#The body is supposed to be an insulated wire

[driftingballoons]

Reviewing current carrying wires gave me an idea

[falseroar]

Murder on the Warfstache Express

Part 7: Incriminating Investigating

((Abe and Wilford continue their search of the passengers' rooms as the clues continue to pile up.

Links to Part 6: Room by Room and to Part 1 if you'd like to start from the beginning.))

While Richard’s room was far bigger than any compartment on this train had a right to be, his assistant’s felt smaller than any of the other single rooms they had seen so far. It might have had something to do with the collapsible desk and chair that took up the available free space not already occupied by the seat turned bed.

Both pieces of furniture felt flimsy and cheap to Abe, although that might have been because just brushing up against the chair made the thing collapse into an easy-to-pack heap at his feet. The desk was a little sturdier at least, which was good news for the stacks and stacks of papers and accounting ledgers covering it.

Abe could hear Wilford nosing around through the rest of Mack’s belongings while he focused on trying to make heads or tails of all of these numbers. Wilford had quickly taken to invading people’s privacy, but then he didn’t have a firm grasp on the whole “personal space” thing before this so it probably wasn’t much of a stretch for him. By now, Abe had completely given up on trying to convince Wilford to wait out in the hall, both because it seemed a futile effort and because he couldn’t trust him to stay put or not cause just as much havoc out there where he couldn’t keep an eye on him.

Not that having him in the same room made it any easier.

Despite his being uncharacteristically helpful so far, Abe still found himself tensing every time he caught a glimpse of the other man out of the corner of his eye, or heard some small sound or humming that reminded him he was still there. The detective’s fingers twitched often as he restrained himself from reaching for the gun he knew wasn’t there, his instincts going haywire at the insanity of turning his back on a known killer.

Instincts that screamed and hit every panic button his body had when a loud, metallic snap went off just behind his head, screams that might have become a little more physical than Abe meant them to be as he whirled around and found Wilford poking at a snarl of metal on the floor.

“What the hell is that?!”

“Why are you shouting?!” Wilford had the audacity to shush the detective as he added, “This is supposed to be a stealth mission, isn’t it?”

Abe’s fingers were twitching again, except instead of the grip of his gun he imagined them closing around Wilford’s neck. Shaking it off, Abe asked again, “What is that, and where did you find it?”

Wilford shrugged. “I dunno. Fell out from behind this wall panel after I poked it a bunch.”

“…Why did you poke the wall?”

Another shrug. “Looked weird. I like poking weird things.”

 Abe slapped Wilford’s hand away before he could demonstrate by poking the detective’s nose and took a closer look at said wall panel. Like the rest of the compartments, the walls were a mix of wood paneling and sections covered by red and gold patterned wallpaper that looked nice enough, if a bit worn out in some spots. Someone had either found a loose panel or pried it away from the wall to reveal a small space between the compartment wall and the backside of the wall facing out into the hallway, used to run pipes and wiring up and down the car along with a bit of extra insulation by the looks of it.

It also made a convenient hiding place for…whatever this thing was.

Abe knelt down to get a better look at the metal contraption, pulling a pen from his pocket to turn it over without getting his fingers close to the sharp, jagged pieces.

“This looks like a booby trap,” Abe said.

“Oh, tell me more!”

“Like something a hunter would use. Set it up, hide it under some brush or leaves or whatever’s out in the woods, and some animal goes and steps on it and bam!” Abe hadn’t meant to punctuate his words by triggering the trap he’d accidentally reset, but at his words the metal jumped again, except…

Except while he had been thinking about metal jaws clamping shut, the metal sprung up into the air about an inch and a blade shot straight upward before swiftly retracting back into the confines of the contraption.

A blade that still bore traces of blood on the edge.

“Seems a bit convoluted, if you ask me,” Wilford said. “What happened to just a good, old-fashioned stabbing? No need to go and make it complicated!”

As much as Abe hated to admit it, even in the privacy of his own mind (although with Wilford around that didn’t seem to count as much as it used to), Wilford was right. The thing was needlessly complicated, for what basically amounted to a six-inch stabbing range once triggered, if that. It also seemed like a devil to setup and remove, judging by how the moving pieces tried to take his fingers with them at least twice in just the minute or so he’d been handling it.

There were other signs of the previous victim, aside from the obvious bloodstain—a few threads poking out, connected to a small piece of fabric wedged tight within the gears.

“Speaking of stabbing, can I borrow your knife?” Abe asked, flinching when Wilford flourished the butterfly knife before taking it and using it to pry the piece of fabric free.

“You sure don’t play nice with other people’s toys, do you?” Wilford muttered as he took his knife back and closely examined the blade for any sign of damage.

“Knives aren’t toys, and neither is this thing,” Abe said, gesturing with the device in hand and hesitating.

Up until now, he’d been stashing away evidence in his pockets to keep it from disappearing, but this seemed like a monumentally bad idea for this particular piece. As much as he hated to do it, putting it back into the wall cavity behind the loose panel was probably the best move for now.

“And if someone comes in here to move it, that should be incriminating enough on its own,” Abe said.

“Someone like us?”

“This isn’t incriminating, this is investigating,” Abe protested. “Although yes, sometimes they can and do look like the same thing at a distance…”

Something itched at the back of Abe’s brain and he looked back at the desk covered in ledgers and notes, until the itch turned into Happy’s voice, repeating what he said back over dinner: “owner and CEO of multiple enterprises, at least seven of which are currently under investigation for money laundering and fraud…”

Happy had known a lot about the rich idiot off the top of his head. More than the kind of observational stuff you could just pull out of your fedora after looking at someone for a bit. No, that was someone who had done his research before getting on this train.

Shame then that the agent hadn’t kept a notepad or anything similar on him that might’ve given away what else he’d been looking into, although considering Abe couldn’t even read his badge it would have just been another tantalizing clue he couldn’t do anything with.

“Just three rooms left,” Abe reminded himself. “Although I think I’m already starting to get a picture of what happened…”

 “Then what’s the point of searching the other rooms?” Wilford asked as he followed the detective out of Mack’s room and across the hall into Ms. Dorene Whitacre’s room, quickly identified thanks to the open trunk full of dresses, shawls, and other clothes underneath the window, along with a heady whiff of the woman’s perfume lingering in the air. What looked to be a hand-made quilt was draped over the foot of the bed, along with several extra pillows, while the other seat in the room had some half-finished knitting left out on it. Wilford picked this up, admiring both the needlework and the very sharp and pointed needles that came with it.

“I said I’m starting to get a picture, but there’s still a few corner pieces missing, and some bits of sky I can’t make heads or tails of,” Abe said, but he was barely listening to himself. He knew no one was above suspicion, but something about being in the older woman’s room left him with a feeling of unease despite the complete ordinariness of it all.

He could feel a judging stare on him as he looked inside the trunk, and when it became too overbearing, he glared back at Wilford and said, “Could you knock it off?”

“That is a lady’s bloomers you are handling,” Wilford said, and the detective quickly dropped the piece of fabric he had pulled out without being able to see it clearly by the lanternlight. “And I don’t see what the big deal is. Dorene is a lovely woman, who cares if she does a little murder on the side?”

“Literally everyone! Being lovely or nice or whatever else doesn’t matter if you go around killing people!”

“…Huh.” Wilford tilted his head, as though this were a new concept to him. “No, no, that doesn’t sound right at all.”

“Yeah, well, good thing you’re not in charge of this investigation then, isn’t it?” Abe asked as he continued his search, although being a little more careful about where he rummaged.

There was nothing too out of the ordinary in the trunk, aside from the pouch filled with an extraordinary amount of medicine. Then again, he supposed that wasn’t too out of the ordinary for a lot of people either, but he still took the time to check all of the labels just in case.

Heartburn meds, aspirin, eyedrops, antidote for poison, allergy medicine…

Well, one of those things was not like the others.

Abe tilted the bottle to better read the label. It wasn’t a regular pill bottle like you’d pick up at the pharmacy, obviously, and the label didn’t just come out and say “antidote for that rare poison you’ve got in your pocket, detective,” but Abe recognized the name.

“Why do you know so much about poison?” Wilford asked.

“Comes up a lot when your average rich jerk with a recently changed will turns up dead,” Abe said, pocketing the bottle as he straightened up. If he was going to be carrying around a bottle of poison, he might as well keep the antidote with it just in case. “Among other things, but that’s usually the big one.”

“Well, good thing we don’t have any of those around here, now isn’t it?”

 Huh. That was some pretty blatant sarcasm in Wilford’s tone. He really must have taken Richard’s comment about his fashion sense at dinner to heart.

“Oh, please, like I’d care what someone who decorates a room like the one we saw back there has to say about fashion,” Wilford said with a roll of his eyes. “Can we move on to the next room already? I’d rather Dorene not find us poking around her boudoir, if you catch my drift.”

“Do you even know what that word means?”

“Not a clue! But I like how it rolls off the tongue: boudoir.”

Abe shrugged, but felt like he’d found all that he was going to, and they really didn’t have the time to spend too long in any one room. He wasn’t sure how long Benjamin could keep the guests happy in the lounge before they got antsy enough to start wandering around or heading back to their own rooms, whether or not the murderer had been found.

“And just what do you think you’re doing there, friend?”

Although Abe would have hoped his luck could have held out a little longer, especially when he turned to see Illinois pushing the brim of his hat back to get a better look at the detective caught in the act of closing Dorene’s door while the petite professor behind him folded her arms and shook her head with disapproval.

Two rooms left, and of course they would belong to the two people who just caught him in the act of snooping around.

“For shame, whoever you are,” the professor said. “Poking around in a lady’s room without her permission?”

Wilford said, “That’s what I tried to tell him!”

“I’m not poking around,” Abe said, and she wasn’t the only one who scoffed at him.

“He was looking for clues to find the murderer,” Illinois said, in his usual, unhurried tone. “What any detective worth his badge would do in this situation. I suppose you were planning on looking in our rooms as well?”

Abe cleared his throat and instead of answering that asked, “Just what are you two doing out here, anyway? I thought Benjamin was supposed to be keeping everyone gathered together in the lounge car for safety.”

“Little missy here said she had something important to check on in the baggage car, and I could hardly let her go alone.”

“Do not call me ‘little missy,’” the professor said, and drew herself up to her full if still not very intimidating height as she explained, “I have something very sensitive and valuable stored in the baggage car, and if it was damaged during the sudden stop or tampered with in any way, we could have a very serious situation on our hand.”

“More serious than the murder?” Abe asked.

The professor scoffed again and said, “Oh, you have no idea. To be fair, I’m not entirely sure what would happen if it got damaged either, but my projections say it would definitely be on the side of ‘not good.’”

“Professor Beauregard was very insistent about that,” Illinois added. “And I thought it couldn’t hurt to check and just be sure. But if you’re wanting to take a look around our rooms, I think we’d be glad to take a little detour and open the doors for you so you don’t have to go sneaking in, then we can all go to the baggage car together. Safety in numbers and all that.”

Clever son of a gun. It’s not like Abe could turn him down now that they both knew what the detective was planning on doing, and of course Abe would want to know what the professor had up there that was so precious and dangerous she just had to check on it. Framing the offer as an invitation meant Abe could save some face and still look around their rooms, which meant he had to be grateful even while Illinois ensured he and Professor Beauregard could keep an eye on him at the same time.

Illinois’s smile was disarming even in the slightly unsteady light of the lantern, his voice so friendly and genuine that Abe almost immediately forgot his suspicions as Illinois gestured toward his own room and said, “Well, shall we? I’ve got nothing to hide.”

Abe nodded, silently yelling at himself to get a grip. He could not let himself get distracted by a pretty face during the middle of an investigation, not again.

“Not that there’s much to see, of course,” Illinois said, in direct contrast to the strange array of items littered around the room, from a coiled bullwhip hanging on the coat hook by the door to the map pinned to the wall, its surface littered with so many pins connected by bits of string that even Abe thought it was a bit excessive. He gestured toward the locked trunk sitting to one side and said, “Just a few odds and ends I’ve picked up on my travels, on their way to a museum where they belong.”

“Yeah, I can’t just take your word on that one, pal,” Abe said. “Mind opening the trunk?”

“Not at all, friend,” Illinois answered without batting an eye. He pulled a key from one of the pouches on his hip and unlocked the trunk, opening it to reveal a lot of packing straw and several bundles carefully wrapped in leather and string to protect their contents. “This little beauty I picked up at a temple in Ohio. For some reason the locals begged me to take it from there—usually it’s the other way around with these things, but who am I to judge?”

Illinois unwrapped the covering, and for a split second the lanterns Abe and the professor were holding illuminated the glimmering jewel, a second too long as both recoiled and begged him to cover it, cover it now, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts—

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Illinois said, rewrapping the terrible, terrible jewel. “Eye of the beholder situation, everyone else who looks upon it is ‘filled with madness’ or something like that. You know how local legends can be sometimes.”

“Don’t…don’t ever do that again,” Abe said, barely able to get the words out as his lungs struggled for air.

Beside him, Professor Beauregard was doubled over, and he could just barely hear her say, “I think I’m going to be sick…” before lurching toward the bathroom.

“Would you like to see what else is in the trunk?” Illinois asked.

“No!” Abe and the professor shouted in unison, possibly the only time either one of them didn’t want to know more about something.

Illinois shrugged and relocked the trunk while Wilford said, “I don’t get what all the fuss was about. Just some fancy little piece of jewelry. I want to know more about this!”

Abe reached out one hand and grabbed the back of Wilford’s collar before he could get his grabby little mitts on the bullwhip, asking Illinois as he did so, “The conductor let you bring that on the train?”

“What, the whip? Of course, I never travel without it.”

“But he didn’t make you put it in the weapons safe?” Abe pressed.

“There’s a weapons safe?”

Abe scowled, wondering if he was the only person on this entire train who had his weapon taken from him, and took out his frustration by pacing the room and checking every other corner he could find, even tapping the walls to be sure of no more hidden compartments before finally having to relent and admit there was nothing else worth noting in the adventurer’s room. At least nothing related to the current murder situation.

But, while he had the man at hand, he might as well try to get all the information he could.

With that thought in mind, Abe carelessly picked up an ordinary enough looking rock and turned it over in his hand as he asked, “Did you know the victim?”

“No,” Illinois said, plucking the rock from Abe’s hand and returning it to its place with undue care. “Couldn’t even tell you the poor soul’s name. Saw him in the lounge car yesterday and I meant to introduce myself, but never got a chance to so much as say hello. I’d hoped to get to know both of you better after dinner, but he wasn’t too keen to chat at the bar and you were…well, I don’t like to wake someone sleeping that well.”

“You were snoring very loudly,” the professor added, returning from the bathroom and already looking better now that the jewel of Ohio was locked away again. “I had to go back to my room just to be able to concentrate enough to work.”

“What about you, did Happy talk to you?” Abe asked, trying to ignore that remark.

The professor paused, brow furrowed. “Well, yes, he stopped by where I was working in the lounge before dinner, but I could have sworn he used a different name. Then again, I’m not the greatest at names and I was so focused on working out the math behind a particularly tricky theory at the time, so who knows?”

“And what did he say?” Abe was trying to be patient, he really was.

“Oh, that I missed a coefficient!” The professor clapped her hands together, eyes lighting up. “Silly me, don’t know how it happened, but that was just the thing to prove without a doubt that—that, um…”

She cleared her throat and admitted, “I’m not really supposed to talk about it, but let’s just say it was a really big deal, and proves I was right, and that’s all you need to know about that. Anyway, of course I had to ask him how he spotted that, but he just said he was good with numbers, which, okay, sure buddy, and he started asking me all of these questions about my work? He knew so much I think he has to have been working for—for someone who’d like me to say more than I should, not that I would ever do that, of course. Luckily the dining car opened then and I could make an excuse about wanting to sit with Illinois so he’d leave me alone.”

“Oh,” Illinois said, looking a little crestfallen while Abe was still trying to parse that firehose of information. “And here I thought you wanted to get to know me a little better.”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, I’d still love to take some samples of your artifacts before you take them to the museum or wherever it is you’re going, and maybe do a brain scan while we’re at it,” Professor Beauregard said, adding in a low voice to Abe, “I suspect radiation or some kind of hallucinogenic gas would explain some of the things he claims to have seen on his ‘expeditions.’”

Abe nodded without really listening, still thinking about the agent who somehow managed to catch a mistake in the professor’s notes and knew all about whatever confidential project she was working on. Was she the reason he was on this train?

Now that he thought about it, swapping rooms with Abe would have put Happy just as close to the professor’s room as Richard Moneybags—maybe he had been a little too quick to assume Happy had decided to work for the rich idiot.

Speaking of the idiot…

“Did either of you know anyone else on the train before yesterday?” Abe asked, and their hesitation and waiting for the other to answer first said a lot all on its own.

“Actually, I knew Dorene—or rather, knew of her,” Illinois said, cracking a smile as he said, “Imagine my surprise when I found one of my biggest benefactors here on this train. She’s donated a lot of money to museums, and helped fund more than one of my expeditions to get a relic back where it belongs. Lovely lady, which is why it’s a shame we’ve only ever communicated by letter before yesterday.”

“You two just happened to be on the same train?” Abe asked. “A train that literally has less than a carful of passengers?”

Illinois shrugged. “I was in the area for work, she was doing some sightseeing, and we’re both headed to a grand opening of a new wing at a museum—she helped fund it, and I’m helping fill it with that trunk over there.”

“Please tell me the Ohio thing isn’t going on display,” Abe said.

“That? Nah, that’s…” Illinois paused. “Actually, I’m not sure what I’m going to do with it. Usually it’s either take it to a museum or return it to its place of origin, I’ve never been in a situation where neither one wants anything to do with it.”

“You could sell it,” Professor Beauregard pointed out, before adding under her breath, “Not that anyone in their right mind would ever pay for something like that…”

Illinois grimaced and said, “Selling to a private buyer is always a dangerous road to go down in my line of work. As soon as you’re willing to put a price on something, there’s always someone who thinks that means it’s open season to bid for any and everything else you discover. Besides, who cares about the money?”

Spoken like someone who hadn’t taken more than a few dirty jobs just to make ends meet, but Abe sensed an opportunity and took it to suggest, “Well, you’ve got one person on this train rich and stu-er, adventurous enough to make an offer if you change your mind.”

He didn’t even have to say the name “Richard Moneybags” to get a reaction out of both of them.

Illinois grimaced while the professor all but gagged again, but it was the adventurer who admitted, “Yeah, thank you for the suggestion, but I think I’ll give that one a pass. If I’m being honest, Dick and I don’t exactly see eye to eye when it comes to matters of…ownership. Namely, that he thinks anything has a price if you push the right people hard enough.”

Well, that sounded enough like a euphemism for even Abe to catch it.

“’The right people’ as in someone willing to steal it if the owners aren’t selling?” Abe guessed.

Illinois just shrugged and said, “Nothing that can be proven, but word gets around. Although judging by what he’s got on display in his room over there, my guess is that his dealers can’t always deliver what they promise and make do with what they can—bit lucky for them then that he’s not so good at telling the real from the fake.”

“Sounds about right,” Professor Beauregard said with a snort. “All looks and no depth.”

“Okay, I’ll bite,” Abe said, turning on the professor. “What’s your deal with Moneybags?”

“My ‘deal’? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

She managed to say that with a straight face, and behind her Wilford rolled his eyes and took the opportunity to pull a large sip from a flask—Abe’s flask, which the detective suddenly realized wasn’t in his pocket.

Abe scowled at Wilford but had to let it go for now and focus on the professor. “Sure, like I couldn’t see the way you were glaring at the guy last night. Look, I get it, the guy’s an asshole, I’m just curious how you figured that out for yourself.”

The professor stared at him, jaw working as she started to answer only to rethink it over and over again until she finally settled on saying, “Mr. Bags has made a lot of money by having a lot of ‘ideas,’ and then paying other people to make those ideas happen. He’s also made a lot of money by making sure those people don’t waste time thinking about little things like the consequences of those big ideas until they belong to other people. I mean, this is just hearsay and of course I wouldn’t know anything personally, certainly not anything I could legally share with anyone here, but you get the idea, right?”

“Uh…sure,” Abe said.

“I guess you’ll still want to look at my room,” Professor Beauregard said. If she was looking to change the subject, she still managed to sound and look equally unenthused at her own idea. “This just seems like a waste of time though, you know? But I know it’s important to be thorough, and Illinois had to go ahead and let you look around his room, so it’d look bad if I didn’t do the same. Sorry in advance, I like to work while I travel and things are a bit all over the place because of the train slamming on its brakes and everything.”

As Abe had already discovered, once the professor got to talking it was very hard to get a word in edgewise, especially when she managed to say all of that in the space of time it took to leave Illinois’s room and walk across the hall. Still, once she unlocked the door and pulled it open for the others to see the interior, there was just enough of a pause for the detective to comment on the sight.

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me!” Abe crossed over the scattered papers and books, hardly paying them any mind as he stopped and pointed at the very large and very obvious blaster sitting on the couch that no one had bothered to convert into a bed. “What is this?!”

Professor Beauregard shrugged. “Just a little something for self-defense. You can’t be too careful traveling alone these days.”

“She’s right,” Illinois chimed in. “I like to keep an open mind toward my fellow travelers, but there are some dangerous folks out there.”

“But—but this is…” Abe trailed off, looking from the gun that might as well have fallen out of a sci-fi pulp novel to the others in search of some sign anyone else saw the obvious problems here, but with no luck. He settled for muttering under his breath about the conductor and his stupid weapons policy before asking about the other “equipment.” “What’re all these machines for?”

“Monitoring equipment,” Professor Beauregard answered, slapping the detective’s hand away before he could press any of the large and inviting buttons. “Among other things. It’s all to aid my research, although now I’m mostly going through and trying to put all of the data together into something that even a bunch of monkeys in suits can understand.”

Illinois asked, “Are we talking metaphorical monkeys here, or…?”

He shrugged when the others stared at him and said, “I’ve seen enough to know better than to make assumptions.”

“Investors,” the professor with the same tone of voice she’d use to describe something she’d found on the bottom of her shoe. “I technically can’t talk about it, and I don’t see that it has anything to do with what’s going on here. What is it you’re looking for again, detective?”

That was a good question. If there was a clue here, he’d be hard-pressed to recognize it among all of the gadgets and gizmos, never mind all of the notes written in the professor’s neat handwriting, the notations all perfectly legible and yet still beyond any hope of Abe understanding a single word of it.

Still, he made the same show of walking around the room, checking under the bed and standing by while the professor opened her bag to prove there were no additional weapons hidden among her clothes, or among the currently unoccupied cases for all of the equipment arranged around the room.

There was only the very obvious blaster she just had lying out where anyone could get it, but seeing it reminded Abe of Happy’s strange, toy-like gun, currently tucked away in his belt under his jacket.

“Did you make that thing?” Abe asked, gesturing toward the blaster.

“Yep!” Professor Beauregard hefted the blaster up on her shoulder, the thing nearly as big as her torso, and seemed oblivious to the way Abe and Illinois both flinched away at the sight. “I put it together while I was testing some potential uses of the—uh. I probably shouldn’t talk about that, either.”

She hesitated and Abe asked, “So you didn’t have a source, or know anyone who might make other…unorthodox weapons?”

“Nope, can’t say that I do. I don’t really care much for guns or stuff like that, if I’m being honest.” The professor shrugged and added, “Not bad for my first time though, right? Still working on the balance, and it has a tendency to pull to the right a little when you pull the trigger, but that shouldn’t be hard to correct for. Not that I’m planning on needing to use it much, of course.”

She beamed at Abe, who hated to imagine what she could make if she were a gun enthusiast. As it was, she seemed a little too comfortable wielding that giant blaster, which made it a relief when Illinois was the one who pointed out, “You may need to leave that here while we’re at the front of the train. Sounds like the conductor fellow isn’t a fan of blasty things.”

“Oh, of course,” Professor Beauregard said, setting the blaster down while behind her two of the men breathed silent sighs of relief.

Wilford, on the other hand, kept shooting such covetous looks at the blaster that Abe decided he better cut this search short before the man got any funny ideas.

((End of Part 7. Thanks for reading! And my apologizes to the Ohioans (excepting Mark, for obvious reasons).

Also that puzzle reference Abe made is 100% something Sam Vimes has said before. Cannot recommend the Discworld City Watch books enough if you haven't checked them out before.

Link to Part 8: What the Engineer Didn't Hear.

Tag list: @silver-owl413 @asteriuszenith @withjust-a-bite @blackaquokat @catgirlwarrior @neverisadork @luna1350 @oh-so-creepy @95fangirl @a-bit-dapper @randomartdudette @cactipresident @hotcocoachia @purple-star-eyes @shyinspiredartist @avispate @autumnrambles @authorracheljoy @liafoxyfox @hidinginmybochard))

[unterwaesche]

So MAYBE I’m overreacting -- BIG maybe -- but my wife has been getting on me about fixing the insulation in the part of the crawlspace where the only access is from the basement and there’s at least a good hundred or so nails jamming the access hole shut.

And like, we bought this house at $100,000 cheaper than literally any other house in the area.  And we found out pretty quick that that wasn’t just our luck...well, it was...but okay, so there was a crawlspace with access from the outside, this is the Midwest, it was 2013, had the house inspected in February.  Three feet of snow and all that.  But anyway...

So the kitchen, when the snow melted, started smelling like shit and I discovered the crawlspace and THEN discovered that the kitchen sink was dumping onto the ground inside that crawlspace.  

I start tearing down the wall on the other side of the kitchen to move the sink over to that side, the studs are sideways.  So what the fuck.  I gut the whole thing and discover that whoever cut the joists cut them a little bit too short, and they’re being held up by tongue-and-groove flooring, except for the rim joist, which was being held up by the will of God and possibly the roof.  Turns out they extended the kitchen out by enveloping the porch, but they built the kitchen OVER the porch not having removed the damn thing, and they cut out the studs to do it.

Note:  This house balloon frame, meaning the studs go from the foundation all the way up and hold up the roof.

Those were load bearing studs.

Then when I tore out my bathroom because I don’t even know what they fucked up in there but there was a lot of mold, I found out that they did the same thing on THAT half of the house too, except also, somebody put a bumpout in the room right behind the bathroom, and so those load-bearing studs are absolutely also cut out to create the space...and so the joists aren’t actually being held up by anything on one end, and essentially the not-supposed-to-be-a-load-bearing-wall wall on the side opposite the load-bearing wall, which is just a floating wall that isn’t actually nailed to anything and made of 2x2s, is doing a LOT of work.

So then I’m redoing the room we’re going to put my son in, and I notice a lot of fire damage and knob-and-tube wiring that the seller said they got rid of.  A lot of fire damage.  And water damage.  And termite damage, for good measure.

I’d also like to note that the most robust rose tree I have ever seen in my entire life is growing right outside of where that sealed crawlspace is.  Seriously, I’ve tried to kill this fucker ten different ways.  It’s getting its buds.  The evergreen I planted ten feet away is dying.

So this all begs the question:  Am I REALLY that crazy for being afraid of finding a dead body in that crawlspace?

[rememberthisham]

All He Ever Wanted Ch. 16

About five hours later Dib stretched his arms over his head. His back was mad at him for standing so hunched for so long but he'd done it. All nine hundred and eighty squares. All three thousand nine hundred and twenty corners were shocked and tested. It wasn't as bad as he thought it would be, some did interesting things when tested. One of them made Zim start to hiccup. One of them rapidly opened and closed the four smaller panels on the PAK's shell while it was being shocked. One of them made a ding like a toaster oven and GIR shouted "Pie's done!"

Overall it was an interesting experience, and he'd gotten a lot faster at it the more he'd done. The only issue was the lack of one.

Every single node had responded as it was supposed to, there were no errors and no loose wires. Zim scratched at his arms in thought.

"If the wiring is flawless, as it should be, then the issue must lie in the gray matter." He reasoned. Dib furrowed his eyebrows. 

"Like the brain?"

"Similar," Zim responded simply. "Carefully twist the inside wall of the PAK clockwise, pressing just above where the wires are."

Dib did as instructed, surprised as the strip of the inner wall where the wires connected to the PAK clicked and slid clockwise until it could be slid up and out of the container. He lifted the wire mesh carefully out of the PAK on its hoop and set it aside. The underside of the square nodes he'd been testing all protruded with a larger wire, about the width of yarn, and ran back into the PAK. They were capped in insulating caps, much like rubber, that couldn't be disconnected from the…

The…

The very bottom layer of Zim's PAK appeared to be a brain. The delicate light green color was the only differentiation between it and the brains Dib was more familiar with. It was at the bottom and therefore the largest part of the PAK so it was significant in size. 

Something most people who aren't prodigy sons of scientists don't know is that the brain is not solid, it's not even gelatinous, it's liquid. More accurately it's snot-like in texture. A gross flemmy liquidly organ that fills the space of any container it's in. This brain filled the bottom of Zim's PAK and was about the size of a basketball if it were to be made round. It attached to the wire mesh through the yarn-like wires and appeared to connect to the reinforced rods that held Zim's PAK to his back. Dib stared in wonder at the pure science fiction of it. No wonder Zim was hesitant to share the secrets of his PAKs technology, it really was amazing.

"It's a brain," Dib said finally. Zim smiled to himself but made sure Dib didn't see.

 

"Yes, silly monkey, that is my PAK's brain. Make sure it's properly connected to the wires." Dib examined every rubber wire cap carefully in search of a breach or imperfection. There was nothing, it was perfect. Dib found the whole mechanism a little breathtaking.

"It's all good." He said finally and Zim growled in frustration.

"Your inferior eyes are missing something, check again." He hissed. Dib once again examined the wiring, tugging lightly to test and still finding nothing amiss.

