#There are so many albums that I love dearly it's hard to choose | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

defdaily · 4 years ago

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KNIGHT Magazine March 2021 Issue featuring JAY B

Translated by defdaily

JAY B: Back to the starting point, to set off again

At first sight, Jay B does not seem to have the looks of a popular “Flower Boy”; he has single eyelids typical in Korean boys, and the corners of his eyes crescent up with warmth and pureness as he smiles, drawing people close to him. “Sexy”, “Steady”, “Introverted”，“Warm”，“Sharp” and “Domineering” are all words fans use to describe him. These seemingly unrelated characteristics come together in Jay B and sparks a charisma that is unique to him.

9 years on since debut, he is an all-rounder who sings, dances and composes and his vibrant abilities are obvious to all. However, the entertainment industry is a place that is never short of talent and worthy competitors. Being GOT7’s leader and facing the responsibilities and stress, he did not go down an easy path. Through the endurance, he figured out his own direction of growth and pace - one that is neither nervous or rushed but instead calm and steady. The start of 2021 ushered in the end of his artistic contract and signing new companies, but that did not affect his pace; he made a comeback with his members, writing songs and preparing for his solo album, continuing to do what he is good at, facing the odds calmly and confidently, “2021 to me is a brand new start; I will return to the starting point and start anew.”

Embracing the essence, upholding greatness

Looking through Jay B’s portfolio, he went through many profile changes in the early years. From being an aspiring B-boy, to debuting as an actor, as a boy group duo JJ Project, and 2 years later debuting as GOT7 leader. At every stage, he did his best in whatever he wanted to do. Grabbing every opportunity and going forward earnestly. For dance, he once gave up on his studies and joined a professional dance group very early on. After debuting as a leader, in order to shoulder the responsibilities, he reigned in on his youthful flippance and impetuousness and learned to be tolerant. Through several details, he is managing well. When appearing on variety shows as a group, he made efforts to ensure that every member had the chance to showcase their talents. Before showcases, he is obviously nervous himself but would never forget to remind the others to drink up. He even prioritized group activities over his own, concertedly rejecting solo activities arranged by the company. Till date, he is still the one with the least solo activities. “Instead of myself, it would be better for the other members to begin their solo activities first.”

He is clear-cut and is never trapped between choosing one thing over the other. As a trainee, he also experienced a rebellious phase where he wanted to give up. When he did not know what he wanted, he would follow his heart. He once wrote on SNS “Do whatever you want. If you really love something, then follow your heart and do it.” His motivation sets him on a simple path; start off with love, and put in all his effort into it, working hard to hand in his best submission. He assigned the name Def. to his solo writing, which holds the meaning of “the best, the greatest of all”. Years ago, he had said in a variety show, “When I grow a little older, I must become a truly cool celebrity, and a multi-talented artist.” At that time, when faced with many fresh opportunities, he eagerly leapt forward to try them out, to bloom from all corners. Later, interviewers asked him what his future plans are for the next 5 years, and he said, “Definitely to continue my music-related work, and if my body allows me to, I will continue dancing.” And now, his dreams have more definitively settled on the area of creative music composing, hence, when asked whether he would consider moving into acting again, he said, “Now I can’t fully embody and express a character, but I think I should learn and understand deeply before going into acting. Learning to have restraint and storing one’s potential will help with a better start.

I will open up my heart

Some say the creative must embrace change at all times and maintain a keenness for observation; similarly, Jay B’s awareness of the world is astute and meticulous. He observes life through film lenses, and reflects upon his own feelings in the process. “Through the photos I take, I discovered that my photos are people-centric, and I often am curious about what they are thinking, how they are feeling at that very moment.” The happiness and sorrows of people often differ from one another, but they always leave marks. He likes to record down his surroundings, the people around him and the banalities of everyday life, and incorporate them into his creative works. For example, when writing the song “Rainy”, he laid out photos that he took on a rainy day on the floor of his studio, began arranging and rearranging them, and pondering over the sequences. Thus led to the birth of a rainy love story.

Whether it is on stage or composing music, the ever-changing styles he expresses are undoubtedly based on thoughts and experiences in life. In addition to photography, reading books, watching movies and having conversations with people who have experienced life are all some ways in which he draws inspiration from. “In the future I would like to ponder over everything that I experience genuinely in my life, and describe my true thoughts and feelings. It may not necessarily have to be positive; sometimes it can also be a form of relief by expressing the negativity in a straightforward manner.”

Having been in the spotlight of the entertainment industry for many years, he is no stranger to receiving criticisms, yet he always digests it quietly. His warm, honest aura, along with his sensitivity and sympathetic nature, creates a juxtaposition in his personality. On the performing stage, he is cool and powerful, as if he has an unlimited source energy waiting to be released. In everyday life, the same Jay B he stores that energy and softens up, creating an entirely different image. He is used to treating others with kindness, and knows how to live as himself: “Instead of paying attention to the criticism and living like someone else, I would rather be myself and accept the criticism.” He loves life, and likes to play with his three cats. He remembers a funny incident, “One of my cats likes to lick the carpet, so there was one time I accidentally stepped on the carpet and almost fell.” Like many young folks, during his leisure time, he reads and sleeps to relieve stress. When his schedule is packed, he would take a stroll at the working site, sometimes taking photos and videos and sharing them along the way. He has his own world, but it is not locked up at all; it is wide open and welcome for everyone to visit. There was once where he read a word in a book that reminded him of b-boying, so he simply left the house and b-boyed along the streets, posting a clip of it on SNS. He thinks that the name that Chinese fans call themselves sounds nice, but he also likes calling everyone “best friend”. Realizing he might sound impolite, he carefully added that it does not mean he does not like the former, just like an old friend with no filter who says what they want but never fails to consider your feelings.

Tackling the unknown is full of delight

“Unknown challenges, to me, are very interesting. I find tackling new things to be a really great thing.” In this new year, with a new company and new plans, Lim Jaebeom has started on his journey of transformation. Taking on a path that he has to take alone, even though he may still be adapting to this new identity and role, “I am really alone now, it feels fascinating yet a little awkward.” He understands to cherish, and wishes to continue making even greater music for the group. He also looks forward dearly for his music to find a place of its own in the music sphere. Being faced with the challenges that await him, he is eager to create a world of his own. At a certain program where he was asked by his members, “Are you happy?”, he hesitated and replied: “I don’t know.” In fact, he is just like the music that he writes - it does not shock or excite but you will never get bored of it after repeated listens; the kind of music he pursues is not one with intricate formal design or various showy techniques, but one that expresses of real and honest emotions triggered by real and honest events.

As he faces the ebb and flow of the tide calmly and inches closer to his dreams with each step, he is still the young boy he was before, fiery passion in his gaze, sincerely embracing change, maturing and growing through it. Perhaps he might not know when his personal happiness will arrive, but he has never stopped looking for it. For his era is imminent.

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princessjungeun · 5 years ago

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Hey: Kim Lip x Reader

You’ve been standing in front of your closet for the past 30 minutes trying to pick out an outfit. On one hand you want to choose something random and go, but on the other, you want to look good...really good.

This isn’t the first time you’ve been to a Loona fan event. This also isn’t the first time you’ve interacted with the girls. You’ve been supporting since Heejin made her debut. As the other girls debuted, you fell in love with the group even more...especially one girl in particular.

Kim Jungeun, otherwise known as Kim Lip. She was without a doubt your ultimate bias. Ever since she debuted you’ve been head over heels in love with her. Everything from her debut song to her vocals, and god tier visuals. You loved it all.

When you first saw her you remember the unexplainable feeling of happiness and nervousness. Usually you weren’t one to get nervous, with her other members you were extremely calm. However seeing Jungeun felt different.

Sitting among many other fansites and fans you watched the stage darken as it was about to begin. Red lights flashed on illuminating the stage, a figure laying in the middle. You held your breath waiting for the music to cue and lights to brighten. When they did low and behold, Kim Jungeun was right before your eyes.

The sound of fans around you almost drowned out her voice. You watched in awe as the lyrics fell from her lips like honey. The way her body moved so smoothly to the beat of the music. You spent so much time entranced watching her that you forgot to record. When you regained control of yourself you reached into your pocket to grab your phone, hopefully you could at least get the ending. Right as you opened you camera a fan next to you screamed loudly. Looking up you noticed not only was Jungeun walking closer to your section of the audience, her eyes were also locked on you.

Feeling your cheeks heat up, you watched as she sang the last lyrics. Although she’d walked back to the center of the stage, her eyes remained on you.

“눈을 떼기 힘드니, 계속 함께 해줄래, 잊지 못할 Eclipse”

“It’s hard to take your eyes off, will you stay with me, unforgettable Eclipse”

The song ended and the stage went black. Screams erupted from the people around you however you were still in a state of shock.

•

Since then you’ve seen Jungeun multiple times live, as well as her other members. You even became a fansite for Jungeun. Your mother had always encouraged you to pursue photography but you never truly found something you wanted to take photos of. Until you learned more about being a fansite, you realized that’s what you wanted to do.

Within the fansite community you were fairly well known as you were Jungeun’s first fansite. That as well as they also noticed the change in dynamic between you two and the way she was with other fansites. Many assumed you knew Jungeun before she debuted, although that was false you both never cornfirmed or denied anything.

Today was another fansign and you were attending. Due to other things, you hadn’t seen the girls in months. You’d been on a hiatus with your fansite and finally you were able to come back to it. You missed the girls dearly and now it was finally the day when you were able to see them again.

“Y/N! If you’re still going to that little concert, you need to leave within the next 10 minutes or you’ll miss the bus! Plus it’s hot so dress accordingly!” Your mom called to you from another room. Settling on a pair of random shorts and a t shirt you looked yourself over in the mirror. Humming to yourself you said “hmmm something’s missing.” Your eyes wandered around your room, falling on the rainbow pin your mom gave you when you came out to her. Quickly you put it on the pocket of your shorts before running out with your camera bag.

When you arrived at the venue you texted your mom to let her know you got there safely. You greeted a few of your friends who were fansites and sat around by them. Not having seen them in a while you caught up with them while waiting for the girls to join onstage.

Minutes passed before the 11 girls made their way onto the stage. Immediately you and every fansite around you started snapping photos, shutter clicks echoing through the room. Unlike most times, you actually had an album for the girls to sign, so you were not only here as a fansite, but also a fan.

After the girls greeted you they found their seats and the event started. You watched Jungeun through the lens of your camera, trying to get the perfect shot. Her eyes scanned the room, looking over everyone’s face, disappointment starting to wash over. You knew what she wanted so you lowered your camera from your face. Her eyes locked on yours and you flashed her your signature smile.

Jungeun looked down trying to hide her blushing face as you laughed softly snapping a few pictures. The girl next to you, a friend of yours who was a Vivi fansite, whispered “she’s been looking for you since you went MIA, talk about whipped.” You told her “Vivi does that when you’re not here.” She lowly replied “ok but Kahei doesnt stare at my ass when I walk away.” You elbowed her in the side earning a whine and a playful slap to the arm.

You snapped picture after picture until it was time for you to actually go up to get your album signed.

