#This little sideblog is small and doesn't have many followers

[navybrat817]

A Little Push

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader Summary: Bucky doesn't think he deserves to be with you, but gets a little push to speak up when he sees your ex. Word Count: Over 5.1k Warnings: E.S.C, unprotected (v)aginal (s)ex (wrap it before you tap it), shower (s)ex, jealousy, (f)lirting, insecurities, slight feels (it's me), idiotic Bucky Barnes (he’s a warning, okay?) and an ex. A/N: For @drabblewithfrannybarnes and the gym prompt. I hope you like it! ❤️ Beta read by the wonderful @whisperlullaby, but any and all mistakes are my own. Moodboard by yours truly, banner by the lovely @sgt-seabass (and thank you!), and divider by the amazing @firefly-graphics. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

Bucky wondered some days if he made the right choice by working for S.H.I.E.L.D.. While he didn’t consider himself to be completely standoffish as he recovered, no matter how much Sam tried to joke about that, he still had a difficult time getting along with some of the agents. It wasn’t for lack of trying. He attempted to strike up conversations with a few, but that only led to forced interactions and awkward silences.

He didn’t try much after that.

Maybe they didn’t trust him because of his past, even with the work he had done with the Avengers, even though he had no choice in his past actions. He wouldn’t hold that against them. He was even ready to accept that his circle of friends would remain small, which he didn’t mind.

But he hadn’t expected you to come along.

“You can sit with me if you’d like.”

At first, he thought you were talking to someone else until he realized your gaze was on him. He didn’t recognize you, but he remembered Steve saying that they were getting a transfer from another division. He hoped he wasn’t glaring or giving you an awkward stare, but your beautiful smile threw him for a loop. Unless he was with Steve and the others, no one asked him to sit with them.

But you did.

It took another moment for him to respond, but he took you up on your offer and joined you. He also picked up on the stares right away from the other agents, like they were jealous that he managed to get your attention. He didn’t blame them for wanting it.

Especially since the next smile you gave him made him fall in love a little more.

Maybe love at first sight does exist.

“Do you go by Bucky or James? I can call you Sarge if you want, Sergeant.”

You explained over breakfast that you transferred because you needed a change and were excited to take on some new tasks. He didn’t pick up on any bad intentions as you spoke with him. He found it easy to talk to you. You even got a couple of smiles out of him.

“Thanks for sitting with me. Do you want to have breakfast with me again tomorrow?”

Bucky accepted.

As the two of you grew closer, it became routine to grab breakfast together in the breakroom and chat quietly between reps when you worked out. He even shifted his schedule around so the two of you could exercise together. He looked forward to it.

And naturally on his path to continue making amends, he had to punish himself by thinking he wasn’t good enough for you. Because why would he be? You became an agent to help others and how many had he destroyed? Not by choice, never his choice, but he was still waging that war in his mind and heart.

“Will today finally be the day, Barnes?” Natasha asked as she finished her stretches.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Bucky grumbled, his eyes flickering to the clock on the wall as he waited for you to enter the onsite gym.

“Yes, you do and let it be today, please. I can’t have Rogers winning the pool.”

“You’re taking bets, Romanoff?” he asked with a cold stare, as if the Black Widow would cower under his gaze. “Un-fucking-believable.”

He told Steve in confidence that he liked being around you. So, naturally, Sam and Natasha found out not long after that. Steve said more than once that Bucky wouldn’t be breaking any bylaws by dating you. Natasha added in passing that mixing business with pleasure didn’t seem to bother you as you had dated another agent sometime back before your transfer. An amicable breakup from what Sam heard.

For living in a world of spies and soldiers, no one could seem to keep their mouths shut.

“I’ll split the winnings with you,” she offered unapologetically. “You can use it to take her on a date. You do have something nice to wear that isn’t a Henley, right?”

The smartass remark he had on the tip of his tongue died when you walked through the door. Clad in your normal black tank top and leggings with your bag on your shoulder, he found himself staring the way he always did as you glided along the floor with confidence and a smile. A few heads turned to get a glimpse as you walked by.

But you directed your gaze at him.

“Hey, handsome,” you smiled, setting your bag and water down. You didn’t call anyone handsome or any other sort of nickname, except for him.

“Hi?”

Why did that come out as a question?

“Hopeless,” Natasha muttered softly enough for him to hear. “Hey.”

“Hey, Nat. How’s it going?”

His cheeks warmed as you began your stretches and chatted with the redhead, wanting nothing more than to put his hands on your hips and guide your body. He wanted to believe that you liked him enough for him to make a move. Why else would you keep getting breakfast with him?

And why else were you bending over right in front of him in a pair of leggings that looked like a second skin?

Fuck.

“Oh, I have your book in my bag,” you said, looking at him from between your legs. “Thanks for lending it to me.”

Thank fuck I’m upside down from your angle so you don’t see me staring at your ass.

Guilt crept in as he blinked. You were nothing but kind and accepting and here he was oogling over you. Why couldn’t he get it through his head that he was your friend and nothing more?

On the other hand, why couldn’t he get it through his head that he had the right to be happy?

“Don’t mention it,” he said.

“Do you mind spotting me?” you asked once you finished warming up. “Unless you plan to help Nat. I can wait.”

“Oh, no. I’m just here for entertainment,” she joked.

“Thanks,” you smiled, heading to the first machine with Bucky in tow. “Any plans this weekend?” you asked, checking the weight on the bar before you took a seat.

“No plans,” he said, taking his spot at the end of the bench so he could spot you. “Kind of a boring old man.”

“You’re not boring,” you said, winking as you laid back. “But I’ll give you old.”

“Rude,” he smiled as you giggled. “What about you?”

“Nope. No plans,” you answered, giving him a glance as you set your hands on the bar. “No plans at all.”

Are you giving me an opening?

“That’s too bad,” is what he said.

“Yeah, I guess it is,” you said with quiet disappointment.

Sorry, Nat. Not winning the pool today because I’m a fucking idiot.

Bucky kept stealing glances at you as the two of you went through your normal workout routine, unable to figure out how you managed to look beautiful while lifting weights. The fact of the matter is you looked beautiful to him no matter what you did. He fluctuated between his heart stopping and losing his breath whenever he saw you. Especially when you smiled at him.

And he wouldn’t take that leap.

“You know what sounds really nice? A massage,” you said, setting the weight down to grab your water. He focused on your mouth as you brought the bottle to your lips, his fingers flexing as you swallowed once. Twice.

Are you giving me another opening?

Before Bucky could think of a suave reply, the door opened. A tall, dark haired agent he didn’t recognize walked in and did a slow sweep of the gym. From the quick assessment, he gathered that the guy was in shape. He didn’t necessarily walk through like he owned the place, but it bordered on cockiness.

I don’t even know him, so why do I want to punch his face in?

“Wait. Is that Nate?” you asked, your gaze following the man as Natasha silently walked over to join you. “What’s he doing here?”

Nate?

“You know him?” Bucky asked as the guy, Nate apparently, stopped to chat with someone by the mirrors.

“Uh, yeah,” you said, setting your water down and wiping your hands on your thighs as you avoided his gaze. “He’s my ex-boyfriend.”

Ex-boyfriend?

“You two worked in the same division, didn’t you? Before you transferred?” Natasha asked. You nodded in reply. “It didn’t work out with you two, huh?”

“No, but it wasn’t a dramatic breakup or anything. No hard feelings,” you explained.

Bucky remembered Sam saying it was amicable, but he still felt the need to shield you away from your ex. Even if he hadn’t spotted you yet. Maybe he was ignoring you. That couldn’t be it. No one could ignore you.

Did you want him to notice you?

“That’s a shame,” Natasha said, swinging her gaze toward Bucky. “He’s cute.”

Traitor. Thought you were my friend.

“Yeah, he is,” you agreed.

Bucky grabbed the nearest barbell to get his head back into why he was in the gym in the first place, gritting his teeth so hard he was shocked they didn’t crack.

“And there’s this thing he used to do with his tongue that just…” you trailed off with a sigh.

The metal hand gripped the barbell tighter. Nate was an ex, not a current boyfriend. It didn’t work out for a reason.

“You need a moment?” the redhead asked.

