some footprints back into Whitestone and to a warehouse. I break our stealth with a nat 1 and try to remedy it by going in first. 4 Rogues with sneak attack = pincushion Val.

We fight them off and eventually tie up two and interrogate the gal behind the whole thing, who happens to be the lady we met at dinner on the council who is in charge of the business and economy in Whitestone. She is Myriad. They handed the baby off to cultists.

We head back out again after some...intense interrogations. Percy pulls our Gunslinger aside to interrogate the woman and he nearly pulls an No Mercy Percy, smoke and all. It’s just a test tho to see if Veir was a good person or something and Veir is left along to interrogate this gal. Something awoke inside that dude because hell man, we was not very kind to that woman.

Percy gives Veir Animus as a loaner so he can better kill the f-ers that took the youngest De Rolo.

We head out, find an old hideout at the end of the tracks we are following in the woods, and make it through the hallway of spinning blades and smashing pillars set up as a death trap. Fun thing about that was if we got to the end, a rune on the door caused a fear effect and you ran back into the death trap.

We find the cultist and her crew with the baby. It’s a tough battle. Calladyne our Bard goes down a lot, and Aavar our arcane archer ends up getting hit by a spell that makes her see her worst fear. It wasn’t pleasant. Eventually the cultist lady takes a knife to the baby’s throat and Val is freaking out. She doesn’t know how healthy this woman is or if she will kill the baby as soon as anyone attacks. She risks it and gets the HDYWTDT with eldritch blast.

I catch the baby, Veir finishes off the remaining foe, and we questions her and her companions using my Tome ability my class provides (I can ask the dead 1 question). They were gonna use the baby for fuel apparently. We find that they are cultists if the Chained Oblivion, and a letter on the lady says

“We found another in Whitestone. Have it delivered to the Whithered.” Signed Thola.

Both names are from Val’s backstory. Both were two of the three necromancers that attempted to kidnap her.

So I’m cradling baby Vax, who has snuggled into my shoulder, staring in shock at this letter.

We end by returning baby Vax to a very grateful mother and father.

NEXT SESSION!

We all meet the next morning to De Breif the De Rolos (that is legit the session title. My DM was pretty proud)

Val basically info dumps her backstory to convey how dangerous the people are who took baby Vax. She gets really upset during this too and Vex reaches out to put her hand in mine and Val lets her know that she will do everything in her power to protect Vax from the necromancers. She accepts Val’s vow but says that they’ve got it handled for now and gives me the classic Vex smirk.

Also, turns out Baby Vax just has black wings that appeared recently, so Val is now for sure certain the RQ blessed them with the child instead of any other God.

So the De Rolos decide to help and Percy gets really excited. Like super excited.

Also Aavar snoops around for info in the evil council members house after being told not to and took a bunch of papers. Don’t know if she kept them or left them for the De Rolos but she and the councilwoman had relations through the Myriad, as Aavar was forced to work with them.

The next morning we are awoken by Percy, who is practically vibrating with excitement. He has a speedy way for getting us to Lyrengorn.

He made himself an airship.

Dude let us take it out on its maiden voyage.

The ship is pretty small, but the cabin is bigger in the inside and is heated. Dude just...got everything he wanted.

So we sail off to Bigby’s tower! With the eldest De Rolo kid Shaun as our captain.

Speed round

We discover that Dixie is basically Deadpool after she fails with a Nat one to climb down a rope in Lyrengorn. She has, in canon, a Canadian accent, duel wields swords, and reassembles herself like something out of a horror movie, with shit just snapping into place.

We find the tower and it’s like...super Trippy. Each door leads to another room, every step takes you to a different place with different gravity, one door took us to a giant mimic in a giant glass container that imitated sand. That was fun.

Also the steam Gollum we faced did 65 max damage in a round to level 6 players. That was stressful.

We finally find the study and the artifact we came to recover called Cepheus, the shroud of tears.

Funny thing is though, our dm made these items before we even sent our characters in and I just so happened to be a Raven Queen fangirl. He tells us that the list of coincidences and parallel story beats we somehow miraculously stumbled upon in our party is absolutely mind boggling.

Here is the item made the THE RAVEN QUEEN HERSELF BEFORE SHE ASCENDED.

Val takes the item in her hand and immediately feels a rush of power. She channels the energy apprehensively into her focus and suddenty sees the Raven Queen’s face. “Put it on.”

Val: “Yep ok im putting it on”

Val’s wings extend 15 ft in either direction, a cape made of shadow extends out from the clasp, and her hair goes all Eris from Sinbad.

So I got wings all the time now y’all (but just for the aesthetics, I still can’t fly unless I use my racial feat or turn into a raven)

We read Bigby’s journal and other artifacts we are looking for get mentioned. One of them is a bow (great for Aavar) that was lost in Pandamonium. Aavar makes a comment “I’m not gonna go carrying around a magical weapon that I’m going to get hunted for.”

I surprised myself with a very out of line quip from Val “I mean, you wore that armor and everything was fine” (implying that no one hunted her for that particular powerful magical item)

Everyone reacts shocked and very disturbed by the comment. Aavar walks away, stunned at the comment.

Never had Val been so powerful yet felt so powerless.

I love this game. I can’t wait for more drama. We all have plans for how to deal with that bombshell and are practically vibrating like Percy. We ended after exiting the tower. Things are gonna be real interesting as we travel to Vassilhiem. I’m so excited you guys.

If this was enjoyable for you, go ahead and let me know in the comments and I’ll set up an official tumblr where we will keep you updated about our travels through Tal’dorei.