When each of the girls saw you the first thing they said was “Y/N!” You loved that you were on a first name basis with all of them, especially Heejin since technically she’s known you the longest.

When you got to Jungeun as the end of the table she was already smiling. You enjoyed your interactions with her the most. She usually flirted heavily with you turning you into a flustered and blushing mess. However, today she was the one who was blushing and you hadn’t even gone up to her yet.

Sitting down in front of her, you slid the album over. You spoke first “hi beautiful.” A smile ghosted her lips but disappeared as she asked “where’ve you been...it’s been so long?” You responded “a lot actually, some good some bad. But i’m here now arent I?” She hummed “mmmhmm.” You smirked and said “I couldn’t handle being away from your beautiful face any longer.” She looked up trying to hide her embarrassed smile.

She asked you “why do you look so different now? It’s in a good way...but what’s different?” You told her “I think grew a few centimeters...how tall are you again?” Jungeun responded “5’3 why?” You told her “hmm i thought you were 1’ *insert you phone number*”

The look on her face was priceless, she couldn’t help but laugh. She asked you “did you just say your phone number?” You stood up as your time with her was now up. Quietly you said to her “text it and you’ll find out...bye Jungeun” making sure to wink as you walked away.

When you found your seat your friend leaned over and asked “what did you say to her? She red as a tomato!” You laughed and shrugged your shoulders “all I said was she was pretty.”

•

The fansign ended hours ago and you were going through your pictures. As you uploaded them onto your computer for editing, you felt your phone buzz next to you. Upon reading the notification your lungs and heart almost simultaneously stopped working

Unknown number: hey...it’s Jungeun

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bobbystompy · 4 years ago

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My Top 88 Songs Of 2020

Previously: 2019, 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011

Though we couldn’t get as trim as last year’s 75, still very happy to keep this under 100 for the second year in a row. This was a very difficult year in many ways, but music helped make it more bearable.

As always, criteria and info:

This is a list of what I personally like, not ones I’m saying are the “best” from the year; more subjective than objective

No artist is featured more than once

If it comes down to choosing between two songs, I try to give more weight to a single or featured track

Each song on the list is linked in the title if you wanna check them out for yourself; there is also a Spotify playlist at the bottom that includes the majority of the songs

Usually a pump up video goes here, but 2020 had a different energy, so Michael, take us in.

88) Katy Perry - “Smile”

Even Katy Perry’s good songs are a swirling spiral of maxed out auto-tune. This one is just fine. It’s... fine.

87) All Time Low - “Trouble Is...”

Is All Time Low the Katy Perry of pop punk?

86) Tee Grizzley f/ Payroll Giovanni - “Payroll”

I have never heard of Payroll Giovanni, but I have two questions:

1) Is this his song, and he got Tee to jump on it?

2) Or, did Tee write a song called “Payroll” and think to himself “You know who would be great on this? Payroll Giovanni!”

Favorite stretch:

Listen, we is not the same, you say "door", I say "dough" You say "floor", I say "flow", you say "for sure", I say "fa'sho"

85) Lady Gaga & Ariana Grande - “Rain On Me”

Coming out in 2020 probably hurt this song, because I have no, like, out of the house memories with it. You can only have so much fun with Big Singers Singing over a pulsing beat when it’s coming from the phone in your kitchen as you’re indifferently scrambling eggs.

84) Benjamin Gibbard - “Life In Quarantine”

Now this is a song you can do nothing to; almost feels like it’s reluctant to even exist. It got released in March of 2020, so the outro (“No one is going anywhere soon”) served as a too sad reminder/mantra for what the year was about to be. Second shout out to Gibbard for the many YouTube sets he put together during the early stages of the pandemic (when so many of his peers were trying to figure out the next move).

83) Cardi B f/ Megan Thee Stallion - “WAP”

This felt less like a song and more of a “whoa, did you see the music video?!” and/or a means to relitigate the eternal question “What is the sexual line in music?” And while it was fun to watch people freak the fuck out... the quality itself really needed to be better.

(Note: YouTube video is the edited chorus; explicit version here)

82) McKayla Maroney - “Wake Up Call”

Former Olympic gymnast McKayla Maroney -- of medals and memes fame -- dips her toe into the music waters. It’s inside-the-box modern pop music. One thing that’s hard to escape: it doesn’t really sound like her.

81) Chelsea Cutler - “Sad Tonight”

He vocals really remind me of Alessia Cara.

80) blink-182 - “Quarantine”

Blink doing a Bad Religion impression. Docked a few points for the very weak chorus lyrics (“Quarantine, fuck this disease”). That said, as serious as the song comes off, there are some clever punchlines to be found.

79) Dave Hause & Brian Fallon - “Long Ride Home”

This is kind of a nothing song, but it’s easy listening. Also, if your guitar leads can’t clear the “Could Bobby have written or performed this?” bar, then said leads are probably pretty weak.

78) Travis Scott & Kid Cudi - “THE SCOTTS”

Two artists who pair so well together, it’s hard to tell who exudes more influence on the track (eh, that’s not true, it’s Travis Scott, but Kid Cudi is more of a roommate than guest). They want you to be high by the time the instrumental outro hits.

77) The Strokes - “Bad Decisions”

The beginning sound feels somewhat evolved, but by the time Julian Casablancas croons “Making bad decisions”, the song feels like it could be on their debut album “Is This It?”. And it goes in and out like that from there.

76) Thundercat - “Dragonball Durag”

Thundercat is one of those artists I wish I liked more, but when the occasional track does hit, it’s a momentary glimpse into what real fans seem to always see.

75) TI f/ Lil Baby - “Pardon”

Standard fare. Lil Baby’s cameo is very meh.

74) Porches - “Do U Wanna”

For a song that repeatedly asks “Do you want to dance?”, it sure makes you feel like you’re moving in slow motion.

73) NOFX - “Thatcher Fucked The Kids”

On the best-named album of the year (“West Coast vs. Wessex”), Frank Turner and NOFX cover each other’s material. To start us off, the legends take a song from 12 years ago about British politics from 40 years ago and, well, very easily apply it to right god damn now in America.

72) The Bombpops - “Dearly Departed”

Ahh, my year’s first cancelled concert. The listed names in V1 always make me want to skip this song -- but patience, grasshopper. Chorus is aight.

71) Ratboys - “Alien With A Sleep Mask On”

This band name will never match what the music sounds like.

70) Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever - “She’s There”

The vocals in this song channel, like, four completely different singers for me, ranging from Bob Dylan to Cloud Nothings.

69) NOBRO - “Don’t Die”

An anthemic chorus meant to be belted in a room with sweaty strangers.

68) Oliver Tree f/ blink-182 - “Let Me Down”

The original solo version of this song is 1:52, and though the blink cameo pushes it over the dreaded two minute mark, it adds enough diversity to justify the choice (keep an eye out for the quick Green Day lyrical nod in the back half).

67) AJJ - “Normalization Blues”

This dropped in January, and if you thought the year was bad then. Punk News:

I'll admit I do want the album to age badly because I really don't want to have to listen to it years later and still say this is the world we're living in.

Said album being titled “Good Luck Everybody” is straight cryptic.

66) Selena Gomez - “Rare”

Very chill for big pop; triplet rhythm singing in the chorus gets me erry time.

65) Kid Cudi & Eminem - “The Adventures Of Moon Man & Slim Shady”

Cudi’s second split collab yields bigger results than his Travis Scott joint (admittedly with a worse beat here). It rarely ever hurts to let Eminem do the heavy lifting.

64) Alkaline Trio - “Smokestack”

A little cheerier than the average Alk3 song, but Dan Andriano seems like he’s been in a great place for a long time now; confident and in control. For me, the whole song builds up to the “You changed my life” chorus.

63) Frank Turner - “Scavenger Type”

Here, Frank takes on the acoustic closer to NOFX’s legendary 1994 album “Punk In Drublic”. Though the energy boost is most noticeable, my favorite part is how you can hear how much Turner loves this song as his melody bursts on the verses.

62) Mike Posner - “Alone In A Mansion”

Mike Posner, an artist I have a very soft spot for, released a storytelling concept album in 2020. From the intro track:

This album was written, recorded, and produced over a period of two weeks in Detroit, Michigan in my parents' basement. It's meant to be listened to all the way through. At least on the first listen. And it's about 36 minutes long. If you can't devote 36 minutes of undivided attention to this album, I again politely ask that you turn it off and return at a later time. I love you and I thank you for taking the time to listen in the first place. Also, it's important to note that the characters and the stories in this album are completely fictional. In addition, anyone struggling with a mental illness - depression, schizophrenia - should not listen to this album. Turn it off.

So those are the stakes. Pulling this song -- the record’s closer -- feels unfair void of context, but them’s the breaks.

61) Nada Surf - “Just Wait”

Heavy hitting chorus without having to be heavy; this could really work in a movie.

60) Matt Pond PA - “Wild Heart”

This having only 805 views on YouTube is criminal.

59) Liquid Death - “Unnecessary And Unimpressive”

Liquid Death -- in this iteration -- is a punk rock supergroup with members of Rise Against, Anti-Flag, The Lawrence Arms, and The Bombpops. If that didn’t interest you enough, all lyrics in the project (which, I believe, is for charity) come from hateful comments or negative reviews. Of the four artists involved, this sounds most like a Bombpops song, with Jen on lead vocals as others chime in.

58) PUP - “Rot”

Off my silver medalist for album name of the year (“This Place Sucks Ass”), PUP doesn’t do anything new here, but it was relieving to see them still going in 2020 when so many others got roadblocked, both physically and creatively.

57) Paul Harrold and the Nuclear Bandits - “Massanutten”

This reminds me of local Chicago artist Al Scorch. So much earnestness in the vocals, but a little more prairie for Harrold compared to speakeasy for Scorch. This would be a good road trip song. And I’m not talking about singalong... more for the stretch where you want to sit in silence and look out at the sun-kissed land blazing by. The song’s greatest victory is getting me to like something that cracks 6:00.

Note to future me: Massanutten is in Virginia (saved you a Google).

56) Kesha f/ Sturgill Simpson, Brian Wilson & Wrabel - “Resentment”

Kesha has been vulnerable in the past but never this stripped down sonically; the chorus would feel right at home on a country radio station. Love a good bridge, too.

55) Megan Thee Stallion f/ Beyoncé - “Savage (Remix)”

An up-and-comer pairing with a legend rarely lets down when both sides are this locked in. Bey wins. Fav line: “If you don't jump to put jeans on, baby, you don't feel my pain”.

She matches flows with Megan but also brings melody. Her blessing takes this song from pretty damn good to undeniably great.

That beat, too.

54) Red City Radio - “Baby Of The Year”

If all you want to do right now is grab a drink in a bar, here is a video built to troll.

(Also: a Liquid Death cameo?!)

53) Nathaniel Rateliff - “And It’s Still Alright”

The last time Mr. Rateliff had our attention, he just wanted a drink. That hit had a chorus with the very-sad-when-removed-from-the-song “If I can't get clean, I'm gonna drink my life away” lyric. Well, our man got sober since. And when the party is over, the introspection comes.

