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callmeherry · 2 days ago

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Underlust reimagined

Tw: SA; Drug abuse; Child abuse; Violence; Suicide and attemped suicide; Misogyny and miscarriage. None of the topics will be discussed in detail and it will be needed to read between the lines to see them.

Intended for MATURE AUDIENCES

So, as many may know, Underlust was pretty much a +18 au for drawing nsfw of the characters, which there is nothing wrong exactly, BUT I actually think there was a lot of potential for this au that was just… Not used.

In my reimagined I intend to keep SOME elements but most of the stuff will be rewritten or just full on discarded.

Be mindful of the trigger warnings! I don't intend to go in depth on any of them but there will be mentions.

Anyway! Let 's begin!

Frisk:

Frisk is the protagonist of this story. They are 20 years old and was born with partial blindness, being able to see mostly blurry images when things are farther apart. Frisk grew up in an orphanage as their mom died at birth, their father fleeing once he heard. They were very much isolated from the other kids, mostly just reading alone as it was difficult to play with the others with their poor vision. That was, until they met Chara. The both of them quickly became friends. Chara always encouraged Frisk to not care that the others didn't want to hang out with them, they are better off without them. It was clear to both that they were soulmates, what kind it didn't matter to them. As long as they were together they were unstoppable… … When Frisk was 17, Chara took their own life. Frisk could never understand why. What happened? How could they not notice? If they noticed, maybe they could have done SOMETHING… But they didn't… They kept living, but the guilty never left them. They left the orphanage at 18, but life just got harder. All they could think about is how they weren't supposed to be doing this alone. So maybe… Would it be better to just follow their partner? Frisk climbed the mountain many said it was the end of any and all hope. And right when their body ached and they found the opening, they let all the weight of their body leave them, falling into the unknown. But instead of meeting their doom, they are saved by a tiny rose named Rosie. He helps them get up and when he learned about their poor sight made worse by the dim light, he latched himself on their shoulder to guide them through the catacombs. And so, our story officially begins. Frisk will start meeting every single one of the cast, and having in mind the guilt that followed them by not being able to save Chara, Frisk will do anything in their power to help them deal with their problems. While maybe, learning to deal with their own demons in the process…

And that's it for our protagonist! I think you guys can already tell the new direction this version of the story would take ^^

So before I tell you guys about the other character, I need to explain to you guys a bit of world building I've thought of!

World building:

The year is 20xx. Monsters have been trapped for thousands of years and hope has been glowing dimmer as time goes on. As so the children have been getting each passing day more and more rare. The king and the council would do their best to guide the kingdom, but after the death of the king's newborn he has fallen deep into a depression, being unable to actually make any calls. Leaving all the power to the council to call all the shots. The council, however, didn't quite have the people's best interest. Problems kept arising and each time with less and less answers. The council knew that if they wanted to stay with the power, they needed the population to focus on something else. And what better than a common enemy? They hit the most sensitive spot of the monsters, the lack of children. The biggest mystery they had without an answer, well, up until now. The council created a false answer, faking studies and data thanks to one of the members who happened to be the royal scientist, saying that the reason the monsters had such a low birth rate was because of monsters borns from two same gendered parents. They said, each time a monster was born from two monsters of the same gender, the offspring had a lower chance of giving birth. And generation and generation of this, piling up. The monsters got where they are now. The population was horrified, the lie was set. The council watched as they created an enemy the population could hate, and it wasn't them. Same gender pairs were fine just as long it was a fling, but couples were frown upon. The monsters already have such a lack of children! How could you have a partner with the same gender as you? Are you trying to have an offspring with even less of a chance of having future babies?? The underground kept growing and expanding, everything got more and more expensive and the monsters suffered. Everyday, madness and corruption invaded their souls, making them just a spitting image of the ones once were their enemies. Each day, they got more human.

Now that you all understand the world they live in, we can go over the rest of the characters ^^

Toriel:

Toriel, the queen of the underground. She once was one of the fiercest warriors known, not because of her attacks but because of the way she inspired all monsters. That was, until she gave birth to her kid, only for them to turn to dust in her arms. She felt like she failed everyone, not only her family, but her kingdom as well. She failed to give them an heir. She failed to give them hope of a future. The queen left the castle, too ashamed and hurt to continue with such responsibility. She moved to the ruins and opened a humble abode, where she would teach other mothers how to take care of their children. Helping them keep the most precious thing she lost. When Frisk meets her, their goal will be to help her understand that she is more than this horrible loss, and even though being a mother is amazing, she is still first and foremost a person. A person who also deserves love. Once they understand each other, Toriel explains to Frisk the rules of the world and gives them a striped shirt. Most monsters don't know what a human is but all monsters know that someone wearing a striped shirt is a kid. And children are extremely precious to all monsters. So Toriel hopes this will keep them safe.

Undyne:

Undyne is a soldier from the royal guard, she has been training to get in since she was little once she heard the horrible stories she heard about the war, wanting to make a difference. Unfortunately for her, the task was difficult. No matter how much she worked, how much effort she put into being better, her peers looked down at her. And now, a random skeleton comes from Snowding and suddenly he's the “talented prodigy” and the next big promise to make it to captain of the royal guard? Fuck no. So she works even harder than before, she needs to be the toughest soldier from the royal guard. She has to not show any defect. But that is difficult when on top of everything, she found herself taking a liking to the short yellow lizard who happens to be the royal scientist… She knows how frowned that would be. So she pushes these feelings aside… When Frisk meets her, they will help her see that she shouldn't hide any part of her because of others. That her feelings and not being strong all the time is what makes her… Her… Undyne will finally find someone she can open up to, be honest about her frustration and fears and not get judged because of it. A friend…

Alphys:

Alphys became the royal scientist a long time after the other one pretty much disappeared. No one knows what happened to him, he just never showed up again and it's as if no one wants to talk about him anymore. Either way, the position was open, and it stayed open for many years, only having a few occupants who didn't last long. Well, Alphys got the job! And she thinks she knows why no one wants to stay, as it is a lot of responsibility and a small pay grade… Which is odd… As she is pretty sure the previous scientist was well off… Anyway, the important thing is that SHE wasn't. It wasn't bad in any way, it was actually ok… But she felt small, not really appreciated monetarily nor socially. That is, until she received a proposition from a raggedy cat who also wanted a better life. He explained that they could team up, as the medicine Alphys can produce would be very appropriated by other kinds of people. Alphys knew it was wrong. And she refused, at first at least… Soon temptation became too much to avoid. Oh how she wished she had enough money for this nice shirt, oh how she wished she could have one of those fancy cars, oh how she wished she could go to this five star restaurant… “Just one time” She said. And then she wouldn't sell anything else. One time… Two times… Three times… She lost count by now. The guilt slowly faded away as she just got a nicer life. Yeah, she still hid it was her, the producer of the biggest dealer in hometown but she didn't care. She felt like she was finally doing something big! That is, until the numbers of deaths by overdose slowly start to rise among monsters. At first, she tried to ignore it. But as the numbers started to rise she just couldn't deny it anymore. It was her fault. She caused this. She IS causing it. And as much as she wanted to stop she just… Can't. She is just in too deep now, she can't stop. Yet she cries every night, telling herself how much of a bad person she is. This is all her fault. She hurts people. When Frisk meets her, they will help her see that there is still hope for her. That even though she did a bad thing she can still change! She can be a good person, if she just tries… They believe in her, maybe she can believe in herself, too…

Mettaton:

Mettaton’s story is pretty much the same as the canon Underlust. The hopeful ghost meets the royal scientist in the dump one day and she promises him a body. Mettaton becomes a star among monsters. But with light, darkness surrounds… The star was desired by those who watched him, but desire can become dangerous. A poison of entitlement and arrogance. So they took what they believed was their right. They broke the star… Mettaton was never the same after that. He asked Alphys to make his robot body less revealing, he hid himself from everyone, he could never look at himself in the mirror again. He knew what people said about him. How it was his fault that happened. That he was the one that showed himself and made them desire, and some days… He thought that they were right… Mettaton did his best to continue his show, to continue his dream. But was it really worth it? Sometimes he thought that wasn't the case… So every time he received those flowers, those cards, he cried. Hugging them close to his chest. Frisk knew from their skeleton friend the robot's story, and encouraged him to meet Mettaton. It was a slow process, a scary one, even. Mettaton was already so hurt, it was hard to believe the two of them were genuine. But Frisk helped him see that there were still good people in this underground. People that care about him. So he does his best to still have hope, him and the skeleton start hanging out more and more and even form a kind of partnership. It is still scary… Mettaton isn't sure if it will ever not be… But he has hope things will get better.

Papyrus & Sans:

The two brothers were sons of the previous royal scientist, W.D. Gaster. They were the result of an experiment to try and make children, unfortunately, Gaster deemed the experiment as too unstable and simply not worth the trouble. Either way, Sans and his younger brother were born from that. Any good parent would never say they have a favorite child, Gaster however, is not a good parent. He made it clear how much he believed his older son to be a failure, all stats measured as one… Now, Papyrus… Gaster had big dreams for Papyrus. It soon became obvious that the scientist would pour all his expectations and hopes into Papyrus while the older brother got all his frustrations and regrets. Papyrus was quickly put in training to become a royal guard, having taken special care so he would grow up to be a strong monster. And the younger brother took that to heart even after their father was gone. He trained and did his best, and suddenly everyone was counting on him. Even his brother. Sans more than anyone encouraged Papyrus, saying how it was obvious he would be the one to become leader of the royal guard. But Papyrus never wanted that… He never got the chance to choose what he wanted to be. His father was the one that told him he would be a soldier and then his brother encouraged him. And Papyrus just doesn't have the heart to tell his brother the truth… And even if he did… He still knows that being a soldier is the best way he can guarantee his brother is safe… To compensate for when they were children… And Papyrus couldn't protect him. Sans was very different when he was a kid, it is to be expected when one suffers so much on the hand of the one that was supposed to protect him. Yet despite everything he would smile at his brother and tell him everything would be ok. Papyrus remembers his brother looking at the clock and noticing the time. He was late… That was never good. He remembers Sans taking his hand and guiding him to his bedroom, helping Papyrus set into his bed, telling the younger one a bedtime story. He remembers both of them tense and scared. Sans patted his head, clinking their skulls together in a good night kiss. He remembers his brother pleading with Papyrus to promise to only open the door when Sans comes to get him. Papyrus promises, like he does every night. And he knows he will regret it in the morning. Sans smiles, getting up and walking towards the door, closing it behind him and locking it up. The key being slided from under the door so only Papyrus can get it… … He wishes he didn't remember the sounds every time he goes to bed… So Papyrus protects his brother. He trains. He gets stronger. And one day, he will make up to him, he will be able to tell him he is sorry for everything… Sans was very different when he was a kid. Quiet, weak, always wearing hoodies. He needed to, his father demanded him to hide the marks of hits he himself left on his bones. Sans always thought it would be easier to just not hit him but oh well… No matter what he did, it seemed like nothing was enough. And he never told anyone. Because he was scared. Every goddamn night he came late Sans just wished he didn't come home at all… It was never the case though…

Some nights he just got yelled at, while others… He is broken down to his core, left alone to pick up the pieces… He could never understand how his own father could do such things, but as he himself said, Sans was just property. He was just meant for that. To be used and someday he will be discarted… One day, he got too scared as he heard the door open. The thought of the many hands, digging, staining his bones. He just couldn't. So he ran to his only friend. But the next day, he knew he had messed up, he had left Papyrus alone with him. So he went back, and for the first time, his father welcomed him with warmth in his voice. “I knew you would be back…” He whispered in his ear. … Next time Papyrus wasn't home. Sans paid the price for what he did… But this time, it was too much for him to handle when he came back to his own body. He broke down in front of a teacher, told her everything. He wished he didn't. Gaster took him to the lab one day, told he had found out, and told Sans… His teacher's dust was in his hands. And now, he would join her. When Sans felt his neck vertebrates being squeezed and twisted, close to snapping. He snapped instead. The next thing he remembers is the door opening, the king Asgore looking at his crying form and a pile of dust in front of him. So, Sans decided to live his life differently when he grew up. He wore whatever he wanted, he was loud, flirted. He wanted to be perceived, he knew the way he acted made him desirable, enough to make people of the bar he attended to make a bet to see whoever could “score him”. And he just didn't. Care. Because now, he was strong enough to be able to deny them, and to hurt them if he wanted. Everytime he told someone off it was… Cathartic… He doesn't care that he's putting himself in dangerous situations on purpose. He doesn't care about the names people gave him. He would continue partying and drinking and taking as many pills as it takes to maybe, just maybe the voices in his ear telling him that his father was right about him will finally shut up. Well, whenever Frisk comes around, they will help Papyrus to be true to himself, help him see that as honorable and genuine his reasons are, he can't allow himself to suffer just for the sake of others. He is stronger when he is happy with himself, not when he is miserable. While with Sans… Well, he is just not ready to start any healing process, and Frisk doesn't push him. But he does appreciate them helping his brother, thanking them to help him see how much strain Papyrus was putting on himself.

Grillby:

Grillby is the owner of a very famous club in Snowding. He spent his whole life watching people around him destroy themselves and just not listening to him when he tried to help. And things just get worse when he develops feelings for his favorite patreon and best friend. He does his best to protect him, but he knows he can't. Grillby never fully committed, he was never fully truthful with himself. The fire elemental would put on a mask, showing everyone how sturdy and capable he was, but he knows it isn't true. But he also feels he is incapable of doing anything. How could just one monster change anything in this world? It's impossible. So he just sits back from behind the bar, watching and never interacting. Frisk however, helps him see that is not true, yes, one monster can't change the world, but he doesn't need to. If he is able to change a single thing, as small as it is, it will all be worth it.

Asgore:

The king consumed by grief and guilt. He is unable to rule, unable to do anything. That is, until he found that small skeleton, shaking and scared. Once the king found out the horrible things his previous scientist did he was enraged. After a long time he finally made all remember why he was the king. W.D. Gaster is to be forgotten. His name erased from their history, left to rot on his insignificance. Obviously, the other members of the council didn't understand, they questioned him, where even was the scientist anyway? But the king was firm. And soon, they learned not to question. Asgore adopted the young skeleton, together with his younger brother. He did his best to accommodate them despite everything. Even if he felt inadequate to be any kind of father figure… It was a hard process, both kids were fragile, especially the older one, but he did his best. And they both grew up. Once they were old enough to leave, they did. They still call him from time to time, his older one visiting him frequently thanks to his “shortcuts”, and he couldn't love them more… But he knew deep down they weren't really his kids… His kid died at birth… Asgore he… The skeletons didn't come from his soul… They are not truly his, and he could never truly be their father... Right? And now, after everything, they have word that a human has fallen into the underground. The council want to use their soul so king Asgore could have an actual heir. A being half human and half monster, the most powerful being that has ever been seen, perhaps strong enough to break the barrier keeping them underground. And the king is conflicted, he is supposed to do what is best for his people, and a monarch would bring hope to his citizens… But he doesn't want to take the human's soul… He is lost. He is alone. He is hopeless. And he just doesn't know what to do…

The end:

When it is time to face the king, Frisk and Rosie go on their own, ready for whatever the king decides is the right thing. When they arrive, they talk. The king offers them tea and brings them to the garden of roses, telling both about his late child. Frisk also tells him about their late friend, being empathetic with the king's pain. They explain that they were ready for it to be over, but it wasn't. They were here, and if their life could serve for something, they would like to be for something good like bringing hope for the people, and if that was the case, they would happily die… But at this point, Toriel; Papyrus; Mettaton; Undyne and Alphys arrive. They confront the king and the human, explaining how important they were for them, and how much Frisk helped them be true to themselves. Telling both how much more important the human's life is than what they give themselves credit for. The king was conflicted still, but at this point Sans arrives. He tells Asgore how the human managed to give hope for someone who didn't want it. And he asks his father to please, don't listen to the council. Spare the human's life. With that, Asgore decides it. Frisk life is too valuable to be lost by a foolish dream.

Everyone is happy, hugging the human and singing them praises. But at this point, the members of the council arrive, they tell the king they knew he would disappoint them. The guards move, circling the group. Asgore and Toriel attempt to call them off but they don't listen. They belong to the council for some time now. The whole group is captured and tossed into the dungeon, just until the council decides what to do with the human soul. But, Rosie the rose finally lets go of Frisk's arm, promising he would get help. He slips between the cracks of the stone walls, his soul full of the hope the others had for him. And when the council returns, ready to take Frisk's soul, the castle is invaded. Led by Rosie, all the other monsters the human helped came to everyone's rescue. They managed to overthrow the council, freeing the captured monsters and human. The king and queen made a formal speech, thanking Frisk for their kindness and for giving them all hope. Weeks after. Life still wasn't perfect, but it was a little better. Monster were happier and now with the queen back, life conditions were better. Alphys working on another way to break the barrier when she and Undyne find out they are carrying a souling. Of course, it felt obvious now. Monsters souls are made from hope, so when the parents had so little hope to give, they were unable to create a child… But having the answer for it didn't mean it would be able to be fixed out of nowhere, but it was a start. A start of something new. Something beautiful. Frisk knew it. And they would do their best to help everyone along the way, and everyone would be there to help them. They can't help but smile, maybe Chara would be proud of them… Either way, no matter how hard it would be, they had hope. Things will get better.

Comments and Funfacts:

I imagine Papyrus and Mettaton’s relationship on this reimagine to be queerplatonic! Papyrus being aroace

My main goal with Mettaton and Sans’s storyline is so that they would parallel each other, of how that kind of trauma could make the victim respond and the difference between healthy and unhealthy coping mechanisms (Having a support system vs abusing narcotic substances)

Where Frisk fell, there would be many tombs from other humans, and the only reason they survived was because Rosie healed them

Toriel and Asgore were never really in love, they had a lot of care for each other but not in a romantic sense, so when Toriel returns to be the queen they are also platonic

Alphys was Sans's dealer and they would get into an argument later in the story when she cuts him off

And I think that's it! This was a lot so thank you if you read this far! ^^ If you have any questions please feel free to ask them and I'll do my best to answer them!

#fanart #digital #digital art #art #undertale #sans #alternate universe #sansby #grillby (undertale)#sans au #sans x grillby #alphys #undyne #frisk au #underlust #alphyne #underlust reimagined #asgore dreemurr

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thattimdrakeguy · 3 days ago

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Zoanne Is The Most Underrated Tim Drake Side Character Ever

Most of Tim's side characters are either super simple, and likable, totally forgettable, or hit or miss, or just not built to last.

But with Zoanne, I've always really liked her. She was written to represent something in Tim's story, instead of being simple background dressing. She feels like someone that does her own thing when Tim's not around, instead of despawning like a video game NPC. And adds way more than simply mild amusement.

And her positioning within Tim's life is also great ground for character work. Something a great side character should be able to do.

Like in this instance giving Tim someone to ground himself, while his life is growing more abnormal thanks to being adopted by Bruce. Most writers would've elected to have Tim get a more weird life--

Remember that weird arc where Tim faked an Uncle to avoid being adopted despite seeming excited at the idea Bruce wanted him to be around like that--?

Was a bit hokey, though I know it has it's fans, but for me it felt a little out of character, a little too done purely for fun, and not a good accurate portrayal of the character. I like my stuff character driven and fun, not just--nonsense.

The writing feels natural and real. You get to see more of Tim's personality. He's smart, but he's not someone who thinks he's special. This is a trait that's even been identified in Tim by people in editorial in old 90s DC Comics when Tim was still being developed. So it's a very purposeful character choice.

He has his moments of showing off like anybody, especially a kid. However when not caught up in the moment, he's extremely humble. Though, socially stumbles at the same time. He's still a bit awkward around the edges. Social, but not entirely natural.

Remember also Tim wanted to go to a normal public school close to the beginning of his introduction as a character. If you read his origin and early issues in his newly formed time as a Batman character he was still in boarding school. Tim wanted to go to public school though. Tim is someone who loves to feel grounded despite his privlages.

And he's putting in the effort to maintain that despite his new semi-celebrity status as the newly adopted son of Bruce Wayne. It's his whole purpose of being here. Tim's a proactive character in his story, not reactive. He wanted to be tutored despite not needing it. Which helps him remain interesting, wondering what he'll be up to next.

And he lifts Zoanne's spirits up, because he's such a good hearted person. Like a natural extension of who he tries to be for Batman but applied to someone else in a less major way. Making it an interaction specifically something Tim Drake would do, instead of a measly generic interaction to build up a boring romance.

No, it's character work all the way through. Tim never stops being Tim, because the writer got lazy, like what happens under other writers. He's still showing who he is as a person the entire scene.

Heck, the first panels I showed where Tim has to come up with an excuse for smelling bad, is just fun work to be had with him being a kid crime-fighter. Small, but there, and very fun.

Zoanne's also very likable, so is her family. Feels like it could be your own family or the family of a friend. It deepens her own character as well.

How many Tim Drake side-characters have we actually got to see their family well-enough to know their own personalities? Ariana? There's not a lot. Which makes you want to see Zoanne again too. She's a side-character, yes, but she still feels like her own person. Which makes her more memorable and likable. That's a strong thing to get from a side-character, who are often bottom of the barrel in terms of characterization.

I've read the entire Robin series many times, and I couldn't tell you the name of all the side-characters, or describe their families to you.

I can with Zoanne, though.

She's someone who definitely should've came back by now. I think she's the greatest side-character Tim has ever had, and should be more beloved by the fandom.

If only she lasted longer and wasn't thrown away by one of the next writers--

#Tim Drake #Robin #DC Comics

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folklorebyswift · 23 hours ago

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behind the camera

fake dating & pr relationship with billie eilish

synopsis: Madison Cole is an aspiring actress with every advantage-wealth, connections, and a last name that opens doors in Hollywood. But privilege doesn't guarantee talent or fame, and Madison is eager to prove she's more than just a product of nepotism. When her powerful father orchestrates a PR relationship between her and global pop star Billie Eilish, Madison reluctantly agrees, knowing it could fast-track her rise.

What will spark when the cameras stop rolling?

———————————————————————————

Chapter 1 — she’s an actress

Madison's POV

I barely make it through the front door of my parent's house before kicking off my shoes.

One lands by the stairs, the other somewhere near the wall—I don't fucking care.

My jeans feel stiff, my hoodie still smells like him, and I've got that gross post-cry headache creeping in behind my eyes even though I haven't actually cried yet.

I wander through the massive house looking for my dad—the only person I want to talk to right now—but the silence tells me he's not home.

I was at Luke's house when I got the email.

We appreciate your time and energy. We've gone another direction.

That's all they said.

I hired a dialect coach. I forced my friends to read lines with me for weeks.

I put everything into this.

Not even a sentence. Not even a name. Just a vague, gutless "we've gone another direction" like I was some forgettable extra.

I sink down onto the bench in the hallway, tugging my hoodie sleeves over my hands like I'm fifteen again and trying to disappear.

God, I should've just told them who my dad was.

One word—one last name—and it would've been mine. I know it. They'd have lit up the second they realized I'm his daughter. Taken me more seriously. Maybe even bent over backwards to make it work.

But I didn't. Because I wanted to earn it.

And now I'm sitting in a house full of things I didn't earn, wishing like hell that just once, hard work would be enough.

My phone buzzes in my pocket.

It's Luke.

lucas!! <3

Did I do something wrong? Why'd you leave so suddenly?

Luke and I have known each other forever.

Our parents are best friends—the kind that do joint family dinners and plan summer vacations like it's still 2005. Every year, same beach house, same inside jokes, same easy rhythm.

Last summer, things shifted. We got a little drunk, crossed a line, and didn't bother stepping back.

We've been hooking up ever since.

It's not serious. Not romantic. Just comfortable. Familiar. Something to make the world feel a little less heavy, a little less lonely—at least for a few hours.

I send a quick reply, blaming it on my mom—some vague excuse about her needing me for something. It's easier than explaining that I'm this fucked up about losing a part in a movie to someone else.

I drag myself upstairs and collapse onto my bed, not even bothering to pull back the covers.

I open the email again.

I stare at it for a few more seconds, hoping maybe the words will rearrange themselves into something less soul-crushing.

They don't.

With a heavy sigh, I close out of it and open my group chat instead—

a straight a bi and a gay

mads

is anything going on tonight? i need a drink. maybe twelve.

brookey <3

bad day? bad dick? what's got you down?

kenz :)

grace said there's a party in the hills. rooftop. obnoxious and exclusive. could be fun. could be terrible. should we go find out?

mads

in. getting ready now, i'll pick you both up in an hour. kennedy, do you think grace would drive my car and us home? i'm planning on getting shitted.

brookey <3

shit ok i guess im in too?

kenz :)

she said that's fine. see you guys soon.

I lock my phone and get up to get ready.

The first outfit I pull out feels too try-hard. The second one makes me look like I'm trying not to try. Third time's the charm: black crop top, baggy low-rise jeans, and the leather jacket my dad says makes me look "intense"—which is exactly the point. I grab my keys, throw on my boots, and head out the door without bothering to tell anyone where I'm going. My mom's probably in her pilates cave and my dad's MIA, still. It's fine.

My G-Wagon growls to life as I pull out of the driveway, my phone buzzing with a text from Brooke.

