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#Thinking about getting a doctorate so I'm gonna have the time
allllium · 2 days
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Could I request a one shot with Simon Riley, where he is in a secret relationship. And one night when he was on a mission, at their shared home, one of their enemies (that they are hunting down in that mission) comes and kidnaps them. When they find the base where the enemy was, Riley went in to see his girlfriend being tortured? She gets rescued by him and seeks medical attention, as she passes out? But when she wakes up in the hospital it turns into a really fluffy moment? Maybe he gets on one knee?????
Not so Secret
~ I really hope I did your idea justice 🤞 I'm the best at writing for Simon yet or angsty hurty stuff so hopefully you enjoy this sweet little moment
~ Fluff, Torture (Mentioned), WC: 1,559
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~ Simon can't live without you
Simon can feel his heart beating out of his chest. You're gonna be fine, he keeps reminding himself. No one on the team has anything in the last couple hours. Good thing. Simon might lose his mind if they try to make small talk in this situation. You're gonna be fine, he reminds himself again, leaning his head against the wall.
You were taken by the enemy team on what was supposed to be a perfectly safe mission. Get the information and get out. Simple. It only took an hour before they found you but in that time you were badly injured. You're alive he mutters under his breath. He can feel Price's eyes burning a hole into him but he still doesn't say anything.
Simon practically jumps out of his chair when the doctor comes through the door. Ignoring every word that comes out the doctors mouth, he pushes his way past and into your room. Price can deal with all the details, right now Simon just needs to see you. Just confirm that you're alive.
You're sleeping when he walks in. More like knocked out with drugs but either way you look peaceful. As peaceful as you can with bruises covering your face. He carefully takes a seat next to the bed. He lets out a deep breath as he sits there watching you. Thinking over everything that happened that day and everything he could have done to stop it, which was nothing.
He sits there long enough to doze off, something he rarely ever does when not in the comfort of his own home. You're presence just has the ability to make him feel comfortable anywhere.
"You're lucky it hurts to move or I'd have drawn a mustache on your face." You voice draws him awake.
"No one would see it through the mask." He responds, keeping his eyes closed. It's a weird feeling, having someone you love in the hospital. He doesn't want to open his eyes, he doesn't want to believe you got hurt.
"I'd know it's there and that's enough for me. Look at me Simon." You demand. He listens, opening his eyes to the brightness of the hospital room. The white walls, white lights, and white ceiling don't strike him as the best thing for healing patients.
"How are you feeling?" He asks, looking into your eyes.
"I'm alright, and you?" You sit up in the uncomfortable bed as an attempt to get more comfortable.
"I'm not the one in a hospital bed." He whispers. Eyes darting all over the room.
"True. It's not the funnest." You crack a small smile. You know exactly how he thinks, how much he blames himself. You know it's a result of trauma and you want nothing more than to be able to reassure him in times like this Unfortunately, words aren't enough to undo this way of thinking. "Join me?" You pat the empty space on the bed.
"No." He replies instantly, immediately worried about injuring you further.
"Okay I might have phrased that like a question but it wasn't. Get on this bed and sit with me so I can feel better."
He stays silent. Debating the options he has. Or more so the options he doesn't have.
"You have two seconds or I'm coming to you."
That gets him moving. At this point he knows better than to dismiss your threats. Before moving however, he takes a moment to take off his mask, something he never wears when it's just the two of you.
"Fine, you know you're not supposed to leave that bed yet." He tries to keep a demanding tone but to you it's just laced with concern. You have a wide grin on your face as he scooches in the bed with you. You end half way on top of him with how small the bed is.
"So what happened while I was sleeping?" You ask, absentmindedly tracing the tattoo on his arm.
"I have no idea. I've been here." He keeps his sentences short and simply. A habit he's picked up over the years.
"The whole time? Aw you big softy." Your heart flutters at his confession.
"M' not."
"Mhm. Whatever you say." You chuckle softly.
"Do you need anything? Water? Food? Drugs?" He kisses your forehead.