52) Direct Hit! - “HAVE YOU SEEN IT?”

Listening to slowed down Direct Hit! is like watching Usain Bolt lightly jog. It kinda makes sense because the core action is there, but it also feels sort of incorrect.

51) Hayley Williams - “Dead Horse”

Solo Hayley songs have this feel like they could do anything at any time... but then don’t. This one does the same until a very fun chorus breaks it up.

50) Kid Cudi f/ Phoebe Bridgers - “Lovin’ Me”

Probably the most improbable collab on this list (if 2020 hadn’t repeatedly taught us to not be surprised by anything).

49) The Homeless Gospel Choir - “Don’t Compare”

Listening to The Homeless Gospel Choir is kind of like getting a dedicated pep talk from a good friend... while fire rains down from the sky.

48) Carly Rae Jepsen - “Let’s Sort The Whole Thing Out”

Queen vocals with one prince of a tempo; this chorus is Sour Patch Kids riding Twix logs down a soda pop waterfall -- and it’s a b-side.

47) Green Day - “Meet Me On The Roof”

I like this song because it reminds me of summer and because it doesn’t really sound like Green Day (but still totally does).

46) Broadway Calls - “Meet Me On The Moon”

Promise -- swear -- I was gonna compare this Broadway Calls song to Green Day before realizing they both had titles about meeting in an escalated location. That said, I did put them next together on purpose to more coherently make this point.

45) David Rokos - “Building Bridges”

My buddy Dave wrote this song, and I think I’ve asked him three times what “burning sugar” meant (he says it’s a reference to absinthe). This song will make you want to travel to enjoy not only the places but the people around you.

44) Charli XCX - “claws”

Charli XCX keeps it futuristic in a video that could be described as sexy, cheesy, goofy, and playful-yet-serious.

43) Brian Fallon - “Lonely For You Only”

This is too easy and should not work (and maybe doesn’t). But that chorus... that circular phrasing... it still takes me all the way out. But I’m the same cat who proposed while a Gaslight Anthem cover was playing.

42) Waxahatchee - “Fire”

This song could be in a different language and hit just as hard.

41) Harry Styles - “Adore You”

Purifying pop.

40) Local H - “Hold That Thought”

Hardest rock song thus far. Local H was one of the first artists to play “live” once the lockdown hit (on a simultaneous YouTube/Facebook stream), and watching them attack music in their Chicago practice bunker felt a little bit like taking in the end of the world. New songs, old songs, covers -- it didn’t matter; their cool, unmatched apathy fits a pandemic or peacetime.

Ironically, was able to see them live in 2020, as they played a socially distanced, outdoor drive up concert in a minor league baseball parking lot. It wasn’t the same, but it was still something.

39) Crazy & The Brains - “I Don’t Deliver Pizza Anymore”

This song is just cool*. The verses feel tense and crucial, it starts to unspool in the pre-chorus, and the chorus itself feels like a light comedown more than anything else.

(* - though the lyric video is docked some points for spelling y’all as “ya’ll”)

38) Drake f/ Fivio Foreign & Sosa Geek - “Demons”

Menacing Drizzy can be very fun from time to time. Also more than happy to keep “Toosie Slide” very far away from this list.

37) Hey Dad!!! - “Life’s Alright”

Small band, big song; though summer feels light-years away.

36) insignificant other - “i’m so glad i feel this way about you”

This song lands a big haymaker in the first few seconds, so it was probably a good call to pull back some for the chorus and, eventually, outro.

35) BTS - “Dynamite”

Heard they made the lyrics bad on purpose for their English hit, which makes sense, because they’re bad. That said, if you listen knowing they’re supposed to be bad, it kinda makes them... good? Listen, 771 million views would have me singing nursery rhymes in Pig Latin.

34) DaBaby f/ RODDY RICCH - “ROCKSTAR”

Someone said this could be the song of the summer, but, because there wasn’t really a summer, I feel like I only heard it once all year. Also, are we really pretending Post Malone* didn’t just do a “like a rockstar” song three years ago?

(* - and N.E.R.D. before that and Cypress Hill before that... though N.E.R.D. only waiting a year after Cypress, so maybe DaBaby actually was patient)

33) The Front Bottoms - “the hard way”

Don’t take it easy on the animal / I am the animal

Not quite sure what this line means, but I fixate on the phrasing every single time. This song sounds resigned in a very self-aware way.

32) The 1975 - “If You’re Too Shy (Let Me Know)”

For a band called The 1975, they sure sound like they’re on their ‘80s shit here. Also, a real thing that happened:

Me: Is he coercing her to get naked?! I thought this band was woke.

/scans lyrics

/notices “She said” before the “Maybe I would like you better if you took off your clothes” line

Me: Ahh.

Sax solo, take us out.

31) Charly Bliss & PUP - “It’s Christmas And I Fucking Miss You”

A song that is already a forever staple on all my future Xmas playlists.

30) 2 Chainz f/ Ty Dolla $ign & Lil Duval - “Can’t Go For That”

Shorty said she love me / I said “I love me back”

This is a real genre blur; rap at its core, but also soulful, funky, and very danceable. Damn creative.

29) Billie Eilish - “Therefore I Am”

Billie's 2020 gave a few singles -- but no new album -- and a body shaming scandal where the backlash to the backlash probably caused more headlines than the tweet that started it all. Still, she stays on cruise control above the clouds; can all eyes be on you if they can’t even make you out?

Video for this is fun, too. Not sure if her running amok in an empty mall is more of a COVID necessity or commentary on the dying retail industry. As always with her, fill in your own blanks for now.

28) Future f/ Drake - “Life Is Good”

This was my most listened to rap song in the first half of the year, and bumping again now, almost forgot how good it is. Drake just chasing one-liner Instagram captions in the first half:

- “Haven’t done my taxes, I’m too turnt up”

- “N****s caught me slipping once, OK, so what?”

- “B****, this is fame not clout, I don’t even know what that’s about”

And, of course, “Workin’ on the weekend like usual”. The man could make anything glamorous. Let’s hit that H&R Block, bro!

Future’s back half is a totally different song and feels mostly like noise, but the vibe is cool, so I don’t even totally mean that in a bad way. You can even make out a “Got Promethazine in my blood and Percocet” lyric to mark your Future bingo card and immediately move on.

27) I’m Glad It’s You - “The Silver Cord”

This song feels like cold air blowing on the back of your neck.

(Sidebar: thought this band was called The Silver Cord until literally right now)

26) The Spill Canvas - “Mercy”

A dreamy, distorted, at-home version of whatever you remember The Spill Canvas sounding like. This song is confessional and at peace, with the Grade A self-loathing we’ve come to love from this band.

25) 100 gecs f/ Charli XCX, Rico Nasty & Kero Kero Bonito - “ringtone (remix)”

100 gecs first hit my radar with the explosively obnoxious “money machine”, but that’s a 2019er, so this remix to “ringtone” will have to do. It’s catchy like a younger sibling persistently singing a song you’re sick of hearing*.

(* - /only child trying to work in sibling analogies)

24) iann dior f/ Machine Gun Kelly & Travis Barker - “Sick And Tired”

Iann Dior -- ...yeah -- channels Juice WRLD on the hook, and MGK/Travis Barker buoy a track that, honestly, doesn’t really even need the help.

23) Nick Lutsko - “Unleash Your Spirit”

Lutsko hit my radar on Twitter with some legendary political anthems (word to the RNC and Dan Bongino + his Dashboard Trump parody). “Unleash Your Spirit” is the song I most fear hearing (or even thinking of) within a few minutes of going to bed. Not because it’s Halloween theme is scary -- because it’s that god damn catchy. It permeates your brain. True story: a week ago, I woke up in the middle of the night with “Bobbing for apples with the boys” so ingrained in my head, it felt like someone was standing there yelling it through a megaphone.

22) Dogleg - “Kawasaki Backflip”

Bad 2020 robbed many concerts from us, and not getting to see this band live might take the cake. I end the year liking them but could have been *all in* with the right performance and the right venue. Also, Song Title of the Year until further notice.

21) Eminem f/ Juice WRLD - “Godzilla”

Eminem has all of the words and all of the lyrical dexterity, but sometimes it feels like there isn’t anything to ground him. Enter: one of the best beats he’s ever spit on and a Juice WRLD hook to give it pop angle. But let’s not put Slim in the corner -- when he starts accelerating at the end, it’s is a true “holy fuck” moment. It sounds faster than if you actually fast forwarded.

The video ends with a touching audio message from Juice WRLD.

20) Soccer Mommy - “circle the drain”

This song is so gloriously ‘90s; it leans in and does not care.

19) Sam Russo - “Always Lost”

The first time I met you, we were on the last bus You passed me a bottle, and I knew you were one of us

Took 25 words to hook me; I was txting friends before the first chorus even hit.

18) Sincere Engineer - “Trust Me”

Deanna Belos pushes her vocals in this one. I asked about the performance, and she said it was one of the first ones they recorded in the studio, but when they were done and listening back to everything, she re-did this track because her throat was much more used to what the song required.

“That’s why it sounds like I’m on roids lol,” she added.

17) Jay Electronica f/ JAY-Z - “Flux Capacitor”

Jay Electronica signed to Roc Nation in November of 2010. At of the start of 2020, he had still -- STILL HOW FUCKING STILL -- not released a debut album. When he announced it was finally dropping in February, it was met with skeptic eyes. He’d “announced” before. Shit, he’d even posted track lists of albums that never saw the light of day. He was a tease’s tease. It ended up getting a release date of March 12. As the pandemic got really bad in the March 11 zone, he finally had an actual reason to delay the proceedings (the plan: a studio live stream listening party*).

But no -- this is Jay Electronica. Why wouldn’t he drop as the world was ending? The same reason why his costar wouldn’t not have a watch like a Saudi prince. It had to end for it to happen. I wish I saved the memes, because they were fantastic. All I have is my own Twitter memory to prove it happened:

I love this song entirely: the “get the gat” hook (soooo New Orleans), Hov calling out the NFL/acquaintances clout chasing his potential death/rapping forever bars, Jay Elect’s ham-fisted and awkward ass Farrakhan line. Everything is exactly where it should be.

Final verdict on the full album: I don’t know, a B or B+? It had a lot more Jay-Z than expected (wooo), but -- and I rarely say this -- it could have actually been longer.

16) New Found Glory - “Greatest Of All Time”

NFG with a song referencing the Jordan-Rodman-Pippen Bulls only a few months before “The Last Dance” aired. Dare we call it marketing genius? The punk beat does not care; the punk beat is too busy taking souls.

15) Dave Hause f/ Amythyst Kiah & Kam Franklin - “Your Ghost”

“I can’t breathe”

On the heels of the George Floyd/BLM protests came Dave Hause’s somber attempt to capture the moment, desperation, and hurt. On a podcast, he said he was aware he might not ever lead the movement but still wanted to contribute something in an effort to use his platform as a white artist to change someone, anyone’s mind going forward.

14) Taylor Swift - “this me trying”

The chorus makes me feel like the crowd is parting like the Red Sea on a high school -- shit, no, middle school -- dance floor; smoke machine and all. Your crush is waiting for you on the other side. What are you going to say?

