#The one and only instance in which ‘do you know who I am’ is warranted and justified

[andivmg]

My experience with Luke (Punz)

CW: toxic relationship, racism, dubious consent

I know in the past i said that i would no longer speak about him publicly, and when talking about my experiences with abuse and emotional mistreatment i begged to keep it anonymous but after reflecting on this for a week and seeing so many incredibly smart and strong women tell their stories. they have given me the strength to say his name.

this is really scary to talk about because of the copious levels of harassment i have received from his fans in the past so if this spreads or gets out of hand i will simply log off.

If you read my last post, i nicknamed him 1.

So aside from everything i said there, there were a lot of things i didn’t include because they would’ve made it obvious that it was him and it could potentially backfire on me so, i’m very afraid to post this. but i’m going to do it scared anyway, because it’s not fair that he gets to just go and live his life worry-free as if he didn’t practically ruin mine.

Because I already made a very lengthy post about him, i won’t include everything i said last time to avoid being redundant but if i repeat myself, please bear with me.

In our year long relationship i had to endure emotional neglect, gaslighting, verbal abuse, one instance where there was dubious consent, and much more.

Starting off at the beginning of our relationship, that’s when i was getting copious amounts of hate and harassment from his fan base (warranted or not), he decided that our relationship must be kept private. he said it was to “protect” me from his fanbase when in reality it was to protect himself. it was so he wouldn’t get all the backlash i was getting. this is funny because one of the things i got called out for was saying the B slur (derogatory term used against mexicans/latinos). I won’t get into the nuances of if i could say it or not as a puertorican because that’s discourse that does not pertain to this specific situation. But you know who definitely can’t say it? A white boy from Massachusetts. When i was getting cancelled for this and getting thousands of tweets calling me names, he decided that was the perfect time to say “I mean you are a b***** aren’t you? my little b*****.” Now, he said this completely unprompted. I was in the process of writing my apology and he just said that. I tell you this because i immediately shut him down and told him that there was no universe in which it was okay for him to say that word and especially not one where he could just call me that. While i was reprimanding him, he was smiling and laughing. he apparently found it amusing to call me a slur. regardless, he gave me a half-assed apology and said he wouldn’t do it again. and he didn’t. but this wasn’t the only time he was weirdly racist to me. this was my first time being in an interracial relationship so i was led to believe that this was normal by all the white people around me at the time. But, sometimes my spanish accent would come out and he would make fun of me and the way i pronounced some words. He also refused to visit me in Puerto Rico when i lived there or come meet my family when i really wanted him to because he “didn’t like the heat” or “it’s dangerous there isn’t it?”. Once, while we were watching season 2 of Bridgerton, he implied that the Sharma sisters were “too dark” for him to be attracted to them. This hurt me because they are brown skinned girls. I am a brown skinned girl. Then this, combined with the fact that he told me once he wasn’t attracted to me made me feel like my skin color was unattractive. These are only a few examples i can think of at the moment, but i’m sure there were more. Our relationship ended in 2022 so some of my memory is a bit hazy. But, I do remember feeling inferior to him throughout the relationship because he was white and I was not. I chalk that up to all the micro aggressions i had to deal with because i had never felt that way around white people before.

Another thing i had to endure was him constantly making me feel like he was embarrassed to be with me. Because i was cancelled, he didn’t want to associate with me too much. He did defend me on multiple occasions, I’ll give him that. But, he only did it because his name was getting dragged in the mud along with mine. Excusing my actions made him look better for being around me. In reality he didn’t really care. Because he was such a big content creator and someone i looked up to professionally, I took his advice as law. He told me to tone down my personality, to keep a low profile, to change things about myself to be more palatable to his audience. The same audience that spoke about me like “The pussy can’t be that good punz please stop defending her”. So i changed a lot of things about myself and my content to better suit what his audience liked. He made me feel like if his audience liked me, he would be public about our relationship and stop hiding it. He told me the reason why he wanted to keep our relationship a secret was because he didn’t want to get hate for it. But this wasn’t true. On my 20th birthday he went to Las Vegas for a twitch rivals event. That night i asked to facetime him to say goodnight and he refused because he was at a hotel room with his friends and he didn’t want them to know that we were together. It was as if my mere presence or the utterance of my name was a source of embarrassment for him. And he didn’t let me forget it. It wasn’t just a public thing at that point. He didn’t want people to know we were together, period. This was devastating to me because I would talk to all my friends about him. I was so proud to be with him and I was just one more problem to him. He made me feel so small and insignificant just because his fans didn’t like me.

He would berate me a lot. Not just due to getting heat online, although he did do that a lot. But in general whenever we would get into an argument or a disagreement he would always call me names like annoying or weird or stupid. He would raise his voice at me if i did something he didn’t like and call me an idiot. And that really hurt, i felt like i couldn’t bring up anything or do anything without getting insulted. If I hadn’t seen him in a few days because he was too busy streaming and i asked to hang out he would call me needy, clingy, and annoying. Granted, he might not have been wrong, but that is not something you say to someone you claim to love. He also insulted me when i was in depressive episodes. I have BPD and at the time i was not being treated properly for it. So, I was all over the place emotionally and he was what i clung to for validation, reassurance, and love. I talked to him when we first started dating about my disorder and told him that if it seemed like something he couldn’t handle that he could opt out of the relationship. I guess he didn’t think it was that bad or something idk because whenever i had really bad depressive episodes, he would tell me I was too sad to hang out with. He said that my sadness was a burden to him. Which would be fair. But, once my mother had a conversation with him about me. She told him that i am someone who needs a lot of love and caring. She said that if he wasn’t willing to put in that kind of effort into a relationship to just leave me alone. He reassured her that he would be there for me no matter what. He told my mother that he would protect me and my heart. He did not. He took all the warnings I gave him and ignored them and then made me feel like I was the problem. And even worse, he would say that i was pretending to be sad to get his attention when he would neglect for days at a time.

There were also some smaller things like the fact that he made me feel really guilty whenever he would spend money on me. Also, he would be really mean about my eating habits. For context, i used to suffer from an eating disorder. I was anorexic and had a really unhealthy relationship with food during high school and my first year of uni. This relationship began when i was recovering from my ED. For me, eating was really hard. So i had certain comfort foods that, while sometimes unhealthy, at least it was something to eat when i didn’t feel like eating anything. He knew this. Yet, whenever i would crave some of these foods he would call me fat. Constantly told me I’d gain weight from eating all that junk food. Saying that to someone with an eating disorder is crazy. Other smaller things were that whenever I would post tiktoks where i was lip syncing or just looking good he would yell at me and say i was looking for attention. Same with Instagram or Twitter whenever i would post photos where I looked hot. He never planned out a single date for us. I would beg him to get me flowers and he did maybe once but i’ll get into that in a bit. He would make fun of me in front of his friends to make himself look better. He let his friends say really degrading things about me in his presence. For example, once when i was showering, i overheard him on a discord call with George and Sapnap and i heard George say “if you don’t go in the shower and have sex with Andi, i will”. Once, when i was really struggling with my legs (for those of you who don’t know, i have arthritis and it’s very painful. at the time i wasn’t diagnosed but i was in a lot of pain) I literally could not walk. I had to beg him to take me to the ER because i didn’t know what was wrong with me. He didn’t want to take me but eventually i convinced him, and while we were there all he did was complain about how long it was taking and that he would have rather been at home streaming. Whenever I would talk about my interests that i was excited about like shows or books he would be incredibly uninterested and say that those things were stupid and he didn’t want to hear about them. I know all of these seem very silly or superficial but cumulatively it was awful.

Now for arguably the most serious thing i’m going to talk about. I want to preface this by saying i am just telling my side of what happened. You can come to your own conclusions about this.

On April 25, 2022 it was our one year anniversary, and i had made a dinner reservation for us. I expected him to plan something throughout the day for us to do. He told me he was going to spend the whole day playing Valorant so I got upset and cancelled the reservation. After a very heated argument, we calmed down and i asked him to come over. He came over about an hour later with flowers and drinks (I was 20 at the time so I couldn’t buy the drinks myself). He brought Smirnoffs and Trulys. For context, I am a lightweight. I always have been. I literally get tipsy on half a cocktail. And that day, I hadn’t eaten anything because i was in distress over our argument. So we get to talking and drinking. I blacked out after my second Smirnoff. Apparently I drank 3 but I genuinely cannot remember anything after finishing the second one. The next morning i woke up naked in my bed. I woke him up and asked him “Luke, why am I naked?” and he said “Because you didn’t want to put your clothes back on.” When I clarified to him that that was not what I meant, he got defensive and said that he didn’t realize how drunk I was. He proceeded to tell me that I initiated sex with him and that i was very enthusiastic about it. He said he didn’t know i could black out on three smirnoffs. He made fun of me for being a lightweight and continued to make light of the situation. Then he mentioned that i fell off the bed at some point in the night and that it was funny how drunk I was. I then questioned him. Because if he thought that me tripping and falling off the bed because i was so drunk was funny, how did he not know that i was too drunk? He responded by saying that i fell off the bed only after we were done. That day I broke up with him. I’m still really confused about what happened that night. I don’t remember anything and all I have to go on is what he said to me. We were in a relationship at the time and he says he didn’t know how drunk I was so I’m not sure what to call what happened. A while after that day, his friend that hmu while we were broken up and I started talking again and i confided in him about that night. He told me to be careful saying things like that because they could get me into trouble. I spoke to some of our other friends about it and they told me it was no big deal and that it wasn’t his fault that he didn’t know how drunk I really was. Because I don’t remember, I have been led to believe that this is not a serious matter. You can think what you want, come to whatever conclusions you want. That is just my side of the story.

I want to add that I’m not proud of how I acted after the relationship ended. I felt really angry at all the shit he put me through and I guess a part of me wanted him to hurt even a quarter of how I did. So I started talking to his friend and got involved with him. This backfired on me because his friend ended up really hurting me too so ig i got my karma. But the thing that hurt the most is that because of what I did, some of our friends took his side in the break up. I was told that I did something terrible by getting involved with his friend that he was already insecure about and that he didn’t deserve that. These are the same friends who were witness to the dumpster fire of a relationship we had and all the things he did to me. They turned their backs on me because of this one thing I did. But stood by and watched as he treated me like garbage for over a year.

I will conclude this by saying that while this relationship has been “over and done with” for almost two years now, I carry a lot of trauma from it still. I still talk about him in therapy and have had to put in a lot of work to heal from what he did and i still cannot say that i am okay. I am very blessed to now have a patient and understanding partner who has helped me heal from that trauma and i just want to quickly thank him for that. Nobody deserves to go through what I did. While yes, it was a toxic relationship, and I had a part in that, it does not excuse all the awful things he said and did to me. This is my truth, thank you for taking the time to read it.