"I'm alright. Now stop it."
"Stop what? I'm trying to be helpful."
"No you're blaming yourself. I know you." You lean up in order to look into his eyes. He may be secretive but his eyes aren't.
"I'm not. I'm just thinking of all the ways I can protect you in the future."
"Okay let's say that I believe you. How would you stop this from happening again? You weren't even there." At this point you're sitting up as much as you can, putting an arm on Simon's chest to keep you upright.
"Well right now I'm thinking of locking you in my house so you can never leave and therefore never be hurt." He tells you, being completely serious.
"I'm gonna ignore that because you would like a stalker." You laugh. "Where's the rest of the guys?"
"Outside. I locked the door when I came in."
"Simon! Go unlock the door." You want to say you're surprised but not even a little bit of it is out of the ordinary for Simon.
"No. I'm comfortable here. And I don't wanna go back to acting all professional."
"Simon, you've been in here for what I'm guessing is hours considering it's now nighttime with the door locked. I don't think our secret is much of a secret."
"Maybe not. But I want you all to myself." The look on his face reminds you of a sad puppy. Which is a face he makes very often.
"And you say you're not a softy." You scoff.
"I'm not!" He exclaims, trying hard to protect his reputation that you don't believe for a second.
"Whatever you say, sweetie." You smirk as his face lights up a shade of red. Here we have a massive, cold, military man, blushing at one simply pet name, it's enough to give anyone a huge ego.
After you're little period of talking, you fall into a comfortable silence. With you laying back down onto his chest.
"How are you feeling?" He asks after just a few minutes.
"I'm okay." You quickly reaffirm him. "How about you."
"I'm fine."
"Nope tell me the truth. You've asked me that many times now."
"Just checking."
"Simon."
"I love you." He says out of nowhere.
"I love you too."
"Can we get married."
"What?!" You shoot up, wincing in the process.
"I wanna get married."
"Now??" You practically yell. Of course you wanna marry him but you're really confused.
"No I mean later. I just wanna know that we will."
"You mean be engaged?" You can't stop the strange expression that your face makes as you try and decifer what he means.
"Is that not what you want?" He asks, the fear evident in his voice.
"That's not what I said. But we've never talked about marriage I mean not as deep as we should have. I don't want you to want to marry me just because I got hurt." You start to ramble, talking so fastcyou don't even know if he can understand you. He can. He's gotten used to your nervous rambles.
He smiles bigger than you think you've ever seen him. "I've wanted to marry you since the moment we first met."
"Okay you sound more and more like a stalker the more you talk."
"Is that a no?"
"No, it's a we can be engaged as long as you're being serious. And we'll stay engaged for a while because we're not ready to be married anytime soon."
"So next months not gonna work for you?" He laughs, genuinely laughs.
"No I think I'm busy then." You retort. You want to marry him, you know that for sure, but not until you're healed, and not until you both get better at being together.
"I can wait."
"Can you go let the guys in? Cuz the way you're staring at me is making me nervous."
"I love you."
"Door, Simon."
You try to surpress the wild grin on your face as he gets up to open the door for the others. They all walk in with matching suspicious smirks.
"What have I said about eavesdropping?" You immediately question, looking right at Soap.
"Not to do it." He looks down at his feet like a child being scolded.
"That's right, yet here you are."
"It's not my fault!" He immediately defends himself and points to Price. "He's the one that walked by the door and talk me you were talking about marriage."
You turn your sharp gaze over to Price, "and here I thought you were the responsible one." You shake your head in disappointment. You can hear Simon and Gaz laughing behind them. Being more than amused at the scolding you give you captain.
"You're right. I will reflect on my actions and do better in the future." He jokes.
Also shaking his head, Simon makes his way back to your bedside. Sitting beside you and putting an arm around your waist. You have a feeling now that your secrets out he won't keep his hands off you. But you're okay with that.