13) Phoebe Bridgers - “Kyoto”

Phoebe is one of the best lyricists out because of her specificity, but even though this song is about her dad, you can really fit it to your own narrative.

12) The Lawrence Arms - “Last, Last Words”

The Lawrence Arms wrote their new record (which singer Chris McCaughan described as “this end of the world outpost”) prior to the pandemic, but once you start to process album themes -- and research its namesake -- you do wonder. All of this, combined with some “Catcher In The Rye” references, and we’ve got ourselves a winning formula.

Dressed to kill for oblivion

11) New Lenox - “Fairytale Of Gary, Indiana”

Your boy plays drums and is on the cover art for this one. Dave Rokos wrote the tune, which references The Pogues’ “Fairytale of New York”. Good news: no slurs in the Gary version. We’ll have you in and out in 90 seconds. Also: say hello to the recording debut of Alisa Caruso (some backup vox at the end).

10) Beach Slang - “Tommy In The 80s”

My most played song of 2020, but it really was more of a byproduct of how early in the year the album dropped. I’m still such a sucker for it, though. Other than forced nostalgia, not totally sure what the track is about. Did learn Beach Slang recruited former Replacements bassist Tommy Stinson to play on their LP, which was named -- /deepest of breaths -- “The Deadbeat Bang of Heartbreak City” (so maybe it has something to do with that).

9) Juice WRLD f/ Mashmello - “Come & Go”

The :55 mark. Wait until the :55 mark. When the guitar kicks in and tempo doubles, we have a real “oh, shit!” moment. I knew who Juice was when he passed but only “Liquid Dreams”. His 2020 album (“Legends Never Die”) showed us of what could have been; 55 minutes, loaded with cameos and creativity and experimentation. This song had me in its gravitational pull immediately. By the end of the year, they were using it on sports broadcasts, and it felt like a ubiquitous part of the culture.

One of my favorite days of 2020 was visiting the Juice mural in Chicago with my wife. We went impulsively during the day after someone posted a picture on Twitter.

I snapped one of my own and posted to IG with the Signals Midwest lyric “There is such quiet grace in private moments in public spaces”. The band responded with “RIP JUICE”; the perfect online exchange.

Shortly after, I was out with a different group of friends, and we went back at night. This time, it was protected by a fence you had to squeeze past. When we got through, there were kids in there smoking, taking pictures, just hanging out; empty liquor bottles lined the bottom of the mural. Even though it didn’t take all that long to make it there, it still felt like a journey and total ‘movie moment in real life’; a complete rarity in a year like 2020.

8) Mac Miller - “Good News”

Maybe I’ll lay down for a little...

Sadly continuing the theme of artists gone too soon, we have this reflective Mac Miller single, which feels more like self-eulogy than traditional rap. You feel it the entire time. The song crests with “There’s a whole lot more for me waitin’ on the other side”, and it conveys a readiness for whatever happens next.

7) The Dirty Nil - “Done With Drugs”

I don’t pray to Jesus or even own a suit

We lost the creators of our last two songs to substances, and, if we are to take this song at face value, The Dirty Nil don’t want to go down the same path. Drying out never sounded so cool and defiant... until the IKEA suggestion.

6) The Weeknd - “Blinding Lights”

Uptempo Abel is undefeated. My favorite pop song of 2020 has you feeling like you’re speeding through the empty streets of nighttime Las Vegas in a stolen car; indifferent to your environment, only tuned in to your personal desire.

And, on the lamer side of the spectrum, it spawned a catchy TikTok dance.

5) Spanish Love Songs - “Self-Destruction (As A Sensible Career Choice)”

It won’t be this bleak forever... yeah, right.

SLS has always been over-the-top with their lyrics spotlighting the hopelessness of the human condition -- so it was the *perfect* combo to being locked inside with nothing looking to forward to. Bonus: fun cake video.

Though the song’s core is uncut despair, a random moment I remember from 2020 was my wife telling me “I can hear you smiling as you’re singing” from another room as I belted the despondent chorus.

4) Worst Party Ever - “False Teeth”

This song sounds like The Front Bottoms; insecure yet so full.

3) Run The Jewels - “the ground below”

There were a lot of songs *about* 2020, but I’m not sure any artist soundtracked what being alive now is like more than RTJ. My favorite rap song and rap record of 2020.

Fav Killer Mike line: “Not a holy man, but I'm moral in my perversiveness / So I support the sex workers unionizing their services”

Fav El-P line: “I'll slap a dying child he don't pronounce my name correct”

2) The Menzingers - “America Pt. 2″

The Menzingers unexpectedly released an acoustic, re-done version of 2019′s “America (You’re Freaking Me Out)” single. It dropped on my birthday -- June 5th, 2020 -- as the rage in this country boiled over and protesters took to the streets. Though some of the lyrics remained the same, the new ones were changed with true purpose:

Well George Floyd was murdered by a cop The whole world saw the video and watched Now justice is long overdue Grab your pitchforks, we’re heading to Pennsylvania Avenue

I had nothing left when the first pre-chorus hit: “I hope the Devil and Donald and Mitch McConnell rot in hell for all tomorrows”. Tattoo this on my fucking soul.

All funds from the song were donated to Community Bail Funds (via Act Blue) & Campaign Zero. I purchased the track before hearing a note.

1) Machine Gun Kelly - “My Bloody Valentine”

Going into the year, I couldn’t tell you the difference between Machine Gun Kelly and Mac Miller -- now they’re both fixtures in this Top 10. All I really knew about MGK involved tattoos and a rap battle lost to Eminem (not that anyone ever beats Eminem).

In 2020, he took a punk/emo turn, with the services of GOAT drummer Travis Barker and new squeeze Megan Fox at his side. This song’s lyrics could potentially be cheesy but aren’t -- they all land. From the simulation going bad to not wanting “fake love” to all the damn second guessing and the earnestness that just won’t let you off the mat.

Every piece to the puzzle adds something: the messy hair, the Ken doll build, the forced iconic pink guitar that now feels actually iconic. It was almost like no one had any fun this year so he could have all of it on our behalf. There’s a half second shot of him sticking his tongue our during the pre-chorus, a joy 99.99% of us never got to feel.

The album itself was just as fantastic*; a 2000′s pop punk throwback with a Halsey duet, horrible skits (hi, Pete Davidson FaceTime), OpIvy lyrical nod (complete with a royalty check), a warp speed punk track that doesn’t even crack the minute mark, your token 6/8 ballad, acoustic closer (about his daughter), and some experimentation that leaves the new genre but still stays nearby; shades of Lil Peep, if he had Blink-182 as his backing band. Speaking of, please do not miss Travis’ fill at the 2:30 mark.

(* - named “Tickets To My Downfall”... woof)

MGK could get cancelled tomorrow, but we’ll always have this year in a bottle. The acoustic version of the song (sung in a lower resister), the 10 minute making of video (that I watched, uh, twice)... shit, he even turned it into a medley at the start of 2021.

It might be cliche to say “stay winning”, but when someone stacks this many W’s with no end in sight, what the fuck else do you call it? Real love.

* * *

Thank you so much for reading. Here is the Spotify playlist (includes 87 of the 88 songs).

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pennyserenade · 4 years ago

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FIRST LINE GAME

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line. Then tag 10 of your favorite authors!

tagged by my favorite domestic slut sister: @astroboots

PUBLISHED WORKS:

scenes from a marriage (javi fic): The designs of misfortune carve themselves in the woodwork that is Colombia, marking and scarring a beautiful country for the sake of one man’s empire.

(a/n): i wrote this on a whim one night while just trying to write for the sake of writing and look where it’s got us.

freedom is just another word (frankie morales fic): Sometimes, Frankie could not stand himself. Really, despise himself.

(a/n): i did this one because i’m cruel and a slut for angst

ungodly hour (agent whiskey fic): Her knees rest on his forearms, and she pushes his shoulders into the ground beneath him, earning a groan as his head bounces lightly off of the ground.

(a/n): i wrote this one because i just wanted to write but i didn’t wanted to take a break from scenes. also, i was listening to the ungodly hour album and it makes me feel like a bad bitch so i had a desire to character a leading character that was one.

NOT PUBLISHED WORKS:

the world is yours (maxwell lord fic): Step ahead into the past. It was a meaningless, get-rich sentiment stamped on the box of each Polaroid camera they sent out, one that she’s seen a million times before but never felt the depth of until now; Maxwell has said it, willing away the accent she loves, and she knows that this is exactly what they’ve done: They’ve stepped back into a joyless, oppressive past in order to preserve some inkling of a meaningful future.

(a/n): this will probably make a debut after i finish scenes and get somewhere with freedom. the step ahead into the past bit came from a poster at my work that i saw while i was on break. this is gonna be a fic exploring the beginnings of maxwell’s desire to be something, and i hope it covers the struggles he goes through a bit better than the film. also, i’m not gonna make him the villain as much as i am going to make him the anti-hero, because who can deny that michael corleone wasn’t a baddie once or twice hm ?

strobe lights (unpublished maxwell lord fic): It was a concoction of heavily artificial music--the sort that drips in materialism and would bling if sound was tangible--and Maxwell’s insistent stare that made her do it.

(a/n): this will probably never see the light of day because it has a no real meaning, but it’s older than any of the other stuff i’ve written for the p. characters. it was made before i created this blog, and just something that got the wheels in my head turning again.

scenes from a marriage (a very very early draft that i didn’t end up liking, javi fic): He had forgotten. Or she thought he had forgotten. She couldn’t be sure yet, but the hours kept ticking away, and he hadn’t shown up yet. Javier wasn’t ever the most timely man, but he was never this late.

a/n: what are my fics, if not angst preserving?

mama, you’ve been on my mind (a fic not belonging to the pedro fandom at all, but a story about two characters that my friend created): Something had gone taut inside of Henry the day he found out that Mari had gone missing. He’d worked hard to conceal it from Stella, expressing adequate amounts of concern and worry and frustration, but he never showed the absolute panic that rattled him to his very core. He didn’t want to upset her. Stella was a great woman, but no one could stand the shade of pale he would get when he was by himself, or the way he sobbed quietly thinking about her at night in the bathroom when he was alone and Stella was asleep. He hid it from her, something he had never, ever done with Stella, because he knew that this grief was more personal than he ever wanted her to know about.

(a/n): my friend gave me henry to write with her, and we attached pedro to his face to him, but the main story is about mari, a girl who henry had married when he was a younger. they divorced later on because they both came to the conclusion that mari loved women more than she ever would love him, but he never, ever stopped caring about her. mari eventually ends up getting murdered by one of her patients (she’s a therapist) because she rejects his advances, (but i promise the story doesn’t end there, because mari is very, very cool and my friend is such a bad ass writer, i just don’t want to give it all away). anyways, this takes place shortly after mari has gone missing. at this point, it has been about tenish years since henry and mari have split and he’s remarried to stella, a woman whom he loves dearly. henry and mari remained friends, and he’s not taking it well.

untitled mando fic: His first words to her had been these: It had to be done. They were muttered with such commitment and unwavering faith, she knew that he was a man who truly believed in whatever dogma he abided by.