[atypicalcreekdump]

Beachlife - A Creek Oneshot

Here we go, first one! Like I said, it’s pretty fluffy, so don’t expect any real problems here. :P Anyhow, have fun reading <3

~~~~~~

"GAH! No! Please Stop!", The anxious blonde boy screamed, as his boyfriend's fingers pushed down onto his back, gently caressing the pale skin while rubbing in a layer of white creme.

"Tweek, Honey, relax! It's just sun blocker! No reason to be tensed, alright? It's just me." Craig was as calm and balanced as usual, behaving in the exact opposite way as his boyfriend. Maybe it was because of this that he was so great, perhaps even the best at helping Tweek to relax, to live a life without totally freaking out every time only the slightest sight of a problem came up. Tweek always being like this was the hard part of their relationship; however, the easy part was that his behavior was predictable, so Craig knew exactly  what to do to make him stop - and it worked almost every time.

Tweek was lying on a blanket in the warm sand with his belly to the floor, presenting his back to his boyfriend who knelt right over him, lotioning his back with sun blocker.

And as he said these words while gently massaging Tweek's back and his shoulders, he swore that he could have determined the second in which Tweek started to relax; his muscles stopped to contract, his spasms almost completely disappeared for the moment, and his breathing came back to normal, perhaps even letting out a light sigh of relief, as he now was able to enjoy his boyfriend's soothing treatment.

Craig immediately began to grin. A grin of Victory, a grin proudly presenting himself as the winner over Tweek's anxiousness. In some way he was really happy and proud that he seemed to be the only one who was really capable of getting through to his boyfriend, to help him come down when there was no reason to be upset.

Tweek finally began to rest his forehead on his arms, closing his eyes, obviously enjoying the soothing situation Craig had created for him.

Craig was still kneeling over Tweek, his body between his legs so he was able to reach every part of his back without much effort. Both of them, of course, wore nothing but their bathers, Tweek's being a brown one and Craig's being white with blue stripes. Craig didn't even wear his hat in public, the first time for ages, but he surely would have died of overheating if he did as it was almost a hundred degrees out here in California during Summer. But in exchange for his hat, he wore some pretty cool sunglasses, just like pilots used to wear that he bought the other day.

After rubbing his boyfriend's back for quite some time, he decided to stop, not without leaning forward and pecking a few quick kisses on his neck however, causing a few more cute little groans from Tweek. Craig was grinning again, Tweek has gotten really into this...

But then he stood up, instantly causing Tweek to raise his head, looking at him, half concerned, half angry, that he stopped what he was doing. "Hey, what you think you're doing?!"

Craig grinned while he laid down next to his boyfriend. "Relax, dude, there's more where that came from. Mkay?" Yeah, Tweek could become pretty horny pretty quickly once he got into it. At that point in time it could actually be hard to stop him. Good thing he hadn't reached that point yet...

"Hrmpf, alright", he gruntet as he put his head back at its previous Position. Craig, smirking for about the last few minutes, also laid down, next to Tweek, closed his eyes and enjoyed the warmth, the sun and the sound of the sea.

A few hours later

It was early evening, around Sunset, as they roamed some of the bigger streets, browsing the gift shops for nice souvenirs to bring back home. The general atmosphere was amazing, the setting sun colored the streets in a deep shade of orange, it was amazingly quiet all around and most tourists had already gone. They were practically alone as they roamed the streets, holding hands, their fingers linked together, like they always walked in public.

Also it was still pretty warm, they wore nothing but the bathing trunks they already had at the beach, regular old Polo-shirts, and some flip-flops on their feet. In want of enough sun to justify wearing sunglasses at Sunset, Craig had his pilote glasses folded into his neckline.

After looking through ugly Souvenir stuff for a while, they suddenly stopped at a display case, carefully inspecting two complementary necklaces depicting the famous yin and yang symbol.

"What do you think of those, Tweekers?", Craig asked while gently squeezing the blonde's hand.

Tweek nodded while smiling happily at the idea to share something this special with the boy he loves. "I like them."

Craig suddenly nodded, too. "Yeah, me too. and it doesn't look gay either. I like that.", He said without the hint of an emotion in his voice. They had never liked to be called "gay", even though they've been dating for about 7 years now. None of them would say about themselves to be super gay, to check out other boys or dreaming about Justin Bieber or other lame Superstars, but they both were sure that the path they chose was the right one. Maybe because it had already become some kind of habit, so they just kept sticking to each other. And maybe because it was true love? They couldn't be sure although it really felt like true love every time they looked into each other's eyes. Craig used to come up with his theory that, in fact, he wasn't gay, but, as he liked to put it, "Tweekophile". Even though there were some clues, his theory never got confirmed, so he decided to drop it after some time. Ultimately, he didn't care what other people called him, he loved Tweek, and that was all that mattered to him.

After buying the necklaces and wandering the streets for quite some time, they took a cab to bring them back to their hotel at about 1AM. After all, they had left about fourteen hours ago, feeling pretty exhausted at that particular point in time. Craig had problems to keep his eyes open while sitting in the back seat of the cab; It was already too late for Tweek, he fell asleep exactly the moment they entered the car and sat down. His sleepy head rested on his boyfriend's shoulder, digging his face quite deep into the crook of his neck while clinging his hands to Craig's shirt. Craig couldn't help but smile at the sight of his boyfriend's clingy position and how peacefully he had cuddled into his side. This was just perfect. This was how it was supposed to feel, right?

He also leaned his head against Tweek's, gently kissing his forehead once or twice while running his fingers through the blond hair, carefully playing with it.

"Tweek? I love you, you know that?", he whispered. He knew Tweek was asleep so he didn't really know why he said that.

"Hrm" Not more than a sleeping noise. "Iloveyoutoo". Craig wasn't sure if Tweek was kinda awake and realized what he said, or if it was just some kind of reflex, but he smiled and appreciated it either way.

Even though it didn't even matter as they reached their hotel about two minutes later. "Tweek? Honey?", He whispered into his ear, gently shaking him in order to bring him back to consciousness. The blonde in his arms began a bit to shiver, slowly opening his eyes, looking at his boyfriend with his sleepy, coffee brown eyes. "We're back home!"

Still half asleep and without any effort to move away from Craig, he just yawned and asked "Wha-what, in Colorado?", causing Craig to smile. "Not in Colorado, you dumbass, back at our hotel. Now come on, you can go back to sleep at our room."