"It's really fully connected." He reaffirmed. Zim balled his fists, raging in silence for a moment before calming himself. 

"What about the greater connection?" He asked.

"What's that?"

"Where it wires to my central column." He explained. Dib gingerly pulled the brain away from the edge of the PAK where it connected to Zim's back. There were wires there as well being fed through the tubes and directly into Zim's body.

"I'd have to take it off to see," Dib admitted.

"Very well." 

With some effort, Dib managed to reassemble the Pak's innards. He replaced the wire mesh carefully sliding it counterclockwise and clicking it back into position. He reassembled the tools and PAK legs, marveling one more time at how they all fit complexly and perfectly no matter what order he put them back in. He closed the panel on top and took a deep breath. 

"Now that I know what's in it, I don't wanna break it." He admitted. Zim huffed.

"When the exoskeleton is closed it's practically indestructible." The alien assured him. "Computer," Zim commanded, "set a timer for nine minutes and thirty seconds."

"If you say so…" the computer answered hesitantly. Carefully Dib removed the PAK from Zim in its entirety.

Dib set the PAK on the table and looked at the remaining metal socket embedded permanently in Zim's back.

If he knew his sockets, which the six-time international engineering and robotics champion had better, he knew these were wire sockets. Unsurprising with how many wires he'd encountered so far. They were an easy conduit for two sets of wires to attach and detach to each other at will. It was likely if not definite that the socket attached to wires in the inside of his body perfectly matched the ones coming from the brain so electrical pulses of information could be carried between the two.

"There's wires behind your exoskeleton?" He asked.

"Yes, they lead to Zim's brain." He answered. Dib hummed lightly.

"There's no problem with any of this machinery, if you really wanted to dig deeper I'd have to crack your skull open." He laughed. Zim pressed a button on his PAK and it extended its tubes from its attachment socket, automatically finding Zims back and reattaching itself. 

"You've been helpful, human." Zim dismissed his joke, a grim yet distracted expression overtaking his face. Dib crossed his arms and looked at the floor.

He really thought this would feel better. He thought finding out the mysteries of the PAK would make him feel satisfied in some way, but the failure to actually fix the problem just felt bitter, even if he didn't have a lot of stake in the issue, to begin with. He could look deeper into it if he could just get into Zim's head to see where those last few wires went, but that was absurd…

Wait.

"Actually," Dib got another idea that felt madder than the one that had gotten him here. 

"What is it now?" Zim spat, clearly just as bitter as Dib had been.

"I might not have to cut you open to keep trying, my dad's Lab has an MRI machine." He suggested lightly. Zim narrowed his eyes in unvoiced confusion. "It stands for Magnetic…uh…magnetic something imaging. I wanna say radiation but I know that's not it." He explained. "It uses magnetic waves to make an image of someone's brain for study. It might help give us some insight into whether or not your problem's all the way in your head." He finished. Zim put his hands on his hips and thought. He was over getting help from the human but he was also running out of options. If he couldn't figure this out he'd never get his position in life back. He didn't like Dib or his Lab and he wasn't going to just voluntarily return to where he'd been imprisoned and threatened with vivisection.

"You're crazy if you think I'm going to go with you into your weird…human liar." He decided. Dib had to admit that was fair. He thought about the way he'd trapped Zim and felt momentary embarrassment for what he'd done. How he thought he was saving the world. How he thought his dad's little home lab would intimidate an intergalactic mad scientist. Zim had been rescued by his minions, perhaps a little insurance would make him more comfortable?

"How about this time you bring GIR and Minimoose? As a show of good faith?" He suggested tentatively. Zim stuck out his lip and thought hard about the offer.

"That would be…fractionally more acceptable." He admitted. "We leave immediately!"

"What?" Dib panicked this time, why did he think Zim wouldn't want to go right away?

"No, we can't go now."

"Explain!"

"My da–"

EXPLAIN!"

"...My dad's home right now so I can't use his lab." He said. Zim leaned back at the waist, letting his arms dangle behind him.

"The monarch…" he scowled to himself.

"He…" Dib remembered a recent conversation with relief. "He leaves next week for Tokyo, we can do it then." He promised.

"I see." Zim closed his eyes and stared simply. "I guess I'll see you some time next week then."

"Good–"

"Now GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

Next

[talesfromsigil]

Royal Road: https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/74124/theseus/chapter/1347443/solitude-and-boredom

I didn’t remember much more of that night. I remembered that I had a good time. But I woke up the next morning feeling like absolute garbage. But I had woken up in the ship. In my heart. On a familiar medical bed. The core module was right there. If I could just hop in, maybe this growing, pounding headache could be mitigated.

I groaned, though, when my eyes started to focus and I saw that the chamber was closed, and there were a pair of insulated wires sticking out of the bottom of the release mechanism, indicating that Doc had anticipated my desires and removed the choice entirely.

I reached back and grabbed the uncomfortable plastic pillow beneath the paper sheet and shoved it into my face, ignoring the cold introduced by my movement when I threw off the top of the rough blanket someone must have provided. The room was too bright. My head pounded. I hoped that it was just a hangover and that these weren’t the effects of the withdrawal from connecting to the core module that I’d have to endure for another two days. Part of me wanted to try to pry the lid open with my bare hands and alleviate at least one possibility, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. It was a needfully secure chamber.

Pushing myself up, I was glad that my body at least wasn’t heavy with anesthetics anymore. It seemed I would have to face both my hangover and the din of enduring the world without the core module. Mercifully, there was an unopened aluminum can of water next to my bed, which I grabbed and guzzled down with the urgency of a starving animal. It helped. Setting the empty can back down, I pulled the blanket over my shoulders and stood up, stumbling forward before catching myself on the wall. It was going to be a long day.

—

Walking out of the bathroom, it felt strange that I hadn’t done that in over a week. The core module was self-cleaning and filtered waste out almost immediately, and waste was already minimal given the light diet one needed to sit still all day. I’d become accustomed to just… letting my body take care of itself in that regard. Still, it was another little thing that helped me feel better after the rough night.

Closing my eyes, I gave a brief glance over the ship. No one else was inside. They must have all already been busy with their work and errands in the colony. For the first time, I was alone inside of my shell. It felt peaceful.

Making my way down to the mess, I scoured the cabinets and sighed when I saw that there were several new large boxes of the disgusting rations I’d grown to despise sitting on the floor. To my relief, however, there was also a healthy smattering of low-grade boxed foods I’d seen a thousand times in grocery stores back home as well, and a few bags of easily preserved dry vegetables. I breathed a sigh of relief knowing that at least we wouldn’t be completely without real food.

Sitting at the table, I popped open a box of cereal and shoveled a handful of the sugary flakes into my mouth. It was food, at least, and it didn’t make me want to throw it right back up.

As I enjoyed my breakfast, I stared down at the terminal on my arm. I’d nearly forgotten in my awful morning that I had a duty to perform as well. I needed to become a competent pilot in two days. I sighed as I tapped the console. I at least had to take a look at what was on the new blade. The data on the terminal and the data in my head combined to help me focus on it easier.

A training AI. Or rather I was supposed to be the training AI? I supposed it would be more of a performance diagnostic for me, but I couldn’t help but wonder if this would even work correctly, given that I had such different needs from its intended use case. It had several virtual reality scenarios that would play directly into my implant when I ran them. A basic maneuvers tutorial, a military operations guide, a simulation of battles in space, both for small skirmishes and for maneuvering through large battles. There was also a file labeled with a warning. It would simulate ship damage. I swallowed and decided that perhaps I should save that one for when Doc could supervise.

I had to wonder how real it would all feel. I’d used VR for safety training before, but I’d obviously never had it transmitted directly into my brain. Would it be just like the real thing? If so, I wondered if it would be just like being in the core module.

I pushed the box of cereal away from me and let out a sigh. Just the basic maneuvering tutorial, so I could see what it felt like. Then I’d finish my meal and go lie down again. I selected the file and pressed run.

—

I could feel myself floating. It felt familiar, but impersonal. Like it wasn’t really me in the core module. It took a moment for my mind to recall what was happening. VR. This was a simulation. The fact that I’d momentarily forgotten that was a little bit frightening, but what was even more jarring was the fact that I didn’t seem to be able to reach outside of the virtual environment. I suppose it made sense that a core would need to be contained within the confines of the scenario to make the most of the training. Still, it was disconcerting that I didn’t have an exit button. I would have to run through the entire program.

To my disappointment, it didn’t feel quite as comforting as the real thing, but it was at least familiar in a good way. I closed my eyes and examined myself. It was there that I realized why it felt alien. It wasn’t Theseus. It was a Foundation dropship. I supposed that the software had to have been developed by someone. Still, I wondered how effective the scenarios would translate to the larger ship I was familiar with. I supposed that it was the theory I was learning, and I would have to apply it in practice in the real world.

Reaching into the ship’s systems, it gave me access without any hassle, and the environment around me began to form as I grabbed the sensor data. I was flying downward toward a desert plane. There was a prompt in the code, describing a complex point system that encouraged an AI model to operate correctly. My score was quickly plummeting, and I realized that I’d spent too long parsing my environment and I was about to plunge into the dirt.

—

I jolted back from the table, still reeling at my impending crash, my heart racing at my thankfully brief spike of adrenaline. That was… jarring. I looked down at the console and saw it printing out a report with a ‘CATASTROPHIC FAILURE’ printed in large red text at the top. I stared at it for a few minutes before I muttered “Ouch.” And closed out of the interface. I didn’t trust my body to maintain itself during the simulation, I should have left it there until Doc came back to the ship. That would have been the responsible thing to do.

Grabbing another handful of cereal, though, I looked around the kitchen and realized that I truly had nothing else to do. I’d just be wandering around my shell all day, waiting for them like a pet left behind at an apartment while someone was at their day job. I reluctantly opened the program again and stood up to return to my heart, ready to begin some potentially dangerous training out of boredom.

[sonomalavender456]

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[softgrungeprophet]

designing my own version of an electro-proof suit for peter without looking at any existing ones and trying to figure out if i can get away with him just printing a (web-shaped) grid of copper or silver or something on the surface of the insulating substrate (in this case, nomex-laminated neoprene rubber) or if it's supposed to be fully coated since most irl conductive fabrics are pretty thoroughly metallic

though, faraday cages use wire or mesh so i guess i should be able to get away with that esp if peter is head to toe in fire resistant rubber. the purpose of the metal is just to guide electricity along the surface and down the grounding strip/away from his body (which would also presumably prevent scorching of the insulated base), not to actually make his whole body conductive lol

update: i googled silver nanoparticle screen printing ink and it's at minimum $200 a bottle so peter just gets his already pricey nomex-lined neoprene

(also i couldn't make it look good)

(lucky for him he has a real (part time) job in addition to the bugle freelance when this happens)

[inbabylontheywept]

That Isn't a Ship, It's a Cannon with FTL! Pt. 3

Aggral is a boy, watching an old crone draw cards from her deck.

The first card foretells his coming of age, and she plucks it from the deck with the careless grace of countless repetitions. She stares at it for a few moments, her expression inscrutable, before handing it to him. He reaches for it eagerly, and its front is revealed to show a fat purple worm. He knows some of the card’s meanings, but this one is new to him.

The Corpse Wyrm, she calls it. Apparently, it comes after the great spilling of blood.

He pauses a moment, almost afraid, but presses forward anyway.

“What does it mean?”, he asks and her expression softens momentarily into something approving. She places a gentle hand on his shoulder before giving him an answer.

“It means that your coming of age will be very painful.”

His blood runs ice cold, but his composure remains. She notices this, and her approval returns, a glimmer of light in the deep abyss of her soul. Releasing her gentle grip on his shoulder, she pulls her hand back to the deck.

The second draw is supposed to foretell his crossroads. This time he recognizes the card as The Dead Man’s Wrath. The figure on its front looks only half real, as if stared at through a haze of smoke. The most notable features he can make out on it are the empty eye sockets still weeping blood, the ruined arm hanging limply at its side, and the tendrils of scarlett scattered across its flesh like stranglevines on a turling tree.

He asks again what it means and this time she does not know. She has never seen it drawn as a crossroad before. It breaks the Pattern.

She draws her third card, the foretelling of his doom, and barely glances at it before revealing it to him. It is a brutal scene, one man ramming a crude spike through his own chest to impale a figure standing behind him. It shocks him less than the previous, even if the image is more visceral. The crone’s eyes sparkle as she watches him study the card, fond recollections reflecting dull in the dark glass of her eyes. It is not difficult to see that she carries a certain fondness for the card.

“Ah. The Price of Vengeance. A kindness, as far as dooms go. At least it gives something back.” ---

Aggral made his way through the smoky haze filling the halls of the human's craft. The insulating coat on the ship’s wiring seemed to have burnt off, the fumes obscuring everything more than a few feet in front of him. He’d put his rebreather on, but without a mask he was forced to choose between using his nictitating membrane and further reducing his visibility or suffering through the burn as the smog hit his eyes.

He chose to suffer. He’d always chosen that. He wasn't sure how to stop.

The path had yet to show any divergences and was connected to the only airlock he could see. It had to lead to the central room of the craft. There’s nowhere else it could go. He wasn't sure how long he’d been walking, but he knew he must be close.

The hall widened abruptly at this thought, as if fulfilling the prophecy of his expectations. He squinted his eyes, trying to discern anything through the blanket of smoke. She appeared then, another prophecy made manifest.

Her eyes were shining red, sclera patterned with the Lichtenberg stripes of ruined capillaries. That same pattern seemed traced, albeit more faintly, down the length of her body, showing on her cheeks, her throat, and her exposed hands. One arm was outstretched, brandishing a large caliber pistol, but it is the one that hangs limp and ruined at her side that terrified him.

She was more than a person at that moment. She was The Dead Man’s Wrath, and he knew he had found his crossroads.

By reflex alone his fingers drew a ward against evil, the sigil steeling his nerves even as it drew the human’s ire. The ruby red eyes of the ship’s captain focused on him, the barrel of her pistol following soon after.

He could see the full bore of the barrel aimed at him, tendrils of rifling swirling into darkness like the accretion disk of a black hole. He could fall into that depth. He could imagine it curling around him, swallowing him whole, sparing him the terror of facing his Pattern.

His thoughts were stopped cold as she spoke.

“You're no merchant,” she stated simply, daring him to deny it.

He didn’t.

“No,” he agreed. “I’m not.”

She hesitated. She’d expected him to lie, to give her a reason. Pilots were like that. Their job didn’t require them to look people in the eyes before pulling the trigger. They weren’t good at it.

He was very good at it. He wished he wasn’t; envies the tremor in her good arm, the way that she couldn't seem to stand having the barrel linger directly on his head.

He’d already made his choice, he realized. He wanted to live. He wanted her to live. He was keenly aware of his doom, aware of how it applied to the woman in front of him. He could imagine her driving that barbed spear through herself, deciding that she'd rather have her vengeance than life. It’s a decision he’d imagined himself making. He hadn’t considered that someone else might make it for him.

“You don’t want to shoot me,” he stated with the same bland tone she had when she pointed out that he was a pirate. It was, perhaps, not the wisest move.

“Oh? And why not? What ace do you have that can threaten the dead and dying, pirate? I got nothin' to lose. Don't fuck with me.”

His hands went up, placating, soothing.

“No ace. No threat,” he stated, taking a deep breath in through his nostrils before continuing. “Just an observation: You don’t want to shoot.”

Her arm didn't lower, but her eyes did. He wasn't sure if it was recollection or shame welling behind those blood tinged eyes. Perhaps a marriage of both.

“Should I? Should I want to? I don't know what part you played in this attack, but I bet it was something big. This room is full of blood you shed.”

He shrugged.

"Shit in one hand, should in the other, tell me which fist fills first. Explaining to your military fleet that I killed two and saved two is still a lot easier than explaining to my pirate clan that I lost everything and got nothing. Helping you is the only way either of us walks out of here."

Her eyes widened at the crassness of the first phrase, then narrowed at the rest. She was furious, the rage practically dripping from her pores. He wasn't afraid of her, but he was disappointed that he blew it that bad. He was going to die here just like the old crone said he would, and it was all because he got fat and greedy.

Then, she laughed. She did that strange thing that humans do, where they alchemize their emotions into new forms and for some reason this moment was hilarious to her. The laughter ripped out of her in peals, like the ringing of a bell, before it melted into a coughing fit as her internal injuries punished her for daring to feel mirth. The same red that stained her eyes now stained her lips.

There was a pause after the coughing stopped, a harsh realization of some sort sticking in her mind. He didn’t need to ask her to voice it, she gave it away willingly.

“I need to get to your nav computer. I don’t think I have much longer before I go unconscious. There’s a carrier nearby, but you won’t find it if I can’t give you coordinates. They always park them in BFE.”

They made it back to his craft in time for her to input the nav coordinates. He actually left her to that, trusting her not to flee without her companions as he walked back down the hallway to retrieve their crumpled forms.

The first one was in terrible shape, but at least he was breathing. To call his wounds gruesome would still be an understatement. The sag to his eyelids and the pooling clear liquid on his cheeks made it clear that his eyes didn’t survive. The internal injuries must have been equally considerable. The second two were worse. They were soft to the touch, not with the gentle give of tissue, but with the wet squish of overripe fruit. He carried them anyway, if for no other reason than that he had the upper body strength to bring all three in one trip.

He made a light jog down the long hall of the ship, only holding back to avoid jostling the injured crew cradled in his arms. When he made it back to his ship, she wasn’t quite unconscious, but the three part cocktail of adrenaline, nerve-blockers, and desperation had faded to a background hum. She was struggling to keep herself upright in the chair, the stripes of red fading to purple even as the surrounding flesh paled.

She was trying to say something but the words weren’t making sense and he didn’t have time to decide if there was something important to them, or if they're just the rambling of someone pushed far past their physical limits.

He looked at the destination she'd set and blanched. It was a massive jump, far too large for him to make a secondary leap afterwards. More important than that, it put him dangerously close to 3C-371. Unless those coordinates were dead on, he’d land on the edge of a black hole, engine overheating, nothing to do but watch in horror as the cosmos' greatest monster crushed even his memory.

There were legends among pirates about the fates of those who perished that way. They claimed that as you fell, time would accelerate to an unbelievable whirl, and you’d watch all the stars in the sky burn to ember before the gravitational forces ripped you apart. Even then, your soul would linger, trapped in the well, forced to wait and watch as hawking radiation boiled your cage away, billions of eons gone before you could rejoin your clan in paradise.

She caught his expression and twitched a hand, a bid to get his attention. It worked, and as he turns to face her, she was able to mouth out the words she was too tired to say.

I’m sure. Go. Now.

He watches her, face inscrutable, for a few seconds more. She moved her eyes from his face to the console and back again twice, desperate, dying.

For fuck's sake.

He grinned a little at the mouthed words, the ferocity of the wounded human winning his reluctant approval. He put a hand up placatingly even as he turned his back to her, punching in the confirmation. The visual from the cockpit warped as the Alcubierre drive stretched space-time tight and thin around the ship, the world strangely silent before the ion drives clicked on, their strange hum a comfort compared to the dead whispers of deep space.

The visual from the cockpit became more blurred the longer they travel, cascades of high energy particles trapping themselves in the gravity well at the foreship. No individual particle was intense enough to be seen, but when clustered together in such a small area, they formed an iridescent cloud, more like the scales of fish than the glow of fireflies.

He watched the cloud with a peculiar focus, hoping to purge worries of the future from his mind. He was having moderate success, but he still found himself hoping that the blast cone of his return to realspace was directed away from the carrier. There was nothing more to that than luck, nothing in the galaxy had the reflexes to guide a ship out of FTL in real time, but he couldn't help but worry that the EMP would be taken as an attack. If that happened, if they decided to shoot first and ask questions later, there wouldn't be enough of him left to-

The HUD flashed red.

Ah. Well. Go time.

His forward visual cleared up immediately as the space-time drive automatically disengaged. The high energy particles discharged from the gravity well like the blast of a scattergun, an almost geometrically perfect cone of ionized gas lighting up the ocean of stars in front of him. His ship's anti-grav strained itself to contain the recoil, the hum of the ion drives buried under the scream of straining steel. There was an imperceivable moment as the last dregs of energy bled from the Alcubierre field, but it was still enough for the readings of the carrier to change from several hundred kilometers to a mere two. Only long years of experience kept him from flinching as the ship filled his screen like the ground rushing up to a skydiver.

The forward afterburners flicked on and the antigrav strained itself yet again as his ship stuttered to a halt. His chemical fuel thrusters were now completely depleted, and the thermal load of the ship was half-and-again above the safe level. His radiator fins had started to melt together under the strain, further limiting the craft's ability to recover and make a second jump.

The ship was helpless. He was helpless.

He couldn't tell what they were thinking at that moment. He couldn't even tell if they had him pinged. All of the equipment responsible for that had been fried by the unholy explosion that was the PMAC's final revenge. The only thing he could do was wait for them to send a comm request.

A few more seconds went by without anything happening. He traced the scar over his stomach nervously, a habit of his anytime death was on the line.

The comm flared to life.

"You are piloting a command ship known to have been stolen by a pirate clan. An unmanned shuttle will be sent to you. You will board it and don the appropriate restraints while under remote surveillance. Failure to do so will result in your death. You will then be transported to the main ship. Life support will be forcibly disabled on your craft after your departure, so attempting to conceal crew aboard the craft will only result in their death. Do you have any questions?"

Aggral's shoulders heaved forward in relief. The fact that they were showing him this level of restraint, already knowing that he was a pirate, was a good sign. He could only bargain up from here.

"I have transported four of your wounded here. I suspect two are already dead. The other two are critically injured. Does this information cause any changes in your procedure?"

There was a pause from the comm engineer on the other side as he processed this.

"Only slightly. You will still need to evacuate the ship before we can send medical personnel in. Just keep in mind that the faster you can remove yourself as an obstacle, the better their outcome will be, and the better their outcome, the better yours will be. The medical shuttle will be following at a safe distance behind your transport. Understood?"

Aggral almost nodded before remembering that it was a voice only channel. A silly gesture. The strain of the last few hours had fried his brain to a crisp. The exhaustion finally caught up to him, leaking into his voice as he gave his affirmation.

"Understood. Hope to be there soon."

The comm officer clearly wasn't used to this kind of informal dialogue, but he didn't seem bad at it. There is no pause this time, the human reaching an almost conversational rhythm in his final message.

"We are very curious to hear about what got you here, pirate. You've clearly got some kind of story to share. Don't get too many of those out here. Fleetcom out."

And from there Aggral was left to the quiet of his thoughts.

That isn't a ship, it's a cannon with FTL

Aggral Thrawn’s gut was a grotesque thing to behold: Soft and distended, covered with a coarse layering of fur, a fat purple worm of a scar crossing over it’s almost spherical circumference. So vicious was the scar that even gazing upon it brought unwanted imagery of the fat ape-like creature screaming in pain, both arms working as a dam to keep the tidal wave of bloody guts from spilling out of its three-fingered fists

Yet, for all its grotesque horror, he trusted it. That same gut that had almost gotten him killed so many years before had worked hard to save him again and again after. It was what had brought him from mere gangpress, to quartermaster, all the way to the captain of his own pirate vessel.

And right now, it was telling him to call off the attack. The readings he was getting from the craft ahead made no sense. The crew space was too small, the energy readings were off the charts, and there was something almost military about it. Yet, as he looked over the hull, he couldn’t spot a single weapon. Nothing about it made sense.

The crew had enough in the larders to pass on a ship this sturdy. Even as ships on either side of him pulled forward, eager to be the first to raid the craft, he aborted the ram sequence to watch from a distance.

The crew was disappointed. It’d been too long since they’d had a good, solid fight, but they knew better than to second guess Aggral’s gut. It had earned its place as the ship’s oracle by rite of blood, and was to be respected accordingly.

---

There were only four crew aboard the USSN PMAC: Dalton Dial, in charge of weapon systems, Elizabeth Harris, in charge of navigation, and the Pratchett siblings, who worked together to keep the fifth generation fusion reactor that powered the whole abomination within some semblance of working order.

The Pratchett siblings’ love of the reactor (which they had affectionately named “Sun-Son”) was rivaled only by their hatred of the rest of the craft. Elizabeth and Dalton had more mixed feelings on the matter. Elizabeth considered the ship “Perhaps a little ridiculous on paper, but a work of military genius,” while Dalton lauded the idea as “Literally the coming of the Messiah, the only thing I prayed for my whole adulthood, and the answer to that prayer manifest, just for me, to bring me back to the flock.”

Their mixed feelings could be explained away just by describing the craft concept:

The PMAC was not a ship. It was the largest possible gun that could still be attached to an Alcubierre drive, with just enough manpower to steer, aim, and maintain the thing for long term patrols.

The prototype MAC that the life-support, thrusters, and reactor had been constructed around hadn’t even been built with space in mind. It was originally designed as a ground-to-orbit defense weapon. If it wasn’t for the capacitor bank the ship would’ve needed almost a minute between each shot to get enough power, even with the fifth generation reactor. Luckily, it could start out each battle with enough charge to fire off a salvo of four before needing to begin recharging for its next launch.

It had just such a salvo prepared for the pirate ambush that their military grade scanners had picked up minutes earlier.

Dalton was not taking the delay very well.

“With all due respect mam, I’ve had a lock on all three for almost a minute now. I could just fire and claim that I sneezed. The Pratchetts would back me up on this. Right guys?”

Emily Pratchett snorted.

“Why is it that when the weaponsmaster says ‘with all due respect’ he always means ‘fuck you for giving my stupidly giant gun blue balls?”

Thom Pratchett shrugged.

“Maybe he’d say it less if you weren’t so eager to translate it to the navigator for him.”

Elizabeth was slightly amused by the conversation. It was hard to keep things particularly formal while on a crew this small. Still, she was waiting for something. She’d gotten permission from the brass to take a new approach to fighting with the ship.

They’d proven it could win battles. Now, it was time to establish shock and awe. And as it currently stood, dead men told no tales.

Thus, they needed more living ones. And as she watched two pirate ships pull forward, with one hanging back, she knew just who’d live to pass on this particular legend. ---

Aggral watched the ships advance on his HUD, the blips crossing the thousands of kilometers between them and the strange ship in seconds. For a moment he felt regret. Was he making a mistake? Was this going to be what led to some upstart in the crew thinking they could do things better than him?

Then, the world went mad.

The power readings on the strange ship spiked. Hard. He’d thought that the baseline levels were outrageous, but they must’ve had some sort of absurd capacitor bank to expel that much energy that fast. The twin prongs that made up most of the length of the ship gave off some sort of EMP that fried the electronics of the Viscera, his sister ship, cutting off their radio traffic. His crew scrambled to find some way to regain contact when Gods of the Dead, forgive me my sins, and and forget me my debts, the actual weapon went off. The EMP hadn’t even been the attack, it had just been a side effect.

He hadn’t seen a weapon because he’d been looking for one on the hull, some kind of guardian laser, or a missile pod. He hadn’t even conceived that the whole goddamn vehicle could be the weapon. But what kind of weapon would charge up like that? A laser would just fire over a sustained period. What would need a burst like-

He stopped midthought as it hit him: A railgun.

He stopped again as it hit them: The kinetic charge would have to have been moving at almost 0.8c for it to just ignore the evasive maneuvers like that. The ferroslug itself wasn’t detected by any of their defense measures aboard, but the thermal readings of the Viscera made every infared sensor aboard scream in horror. Contact with whatever slug had hit it must’ve reduced the whole thing to plasma. It was almost inconceivable.

He was already screaming out the full retreat call when the ship fired twice in rapid succession at the Rictus, which was still recovering from what had just happened to its partner. The first shot was dead through the center. The second hit some target a few dozen meters off to the side.

A direct hit on an escape pod. Apparently, the captain had tried to save himself. Even in the mortal terror that he felt at that moment, Aggral could take a grim satisfaction at that second shot. To leave all the men that followed you to their deaths was a cowardice that he could not bear to consider. He would rather die.

And now, he was going to. Jump was fifteen seconds away, and the console was telling him that the ship was pinged. They knew where he was, they had him in their crosshairs, and they were going to pull the trigger.

He traced a finger over the purple scar absentmindedly. This was it. He’d been living on borrowed time since that first wound, and now he was to meet his ancestors.

He was ready.

---

Dalton was wincing, even as he maintained his ping on the ship. He knew that Elizabeth was just doing her job, but even by his admittedly bloodthirsty standards, there was something fucked up about keeping a ship in ping like this. It was like forcing someone to look you in the eyes before you slit their throat. Way too personal for his tastes.

Elizabeth was keeping an eye on the craft, making sure that no escape pods were jettisoning. Part of her was hoping that some would, but whatever other faults these pirates had, they were loyal to each other at least. As the ultraviolet scanners gave the telltale flair of redshift, she told Dalton to turn off the ping.

To say he was relieved was an understatement. In the middle of a firefight, he couldn’t question Elizabeth’s orders, but for the first time in a long time, he’d been afraid to pull the trigger. Now he didn’t have to.

He almost slid out of his chair as he asked the question that had been on his mind since the engagement began.

“Mam, what the hell was that?”

Elizabeth smiled warmly at her very surprised crew even as her words came out, cold as ice.

“A message.”

---

Thanks for reading this far! I'm moving my previous works from reddit to here. If you follow me, more will come. If you're impatient, you can skip to the source and read things at https://www.reddit.com/user/InBabylonTheyWept/

[ectoentity]

Warped Mirror

Decided to write something based vaguely on the “Spork AU” idea. Instead of Episode 1 Danny meeting Episode 50+ Danny, though, I was curious about a Danny who never became Phantom meeting one who had. This first part is just establishing Human!Danny’s world.

I’ll post it to AO3 when I have the rest of it finished.