(a/n): this was the first thing i was gonna publish on here but everything i wrote felt odd and out of place, and i think i need a bit more time to set on this one before it goes anywhere.

let it be: (a story i was writing for a school contest but never finished): There came an awful, tightening sensation in the middle of her chest, so strong it felt like she was about to double over there, in front of all of these strangers.

(a/n): this was gonna be a story about a young woman who has just found out she was pregnant. i set it during the day that the beatles played there rooftop concert because i liked the idea of this young woman being surrounded by many people who’s eyes were glued to the sky because the beatles are playing their brand new fucking album, and she’s just coming undone. this is gonna expose me as a beatles stan and that’s okay.

diane’s a friend of mine (a story i didn’t remember writing until just now, doing this): It had all started with Diane, a woman who had loved him so passionately that he’d dated her twice. Diane was an intelligent woman with the tendency to date men who were far below her, and he wasn’t the exception as much as he was the rule. He remembered the way she didn’t mind his desire to be and do nothing on Sunday mornings, and the kind way she would trace his nose and smile approvingly before saying, “You’ve got the nose of greek gods, Francis.”

(a/n): this must’ve been written during my al pacino phase a couple of months back, and i think, as i scan over it, this is the story i wanted to write about an actor who has spent his entire life as someone else, just a plethora of different characters, so when he eventually retires, he begins to struggle with who he is. i think i wanted it to be told through the stories of women he’s loved during those years, because it’s the only time he remembers being himself.

untitled roman sionis fic: roman sionis reminded frankie terribly of fredo corleone. he was void of that pure innocence—that essence of goodness that made fredo such a lovable character—but he had the stupidity. it was a stupidity that stopped him from being something more.

(a/n): i have written about thirty roman sionis drafts but none of them amounted to anything. i think the character is neat, and had a very big ewan mcgregor phase.

an untitled fic set after the events of the panic in needle park, if anyone of you has seen that: This is where I am. This is where my stuff is. The wind was biting this morning, reddening Bobby’s cheeks as he stood on the sidewalk waiting for Eileen.

(a/n): this was definitely during my al pacino phase, it’s about how bobby gets clean and has started life with another woman because he couldn’t stay with helen because they enabled each other too much. if i’m ever gonna do anything for any of you please let it be to turn you onto al pacino’s movies in the ‘70s. all of them are fantastic, and the panic in needle park the first installment. this movie lead to al giving his famed role as michael corleone later on, and it covers a lot of topics i didn’t expect, like drug addiction and poverty and i just think al pacino is amazing in it. i cannot believe that his first movie. here’s the link to the trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watchv=0ahe2zepONg&ab_channel=JulienPinault. drug tw and needle tw.

okay i think that is all i have and i know it’s not twenty but i can’t find any more.

tagging: @mourningbirds1, @disgruntledspacedad and anyone else who wants to do it because i think you’re all neat and lovely.

#misc.#tag games.

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sunnexaltation · 4 years ago

Note

for the band ask thing!

1. Queen

2. ABBA

3. Fleetwood Mac

Alright. These are my favs. Let’s go 😼

1. Queen

Favorite Song: why must you make me choose... maybe Radio Ga Ga. but also Long Away. Or Somebody To Love. Or Cool Cat. IDK

Least Favorite Song: I love them all. Even the ones about fucking a car or sweet cheese

Have I Ever Seen Them Live: no 😔 but I have seen a pretty cool cover band

Favorite Band Member: I love them all !!!

How Many Of Their Albums I Have: I have 9 albums and 3 singles on vinyl :)))

Favorite Album: Queen II (the first vinyl I ever got)

Favorite Lyrics: the entirety of Fairy Feller’s Master Stroke

Favorite Music Video: I Want To Break Free

Ever Met Any Member: no 😔 but brian did like my insta comment once

2. ABBA

Favorite Song: this is the hardest question ever. They are all fantastic. I really love Hasta Manana and Honey, Honey tho. And underrated icon The Visitors!!

Least Favorite Song: I love them all. ABBA always released bops.

Have I Ever Seen Them Live: no. ABBA reunion tour nowwwwww

Favorite Band Member: I feel like the band isn’t the band without them all but I really like Agnetha’s vibes.

How Many Of Their Albums I Have: I have 3 albums and 2 singles on vinyl. I’d have more if they weren’t so hard to findddd.

Favorite Album: Voulez-Vous

Favorite Lyrics: Like an image passing by, my love, my life/In the mirror of your eyes, my love, my life/I can see it all so clearly/All I love so dearly/Images passing by/Like reflections of your mind, my love, my life/Are the words I try to find, my love, my life/But I know I don't possess you/With all my heart, God bless you/You are still my love and my life Song: (My Love, My Life)

Favorite Music Video: whichever one they wore those cat dresses for.

Ever Met Any Member: no :(

3. Fleetwood Mac

Favorite Song: I really love Tusk, underrated bop go listen. I also love The Ledge - it’s super short but it makes me so smiley. Gypsy is probs my most played. Hold Me is also so comforting.

Least Favorite Song: none

Have I Ever Seen Them Live: I would evaporate if I saw Stevie Nicks live.

Favorite Band Member: STEVIE DUH

How Many Of Their Albums I Have: 3 on vinyl. They are also incredibly hard to find where I live.

Favorite Album: Rumours is such a classic. It was the second vinyl that I ever got :)))

Favorite Lyrics: I don’t think I can choose. Their lyricism is so incredible and it all resonates so deeply with me.

Favorite Music Video: I don’t think I’ve seen any of their videos

Ever Met Any Members: I have not 😔

Thanks for sending this Elise!! 💛💛

#queen #abba #fleetwood mac #ask #happy-at-home

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waiting4inspiration · 5 years ago

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Changed (Stephen Strange x Reader)

Summary: Your marriage with Stephen was never been a happy one and it only got worse after the accident. When he finally comes back after being gone for close to a year, he explains that he’s aware of his past actions and shows you that he’s a changed man

Warnings: little angst, fluff, implied smut at the end

Marvel Masterlist

Long shifts at the hospital are always energy-draining. But getting back home and finally getting off your feet is always a relief that you never get tired of. Even after being a neurosurgeon for over 5 years.

As always, you come back to a quiet and dark home. It’s been that way ever since Stephen left. Your husband. And since it’s been close to a year now, you have become used to having to switch on lights when you return from a late-night shift.

Only this time, there a side lamp in the living room that’s glowing brightly and you don’t remember leaving it on before you left. Slowly placing your bag on the ground and walking towards the light, your eyes scan around the room for any signs of an intruder. When your eyes land on an open photo album on the coffee table, your heart sinks into your stomach because you know who might be in your house now.

“You just got off work?” that familiar voice asks behind you, causing you to spin around and stare with wide eyes at Stephen standing a few feet away from you. “You don’t normally work the long shifts,” he states, taking a step forward toward you.

Shaking your head, you step back with each step forward he takes and fold your arms over your chest. “Well, I had to take on as many shifts as I can after you left,” you snap, your glare making him freeze in his tracks and drop his head between his shoulder. “You know, leaving me to deal with bankruptcy, trying to keep this house and fending off every single loan shark because of your vanity to try and fix your hands,” you hiss, letting your hands drop to your side as you laugh sarcastically. “What the hell are you doing here?”

He lifts his head to look at you. Noticing something different in his eyes makes you shift on your feet. “I know you must want nothing to with me,” he starts, blinking at you as he swallows nervously. “Especially after the way I’ve treated you in our relationship. How I’ve disrespected you...”

You laugh at his words and shake your head. “That’s putting lightly, Stephen,” you say, rubbing your hands against your thighs as you drop your head to stare the ground. “You belittled and mocked me, always looking at the things I did wrong in my career,” you point out, glancing back up at him as you bite your lip. “Do you even remember when I told you that I saved a little girls life when everyone else thought that she would die?” you question, Stephen going to reply but you hold up your hand. “No. You don’t. You only saw the things I did wrong, the people who I couldn’t save and you told me that you were ashamed of me because of my mistakes,” you add, wrapping your arms around yourself as you stare at him with sad eyes. “I had to do all that myself. And it made me wonder why I was even married to you in the first place if you were never there for me.”

Stephen sighs as he begins to walk towards you again. “I know. Believe me, I know and understand everything that I’ve put you through,” he says, feeling relieved when you don’t try to step away from him. “I’ve seen it all. With new eyes and a different mind. I’ve changed,” he explains, slowly reaching out to take your hand in his.

“What do you mean you’ve seen it?” you ask, lowering your gaze as he weaves his finger with yours.

“I’ve seen how dedicated you are to your career, how dearly you love me despite how I’ve treated you,” he explains, resting his forehead against the top of your head. “It’s a lot to explain but if you give me the chance, I will tell you everything,” he says, pressing his nose into your hairline, waiting for you to agree.

Pulling away out of his arms, you stare up at him and bite your lip. “You just left, without a word and now you want me to give you a chance?” you ask, pulling your hand out of his and glaring at him. “How can I take your word that you’ve changed?”

Stephen sighs, dropping his head as he shakes his head to himself. Lifting his hands, a golden glow surrounds them as a portal opens beside him. In this portal, a memory plays from when you and Stephen were still in medical school.

You both were so young and your relationship was still new, so you could keep your hands off each other. And it made studying hard. But still, the sight of the memory makes you smile and bring your hand up to your mouth in shock. Turning your head to him, he nods his head and closes the portal with a wave of his hands.

“So, you’re like some kind of a wizard now?” you question, folding your arms as you stare at him in shock.

He chuckles at your words, taking a step closer to you and shakes his head. “Time Master,” he corrects, taking your hands back in his as his eyes stare down at the wedding ring on your finger.

Following his gaze, you smile as he lightly twists the ring, your own eye staring at the gold band around his finger. Neither of you has taken them off for different reasons. For you, it has always been a reminder of the hope that you have that Stephen will come back and change. For him, at first, it was something that he was just used to having on. But then when he became the Master and saw how much he means to you, the ring became a reminder of your love - just like it’s supposed to.

“So, if you’re a Time Master, then you can see into the future?” you ask, stepping closer to him as you weave your finger with his. “Then you know what I’m going to do?”

He chuckles, his forehead touching his forehead with yours. “There are many things you could do right now. It’s your choice which path you choose,” he states, making a giggle roll off your lips and Stephen to smile at the sound. “I haven’t you laugh in a long time,” he whispers, leaning forward to place his lips over yours.

Letting go of his hands, you move your arms to wrap around his neck as you melt into his kiss. God, he hasn’t kissed you like this in a long time and it sends butterflies fluttering wildly in your stomach. He runs his hands down your sides, cupping the back of your thighs and effortlessly lifting your off the ground, making you wrap your legs around his waist. He hasn’t touched you like this in an even longer time.

Pressing your back against the nearest wall, he grips your hip roughly and deepens the kiss. He grinds his hips against you, making you moan into his mouth as you clutch onto the side of his face, his tongue slipping into your mouth.