He somehow managed to pay the driver and to get him and Tweek out of the car without totally pissing him off.

As they got back to their room, Craig quickly sat down onto his bed, checking his Phone, while Tweek went to the bathroom to brush his teeth before finally going to sleep. As an idea popped to his head, he turned himself around to face Craig in their room. "Craig?"

But the only thing he saw was his now sleeping boyfriend's body, haphazardly spreading out his body parts all over their bed, leaving almost no space for Tweek. He couldn't help but grin at this sight, so he put down his tooth brush, entered their room and watched sleeping Craig carefully before kissing his forehead, pushing him back gently so he could lay down next to him, quickly grabbed Craig's arm and wrapped it around his own waist while pushing his back against Craig, causing them to spoon, which Craig acknowledged with a sleepy sigh. "Goodnight, honey.", Tweek whispered, falling to sleep eventually.

[the-sevensins]

Starry Eyed; Chapter 1/Min Yoongi

Summary: Y/L/N Y/N is progressing through her final year of college. As part of her final grade and work placement grade her college offer a paid internship at a record label of their choice. When Y/N works here shes met with the harsh world of the music industry, hate, friendship, money and love. What will fate plan out for our starry eyed student?

Hey guys! This story has no exact number of chapters in mind. I know how this will end up to be but as of right now it’s just going with the flow. Requests are open. 

Warning(s): Angst, Fluff, Cursing                                                                       

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader                                                              

Type of AU: College!Reader, Producer/Artist!Yoongi

Word Count: Approx. 2758

MASTERLIST

Just for reference the song that Y/N performed is Navajo by Masego and the song that Nari sang was Erykah Badu’s remix of Hotline Bling Cell U Lar Device

Was it possible for someone’s eyes to look so bright at the sound of music? Their eyes shining as they looked as music software through the harsh lights of the monitor. It was as if she was part of the computer, her eyes trained over every single pixel of the screen, following the music play along, making touches here and there. This was her dream, she was almost there, all most at her peak.

Her professor watched her intently as her head moved slightly to the beat of the music. Every flick of a switch or push of a button had the crowd of student gushing with talk. The change of the beat, the spin of the turntable it was all noted. Her gentle voice boomed through the speakers. She felt alive. This live performance wasn’t anything any of the music professors had seen. Usually, for live exams, students would pre-record a song and create a new mix using it to be careful not to mess it up but Y/N? She was brave. Just minuted beforehand, as she was setting up her station with the help of Hansol she carefully but confidently spoke into the mic and said: “I haven’t pre-recorded anything, I’m making my song from scratch.” She shot a small, sweet smile towards the panellists and professors whose mouths had been left hanging open. The students in the crowd looked at her warily but had a quiet chatter among them.

A group of her friends, stood quietly a few feet away from her, watching her with proud eyes. They were certain she’d get this internship and if she didn’t get it they’d always pull a few strings and give her one at their own company. They eyed the three panellists that were from the company of the internship. Wearing black from head to toe, one was wearing glasses, the other two had hats to cover their eyes, they all wore face masks to conceal their identity. It was obvious who they were to Y/N and her friends. Having been friends with a group of idols and not knowing who their friends were, was a bit idiotic to them.

She could feel their gazes burning into her face, watching her every move. Her heart thumped along with the music but she had told her self to remain calm, to stay confident and she would get this. A smile had graced her face as the crowd began to yell words of encouragement and one student in particular who had started dancing. She almost threw her head back in laughter as more students began to dance along as she continued singing. Looking over at the culprit her best friend shot her a thumbs up and continued to dance.

‘Everything is going fine’ she thought to herself.  By the time the song was nearing to an end and the beat had begun to slow down, the whole crowd erupted in cheers, except for the other students who were partaking in the exam looked at her in bitterness and defeat. A triumphant look took over her face as she bowed and thanked the professors and panellists. Her friend

Nari pushed through the crown and fell into Minghao’s arms almost embarrassingly causing Y/N and Hansol to erupt in laughter.

“Dude, stop, it’s not funny! You too Hansol,” she whined as she punched both their arms and bowed towards the other boy whose ears had turned a bright pink.

“You did so well Y/N! You didn’t even tell me you were going to do it from complete scratch.” She pulled her friend into a tight hug and continued to babble on.

“I did you probably zoned out and started thinking about Ming-.” Y/N groaned once the initial sting of earning a slap to the mouth began.

“You better shut the fuck up, or I swear to god.” Y/N laughed as she began to gather her equipment from the tables and made her way to the seats, Nari hot on her tail. Their conversation went on for a couple more minutes before the head of the music department of Seoul National University tapped the mic to command silence. Y/N received a pat on the shoulder from Seungcheol.

“This is it Y/N, I know it’s you.” She shot him a grateful smile and played with the frayed ends of her jeans.

“Can I have your attention, please? Thank you. Firstly I would just like to thank everyone that has joined us today. Whether you part of the music department or not we really do appreciate your efforts of being here and supporting us. Every year for 5 days our fourth year’s and master student’s we hold live exams which are broadcasted on our website and on our YouTube Channel. This week we’ve had 150 students take place in this exam and the student or students that get the highest points are offered a paid internship at a given music company. The companies that have decided to work with us are SM Entertainment, Pledis Entertainment, YG Entertainment, JYP Entertainment and BigHit Entertain-,” a loud gasp interrupted the professor and the whole crowd began to talk. Y/N fidgeted nervously and impatiently waiting for him to continue talking.

“Alright. Alright. Throughout these 5 days, major producers and artist from these companies have come to visit the live exams and they will help to give our judgement and pick our final 10. I would like to give a warm welcome to today’s panellists; BigHit’s PDogg, Supreme Boi, Slow Rabbit and Bang PD.” Everyone stood up, cheered and clapped as the professor introduced them. They bowed and greeted us for a short moment before the speech continued.

“I would also like to give a very big welcome to BigHit’s RM, Suga and J-Hope who had taken time out of their very busy schedules to come here.” The crowd erupted once again but even louder as the three boys removed their accessories and bowed towards us. Towards the back a girl fainted causing a few people to start smirking and giggling, Y/N and Nari included.