---

Three kids stood before a giant machine in the shape of a door. It should have been humming along and glowing green, with a great hole to another world in the middle. Instead, it was cold and silent. 

“They spent years working on it,” Danny explained, “and then nothing. Mom and Dad have been moping in their room all day.”

Tucker looked around at the portal and the hodgepodge of computer parts attached to it. “It’s probably a loose wire somewhere. I’m sure they’ll figure it out.”

“In the meantime, this would make for an awesome picture,” Sam said with a smile. She held up her polaroid camera. 

“Oh no, you’re not getting me anywhere near that,” Tucker immediately walked away from the portal.

“Come on! When they get this thing working we’ll never be allowed near it. Besides, it’s not like it’s going to do anything right now.”

“Then why don’t you get over there and let one of us take the picture?” Tucker asked.

“Because neither of you know anything about lighting or framing a shot. Please?” When she saw that Tucker was not going to budge, she looked over at Danny with wide, pleading eyes. 

He looked anxiously at the portal. So far none of his parents’ inventions had really worked, but that didn’t mean that they weren’t dangerous. Still, Sam was right. It was pretty cool, and getting a picture with the thing could be a good way to keep a memory.

“Yeah, okay, let me put on a jumpsuit in case there’s a live wire or something.”

Ten minutes later he was suited up in the white-and-black safety jumpsuit his parents had made for him. It wasn’t really a hazardous materials outfit - there was no full hood or respirator, or even goggles. It was made of something that was supposed to repel ectoplasm and certain chemicals that his parents used and was insulated against minor shocks, so it would have to do. 

“Oh, no no. I’m not taking your picture while you’re wearing that,” Sam announced. Danny was about to argue, but she reached over and pulled the sticker of his dad’s face off of the suit. “Now you’re good.”

Danny laughed. “Good thinking, Sam. Wouldn’t want to be immortalized in your photos with that on me.” He walked up to the portal. It was a massive piece of machinery, nearly six feet in diameter and deep enough to fit a car. He paused at the entrance. It was hard to imagine it as anything other than a creepy machine in the basement. If it had worked, it would have opened into a whole other world. 

Tucker, meanwhile, was watching while anxiously tapping a foot. He had expected Danny to give in to Sam’s pleas. He was so predictable and utterly clueless. One of these days they would both realize that they were both desperately crushing on each other and they’d-

There was something plugged into the wall. Tucker wasn’t sure what it was, but he had a bad feeling about it. 

“Hold up!” he shouted. Tucker went over and unplugged the cord from the wall outlet, and checked around for more outlets just in case. When he didn’t find anything else, he called back, “Okay, I think it’s alright now.”

“Good thinking, Tuck,” Danny’s voice echoed in the portal. “Hey, Sam, is this good?”

Sam set up her shot. “Looks great! Just hold there a second.” She counted down before the flash went off. The camera whirred and produced a polaroid. “Lemme take a couple more,” she said before swiftly doing so from slightly different angles. “That should be good!”

Danny started to walk out of the portal. Something caught his foot. He tripped and fell backwards, flailing his arms wildly in hopes that he would catch something. His right hand hit the side of the portal. It stabilized him for a second, but then the wall clicked. Danny stared down at his hand, a chill lancing up his spine. He hadn’t hit the wall. His hand was resting on a button marked “ON.”

“Oh my god,” he blurted.

“Danny? Are you okay?” Sam called. He could hear them both scrambling toward the portal. 

“I’m good! I just tripped!” Danny got out of the portal as fast as he could. “My parents put the on/off buttons on the inside! If Tucker hadn’t unplugged it…” All three teens stared at the portal. Danny could have died, just for tripping over a stupid wire.

Finally Tucker gulped and broke the silence. “Want to see if your parents can get it to work now?”

Danny shook himself out of it. “Yeah! I’ll go ask if they forgot about that.”

They all but ran out of the lab.

---

The Fenton RV sped down the street, ghost alarms blaring. In the back, Danny got his weapons together as quickly as he could with all the jostling and swerving. They’d let Dad drive; time was of the essence.

“A level six!” Jack crowed from the driver’s seat. “Maybe even a seven! How long’s it been since we saw one like that?”

“About four months,” Danny grumbled. He still vividly remembered when the town had been drawn into the Ghost Zone and besieged with an army of skeleton constructs. He was not looking forward to a repeat of that hell. The Fenton Blaster in his hands whined as he attached the power source. 

“We’ll have to be careful, Jack,” Mom cautioned as she always did. “We don’t have the Ecto-Skeleton this time.”

“Are you sure we shouldn’t call in the Guys in White?” Danny asked. They might not be the best ghost hunters, but they did have a lot more firepower.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Danny! I’m sure we can take care of this before they even notice something’s happening. Besides, your mom and I are still dealing with the paperwork from the last time they showed up.”

Danny shuddered. He was extremely glad that he didn’t have to deal with that aspect of ghost hunting. 

His dad pulled up to the mall with a loud honk of the horn and squealing tires. Danny and his mom ran out, blasters held at the ready. Dad backed them up with one of the Fenton Bazookas. 

The mall was already evacuated. Some people milled around outside, anxiously talking amongst themselves. In the year and a half since the ghosts had started attacking the town, people had gotten frustratingly complacent about them. The invasion a few months back had shown most people just how dangerous they could be, but a stubborn few always were more concerned with getting good pictures than their own safety. 

“Make way!” Mom shouted. “We’re here to take care of the ghost!” The crowd at least did part for them. A few people shouted at them. Some of it was words of support. A few tried to describe what they had seen - it was green, it was wearing all white, it was terrifying. Only a few made jokes or jeered at the Fentons as they passed. That was annoying, but it was a hell of a lot better than it had been a year ago. 

The deserted mall was an eerie sight. Everyone had left in a hurry, leaving lights on and store music still echoing through empty halls. The Fentons’ footsteps seemed far too loud. The weirdest part was that everything seemed intact. When the technology ghost raided the mall he usually left trails of rubble and discarded packaging everywhere. The box ghost would leave piles of everything that he dumped out of his beloved boxes. Various other ghosts had attacked the mall in the past, and they almost always left signs of their passing. Why was this one different?

“Come out, ghost!” Dad shouted, his voice easily carrying through the empty mall. “Let’s make this quick!”

“Curious.” The voice was quiet, but had the same unnatural echo of all ghosts. Danny held up his blaster, but he couldn’t tell where the voice had come from. Beside him, his mom turned on her miniature Fenton Finder. It beeped alarmingly quickly. 

“Two o’clock!” Mom shouted as she fired. Danny was only a moment slower, trying to fire a little ahead. The blasts didn’t connect with anything. 

“I mean no harm,” the ghost said. Its voice was way too close for comfort. Danny turned to his right and shot where he thought it was, but he still missed. 

“What do you want?” Danny asked. He didn’t really care. No matter what their obsessions were, ghosts only ever wanted to spread chaos and pain. Still, sometimes he could distract them by talking back. 

The ghost appeared in front of them. It was tall, with dark, green-tinged skin and a lighter beard. Its eyes glowed a soft yellow. A white robe and hood covered most of its body, rippling in a nonexistent breeze. 

A green beam from the Fenton Bazooka blasted towards the ghost. Its torso split apart to allow the beam to go through it. Danny grimaced. It was so gross when they did that. He followed his dad’s lead and started shooting the ghost. The ghost blocked all of his and Mom’s shots with a series of small green shields. 

“This is entirely unnecessary,” the ghost huffed. It had the audacity to look bored. 

“Then why not just go back to the Ghost Zone and leave us alone?” Danny shouted, annoyed. He ran off to the side, flanking the ghost. It finally started dodging the ectoblasts. If anything, though, the ghost just looked amused. 

“Oh, I shall. First, though…” The ghost flung its hand out towards Danny. He winced, anticipating the burn of ectoblasts. He took a step back and his foot sank. With a shout, he fell into the glowing green portal that had opened right behind him.

[amiedala]

SOMETHING DEEPER

CHAPTER 3: Without Armor

RATING: Explicit (18+ ONLY!!!)

WARNINGS: sexual content, violence

SUMMARY: “You’re an excellent leader. Tell me what to do.”

“Nova—”

“Prove it,” she whispers, her voice barely air. Her blood is pumping so heavily in her ears that her own words sound distorted, like they’re under a waterfall. “Show me you’re a good leader. Because I believe you are, but I know you have to prove it to believe it.”

“This isn’t what this place was made for.”

Nova stops, her forehead pressed against his. Everything in this strange arena is quiet except for their breathing, an urgent pulsing in the cold, dark night. “So fighting is sacred to Mandalorians,” she breathes, feeling the airlocks that keep Din’s helmet secure around his face hiss. He doesn’t move, letting her lift off his helmet, to have him without his armor. “You’re sacred to me. Every inch of you.”

If you're a newcomer, my fic "Something More" is the first installment of this story! <3

AUTHOR’S NOTE: hello hello my friends!!! this is where i offer a deep, massive apology for Chapter 3 coming out a week later than it was supposed to. i was traveling to visit my best friend who lives states away, then my family had a slew of emergencies and crises, then i was too drained with a flareup of pain to write a single word. writing SD is literally my happy place, and being forced to take an unplanned break was painful and hard. this chapter isn't as long as i wanted it to be (i'm so sorry for that as well!!!) but i think it's as fleshed out as i can get it, because, as usual, Big Things Are Coming. thank you so so much for being patient with me in my hasty, largely unexplained absence, and i hope you LOVE this week's chapter!! <3

*

Hoth really shouldn’t feel warm and welcoming. The climate is horrible, temperatures that drop to dangerous lows, the ice that breaks and shifts and opens into the gaping maw of the planet’s icy interior. It’s a wasteland, white-blind and horrible, but the small Rebel base located in the heart of the planet is enough to keep Nova’s heart anchored here, even when she’s parsecs away.

Landing Kicker isn’t an issue. The second they descend onto the landing pad, a small crew of the mechanics Nova spent most of her brief stint here with racing towards the underbelly. Nova waves at them, pointing over the noise at the makeshift patch on the mainline of fuel, and they nod, enclosing on the issue in a matter of seconds.

Din’s tense. Nova’s eyes roam over the silhouette of his impressive, taut body, knowing that most of what’s underneath the beskar is in fighting mode, ready to expel energy like a hurricane whenever he faces the opposition. He tilts the visor over at her, and Nova offers a tiny smile, her heart kicking an arrhythmic beat against her chest. She’s trying her best to not look relieved that she’s here and not on Mandalore, but she knows she’s a horrible liar and that her body is full of betrayal. When the airlock doors hiss open and the two of them are beckoned into the insulated hollow of the Rebel base, Wedge is there waiting. Behind him, like a silent sentinel, stands Bo-Katan, her owl-painted blue helmet obscuring the expression on her face.

“Rebel girl,” Wedge calls, and something cold in Nova’s heart thaws. His arms are strong and purposeful, and he envelops Din’s hand with that same warmth and vigor, nodding at him. Bo-Katan doesn’t move an inch, her pristine hands folded behind her back, every muscle in her body the same kind of tight and purposeful as Din’s are, Mandalorian strong. “Welcome back.”

“It’s—” Nova inhales, eyes flicking, uncertain, over at Bo-Katan, “good…to be back. I wish it was under better circumstances, but—”

“You’re Andromeda Maluev,” Bo-Katan interrupts, and the mention of her old name sends a spike straight through Nova’s chest, puncturing on scar tissue that’s never fully healed. “Aren’t you?”

Nova swallows, running her tongue over her bottom lip. “I was,” she answers, finally, voice far away and small. “Why do you ask?”

Bo-Katan gestures with her head, a tiny movement, and then she’s turning on her beskar heel to move towards the war room. Silently, Nova and Din follow behind her and Wedge, Nova’s heart still hammering, erratic. The space is smaller than the giant one on Mandalore, but because it’s empty except for the four of them, it seems massive. Dangerous. Lonely.

Nova steps up to the holotable, twisting her tongue behind her teeth, trying to remain calm. The mention of her old name, twice in less than a week, feels like shrapnel. It reminds her of everything she’s been running from for a decade—her parents’ deaths, Jacterr Calican, the Empire, the resurrected evil in the First Order—and it sits sourly in her stomach as Bo-Katan presses buttons on the holotable. When the image of Nova comes up—so much younger than she feels now, dark hair long against her back, her features glitched and glittering in the hologram projected towards the ceiling—she winces at it. Beneath her portrait, her name is written in Basic: ANDROMEDA MALUEV. AGE: 26. CRIMES: EVADING CAPTURE, MURDER, AIDING AND ABETTING CRIMINALS. It’s bold and terrifying and Nova can’t look away. The word MURDER, screaming at her in capital letters, is too much to bear. She swallows, throat dry, blood rushing in her ears. It’s such a dangerous, horrible thing that it takes Nova a minute to read anything beneath the portrait of a girl she hasn’t been in years, but when she finally gets past the roadblock—MURDER, MURDER, MURDER—she sees a price on her head.

“Five million credits?” she asks, her voice rocketing through three octaves in her disbelief. The word credits cracks down the middle, incredulous. She presses a hand to her mouth, flattening her fingers flush against her face, trying to steady herself. “Why—why is the bounty so high?”

“That’s not from the First Order,” Wedge starts, gently, but he’s interrupted by Bo-Katan’s knife of an arm, cutting up between him and Nova. She jabs a long, gloved finger at the script underneath Nova’s image and her bounty, and Nova blinks hard, trying to get her brain to focus on what the words say.

“Novalise,” Bo-Katan says, her voice clipped, “you’re wanted alive or dead. Do you see that?” She enunciates her point with her finger again, stabbing it on the shimmering blue words reflected in front of them. “This is from the fucking Guild.”

“Easy,” Din cuts in, the word hard in the air. He steps forward, knocking Bo-Katan’s angry hand out of where it’s shaking in Nova’s face. “Take it the fuck down, Bo-Katan, or I will do it for you.”

“The—Guild?” Nova asks, trying to make all of the moving parts fit right in her brain. “I—I don’t understand. The Bounty Hunters’ Guild? The one that Greef Karga runs? I—I’m wanted? Why?”

“You’re not,” Din interrupts, his voice clipped and intense. Nova shuffles to the side as Din steps towards the holotable, magnifying the strange text. “It’s not Karga’s Guild. And you,” he adds, shoulders tossed back, facing Bo-Katan, “had no right to yell at her with those theatrics. Save that for the enemy.”

Nova can’t see Bo-Katan’s face, hidden under the blue beskar of her helmet, but she knows that Bo-Katan is glaring daggers at the both of them. Nova swallows again, trying to keep her heart rate steady, her racing mind calm, but she just keeps seeing the word MURDER flash before her eyes. Din’s saying something else, and she can’t concentrate, turning her body away from the three of them, staring off at the ice that makes up every corner of this room, clear and dangerous. She closes her eyes—MURDER, MURDER, MURDER—and opens them again, just as rapidly.

Inhaling shakily, Nova starts counting the deaths she’s been responsible for on her long, shaking fingers. Her skin, usually so warm and radiant, is fallow and pallid in the low light. Her thumb sticks up first, wearing Jacterr’s name. It wasn’t intentional, she tries to console herself, but her hands are still quivering. It was an accident. She didn’t mean for the lightsaber to ignite. She didn’t even know she had the power to do that, let alone use it as a weapon. It was self-defense, killing him before he had the chance to kill her. And then there were all of the faceless troopers in the TIE fighters she shot at when trying to get out alive. For years, hordes of them, shooting back at them before they had the chance to blow her to smithereens or capture her for something worse. You’ve never shot first, Nova tries to reason with herself, eyes focused on the outline of her boots, old and worn, warm against the icy floor of the room she’s standing in. It was all self-defense.

Except, that tiny little voice in the back of her mind whispers, insidious and awful, you killed Xi’an all on your own. Nova’s heart hangs heavy in her chest, like it’s on trial. She tries to inhale, but there’s no air in this ridiculous ice block of a room, and everything is purple and wounded, the imprint of Xi’an’s cold, dead body embedded on the back of her eyelids. That could be argued as self-defense, too, Nova tries to rationalize, but the reminder of the bullet that hit her wicked body head-on is still so horrible in her head. Logically, Nova knows that the only reason that she shot and killed Xi’an was because Din would have died if it weren’t for that bullet, and that Xi’an hurt her husband in ways she’d never felt fully comfortable asking about, but it’s still a dead body on her hands. Her gorgeous, terrible, radiant, shaking hands.

“I g—I gotta go,” Nova mumbles, and then her feet are carrying her out of the war room, into the hallway. They’ve put up more insulation since the time she lived here for a few weeks, when Din and Grogu left her and the world stopped turning, but the recognition of it barely registers in Nova’s mind as she sprints through the empty hallways, picking up her feet so that they don’t tangle in the loose generator wires curled across the floor. It only takes a few more turns, and then she’s through the airlock, back out into the frozen climate of Hoth’s exterior, her heart hammering something horrible, her pulse erratic, her blood pressure high and dangerous. Slowly, she sinks onto the frozen ground, right outside of the door, pressing her bare hands into the snow, trying to calm anything back to its usual resting place.

It’s freezing out here. Nova’s still in her outfit from Ahch-To, and even though her pants are lightweight and the cold cuts straight through, she’s not getting wet from the snow. Her upper body is slightly warmer, fabric of her shirt protective, the shawl wound tightly over her shoulders, flapping slightly in the wind.

“Nova,” a voice behind her cuts through the silence, and Nova turns at the sound of her name, breath stuck somewhere between her chest and her mouth. Din’s standing there, tall and stately. “Are you okay?” he asks, and the timbre of his voice makes it very clear that he knows full well that she’s not okay.

“Why?” she manages, and then she’s being hauled to her feet, Din’s gloved hands warm and steady around her waist. “Why is there a bounty on my head—alive or dead?” She blinks against a loose lock of hair blowing in her face, and before she can react to it, Din’s already tucking it gently behind her ear. “I thought the Order wanted me—”

“I don’t know,” Din interrupts gently. “I don’t know why you have any of these charges on your head, or why there’s a bounty at all. Gideon and everyone we’ve interacted with associated with the First Order always insisted that you would work for them, not that you were to be eliminated. I don’t know who put the charges out there, but we’re going to fix it. I’m never going to let anyone touch you.”

Nova looks straight up at the visor, swaying slightly in the frosty breeze. Her head hurts. Her scar aches. The pressure that’s constantly blossoming on her shoulder blades feels incredibly heavy, and even though the wind is frozen through, it makes her heart burn for Ahch-To—its gorgeous greenness, its holy ground—and Nova just stares at her own, unhinged reflection in Din’s helmet.

Her teeth press down onto her bottom lip before she can muster up the strength to speak. One of Din’s gloved hands is pressed protectively against the small of her back, and the other is holding her right cheek, a fortification, a promise. Nova looks desperately into the visor, trying to see straight through to Din’s brown eyes. Her voice is barely there when she’s able to talk. “How?”

Bo-Katan’s helmet is off by the time Nova feels stable enough to walk back inside. The airlock door hisses shut behind them, and Wedge is the one that Nova catches first. He’s outfitted in his regular orange jumpsuit, but the spark that usually burns behind his eyes is replaced by a sadness that Nova’s never seen before. He offers her a small smile, beckoning into the room, but she knows his mind is racing just as quickly as hers is, and when she looks at the holotable, the horrible image of her isn’t projected anymore. She inhales once, exhales, and tries to coax her heart back to a normal rhythm.

“Novalise—”

“It’s okay,” Nova whispers, nodding in Bo-Katan’s direction without looking at her. “You—you were right to call us here. I’m just…” she trails off, a small glint of light catching the stone on her ring finger, and she sighs. “I was taken by surprise. That was—I wasn’t expecting it. I know the First Order wants me. I know that my…powers, however mysterious as they are, make me valuable, and that makes me dangerous. But I don’t understand who wants me dead if it’s not the people we’ve been running from for the last year.”

Bo-Katan steps forward, uncrossing her lean, muscled arms. Silently, she pulls up the shimmering holograms again, but this time, Nova’s bounty doesn’t come up. It’s not anything recognizable until Bo-Katan points to a blue, rotating sphere. “I think,” she finally says, her tone unreadable, “that whoever put this bounty up on you wants your face out there in a bigger capacity than what it already is. You’re known in the Alliance, obviously, and now you’re known on Mandalore.” She stabs her finger at the hologram of the planet, rotating in silence. “And you’re wanted by the First Order, for whatever horrible plans they have next. But whoever this other force is—”

Nova holds up a hand, and, miraculously, Bo-Katan stops talking. “They want me to be a martyr,” she whispers, and all three of them look over at her with various expressions of disbelief. Din’s face is still hidden underneath his helmet, but Nova knows exactly what the contours of his features look like right now. Wedge’s worry lines deepen, dark and troubled. Bo-Katan raises one sculpted eyebrow, but her eyes focus on Nova’s like she knows it’s the truth.

“What did Luke say?” Wedge asks, finally.

“I don’t see how that’s relevant right now,” Bo-Katan interjects, but Wedge holds up a hand. It’s so sharp in contrast to his usual easygoing demeanor that her mouth snaps back shut.

“Nova’s a Jedi,” Wedge continues, eyes drifting to the lightsaber hanging off her belt. “Or at least she’s going to be,” he amends, “so she’s rare. One of three still existing that I know of, so that makes her incredibly important. Luke has been off on his own the last few years, trying to piece back the history of the Jedi that got lost or erased in the war. And that’s the Skywalker family lightsaber she has right there,” Wedge continues, nodding again at Nova’s belt loop, “so I know she went to go see him. What did he say, rebel girl?” he asks again, and Nova exhales lowly through the tiny gap of her open mouth.

“He knows something is coming,” Nova manages, finally. “He wanted—he wanted me to stay and train. He’s trying to locate all of the remaining Jedi in the galaxy, to try and rebuild what got destroyed. And,” she continues, exhaling, “he told me that what died may not stay dead.”

“Well,” Bo-Katan interjects, huffing, “that’s incredibly cryptic and entirely unhelpful.”

“Don’t start,” Wedge snaps, an edge to his voice. “Did he mean Gideon?”

Nova slowly shakes her head. It’s the truth, even though, to Bo-Katan’s point, Luke was being cryptic when he gave her that particularly sage warning. It’s not Gideon. Luke was talking about something deeper. “No,” she whispers, finally. “He meant someone—or something—much worse.”

Bo-Katan raises another eyebrow, a scorn so distasteful it makes waves on her face. “Yet another cryptic and unhelpful point, Novalise.”

Din steps forward before the expression on Nova’s face even changes. Bo-Katan Kryze doesn’t cower much, but she sure as hell shrinks underneath Din’s stance. He’s all anger, electric wires running currents throughout his entire tense body. Even the beskar pales in comparison to his rage. His hand slips to his own waistline, and Bo-Katan’s startled eyes glaze over the Darksaber before she backs down.

Nova has no idea how to diffuse this situation. Maybe Din’s right, maybe she is an expert at getting out of things, but the mountain crushing down on top of her shoulders just keeps growing bigger and bigger. Soon, it’ll be the size of Mandalore, and then she’ll have two planets to try and keep balanced on her already aching back. Nova rubs at the sore spot between her eyebrows, trying to worry out the knot that’s been growing in intensity there.

Bo-Katan’s talking again. Nova registers it, faintly, in the back of her mind. She’s long since grown tired of running, but right now, all her legs want to do is make a break for it. She’s exhausted and frozen in place and so unsteady on her feet. All Nova craves right now, this very second, is to lay back down in the piles of frigid snow outside and let it cool down her body right to the core. Din’s voice is angry, direct, curling in waves through the modulator, and when Nova whips back around to face the three of them, somehow, miraculously, they all grow silent.

“They want me to be a martyr,” Nova repeats, her voice barely anything in the chill of the chamber. Wedge’s thick eyebrow raises, his careful eyes searching over her face, trying to find her angle. “I’m not going to be. But I’m also not going to sit and wait on Mandalore for them to come find me, whoever they are. I’m not going to make it easy for them. Besides,” she finishes, eyes locking on Din’s, even under the obscurity of his helmet, “I’m a Rebel. Laying low isn’t in my blood.”

“Maybe,” Bo-Katan says, and there’s a razor’s edge to her already sharp voice. Something is wrong, Nova knows that, because underneath all of that icy venom, there’s a tremble that ricochets through her words. “But you’re forgetting something. You aren’t just a Rebel anymore. You’re the queen of a planet—”

“I’m a figurehead,” Nova spits back, exasperated. Maker above, her head is seriously killing her. Somewhere, distantly, she aches for the quiet crush of hyperspace, the dazzle, the glimmer, the flair of it all. Out there, running didn’t feel like running. And out there, home actually felt like home. “I’m nothing. I’m married to the Mand’alor, that’s it. I don’t rule. I don’t interact with anybody but the two of you. I wear Mandalore colored clothes, sometimes I’m in the war room, but most of the time, I’m staring up at the sky, and I can’t see the stars. I cannot see,” she continues, her voice unhinging into something desperate, “a single star from the planet’s surface. Bo-Katan, Mandalore is a ghost town. There’s only a handful of people left. Why did you battle Din for power in the first place,” she finishes, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes, “if this was all that it was for?”

The room is silent. Nova can barely see straight, her eyes burning with the tears she’s trying to hold back. Bo-Katan looks like she’s been wounded—not pissed off, not royally wronged—wounded. Hurt. It’s written in the fracture lines of her face, and even though she’s been cold and hostile and a pain in everyone’s asses, Nova aches knowing she put them there. “Because,” Bo-Katan says, finally, and her voice isn’t icy anymore. It’s flat. Monotonous. “I love Mandalore. And I wanted something more.”

Nova inhales shakily, letting her shoulders round, clutching her arms around herself. The shawl wrapped around her upper body has fallen down to her shoulders, her loose hair flying in curls around her face. She’s exhausted. Behind her, she can feel Din stepping forward, his presence like a locus, an orbiting star. She staggers backward, mouth struck open, unable to conjure any words to fix this. “Bo-Katan—”

“Maybe I was wrong,” Bo-Katan interrupts, and her regular permafrost is back. “Maybe I was wrong about you. You’re right. You’re not a ruler. You’re a figurehead, Andromeda.” Nova recoils as if Bo-Katan slapped her. Slapping her would be better, actually, because the gut punch that comes with the stab of her old name is almost too much to bear. “And you’re sure as hell not a Mandalorian.”

Nova closes her eyes at the impact, but Din shoves his body forward, the whoosh of the Darksaber igniting in his hand before Nova can react. When she finally opens them, Din is standing like the warrior he is, like the bounty hunter he used to be. The horrible, flickering blade is up in front of Bo-Katan, an inch from her throat.

“I agreed to do this job because you insisted. I only promised to follow through if you were in my corner.” Din’s hand doesn’t waver once. Nova watches, horrified, as the terrible blade crackles and hisses in the low, cold light. “You intentionally disrespecting my wife is the opposite of being in my corner. If you ever,” he continues, and Nova can hear the grit of his teeth through the modulator, “use that name to refer to her again, those words will be your last. Do you understand me?”

Bo-Katan stares up at him, all malice. “You’re playing with fire.”

“Believe me,” Din spits, voice even and dangerous, “you haven’t been burned by me yet.”

Finally, she steps down, jutting her chin downward in a very reluctant nod. “Maybe you’re not a Mandalorian,” she concedes, staring back at Nova. Nova’s frozen to the spot, arms hugged tightly against her chest, knees shaking from the proverbial impact, “but Mandalore is still your home. For now, at least. And until we figure out who’s after you, that’s where you’ll stay. No Rebel missions. No alone time out in the stars.” She stares up at Din. “You wanted me in your corner? Fine. But your corner is on Mandalore, and Mandalore only.”

“I can’t do that,” Nova manages, quietly, her teeth aching in her mouth. “I need to train, Bo-Katan, I—I need to go see Grogu, I’m a commander in the Alliance, I cannot be grounded on a planet indefinitely, not with the entire galaxy on the brink of another war, not while there are two groups of people who want me dead or to be their slave—”

“Your home,” Bo-Katan interjects, her eyes dangerous behind her solid voice, “is on Mandalore now. What better place to protect you than a planet full of born and bred warriors?”

Nova’s heart is in her throat. It aches, pulsing and twisting and waning, like she has a knife lodged in her esophagus. “I can’t stay there indefinitely, I—I’m a Jedi—”

“No,” Bo-Katan interrupts again, “you are not. Not yet, and not until we figure out what danger the Order and these bounty hunters are to the rules of Mandalore. Besides,” she tacks on, leaning back on her heels, “Mandalorians and Jedi do not get along.” Her glance that flickers over to Din’s intimidating, awful silhouette, the Darksaber a ruthless weapon in his capable hands, is the only thing that gives away all the fear she’s tucked away under all that venom.

“Ahsoka Tano,” Nova manages, and something painful runs through the hard lines on Bo-Katan’s face. “You led us to Ahsoka. So no matter what you’re telling us right now, I know that you get along with at least one Jedi better than you think.”

Bo-Katan stares back at her. For a horrible beat, nobody breathes. Nova’s almost forgotten Wedge is still in the room until he lets out a quiet, exhausted sigh. “We’re going back to Mandalore. Wedge will run the Rebel operation from here, with people who aren’t responsible for a planet and the next collective fight of the galaxy. You leave Mandalore,” she says, and this time her gaze is trained expertly on Din’s visor, “you’re on your own.”