“No, I just need to get laid,” you said, glancing at Bucky out of the corner of your eye.

If you need to get laid, I can help you with that. Not Nate or some other prick. They’re not worthy of touching you. Neither am I, but that’s not the fucking point. I can do things with my tongue that’ll make you see stars.

“Bucky?” you asked gently. “Are you okay?”

Far fucking from it.

“Yeah, I’m good. Why?”

You pointed to the barbell in his hands. “Because you just bent that in half.”

Glancing down at his hands, he saw that the stainless steel was indeed bent in half and ignored Natasha’s snort as he tried to fix it. “I was just testing the durability. It’s terrible. A health and safety hazard, really.”

“I didn’t realize your job involved quality assurance,” you teased as he set the piece of equipment down.

“It’s kind of a new hobby,” he said, a weird look crossing his face.

A new hobby? Really?

“Okay, Sarge,” you giggled.

Your laughter seemed to catch Nate’s attention since he immediately looked behind him. A look of realization crossed his features before he smiled. The look on his face made Bucky’s heart drop as he excused himself from the agent he was speaking to and made a beeline toward you. The man may not be your boyfriend anymore, but he still felt something for you.

Either that or the look of longing was easily faked.

“Hey!" Nate smiled as he stopped in front of you, opening his arms as he leaned in. "Good to see you."

“You, too. And you don’t want to do that,” you said, gesturing to yourself. “I’m all sweaty.”

“Never bothered me before,” he said, wrapping his arms around you. He met Bucky’s gaze over your shoulder with the smallest of smirks. “Smell just as good as I remember.”

“Don’t,” Natasha whispered to Bucky when the hug lingered for a few more seconds.

Bucky wasn’t planning on doing anything. Not right now, at least. Committing murder wasn’t on his “to do” list when he woke up today, but he was seconds away from snapping. Would you forgive him if he broke one of Nate’s bones?

“You must be Bucky,” Nate said once he released you.

He had to stop himself from shoving you behind his back. “You must be the ex,” he said, not bothering with any attempt to be friendly. “Why are you here?”

Nate either didn’t intimidate easily or he didn’t care. “You talked about me?” he teased, nudging you with his elbow.

“No, not really,” you smiled a little, raising an eyebrow at Bucky.

He tried to keep a straight face because he wasn’t jealous. He had no reason to be jealous. That certainly wasn’t the reason why his fingers began to twitch. Wasn’t the reason he wanted to knock Nate’s teeth in.

Not at all.

“To anwer your question, I accepted a transfer and was getting a look around the place. I was also here to exercise, but now I think I want to catch up,” he smiled, turning his attention back to you.

“You transferred here?” you asked in disbelief.

You don’t sound thrilled, which is a good sign, right?

“Yeah, I got promoted,” he explained, angling his body to put distance between you and Bucky. “You doing anything after this?”

“Me,” Bucky said before his brain caught up with his mouth.

Maybe you didn't hear me.

Your eyebrows shot up as you leaned around Nate to stare at Bucky. "I'm doing you?" you asked.

Fuck, you heard me.

"Yeah, Barnes. Is she doing you?" Natasha asked without a hint of humor in her tone as Nate glared over his shoulder.

"I mean," he cleared his throat as he tried to think of an excuse, which wasn't easy with three pairs of eyes on him. "She's hanging out with me. Movie night."

"It's not even nighttime," Nate said skeptically.

"It's an early movie night," he grumbled.

"Yeah, an early movie night," you agreed slowly. Bucky almost sighed in relief before you looked at Nate. "But we can catch up later, okay? Think my workout is over for now."

Bucky's mouth fell open when you went to grab your things. "But-"

"Movie night. I know. Thanks for your help," you smiled, but it seemed forced. "I'll see you later, Nat. And Nate."

"Later," Nate said, his gaze lingering as you headed toward the locker room. "She really is something, isn't she?"

"Yeah, she is," Bucky agreed, staring after you, too. He couldn't argue with that.

"It's really nice that you two are friends," Nate smiled, clapping Bucky on the shoulder as his blood boiled. "Enjoy your movie night."

Natasha stepped in front of Bucky before he could go after the prick. "Do not," she said as Nate headed toward another machine.

"I have to do something," Bucky said because he was close to losing it.

"You really want to do something?" she asked, tilting her head toward the locker room. "Go talk to her. Please."

"Fine. I will," Bucky said, stepping around Natasha as he made up his mind.

"I meant when she was done!" she called after him.

Bucky stalked toward the locker room and pushed the double doors open. He took a breath as he walked through the first row of lockers and spotted you sitting on the bench. Was he making a big mistake?

"You lost?" you asked, removing one of your shoes.

He crossed his arms and shook his head as you took off the other shoe. "You didn't do a cool down."

You met his eyes and smiled. "That's why you came in here?"

"Did you know Nate would be here?" he blurted out.

Smooth.

You blinked slowly at him before you removed your socks. "Nope. And why would it matter if I did? He still works for this organization. Besides, we broke up and moved on."

"If he moved on, why was he smiling at you like that?" he accused.

You stood up with a shrug. "Because we get along? He's a friendly guy. That's just how he is."

"I know how guys smile at girls they like," he said. He knew because he smiled at you that way. "He's still into you."

The frown you gave him made him want to kiss it away before you giggled. "He is not into me anymore."

"Are you two going to date again?" he asked, taking two steps forward. You were still out of his reach. "I know I don't have the right to ask, but I have to know."

Because you're not my girl.

“No, you don't," you confirmed, your gaze softening as you shook your head. "But no, I’m not going to date him again. He's my ex for a reason and that's that."

Bucky inhaled and exhaled slowly, able to breathe a little easier.

"Why? Would it bother you if I did? Because if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were jealous. Bending the bar? Your not-so-subtle excuse for me not to hang out with him? Following me in here?"

The words got stuck in his throat as you waited for an answer, an expectant look on your face. Why was it so hard to say that it would bother him? It shouldn't because if that made you happy, he'd respect that.

Was it wrong that he wanted you to be happy with him and not some other guy?

You hung your head for a split second before you turned back to your locker. "Look, are you done grilling me or are you sticking around?" you asked, pulling your top over your head. "Because I have to shower."

"You think I won't follow you and finish this conversation?"

Your bra came off next. He knew that because you tossed the garment at his face and he was too stunned to catch it. It took him a moment to realize that you were facing him again, your breasts on display as you placed your hands on your hips.

A gentleman would have looked away. A good man would have left. But he was something else entirely and he couldn't stop staring at the vision of perfection in front of him.

"You're free to do whatever you want," you said casually as you spun around and shimmied out of your leggings. His eyes followed the curves as your underwear came off next and it took everything in him not to throw you across the bench and fuck you until you screamed his name. "But I told you. I have to shower."

Bucky didn't speak as you grabbed your towel and shower bag. You didn't bother covering up as you sauntered away from him, like being naked around him was a perfectly normal thing. He wanted it to be a normal thing.

Was that an invitation? Should he take it? Or was it a test?

"Fuck it," he mumbled as he kicked off his shoes and stripped, leaving his clothes next to yours as he searched for you again. If you ended up screaming or punching him, he'd accept that punishment and beg your forgiveness later. He let this go on long enough.

He froze when he saw you under the spray of the water, his cock twitching with interest as he watched the droplets slide from your chest to the vee between your legs. You had your eyes closed and he wasn't sure if he should call out to get your attention. He didn't want to frighten you and make you fall.

You gasped when you opened your eyes, but didn't make a move to cover yourself. He imagined this is what some men saw when a siren lured them out to sea. Beauty that they weren't worthy of looking upon, but too far gone to care as the tide swept them away.

"I guess you really want to finish that conversation?" you asked, your gaze dropping from his face to his chest and a bit lower.

Under your gaze, he wasn't afraid of you looking upon his scars. "I was jealous. I am jealous. I hated seeing him touch you," he admitted.

He wanted to replace Nate's touch with his own.

"There's nothing to be jealous of," you said, swallowing as he moved forward.

"Can't help it," he said, not blinking as he moved closer. "You also said I could do whatever I wanted."

"I did," you nodded.

His wide shoulders blocked some of the spray as he stepped into the shower and backed you against the wall. "What if I said I wanted to do you?"