[cl0wncakez]

Say whatever you want about the black and white anime, but the one thing i will always stand by is that IRIS AND CILAN WERE NEVER PART OF THE PROBLEM!!!!

i did a full watch of the bw series a few weeks back, and the main 2 complaints i had about it were ash’s pokemon (he caught too many and most of them didn’t get enough screentime as a result) and team rocket (they were like barely there and didn’t even do the blasting off gag until the last season i think)

but for me the best parts of it were iris and cilan!!! i was kinda expecting them to be annoying cuz of all the hate they got, but i was pleasantly surprised at how enjoyable they were.

first off, i am the number 1 iris defender. all the posts i see that complain about her say the same thing everytime: “all iris does is say that ash is a little kid!”

well, as someone who’s binged the entire unova anime in like a week and a half, i can say that there is so much more to her. but for one, she doesn’t even say that ash is a kid as often as you might think. she mostly says it in the first few episodes when she first met ash. for the rest of the series, she’ll occasionally say it in passing, but it is not her one defining trait. while there are a few instances where i thought that it wasn’t warranted, there are plenty more times where ash was being big dummy and deserved it.

what people seem to forget about iris is that at the start of ash’s unova journey, iris is practically a new trainer. her axew is at most only a few weeks old, and her excadrill, while strong, hasn’t battled for who knows how long after being brutally defeated by drayden’s haxorous, leaving it in a state of shock. so obviously, she isn’t going to be the most experienced trainer out there.

iris grew up in the village of dragons, which as the name suggests, is a village inhabited by various dragon type pokemon. having spent her whole life surrounded by dragon types, iris has made it her dream to become a dragon type master. while at the beginning of her journey, she’s just with her axew, she over time has several encounters with dragon type pokemon, all of which help her better understand how to communicate with dragon types.

in one episode, she helped a druddigon out from a trap set by team rocket, while everyone else assumed it was rampaging out of anger. in another, the gang were helping out at a pokemon daycare, and in it was a deino, who was extremely shy. it’s trainer hadn’t returned for days after they said they would (the trainer ended up getting lost in a cave) and it was beginning to refuse to eat due to its anxiety. and what did iris do? she stayed with the deino the whole night, helping it relax in a place it wasn’t familiar with. it’s episodes like these that show that she’s not a one dimensional character, and like the rest of ash’s companions, she has character development.

but what helped fully flesh out her arc was when she caught her dragonite.

unlike axew, who was by her side from the beginning, she and dragonite did not get along immediately. dragonite was stubborn, wouldn’t listen to iris, and had its own way of battling. in order to become a dragon master, she would first have to understand dragonite. the trust that was built happened really slowly, but she did get there. by understanding a pokemon as troubled as her dragonite, iris would then be able to reach out and soothe her excadrill, making it confident enough to battle again, and help axew evolve after her journey with ash ended. and i think that was a solid way to end her arc until pokemon journeys, where offscreen, she fulfilled her dream as a dragon master and became the champion of unova.

now onto cilan.

cilan doesn’t get hated on nearly as much as iris, he’s more or less just forgotten about. so while i was expecting to hate iris when i first started watching, i had zero expectations on cilan. and tbh, i think he’s my favorite traveling companion?? if not than at least top 3.

cilan is the oldest of three siblings, and he first met ash and iris when ash came to battle at the triplet’s restaurant/gym. usually, the challenger only battles one of them, but ash was the first person to want to challenge all 3 brothers. when it was cilan’s turn to battle, he assumed that he would win due to him having the type advantage (ash choosing to battle with oshawott against cilan’s pansage)

well, ash won. and a few episodes later, cilan asked if he could join ash on his journey. the reason cilan wanted to come along was because he saw a new side to pokemon battling that he wanted to better understand.

something about cilan is that while he is a gym leader, he doubles as a pokemon connoisseur. a connoisseur is someone who makes critical judgements in fine arts or matters of taste. for cilan, he analyzes the bond between trainer and pokemon. and during his battle with ash, he evaluated his and oshawotts bond based on their battle. and he dug INTO ash, almost outright insulting his capabilities as a trainer, due to his assumptions from ash using a water type against a pansage.

but the thing is, cilan was wrong. in the end, oshawott ended up winning with ash’s strategy and support.

he fully expected to win, and was given an entirely new perspective of battling after seeing ash pull through. like cooking, pokemon battles aren’t just about type advantage and throwing moves out. it’s about thinking outside the box and trusting your pokemon, which ash accomplished by having oshawott use its scallchop to deflect a bullet seed attack. wanting to become a better trainer and connoisseur, cilan tagged along to gain a new understanding between trainer and pokemon.

and outside of his arc, cilan is just a genuinely fun character!!! did you know that along with being a pokemon connoisseur, this man is also a fishing, cooking, detective, judge, and film connoisseur??? and he can cook!! (EDIT: people are mentioning that he is also a train connoisseur!!! sorry :( i forgor)

cilan is shown to be more composed with his emotions than the previous traveling partners ash had. he also plays a mediator role whenever ash and iris bicker. and remember, cilan is the oldest sibling of 3 triplets, so he’s likely had to play mediator countless times if his brothers ever argued. ash and iris also seem to have a sibling-like bond, so their clashing was probably similar to what cilan faced before with cress and chili.

as i said, cilan is much more patient and gentleman-like. so the few moments where he genuinely loses his shit leaves a stronger impact.

the most notable example was with skyla, who instead of fulfilling her gym duties, played out battles in her head, and made her own judgements on if she could win a battle or not. this lead to challengers either being pushed away without a chance to battle, or given a gym badge without deserving it.

now cilan, who is a gym leader, sees this as a disgrace. it goes against everything a gym leader is supposed to do. skyla was lazy, arrogant, and wouldn’t do her job, which set him off. while he did lose against skyla, it was a big character moment to try and defend his honor as a gym leader.

overall, cilan is soooooo cool you guys don’t get him the way i do!!! i am the number 1 cilan fan!!!!

i think the reason people complain about iris and cilan more than any other companions ash had is because they were different.

iris had a completely different goal than everyone before her, it was a complete 180. she had zero interest in contests or performing, her dragon master dream was brand new in the anime. additionally, her relationship with ash was more like siblings than best friends, which likely made some viewers think their bickering was annoying.

and cilan. poor guy didn’t even have a chance from the start. not after brock was around for like a billion seasons.

overall, the black and white anime does have its problems, as does every pokemon anime. but leave iris and cilan out of it THEY ARE INNOCENT PARTIES :(

[frankingsteinery]

i’ve seen a lot of people in general agreement of the headcanon that victor is on the spectrum, but i’ve very rarely seen someone examine the why, and being the persnickety superfluous person that i am (and not being immune to projection myself) i thought i’d try my hand at it and break down his autistic traits!

disclaimer that this interpretation is speculative and is simply my unprofessional neurodivergent opinion + it’s based on contemporary understandings of psychology, which were not part of shelley's context, however autistic people have always existed even if there wasnt a word for it during that time period, etc etc. you know the drill

without further ado!

-- communication & social interaction

first and foremost, many autistics struggle with socialization. victor’s inclination to attach himself to a single friend (henry) and only talking to those inside of his close circle rather than forming many connections reflects this tendency, and he himself acknowledges his dislike and indifference of strangers. for example:

“It was my temper to avoid a crowd and to attach myself fervently to a few. I was indifferent, therefore, to my school-fellows in general; but I united myself in the bonds of the closest friendship to one among them”

“My life had hitherto been remarkably secluded and domestic, and this had given me invincible repugnance to new countenances… I believed myself totally unfitted for the company of strangers”

furthermore, he lacks relationship degradation (he does not require regular interaction or relationship maintenance to sustain a bond). during the creation process, he (presumably) goes months without writing to his family and friends, which clerval lectures him for:

“Very well, and very happy, only a little uneasy that they hear from you so seldom. By the by, I mean to lecture you a little upon their account myself."

yet upon his arrival at ingolstadt:

"...nothing could equal [his] delight on seeing Clerval."

victor also takes things literally several times and social nuances can fly over his head. he demonstrates this literalism when first meeting elizabeth:

"And when, on the morrow, she presented Elizabeth to me as her promised gift, I, with childish seriousness, interpreted her words literally and looked upon Elizabeth as mine"

and, of course, the infamous i will be with you on your wedding-night scene, when the creature obviously means he tends to harm elizabeth, not victor himself:

“It is well. I go; but remember, I shall be with you on your wedding-night.” I started forward and exclaimed, “Villain! Before you sign my death-warrant, be sure that you are yourself safe!"

he also goes nonverbal and groans/vocalizes instead of speaking when upset. there's several instances of this that i can recall (i believe another is with walton), but i could only find one, where elizabeth has to speak for him during their visit to justine:

"When she saw who it was, she approached me and said, “Dear sir, you are very kind to visit me; you, I hope, do not believe that I am guilty?” ... I could not answer. “No, Justine,” said Elizabeth"

and this is more of a sidenote but he gives walton every. minute. detail. of his story, including his childhood in-depth (which was not particularly relevant to the moral of victors tale, which was the whole reason he wound up sharing his story in the first place) which definitely feels like. Something. reminiscent of infodumping almost.

-- repetitive behaviors

victor shows both repetitive motions and repetitive language to such an extent that it'd be ridiculous to put them all here, particularly when he is distressed and agitated. some of these motions include clasping his hands, covering his face with his hands, and gnashing his teeth, which he does on walton's boat, after finding out about william's death, in his confrontation with the creature, during his time at the orkney islands, etc. the use of certain phrases/verbal repetition  include his many "great god!"s and "begone!"s, which he usually says in reaction to the creature or while grieving a loved one. these behaviors are arguably self-stimulatory (stimming) and done to cope with overwhelming, stressful situations.

-- fixations/spinterests

ths one's perhaps his most blatant characteristic. victor has a highly focused, intense interest, initially in in the workings of the world itself:

"It was the secrets of heaven and earth that I desired to learn... still my inquiries were directed to the metaphysical, or in its highest sense, the physical secrets of the world."

"The world was to me a secret, which I desired to discover;"

"I have described myself as always having been imbued with a fervent longing to penetrate the secrets of nature"

this is to the extent that his education is noticeably different from his peers, both in acceleration in the topic of his choice and neglect of other, more typical studies due to the intensity of this focus:

“I confess that neither the structure of languages, nor the code of governments, nor the politics of various states possessed attractions for me.”

“…but by some fatality the overthrow of these men disinclined me to pursue my accustomed studies.”

this early fixation eventually narrows into a special interest in ancient alchemy, after victor finds one of agrippa's works and a "new light seems to dawn upon [his] mind," upon which he proceeds to acquire all the works of agrippa and other authors:

"When I returned home my first care was to procure the whole works of this author, and afterwards of Paracelsus and Albertus Magnus. I read and studied the wild fancies of these writers with delight; they appeared to me treasures known to few besides myself"

this remains his special interest until he is a teenager, upon which, after finding out ancient alchemy has been disproven, he takes up mathematics until his arrival at ingolstadt. then, his interest shifts into a fixation on natural philosophy, particularly chemistry, which becomes his "sole occupation":

"He concluded with a panegyric upon modern chemistry, the terms of which I shall never forget... one by one the various keys were touched which formed the mechanism of my being; chord after chord was sounded, and soon my mind was filled with one thought, one conception, one purpose"

"I read with ardour those works, so full of genius and discrimination, which modern inquirers have written on these subjects... the stars often disappeared in the light of morning whilst I was yet engaged in my laboratory. As I applied so closely, it may be easily conceived that my progress was rapid. My ardour was indeed the astonishment of the students, and my proficiency that of the masters"

which, of course, develops into an interest in physiology and the structure of the human frame, which leads to his obsession over the secret of life, followed by being "thus engaged, heart and soul, in one pursuit" during the creation of the creature.

-- intense, volatile emotions; resistance to change

in general, victor is very emotionally demonstrative, and has difficulty managing these emotions. he also experiences quick fluctuations in emotion. this is something he has experienced since childhood, and is something he maintains as an adult, when he acknowledges that:

"My temper was sometimes violent…"

some examples of these shifts in emotion:

"My heart, which was before sorrowful, now swelled with something like joy..."

"Sometimes he commanded his countenance and tones and related the most horrible incidents with a tranquil voice, suppressing every mark of agitation; then, like a volcano bursting forth, his face would suddenly change to an expression of the wildest rage as he shrieked out imprecations on his persecutor"

hand in hand with his emotional dysregulation, he shows resistance to change and has strong reactions to this change. the most obvious example of this is during the animation of the creature:

"The different accidents of life are not so changeable as the feelings of human nature... but now that I had finished, the beauty of the dream vanished, and breathless horror and disgust filled my heart"

"Mingled with this horror, I felt the bitterness of disappointment; dreams that had been my food and pleasant rest for so long a space were now become a hell to me; and the change was so rapid, the overthrow so complete!"

but it also occurs when moving to ingolstadt, suggesting a discomfort with unfamilarity and a need for stability:

I threw myself into the chaise that was to convey me away and indulged in the most melancholy reflections. I, who had ever been surrounded by amiable companions, continually engaged in endeavouring to bestow mutual pleasure—I was now alone.