As his tongue explores your mouth as if it’s the first time he’s kissing you, your fingers trace his bearded jawline before grazing down his neck, his own hands run under your shirt. “I love you,” you whisper against his kiss, running your hand down his chest and tugging at the hem of his shirt as the other hand rests on his shoulder. “I always have and I always will.”

“I know you will,” he mutters, pulling your shirt over your body before placing kisses over your collar bone. “And so will I,” he states, his breath against your skin making it erupt in goosebumps. “I will always love you,” he groans, helping you pulls his shirt off his body before kissing you passionately.

You can tell that he’s changed. That he’s not the same person he was before the accident and definitely not that same person that came out of it. You know this because of how the words come out of his mouth. They’re not forced or rehearsed. They’re sincere and spontaneous, but so full of love and feeling. Just how you dreamed they would be.

I didn’t want to add a smut because this is the first time I’m writing for Stephen Strange and I didn’t want it to be a smut XD

Tags: @tephi101 @rororo06 @flokidottir-imagines-br @mad4oak @nerdypisces160 @xinyourdreamsx @vikingaestheticsblog @xenavistania @medievalfangirl @simam12 @paintballkid711 @chameerah @momc95 @lucille-lovely @marvelmenappreciation @mother-of-fire-snakes @peterman-spideyparker @mywinterwolf @ultramagicaltacofandom @princessizzy36 @death-unbecomes-you @smolbeanthings

#doctor strange imagine #doctor strange imagines #doctor strange x reader #stephen strange imagine #stephen strange x reader #doctor strange #stephen strange #stephen x reader #the avengers imagine #the avengers imagines #the avengers x reader #requests

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fmdjoosungarchive · 5 years ago

Text

fmdmeme002, but all at once so i don’t spam y’all

1) what is your goal for this year/next year?

reading the sticky note, sung’s first thought was that he’d like to do many things. but, that wasn’t specific enough for a fan to feel satisfied. releasing more music with element was important to him, but so was having the time and creativity to write more music for others, and spend more time with friends and family. in the end, it only took a glance up at the fan to figure out what he wanted to write. “to meet more fans around the world!!!!”

2) what song would you want to sing to or play for someone you like?

a giggle left his lips when the girl in front of him asked her question. “are you looking to hire me for someone special?” it was natural, to play around with fans like they were his friends. to sung, they were. “i’d play something romantic. maybe one of @fmdxsuji’s songs.”

3) what’s your favorite scent?

sung knew this question had to come from a fan who knew him well. with the amount of candles in his side of the dorm, there were many to choose from. on camera, he tended to name more ‘manly’ scents, but in the space of fans, he was honest. “soft scents,” he wrote, “strawberry lemon ice a lot lately.”

4) if you spent one day with a fan, where would you go and what would you do?

sung’s hand readied to write that they should go to a theme park, but stopped short. there was a chance he might not be feeling very high energy that day, and the fans deserved better of him. he could say the library, too, but that might be too low energy for many fans. he settled with a basic compromise of, “what you like best!!!!”

5) what new concept do you want to try showing fans?

“a cute concept! wouldn’t we be so cute? especially yujinnie.” the fan responded that they thought he’d be cute too, which, he laughed and thanked them for. he hoped as much, anyway.

6) which girl group do you like the most recently?

he glanced up through his eyelashes with a smile. “this won’t be any surprise to you,” he said, and looked back down. “wish!!!” and on either side of the word he drew ‘hang loose’ symbol hands to symbolize the key point dance from signal. if he had more time, he might have taken a picture to send to @fmdluna.

7) which boy group do you like the most recently?

with ride on the wind’s promotions, sung held onto his songs of the summer for longer than he might have normally. though he knew he wasn’t going to stray away from his usual answers, picking which one was difficult. so, he had to go with which song was on his mind the most. “nine critical beauties!!! ㅋㅋ”

8) what soloist do you like the most recently?

it was inevitable that he’d receive a question like this during his solo debut. though they might expect a playful narcissistic answer, sung felt too grateful to the people that supported him and showed up for him to do anything less than sincere. “my friend @fmdjoohwan!!!” as he handed back the album and note, he said, “isn’t he so sexy these days?” to which the fan agreed.

9) what song have you been listening to a lot that you would recommend to fans?

“knight @fmdtaeyong‘s help,” he wrote, with a slight hesitation. the fans were still only getting to know him, and how willing he was to share things he felt was important. and this, was important. the fan read back his message, and asked why, and he took a breath before he said, “it’s okay to admit we all need help sometimes.”

10) what is your most used app?

sung never thought anyone would be interested in something like what app he uses most. if he had the time to pull out his phone and check, he could probably tell them definitively, but as it was, he had to make his best guess. “kkt, i think...” he paused to think, and continued, “or twitter!”

11) what should someone do to win your heart?

there was no way sung could tell them the truth. his heart would never belong to another person, and he knew that. @fmddaisuke knew that. the world didn’t, and might not ever. the thought was... upsetting, to say the least. but, he didn’t dwell on it, as he flashed a smile, and wrote, “give me lots of love!” and surrounded it with drawings of hearts.

12) what do you want for your next birthday?

he’d learned well enough by now that these questions tended to be sneaky ways to find out what they would next gift him, especially if the person was a fansite. which, this girl was. she was very kind whenever he’d met her, and frankly, he was always happy for any korean who supported them as dearly as she did, but, he wasn’t one to seek material things anymore. he wrote down something he thought might be more helpful, “every aether to be happier than the year before.”

13) what is do you consider to be your most charming feature/trait?

sung didn’t like thinking about his physical self as attractive. the only person he cared to be attractive for was his boyfriend, and even then, he’d rather have his personality shine through his looks. it may have been a simple answer, but he wrote, “kindness,” and slid the album back to the fan. aloud, he told them, “to me, being kind is one of the most admirable traits there is.”

14) what is your favorite flavor of ice cream?

there were so many to choose from. sung never liked sticking to one kind for too long, not when a new wild flavor would be coming out every month. the classics were great, the ones he couldn’t even fathom what they might taste like were great. but, he went for middle of the road, “rocky road!!!,” and drew a mountain underneath for the words to follow.

15) how should i ask out the person i like?

“trust yourself,” he wrote, but didn’t feel like that was adequate. he held up a hand, and the fan took it, interlocking their fingers. “show them how much you care, and be straightforward. and, if they don’t feel the same way, it’s their own loss. you can only accept their affections if it’s as strong as yours.”

16) what’s the secret behind your good looks?

plastic surgery. that wasn’t a good answer. that was, more accurately, a terrible answer. sung thought he looked nice before his procedures, but, not good enough, he guessed. “a healthy skincare regime!”

17) what do you think of fans of the same gender as you?

element seemed to have a greater mix of genders in their fans. like with most idol groups, the majority leaned towards women, but sung particularly liked when men came up. it was... exhilarating. like a shot of adrenaline. this man seemed quite confident in meeting him, which sent a pang to his heart that they were still shy enough to write their question on a sticky note. “the more i meet, the happier sungie is!”

18) what is the most recent thing that made you happy?

right after their official debut, it probably was the most obvious that that would be the happiest moment. nothing else compared, in his eyes. but, most recently? “a delicious breakfast!” he wrote, and drew a small drawing of himself eating from a bowl.

19) what is your happiness level these days on a scale from 0 to 100?

if he really thought about it, it might not be that high. the thought wasn’t a great one to have. he’d just had his solo debut, with an entire mini album, mostly created by himself. but it was hard, different, the things expected of him were different. he made a compromise, writing “90!!!” and drew a little face in the zero.

20) can you give some inspiring words for someone going through a hard time?

whenever sung received this question, he worried that the fan was the one going through a difficult time. with his hand on the fan’s, he could tell them his own truth. “let yourself feel what you feel. and when you have, breathe it back out. let it off of your shoulders, so that you can remember a new day will come.”

21) what words of advice would you give to someone studying for their college exam?

“don’t listen to decipher sunbaenim’s ring ding dong!!!” the joke he wrote down was silly enough. he knew from personal experience how terribly that song could get stuck in someone’s head while studying. but, he added a second note below that, something that mattered more, in his opinion. “and accept that you’re still smart and amazing no matter how you do.”

22) give yourself a percent ranking from 0 to 100 in the following categories: cute, cool, and sexy.

some recess in sung hoped he could be 100 in all of the categories presented to him. if there was one that stuck out above the rest, though, it was cuteness. he wrote down an 80, for that. it was a decent score, not high enough too many people would disagree, hopefully. next was sexy, at 70. as much as he didn’t care for the image, gold star did like to present him as a sexy type, and sung couldn’t deny it. and, coming up in last, was cool, at 40. sung had never considered himself the traditionally cool type, but he was alright with that.

23) what place do you want to travel to the most?

sung didn’t think much about vacations, or anything of that nature. the first thing that came to mind was to travel back home. the second, to japan with @fmddaisuke, to see his family, because he knew how much his boyfriend ached for them. but, in the end, he wrote down, “wherever our aether are!”

24) what language would you like to learn?

language was a tricky subject for sung. he felt like he was pretty good at korean, all things considered. he was well-read, and expanded his vocabulary often enough. when it came to other languages, he had trouble making sentences himself. he’d been told he had great accents, and he could understand someone when they were speaking in english or japanese, for the most part, but responding back... was a gamble. he felt like he was already trying hard enough with english and japanese, so he went for the language he heard often that he didn’t mostly understand, “spanish!!!”

25) what is the first thing you think of when someone mentions your fans?

the relationship sung had with his fans wasn’t as complicated as it seemed it was for many of his friends. sure, there were people that didn’t follow element’s career the way he would, but sung didn’t consider those people to be much of fans. the fans were the ones who supported them fully, from a distance, and enjoyed them for what they were. they were the ones who brought sung joy. “happiness”

26) what is your favorite movie/book you’ve seen/read recently?

in the space of these close fan interactions, sung could be more honest than he might have otherwise. chances were, only interns at the company and aethers would see his response. he read often, watched movies on a regular basis as well, though not as often as he read, so choosing one was difficult. but, the one that had stuck out the most to him recently was, “call me by your name!!”

27) what are your recent wishes?

“element and aether’s happiness”. writing the words down wasn’t a difficult decision. sung knew in his heart those were two of his wishes. he supposed part of him wished for element’s success too. even if he was happy with where they were at, he knew his members weren’t. and they deserved the world.

28) what are the requirements for your ideal type?

it was a common question. part of the fantasy of being an idol meant the expectation that fans would want to date him. but unlike some of his other members, sung enjoyed it. playing along was fun, when the fan knew the limits of their relationship. when it came to sung, there weren’t many restrictions. he wanted to know their fans in as close of a capacity as he could, because he felt like they deserved that. like most other times that question had come up, it was written on a sticky note, that he could playfully hide as he wrote, “to be as sweet as you!” before giving it back, and seeing the happy blush on the fan’s face.

29) what job would you want if you weren’t an idol?

before being in element, sung never considered that question. what he might want was very different from what he might have ended up doing. he knew that if he never made it into debut, he’d have stayed in his family’s business, and likely been miserable. but over the years, he had the opportunity to actually think on that question. most of the time, he threw out one of the many jobs he thought might have been cool, but this time, like many other instances, he went with what felt the most fitting for him, “a teacher,” to which he drew an apple beside it.