“Stop,” Wedge says, finally, and the singular word shatters through the tension, bringing everything down to the icy floor in one fell swoop. “Stop it. You,” he says, pointing at Bo-Katan, “were in here less than a month ago talking about unity, wanting to build something better, to protect the galaxy. I never thought we’d be close friends, Bo-Katan, but I at least thought you were on our side.” He lets the intention hang there, before turning to Din. “You are an incredible warrior, Din. I think Nova was right about you being a good leader. I think you have great potential. But I’ve seen power easily go sideways, and if you keep fighting against your own, you’re going to end up in another war. And you,” he enunciates heavily, turning on Nova, “you’re the best person I know. Kindest heart I’ve ever seen, except maybe for Luke. You’re an incredible pilot, a fantastic Rebel, and I don’t doubt for a second that you can save the galaxy from whatever evil it brings. But you’re not immortal, Nova. You’re not a saint, or a god, or anything bigger than a human being. Bo-Katan is right about one thing, and that’s you being in danger. They want you to be a martyr? Don’t let them make that a reality.” He pauses, and there’s something ancient in his eyes. “Go back to Mandalore. Work with each other, in whatever capacity that means. And when the three of you realize that we’re all in this together, no matter what threat we’re facing next, then you get to call the shots again.” He lets that hang in the air too, and it’s so heavy with genuine care, Nova’ heart breaks over itself again. “And I don’t make a habit of saying this, but may the Force be with us all.” His gaze roams over the three of them again, and Nova swallows, nodding against Wedge’s words. “We’re certainly going to need it.”

Mandalore is deadly and quiet.

It doesn’t welcome the three of them back in open arms. Bo-Katan’s ship is so much sleeker than Kicker, but Nova revels in the groan and tumble her starfighter makes when it touches down on cool, ashy earth. Her teeth are still shaking in her mouth. She has a headache, one she can feel in her jaw, right down to the bone. No one has spoken since Wedge gave his rebel rousing speech back on Hoth, and Nova knows that nothing she can manage can top that one. She’s silent in her flying, her disembarking. Slowly, she and Din trail Bo-Katan up the marble steps of the palace, and Nova can barely remember to offer her usual smile at the guards before the tall, impressive doors snap shut.

“I meant what I said,” Bo-Katan offers, finally, and there’s a wicked set in her jaw. “I can’t protect you out there. Mandalore is my home. I’m not abandoning this planet to run after the two of you and your masochistic need to save the galaxy. It’s been through enough, and I’m not going to let either of you ruin that. I meant it.”

Nova stares at her. She wants to snap back, to repeat what Wedge said, to shake some sense into Bo-Katan’s tense shoulders, but she doesn’t. She left all of her vitriol and fire back on Hoth, and she’s so incredibly tired. It’s nearly impossible to remember that DIn only took the throne a little over two weeks ago, that the ragtag group of their collected rebel fighters seemed so confident that they could stop the First Order, take down the evil lurking there, and restore peace to the galaxy. “So did I,” Nova whispers, finally, and Bo-Katan blinks uncharacteristically, a tiny slip in her usual armor before she opens her mouth again.

“We’ll talk more about this tomorrow,” Bo-Katan allows, and then she turns on her beskar heel and walks off somewhere in the dark haunt of the castle, her steps receding into nothing but dread.

Nova’s scar hurts. These days, it always seems to hurt, this horrible sucking wound that still aches, an aftershock of a trauma long gone. She sighs, long and heavy, wanting to sink into bed for a day or two and sleep all this responsibility off. She wants to be back up there in the stars, moving from planet to planet with purpose. She wants to use the lightsaber hanging from her belt. She wants to hug Grogu to her chest, to feel his tiny green body give off that special kind of warmth. She wants to lay with Din without armor, the rest of the world falling away.

When she finally manages to pull her heavy head up, Din is staring at Nova in the silence. There’s only a small strike of moonlight cutting across the strange, blue floor. He’s still wearing his helmet, but she can practically cut straight through the shield by the way she can feel his eyes piercing hers. This aches, too, such small hurts that accumulate across the map of her body.

“Come with me,” he says, finally, and when he reaches out his familiar, steady hand, she takes it.

It’s quiet in the palace, as per usual, but something about the moon striking through the windows as they move through the empty halls feels loud and haunting. Quietly, Din and Nova walk, hand in hand, past the throne room, past the staircase that leads to their massive bedroom, into the maze of corridors in the yawning belly of the beast. The amphitheatre is massive, something holy in its own right. Mandalorians treat battle like it’s divine, and the giant stadium built into their palace is made of marble and blue stone, the sky open and glittering above the arena.

“Why are we here?” Nova asks, finally, breaking the silence holding the both of them captive.

“Because,” Din answers, his voice level, leading her to the center of the ring, “this is where I won the Darksaber.”

Nova raises a dark eyebrow at him, and even though Din’s face is still obscured by the helmet, she can feel his face softening. “I know, mighty Mand’alor,” she deadpans, her own voice gentle, “I was there for the fight of the century, remember?”

“Stop it,” he interjects, but there’s no venom in his tone. She smiles, relaxing slightly, letting her aching shoulders drop. “I meant this is where it started. When we stood here, you said you thought I could be a good ruler. A fair one. Someone people would listen to.”

“I still think that,” she echoes, and Din’s fingers flutter over the makeshift hood of her shawl, dropping the blue fabric so that her hair falls loose. There shouldn’t be a breeze in here, but something rustles Nova’s long curls, letting them spiral over her right shoulder. “Actually, I know it—”

“I’m not,” Din interrupts, and Nova watches his movements, how calculated they are, how he’s pacing back and forth in the pit around her. It’s empty in here except for the two of them, but there’s some strange sense of exhibition, as if they’re being watched. “I’m not a good leader, Nova, because I’m not a leader. Bo-Katan told me Mandalore doesn’t take kindly to outsiders, but you were right earlier. This place is a ghost town. Besides the people who live and work in the palace, I’ve never seen anyone in the village. I’ve spent hours in the war room just looking at the maps, trying to figure out where all of the Mandalorians are.” He sighs, and Nova chances a half-step forward. “There aren’t any. They’ve either fled, been killed, or have left Mandalore to hide on other planets, like my covert.”

“Din,” Nova starts, but when he holds up a single gloved hand, the words die on her tongue.

“There’s nothing here left to rule,” he says, finally, like the words are both an incredible burden and the truth that sets him free. “Mandalore is gone. Whatever it used to be, whoever used to live here, what we see is all that’s left. Maybe I am meant to rule this planet full of nobody, I don’t know. Maybe this is some sort of strange...riddle that I can’t figure out. But I can’t understand why it’s so imperative for the two of us to step into these roles, to follow rules that make no sense, to try and be a leader for a planet that’s barely anything.”

Nova stares at him. A small smile winges across her lips before she even realizes why. “You don’t want to stay here,” she whispers, which is an echo of the same sentiment she’s been saying for weeks, but this time it feels like the truth laid bare. “You want to be where the fight is.”

Din’s quiet. His shoulders are still rigid. “I don’t run from things.”

“True.” Nova steps another foot towards him, her head cocked to the side, trying to puzzle out what’s happening in his head without seeing a glimpse of his face. “That’s usually my M.O.”

“Stop it,” Din whispers, but there’s no fire left in his voice. Nova studies him—his stature, his stance, the Darksaber hanging off his hip, the proverbial crown balanced over his helmet—but there’s nothing hardened there, nothing sharp, regardless of how regal he is, how his presence cuts through every room like a knife. When she’s finally close enough to touch him, her hands immediately go to his helmet, pressing her palms against the smooth, cold beskar, an invitation and a question all at once. “Novalise,” he tries, and her name sounds like something more, something deeper, something holy. Quietly, she presses her body against his, letting the coolness of the armor heat up against the soft curves of her skin. “We can’t do this in here—”

“You’re the one,” she breathes, hooking her fingers under the rim of the helmet, “who said this is our place to desecrate.”

Din’s breath comes out sharp and wicked, like he’s been impaled on her words. “And I meant it then,” he manages, as she starts to pull his helmet off, “but now all I want to do is be back out there in the stars. Not be this figurehead. Not being the leader of a dozen people who all hate my guts and want to slaughter me for the throne.”

“You are a leader,” Nova continues, pressing her body closer to his. Even through the armor, she can feel him harden against her touch, stiffening against her trousers, a sign that she’s pushing the both of them closer and closer to the edge. “You’re an excellent leader. Tell me what to do.”

“Nova—”

“Prove it,” she whispers, her voice barely air. Her blood is pumping so heavily in her ears that her own words sound distorted, like they’re under a waterfall. “Show me you’re a good leader. Because I believe you are, but I know you have to prove it to believe it.”

“This isn’t what this place was made for.”

Nova stops, her forehead pressed against his. Everything in this strange arena is quiet except for their breathing, an urgent pulsing in the cold, dark night. “So fighting is sacred to Mandalorians,” she breathes, feeling the airlocks that keep Din’s helmet secure around his face hiss. He doesn’t move, letting her lift off his helmet, to have him without his armor. “You’re sacred to me. Every inch of you.”

The sound that erupts from Din’s mouth is even more wicked as the modulator cuts off in the middle of it. Nova pulls the rest of the helmet off of his face, her eyes roaming over every single pore, trying to memorize the way he’s staring at her, half-frenzied, his eyes fluttering somewhere between pleasure and pain.

“Novalise.” Her name still sounds like a prayer. Nova doesn’t break Din’s eye contact, just drops the helmet with a clatter against the floor. It’s loud, deafening almost, but he doesn’t flinch at the sound. “You can’t say things like that to me—”

“Then stop me,” Nova counters. Her heart is hammering. She’s being a brat, she knows she is, a whiny, wheedling baby that only wants one thing, but she can’t help herself. Din’s gloved hand closes around her wrist, squeezing lightly, and even though it makes her heart skip a beat, she’s unhinged and dangerous right now. Silently, she unhinges his hand from where it’s gripping her arm and places Din’s fingers against her throat, leaning into his touch, eyes wide, inviting. “I know you. I know what you want. I know that I made a Rebel out of you, Mand’alor, but I also know that when you give people orders, they’re helpless to do anything other than follow them. You can have whatever you want. You just have to prove it.”

His eyes glint for just a moment. It’s in a flash, over almost as soon as it starts, just a nanosecond, but something glittering and dangerous sparks up behind Din’s measured brown eyes, and Nova barely has time to inhale before his grips tightens around her throat, his other hand anchoring her hips in place. It’s an exact replica of the way he’s held her a million times, but his touch still feels brand new. “I want you.”

Everything stops existing. The war, the ghost town of a planet they’re supposed to rule, the First Order, the insidious war that’s gearing up in the underbelly of the galaxy. The pressure for Din to be a ruler, the urgency of Nova becoming a Jedi, every single piece of their lives fall away. It’s devastating and divine, vivid and vivacious. “Then take me,” Nova breathes, feeling Din harden against her leg, hot and heavy even through her pant leg and the beskar that’s protecting him. “Take me, but do it without armor.”

He stares at her, just for a second, and despite knowing that she has her husband wrapped around her pinky finger, Nova’s own eyes widen, heartbeat quickening, worried she took it a step too far. When Din’s hands disappear from her body, a panicked apology is already trying to hurtle its way out of her mouth, but Din doesn’t break eye contact. His hands pull the armor off of his body, letting each piece clatter at his feet like it’s nothing. Nova’s breath has barely been returned to her lungs by the time that Din’s finished undressing, standing in front of her with nothing but his underclothes, Mandalorian blue, and then he slams himself into her, knocking both of them back a few steps with the centrifugal force. Her knees buckle as she lets herself be swept away, wind knocked right back out through the hollow of her open mouth, Din’s hands purposeful and intentional.

Nova’s pretty sure she’s seen Din this vibrant before, this full of desire, but the way he devours her means something deeper. It’s desperate, and yearning, and haunting, leaving his mark all over her body to be worn as a prize later. His lips trail down her jaw, his teeth sinking into her skin, tongue licking out a symphony on the pulse points he’s expertly mapped over the last year. “Din,” she manages, before his name is sucked straight out of her mouth, and his hands twist and writhe underneath the clothes she’s wearing.

Almost as immediately as he started, his mouth disappears. Nova’s eyes flutter open, trying to find where Din retracted himself to, and his large hands, suddenly bare of the gloves he was wearing just a second ago, grasp onto her face. She inhales sharply as he grabs her, the force of his grip puckering her lips up. Nova feels like putty in his hands, like she’s buzzing. “You want me without armor, cyar’ika?” he asks. Din’s voice is so low, it rumbles straight through her, everything between her legs a hurricane. “You want me to be a ruler?”

Wordlessly Nova nods, trying to coax air back into her lungs. “Yes,” she manages.

There’s something torrential in the low blaze of Din’s eyes. Nova thinks she’s still standing, that he’s keeping her upright, but honestly, she can’t tell. The only thing she’s focused on is the darkened outline of his gorgeous face, the flash of his eyes. “Then I want you like that, too,” Din breathes, yanking the shawl right off of her shoulder. Nova’s hair springs out from underneath it, ricocheting against her face as Din grasps her cheeks, pulling her forehead against his. “No armor. Submissive to what I say.”

Nova gasps, nodding against Din’s touch, and when he tears her clothes off of her, she doesn’t even try to tell him she needs them intact. It’s just fabric. It doesn’t matter, not when his hands can burn against her. When they sink down to the floor of the amphitheatre, kissing so hard their teeth knock together, nothing else exists anymore. It’s just Nova and Din and the stars they’re under, just like always.

The ground is cold against her back, but the second Din pulls his pants down and gets on top of her, the chill is immediately forgotten. Nova stares up at Din, trying to map every single inch of his face, even though she’s already memorized it, even though he’s shown it to the rest of the planet, it still feels so incredibly divine. He’s inhaling sharply, and when she flutters his eyelashes up at him, she nods. Permission. It’s just a second, wordless, but he understands. Usually, Nova wants foreplay, to be kissed, to have every single inch of her body blessed by the man she loves, but that’s not necessary tonight. When he pushes inside of her, hard and warm and huge, she gasps against the pressure. It’s devastating. It’s perfect. It’s hot and heavy and loud, and the force of how Din’s fucking her makes her head slam back agaisnt the floor. Before she can mutter a single word, one of his hands comes up underneath her skull, creating a barrier against Nova and the marble. She lifts her hips, locking her ankles around Din, trying to keep herself in the place he needs her, eyes rolling back in her head.

Somewhere, something devious whispers to her that she’s being used, but right now, Nova doesn’t even care. Every inch of her body is screaming out for Din’s, and every place where he’s touching her feels sacred, complete.

“Nova,” he whispers, and she’s a hymn, a prayer, something deeper than herself in this strange, makeshift place of worship. She wants to talk, to reassure him that she’s here, but then Din’s mouth is back against her lips, ravenous, unyielding. It’s everything. It’s dark in here, and still eerily quiet, and for the first time, she’s unabashed about filling this space up with their noise. It feels like a rite of passage, something divine, especially when Din licks his vows into her mouth, murmuring in Mando’a, swearing in Basic, and his other hand finds the curve of Nova’s hips, lifting her up so he can fuck deeper into her. Suddenly, every single insidious thought evaporates, her hand fluttering down across her stomach to reach her clit.

“Din,” she manages, breathy and disconnected, and immediately, his expert hand knocks hers away, replacing her touch with vigor. Before Nova even has a chance to adjust to his pressure, he’s pushing her over the edge, her oragasm quick and loud, deafening and ecstatic.

“Wait for me,” he grunts, his mouth back on her neck, and Nova’s eyes are flooding with collapsing stars, her ears buzzing, and she wants to apologize that she’s beating him there but when he’s touching her like that, she doesn’t even care. But then Din breaks away from her, angling his hips to slam deeper and deeper into Nova, and his lips tear off her neck, knocking their foreheads together. “Now,” he orders, and his voice is low and commanding, and that alone sends Nova through the roof.

Din grunts as he’s about to cum, writhes into her like it’s the last time that he’ll ever get to touch her. Usually, he pulls out soon afterward, rolls over on his back beside her, but tonight, he just grabs onto Nova’s jaw and stays pulsing in her. Every time his cock twitches with the aftershock, it extends Nova’s own orgasm, and she lets herself be held there, not wanting to move.

“I could,” she starts, panting.

“Stay here forever,” Din finishes, his voice barely anything at all. “I know.”

For what feels like lightyears, they stay together, a tangle of limbs and warmth, trying to catch their collective breaths. Slowly, the rest of the world filters back in, and the quiet, starry darkness of the amphitheatre doesn’t feel desecrated. It feels used, for something better than it was designed for, at that, and Nova feels her heartbeat pound down to a regular rhythm before she lets Din lay down beside her, both of them exhausted, staring up at the ceiling.

“I meant it,” Nova finally says, closing her eyes to feel the hum of her own voice in her throat. One hand is tracing the outline of her scar, the other is tangled up in the discarded shawl that Din thankfully did not eviscerate. “When I said you were a good leader. I think you’re a great one, Din Djarin, and even though I want to be out there.” Nova trails off, gesturing at the ceiling painted with stars, “if staying put means you get to do that, I’ll stay right here. I’ll be a Mandalorian.”

Din’s quiet. Nova doesn’t dare to move, because she knows the significance of what she just said, the crushing weight of it. “I meant it, too,” he whispers, finally. “When I said I’d follow you anywhere.”

Nova inhales sharply, finally turning her head to search her husband’s eyes. “I know,” she murmurs, eyebrows furrowing down the middle. “And I believe you. But what do you want?”

Din’s face is entirely unreadable. Nova counts the beats of her heart as they sit there in the silence, trying to encourage him without saying a single thing.

“You.”

Nova inhales, wetting her mouth with her tongue. “What else do you want?”

Din stares at her, moving only to press the open palm of his bare hand against her cheek. “I want you without armor, too,” he whispers, and then pulls both of them to their feet. Nova knows there’s more to that sentence, but she’s fighting sleep, and she doesn’t want to put pressure on more points than either of them can take. Wordlessly, they redress, and Nova follows Din out of the eerie amphitheatre, out of the maze of tunnels, back to the first floor where the giant war room sits, beskar throne impenetrable at the highest point. She wraps her shawl tighter around ehr shoulders, all the warmth that sex gave them blown away by the startling reality of the situation. Without a word, Din presses the ignition to the holotable, and the strange, blue, fractured image of Nova ten years ago illuminates.

She inhales sharply, her old reflection a sucker punch. Din grabs her hand, and Nova squeezes it, trying to stare at herself head on, without flinching.

“I want to kill off Andromeda Maluev and everyone who’s after her,” Din breathes, his voice so much louder without the barrier of the helmet and the modulator. “I don’t want to rule this planet and ignore the war that’s coming while there are people out there who want you.”

“Din—”

“Listen to me,” Din whispers, grabbing Nova’s face in his hands, and she turns away from her painful reflection, letting him become the only thing she orbits, even if it’s only for a second, even if it’s only for now. “You are Novalise Djarin. I’m not going to let anyone take that away from you.”

Nova’s green eyes flood with tears. Above them, above the mist and fog and haze that hangs over Mandalore like an omen, her stars are sparkling and clear. She inhales, focusing her blurry gaze on her husband, something concrete, something real. “What does that mean?” she whispers, and Din’s right hand goes to her right hip, purposefully knocking into the Skywalker family lightsaber, and Nova’s sharp inhale comes out stuttered.

Din’s eyes are a promise, a prayer. His bare hand smoothes back over her cheek, and something dangerous and pulsing inside of Nova suddenly quiets. “It means,” he says, guiding her own hand down to the weapon hanging from her hip, “that we do what Mandalorians do best. We’ll take it one day at a time,” he continues, and Nova nods, “but we’re going do what we do best. All of us.”

“What are you—?”

“I’m saying,” Din sighs, pointing up through the domed ceiling, and Nova strains her eyes to look through the clouds to the stars above, pulsing and flickering with the promises they’ve made to each other, “that Bo-Katan is going to protect Mandalore, Luke is going to train our kid, Boba and Fennec are going to avenge, Cara’s going to forcefully keep the peace, Karga’s going to figure out who put the bounty on your head, Wedge is going to rally the troops, and you and I are going to save the galaxy.”

There’s a smile on Nova’s face before can register everything Din’s saying. “Din—”

“You’re the only one who gets me without armor,” Din whispers into her ear, and Nova feels the giant door sliding open behind them. She’s going to turn around to yell at Bo-Katan that it’s not the morning yet, and that she just wants one tiny minute of happiness before returning to the weight pressing down on all of their shoulders, but multiple voices filter into the throne room, and Nova lets Din pull her up the steps onto the dais, watching as the space fills up with the people who still make up Mandalore. Bo-Katan raises her chin at them, but something’s replaced the fear and vitriol in her eyes. Din lets his helmet clatter on the floor, the noise loud enough for the rest of the hushed noise in the room to fall quiet. Nova swallows, staring out to the scene of people gathered in front of them, trying to look like a leader, like someone trustworthy. “We’re going to fight,” Din promises, his voice full and honest, a vow, and then he turns to face the people he rules in the center of the room. “Let’s get started.”

*

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*

I HOPE YOU LOVED IT!!! writing this story is truly my biggest joy, and getting to share it with all of you is priceless! i lovelovelove talking to you about your theories and comments and questions, so please leave them below or send me them on tumblr (amiedala)! i think i am finally back on track, so CHAPTER FOUR WILL BE UP SATURDAY, OCTOBER 2ND, AT 7:30 PM EST!!!

i love you all, have a lovely week (hopefully with fall weather coming your way)!!! <3

xoxo, amelie

[gretchensinister]

I’m Your Boogeyman

A tense summer. A hot night. The need for touch, and the need to stop worrying about what’s normal.

A man in his late twenties is living in an apartment with a boogeyman, but naturally he doesn’t know that. The boogeyman is wildly obsessed with him, though, and one night when Zander lets his leg hang over the side of the bed, they finally meet. And a lot more besides. Classic meet-cute, right? 13,314 words. A whole lemon.

*** 

Zander had always run hot. That was the problem, and there was really nothing to be done about it. Oh, sure, there were mundane ways of addressing the issue—sleeping in just his shorts, getting a fan, making a dry cold-pack with rice and a couple of old t-shirts. He told himself if he ever got rich he’d set the air conditioning to whatever he honestly needed it to be at night and to hell with everyone else.

But right now he wasn’t rich. He lived in an apartment that was the west side of the second floor of a massive, venerable Victorian, and while there were many lovely details about it that had survived the renovations that made it into four homes instead of one, the large windows in his bedroom did not seem quite so lovely when they gathered every bit of the sun’s heat on long summer evenings. Even insulated blackout curtains didn’t do much to help his bedroom stay cool, which both baffled and frustrated him. The reason he’d had such curtains in the first place was because he’d lived in Texas for a few years before moving much farther north. They’d been effective there! But then again, a lot of buildings in Texas, even old, shitty ones, were built so that the people in them could easily shave a few degrees off the interior temperatures. If you didn’t do that, you just died.

Zander would concede that the place he lived now regularly experienced long periods where if your house didn’t retain as much heat as possible, that would be the situation where you just died.

Still, when he tried to sleep during the summer in his current apartment, he very much resented that the original architect had been so good at their job. If he had just needed to be a little cooler to sleep well, maybe running hot wouldn’t have been so much of a problem. Fans did work wonders when much of his body was bare, and the rice bag in the freezer was extraordinarily soothing when laid across his wrist where his all-too-warm blood rushed by so near to his skin. But his needs were not just about temperature. Zander needed to be cool to be comfortable as he slept, but to feel safe enough to sleep in the first place, he needed to be covered.

He wished he could let go of this feeling, he really did. He’d even tried to slowly ease himself out of the habit: falling asleep with one arm outside the sheet, then both arms, then his chest, but habits and instincts were harder to break than that. Whenever he woke up, usually from being too hot, he would be completely wrapped, even tangled, in the sheet.

The thing was, he suspected he might have been able to succeed in learning how to sleep without covers if it hadn’t been for…something…about his bedroom. Nothing had happened in it to make him feel unsafe. (Nothing much had happened in it at all, to his great disappointment, if he was being honest.) But there was something undefinable about it. After the sun went down, it always seemed a little darker than it should have been, no matter what kind of lightbulbs Zander put in the lamps. Sometimes, as he was getting into bed, the quiet of the room seemed expectant. Which was a bananas thing to think or say to anyone, so he didn’t.

He had asked his landlady about the history of the house. She’d only shrugged. “A few people have died here, I guess. Nothing crazy like a murder. But people mostly died at home back in the day.” When he’d asked her, she’d been out in the backyard, chain-smoking. “If you can get or fake some halfway decent ghost evidence, I’ll knock fifty bucks off your rent. Love to know there’s an afterlife with a habit like mine. But if you find a way to quit that sticks, I’ll knock a hundred bucks off everybody’s rent.”

It had been an unhelpful conversation, to say the least. He couldn’t stop thinking about paying for her cigarettes for weeks.

Anyway, he didn’t really believe that his room was haunted, nor that a standard bedsheet would prove a barrier to any sort of ghost. Whatever was off about the space probably had to do with old walls falling slightly out of true, and wiring that was somehow incompatible with modern technology (it was not his area of expertise). Or maybe he subconsciously hated being alone so much that he couldn’t get totally comfortable in the room he was alone in.

I wouldn’t have been such a big deal, except for the heat that made his compulsion almost unbearable.

And what good could it possibly do? What protection did a bedsheet possibly offer if there really was something malevolent about? (Which there wasn’t. Couldn’t be.)

***

It was a creature of instinct more than intellect. This was mainly due to the fact that it didn’t exist continuously. While it was intelligent, it was difficult to understand the world and form opinions about anything in it when it didn’t have a solid form most of the time.

It vastly preferred existence to non-existence, though, and the hours it was most coherent all took place in the presence of its otherbeing. It was aware that there were many otherbeings, even sensed that it existed because of otherbeings, but distinct memories were a luxury of form. It hadn’t had a form for a long time before this otherbeing moved into its territory, so it didn’t have many clear memories. When coherence was brief, only the broadest strokes of physicality returned—limbs, teeth, eyes. Only the memories, only the thoughts, necessary for survival. But when coherence lasted longer, as a more stable state—as it did when its otherbeing was close by—that was when it gained details: skin texture, claws, memory, continuity.

Its otherbeing was often close by, and the creature had become, to put it simply, obsessed. It knew every different way the otherbeing’s breath sounded, it knew every subtle variation of the otherbeing’s heartbeat, it knew the way the otherbeing smelled just before washing and just after, it knew every scent that was just the otherbeing, separate from anything the otherbeing brought in from the world outside. It knew the sound of the otherbeing’s voice, and could pick it out from any of the cacophony of sounds the otherbeing was often surrounded by, even though, for a very long time, the otherbeing rarely spoke at all. It knew the way the otherbeing moved, all the fantastic shapes the otherbeing was made of, the colors of the otherbeing’s skin and hair in moonlight and starlight and streetlamp light and indoor lamp light (even if it was uncomfortable to observe anything in such brightness).

All this knowing felt mostly normal to the creature, though the way it brought it so much joy did not seem typical—but then, there were no others like itself present to confirm its strangeness.

But maybe that was better! If it was a creature that was not supposed to feel this way about its otherbeing, it would rather not know. It did guess that some kind of line had been crossed, because it had spent enough attention to know that this otherbeing was a he-otherbeing named Zander. Sometimes the creature would whisper the name to itself, when it and Zander were in the places that felt most right: Zander sleeping in his bed, the creature curled on the floor beneath it.

Sometimes, the nights like that were so lovely and peaceful that all the creature’s instincts faded away, and it even fell asleep during the precious hours of darkness.

But the real line that it had crossed had been more recent, only several months ago (how sophisticated it felt for thinking of months rather than moon-cycles! So proud in its knowledge of Zander’s world!). It had still been winter, then—a wonderful season for the creature, when the nights were longer and Zander was more often indoors. But inevitably, the nights grew shorter, and the creature felt terribly, terribly cheated. Not of coherence. In a strict sense, it could survive with very little of that. But of its time with Zander. And in defiance of all its scant knowledge of itself, of the rules of its existence, it held itself together through the slow flare of sunrise, huddling in the greying dark under Zander’s bed, saying his name over and over again. It hurt to do this, and that was a warning, wasn’t it, that the creature was endangering itself? But Zander was still sleeping so peacefully, with such good deep breaths, such a steady heartbeat. How could it be expected to fade in the middle of that?

And in a thoughtless and sublime expression of desire, it had clawed its way up the side of the bed in the searing sunrise. Indirect, weak winter sunlight fell from the large windows upon Zander’s face, and the creature had thought it looked like the ultimate contradiction: the sun, but safe and beautiful.

What an irrevocable instant! Its being flooding with unfamiliar emotions, its physical body burning with pain it could never have imagined—it would have howled if the sun had not forced its dissolution in the very next moment.

That night, when it formed again, the memory of Zander’s sunlit face had returned immediately, sharper than any teeth it could form after such a harrowing morning. And it curled its vague form into a tight ball and held its head and shook.

Before, it had known that it lived and cohered because of Zander—the fine aether of his unease, the miasma of his nightmares: these were ultimately its daily bread. But now it also knew that it lived for Zander.

It had no idea how to face a craving that could draw it into the sun.

For a time, all it could do was continue as before, though its scrutiny became bolder and more reckless—enough to glut it on its actual sustenance, but doing nothing to appease its other pangs.

It took to exploring Zander’s bedroom as soon as it got dark, storing up memories, storing up knowledge.

It would stand in the shower behind the curtain, smelling the shampoo, the soap. What would it be like to use the shower, as if it was a being like Zander?

It would watch Zander watching movies on his computer in the living room, standing just inside the doorway of the bedroom. It would have the courage to approach and watch him from behind the couch soon enough—and that was but another sign of its derangement. The risk of being seen would be so great, and being seen was dangerous. It would…it would produce too much fear to process, and risked driving Zander away.