-- black-and-white thinking

this aspect is most clearly shown through the way victor thinks about, and drops and gains interests and relationships. he spends years studying ancient alchemy and it is his principle interest, and then drops it on a dime and suddenly looks upon this passion with contempt:

“By one of those caprices of the mind which we are perhaps most subject to in early youth, I at once gave up my former occupations, set down natural history and all its progeny as a deformed and abortive creation, and entertained the greatest disdain for a would-be science which could never even step within the threshold of real knowledge. In this mood of mind I betook myself to the mathematics and the branches of study appertaining to that science as being built upon secure foundations, and so worthy of my consideration”

later, he spends four years with his mind filled with "one thought, one conception, one purpose" studying the processes of life so intensely he forgoes adequate food, water and rest. this culminates in the creation and subsequent animation of the creature, which he again turns around and abandons this interest immediately, to the extent that he cannot bear to think of natural philosophy:

Ever since the fatal night, the end of my labours, and the beginning of my misfortunes, I had conceived a violent antipathy even to the name of natural philosophy.

it's a very polarized, all-or-nothing approach that is mirrored with his relationships, too, which he alternatedly neglects -- he cuts contact when he goes to ingolstadt but abruptly picks it up again when henry comes into his life; when the creature flees victor's apartment, victor treats it as if he never existed entirely; his family only comes to the center of the narrative again when he gets the letter from alphonse about william's murder, despite 2 years having been passed at ingolstadt, etc.

and finally;

-- low empathy

victor repeatedly focuses solely on his own internal emotional experience, and struggles to fully comprehend and understand the depth of feelings of others and respond with compassion in conventional ways. during justine's trial, for instance, he elevates his own suffering above justine's, even as she faces her literal execution:

I rushed out of the court in agony. The tortures of the accused did not equal mine; she was sustained by innocence, but the fangs of remorse tore my bosom and would not forgo their hold.

Despair! Who dared talk of that? The poor victim, who on the morrow was to pass the awful boundary between life and death, felt not, as I did, such deep and bitter agony. 

similarly, victor dismisses ernest's grief after william's death, he frames it in terms of how it affects himself -- telling ernest to "be more calm" to avoid causing his own discomfort:

Ernest began to weep as he said these words. “Do not,” said I, “welcome me thus; try to be more calm, that I may not be absolutely miserable the moment I enter my father’s house after so long an absence.

this detachment suggests not deliberate cruelty (victor very clearly loves his family, and he's said to be kind several times) but a limited capacity to process and respond to other's emotions. this is a detachment that extends to his views of the dead. during the creation of the creature, he refers to the corpses he utilizes as only "materials" instead of once having been fully-fledged human beings, and he does not contemplate the lives or dignity of the deceased.

aaaaaand thats it! thank you for indulging my. headcanon projection land. let me know what you all think...

[blairdii]

I just need to complain about this sorry if I am doing it here but Max’s fans are literally NOT being Max’s fans.

Dear allegedly “Max” fans, you are angry about your driver getting booed in front of a British crowd and a British media (that he criticised for an entire year, by the way, but that’s beyond the point) and now you are saying that FIA is amazing for having pointed out how unfair that is.

First of all, you were the same people that during the entire season firmly believed that the FIA was totally British biased because of Max’s penalty in Brazil (for context, in other races: Lando got an ancient penalty the race after, George’s win was taken away from him, Lewis got disqualified; but yes okay, British biased)

Second of all, you are agreeing with Jos for saying that Max won’t attend British events anymore due to the disrespect. Well, I have many things to say about this:

1. MAX IS A FUCKING ADULT, he is a step-dad and a soon to be dad, he doesn’t need his fucking father to talk in his place.

2. Max has said numerous times before that he doesn’t give a flying fuck about other people’s opinion. Why should you in his place when he is, again, A FUCKING ADULT

3. Okay, then, if you are literally so concerned about Max’s mental health, I guess you won’t call Lando a “baby” anymore for getting anxiety over death treats that YOU gave him for taking his comments completely out of context, and you won’t make fun anymore of George for doing what is in its rights as a driver and asking for the stewards to apply a penalty following the fucking rulebook

4. Max getting booed at the presentation (I honestly just saw it was directed to, you know, sexual assaulter on the loose Christian Horner but whatever) is suddenly very much important to the FIA. Okay then, where was the FIA when Max got all that backlash in Abu Dhabi 2021? Where was the FIA in all the Monza races from 2022 onwards (I am not even a Lestappen shipper but the only people who defended Max against the booing were just Charles in 2022 and Carlos in 2023 - I was there - JUST TO SAY)? Where was the FIA in Brazil and where was the FIA when Lando got booed in Zandvoort (since FIA is British biased then they should’ve defended him, no?)?

Be fucking for real and be fucking coherent

you see, what pisses me off about the entire thing, is how max fans are NOW concerned about the wellbeing of a driver. it didn't matter when they found the slightest, minute instance involving lando to microanalyse, misconstrue and then wield it against him. it didn't matter when george came out, said that he was literally being fucking threatened with assault, yet they did nothing but make max seem like the victim (so so ludicrous to me how someone could speak out but still be villainised-- i can't even imagine how george must've felt). it didn't matter when his fans attacked lewis after 2021. but a simple boo'ing kills them.

honestly, if that of all things, in all its justifiable glory, is what causes max, a grown man, to be absent in british events then lol, so fucking be it good riddance. not him reaping what he sowed after being disrespectful to the representing athletes of a nation, and then getting upset when said nation isn't okay with it 💀 say, what a shocker

it's so funny to me how the fia is backing this man up, making him look a whole lot stupid and then some for claiming that he had the 'wrong passport' in regards to the so-called bias, over something that, really, mildly inconvenienced him. look, it's time max saw the gravity of the repercussions. yes you've got 4 championships (i could be petty and say 3 tbh), but it doesn't warrant this other-worldly god complex. lewis isn't even on this level of egotistical and he has nearly double max has.

one thing i do love about this situation is how most of the f1 fandom is actually handing it to max. i saw, in a comment section, people telling him to be a 'man' and get over it, which is insaaaanely satisfying for me as a lando fan, because God truly knows how much 'lando's a baby' 'lando is mentally weak' i had to endure post-brazil alone, let alone for the latter part of the season.

hopefully now he's seeing that, contrary to his [probably] self-absorbed belief, the british don't rate him as much as he thought.

[tigsbitties]

scrumbles up to you 12 17 22 dialtown scrumbles away

(WARNING this got very long) gonna answer 22 in a different ask but

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them:

this one's kind of tricky. not because there aren't enough characters that don't get attention, but because i feel like every character that isn't randy, oliver, or norm is thoroughly lacking in fan content. It's just sort of a byproduct of having a smaller fandom. But it makes narrowing to just one kind of difficult. And if unpopular in this instance means disliked by the fandom at large, I can't rlly think of anyone? Theoroar maybe, but like i feel like thats warranted. If i ever start Theoroar posting you have to take me out back. So I don't know, I like pretty much all of Dialtown's extended cast. I know "everyone besides the male datables" (and having to lump Randy in that category is physically painful for me but it is the most popular perception of her character) is kind of a copout answer but it truly does feel that way.

I guess there's the dlc characters, who suffer the fate of "somewhat new characters in a game with a small fandom" so there's not rlly a whole lot of fanworks about them yet. which is a shame i think they're all delightful. (which by the way while typing i realized its been about 6 months since the dlc dropped good lord.) I know we don't get to see a whole lot of it, but the dynamic that everyone working at the plant has with each other is really sweet. A big stand out for me in this regard is Rebecca (who i am so glad dogman got peer pressured into adding into the route). Her relationship with Roger is especially both very sweet and also super interesting to me from the perspective of "enabling your friends because their flaws are similar to yours." I like how much the two of them being on the same wavelength is a double edged sword-- I don't think she has a single mean thing to say about him when she really should. (which, not really related to the question at hand but I do wanna mention how well Roger pulls off naivety as a character flaw. I feel like its easy to make a character like him come across as either super annoying and unreasonable or be too nice bc the author's refuses to have the character be actually flawed in a way that meaningfully effects the people around them. And he never falls into either of these traps.) I know dog's mentioned that a lot of why they get along so easily is because of their undiagnosed neurodivergencies-- which stands out to me because. yeah. yeah that's how it is so much of the time. virtually all the people closest to me are autistic and that was true long before i ever became aware of it. It's a very specific thing that means a lot to me.

And on her own I think she leaves a strong impression for her role as a really brief side character. Both in her actual scene and in Roger's description of the christmas party Like fuck man I only know so much about her but I care about her. I want her to be able to support herself and her kids-- i wanna know more about how she became a single parent in the first place. She's such a pleasant and funny character when you actually get to meet her the idea of her struggling to support her family makes me so sad. All of this without even mentioning how strong her visual design is. Even without the ascii art quirk, i think her outfit and color scheme are superrr visually appealing. And as much as im a fan of pink in a vaccum, the pivot to teal was 100% the right choice. I think if he had kept the "this character is pink because theyre the only girl" thing from dsaf i wouldve started eating my own fingers LMAO.

Umm. as for other characters that i rlly like that i think deserve more attention. I mentioned the factory workers but Fabron especially stands out to me I think he's really fucking funny. among other things. I've been on a journey with Fabron i cant detail here. much too embarrassing. Joe has also really grown on me. again super fucking funny character. why does he talk like that-- why is he the only character to comment about Gingi's lore relevant head. Love em to death. Omair is another dlc character i rlly enjoy he is disgustingly cute. The fucking heart hands sprite kills me it kills me dead. OH AND FUSCO. MAN FUSCO i dont have much to say for this one except i think he's hot. The fact no ones written about him and gingi bonking it crazy style is ridiculous. I realize i'm part of the problem but euhhh. far too much to do in busy life. Ill get around to it one day. Um who else. I'd be lying if I didnt mention Caroline but she's an offcsreen background character who me and griffin (hi griffin thank you for sending this ask) made up a bunch of shit about so it hardly feels like she counts but damn it i LIKE her. i think more people should make shit up about her and i think they gotta start having fun with it and not just kind include her vaguely in fear of having unethical yaoi. its free oc have fun! i hope dogman never thinks to come up with anything about her ever ever ever. I dont want a single appearance i dont even want one new additional character trait unless it somehow aligns with the hyper specific vision i've gotten attached to * bangs gavel*. last one MAN there needs to be more little billy. I think he was mildly funny in the base game but i wasnt really sold on him until the dlc he's so fucking funny there. One of the characters whose writing has improved the most between when the game was first written and now i think. The bit is so much better. he hacked a man.

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art:

again hard question too answer with the fandom being as small as it is. I just think it generally needs more diversity in the ecosystem-- especially in the fic department. Dialtown's ao3 tag is mostly just olandy, which like, i like olandy full stop. I dont really feel like doing the whole acting embarrassed about liking the popular fandom thing anymore. I've written about it and i will likely do so again. but I do really get burnt out from not having a lot else in the tag. which like, i will say theres been other stuff in there recently so i rlly shouldn't bitch too much. It's just a byproduct of having a slow moving tag. But i will say I'm itching for more stuff about Karen. I cant rlly complain about the fandom not drawing her enough, not bc its not a problem im just. not better. Not that i don't like her, far from it, im just AWFUL at drawing rectangles and boxes. which comprise the entirety of her head. Im sure you've noticed it by now ( every time i draw her her head is. so so crooked.) BUT i've written about her a handful of times (both in randy.mov stuff that isn't out yet and in wheel of wow.) i'm not. fully satisfied with how i write her yet? i think i struggle with her character voice some, something I think Dialtown has a really strong sense of across the board. I think i get in my own head about trying to recreate sometimes. I just think it would be nice if other ppl threw their hat in the ring more often. I wanna read about her more. which i should mention Mich's post about characterization because i think he hit the nail on the head when talking about her and things ppl tend to get wrong which i myself am not immune to.