Ten minutes later, I pull up in front of Kennedy's place.

Kennedy, Grace and Brooke are already waiting outside like they've been summoned for a Vogue cover shoot.

Brooke's in a tiny black dress that looks like it was painted on, Kennedy's wearing leather pants and a sheer top that makes her look like a walking threat. Grace is in a pale blue slip dress that hits just above the knee. Sweet. Innocent.

I lean over and push the passenger door open.

"Get in, fuckers" I call.

Brooke rolls her eyes and climbs in like she's taking a seat on her throne. "You're late."

"Shut up."

Kennedy slides into the backseat, Grace following behind her. "Well, good news; you look hot enough to ruin lives tonight."

"Ruining lives is literally all I have left," I mutter, pulling away from the curb.

The drive up into the Hills is quiet, the four of us staring out at the glittering city below like we're about to go to war.

We pull up to the house—modern, angular, obnoxiously lit, with a valet line of luxury cars outside like a rich-kid museum exhibit. There are already people spilling out onto the driveway, all perfectly curated and fake as hell. Just the way we like it.

I throw the G-Wagon into park and toss the keys to Grace. "Thanks for being DD tonight. I owe you one."

"Of course, I don't mind," she replies softly, polite as always.

We've all known her for a while, but it wasn't until she and Kennedy started dating that she really began to open up to us.

We make our way up to the house.

The music's too loud, the crowd too pretty, and I love every second of it.

We weave through the party like we've been here a million times—because we have. It's always the same: models, celebrities, DJs, fake friends, real egos.

I find the bar fast and slam my hands down on the counter.

"Three shots of Tito's please."

The first one burns. The second goes down easier. By the third, my chest starts to get warm and I can finally begin to forget the day.

Brooke's beside me, sipping something pink and dangerous, already talking to a guy she'll ghost by the morning.

I make my way back to the bar, "Tito's with a splash of cran please."

I down it in 10 seconds, needing the world to blur around me faster.

Bodies are hitting me.

The music is loud.

Kennedy and Grace are dancing behind me.

Suddenly the room feels too small.

I need fresh air.

I make my way outside and sit at one of the pool's lounge chairs.

A few people are laughing in the pool, I pretend they don't exist.

Suddenly, my chair sinks with weight sitting down next to me.

"Hey, you look like you could use some water," the beautiful voice says next to me offering me a cold bottle.

———————————————————————————

this book is a collab betweem me @/folklorebyswift and my bestie @/daddyb1ll1e on wattpad

new chapters are getting posted to wattpad before they get posted here! make sure to look it up there to read early :)

#billie eilish #billie eilish x reader #billie x reader #billie eilish x female reader #billie x fem reader #billie eilish x fem!reader #fan fiction #billie eilish fanfiction #billie x y/n #billie x you #hit me hard and soft #hmhas billie eilish #hmhas tour #folklorebyswift writes

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shra-vasti · 2 days ago

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OKAY! I've been reading this review since YESTERDAY and I've lost the count of times I've read it without squealing in happiness🙏 Rae, my baby♥️ I don't even know how to thank you properly, ITS NOT GOING TO BE ENOUGH I KNOW!!

About Sunghoon, I've said this countless of times and I'll say it again, thank you so much everyone for showering Sunghoon with so much love♥️♥️ he deserves every ounce of it I know😔 like where will we find a man as selfless, loyal and full of love like Sunghoon?? He has so much love in his heart, I hope he'll find someone who will create safe space for him to show it! I LOVED WRITING HIS CHARACTER THE MOST!

About Ava- I totally get your point of view, she did what she did because she never got the attention she wanted. Which doesn't excuse her actions and she's still dense enough to not realize what she did wrong but yeah I felt pity of her, not in a sympathetic way but more like, "how much depraved of love you need to be to act like that" but she was low-key narcissist, and ofcourse manipulative.

About their kiss, girl! I tried very hard for it to be messy and raw! It would be weird if suddenly they acted lovey dovey with each other just after Jay left her because she lied to him. Like imagine you share your vulnerable feelings with someone you believe is a good person just to know they knew the solution to your problem but they still decided to let you drown in your hurt instead of saving you. Jay was hurt but also so in love to not do anything!!!

Also, TMI but this is the first time I wrote smut so I was second guessing posting with it but then decided to post it anyway!

I wrote that poem (if you'll call it poem) back in 2021 and when I was writing this fic I suddenly remembered it and thought "oh this suits their dynamic well" so I did some edits in it and incorporated it in the fic.

Yes! Like it was mentioned in PART 1- the reader had issues with having healthy relationships, be it her toxic first boyfriend Joon who crossed her boundaries or Ava who befriended her just so she could shine more beside her. YN always knew she was treated bad, she just needed someone to be there for her which she ditched them and HYPHENIX provided her that safe environment. I really love her friendship with Sunghoon, Heeseung and especially Jake.

About Sunghoon and his pretty girl, both of them loved each other dearly, and while YN did love Sunghoon, her heart always belonged to Jay. Maybe if the letter thing never happened and Jay never knew about her feelings, she would've definitely chose Sunghoon. But unlike Sunghoon, Jay loved her even when he didn't know what she looked like, he was just manipulated into another relationship.

And to say you got out of your writer's block because of this? It's like the highest form of compliment I've received! I'm glad I could encourage someone to not stop writing🥺🥺 thank you @mrsjjongstby my love for this review. I'll forever cherish you and your words of affirmation whenever I feel like I'm lacking. I love you so much♥️ Thanks for taking your time to read this😭😭

Also go and check out my girl @mrsjjongstby work, she writers amazing stories too♥️♥️♥️ I'm in love with her writing!! The way she portrays the characters? The tension between them? The uniqueness of her concepts? Chef kiss😩😩😩

I DON'T LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND, PJS (PART 2)

• SYNOPSIS: A fleeting encounter with Park Jay at a high school party leaves a quiet imprint on your then broken heart. Years later, you find him again, now as an icy guitarist of the campus boy band, HYPHENIX. You never spoke again, but you remembered his eyes, his words, his presence and how he lingered at the back of your mind years after. You wanted to reach for him, but he was so far, popular, untouchable that you decided to pour your heart to him in secret, until the secret was revealed but someone else claimed it before you could.

Or in which you pour your heart into anonymous letters for the cold, distant guitarist, Jay, only to watch your best friend claim every word as her own.

• PAIRING: Park Jongseong (Jay) x afab!reader

• WORD COUNT: 20.9k

• CONTENT TAGS: Non idol au, university settings, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, strangers to lovers, slow burn, shy reader x popular Jay, down bad reader, betrayal, abandonment, miscommunications or lack of communications, profanities, name calling, stereotyping, best friend's boyfriend, reader is nosy and loves other people's business way too much (my twin fr), fear of rejection and unwanted attention, body image issues in the beginning, toxic relationships and friendships, low-key stalker reader, reader wears glasses, not proofread, lmk if I missed anything.

• WARNING TAGS: MDNI, smut, soft dom!Jay, sub!reader, choking, hair pulling, dry humping, oral (fem receiving), multiple orgasms, reader isn't a virgin but is inexperienced.

PART 1

• AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is the second part, I hope you'll like it. Your likes, comments and reblogs are always welcomed and appreciated. Thank you so much for showering my write ups with your love. Happy reading♡♡

Your heels clack sharply against the tiles, still you're moving, pushing away people from your way, almost knocking over drinks that were kept on the counter. By the time you're near the door, he's already walking down the stairs. You turn around briefly to look at Ava's room from where Jay walked out but you were disappointed to see her nowhere in sight. The thought made you angry, if she was going to take what should've been yours she should've at least done it properly. She should've taken care of his heart, she should've at least pretended to care, instead she didn't even make an effort to follow him out. You turned back around, feet barely stable as you ran down the stairs, "Jay, wait!"

His steps don't flatter, his shoulders hunched as he walked towards his car, you increased your pace, because you couldn't see him like this, couldn't watch him walk away from her, away from you, when he doesn't even know the whole truth behind everything that is happening in his life. His steps slow down as he reaches near his car and you extend your hand to grab his arm. "Jay-" your fingers clasp around his jacket, "wait please." And he stops, not because he wanted to but because the voice that rang in his ears is yours and not hers. His shoulders stiffened, then he spun, and suddenly, before you could even react, he crashed into your arms with a force which felt more emotional than physical. His arms circled around your waist tightly as a sob escaped his lips.

You sighed deeply, unable to form words as his body shook in your arms. You held him tightly, one hand cradling his head as he buried his head in your neck. You stayed still, trying to be his anchor when his world was falling apart right in your arms. You could feel his tears slide down your chest from your neck, you rubbed his back in order to console him. After a while his sobs subsided but his hold on you remained tight, not too much to hurt but enough to remind you of their presence on your body, firm enough to know you won't disappear. He pulled away from you, his movements abrupt as if someone had just poured a bucket of ice water on him in the middle of the winter. He took a few steps back, hands grasping the door of his car. He looked at you.

"What are you doing here?" His eyes glassy as he questioned you, his gaze fell behind your figure to see if there's anyone else. You took a few deep breaths to calm yourself, ears ringing and eyes sensitive, "are you okay?" You saw his bottom lip quiver at your words, his shoulders slumping as if everything around him was weighing him down. "You should be inside, enjoying your night-" "I should. But I couldn't stay when I saw you walk out." The grip he had on the car's door wavered and he let his hand fall. "Why?" He questioned, eyes hazy as steps drifting closer, his hand lifting up to your face, "you seemed to be enjoying yourself on the dance floor though..." he mumbled as he swiped his thumb against the corner of your mouth, hand trembling slightly, "what do you mean?" Your breath shuddered, one hand clasping around his jacket.

"Your lipstick smudged a little," his gaze locked into your lips, "there, all good." You exhaled the breath you were holding when he stepped back, his thumb stained with the lipstick he removed from the corner of your mouth. He turned towards the car and you grabbed his shoulder to hold him back, "Jay, it isn't what it looked like." He faced you, tongue poking inside of his cheek as he scoffed softly, "doesn't matter to me, it's your life anyway," he opened the door and you stepped forward, the hand grabbing his shoulder moving up to rest softly against his face, "don't shut off, you always do this when you're stressed," your thumb brushed against his cheek, wiping the tears that had fell, "and it hurts to watch you lock everything inside you like you're alone in this. Lean on me, talk to me, just don't shut yourself out."

He observed you for a while, unable to find any words that would contradict yours. His eyes fell upon the people coming out of Ava's house and he held your hand, tugging you towards the passenger's seat and quickly running back towards the driver's seat, "I don't want people to misunderstand us, let's talk somewhere else." You turned around in your seat to look at people leaving the party, "you're right..." he looked at you before watching the people through his rearview mirror, "yeah." He started driving, and you couldn't tell where exactly he was trying to take you. He pulled up in an empty parking lot, got out and opened your door for you. He locked the car door and made his way towards the curb and sat on it, hands in his head as he took deep breaths to calm himself.

You slowly made your way towards him, giving him time to calm himself, you sat down beside him, not too far, nor too close. You removed your heels, feet aching with all the running, you put them beside you, hands instinctively holding your ankle to massage it a bit as you waited for Jay to say something. "Are they hurting that bad?" Your eyes found his face but his hands were focused on your leg, you stopped your movements, folding your arms on your knees, "tell me what happened." His eyes finally met yours and he sighed, "we had a fight, and I walked out." You put your head on your knees as you nodded at his words, "I don't like big parties, I'm allergic to chocolate, she knew about this, I wrote those things in the letters I sent back to her and she's trying to make me the crazy one for not appreciating her efforts."

"Jay," you started even though you had no idea what to say. "I don't get it anymore," he sighed as he run his hand through his hair, "those letters mean the world to me, gave me the strength when I almost gave up, they talked about me, not the popular guitarist of HYPHENIX, those letters understood my silences and that's why I fell, that's why I thought I could have something real with Ava." You watch him unravel in front of you and you swallow back the burning feeling igniting in your stomach at his words, "maybe she never expected you to hold those letters so dearly, Jay." He looked at his eyes darkening as the possibility of your words being true settled inside him, "how could I not hold those letters close? They were the foundation of our relationship, the Ava who wrote those letters saw through me when everyone else just expected me to be perfect."

You smiled softly looking down at your hands at his words, "maybe you're trying to hold onto a version of her which only existed in those letters, sometimes people portray a version of themselves which they can't live up to, which leads to disappointment and heartbreak." He nodded at your words feeling confused yet understood, "maybe I am but is that my fault? For believing in it?" You shook your head at its words, laughing slightly, "It's not your fault for believing, its hers for not living up to it, sometimes it's easier to pretend especially if the words are wrapped in kind and comforting words inside an envelope."

"But her kind and comforting words were the exact reason why I fell for her, but now when I try to connect with her, she diverts the topic like it isn't a big deal. For her spotlight is everything, she always gushes about it, but when she wrote me those letters, she never once mentioned about my popularity, her letters rather focused on my musicality," you nodded your head as if you don't remember every single thing you wrote on those letters, like it doesn't hurt to watch him going through so much pain when all you wanted was for him to be happy, "maybe she doesn't know you the way you thought she would. Maybe she wasn't as serious about those letters as you were."

He turned his body towards you fully, eyes narrowing deep in thought, "no one can notice things that deep if they aren't serious about it," you play with the bracelet in your hand nervously, "how am I supposed to find a solution to this?" He sighed as he buried his head on his hands, you contemplated to reach out to him but you did it anyway, your hand slide up to run your finger through his hair, he didn't stop you, "don't force yourself to be somewhere you don't belong, if you feel she's not the person you fell in love with then it's better to break things up." He lifted his head enough to look at you, "It's not that easy," you let your hand fall on your lap, sighing deeply you muttered something which always lingered at the back of your mind, "Jay, don’t build your entire world around someone who can’t hold it for you."

Your eyes fell upon the stars that shone brightly above you, and his eyes were focused on you as those words left his mouth, "I think I might confront her about this whole situation, I really don't like how things are going in between us, we always fight and pretend in front of others that everything is fine. I don't like it." Your mind drifted far off as you watched the night sky, feeling exhausted at the events that unfolded today. You thought Ava would take notice of basic things and at least pretend to care for Jay, but it was clear that all she wanted was popularity rather than a companion. You blame yourself for supporting her reckless choices cause now you're doubting every single thing you did that led you to this moment.

Your lips twitched in discomfort, you knew watching Ava in Jay's arms would be hard but watching him break down in front of you because of her was harder. You wanted to tell him he deserved the kind of love he hoped he'd get from Ava, that it's not wrong to fall for someone and be disappointed when their actions wouldn't match their words. But how would they match when both of you were two different people? You cursed internally, taking a deep breath, if only she never lied, if only you never supported her. God you hated her so much for complicating things. "Jay," his name left your mouth like a confession, he hummed, eyes still trained on your face, "I don't like your girlfriend."

Sunghoon checked the time on his phone, squinting slightly as the sun was up, he knocked on the door, stepped a few steps back and waited, "oh! You're here!" He heard the person at the door say, leaning his weight on one of his legs, eyes glued to his phone as he scrolled to instagram. He barely hummed in response, finally looking up, "Where are the gifts?" Ava's smile dropped at his dull tone, "well good morning to you too," she said, rolling her eyes and stepping aside to make way for him. Sunghoon wordlessly put his phone inside his jeans pocket, entering the same house he was in yesterday night, he looked at the surroundings. The house was yet to be cleaned fully, "I'll call some cleaners to help you with the cleaning-" his words were cut off when Ava grabbed his arms, "no, I've got this, though thank you for offering your help, you're such a gentleman Hoon."

Sunghoon gulped, removing her hands from his arm, "it's Sunghoon for you." Ava frowned at his words, pout forming on her face as she glared at him, "but you let her call you Hoon though." He sighed, looking anywhere but her face, "she is allowed to call me that. I allowed her to call me that. I don't recall asking you to call me Hoon." She stepped forward, closing the distance between them, and Sunghoon stepped back, "you should be close to me not her, I'm your best friend's girlfriend!" He exhaled deeply, already regretting coming to her house, "exactly, my best friend's girlfriend, and your association with Jay doesn't define if you'll get close to me or not, it's actually based on how you are as a person."

Ava scoffed, flicking her hair back as if she couldn't grasp the concept, "she's not even that fun, doesn't do parties, isn't popular, has nothing special about her, she's not interesting....I don't know why you pay so much attention to her!" Sunghoon looked at her, boredom laced on his face but his eyes showed the quiet furry he felt within, "well at least she doesn't back-bitch about her best friend! Maybe we like her better because she's a better person than you'll ever be Avalyn." She flinched at his harsh tone, footsteps retreating, "Sunghoon....don't get close to her please." He scoffed at her, eyes trained on the main door then towards the huge cardboard box placed in the corner labelled 'Jay's gift', "you greedy woman, you're dating my best friend yet you're trying to continue to hit on me?"

He took a few steps towards her, and she backed off, suddenly trembling under his intense gaze, "isn't he enough for you? I thought you stopped being a fucking whore and finally came to your senses, guess I was wrong, huh?" She fell down on the chair behind her, eyes shut closed as Sunghoon's words rang in her ears, "you kept on harassing me to sleep with you, even after I clearly declined, then suddenly my best friend introduced you as his girlfriend to me, you think I'm stupid?" Her lips trembled as she looked up at him, eyes glossy but he continued, "and I know your games Ava, you think I believed you when you said you wrote those letters for Jay? I don't think your pea-sized brain could even comprehend a single sentence written on it. I'm entertaining you just because I care too much about Jay and his feelings to hurt him bluntly by the truth."

"Sunghoon, please don't tell him, I beg you. I really love Jay, I'll take care of him well..." His hand slammed against the wall near him, "you're dating him for quite some time and yet you don't know what things he likes and dislikes and you're telling me you'll take care of him?" Tears fell from her eyes, hands shaking at the possibility of her truth being exposed, "Sunghoon, I'll be a good girlfriend, I'll keep him happy, please I beg you." He just looked at her, walking towards the gift box and picking it up in his arms, "you still try to hit on me subtly and say you'll be a good girlfriend? You think I don't notice your advances? Don't notice how whenever me and your best friend are close you take her away from me? You can't even be a good friend Ava, how will you ever be a good girlfriend? You're just a selfish bitch who only thinks about herself."

Sunghoon turned around towards the door, taking a few long strides to reach his car, he put the gift box in the backseat and shut the door of his car. He opened the door of the driver's seat when Ava grabbed his hand, and turned to face her, "I can ruin your friendship if I want, you know?" She spoke through gritted teeth, hands now clenched in fist by her side, "you think Jay would be by your side if I tell him you tried to take advantage of me?"

Sunghoon blinked at her once, twice, then laughed loud and full, straight from his chest as he threw his head back. He grabbed the hood of his car to keep his balance. He wiped the tears that escaped his eyes as he calmed himself, "I wanted to say something hurtful but your words just made me realize how pitiful you are," Ava frowned at his words, "maybe if you weren’t so selfish and actually knew how to keep real friends, you wouldn't be so quick to throw out threats like this. But go ahead and see if he believes that over someone who has known him better than you ever will." He turned around, sliding into his driver's seat and driving off without giving her a single chance to speak.

Sunghoon parked his car in Jay's parking place, taking notice of Jay's car being parked in its usual spot. He picked up the gift box and made his way towards the main door. He kicked his door, flinching slightly as the door was unlocked so it slammed against the wall. The sound woke Jay up from where he was curled up on his couch in the living room, "what the fuck is up with you?" Jay mumbled although he wanted to lecture his friend about guest etiquette. "Ah close the door for me yeah? As you can see my lord, my hands are full." Sunghoon took off his shoes and invited himself into his best friend's house, keeping his gift box on the coffee table and jumping to sit on the couch.

"Since you weren't replying to your girl, she asked me to pick up your gifts from her house," Sunghoon grumbled reminiscing about the texts after texts he got from Ava which forced him to go and get Jay's gift. Jay just shrugged, still half asleep, rubbing his eyes as he approached Sunghoon, "did you atleast eat something?" Jay nodded at his friend's words, "yeah, I woke up, got fresh, made breakfast and ate it, washed the dishes, then slept again." Jay slumped beside Sunghoon, yawning. "Wow, I expected more sulking and less functioning adult energy from you."

Jay rolled his eyes, sitting up straight to open the box, "why did she call you? Could've waited for me to reply to her back..." Sunghoon looked at Jay, his mind drifting back to Ava's house, "she said her parent's will be home tonight, she needed to get rid of everything before they arrive," Jay nodded, remembering Ava telling him about her parents being very strict about everything. He remembered her telling him that you are her only friend whom her parents trust. "I'll get going, I am having some issues with my keyboard, I'll have it checked." Jay bid him goodbye and made his way back inside the house to open up the gift box.

He took off the gifts inside the box one by one, placing them neatly on the ground or on the coffee table as he emptied the box and folded it to throw it in the trash bin at the back of his house. He folded the cardboard box and made his way towards his backyard, he placed the box near the trash bin and started making his way back towards the house. His footsteps halted when he saw an envelope fallen near the backdoor of his house. He crouched down to pick it up, turning it around to inspect it carefully, 'Dear, Jay.' it read.

His eyebrow furrowed while looking at the envelope, a sense of familiarity growing within his heart as he read the label of the envelope. The handwriting, a huge smile etched upon his face at the familiar scribble of words, though in the letters he received the writer used to call his name a bit differently, he found himself feeling relieved. He made his way inside his room, rummaging through his closet to take out the box where he kept all the letters together. He took out one random letter to compare the handwriting, praying continuously for it to be the same. It had been a while since he saw the handwriting and he laughed at himself for being so excited over a trivial thing.

He grabbed his phone, when he found the handwriting matched, grinning happily even before opening the envelope to see what's inside. After a few rings Ava picked up the phone, her voice shaky as he finally called her back after being ignored for a whole night, "Jay, I'm sorry for yesterday baby, please don't be mad at me, I love you so much." He smiled at her, eyes focused upon the envelope on his hand, "It's okay Ava, I love you too, I just got your gift, thank you so much, baby. You made me so happy you have no idea." She laughed at his excited tone, breathing in relief that Sunghoon didn't share anything with him about what happened at her house, "you loved your gift?" She asked, her voice relaxed now, "yes I did."

"Thank god, Jay. I was stressed if you'd love it or not, I mean it took me days to find that limited edition watch, I'm so glad you loved it. Don't forget to wear it when you come to meet me, okay?" Jay's smile flattered as he focused on Ava's words then back at the envelope in his hand, a watch? His brows twitching in confusion, "did you attach anything else with your gift Ava?" He questioned, inspecting the envelope as if it would answer his questions, "umm just a bow." Jay hummed, his heartbeat frantic, "okay baby, I'll meet you soon." "See you." He hung up the phone, scoffing at himself as he laid back on his bed, the letters and envelope still spread near his legs. He picked up the envelope, sighing as he looked at it.

He dialed Ava's number again, mind swirling with thoughts waiting for her to pick up, "Jay? Did you forget something?" He sighed, putting the phone on speaker and keeping the letters back inside the box, "umm," he wondered, an idea popping in his head, "be ready in 2 hours, wanna spoil you a bit for giving me my birthday gift..." he could hear the excited squeal left leaving from her mouth, "why? You didn't have to, what do you want me to wear?" He chuckled, "wear anything, you look pretty anyway." He hung up the phone before she could speak further.

Jay was getting ready to pick Ava when his phone rang, the called ID showing 'Dikeu' in bold, he chuckled looking at the contact name for Jake, realizing Sunghoon must've changed it when he wasn't looking at his phone, "I'm free, wanna hangout?" Jay's eyebrows furrowed as he concentrated on the soft background music playing, "since when did your music taste change?" He could hear Jake chuckle as he turned the music off, "nah, the song is good, but I wasn't the one playing that..." Jay's heartbeat quickened, "who were you with?" Jake blinked once before your name left his lips.

"Oh what was she doing with you?" Jake pouted on the other end of the phone as if Jay could see him, "you aren't even interested in me anymore?" Jay groaned and a chuckle left Jake's mouth, "I dropped her home, our classes ended at the same time. Are you gonna tell me if you're free to hangout or not?" Jay rubbed his temple but replied nonetheless, "I've a date with Ava, I can't hangout today," Jake hummed, thinking on who to irritate next now that Jay was busy, "okay, I'll irritate someone else then!"

Jay leaned on his car as he waited for Ava to come out of her house, "Jay!" He lifted his head, eyes taking in her short satin dress that fit her body perfectly, she smiled at him, one hand stretched out for him to take, he held her hand, pulling her closer to give a quick kiss on her cheek, he guided her towards the passenger's seat and made himself comfortable on the driver's seat. The engine hummed beneath them as Jay scrolled through his playlist. When he found the song, he pressed play and Lee Hi’s Breathe poured softly into the car’s hush. He gave a quick glance towards Ava who didn't even utter a single word about his choice of the song.

"You wanna change the music or is this song fine?" She nodded at him, before he watched her lean towards the screen to play another, more upbeat song, "We are going on a date, I don't think dull songs like that match the vibe." Jay's eyebrows twitched but he didn't press further, just hummed in response and started driving off. After a while, "Jay," Ava called softly as she looked at him, he signaled her to continue, his eyes trained on the road, "I shouldn't have argued with you yesterday, I'm sorry, it was your birthday I should've been more patient," Jay smiled at her, one hand clutching the wheel while other was placed on his own lap.