The problem with that was that it couldn’t know when another otherbeing would move in, and it could be consigning itself to nonexistence for a very long time. But the bigger problem was that it didn’t want to lose Zander, and if it did…it found it didn’t really care if any otherbeings ever moved into its territory or not.

The sun continued to gnaw away at the night, but not many days before it consumed over half the day, something wonderful happened. Zander started staying home much, much more. He started using his computer to talk to other otherbeings much more, giving the creature more of his voice to listen to and remember. His dreams and nightmares grew more powerful than ever, and the creature thought that if it had been normal for its kind, it would have been the most content of them all: strong, well-nourished, with peculiar otherbeing things to observe all the time.

Unfortunately, despite gaining much happiness from this new routine, it started to dwell on what it could not have of Zander.

It could not touch. It could not taste. There were rules to its existence that were truly impossible for it to break. Bearing the touch of the sun was excruciating, but there might be reasons for a creature like it to do so—moving from hiding place to hiding place, perhaps. But other choices didn’t result in an action and some accompanying pain. They resulted in nothing at all, as if the creature had not even thought of moving.

For example: the otherbeing was never to be touched with the creature’s mouth. The creature understood this. It didn’t feed with its mouth, and didn’t have a digestive system like that of a continuously corporeal creature. Bites and mouth-touches might produce sustaining terror, but as in the case of being seen, this terror might be enough to overwhelm a creature, or it might be enough to drive a creature’s otherbeing away. Mouth details, like fangs, were for…well, this particular creature had no idea what they could be for, when it tried to think about it logically. Just another instinct. (Though this one could be overcome, at least partially. For a while now, when the creature re-formed at dark, it had been experimenting with how small it could make its fangs. It had managed to make them small enough to easily speak like Zander did, which was interesting, and exciting, even, until the creature remembered that it would never have the need to speak this way.)

But the strongest instinct of all, and the strongest prohibition, was this: no matter how perfect the opportunity, no matter how dark the night, no matter how deeply the otherbeing was asleep, the creature could not touch any part of the otherbeing unless two conditions were met. The first condition: only parts of the otherbeing that weren’t covered by bed-fabric could be touched. The second condition: only parts of the otherbeing that extended over the edge of the bed could be touched.

The creature had lost count of the times it had stood at the side of Zander’s bed and tried to make itself reach out—to touch his face, to finally learn the texture of his skin and hair! But it could never move. It didn’t matter if its muscles were newly formed or if they were hours old, if it tried to concentrate on the action or move without thinking about it. Nothing. More than anything else, this prohibition seemed inherent to its very being. It was the kind of creature it was because of this.

Did any others of its kind feel that this was cruelty? That their existence as substantial beings depended on bonding with one particular otherbeing, and yet it was all too simple for this otherbeing to remain forever untouchable?

Then again, perhaps it was not such a problem for others. Perhaps Zander was an exceptionally careful otherbeing.

***

It was August, and Zander was pretty sure he was losing it. He understood that this was not a particularly unique feeling, but it still wasn’t good. His vague weird feeling about his bedroom had progressed into a full feeling of being watched, which occasionally hit him in the bathroom and the living room, as well. He would swear that sometimes his things had been moved, just slightly, as if someone had been picking them up and putting them down for some reason. None of the lights seemed to be as bright as they should be.

He toyed with several explanations, and tested each of them. Could there be another person secretly living in his apartment? A thorough search produced nothing. Could he be experiencing carbon monoxide poisoning? The two detectors he ordered online showed the same very low reading. Could he be developing a diagnosable mental illness, not just “losing it”? He was a few years past the average onset age of schizophrenia for men, but times were weird. This one wasn’t as easy to rule out, but he didn’t have any family with the illness, and as far as he could tell, he didn’t have any symptoms during the daytime. At least, no symptoms that were notable, considering the isolation. He decided he couldn’t dwell on this and if he saw or heard anything really off, he’d follow some advice he’d found and try recording it on his phone.

His phone had acquired a few new apps during the whole investigation. An infrasound detector told him that he was not being affected by infrasound. A sleep monitoring app remained unused.

It remained unused because even if he knew he wasn’t being haunted, because ghosts didn’t exist, it still seemed…foolish, somehow, to pay extra attention to whatever might be happening while he was asleep. He was waking up every morning, after all. But then again, how was he supposed to find answers if there were means of investigation that he was deliberately ignoring?

Return to the first premise: he was simply losing it.

He entertained the possibility that he was losing it and there was something strange in the neighborhood, so to speak, but this only led to more questions about how he was supposed to respond. He certainly wasn’t going to pay for a psychic cleansing over Zoom. Not with what only amounted to weird feelings, anyway.

But probably there was nothing weird going on, not in a supernatural sense, anyway! He was just losing it because the only people he could justify seeing face to face were his coworkers, and screw them, if he couldn’t be around his friends he certainly wasn’t going to voluntarily be around not-friends for eight hours a day; he was losing it because even if he could be around his friends what he wanted was to be held and sure everyone was queer and cool but he’d never been able to ask before all this so why did he think he was going to be able to ask afterwards, when he would doubtless be even weirder than five months (and counting) had made him?

And he was losing it because in order to keep whatever it was, he needed to sleep, and that was so often the most difficult thing about his day, because of the heat!

So he lay awake in his astounding solar oven of a bedroom, staring up at the ceiling with the sheet pulled up to his neck, while his fan failed to act on his sweat and his little animal thoughts chased their tails in his mind.

I need to be cool. I need to be covered. I need to be held. I need to be cool. I need to be covered. I need to be held.

Somehow, he always drifted off eventually.

And one night, he drifted off with the sheets less firmly anchored under the mattress than they usually were. As he floated off into sleep, the higher order of his thoughts that insisted on the necessity of covering quieted well before his body’s insistence on reaching a comfortable temperature. He shifted and turned, gradually freeing himself from the sheet, slipping ever deeper into dreams. With the sheet discarded, his body discovered one more helpful adjustment: with his leg hanging off the mattress, the airflow around it helped his body release heat very well.

***

A pounding heart, a dry mouth, even overwhelmed tears—these are all things that belong to continuous bodies. But the creature could tremble, and it did, even as it reached out, hardly able to believe its good luck, hardly able to believe this incredible blessing that had finally been bestowed on it.

***

It was from an instantly forgotten dream and to the unfamiliar, unexpected, and uncanny sensation of a light, cool grip on his ankle that Zander awoke. Fuck, I knew it! was his first thought, followed by a nervous, panicky negation. This couldn’t be happening. This was the remnant of a dream. In a few seconds he’d realize he’d misinterpreted the sensation.

Moments passed, huge moments where the grip on his ankle didn’t change at all, and Zander soon felt like he’d never been so awake in his life. And then the…hand? It did feel like a hand, with fingers on one side and a thumb on the other—had he missed someone living in his house somehow? The hand began to slowly move up his calf. Carefully. Gently. It was…it was honestly a caress, and Zander had no idea if that made it better or worse, more or less likely to be a hallucination. But the fingers and thumb were long enough that even at the midpoint of his calf, they almost wrapped around his leg entirely, and that meant that this hand was definitely not human.

This was bad, probably, but it was also something that he was sure no one expected him to just put up with and carry on through, and that felt like a relief. His mind cleared. First thing: determine if this was a hallucination. He lifted his phone from the windowsill, thumbed open the camera, and aimed it at his knee, where one…claw? Oh God. One claw was carefully poking at the scar from a childhood bike accident. The screen showed nothing he could see at this angle, as the only light in the room came from the phone itself or the line between the curtains where the streetlights shone faintly in. He tapped the screen.

The auto-flash worked just as it was supposed to. It also completely disoriented Zander, but not before he caught a glimpse of a gaunt humanoid figure with a mouth far too large and full of fangs crouched by the side of his bed. One or both of them gave a horrible yelp, and Zander was mentally confronting the possibility of being eviscerated when he realized the creature’s hand was still wrapped around his knee, unmoving.

***

Awful, awful, the sudden light! Zander must have seen it, but it was an accident, it was not breaking its rules. There was no light-pain anymore, in fact the light-pain had probably been a good thing, as healing used up much of the energy it was getting from Zander’s fear right now. And so it did not let go. This might be its only chance to touch Zander, and it was not yet satisfied, only ever more curious from its touches so far. His leg was so much softer than the bottom of his foot, and covered with hair, too. It was fascinating, and it suspected that this was far from the only fascinating thing about Zander’s body.

But it was so unlikely now that Zander would indulge it by leaving the bed. Or! If he did leave the bed he would leave forever, and there’d be no point in having a form ever again because there wouldn’t be Zander to watch and listen to and touch.

Unconsciously, the creature gripped Zander’s knee more tightly. Was there anything it could do? Was tonight to be the culmination of all its hopes, and the threshold of an existence of nothing but void? Had it been worth it to face the sun, when it would all end like this?

But! Oh! This was the power of memory. It had faced the sun. The things it felt were different. It was different. It could do things that were unaccounted for in the rules of its existence.

***

The image on the phone screen showed a dark gray entity with a huge mouth full of fangs, a collection of slits for a nose, two very large round eyes, and pointed, animal-like ears on the sides of its head that were probably bigger than Zander’s hand. It had a long skinny neck and long skinny arms connected to a torso that was, probably, also long and skinny. It didn’t have any hair. It looked very solid, blocking the view of his desk in the picture like any real thing in that location would. It also kind of looked…surprised?

You and me both! Zander thought. He found he had no idea what to do now that he had evidence that there was really something in his room. Something that was still holding onto his leg. Something that was, in fact, an actual fucking monster!

No, no, no, part of his brain chanted, a desperate negation, a call for the world to be as it had been. It’s not a monster, there’s no such thing as monsters, people see things and misidentify them all the time, it’s usually something like a starving bear with mange, that’s what this must be, a starving bear with mange, something that at least EXISTS—

Zander stifled a wild laugh. This wasn’t a bear of any kind, for one thing, and for another, how would it possibly be better if a starving bear with mange was in his apartment and holding onto his leg? That would be an almost certainly fatal situation. A monster, though? Well, who the hell knew?

“Zander. Please don’t leave.”

He dropped his phone. That had to be—that had to be the monster talking to him. And it knew his name, knew how to speak English, and knew how to be polite. And it was asking him to stay? Okay. Okay. Sure. This gave him something to work with.

“Why do you want me to stay?” he croaked out. “Are you going to kill me?”

“NO! No, no, no! I only want to touch you! I’ve waited for so long, and this was my first chance!”

“Wh—what do you mean, so long? How long?”

A short pause. “Since you became my otherbeing. My…human. Since you first dreamed in my territory.”

Zander’s mind raced. Did it mean since he’d moved into the apartment? That was almost four years ago! “Why…was this your first chance?”

“Because of the rules,” the monster said. “You have to be asleep. You have to be uncovered. You have to be off the mattress.”

Just as he’d always suspected. The part of his mind that had suggested the mangy starving bear tried to tell him this situation was weird and incomprehensible and was sending him slipping and spinning into totally unknown territory. But the thing was, if he accepted the scenario totally and completely as something that was happening, it was easy to understand. “Do you live under my bed?”

“Yes, or at least I did. As I got more and more curious about you I moved around more. I learned many things. And now that you’re around more, I have more energy to keep my form. I can remember more things.”

“You don’t always have a body? Where does your energy come from?”

“My energy comes from your nightmares and your waking fears, though there is a danger of waking fear being overwhelming. I am not sure how I withstood your reaction to seeing me. There is a correct level of energy for taking a form at night. It takes much more energy to maintain a form against light. It is…by instinct it is impossible to keep a form in sunlight. It is very painful. But I did it once.”

Zander stared up at the ceiling, which he could now make out the edges of thanks to the faint light from the streetlamps. He might be feeling like he was starting to understand this situation, but looking at the monster again—yeah, that would really loosen his grip on things. “So you…feed off my fear, but only a little at a time. You can only exist in the dark. You live under my bed. You can’t touch any part of my body that’s on the mattress and covered. You honestly sound like a childhood boogeyman, except that I’m not a child.”

“It is hard to remember, but I believe I came to exist because of a child. When a child dreamed in this room. I think there may have been other children, also. Others of my kind. But formlessness erases memory, and I was formless for what I think was many years. But then you came. And now I’m no child’s boogeyman. I’m your boogeyman. Only, only yours.”

Zander took a slow breath. Two things were occurring to him.

One: this boogeyman had kind of a nice voice, low and a little scratchy. It sounded like it had a bit of an accent, too, but that was no doubt because of the fangs and maybe—maybe never speaking to anyone else before? That seemed unbearably sad, but maybe it was normal for its…species? Kind?

Two: Maybe he didn’t have as good a grip on this situation as he had hoped.

“Do you have a name?” Zander asked. “And, um, I’m a he, other humans are she, or they, or…well, there are a lot of options. What about you?”

“No name,” the boogeyman answered immediately. “And I…I am an it.” It sounded puzzled with this last statement. And why not? thought Zander. Surely if I admitted to secretly living in someone’s house for four years, I wouldn’t expect them to ask my pronouns! There’d be other, more relevant, questions!

“Do you want a name?” This wasn’t one of those more relevant questions. But it was the only one that came to mind at the moment.

“Zander…you would give me a name?” The pure wonder in its voice. Had anyone ever said Zander’s name like that?

“Only if you want a name.” What was he doing? Why was he doing it?

“Yes!” It sounded a little different, now. As if it was shaking? “Zander, name me!”

“I—” He finally let out a little laughter. “I want to give you a good name, but I can’t hardly think now. Could I just—could I just nickname you ‘Boo’ right now, and come up with something better, later?”

“Boo,” the boogeyman said. “I am Boo!” It really sounded delighted, and Zander wondered if anything would have bothered it. Maybe not, as long as he had good intentions.

When the boogeyman—Boo—spoke again, it was quieter, more subdued. “I do not think that having a name is a usual part of being what I am. What you call a boogeyman.”

“Is that…a problem?”

“I don’t know. I like it, though. Anyway, it is not the first strange thing I have done since becoming your boogeyman.”

The mangy bear part of Zander’s mind posited that everything the monster had ever done was strange, because it was too strange to exist in the first place. Zander told that part of himself to pipe down. It was past time to accept that Boo was real, and as a being of a certain type, some things would be strange for it and others would be normal. Boo had even mentioned one, earlier. “Yeah. You said you braved the sun, once. Why did you do that?”

The hand around Zander’s knee twitched nervously. Oh. Yeah. Best not to forget about that. The claws, very close. (And also, Boo’s one stated desire so far: to touch him.)

“I was…curious,” Boo said. “No. That is not the right word. I wanted to know more of you than I already did. It shouldn’t matter to a boogeyman, but I liked watching you, whether you were uneasy or not. I liked knowing how you looked in different amounts of moonlight, in different colors of lamplight. You’re my favorite thing to look at. But I can only do that at night, when we both have forms. Last winter when I noticed that the nights were getting shorter I felt like you were being taken away. I wanted every sight of you I could hang onto. I hadn’t ever seen you in sunlight. An ordinary boogeyman wouldn’t have thought of it. But I did. I wanted to see your face in another kind of light, and sunlight was the only kind of light left. And I managed to endure it, and now I know what your face looks like in the sunlight.”

“Was it…was it worth it?”

“Yes.”

Zander’s first impulse was to push the story away, to tell Boo that maybe it needed to see more faces if it thought Zander’s was worth pain, but he held his tongue. Because there was something about what Boo had done that seemed understandable, familiar. To see someone and then begin to desire and to act in previously unthinkable ways—to irrevocably abandon normal—to risk pain for the sake of joy that it seemed so few others would understand—oh, he’d done it. If Boo’s experience was at all related…he didn’t want to make it seem small.

“You’re being strange for a boogeyman right now, too, aren’t you?”

“I was never supposed to talk to you,” Boo said. “I didn’t understand human language so much before I started paying attention to you. I couldn’t speak it. In the form I have by instinct, my fangs are too big to make all the sounds correctly.”

Are you FUCKING kidding me those are your SMALL fangs? Zander’s fear returned in a rush, and he heard Boo shift by the side of his bed. He forced himself to take deep breaths and did his best to push his fear to curiosity. What did it feel like to Boo, to be feared all of a sudden like that? Would it be like sipping water through a straw and then having someone pry your jaw open to dump a gallon down your throat? But maybe there was no metaphor, because the physical was always a limit for a human, and that didn’t seem to be the case for Boo. Unless Zander was totally wrong and it did need large fangs to chew up nightmares.

“You okay, Boo? Guess I wasn’t as calm as I thought.”

“I am okay. I will have to expend this energy soon, but that will not be dangerous to you. If I don’t find a way to use it myself, the excess will manifest as darkness. The lights in your apartment might not work for a few hours. It is enough energy to seek a new territory if a human leaves the original territory after seeing one of my kind. I did not understand this before, because leaving my territory had never occurred to me before you saw me. Another instinct. But you should also know that my fangs are only for the frightening appearance. No bites or mouth-touches are allowed. I have no digestive system. Any bites would be pointless.”

“Mouth-touches,” Zander repeated. It was an odd phrase for someone who otherwise used English so well. It sounded like a little word-veil, drawn between them so that they could both ignore what mouth-touches not part of eating would be. Or maybe that was a completely bonkers interpretation. Boo wasn’t human. Who could say how it would use language?

The obvious thing to do was ask for clarification. Zander closed his eyes for a few moments. He was going to have to come at this from an angle, and he wasn’t sure he was up to it. If he was wrong, he would create an awkward roommate situation that couldn’t be equaled, and if he was right…well, what did he plan to do?

“Anyway…you’re not supposed to be talking to me, but you can. I get that, it’s a new thing. Your instincts don’t have anything to tell you about it. But what about the way you’re still touching me? Is that also strange or…what am I not getting?” He felt a faint twitch from Boo’s hand once he fell silent.

“I can touch you because touch could make you more afraid,” Boo said. It sounded like it was trying to pick its words very carefully. “But…yes. This is also strange. And I am surprised that no instincts have made me let go. I think…it is better for a boogeyman if its human is not sure if it is really there. So touch should be fleeting. It is not…a need. But maybe that doesn’t matter. You must be very certain I’m here.”

“Yes,” Zander said. Oh, he had to be careful, now, very careful. Just because Boo would undergo the worst of boogeyman agonies just to see his face in the sunlight didn’t make his half-formed idea good. But then again, even if what he was thinking was a bad idea, at least it was fully his own bad idea. And he’d been buffeted around enough by other people’s bad ideas lately. So…let it all come together. Survival and need and want and…touch. “But maybe…maybe your instincts don’t have anything to say to you now because you don’t have any needs right now—is that true? I mean…from what you’ve told me. You have my fear, and that gives you energy to hold your form and do whatever else, and you’ve got the dark.”

“That is all a boogeyman needs.” Boo sounded troubled. “Zander…it does not feel like these are my only needs. Not when you are here.”

Zander swallowed. “Well, it sounds like you have some really strong wants, then. I think that’s…that’s part of being alive. Wanting more than the bare minimum of what’s needed to survive. I mean, that’s one of the first things you said to me.”

“That I wanted to touch you. Yes.”

Boo drew out this last word into a hiss, and shiver ran down Zander’s spine. Sure it was fear, Boo was a creature formed to scare—but that wasn’t all of it.

“I still want to touch you,” Boo said. “Much more than I already have. Now that I know that I can while you are awake, while I am talking to you—I do not know if any other boogeyman has wanted a want like this. And I don’t care, because you are my otherbeing, my human, my Zander. Everything I have of you only makes me want more, and it doesn’t make any sense, and I don’t care, because even getting a little bit of what I want is wonderful. If you were all the way out of your bed, all the way uncovered, I—I don’t know if that would satisfy me. I don’t think it matters, I want that anyway.”

Zander’s heart beat faster—how could it not, when being talked to like this, even when he’d seen the terrifying form the pleasant voice belonged to? It was clear that Boo had no concerns about approaching this subject delicately. He took a deep breath, trying to clear the feeling of lightheadedness that had come upon him. It didn’t really help. This was weird! Very weird! But it really boiled down to this: Boo wanted to touch him. He wanted to be touched.

And he was starting to get curious, now, to see if Boo would like to be touched, and how.

“Boo, I think I want to have you touch me, too.”

“Zander! I…” In contrast to the declaration of its desire, Boo now sounded shy, even a little confused. “I want to make sure I touch you in a way that won’t make you leave. I don’t want to have to be anyone else’s boogeyman.”

“Yeah, we can talk about that, we can figure it out,” Zander said. “We’ve got all night, don’t we?”

“Yes!” Boo said, and again the word turned into a hiss.

This time Zander was able to find it more fascinating than frightening, though now he guessed that being frightening was the whole point. Whenever Boo didn’t think about what it was doing, it would probably end up doing something scary. It was probably the best way for a boogeyman to survive as a boogeyman, even if it was doing something unusual like talking—err on the side of scary. Zander smiled a little, just at the idea that something as strange and incredible as Boo should exist in the first place.

“What are you feeling?” Boo asked. “It’s because of me, but it’s not fear.”

“W—wonder, I think,” Zander stammered. So Boo could feel any emotion it caused, not just fear? That was bound to get interesting.

“Wonder. It feels good.”

Very interesting.

“Boo, before you get to touch—two things: Would it be safe for you if I opened the curtains a little more? To let in the streetlights? It’ll help me be less afraid if I can see what you’re doing, at least a little.”

“The streetlights won’t trouble me—but I don’t understand. It has become less frightening to see me?”

“Well, surprise adds a lot to fear,” Zander said. “If I can see your movements, I won’t be surprised when I feel your hands.”

“I see,” Boo said.

“And the other thing is—you did give me a good scare earlier. I have to go to the bathroom before we do anything else.”

“All right.” Boo made no move to let go of his leg.

“That means you have to let go of me for a couple minutes.”

“Oh. But I could come with. I’ve been in your bathroom lots of times. I like being behind the shower curtain.”

The thought so sometimes there actually WAS something there clashed with has Boo watched me pee?! and Zander pushed them both aside. It was time to focus on the now, and he didn’t want to fall down a rabbit hole of wondering what Boo might have seen him doing. Though, to be very, very honest, there was a sort of dirty little frisson to think that Boo could have seen him taking himself in hand—he really had lost it, hadn’t he?

“But you’re not coming with me now,” Zander said. “Hey. You know that bathroom doesn’t have any windows. I’m not going to run away.”

There was a pause, and then Boo gave a sigh. The hand at his knee slid back down his calf, over his ankle and foot, and then was gone.

“Please don’t grab my ankles when I step on the floor,” Zander said. “I’m guessing that might be—it might be another instinct.”

When Zander had taken a few steps away from his bed, Boo spoke again. “You were right. It was.”

Zander grinned, even as his ankles tingled with the apprehension of touch, and continued into the bathroom.

When he returned to his bedroom, he found that Boo had already opened the curtains. Zander had left the light off in the bathroom (after all, he knew the boogeyman wasn’t in there at the moment) to keep his night vision. Now, the orange glow from the streetlights outside was more than enough to reveal everything in his room. Including Boo.

At first, he couldn’t take another step forward. The sight of Boo pressed buttons older than wonder or sympathy or even curiosity, and he had to close his eyes before he could even pull himself together enough to speak. “Boo, can you say something? I’d gotten used to your voice, but, uh, seeing you was still a surprise.”

“I did use my time alone to use some of my extra energy to change my form,” Boo said. “I wanted…I wanted to try out hair.”

Zander sensed that this was not the whole truth, but he wasn’t going to get into that now. He took a deep breath. That was Boo’s voice. He’d talked to Boo. He’d—well, he’d really liked hearing that confession of desire from Boo. And yes. Boo was a monster. And when he opened his eyes, he was going to see Boo, and step closer to Boo, and check out Boo’s brand new form with hair. The seconds of preparation helped, and when Zander opened his eyes, fear gave one last jolt before swiftly receding in favor of wonder.

He walked forward slowly—his legs still felt a little weak from the first shock—never taking his eyes off Boo. To look at Boo properly barely seemed possible—to look away and back again? Absolutely not.

When he got within Boo’s reach, he paused and tried to take in as much detail as the streetlights allowed. Boo was the same color as before, that dark gray. Its skin was more matte than a human’s. The body that skin covered was very, very tall. At least seven feet, maybe a little more, it was hard to tell how close Boo’s head was to the ceiling in the low light. And still—Zander’s stomach lurched like it did when he looked out from the top of a roller coaster—from his earlier brief look, Boo had probably been even taller before. Whatever shapeshifting it had done had included changing its proportions so that it looked a little bit more compact, a little bit more human, now. But really, only a little.

Zander wondered if there was some mass Boo had to take on when it solidified, because in addition to being shorter than the first picture indicated, Boo now had a little more muscle and flesh on its body and limbs. Though it still made you wonder if it was hungry enough to make you its next meal. Too, the slight musculature it now had was…off…in some indefinable way. Zander had never made a study of human anatomy, but what Boo’s said to him was that it wasn’t an elongated human, but something else entirely. And there were other, far more obvious differences. Boo had only four toes on each foot, each of which ended in a sharp black claw. It had no navel, and the area between its legs appeared as smooth as a mannequin. And its hands, the hands Zander had invited it to touch him with…well, they had five fingers each, but he was almost sure each finger had an extra joint compared to a human finger. They definitely all had significant claws. But, perhaps…he wouldn’t know until Boo touched him again, but he thought maybe Boo had done its best to tone down the claws.

After all, Boo had done quite a bit on its fangs.

Boo’s face was what he had seen on his phone, and Boo’s face was where the changes it had made were clearest to Zander. Though its jaw remained somewhat prognathous, its fangs were now small enough that its lips closed over them easily. Its ears, too, were much smaller, even if they were still much larger than a human’s and still pointed. But they didn’t remind Zander so much of a bat anymore. But even with these changes, some things about Boo had stayed the same. Its nose remained as it had been, just a slight protrusion with two large nostril slits framed by two smaller, additional slits. Boo’s eyes were still enormous, and very round. They had no whites, but in the lamplight Zander thought he could see the distinction between iris and pupil. Incredible, that this faint light would cause such a contraction.

And, yes, finally, Boo had hair on the top of its head, now. It was black, several inches long, and quite messy. Of course, it has been formed rather hastily. It made Boo look—well, it was hard to say. Less alien. More uncanny.

Zander knew that most anything with hair or fur liked having it groomed. Would that be a built-in side effect of his boogeyman’s changed form? Who knew? No one, absolutely no one, and that was the most wondrous thing about this moment. They were both so far outside, and so hidden from any norms that either of them knew, that they were both looking at each other completely as themselves.

And this was where, and how, they were going to touch each other. It might be glorious. It might be terrible. It might simply be monstrous. But most of all, it would be theirs, and only theirs.

“Zander,” Boo said, and Zander saw its long, clawed hands flex, “now can I touch you?”

Zander realized that Boo must have been studying him with the same intensity as he had been studying Boo—perhaps even more, considering that Boo could see much better in the very dim light. And still this was its reaction: this desperation, this desire.

Seeing Boo’s whole form had not made Zander any less vulnerable to being desired. And, hey, some part of his mind that couldn’t let a numinous moment stand pointed out, you’ve always liked lanky guys.

He smiled, and Boo’s already-wide eyes went wider. “Boo, I was thinking. Your rules say you only get to touch me when I’m uncovered and hanging off the edge of the bed, but now that I know you’re here—now that we’ve got an understanding—well, is that still the case? What I’m saying, is…can I invite you onto my bed?”

Boo visibly shivered, but not, Zander thought, with revulsion. Anticipation, maybe.

“I have no idea,” Boo said. “I want to find out.”

Zander took a deep breath and another step forward. “Take my hand,” he said. “It might make it easier.”

Boo reached out, and Zander, focusing only on the wonder of it, found it easy to reach back and put his compact, soft hand into Boo’s spindly fingers. Its skin was smooth and dry—no natural oils like human skin, Zander guessed, since it didn’t really have that biology to maintain from day to day—and barely seemed warmer than the ambient temperature of the room. He must feel much different to Boo; would that be good, bad—?

“Your warmth,” Boo breathed. “It’s the first wonderful thing about touching you.”

Ah. Good, then.

“Well. Warmth I can guarantee,” Zander said. “It’s why I had my leg sticking out in the first place.” Keeping hold of Boo’s hand, he eased himself back into bed. “So far so good, huh? Nothing made you let go, even though I’m completely on the mattress.” He smiled up at Boo, and Boo blinked down at him, its lips twitching in a tentative answering smile. Sure, there was something unsettling about it, but also Zander guessed that most expressions might not come naturally to Boo. It probably learned them…from him. Astonishing. “Come on up, however you like, though you might end up getting another shot of fear if you—” He broke off, as Boo immediately took his invitation and climbed onto the bed.

And on top of Zander, which was what he’d expected, because it was the most frightening way to get close. Boo moved in a rather spidery way (of course) and when it stopped moving it had its hands planted on either side of Zander’s head, its knees to either side of Zander’s legs. The light from the streetlights no longer helped so much to see Boo’s face, though he could see a glint of eyes and oh, again, the fangs. Boo was grinning as it was poised above him.

“Comfortable?” Boo asked, and Zander immediately wanted to giggle. He held back, though, because despite all the absurdities in this situation, he didn’t want to risk Boo feeling laughed at in this moment—the first time it’d gotten into bed with someone it really, really wanted to touch.

“Yeah,” Zander answered softly. “You all right with that jolt I gave you just now? I couldn’t help it.”

“Yes.” Boo sounded thoughtful. “I am less worried about having too much energy now that I’m not trying to escape your notice. And you are still wondering at me more than anything else.”