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changetyre · 2 days
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Ouch II Charles Leclerc x Reader
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SUMMARY: One of the things Charles had to learn about you when you started dating was your ability to get hurt with just about anything and anyone who crosses your path.
WARNINGS: short, minor injuries, dizziness, allergies.
A/N: Inspired by me and my proneness to injury which has been on an all-time high this month 🥲
"Tss-" Charles's head popped up immediately at the sound of you hissing, a million scenarios running through his head about how you'd injured yourself this time.
"What happened mon amour?" He rushed over to you watching as you clutched your finger tightly, your face contorted in pain.
"I closed the cupboard on my finger somehow." You showed Charles the small blood blister forming on your finger where you'd pinched a piece of skin.
"Cherie what am I gonna do with you." Charles held your injured finger placing a small kiss on it before bringing you into a hug.
_____
"Oh my god Charlie look!" You spotted at a big dandelion field on one of your walks with your boyfriend.
"Amour wait-" Charles wasn't fast enough to stop you as you happily ran to it. "Just be careful please." he didn't have the heart to stop you as you ran through it.
"Charlie take a picture of me!" You happily giggled as you watched the white fuzz rise around you.
Charles laughed gladly capturing the moment in his phone. It all seemed too perfect.
As you walked the rest of the way home Charles noticed you kept scratching at your hands and arms. "What's wrong my love?" he asked.
"Nothing." He knew you always tried to play your discomfort and pain down.
"Let me see." He grabbed your hand gently bringing your arms into view which were growing rashes. Charles gasped at the sight. "Amour!"
"I think I might be allergic to dandelions." You looked so defeated it tugged at Charles's heart. He was glad you were wearing jeans impeding your legs from rashing too.
"Aww mon bebe." Charles kissed your temple. "C, mon let's get you to the doctor." He held your hand as you left the house once more.
_______
"He's good, and has a lot of potential." You and Charles chatted casually as he washed the dishes while you dried them and put them away.
"He's young though, I'd hate for the same thing to-" You gasped as a plate slipped from your hand, you tried to catch it but it had already broken by the time you tried to save it.
"Cherie you okay?" Charles quickly dried his hands rushing to you.
"I'm fine just ugh, a broken plate." you sighed frustrated as you leaned down to start cleaning up.
"It's just a plate darling you sure you're alright?" Charles crouched down with you.
"Yes I- Oww." you pulled your hand away quickly after trying to grab a large piece of the broken plate. "Oh my god, why?!" You were frustrated with yourself for not being more careful.
"Let me see." Charles pulled your hand towards him seeing the small but deep cut on your palm starting to bleed a lot. "Okay come here." Despite his worry, Charles wasn't fazed with your injuries anymore always quick to jump into action. He grabbed a paper towel wrapping it around your hand.
"It doesn't even hurt just stings a little-" Charles hated the way you always got so disappointed with yourself after getting hurt.
"It's okay amour, just hold it and keep your hand up while I fetch the first aid kit." He kissed your cheek before rushing off.
_______
"and then the next thing I know Steph is on one of the tables grinding on some random dude-" You paced around the living room telling Charles about last night through tears of laughter.
"No way!" Charles laughed with you picturing the scene, hoping he could've been there with you.
"Yes and so Freya was trying to get her down and somehow ends up getting lifted onto the table herself-" you could barely catch your breath between laughter. "You should've seen her face, she was mortified when the dude and Steph started dancing on her-" you wiped the tears from under your eyes.
"What did you do?" Charles laughed more so from your laughter than the story itself.
"Well Freya was looking at me with like this plea for help so I-" a loud thud silenced you. "Fuck-" You cursed as you'd managed to hit your funny bone in the corner of the wall hard.
"You okay baby?" Charles immediately sat up.
He watched you rub at your elbow. "Yeah I-" You stumbled a little making him rush to stable you. "Ooh, I'm a little light-headed."
"You must've hit your funny bone pretty hard." He carried you to the couch with him and your vision went blurry for a few seconds.
"That was weird." you opened and closed your hand as pins and needles filled your arm.