“Settle down, please. Thank you. I’d like to thank the BigHit producers, artists and staff members for being here. I know that your timetable must be hectic, it really is an honour. Now that we’ve got all of the good news out, let’s get to the bad news. If you don’t already know only 10 students will be selected for this program. Two students from each day. It will be a tough decision, every single student’s hard work has been and will be taken into consideration. So for that, we’d like to hold those thirty who had performed today for an extra thirty to forty-five minutes.”

“I swear to God, I might just pass out like that girl if we get to meet them,” Nari said, fanning her face earning a low whine from Hansol.

“You never acted like that when you met us.” He pouted when she rolled her eyes.

“Yeah because it’s you guys, why would a freakout.”

“Hansol, don’t worry. She hid in her room for the whole day before she met you guys. She was freaking out. 'Y/N my hair! Y/N make-up isn’t that nice! Do you think Minghao lik-.” Y/N groaned for the fourth time that day, holding her mouth again for the second time.

“Keep fucking talking I dare you.” Nari glared at her causing Hansol and Seungcheol to snicker.

“You know it’s out of love.” Y/N shot her elder a sweet smile, causing Nari to sigh in defeat.

“The final ten should be picked by next Monday. Do keep believing in yourself. Every single one of you is talented. I wish I was like you guys when I was in college. Anyway, enjoy the day! Study hard!” We all clapped for the professor as he walked off the podium and watched as the other years and other teachers piled out of the doors taking a few glances at the panellists.

“I’m going to go say hi to Namjoon, it’s been awhile,” Mingyu said, brushing his pants as he strolled down the stairs. The other’s followed shortly after him.

“Being friends with other idols must be freaking amazing.” Nari sighed as her trained over the thirteen boys that each did a man hug with the three Bangtan boys.

“Yeah, maybe. It must be kinda stressful because they’re all racing for the top but their all friends. I don’t know about you but I’d never talk to you again if it meant being number one.” Y/N giggled with Nari as they watch Joshua trip over a cable.

“Hey,” Nari took her hand and squeezed it slightly. “The both of us are at a race to the top and we’re still the best of friends. If they can do it so can we.” She laid her head on Y/N’s shoulder, the both of them watching intently with the other students.

“Hey, Y/N, Nari?” They both turned their heads behind them to see a group of other music students sitting behind them.

“What’s up? You guys did brilliantly by the way.” Nari said, sending them a soft smile but in return got a scowl.

“Why did you guys even partake in this exam let alone the whole course if you’re already friends who can basically bring you into the industry.” Y/N recognised the girl that spoke almost instantly. Y/N envied her but she was never bitter about it. Jae-Eun was always on top of her game. Always handed in assignments on time, produced songs left, right and centre had every staff member of SKY University on her side. Not to mention she worked a full-time job and also had the time to party and go out on dates, Y/N, however, struggled with her assignments, part-time job, producing music and never even laid a finger on the dating lifestyle ever since she began college. So she was surprised by a such a perfect girl to have such bitterness in her voice.

“I don’t need to rely on other people to make it far. I need to work hard on my own first. I do get help when I really need. Nari and I both do but we do work hard on our own.” Jae-Eun crossed her arms and scoffed.

“So you’re telling me you brought the Seventeen, one of the hottest Korean boy groups at the moment just for no reason?” She eyed Nari and Y/N once more before looking at her “posse” and laughed.

“Actually no, we came on our own accord to support both our friends but I guess you wouldn’t have thought of that, right?” Seungkwan raised his eyebrow at the shocked look on Jae-Eun’s face.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to come across as rude. I’m Jae-Eun nice to meet you.” Jae-Eun’s face turned hot and red with embarrassment. She was starstruck.  Y/N heard the snicker of Seungcheol behind them and smirked to herself.

“Seungkwan, nice to meet you too. Nari, Y/N? They want to meet you now.” The pair nodded at him and waved at the girl who now had her hand on her chest beating heavily.

“I don’t like her.” He said as he helped them gather their things, handing the heavy equipment to their staff members.

“Neither do I,” Nari replied. “She’s a bitch.”

“You can’t say that Ri,” Y/N pouted as she elbowed her.

“She is, dude and you can’t say you disagree because you’re always saying how jealous you are of how she can top her work and that’s she still a bitch.” Y/N shrugged in defeat.

“I guess but honestly she had no reason to come at us like that. We didn’t do anything.”

“Yeah but rightfully speaking you’ve had the best exam they’ve seen in a couple of years. I mean making a beat from scratch? And recording it live? They’ve never seen that before, you’ve basically confirmed your position.” Nari looked at her with a proud smile.

“You deserve it too. Come on, you fucking sampled Hotline Bling, a song that’s been dead for the past 2 years and made your own fucking lyrics. If you’re not guaranteed a place, I’m not taking it.” Seungkwan dropped his bag and gasped.

“Y/N you can’t say that.”

“I can because Nari would do that for me.” She smiled at her as they walked down the stairs.

“Safe to say that you guys are fucking nuts.”

Y/N twitched nervously before she walked into the meeting room where everyone was. Her friend and various other students said they were indescribably nice and you get an apparent picture, according to an almost sobbing Nari.

Y/N didn’t know what she had to say or do. She wondered if they were going to ask her questions or do God knows what but she was nervous. Extremely nervous to the point where she had to wipe her clammy hands off her jeans. She knew she’d have to shake hands with at least one person and what kind of impression would she give off if her hands were sweating. She tapped at her forehead vigorously with blotting paper to get rid of any sweat pushing through her make-up.

Y/N almost jumped out of her seat at the sound of her name, unsure if she should walk in straight away or wait maybe half a minute. It took one her classmates to push her towards the door, causing her to almost topple in. 'Great,’ she thought. 'Now they’ll think I’m clumsy.’

As the door swung open, she noticed that all of their staff members were dotted around the large room chatting among themselves. The music department reviewing files with the CEO of BigHit and some of the producers. The rest of the producers were either talking to the staff members or the three artists they had brought with them who say quite comfortably in their seats, letting the rotating chair’s spin playfully as they laughed among themselves.

Y/N let out a light cough to indicate her presence which she had deemed as too quiet but it had indeed gained the attention of the people gathered in the room and the exploded with applause. She bowed gratefully and stood awkwardly to the side of the door that was now shut. 'No escaping now. You’ll make it through.’