Ava looked at his expressions before continuing, "It's just that I was so angry, I had to do everything alone since your friends decided to exclude me, even my own best friend didn't tell me about the surprise party. I felt so betrayed, I tried my best but it all crumpled down when I accidentally ordered the wrong cake, I mean, people can make mistakes right? But still, I'm sorry for making you feel like you don't matter to me..." she trailed off realizing Jay had barely acknowledged the words that slipped her lips, "didn't you say that it was the bakery who made the mistake?" Her breath hitched as she clasped both her hands together on her lap, "Isn't that the same thing?" Jay didn't question her further.

He stopped his car near a high end restaurant, handing over his car keys to the valet, he slid his hand on Ava's waist to pull her close. The restaurant was beautiful, with high ceilings and open plan structure so one could enjoy the view of nature around it. Ava gasped, thrilled to be at such a place, she turned around, giving Jay a little kiss before she dragged him towards a spot she wanted to sit. He pulled a chair for her, then made himself comfortable. The waiter handed both of them the menu card and left, but as soon as Ava was about to discuss what she wanted to eat, he stopped her, his smile sickeningly sweet as he looked at her.

"I'll order for you," he said, leaning a bit towards the table, "I remember you writing about your favorite dishes in the letters, I want to be a good boyfriend and prove you that I remember all those things you wrote," Jay held her hand, softly rubbing circles at the back of her hand. She laughed awkwardly, nodding her head with way too much enthusiasm, he looked at her for a second too long, before dropping his gaze back on the menu, "since it's still day time, let's order tea first," He signaled the waiter to take the order, "two chamomile-lavender tea please," the waiter nodded asking if they needed anything else and Jay informed him he'll update further.

"Chamomile-......lavender tea?" Jay grinned at Ava's expressions, "yeah? I never tried drinking that combination but now that you're with me I thought why not? If in case I don't find it pleasing I can just pass it to you since you're so crazy about it." Ava's lips twitched but she managed to mask it behind a polite smile, swallowing a lump from her throat, "I hope you'll like," she trailed off, looking at the view, "I feel so refreshed after drinking it." Jay hummed clearly amused by her ability to still try her best at blending in, "refreshing? Didn't you say the bitterness of this combo helps you stay awake when coffee doesn't do it for you?" She pulled her hand out of his grip and clenched her hands tightly on her lap, "yeah that too."

"Here's your tea," the waiter placed the drinks on the table and Jay looked at Ava expectantly, she smiled at his direction, placing a trembling hand on the cup and take a sip, "I thought you'd be more enthusiastic about drinking it," Ava grimaced at the taste, but masked it with a semi-awkward smile which didn't even reach its full potential, "I am, just feeling tired from yesterday's party." He nodded solemnly at her words and urged her to continue drinking, smiling as he took a sip of the tea himself, "Ah it's too bitter for me," he pushed the tea towards Ava, "please finish this for me too baby." He could see color drain from her face but still acted oblivious, humming a song or complimenting the restaurant's architecture.

Ava finished both the tea, he grinned at her, kissing her hand and complimenting her, "I need to go to the bathroom, one second." He watched as Ava rushed off to the bathroom, leaning back on the chair and sighing. Ava came back, a bit breathless, Jay ordered the food and she sighed in relief that he ordered something she could eat without feeling like throwing up. "You okay baby? You don't look good," Ava sat on her chair, dabbing the sweat off her forehead with tissues, "Yeah, I don't know, I'm feeling suffocated suddenly," Jay watched her, nodding his head, "okay, let's get out of here then." He paid the bill and made their way towards the next destination he had in his mind.

"Baby what's this?" Ava wondered when he stopped the car in an unknown lane, getting out of the car and helping her with it. "You don't recognize? Didn't you say you loved this place?" Ava's heartbeat quickened, eyes wondering on numbers of small shops and stores lining up one after the other. Her eyes took in the surroundings, "haha, yeah. I remember this, it's just that I'm feeling so tired that my brain isn't working." Jay hummed, holding her hand and pulling her inside a bookstore hidden in between two large clothing shops. "It's okay, you said the smell of books calms you down, that's the reason I brought you here." She nodded wordlessly at his words, rubbing her nose slightly at the lavender candle lit at the entrance of the bookstore.

Ava panicked, realizing that Jay planned this whole date based on the letters written by his secret admirer. She could still feel her throat itching even after forcing herself to throw up the tea in the bathroom and if this thing continued she wasn't sure if she would be able to cover up. Jay made his way towards her, hand holding a couple of books which Ava didn't recognize and another holding a lavender scented candle. "Ava? You good baby?" Her nose itched, turning a bit red as she looked at Jay, clearly anxious, "Jay, it's getting late, shall we go back? I'm not feeling good at all, baby." He sighed, placing the candle back on the shelves and paying for the books before agreeing with Ava. She sighed in relief as they made their way back towards the car.

"Baby?" Ava hummed as she looked at the passing cars, "wanna hangout at my place before I drop you off at yours? We don't have to do anything, just cuddle, maybe drink some alcohol if you're up to it? Hm?" He glanced at her, before concentrating back on the road, "okay, sounds good to me." Jay smiled, extending his hand to give her hand a gentle squeeze. When they reached his house, he helped her remove her heels, taking her hand and guiding her towards his bedroom. Ava laughed, nudging Jay a little bit, "Wait here, I'll bring the drink." Ava sat on the bed, looking at his room, "open the sliding door, we'll drink outside, you'd love it."

Ava nodded, opening the door and helping Jay with the drinks. They were in the middle of drinking when the weather became gloomy, dark clouds spreading all throughout the sky, few drops of rain fell upon their clothes and Jay urged Ava to get inside. He bought the drinks and glasses inside, neatly putting the glasses on the sink. Till the time he returned from the kitchen, heavy downpour had blurred the word around them, and in the distance, thunder rolled low and slow. Ava flinched slightly, her hands clutching the comforter, "you okay baby?" She looked up, smiling slightly and he made his way towards her, eyes trained on the rain.

"Yes, just startled." Jay squinted his eyes at her, tilting his head, "thought you said you loved storms, why are you startled?" Ava shrugged, flinching again when lightning struck again, "why would I say that, I hate storms!" He crouched in front of her, his gaze hardening, "isn't that crazy? You said you loved the storms as it made you feel like you aren't the only one who is unraveling. I remember it clearly, you wrote about it, how they make you feel at peace." Ava froze, her eyes widening and body trembling under his fierce gaze, "I was just in a different headspace at that time."

"You always say that Ava, I was in a different headspace, I was feeling poetic, I didn't think you'd think so deeply of it, my opinion changed. It never ends!" Ava stood up, walking towards the bedroom door to create some distance in between them, "I was just trying my best to impress you because I love you, Jay. You're comparing me to a version of myself I curated just for you." Jay followed her, breath ragging, "are you sure that's the truth?" Ava paused, hesitating to say another word, "what do you mean?" she mumbled, leaning against the door.

"I just think, Avalyn," He taunted, voice low and dangerously calm, "I think you saw someone laying their heart bare, you saw how everyone noticed, you saw something genuine, which you could never be, and instead of respecting it like everyone else, you dressed yourself in someone else's devotion and had the audacity to call it yours!" He took a step closer, eyes burning through her, he slammed one hand on the door beside her head, "you saw someone bleed their love on the paper and got greedy. You never wanted love, just attention, and you didn’t care whose heart you had to break just to get what you wanted."

Ava looked at him, tears welling up in her eyes, she pushed Jay away, scoffing in disbelief, "you really think I would do something like that? After everything I've done for you? God! I knew this would happen, you just want a reason to get rid of me now that you're bored." Jay's jaw clenched at her words, "I'm sorry I didn't live up to your fantasy Jay, sorry that I couldn't talk in ink and metaphors for you." Jay pushed her against the door, eyes narrowing at her words, "it isn't about ink and metaphors, it's about the meaning behind them, you claimed those thoughts were yours, you silenced someone Avalyn, you banned someone from loving me the only way they knew how." Ava's jaw clenched but she kept quiet, unable to say anything in her defense with the way Jay was looking at her.

"Here's what you're going to do now Avalyn," he started, stepping back and glaring at her, his tone calm and calculated, "in few weeks it's your birthday, you're going to tell everyone there that you lied about those letters, and I'll tell them I don't hold any grudge against you so that we can both part ways without creating anymore mess." Ava's eyes widened at his words, all the things she did to gain the popularity wilting away in front of her eyes, "please Jay? Can't you give me a chance? We were doing fine, we can continue to do that. If the person who sent those letters to you loved you enough she would have exposed me long ago, but she didn't right? Please Jay, I beg you." Jay rubbed his temple, groaning as he threw his head back in frustration, "no, just do as I say, in a few weeks, at your birthday party, tell everyone the truth, and we're done for!"

You heave a sigh as you stand, leaning on one of the pillars of your university campus, looking at the downpour. It had been raining since yesterday night and hasn't stopped since then. Most of the students had either left the campus or found home in some corner or the university where they could wait till the downpour was light enough to travel through. You heard someone call your name, you turned slightly, smiling when you found Heeseung wave at you. "Done with your class?" You questioned, your eyes falling on your mobile screen to see if Ava responded to your texts or calls. "Yes, I wanted to go home but the rain is so heavy, you can't even see what's in front of you." You offered him a quick nod, eyes trained on the rainfall, but your mind drifted towards something else. Ava didn't attend any classes today, which was completely normal but what irked you most was her skipping the cheer practice. Her friends had stopped you to ask about her whereabouts and the only thing you could do was shrug in response.

"Yah, both of you," you jumped a little at the sudden voice, Heeseung chuckled before turning around to face his friend, Jake, "are you just going to stand there and watch the rain? Might as well come inside the music room and chill." You and Heeseung made your way inside the music room, you walked towards the window, dragging a chair with you, and sat on it, sighing. "I don't think the rain is going to stop anytime soon...." Sunghoon's voice trailed off as he spotted your figure sitting near the window as he walked inside the music room while talking to Jay. "Looks like someone loves rain way too much," Sunghoon smirked as he dragged a desk near your chair and sat on it, startling you in the process.

Jay quietly made his way towards the couch, slumping against it as he watched you interact with Sunghoon, a weird knot forming in his chest as he remembered you and Sunghoon sharing a kiss right in the middle of his birthday party. He kept wondering why he would feel so jealous in the first place, it wasn't like any of you were betraying him but he couldn't help but feel weirdly hurt whenever he saw both of you together. He was sure that if he kept on glaring at both of you with the same intensity then he'd actually be able to punch a hole in Sunghoon's face.

"Jay, did you bring your car?" Heeseung's voice brought him back to reality, his eyes looked around the room to see everyone already looking at him, he blinked a few times before nodding his head yes. Heeseung eyed him skeptically before nodding his head at his words, "so, Sunghoon, Jake and I slept over my house yesterday so we just took my car to come here," Jay nodded, hands playing with the ripped part of his jeans, "yeah so I need to take these two back to my house to retrieve their cars which is in complete opposite direction to where she lives," he pointed his index finger at you and you glared at him, "so will you drop her off?" Jay's eyes met yours, you smiled a little and he nodded, "ofcourse, I would. It shouldn't be a question."

And now you were sitting inside Jay's car as he pulled out of the university's campus. You leaned your head against the window, trying your best to not steal glances at Jay. You noticed he looked tired than usual, like he didn't get any sleep last night and with the way Ava had completely shut you out today, something must've happened between them again. You remember Jake texting you yesterday to ask if you were free to hangout, you had planned on deep cleaning your apartment that day so you declined and he told you Jay was busy taking Ava on date, you figured they mended the things between them but guess you were perhaps wrong.

You were busy with your thoughts when Jay's phone rang, he pulled his car aside and stopped, picking up the phone. You looked at him briefly as he was busy talking with someone on the phone. After sometime he hung up, giving you a side smile, "give me a few minutes, I just need to send this location to my cousin." You nodded, taking out your own phone to scroll through instagram when a loud thunder roared through the sky, your eyes widened at the sound, "damn, that was loud," you couldn't help but say as you leaned towards the windshield to look at the sky. Jay looked at you, surprised as you finally spoke something. "Scared of storms?" He questioned, giving you a quick glance before resuming his task, "no, I'm not. Just amazed by the intensity."

He locked his phone screen, throwing it somewhere in the compartment, the sound of thunder immediately sent his brain in a flashback mode, his mind drifting to the events that unfolded the previous night. He then turned his eyes on your figure which was still leaning towards the windshield, hands placed on the glass to wipe the condensation and see the view clearly. "You seem quite fascinated by the view," he couldn't help but chuckle at your wonder-like expressions, "oh I love storms, it brings me peace! I could sit and observe it all day!" Jay's smile flattered at your words, chest tightening at the familiarity of the words. He quickly swallowed the tension building in his throat and started driving towards your apartment.

You reached your apartment building, the thunder still loud above you, even the trees hazardly swayed left and right, and you could barely manage to stand still without struggling a bit against the wind. You knocked on the window of Jay's car and waited for him to roll it down. "I think it will be better if you wait for the weather to calm down a bit," you suggested. He shook his head, turning around his seat to look at the scenario out of the parking space of your building, "I think I can manage-" His words got cut off when a large tree branch flew past both of your line of vision, ripped from the tree like it was nothing, "yeah I think I can wait for a little bit." You smiled at him, stepping back and moving towards the elevator to press your floor button. Jay joined you inside the elevator and you sighed waiting for it to reach your floor.

"Would you like something to drink? Tea? Hot Coffee?" Jay paused to think, fingers tapping against his chin in deep thought as he sat on your couch, "what type of tea do you have?" You smiled bashfully, leaning against your kitchen door, "Mr. Park, what type would you like to drink? Your wish would be my command." He laughed at your words, "do you have chamomile tea?" You nodded your head in enthusiasm which Jay couldn't help but reciprocate, "I have all the types of tea, I sort of have a weird fixation on it." He smirked, getting up from the couch and following you inside the kitchen. He leaned against the kitchen counter, humming softly as he watched you gather the ingredients to make the tea. "Wow, you indeed have a crazy collection of tea."

You grinned back at him, opening the cabinet wider for him to get a better look, he stepped closer, hands raking his fingers through the jars. "Damn, you could open a tea stall," you solemnly nodded as if actually considering his suggestion. "What tea is your favorite? Taking a look at the jars I would say..." he trailed off, looking through the jars, "black, chamomile and lavender tea are your top picks." You gave him a thumbs up, taking the chamomile tea's jar off the cabinet and shutting it close. He made himself comfortable on the chair against the kitchen counter as he watched you make the tea, comfortable silence settled between them, the only sound being gentle clatter of cups, and soft bubbling of the water.

You poured the tea into two cups and slide one in front of him as you sat beside him, he smelled the tea, "oh it smells calming..." you grinned, taking a whiff of the tea yourself, "the weather is so beautiful, and the chamomile tea just made it more perfect, but do you want honey added into yours? I like to drink it bitter, I have to submit an essay tomorrow so I need to stay awake..." you mindlessly trailed off searching the cabinets for the bottle of honey, not realizing the weight of your words, mind temporarily forgetting about you mentioning about it in one of the letters. Jay felt a sense of deja vu take over inside him yet again but before he could say a single word to you the doorbell rang.

You put the bottle of honey in front of him, wondering who would visit you at this time. You made your way towards the living room and looked at the window at the end of the hallway, the weather had calmed down significantly. You opened the door, swinging it open to see Ava standing in front of you, she huffed a breath, "I've been ringing your doorbell since forever," she rolled her eyes, stepping forward and pushing your figure aside slightly since you didn't move an inch. "I've been trying to reach you since last night and you ignored me, and now you randomly showed up at my apartment without replying or calling me back?" You complained as you followed her figure back into your living room.

"Do I need to always inform you about my whereabouts or something?" She hissed, sitting on your couch rather harshly, "my mood is so off, my life is about to turn upside down and you only care about me ghosting you?" You crossed your arms over your chest, leaning your weight on one of your legs, "well yes since I texted and called you to ask about those exact things Ava!" You saw Jay slowly making his way towards the living room from your peripheral vision, he stood just near the kitchen door, Ava's back against his. "You should have tried harder to reach me, you could've skipped classes and visited me home, I even missed my cheer practice for God's sake!" You nervously glanced at Jay before speaking, "you know I had an important exam today, I told you about it ages ago, and it was raining so heavily how do you expect me to visit you?"

"I don't care, you should be beside me when I shut you out, shouldn't you as my best friend seek me when I pull away from everyone?" She complained, hands pulling at her head. "Well she tried reaching out to you through texts and calls, what more do you want her to do when there's a storm going on and she doesn't have any vehicle?" Ava sat up straight, eyes going wide as Jay stood beside you, "Jay? What are you doing here?" Her gaze travelled in between you and him, wondering how he had time to be at your apartment when he didn't reply to even a single text from her. "That shouldn't be your main focus, is this how you always talk with her?" You grabbed his arm when he stepped closer to her, his jaw clenched, Ava's gaze landed on your hand on Jay's arm, you released your hold when he stopped his steps.

"Answer me!" You flinched at the tone of his voice, Ava swallowed, clenching her fist tightly, "no, I'm not thinking straight and wanted to seek solace in my best friend especially after what happened last night!" Jay scoffed, pinching his nose in annoyance, "this isn't how you seek solace in someone..." Ava slammed her head against the back of the couch, clearly not prepared for Jay's interrogation, "I'm sorry, what are you doing here anyway?" Jay shrugged, turning towards you, "I think I should get going, the weather is calm enough for me to drive back, thanks for the tea." You nodded at him, bidding him goodbye and closing the door behind him, confusion etched upon your face.

"How come my boyfriend was in your apartment?" You turned around to look at Ava who was already on her feet, making her way towards the kitchen. You followed her to find her standing near the kitchen counter, taking a sip of tea from your cup. She instantly spit it out in the sink, throwing the rest of the tea along with it. "I didn't even take a single sip!" You groaned as you approached her, "since when do you drink this shit?" You squint your eyes at her words, her face contouring into that of a grimace, "what do you mean since when? You should know I prefer drinking tea to calm myself." Ava stopped midway, your words dawning heavy on her shoulder as she remembered what Jay said about drinking chamomile-lavender tea. She shook her head, making her way back into your living room.

"What happened to you anyway? Are you guys fighting or something? He didn't even say goodbye to you," you sat beside her, keeping your head on the back of the couch. "He found out I didn't write those letters..." she trailed off, her fingernails digging at her skin, "what?" You straightened up, eyes going wide at the realization, "how?" She scoffed, slumping against the armrest, "I didn't even get to bask in my popularity that much, how am I supposed to explain this to my other friends and cheer team?" You rubbed your temple, feeling anxious, "is that what you're worried about?" Ava rolled her eyes, "he wants me to confess about lying in my birthday party."

"What?" Ava sat up, looking straight into your eyes, no guilt about what she did, "he said something about confessing that I lied and then he wouldn't make a big deal out of this and then we can part ways," you looked at her for a moment, taking in all the things she dumped into you in a span of 5 minutes, "I warned you about this, but you didn't listen, just apologize to him, tell him you want to silently part ways, maybe if you look sorry enough he'll forgive you." She threw her hand in the air, "no he won't make this any easier, he was quite angry." You sighed, "well of course he is, you literally lied your way into the relationship, he must be feeling so betrayed and hurt, I told you not to do that, why do you have to be so selfish Ava?"

"Oh you two seem to be so deeply connected with each other to always defend each other's feelings in front of me, who's best friend are you? Try to think of something!" You shook your head at her, completely declining to be the one to help her after what she did, "you are going to do what he said, that's the only way you can get him to forgive you." She groaned, slamming her head against the armrest in frustration, "you aren't helping me with this," she got up, gathering all of her belongings and slamming the door shut behind her when she left. You thought about reaching out to Jay, your fingers hovering just long enough to feel the weight of the choice. But doubt slipped in quietly. What if he thought less of you too? What if saying it out loud only pushed him further away? You didn’t have the answers and maybe, deep down, you weren’t sure you were ready to hear them from him.

You were sitting on the bleachers, the court empty aside from a few students lounging around the area, "why do I always find you as if you're in mid-philosophical mental breakdown?" You tilt your head upward, removing the headphones from your ears, "I don't know Heeseung, you tell me." You saw him playfully roll his eyes as he sat down next to you. Jay, Jake and Sunghoon join right after with Jay sitting on your other side, Jake and Sunghoon sitting in front of you. "Why are you guys here anyway? Don't you guys have practice or something?" Jake gasped, an offended expression forming on his face, "why do you hate us so much? Are we not cool enough to hang out with you?"

"Stop with that 'too cool for you to hangout with' joke, you're stretching it so far up it's gonna explode," Sunghoon laughed at your expressions, "I did not think of you as a violent type pretty." You opened your mouth to retaliate but nothing came out, you just looked at him, trying to ease the rapid beating of your heart after hearing him call you pretty. After the kiss, Sunghoon didn't pressure you to explain anything to him, didn’t even ignore you but he stopped calling you pretty, your own name sounding so foreign when it left his mouth, you thought with time you'd get used to it but there he was, once again with that silly smirk of his, calling you pretty.

"Oh how blessed do we have to be to find HYPHENIX sitting here!" All of your head turned towards the voice, the captain of the cheer team, Gyuri smiled, behind her stood Ava along with a few other members of the cheer squad. "We were just leaving," Jake announced, already standing up, "why would you do that? Ava, does your boyfriend's friend hate us?" She pouted, eyes trained on Jake who just rolled his eyes in annoyance, a complete 180° from how he teased you a few minutes ago. You wondered if both of them had any history, Sunghoon didn't even glance at them after initially looking to see who called their name, Heeseung pretended to be busy on his phone. "It's not like that Gyuri," Ava mumbled looking down.

Gyuri scoffed, crossing her arms across her chest, "It's Ava's birthday next week, I'm pretty sure I'll meet all of you there, right? It's going to be so much fun, everyone's going to be there." Jay nodded, not really looking towards Ava or even trying to have any sort of interaction with her, Gyuri noticed, she turned her head towards Ava, "did you two fight or something, you guys were fine just a few weeks ago!" Ava smiled awkwardly, making her way towards Jay, sitting beside him and leaning against his arm, "it's lovers quarrel, nothing we can't work upon." Gyuri looked at her skeptically before shrugging off and turning around and leaving.

Other three boys exchanged a look, clearly sensing the tension between Jay and Ava, they looked at you and you just smiled, clutching your notebook hard in your hands, they didn't press further. "What are you guys up to?" Ava questioned, her eyes trailing towards a few students who were looking in her direction as she sat with you and the boys, "nothing, just hanging around," Jake shrugged taking a seat. Eventually Ava sat awkwardly beside Sunghoon, and right in front of Jay after realizing he didn't tell his friends about them. She watched as Jay refused to acknowledge her presence at all and Jake and Heeseung exchanged glances at each other from time to time.

You were somehow also ignoring her presence, focusing on the reels on your phone rather than starting a conversation and Ava thinks it's maybe because she rudely left your apartment a week back and you haven't reached out to her after that. "You were going to send me a video of the recipe you saved to make that tea, you haven't sent it to me yet." Jay spoke, nudging your shoulder with his and you gave him an apologetic smile before copying the link of the video and sending it to him. Ava's eyes watched you both like a hawk, eyes narrowing at the newfound closeness in between you two. She gulped, feeling as if the perfect world she tried so hard to build was crumbling down the more she tried to save it.

"Oh shit, I forgot I had a seminar to attend, I should get going," you hurriedly zipped your bag and checked the time, cursing under your breath and running off towards the hall where the seminar would take place. "Oh she dropped her notebook," Sunghoon leaned down the grab the notebook which fell down from your lap, dusting it off, he opened the first page to look, "Give it to me, I'll pass it to her," Sunghoon turned his head towards Ava, eyes sharp and unmoving as he passed your notebook towards Jay instead. Ava sighed, eyebrows twitching at everyone's distant behavior, sure they took less liking for her somehow, even Heeseung and Jake, just acknowledged her as their bandmate's girlfriend but somehow each of them had soften themselves for you and she didn't like how you were getting more attention than she could.

"You're sure everything is alright between you two?" Gyuri questioned Ava as they stood in the locker room changing their clothes after finishing practicing, Ava gulped not maintaining eye contact with her caption as she hurried to put her things inside the bag, "you know you're only in the cheer squad because of Jay right? Since you bought so much attention towards our team after your whole secret admirer agenda?" Ava nodded, zipping up her bag, Gyuri held her shoulder, forcing Ava to face her, "try to mend things in between you both, if you were good enough with your talent alone, you wouldn’t have to enter the team through popularity, I hope you remember all the times you got rejected by different people from the team okay? But now that you finally made it into the team, try to maintain your spot."