[deviantartdramahub]

I don't know if anyone here can help me. I was one of the people featured in the video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtgBNwO7DOA and I saw at https://archive.ph/q9cFS that people can get content of them taken down, but the OP has a filter that automatically blocks most people in order to maintain his image as a universally supported individual, hence why the conflict there looks so uneven and why he explains his perspective by piling up excuses that even remotely support him.

Needless to say, as a result of this, though stuff is impossible to save anymore, I am interested to see where this goes, especially given what https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtgBNwO7DOA&lc=UgyxC_igBKV9Oz0gjoJ4AaABAg.ADSGwOZJ-BJADtjRIjD21- and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtgBNwO7DOA&lc=UgyxC_igBKV9Oz0gjoJ4AaABAg.ADSGwOZJ-BJADtjTSvtG-o and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtgBNwO7DOA&lc=UgyxC_igBKV9Oz0gjoJ4AaABAg.ADSGwOZJ-BJADu-GZ-USiH and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtgBNwO7DOA&lc=UgyxC_igBKV9Oz0gjoJ4AaABAg.ADSGwOZJ-BJADu20yrgS_E bring to mind.

I noticed the responses by the OP towards Terri not only make the claim she must absolutely be the OP's target in disguise, but also ignore and skip right over some of the things Terri mentioned.

One example of this includes the fact Terri addressed that the slur was apologized for and that the apology was accepted, something that was mentioned in the comments at https://www.tiktok.com/@shamanicsoulking/video/7422547788396825886 but with the comments now being visible in the footage which https://www.tiktok.com/@shamanicsoulking/video/7461799263459134751 shows, and the OP responds to that by saying "apologizing for being a transphobe when you were (quote) 'convinced' to do so is the epitome of an insincere apology", as if the validity of an apology is up to anyone else (she did not slight you, and she was not apologizing to you, the person who needed the apology was her friend who is still her friend). Sincerity is in the eye of the beholder; what I consider sincere and what you consider sincere may be different things, just like how what I consider table etiquette in my country might be different from what it polite to do during dinner at yours.

Another example is what she says about the claim of her having alts. She alludes to the error of this in full and the OP ignores this nuance and just repeats his old assertions verbatim but also goes into excuses for it which amount to nothing more than speculation fuel, as well as purposefully misinterprets this supposed alt's usage of first person reference as meaning that person is his target when it's clear it just means the person shared in the same thought. Their similar styles could be collaborative, to use an example of how it could happen if they were even the same style.

And people somehow don't see the massive logical hole in this in their response. Nobody is thinking "hmm, these very obvious contradictions by the OP might warrant skepticism towards them". The part about England I actually laughed at because the exact wording is "near Leicester" and there's more than one of those. "Your claims about your intentions don't matter" my ass.

It reminds me of that scene from season one of Pokémon where James is lying about his backstory and accidentally includes a part in it where he dies, and Jessie, Meowth, Ash, and Brock start crying before Misty yells "JAMES IS STANDING RIGHT HERE". Basically his advocates are akin to those four people who need info spoonfed to them like babies and happen to get lies fed to them because it's the first spoon to reach them.

While this scene from Pokémon works to explain the mindset of his advocates, it becomes a LITERAL analogy when talking about his (OP's) claims of her (his target) ban-evading in different places she was never banned from in the first place, which effing admins will tell you. Communities =/= instances =/= the site.

What's sad is how few Misties there are in society currently. There are Jessies, Meowths, Ashes, and Brocks absolutely everywhere, like it's the natural state of mind. Dare I say this is sadly what we call "neurotypical". Run through a movie theater and do what Mark Zuckerberg warned us about and yell "FIRE" without proof and more people would die of the panic than any actual threat, and the panic would allow everyone to become susceptible of theft, which is what is happening here. Theft of sensibilities.

Many of the claims made by the OP aren't even true. If you were to ask them for proof for all of them, he would only be able to provide anything even remotely resembling proof for some of them. I know this because I did so. One example is the death threat claim. Never happened.

Imagine a world where the same people who think last year's criminal of the year is innocent think speculation can allow someone to conclude the OP's target isn't.

Emphasis on the analogy considering the exaggerations, especially in the second response to Terri and in the claim about the gender of someone he thinks he "saw" after he stumbled upon Halloween silhouette clipart. Does he think insistence makes a case?

[herukaizaa]

Yugioh and "Destiny"

Meta-analysis that came to mind.

The Yugioh Anime loves to talk about fate and destiny. In fact it's a common trope among most Shounen Anime to have at least 1 character who talks about destiny, how things are "pre-determined" (Neji from Naruto comes to mind for me) and there's no way to change what destiny has set for you.

Aside for the terrible fact that Neji was right in his series' context, Yugioh should be heavily susceptible to this idea, because the way the card game works is with a set, shuffled deck; and while it may or may not shuffle midway, its outcomes are often "set in stone" the moment the decks have been shuffled.

Of course, this isn't the case.

The Yugioh Anime loves to bring these characters who are obsessed with the pre-determination of events, and break their belief apart with a character who seemingly does the impossible: offset their destiny. In some cases, this is outright not obeying their destiny, in others it's actively changing others' destiny.

And this is something prevalent to 3 of the 4 series that I have watched so far. And, it's worth talking about because I think that in general, this is a great message for the audience watching.

The notion that fate is not pre-determined, but is dependent on our actions even when things seem like they would go only one way, as an incredible way to motivate the audience to be independent. To not be afraid of what's been "foretold" to them. To take matters into their own hands and do their best, regardless of what anyone else says.

I love this message, and in Yugioh specifically, it's a very prevalent concept.

The first case study that appears with this idea is actually in Duel Monsters, in Seto Kaiba vs. Ishizu Ishtar.

This duel is actually predicted by Ishizu to every single accurate detail. This, by itself, allows Ishizu to alter "destiny" in real time; as, when she knows what cards Seto will have and play, she also knows how to counter them, based on the cards she herself will have in hand. She essentially turns this duel into one, big, elaborate duel puzzle. And ultimately, she almost achieves her victory. Up until the point where she should have won.

But as we all know, Seto Kaiba wins anyway. Because something at work, makes Seto doubt his choice to make an attack that he wouldn't know, spells his defeat. Now, barring the fact that this Duel was riddled with impossible plays, Seto does win fairly, offsetting his destiny by abstaining from using Obelisk, and instead sacrificing it for the Blue-Eyes White Dragon.

Ishizu had complete control over this entire Duel, as much as she could - but the Millenium Rod was an outside intereference, which she couldn't predict. Regardless of the mystical nature that lies behind the Millenium Items interacting with one another, fact is that her foreseen future failed her. Seto Kaiba refused to yield to the notion that his fate was sealed and destiny was known, down to the last second, even when hit with concrete proof that Ishizu does, in fact, know every card he has and plays.

Seto Kaiba's ego self-confidence and resilience was so great that, even with dumb chance, he happened to act against what destiny had already set for him.

I'm not even going to touch upon Sartorius (Saiou) in Yugioh GX, whose entire shtick is being a fortune-teller capable of predicting precise outcomes - and his proxy in Aster Phoenix (Edo) who talks about 'being unable to escape Destiny'; because their arcs in and of itself, warrant a wholeass meta analysis and post by itself.

Also at the time of writing this post, I have yet to finish the Society of Light's arc, so I'm missing out on the details; but, I am aware that Aster, who believe in Destiny, has his beliefs challenged and broken by Judai's eventual win against him - all in accordance to Sartorius' plan to make Aster stronger; which, is simultaneously a character breaking destiny in one instance, and playing according to destiny at the same time. Except, Sartorius eventually falls to Judai, too.

But the next example I want to talk about is from Yugioh ZEXAL, in Yuma Tsukumo vs. Cameron Clix (Hayami Shuta).

First I want to get an important note out the way -- both Cameron Clix and Hayami Shuta are extremely stupid names, and I can't believe this is what we got. Especially for someone who 'foresees the future'. Ugh.

For those of you who aren't familiar with the Yugioh ZEXAL initial plot, the NUMBERS cards are essentially powerful Xyz monsters who sometimes, offers their hosts (or victims) unique abilities - but also alter their personalities and make them malicious and power-drunk.

This is the case in this Duel, where Cameron is overtaken by Number 25: Force Focus, which lets him bring outcomes he imagines would happen into reality by snapping pictures of people and things with his camera, before they take place. Cameron uses this ability to snapshot his opponents' defeat, as well as the entire course of the Duel - down to precise card choice. (Sounds familiar?)

For the majority of the duel, things go about how you'd expect; Yuma plays exactly in the order Cameron 'orders' him to, up until and including the moment Yuma is about to Xyz into his own Number card. Expectantly, Cameron also controls the entire flow of the Duel up until that point;

But the moment Cameron's arrogance takes the better of him in him goading onto Yuma to Xyz summon, Yuma decides not to, and ends his turn, despite it being an objectively worse play.

At that moment, Cameron's premonition falls apart - and he panics. The duel eventually ends with Yuma's evolved ace card taking out Cameron's Number, offsetting the outcome Cameron pre-set.

Unlike with Seto vs. Ishizu's instance, there was no mystical power at work (even with Yuma being haunted by Astral taken into account). Yuma simply broke destiny by deciding not to play into it, knowing what his destiny is. It's a dumbed down version of the first instance of Destiny breaking, mostly because Cameron was foolish enough to tell Yuma exactly what he saw.

Yet, leave it to chance, belief and self-reliance to break through the notion, that everything is decided before it happens.

The takeaway from all examples given above, is that talks of Destiny, pre-determined outcomes and Fate, should not be a factor that stops you from doing what you want to do - or at least try to do it. And I think that's beautiful.

Who knows, maybe you're a Seto Kaiba, Judai Yuki or Yuma Tsukumo too. It's at least worth giving it a shot, isn't it?

So yeah. Motivational piece, don't be afraid to try, and make it your best efforts. You never truly know the outcome, unless you get there.

[italianpersonwithashippersheart]

IQIYI is a Chinese streaming app so of course they would label anything with LGBTQ content as restricted even when it’s not warranted. Nothing I’ve seen from We Are suggests that it will go any higher than pg-13. So everyone needs to lower their expectations for that PhumPeem scene. It will be the usual Gmmtv ‘spicy’ scene: AWKWARD! featuring light closed mouth kissing, hands interlocking, shirts come off and then the camera pans away. Only Friends was not the norm for them, and it even that show never hit DMD, MMY or BOC levels of spice. To be honest I don’t think a show like We Are needs it anyways, considering it’s been mostly fluffy and friendship vibes.

Ok first I want to say thank you for the ask and I do agree that it would be weird to have one spicy scene when their other sex scenes have been very mild. And the show overall doesn't really need it.

A couple of the BLs there did have 13+ and like I said in my post a lot of their dramas are legitamately rated 18+ and it does seem that @poetry-protest-pornography might have been correct with saying that anything with more then a couple of simple smooches might get the 18+ rating that said I do not know what their criteria is for Het shows I don't know if they have similar standars for those as well they might just have a different rating system.

I am not super comfortable with any type of blanket statements not just in this instance but at all.

Also I don't actually agree that GMMTV has only awkward sex scenes. Yes not every drama needs explicit sex scenes and yes I do think different standars might be at play here, but plenty of their shows have conveyed a lot with simple pan away scenes:

Moonlight Chicken and Bad Buddy for exemple.

Even Wandee Goodday right now which has made strides in term of sex rep, with references to Lube and 69ing and explicity asking for a partner to pay attention to their dick, and while it might not have been as high heat as other shows it certantely conveyed a lot about their sex life.

Not to mention the Warp Effect and 3 Will Be Free --- I also want to point out that I have been weirded out before that their het shows - or at at least non bl shows - can have open kink but none of their male relationship have ever had, if the puppy play in The Warp Effect had been gay that wouldn't have been allowed on YouTube no matter who owns what even with no nudity. The world is very cruel and hypocritical about queer media and obviously it isn't the creators fault.