“I suppose I am,” Zander said. He stretched out his arms and legs under Boo. Had he ever even been this vulnerable to another human being? Sure, he still had his boxer shorts on, but that was pretty insignificant compared to the fact that Boo knew him better than literally any other human being. Also, if Boo had been lying about itself and what it wanted—if those fangs and claws were about to be put to their more typical uses—he’d basically served himself up on a silver platter. Though that image did cause some sparks in some crossed wires in his brain.

He took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “All right, Boo,” he said. “You can touch me.”

Boo immediately lifted one spindly hand and cupped Zander’s cheek. It was a bizarrely human gesture, but it lasted only for a moment. Boo didn’t have any script to follow; all it knew was that it had been given permission to satisfy its desires, its curiosity. And still, Zander felt as though some kind of tightly wound spring inside him was easing with such a simple touch.

Boo’s fingertips poked gently at the softness of Zander’s cheek, and its claws were noticeable, but not in an uncomfortable way. Boo seemed to have the intent to treat Zander as carefully as it could, as it found his cheekbones and jaw and traced them, as it circled his ear and brushed across his forehead, as it investigated the shape of his nose and eyebrows.

And then Boo held the side of his face again, and slowly dragged its thumb over Zander’s lips.

“Boo?” Zander whispered, when it left its thumb at the corner of his mouth and hung over him, perfectly still, just looking.

“I think I’m changing, somehow,” Boo said. “Like when I become substantial. But I already am. I don’t understand.”

“Does that feel good or bad for you?”

“I think…good. But I’ve never felt anything like it before.” Boo shivered, a familiar motion made unfamiliar by the undercranked-film quality of it. Still a boogeyman. “Zander. I am going to touch you more, now.”

With only that much of a warning, Boo bent down and pressed its face against the side of Zander’s neck. Zander’s heart raced, some part of him still convinced that Boo wanted to rip his throat out, the rest of him clamoring that Boo was kissing him, actually kissing him on the neck. He could feel Boo’s lips moving gently against his skin, and though he could also tell that there were fangs behind them, he didn’t care at all. He hadn’t been kissed at all, anywhere, in so long, and if this wasn’t really kissing, but rather what Boo had distantly called ‘mouth touches’ earlier, well, it was impossible for his skin to tell the difference.

Boo didn’t stay at the side of his neck. It made a line of kisses up to his jaw, over the lower part of his cheek—and there was really no denying now that they were kisses, kisses from a being very new to the practice of kissing, but kisses nonetheless—

And then Boo kissed him on the lips.

Does Boo understand? Does it? Does it? His mind whirled while Boo lingered at his mouth. Maybe? Probably! He answered himself, as reality began to supersede any of his earlier half-formed fantasies. You were the one torrenting classic Disney to combat depression and the creepy feeling in your apartment!

It was really so absurd. And yet he still felt as though his heart was being cracked open like an egg, and instead of yolk and white flowing out there was all his loneliness and his curiosity and his fear and his wonder and his desire. There was so much of all of it, more than he’d ever realized he was holding onto, and it made it impossible to think lightly of kissing Boo.

Oh well.

He kissed Boo back. He kissed Boo back and raised his hands to touch Boo in return. It had said it liked his warmth; let it have the warmth of his hands, then, roving along the smooth, dry skin of its spindly form, back and waist and shoulders.

Boo gasped at Zander’s touch, and let itself sink down onto him, its narrow body pressing full against Zander’s soft and substantial chest and belly. Boo twined its fingers into Zander’s hair, and even that eagerness pierced his heart—his grown-out hair wasn’t neglect and isolation to Boo, it was something new and wonderful to touch. Zander closed his eyes, thrilling at the light touch of claws on his scalp and no longer trying to distance himself from any desire he felt. Boo was doing exactly what it had told him it wanted to do, so why not enjoy it? He hoped, oh he hoped that Boo was taking pleasure in these moments, because he was; he felt like he wasn’t just unwinding thanks to the ability to touch someone, but like he might unravel entirely, lose all the stress and constraint of having a form.

Maybe that wasn’t the best simile, considering Boo’s existence, but was he supposed to come up with a better one while making out with the thing under the bed?

He held Boo ever closer, and with very little conscious thought, slipped his tongue past Boo’s lips. He brushed up against Boo’s fangs, and his body tried to set off every alarm system that it had. However, most of his systems were already highly occupied, and all the signals of his nerves and hormones could only merge. He felt like he was blushing all over, like he’d been given a jolt of electricity just this side of lethal, and, oh yeah, his cock was now straining at the fabric of his boxers. He hadn’t gotten so hard, so fast, in a long while. His state would be immediately obvious to anyone familiar with hard-ons; the question was, did that include Boo?

Boo made a soft sound in its throat and pulled away from Zander just far enough to speak. “I—you—I can feel your desire,” it said.

That sounded way too much like a euphemism in a novel where the author wasn’t allowed to say “cock” and Zander was momentarily baffled as to why Boo was talking like that. But then—Boo lived off his fear. Boo could tell when Zander was wondering at him. So when Boo said it could feel his desire, that’s literally what it meant.

And was that a good thing? Well—

Boo sat up, laughing a little. It ran its long, strange hands boldly over Zander’s chest and belly, and Zander could see the glint of its terrible, sexy fangs in the streetlight as it grinned. “Zander. Zander. Zaaaander. You like it when I touch you and—I don’t know if any boogeyman has ever felt this. And I don’t care. It’s so good. I can’t tell if feeling your body under my hands or feeling your desire is better. What—what am I doing that makes you want me? I—I want to do more of that.”

“Boo—I—it’s easy to want you when you’re touching me like I’m the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen in your life!”

“You are,” Boo said, continuing to caress him with earnest hands. “And your desire…” It took a shaky breath. “I had noticed it, before. It was always faint because it wasn’t directed at me. But I was still curious because it was something of you.” Boo’s touches became lighter, but not teasing. It traced a claw around Zander’s nipple, almost shyly.

Zander shivered, but it felt like he was almost feverish, how hot he was. How much of a strange dream all this seemed. “Boo,” he whispered.

“I never realized what it would be like to have desire directed toward me,” it said. “I only hoped to touch you and try to satisfy my own desire, but now I—I think I might be insatiable.”

Zander reached out and covered one of Boo’s hands with his own. “Hey, Boo. We can figure it out. I mean—you’re doing things with your body, with me, that you’ve never done before. I mean, there’s probably some way you can be satisfied. You just don’t know it yet.”

“Yes.” Again, that alien sibilance, and Zander found that a monster accepting his promise to help satisfy it somehow only made him impossibly harder. And he should probably say something about that, but what? Boo had clearly been in the room, at least, while Zander had taken himself in hand, but how much did it understand about what he had been doing?

“Boo,” he began, “this desire that you’re feeling from me to you, it’s…there’s a physical component—”

“Yes,” Boo interrupted. “I’ve noticed it all. The speeding of your heart, but not in fear. The slight changes in your scent. The hardening of your nipples and your cock.”

To hear Boo say “cock” was nearly as disorienting as when Zander thought he was using a euphemism. But then, what other word would it know for penis? It would have had to learn from the porn Zander watched to associate any word with the actual body part.

“Okay,” Zander said, his feelings about Boo watching him masturbate much more ambiguous now that it had apparently been the case in reality, “then you probably know some, uh, other things.”

“Yes, and I…” Boo hesitated.

“Boo, if you don’t want to do anything with my cock, I, well, it’s not what my body’s hoping for, but I can deal.”

“No, that’s not…” Boo flipped its hand over and squeezed Zander’s, really seeming nervous now. “I’ve touched you, and you’ve touched me back, and it felt—it felt so good. I didn’t know the kinds of things my nerves could tell me. I don’t know to say all this. But I’m not shying away because I don’t want to give you the most pleasure that I can. Now that I know I can.”

“Well, all right, do you just need a little guidance or—”

“Maybe, but first I need to show you—” Boo broke off, and lifted itself up, moving forwards until its knees were on either side of Zander’s waist. Its fingers fluttered and it dropped Zander’s hand. “I changed myself when you were in the bathroom. I said I wanted to try hair, but that’s not all I did.”

Zander’s eyes widened. He didn’t want to look too surprised, considering how shy Boo seemed now, but if this was going in the direction he guessed it was, it seemed almost impossible not to be surprised.

Boo picked up Zander’s hand again. It guided him to the place between Boo’s legs. “I don’t know if I did it right. But I made this change before I knew how much you wanted me, because I knew how much I wanted you.”

Zander looked up at Boo, trying to get a glimpse of its face as he left his fingers gently resting against where they had been placed. But then again, what could Boo’s expression tell him that Boo’s actions didn’t? Boo had made an orifice, apparently on the wild wish of an off-chance (or so it had thought) that “touching Zander” would lead into “getting fucked by Zander.” He allowed himself a moment to ask himself if this was too weird but shoved the question away before answering himself. It was the wrong question. Tonight was about Boo and him, and if it was weird it didn’t matter. There were better questions. “Boo, do you want me to be inside you?”

“Yes,” Boo said, quietly, and with no hesitation.

Zander traced his fingers around the edge of the opening Boo had led him to, and he heard Boo pant above him. I wonder if I can make your nerves tell you some really incomprehensible things, he thought, as he continued to carefully stroke Boo. “Any particular word you’d like for this new part of you?” The question wasn’t just a courtesy. Zander wasn’t hugely experienced, but he had enough practical knowledge to know that what he was feeling wasn’t really like any human orifice.

“Oh,” Boo said, again sounding embarrassed even as it breathed heavily and tilted its hips towards Zander’s hand, “I—I don’t really know—it’s just a hole. Is that all right?”

“It’s fine, it’s fine,” Zander said. With his free hand he stroked Boo’s side and bony hip, doing his best to clear his mind of any negative reaction. Boo had claimed “it”; Boo had a hole. That was all there was to it. Nit-picking the language used by a wondrous, unknown creature was no way to proceed.

Especially not when that wondrous, unknown creature was relaxing and opening thanks to his fingers. “I’m going to put a finger inside you,” Zander said, and Boo made a soft sound in its throat, followed by another as Zander did exactly as he said. Inside, Boo was slick, wet—biological details that it had to have chosen. Zander didn’t know exactly how Boo formed their body, but this didn’t seem like something it had come up with on the spur of the moment. “I think you did really well, remaking yourself this way,” Zander said. It felt like another of his fingers could slip in easily, so he tried, and was right. Boo pressed its hips towards his hand, and when Zander started to gently thrust with his fingers, Boo soon started moving in counterpoint with him, seeking deeper stokes, seeking to be filled. Its smooth inner muscles wrapped around his fingers with a tight strength that made his cock throb and ache in anticipation.

But he’d be careful, no matter how much his body was screaming for Boo. He was giving it its first time, after all, and, well, he wanted to prove himself worthy of its obsession with him.

“Boo, tonight wasn’t the first time you thought about making yourself a hole, was it?” he asked softly.  

“I thought about it but I—I couldn’t think about thinking about it,” Boo said. “A boogeyman doesn’t—but I tried to figure out how to construct myself for pleasure—the plan was ready in my mind when you said I could touch.”

“It feels like it was worth the effort,” Zander said. “You feel good to me, Boo. How wet you are, how tightly you hold my fingers—I just want to know if you feel good in yourself, like this?”

Boo took a shuddery breath. “I feel—wonderful,” it said. “I don’t have any way to compare this with my existence as an ordinary boogeyman. And still—the bodies I make have a lot to do with yours. The nerves I make are based on yours—you’re the only living thing in my space. So—is your whole body this attuned to pleasure, too?”

“You know, I think I read that humans do have some nerves that are just meant to feel good when we’re caressed,” Zander said. “Like this.” He ran his hand down Boo’s side, over its hip, down its thigh. Amazing that Boo could instinctively create all the complexity of a living body, that it could guide those instincts when it wanted to—when it developed new and strange desires. And was Boo still changing? During those first touches, Boo had hardly seemed to give off any heat, but now, now it felt distinctly warm, more alive, more fleshly, than ever.

“Then why—why are you not always touching?” Boo asked. Its hand slid up his arm and tangled in his hair.

Unexpected tears burned in the corner of Zander’s eyes. “We—we want to be. I think we really want to be. But sometimes we can’t.”

Boo bent its face close to his, as terrifying and wonderful as ever. “I don’t understand,” it said. “But I am here to touch you now, and you are here to touch me, now. We can have this pleasure of touch and touch-back.”

“Yes,” Zander said. “You’re right, you’re right.” He smiled a little; started moving his fingers in Boo again. Boo arched its back, raising its long body.

“This feels—I don’t understand, but I want more,” Boo said. “I—I showed you my hole with your hand to—to show you it was there. But I want to feel your cock inside me.”

That disorienting shift—from the alien first-timer to the pornographically familiar. Zander wasn’t sure he was getting used to it, but he was certainly ready to roll with it. “Yes—I—I think we’ll both like that.” Boo smiled and reached down between them, and with claws that Zander now realized must be much sharper than he had been thinking, deftly reduced his shorts to rags and tossed them away. It should have been terrifying, but Boo hadn’t dealt him even the slightest scratch. There was only delight in this destruction, and as Zander’s cock stood free, it was practically dripping, just like Boo’s hole.

Despite both their states, Zander reached over to the bedside table and took a small bottle of lube out of the drawer. It would never be a bad thing to have, especially in this uncharted territory. He slicked himself up more carefully than usual, trying to ignore any sensation for the moment. “All right, Boo,” he said, about to guide them back that crucial small distance, when a thought occurred to him. “Do you like the position we’re in now? You on top, and me underneath?”

“Does it make a difference?” Boo asked. “I’m ready. I want to be filled.”

So matter-of-fact when it said these things! It wasn’t trying to seduce him, and yet he was as seduced as he’d ever been!

“With you on top you have more control over how deep you take me. The—the pace, also. But if you were underneath me—how do I even put this? You wouldn’t have to constantly be deciding how to fuck? You could just let yourself feel, if you wanted to do that?”

“Oh,” Boo said slowly. “I think I like the sound of that.” It grinned. “I’ve spent a lot of time under you with the bed in the way. I’d love to find out what it’s like with nothing in between us.”

Amazing, Zander thought. Amazing. Humor, or a very near relative of it. Just another thing that a boogeyman wouldn’t strictly need to survive, but that this wondrous being was able to use.

With Boo on the bed, and only the streetlamp providing light, it was harder for Zander to see it than ever. But there were glimmers enough, of eyes, of teeth. There was suggestion enough, in the subtle variation of shadows. Boo’s new, messy hair spread out on the pillow. The long, narrow shape of its body, with all its suggestions of curiously attached muscles. And now, rising into the clarity offered by the streetlamp, Boo’s strange hand, with its fearsome claws. It cupped Zander’s cheek and he nuzzled against it.

“Even now that I’ve touched you, I’m still going to love looking at you,” Boo said. “I understand that now. I’d thought it was just something to go before touching. But now I know more about pleasure, and I know that looking is a pleasure, too.”

Zander quashed the impulse to laugh this off, to say something cliché about flattery. He didn’t want to build any barriers between them for Boo’s first time, for Boo’s sake. And for his own sake, he didn’t want to force any distance between himself and someone who so plainly and earnestly desired him.

So he didn’t say anything that went back to himself. “You’re the most astonishing being I’ve ever seen, Boo.” And he leaned down and kissed it. Boo sighed and arched up towards him, a vivid reminder of what they both so wanted. He ran his hand lightly down Boo’s body, traced the path of its hipbones, and again found that soft, wet opening. Boo had said it was just a hole, but it was incredible that it had made one at all—that it had gone so far outside its version of normality as a boogeyman in the hope of making a sexual connection. Zander could only hope that Boo would find it everything it’d hoped for. He eased the head of his cock against Boo’s hole, and, taking a deep breath, slid inside the body of his boogeyman.

Immediately, Boo grabbed his shoulders with its hands, its claws pricking against his skin. The tiny points of pain were immediately subsumed in the heat of desire, however, as Boo lifted its hips urgently against Zander’s.

“Am I really giving you this much pleasure?” Boo asked, sounding dazed.

Zander gave a single, breathy laugh. “Just you wait.” He hoped the connection between them would be strong, that it would help Boo figure out how it could find the satisfaction and relief that Zander knew he was going to find in Boo. He began to thrust shallowly, Boo at once joining him in his rhythm.

“Yes,” Boo said, a sigh and a hiss at once. “Yes.” Its hands crept over him in ever-greedy caresses, boldly grasping handfuls of his flesh with alien, yet ardent, delight and desire. Its wet heat held him close, inner muscles tightening around his cock every time he withdrew. It drove all thoughts of biological artistry from Zander’s mind, leaving room only for the thrill of this deepest, closest touch.

“Tell me—tell me what you want,” Zander said. “Want to make you feel—as good as I do.”

“I don’t know, I don’t know—” Boo wrapped its long legs around Zander and pulled him closer. “Just—more, more. Harder, faster!”

Boo’s groan of pleasure when Zander obeyed was nearly his undoing. He had no clear idea at all how he managed to hold back, save that he suddenly craved to know what other sounds he could coax from Boo. Every little moan, every little gasp seemed to speak volumes, but volumes that would contain only the simplest statements, over and over again. I want you. I need you. You feel good on me, you feel good in me. But what more needed to be said in the bizarre little paradise his apartment had become? It could never be shared, never be explained, but that didn’t matter. It only mattered that he was real, and Boo was real, and no matter how astonishing their first meeting, they were both finally getting the touch they had been so desperate for.

Zander bent to kiss Boo’s fanged mouth, their disparate bodies pressing together as if there was no reason for them ever to have been apart.

“Zander,” Boo said softly, breaking the kiss for a moment, and Zander smiled down at it and impulsively nuzzled his cheek against its. Then, “Zander!” Boo cried out, baffled and worshipful, arching up against him and clenching around him tighter than ever before.

The thought “did I just make my boogeyman come?” just barely had time to form in Zander’s mind before his thrusts lost their steadiness and his own orgasm washed over him in a bright wave of pleasure.

“Zander,” Boo murmured, once they had both collected themselves a little and were lying side by side, “I want to sleep here. In your bed. With you.”

“No going back, huh? I’m happy with that.” He lightly ran his hand down Boo’s arm. “But what if you sleep too deeply? I can close my blackout curtains, of course, but they haven’t worked great here and the sun might still get through. I don’t want you to get injured after all the—all the good things of tonight.”

“I’m not worried. I…even if I’ve changed, I’m still a boogeyman. I’ll wake when the light is too much. And I feel like…I have reserves of energy. Even more than I did at the start of the night.”

“Well, all right,” Zander said. “I’m going to guess that you won’t mind cuddling?”

Boo flashed a grin. “Oh no, never.”

*

When Zander woke he wasn’t disoriented that Boo was in his bed; he knew very well he hadn’t been dreaming last night. But he was surprised that he was able to see Boo so clearly. The sun wasn’t fully up yet, but it was undeniably dawn. And Boo was still sleeping peacefully, an absurdly elongated little spoon. Zander did want to spend some time looking at Boo, at the form it had made of both instinct and desire, but its description of the terrible effects of the sun made him reach out and shake its shoulder instead.

Boo blinked sleepily, as if it had a lot of experience with sleeping and not just phasing out of existence during the day. “The daylight, Boo! The daylight!”

It yawned, revealing every single one of its astonishing fangs. “Can’t be daylight,” it said. “You have more uncomfortable lamps.”

“Boo, really!” Zander started trying to move Boo’s miles of limbs around so he could get out of bed and get to the blackout curtains. Why hadn’t he just taken the time to close them last night? It wouldn’t have hurt, it might have helped, and now Boo was way too close to being burned by the sun for the second time because of him! And apparently it was too disoriented? Unused to waking up? To stop hindering Zander from trying to keep it safe—wow, how weird, to go from terrified to protective of one’s boogeyman within a few hours—wait. Did the boogeyman thing explain the situation he was having right now? He was afraid for Boo, Boo naturally did things that were scary, and so Boo’s arms and legs were trapping him in his bed. It was the same thing as not being able to run in a nightmare.

Zander flopped back down and tried to calm himself. Boo was a grown boogeyman, much older than Zander if he’d correctly deciphered its comments on when it had come to exist. If it was going to take these risks, let it! It had come back from the other sunburn just fine!

Zander had maybe three seconds of calm before Boo sat upright quickly enough to make the bed springs squeak. “This IS sunlight!”

“Yeah, and don’t you need to hide from it?”

“I…I hide from light because it hurts me. Or it hurt me.” Boo slowly turned one of its hands back and forth in the dawn light. “But I barely feel anything now. It’s just a tingle. I think the light still might be dissolving me, but somehow it’s so much easier to heal, now. More sunlight would probably still be too much. But I don’t feel any need to dissolve for the length of the day.” It frowned. “I have changed.”

“Boo.” Zander sat up. “How?”

“I couldn’t have guessed…” Boo spoke softly. “But then again, maybe I am the same. Maybe this is part of being a boogeyman, but a boogeyman that followed its instincts, a boogeyman without a Zander, would have only ever tasted fear.” It fixed its gaze back on Zander. “You wondered at me. You were curious about me. You felt desire for me. And now, this morning, you were afraid for me. All of these emotions…I think they are more powerful than your everyday fear. At least for me. At least when they come from you.” It paused, and when it spoke again a note of trepidation had crept into its voice. “Do you think you could continue to wonder at me? I…want to have continuity. In your space. With you. If I don’t have to worry about the sunlight so much, and staying out of sight…there are so many ways I could do more than just exist.”

“Boo.” Zander took its hand. “I think I’ll be wondering at you for a long, long time.” He paused. “Do you still need fear, specifically, now?”

Boo shrugged. “Nightmares are always enough for a boogeyman. I just…ended up different.”

“I’m glad you did,” Zander said. “I’m glad you ended up different with me.” Boo immediately sprawled around him in a clumsy embrace, and Zander laughed. “But it’s a hell of a time to start being part of the world, you know?”

“No, I don’t know,” Boo said.

Zander sighed, though he smiled, too. “Well. I’ll be here as you figure it out. Now, let’s find a safe place for you to spend the day.” And though he didn’t say anything then, the question still bloomed within him—if wonder can carry you through the dawn, what might love do?

[destiniesfic]

132 Hours, Chapter 3:

“Let me step on your back,” I say abruptly.

Previous

Read chapter 3 on AO3, or read below:

“Sherlock Holmes.”

I barely have to think about it. “Sherlock Holmes was an omega.”

“No.” Cardan sounds totally affronted. “No way. How can you even say that?”

For lack of anything better to do, we have been playing this game for nearly an hour. Mostly fictional characters, but some historical figures, too, who are up for debate. As much as alphas would love to lay claim to every known conqueror, it just isn’t realistic. Cardan and I have already gone back and forth on Alexander the Great and Ivan the Terrible and Ghengis Khan. Designations live in a kind of middle space between gender and sexual orientation, so people make assumptions based on the way you present in society, but also whether you’re an alpha, an omega, or a mythical beta is, technically, no one’s business but yours. So, especially in older stories, these things go unsaid or are discreetly left for the reader to surmise.

“Why would he be an alpha?” I challenge.

Cardan is sitting in his corner, one leg propped up, elbow on knee, same as before. He shrugs. “I mean, he feels empowered to take charge in crime scene investigations, he’s assertive—”

“You’re thinking of the BBC reboot,” I scoff. “The way Conan Doyle wrote his Holmes wasn’t like that. He was an expert, yes, and knew it, but he admitted it when someone bested him, and he went out of his way to help vulnerable people. People who had been scammed, or… single women.”

As bad as it seems for omegas and women—especially omega women—now, it would have been even worse in the stratified Victorian era. We still have our strata, but they were more codified then:

Alpha men

Alpha women/omega men (depending on the situation)

Omega women

And, of course, it was all way worse when race and class got thrown in. The point is that someone like Violet Smith of “The Solitary Cyclist”—a woman, assumed omega, and poor—would have been in real trouble without Holmes’ help.

“So he’s an omega because he’s nice to widows?” Cardan asks, with a glare.

“No, he’s an omega because he pays attention,” I reply. “Alphas don’t need to pay attention the way Sherlock Holmes does. You just waltz in and traipse all over whatever or whoever and always get your way. Who cares about the details when you’re an alpha? But Sherlock Holmes looks hard at the little things. You don’t do that if you don’t have to, if you’re not used to walking into a room and assessing threats, figuring out the balance of power. All the time. Because it’s exhausting, but you have to do it.”

Cardan is quiet for a beat too long, and I realize I may have actually said more about myself than about Sherlock Holmes. But he spares me by saying, “Surely we’re not all that bad.”

I make a noncommittal sound.

“Your dad’s an alpha, right?” he continues. “He took you and Taryn in after your parents died. He didn’t have to do that.”

I have to keep myself from snorting. No one who’s met Madoc would ever describe him as particularly nice or even giving. “Did you know Vivi has a pet conspiracy theory that he killed our parents in the first place?”

“What?”

“Not himself, obviously. That he hired someone to sabotage the car we were in.” I don’t know why I tell him. The second it leaves my mouth it feels like a family secret, or an in-joke I’m not supposed to share. But I can’t stop talking. “I mean, it was just luck we weren’t killed, Taryn and Vivi and I. But my parents’ car was new. The brakes shouldn’t have given out like they did. Anyway, Vivi thinks he took us in because he felt guilty.”

“I mean, that’s… crazy to think your dad was involved.” But Cardan says it too slowly, and hastens to add, “He isn’t a supervillain.”

“Yeah, I know. Just with everything that happened after, the way he swooped in, she was always suspicious.” I feel my mouth twitch, but I don’t know whether I want to smile or scowl. “I think she wanted us to be like The Boxcar Children and run away to live in the woods.”

“Well, you’re getting the one-room, no-running-water experience now.”

I catch myself smiling—he’s funny—and force my mouth into a frown, scouring our little room again for anything useful. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Even the socket that would hold a bare lightbulb is empty. Finally, my eyes settle on the one tiny window, set close to the ceiling, letting in a meager amount of natural light that does seem to have grown brighter as we talked.

“Let me step on your back,” I say abruptly.

“You want to what?”

“Step on your back,” I repeat, exasperated. “Are you tall enough to reach that window without a stool?”

“No?”

“Well, neither am I.” I fold my arms. “So I’m going to need you to give me a boost.”

He arches a critical eyebrow. “Why don’t you just sit on my shoulders?”

I blink at him. “Because… I thought you wouldn’t want to put your head anywhere near my crotch? Given how I reek and all.”

“But you thought I’d want to be stepped on? Jesus.” Cardan rubs a hand over his face. “What do you think I’m into? Look, I’ll crouch down, you get on my shoulders and look out the window. It’s not like I’m putting my face in your vag.” I shudder, and he adds, “We’ll never have to talk about it again. Okay?”

“Sounds great to me,” I say.

He nods and crouches down. I am not prepared for the way my heart thumps in my chest at the sight of the guy who made my life miserable since I was in seventh grade, who pushed me during gym, who whispered vile things in my ear whenever he could, who empowered other kids to do the same or worse waiting for me to climb onto his shoulders with his head bowed. It’s not real power, it’s just temporary, but it is intoxicating.

Then Cardan says, “Taking your time, huh?” and I snap out of it.

“Why the rush?” I ask. “Got somewhere to be?”

“I was thinking anywhere but here would be great.” He looks up at me. “Whenever you’re ready.”

I swing my legs over him and let him hoist me up on his shoulders. I haven’t exactly been invited to participate in a ton of games of chicken fight in the pool, so it’s been some time since anyone carried me like this. Maybe not since Taryn and I were very small, just after our parents died, when Madoc would help us get things from high kitchen shelves. I gasp when I’m lifted. Cardan is strong enough that it seems effortless, but I also hear him let out a small grunt.

“Not a word,” I say, dreading the jab he might make about my weight. “Move me closer to the window.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” Cardan mutters, but he obliges.

I am extremely conscious of his hands on my bare thighs, the way his muscles shift under my shoulders. Some alphas, like the guy who tried to grab me at the party, are kind of muscle-bound in an unattractive way. Not Cardan. Cardan has just the right amount to be fit and lean, with the bare minimum amount of body fat, but not so much muscle that he tips over into ungraceful. He’s a sports car of a person, lithe and elegant. It’s no mystery why his shirtless TikToks get so many views.

I get my hands on the windowsill so he’s not bearing my full weight, and then I groan. “Bad news.”

“What?”

“Well, I definitely can’t fit through here. I can kind of see the sky, so I would guess it’s maybe ten a.m. Otherwise there’s just a window well. Plastic and dirt. I can’t make out our surroundings at all.” I sigh. “We’re in a basement.”

There’s an awkward pause, and then Cardan says, “At least we know for sure.”

“Yeah. Put me down?”

He does, and we go back to our respective seats, mentally reviewing what we know. The only door is, of course, locked from outside. The floor is bare concrete, the ceiling exposed insulation and tubing, so we might be in a storeroom of some kind, or an unfinished basement in an older house. Our kidnappers left us with absolutely nothing, so no phones. Even my keychain, with the Swiss army knife Madoc gave me before my first summer at sleep-away camp, is gone.

We are growing hungrier and more sullen with each passing minute when there is a knock at the door.

Cardan and I glance at each other from our opposite sides of the room. “Um,” I say. Are kidnappers supposed to be polite?

Cardan shrugs one shoulder, then straightens up, lifting his chin in a decidedly imperious way. Trying to summon some air of command, some macho alpha-ness that will help us out of this. It could work—it is half working on me, I begrudgingly admit to myself, because my stupid brain is wired that way—if we weren’t both grimy from sitting on the floor and still a little woozy from the drugs.

“Come in,” he calls.

The door is opened slightly, and the first thing to poke through it is the barrel of a pistol. A 9mm, by the looks of it. Cardan’s Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows.

“You kids willing to behave?” comes a voice. It’s a man’s voice, strangely melodious. I was expecting the sandpapery roughness of an old-school gangster. I know it’s stereotypical, but I’ve never been kidnapped before, and it’s not like they make a manual.