"Yes, we are doing fine, Gyuri, we just need a little bit of space, that's it. Everything will go back to normal." Gyuri gave her a skeptical looks, not buying her reasoning at all, "you used to write all those letters to him which made him turn from icy to soft, he looked so smitten by you initially, I don't know what you did, but try to handle it properly, don't be a disappointment, I already get yelled at by our coach for allowing you in the team with the amount of mistakes you do, but I let him drag me since I know you bring attention to the team, don't do anything stupid to further taint my name, Ava." Ava sighed, leaning her head on the locker after Gyuri left. There was so much pressure on her head, she didn't know how she would even handle that.

Ava left the locker room, her feet dragging towards the main gate of the university. Her steps halted as she saw you standing few feet apart from her, you gaze trained on your phone as you sat on the stairs by the entrance of the university's building. She contemplated reaching out to you, her texts and calls left unattended since weeks, you wouldn't entertain her now, but this wasn't the time to whine over things like that, she needed your help to get out of the mess she had made, just like how you always did. Ava took a deep breath, deciding that apologizing to you and asking for your help would be the best case scenario for now, she could always deal with your attitude problem after this mess is solved. She took a step towards you but stopped when she spot Jay walking out of the music room, guitar case hanging off his shoulder and eyes turning ever so soft as they landed on you.

"I didn't think you'd still be here, your classes ended early today," He said, dropping his guitar case gently beside him, his voice casual but his eyes said otherwise. You hummed, smirking at him, "oh so you keep a tab on my schedule now?" Jay shrugged, smiling too wide for someone just having a casual conversation with a friend, "I need to look after you." You squint your eyes at him, elbowing his stomach, "I don't need anyone to look after me," Jay groaned as if your little nudge to his stomach actually hurt, "I know you don't need to be looked after, but I want to." He scooted closer to you, elbows pressing together, knees touching, you didn't move away. "Why do you always do that?" Jay questioned after sometime, "do what?" He reached up, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, thumb rubbing against your earlobe a little too long.

"You never properly hold eye contact with me." You blinked, caught off guard by his observation, Jay's gaze softened like he wanted to ask something more than that, you didn't notice the way Jay looked at you but Ava did. She stood there frozen, clutching her phone in her hand tightly, she noticed everything, the way Jay would always listen to your words attentively, how he had this soft smile on his face whenever he talked with you, how his eyes always found you despite being surrounded by a large crowd, Ava noticed everything. And as you packed your things and Jay snatched the bag from your hand and carried it on his shoulder instead, as you both walked off towards Jay's car blissfully unaware of Ava's presence, she realized, in that moment, that you weren't invisible anymore. And she hated it.

Your eyes were trained on the birthday invite sent by Ava on your phone. You both haven't talked with each other after she stormed out of your apartment, it wasn't the first time she did that, neither will it be the last time but you were done trying to save your friendship. You always apologize for things you didn't do just to protect your friendship but you couldn't let her do that repeatedly, you were done with her toxicity. But still your mind keeps on drifting towards how she'll manage to confess about her lying, if she'll be able to handle people throwing taunts at her. You didn't have to, but you felt bad for her. You looked at the following text she sent after sending the invite, 'I know we aren't on good terms but your presence would mean so much to me, especially for what I am going to do today, I will think of it as a last birthday gift from you.' You sighed, locking your phone and stood up to get ready for the party.

"Wow she really went all out for the party," Jake chuckled in amusement after he reached Ava's house, "I know right, I heard she invited more than half of the campus..." Heeseung trailed off, Sunghoon looked at Jay who had his jaw clenched as he looked at the scene in front of him, "you good bro?" Jay tore his eyes from the house and looked at Sunghoon, "It's weird, why would she invite so many people to a party where she's going to announce our breakup?" A loud gasp escaped Jake's mouth, "she's going to announce about your breakup?" Jay nodded looking at them, "she lied about those letters, they were never written by her."

"What? How did you even find that out?" Jay sighed watching his friends look at him with worried eyes, "I always felt disconnected from her, I started questioning her more about the letters but it would end up with us fighting and long story short, she confessed about her lies. I told her to tell everyone about her lies on her birthday when everyone will be present there and I will make sure no one will harass her over it and that we could part ways in peace after that." Heeseung nodded, still a bit shocked at how everything turned out, "if that's the case then it is indeed weird for her to go all out with the party."

"Let's just hope she isn't trying to pull any new stunts then," Sunghoon huffed looking at his friends, hands resting on his hips, "if she can steal someone else's identity for her greed, let's not think she is incapable of doing something mundane again." Rest of them nodded their heads, exchanging a look of wariness before making their way inside the house. Sunghoon stopped Jay from going away, one hand clutching his friend's shoulder, "Jay, I never got good vibes from Ava, don't let her get inside your head, be prepared for whatever okay? She's crazy enough. All you need is to look at me and I'll be there to help you." Jay smiled, nodding his head and assuring Sunghoon.

The party was in full swing, people were dancing around, some were already passed out on the couch, each corner of the house was crammed with people. The room smelled like sweat, alcohol and too many perfumes. Whenever you tried to move, your shoulders would brush against someone. The lights were dim but somehow harsh enough to make you squint. You had previously spotted Ava talking with her cheer squad, and called her aside to greet, give her the gift and go back into your apartment, but she stopped you, requesting you to wait since someone else called her name. Now you were standing beside the alcohol section, near the entrance of her house, waiting for an opportunity to find her alone and get done with it.

"Pretty," you didn't need to turn around to see who called you, his presence, his voice, the way you could feel his body heat on your back was enough for you to confirm who it was, "you're waiting for someone?" You nodded your head but didn't make any effort to change your position, eyes still trained on Ava who was now in the middle of celebrating her birthday. Jay stood beside her, his expressions hard as she cut her cake. She offered the piece of cake to Jay to which he just took it from her hand and fed her instead. The crowd cheered, their screams almost overpowering the music blasting through the speakers.

Then Ava signaled the DJ to pause the music, and the crowd quieted down, everyone gathered around Ava, who stood on the mini-stage along with Jay and some of her friends from the cheer team. Your heartbeat quickened but you felt a gentle squeeze on your shoulder, you looked up and Sunghoon gave you yet another squeeze of reassurance, you smiled at his gesture, a silent thank you, then you trained your eyes back on Ava, who was now looking at everyone with an anxious expression on her face as she announced she wanted to confess something to everyone. You swallowed, crossing your arms across your chest as you waited for her to continue. Jay stood beside her, eyes dark and intense but they softened slightly as he looked at you, your smile was enough to tell him you knew what was going to happen and he heaved a sigh, waiting for Ava to start speaking again.

"Thank you so much for attending my birthday and making it so much special for me," Ava smiled looking at everyone, "I am sure I won't be able to forget this birthday ever." Choruses of oohhs and aahhs spread all throughout the house, Ava shook her head, "I just want to confess something to you guys.....I've been holding it in for a while now." Everyone looked at each other, waiting for Ava to elaborate further, you watched as she looked back at Jay for a minute before her gaze turned back towards the crowd. You held your breath, anxious feelings creeping up on you as you waited for her to continue. "Everything is alright Ava?" Gyuri came forward, the rest of the crowd humming in agreement. She smiled at her, nodding her head, "I will be Gyuri." Sunghoon scoffed at her words as he leaned down towards you, "Oscar season came early huh?" You shivered as his breath hit your ears, a chuckle left his mouth watching her act.

"I feel like everyone deserves to know the truth about what's going on," you froze in your place when she stood beside Jay but her eyes locked in with yours. "The two people I trusted the most went behind my back," Ava's voice trembled as she looked at Jay, "he cheated on me," she exclaimed, pointing directly to you, "with her, my very own best friend." A ripple of gasp fluttered around the house, people glanced in your direction, whispering to each other low and biting. Tears welled up in your eyes, throat closing in, making it hard for you to defend yourself as you watched everyone look at you as if being in your vicinity made them impure.

"I trusted them, both of them but they intentionally chose to betray me like I was nothing." Your chest tightened as Ava continued her sob story of how you betrayed her, people around you started calling you names, whispers of you being a homewrecker, a whore, an attention seeking good for nothing slut, a nobody with a pretty best friend, a jealous bitch who couldn't watch her friend be happy. You shut your eyes, covering your ears with humiliation. "Avalyn!" Jay approached her, his tone dangerously even, "what the hell are you talking about?"

Sunghoon sighed as three of them made their way towards the stage where Ava and Jay were standing. Everyone's attention was fixed on the three band members who now stood at the foot of the stage as they watched the scene in front of them. Ava laughed bitterly, nose and cheeks red, and eyes glassy with unshed tears, "why are you acting innocent, I'm surely not the only one who noticed you pulling away from me, you didn't even sit next to me in cafeteria anymore, instead you were always around her, talking in whispers, about anything and everything, you think I wouldn't notice? You thought no one would believe the truth just because you're popular?"

"Oh I know you're not the one talking about popularity Ava!" All eyes turned towards Sunghoon who stepped up on the stage, eyes burning into Ava's, "you claimed to be the person who wrote those anonymous letters to Jay, you lied to everyone just so you could date Jay and get attention," everyone turned quiet, watching Sunghoon behave so rudely for the first time. Some of them turned towards you, trying to puzzle the pieces together. Jay stepped forward, grabbing Ava's arm to make her face him, "you lied to me, took advantage of someone else's words of love and used it for your selfish reasons and I pulled away from you when I caught your lie." Ava's eyes scanned everyone's face, lips trembling as she could feel everyone doubting her words, then her eyes fell upon you, her eyes darkening with anger, again.

"You're just deflecting because I caught you cheating!" She yanked her arm off his grasp, stepping back a little, "no! I'm clearing my name, if I was someone who treated relationships as casual, I would've dated countless girls and not waited for the right one!" The crowd started murmuring, words of agreement spread throughout as they realized the honesty Jay's words held, they never saw him entertain any girls before. Ava's breathing grows uneven when the room remains silent, no sympathy in their eyes, just observing, watching the drama unfold. "Are you done with your lies now? I told you we could part ways peacefully if you just confess about lying and come clean but you decided to drag me and your best friend through the mud just so you could have an upper hand."

Ava stepped closer to him, voice low but filled with venom, "you're really painting me as a villain because I claimed something that wasn't mine?" Jay stood there, his posture stiff and jaw clenched as Ava wasn't giving up, "you lied, Ava." She scoffed, tears clinging to her lashes, "but you believed me without a second thought Jay, and you believed me because you were desperate to be loved and I did just that, so how am I the villain?" You stepped back, unable to keep yourself together, the room felt too suffocating, you turned around towards the door trying to get out of the situation, to where? You didn't know, you just needed to get out of there. People watched as she spiraled more and more, concern spreading throughout the room, "and don't defend her like she needs to be saved," her voice lowered enough only Jay could hear, "she knew."

Slow smirk forming on her face, "She knew the whole truth but she chose to stay quiet." Jay froze, heart stopping at the cruel revelation, "you're lying..." but the look on Ava's face was enough for Jay to realize she wasn't lying this time. "She knew from the beginning, she watched me take the credit for those letters, watched you fall for them, and still chose to say nothing. So how are we different now?" Jay's eyes scan your figure amongst the crowd, like looking for you would give him some answers. Jay could barely hear a word coming from Ava's mouth, he felt his chest tightened, with disappointment? Betrayal? Or something else entirely? He wasn't sure.

Sunghoon leaned closer to Jay, informing him about you leaving the house. He pushed Jay down the stage so he would follow you. It took some time for him to snap out of everything and his feet started moving before his mind could catch up. Ava stood still, eyes trained on the way the crowd watched Jay run towards the door. Ava's figure trembled with anger, but underneath all the fury there was fear. Because she could see the closeness you and Jay shared couldn't be erased, not even now, now even after her lies were laid bare in front of everyone. Her feet moved, she couldn't let this moment be the one responsible for her downfall, Sunghoon grabbed her hand, pulling her back harshly, "we aren't done with you Ava," He looked back, Jake and Heeseung joining him as they cornered Ava, "can’t really let you walk away without leaving a scar for what you did to our best friend, now can we?"

Sunghoon turned towards the door, watching Jay run off towards the direction he gave him, Jay stopped when he reached the door, turning around to find himself locking eyes with Sunghoon who was holding Ava back from following him. Jay waited for him to say something, but Sunghoon just smiled, nodding his head at Jay and ushering him to follow you. Jay's lips trembled but he nodded back, turning around with newfound determination to find you. He walked down the stairs, looking around to see if he could catch a single glimpse of you, he ran his fingers through his hair, messing up the neat style he previously did. He swallowed hard, taking deep breaths, when he spotted something sparkling around the corner of the block. He ran towards that direction, praying and hoping you'd still be there.

You were walking down the sidewalk, mind too clouded and eyes too hazy to hear footsteps edging closer. You felt someone grab your hand and yank you back, then you heard the faintest whisper of your name, the voice slightly laboured, out of breath. A shiver ran down your spine at the sight of him, not expecting him to follow you out, you wanted to say something, anything but the look in his eyes, the way his lips trembled as he looked at you, the way his jaw was clenched as if he was holding something back, stopped you to saying anything further. For a moment he just looked at you, at your reddened eyes and tears stricken face but all it did was take him back a few moments ago when Ava told him the truth.

"You knew," he stated, his voice low and laced with something too broken to name, "Avalyn told me you knew she didn't write those letter, and you never told me..." your heart cracked at the slight crack in his voice as he talked, you opened your mouth but no words came out. He removed his hand from you, stepping closer till your toes touch, "all this time," he laughed bitterly, blinking a couple of times to wash away the tears that threatened to fall, "you watched me believe her, fall for a fake version of her, I trusted her, I trusted you, you're the only person with whom I shared the struggles of my relationship with, about how the letters made me feel seen, about how your best friend wasn't living up to it and you just let me?"

His words cut through you like a knife, you swallowed hard, throat dry, "it wasn't my place-" "wasn't your place?" He spat, eyes burning with betrayal and underlying heartbreak, "I thought you were my friend." Your head hung low, tears slipping down your cheeks, ashamed that you let everything spiral to this, "I'm your friend," your voice cracked, hands clenching into fist, you couldn't bring yourself to look at Jay, too guilty to feel worthy enough to do so. He shook his head as he watched you trembling in front of him, his hands itched to just pull you closer and hug you till it all started making sense. But he just shook his head instead.

The silence stretched for too long, none of you moved, your mind was swirling with hundreds of reasons you could give in order to justify your actions to him but none of them felt worthy enough to say out loud. Jay's hand trembled as they cupped your face, he placed his thumbs below your chin to tilt your face upward, "do you know how humiliating it was to find out that the entire foundation of my relationship was fake? That the girl who confessed about writing letters to me just played with my heart to get a few people to glance her way?" He wiped away the tears that fell down your cheeks, and leaned his forehead against yours, "and you? You let me believe in all of those things, you watched me make a fool of myself and didn't feel I'm worthy enough to know the truth."

Your breath hitched, hands reaching up to curl around his jacket to ground yourself, "I didn't want to hurt you Jay." He brushed his nose against you then stepped back, eyes red, hair disheveled as he narrowed his eyes at you, "isn't it too late to say that?" You closed your eyes as a choked sob escaped from your mouth, you couldn't even look at him without feeling the need to rip your heart apart. He was hurting, and he was hurting because of you. He studied you for a moment, even though every fibre of his body told him to just reach out to you, he took another step back, "I just," he ran his hand through his hair, visibly overwhelmed, "I don't know who I can trust anymore."

You opened your eyes at his words, "Jay," you started but he backed away even though you stayed glued in your spot, "wait here. Sunghoon will come and drop you off." And you watched him turn around and walk back towards Ava's house. You could see the weight of the betrayal, the disappointment, the truth weighing on his shoulders as he walked away and you stood there, watching the boy you love unraveling and breaking right in front of you. After a while, Sunghoon's car pulled up beside you and he got off, running towards where you stood, your arms circled around his waist, tears streaming down your face and sipping into his shirt. He held you close, rubbing your back to console you. The drive towards your apartment was silent, he glanced at you from time to time to check if you were doing fine. You bid him goodbye, assuring him that you'll call him if it felt too suffocating. He kissed your forehead, and pulled out of your building.

Jay was laid wide awake in his bedroom, still wearing the same clothes from the party, now slightly crumpled and disheveled. He blinked at the ceilings, recalling back to everything that led him to this moment. It felt surreal, the anonymous letters, the lie, the hope he had, the connection he shared with you, your lie, and the moment it all crashed down. He rubbed his face, groaning in his hands for being so stupid, he blamed himself for not verifying Ava's claim, for trusting her blindly. He wondered how his life would've been if he never received those letters, if he never let himself believe that someone was out there loving him the way he didn't know he needed. Maybe he got selfish after reading those letters.

He wondered how the person who originally wrote the letters must've felt after learning Ava claimed the letters as hers, about why that person never came forward to expose her lie, then his thoughts drifted to you. He still remembered the way his heart dropped when Ava told him you knew the truth all along, how even after knowing you deliberately chose to lie his heart still ached for you. How watching you crying in front of him felt like thousands of glass pieces pierced his skin, all at once. How one teary look from your eyes was enough for him to get on his knees for you. And it all confused him to no extent, he was sure he loved the person who wrote him the letters and he knew there was no one else who could see him the way they did, or make him feel the way their words did.

But now here he was, drowning in your thoughts, realization dawning upon him that even if you somehow decided to stab him with a knife, he would happily help you by placing it in the middle of his heart. That he somehow managed to fall in love with you so hard that he isn't sure what to do with his feelings. He knew he should've told you off, called you a liar, broken ties with you just like he did with Ava, because you were her best friend and you took part in her lies, that should've been the case but it wasn't. Instead, he just found himself looking for you amidst the crowd, his heart pounding and he ran off to find you, how his heart clenched at the sight of your trembling form and how relieved he felt after knowing you were safe.

He sighed, sitting up straight and switching on the lights of his room. He had been trying to sleep but he couldn't with all these thoughts running in his mind. His eyes wandered around his room as he grabbed the glass of water from his nightstand and drank it. He stopped when his eyes landed on the notebook neatly placed on his desk, your notebook, which you dropped as you rushed to attend the seminar. Despite his better judgement, his steps carried him towards his desk anyway. He picked up the notebook, fingers tracing the stem of the book, smiling softly at the little heart you drew at the corner of the cover page. He traced the heart with his thumb as if to picture you doodling it while you were thinking about something.

There wasn't a single thought behind his eyes when he opened your notebook, no suspicion, no curiosity, just a causal reach, a familiar motion which one does when they have a book in their hand. He didn't mean to see anything inside the book, but the second the pages parted and his eyes caught the words written inside, something shifted, like his heart recognized something his mind was yet to figure out. His fingers stilled against the paper, breath hitching as he looked at the pages, turning over a few more, just in case. He stumbled a bit, like the floor beneath his feet decided to slip off, and fell on his bed, he exhaled a deep breath, eyes trained on the book and your handwriting staring back at him, achingly familiar, too familiar and it hurt.

His fingers hovered over the ink, as if he felt the words would vanish if he touched them carelessly. But they didn't, they stayed, etched in the unmistakable way you write your words, the same pauses, the same rhythm. He flipped open the last page of the book and his throat tightened as he read a few lines that were scribbled recklessly, the handwriting a bit messy as if you wanted to hold onto the words before they disappeared from your head. Lines he recognized instantly, the one he knew he had read before, not in your notebook but in one of the letters that are neatly tucked inside the box. He grabbed the box and searched for the letters where you wrote those exact same lines dedicated to him. Keeping them side by side.

'I think you look the best as the sun sets, the sun's rays kissing your face in a gentle goodbye. Even the ground beneath you looks beautiful coated in your silhouette, and I wonder if I'll ever be able to stop seeing that version of you when I close my eyes.' He remembered those lines, he remembered how you wrote that you watched him enter the campus with his bandmates as he laughed at something his friends said, how you watched him till he disappeared from your sight from the library's crooked window, how you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by how beautiful he looked and how deeply you were falling for him. His hands trembled as he clutched the notebook in his hands and made his way towards his car, towards you. He couldn't wait till next morning to talk to you, not after everything you both have been through, not after all the wait and longing.

You were sitting on your couch, hands in your hair, regretting everything that led you to this moment. All you wanted was to express your love for a person who helped you when you were at your lowest, a quiet support to let him know he wasn't alone. You still recalled writing him your first letter after you heard his parents berate him for choosing a musical career instead of their family business, they way his shoulders slumped, how hurt embraced him like an old friend. All you wanted was to let him know that he's loved, he's seen, and that his struggles aren't invisible. And maybe you did reach your goal, made him feel all the things you intended on making him feel but then everything shattered, like a twisted fairytale. And here you were, replaying it all, wishing you'd never sent those letters to him to spare him from the hurt that now made home in his eyes.

You wiped the tears that streamed down your cheeks, they seemed to be never ending, you'd sit for a while, blankly staring at nothing in particular then a sudden wave of emotions would dawn on you and tears would well up. You didn't try to stop them, didn't try to think of something that would numb all the pain. You deserved it, after all you had chosen to side with Ava instead of correcting her mistakes, so you let yourself feel, let yourself cry, let yourself hurt. You stood up, deciding to let sleep distract you from your feelings for a few hours would be a good option, you didn't want to bother Sunghoon with your feelings, he already did so much for you.

You turned around towards your bedroom, stopping mid-step as the echo of your doorbell bounced off your apartment walls. You frowned, wondering who would be visiting you at this hour. Still, you made your way towards the door, and opened it without a second thought, Jay stood in front of you, breathless, eyes red, then your eyes fell upon something he was holding tight in his hand. A notebook, yours to be specific. He didn't say anything right away, just stared at you as your brain pieced together the puzzle. You tilted your head upward, heart racing as you looked at him when a voice at the back of your head chimed in, he knows.

You weren't sure what to expect now that your secret has been revealed, you didn't not expect to see him again so soon, especially not with your notebook clutched in his hand at least. He walked towards you, and you wordlessly backed away to give him space, he hesitated before reluctantly stepping forward and keeping the book on the table by your entrance, "you left this behind," he mumbled, looking towards the notebook and not you, his voice hoarse as if it had been scratched. Then he turned towards you, stepping forward till there was no space left for you to go, "I read it." You swallowed, heart thundering inside your chest, "why did you? It was you....all this time....you." You inhaled sharply, mind racing with countless of things you could say to make this situation less messy and complicated than it had become, but before you could speak, he closed the distance, almost desperately, almost as if staying one second away from you was eating him up alive.

His lips met yours, not softly, not hesitantly. His fingers tangled in your hair, another one snaking around your waist to pull you close. Your hands found home on his shoulders, gasping at the sheer shock of it all. He kissed you like it was his elixir, the only thing that made the ache in his heart subsidize for a while. The kiss was everything, pain, longing, anger, love, all wrapped into one reckless moment of affection. He pulled back enough for both of you to breathe the air but not far enough that you'd miss his touch. His hand was still tangled in your hair, he gave it a gentle tug to tilt your head towards him, "I'm so fucking mad at you," his lips brushed against yours as he uttered those words, low and seething, "but I've never wanted anything else more than this."

He stepped back while you were still frozen in one place, his kiss lingering on your lips like a confession and goodbye at the same time. You opened your eyes, your breathing shallow, a little bit shaky as you watched him pace around your living room. You hesitated reaching out for him, like if you moved quickly the moment would shatter and vanish like it never happened in the first place. "Jay," you started, softly this time, fearing he would stop you yet again and leave you hanging, when he didn't, you took it as a sign to continue, "I never meant for you to know it's me." He stopped, his back turned towards you, "but I needed to..." turning around and stepping closer to you, "I needed to know it was you." Your lips trembled, you looked down to prevent him from watching you break yet again.

His hand reached up to cup your face, other reaching forward to hold your hand, "I was so angry," he breathed, leaning his forehead on yours, "At Ava, at you, at myself. I thought maybe all of it was just a fragment of my imagination, that none of this was real." You blinked, nodding your head, unsure of whether this is where he leaves or forgives you, "but then I saw this notebook, your handwriting, and I knew it was real, that you are real." Tears pricked your eyes but you blinked them back. "Why didn't you tell me?" He questioned, his nose brushing against yours, "I didn't tell you because I never thought you'd ever see me that way."

He kissed away the tears that managed to escape your eyes, your heart swelling with emotions at the softness of his actions, "don't say that, you don't get to decide how I feel about you, about us." He kissed your forehead, staying there for a beat or two, "I was looking for someone who was by my side the whole time, who made me feel seen, yet I was blind enough to never recognize the calm I felt in your presence was so achingly familiar."

"I never planned on coming out of the shadows, Jay. I just wanted to love you from afar, because I felt someone like me would never be able to keep up with someone like you. But Ava changed everything and I couldn't do anything about it. I tried warning her, but you looked so happy when she confessed that I couldn’t bring myself to tell the truth." You choked a sob, leaning your head on his shoulder as you cried. He held you close, kissing your head as he tried to blink back his own tears. "I fell in love with your words first, but it was your presence that made me fall deeper." And then without another word, he pulled you in for another kiss, soft and slow before it turned into something hungrier and needy.