Only Friends was higher heat for GMMTV but not the only thing there, even if you are correct nothing is as high heat as the other companies you mentioned.

That said obviously GMMTV being the disney of BLs like @bengiyo (I hope you don't mind the tag - it honestly a great way to describe what GMMTV has become) has refer to them probably will always tend more to pan away sex scenes in their bls.

Obviously you are not wrong for feeling that away about GMMTV sex scenes I just think there is plenty of good in there as well I personally liked the AouBoom scenes even without being super into the drama. Sometimes you don't vibe with specific type of chemestry I have been there. I think PondPhuwin were pretty amazing in Never Let Me Go chemestry and intimacy wise and their sex scene in NLMG was amazing.

[hesitationss]

fb+/meta or whatever is one severely unfunny joke. i know i am mostly a hater of social media, but i don't see how threads is going to be better for usability and reach. especially given how shit numbers are on IG (i get more noted "per capita" of followers on tumblr and twitter for untagged posts). i already made a small thread of zucc apps being shit which I'll copy paste here. i don't know how people are thinking threads is going to be better than any of the twitter alternatives when it's most likely the WORST option out there. anyway-

the reason why the other twit replacement apps aren't as insidious as threads (zucc/fb owned) should be obvious, but i'll list some things:

• infamously on zucc platforms you can get reported for saying "white people" which is why so many of us say yt now (a bit of poc social media history for u from the 2010s)

• private messages are sold/given to police no warrant: this could be anything used against you, could be protest info, where you've been, etc.

• right wing propaganda/misinfo is lucrative for facebook. this is something that heavily affects the global south btw.

• they lie about views and growth for business accounts to keep you on their platform. the case i know best is that they inflated college humor's analytics to compete w youtube. this resulted in so many businesses throwing money and labour at facebook w out much return.

also zucc sucks, he's pure evil... like u don't need me to get into *that* hopefully

addition:

omg 🙄 so shocked 🙄 that zucc is further propelling nazism on his latest app that has the exact same content moderation as all his other fucking apps lol 🙄 who would have guessed ?

Far-right figures, including Nazi supporters, anti-gay extremists, and white supremacists, are flocking to Threads (Media Matters)

Adding sources:

Point 1 - i can't find any formal articles that document the particular insidiousness of this, but I and many others who were in BIPOC only "leftbook" groups had either our accounts or groups we joined completely nerfed for using language against white people. hubs that had been for info dissemination, discussing theory, and organizing were marked as hate speech or reported by white reactionaries (even "leftist" ones)

Point 2 - Has been apparent since Michael Brown's murder by police in 2014 and the protests following, but was esp apparent in protest following George Floyd's murder and subsequent protests.

FBI trawled Facebook to arrest protesters for inciting riots, court records show (NBC News)

Point 3 Links - Facebook Admits It Was Used to Incite Violence in Myanmar (NY Times) | Whistleblower: Facebook is misleading the public on progress against hate speech, violence, misinformation (CBS) | How Facebook and Google fund global misinformation (MIT Tech Review)

Link for point 4 - Adam Conover talking about College Humor's inflated FB numbers (plus many other articles have been written about this)

more on the privacy shit - sex workers who have used fb AND ig on burner emails with fake names, had their emails and real names auto linked bcuz of how much a little bit of information goes. how fucked up is that.

How Facebook Outs Sex Workers

BTW i have been preaching this for years but if you want to learn why our internet is fucked up, learn about what happened with net neutrality cases in the US, and then later, SESTA FOSTA (primarily targetting sex workers but is the reason why everything is censored now). ppl online have been warning everyone about this for years, but you are just now experiencing the consequences. but again, nobody listens to things that target primarily sex workers.

plus from a functional standpoint, if you want to delete your threads account, your instagram is deleted as well. like it really doesn't seem worth it for people who are desperate to find the social media that will stick. i don't have anything nice to say about any of the other social medias except that some Mastodon instances do a great job at keeping nazi's out and using alt text, but the bar is extremely low and everybody else is even lower ^_^

[princesscolumbia]

I am convinced that a lot of management are addicted to crisis mode.

So, bear with me on a little background; there's studies (because I'm not the kind who bookmarks this stuff when I find it because I never think I'll need it until suddenly I do, I don't have the links, sorry. I welcome someone who has them to comment and correct me if necessary) that show that people can get addicted to crisis mode, that is, the mode your brain chemistry is in when you have something that could be life or death and obviously you wanna choose life.

There is nothing inherently wrong with crisis mode in humans. It can, in fact, be one of the most beneficial things you do in a situation where a crisis actually exists. Rent is due and someone stole your money, sideswiped in traffic and having to deal with all that, let alone the fallout. Anything that warrants a trip to the ER, etc. Crisis mode is your friend in any of those situations. It shoves aside all the mental and emotional clutter, often gives your energy a boost, juices your metabolism, etc.

Problem is, humans aren't meant to stay in crisis mode. It literally becomes too much of a good thing; sleep deprivation sets in, anxiety rules your life, you need calories because your system is burning them at a frantic rate. This is how you burn yourself out.

During the pandemic the company I work for had a record number of service requests come in from our clientele. Without giving too much out in the way of detail, the vast majority of the work was simply stuff that people were noticing needed done because they were now home 24/7 when they used to be gone from home 50+ hours per week. Some of it was legitimate emergencies that were going to cause damage to people or property, but a lot of it was just , "Hey, I noticed this, fix it."

My job was to go through the list of the service requests and get them scheduled or otherwise off the list. We had to go through all of them before the end of the day every day. Which is nearly impossible when you have 600 of them and 300 are being created every day.

The litany was familiar:

"We need to buckle down and just cram through this"

"All hands on deck"

"Mandatory overtime until it's done"

etc.

Now in that instance it made sense; record numbers, no increase in staffing, a hard limit on being able to add new people, hell, they couldn't even fire people because there was no way to know when they'd be replaced.

But then time dragged on, we started to get a handle on it, I got so good at my job I was not only handling the 600-900 service requests I was taking on some of the manager's tasks that happened to dovetail into my job duties as well.

But we kept getting demands from the VP suite to have everyone "buckle down" and "all hands on deck" and "five markets are behind again" and...

My team (I wasn't the leader, but we got really good at our jobs and so we wound up being a team) kept getting called in to troubleshoot other markets. We'd knock the workload down to a normal, manageable level (and I had numbers to prove they were manageable, so everyone knew I knew what I was talking about)...but within a couple weeks it was "all hands on deck because there's more work than xyz team can handle."

Finally I started asking, "What's the plan to stop being in crisis mode?"

I got the blankest of confused stares you have ever seen.

"We do things the way we do because we're in crisis mode, right?"

"...yeah?"

"So what's the plan to not be in crisis mode?"

"...I don't...understand?!"

So I stopped listening when the panicking and the screams for all hands on deck went out.

Sure, I did my job, but when people tried to push for me to work faster than I was (I was one of the consistently fastest workers in the company) or do x more work than I was supposed to do, I just asked what this was an emergency for. Is someone going to be injured or someone's property damaged if we don't do this thing right now? No? Okay, I'm going to do this over here, which is going to result in damage or injury if we don't take care of it.

Eventually, people learned to not act like everything was a crisis around me...because it wasn't. I just didn't put up with it.

To this day people will slip into crisis mode when they think something is an emergency. When I'm able to produce hard numbers to show that no, this isn't an emergency, we deal with this all the time, you're just perceiving an emergency because you're addicted to the rush of crisis mode, they have to step back and re-evaluate what they're doing. They usually don't like it, because they realize I'm right, and people hate when someone else is right about them being wrong.

please please please remember that no matter what your manager says, it is never that serious. unless you are literally performing surgery or defusing a bomb, it simply is not that serious

[witch-hazels-musings]

Hey there! I wasn't sure if this was something you're comfortable writing, so if not, feel free to skip! I couldn't find anything in your faq but I just wanted to make sure!

Can I request a reader who never really drinks getting a little tipsy after a particularly stressful day? Just acting kind of giggly and clingy to their s/o? Nothing dubious ofc just some fluff 🥰 for Diluc, Xiao and Kaeya?

^ This made me laugh. I am a LIGHTWEIGHT, so I tend to get drunk after like ... one beer - haha! Anyway - enjoy ;) 

Tipsy, Touchy

Warning -> flirty, touching, fluff, mentions of alcohol, and getting drunk

Includes: Diluc, Xiao, Kaeya

Character x GN Reader  |  Anthology

Diluc

He’s a bit shocked when you go beyond your normal one drink, in fact, he’s a little surprised at your demeanor in general - normally you only had a drink if the event warranted it, but today, you seemed to be throwing them back all on your own 

“Did something happen?” he asks you, his attention on the third glass you’ve begged him to pour. 

“Today,” you groan, your words already slurring a little, “was … not. good.” He can see the alcohol already making an impression on your skin. Your cheeks were flushed and you kept fussing with your hair, little strands making their own decisions as if in defiance of your touch. 

“Hmm, well don’t go overboard.” 

Once you reach your fourth drink, we gotta cut you off, too drunky. And worse, you were starting to get a little handsy with the people around you. You’d already given a few of the female patrons a hug goodbye, telling them you were the designated “send-off committee”

In fact, you were having a hard time keeping your hands to yourself especially when it came to Diluc. When he forcibly switched you from wine to water you grabbed onto his arm, or tried to convince him to lean in close so you could share with him a secret - he wouldn’t 

You thought everything was funny, and he often caught you giggling to yourself or chuckling after the small conversation you and he shared 

He wasn’t really on board with your ostentatious behavior, but he did enjoy seeing you smile in the grandiose way you were - unreserved and relentless 

As the evening beings to slow and patrons leave the bar, you were trying to work out a thought in your head. It had been floating around for a while and you weren’t doing a good job keeping it off your face. 

“Hey,” you finally speak up. You wait to finish your thought until Diluc looks at you. He’s been gathering the final glasses from the tables so he takes a bit to react to you. “Come here.” You beckon, uneasily, with your finger for him to walk closer to you. 

When he does, you wave him down so his face is close to yours. 

“You.” You point your finger at him, “are my favorite person.” There is a smirk on your face and playful energy in your eyes. 

He scoffs at you and tries to retreat but you grab his face in your hands, “Wait. Wait. Diluc Ragnvindr ... “ he’s so close to you, his face, his eyelashes, his lips … it’s too much and in defeat you let him go, dropping your head in your hands. “Ugh, you are much too attractive for me right now.” 

“You are a lot of things right now.” You peek your eyes out from over your arms and see him rubbing the back of his neck, his head turned to the side. There is no doubt in your mind he is blushing. 

“You’re blushing!” you shout. The excitement of his reaction is too much to handle. 

“Shut up.” He tosses a towel your way and disappears into the back office. 

Diluc makes a mental note to not let you drink that much in public again, not only is he worried you might do something dumb, but he worries how he will keep his composure

Xiao

Xiao would have no idea what to do with alcohol. He doesn’t touch the stuff, so he wouldn’t really know the common behaviors of inebriated people 

He’d probably take whatever you were drinking and dump it out in front of you the drunker you became - he could barely handle normal humans, let alone a drunk one 

“What are you drinking anyway?” He looks at the bottle, turning it over in his hands. 

“I don’t know, I picked it up on the way out here.” You rub your hands over your face, the wine hasn’t fully hit you but you know with the amount you drank it’s only a matter of time. 

“Is it normal for humans to drink so much, all at once?” 

“Meh, maybe? Today was the worst though, so I’m giving myself permission.” 