"It's okay baby I've got you." Charles pulled you into his side.
You sighed, waiting for the feeling and lightheadedness to pass.
"I'm sorry." you apologized to Charles as you nustled into his chest.
"What are you sorry for amour?!" Charles cupped your cheek making you face him.
"For always making you worry and not being careful enough, I obviously don't do it on purpose but maybe if I was more careful and-" You started.
"Hey shh-" Charles shushed you with a sweet kiss. "Don't be silly." He hugged you tighter. "I love you just the way you are, injuries and all even if I prefer you never got injured again. It's just the way you are and to me it's perfect."
You couldn't help but giggle. "I love you Charlie." You looked up at him, cupping his cheek this time so you could kiss him.
"I love you more, my injury-prone girlfriend." He kissed you again.
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girlishwhimsies · 2 days
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Hey there! First I just wanna say that I'm a new follower and that I love your blog, especially CherryCola. I was wondering (idk if anyone has asked) if you could please write something about the day baby CherryCola was born and the first time the gang meets her. Thanks and please keep doing what you're doing because your blog is awesome!
idk if you mean like write a fic or just yap but i have too many wip so you’ll just get a yap i fear. ALSO IM SO GLAD YOU ENJOY MY BLOG AHHH i love all of these new people i get to yap with <3
that day would be an absolute mess i fear 😭💀 first of all kat would have been an early baby, probably a few weeks before cherrys due date so they are all immediately panicking this was NOT the plan.
soda and cherry would be oddly calm like they are just chilling on their way to the hospital (cherry was at the curtis house when her water broke and called soda asap then the doctor and he picked her up and then they head the hospital, all ready and excited yknow. although soda would be PISSED he isn’t allowed to be in the room
meanwhile the gang is FREAKING OUT they were NOT ready and all rush to the hospital as soon as they find out, worrying they are gonna miss it or that something is gonna go wrong, etc etc. they would all show up out of breath and asking to see cherry (marcia would also tag along but she drives herself and is much for orderly)
i feel like girl would be there for a while so kat woudnt even be born until the next morning and girl is tinyyyyyyy. soda would absolutely cry when he gets to hold her for the first time and even cherry would be tearing up. they’d just be so so so excited to finally meet her 🥹 they would be chatty cathy’s too like just yapping to her constantly. 
THE GANGS REACTIONS MY LOVE!!! they would have been waiting a while to get called in and be so hype when they get to do in. dally would refuse to hold her but smile at her when he thinks no one is looking. steve probably just stares at her and is so stressed when he holds her for the first time like what if he accidentally drops her. two-bit would be so fucking excited dude would be bouncing her already (with proper neck support tho) and giving her a nickname and everything. ace would be so in awe that that’s her friends baby johnny would be shocked they ask him to hold her tbh 😭 he’d be so so so gentle with her tho, making sure to hold her right and everything. pony would immediately say some comment about how she looks stupid and soda would smack him upside the head. darry would be too nervous to hold her but would hug soda and tell him how proud he is of soda would stepping up and being a father 
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babymagi · 1 year
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I'm realizing now that I've spent a little under 3 years basically carrying the Judar/Alibaba tag on ao3
The first fic I posted about them was in September of 2020
And now these two are basically my entire personality
I've posted 40 fics on that tag, there's 68 fics total
I have a PROBLEM
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expelliarmus · 10 months
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seaweedstarshine · 4 months
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Late to the game as I’ve kinda been kinda non-here for a minute but I scrolled through the Dot and Bubble tag, and thought I wanted to write this post into existence.
There's this part in Doctor Who Unleashed where RTD says this:
“What we can’t tell is how many people will have worked that out before the ending. Because they’ve seen white person after white person after white person, and television these days is very diverse. I wonder, will you be ten minutes into it, will you be fifteen, will you be twenty, before you start to think, everyone in this community is white. And if you don’t think that — why didn’t you? So, that’s gonna be interesting. I hope it’s one of those pieces of television you see, and always remember.”