Very fucking eloquent.

"I'd say it's about fucking time since I've been trying to get your attention and it better not be a joke," you said, placing your hands on his shoulders as your gaze went to his chest again.

You actually want me. Fuck.

He grasped your chin and lifted your head. The corner of his mouth twitched like he wanted to smile and his heart raced as his lips ghosted over yours. "You like me? And you want me to fuck you?"

He needed to hear you say it.

"I was hinting for you to ask me out this weekend. I thought it was obvious?" you asked, a small, vulnerable crack in your voice. "I like you, okay? I'm crazy about you. I have been since you sat down and had breakfast with me that first day and I-"

"I'm a fucking idiot," he whispered before his lips met yours.

His head spun as he kissed you unashamedly, unleashing the want he kept pent up for too long and showing no mercy as he swallowed down the moan you let out. His hands slid down to grip your ass, capturing another small sound in his mouth as he slipped his thigh between your legs. Now that it was out in the open, that you wanted him, he couldn't stop himself.

Unless you told him to.

"So, you like me, too?" you breathed out as he pressed kisses along your neck, your nails digging into his shoulders as he thrust his knee against your wetness.

Gonna lose my fucking mind when I'm inside you.

"So much that I wanted to break Nate's fingers. Or his face," he told you, nipping over your pulse, but careful not to leave a mark. "Want you to forget all about that thing he does with his fucking tongue."

"You up for the challenge?" you teased before he growled.

"Up for it?" he asked as he slid a hand up to your chest, his thumb brushing over your nipple as you whimpered for him. "I'm gonna ruin you. That's a fucking promise."

"Do it. Please," you begged, bringing a hand down to brush your fingers along his thick cock. "Ruin me."

You already looked overwhelmed with pleasure, your eyes half lidded and mouth parted as Bucky moved his knee away and brought one of your legs around his hip. He wanted to fall to his knees and get a taste, but he'd claim you later with his tongue. "Not letting you go if I have you," he warned you, helping you stroke him.

"You better not," you said.

Bucky could've put his fingers under the water, but he brought them to his mouth to wet them before he slipped it between your legs. "You'll be mine," he said as he teased your hole.

"I'm already yours," you gasped as he carefully pushed a finger in and thrust slowly.

"Are you?" he asked, brushing his lips against your jaw as he slid a second finger in. "Fuck, you're tight. You may kill me."

"Yes, I'm yours. And I won't kill you, but I'll make you sorry if you don't fuck me," you huffed impatiently.

He chuckled as he removed his fingers, missing the heat of your body. He understood not wanting to wait any longer. He fucked his own hand enough nights as he thought of you to know that it wasn't enough.

"What if someone walks in?" he questioned, sucking his fingers clean with an obscene groan.

I can convince you to take a day off just to eat you out, right?

"I don't care!" you cried, your voice echoing in the stall as he moved the tip of his cock along your folds. You canted your hips as you tried to take him in and, fuck, if that didn't feed his ego. "If you don't fuck me, I swear I'll- AHH!"

He groaned as he slid home in one thrust, his eyes fluttering shut as your velvety walls gripped him like your life depended on it. He took a deep breath so he didn't lose it on the second thrust. Your perfect pussy was his new home. He never wanted to leave.

"Fuck, baby, you're so needy. I think you want everyone to see that you're mine now," he groaned as he caressed your thigh and drove in deep. Your cunt welcomed each slide as he kept your hips still with his other hand. "Gonna fuck you so hard you won't walk for a week. The way I should've from the start."

"Don't hold back," you moaned, clenching lightly around him. "I can take it."

Bucky couldn't remember ever fucking someone so possessively. "Pussy's even better than I imagined. Made for me. Made for me to wreck."

"Fuck, yes," you cried in response. "Touched myself thinking of you fucking me."

"You fucked your perfect pussy thinking of me?" he asked, imagining your fingers deep inside you. "Moaned my name?"

"Yes," you replied, biting your lip. "Fingers aren't as big as you."

Fuck. There's only so much a man can take.

"Look so beautiful taking my cock. Gonna be so good to you," he grunted, his wet hair falling in front of his eyes. If he had to guess, he probably looked unhinged. Feral. Out of control. "Not letting you go."

Instead of looking afraid, you reached up and lightly threaded your fingers through his hair as your leg shook against his hip. "I won't let you."

He kissed you, almost delirious as the rush of pleasure began to take over. You took his hard, fast thrusts, the symphony of your cries and his moans adding to the sound of wet, slapping skin. Later, he'd make love to you, kiss over every square inch of your beautiful body. He'd tell how crazy he is about you. How you made him happy again.

For now, he needed you to scream his name for the whole gym to hear.

"I'm close, Bucky," you panted into his mouth. "Please."

He doubled his efforts, thrusting so hard he lost his breath with each snap of his hips. "If you're really mine, come. Come for me."

You nearly sobbed his name as you quivered around him, a wave of wetness coating his cock as he kept up his pace and fucked you through your orgasm. "Good girl," he praised as you went limp in his hold.

It was a beautiful sight. Your dazed expression, your cunt clenching with a fresh wave of wetness as you whined. A fucking vision.

"I'm gonna…" he warned, his muscles tensing up as he got closer to the edge.

"Come in me," you begged, tightening around him again. "Please, I need it."

Fuck.

Bucky spilled hot and thick inside you with a guttural moan as he let the ecstasy within him explode, relieved that you didn't make him leave the haven of your body. He was careful not to crush you against the wall as he tried to catch his breath and process that what just happened was real. It wasn't a dream or fantasy. He had you in his arms under the warm water.

Could've had this ages ago if I spoke up.

His lips found yours, his kiss softer than the previous ones. He wasn't sure how long he held you like that, but it was everything he dreamt of and everything he denied himself. He wouldn't do that again.

"You okay? Did I hurt you?"

"No," you smiled, your breathing still a bit tagged. "And I think I can still walk."

He growled playfully as he rolled his hips, thankful that he had the strength to keep holding you up. His stamina was good for some things. "Come to movie night and I'll make sure you don't walk. You did say you needed to get laid."

"I did say that," you smiled, nipping his bottom lip. "I'll do a movie night if you take me out on a real date."

"This weekend since neither of us have plans. I'd be a bad boyfriend if I didn't take care of you, right?" he asked, kissing the corner of your mouth to avoid your surprised gaze.

Pushed my luck this far. I can go a bit further.

"It's a date," you smiled.

Bucky smiled back as he reached over to shut the water off, wishing he could blame the warmth for the blush in his cheeks. "Sorry it took me so long to get my head out of my ass."

"I forgive you," you said, your nose nudging his.

"I just wanted you to have better," he whispered.

You deserve the best.

You blinked away the leftover pleasure that lingered in your eyes. "What? You're already the best guy I know, handsome. No one is better than you," you said, the sincerity in your eyes making his heart twist. "I know you'll be the best boyfriend for me."

Thank you.

"Well, as the best boyfriend, I think I owe you one more orgasm before we go," he smirked, his hands roaming your body. "If you're up for it."

"I'll take whatever you give me," you said before you smirked back. "But maybe I should thank Nate since he's the one who got your head out of your ass."

"Don't you fucking dare," he said, kissing you breathless before you could say his name again.

Bucky was your boyfriend now and the only name he wanted to tumble from your beautiful lips was his own. He'd do whatever he could to make that happen. And be the man you deserve.

Natasha watched from the corner of the gym as you and Bucky emerged from the locker room minutes later. You had stars in your eyes and Bucky looked over the moon. Your legs wobbled slightly and the soldier easily slid an arm around your waist to steady you and walk you out. He even threw Nate a smirk and a wink when he got a glimpse of the two of you.

The redhead messaged the group chat for the bet once the two of you were out of sight. "Locker room. I won."

"What? I was so close!" Steve messaged back.

"Cheater!" Sam sent. "I know you got her ex transferred here. Don't deny it."

"I did not get him transferred. I just knew and didn't tell them he'd be here today. I expect my payment at dinner tonight."

The redhead put her phone away as she tried not to smile. Bucky just needed a push and she wasn't afraid to play a little dirty. But she'd keep her word and split the winnings.