30) what is a hobby you’d like to pick up?

the fan was pretty young, for their usual demographic. positively adorable, but also confident enough to ask their question to his face, rather than write it down. his answer came quickly, “cooking!” though he had many hobbies he admired, wanting to become a better cook had been a dream for quite a long time, which he continued to share with the fan. they expressed the sentiment of wanting to help teach him, and he agreed they’d need to sort that out, before the fan was ushered over to @fmdyujin.

#fmdmeme002 #ask meme #tried tagging specific ppl mentions but i may have missed sum #i unno #like i've done before there are screenshots of the asks so yall dont think im cheating

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kae-karo · 6 years ago

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marianas trench: phantoms

the absurd album overanalysis, commentary, and ranking nobody asked for

first, my personal ranking (don’t get me wrong tho i love the entire damn album):

1. wish you were here 1. don’t miss me 1. the death of me 2. your ghost 2. the killing kind 3. only the lonely survive 3. echoes of you 4. glimmer 4. i knew you when 4. eleonora

the album as a whole: oh such an awesome story and so awesomely inspired by the horror genres?? i think some of the non-singles hit the horror mark better but like oh my god it’s such a cool vibe the whole entire thing???? i know the concept was like,,,,,,descent into madness but you can totally feel this struggle with it and with the idea of a doomed/dead relationship, it’s just so so well done??? my one complaint is that i’m not musically inclined enough to recognize where all the references are bc unlike in no place like home and dearly departed, there aren’t really as many lyric references to other albums/songs, it’s more the music. and i know it well enough to go ‘oh that’s familiar, for sure’ but i can’t for the life of me figure out where from (in most cases)

eleonora: i mean the title is based on the short story by edgar allan poe (x) true to theme from the beginning, which (long story short) is about a woman the narrator falls in love with (well, his cousin) but she’s ill and will die, blah blah blah she does and the narrator vows never to marry anyone else but later he does and his first love comes back from beyond the grave to give her blessing for the new marriage - already basically i’m getting vibes of like,,,,,,a genuine desire to move on? which is great imo and like a step forward from previous albums? plus the whole acapella delivery is super reminiscent of so it goes (x) and the layered voices reminiscent of the intro to end of an era (x). plus we have the direct ref to the raven (x) by poe with ‘midnight dreary’. also the idea of ‘don’t hush’ which is later touched on as ‘just hush’ in the killing kind? oof interesting v v interesting

only the lonely survive: a bop a massive bop but! also! just a very intriguing take (at least to me) on a doomed-to-fail relationship, the idea that you can actively acknowledge a relationship is hurting both parties but...choose to stay. i also like the idea (which i might just be extrapolating) that to truly live, to have a really poignant relationship, you have to sort of give yourself over to it? ‘only the lonely survive’ - only those who isolate themselves truly ‘get out alive’ if you will but like, that’s the beauty of putting yourself out there? is like, you truly feel everything, i guess. ‘it hurts like hell to love this well’ sort of touches on that same idea for me. anyway the whole thing goes hard as hell and i love it. ‘he’ll never know you / not the way that i knew you’ we love intra-album references !!!

echoes of you: okay didn’t love this at first bc it felt repetitive (and it was coming on the heels of only the lonely survive which i adored) but it also felt really unique and a little different? when the released it as a single, it’s the first time i thought of this album as truly horror-inspired and totally picked up on the tell-tale heart vibe (x) which was just so interesting, i love how stories like that have turned into these really fresh songs that still call back to these kinds of madness-inspiring stories - that a love can inspire that kind of madness, even when it’s gone. i also wonder if the idea of ‘can’t stop myself from falling now’ has less to do with falling in love (which is, for me, the immediate connotation) and more to do with ‘falling into madness’. the verses and the tempo are so well-paced as well, like this frantic feeling? then the chorus comes in with this suspenseful set of chords? and the theremin in the background!!!! the best way to give a truly Spooky™ vibe. the idea of tell-tale heart, the story, too, is that the narrator is trying to sound completely sane, and explain the murder they’ve committed and why it was justified - that goes along with the theme of this album, too, where there’s this undercurrent of trying to insist that the doomed relationship is somehow justifiable

don’t miss me?: oh i adore this and the idea of ‘oh hah yeah no i don’t miss you like at all,,,,,,,,,,,,,do you ‘not miss me’ too?’ and like this,,,,,,not obsession but the idea of trying to actively move past missing someone? but just constantly getting caught up on it? unrelated to the meaning but oh my god the little background vocals, adore it. ‘some people try to raise the dead / some people try to live instead’ is like. that’s one of those things that i lowkey would love to get tattooed on my body or something. just really good words, because that’s what it’s like moving on from a rough relationship - and it’s hard to like, see that when you’re in the thick of it? bc like imagine losing a loved one and trying to bring them back to life - we’ve all heard the story, it’s never what’s expected, it’s never quite right and the same goes for relationships. and so, the idea of living instead, of moving on. also the vocal run up to the high note toward the end (x - look idk Music Words) reminds me of something but i can’t quite place it. also ‘i don’t remember why we stayed’ and then in wish you were here, we get ‘i don’t recall now why we’re buried’ which is a fun contradiction

wish you were here: that middle-of-the-night madness that goes alongside one love (x) like,,,,,if you took it one step on the other side of madness and entertained the idea of reviving a relationship that should be dead. except it’s such a bop unlike one love, like it sounds a lot like it could be on astoria, and it’s got that back beat matching this means war (x) in fact, it feels like the exact polar opposite of this means war (like...instead of ‘lmao i’m totally awesome without you’ it’s like ��i’m,,,,,maybe not doing so great without you, shit i really wish you were here, wish we were together’)? but with the same sort of vibe in terms of the music itself? and the outro (x) reminds me hardcore of something else i can’t quite place

your ghost: this one also reminds me a lot of the general vibe of astoria with hints of like. modern touches? this one reminds me a lot of wildfire actually? (x) but a bit more upbeat? like that guitar style i think is what does it. it feels a lot like there’s this...almost unwilling pull toward the idea of ‘madness’ that they’re focused on, like....a sort of awareness of the descent? also the softer bit toward the end where it’s just josh and the guitar (x) reminds me a lot of something that i once again cannot place for the life of me

glimmer: oh no,,,,,,,,,okay first this (it’s just audio but tumblr won’t let me add audio on its own in a post like this):

youtube

so my first and most important comment is that all i can think about when i hear this song is ‘halo by beyonce halo by beyonce halo by beyonce halo by beyonce’ and it tends to run over everything else lmao. but! i think conceptually it’s more of that descent into madness, into seeing some sort of trace of a relationship, like some sort of residual glimmer that sticks to things, to people. ‘it’s funny what you find when you go without’, like the idea of....probably hallucinating in a sense, but starting to see the relationship/the other person everywhere, on everything, when you’re missing them? even to the point that, when the person comes back, maybe the memories of that relationship stick around too - ‘you’ve changed but it’s not enough / and doubt is insidious / creeps up on you softly / i can’t get it off me, i can’t get it off me now’ like this idea that even though it’s something wanted, to come back together (no matter how bad it might end up), memories and the past can’t really be forgotten - ‘you’ve changed but it’s not enough’ - very reminiscent of wildfire (x - ‘so now you show up when you’re alone again / but we haven’t changed, but now you’re interested) ngl too the overall feeling of the song reminds me of one love? (x)

i knew you when: so this song sorta came out of nowhere to me, like it felt weird and off-kilter like...i knew you when? when what? but like. now it makes a lot more sense, in this sort of...well, twisted way. it feels like things have been twisted around. it comes off the back of glimmer, too, and i think that’s like - oh, these memories are here, lingering, and this is almost a deep-dive into them? it tells a bit of a story and i think it’s less abstract, but it definitely harps hard on the idea that ‘i’ve been loving, loving you too long to just sudden-suddenly move on from this’ that sort of encompasses the entire album really cleanly. it’s interesting, actually, it almost feels like a very sincere moment of clarity and specificity amidst a mess of this drifting toward ‘madness’, but still hinting at that little bit of ‘okay but if you want to....i’ll know you then’, this like concession to that madness, an indulgence in it?

the death of me: oh catch me melting over the transition between songs, utterly seamless. love it. this one is another one that like....feels like a breath of clarity in awareness? like this acknowledgment that there’s something off, this lingering desire for someone from the past, that there’s an emptiness, that this new thing isn’t right, even if it’s something wanted. because other wanted things (or people) make it impossible. i think it’s also the first time in a while where another party (ie not them nor the person they’ve got this tangled relationship with throughout the album so far) is mentioned which is v interesting. i think this track does an excellent job of bringing a ghostly vibe to it, the echoing vocals and background sounds, they almost elicit this feeling of like. the person is drifting away from the person they’re trying to make a new start with, like literally drifting? almost being pulled in by the ‘madness’? and it’s a heartbreaking song, too, bc there’s this emanating desperation to like...move on? and make things work? but this acknowledgement that...maybe that’s not happening? maybe it’s not possible? maybe there’s too much baggage, in a sense? there’s also that very long outro that starts off a little intriguing, adventurous almost, and then descends into this frightening crescendo (x - that also has a hint of something else in it) before these voices come in, crescendoeing again into this sudden stop and then you’ve got josh saying ‘save me from myself’ which i feel like is a reference?????? also cannot believe they made me download that and reverse it so i could figure that out lmao

the killing kind: it wouldn’t be a mt album without a song that’s all over the place and somehow still cohesive and intriguing, huh? oh big mood for the intro, with the very great imagery of wandering a haunted house at night, staring into the shadows, and then ‘the killing kind’ - i think the whole thing is a super interesting concept, again, this acceptance of some of the fault in a failed relationship? ‘but you’ve been haunted too’ and yet not all of it, i think a lot of media represents things as black and white, with all the blame on one person, when that’s rarely the case? anyway, it’s interesting it’s addressed. ‘nevermore’ of course being another edgar allan poe reference (disclaimer there may be other references i’m missing since i’m not massively well-read in the horror genre) i’m also intrigued by ‘can’t get out / from under it / nevermore to leave here’, is that a lover dearest (x) reference? bc that’s what came to mind, honestly. again, excellent with the background vocals giving that eerie vibe. and then the stephen king ‘it’ reference with ‘we all float down here’. ngl that one feels a little forced but again, i’m like. not well-read in the horror genre so there may be more layers to that one than i know. ‘it gazes back / sings to me / i know my love can be the killing kind’ - i think this is interesting that it sings back, that feels very much like a callback that maybe their own previous songs are hinting at the love being ‘the killing kind’. also ‘you should never be here’ makes me think of something (x) the hard guitar/violins in the background during ‘here and now / this is it’ etc remind me of something else. and then ofc we have the astoria run/vocals (x) and then the ref to echoes of you (although it sounds like the slightest pitch lower than in echoes of you?) and then the whole bit with ‘don’t love the bottle’ i swear on my life it sounds like it comes from somewhere? same with the background melody? but i have no idea where, it just sounds like a reference. and then we have the background little melody (x) after he says ‘a hidden melody’ so it’s like reinforced that it’s a reference but idk where from rip lmao. edit: ty to the lovely anon who mentioned it’s from masterpiece theater!!!!! and once again a++++ use of a theremin in the background for max spooky vibes. also ‘evermore’ is totally a reference to ever after (x) along with the little lift after that (i assume) and then the whole acapella bit calls back to eleonora and the ‘now’ bit to something (x) plus the ‘hear me now’ from something wow i’m great at this game lmao as well as the ‘don’t you hear me’ part. ‘we could be together here / forever we’re together bound in madness’ i think again a lover dearest and then ofc we have the vocal runs from something (x) and then the strong background violin from another thing (yeah yeah i know they’re all references i just don’t know what from) and then he says ‘just hush eleonora’ which, as previously mentioned, is a very intriguing development from ‘don’t hush’ like this,,,,,,acceptance of the madness? and then ofc he says ‘eleonoria’ in ref to astoria. edit: also the whole ending is so so similar to the ending of ever after