And I'm like. Yeah. But the reason this works even as well as it does is largely thanks to the work of the previous showrunner with the previous creative team, which was notably the first era to have any writers of color (amongst other firsts in terms of inclusivity in directors, composer, actors). While Chibnall fumbled whenever he tried to write about race himself, he did have the self-awareness to have Black and South Asian writers writing the episodes where race is the focus (and a female writer for the episode where sexism is a focus; my point is, he seemed to know his shortcomings).
I wonder what the current creative team looks like? (not really, but I wasn't 100% sure for all of them)
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To quote RTD:
“...before you start to think, everyone in this community is white.”
This is pretty non-self-aware, right? It's pretty “It is said, and I understand this, there was a history of racism with the original Toymaker, the Celestial Toymaker, who had ‘celestial,’ and I did not know this, but ‘celestial’ can mean of Chinese origin, but in a derogatory way,” right? (from The Giggle Unleashed) It's pretty “and I had problems with that, and a lot of us on the production team had problems with that: associating disability with evil,” right? (from Destination Skaro Unleashed)
—none of which are issues that should be overlooked, but think how much exponentially better they might’ve been addressed if he’d consulted with Chinese writers and wheelchair-using writers before going straight to giving the Toymaker weird fake accents and making Davros walk?
How many Black or non-white people do we think saw the Dot and Bubble script before it landed in Ncuti’s hands?
And this just keeps happening.
And like, from some of the shocked responses I've seen from white viewers to the ending of Dot and Bubble, maybe the episode's unsubtlety was needed? From the way RTD talks about it in Unleashed, the episode was written with a white audience in mind, Baby's First Microaggressions (where of course the microaggressions come from people who are pretty self-admittedly white supremacists). Ricky September, a more seemingly normal depiction of someone in the racist bubble of Finetime, seemed like an interesting element, up until the way he died.
The ending worked for me, because I do think the Doctor's reaction is true to how the Doctor would react. I just keep thinking of how much better the core themes could've been handled by someone with actual lived experience on the subject matter.
#dot and bubble#fifteenth doctor#rtd critical#anti rtd#ricky september#lindy pepper bean#dw negativity#racism#antiblackness#words by seaweed#not to be anti rtd. im just very critical. Anti RTD is just a tag which people use or block#every showrunner has their flaws but RTD is the only one self-righteously virtu signling over NOTHING. which is why im more critical.#plus the on-set sxual hrassment and what happened with Chris Eccleston etc. it vindicates me. idk. not tryna be a hater#ALSO dot and bubble is leaps and bounds better than any racism commentary I expected from Russell T Davies. so theres that.#can you tell I'm shy abt making long posts that someone is likely gonna be not happy about-#I usually search tumblr for posts to rb and talk in tags. but I couldnt find any posts about this this morning! tho I think ppl have since#etc its fine to critically appreciate imperfect media etc I do it all the time (as a Black fan) (who also thinks Rosa has Flaws) etc#I did see someone on twitter pointing out the hypocrisy of all white writers but twitter does not have space to talk about things#also love that The Church on Ruby Road has Mark Tonderai who became the first black director w The Ghost Monument. I love his directing#but that's the Christmas special. it is not part of this season. and honestly fr it's not close to enough#love the inclusivity in front of the camera. lets get some of that in the writing team NOW. it's hurting for it.#bring back Charlene James. can you hear me? was the best episode of Season 12.#the ep felt like a commentary on the “RIP Doctor Who” ppl under every official Doctor Who post? hence social media?#it does work best that way!! it just felt a little off of that way in rtd talking#idk im rambling. I did enjoy it tho. I just wish. but well.
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rox-of-iu · 1 year
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some general Mu Qingfangs because i care him :)
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dug some oldies out + made more for no special occasion whatsoever haha :^) hsjdkhaskfdjsdl
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pandaspwnz · 8 months
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FUCK brain fog, all my homies HATE brain fog
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thegempage · 14 days
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i don't feel like looking for it rn bcus of the mood i find myself in but i need to like. tattoo that post about wishing your mind would be kinder to you and then remembering that you have to do that on my fucking eyelids.
