#Thera tags || TBA

[dinodaddo]

@therapardalis​ said “Did you get bitten by something?”

Injury Starters - No Longer Accepting

“No, just scratched. It’ll probably just need some cleaning up,” Owen said, glancing down at his arm to get a good glimpse. Unfortunately, there was still a lot unknown about the diseases dinosaurs could carry so his biggest concern was making sure the scratch didn’t get infected. “You have any supplies?”

[omniishambles]

THERA || @therapardalis continued from here - - -

   “Oh, I should jolly well think so. If I’m not mistaken I believe one of them was his wife....”

 Jonathan shook his head, closing his mind to the situation he’d narrowly evaded. He’d lowered his voice tactfully, but the party was beckoning just through the doors ahead of them, and he, for one, would be quite glad to get back to it.

 He offered Thera his arm.

   “Time for a little more of the old champagne, eh?”

[omniishambles]

"Zira, you're being crepey again."

Random Asks || Always Accepting!

   “I beg your pardon? I’m absolutely the least creepy person you could ever hope to meet! I’m an angel, I don’t do creep- oh- ohhhhh, I see!”

 The angel looked back to the crepe mixture he’d been dutifully whisking before Thera spoke, grinning sheepishly.

   “Very good, my dear.”

[omniishambles]

@therapardalis

   “Honesty is the best policy, so I’ve been told. I happen to think that’s complete and utter wank and honesty in politics is about as useful as a dildo in a nunnery.”

[omniishambles]

THERA || @therapardalis continued from here! - - -

   “Yes. Yes, I know what you mean...”

 It took every ounce of control Jonathan had to keep his hands at his sides and resist the strange temptation to cover himself protectively, as though in sympathy of what could become of the statue in question. 

 Instead he flexed the fingers of both hands before clapping them together in a businesslike fashion, choosing to pretend that this sort of conversation simply wasn’t happening even as he continued it. 

   “Leave it to me, I’ll find an interested party. Where, ah- where did you get it from, by the by?”

[omniishambles]

THERA || @therapardalis continued from here - - -

   “Not only that, they’re fucking spreading. The only thing left for us now is to burn them all, do a full Kurt Russell on the bastards before we get turned.”

 He moved with long quick strides, a seasoned expert at getting the hell away from the scene of destruction so that he could move onto the next one. Thera had proven herself quite capable of keeping up with him, in more ways than one, and he grinned at her as he cast a glance over his shoulder.

   “Christ, I can feel my brain cells regenerating already.”

[omniishambles]

“He reeked of discount perfume.” (Malcolm)

|| SENTENCE MEME ⟶ PRODIGAL SON / 1.04 ||

   “That’s not all he reeked of.”

 The word failure drifted through his mind, but that wasn’t the specific scent he had in mind. Aside from the BO, of course. Malcolm smirked as he glanced up from his phone, first to Thera and then to the Minister’s retreating bulk.

   “If he was a time traveler I’d swear it was White Lightning. Maybe he’s got a stash of the stuff, has to fight off the alkies every night to get to his front door. It would explain the constant fog of sweat everywhere he fucking goes.”

 Cider was not the usual choice, but neither did Malcolm suspect the man could handle anything stronger. Anything approaching whiskey would probably kill him.

   “Or maybe it’s just the fear of his mistress leaking to the press.”

[omniishambles]

THERA || @therapardalis Random Muse Lyric Starter! - - -

   “Why can’t we see that when we bleed we bleed the same?”

 He was quite marvelously drunk, but that didn’t deter him from grabbing a new bottle and squinting at the label speculatively. Was it wine, or port? As he uncorked and took a sniff, he still couldn’t quite decipher it, opting to just take a hearty swig and be glad with whatever the result was.

 It was port. Ah well, it’d do.

 Jonathan stumbled backwards a couple of steps, the wall very graciously stepping in to stop him from falling over.

   “Why’s there’s always so much...bloody fighting? All the time?”

[omniishambles]

THERA || @therapardalis continued from here! - - -

   “I never even got to try those little shrimp canapes...” The angel sighed, surveying the carnage that was the snack table. Every last delicious morsel was gone and he’d only sampled- oh, not even a quarter of it! All that remained were crumbs, flakes of pastry and a lonely cup of dry bread sticks.