“Please Miss Y/L/N take a seat.” He motioned to now the only empty seat, next to J-Hope and next to his own seat. She sat down quietly and offered a small smile to the now beaming J-Hope.

“You’re exam was outstanding. We’ve never seen anything like it in years. It really was something else.”

“Thank you, Mr Chang, I did work really hard for this.” She gave him a grateful smile.

“We could tell. It was very well produced you didn’t skip any steps you did everything just like any producer would do. We could tell you worked hard to keep it up.” She nodded and looked at the desk where several files had been laid out in front of her.

“We obviously haven’t chosen anyone yet but we just want to let you know that you are in the top section of people we do want to select. Every single one of your assignments have been perfect. The songs you produce are very much liked by everyone here and of course, everyone here except anyone from SKY is taken aback by your talent.” Y/N felt the heat rush to her face as all the professors agreed with Mr Chang. Bang PD has pointed over at Suga who had his hand up to add something to the conversation.

“Just to ask was, what’s the song called?” He asked.

“Navajo, I’ll put it up on my Soundcloud soon.”

“I’m really intrigued by the lyrics. They seem really deep much like your other songs actually. You are very talented.” He explained as the heat rose to her face.

“Thank you.”

“I’d also like to say I listened to some of the other tracks you have up on SoundCloud, you’re rapping skills and singing skills are amazing,” RM said. “You have very unique style. You’ll go far.”

“Thank you again.”

“I listened to some of your songs also. Your lyrics are very simple but deep. It’s easy to understand what you’re trying to convey. I like your techniques, they’re really cool.” She thanked them again before being asked to get a picture with them. She thanked everyone and left, her shoulders dropping like one brick was lifted off her shoulders. She had fewer things to stress about now.

[lighteyed]

inevitable realizations ☼ peter parker

summary : peter’s always been a little bit in love with you, it just took a difficult night and warm, ever comforting words for him to come to the realization. intelligent he may be, but he’s a clueless teenage boy before anything else.

word count : 2.5k

   It was eleven o’clock at night and, as per usual, you were neglecting the sleep you desperately needed in order to finish up the notes on your assigned reading novel that were due in just a few short hours. You were never one to finish tasks, especially menial ones such as homework, in a timely fashion. This was just the tip of the iceberg. You briefly took off your glasses, rubbing your tired eyes that were now struggling to focus on the words in front of you properly. When you slipped them back over your nose, glancing up toward your bedroom window that lead out to the fire escape, you saw the familiar face of your best friend peering in through the glass in a way that was only slightly creepy. 

   Peter knocked rapidly on the glass, waving at you in the typical, hyperactive way that he always had about him. You jumped off your bed, reaching out to shut your bedroom door before walking over to the bay window and unlocking it. A rush of cold winter air nipped at your face the minute it swung open and Peter Parker shoved himself through. Visits from him in this particular manner were common, especially after a day’s work of fighting crime throughout various parts of New York, but not usually this late- and never without a text to alert you first.  

    “You must be freezing,” you shivered, closing the window quickly. “How long were you out there?” Making yourself comfortable on your bed once again, you propped open your book, ready to force him into helping you study. He didn’t answer. Instead, he drew his sweatshirt closer to his body, sliding to the floor beside your bed and leaning his head against the soft duvet. His curls were sticking up in every direction when he pulled his hood away, his cheeks and the tip of his nose a brilliant shade of red, but not from the bitter chill that was sweeping mercilessly over Queens. 

   You heard a distinct sniff, then another, then another. His breathing, already shallow from the frantic climbing he had done to reach your fire escape, became even more labored. He pulled his knees to his chest to hide his face. He felt you press yourself against him, your arms around his shoulders and across his chest before he could pull away in embarrassment. Your glasses creaked when they pushed too far into his shoulder. Neither of you moved. You clung to him and he sat there, silently shaking and leaning into your embrace as if it were the only thing keeping him from falling apart. 

   “Hey, hey, shh, shh, Peter, you’re okay,” you whispered, rubbing his back. “I’ve got you, I promise. You’ve gotta breathe, though, okay?” He was always ashamed of his sensitivity, but he couldn’t help it. He was a sensitive boy and he cried easily and had an awful lot of anxiety sometimes. Today was one of those days, with good reason. He nodded stiffly, maneuvering himself to hug you back, face pressed into your shoulder this time. 

   “It’s… the anniversary,” he said, his voice broken. “One year.” Hollow. “One year since- since Ben. One year tomorrow.” 

   He pulled away, wiping his nose on the sleeve of his oversized sweatshirt. There were traces of tears still making their way down his cheeks, sliding across his nose and down to his lips. He tried to rub them away, too, but you caught his wrist in your hand. 

   “You’re not wrong or less of a dude for crying, Peter.” The way you looked at him, so lovely and caring and worried, made his heart cry out for the safety of your embrace again. “Were you at the cemetery?” You matched his stance and rested the side of your cheek on your knee, still carefully studying his face. 

   “Yeah,” he exhaled, placing his chin in his palm. “I’m gonna go again in the morning with May. Gonna miss school. I- I probably should’ve, um, stayed with her tonight but I…” he trailed off, “I needed you.” He said it as he said most things to you, with his soft tone of voice and his hesitance that made him, him. He never really noticed until now. 

   “What are best friends for, right?”  

    “Yeah. Best friends.” 

    Ignoring the odd way those two words slipped out of his mouth, you said, “I’m sorry, Peter. I know you loved Uncle Ben so much. I’m sorry, you don’t deserve this. You and May don’t deserve this.” You reached out to him, your hand gripping his without an ounce of doubt. You had small hands and he didn’t but he felt a thousand times better when yours found his. “I’m always here for you. Do you wanna talk about it?” 

   Surprisingly, he shook his head adamantly. “No, no.” He squeezed your hand. “I kind of, um, just wanna go to bed. Crying like a little baby really tires a guy out, you know?” He gave a weak laugh, a tiny grin, and you smiled right back at him before pulling him to his feet. “Can I use the bathroom?” He needed to wash the sticky feeling of dry tears off his face, rub the sadness out of his eyes. He wanted to be strong for May when he got back in the morning. 

   “Of course, just be quiet. Mom and dad are asleep.” You padded across your rug and opened your door a crack, holding it in a specific way so that it wouldn’t creak when you let Peter through. He gave you a grateful squeeze of the hand again before disappearing into the bathroom. 