"You said you weren't sure if I wanted you right?" He mumbled, not breaking the kiss, he pushed you towards your bedroom, a soft gasp leaving your lips at the abrupt movement, he took it as an opportunity to ease his tongue in your mouth, exploring, carving and claiming every corner of you as his, "let me show you how much I want you." His kisses trailed down from your mouth, to your jaw, his hand tilting your head slightly to pepper kisses down your throat. Your hand clutched his shirt, other sliding up from his chest to the nape of his neck and pulling his hair lightly. He groaned against your neck, sending shivers down your spine, his tongue lapping at your sweet spot. You moaned, he took it as a sign to suck on the same spot till a mark bloomed on it.

He pulled away, your body trembling as the air hit the spot where he licked. "You want me to show you?" He whispered, giving you a chance to back out if this isn't what you wanted, you gulped, taking a step closer, lips hovering above his, just enough, enough to drive him crazy with the distance, enough to have him begging for more, "yes," you sighed against his lips before grabbing his collar and pulling him down for another kiss. His hands travelled down from your neck, to your waist and finally they settled down low on your hips, pulling you closer so you could feel his hardening length against your thigh. You bit his bottom lip in response, which pulled a hiss from his mouth, hands tightening around your hips like he didn't want you to stop.

You felt his hand knead on the skin at the swell of your ass, your hands curling around his neck to bring him closer. He tapped your thigh, once, twice while leaning down and you took it as a sign to jump as he gave you support and carried you. Your legs wrapped around his waist and he pushed your body against the wall. He pulled away from the kiss, a string of saliva connecting your lips making him moan. He looked at you with a heavy, drunk in euphoria stare, a lopsided smile adorning his face as he took in your form, breathing heavily, cheeks flushed, hair messy and swollen lips. He decided it was one of his favorite looks.

His hand slid up from your waist, to your chest, stopping briefly to see you whimper before it reached your neck. He curled his finger around your neck, giving it a firm squeeze and you whined, throwing your head back, legs instinctively tightening around his hips. He smirked, leaning closer, "I need you to use your voice for me, butterfly. You think you could do that for me?" You nodded your head, aroused by the intensity of it all. He gave your neck another squeeze, a bit more firm, like a warning, "use your words, butterfly." You moaned, eyes rolling back, "yes." He smiled, releasing his hold from your neck and giving your neck a gentle kiss, "good girl."

Your hands that rested on his shoulders, rose up to cradle his face as he continued to lick, suck and bite your neck. You tilted his head, reconnecting your lips with his as if you couldn't just get enough of it. He groaned, one hand sliding at the nape of your neck to deepen the kiss and the other pressing into the skin of your arm, squeezing the flesh to anchor himself. He traced his tongue on your lips, before capturing your lips again, biting at the skin, silently asking you to let him in. His fingers then pulled at the hem of your top, tugging at it impatiently, you broke off the kiss, pulling the top over your head and throwing it somewhere in the room. His pupils dilated, hunger creeping in as he looked at you like he had been starving.

You swallowed hard, for the first time in your life you were watching someone unravel because of you without even doing anything wild. His ragged breath made you bold, you ran your fingers through his scalp before grabbing a fistful of hair and tugging it. He moaned, his lips attaching to the unmarked area of your chest, his hands sliding up and stopping just below the swell of your breast, "is this okay butterfly? Can I touch you here?" You whined, arching your chest, needy for his touch, "please," you whispered, almost as if it physically pained you because he wasn't touching you and he sighed, biting his lips and reaching up to squeeze your boobs.

"Let me take this off," His hands found the clasp of your bra, detaching it in one swift motion, he pulled the bra off of you and threw it down. Your eyes widened, low-key impressed by his 'bra-removing-expertise' but your train of thoughts broke off just as you felt his lips on your nipple, he liked it, then blew air on it, sending shiver throughout your body, his hand softly massaging the other one. You closed your eyes, leaning your head against the wall as he switched between both of your boobs, heat pooling between your legs, begging for attention. He took his time with your boobs, relishing at the sound of your soft sighs. He licked up your neck, placing a slow kiss on it, you grind your hips against his, a groan ripping out of his throat at the sudden sensation. His hands supported your back as he turned around and walked towards the bed, gently laying you down.

He stood at the foot of the bed, his eyes roaming on your half-naked self, he climbed up, gulping at the sight before him, "so beautiful." Your hands instinctively cross over your chest, frown appearing on his face at your actions, "don't be embarrassed, it's just me." He hovered over you, hands on your side, he removed your arms from your chest, dipping his head low and placing gentle kisses all over your chest, mumbling sweet nothings in between. Your hands fists the sheets, as he moved lower, his eyes trained on the way your expression changed with every movement of his. He stopped as he reached near the waistband of your shorts, sucking and marking the area around your hips. Your breath shuddered, eyes closing.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Your body relaxed as you felt Jay's voice vibrate through the skin of your stomach, you looked at him, hands on both sides of your hips as he found home in between your legs, chin propped up on your stomach, pupil blown wide as he waited for your answer. You ran your fingers through his hair, a small smile gracing your lips before the heat in between your legs became too much to handle, "yes, love." He got up, sitting on his knees as he started removing his shirt. You reached up, rising slightly to help him, eager to have him close. He threw his shirt somewhere near the bed, you sat up, trailing kisses from his torso to his chest. He tangled his fingers on your hair, not pulling, just holding. His eyes met with your lust filled one and you bit on his nipple, then placed a kiss, he moaned, loud enough that he surprised himself, and he pushed you back on the bed, connecting his lips back to yours.

His hands travelled down your body, squeezing, gripping, tracing, the skin beneath his hands, "you're so soft, butterfly." His fingers dig inside the waistband of your shorts, your breath hitched in anticipation, he looked at you once before he pulled both your shorts and panties off of you, together, in one swift motion. You tried closing your legs, the air around you feeling cool against the slick in between your folds. "You're dripping butterfly, all this for me?" He dipped down, fingers separating your folds to get a better look at your dripping hole, you whined, clenching around nothing as his words went straight into your core. His breath fanning against your folds, he slid up two of his fingers on your slit, your hips jolting with surprise, legs shaking.

He kept an eye on your face, in case you felt uncomfortable, he rubbed your clit in small circles, your legs digging in the bed, back arching. Your hand gripped his shoulder, the other one holding the wrist of his hand which was making you see stars. "I'll be putting a finger in love," he waited for your reply then carefully inserted his middle finger inside your hole, you gasped, lead lifting off the pillow, his head dipped down, capturing your lips in his to help you get distracted. He started moving his finger when you let out a strained whine, his movements slow and steady as he waited for your body to adjust to the feeling. "So good, Jay." He smiled at your words, carefully inserting his index finger and curling them inside you to test out the waters.

"Jay," you moaned, eyes rolling back, he continued his movements, increasing his pace, he could feel your walls clenching around his fingers, "damn love, you're doing so good for me." Your chest rose and fell, heart racing, mind filled with pleasure, you could feel a knot forming in your stomach, "Jay, I think- I think I'm gonna cum," Jay smiled at you, already feeling your release close before you even said anything, "yeah? Cum all over my fingers butterfly, make a mess." You nodded, brows furrowing at the overwhelming feeling, "shit, Jay don't stop," your breath shuttered, pleasure washing over you. Jay's movements slowed down, his eyes trained on the way your juices coated his fingers, his head dipped down, licking a long strip on your pussy, your hands flew onto his head, pulling at his hair at the sudden action.

His fingers gain their pacing again, as his tongue works on your clit, "Jay, it's too much, I can't." He groans when he feels you pull at his hair, "you can do it love, give me another one please." He laps at your pussy, eating it like it's his last meal, his hips slightly rut against the bed, aching to get some friction, you bite your lips, trying to supress your moans with how good he's making you feel and it's not long before you come undone again. He removed his fingers from your pussy and you whined at the empty feeling, you watched as he looked at you before putting his fingers at his mouth and licking them clean. His hands then spread your legs wider, tongue darting out to lick you clean. You shiver, legs closing around his head, feeling overstimulated after cumming twice, he laps at your pussy, smiling at you when he's done.

You pull the waistband of his jeans, a little impatient but eager to help him with his needs, "take it off." He chuckled at your needy tone as he removed his jeans and boxer, his hardened lock slapping against his abs. You gulped, mouth salivating at the sight, he looked so gorgeous as he kneeled before you, eyes closing momentarily as he stroked himself lightly, spreading his precum on his length. He climbed over you, his cock slapping against your thigh. He sighed, wiping the sweat dripping off your forehead and removing the hair sticking on your face. "So beautiful, could eat you out for hours, butterfly, you taste so good." You flush at his words, slapping his chest lightly, he laughed, leaning up to place a chaste kiss on your forehead.

He rubbed his cock against your fold to gather you slick, his hands placed on either side of your head, one of your hands held his shoulder while the other ran through his hair. He kissed you, gentle and soft as he lined himself up in your entrance, your breath hitched at the mere contact, legs tightening beside his waist, he groaned against the kiss, his hand sliding down to keep your legs open wide as he pushed himself in you, slow and steady. You hissed, feeling his tip enter your dripping cunt, he kissed you all throughout, mumbling words of encouragement and praises in between as he slowly bottomed out inside you. "Fuck butterfly, you're so fucking tight around me, it's like you're sucking me in, love."

You whimpered, feeling full, he looked at you, showering kisses across your face till you adjusted to his size so he could move. "Tell me when you'll be ready, okay love? Take your time." You nodded your head, kissing and marking his neck to distract yourself from momentary pain, his neck chain shining, against your face, "please move, Jay, fuck." He gave you a peck before pulling out of your pussy all the way, then sliding back in, in one swift motion. Your back arched, as a strangled moan left your lips. His hands trembled just hearing you moan right next to his ears. The sounds are going straight in his cock.

He pulled out, only to thrust back in, slow and deep, his eyesbrows furrowed as he tried his best not to lose control and fuck you senseless. You moaned, your walls clenching around his length, his chain hitting your face in the same rhythm his hips snapped against yours. "Faster, please." He leaned his head on yours, his movements steady as he smirked at you, "you want it faster my love?" You nodded frantically, and he bit your lip as he adjusted himself to increase his pace. He started slamming his length into you faster, and harder and with the way your walls were trying to suck him into you, he knew you were close. One of his hands slid down your body to rub circles around your clit to heighten your pleasure.

"Ah fuck, Jay!" He smirked as you held onto him like your life depended on it, "you're taking me so well baby, this pussy," he groaned, hand never stopping their movement on your clit, "made for me." You whined, nails digging on his shoulders, his chain repeatedly hitting your face, you frowned tilting your head up and parted your lips, and as the chain hit your face again, you trapped it between your teeth, Jay froze at he felt a abrupt tug on his neck, looking down towards you he breathed out a pained sigh, completely unraveling. His hips recovered their pace, hips slamming against yours. You released the chain and he dipped his head to suck your nipple.

"Fuck, Jay, I'm close so close," He released your nipple only to focus on the other one, "me too, I'm close too butterfly, cum with me, cover me with your juices, love, fuck." His movements became sloppy, losing the rhythm as he fucked you recklessly, you moaned one last time as your orgasm washed over you, he rode you through your high before spilling his seeds inside of you, long spruts if cum dripping out of his cock, you whined feeling the heat of his cum spilling inside if you. "I love you," you opened your eyes to see smiling down at you, the soft glow of your bedroom light framed him in gold, casting a quiet halo around his body, he chuckled lightly, wiping the tear that escaped your eyes without even you knowing, your lips trembled, "I love you too."

He closed his eyes, dropping his weight on you as he hugged you close, burying his face on your neck, still buried deep inside you. You hugged his shoulders, massaging his scalp as both of you regained your breath. "Come one, let me clean you up so we can sleep." You whined at his words and he chuckled, scooping you in his arms instead and took you inside the bathroom to clean you and himself up. You shuddered as he cleaned your pussy, feeling overstimulated and sore. He mumbled quick apologies, cleaning himself up, changing the sheets and climbing up on the bed with you to finally sleep.

The hallway is empty, save for a few students who are scattered across in little groups, you're sitting inside the empty classroom, gathering your belongings as you texted Jay that you'll be heading to his house soon. A small smile gracing up on your face at the mere thought of spending time with him. You're so busy with yourself that you don't hear her approach you. But the moment a pair of heels come into view, you glance up and Ava is already looking down at you, standing in front of you like she had been searching for you all day. Her eyes are red, almost as if she had been crying all week, her perfect hair frying at the edges, but it's her eyes, raw, wild and angry, you stand up.

"You're such a great actress," she says, low and seething as she looked at you, "you wrote those letters and let me play the role of a fool as I claimed to be the one who wrote your letters. You let me be the thief." You opened your mouth but she cut you off, stepping forward, every movement sharp with fury, "was this your ultimate plan? To humiliate me? Let me take the fall so you could step on me and reclaim the spot as yours?" Your eyebrow twitched, words flying off of your mind at her accusations, "No!" You sharply declined, stepping towards her instead of backing away like you always did, "you don't get to play the victim here Ava, you did this all upon yourself. Yes I wrote those letters, yes I let you claim it as yours but I did it for Jay."

You stood tall, having enough of her tantrums and manipulation, "I did it because he looked so happy when I saw him with you. You didn't ask me when you claimed those letters as yours, I even warned you but you are so selfish, you only think about yourself." She laughed, eyes squinting, "you let me live in the spotlight while you sat there watching me like some pathetic loser, what does that make me now?" Her voice crumbled, not from pain but from fury, "nothing, that's what I am now! I lost Jay, I lost my spotlight, I lost....you. and you were supposed to be someone who would never leave." Your heart broke watching her breakdown in front of you but you knew better.

"You were mine, my best friend, my shadow. You weren't supposed to overtake me, you were supposed to stay behind me!" She stepped closer, but you stepped back, she froze, realization hitting her on the face that the power she once had on you is over now. "You don't complain when you make your own plate, Ava. I warned you but you never listened. I stayed with you even when I knew you were using me to satisfy your ego, I thought you'd change but no, you don't care about anyone else but you and your image, and now that you've lost it, you're trying to manipulate me into thinking I was at fault. You wouldn't be in this situation if you never lied." She laughed, "wow, you really are the cruel one," she whispered. She stepped back, her heels echoing off the empty classroom and she left. And you were left standing there, watching her go out of your classroom and your life.

"Yeah yeah, I'll be there soon," Jay replied to Heeseung while packing his things inside his bag. He was currently in the music room of the university while everyone else was waiting for him to join them at a hangout spot they usually go to, the bridge that overlooks a river. He hung up the phone, his screen blinking with Heeseung's contact photo. He shook his head, locking his screen and continuing with his actions. He looked around to check if he forgot anything when he noticed he left his music book on the table, he grabbed the book hurriedly before placing it inside his bag.

An envelope fell down from his book due to his frantic movements and he stopped, crouching down to pick it up. His chest fluttered when he opened it, a handwriting which he had seen countless times appearing in front of his eyes, he smiled in amusement, wondering when you put this letter inside his book. He opened the letter anyway, deciding that waiting till the day was over would be too much for his curious heart.

My Jay,

If you look into my eyes, you'll find me thanking the heavens for blessing you in my life, smiling at the thought that I was lucky to have you, thinking about how I ended up with you.

If you look into my eyes, you'll find me looking for you everywhere I go, trying to trace your face amongst the crowd, yearning for being in your presence.

If you look into my eyes, amidst all the lingering eyes and subtle glances, you'll find me staring at you, watching you giggle, and when I get caught, I look away hiding my blush.

If you look into my eyes, you'll see how much your presence affects me, wanting to be the center of your universe. If I could, I would spend eternity with you.

If you look into my eyes, you'll find me clutching onto our dreams, a bit insecure about our future, still determined to take the tempting risk.

If you look into my eyes, you'll find how deeply I'm into you, so much so to the point I sometimes scare myself, thinking about how hard life would be without you.

If you look into my eyes, you'll find me standing by the river, gently letting the wind engulf my heart, looking at you longingly as you try your best not to fall.

If you look into my eyes, you'll see a tired soul, just wanting to love and to be loved, wondering if you feel it the way I do.

If you look into my eyes, you'll feel the love that pours out of me, just look up and stare directly at my eyes, you'll find me clutching at our dreams.

If you look into my eyes, you'll find yourself.

Yours,

Butterfly.

PS: I know you're wondering when I put this letter inside, but you'd never know, I'm kind of very good at this whole secret admirer agenda. Don't expect anything else, just because I'm dating you doesn't mean these letters will stop. I'm very much in love with you, but there are still some moments where I'm too shy to say what I want to say, but I need you to know how much I love you, so these letters are my armour. I wrote this for you recently, and I wanted you to read that!

He smiled, feeling warmth spread all throughout him as he folded the letter and put it inside the envelope, making a mental note to keep it inside the box when he reached back home. He sighed, content at how things have turned out. He still had a long way to go with his parents but you were by his side now, so he was glad he wouldn't have to face it alone. He felt at peace with you, never felt the need to say much. He was zoned out, drowning in his thoughts when his phone rang again, he snapped out of his thoughts, answering Heeseung's calls, "I'm done bro, I was just leaving."

"How many fingers can you see?" You glared at Jake, who currently stood beside you holding up 4 fingers in front of your face, "four," you muttered through gritted teeth, you could hear Heeseung chuckle from behind you, which annoyed you more. You put your glasses back, shoving Jake's shoulders. "You can see, why do you need glasses," you rubbed your temple, sighing in disappointment, "I'm not THAT blind, I just need them to see more clearly, stupid." Jake looked at you like you had just committed a crime against his dignity, "woah, did you just call me stupid? After all the love and affection I shower you with?" He placed a hand on his heart, staggering back a step, "me? The one who puts up with you squinting at traffic lights?"

Your mouth fell open at his words, you lurched forward, attempting to grab his precious hair as he didn't seem to back down from his teasing you. Heeseung laughed at both of you, clutching his stomach, beside him Sunghoon just shook his head, an amused smile plastered on his face as he stepped forward to separate Jake from your fury. "See, and you wonder why I call her trouble!" You stuck your tongue out at Jake, who was trying to make his hair more presentable after you messed it, trying to win an argument like a five year old, which worked somehow because Jake whined, clearly more irritated.

Jake gave you a side eye before turning around dramatically and walked off, joining Heeseung and complaining about how mean you are and how you never seem to return the love he showers you with, and how he feels that his best friend's agenda is one sided and you never considered him as such. You laughed at him, and he threw you an annoyed glance. You heard Sunghoon clear his throat from behind you and you turned around, standing beside him, overlooking the river as both of you leaned against the railing. "You know," you turned your head in his direction, but he wasn't looking at you, instead focusing his eyes on the view in front of him, "you used to make my heart race, at some time." You saw him swallow, a soft smile adorning his face, your heart skipped a beat, but you still hummed in response, "now you make me question your maturity level on a daily basis."

You gasped in mock offense, turning your head back at the river flowing gently in front of you, "excuse you, I just reciprocate the energy people give me." He chuckled, his fang-like teeth making an appearance, "whatever helps you sleep at night pretty." You pout at his words, bumping your shoulder with his playfully, he bumps back, just enough to make you slightly wobble on your spot. "Hey! I could've fallen," you whined, holding onto the railing tightly as if he would try to bump into you again, "don't worry, I would have fallen with you before letting you do it alone." You felt your heart tightened at his words but when you looked at him, you could see a teasing glint in his eyes, like he knew those words would make you stumble a bit.

You shook your head, smiling softly at his words, "see I don't doubt your words but I was hoping you'd just pull me back instead of falling with me." He chuckled at your words, ruffling your hair before retracting his hand back. "I'm glad it's you," He mumbled after sometime, "with Jay, I mean." He was already looking at you when you turned your head towards him, the wind messing his hair. You smiled, feeling warmth spread over you, "and I'm glad, you are still beside me." He nodded, tearing his eyes away from you, "I know....I think I'm exactly where I am supposed to be." You gulped, still looking at his face, you could see he wanted to say something more, so you just nudged his shoulder and arched your eyebrows at him.

It got quiet for a second, wind flowing through your hair as you stood with him in silence yet it was enough, for you both, it would always be enough, "I think some part of me loved you even before I realized it, you're good, a steady kind of good, the type where I know I could lean on you and never have to worry about falling apart." You nodded, biting your lips at his sudden confession, "and I loved you, not in the way like I love Jay, but something just as real, something I still do." His smile turned a little melancholic but still held the same warmth nonetheless, "I'm glad at the way things turned out, that you got Jay just how you wanted, it pained me to watch him be with Ava, second guessing everything in his life." You exhaled, memories resurfacing in front of your eyes, "you pushed me towards him when all you wanted was to hold me, it's something which I will never forget, Hoon."

"Oh, this dangerously looks like someone is trying to bond without me," you both turn around at the voice, you don't move but you're already grinning like a lovesick fool, the wind mess with your hair lightly and Sunghoon just smiles like he had been waiting for Jay to make his entrance. "Relax, lover boy, she's still yours." Jay rolled his eyes at Sunghoon's words, making his way towards where you stood and sliding his arms around both of your shoulders, pulling you both in. "We were just talking," you grinned, nuzzling into his warmth, "talking huh?" He teased, playing with your ear. Sunghoon snorted, clearly amused at the exchange, "yeah talking, want me to narrate everything to you so you'd feel included?"

Jay shook his head as Sunghoon leaned his head on his shoulder, "trouble comes in pairs in my life." You and Sunghoon laughed at his words, not really defending his claim, then Jay sighed, a content smile gracing on his lips, "lucky for me though, I'm clingy and not emotionally constipated." You scrunch your nose in response, just as Sunghoon faked his cough, "and humble too, apparently," you joked, rolling your eyes though you had a fond smile on your face. "Seriously though..." Jay trailed off, kissing your temple as you hand reached up to give his hand a gentle squeeze, "I don't think I've ever felt this steady in my life, like I know even if the world around me starts to spin I've got people who would have my back."

"And we've got your back too," Heeseung replied, standing beside Sunghoon, who then draped his hand on Heeseung's shoulder, while Jake joined your side, his hands interlocking yours as he looked at everyone, "Wow, this shit almost made me cry." Everyone groaned, nagging at him for ruining the moment. "It's so stupid, but I feel so lucky right now," Jay chuckled, biting back his emotions. "You're definitely stupid, but hey at least you're self aware," Heeseung laughed, looking at everyone with softness. Jay shook his head as he dramatically sighed, "I take it back, I'm not lucky, I'm doomed." Sunghoon chimed in, not missing a beat, "you still chose us, real tragic."

Jay threw his head back, mumbling quiet curses and you all laughed at him, Heeseung stepped forward, reaching up to ruffle Jay's hair, and Jay groaned, fighting with him to ruin his hairstyle too. Jake slid his arm around your shoulder and Sunghoon turned his back towards where Jay and Heeseung were fighting and leaned against the railing, you sighed, relaxing under Jake's hold, "you still love us though." Jay's eyes found you, before they landed on the other boys, he watched all of you look at him with expectant eyes, waiting for him to say something in retaliation, but deep down they knew Jay would never disagree with you so with a frustrated groan he mumbled, "unfortunately, I do."

#rae♡#mrsjjongstby #siyalogue #idlyg #idlyg spoiler

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danwhobrowses · 3 days ago

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So ever since it was confirmed that the upcoming Daggerheart live show in Exandria would be involving Bell's Hells I've been looking through the current content to see how BH will be reskinned into the Daggerheart setting. Bearing in mind that Daggerheart, being still very new to the block and not having all the expansions and exceptions that Critical Role has utilised and tweaked in 5e, has its own set of strict-ish rules regarding character creation.

While I know I'm not the first to do this I did fall into a small theory, if you're willing to take the scenic route XD

So for starters we should look at what we have already. Like many others my curiosity of converting Bell's Hells from 5e to Daggerheart stemmed from BH having a litany of passive abilities that don't appear to gel with Daggerheart cleanly. So we start by covering what can be covered.

Firstly, we have to consider the levels. Since Daggerheart levels go up to 10 rather than 20 (if you want to read how I expected BH could shape up in a 5e Lv20 state you can read this), the safe bet is that the live show will put BH at Daggerheart's Level 8, the early Tier 4 for single classes, which would sit around Level 16 for 5e. This will probably be the zone which the live show will take place since Bell's Hells ended the campaign at Level 15 (gaining 2 temporary levels from the Matron for the Predathos fight), and it provides room for the max level variations of BH to be presented in a future one-shot. With that in mind this is how I would predict each character would set up with the information we know from Daggerheart already;

Orym: Orderborne Halfling, Level 8 (Tier 4) Call of the Brave Warrior

Dorian: Highborne Skykin, Level 8 (Tier 4) Troubadour Bard

Imogen: Hearthborne Human, Level 8 (Tier 4) Elemental Origin Sorcerer

Laudna: Freeborne Human, Level 6 (Tier 3) Hedge Witch & Level 2 (Tier 2) Pact of the Endless Warlock

Braius: Orderborne reskinned Firbolg, Level 5 (Tier 3) Divine Wielder Seraph & Level 3 (Tier 2) Wordsmith Bard

Fearne: Wildborne Faun, Level 6 (Tier 3) Warden of the Elements Druid & Level 2 (Tier 2) Nightwalker Rogue

Ashton: Slyborne Earthkin, Level 8 (Tier 4) Stalwart Guardian

Chetney: Warborne Gnome, Level 6 (Tier 3) Wayfinder Ranger & Level 2 (Tier 2) Executioner's Guild Assassin

At the time of initially writing this, we didn't have the new bundle of content added to the Void on June 24th, which did cut out a lot of my explaining and arguments for what would replace a Genasi and Gnome - I also didn't want to delve into stats and Domain cards because, well, you guys don't have all day.