It’s hard to tell if he would have any reaction to your tipsy behavior other than being exhausted by it

The way you laugh at things, that to him, aren’t funny or how you try to ask him really silly questions about things he wouldn’t know anything about 

Xiao is prickly, so you’d have to push through a lot of spikes to get to the gentle core he’s given you flashes of, so don’t get offended if he reacts to your clingy-ness in an irritating way 

He just doesn’t let people in very easily, and even though you two are together, and you’ve been physical before, this level of touch might be overstimulating for him 

You look at him from the floor of the inn. He is sitting on a pillow with his eyes closed. There were many nights you spent with him where you just fit yourselves into each other's space, like pieces of a puzzle nestled tightly together. He looked so regal, and you wondered how he would act if you poked at him. 

Carefully, you crawled your way over to him with wobbly limbs. When you got close enough you whispered his name. 

“Xiao…” He opened his eyes and is startled by how close your face is to him. His arms launched to his sides to steady himself as he leaned back away from your proximity. The reaction made you laugh.

“What?” 

“Nothing, I just wanted to get closer to you.” you desperately want to touch him: his cheeks, his forehead, his collarbone, his arms and hands, you wanted to touch them all. The alcohol emboldened you. You scoot closer to him, your sides practically touching, and, in an instant, you wrap your arms around his. The grip you have is possessive. 

He sighs but doesn’t push you away. So you tread onward. You slide behind him and wrap your arms around his chest, each of your legs on either side of him Rubbing your face against his back you breathe him in, he smells like rain after a thunderstorm. 

“I like you.” You place a kiss on his exposed shoulder before resting your cheek against him. 

It’s quiet for a time, all you hear is his beating heart and slow breaths. You don’t expect him to answer you, or say anything, you know he likes you by the way he lets you cling to him like this. That’s all you’ll ever need him to say. 

“Are you always going to be this clingy when you drink?” the question breaks the silence. 

“Mm, possibly, I don’t normally drink this much. Why.” You return his question with your own, slightly tilting his body to the side so you can strain your head to look at his face. 

“No reason.” Even in the dim lighting, you can see the blush on his face. 

Kaeya

Kaeya finds your behavior hilarious. He’d be so enamored with the way you were acting and amazed it happens with only a few drinks of alcohol in you

“You’re putting those away,” he’d muse over his own beverage. 

“Well,” you’d say as you empty yet another glass. “Today sucked! So i’m drowning my stress in sweet, sweet alcohol.” 

“Cheers to that!” 

When you laugh he melts, when you giggle he nearly passes out, and he’s having a hard time not fainting right now. Everything he says to you sends you into a fit of laughter and he just can’t stop himself - he’s obsessed with you and when he can see something new that he’s never noticed before he is filled with pride 

For instance, he didn’t know that when you laugh when drinking that you shield your eyes and nose and let out breathless laughter. He didn’t know that when you had several drinks you started to get louder and louder - which may have annoyed others, but he found it endearing

“... and after finishing the bottle he passed out for three whole days. And that is why our aloof bar owner doesn’t drink.” You can’t help but laugh, you’ve heard this story already but it makes you chuckle every single time. 

“Kaeya, how many times are you going to tell that story…” Diluc warns from behind the counter, his hands dangerously wrapped around the neck of a wine bottle. 

“Oh, come on. Look at how happy it’s made them.” 

“I’m cutting you both off.” 

“Hey!” Even with the cap on your drinking for the night, you couldn’t stifle your laughter. 

Normally, Kaeya is the overly touchy one. His hands cannot keep themselves from your tempting body. So when you cling to him he finds the action rather refreshing 

Wrapping your arms around his, leaning your head on his shoulder or digging it into his arm. Scooting closer to him, practically sitting on his lap, he finds it all a riot - don’t be shocked if he helps you into a comfortable position on or between his legs 

“Kaeya,” you look at him, your head bobbing around, your cheeks the color of pomegranates, and your hair falling out of place. 

“Yes, lovely?” He helps steady you, a possessive hand wrapping around your lower back and his other moving from your shoulder or lower arm, whichever one needs the most support. 

You giggle, and the sound pulls at his heart, “Do you know that you’re handsome? Like, really, really handsome.” 

“I’m glad you think so.” 

“No, listen, it’s kinda ridiculous how attractive you are. LIKE … WhO do you think you are with this face?? hmmM?” You wave your hand in front of him as if to drive home your point. You aren’t sure what answer you wanted from him, but his laughter seems satisfactory enough and you join in shortly after. 

He finds everything you do to be adorable, but multiplied by ten when you start drinking - he will always make sure you have a good time, and as long as you are safe and happy he will be there to join in on the fun

[umbralrosa]

@kiigan

玫:

He has her attention — which can be a good or bad thing, depending on who you ask and what her mood is. She's given the impression that he thinks she's a deity, and some have called her this over the course of her long life. Predominantly for how she looks and speaks, she's too outlandish, but also in part that she is someone who stays around far longer than one should. Human beings don't live forever, and she certainly gives this impression.

He is by far the most interesting of his entire group. Not everyone has such an extensive and expanded mindset.

"You seem to think me godlike, or of such status" she utters with some mild amusement, but it's far more flat and veiled than as animated as one may be. "I am not so, nor do I believe in such things. I merely respect nature as she has cultivated it." The clarification is necessary. She's not a god. She is human, started out as such... Her circumstances were merely different, and set for her. An ironic thing, given his question about fate and roles.

"Information is power, as I've stated. Such a thing is a key to many doors, and I have been alive for far too long to have seen majority of what lies beyond them: Greed, power, and domination. A hand could count the instances which it is used for their communities, families — the betterment of those around them than ill-intention... In some way, I myself am responsible for such an outcome. I swayed a moment in life, an experience, or aided destruction of another." She explains this somewhat vaguely. Like she doesn't want to say too much, give any ideas. A testament to what she just said. She's responsible for giving someone a proverbial key to a door yet opened. She's not a god for doing so. It's just moral obligation — ethical, in some cases.

"Because of this — depending on the magnitude of information given — if it should be something so altering that it defies nature or disrupts balance in this world, I am responsible to correct such actions... The only exemptions would be the ignorant and oblivious, as they do not know what was said and given. The individual who asked for knowledge and misused it will simply be added to my garden, nothing more."

Her violet eyes settle on him again, with a dark existential dullness. Maybe it's her exhaustion with life, this same song and dance she's experienced and endured for centuries. Perhaps it's arrogance that she looks an Uchiha in the eye, especially with such eyes active that would typically warrant a person to be wary. It's another note to perhaps her strength, her disregard for herself and this uncaring demeanor for the typical. She is not to be trifled with. It's a quiet reminder.

"I am not kind, nor merciful. I exist as any other natural disaster... To live or die is for them to decide, and if they want to make a fool of themselves and meander with something they don't understand, I have no issues making an example of them."

[lunarblazes]

I don't necessarily disagree with your take about mcc's ace race but I think it's just not true saying the only reason dteam is still in is the popularity. mcc people like these people!! people like to team with the dteam and have fun when they do! it is not that weird to be upset when you think youve won and then you didn't. sapnap did not complain much at all.

I think people who complain about funneling in dodgebolt (and do so in chat!) are whiny too but I not gonna make a post about it saying that mcc needs to have an intervention??

also some genuine advice do not let twitter drama affect your mcc experience.

hi!! okay this is the kind of opposing opinion i can work with, thank you anon! i respect and genuinely appreciate your response here, and i’ll take this opportunity to further clarify some things.

to your first point—you’re right! they’re not ONLY here because of their fans and it was wrong of me to make that exaggerated assumption in my post. that’s on me. i try very hard not to assume anything about ccs personal friendships or relationships with one another, and i’m sorry i did that there. HOWEVER, i feel as though i am still warranted in being upset with dream and sapnap specifically for their conduct about the ace race decision and other things in the event. for instance, the streamer i was watching was smallishbeans, who got sixth in the first run and dropped ten places in the redo. he was not in favor of a redo but acknowledged it would be the most fair thing to do. he was upset at his score drop, but never once did he argue directly with noxcrew’s choice, MUCH less in the in-game chat. because he’s an adult with manners. being upset because you got a lower score in the redo of the game is completely understandable and that’s not what i’m frustrated about. my frustrations stem from the fact that dream continues challenging and being snarky with the admins in chat when he is not and never has been in the position to make these decisions for an event. nobody else does this. everyone else is simply frustrated and moves on. nobody else feels the need to be an asshole like dream does. now, i cannot remember what sapnap did during ace race in particular, my issue is decidedly more with his behavior about build mart, but my point stands with him as well. he constantly spams messages against build mart to the point where the bit has completely run dry and it’s genuinely annoying to me. people don’t constantly reply to mcc tweets asking them to remove battle box even though it’s a few participants’ least favorite game and that’s because those participants aren’t fucking obnoxious about it. both of them need to grow the fuck up and learn how to talk to people normally.

2) funneling. i admittedly have a bit of bias here because i think funneling is fucking stupid (what a shocker, i doubt you could have gleaned that from anything i’ve ever said on this blog lol), especially with what the yellow yaks did. to me, it makes the event predictable and shows a lack of faith in your team and the fact that dream does it every fucking event no matter who he’s with gets boring as hell. the other participants seem to share my belief and it’s literally not fun to watch if they have such poor sportsmanship they can’t handle giving someone else an arrow for ten seconds, especially if those people are BADBOYHALO AND SKEPPY, WHO ARE NOT BAD SHOTS BY ANY MEANS. i don’t recall anyone saying bad things about funneling in chat, but i wasn’t fully watching dodgebolt this time, so there could have been some comments. regardless, as i’ve said before, it’s not poor sportsmanship to voice annoyances about the event. the difference between frustration and targeting hate is both patterned behavior and direct challenging, both of which dream and sapnap have done. fruitberries thinks funneling is stupid and i know this because he said it on stream. you know what i didn’t do? send hate to dream about it on twitter. i didn’t even mention funneling in my first post even though i dislike it. i wanted to focus solely on direct disrespect. while i can see your point about supposed bad sportsmanship from anti-funneling participants, i posit that it doesn’t have the same horrid effects that dream’s comments do at all.

3) this is some great advice, seriously! i know that some people do struggle with this and it’s truly something to keep in mind. however, twitter drama is not ruining my mcc experience—the behavior of these actual participants is. i have had multiple people in the last 24 hours tell me that they cannot watch mcc anymore because they know the dteam will throw a fit and it’ll be horrible to watch. if this was just twitter drama, i would filter it and move on. but because it is literal, actual behavior from literal, actual participants during the literal, actual event, there is no way i can avoid it. it’s exhausting and the worst constant of mcc. things can and should change, whether that’s a shape up in behavior or a removal.

[imaginationbeyondreality]

So, what’s new?

These past few weeks have been hectic. I feel so tired but for some strange reason, I do not feel sleepy. Well, maybe it’s because the board exam is pretty much just around the corner. So, I don't have the time to dillydally.

This year has been rough for me and… for my baby. I know she’s kinda old. We’ve been together for like seven years. And maybe, it’s about time she shows how much she has aged.

For starters, I do not even remember when was the last time I had her washed. Yes. Yes. It’s so irresponsible of me but I just don’t have the time these past few months.

I had to pay someone for a scratch (about a foot long) I caused in her car when I was leaving the parking lot. I’m not sure actually if I was the one who scratched her car but the security guard insisted. Though, what baffles me is that I have no scratch in mine. I mean, if I was the one who caused it should my car have a paint transfer of some sort? I don’t know. But because of this incident, I now have trust issues with security guards.

I stupidly left my car with the engine on for 20 hours. That’s almost a day! I wasted my fuel which I tanked up that day. Seriously, how stupid can I get?

For the first time in seven years, I had to visit a vulcanizing shop. I was alone and scared and skeptical. I mean. Is he doing the right thing or he’s just after sales? Silly me.

I had a mishap with a motorcycle, twice actually. Different instances. Alhamdulillah, no one got hurt. So yeah, I have new scratches on both sides.