The two of you deserved a nice date, after all.

Oh, Bucky. Whatever will we do with you? Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[wonda-fhr]

WIP Wednesday

Thanks for the tag @autumnfangirler (cause it is about fhr, the answer goes to the sideblog.)

Actually, I have too many stories in the works right now. So I have chosen one for this Wednesday. This one is (again) for David and hasn't got a title yet, so it's still called "new scene". ^^ Have lost track of who has been tagged already and just give a guess at a few names. @just-a-tiny-goldfish @extreme-neutral @idlenight Do you have something to share? Excerpt under the cut ->

You dive under Daniel's next attack, spinning in the process, and come to a stop behind him, laughing as you bump into his shoulder blades. "Distracted me? No way." He continues to overestimate your size, which often allows you to dodge low. Does he start to hover when he swings with one leg? You need to pay more attention, a single inch of hovering would explain why he missed. Maybe he doesn't even notice. The small, sparse grove even offers some protection from the sun. You feel the breeze as his arm brushes your cheek a little too clearly, too close. Your reaction pushes him back a little, giving you more room to move in this clearing that seems to have been planted just for a picnic. Even the old tree trunks are perfectly placed at the edge, slightly shaded and inviting you to make yourself comfortable. A sudden tug on your leg reminds you that you haven't shifted your weight properly. Unstable. Careless. You still try to compensate for your stumble, you manage not to fall, but your forehead collides hard with the old pine that has silently followed your training. Hell, you're really too distracted. The question of why he wanted to know the exact time of your training doesn't leave your mind while your hand scans your forehead for a wound.

[daughter-of-sapph0]

Hello! Congratulations on nine thousand followers... wow. Now that it's been... gosh... nearly an entire year since its conclusion, how do you feel about the best-evangelion-girl poll, in distant retrospect? I'm still a bit salty that Lilith didn't win, but hey, ridiculous gimmick polls are a democracy and I've only got one vote. Have you ever felt like you might host some other similarly complex poll again? I would really like to hear your final thoughts on the whole running-a-gimmick-poll-blog experience, now that that one is over. It's the reason why I found your main blog in the first place lol. I also really like your OCs, I ended up looking through your 'my art' tag one day and your pixel art, both old and new, is amazing. I hope you are having a wonderful ninethousandfollowersday. #lilithsweep

hi bestie! thanks for the ask

here's a quick explanation for everyone who doesn't know. I have a sideblog @best-evangelion-girl. now, it's mainly a queue blog for the anime stuff I like. but original it was a poll gimmick blog, to find which character in Evangelion was definitively the best girl and end the dumb debate once and for all. the only catch, none of the participants where any of the human characters from eva. they were all either angels or evas or mechs or whatever from the manga, anime, rebuilds, and other spinoffs. in the end, Ramiel ended up winning. but fan favorites Lilith, Unit-02, and Misato's Car all came in close behind.

I would say that in retrospect, if I would do that whole thing again, I would have planned it out better. firstly I would only do half as many entries. a lot of them were just filler. there were a ton of repeat entries because of the differences between the anime and rebuilds, and a bunch of nothing entries like the eva 4444C or whatever that cannon fodder from the fourth rebuild movie was called. I also would have scheduled the posts out ahead of time, instead of making them the day the results came in. also, I literally made all the posts on my phone during work, which probably isn't the best use of my fifteen minutes. I probably should have just waited until I got home lol.

my advice to anyone making a gimmick poll blog as someone who's done it twice now (I also had one for fictional transgender characters), start small. you don't need 64 or even 32 unique entries. you can just keep it simple. also, if you feel like it, try seeding your results based on what either you think is the most popular or by having a mini poll of a bunch of entries and ranking those by popularity.

as for if I'll host another competition like that, I'm not sure if I will. I don't have anything planned at the moment, but I'll keep you posted.

also, thanks for checking out my OCs! I love my little blorbos, and I'm super happy other people like them too! I'm still trying to figure out my style, but I feel like I've finally nailed it. pixel art is amazing, and after being almost entirely self taught for about two years, I feel like I've improved dramatically.

[lamonnaie]

thanks for the tag @sollucets i loved reading ur answers !!! 🫶🫶 i've been a little ia lately + busy with irl things but i'm slowly trying to work through the backlog of tag games 😅

1. why did you choose your url?

it's from the french words "la monnaie," which basically means small change. i found the word amusing when i first learnt it a while ago and i've been using it as a username practically everywhere ever since :]

2. any sideblogs? name them and why you have them

technically no? i set up the ao3 feed for the dangerous romance tag on a sideblog pretty much just for my own convenience, but that doesn't rlly count lol

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

i've been lurking on tumblr since ~2015, when you could actually use the website pretty functionally even without an account, but i only made this account in 2020.

4. do you have a queue tag?

i do! it's just "q" (although it's empty right now because i haven't been on much 😩😩)

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

i finally made a tumblr account after 5 yrs of lurking because of this one niche movie that had somewhat of a fandom on here and i wanted to interact lol

6. why did you choose your icon?

because fairy lights !! they're pretty :))

(i use this icon everywhere as well as my url, i think i've only ever changed it once on here)

7. why did you choose your header?

i had to go back and check my blog because i genuinely didn't remember what my header was 😭😭 but it's just a cute gif off of google that i picked coz i liked it :)

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

apparently this post about akkayan and raysand??? guess that answers the shitposts question as well LMAO

9. how many mutuals do you have?

quite a few !! is there any way of actually finding out the number? i have no clue, but if someone follows me i tend to check out their blog and if we have similar interests i'll follow back :] that being said, probably around 30-ish who i've actually interacted with beyond mutual liking and rbing hehe

10. how many followers do you have?

382!

11. how many people do you follow?

486 - definitely need to do a clean out tho because i follow a lot of random blogs from interests long gone by

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

yes lol

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

it depends honestly, sometimes several times a day for several hours (😭), other times i'll go a day or two without opening it <//3

14. have you had a fight/argument with another blog?

nah, if i don't agree with something i'll just unfollow and/or block

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

very unnecessary, i get that there's good intention behind it but it's honestly just annoying to see and will actively make me not reblog it 😭 (or at the very least i'll go back and rb a version without the addition)

16. do you like tag games?

HELL YEAH, i love yapping about things 🥰🥰

17. do you like ask games?

yesss they're so much fun !!!! (that being said, my askbox is so wonky that it never saves my posts as i'm writing and then it'll randomly crash and i just the ask altogether????)

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

hmm i have no concept of tumblr famousness but just looking through my moots there's quite a few who i feel are pretty well known???

that being said, gonna give a shoutout to dee @distant-screaming who is the most famous person ever to me because i love love love their fics so much 😭😭😭 like have i ever fully watched nlmg? nope. do i still constantly go back and read her palmnueng fics? absolutely.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

no i wouldn't say so :) i admire a lot of people on here and i love all my mutuals <33 (but in a platonic way hehe)

20. tags?

i feel like people have done this already (so no pressure + pls tag me in ur post if u've already done it !!) but tagging @dramalets @distant-screaming @winnysatang @hellswolfie @blackstar-gazer <33

[howtobecomeadragon]

hello!! this is perexcri because tumblr is dumb and doesn't let sideblogs send asks :) anyway!! for the book asks: 32, 38, 103, 129, and also 71!! i need some good lgtbq+ book recs and am always open to suggestions :] 💜💜💜

hello hello!!!! :)

32: your favorite nonfiction novel

i don’t read much nonfiction, but of what i’ve read, Know My Name by Chanel Miller stands out from the rest. not only was it really emotionally impactful, but also really informative about the criminal justice system (and its many failures to protect victims of sa). very very heavy though, and look into trigger warnings going into it!

38: your favorite series

this is a very hard question. i can’t… i can’t narrow it down. i’ll share a few.

Inkheart: a childhood favorite that i still revisit often. characters come out of books. it’s magical :)

Six of Crows: this duology is so popular for a reason. they’re just amazing. amazing plot, characters that will stick with you forever, and every romance is perfect (there is a queer relationship in here!). there is scheming, heists, magic, found family, revenge.

In the Woods (Dublin Murder Squad): i’ve only read two of these so far, but they’re detective books! they really pull you in and make you feel disoriented in the best way. they just totally transport you somewhere else.

