#They can cry me a river but I've meet my objective and now it's time for my next step: working in the videogame industry

[momochiiee-reblogs]

Managers at work are playing a game of calling me earlier each Friday when I told them once and again that at most I can be called at 6pm and by all means it can't be an habit as I am usually busy with other stuff up until 6 pm, which means, I'm setting aside other important matters to go and assist them earlier than usual

They can do whatever they want with the schedules and edit it as much as they want, I've warned them about my availability on Fridays due to studying and working on my personal project that will become my main job soon enough

If they choose to ignore it, they'll just going to get one less employee than usual

And mind you, as winter is approaching, so is my personal deadline to quit working for them. They were a means to speed up my savings for the top surgery, and now, as I am still recovering and in pain, big amounts of stress and physical labor aren't good for me, so I will save up the paychecks of the last 3 months of the year, and announce I'm leaving them for good

They don't need to know I won't be having another job, but heck I'll tell them I did get a new one regardless if it's true or not when the time comes

Their insane schedules are diminishing my mental and physical health, and I paid big cash to have my body tweaked. I'm not ruining it for them because they can't understand I am still limited in terms of strength and stress endurance

I've been breathless and in pain too many times in the month and a half I've been back working with them, so

Winter is coming and Dilan is fucking leaving

[macescumdrenchedhusband]

Journal Entry 1 April 11 2012

It’s the dead of night as of when I am writing this, the burn still stings when I brush my hand up against the scarred flesh, thinking of the incident makes me want to vomit or pass out. The pain of the molten plastic burning my face and the nauseous smell it left behind was enough to make me pass out only to wake up in a hospital with needles and tubes connected to my body. I suppose having half my damn face burnt was a danger zone for how it went over my eye. I've been having trouble with seeing out of my left eye but I can make out objects and sometimes faces, if the person is still enough. I’ve been biding my time in my bedroom occasionally getting something to eat if necessary, Ada has been stopping by pissing me off with her damned questions “how are you feeling?” or “you need to eat more” it’s all bs and I know it. I barely remember what happened that day. It all just happened so fast that my brain couldn’t comprehend what was happening to me. I'm going back to work tomorrow so I suppose I should get some sleep.

Journal Entry 2 April 12 2012

Today was very hellish with the way it went, no one ever sees me because I work in the actual garage but seeing what I was doing was very hard to do, luckily I didn’t mess up on someones ‘precious GMC truck’ that’d be a bitch to deal with. Some of the fake assholes at work had questions on what happened and gave me false sympathy. And the snarky remarks continue “well now you look like a real nazi.” God, I’ve heard that so much when I first moved here from Deutschland to Amerika, the whole reason my family moved was for work, Ada fit in because she forgot who she truly was hell she never speaks our language! She was never made fun of because she fit in, she dyed her hair, she wore normal clothes, she joined cheer. And I grew my hair out and dressed in Nintendo or band t’s and joined robotics. Me and Ada never got along and I’m sick of hearing “she’s your sister, you should love and respect her” I have never loved a person. I have never cared for a person. I tolerate others, but that will not stop me from wanting to kill every fucking thing talks to me. I just wish to remove the virus of this world, humans, the stupidity of these creatures kills me slowly. Very painfully and slowly.

Journal Entry 3 April 15th 2012

I remember that one valentines day junior year. Bethany Smithon, she was an interesting girl, popular, friends with Ada, rich, and so damn annoying. Bethany had come over for sleepovers for Ada and she would bother me with annoying fucking questions when she did so. But it turns out she just liked me, so she asked me out that February the 14th and I said no, obviously. Bethany had been my first and only kill, her body was dropped into the river and to be found with her flesh deteriorating and slit throat, I remember what I said to her before slitting her throat with my pocket knife “love does not exist, it’s a made up factor to make you feel better about your pathetic self to compensate what you didn’t receive growing up.” She ended up crying of course which annoyed me more so I killed her. I'm aware most people would find that horrible but I removed one person from the factor of this world. Police never thought to question me, they ruled it out as a suicide but could never find the knife so they believed it sank to the bottom when I had it the whole time. Good times that year..

Journal Entry 4 April 17th 2012

I’m writing these at random for a reason, work and I don’t need to write as much. I fixed up my 1969 camaro I’ve been meaning to fix up, it still needs a repaint but it drives and that’s all I care for at the moment. Most of the richies aren’t a big fan of it but I don’t care. It’s a thing of mine I picked up from my dad, he could work on cars so I learned, Ada was never as fascinated as me. She focused on useless things like meeting people and liking people. As for me, I stayed in my room designing shit and being a pointless honor roll student with the best grades. It was all pointless, “you’ll go to a good college and become well known.” I work in a garage fixing cars for a living. The whole point of the bs was you’d feel “special” it made no sense and it still doesn’t. I was more superior to my sister in every way possible, she is nothing but a weak bitch that should just die already, wait…

Journal Entry 5 April 18th 2012

I did it, I actually did it. The headaches have stopped, I feel right once more. No one to bother me anymore, there’s still more I can do. My hands are covered in her blood as I write this, hell the blood is running down the pen to paper, it’s all over. I’m hiding in my car that’s right outside her house, I’ll be heading somewhere soon I don’t know where though. But Ada Keller is finally dead. I’m sure her wife will call the cops when she gets home but I don’t care, I’ve never cared. This is what I’m meant to do. Kill the living, humans are the reason for EVERYTHING, as they fight for things they caused. Ada and Bethany were just the start, it all will soon make sense in time of my plans..