#marianas trench #phantoms #kt #oh my god i'm so bad at musical references #when it's lyrics i got it easily #but oh my god #someone sned hlep #this feels so incomplete #ah well c'est la vie i suppose

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music2liveby · 5 years ago

Audio

DAY 214: Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri

Album: lovestrong Release: May 10th, 2011 Genre: Pop

When tallying the subject matter of songs across all of history, I think no topic takes the cake quite like love and heartbreak. Across all genres, in all periods of music, you don’t have to look very far to find a song focused on the complex emotions surrounding a failed relationship. To call the market oversaturated with love songs is an understatement. Especially when it comes to modern pop, that’s a large portion of what relates to audiences and therefore gains traction with listeners. I’m not necessarily opposed to the idea of writing these types of songs, but you better bring something extra special to the table as an artist if one so chooses to take the easy way out. Upon her arrival to the music industry, many critics felt the same way about Christina Perri in her debut album lovestrong. As its name implies, much of the album is centered around Perri’s personal experience with heartbreak from her divorce while she lived in Los Angeles. However, her motivation drove her to compile an album that came straight from the heart and comes off less as filler. Motivation and momentum would carry Christina Perri through her early career, born within a musical family that includes her brother Nick who has played with bands like Shinedown. Christina was not initially set on the path her brother had followed, but began blazing her own trail at 16 by teaching herself guitar by watching Shannon Hoon of Blind Melon perform on VH1. Her dedication pushed her well out of her comfort zone as she came into adulthood, moving away from her home in Philadelphia to the glamour and glitz of Los Angeles at the age of 21. Perri faced a familiar challenge of up and coming artists that moved to the area: alone to fend for yourself in a city that takes no prisoners. According to Perri, the struggle was fierce and she cried nearly every night from the pressure of being on her own. Despite the odds being against her, she worked hard to establish her life in LA, working at the Melrose Cafe for a day job and getting married. After a divorce only 18 months later, the city proved too much for Perri at the time and she moved back to Philadelphia in 2009. It was during this period that she penned her first breakthrough song, Jar of Hearts, but she wouldn’t immediately reap the fruits of her labor. Perri later would move back to LA in hopes of achieving her dreams, and received a much needed boost by the TV show So You Think You Can Dance, who featured Jar of Hearts in a dance routine. Seemingly overnight, America wanted to know where this angelic voice came from, and shot Jar of Hearts up to number seven on the Billboard charts. It didn’t take long for labels to take notice either, as Atlantic Records signed Perri to a record deal that would produce her debut lovestrong. I can’t really put my finger on what leads me to hold Jar of Hearts so dearly to my heart, especially when Christina Perri has a slew of songs that match the raw emotion of her debut single. I think it’s the slight edge that Jar of Hearts has in its biting lyrics that are merciless towards Perri’s ex-husband; the words cut like razor blades in contrast to the beautifully composed symphonic section that develops a dissonance unlike any pop song I remember hearing in recent years. I’m always trying to steer the common listener towards some of the best in the business in the modern age, and I simply can’t say enough about Christina Perri. She just recently gave birth to a baby girl and announced four years of sobriety, so it seems as if she’s only going to higher places as time rolls on!

#Jar of Hearts #Christina Perri #lovestrong #Pop #365songs

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carriecourogen · 6 years ago

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In Times of Chaos, Maggie Rogers Serves a Much-Needed Catharsis

Three-quarters of the way through Heard It In A Past Life, Maggie Rogers recalls words of wisdom implored decades before her: Standing, staring straight ahead, listening when Stevie says: Come out of the darkness.

Rogers isn’t the first millennial to look to the past — or Stevie Nicks, in particular — for inspiration. But on her full-length major label debut, she voyages to the lighthouse and returns to report on the revelations made in ways that feel not derivative or contrived, but fresh, invigorating, and necessary for our times.

We are living in an increasingly unstable world, and those of 24-year-old Rogers’ generation are bearing the brunt of it. We’re the first generation all but guaranteed not to be more financially successful than our parents, the ones navigating an imploding and underpaying job market, the ones facing the downright terrifying possibility that the world will encounter apocalyptic climate crisis before we’ve even reached retirement age. Can you really blame us for being the most anxious generation yet? After all, on top of trying to clean up the world’s messy shit, we’re still 20-somethings with personal crises of our own.

It makes sense, then, that the current musical landscape seems a little bleak — and not just in the resurgence of intimately emotional indie singer-songwriters. Pop music, once considered to be joyous, saccharine stuff, is getting sadder. A recent study found that pop songs’ mood has been trending downward considerably in the past few decades, with fewer songs conveying “happiness” or “brightness” and more ticking off the “sadness” box. In 2014, the Billboard Hot 100 chart was topped by Pharrell Williams’ infectious, sunshine-kissed bop “Happy” (I swear, you can’t make this stuff up). Five years later, the number one song is Halsey’s “Without Me,” a brooding breakup track released via a tweet that said “Here are my insides. Handle them with care.”

Maybe this is why Maggie Rogers feels like such a breath of fresh air. Rejoice, our times are terrible, indeed, but her music is a spot of brightness in a world that seems to be growing more grim every day. Her music is the stuff of joy, hard-won optimism in the face of challenge. It’s the kind of cathartic dance party you throw in spite of — and sometimes because of — darkness, not in ignorance of it.

Rogers’ story goes a little like this: The rural Maryland native enrolled at NYU to study at the esteemed Clive Davis Institute of Recorded Music. Nicknamed “Banjo Girl,” she played the requisite Brooklyn and East Village venues with her folk band, but living in the city, as well as a semester in Paris, exposed Rogers to hip-hop, dance, and electronic music. Though revelatory, it led to confusion about what kind of artist she wanted to be. Rogers put music on hold for a few years and instead pursued a journalism career, interning for Elle and helping Lizzy Goodman with her oral history of New York’s music scene in the early-aughts, Meet Met In The Bathroom.

All that changed in 2016, when Pharrell appeared as a surprise guest at the then-senior’s masterclass to critique students’ work. Rogers played a demo she wrote in 15 minutes and finished just moments before the class started. A video of that exchange, in which the veteran producer’s reactions flash across his face in real time as he listens to “Alaska” — surprise, awe, amusement, moved — was uploaded to Reddit. “I’ve never heard anything that sounds like that,” he concludes, telling her he has absolutely no notes for her. Days after she graduated and moved home, the video went viral and, suddenly, Rogers was the subject of a major label bidding war.

The catapult to fame and a career — a rushed EP, a year-long world tour, and multiple TV appearances — left Rogers panicked and overwhelmed, feeling like her life was happening to her, completely out of control. Heard It In A Past Life is loosely a concept album that reckons with the aftermath of virality, one that declares agency in the face of such radical upheaval. Musical reflections on the trials and tribulations of fame can be hit or miss, more often ringing “woe is me” than not. But Rogers’ youth is her benefit; at the end of the day, it’s an album not so much about fame as it is about change.

A track like “Overnight” may explicitly be about the bizarre ways Rogers’ life, and the people in it, changed abruptly with fame. But it also shares a feeling of camaraderie for anyone in this quarter life stage beginning to grasp the breakneck pace of life when pausing briefly to look back, realizing that the people we were or the people we loved just a short time ago feel like strangers.

On “Fallingwater” Rogers speaks to the imposter syndrome that can cripple us in the face of success, the way we can feel confused or ungrateful for allowing terror to dominate our emotions even when things are objectively good. Go on and tell me just how I could allow, she sings, all this light to end up somehow where it’s getting darker.

She works through the complicated emotions more explicitly on “Light On,” sharing glimpses of scared tears shed in bathrooms, the strangers telling her she must be so happy with her newfound success. Rogers recognizes the give and take of the universe, that neither light nor dark can exist without the other. There’s a gratitude that her love of music — which radiates throughout the album — has gotten her this far. But she acknowledges that there may be more moments of uncertainty or doubt, hoping that she — and listeners — will remember to keep a light on to safely guide herself back home.

These contrasting shades of light and dark weave their way thematically through the album. They take up residence within her lyrics: the warmth of a sunlit lake after dark days, the slinky confidence that comes out in us when the sun goes down, the shadows of our minds, and the burning flames of happiness and love. But they also exist in the contradictory nature of her music itself. To define it strictly “pop” is a disservice to Rogers’ artistry and her knack for twisting a listener’s expectations, be it reaching back into her folk roots with deeply confessional, Laurel Canyon-reminiscent lyrics and soulful vocals that get paired up with pulsating synths and electronic beats, dipping into R&B slow jam territory, or combining organic, world music rhythms like spoons, jars, and hand claps with more traditional, infectious pop melodies. Because in the end, it’s not genre (nor even the at times imperfect production) that matters, but what each song evokes: an urgent, immediate need to move your body, a freedom that comes only with feeling lost enough within the music to shake off whatever it is that haunts you — even if just for a few minutes — and dance.

There’s a metaphor Jane Fonda uses when speaking about personal growth that I’ve been thinking about a lot when listening to Rogers’ album. You can, as Fonda recalls doing for many years, drift through the current of life like a leaf. Or, you can choose to put your oars in the water and try to “determine what direction you want to go in” and move with intention, refusing to settle “for what people tell you you’re supposed to be.”

On the album’s clincher, the standout anthemic battle cry that is “Back In My Body,” Rogers offers a powerful reclamation of her voice, her story, her life. Over thumping, militaristic drum beats that gradually build, she recounts a series of panic attacks experienced while on tour before determining that she won’t allow fear to coax her into easily giving up on what she loves and holds so dearly. This time, I know I’m fighting, she sings. The past is out of her hands now, but this time, she can control her present and her future.

With Past Life, the 24-year-old Rogers has her oars firmly placed in the water. She is the captain of her career from here on out. The water might be choppy and uneven, the ride never perfect, but it will be exciting to see where she steers to next.

#my writing #maggie rogers #heard it in a past life #music #pop music #fallingwater #light on #album review #music review #y'all i love this album so much #and i waited too long to pitch something to an actual outlet #so we're bringing blogging back in 2019!!!#jess hopper said bring zines back so this is my version of that thank you for coming to my ted talk

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