    He splashed water on his face, staring up at his reflection, at the water dripping off his eyelashes and the curling ends of the hair that was plastered to his forehead. He rubbed at his face and took a deep breath. He wasn’t going to cry anymore. You had sufficiently comforted him for the night. Peter could breathe again. 

   Peter quietly walked back down the hallway and into your bedroom, watching for a second as you pulled spare blankets down from a shelf in your closet and arranged them on your bay window. You had cleared your bed of your school supplies and had left the covers open for Peter to crawl into without a second though. Which he did. Your covers smelled quite lovely, actually. It was the scent of your perfume that you wore often enough for him to recognize the scent, and he wanted to fall asleep under the inviting covers that were laid out for him. Then, he saw you sit atop your window, about to lie down. 

   “Wait, why are you doing that?” He got out of bed and took your hand for the third time that night, growing accustomed to the feeling of it. He pulled you over to your bed. “You’re not sleeping on a stupid window. That’s ridiculous. I’ll take the window.” He spun you around and ignored the protestant noise you made, gripping your shoulders and sitting you down on the bed. 

   “I’m not letting you take the window, either!” You argued, yanking him back down on the bed. He huffed, glaring at you in a teasing manner. “C’mon, just take the bed. You need it more than I do.” His glare dropped to his lap, an idea rolling around in his head. “What?” 

   “Y/N, how about we just both take the bed?” He said finally, lifting his eyes back to yours. He wasn’t sure what made him say it, why he didn’t just take the floor like he probably should have, but the words were out there in the world and there wasn’t a way to take them back now. You bit your lip, then shrugged, scooting over. 

   “It is big enough for the two of us.” You turned away from him, turning off your lamp and getting under the covers. You heard Peter slide in next to you, but your back was toward him until he poked you sharply. “What’s wrong, Peter?” 

   “Can you- um, well-” 

   You flipped over on your side, just barely making out his face in the darkness of your room. “Do you want me to cuddle you?” Though you said in a teasing sort of tone, you were silently quite pleased when he mumbled a reluctant yes. You moved closer, one arm going around his waist and the other underneath him. Your head was on his chest, listening to the resilient beating of his heart. He placed his chin atop your head. He focused on the sound of your steady breaths until you were sleeping peacefully beside him. 

    He was so grateful for you- the person who stood by his side throughout anything and everything. You, so strong and beautiful and brave and comforting in his times of distress. You, who never seemed to waver in your loyalty to him. You, the very picture of loveliness and a girl who he’d very much like to- 

   His eyes flew open, and he almost jumped away from you. He didn’t want to risk you awakening, though, so he stayed put, freaking out internally rather than externally the way he was prone to doing. He had been thinking of kissing you. That was what he was going to say. Kiss. The thought had come so simply to his brain it was like he already thought the same thing for years. Maybe he had. It wasn’t like he was blind. You were a stunning girl, even if you didn’t think so yourself, you were his best friend, you were practically perfect and Peter would be an idiot to not adore you the way that he did. 

   Adore, adore, adore. Oh, boy. Peter glanced down at you, sleeping in his arms, and confirmed what he had so stupidly never noticed before. His infinitesimal, brief affection for Liz Allen had absolutely nothing on his all encompassing love for you. 

   Peter bid you goodbye that morning at six thirty sharp, before either of your parents had woken up for work. Before he slipped out your window and into the cracks early morning sunlight, he had pressed a gentle, chaste kiss to your cheek. It was only the briefest touch of his lips to your face, but you had held your face, right in that spot, for practically the entire day. Ned had questioned why, but you brushed him off with an answer of exhaustion. 

   The day after that, Peter returned to school, dragging Ned off to the side as soon as he stepped off the train platform. He had waited for the other boy purposely, seeking advice. 

   “I have a huge, gigantic, terrible awful problem right now, Ned!” He exclaimed as soon as he saw him, throwing his hands up in the air. “I need help.” 

   “Psychiatric help,” Michelle supplied, appearing out of nowhere as she usually did before walking down the path to school. 

   Ned shrugged. “She’s not wrong.” 

   Peter, frantic, seized Ned’s shoulders and shook him. “This is not a roast Peter session! This a cry for help! Help me, Ned Leeds!” 

   “Am I your only hope?” Peter wanted to scream. 

   “This isn’t the time for Star Wars puns, either!” Not waiting for Ned to quip back that every time was Star Wars time, Peter said, loudly, “I’m in love with Y/N and I don’t know what to do!” He ran his hands in his hair, wanting to pull it out. “I just- I just realized the other night! Everything just kind of, like, clicked and I’ve been so stupid. I should’ve realized it before, but of course I didn’t and now I have no idea what to do!” 

   “Wait, dude, you seriously have never noticed this before? Are you kidding me? Peter, you’re supposed to be the genius of the school. I feel let down.” Ned shook his head solemnly. “Dude, everyone knows you love her. Even Flash. That’s why he picks on her all the time. He likes pissing you off and nothing gets under your skin more than someone messing with Y/N. She’s the first one you told about being Spider-Man, you go to her for all your problems, you practically pee yourself racing to be her partner for almost everything- not science because science is our subject, but still. I figured you knew you loved her and just didn’t wanna talk about it because she’s out of your league.” 

   “Hey! I am not-” He stopped. “So what if I am? That’s not even the point. The point is that I love her. Me realizing it was inevitable, even if it took me like eighty years to get there. Doesn’t matter. I’ve gotta tell her, right?”

   “You totally should,” Ned encouraged. “She’s definitely in love with you, too.” 

    Hopefully, Peter grinned. “You really think so?” 

    “Anything’s possible!” 

    “The reassurance you give me is suffocating, Ned. Stop before I die.” 

    That day in gym class, Ned and Peter went off to the side to pretend they were doing stretches while you sat with Michelle and conversed about literature for the first half of the period. Your conversation, however, soon led off into other directions. 

    “Hey, MJ, have you ever… I don’t know, been in love?” 

    Michelle raised her eyebrows. “Only with crushing the patriarchy. Why? Have you?” The intuitive girl already knew your answer, of course, but she was invested in you and Peter’s love story and was desperate to hear the truth from your own lips. 

   You played with the hem of your shirt, thinking. Peter and Ned casually inched closer, having been listening to the conversation for quite sometime now. They were unapologetically nosy. “I think I am.” 

   “With who?” Peter clasped his hands together, silently pleading with the universe to grant him this one wish. I promise, universe, I’ll never ask for anything ever again in my whole life if you just let this girl love me back I swear I’ll be the best Spider-Man there ever was and I’ll protect New York until I’m eighty five just please oh my god please- 