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felinelun · 2 years
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Doctors and word "sexy", because why not, it's 3 a.m. and I have to wake up at 7
First Doctor: Looks like someone who'd make others wash their mouth with soap if he hears them using the word ("Young Man! Yes, yes, you, mr. Chesterfield, what was that just now? How old are you, hm?! Well, you are clearly too young to use the word!"), but actually he'd be the one to call something "very sexy, very sexy indeed" at the most unexpected of all moments and then just run away with no explanation, chuckling mischievously.
Second Doctor: Completely forgot meaning of the word. Still used it anyway cluelessly. Until Jamie explained it to him one day. The Doctor listened and called Jamie "rather sexy, than", blushing slightly. And then proceeded to torture his recorder, playing "Twinkle twinkle little star" on it.
Third Doctor: Only the Six Doctor uses word "sexy" more frequent than him. Brigadier thinks he has no subordination and gives bad example to the stuff. But once he secretly smiles when the Doctor uses the word right in front of some high government official to describe the idea of a new nature preservation law.
Fourth Doctor: Finds blowing stuff up and fighting giant mutant rats very sexy. An example:
Doctor: Look at that rocket over there, Sarah Jane! Isn't it sexy?
Sarah Jane: Oh, it's very sexy, Doctor!
Doctor: Shame, it's full of highly dangerous weapons that will be banned on every civilised planet very soon in this century... So, I'm afraid, we'll have to blow it up until some of those solders gets into it and delivers those weapons on some innocent world! *proceeds to smile insanely*
Do not finds falling from big heights sexy. At all.
Fifth Doctor: Looks like someone who wouldn't now the word. Or who'd pretend not to... One day Tegan decided to explain it to him, just for the fun of it, but just ended up with Nyssa getting rather confused about life, universe and everything. Seeing the situation the Doctor paled a bit, than blushed a little, than started rambling something about lifespan of a Venusian infusoria and than intercepted the Master's TARDIS trace all of a sudden.
He blushed a little again.
Six(y) Doctor: Ah, Pery, just look at this sexy young man! So dashing, so outstanding!
Pery: Doctor. That's a mirror.
The Doctor: Exactly! Now, take a step away, don't obstruct me from admiering the defiance of sexyness itself!
Seventh Doctor: Finds manipulation, fighting lovecraftian horrors and killing hundreds to save millions sexy. And no, when the Master does it, it is called tyranny, world domination and genocide.
Eighth Doctor: Thinks the Universe is sexy. The feeling is not mutual.
War Doctor: Has more important things to worry about.
Ninth Doctor: Is not sure in anything anymore, but if there's something he can tell you certainly it's that daleks and PTSD are Not sexy At all.
Tenth Doctor: Looks like somebody who'd use the word 24/7, but actually said "sexy" only two times in his life and just to impress a companion.
Eleventh Doctor: Looks like somebody who'd use the word to call his car without completely understanding it. And is exactly that person, except one day Amy explained the word to him. Well, he proceeded to call his car "sexy", because what else!
Twelfth Doctor: At first used his sonic sunglasses because he thought they looked sexy. Than lost any way to see if anything is sexy at all. The sunglasses kinda lost their appeal afterwards.
Thirteenth Doctor: Thinks the Universe and repressing PTSD is sexy. The feeling is not mutual.