The Foxhole Court (All for the Game): it feels insane and ridiculous to include this book on this list, but this book series was all i thought about for a week as i read them, and i still think about them all the time, three years later??? they’re ridiculous, it’s about a made up sport and the mafia, it’s so outside of what i usually read, and yet i was captivated. and i’m not alone, there’s like a very small dedicated following to the series, it’s like a little cult classic. it’s self-published so they’re not extremely polished, but it’s not too bad at all. i got them all as ebooks for like $5, but i loved them so much, i bought them all in print too. a bunch of crazy stuff happens, definitely check tw if needed! there’s also an extreeeeeemely slow burn queer romance in here, but like, it’s slooow.

103: a book that deals with heavy topics

Neverworld Wake is one of my favorites. it’s kind of like dealing with grief in a limbo time loop.

Sadie was a devastating book, about big sister’s love for her little sister, and made me sob. check out trigger warnings as needed!

also, i don’t own this one, but My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell. this book isn’t for everyone, but it’s an exploration of csa and grooming from a teacher, with flashes forward to the narrator’s experience confronting what she thought to know to be true about that relationship within a 2017 context when that teacher has been accused of abuse. check out trigger warnings as needed.

129: a book with beautiful prose

The Strange and Beautiful Sorrows of Ava Lavender. beautiful but definitely check out trigger warnings!

71: your favorite LGBTQ+ fiction

i’m going to give you lots of recs bc it seems like you want a lot, and i have read a lot :)

In Other Lands: one of my favorite books of all time. silly YA fantasy, bi mc, amazing characters that stick with you.

Red, White & Royal Blue: goofy little son of the president x prince of england romance

Autoboyography: kinda insta-lovey, but explores a lot of IH and religious homophobia (love interest is mormon)

Charm Offensive: it’s like the BACHELOR, but he’s ANXIOUS, and he doesn’t fall for any of the CONTESTANTS, but rather a GUY CREW MEMBER with DEPRESSION. 5/5, amazing.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe: a classic!!! a couple teens figuring things out.

A Dowry of Blood: not my favorite, but it’s Dracula and his brides, it’s queer and poly.

Song of Achilles: a classic!!!! the fall of troy and everything that came before that.

Wolfsong: it’s a whole series about gay werewolves. what more can you ask for??

The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue: not my favorite, but fun. an adventure!!!

Every Heart a Doorway: first in a series of novellas, so much great rep. people find doors to other worlds that they slip into, but the story picks up once they’re back and homesick.

I’ll Give You the Sun: one of those like… early queer books that i read before i knew i was queer, but it made me feel so much at the time. permanently imprinted in my brain.

Fence: there are graphic novels, and then a couple novels. it’s fencing at a boarding school, and everyone is so so so gay. the novels are hilarious too, written by the same author as In Other Lands.

some books that i don’t own and didn’t love, but were pretty good: The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid, Only Mostly Devastated by Sophie Gonzales, Perfect on Paper by Sophie Gonzales (explores biphobia and attachment styles, which was really interesting!), History Is All You Left Me by Adam Silvera (oh my GOD this book made me sob, it’s so much heavy grief), She Drives Me Crazy by Kelly Quindlen (fake dating), Her Name in the Sky by Kelly Quindlen (wlw but a lot of IH and religious homophobia)

i’ve read more that were just so-so, and have a ton of unread queer books, so if you want more ideas, let me know! i have a lot more i can give you, just without my personal stamp of approval :)

book rec asks here!

[carlyraejepsans]

hey um, i don't have a second twt account to follow your nsfw account (and i kinda have to keep it that way) but still wanna be notified if you post stuff in there because i am legit interested in the topic in a normal way /gen. will you be making like, small announcements in other places? as in "look, i drew this! go here to check it out" or post cropped sfw versions in here/your main twt? just asking in case you do, pls don't feel obligated to do any of this hhh-

yep. tumblr still doesn't allow full on NSFW, even as art (i tried and got flagged immediately, lolol), but i made a little sideblog for text based/announcements when i post elsewhere instead! same url as my twitter. headsup, i think you have to look it up as [url].tumblr.com since i made it so it doesn't show up in searches.

actually, if you have asks on adult topics, make sure to send them over there instead! they're fun to discuss and theorize about, but i also want to keep this blog more sfw since it has so many followers.

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

MS Paint vs Clip Studio Paint

Anti-aliasing and layers are a godsend. I briefly used CSP in 2021 when I first tried my hand at drawing, but personal stuff got in the way so I stopped until recently. I've moved laptops since then, but I finally redownloaded CSP this month, and my old licensing code still worked, so I've gotten it up and running again!

I have a wacom tablet, but I can't figure out how to adjust the mapping so it feels right. No matter how much I tweak it, my wrist still hurts; if I make the drawing area really small, the cursor flies all over the screen wildly and it becomes unusable, but if I make it too big then I constantly have to shift where my hand is, and it feels unnatural. I've tried incrementally shrinking and growing the drawing area, but I still haven't found a setting that is right for me, which is doubly disappointing because I hit a sweet spot in 2021 which I am unable to replicate... For now I'm sticking with a mouse, which feels better in the short term, but it doesn't allow me to vary line thickness with pressure, and drawing long straight lines are next to impossible.

I still have a long way to go before I'll feel comfortable calling myself an illustrator, but I'm glad I finally picked things back up and am making new progress.

I made a sideblog for my OC, @13thgrotto, though I haven't posted anything there yet. I don't know how many of you guys are on twitter or if it's even worth it to link to my account, but if you want you can follow me there at the same handle, 13thGrotto. Having an OC is a real motivator because I no longer have to hem and haw over what I should draw, I can just draw him in whatever situation comes to mind. I'm rather fond of Grott, my little gargoyle guy.

[paper--moons]

Just a small announcement of sorts, but it is officially the two year anniversary of starting up my little agere sideblog here!

It doesn't feel like it's been two years (though my perception of time is notoriously bad haha), but I just wanted to use this time to reflect and thank all of my dear followers! The blog wouldn't be what it is without the lovely requests you all send in and the support you show. Really, it means so much to me. Through this blog, I've also been incredibly fortunate to make friends with many other talented agere creators that brighten my day. Not to mention it's because I decided to post my sillies that I met my dearest Honey! It's funny how one little decision to have a small corner online for myself has led to so much positivity in my life. Who would have predicted that?

So here's to hoping that another year with the blog continues to bring positivity (to myself as well as share that positivity with others). Thanks again for sticking around and making this so much fun!

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

hey this might be a really stupid question and i’m very sorry if it is but do reblogs still help if i have 0 followers? bc i havent been reblogging stuff bc i dont have any followers so i thought it didnt help anyway (i usually still like stuff)

if it does help i wanna start reblogging bc i wanna be helpful to the writers i like but i just dont know.

again sorry if this is stupid and thank you for your time you’re a very talented writer and i love your work:) much love<3

i do understand why you’re asking this, it’s not stupid at all. sure, if you currently don’t have any followers, then it might not do as much as if you had lots. but no matter how few or how many followers you have, it is still the best way for you to support writers on here. 

if you are concerned about gaining followers, then just the act of reblogging stuff can still be enough to attract some. now idk what your blog looks like, if it's completely empty or what, but i have a handful of secret sideblogs where i don’t make any original posts, just reblog things, and they still have more then 0, because just reblogging can still bring some attention to your blog and thereby maybe also some followers. I also know a lot of authors that block ghost blogs, so just be aware of that.

but the bottom line is that it is the best way to support people on here and if you wanna do it, then do it. but if you feel like your lack of reach to people is currently too small and thereby making your reblog seem pointless to you, if you really did enjoy it, then tell us that. add a comment, add your reaction, point out your favourite sentences or just add a funny reaction pic. there are so many ways to make an author feel your love, even just you popping in here on anon and generally saying that you enjoy my stuff. that means so so much. you don’t need a bunch of people who you can get to look at a thing you enjoyed to make the creator smile. I don't know a single author who doesn't have their gloomy day turn around at least a little bit by a reblog that is so clearly full of love, no matter who it is by. they have so much power, you have no idea. because yes it is amazing to boost and to help others find the good stuff, but if you add the sparkle on top? that always knocks our socks off.