Cardan and I glance at each other again. I’m not sure what we’re looking to find in each other’s faces.

“Yeah,” I say. “We’re good.”

“Oh, good. I’d hate to shoot you.” The man pushes the door open the rest of the way, and I have to press my lips shut to keep from gasping. There are disfiguring scars that cut across his cheeks, down his jaw, even one across the bridge of his nose. I’m not even sure what makes scars like that, jagged and rough-edged. If it was a knife, it wasn’t clean work. Someone was making a point.

I am immediately relieved, though, because his resonant voice had made me think we could be dealing with a real alpha, someone whose words hold command. This man is of average height, average build. If not for the scars, for the obviously broken nose, he would be totally unremarkable.

“Who are you?” Cardan asks. I am reluctantly impressed that he manages to sound haughty in this situation. He’s sitting up straight with his back against the wall, one leg outstretched, the other bent, his foot planted on the floor. He’s resting his elbow on that knee, like it’s all effortless.

“Breakfast service,” replies the man, still pointing the pistol at us. He tosses a McDonald’s bag into the room, then he and the gun retreat, and the door shuts behind him. We hear the click of a lock and then, to my horror, the sound of a deadbolt sliding into place.

Cardan exhales and reaches for the bag.

“Don’t!” I exclaim. “Seriously, it might be drugged.”

“It—what?” he asks. “Now you decide to care about whether the food is drugged? This isn’t Flowers in the Attic, Jude. We’re hostages. They want to ransom us. They’re not going to poison us.”

I blink at him. “Flowers in the Attic? You’ve read a book?”

He rolls his eyes and reaches for the bag. “Well, if you’re not going to eat it, I will.”

When he opens the bag, the smell of sausage grease and egg hit me like a truck. My stomach growls. I am suddenly very aware that the last time I ate was before the party, and my nerves had kept me from eating much then. “What… is it?”

“Two McMuffins.” He looks up at me. “See? They don’t want to starve us. They’re keeping us alive.”

“They could still tamper with them. Sedatives or something. Keep us complacent, keep us from doing what we’re going to do, which is try to escape.”

Cardan arches an eyebrow. “Has anyone ever told you you’re unbelievably paranoid?”

I think of Taryn and purse my lips. “Did you know it wouldn’t kill you to take something seriously?”

He holds up one hand, fingers spread wide. “Okay. How about this. I eat a McMuffin because I am fucking starving, and if they put anything in it it’ll get me and work through my system faster. You can stay up scheming or whatever. If nothing happens after like fifteen minutes, you get to eat yours. Or if you decide to be stubborn, I’ll eat it. Deal?”

“It’ll be cold and gross.” I cross my arms. “But fine.”

“Good.” Cardan takes a McMuffin out of the bag—his hands are so big that it barely looks like enough food for him—and devours it in what must be record time. I turn my head away.

“Where’s the nearest McDonald’s, do you think?” I ask

“Huh?”

“We were in East Hampton. They don’t have one there.”

“Uh-huh. That’s a good point.” I look back to see Cardan sucking grease off his thumb. “Dunno. Closer to the middle of the island, maybe?”

“Maybe,” I echo quietly. Without knowing how long we were out, it seems impossible to figure out where they could have taken us. “You’re right. We couldn’t be in the city.”

Cardan shakes his head. “Nah, don’t think so. Too quiet, and like you said, that’s definitely daylight, so people’d be out and about.”

“Yeah,” I say, looking up at the window.

He looks at the window, too, but doesn’t say anything, and we lapse into silence. It’s strange, to be sharing space with him, to be quiet. I could never have imagined anything like it, not with our fraught history. There’s no world in which Cardan Greenbriar and I could be friends, but, at least temporarily, we are not enemies.

“Did you like it?” I asked at last, when the silence stops being neutral and begins to make me feel anew how tired and tense I am.

“Like what?”

“Flowers in the Attic.”

“Oh.” He blinks twice, his dark eyelashes fluttering. “I read it a few years ago, but, yeah. I did. You know, it was nice to read about a family that was more fucked up than mine.” He raises his eyebrows. “Spicy, too.”

I scoff. “How can your family be so fucked up you’d read a gothic novel for catharsis?”

Cardan drums his fingers on his knee. “How much do you know about my family?”

“You’re old money. One of those alpha families that claims they’re pure alpha for generations.” Which is pretty much impossible, but everyone in that tier of society tells the same lie. Half the kids in my school claim to be pure alpha, and on paper both of their parents are alphas. But while alpha men and women can reproduce—they have the right gametes—it’s not easy. More likely omega egg donors, and, before that, omega surrogates who were well-paid. It’s no wonder they see us as breeders.

I start ticking off additional facts on my fingers. “Your great-grandfather was one of the great American magnates, but it was his alpha daughter, Mab Greenbriar, who really made something of his millions. Your dad was her only son, so he inherited the whole corporation. You have five older siblings: Balekin, Elowyn, Dain, Caelia, Rhyia—”

Cardan holds up both his hands. “Yeah, yeah. I get the point.”

“It’s all on Wikipedia.” I shrug, and to sound less like a weird stalker, I add, “And Vivi and Rhyia are like best friends.”

“You know, and I know you said it before, but I do forget Vivienne’s your sister. She’s so cool.”

I roll my eyes. “Thanks.”

I get it, though. He probably thinks Vivi’s cool because she’s an alpha, but she also gets points for being the family rebel. Her biological dad, Madoc, adopted us all after the car crash that killed our parents, but she never wanted to be the natural successor he hoped for. Now she plays rugby at an all-girls’ college, has three cartilage studs and a septum piercing, shaves half her head, and is defiantly, unapologetically queer. It’s a different path than I would take, but marching to the beat of your own drum is definitely something that appeals to people.

“By the way,” Cardan says, “it’s been a few minutes and I feel fine. Well, as fine as one can feel having eaten only one McMuffin. I don’t feel any worse.”

“Okay.” I hold out my hand. “Toss me the bag.”

The bag crinkles when he picks it up, then he looks inside. “I think I’m owed a poison taster’s fee.”

“Huh?”

Cardan takes my McMuffin out of the bag, takes a bite out of it, then drops it back in the bag, which he proceeds to lob at my head. I catch it, face wrinkling in disgust. “Ew!”

“What? I need the calories more.”

I shake the bag at him. “I am not eating this,” I huff.

“We split the water bottle. That didn’t kill you.” Cardan sits back against the wall and closes his eyes. “Besides, who knows when they’re going to decide to feed us again?”

“You’re all so gross,” I mutter as I open the bag and pull out my breakfast. He’s right, and I hate that he’s right. I also hate that my hunger is enough to overcome my revulsion, at both the stolen bite and the undeniable fact that my McMuffin is now cold. I stuff it in my mouth, devouring the rest of it in only a few bites.

“Who’s gross?” he asks. “Alphas? Boys?”

“Alpha boys,” I inform him, with my mouth full.

“Big words from somebody whose designation’s known for leaking fluids everywhere.”

I fold my arms over my chest. “We’re not the only designation that leaks,” I point out. “We’re just the only one that gets shit for it. We’re the ones who’re thought of as gross while you and your type get to go around ruling the world.”

“Oh, sure. That has nothing to do with the way you guys are totally incapacitated for three straight days if you don’t take your drugs.”

“If we don’t get out of here, you’ll be just as screwed as I am,” I snap. “Stuck in a room with me? You won’t have a chance. We’re both going to become brainless fuck machines if that happens, so… shut the hell up.”

He does, to my surprise. I do too. I wipe my greasy hands on the McDonald’s bag, then crumple it into a little ball and toss it into the corner of the room. My anger is a living thing, running through my veins like electricity, vibrating under my skin. It’s been there for so long, but I would never have dared to say that to his face before. The rest of our situation is so absurd, so dire, it feels like there are no consequences for mouthing off at him.

That’s dumb, of course. There are always consequences. But at least they won’t be coming anytime soon.

“‘Brainless fuck machines,’” Cardan whispers quietly, and then he snickers.

“You—shut up,” I say, feeling unlikely mirth bubbling at the corners of my mouth. Cardan lets out another huff of laughter, and then I am giggling, and he’s laughing outright, clutching at his stomach. It’s ridiculous, all of my nerves coming out like that, but he’s laughing and it feels like there’s nothing for me to do but laugh too.

“Oh, man,” he says, wiping at his eyes. “I didn’t know you were a poet.”

“I’m serious!” I squeal, my abs cramping from laughing and trying not to laugh harder all at once. “That’s what happens!”

“God.” Cardan lets his head fall softly into the corner. “We are so screwed.” He points one finger up in the air. “Metaphorically. So far.”

“Jesus.” I cover my face with both of my hands. “Jesus.”

“Jesus was an alpha.”

I peek at him through my fingers. “He was not. He literally said ‘I am the Alpha and the Omega.’”

“I’m just fucking with you.” Cardan grins, his hair flopping in his face, but then his cheer vanishes abruptly. “Wait, you’re not actually religious, are you?”

I shake my head. “Not really.” But I still know that common theology holds that Jesus—and angels, and any other holy beings I don’t know about—are not alphas or omegas, but they aren’t betas, either. They are all things and nothing. Must be a good life. I pull my hands down and squint at him. “Were you worried about offending me?”

“Me?” Cardan shakes his head to toss his hair out of his face. “Nah.”

“Well, good.” I cross my arms again. “Because you’ve never cared before, and it’d really freak me out if you started now. Then I’d know we were both losing it for real.”

“I just thought…” He shrugs. “I mean, it’d be nice if one of us believed in something. That praying could help. I’d like to believe that. Seems tidy.”

“Yeah.” I let my cheek fall against the cold wall, too, and blink away the memories of screaming at the night sky, demanding someone give me my parents back. I can’t fall into that pit. I will not.

I just say, “I stopped believing that anyone was listening a long time ago.”

Cardan scratches at the wall with his finger. “Me too, Duarte,” he said. “Me too.”

Next

[random-imagines-blog]

Scars {Maria Hill x Reader Oneshot}

Requested by: Anonymous Wordcount: 3266 Summary: You’re afraid of your own fire powers; Maria, however, is not, even when you do accidentally burn a house down. Notes: Swearing; Minor Death

You were careful to never leave your hands, or your arms, exposed to others. The SHIELD uniform did a good job of that, covering your body like another skin, and then the gloves which slipped over your fingers smoothly. They had heat sensors wired inside of the fabric that helped to tell your body temperature, particularly if you were heating up. It warned you by shining lights inside, changing the color of the glove as a warning that you were getting too heated. Dangerous things could happen when that was the case. It was a handy little suit that they gave you, full of such technological innovations. If only other aspects of your life were as helpful; like if only you had powers that were more useful than accidentally starting forest fires, or burning marshmallows when attempting to make smores.

At least the carrier that you worked on, alongside many other agents, wasn’t made of wood and timber, but rather many different types of metal which didn’t easily melt. You weren’t considered a total liability. SHIELD, Nick Fury in particular, believed that your brain was better than your powers, and wanted you to work by his side, as his third in command, just in case something was to happen to Maria Hill.

Ahh, Maria. She was one of the reasons why you wished life could be just a little bit simpler. If all you had to worry about was SHIELD’s disapproval of employees dating one another. Where the worst thing that could happen was getting fired if you were caught sneaking around during off-shift hours. You were in love with the woman, and had been since you met her. God, she was absolutely beautiful, even though she held the same stern facial expression ninety percent of the time. But occasionally, if you caught her in a good moment, she would smile or she would laugh and it was like a field of butterflies on an already beautiful day.

“There you are!” A loud voice said, coming to you from across the hallway. You looked up to see Nick Fury walking towards you, and you instantly straightened up your posture, going from daydreaming to work mode. “I wanted you in the control room five minutes ago!”

“Yes sir. Sorry sir,” You said, chasticizing yourself. There were many rules on board the aircaft, but there was one that was especially important. Always, always, always be on time when Nick Fury wanted you somewhere. You strode beside him, small steps, hands by your side. Your eyes always seemed to wander to them, making sure that they were the color that they were supposed to be. “Is there anything in particular you needed me for, Sir?”

“There’s a mission that I need you and Maria to do for me.”

-

The terrain under the vehicle was far from easy to drive on, and the jeep kept bumping you around. You had to hold on tight to the exterior in order to keep yourself from getting hurt. How Maria was handling it, while driving, was beyond you. A large bump nearly set you falling from the seat, seatbelt be damned. “Now this is what I call off-roading,” You muttered to yourself, but Maria’s keen ears caught you.

“You don’t know the half of it,” She said, eyes forward. “Hold on-” She put her arm out, catching you in the chest as you went over what must have been an ancient log or something, since it broke under the wheels and sent the jeep careening forward. You fell back with a deep breath against the seat.

“Thanks,” You said, taking note of the faint yellow glow coming from your gloves. It was far from orange, so you felt that you were safe from exploding, but you weren’t sure how much more stress that you could take. Being around so many flammable trees didn’t help your nerves in the slightest. “Do you know how much further until we hit a road again?”

“Another minute, I can see it from here,” Maria said. Her tone gave you a hint, and you held onto the door for dear life as the vehicle roared towards the asphalt, did a quick u-turn with the tires squealing and protesting all the way, then rushed forward. Once you were on smooth ground, you were able to relax once more, and put your hands onto your lap.

“You should be a stunt driver in movies if SHIELD doesn’t work out for you,” You said, looking out the window at the jungle that you had come out of. That made Maria laugh, just a single time, then go back to concentrating on the road. Her hair had come out of the bun that she had put it in before driving, and was hanging in her face, framing it wonderfully. She pushed it out of her face, sweat helping to make it stick back.

Yeah, you were smitten.

Since you were on a steady road now, heading towards the destination, you brought out your tablet and went through the mission details again. You were to bring in someone who had done a number of things to violate SHIELD’s protocol. A disgruntled former employee, who had been caught pulling pranks, which was a serious waste of resources. The guy had apparently been spilling secrets, out of date secrets but confidential none-the-less, to criminals who were willing to pay for that sort of information. Blueprints of old carriers, inventories, any weak spots that SHIELD might have.

The guy was clearly an idiot. He was hiding out in Peru, thinking that would keep him safe. As if the renowned SHIELD wouldn’t be able to track him down easier than finding a fly in a web. At least he was in the lowlands, rather than up high. Making the climb up to Macchu Pichu was on your bucketlist, but not like this.

“Obviously, the more alive the guy is the better,” You said, reading about how he was wanted dead or alive. You didn’t like to hurt people unless it was necessary. “Though how he’s still alive is beyond me. Keeping companies with war criminals is a dangerous business.”

“They’re just using him until he has nothing more to give. Then they’ll kill him. Hardly seems worth saving.”

“Everyone deserves a second chance, Maria,” You said, avoiding looking at her. Instead, you kept your eyes on the tablet, opening up the map to see how far it was to your destination. She would know what you meant. She knew why you kept yourself emotionally unavailable despite the strong feelings between the two of you. She knew why you wore the gloves at all times. Because as long as you were safe, you were worth the second chance that SHIELD had given you.

“Not everyone,” She stated. She pressed her foot down on the gas pedal and the Jeep roared in response, speeding you to your destination. You bit down on your lip, seeing the yellow in your gloves glow all the brighter.

-

With searing red hands, the gloves having burnt off by now, you pushed Maria out of the path of the falling ceiling. You were beyond the thought of hurting her, just making sure that she didn’t get killed was enough for you right now. It was getting harder to breathe, even to you, so it must have been nearly impossible for her.

A lot of people talk about the way that fire feels, how the warmth surrounds and it suffocates. They never talk about the way that it smells. It wasn’t pleasant, like a campfire, though a lot of wood was burning around them right now. The Cabana paradise that the traitor had fled to had a lot of wooden insides, but brick walls with insulation inside, for hurricanes were popular in this region. The smell of burnt plastic, of hair burning on exposed skin, it was heavy, and overbearing.

Maria coughed as she got back up from where you had pushed her, but didn’t hesitate for a moment to ask what you were doing. She knew you. She knew that you loved her, and that you would do nothing to harm her on purpose. As the ceiling fell down behind her, you managed to burn it into ash, causing it to look like a black snow that landed on your shoulders. Your hands were pure white, like the hottest flames, for that was what was coming out of them. You could destroy the whole building if you had wanted to, but that was not your intention coming into this house.

When you arrived a half hour earlier, you played dumb. Just two girls who were out and about on a beach vacation. The guy, seeing right through it, invited you in nonetheless. He couldn’t help but take his chances to brag about getting away with everything, about how he knew that you were coming for him, about how he was going to make you regret coming here.

You exchanged looks with Maria. Men and their bragging monologues. You were anticipating this, counting on it in fact. You played scared as he tied you down to a chair, though you could easily burn through the ropes. Maria did the same, but stated that she was going to report him to Nick Fury, and oh boy, would he be in trouble then. The perp laughed right in her face. “Oh, you won’t be talking to Fury ever again,” He gloated.

The plan was to wait until he made a further move. Let him implicate himself even further. The speaker inside of your hoodie was recording everything. It would be played at his trial and he’d get sentenced to life in a dirty prison.

But then something happened that got rid of the plan entirely. A knock on the door. Neither you, nor Maria, were expecting any sort of backup since this was meant to be an easy but important job. You looked at one another again, not with annoyance, but with confusion.

“I’ll be right back, don’t you move,” The perp said, then laughed as if he thought that it was funny. He turned his back on you, which was never a good idea. And considering that you were off of the beaten path, it was a bad idea for him to get the door since it seemed unlikely to be a pizza deliveryman.

You thought of something infuriating. You thought about how you were never going to be able to touch, or to kiss Maria, in the way that you wanted, all because of these stupid powers. And that caused enough heat for you to be able to burn through the ropes, and get to your feet in the stealthiest way that SHIELD had taught you. You hid behind the wall, peering out towards the front door where the perp stood, unlocking it, then opening it.  

He was greeted with a bullet to the head.

It was an unexpected sound, and made you jump, which of course, triggered your powers. You began to feel your hand growing warm, and your glove was nearly burned off by the time the body hit the floor. You held your hand out to shoot fire at the gunman, but hit the wooden door instead, which started to burn. “Shit!” You swore, looking back to see Maria escape from her own constraints and get to her feet, pulling her gun out. “Come on, let’s find a back way out, we might be able to catch him still.”

Maria nodded, then turned to go through the kitchen to see if there was a back way. She then returned then shook her head. You really fucked this one up, since the flames were spreading towards the cheap curtains. Everything would be going up in smoke within a few minutes. Given the wooden and polyester furniture, you would guess you had maybe ten minutes.

You went over to the body, ignoring the heat of the door. You could handle it without getting burned. It was all a part of your ‘gift’, or mutation as you called it. The shot was perfect, right through the forehead. The victim didn’t even have the chance to be surprised. He died with a smile on his face. You took a picture with your phone, which sent it right to SHIELD, then called in a potential SOS. It meant that someone would be keeping an eye on your situation, and send in help if necessary. It was starting to seem necessary.

Maria was kicking at one of the windows in the living room, but it was screwed shut, and the glass wasn’t cracking. “So they spend the money on bulletproof glass, but nothing else?” She complained, pushing her hair out of her face once more. If it wasn’t such a dangerous situation, it would be hot. But pay attention to the task. The door was a pillar of fire, going up to the ceiling. It was starting to spread up there, with it warping. Smoke was coming out in plumes. If you didn’t do something soon, you were going to die in here. You sent out the SOS.

Maria came to your side, and crouched down where the air wasn’t as smoke filled, and you joined her. It was then that you looked up and heard the cracking of the ceiling. That was when you used your bare hands to push Maria out of the way. She sprawled on the ground, looked at you in surprise, then got up, slowly.

“Thanks,” She said, then started to cough as the smoke affected her. “We’re going to have to try to go through the doorway, there’s no other way.”

You nodded, knowing that she was right, as scary as it was. And you knew that there was only going to be one way that you were both going to get out of here alive. So you started to do it without thinking or worrying about how Maria was going to react.

Bare hands were the only option that you had. You grabbed onto her wrist, pulled her against your chest, and made yourself as big as you possibly could be by spreading out your arms. By doing this, and pushing her forward with your body, you went through the flaming doorway and out into the fresh air, taking all of the damage from the fire around you. It burnt through your clothes, and affected your skin, though you couldn’t feel it much. You still had the potential of infections though, and it was a huge risk.

You rolled onto the ground after getting out, doing the old ‘stop, drop, and roll’ technique that you learned in elementary school. Maria was beside you, slapping out some of the leftover flames. Now that - that, you could feel.

Something flew over head, spilling gallons of water over the fire that you had started. The fire that put you and more importantly, Maria in danger. You sat up after being sure that you were no longer on fire, with tears in your eyes. You fucked this up completely. The killer was who-knows-where and you had no clues. You hadn’t even been able to see a face. If you had aimed properly, if you had gone for your gun instead of a fireball, you might have caught him. You pulled your knees up against your chest and rested your head on them in a fetal position, trying not to fully cry out of frustration.

“It’s okay,” Maria said in a voice that she very rarely used. One of comfort. One of compassion. You looked at her out of the corner of your eye and saw that she was holding a hand over her arm. Right where you had pushed her to get her out of the way of the falling ceiling.

“Did I hurt you?” You asked, feeling the guilt shower over you once more. You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself if you marked her like this.

“It’s nothing. I’m more worried about you,” She said, circling around you to take in the extent of the damage. “It’s not so bad. You won’t need skin grafts.”

“Thank Thor for that, I don’t want to go through that again,” You mumbled. “I showed you mine, now show me yours.”

Maria stared at you, hard enough for you to feel like she was cutting through you like a damn boulder. She clearly didn’t want to move her hand away, but she did slowly. You could see the imprint of your hand seared against her skin. “Oh shit. Oh fuck, Maria, I’m so sorry-”

“Don’t apologize,” She said, sharply. “You saved my life in there. This is just a scar that proves your love to me.”

Your breath caught in your throat. You knew that she knew about your feelings, and that you would do anything to save  her, hence why Fury often put you on missions together. “It sounds abusive when you put it that way.”

“It’s not.” Maria said. The heavy noise of a rotating propeller took over the calm landscape, as a helicopter hovered nearby, touching down to send out the medics and other officers. You didn’t have a chance to talk to Maria alone, since you were both rushed in and had to sit down to let the doctors take a look at your burns. You couldn’t stop watching her as she revealed the burn not only on her upper arm where you had pushed her, but on her wrist where you had grabbed her. Two perfect hand-shaped burns, on her forever.

She didn’t avoid looking at you. As soon as you were both cleared for flight to be taken back to SHIELD headquarters for further assessment, she sat beside you, strapped in tight to the seat. “Do not feel guilty,” She ordered.

“That’s not something you can just command someone to do,” You retorted back, hiding your hands in the pocket of your sweater. Somehow, it had retained enough fabric to stay on, though most of the back was destroyed. It was a shame, this was a nice sweater, bought for you by the much-loved Coulson.

“Well, I’m commanding it anyway. As your superior officer, I am ordering you to not feel guilty, because by doing this small amount of damage, you saved me. There was no other way. I will be putting that in my report.”

Professional as always. You rolled your eyes, then leaned back against the seat. You were heavily bandaged by the medics so as not to bother the burns until they could be looked at in a more sterile environment. “Now do you understand why we can’t be together?” You asked, just loud enough for Maria to hear.

“No,” She said, staring straight ahead. “I can handle a few burns, y/l/n. Can you?”

It was enough to make you think on the ride back to base. You couldn’t handle the thought of hurting her, you were barely coping with the reality of it all. But Maria remained as cool and as calm as ever.

You were having second thoughts about denying her now; perhaps her strength was beginning to rub off on you.

[bittercoldbrew]

Well, geeze, this got outta hand... I blame @silverwolf319​ for being so kind and encouraging and joining me in the little spoon!Ezra club even though he’s technically a big spoon in this one, but I think it still qualifies. Thank you, darling 💕

In theory this is a follow-up to my earlier Ezra/OC oneshot (which is, in theory, a follow-up to my finished story, To Build Something New), but I think they can be read independently, or in any order you please. Here we’ve got about 5k words of just the softest fluff I think I’ve ever written, Cee and Ezra and his unnamed partner with she/her pronouns, building a blanket fort together when the rain keeps them all up at night. This briefly gets a teensy bit saucier than the other one did, so I’m asking to keep this one 18+ only, please and thanks, friends. No other warnings, just an absurd amount of established relationship sweetness here. Enjoy!

Most nights, she loves the skylight above their bed, loves the view of the vast and glorious expanse of space beyond the meager atmosphere of this dwarf planet that has become so dear to her—loves, too, the occasional brush of willowy branches against the glass from the big tree outside, when the wind is up. After so very many years spent floating through the galaxy aboard slingbacks and freighters, she needs this glimpse of the heavens just as much as she needs the reminder of the solid ground beneath her feet. Even now, more than two years spent as a resident of Aphelia, she still has horrid dreams of hull breaches and micrometeoroids and hairline cracks, and often it helps to wake and watch for lazy clouds drifting by or those familiar leaves or the rare nightbird, proof that there is a sky here, hugging her close to the crust of the planet she’s made her own and promising to never let her be sucked out into the void.

Tonight, however, and the storm it has brought, offer far more proof than she would ever need. The wind howls; branches thrash and snap into the air; rain pelts harsh rhythms against the glass; and the sky is so full up with clouds that she can’t find a single soothing glimmer of any stars beyond.

The man in bed beside her, with his steady breaths and radiant warmth, the gentle weight of his arm across her belly, should be more than comfort enough. Ezra is not often an easy sleeper, but he can be a deep one under the right circumstances, and if she were a sensible woman she'd cuddle up against his chest and let the sweet thrumming of his tender heart lull her back to sleep.

She puts on a good show, she'll admit; but she is not often as sensible as people seem to believe.

Feeling guilty, yet restless, she creeps out from under his loose hold and to the edge of the bed. Light flashes overhead, followed closely by a deep groan of thunder, and she freezes halfway to her feet and glances over her shoulder to make sure it hasn’t woken him. But no, his eyes are still closed, those pretty dark lashes fanned against his cheeks, though a slight frown now creases his brow. He buries his face deeper into the pillow with a soft grumble, and she releases her held breath and stands and creeps around the bed and out into the hall—taking one of the spare blankets with her, of course.

She has some vague thoughts of decaffeinated tea and chocolate bars, maybe a dip into that carton of ripe berries in the refrigeration unit if Ezra hasn’t eaten them all by now, but her weary feet can’t seem to carry her that long way to the kitchen and she all but collapses onto the couch, instead. Ridiculous, she thinks, that she can feel this exhausted and this wired simultaneously. There’s been a stomach bug getting passed around at work, one she’s somehow managed to dodge thus far—both a blessing and a curse, because it’s meant that she’s been picking up extra shifts left and right. Tomorrow—technically today, she confirms after a quick glance at the time—is supposed to be her first day off in a tenday and a half, and she’s been so looking forward to finally having time to unwind and spend with her little family. Given the way her pulse keeps jumping with every crash of lightning and rattle of windows, she’s going to spend the day catching up on lost sleep, instead.

Cursing herself, her anxiety, and the weather—not necessarily in that order—she curls up against the arm of the couch and tucks the blanket under her chin, contents herself to a night spent merely hoping for sleep to come.

The storm is...beautiful, she has to admit, viewed through the front room’s wide windows. Dark as it is, there’s enough sheet lightning to paint the sky in grayish purples and greens, and the ribbons of rain seem to dance in the wind. They do have a DTV in here, but the signal isn’t great even on the clearest of days, and the serials streaming in the overnight public blocks are nothing but trash. The storm, for all its insolence, is likely to be far more entertaining.

She loses track of how long she sits there, knees pulled up to her chest, head resting against the back of the couch, until she hears the low rasp of her name and turns to find Ezra shuffling into the room. His hair is mussed, his chest bare, patched and tattered sleep pants riding tantalizingly low on lean hips; but his eyes are only half-open, hand and attention occupied as he hitches his prosthesis up over the liner that insulates his limb remnant, and seals it into place. There’s a soft hiss, and then a gentle whirr as the delicate machinery twitches synthetic finger and wrist and elbow joints, cycling through its startup flexibility test.

While it’s busy, Ezra rests his left arm on the back of the couch, and leans over to place a slow and sleepy kiss to her lips. “Hey, you,” he sighs.

“Hey, you,” she answers, mouth spreading up into a smile as she lifts a hand to smooth along his jaw. “I’m sorry; did I wake you?”

“Nah, the storm did,” he tells her, and though he’s not the sort of man to lie to her, she’s not entirely sure she believes him. “Mind if I sit with you a while?”

“I’d love that.” Kevva only knows why they’re whispering, with the storm crashing so loudly around them, but it feels right, here in the dark—especially when he comes around and settles in close beside her. She unwinds the blanket and drapes it over them both, and he wraps his arms around her and pulls her into his warmth. He smells a bit like derma-cream, but she’s grown so accustomed to the tangy blend of menthol and citrus that it mostly just smells like home, and she all but melts into him.

“How long you been awake, starlight?” he asks, keeping his voice low and gentle, and she sighs and shakes her head.

“Never fell asleep in the first place. I got up, oh...” She lifts her gaze, checking the time that floats into view, courtesy of her optical implant. “An hour ago, maybe?”

He squeezes her tight, and she can hear the frown in his voice as he asks, “Why didn’t you wake me?”

She kisses his shoulder—there’s a little cream there, too, and it makes her lips tingle for a brief moment. “You were sleeping so soundly, I didn’t wanna interrupt.”

He huffs, dipping his head to meet her eyes. “You know you’re more important, babygirl. Besides...” he trails off, lifting an unsubtle eyebrow, “you know how much I love sendin’ you to sleep.”