In terms of Multiclassing, I've put all multiclassers into Tier 2 for their secondary class simply because it gives them more domain cards to use, even it's just a Level 1 or 2 card, but I can see Chet, Laudna, and Braius doing a singular dip into multiclass instead, given that the class doesn't offer as much as the 5e multiclass does and you're only limited to one Multiclass - which could make characters like FRIDA difficult to cross over.

The addition of newer communities led to me changing my choices for Laudna, Imogen, and Chetney (of whom I chose Underborne for Laudna and Chet and Loreborne for Imogen), while the new Witch class - following the still in beta Warlock class - seems to benefit Laudna more than the Sorcerer does, with her more focused around the spooky and communing parts of her 5e Shadow Sorcery subclass. I also swapped Chet's Syndicate Rogue for the other new class: Assassin. Although like Laudna it appears to be a departure from their 5e classes, Assassin seems to focus more on the offensive elements of 5e's Rogue rather than the evasive and persuasive that DH's Rogue leans more towards - which also suits Fearne more than Assassin does. While I am aware that there is a Faerie ancestry, I also felt that Fearne could easily stick as a Faun and just use her Fey upbringing as an Experience, that way her fey traits can be utilized when required such as charming or causing trickery or pickpocketing Ashton or whoever has one of those eggs she covets. Chet's build could work as a Warrior too but I felt Ranger was probably the more diverse option for him - plus Orym has it covered - to aid with his Lycanthrope abilities and tracking skills, but this too can be subject to change. Imogen I kept as Elemental Origin for the Lightning usage, while she could dip into a Moon Witch class it would depend on whether Imogen would want to commune with the only entity she's connected to - Predathos - in such a way.

It is curious that Daggerheart does not yet have a Blood Hunter equivalent, however, given how they invented the class for 5e - along with 5e-compliant Gunslinger, Oath of the Open Sea, Way of the Cobalt Soul, Sympathy Domain, and Path of Fundamental Chaos subclasses. But while the Void has added new content to the core Daggerheart ruleset to better fit the builds of the characters of Exandria, there are a few glaring gaps to take into account. While some things can probably worked around such as familiars for Fearne and Laudna (we are not going to have Bell's Hells without Mister or Pate after all) and Chet's werewolf/hybrid forms, it isn't as easy to neatly copy over all the abilities, boons, and core skillsets synonymous with Bell's Hells and their style of play. The key character for this is Ashton; Guardians don't have a Rage equivalent and Unstoppable is only for a limited time once per Long Rest, so it is not so easy to bake in Ashton's Chaos bursts and Dunamancy abilities into Daggerheart as it is, and work would need to be done to rewrite the rules of theirs and Fearne's Primordial Titan forms with the boons and cost reflecting similarly to how they did in the campaign - or scaled to how they would've scaled under 5e's rules. Significant additions could also need to be applied for Imogen's always-active telepathy and lingering Exaltant powers, not to mention Laudna's entrapping of her patron - which would affect the Favor mechanic of the Warlock class.

While Bell's Hells as characters will act the same way in a Daggerheart setting, the changes and transition from 5e to Daggerheart can affect the way they approach problems or adversaries and that risks making the characters feel off from how they usually are - for instance, since the loadout is only 5 cards, the casters are very limited in their spellcasting, and the likes of Imogen and Laudna will end up needing to have a magic weapon equipped that they didn't have before. So I wondered to myself, why choose Bell's Hells for this Daggerheart in Exandria one-shot? When you think about it, Vox Machina does seem better equipped to transition into the new ruleset - especially now that Gnomes are covered - alternatively, the Menagerie could easily exist in Exandria too, or they could've just done fresh characters from Exandria and fans would still show up and love it. So why Bell's Hells? And I think it's because there's still more yet to be released.

My theory is that either before or during this Daggerheart live show, Daggerheart's first expansion will be unveiled: an Exandria Expansion.

Whether it's announced for the Void or a physical copy all ready to go, I can see this expansion filling the gaps for most of what Bell's Hells are unable to cleanly cover right now; transformative states or curses external from class and/or ancestry, friends and familiar sheets to add as a companion or summon, Campaign Frames for different eras and regions of Exandria or adventures like they did in 5e with Call of the Netherdeep, special equipment such as the Vestiges or unique equipment to PCs like Percy's guns and other inventions, Beau's Bo (bow optional), Yasha's Greatswords, Veth's crossbows, Gambolcleft, Turmoil, and Ashton's Hammer (bow also optional). CR-based magic and technology such as Dunamancy (which could be worked into a domain available for all classes if done right or simply its own additional loadout), Residuum, and Brumestone could also be included, and maybe even adding more new classes - if I were to make a guess; Blood Hunter and Artificer equivalents, or a Gunslinger equivalent for Percy and the Colossus of the Drylands campaign frame. We may even get more ancestries introduced through CR like Uniya, Reilora, and Bormodo, perhaps even subdivisions of ancestries such as Half-Elves, Half-Orcs, and altered Humans, or more beastfolk equivalents for Minotaurs, Centaurs, Kobolds, Kenku, and Eisfuura/Aarakocra. We could even get CR-based artwork on existing cards just for additional flavour, and themed dice.

If this ends up being a reality, this will probably allow an easier understanding of how Bell's Hells will shape up and transition into Daggerheart. While some things may still need reskinning, reshuffling, or just pure homebrewing, I doubt Critical Role would choose Bell's Hells for this task if they didn't feel that they could blend into this new ruleset smoothly. A fluid transition to Daggerheart from 5e will also prove its flexibility for veteran or hesitant 5e players and help bring Critical Role fully into Daggerheart's style of play for potentially Campaign 4.

Maybe more information or elaboration will come later down the line, and maybe the group will even do a Session 0 to show the process of their characters' Daggerheart build and justify their changes and alterations, or to make all our predictions right or wrong, but for now it just remains a hypothetical albeit interesting idea.

#critical role #cr3 #daggerheart #bells hells #matt mercer #ashley johnson #taliesin jaffe #laura bailey #travis willingham #sam riegel #liam o'brien #marisha ray #robbie daymond #ashton greymoore #fearne calloway #imogen temult #laudna #orym of the air ashari #dorian storm #braius doomseed #chetney pock o'pea #cr live show speculation #cr speculation #had to release a bunch of new stuff in the void to make me rewrite all of this XD #but yeah this probably has been said elsewhere but I had it drafted since early June so I might as well post it #I could probably guess all the Experiences that'll be chosen like 'Fun Scary' 'Punk' 'Exaltant' 'Saviour Blade of the Tempest' and whatnot #I do hope they don't nix all of Ashton's abilities and chalk it up to the new brain because I did like all the Dunamancy stuff #not to mention that technically Imogen has a lost god within her; and Fearne can summon a dragon #was tempted to put Ashton as a Reborne but they don't really want anything to do with Hishari; Slyborne fits them better #FCG would've been Reborne though; Clank Divine Wielder Seraph most likely too

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lllunaverde · 2 days ago

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𝐖𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐬

CW: 0.8k w. angst with comfort. mentions of suicide. first pov. please always read my general rules first.

©lllunaverde, december 2024

"Hey." The softest of word one could merely utter gently to me and I'd be on my knees. A tug at my heart. I always believed that word is so gentle, well, mostly because I think it's a call for attention, but out of benignity. To pull you out of whatever you may be in but tenderly.

Whenever he says it, I melt. The word alone and from the man I let wield the power over me. I'm nothing. A breath of fresh air to me the second I feel I'm not of this world. That I live when I don't exist for a moment as I'm in his hold.

Such a word.

And the second he utters it twice, finally takes me back to present. The heaviness of his presence surrounds me. I wish it could always blanket me. Forever wash away what bites my being. Yet all is fleeting.

All the more reason for me to feel the shudder that crawls through my skin as his breath blows behind me, with his hands holding me close. To cherish the comfort of his concern through knowing silence before all is said.

"Speak to me." He says. Any other time, I would have been in his grasp to easily command, but of course--this is different. Still and always, with his hold on me, is what grounds me. "Please."

How could I have ever been so lucky?

How did it come to this anyways.

Suppose I have been too far in my head that I hadn't seen him seeing me, even as I stitch myself presentably, he can see all the threads behind in such a tangled and unfathomable mess.

I'm afraid there's nothing I could hide from him even if I want to.

And if there's anything I know truly, is that such blessings we could see surround us, must be honoured.

As his warmth surrounds me more, closing the distance behind us, coldness running over my body for a second from the sensation of being engulfed by his warmth. His arm squeezing me tightly against his chest as he feels it.

His face nestled in my neck, I welcome myself in his embrace, basking in the nothingness for what time could let me have, for as long as he let me.

And as I got myself out again, "Hey." He whispered, and I almost smiled and laughed.

I twined my hand on his where it lays on my stomach as I nuzzle my head against his chest. "Hi." Barely a whisper.

He squeezed my hand, holding me even more on him. "Hi." His hot breath almost could sedate me.

I don't speak after that but just remained loose in his grasp.

He keeps me together.

"Can I carry you to bed?" He asked. I wouldn't even have to answer.

There he kneels before me as I sit on the edge of his bed.

God, he has my heart.

"Forgive me..." I merely spoke, not meeting his eyes. Would it be bad if I hope he'd be angry? "Don't be mad." What a lie.

I'm not ready to see the hurt in his eyes. "I..I've been...thinking of killing myself lately a lot."

His hands holding mine turns tighter, I feel his gaze on me not breaking, nor even falter. "Will you look at me?"

It only takes once for me to listen to his.....plea.

It's not long to see the pain underneath him. How cruel do I have to be to feel solace in them.

Too much a human I have become.

It's only inevitable for him to blame himself but he figures maybe that would be selfish if he thought of himself first before you when it is you who has been hurting all along.

So he does what he think is best--to be there with you. As he always has been.

He doesn't speak, instead graced you with his lips on your knuckles, making each tender kiss last, never letting his eyes stray as he does.

There's something so to behold in the comfort we can offer with silence, taking a part of what breaks us, almost giving us a clean slate.

And I want to kill myself. I do. But I want to hear my brother's laugh more. I want to see my nephew and niece grow up. I want to see my friends more.

And I want to feel him more everyday. To hear my heart bang so loud in my chest as he slowly kiss all of my fingertips, each kiss so soft yet unyielding.

We're only human after all.

"Let me bathe you." He spoke after kissing your knuckles once again.

And there you were in the bathroom as he strips you off just after he drew you a bath.

There you were both under the water, laying against his chest as he's sitting back on the bathhub.

What more could I ask for as he hold my hands, flowing our fingers gently above the water, his face resting softly upon mine, with his heart beating against me, reminding me of my own.

A blessing of the many from being a human in this land.

"Will you let me?" He asks as he slowly free your hands to run them up slowly your arms. And you let out only the faintest of 'yes'.

I want to kill myself.

But I want to feel this more as he gives himself to me as I for him, each time.

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tehrevving · 2 days ago

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Vincent Buys Condoms: A Chaos Theory Interlude

Was gonna post this later but ya'll can have a treat for the 4th of July even though I don't celebrate lol.

Some of you might remember that I filled a request for Vincent buying condoms ages ago. I had a lot of fun with it but it was my first time writing from his pov and not my best work lol. I always intended to eventually improve it and make it more of a standalone part of Chaos Theory once I was more comfortable writing his pov. So now that I'm seriously considering the sequel, here it is!

I would highly recommend you give this a go even if you've read the original, cause I've made a lot of changes. This one is much more explicit 😉

This is set after chapter 17 of Chaos Theory and contains spoilers and mature sexual content. Enjoy!

Read on Ao3

It is frustratingly late by the time Cid finally relents, giving up bickering over the route to the northern continent. The man's insistence on having the last word, coupled with his general arrogance had meant the entire discussion became an endeavour in patience that Vincent hadn't wanted to deal with. Eventually he had just walked out, jumping from of the cockpit while Cid continued to bark at the back of his head. Vincent doesn't care, he has things to do, well, he has one thing he needs to do before departure that he's absolutely dreading.

He can't stop thinking about last night, the disjointed erotic scenes of it replaying over and over in his mind since the radio turned to static this morning. Everything had moved so fast and the press of your teeth to his throat had prevented him from being able to think straight. He hadn't planned on taking his clothes off, but he hadn't been able to say no to your begging, kiss swollen lips. Your hands had felt otherworldly, warm, comforting and sinful against his bare flesh, and he'd wanted more. He had wanted to give you everything, even as his monsters simmered in wait underneath his skin. He had been handling it, everything had been fine, but then you'd soaked his chest and turned him into a beast.

He still doesn't understand why that happened, how it happened. He doesn't know why you react so strongly to his physical presence. It doesn't make sense. Never in his new life has he ever been given any indication that his touch elicits a supernatural reaction, although you are the only one he has held with his own free will. His body is disgusting, not fit to give or receive pleasure, but you'd taken it from him anyway, screaming and begging for something he never could have envisioned.

A shudder, hot and tingling drips down his spine from the memory, from the echo of your voice in his head. You had been delirious with pleasure and want, confused and uncertain but trusting him, crying out for him and no one else. You had been incoherent, mindless, but only his name had slipped broken from your lips. His body grows warm as the harsh beat of the coastal sun threatens to undo him.

He had almost lost control, in some ways he had, and it's just not good enough. He had been far too close to giving in. Somehow, spurred on by your cries he'd ended up with the head of his cock rubbing at the bare, scorching heat of your folds. You had been so wet, dripping while your body tried recklessly to pull him inside. You had begged for him, verbally, desperately, your wants impossibly clear. He had only been able to resist because of the lingering discomfort from how you had used his chest. Next time he knows he won't be able to.

You make him lose control, slicing a million shallow cuts to the fraying ropes that keep his control in check. He should hate what you do to him, he wants to hate it, instead he just craves it. He wants to give in, wants you to keep slicing. He needs for you to cut the noose taught around his neck and drag soft fingers through the secrets hidden among the viscera of his empty chest.

He inhales the hot air, overheated, struggling to clear his head as he reaches his destination. He doesn't have any idea how to handle your eagerness, but he needs to be prepared. He remembers the flippant way you had previously mentioned having a materia, but a single mention is not enough. He refuses to make assumptions or take unnecessary risk. He trusts you, somehow, but he has been tricked before. He blinks suddenly to clear his head, it is a disservice to compare you to her, he understands that, no matter how difficult it may be, so he is not going to. You are sweet and bold, reckless, so he must be the one with a clear head.

He stares at the shop sign with distaste and sighs, gathering his composure. He needs to do this, it's non negotiable. He allows some of the intrusive thoughts inside, just for a moment, trying to use their hiss of doubt to steel his discomfort. He needs to do this because he does not deserve to feel the bare pleasure and warmth of another so intimately. He needs this because he will almost certainly be a disappointment, losing himself the moment he slips inside, at least with a barrier he might stand half a chance.

The automatic doors shudder, blasting Vincent with a wave of refreshingly cool air. He steps inside, cloak swishing in the breeze, cringing internally as something beeps loudly, announcing his presence. He takes in the store and the wide eyed stare of the woman behind the counter. He tries to relax his shoulders and adjust his body language, he doesn't want to be perceived as a threat.

“E-excuse me Sir,” she stammers, managing to find her voice half way through, transitioning smoothly into a clearly practised spiel. “Can I help you with anything?”

“No,” Vincent replies dismissively, walking straight past her. He dislikes being rude, but he will not see her again and does not have the time or patience to make small talk, or discuss intimate matters with a stranger.

The pharmacy is larger than he expected, rows of aisles labelled haphazardly with the ridiculous standard font of this era. The typeface is looping, slanted oddly and frustrating to understand at a glance. He squints at the words, eventually finding what he's looking for, a single, nondescript aisle labelled 'family planning.' His brow furrows with the disgust he feels for the term.

There is so much more choice than he had expected and his eyes glaze over an overwhelmingly large assortment of boxes and unfamiliar brands. He sighs, he'd hoped this would be straight forward. He remembers what he used to use, in a past life far too long ago, but of course that appears to no longer exist. He allows a brief moment of silence for the last box he purchased, still sitting in a drawer at the Shinra manor, unopened and likely more than 20 years out of date.

He scans the aisle, surprised and concerned at the assortment, endless bright packaging catching his eye. He tilts his head at a box labelled, flavoured, and wonders for a brief moment if you might prefer for him to taste like—his lip curls with distaste—banana or strawberry. Definitely not.

He searches the next row, finding a plain box that looks promising until he notices the fine print, extra lubricated. He can't help a small smirk from forming underneath his cowl. While he may end up choosing those, that benefit will certainly not be required. It is a relief to only need to be concerned about the opposite problem, and it is not a problem because he is more than happy to use his tongue to remove any excess if you end up too slippery. He forces his attention back to the aisle. He needs to focus. There isn't enough time for him to be distracted by thoughts of your taste. He pictures your legs squeezing his shoulders, frantic hands pulling at his hair while salty-sweetness coats his lips and drips from his wrist. He stills himself, continuing that train of thought is far too dangerous.

There are multiple boxes advertising patterns, bright text boasting that they are, ribbed for her pleasure. His brow furrows, he is unfamiliar with those. Would that actually be pleasurable for a woman? He’s not sure. He does not think he would like texture inside of himself, but you had seemed to enjoy his glove last night. Maybe there is some merit. He considers the purchase for a moment but then comes to his senses. He is perfectly capable of pleasing you without any external aid, and does not ever intend to imply otherwise.

The next shelf is full of larger boxes with much more discrete packaging. The text is small, advertising insertable, vibrating objects and textured rings. He is curious but the packaging is non descriptive. Are the rings for him to wear? He's not sure what purpose that might serve or what benefit it might bestow. It is strange that all of this debauchery is out in the open, visible at a normal pharmacy. He expected for there to be the barest of selection, but instead this aisle could easily compare to a speciality store. He wonders if the world is just like this now, or if it is just because he is in a resort town.

Vincent keeps looking, eyes glazing past words like, ‘tingling,’ ‘long lasting’, and ‘minty.’ It is good that there is choice, but this is so much more difficult than it used to be. He sighs, modern people truly are degenerates. Finally, right at the bottom, where he has to bend at the knees to inspect them, he finally finds the regular ones. He selects a smaller sized box advertising a reasonable amount of lubrication and a larger than average length. That will do. This has all already wasted too much time.

He walks to the counter, purpose in his step. He just wants to get out of here. He pauses for a moment at the end of one of the aisle, an assortment of breath mints catching his attention. Cid had been making a not so subtle dig at his hygiene this morning when he had offered gum, but now Vincent considers that the man may have had a point. While he doesn't really need to brush his teeth, if he is going to be kissing regularly, he may need to make some changes. He observes the packaging, trying to match the colours with what he had seen Cid pull from his pocket, that single piece this morning had been far more enjoyable than he'd expected.

Vincent picks up the closest match he finds and heads to the counter. The same woman that had stared earlier gives him an extremely funny look as she rings up his purchase. He forgives her, he probably does look ridiculous, an inhuman monster purchasing condoms. Her eyes narrow when he pays with cash instead of the strange plastic cards that everyone now seems to use. She struggles to count the change for him, not able to do the arithmetic or recognise the coins. Vincent sighs, the world truly has gotten worse in his absence.

He walks back to the Bronco, squinting in the sunlight while his new purchases weigh heavy in the pocket just behind his gun holster. The light is harsher now and he can feel it burning the pale skin of his face. He disappears as much as he can into his cowl, still uncomfortable being outside.

Vincent spots Barret as he turns the corner to the dock and sighs when the large man beckons him over. He's tempted to just keep walking but he can sense the malice in the man's gaze, hidden behind dark sunglasses.

“If you hurt her,” Barret grunts, gesturing towards the plane with his head. “I’ll shoot you.”

The man is clearly extremely serious.

“Noted,” Vincent replies.

He appreciates Barret’s protectiveness even if it makes him want to lash out. The mere insinuation that he might hurt you incites his monsters to fury, even when he knows they cannot be trusted. He will always put your needs and wants above his own, no matter how much of a struggle it may be for him.

Barret dismisses him with a wave of his gun arm and Vincent quickly walks away, thankful the conversation had not been excessively painful.

He heads down to the dock, spying you immediately, standing underneath one of the plane's broken wings and speaking animatedly with Aerith. You are even prettier today than yesterday, eyes bright and clear. Vincent can see the pleasure he gave you last night in the relaxed set to your shoulders, and the slight twitch of your thighs as you shift your weight. He's filled with a selfish pride, knowing how much he affected you but it's quickly replaced with regret. He had wanted to stay to keep you company in the morning. It is almost unforgivable to leave someone you care about to wake up alone after such an intense night.

Your face visibly lights up when you catch sight of him, waving as you walk closer. You stop just in front of him, looking up with those sweet eyes and a soft smile. He wants to pull you into his arms and hear the cute squeak he knows you would let out, but stops himself. His shoulders relax, lingering tension and frustration over the morning leaving now that he's close to you. All he needs to do now is wait until the plane is ready to depart, and brooding in wait is one of his favourite past times, was one of his favourite past times. He's gotten much less out of it recently, ever since his thoughts became filled with endless curiosity over how loudly he might be able to make you cry his name.

“Can you help Aerith and I reach something?” you ask, voice sweet and hopeful before trailing off. “We’re both too short,” you pout.

He nods, hiding a small smile behind his cowl, though he's sure you see through his hidden expression. The apprehensive way that you ask him for things is cute, like you expect him to say no. He would never deny you anything.

“Thanks,” you smile, turning with a wave of your hand, asking him to follow. He falls into step behind you, immediately distracted by the sway of your hips and the curve of your ass. He tries not to stare but quickly gives in. He finds frustration with this part of himself, how his attraction starts from nothing but then becomes overwhelming and difficult to resist. He wonders idly if you even realise how much you affect him.

He doesn't know how he's going to get you alone tonight, or manage to spend long enough with you for it to be meaningful. He does not want to have to disappear before the morning again, you deserve so much more than a cold bed. He sighs, stepping closer to the plane, wondering what sort of commotion he will need to stage later in order to get you alone.

#vincent valentine #vincent valentine x reader #chaos theory #ffvii #rev writes #my writing

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wardenparker · 6 hours ago

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The Secret of My Success, ch 3

Harry Castillo x plus size reader Co-written with @absurdthirst

When not even a professional matchmaking firm can help Harry Castillo find love, he turns his attention to helping his best friend meet their soulmate instead. The surprise of finding his own in the process will challenge the attitude Harry has taken toward dating for his entire life, and open up a whole new world of romance.

(This story picks up where the last chapter of The Unbearable Weight of Perfection leaves off, and will weave in a few other soulmate characters from previous stories just for fun. Don't worry if you haven't read those stories though! I'll be dropping the pertinent references in each chapter's note section to read along with Harry and his soulmate's adventures.)

Rating: M for Mature but this blog is always 18+ Word Count: 11k Warnings: *Reader is nicknamed Mack* (Continuous warnings for: food/alcohol consumption, tobacco smoking.) Fluff, sexual tension, flirting. Summary: The morning after your first date with Harry, you're floating on Cloud 9. And it doesn't look like that's going to be changing any time soon. Notes: This week we've got another Alewife reference and a mention of Dave York's soulmate from Killer Writing!

Sunday morning comes with languid stretching and a hot shower, with your daily skincare routine and fresh clothes. It comes with the satisfaction of knowing you managed to clean up the mess that your client made last night, but the giddy ache of wondering what last night could have been.

You wander out into the kitchen to make a habitually large cup of coffee, not realizing you're grinning like an idiot. That your entire face and perky body language gives you away. Probably, you would have gone on with your whole day like that if Percy and Tamara hadn't been sitting at the kitchen table smirking at you.

"Well, she did come back to the apartment last night." Tamara snorts as she looks towards Percy. "So I don't think that she got lucky?"

Percy shakes his head. "I've never known Harry to send someone home after." He admits. "If he did that last night, we are going to have to have a talk."

“I wasn’t sent.” Even performatively rolling your eyes feels fake today, considering you’re grinning into your coffee as you sit down at the table. “I had a work emergency while we were still at the restaurant. We got interrupted.”

"Soooooo." Tamara's grin is wide, almost triumphant, as if she had been betting on a positive outcome. "It was a good date? It sounds like you hated having a work emergency and I know how much you love to work." She teases, most of the time when she is talking to Percy when he's home, you are still working late into the night.

“I do love my work. I just hate it when my client gets cold feet and panics all over my careful planning.” Still, that stupid grin is plastered on your face when you sit looking between your best friend and his soulmate. “Would you guys…mind terribly if Harry was my plus one for dinner tonight? I know I said I didn’t have one, but I’ll call the restaurant myself and fix the reservation.”

They exchange grins, long and slightly smug before Percy chuckles. "You owe me." He teases, winking at you. "But sure my other best friend can come to a dinner he had begged off of just a couple of days ago."

“He did?” You ask, obviously shocked.

Percy chuckles. "Yes, he did." He shrugs. "Said he would rather work but I guess something has changed."