[sharper-than-a-serpents-tooth]

Man, seeing your post (rightfully) criticizing the wmmap novel and Lee Jihye is bringing me back into my wmmap fixation. I'm the one who created the A Perfect Summer Storm AU— I had deleted the manhwa sideblog in a depressive episode bc I started feeling like I wasn't reaching anyone with it... I do rue the loss of my writing, though. That AU's ship game was a clusterfuck.

Claude/Felix, Diana/Felix, one-sided Claude/Diana, Felix/Anastacius probably it's been a while (Felix does finally snap and joins Ana's resistance faction after a while), Athykiel, Jen/OC, Lucas ending up raised by Jen and her husband and his love interest ends up being Athykiel's child, uhhhh who else is left, OH Diana and her... not-quite lover, almost sisterly figure, it's Complicated™, a fellow dancer in the same troupe as she was, who followed her into the Ruby Palace out of love.

I also ended up creating an entire family for Jen's love interest and... yeah that was the point where I started feeling down.

omg hi hi hello! *waves excitedly* 💕 I know your other blog too and missed you very much. 🥺 I was just redrawing the Athy panel you used to have as an icon as practice and had to think about you. Must be telepathy. A Perfect Summer Storm was probably the AU of all time that we have conceived ever. APSS, especially the Claufelidia love triangle in APSS has become part of my base AU that I often refer to in my headcanons. The ship game was truly crazy like A Midsummer Night's Dream, everyone was in love with everyone and no one. They were tormented by forbidden feelings for the person they could never have while being bound to the one that was ruining their life until one of them managed to break the cycle.

And Aiyla, Aiyla, Aiyla *sights* ...Aiyla is the character that I imprinted on immediately (Anis was my second fave ^^ I wish to learn more about Sindria and the royal foster system one day). I needed a mean lesbian that talks shit about Claude and gets away with it while also being hopelessly in love with Diana so deeply it temporary steals away her ability to think rationally and alert her to danger. (What if it's just her jealousy talking? What if she's seeing red flags where there are none, because she secretly wants to break up their relationship and keep Diana to herself? What if Diana will think that Aiyla does it because she misses being the dominant one and wants to bring their master/servant role back and starts hating her? What if she was right? For the first time in her life Aiyla is scared to speak up her mind. She finds the thought of Diana hating her unbearable. If Diana loves him, he can't be that bad, can he?). Aiyla is the Claude to Diana's Felix but she makes a noble sacrifice and in doing so she wins the battle against her own selfishness, yet she ends up alone anyway. I ask myself what her fatal flaw was.

What does she look like? Do you have a color palette for her? (I picture her with long straight black hair that goes to her waist, darker skin than Diana's, maybe smaller than Diana and wearing dresses the colours of the sun. orange and warm yellow. In my head she doesn't wear much extravagant jewelry. She prefers to wear many small pieces of chains, piercings and rings on her body over one tiara with a giant diamond in the middle and that's why Diana is often confused as the princess of Siodonna when they are outside the palace. She's modest wheras Diana is flashy, bright and loves big sparkly gem stones. Diana tends to wear a little bit too much decorations but on her it doesn't look too much.) I kinda wanna draw her now.

I'm up for a wmmap renaissance anytime if you're up for it. ☀️

[posholnakhui]

A Pain in the Ass

Fire burned through his legs. 

Every jump was agony. Every sit-spin, torture. But he’d worked through pain before and the desperate ache in his lungs that preceded tears only made him work harder to pretend he wasn’t hurting. 

It showed in the quality of his performance, though, and he heard more yelling from Yakov than he had since he turned 13 and hit the Junior’s international competitive bracket. The anger fueled him through the end, but as soon as it was over, gasping for breath in an effort to keep himself from breaking down where anybody could see, he ripped his skates off and threw them into the bag without the usual cleaning and preparations. 

He zipped his bag closed and on legs that felt like jelly, staggered to the locker rooms, found himself an empty shower stall and - still fully clothed - collapsed against the tile walls, pulled the curtain closed and cried. 

Tears streaming down his cheeks in rivers. Hands desperately working at the muscles of his legs.  The pain was excruciating. Unbearable.

He’d thought he was past all this.  He thought it was over. 

But here it was again - bringing with it a promise of months of sleepless nights and practices that would leave him ... HIM! ... in tears by the end of the day. And an even more sinister promise of ruining everything he’d learned up to this point. 

He hated it. Hated everything about it. But there was nothing he could do, besides try and tough it out.

He knew with aching clarity what someone meant when they said in movies “There are fates worse than dying.”  and “Death would be more merciful.” 

[angelbaby-fics]

💕💕💕welcome!!💕💕💕

i’m chloe🎀!! welcome to my sideblog for agere & fanfics!! 💕 my main blog is @angelbabydoll28 and i follow & like from there!!!

rules: no nsfw!!! i have the right to refuse any request. please be patient with me, i am neurodivergent!!! be nice or your ask will be deleted!!!!! 💕

feel free to block if anything here makes you uncomfortable! i wont be upset, i just want everyone to be safe & happy ‼️

anons: 🐸 / 💗🧸 / 💙 / ♡ / 💕 / 🐣 / 🩰

Follow and turn on post notifications for the @angelbaby-library to be alerted every time I post a new fic!

take the reader survey!

send me a tip!

masterlist & au guidelines under the cut! happy reading!

Personal AU: Littles are common & accepted in society. Specialty shops and events exist for littles and their caregivers, as well many celebrities and high profile politicians are caregivers for a little or two. I like to imagine the Avengers all living at the compound together but I don’t always specify that in my fics!

All fics are tagged #chloe's fic if you'd like to see them all in one place!

Chloe's Halloween Party Eddie Munson Power Hour Chloe's Tea Party Chloe's Birthday Picnic

Bucky:

Like A Prince - Bucky get his hair cut and you can’t stop staring  Hair Salon - Reader accidentally cuts Bucky's long hair! Brave Little Kiddo - Movie night with Bucky gets a little too scary Daddy's Protector - Daddy always protects you... but who protects Daddy? Icy Road - Bucky's always careful when he's driving precious cargo, but one night he gets distracted Headcanon - Reader misses Bucky while he's away on a mission Headcanon - Bucky helps the reader while they're sick Headcanon - Playing Animal Crossing with Bucky Headcanon - Bucky accidentally drops reader

Steve:

Cuddles Cure Everything - Reader is sick but luckily Steve is there to cuddle all the bad feelings away “Sooo Pretty” - You wake up before Steve and can’t help but admire him Butterfly - Steve finally comes home after being injected with the serum, and you're not too sure about his new appearance No Matter What - You ask Steve the age old question: "Would you still love me if I were a worm?"

Stucky:

No Pink - Bucky & Steve try to dress their little in something other than pink for once Pretty Baby (No Pink pt. 2) - Reader shows off her outfit at Bucky’s party Like E.T.? - Steve & Bucky teach their little how to ride a bike FaceTime - You call Steve while he’s away on a mission Daddy Cat - Bucky loses your favorite stuffy, but Steve has a plan Strong - Your daddies comfort you before & after surgery Presents & Princes - You get mud on your new Valentine’s dress Sleepyhead - Reader is still tired in the morning Birthday Cake - Steve forgot to order your birthday cake in time! Rough Day - Reader has a bad day & doubts being a little Overload - Reader has a meltdown caused by sensory overload Steeb / JAMES!!! - You call your daddies by their real names! The Party - You don't wanna party, you just wanna cuddle with daddy Fashion Show Friends - You make some new super friends and dress them up! Bucky's Special Day - You and Steve dote on Bucky for no reason in particular Crime And Punishment - You misbehave at the store and have to face some consequences Birthday Pie - You don't always look forward to your birthdays, but Steve and Bucky might be able to change that! Safe Room - Mob!Daddies Stucky accidentally bring some dangerous work home with them Daddy's Baby Day - 40s Steve tries regressing with you Chocolate Trouble - Reader eats too many sweets and starts to have heart palpitations Too Little For Words - Reader gets an owie but is too small to tell daddies Don't Bite - An encounter with Alpine doesn't end well Attached At The Hip - Bucky's arms are by far the best nap spot Halloween Decorations - You get obsessed with a silly spooky animatronic Sick Day - Baby gets sick and has to be pampered Christmas Lights - Steve and Bucky set up a surprise while you're out looking at lights Masterpiece - Steve isn't around, so Bucky is your drawing buddy for the day Zoo Adventure - You get into some hijinks at the zoo Naptime With Daddies - You can't help but fall asleep when you feel so safe Headcanon - Reader gets obsessed with nail polish Headcanon - Stucky's little loves bathtime