   “With Peter.” 

   The gasp he let out was involuntary, but you didn’t hear him. He turned to Ned, his expression of shock, as well as elation, mirroring Peter’s own. Suddenly, Ned stood, shouting for the entire gym class to hear, “Y/N! Peter loves you too!” You looked up, Michelle’s happy and knowing smirk going unnoticed by you because the only thing you could focus on was Peter and what Ned had just declared. 

   The gym fell silent, every student turning to stare at you and Peter. You were frozen in shock up until the bell rang and everyone filed out quickly, leaving you and Peter alone. 

   “Did he mean it?” You asked, your sneakers squeaking against the floor as you closed the distance between you and Peter, your head tilted to meet his. 

   “It’s the truest thing anyone has ever said.” His lips met yours, and the slant of his mouth against your own was a feeling you could definitely come to adore more than you already did after just one kiss. 

[j-esbian]

night terrors and sweet dreams - chp. 2

chp. 1

on ao3

Nino awoke the next morning with a warm feeling in his belly, and he carried it all the way to school. Adrien had never answered his texts the night before--not that Nino had expected him to. It wasn’t uncommon for Adrien to not be able to reach his phone, especially during last-minute fittings, but it didn’t matter. Nino was bursting to talk to him at school.

Adrien was already there, scribbling in his notebook, probably scrambling to complete the homework he hadn’t been able to finish over the weekend. He seemed lost in thought, and Nino slipped into the seat next to him and peeked over his shoulder.

“‘Operation: Convince Nino Chat Noir is a Loser?’” Nino read out loud.

Adrien jumped and slammed the cover shut. “Oh, hey.”

“Nuh-uh.” Nino grabbed the notebook before Adrien could stop him, and flipped back to the right page.

“Dude, come on…” Adrien protested.

“Does this say ‘throw a fight?’ Are you proposing to fight Chat Noir, and then purposely lose?”  Nino chuckled. “What would that accomplish, exactly?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Adrien muttered. “I crossed that one out, anyway.”

“‘Act like a cat and see how much he likes it,’” Nino continued. “Man, what evidence do you have that Chat Noir is a literal cat?”

“What evidence do you have that says he isn’t?” Adrien replied. “Are you saying you’re a furry, Nino?”

Nino winked. “When I find out more about this particular feline, I’ll give you my answer.”

“Dude…”

“I’m just saying, I’m pretty sure he’s just a regular guy in a costume,” Nino said, shrugging. “But if having a thing for Chat Noir makes me a furry, then so be it.”

Adrien gaped at him.

“What?” Nino asked.

“Nino, man, you’re my best friend, and I love you,” Adrien said. “But sometimes, the things that come out of your mouth make me want to die.”

Nino ripped the page out, crumpled it up, and stuffed it into his bookbag. “Well, anyway, that’s the end of that.”

Adrien tugged at his notebook. “Can I have this back now?” Nino lifted his hands in surrender, and bent down to dig his own notes out of his bag.

He straightened up and spread his books out over the desk, fiddling nervously with his pen. “I mean, it’s not like I have a chance anyway, right?” he laughed.

“What do you mean?” Adrien asked.

Nino scoffed. “Come on. Even if Chat Noir did like dudes, which I doubt, everyone knows he’s, like, singularly obsessed with Ladybug.”

“Wait,” Adrien sputtered, “do you think Chat is straight?”

Nino leaned back in his chair. “Hey, Alya?” She was chatting with Marinette, and it took a few tries to get her attention.

“What?”

“Is Chat Noir into guys?” Nino asked.

“How should I know?” she returned. “I’ve never asked.”

“Come on,” Nino insisted. “You’ve done, like, millions of interviews.”

“Yeah, and it would be, like, super inappropriate to ask.”

“Oh, he definitely is,” Marinette said confidently. Alya, Nino, and Adrien looked at her in confusion, and she colored slightly. “I mean, I’ve heard him make a lot of jokes about being bisexual. You guys have heard him too, right? I totally get it if you blocked it out thought, because, like, some of them were really bad, and I mean… actually, maybe I’m thinking of someone else, after all. Yeah, that’s probably it.”

“No, I think you’re onto something,” Adrien ventured, eyeing her cautiously. He rounded on Nino. “Told you.”

Nino didn’t look too upset that he’d lost the argument; in fact, he wore a pretty triumphant smirk. The bell rang, and Ms. Bustier waited impatiently for the class to quiet down, putting an end to that discussion, but Nino wiggled his eyebrows at Adrien before turning to face the front.

Nino tried not to get his hopes up, but he couldn’t stop himself from lining up a few bags of snacks within the line of sight of his window. Just in case. But a week passed, and Chat Noir didn’t come by again.

“It’s stupid to think he’d drop in, right?” Nino complained. They were hanging out in Adrien’s room after school, and Nino had sprawled himself over the couch, while Adrien sat on the floor playing video games. “Like, it was just once, and for a dumb reason. And I probably creeped him out.”

“Well, he did show up out of nowhere,” Adrien replied, exasperation creeping into his tone. “And it was your bedroom, and it was late. If anything, he was being weird.”

Nino groaned and threw his arm across his eyes. “Doesn’t matter. I fucked it all up, Adrien. I mean, he didn’t even remember who I was, and I’ve made a movie about him, and then I freaked out when he just stopped in. That’s, like, class-A freaky shit.”

He sat bolt upright with the realization. “Oh god. What if he looked me up after he left and thought I was stalking him or something. Or, I mean, I didn’t ask to his permission to use that footage in the film festival. I know I didn’t win, so hopefully he doesn’t want royalties or anything, but he’s probably still pissed. I should have asked. Should I have? I should have. Right?

“But what if he doesn’t remember at all?” Nino continued. He swung his legs over the side of the couch and leaned forward, burying his head in his hands. “Then me bringing it up would be weird. Do you think he has, like, an email or something? That way it’s not face-to-face, at least.” He turned his head and rested his cheek against his palm, not caring that he was now staring and speaking directly into Adrien’s ear. “Do you think he has a lawyer?”

Adrien paused his game and closed his eyes for a beat, before throwing his controller aside and turning to face Nino. He scooted back to make some space between them and sighed. “Dude.”

Nino blinked innocently. “What?”

“Honestly, if you hit him with all of that, he’s probably just going to tell you to drop it, anyway.”

“Listen, man, I know I’m overthinking things,” Nino moaned. “But, like, how many chances am I going to get at a first impression with this guy? And how long until he connects the dots and realizes that it’s just me every time? God, does that seem desperate? Should I just--”

“Are you sure he didn’t remember who you were?” Adrien asked, rubbing the back of his neck. “I mean, like you said, you’ve run into him quite a few times now. It was probably just a joke.”

“But what if it wasn’t? And what if it was, but I look dumb for taking it seriously?” Nino leaned backwards, forcefully bouncing off the couch cushions a few times, and kicked his feet up on the coffee table. He let his head loll to the side. “Love is hard, bro.”