“Oh.” But that only makes your smile grow, threatening to overtake your face now. “Well that’s…that’s an interesting development.”

“It is.” Tamara snorts. “Harry Castillo is a workaholic.”

“And no one at this table would know anything about that,” you snort, knowing full well that all three of you also fit the description.

“Not at all.” She hums. Percy snorts and reaches for her hand to press a kiss to the back of it. “Says the woman who is fitting house hunting into costume fittings and an interview.”

“Speaking of breaks.” Eyeing them down over your coffee is definitely not making you smile any less, but at least it focuses you. “Now that you have a wedding date, we can start booking your honeymoon. Have you picked a location yet?”

“We’ve been talking about that.” Percy tilts his head. “We are actually talking about the Maldives.”

“And we’re still talking about an all-inclusive?” When they agree, you take out your phone and start to open a new note to jot things down, but it glows with a new text message instead. “DoorDash?” You frown at the screen. “I didn’t order DoorDash, why am I getting a text about a delivery?”

“Maybe you accidentally ordered something while you’ve been floating above the clouds.” Tamara jokes.

“I haven’t opened DoorDash since you got back into town on Wednesday.” You’re still frowning at your phone, and even more so when the buzzer in your kitchen goes off and the Dasher announces themself.

“Hi—uh, I think there’s been a mistake.” You say when you answer it. “I didn’t place a delivery order.”

“It’s for somebody named Mack?” The woman in the lobby says into the speaker. “The order was placed by somebody named Harry for somebody named Mack.”

“Harry?” Percy looks confused for a moment before he breaks out into a wide grin. “Mystery solved.” He snorts.

There is no elevator in your Washington Heights apartment building, but you shuffle downstairs in your fresh clothes and slippers only to reappear in your apartment five minutes later with a delivery bag.

“What is it?” Percy asks, almost bursting with curiosity. “I bet you he sent you breakfast from that bagel shop he loves.”

"Let's...see..." The nondescript bag opens up to release the most intoxicating, unctuous sweet-spice smell that is as familiar to you as home. "Oh my god..." you gasp a little when you pull out the container with an unfamiliar restaurant logo on it and pop open the top.

Bananas foster pancakes. He actually hunted around the city and found you bananas foster for breakfast. You're practically gawking at the container when you take it out, but your phone is still in your other hand and the buzz snaps your attention away for a moment.

Harry had been watching the delivery progress on his phone. Sipping his coffee as he monitored it like he was some government watchdog group. Smirking to himself when the meal is marked delivered, he opens his messages and composes a text.

‘Since we didn’t get to share dessert last night or breakfast morning, this will have to do for now. XOXO Harry’

"Oh my god." It's a little stronger now. A little more pronounced. And the stupid grin that's been plastered on your face all morning turns dreamy as you sink down into a chair. "He...we had ordered dessert before I got called away last night...and we were talking about maybe spending the night and..." And this is by far the most fucking romantic thing a man has done for you ever.

'This is the best surprise in the world, you can't imagine how much I'm smiling right now. See you tonight – 7pm, Peking Duck House in Chinatown. XOXO'

‘Enjoy every bite. I’ll see you tonight, beautiful.’

Harry smiles to himself as he sets his phone down, hoping that you enjoy his little gift. He might have to have you compare it to your Alehouse treat you had talked up so much last night.

"I have a bone to pick with you, Perce." There is a plastic fork in the bag, so you sit down at the table with your delivery and set your phone down decisively. "How long have you been friends with this man and I'm only just meeting him?"

“Uhhhhh.” His shrug is a little half hearted and he gestures around. “You just got here.” He reminds you. “And you work a lot.”

"Well, you've been hiding him and he's perfect," you huff. "This is literally the nicest thing a guy has done for me ever."

Harry’s normally a flowers or pick up the check kind of man. Percy smirks as he realizes the thought that went into the gesture. “I think that it might be you, Mack.” He admits.

"Doubtful," you snort, rolling your eyes.

“Fucking hand to God.” He holds one hand over his heart and the other like he’s being sworn in to testify in court. “The man does flowers, not DoorDash.”

"Flowers are beautiful." And these pancakes are incredible. You groan happily and do a wiggly little dance in your chair over how good they are after the first bite. "Well...whatever it is, I'm not mad about it. He's gorgeous and sweet and funny. Like to the point where I'm willing to forgive him for being a Yankees fan."

Tamara snorts, shaking her head. “You two are fucking adorable together.” She admits. “He’s handsome and fucking loaded.” Her wink is pure teasing. “And it seems like he’s got a finger on your pulse.”

"Bet he could have his finger on something else pretty soon." Percy snorts, shoving back from the table. When you shoot him a pointed glare and huff dramatically, he flips you the bird in that playful way only lifelong best friends or siblings can really manage. "I'm not wrong!" He insists, disappearing into the kitchen and reemerging seconds later with the coffee pot to top off everyone's mugs.

“Thank you love.” Tamara bats her eyes at Percy playfully. “And whenever Harry puts fingers on Mack, it’s none of our business.” She informs him primly. “Probably tonight.”

The best you can do with a mouthful of pancakes is huff and roll your eyes, but when you’re done chewing you point your fork at both of them. “Since you’re not flying out until the morning, I’ll go to his place,” you joke.

Surely it’s just joking.

“So what’s the plan for today besides moon over your pancakes?” Tamara asks seriously with a smirk.

“I’ve got a bunch of roommate interviews at the coffeeshop on the corner this afternoon.” A half dozen in total, although you have your doubts about this batch. You’re just looking for someone to fill the gap after Percy moves out. They don’t have to be perfect.

Percy huffs, clearly not thrilled with this plan. “I’ve already said I would continue to pay for half the rent.” He reminds you.

“Perce.” Your fork comes up again, plastic tines pointed right at him. “I love you. You’re the brother I never had. But you don’t need to pay for a place you aren’t living anymore while you’re out there trying to buy a house with your soulmate. It’s okay.”

“At least let me pay if you don’t find anything but weirdos or creeps.” He barters, feeling horrible about the timing of this.

“If I’m still stuck in two weeks when next month’s rent is due, we’ll talk,” you promise him, though you know how that talk will go. Percy should be focusing on his happiness right now, and you don’t want to burden that at all.

He’s not happy with that and he shows it by sticking his tongue out at you like you are both twelve again.

Tamara’s face stays completely neutral even though she’s smirking on the inside. “I have never been so attracted to you before,” she deadpans, before pecking Percy on the cheek and getting up from the table.

“I should just pay the landlord.” He threatens mildly, reaching over and swiping a banana that had fallen to the side. “Then you can’t do anything but bitch.”

“Aren’t you the one who told me two months ago that when this lease ran out, I should look for something in a different neighborhood?” You pose, knowing he had. Washington Heights has been nice but this is the place he got after college almost a decade ago. “Maybe I’ll find somebody who really really loves this place and I’ll go somewhere else in six months’ time. There’s no way to know what’s going to happen, Perce.”

“Just-“ Percy worries about you. Feels so damn guilty he convinced you to come to New York and now he’s abandoning you. “Be careful about the neighborhoods, okay?” He asks seriously, his eyes filled with all the concern he doesn’t voice.

“Perce.” He worries. You know he does. You worried when he moved here too. But you’re both older and tougher than you were then. “I’m the daughter of a colonel and an Army nurse whose idea of retiring was joining the local fire department. You are the one who gave me my nickname, remember? You know I can handle myself.”

“I know….” He does know that. Realistically. Emotionally…you’re his slightly younger sister that he needs to protect from the bullies of the world. Even though sometimes you protected him.

Forking up another bite of pancakes, you shoot him a reassuring smile. “I’ll figure it out,” you promise him. “I always do.”

He knows that you can, but he also knows Harry has a pretty good beat on real estate in the city. He’ll ask him if he knows of any good buildings that have vacancies. “Sure thing.”

******

Right at seven, Harry is opening the door to the Peking Duck House. Dressed a little more informally since this is supposed to be a family dinner, but he still has a jacket on. Only to realize he doesn’t know who made the reservation.

"One for dinner, sir?" The smiling hostess at the front desk is carefully made up and styled, making the most of the simple black clothes that are a ubiquitous uniform of the restaurant industry.

“No, I’m meeting someone. People.” He clarifies, craning his neck to look over the tall dividers to find Percy’s big head sticking up. Or better yet, to find you.

“Could be under Stokes. Or Wilson.” He huffs, remembering that Wilson is Tamara’s surname. “Or…”

"Hi, handsome." You heard his voice from the other side of the screen, appearing around the side of the wooden divider in a short blue party dress and black tights that blend right into your black heels to make your legs look longer.

“Hey.” He grins and twists around to look at the hostess. “Her. I’m with her.” He promises, not bothering to wait before he’s walking to your side. “I’m not late, am I?” He asks. “You said seven.”

"You're not late," you promise him, instinctively holding out your hand to him. "I got here about a minute ago. Right after the lovebirds." Percy and Tamara are already sitting at a table with Tam's parents and her sister. A few more people are due to arrive, but the party will be less than ten when all is said and done. "How was your day?"

“Productive.” He admits, lifting a brow at you before he comes in to buss a kiss on your cheek. “You look beautiful.” He compliments. “How was your day?”

“Tiring,” you admit, though you look very obviously pleased at the compliment. “Amazing breakfast surprise notwithstanding, of course.”

“How does that compare to your Alewife?” He asks curiously as you turn to guide him back towards the table.

"Almost as good." When he looks half-stricken you laugh. "It was amazing. Honestly. But I'm sure you have a food or a place or something that nostalgia has made all glossy and rosy in your mind."

He gives you a look that says he doesn’t really know what you’re talking about, but he supports you right as the two of you reach the table. “Harry.” Percy is full of meddling mischief as he stands up to greet his friend. “What made you decide to come?” He asks, smirking at Harry like he’s discovered some wild secret.

“I was invited.” Harry snorts, shaking his hand and then leaning down to kiss Tamara’s cheek.

"Twice, wasn't it?" She grins at him.

"Definitely twice." Percy smirks. "Said no the first time, didn't you?"

“I was busy.” He sniffs but no one at the table is buying it as he sits down. “Now I’m not.”

"Well now you can come be not busy with some excellent food." Renee smiles at him and leans against her movie star sister at the table. "I'm so glad we went shopping for bridesmaids’ dresses before dinner."

“Have you found what you wanted?” He asks, not really interested but it is polite conversation. He had learned about that when Charlotte was planning her and Peter’s wedding. She had been quite upset when he didn’t seem to care about the details like she thought he was supposed to as the best man.

"We picked out the shade of blue and the fabric that we liked best." Tamara beams with excitement. "And both of my bridesmaids found dresses that they like, so I count the day as a stunning success." The trip had been a little anxiety inducing for everyone involved since you and Renee have exceedingly different body types and styles, but it had worked out. The advantage of keeping the wedding party small was that decisions could be made easily and quickly when the mood struck.

“That’s good.” He nods, accepting the menu when you hand it to him and opens it without looking down. “I’m sure that everything will be gorgeous.”

"Harry." Percy hums in amusement. "Don't you want to know who the rest of the wedding party is going to be?"

He frowns slightly as he glances over at his friend. “Sure.” He doesn’t really care, but he’s assumed he’s going to be in it. Or he might not. Who knows?

"Best man and maid of honor will be our siblings." Percy picks up Tamara's hand at the table and presses a kiss to her palm, right by the band of her engagement ring. "My brother and her sister, I mean. Then Tam's other bridesmaid is going to be Mack," he smirks at Harry. "And I thought I'd ask you to be my groomsman."

Harry blinks and looks at you, then Renee, Tamara and Percy. “Sounds like I have to make sure my tux still fits.” He chuckles. “Of course I will.”

“It’s just a little wedding party.” Tamara is glowing about it though, holding her little sister’s hand and Percy’s as she sits at the table. “One of my best friends is ordained to do weddings and he’ll be in New York with his family starting next week. Everything is lining up so perfectly.”

“Sixty-one days to go.” Harry hums as he smirks. “It’s good that the pieces are clicking into place.”

“Extremely good.” Percy agrees without hesitation. “I just hope house hunting goes this smoothly.”

“Do you have a real estate agent out there?” Harry asks, the question aimed towards Tamara.

“I do, yeah.” She nods. “My friends and I have all sort of used one office over the years. They’re discreet and excellent with finding secure properties.” Between her own career and Percy becoming the new head of the Castillo Holdings LA office, discretion and security matter.

“Good.” Percy nods so that makes Harry relax. “I know that you will find the perfect place to set up your honeymoon nest.”

“That’s one half of your real estate concerns taken care of,” Tamara’s mother agrees. Bernadette Wilson has her hands folded on the table and maternal concern painted on her face.

“What’s the other half?” Harry lifts his brows, curious as to what could possibly be more important than finding their first home together. That always seemed to be a priority for everyone.

“Oh, it’s nothing,” you insist. “I’m looking for a new roommate and Percy’s acting like a mother hen.”

“You’re giving up the apartment?” Percy had told him that he planned on keeping the apartment for when they had to travel back to New York. Those plans had obviously change.

“We talked about it…” Percy admits sheepishly.

“The three of us,” you note so it doesn’t sound like Percy and Tamara ditched you.

Percy nods. “The three of us talked about it. And we’re going to buy an apartment or a condo here instead. Something that will be big enough for our family when we have one.” The little walkup in the Heights was definitely not big enough for more than two people. And even then it was barely big enough for that.

Harry nods, aware that is a smart move. “But not now, right?” He asks, connecting the dots.

“Well…the lease technically ends at the end of the month,” Percy admits.

“The three of us,” you note so it doesn’t sound like Percy and Tamara ditched you.

Harry nods, aware that is a smart move. “But not now, right?” He asks, connecting the dots.

“Well…the lease technically ends at the end of the month,” Percy admits.

“I’ll take it over.” What no one at this table wants to say is that you’re probably the least wealthy person at the table barring Tamara’s sister who is in graduate school. No one wants to make you uncomfortable, but you don’t mind staying the facts. “I just can’t afford it without a roommate.”

“That apartment is overpriced.” Harry isn’t just saying that, he’s told Percy that for years. The third floor walk-up wasn’t even rent controlled. Nor did it have air like a lot of the pre-war buildings. The owner didn’t care about updating it. “Let me give you the name of a broker.” He offers. “In case your roommate idea doesn’t work out.”

“That’s very nice of you.” Impractical, because you likely won’t be able to afford a billionaire’s broker or the properties they would show you, but the gesture is what counts here.

He can tell that it’s a brush off, that you are just being polite, so he nods. “Okay.” He tells you, just deciding that he will give your number to his broker and let it go from there.

Conversation moves on. It’s a delicious and elaborate dinner with more dishes than all of you could possibly finish and plenty of wine. Harry’s hand lands on the back of your chair at one point. Then on your thigh. Your hand met his thigh in turn. The burn of warmth and wanting seems to just go on and on, until you’re pretty sure you’ve unconsciously scooted your chairs closer together at the table during the meal.

Percy sees it, if the shit-eating, ‘I told you so’ grin is any indication. Harry ignores it. Even if his own lips twitches slightly. He knows he will get a ration of shit but he doesn’t care.

It takes three rounds of goodbyes in the end, because Tamara’s family is so lovely and have been such a joy to meet, but eventually you end up walking out onto the sidewalk in front of the restaurant into the summer night with side by side with Harry.

“How is your bride feeling?” Harry asks, smirking slightly as he admires the way you carry yourself. The dress is very flattering on you and he honestly finds himself wondering what kind of lingerie you are wearing up under it.

“Much better, thankfully. I ended up at the hotel for an hour straightening things out and then straightening her out for another hour.” You offer him a lopsided smile, admiring him just as much as he is admiring you. The way he’s done his hair tonight, a little curl has come loose in front and just one lock of hair should not make you feel so feral. “Everyone has dreams. And for people who dream about their wedding, I think they view it as more attainable in some ways. But big dreams can mean big disappointments if something goes awry and people have trouble managing that. That’s…well, that’s why I have the job that I do. Because somebody can be there to help them.”

“I honestly don’t understand it.” Harry admits before he lifts his hands innocently. “I’m not insulting it.” He promises, not wanting you to feel like he’s demeaning your career. “I’ve just always learned that there are risks and sometimes the deals don’t turn out like you want.”

“But you’re in finance,” you remind him gently. “Your parents are in finance. Your brother is, too. The mentality is different for people who aren’t exposed to business right from the early stages of life. Of course some people are more easygoing or more understanding than others, but on the whole…people who are inclined to hire a wedding planner are often people who want something grand or people who need help with the business end of things.”

“If you didn’t do it for a living, would you plan your own?” He knows you want to get married. You’ve admitted that you dreamed about it for a long time.

“I don’t know.” You admit, chewing on the question for a long moment. “I think I might be the kind of person to hire a wedding planner. If my fiancé was okay with it.”

You prioritize. You understand that maintaining a career and trying to balance a large scale event would wear you down. But you are in the industry. “I see.” He nods. “That’s smart.” He chuckles. “That’s why Percy and Tamara wanted you to plan their wedding.”

“I hope I do them justice.” That’s what you hope with every client you have. Every couple who chooses you to plan their wedding gets a little piece of your heart for the time you’re a part of their story. “All I want is for them to be happy.”

“You heard them.” Harry snorts. “They could get married anywhere and be on top of the world.” He envies that, he envies the love that just seems to completely consumes them.

"They're lucky." For all the dreams you've ever had, the realistic part of you knows how rare that is. There are even plenty of soulmate pairs in the world that aren't as blissful in love as Percy and Tamara are.

“They are.” He agrees. “Did you bring your car?” He asks, looking around for the closest parking garage.

You shake your head and motion down the street in the direction that you walked from. "I took the subway tonight."

“So you’re telling me that you need a ride?” He smirks slightly and pulls out his phone to call his driver.

“I could easily take the subway home again,” you remind him, grinning all the while. “But if you’re offering, I won’t say no.”

“Where do you want to go?” He asks, sending a message and then glancing down at your heels. “Not far, I’m assuming.”

“I thought I was just going home,” you hum. You’re teasing him, but it seems to you that Harry likes to be teased. “I didn’t know I had options.”

“You seem like the type to explore the city after dinner.” He judges with a half crooked grin. “Somewhere historic, perhaps slightly romantic.”

This time you hum for real, a wistful smile overtaking your face. “Got any place in mind?”

“Have you been to Bow Bridge in all your running as a wedding planner?” He asks.

“I know what it is.” There’s no use in reminding him that you haven’t been in New York very long. He knows. He just wants to show you something and you want to let him. “But I’ve never been.”

“Then what do you think about a walk?” He asks, watching the car pull up. “After a drive, of course.”

"Sounds perfect." The last thing you want to do right now is end the night, and nearly anything he could suggest would sound good. A walk in Central Park? That is the New York City rom com moment you crave.

He smiles, reaching forward and opening the back seat of the car and motioning for you to get inside. “Then let’s go walk.”

The butter-soft leather seats of his car are so easy to slide across that it feels like air, and he gets in beside you at the curb. There is a five second pause before the car takes off into traffic again, and even that motion is as smooth as the seats.

“So where have you been in our city?” He asks, twisting in his seat and giving you a small smirk. It’s playful and teasing, his eyes expectant as he waits for your answer.

"The Natural History Museum. The Guggenheim. The Whitney." Naming off the places you've gone in your spare time is easy, but you haven't had that much spare time. Monday through Friday you're in the office while things are open, and on the weekends you do as much as you can between attending client weddings. "I got my library card and spent my first Sunday in the city wandering around the library aimlessly."

“I think the last time I went to the library was in college.” Harry admits, almost shocked that it’s been this long.

"No!" One hand goes to your chest, clutching your proverbial pearls. "That library has everything! It's incredible. Percy had to hunt me down and haul me out of there."

Harry chuckles and gives an almost embarrassed shrug. “If I need a book, I go buy it.” He admits. Most often his reading material is reports, so there’s no tangible need to visit the library.

"I'm guessing...you're not a big novel guy?"

“I don’t have much time to leisure read.” Harry frowns slightly, wondering if that’s wrong. “Do you?” He asks. “Read novels?”

"All the time." It's not too surprising that he doesn't, you reflect, but you wonder if he wishes he had more time for it. Running an entire company does take up a lot of time. "The classics, obviously. Jane Austen, Agatha Christie, Margaret Atwood. New stuff, too. Romantasy is so easy to fall down a rabbit hole into, but I love mysteries too. Have you ever read any of S.H. York's books?"

The name doesn’t ring a bell and it’s probably obvious on his face from the way that you snigger at him. Lips twisted in a disbelieving smile as you shake your head. “Can’t say that I have.”

"She's a mystery writer. She's got this series about a woman who works in a lab and falls in love with this government assassin who kidnaps her." When his face morphs into disbelief, you giggle. "I know, it doesn't sound romantic. But the writing is really good and the characters are deeply complex. They're so well mapped out. Her new series is amazing though. It's just on book two, but the main character is a cop who gets put on desk duty after an injury and each book in the series is supposed to be about solving a different cold case. The books go back and forth in time. They're great."

“Sounds interesting.” Harry chuckles, unsure of how someone could fall in love with someone who kidnaps them. It must be one of those ‘BookTok’ things that Charlotte has been going crazy over. “It sounds like she is a favorite of yours.”

"She is." You're knee to knee together in the back of his car as you head to Central Park and if it weren't so schoolgirl of you, you would reach for his hand. "You must have a favorite book?"

He shrugs slightly, searching through his memories of books he’s read. “I guess….100 Years of Solitude.” He offers, unsure of what you might think about his choice.

"A classic." One that you remember reading in college and spending weeks if not months ruminating on afterward. "Beautiful and sad. A bit like life."

“Life is always…surprising.” Harry admits. “You never have the path that you think you will when you’re younger.”

He's given himself away slightly, and you wonder if he did it on purpose. "Are you telling me little Harry didn't play financier with his stuffed animals?"

He glances out of the car, watching the people and buildings guide by. “I don’t think that I ever had stuffed animals.” He muses after a moment. “I had toys. I remember that. But I don’t think I had those.”

"I cannot explain how much that makes me want to drag you to a carnival and win you a stuffed bear at the ring toss game."

He chuckles and shakes his head. “What would I do with it?” He asks, amused that you would want to buy him something so silly.

"Put it on a shelf? Cuddle it? Look at it when you go through a room?" You tilt your head, considering him beside you. "Things don't have to be useful to bring you joy."

“Like art.” He nods, understanding what you are trying to say. He has plenty of art on his walls. Some of it is because of the value it is supposed to obtain or already has. Others are because the interior decorator picked it out. He understands the functionality of it, even if none of it ‘spoke’ to him.

"Exactly." You agree, glad that he's not looking at you with such confusion now, even if there was also amusement there. "Sometimes something silly can just make you happy. Like...if I won you a teddy bear at a carnival, I would hope that looking at it would make you think of me. That it would make you smile. That's its whole purpose. Just to make you smile."

“And pancakes make you smile.” He smiles at you softly. “Especially when they are bananas foster.”

"Right." That look on his face makes your stomach flip and your voice lighten. It brings a sigh right into your heart. "But it's...I have to be honest. Now it makes me smile because it reminds me of you."

“I knew you would like them.” He is proud that he had gotten that right, although it hadn’t been difficult to figure out. You are so open, easy to read.

"They were perfect." It feels like that was days or weeks ago and not just this morning. Something about Harry feels brand new and comfortingly familiar all at once. "It...might be the sweetest thing anybody's ever done for me, if I'm honest."

“Really?” He’s surprised and maybe a little concerned that it was so high on the list of gestures. “I’m happy that you liked it so much.”

"I really did." Your hand is itching to take his, and you end up sliding your hand under your thigh instead. It's awfully futile, as the car rolls to a stop a few seconds later, but something tells you that reaching for him in the moment would have felt...maybe desperate? Or at least needy, in that moment.

“We’re here.” He is a little disappointed that it wasn’t longer, enjoying the conversation with you. He feels like he doesn’t have to analyze every single comment and he likes that.

“It’s a beautiful night for a walk.” Something changed in his eyes just then, like a cloud drifting behind them, but you smile and try not to worry. Whatever this is between you, it’s only two days old. It’s not like the scars on your legs are from him. You don’t really have a right yet to pry or needle him for what he’s feeling in any given moment.

“It is.” He agrees, glancing down at your shoes. “Although are you sure that you will be alright in those?” He asks with a grin. “Never know how you walk in those. It’s like magic to me.”

“You might not like my secret,” you warn him with a grin. “Although it’s barely a secret, I guess.”

“Oh, I get to know a secret?” He perks up, smirking slightly. “Let me in on this.”

“There are specialty shoemakers for…larger customers. It’s not really a secret, but a lot of them make great dupes.” Holding out your foot to show him the black patent leather pump on your foot, you shrug. “These are Louboutin dupes. A hundred dollars, built to give bigger people with bigger feet style as well as comfort. But they look sheik as hell.” Are you carefully avoiding blatantly telling him you routinely buy shoes from websites and businesses aimed at drag queens? Sure. But you can’t argue with quality and you’d hate to find out he reacted poorly to the fact.