Stucky + Little!Peter:

Rainy Day - A rainy day at home with Steve, Bucky, Peter, Alpine, and you Dance With Me - A lazy afternoon with Steve, Bucky, Peter, and you Proud Of You - Big brother Peter comforts you when daddies are away Comfort - You're too tiny to be alone... Paci Kisses - You love to give paci kisses! Baby's Bodyguard - Peter can get a little overprotective of his baby sibling! Daycare Dilemma - When you get sick at the daycare center, Peter is first to notice

Loki:

Stars - Reader can't fall asleep without Loki's magic Headcanon - Cuddling with Loki (pt. 2)

Eddie Munson:

Eddie My Love - Sweet moments with your darling Eddie Pretty Kitty - Are you a kitty? Because Eddie's pretty sure you're a little kitty! Christmas Music - Eddie teaches himself a Christmas song for you Headcanon - Bedtime with Eddie Headcanon - Walks with Eddie Headcanon - Beach Day with Eddie

Steve Harrington:

Safe Haven - Whenever you need him, you know you can always run to Steve

Ransom Drysdale:

Pancake Breakfast - Ransom tries to surprise you one rainy morning Chosen Family - Ransom's family is awful, you're his shining light The Dentist - Ransom always makes sure you never have anything to worry about Sweater Weather - Ransom shrinks his best sweater! Daddy's Day Off - Ransom takes the day off to spend it with you

Lee Bodecker:

Perfect Daddy - Lee feels a bit self conscious, but you don't let that last long Winter Wonderland - It snows on your little country home

Lloyd Hansen:

Mustache - Lloyd picks up a present for you on his latest mission

[underestimated-heroine]

I blocked a radfem who followed me (their username was literally like 'radicalfeminist' with numbers after it or something) and they then messaged me from a sideblog about how I "prove I don't actually care about 'trans ideology' because if I did I would allow radfems to follow me so they might be convinced." They also said something like "what else could I expect from someone who threatens to kill themselves if they're called 'he/him'" which was genuinely just funny. Because that...just never happened? I don't share details about my gender & sexuality on here & very likely never will, but that's whatever. my personal life aside, it just is a fake story which never happened. Not that it would be an indictment on me if I had.

Funnily enough, ever since I made this shaggy meme pic my pfp as "underestimated-heroine" a lot more transphobes have assumed I'm trans and attempted to disrespect pronouns I've never shared. To me, this phenomenon showcases the idiocy of the "radical feminist" mindset in a small yet entertaining and poignant way. They see "heroine" next to a famous meme which happens to have facial hair (on a site where often anonymous users literally gender themselves however the fuck they want moment-to-moment in an act of genuinely inspiring collective rebellion). And without any further investigation, their Weird Sad Koolaid-poisoned neurons begin wailing about how Heroine Shaggy oppresses them on the basis of (presumably) being born with a cartoon cylinder instead of a cartoon hole, but I digress.

When people unfollow me, I generally don't take it personally unless I can pinpoint something I've reblogged or said to inspire people to unfollow me. In which case, I accept that we've reached an impasse and take my own direction, or reflect on my own actions and try to do better. Not so, for those who are pitter-pattering their stupid little fucking feet around on the surface of fascist rhetoric quicksand.

I'm starting to get what those people I always thought were annoying mean when they say they feel bad for hateful people, because I can't fathom the amount of work it will take to unlearn the entitlement necessary to believe someone choosing not to engage with you online is an act of oppression. When I find out that one of the many bigots on this site blocked me, I'm sad to discover they're a bigot, but ultimately glad there's no chance we'll interact anymore. Even if they're not a bigot and it's for no seemingly discernable reason in regards to ideology/politics, I respect when someone else blocks or unfollows me because they are not obligated to engage with me or my energy. I am not owed anything by them. Maybe they just don't want any more followers, maybe they don't like one of my interests. It doesn't matter because ultimately, that's their choice. They don't even owe me an explanation. Why would they? We are strangers online.

Not so, in the minds of bigots. No. Unless they are being targeted from every direction, they're not being seen. If someone born with features that differ from theirs can relate to their struggle, they whine and scream about how their identity is being appropriated because they don't think their identity as the member of an oppressed group affords them the right to demand justice and equality; they think it affords them the right to demand reign.

Anyways, don't learn this lesson the hard way like i've had to: don't interact with bigots. you cannot pry the fingers of the willfully blind from their eyes. Report hate speech and block them. Block their side accounts, too. You can only rarely thrash people who derive the vast majority of their dopamine supplies from feeling like the specialest, uniquest little victims in any way that matters. Instead, we win when we turn our backs. Generally speaking, we can only starve them out. In a way, that's good news for us: our best option is to keep our eyes on the light and forget them.

(And beware overindulging in paranoid interpretation lest you help push vulnerable people towards these hateful ideologies.)

The self-centeredness of people who have handed their braincells over to hateful ideology boggles the mind.

[pineapplefulfillseveryneed]

🎶✨️ when u get this u have to put 5 songs u actually listen to, publish, then send this to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool) ✨🎶

@parts-of-me-unravelling tagged me on my sideblog (thank you very much!) and I decided to post it here as people here will know I listen to Sparks so I don't have to torture myself picking a very small amount of Sparks songs. (Still took me over an hour to pick 5 songs though.) I'm going to add youtube videos below the cut for who wants to hear the songs.

Georgy Sviridov - Snowstorm

Janelle Monáe - 57821 (ft. Deep Cotton)

Klaus Nomi - Falling In Love Again

Saori Yuki - Yoake No Scat

Yello - Who's Gone

Everyone I'd tag has already been tagged as far as I know but whoever wants to do this may consider themselves tagged by me :)

Georgy Sviridov - Snowstorm

2. Janelle Monáe - 57821 (ft. Deep Cotton) absolutely recommend all of her work, but especially The ArchAndroid because who doesn't love pop meets classical meets sci-fi

3. Klaus Nomi - Falling In Love Again another absolute superhero, if you look for more of his work: new wave sci-fi opera

4. Saori Yuki - Yoake No Scat learned about this song through the soundtrack for Utena (many songs in there actually feel rather Sparks-universe - not this one though)

5. Yello - Who's Gone

And a little bonus for those who have made it all the way here... >:)

[muggle-writes]

Rules: Answer 21 questions and then tag 21 people who you want to get to know better.

tagged by @elizabethsyson

Nickname: Muggle is my nickname, but when I went by Muggle in person for more than a month at a time, it naturally got abbreviated, usually to Mugz

Zodiac: Aquarius

Last movie I saw: into the spiderverse (same answer as last time. I don't watch that many movies tbh except around Christmas. unless YouTube counts in which case... music of some sort? idk links for the next answer)

Favorite musician: changes by the day. I've kinda been in an acapella and/or folk music mood recently so the Maccabeats and Peter Hollens are in my YouTube and Spotify history a lot recently. also I'm eternally in awe of Forte Handbell Quartet (eta a longer video; i recommend skipping to the techno piece or the Jurassic Park theme)

Last thing I googled: "vine why are you buying clothes at the soup store" (my wife hasn't seen it; also i can't find the vine because apparently it's a much bigger meme than I realized). before that it was "chgrp not root" because work and group permissions are useful when they work

Song stuck in my head: well for most of the day when I haven't been actively listening to something, it's been the Pokemon RSE route-walking music. (but that somehow happens frequently when I'm in the no-music-no-internet room at work, as I was for most of the day, and I don't know how I accidentally trained my brain to make that connection). right now, surprisingly, I don't have any background music playing in my head. I think it's because the humidifier provides just enough white noise that my brain doesn't feel the need to provide its own

Other blogs: my main is @muggle-the-hat and I'm a mod on @why-do-neurotypicals but we've gotten one ask ever so that blog has been dormant for a while. I have a bunch of other sideblogs, but they're all small and I use different screen names on each of them (enby life: no idea which name suits me best so I may as well try them out) so i feel like it would just confuse things to link them.