One of my brake bulbs busted last year and now, two of them are not working. Back then, I had a hard time finding a replacement in CdeO so I gave up. But I realized, I have to replace it. So we searched again in IC but we still got no luck. We ended up asking someone to buy them in Manila and get them shipped here. So, yes. I got new bulbs but to my disappointment, both brake bulbs just stopped working. I think something is wrong with the wiring. And it’s definitely something that I cannot solve.

Next. Three of the warning lights on my dashboard are now persistently illuminated. I read my manual, did some research, and I found out that those warning lights are kinda serious and warrant a visit to an auto shop.

And just recently, my windshield cracked. I don’t know how and why, but it happened. I felt so sad and sorry and stupid. ‘Coz I think I am the only one who got her windshield cracked for no apparent reason. I did not see any other damage exteriorly, just the crack. Something might have hit it. Accidentally or not? I don’t know. Or did it crack because of too much heat? Or because she’s worn out? Well, I can’t tell.

But you know what’s funny? I religiously hang my sunshade cover every time I park and leave my car out. But strangely that day, I did not. Looking back, I remember having the urge to hang the sunshade cover before I leave but I dismissed the idea telling myself that I will leave early the next day so I don’t have to do it. But I did not leave the next day. I did not! And it totally slipped my mind that I did not hang the sunshade cover. So I basically left my car out in the scorching sun for two days. When I got in my car the next day, I did not notice the crack. I turned on my AC, as usual, and lowered the temperature. And it somehow occurred to me at that time that if I set the temperature too low, will my windshield break? And, AGAIN, I dismissed the idea. ‘Coz it’s what I’ve been doing for years. I turn my AC on immediately. I only noticed the crack when I was outside the compound. Wait. Did I really notice it when I was out or was it when I turned my AC on? Did something fall and cracked the windshield when I left the car to close the gate? Ugh. I don’t know. My memories are playing tricks on me. They’re confusing me.

I can’t help myself but be bothered. I keep on thinking that I was the one who made it happen. It’s my fault. I feel stupid and irresponsible and broke. ‘Coz the repair, you know, would definitely cost a lot. I know it’s wrong of me to wallow in sadness, but I couldn’t help it. I have this feeling that none of these could have happened if I was careful. I might have prevented it had I listened to my inner self. But really. Whom am I kidding? They are bound to happen. They happened for a reason.

Ya Allah. Grant me wisdom and strength.

Sigh.

[for-the-writing-artist]

I'm going to need some explanation as to why you think anyone would or should ever entertain telling the truth under either of the examples I've given. Unless I've misunderstood something here; I'm genuinely having trouble seeing what point you're making with this.

Alright. In case it was not clear, in your example you ask why you should ask forgiveness for something you do not think is wrong ─ lying. I counter that in the same example, to not lie imputes you a greater wrong. In a sense, I am agreeing with you, as was my intention with the examples above.

I hold that God can be cut and dry, that lying is wrong, and I also recognize when circumstances give reason for a lie, due to nuance/ambiguity of human situations. Hopefully this clears things up.

Definitions are descriptive, not prescriptive. That's one definition you can take for morality, sure. But morality is also the process by which we determine which actions are right or wrong. And it's all a social construct, subject to a myriad of factors and it often changes as we evolve and adapt to new situations.

Well, almost? Yes, human morality will change as often as we change, and that's all we can agree on.

Society's moral standard varied a lot! Human sacrifices were considered acceptable, women's rights, and inability to vote sparked the suffragette, and then later the feminist movement. The criminal justice system was created, along with law enforcement, to penalize even small things like, whether you are wearing a seat belt while driving.

But what is right or wrong does not change, because ─ and this is what I believe ─ society's construct of what currently is moral or immoral do not have the power to define right or wrong.

Nothing stated above tells me if [x] is right or wrong, so how can I subscribe to such volatile teachings, when today I am allowed to do x thing, and tomorrow I may not? Which, to me, doesn't seem like it denies the existence of a higher being? Argh, anyway.

*Enter God and Divinity, and why it makes more sense to have an eternal status of good (or moral) value ─ that exist regardless of our existence*

“Exists” is a word I'm hesitant to use here. Some people think that there's some intangible, ethereal abstract that is somehow present in the universe or whatever and I'm not comfortable adopting that without evidential warrant. Like I said, it's a social construct and subject to change, and if we imagine a universe with no thinking agents there could be no morality there. It exists as a philosophical concept, a brain pattern that we use to make decisions. By my definition, morally good actions promote well-being and reduce harm, but morality does not and cannot “do” anything on its own, instead needing variable input in order to do any kind of work.

Hmm, I get what you're saying, but even in the absence of our existence, two plus two would still equal four. It is an absolute truth, and, in the same way, morality (right) or immorality (wrong) transcend our existence. Lest, this is what I believe in. We don't need to exist for murder to be wrong.

You are aware that there are over 600 commandments in the Bible, right? I don't think I'm out of line in thinking that every time god says to do something it's meant to be a command. Certainly if you don't think so I could find any number of Christians who do, so I'd have yet another instance of not knowing who's right.

Slavery was very common in antiquity. The entire Eastern world at one point owned slaves. That is a fact. It was also very common to have multiple wives, something we know God abhors ─ yet it is written in the laws not only ways a man may treat his cohort of wives, but also how he can divorce one. Something God also abhors.

And you will, I guarantee you, find people calling themselves Christians out there that do believe polygamy is endorsed by God. It doesn't make them right.

And you know that slavery is wrong, but to my understanding the Bible fails to ever make that statement, so how did you come by that awareness? The god described by the Bible sure seems to be a fan. He's infallible, but you disagree with these passages. Why are you more moral than the perfect being you worship?

There are laws on how to treat slaves (Ex 21:1-2, 16, 26-27, Dt 23-15-16). There is also detailed punishment for whomever is found trafficking slaves (Ex 21:16, Dt 24:7).

With this latter part, along with the endorsements in 1 Timothy 1:10 and Galatians 3:28, coupled with the two greatest commandments, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” ─ Mark 12:30-31

The golden rule, “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” ─ Matthew 7:12-14, and God himself freeing the people of Israel from the slavery they endured in Egypt (Ex 1:8-13) ─ you can only claim that if you really want it to be true, somehow.

Christianity exhorts us to be freed from spiritual bondage, and it is in direct opposition to that, to condone someone be physically enslaved. If God wants us spiritually free of sin, He cannot want us physically enslaved to someone else.

And the irony, is that the Bible was used by both, to condemn and endorse slavery. One used the exact chapter you quote to claim God approved of slavery. The other used it to prove that God holds all lives in equal value, and that one is not inferior to another. (Galatians 3:28, Acts 17:26, Acts 10:34-35).

And this inferiority, God has never decreed.

So I've addressed your points, and the points of other people, and so far all we've done is looked at what people believe. A lot of claims, but I'd like to re-center the conversation around how anyone can show any of this to be true. Why do you believe? Why don't you believe in any of the other gods who are proposed to exist (I mean Krishna sounds like kind of a cool guy maybe...)? And why should I be convinced of any of it? I can tell you all day about why I'd refuse to worship a deity that commands genocide and slavery but we're still in the realm of hypotheticals if all you've got to stand on is a book full of unsubstantiated claims.

Indeed, this could turn into a back and forth on how God does not command slavery or genocide; and we could look at the history of things, like how the Bible has been used both in support and condemnation of slavery ─ and it would be good to research this part of history.

And none of it will answer if He is real, or why He is real, or how it should convince you. I don't think I came to argue about that.

I get that the burden of proof lies on me, and I would be genuinely interested in your reasons for why God isn't real. But a discussion can only go so far in unequal footing.

And, if by some miracle, it is proven without a shadow of doubt that God is real, and all your answers and reasons for disbelief disproved ─ would you acquiesce? Would you believe then?

Something is. Something exists that is higher than me, or you. It could be this Krishna, it could be God. But I cannot argue in favor of this, if you believe that Nothing exists (really weird, as nothing is the absence of something). I would need to disprove this Nothing to then argue in favor of Something.

@wayward-wren that other post was getting to be a chore to scroll through, so I hope you don't mind that I'm moving my responses to a new one. If I've missed something you'd really like a response to, just remind me about it and I'll do my best. I think I've pulled everything that I wanted to go over here.

> Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 1:22-23  "For Jews demand signs and Greeks seek wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified, a stumbling block to Jews and folly to Gentiles..." You're not alone in your skepticism, and that's why we have to rely on God.

I understand why you think that way, but my skepticism means that I can't rely on god. I can't appeal to something that hasn't met its burden of proof in order to explain other things that haven't met their burden of proof either. This just doesn't work, it's not a logical conclusion to make. In the absence of evidence for the claims, I must reject them until they can be shown to be true.

> Where does your morality come from? You can't claim God is evil without defining what evil is. Is evil hurting others? Then being a personal trainer would be evil, because exercise hurts.

This is hard to explain briefly. I mean, philosophers have been trying to nail down morality for about as long as all of written history. But what we see is that morality is an ever shifting social construct. There are things that we understand now to be morally bad which were seen as good or neutral in the past. And in the future I'm sure there are things we won't look upon favorably that are totally fine today.

Morality can't exist in a vacuum, so it needs a goal in order to sort of ground it. For me, it starts simply; the goal is to promote human flourishing and well-being while mitigating as much harm and suffering as possible. The evidence that this is a worthwhile goal is this: we, and even other mammalian species, have an awareness that individual suffering diminishes the chances of group survival, so in order to make sure we all flourish we ought to care for one another.

So I really don't believe in evil, though this might be a semantic point. With respect to my goal stated above, how can I see any moral value to a commandment that tells me that people should be used as property? This degrades and dehumanizes both subject and master, maybe even irreparably, and does nothing to promote human flourishing.

And this view is capable of accounting for nuance, whereas "don't look at someone and think they're sexy," is a harsh, black and white statement that amounts to thought crime, which is something that has no use other than to mentally dominate people and make them subservient. And for what? Thoughts like this cause no harm as long as the thought doesn't lead to any external, non-consensual action, and most of the time if not all, they're completely involuntary. It's control for the sake of control without even approaching being a moral value.

The nuance comes in as well with your personal trainer example, though I'd argue that the trainer is not harming directly but guiding a person through a process that will indeed cause some self harm, but with a positive goal. It's contractual and the recipient knows that the slight harm is to their benefit. Similarly, we consent to surgery which can be very risky harm, with the goal of becoming well. Absolute, black and white commands don't leave room for this and should ultimately be rejected in favor of a reasoned approach that takes all available information into account.

If god commands us not to lie, did he know that in 1930's Germany a great number of compassionate people, often devoted believers, would hide people in their homes who were taking refuge from a fascist regime? Did he expect those people who lied to the officers banging at their door, in order to protect innocent lives, to beg his forgiveness for misleading men with murder and torture in their minds? If my friend is in an abusive relationship and they've come to my place to call for help, and their enraged partner comes to me asking where my friend is, what forgiveness do I need for telling them that my friend isn't there? I've done no wrong, but this imperative given with no caveats or grey areas allowed brands me with the title of sinner and I object. Real life application of morality is rarely, if ever, as cut and dry as these ancient edicts would imply.

> If there is a God who created the world and is so much more powerful than the beings He created, why can't he make the rules?

I don't think that there is a god, or that the world was created, but to entertain the hypothetical; of course, I'd have no choice but to accept that those are the rules, but I'd also have no obligation to follow the rules if I have the free will you say I do. I don't necessarily believe in free will, but I would never follow an immoral command. If a god told me to go and do a genocide on the Canaanites or to keep slaves, for example, I would have all the information I needed to conclude that this god is a tyrant and undeserving of obedience or worship. I'd be damned, but my conscience would be clear.

> The thing with Christianity, is it's a story of God reaching to man. Every single other religion is man reaching to God. Every single other religion is a works based religion. Every single other religion is focused on how we can be Good Enough for God.