“Interesting.” He glances down at your feet and they look like they are quality. “I’ve never understood the appeal of the shoes that pinch your toes.

“These don’t.” In fact, you’re wiggling your toes right now, he just can’t see it. “They’re really well made. There’s only about two companies I actually buy shoes from anymore, just because the quality is so good.”

“Once you find a good brand and product, stick with it.” He agrees, deciding that he would snoop a little and find out what the brand is. See if he can rope Percy into letting him in the apartment to see what kind of collection you have.

“Absolutely,” you agree. “You must have preferred brands or designers, too. That’s a lot of what developing a style is.” Yours is a little more meticulous than some people’s, but that’s okay. You’ve done that for a myriad of reasons. Clients are more apt to trust a put-together looking wedding planner with a day they consider one of the most important of their lives. For you, style is branding.

“Yes.” He agrees. “Sometimes you aren’t selling more than yourself when you are with clients.” He tells you. “They trust someone who routinely looks put together, successful.” He chuckles quietly. “It’s always a ‘dress for success’ situation, isn’t it?”

“Always.” You can agree to that easily. “Dating is, too.”

There’s a pause where Harry thinks about that. “I guess you are right about that.” He admits before he offers you his arm.

Arm in arm is the perfect way to walk, and you loop your hand around his elbow easily. “There’s a trick, though. At least I think there is. Because some people don’t let don’t their walls or take off their own masks even for their partners. And then suddenly you’re not aloud to burp in your own apartment or walk around in sweats after you’ve moved in together.”

“You burp?” He feigns surprise, enjoying the way that you roll your eyes and laugh. “I didn’t think women did things like that.” He teases. “Only men burp and scratch their asses.”

“I would hate to contribute to your horror by having you find out that women are actually human,” you drawl, but the teasing is welcome. It’s a nice change from people who take themselves far too seriously. And it would be easy for Harry to take himself too seriously.

“I thought they were from Venus.” He intones seriously, tilting his head and frowning at you like you’ve just told him that the sky is purple.

“We really need to get you some updated reading material,” you tease right back.

He snorts. “That BookTok thing that I see the ladies in the office giggling over?” He asks, arching a brow. “Werewolves and operators?”

“I was thinking more like a modern medical text over a 90s pop-psych paperback, but whatever works.” The both of you are all but grinning at each other. The teasing is fun. It’s banter. It’s foreplay. “But I would kill to see the numbers you would do on BookTok. Gotta teach you the lean and get you read about fae.”

“Fae?” He looks completely perplexed and he shrugs slightly. “I have no clue what you are talking about.”

“I bet you anything that Charlotte has read half the same stuff as me.” He had told you about his sister-in-law a bit yesterday, and of course Percy had mentioned her here and there. “Don’t worry handsome, I’m not going to force you to read magical smut.”

“Isn’t it better to have sex rather than read about it?” He asks, his eyes dark and piercing when he looks at you again.

"Well...sure." But with him looking at you like that you're not sure you can even form a coherent sentence, let alone defend your reading material. "But not all of us...ya know—b-being single is a thing—" Good job dumb ass. You definitely sound like a coherent, intelligent adult.

“This is New York.” He snorts. “You can get sex any night you want. You just have to go out.” He lifts a brow at you, knowing Percy says you’re a workaholic like he is.

"You can get sex any time you want." And it absolutely isn't something meant to be a dig at yourself. Not when you first say it. It's more of a commentary on just how insanely hot he is.

He frowns at your tone and clears his throat. “Not always.” He murmurs, resenting all those times that he had been looked down on for his inadequacies.

A nerve has very obviously been touch and you have no desire to derail tonight by dredging up bad feelings or memories, so you press gently on his arm instead to make him look at you again. "Anybody who didn't get the privilege of getting to know you has lost out on how fantastic you are. Not the other way around."

He can tell you are trying to smooth ruffled feathers and console him. It’s sweet and unnecessary. He smiles at you. “Thank you.” He hums. “It’s not something I try to concern myself with.” He reaches over and pats your hand before looking at the path again.

“Sometimes it’s worth hearing from another person,” you offer. “That’s all.”

“I’ll remember that.” He walks for a few steps and then decides to ask. “What made you ask me out?” He pondered on that, because you don’t seem interested in social status or his money. He wants to know what made you go for it, especially since Percy said you didn’t normally do that.

“Honest truth?” You ask, glancing up at him. When he cocks his head at you like it’s a dumb question, you smother a laugh. “Because my gut told me I’d never meet anybody closer to the man I dream about at night. And that’s—that’s a lot — I know it is. But so far? My gut has been right.”

Your gut. He’s fond of following his gut. “You dream about someone?” He asks. “Who?”

"I don't know." That probably sounds weird, but it's true. "I think maybe my soulmate? Like...what my subconscious wants for my soulmate. Not like I'm having prophetic dreams or something."

“I would ask if you were a witch if you did.” He jokes, unsure of how to take your comment. It sounds like a compliment, but he couldn’t be that man for you because he doesn’t carry any marks from a soulmate. Never has. One girlfriend even questioned if he had a soul. It was something that honestly made Harry wonder at times.

"I don't mean it to be creepy," you clarify. "I've just always had these dreams. Domestic scenes of my future family. That kind of thing. Some people have recurring dreams where they fly or whatever. I have recurring dreams where I have a happy family."

“It’s not creepy.” He promises. “Just like you’ve dreamed about your wedding since you were little right? It’s the wanting of something. The hope.”

"I guess I must have a lot of hope, then." Since you certainly have a lot of dreams, and he seems to equate the two. "Is it...invasive? To ask what you dream about?"

“I don’t—” he frowns slightly. “I have goals…but I don’t know if they would be dreams.” He admits, wondering if you would find him creepy for that.

"Okay." He seems very focused on terminally, and you file that knowledge away. "So what are your goals, then?"

He chuckles at how simple the question seems. “Well, maintain my career success.” That’s a given. “Be a good friend. Find a romantic partner. Get married.”

"That seems pretty straightforward." It sounds like a checklist, and you wonder to yourself how many goals he has stored away in his mind that he doesn't tell people about. Impractical things. Frivolous. Fanciful. "Anything else?" You flash him that grin that he seems to love. "Or is your life complete when you get married?"

“There’s kids, but that depends on the partner.” He feels like you might be teasing him. “Hopefully stay married.”

"That usually is the hope." A gentle squeeze of his arm as you walk is as much a reassurance as it is wanting to be close to him. You feel both, and equally. "I want kids, too, for the record. And it sounds to me like you have some beautiful goals. Ones that a lot of other people would even call dreams."

“Dreams.” He hums softly, wondering if that’s what it is. Dreams. He’s never actually thought of it that way. “And what are your dreams? Behind the soulmate and kids?”

"Whoever he is, he doesn't have to be my soulmate. Just someone who loves me." He turns you down a path past some empty benches and past more trees. Central Park is beautiful, occupied with a dozen other couples tonight, all of you out for nighttime strolls. "Sometimes I think about having my own business one day. Or being able to take my kids on vacation. Give them really fantastic memories, ya know?"

He nods, although he’s never really imagined not being able to take someone on a vacation. “So you would want a wedding business?” He asks curiously.

"I think so." A couple passes you and the woman shoots you a knowing grin, as if to congratulate you on your great catch -- you shoot her the smile right back. Everyone deserves to feel good about their happiness. "I've planned other events and I think my niche really is weddings. Or at least wedding related things. Bridal showers, anniversaries, weddings, all that jazz."

“You seem to be very good at it from what I can see.” He offers with a reassuring smile. “I know plenty of my top executives that would cave under the pressure of deals and contracts and you seem to have a knack for negotiating.”

"I will take that as the highest compliment." Considering one of his top executives is your best friend, you know the caliber of person he's talking about.

“You should.” He had watched you. Not in the room unless you could when he was bringing you drinks or checking on you. But he had seen the way you took calls and handled vendors. Even when your date was interrupted you managed to stay levelheaded. He likes that about you.

“I love what I do. I think that matters.” Passion may not be everything to every person, but it certainly matters to you. It always has.

“I think it has to matter in your profession.” He agrees.

“It does.” You can agree to that. Wholeheartedly, in fact. “If I didn’t love it, I think I’d have gotten overwhelmed on the very first day.”

“How do you keep it all organized?” He asks, appreciating the way you must multitask.

"A lot of color-coding." It would probably make you seem insane to someone who didn't know how much paperwork and scheduling you have to deal with. "But it's so satisfying. Each client file gets a code, its own batch of folders, its own tabs, everything."

Color-coding. It’s simple but it sounds like it is a solid system. “That sounds….” He smirks slightly. “Solid.”

"I probably look like a psychopath to somebody from the outside," you admit, but you're laughing anyway. "I give all my clients a flower name as a code name. So I've had notes on my desk that read like indie band names or something. Teal Hyacinth and Maroon Sunflower and stuff. I admit, it sounds weird."

He does laugh now, for the simple fact that it sounds so sweet. It matches you. He shakes his head. “A romantic to your very core.”

"And if I ever pretend otherwise, I'm lying."

He nods, aware of that but you have no qualms about being honest about it. “If you deny being a romantic, you’re being held hostage.” He intones seriously.

That thought somehow strikes you as hilarious, and you practically snort with laughter. “Sure. Yes. There would absolutely be a circumstance under which somebody might hold me hostage.”

He chuckles and shrugs. “Maybe they need a wedding in a hurry and take you hostage to plan it.” It’s ridiculous, but he had been going for ridiculous just to hear that laugh some more.

It works, of course. The ring of your laugh is easily unleashed into the night air and you lean into his side a little as you walk together. “Alright, I suppose I’ll plan their hurried, villainous wedding. But you have to come rescue me when you hear our code. Deal?”

“Deal.” He grins at you, aware that he is not superhero material. “As long as there is complete adoration in your eyes when I save you.”

“I thought there always was.” When you turn your eyes up to his, you know it’s there, shining as bright as your smile. “At least…in the forty-eight hours since we met.”

He looks at you, softly and like you are wonderfully complex puzzle to solve. “Might be that I’ve overlooked that.” He teases.

“Too busy looking at my ass?” You suggest, always ready to tease him back.

Harry stops and lets go of your arm to lean back and survey your ass. “Yeah. That might just be it.” He tells you with a grin as he looks back up at your face.

Your snort of laughter rings loud and clear, making you all but throw your head back and reach for his arm all over again to steady yourself. “I’m glad you like it,” you manage, words pushed out between giggles.

He chuckles himself, wrapping your arm around his again and tugs you closer. “I do.” It might be a little bit of a surprise, but your fuller figure is sexy.

“Glad to hear it.” It isn’t something you’re going to take for granted. Not when a man like Harry Castillo — who could have anyone — is choosing to spend his time with you.

“Although you have to tell me what you see in me.” He hums playfully, sliding his gaze back over to you.

Ah. A touch of insecurity cracking the surface is actually a comfort. It’s nice to know he doesn’t know how perfect he is. “Do you want the complete list?”

“I doubt it’s a list.” He snorts, shaking his head at you.

“You’re intelligent,” you begin with the most obvious and start ticking off fingers. “And clever, those are different things. Kind. Funny. Sweet. Romantic, although I can’t tell yet if you’re surprising yourself and me with that. You care very deeply about the people in your life. You’re respectful. And curious. You ask questions and give things so much thought. Oh.” Holding up your tenth finger, you shoot him a sly grin. “And you’re smoking hot. Even if you are a little taller than my usual type.”

He frowns at you. “You like shorter men?” He huffs in disbelief. “No one likes shorter men, not really.” Although your list is incredibly flattering, your last nugget of information has him floored.

“You’ve never heard of a short king?” You ask him incredulously. It probably seems odd coming from a woman of above average height, but you were not always this tall. Not by any means. “I mean it works out, because you’re taller than me and I like to wear heels, but I swear. For most of my life I’ve date guys who were like…5’6” or 5’7” and the absolute tallest.”

“Oh.” He frowns slightly and looks down at his body and then back at you speculatively. “I’ve never- you really dated men that height? On purpose?”

“Yeah.” You have to laugh at his incredulousness, but you get it. Most men think being short is a curse. “It took a long time before I hit my…I call it my ‘last big growth spurt’. I guess you could argue that I like guys around my height and I was pretty short.”

You are shorter than the last five women he had dated. He normally preferred a woman around 5’9” or 5’10”. Thinking that he would have tall children if he had kids with them. But he’s been drawn to you despite that. “That’s interesting.” He admits softly.

“I know there’s all kinds of things about how tall men are supposed to be vastly superior, but I think it’s all personal perspective.” He sounds oddly introspective about the topic, so your mind immediately spins, trying to talk through it. “Like when men say they want a woman with a sense of humor, they mean they want a woman who laughs at their jokes. But when woman say they want a man with a sense of humor? What they mean is that they want someone who makes them laugh. I guess, from my perspective, all that ever mattered was that my perfect guy would be just a little taller than me so he can be my big spoon and I can gaze up at him adoringly on a daily basis.”

“You like being the little spoon.” He chuckles, unsure of how he feels about your observations. You’re right about the sense of humor thing. From what he can tell, most men want women to think they are funny.

“Do you like being the big spoon?” Asking the question with an air of life or death gravitas through your smile is just a way to make him smile in turn.

“I like-“ he pauses and tilts his head as he thinks about it. “Facing my lover.” He says, as he thinks through the last few lovers and how he’s held them. “So we can kiss. Although I like putting my leg up over hers.” He looks at you. “What does that say?”

“I’m not a psychologist, but it sounds like you crave connection.” Walking together, you’ve slowed your pace a little and you can see the bridge up ahead. “I like that.”

“But I can’t sleep touching.” He adds quickly, as if that might completely change your outlook.

A curious eyebrow raise. “Do you get too warm? Toss and turn?”

“I like to sleep on my side.” He admits. “Hugging a pillow.”

Instinctively, the awwe that passes your lips is soft. “The image of you all comfy in bed is…it’s very sweet,” you admit.

He snorts, never been described as sweet before. “I guess.” He chuckles.

“Doesn’t take compliments well,” you hum. He had said the same thing about you and it seems you share that characteristic.

“Personal ones.” He admits that freely. “Professional ones I will soak up like a sponge.”

"Noted." You beam a smile at him. "Although I will not promise not to compliment you."

“I wouldn’t expect it.” He promises. “Just like I won’t promise not to tell you that you look stunning tonight. That dress is….” He groans. “Very sexy.”

“I’m going to start keeping track of your favorite pieces of my wardrobe,” you tease. Not that your closet is very big. Or full. It won’t take long for him to see everything.

“Oh am I getting a color-coded folder?” He asks, amused by the idea. “I don’t have a wedding or event to plan.” He points out. “I’m assuming this is a personal file?”

“I’ll have to give you a code name.” The fact that he’s happy to go along with the joke makes you both smile, and you wish you’d kissed him already so you could do it now freely. “What is your favorite flower? Or color?”

“I don’t think I have a favorite flower.” He admits with a rueful chuckle. “And black is my favorite color. It goes with anything.”

"Thank god you didn't say dahlias," you smother a laugh. "I am not calling your folder after a famous unsolved murder."

“That might be taken as a bad omen.” He laughs, stopping when the bridge comes into sight. “There she is.”

"She's beautiful..." A bridge is such a simple thing, conceptually speaking. This little oasis amongst the winding paths and curated beauty of Central Park is welcoming. Practically beckoning. Like a balcony waiting with baited breath for a Juliet.

“There have been quite a few weddings here.” Harry tells you. “I saw one just last year. Obviously the park doesn’t want to shut down for hours, but this is a romantic little spot for a small ceremony.”

"I would imagine a lot of couples come walking here on early dates." Just like you are, you think with a grin. "I can see it being a favorite memory to tie into your wedding."

“It’s a nice spot.” He agrees. “Outdoors, fresh air.” He nods towards a vendor selling ice cream. “Simple and satisfying treats.”

"I can't tell if you like simple things or not." And that isn't a judgement call, either. It's just an observation. Harry is a bit of an enigma in the way he holds himself, and it feels like it's by design.

“Who doesn’t like ice cream?” He huffs, almost insulted as he guides you towards the cart. “Especially on a warm night. Sticky and sweet.”

"Well sure." Hell, you're not one to say no to a cold, sweet treat either. "But I feel like you should be surrounded by Michelin pastry chefs crafting personalized flavors for you."

“Are you saying that you think I’m a snob?” He sounds shocked but his face is grinning, telling you that he enjoys thinking about that first interaction you had. “That I’m bougie?”

"You're definitely bougie," you giggle, letting him pull you into line for the ice cream cart. "I never said you were a snob."

“You implied it about my alcohol.” He reminds you as he scans the board with all the flavors listed. “Now I guess I have to order vanilla instead of the double chocolate, caramel crunch swirl.”

The broad grin that sweeps over your face is unapologetic. Borderline shit-eating. “I was trying to get you to talk to me,” you admit, fully unashamed. “It worked.”

“And what would you have said if I had just been drinking a Stella?” He wants to know, enjoying your little self satisfaction.

“I might have started in on something else. Baseball or music.” It would have been whatever occurred to you in the moment. Impulse tended to work in your favor when you were first meeting people. Spontaneity.

“See but you would have instantly lost me talking about baseball.” He jokes. “Since you like the Phillies.”

“Cardinals!” You correct him, giggling as the two of you step up to the front of the line.

“I distinctly remember you saying the Phillies.” He counters, shaking his head in mock rumination, even though he knows you had said the Cardinals.

“I would never say the Phillies.” You huff, rolling your eyes when the girl at the ice cream cart brightly asks Harry what he would like to order.

“I am going to have vanilla.” He pouts, just to make you huff and slap his arm. “No. Not really. Can I have a scoop of the double chocolate Carmel crunch swirl?” He asks politely, grinning at you. “And whatever this wonderful lady would like?”

“I’ll have the same,” you tell the girl, having barely processed anything in the moment besides Harry’s sweet playfulness. You’re not sure you could name another ice cream flavor on that cart if you tried.

“Are you sure?” He isn’t trying to undermine you. “If you want something else, we can share?”

“Chocolate and caramel is a superlative combination,” you insist, but he radiates one doubtful eyebrow at you, and you roll your eyes again. “Fine, I was distracted by you being charming and handsome. I admit it.” It doesn’t, though, take long to decide and a few seconds later you’re asking the amused looking employee for a scoop of s’mores swirl.

He snorts as he pulls out his wallet to pay. Amused by the claim of distraction. It’s quickly scooped up into bowls and he leads you towards the bridge. “At least you get dessert tonight.”

“I’m sorry I had to run out.” He knows you are, and he understands, but it bears repeating.

“No apologies are necessary.” He promises you. “If anyone understands, it’s probably me.” He chuckles. “Plenty of women that I’ve dated don’t seem to realize how much I actually work.” He had accepted it, even if it had ruined several prospects. “They thought I just….made money.” Harry gestures vague towards a tree. “Like I have an orchard of money trees.”

“That” you swallow a lick of ice cream. “Would be an extremely cool orchard.”

“It would.” He agrees, spooning up a particularly delectable bite of his ice cream and offers it out to you to taste.

You offer him the same, making both of you grin in the sugar-sweet moment. “Tricky to harvest though. Bills must blow away like leaves.”

“Does that count as pissing money away?” He asks before he takes the bite you offer him.

“Maybe,” you snort. “Or maybe just letting it fly away.”

The reaction to your ice cream is a loud groan of pleasure. “That’s good.”

“Right?” You giggle a little at the reaction, but you fully agree. “I was such a s’mores kid growing up.”

“It’s good, but I’ve always been a salty sweet caramel kind of person.” He admits. “It’s the best.”

“Noted.” One more detail to tick away in the back of your mind. Another puzzle piece of who he is.

He tilts his head playfully. “Should I just send over a report to put in the file?” He teases.

“Nope.” Playfully bumping your shoulder against just, you’re grinning all over again. “It’s more fun to find out organically.”

Both of you casually stroll over the bridge as you eat your ice cream. “So you like bananas foster and s’mores.” He chuckles. “I bet your third favorite dessert is Baked Alaska.”

“Actually?” You brandish your spoon, thinking back and finishing your bite of ice cream. “I’ve never had a Basked Alaska. My third favorite dessert would probably be…raspberry cheesecake.”

Raspberry cheesecake. He smirks slightly at you and tilts his head back to the ice cream cart. “They have cheesecake ice cream back there that you add your own fruit swirl to.”

"Next time." In your gut, you know it isn't too cocky to assume there will be a next time. It's a natural, easy progression. But you are in danger of losing your thread of sanity a little if you don't manage a good night kiss tonight.

“Next time.” He can agree to that. At the top of the bridge he stops, turning to look out over the water. “It’s always peaceful here.”

"Sometimes a little peace is worth more than almost anything else." It's a quiet night by New York standards, and looking out over the park together is heart-flutteringly rom com.

“Priceless.” Harry agrees, spooning up the last bite of his ice cream and sighing. “Absolutely priceless.”

"Harry?" Standing in companionable quiet side by side, you put your empty ice cream cup down on the edge of the bridge and tilt your head to have a better look at him. Patently unfair -- the man is so gorgeous that he glows in the moonlight.

“Hmmm?” He turns to look at you. Not just giving you a turn of the head, but his entire body twists to face you.

"Expecting you to read my mind is completely unrealistic, so I'm going to put it out there instead." And pretty much shiver with nerves on your heels in the process, but you're trying to be an adult here. "I--would really like to kiss you tonight."

“Now?” He asks, shocked but trying to hide it. Not even sure why he’s shocked. You’ve been very open about where you stand with him. “Or when I drop you off at home?”

"It doesn't have to be either, if you're not comfortable with it," you clarify, but you can feel the pit of your stomach bottom out. Just standing around and waiting for a man to hand you your perfect rom com dream is unrealistic and potentially a little unhinged, so you've always resolved to be up front with people about how you feel. That doesn't mean you want to be pushy or demanding. Or worse, come off as entitled.

He can read it in your eyes. You want this to be the moment. Harry steps closer and his hand slowly curves around your thick hip to pull you close. “I don’t think it gets any better than right now.” He admits.

The urge to protest that you weren't trying to push is smothered as quickly as meeting his eyes. While it may not have been at the forefront of his mind, he's leaning in so easily that there can't be any hesitation in it. Any protest you could have conjured dies on your tongue just before your eyes flutter shut.

You close your eyes before he kisses you. His lips curve at the discovery and there is a chuckle in his throat when his mouth presses against yours. Immediately coming out as a groan before dying off all together because of the soft, sweet texture of your lips and how it makes his stomach immediately clench in pleasure and want.

His hand stills on your hip in that moment, freezing entirely before fully giving over to the feeling and pulling you even closer so his arm can slide around your back. One of your hands has found a place on his chest but the other makes it all the way to the curls at the base of his neck and you swear the whole world has just tipped on its access. This sweet man tastes even sweeter, and you just might float away altogether if you don’t hang on to him.

There’s a skill to kissing. He’s been told he’s a good kisser before. Several times. He’s not thinking about skill right now. He’s not thinking at all beyond wanting more.

It’s like drowning in a lifeboat, where the thing you need to save you is also the exact thing that is threatening to pull you under. If you never stop kissing him it will already be too soon, but at the same time? A girl’s got to breathe.

You pull back suddenly, almost gasping and for a split second, Harry thinks that you might not have enjoyed the kiss. Until he sees your face. Until your eyes flutter open.

“Sorry,” you murmur sheepishly, cheeks burning hot, and eyes soft and dreamy. “Forgot how to breathe for a second there.”

The slow smile that crosses his face is one of delayed satisfaction. Like he’s just processed what that means. “Stole your breath away?” He asks teasingly.

“Maybe.” Definitely. But the smirk that curls into the corner of your mouth isn’t judging or knowing or proud. It’s delighted.

“Good.” He pulls you closer. “Let me steal it again?”

You mean, sliding both arms around his neck. “Does it count as stealing if I give it away freely?”

He considers that for a moment and then shakes his head. “It’s all about intent.” He decides with a smirk before coming in for another kiss.

------ Master Tags: @pixiedurango @chattychell @winter-fox-queen @lady-himbo @artsymaddie @princess76179 @paintballkid711 @missminkylove @pedrosbrat @ew-erin @sarahjkl82-blog @sharkbait77 @justanotherblonde23 @lv7867 @recklesswit @mylittlesenaar @f0rever15elf @gallowsjoker @steeevienicks @athalien @sherala007 @skvatnavle @thatpinkshirt @jaime1110 @girlimjusttryingtoreadfanfics @goodgriefitsawildworld @greeneyedblondie44 @littlemousedroid @harriedandharassed @churchill356 @ajathegreats-blog @haylzcyon @beardsanddetectives @kirsteng42 @ladykatakuri @adancedivasmom @madiebear @tanzthompson @emilianamason @bigsdinger @xocalliexo @pedr0swh0r3 @avaleineandafryingpan @charlyrmv @avidreader73 @iceclaw101 @loveslide @elegantduckturtle @becsworld @julesonrecord @its-nebuleuse @itsrubberbisquit @mikeyswifie @guelyury @lizzie-cakes @for-a-longlongtime @vabeachazn @purplerain04 @weho2kcmo @madnessofadaydreamer

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