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mieczyhale · 2 months
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my sister changed her profile pic from some pro-cop bs to trump 2024
she's got FAS and is very much a parrot (she copies what she hears around her. i.e being shit to my mom bc my dad is. he's been the biggest influence the last year as they were kinda stuck in the same room together) unintentionally so i know it's most likely that spending time around my dad when he watches the news is the culprit-
but that doesn't make me feel less angry and lowkey betrayed by it
and i can't say anything about it
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somelazyassartist · 3 months
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I hate the doctors I don't ever want to go ever <- person with so many medical issues
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doctorweebmd · 3 months
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afa;ldf;lakdflk;asdf urgh sorry i've been MIA i unexpectedly got super busy with the grant and my grand rounds and having to pick up shifts for people with emergencies/illnesses/moving PLUS my 'graduation' is tomorrow so i'm all over the place AHHHHH
#... AND fellowship number 2 starts in literally 12 days WHY DONT I HAVE MY SCHEDULE YET#i really REALLY wanted to finish the path to paradise by end of june but honestly i dont think that's happening#the most batshit thing i did on monday is cover for a shift at hospital A from 8am-6pm then cover a shift at hospital B from 8pm to 7am.#and they were both INSANELY busy#the first is just a consult shift so it wasn't too bad#but the second is my icu community shift and GOD#this person coded at 2am and i probably didn't leave her side until at least 5 am#its just INSANE. INSANE that i didn't get called before she coded#like i think the reason all my codes at this hospital get ROSC is because these people would NEVER have coded at the academic one#and this is FAR from the first time this has happened#you. you let this woman. sit on the floor. with BPs in the 70s. for HOW long? you left this OTHER woman completely obtunded on a bipap?!?!?#for DAYS?!?!??!?! WITHOUT TALKING TO THE ICU?! AND ONLY CALLED WHEN THEY GOT HYPOTENSIVE?!#this is horrifying. like legitimately. must be nice to practice shit medicine and when your patient crashes just wipe your hands and let#the icu doc deal with the fallout#i realize i signed up for this#but it always feels crappy when i can't tell families 'yeah no the reason your loved one is dying is probably because they were mismanaged'#and i'm gonna keep it real with you chief. its the racism too#hospital A is in the rich part of the city#hospital B is close to the border with mexico#less densely populated/less desirable areas hire less desirable doctors (all staff really)#its often like 30% people who care about the community#and 70% of people who can't get jobs elsewhere#and the economic disparity even between branches of the SAME HOSPITAL SYSTEM is staggering#healthcare in america is a fucking joke#also. like.#in rich person hospital A monday#got a consult for this guy who is a 'medical mystery'#seen at a bunch of different hospitals by a lot of different doctors#...and i'm 90% sure the way he got his lung disease is by crushing up pain and/or anxiety meds and injecting them#but see the reason no one suspects this. is because he's a wealthy white man
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fauxfroot · 4 months
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how to explain to my mother that i don't want to make any stops before my dr appointment tomorrow bc i don't in fact trust her to get me there on time if we stop anywhere
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wholemleko · 1 year
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Out here 2 vent again sry
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albtrosz · 8 months
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#one of the most annoying parts of having bpd isn’t even part of the bpd itself but it's the stigma#and don’t get me wrong this shit is FUCKING HELL and very hard and embarrassing#but the way people think bpd is somehow the same thing as sociopathy or psychopathy is just like ??????????????#and the way even doctors are so sensationalist about it and it does affect your overall hope for how you're gonna be able to#idk navigate life with it. because they make it look like someone who has bpd#is just the worst most difficult and awful human being on earth#like everyone else isn't difficult everyone else doesn't struggle w emotions or relationships or abandonment#and the way they approach it truly makes you feel like you're damaged for life and you're broken and you're doomed#i could go on and on about how this is just upsetting and like sometimes when people learn that i have bpd they're surprised#because i keep a lot of things and feelings to myself because i don't want to be the stereotype#i'm venting but what i mean is that i think the stigma around bpd just makes everything harder#for instance i feel the need to be centred because otherwise i'll be perceived as a bpd stereotype#so i can't get angry i can't get upset i can't get sad i can't miss someone i can't need someone#i can't fear not having someone in my life anymore i can't fear being alone and so on#i have to be manageable and cool and nonchalant and complaisant all the time#sometimes i feel like i'm not allowed to be a person BECAUSE i have bpd#but yeah i'm yet to learn to not give a shit about how people perceive me but there are days that this is harder than others
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