Following: blogs matching all the themes of my sideblogs, (including this one, which is writeblr), korean langblr, jumblr, assorted fandom blogs, authors of my more favorite fanfictions (some overlap with other categories), and irl friends and acquaintances (including one fandom blog turned irl friend)

Do I get asks: on my main if at all, which isn't really surprising because i have hundreds of followers there and maybe 60 followers combined among the rest. but I get asks far less often than I reblog ask memes so... I'm always happy to get more. I do get tagged in ask games more on this one, but writeblr is actually vaguely organized about tag lists so that makes sense. also I used to get tagged a bunch on my main and I rarely could find the posts again to follow up when I had time to answer.

What I’m Wearing: pajamas. staying warm and cozy

Lucky number: I don't remember what I said last time, but I like a lot of numbers. 64 is a good number. recently I've been debugging software in which 0x3E is my lucky status number and 0x0E taunts me. (um, decimal 62 and 14). Also my other favorite number i can't share until it's no longer the combination to the lock to the Secret Room. (or realistically never because opsec and i shouldn't make public the types of parents we use for that combination lock), honestly I aim to be like.... ah, I'm sure the anecdote involves G.H. Hardy but i don't remember on which side. anyway one mathematician remarked to another about how the id number of the taxi he rode in was sadly uninteresting, and the one I aspire to be like, argued "what are you talking about, this number is interesting because ______" and I'd like to be able to do that for any arbitrary number thrown at me. (hi yes math is good, history is hard, math history is interesting yet i still forget the people even if i remember the math. except when things are named after people, but that tends to be, like, Euler and LaGrange and other people who did lots of cool science things so i remember the methods and the names of the methods separately which never helps)

Amount of sleep: ....depression both screws with my sleep schedule and means I always feel like I need more sleep except when I wake up at 5pm and feel like I've wasted the day. so yeah. I can never get enough sleep

Favorite food: yes (why do I have to pick a favorite?) uh, chocolate in most forms, many other sweet things, red meats (especially if served with potatoes), curry (especially if it has "too much" ginger), fresh-baked bread, chai the way my favorite local Indian restaurant makes it (spicier with just a little bit of sweet, which is the opposite of what i can get from the mocha machine at work which is wayyy sweet with a hint of spice but that inferior chai is still superior to coffee so i drink too much of it). also vegetables which I really don't eat enough of: sauteed zucchini and onions, roasted broccoli

Dream trip: dreaming requires creativity and tbh I funnel that mostly into my writing instead. I wouldn't mind going back to Korea for another visit though

Dream job: my current job is pretty good when I feel productive and when my debugging tools actually produce data maybe??? (they were not being helpful today. but i still mostly like my job.) dream job is probably this but with seniority and confidence and double the salary (while living in a similar area of the country; I wouldn't want to double my salary by moving to work for Google in California and having less available after rent than I do now)

Describe yourself as aesthetic things:

the smell of old books

the first glow of sunrise (the sunrise painting the mountains pink and gold)

a rainbow in the spray from a waterfall

the flicker of distant lightning (watching a thunderstorm fade into the distance)

this picture

Random fact: about me or about the world?

how about a combination answer: when we got our new handbell music this season, we only looked at half the pieces our first rehearsal and afterwards I tried to look up one of the pieces we hadn't gotten to on YouTube because it's got a weird time signature and I wanted to get a feel for how fast it would go and how strict the counting is...... except it turns out we're the first group to ever play the piece. it was commissioned recently but seeing my conductor's name on the page didn't tell me how new it was because he's super prolific. (the fact that it was on printer paper without the publisher's graphics should have been a giveaway but it's only the second time I've been among the first to play one of his pieces so I think I can be excused for not realizing)

Languages: mostly just English, but I took Spanish for years, so I can hold simple conversations in it. I can almost read sound out Hebrew fast enough to keep up in services, and I know some random Hebrew vocab but comparatively no grammar. and I took Korean in college, enough that I can recognize sentence structure but I can really only speak tourist-Korean, though I can sound anything out (if it's typed. handwriting is hit or miss.) in both Hebrew and Korean (and Spanish tbh but i don't often listen to Spanish music) I'm very proud when I can separate the words enough, listening to a song, to translate them without looking up the lyrics. also I tried to learn Japanese from Duolingo when it was new, but I still hadn't gotten the kana straight when it started progressing to kanji so that was a rough time and I went back to Hebrew.

tbh I "dabble" in "language learning" which really means I start a million courses on Duo and stick with none of them. with the notable exception of French, which I acknowledge is super common and probably a good idea to learn but the spelling and pronunciation seem so arbitrary I'm scared to look close enough to learn it properly, and I've never particularly considered starting the Duolingo course for French

I think I lost a few questions, because that's only 18 answers. whoops.

um... who to tag

@abluescarfonwaston if school hasn't drowned you in work yet and @copperscales I'm interested in both of your choices for lucky numbers especially.

... wow I'm blanking on other mutuals I haven't tagged recently. as usual lmk if you'd like to be edited in, or just answer the questions and tag me back, that's great too.

[pizzadragons]

ok i saw other posts like this on my dash already but i'd like to rephrase them to make them a litte more uh, constructive.

anyway, if you're new here (welcome!) then you might have seen some posts telling you to reblog original works instead of simply liking them. but why? and why's everyone so adamant about it?

let's say i post art on instagram. now if you want to show me you like the artwork AND want to help me spread it beyond my circle of followers you do one thing: you like it. the more people like it, the more it gets recommended by the algorithm. i don't have to do anything about it and you don't have to do anything either. the overall engagement contributes to how many people will see that artwork, even if they don't follow me. and that in turn makes me want to make more art because i know that it will be seen by many people.

now i post art on tumblr. if you were to do the same thing you did on instagram and only liked the artwork, it would do nothing to spread it beyond my circle of followers. it appears on your dash because you follow me, but if you click like it won't appear on your blog and therefore won't be shown to anyone who follows you, and in turn noone else can discover my art. liking something on tumblr is more of a "favorites" function, where it saves posts for your own reference. this is because tumblr doesn't really have an algorithm like instagram. it relies on people sharing posts around to their friends instead of an algorithm which guesses what you might want to see. this means that artwork on tumblr will only be shown to more people if others reblog it, and i might stop sharing my art on tumblr if noone is going to see it anyway.

so if you like a creator's work but don't reblog it, their work will not be seen by others. getting only one or two reblogs is the equivalent of getting only a like or two on instagram.

(a sort of working comparison would be if someone you know told you they had a small concert in your town, and you'd go to see them but never tell your friends about it. and so word never gets out about the concert and in the end only you and a handful of other people are there to see them play instead of a full house. and then they might quit altogether because noone will be at their gigs anyway)

so. ok. you get it. reblogs are the thing to do. but what if i don't WANT to share this specific thing, actually?

i mean, you do you. noone can force you to do something you don't want to do. but i hope this explanation helped you understand why creators on this platform are so adamant about reblogs.

if you don't want to have certain reblogs on your main blog because you have an aesthetic but still want to help creators then you can also make a sideblog and share their works there. you don't even need to tag anything if it's not your jam!

and just to close out this essay i want to say that i know how weird and daunting it can be to share things on your dash when you're not used to it. when i returned to tumblr after a longer hiatus i exclusively liked stuff because i didn't want others to judge me by the stuff i had on my dash. i get it. and if you really don't want to reblog i'm not telling you to. the website won't fall into utter disrepair just because a blog or two don't reblog every artwork they see. but if you DO want to share something so it gets more exposure, please consider doing it! it really helps creators out :)

(on a sidenote i personally think that it's also kind of confusing that tumblr has a feature that superficially resembles features on instagram and twitter when it has a different function. i get why it is that way but like, what if they called it favorites for example, and made it a little star instead of a heart. i think that would actually make it a lot clearer. but then again i'm not a UI/UX designer so i don't know shit about shit)