“L-love?” Adrien froze.

“I don’t know,” Nino replied helplessly. “I like him a lot, and he seems like a really cool dude. But I guess I don’t really know… anything about him. And I’d like to, you know? If only I could stop acting like such a spaz. I mean, you remember when I liked Marinette, right?”

An idea struck him at that moment, and his face lit up. “Hey, Adrien, you could be my wingman again!”

Adrien snorted. “Nope. No, no, I cannot and will not be your wingman.”

“Why not? I could probably get him to put in a good word for you with Ladybug. You know, after a little bit. When I don’t need you anymore.”

Adrien raised an eyebrow.

“I mean, when I don’t need to talk through you anymore.” Nino pouted.

Adrien winced. “Wouldn’t it be better if you didn’t need me in the first place?”

“Okay, but consider: I’ve already tried talking to him without you around, and it was a disaster.” Nino pleaded. “Come on, man, not even, like, once?”

Adrien sighed in defeat. “Okay, fine. The next time me, you, and Chat Noir are in the same place, I’ll help you flirt with him.” He smiled to himself and shook his head. “Only because I love you, Nino.” He picked up his controller and unpaused the game, signalling an end to the conversation.

Nino pulled his phone out and scrolled through the notifications that clustered on his screen. “Okay, cool,” he said slyly, “because Alya just saw an akuma headed this way, so Chat’s probably not far behind.”

“What?” Adrien whirled around; behind him, his character died, and the video game played a few strains of somber music, but he just stared at Nino blankly.

“Uh, yeah,” Nino replied, grinning shamelessly. “Apparently she thinks it’s Mendeleiev. About time, right?”

“Ha. Yeah, I guess.” Adrien swallowed hard. “Hey, listen, I’m going to go jump in the shower.”

Nino crossed his arms. “Really?”

Adrien laughed nervously. “Yes…? My hair’s been feeling kind of greasy all day, and--”

“Super convenient that it comes up right now, when you literally just said--” Nino cut himself off. “No, you know what? Whatever, dude. I’m going to watch Alya’s livestream.”

Adrien got up and ran to the bathroom, but paused in the doorway. Nino was curled in on himself, sitting with his feet on the couch and his arms resting on his knees, with his back to Adrien. His shoulders rose around his ears when he heard the bathroom door open, and he pointedly ignored the impulse to turn around. He could feel Adrien’s eyes on him.

Good. He should feel bad.

The bathroom door shut a few moments later.

What was it about the Agrestes’ house that made it a magnet for akumas? As the house shook around him, Nino reflected that Adrien might be cursed.

Silenceleste, as Alya’s blog told him, had the power to silence anyone with a single glare. He’d seen the footage where she shot out a bright blue bolt of lasers and snuffed out an entire Jagged Stone concert in seconds.

The Eiffel Tower and the surrounding neighborhood were eerily silent, so he guessed it must have been all too easy to hear him yell, “Fuck yeah!” through the open window when he caught sight of Ladybug swinging past.

Silenceleste slipped in gracefully through the window, and Nino backed up hastily, running for cover. Chat and Ladybug followed her in, landing silently but still attracting her attention, giving Nino time to hide. He jiggled the bathroom handle, but the door was locked, and he banged desperately on it. “Adrien, come on, dude, open the door! I’m not mad at you, it’s dumb, okay? I just really need you to let me in!”

She swiveled her head around to glare at him, and he was briefly blinded by a burst of light, and when he opened his mouth again, nothing came out.

Ladybug winced at him sympathetically, but Chat gestured frantically for him to hunker down somewhere. Ladybug tossed her yo-yo up in the air and mouthed, “Lucky Charm!”

A spotted bandana fell into her hands, and she squinted at it in confusion. Chat, meanwhile, had engaged Silenceleste in combat. It was surreal to see his baton clashing up against her weapon without hearing any of the sounds they should have made. Nino felt like someone had just slipped noise-cancelling headphones over his ears.

Whatever her weapon was, Silenceleste didn’t seem to be very proficient in its use. It appeared to just be a long, flat piece of sturdy metal, which she brandished wildly at Chat in haphazard swipes. He easily sidestepped most of them, but still couldn’t seem to disarm her; every time he seemed close to victory, her slender weapon slipped away again.

A lightbulb went off over Ladybug’s head, and while Chat had the villain distracted, she motioned Nino to her. He crawled over, dodging Chat’s baton a few times, and looked at her inquisitively. She presented the bandana to him, then tapped next to her eyes, and pointed at the bandana in his hands, her gaze darting between him and Silenceleste. He nodded, and tucked it into his pocket before slipping away again.

Ladybug approached Silenceleste, and between the two heroes, her attention was sufficiently diverted enough for Nino to sneak up behind her and pull the bandana around over her eyes. She fell over in alarm, bringing Nino down with her as he held tightly onto the blindfold. In the chaos, they landed on Chat Noir, and Ladybug leaned down daintily to pick up her weapon, snapping it neatly over her knee. As the butterfly emerged from the broken pieces, and she purified the akuma, Nino picked himself up sheepishly, and held out a hand to help Chat stand.

“You okay, man?” he tried to say, but Ladybug still hadn’t used her Miraculous cure. “Oh, sorry. I can’t talk.”

Chat nodded gratefully, and winked instinctively as he let go of Nino’s hand.

Nino’s face turned bright red, and he hastily averted his eyes, trying to suppress a grin. His hand hovered around his mouth, before falling to his side.

He was saved any further embarrassment by the flurry of ladybugs that appeared to do their magic, and when he regained his voice, Chat’s attention was focused elsewhere.

Ladybug held the reconstructed meter stick out to Mme. Mendeleiev, who was standing uncomfortably stiff and silent in the middle of one of her students’ bedrooms.

“Um…” Chat eyed the doors critically. “Sorry about this, ma’am, but I think you’re going to have to leave through the window with us. I don’t think Mr. Agreste would appreciate a stranger going through his house, for whatever reason.”

Nino snickered. Chat leaned out the window, extending his baton until it reached the street, and prodded her to slide down it. She did, at a snail’s pace, gripping the pole tightly and trying not to look down.

“Tell your friend sorry about his room,” Ladybug apologized to Nino. “Although everything should be fine, now.”

Nino waved her off. “He probably didn’t hear anything, and I promise, he won’t even notice.”

Ladybug nodded briskly, and smiled at him in farewell; then she jumped out the window and flew away on her yo-yo.

Chat pulled his baton back up and readied it to launch himself away, but he paused when he noticed Nino staring at him. They stood frozen like that for a few seconds, before the beeping of his ring startled him.

He saluted. “Well, see you around, Nino.”

“Yeah, see you,” Nino replied faintly. Chat took off, and Nino watched him for a few brief moments before he disappeared behind a building.

As soon as he was out of sight, Nino rushed back over to the bathroom door and pounded on it urgently. “Adrien, dude! You’re never going to believe this!”