 Aziraphale’s head turned sharply at her suggestion, eyebrows raised.

   “Conjure up? Well, I- I really shouldn’t, you know. Especially not in front of all these humans, Thera...” He said, looking away as though checking they weren’t being overheard. However, there was a little twinkle in his eye, and no sooner had he finished reaching up to scratch his nose there was the peal of the doorbell.

 When someone dutifully opened the door they found a rather puzzled looking delivery man, taken rather sharply off his planned route by the map on his phone. Not only that, but his delivery bag was no longer full of pizza, replaced instead with multiple little boxes of specially selected nibbles.

   “Oh! My, well, isn’t that handy?”

[omniishambles]

THERA || @therapardalis continued from here! - - -

 Aziraphale smiled, pure joy lit up in his pale eyes as he looked at her surrounded by lovingly preserved pages. It was a rare honour for someone to be allowed time in Aziraphale’s bookshop to actually read the books. Or even to merely look at them before being cheerfully ushered out of the door with some excuse that he’d prepared and hearing the bolt slide closed behind them.

 Usually it was only Crowley, though he didn’t show any interest in reading. Thera was the only other who’d gained his permission, and more importantly, his trust. 

 He knew that she loved the books as dearly as he, and seeing as she was so willing to put up with his fussing- and at first, supervision- the angel was content to let her pore through whatever tome she liked.

   “Sharing, my dear, not spoiling.” He replied with a playful wag of his finger. The bow tie that Aziraphale was sporting today was a rather fetching shade of duck egg blue, and he set about straightening it in the nearby mirror while she saved her page. Tucked into his pocket was a matching handkerchief, and he attended to all the little details of his attire with great care.

   “And I do believe that a table has become available at The Ivy. Just this moment, in fact...what do you think?”

[omniishambles]

❝ The cheese is amazing. It melts in my mouth. And in my hands! ❞ (Az)

✧ BROOKLYN NINE - NINE SENTENCE PROMPTS!

   “My dear lady, how in Heaven have you gotten in such a state? Honestly! Here we are-”

 Aziraphale whipped a handkerchief from his pocket and took to cleaning her hands, as though she were a messy toddler. The cheese was just sticky, though, and he was making it rather worse by trying to wipe down her hands.

 With a surreptitious glance around, he covered her hand again with the handkerchief. When he removed it the cheese had miraculously disappeared.

   “Right. Much better, hm?”

[omniishambles]

THERA || @therapardalis continued from here! - - -

 Jonathan eyed the window again, leaning backwards so that he could peer out and properly assess the height. Ah. Yes. Right. No.

 He cleared his throat sheepishly and edged away from the window.

   “Yes, well, perhaps it’d be better to take the stairs, actually...” He conceded, casting a brief glance to the papyrus scroll still held tightly in his hand. “What am I supposed to do, Thera, just pop it back to where I found it? This could be worth a fortune!”

[omniishambles]

"Jonathan? I'm looking for a buyer for a statue of Min."

Random Starters || Accepting!

   “Min? Min...now, isn’t he the fellow with the-”

 Jonathan stopped abruptly, glancing up at Thera with a mixture of soft horror and suspicion as his brain filtered the information through that he’d been racking it for. 

 The God of Fertility. The one who was always depicted as having his- well.

 Was she mucking him about? Was she? It was bloody hard to tell with Thera and for the moment she seemed entirely sincere. He cleared his throat swiftly, loudly, reaching up to scratch the back of his head as though it was nothing. Nothing at all.

   “With the ah- ahem- yes, well, you know, of course, I’m sure- not to say that you’re into that sort of thing! But there’s some odd people about who go for it. Collecting, that is. Obviously.”

 He made a point of adjusting his tie- or rather of fiddling with it awkwardly and leaving it just as loose as it was a moment before- so he didn’t have to look at her.

   “Yes, I rather think I know someone who knows someone who’d be interested.”

[omniishambles]

♤ - slam a door shut before my muse can leave the room (probably Jonathan! XD)

Manhandling symbol starters || Accepting

   “Look, I’m not sticking around here waiting for a knife in my back, so if you don’t get out of the way I’ll- I’ll- bally well climb out of the window!” Jonathan said, trying to gather himself to his full height, chin raised stubbornly, but he couldn’t stop his eyes from darting to the window at his side and wondering just how high up they were, precisely.