I don't have much to say here, except this: do you know every single other religion that has ever existed? Have you studied the Vedas of Hinduism, or whatever texts are foundational to Shintoism? How about ancient religions of fallen civilizations lost to time? Is it not more than a little bit dishonest to make broad, sweeping claims about "every single other religion," especially when your own's adherents can hardly agree among one another on what the official doctrine demands? These things are complicated and we shouldn't make such generalizations given the vast amount of study one would have to go through in order to truly know what you're claiming to know here.

[renegadewangs]

Enigmatic Gnomance

Last night was movie night in my Discord server and we watched Sherlock Gnomes. Needless to say, things escalated very fast and I wrote a 2000+ words one-shot regarding the ending. Everyone liked it for some reason??? So here it is! (I’m not an expert on the gnome cinematic universe, please forgive me if I got a little detail wrong.)

Characters: Sherlock Gnomes, Watson Fandom: Sherlock Gnomes Pairings: (Lord help me,) Gnomes/Watson Warnings/rating: None. Summary: With the movie’s events behind them, Sherlock Gnomes ruminates on difficult matters.

Enigmatic Gnomance

The sun had set on the backyard when at last, Gnomes and Watson returned to their little home. Mrs. Udderson was nowhere to be seen, for which Watson found himself quite grateful. After all that'd occurred tonight, he wasn't in the mood for her invasive mooing. Gnomes hobbled over to the nearby armchair and settled himself down there. The deep crack in his leg instantly caught Watson's eye. He wasn't really a doctor- such a title was no more than an accessory in the world of gnomes. Even so, he found himself yearning to fix the injury somehow. He was responsible in a way, he felt. He'd been weak and he'd gotten cocky, which had made him a blind and unwilling pawn in Moriarty's little scheme.

But there was nothing to be done about it now; porcelain would never heal. Even with glue, Gnomes ran the risk of losing his leg forever if he were ever reckless.

Watson hesitated for a moment, then approached the armchair. His gaze wasn't being met. Gnomes had folded his hands together and was now peering towards his own feet. "Gnomes, ah... Are you alright? Can I get you anything?" he asked awkwardly.

Even with their reunion atop the bridge and their agreement to continue being partners, Gnomes still hadn't quite acknowledged the betrayal. It was maddening. Why wasn't he scolded? For Gnomes to come to terms with his rude dismissal of others had been the entire point, that much was true. However, to not see the gargoyles' true nature and be used by their master... That had been worthy of a good scoff, surely. Or at the very least an indignant sniff. Gnomes could have died, all due to Watson's own naivety. Sure enough, Gnomes didn't reply. The silence was worse than anything else he could have said.

"Gnomes..." Watson trailed off for a moment. Then he decided there was nothing to be gained by keeping his feelings bottled up. That was what'd caused this whole mess in the first place. "It's only us, now. Please, just talk to me."

"... I was ruminating, Watson," said Gnomes, still staring at his feet.

"Oh?"

"Yes, indeed. Ruminating. Quite deeply, I might say. My mind palace lost an entire dimension, attempting to process these hectic thoughts of mine. However, I'm afraid I'm drawing a blank. Perhaps, if you would be so kind, you might refresh my memory?"

The sober, forward nature of Gnomes's words caught Watson off guard. He hadn't known his friend to be so earnest, nor so willing to ask for help, for a very long time. Perhaps the day's events had made a difference after all. But then... Had it been Watson to make Gnomes see sense, or had it been Moriarty's doing? It was best not to think too hard on that, so he attempted to force the notion out of his mind.

"Of course, old friend." Watson placed a hand on the back of the armchair, smiling meekly. "If you need my help, you need only ask for it. Though perhaps... A bit more politely than you used to."

Gnomes uttered a chuckle, bitter as lime(stone). "Hah, quite right," he admitted. "I was wondering... Whether I actually took the time to say how sorry I am."

Watson felt his eyes widen and his body stiffen. Had he heard that correctly? Surely not. "Sorry" was a word not uttered aloud by Gnomes in a long time, short of demanding it from others.

"... What?"

"Quite a bit happened tonight. Moriarty is nothing if not a distraction. I'm certain I said quite a few things- to him and to you. However, it's all a bit of a blur, you see. Did I? Apologize?"

Watson shook his head fiercely. This was all wrong. This was what he'd wanted, and yet... No, he didn't deserve it, did he? "Gnomes- You aren't the one who needs to apologize. I put innocent gnomes in danger- I put you in danger. Moriarty could've won, all because I-I... I thought you'd..."

A hand on Watson's wrist caused any other words to vanish. He looked down to meet Gnomes's eyes. Even more out of place than the gnome's apology was the expression on his face, which Watson couldn't recall ever having seen once in all their years of partnership. What was it? Some sort of turmoil, certainly.

"My dear man, you were right to confront me with my attitude. To treat others in such dreadful a manner is already mortifying to me, in hindsight, but you... You deserved so much more and I fear I took your companionship for granted for the longest time. I'd forgotten just how brilliant you are, and so, you played the game quite well."

"Gnomes... Truly, you don't need to-"

"I am sorry, Watson. More sorry than even my own brilliant mind could ever begin to formulate."

Watson sighed and placed his own hand atop Gnomes's own. "I know. And I'm sorry as well."

For a long moment, nothing was said. Gnomes's eyes merely flitted towards Watson's hand and lingered there. Then, at last, he found his voice again. It had cracked almost as badly as his leg. "... I don't deserve a partner like you. Should you follow Irene's example and find your luck elsewhere, I would not blame you."

"Don't be a fool," Watson replied straight off the bat. "I did not go through so much trouble to teach you a lesson, only to toss away the benefits before I could reap them."

"You were perfectly content to abandon our partnership earlier."

"Well... It wasn't quite a partnership earlier, now was it?"

Gnomes appeared dumbstruck, though only for a moment. Then his lips carved themselves into a grin. "... Fair enough."

Watson took another shuffling step closer to the armchair, leaning forward and eyes narrowing into a bit of a squint. "Are you alright? Your leg... It looks quite damaged."

"It's only a few surface cracks," Gnomes replied, sticking his nose up in the air. "Nothing to worry about. The great Sherlock Gnomes is nothing if not resilient. It is a shame, though. That was my favorite leg."

Watson chuckled dryly. "I don't believe there's anything in this world you love more than yourself."

But Gnomes didn't reply. He merely stared ahead blankly at the wall. Had he gotten lost in his own thoughts again? Watson hadn't thought he'd said anything worth contemplating, nor blocking out.

"... Are you certain you're alright, Gnomes?" he asked.

"I... Yes." Gnomes blinked fiercely and rapped the fingers of his other hand against the armrest of the chair. "It's curious. You are quite clever, Watson, but then... Perhaps, unable to decipher the very same enigma which plagues me."

"An enigma, Gnomes?" Watson repeated. What was there still left to solve, at this point? It must've been significant, if Gnomes himself still struggled to put a finger on it. How tragic, then, that he would assume Watson would be unable to decipher it also. Were the learned lessons being foregone already? He hoped not.

"The time I spent with Irene... Well, surely you recall. It was a jolly good romp for a while, but I always knew she would come second place to the mysteries and the chases. And she came to know this as well. So in the end, a jolly good romp was all it was. I did not think I could ever love someone the way she expected me to."

Indeed, Watson did recall those 'jolly good romps'. He remembered the pain on Irene's face, which grew more severe with every instance where she'd been snubbed. He also remembered her resolution on the day she decided she would get over him. It was so very easy to rope her into his plans because the two of them related to one another. They both knew just how painful it was to be dismissed by Gnomes. They both agreed that the lesson had needed to come sooner and there was nothing left to salvage, but then... Watson hadn't given up quite as much hope as Irene, it turned out. It was a good thing that he hadn't.

"Indeed. But what's that got to do with another puzzle?" he asked.

"When I saw you fall and I heard that dreadful smashing sound... Well, I didn't want to think about it, really. I pushed it from my mind before it could ever take root there, because if I'd allowed that... Well, I'm sure I would've been quite useless for the remainder of the investigation."

"Oh, Gnomes, I didn't mean for you to-"

"It was a clever ploy, of course. I fell for it. Didn't even stop to consider you might catch yourself. That warrants another apology, I believe."

"No, really, it's fine. Perhaps I'd gone too far with that."

Gnomes's hand curled around Watson's wrist more fiercely. He turned his head upwards once again, brow furrowed, features pleading. "Watson," he began softly. "If I'd lost you... If you were truly gone, what would I do with myself? That's what I was ruminating on, you see. It pains me simply to envision the hypothetical, which is to say nothing of what would happen if it were a reality. I've never felt anything of the sort for Irene. So will you tell me, please?"

The situation was surreal. To hear words like that coming from his old friend... Well, the plan truly had been far more effective than Watson had expected it to be, though the result was overwhelming. Perhaps even unnerving. To earn Gnomes's respect and partnership was one thing, but to hear that his presence would've been missed so very dearly... That was more than he'd ever bargained for, or even dared to wish for. He didn't know how to feel now. He didn't understand what was being asked of him.

"... Tell you what, Gnomes?"

"Isn't there someone I love more than myself, or the thrill of the hunt?"

Watson's mind went blank. He felt quite cold, all of a sudden. But then... Also hot at the same time, as if he were standing out in the blazing sun of a warm summer's day. Gnomes's eyes were still on his own, waiting, perhaps deducing. Watson didn't dare look away. He was cornered now- trapped in Gnomes's intense stare.

Before tonight, his response would have been clear. He would have laughed bitterly at the question, then turned away from it. But then... Before tonight, it never would have been asked. Gnomes had never taken such things into consideration until he'd been forced to. To have Gnomes reflect on how much he'd always relied on Watson, that had been the goal. An unexpected side-effect, then, was that Watson now had to reflect on how much he'd relied on Gnomes. He'd wanted be looked at, to be acknowledged, to be praised- to be close to Gnomes, the way he used to when they first began to solve cases.

"I think that... The only one who could ever answer that question is you, Gnomes," he ultimately said.

"I... I need a hint, I believe," Gnomes replied in a bit of a stammer. "Just a clue, a morsel. The tiniest bit of guidance when it comes to deciphering these feelings."

"I'm not much help there, I'm afraid. I may be just as lost as you are."

"Oh... Are you really?" Gnomes paused for a moment, lips pursing and nose crinkling as he mulled it over. "If we're both lost in the same manner, does that not imply we both experience these same feelings?"

"Ah..."

And still, Watson had no true answer to give. Just as Gnomes's brilliant mind failed to form an apology strong enough to do the sentiment justice, so too did Watson's own fail to translate his feelings into words.

-Feelings? Were there feelings after all?

After about ten seconds, Gnomes tore his attention away from Watson's eyes and returned to gazing at his own feet. "Perhaps... It would be presumptuous to expect an answer to this riddle this very night. We are both taken by exhaustion, I'm sure. Delirious with it, perhaps. So..."

Still, no cohesive sentences came to Watson. Even so, he did have a reply, he thought. It wasn't a very clever one, but it was a reply all the same. He leaned forward to press a kiss against Gnomes's cheek. The gesture clearly shocked his friend, for he made a rather funny noise and attempted to jump up out of the chair. His bad leg, however, had other plans. Gnomes slumped backwards before he could ever fully stand upright and Watson caught him by the shoulders with both hands on instinct, cushioning the fall.

"Whaa- Whaaaat... son....!" Gnomes tilted his head backwards to peer up at him. "What...?"

"That was the small clue you were searching for, which ought to help you decipher these feelings of yours," Watson explained with another wry smile.

Gnomes appeared stunned. However, he soon relaxed in Watson's hold and eased himself back into the chair properly. "Indeed, that was quite helpful," he said. "Whatever would I do without your assistance, dear fellow? You truly are indispensable."

"It's good of you to say such things out loud, Gnomes. I expect to hear much more praise in the future."

"Of course!"

Indeed, they were both exhausted and had more than enough time to continue 'ruminating' on their feelings. For now, Watson was quite content to leave it that. Immense progress had already been made, and aside from that... Mrs. Udderson was still lurking high above them.