She snorts a laugh, shakes her head. “You’re a selfless man.”

“I’m just eager to help,” he says, grinning, and she laughs again.

“You’re eager for something, I’ll grant you that.” The grin broadens, his cheek dimpling, and she considers the offer. It’s tempting, that’s for sure—she’s been working so much, hasn’t had much time or energy to indulge in the pleasure he’s always so willing to give her. She’s missed him, missed the sweet words that fall from his lips as he comes undone for her, missed the way he fills her just right, as though his body was made for hers, and hers for his.

But the idea of just the walk from the couch to the bedroom seems a little insurmountable right now, even for such a delectable reward. She doesn’t think her body can get any more exhausted than it already is, with or without his best efforts, and sleep hasn’t blessed her yet; and he’d put his arm on which means he’d expected to be awake for a while, hadn’t really planned on taking her back to bed so soon. With a sigh, she tucks her face into the crook of his neck, and shakes her head softly. “Thank you...but I think I’d just like to listen to the rain a little longer.”

He nods, hugging her close and resting his cheek against her hair. “That sounds just fine to me.”

Ezra gives her so many reasons to love him, and this is no exception—how willing he is to set aside his own desires for hers, how he always seems to know when she wants to be wooed and persuaded into bed versus when she just wants to be close to him without interference, even of the pleasurable kind.

She’s never been as skilled with words as he is, has no idea how to really verbalize such a feeling, but she breathes against his neck, “I love you so much, Ez,” and hopes it might suffice, for now.

He rubs her back, presses a kiss to the top of her head, murmurs, “I love you too, baby,” into her hair, his soft voice full of so much tenderness that she thinks he understands everything she’s ever left unsaid.

A boom of thunder splits the night, so close it seems to happen before the blinding flash, and they both jump. Ezra pulls away, squeezes her shoulder. “I’m gonna...go check that out,” he tells her, and she nods as he heaves himself to his feet and crosses the room to peer through the window.

She twists around to try and watch as he moves away from the glass and heads into the kitchen, beyond her view. An instant later, she hears the back door slide open, a strong draft and sharp whistle of wind blowing into the house before it closes again. “Ezra?” she calls, but there’s no response, so she assumes he’s gone outside to investigate, and waits with bated breath for him to return.

A minute later, he does, with another rush of wind; then he comes striding back around the corner, rubbing at his wet hair with a dish towel and looking far more awake and alert than he had before. “Looks like there’s a tree down in the back,” he announces, shaking his head. “Not one of ours, though, and I didn’t see a lick of flame. Too wet out there, I reckon.”

She puffs out a breath, and nods her head. “That’s a relief.”

“Mm-hm,” he agrees, dragging the towel over his face and down his neck and across his broad, glistening chest. Her hands suddenly itch to grab the towel from him and finish the job herself (possibly with her tongue, perhaps, fuck the towel, why do they even have towels?), the sight of him enough to cause her mind and libido to make a stark course correction from where she’d just said she wanted this night to lead, and she opens her mouth to make those intentions clear.

Before she can, another voice speaks up. “Did you guys hear that?”

Twisting back the other way, she turns and spots Cee stepping into the room, one hand rubbing at her tired eyes, the other holding her beloved plush Puzu doll against her stomach. “Aww, not you, too,” she calls, propping her chin on the back of the couch and offering the girl a sympathetic smile.

“We didn’t wake you, did we, little bird?” Ezra asks, slinging the towel over his shoulder with a sheepish expression on his face.

“Pretty sure it was the sky exploding that did it,” the teenager says dryly, shaking her head. “Planets are weird.”

“They are indeed,” he agrees, glancing from his daughter to his partner with a broad grin. Of the three of them, she is the de facto expert on planets, having resided on one for the longest and most recent stretch of time—but that was almost twenty years ago, now, so she isn’t entirely convinced it should count.

Shaking her head, she hauls herself up off the couch and stretches her arms up above her head, feeling something pop along her spine. “Well,” she sighs, turning to face them with her hands on her hips. “Why don’t I make us some cocoa, then, before we lose power or something?”

They both seem thrilled by the prospect, and she makes her way into the kitchen with a smile, taking only a slight detour to trail her fingers along the cooled, damp skin of Ezra’s back as she passes him by. There will be opportunity enough, later, for her hands to have their fill of him. They might all end up sleeping the day away after this storm finally passes, so for now she’s going to make the most of this time to spend with them.

Her hot chocolate recipe, perfected over the course of many years of sleepless nights, has become something of a ritual now that she has these two beloved people to make it for; she falls into it without conscious thought, toasting cardamom pods and a cinnamon stick in the saucepan before adding milk, then chopping up a bar of the good chocolate to stir in once it’s warm enough. The storm still rages loudly, and she can only just make out the cadence and timbre of Cee’s and Ezra’s voices as they discuss something in the other room, and she lets the sounds wash over her as she grabs a foil-wrapped parcel of popcorn and sets it on the other burner to pop, marveling at how surreal yet mundane it feels, to have a family—something she’d never even dreamed of for herself, before she met these two.

She’s poking around in the pantry, checking to see if there are any other tasty treats to munch on, when the sound of heavy furniture creaking along the floor—and their resulting laughter—reaches her ears and makes her question all those warm and fuzzy feelings. She leans back, trying to catch sight of what’s going on over there, and calls, “What’re you two up to?”

“Nothin’!” Ezra answers, far too quickly for her comfort, and she frowns and takes a step that way.

But then Cee calls back, “It’s a surprise! No peeking!”

“Fine! Fine,” she mutters, shaking her head but turning back. She’s pretty sure, now, what they’re doing, but resolves not to interfere in the creative process unless they ask for it.

Besides, she has snacks to prepare.

She whips up a few peanut butter sandwiches, crusts on and sliced into triangles, in case anyone’s really hungry—they’ll make for a quick lunch tomorrow, if not—and grabs the last few handfuls of berries out of the fridge as well. Tossing one into her mouth, the sweet, sharp juice bursts along her tongue as she dumps the popcorn into a big bowl and pointedly ignores the sounds of bedroom doors opening and something heavy being dragged down the hall. She fills the kettle with water and heats that, too, just in case they do lose power tonight and someone decides they want tea or something before it comes back; with a couple towels draped on top, it should stay warm enough until morning.

The milk is ready, so she scoops out the spices and whisks in the chocolate and ladles up three mugs, then arranges them and all the food into one of the fruit crates Ez brings home from Kikur, and calls, “Can I come in yet?”

“Just—hang on a tick,” he grunts, and she can hear a bit of scuffling. Then, Cee’s voice, “Okay, it’s ready!”

Already smiling, she hefts up the crate and heads over to see what they’ve made of the front room.

The coffee table has disappeared entirely; the couch has been moved back against the wall, its seats and pillows removed to serve as cushions atop Cee’s mattress, relocated from her bedroom to the floor. The floor lamp was taken from its usual corner to stand at the foot of the mattress, and two big bedsheets have been clothespinned together and draped over its lampshade and tucked behind the back of the couch, forming a canopy to cover their heads while still giving them a view of the windows and the rain beyond.

Ezra has changed into a dry pair of sweatpants and one of the soft sweaters she tends to steal from his wardrobe when he’s away. He clicks on the lamp, bathing the space inside in a warm, cloth-dampened glow; then he takes a step back and surveys their work with his hands on his hips and a serious expression, as though it were something far more architecturally complex than a cozy blanket fort. “You know, I think this is our best one yet.”

She sets the crate down gently, careful not to spill anything, and crosses her arms with an appraising air. “You know, I think you might be right...” she says, nodding her head slowly. “We better get in it, just to be sure.”

Laughing, Cee tosses her stuffed animal inside and clambers in first. She follows after the girl, settling in among the soft cushions and warm blankets with a sigh, amazed at how well the lightweight sheets muffle the harsh noise of the raging storm.

Ezra doesn’t join them just yet, instead crouching down to investigate the contents of the crate. “What is all this, starlight?” he asks, lifting up and passing over the mugs of chocolate and bowl of popcorn. “You made us a feast.”

“Just some snacks, to tide us over. Hey, no, you give that to us,” she reprimands, seeing him prying open the carton of berries. “Don’t even think about it.”

The man is a berry-eating fiend, just inhales the things like some sort of confused anteater gone frugivore. If she takes her eyes off him for one second with that carton in his possession, they’ll all be gone before she and Cee ever get a chance.

Even with her staring him down, he pops three into his mouth at once; but then he does, begrudgingly, hand the rest over, so she allows this transgression and snatches them up and passes the carton into Cee’s hands for safekeeping.

“You’re so mean to me,” he grumbles, even as he rests the plate of sandwiches she made on top of the mattress and stuffs one wedge into his mouth, finally moving past the lamp and under the canopy to settle against the cushions beside her.

“You need to learn how to share,” she scolds, taking the bitten-off piece of sandwich from his mouth and biting into it herself.

“Ew, no,” Cee groans. “If you two are gonna be gross, you’ll be banished from the fort.”

"Sorry, boss," she tells her, genuinely chastened.

Ezra nods his head, settling his expression into something solemn. "She's harsh, but fair."

Then, in a flash, he snatches back the last corner of bread and peanut butter and shoves it in his mouth, shattering the moment and sending them all into fits of laughter, too giddy from the lateness of the hour and the lack of sleep and the spontaneity of finding themselves all huddled together like this to ever be able (or willing) to reign in their shared mirth.

They giggle and tease each other and snack, mouths going sticky with peanut butter and chocolate, fingertips smeared with butter and salt and berry juice, even as the wind howls and the rain beats down on the roof. Here, under their makeshift tent, the three of them are warm and content and safe, and she doesn’t think she’s ever been so happy to have found herself unable to fall asleep.

Cee is not often very physically affectionate, but she turns into a real cuddlebug when tired, and tonight is no exception. The older woman wraps her arms around the teenager’s shoulders and hugs her close, the Puzu plush tucked between them.

Beside her, Ezra tosses the last of the berries into his mouth and heaves a slow, satisfied sigh. “Did I ever tell you two about the time I met a ghost? Was a night just like this one.”

The girls look at each other, sharing matching dubious glances. “No, you haven’t,” Cee says, voice dry as bone. “And no, you definitely didn’t.”

“Swear it on my good arm!” he proclaims, laying his prosthetic hand over his heart, and it is utterly impossible to tell if the expression on his face is genuine or not. “Even know whose specter it was; I described his face to my crew after they found me, and one of the old timers said, ‘Why, that was Long Richard Johnson!’”

His captive audience squawk similar, wordless sounds of protest—she’s certain there’s never been such a man with such a name, let alone a spirit of the same.

But Ezra’s eyebrows shoot up with surprise, and he pushes himself up on his elbows to gape at them. “What? You never heard the legend of Ol’ Long Dick?”

“Stop,” Cee groans, tossing a handful of popcorn at his face, but he shakes his head, a grin spreading across his face as he really starts to delve into the role of storyteller.

“No, no, I’m not— This is not just a me thing, this an honest-to-Kevva prospector’s legend. He was one of the greats, the first independent contractor to ever set foot on the Green.”

“Uh-huh,” she says, still disbelieving, but resting her cheek atop Cee’s head to listen. With or without any kernel of truth, this is bound to be an interesting tale, at least.

“I mean it! He was the first to reject allegiance to any of the corps; and they let ‘im, too, because no one else, before or since, could suss out those gems like he could. He was a master of the Green Moon; they say he was the first to locate the Queen’s Lair, but he refused to mark it on any map or tell anyone where it was, knew the corps were too greedy and bloodthirsty to ever be trusted with such knowledge. They say he hired a private ship to sneak him out there without their purview, determined to harvest it all his own self, but there was some engine trouble and he never did make it. They say he’s buried up at the top of the Green’s highest peak, with a headstone that reads, ‘Here lies Long Dick Johnson, who earned every inch of his name’.”

“You’re a menace,” she gasps, pelting him with more popcorn, because she’d almost started believing him until that last bit.

But he only laughs and shakes his head, plucking popcorn out of his own hair and tossing it in his mouth. “I’m only relaying what I myself have been told, any deviations from the truth are someone else’s doing.”

“And this ‘ghost’ you saw?” Cee asks, making exaggerated air quotes with a skeptical look on her face.

“Ah, now, that is my tale to tell.” He leans in and props his chin in his hand, voice lowering to a whisper as he begins, “It was a night just like this one...”

He weaves a tapestry with his words, painting a picture for them of himself as a (somewhat) fresher-faced kip, new to the moon above Bakhroma, having contracted out his able body and his rundown ship to a crew of grizzled prospectors, in exchange for training on how to harvest the dazzling gems and a reasonable cut of their earnings. All had gone accordingly, until they found themselves caught in one of the moon’s rare, but devastating, rainstorms, and had to stay cooped up inside the ship, unable to harvest and unable to relocate lest the ship get struck by lightning midair and leave them stranded there permanently. So instead he spent his days learning complicated board games with made-up rules using bits and pieces of supplies they had lying around, letting his ears be filled with raucous stories of days and prospectors gone by.

And then, late one night, he’d been shaken awake by a man he’d thought to be one of the crew, dragged from his bunk and shuffled into his suit and helmet and filter and pack. He’d only briefly tried to hesitate, to wake the others, but the man had grabbed him and growled, “There’s no time, boy—move, or you’ll miss it.” So, only half awake and unable to think straight, he’d obeyed without question and followed him out the airlock.

He had stumbled in the dark, in the mud, in the rain and wind, still relatively new to this and unaccustomed to the bulky suit, and by the time he realized that the only reason he could follow at all was because the man leading him was glowing—luminous and stark and visible even through the sheeting rain and dust and muck that clouded his helmet—they were too far from the ship for him to ever have any hope of making it back on his own. He’d had no choice but to plod along after the ghost, for hours, maybe, until finally the figure stopped and pointed at his feet and commanded, “Dig.”

And then, without a whole lotta options otherwise, he had obeyed.

Eventually, the storm passed, and the light dawned, and his crew must’ve noticed his empty bunk and followed the single track of stumbling footprints until they found him where he’d fallen asleep in the shallow gouge he’d carved in the dirt, still clutching his shovel.

They accused him of sleepwalking, of cabin fever, of dipping into the good hooch behind their backs—all without malice, really, but certainly refusing to believe any claim of spectral visions. At least, that was, until one of the men looked down, and realized that the thing at his feet wasn’t, in fact, a large clump of dirt, but an aurelac root nodule the size of a small child.

“To this day, that was my finest single harvest,” he admits, shaking his head slowly. “The crew gave me a heartier cut than promised, and still all had enough to retire off of. Not me, though; from that day on, I was hooked. Sunk my savings in a newer ship and sought out another crew and kept goin’ back, always hoping to see him again, to pull another fabled haul.”

She nods her head, unsure of what she could possibly have to say to that, but she can so vividly imagine how such an experience would inspire a man like him, would spur him on to the sort of life he’s led. So she says nothing, simply lays a hand against his cheek, letting the edge of her thumb rest in the dimple that creases his cheek as he blinks and tears his gaze away from the past to smile at her instead.

He turns his head, presses his lips to her palm with a sweet kiss, and nods toward the teenager resting against her shoulder. “How long’s she been out?”

“Hm?” she asks, surprised, and looks down to find that he’s right, that the girl’s eyes are firmly closed, her chest rising and falling with deep, steady breaths. “Oh,” she whispers, scared to wake her, “I didn’t even notice.”

His breathy laugh is quiet, a chuckle kept mostly inside his chest, and he nods his head and says, “Let’s not wake her. She can sleep out here, don’t you think?”

“I—” she tries, but the words are stifled by a deep yawn that causes tears to prick at the corners of her eyes; she brushes them away, offers him a sheepish smile. “I think I might join her.”

His grin is brilliant as he nods again, leans in for a quick kiss, then pulls back and starts gathering up the empty mugs and half-eaten popcorn and sandwiches. “How about we all stay, hm? I’ll put these away.”

“Here, I can help—” she starts, but he catches her reaching hand in his and shakes his head.

“I got it, baby. You stay here with her, yeah? I’ll be back soon.”

She nods, rubbing at her eye again, the exhaustion of the past two weeks finally catching up with her. “You promise?”

Ezra kisses her again, warm, soft lips lingering in a way that steals her breath away, leaves her lightheaded and a little dazed when he pulls back and whispers, “I promise.”

She settles deeper into the cushions as he quietly gathers up the dishes and food and the few errant popcorn kernels they’d thrown at him, and slips out from the blanket fort. It’s immediately colder in there without his warmth, emptier without his familiar weight beside her, and she hugs Cee a little tighter as she listens to the fridge opening and closing, the faucet turning on and off, his footsteps drawing near then moving past and away down the hall to the bedroom. Above it all, the sound of the rain against the roof has settled into a steadier, gentler thrum, the booming thunder and frightful wind moving on to rattle someone else’s windows.

When Ezra returns, clicking off the lamp and crawling under the canopy to slide in beside her, he has removed his prosthetic arm—never fond of sleeping with it on—and brought the heavy quilt from atop their bed along with him. She helps him spread it out over all three of them, making sure Cee is tucked in snug while he settles in and wraps his arm around her waist.

He rests his chin on her available shoulder, his whispered words a warm brush of breath on her skin as he asks, “What’d you think of my story?”

“I think it was...effective at making us all sleepy.”

He huffs a laugh, rubs his nose against her cheek. “Alright, sure, but did you believe it?”

She grins in the dark, even though she knows he can’t see it. “I believe that you believe it,” she allows.

His lips, pressing against her skin, curl up into a smile, and the warmth of it works its way deep into her heart and radiates from there to the top of her head and the tips of her toes. His hand slips beneath her shirt, palm spreading along her belly—not teasing, not suggesting anything more than a blatant desire to touch as much of her as he can. “That’s more than enough for me,” he sighs, achingly content.

She nods her head in agreement; and in these last few instants of consciousness before sleep finally claims her, she thinks that this moment, snuggled close between the two best people in the known universe, safe and warm from any storm, is more than enough for her, too.

[sparklytastemakerwitch]

The ancient fabric that no one knows how to make

In late 18th-Century Europe, a new fashion led to an international scandal. In fact, an entire social class was accused of appearing in public naked.

The culprit was Dhaka muslin, a precious fabric imported from the city of the same name in what is now Bangladesh, then in Bengal. It was not like the muslin of today. Made via an elaborate, 16-step process with a rare cotton that only grew along the banks of the holy Meghna river, the cloth was considered one of the great treasures of the age. It had a truly global patronage, stretching back thousands of years – deemed worthy of clothing statues of goddesses in ancient Greece, countless emperors from distant lands, and generations of local Mughal royalty.

There were many different types, but the finest were honoured with evocative names conjured up by imperial poets, such as "baft-hawa", literally "woven air". These high-end muslins were said to be as light and soft as the wind. According to one traveller, they were so fluid you could pull a bolt – a length of 300ft, or 91m – through the centre of a ring. Another wrote that you could fit a piece of 60ft, or 18m, into a pocket snuff box.

Dhaka muslin was also more than a little transparent.

While traditionally, these premium fabrics were used to make saris and jamas �� tunic-like garments worn by men – in the UK they transformed the style of the aristocracy, extinguishing the highly structured dresses of the Georgian era. Five-foot horizontal waistlines that could barely fit through doorways were out, and delicate, straight-up-and-down "chemise gowns" were in. Not only were these endowed with a racy gauzy quality, they were in the style of what was previously considered underwear.

In one popular satirical print by Isaac Cruikshank, a clique of women appear together in long, brightly coloured muslin dresses, through which you can clearly see their bottoms, nipples and pubic hair. Underneath reads the description, "Parisian Ladies in their Winter Dress for 1800".

Meanwhile in an equally misogynistic comedic excerpt from an English women's monthly magazine, a tailor helps a female client to achieve the latest fashion. "Madame, ’tis done in a moment," he assures her, then instructs her to remove her petticoat, then her pockets, then her corset and finally her sleeves… "‘Tis an easy matter, you see," he explains. "To be dressed in the fashion, you have only to undress."

Still, Dhaka muslin was a hit – with those who could afford it. It was the most expensive fabric of the era, with a retinue of dedicated fans that included the French queen Marie Antoinette, the French empress Joséphine Bonaparte and Jane Austen. But as quickly as this wonder-cloth struck Enlightenment Europe, it vanished.

By the early 20th Century, Dhaka muslin had disappeared from every corner of the globe, with the only surviving examples stashed safely in valuable private collections and museums. The convoluted technique for making it was forgotten, and the only type of cotton that could be used, Gossypium arboreum var. neglecta – locally known as Phuti karpas – abruptly went extinct. How did this happen? And could it be reversed?

A fickle fibre

Dhaka muslin began with plants grown along the banks of the Meghna river, one of three which form the immense Ganges Delta – the largest in the world. Every spring, their maple-like leaves pushed up through the grey, silty soil, and made their journey towards straggly adulthood. Once fully grown, they produced a single daffodil-yellow flower twice a year, which gave way to a snowy floret of cotton fibres.

These were no ordinary fibres. Unlike the long, slender strands produced by its Central American cousin Gossypium hirsutum, which makes up 90% of the world’s cotton today, Phuti karpas produced threads that are stumpy and easily frayed. This might sound like a flaw, but it depends what you’re planning to do with them.

Indeed, the short fibres of the vanished shrub were useless for making cheap cotton cloth using industrial machinery. They were fickle to work with, and they’d snap easily if you tried to twist them into yarn this way. Instead, the local people tamed the rogue threads with a series of ingenious techniques developed over millennia.

What is flannel fabric?

Essentially, flannel fabric simply refers to any cotton, wool, or synthetic fabric that fulfills a few basic criteria:

Softness: Fabric must be incredibly soft to be considered flannel.

Texture: Flannel has either a brushed or unbrushed texture, and both textures are equally iconic.

Material: While many materials can be used to make flannel, not all materials are suitable for this fabric. Silk, for instance, is too fine to be made into flannel, which is supposed to be both soft and insulative.

Flannel in history

It’s believed that the word“flannel” emerged in Wales, but we know for a fact that the term was in common usage in France in the form “flannelle” as early as the 17th century. While flannel was periodically popular among the French and other European peoples throughout the Enlightenment era, interest has waned elsewhere while Welsh flannel use has only increased.

Flannel today

These days, types of flannel are often known by their association with certain Welsh towns or regions. Llanidloes flannel is very different from Newtown flannel, for instance, and Welsh flannel varieties vary significantly from all other European flannel types.

Blanket

Sheet, usually of heavy woolen, or partly woolen, cloth, for use as a shawl, bed covering, or horse covering. The blanketmaking of primitive people is one of the finest remaining examples of early domestic artwork. The blankets of Mysore, India, were famous for their fine, soft texture. The loom of the Native American, though simple in construction, can produce blanket so closely woven as to be waterproof. The Navaho, Zu?i, Hopi, and other Southwestern Native Americans are noted for their distinctive, firmly woven blankets. The Navahos produced beautifully designed blankets characterized by geometrical designs woven with yarns colored with vegetable dyes. During the mid-19th cent. the Navahos began to use yarns imported from Europe, because of their brighter colors. The ceremonial Chilcat blanket of the Tlingit of the Northwest, generally woven with a warp of cedar bark and wool and a weft of goats' hair, was curved and fringed at the lower end. In the 20th cent., the electric blanket, with electric wiring between layers of fabric, gained wide popularity.

How to Properly Use a Bath Mat

Whether you’ve just remodeled your bathroom or you’re looking to spruce up your existing space for the season, accessories like a handsome bath mat, perfectly patterned shower curtains, or the plushest of bath towels will take the room from everyday necessity to serene spa destination. While just as important as the others, the lowly bath mat can get overlooked. But don’t make the mistake of opting for the first white terrycloth style you see. The right bath rug won’t just help you avoid the unpleasant shock of stepping onto bare tile after a shower. It will give your floor—and the whole room—an extra hit of much-needed personality. Here, we’ve gathered bath mats that are soft, absorbent, and beautifully designed. Think geometric prints, cheery stripes, even a cheeky banana-shaped option—plus many more.

First off, everyone had some great suggestions as to why we use bath mats at all. They soak up water, yes, but they also keep us from slipping and smashing our heads through the toilet, and act as a temperature buffer for our toesies between the hot shower and the ice cold floor. Gee, bath mats are pretty swell!

When it came to usage, the general consensus was that this is the wrong way to do it:

Finish shower

Step out onto mat

Grab towel

Then dry off

It leaves the bath mat soggy and wet for whoever showers after you. It also makes you much colder during the drying process.

Most people seemed to agree that this is the right way to do it, though:

Finish shower

Grab towel from inside the shower

Dry off inside the shower

Then step out onto the mat

But you all suggested a few excellent additions, like keeping your towel within arm’s reach of the shower so you don’t have to get cold to grab it, squeegeeing your hair and body to remove excess water before you dry with a towel, keeping the curtain or shower door closed while you dry off to stay warm, drying off from the top down (hair first), and hanging up the mat over the edge of the tub or shower when you’re done so it can dry without looking like a random wet towel on your floor.

What is the Difference Between Fleece and Flannel?

As you already know, the main difference between fleece and flannel is what they are made of. Fleece has synthetic fibers, and flannel features loose cotton threads. But because of their different fibers, these fabrics and finished products have several unique characteristics.

Take a look at this in-depth comparison of key features such as warmth, softness, and sustainability for each type of fabric.

Warmth

Most of the time, fleece has a thicker nap and also provides more warmth than flannel. Now, flannel is quite a cozy and warm fabric in its own right! But in comparison, fleece usually wins the warmth contest.

The exception to this rule is that some high-quality types of flannel contain wool fibers, and these types of flannel provide intense warmth!

What makes fleece so warm? Its many tiny, raised polyester fibers trap heat and hold them in the loose, velvety surface of its pile. If you have ever stuck your hand into your dog’s fur in the middle of winter, you know how all those tiny hairs hold immense warmth against your pet’s skin! Fleece fibers work the same way when you wear them against your skin.

Softness

Fleece is often softer than flannel, but if you have sensitive skin, you may find that its synthetic fibers also have a slightly plasticky feel. Of course, you will find exceptions to this rule, especially in flannel made with silk fibers. This will probably feel much softer than even the softest fleece!

Because both types of material go through a napping process, they both feature an incredibly soft texture on at least one side of the material. Fleece usually has a thicker, deeper pile, while flannel has a faint fuzziness on top of its woven surface.

If you rest your hand on top of the fleece, you feel as if your fingers can sink into the thick surface, at least a little. When you rest your hand on a piece of flannel, you typically feel a cozy fuzziness.

Blankets

Both fleece and flannel make excellent blankets and throws! You can find soft, pretty fleece and flannel blanket in pretty much any color or design you want.

That said, you should probably go with flannel for a baby blanket, as synthetic materials can sometimes cause allergic reactions.

If you plan to sew a blanket, though, you will want to use fleece. Flannel unravels super fast due to its loose weave, making it challenging to cut and sew. Fleece does not unravel when cut because it has a knitted construction with threads looped over each other.

[factual-fantasy]

20 more asks! ♡٩(●ᴗ●)۶♡

Well.. I don’t know, there’s plenty of kinds of candy that I’ve never liked.

I don’t like butterfingers, I don’t like snickers, jelly beans or most licorice.. But if I had to come out and say one specifically, I really don’t like butter fingers. The taste is fine, its the nasty texture that gets to me. ( >﹏<;)

I asked around to a few family members and got 9s and 10s out of 10. I myself think I go above and beyond to imagine and build up every little tiny detail to my stories so.. 10/10 I suppose? <:D

Hmm.. I think I’m going to put this ask into 3 category's.

1. Who likes candy corn?

U.M.Dragster

Jeepy

White Truck

Green Truck

2. Who would eat some of it if it was given to them, but would not buy it with their own money?

Brown Suburban

Beluga

Ranger

Miata

Escort

Vega

3. Doesn’t like candy corn.

Red Van

A.T.Dragster

Suburban

Honda

Unique category's. 

Volvo doesn’t eat candy and has never tried it. But he would like it if he did.

Bash Buggy also doesn’t eat candy. But if he tried it he probably wouldn’t like it too much.. He’d eat some of it if someone offered it to him though.

1. I’ve watched all the Bayverse movies and the Bumblebee movie. I liked them a lot. :}  However I am not into, nor have I seen any other adaptions other than Prime..

2. Hoo boy, here we go. XD

Suburban is a literal beast in the snow. The best of the best. The snow is no trouble at all and the cold never bothered him anyway. He may not like the snow all that much because it makes him wet and a little cold.. but he certainly doesn’t hate it and will play in it with the kids if they want him too. He also never passes up the opportunity to have a snowball fight or build a snowman.

Miata really struggles with handling the cold physically, because she’s so small, light, and rear wheel drive.. but she really does enjoy it. She likes to help the kids build giant snow men and loves making snow angels, she doesn’t mind the cold or snow at all.

Escort? Uhg. The cold isn’t enough to shut him down, but it sure darn FEELS like it. I mean sure, okay, he’s front wheel drive so actually driving in the snow and cold is fine.. buuut, if he stops moving? Its game over. He’ll start shaking and sputtering and pretty soon he’ll shut down. He does like to hang out with the kids sometimes, although normally the cold nips at him enough that he doesn’t go outside.

Brown Suburban isn’t a big fan of snow because his body struggles to start up enough already, having the cold on top of it makes it just that much harder. But honestly its not too bad. He’s heavy enough that he can drive through snow decently so that’s a plus. However, his starting up issues with snow aside, he does actually like snowball fights. One time, it was Jeepy, Wheeljack, Suburban and Bulkhead vs Brown Suburban. Brown Suburban won. The goal was to knock your opponent down. 

U.M.Dragster and his sister H A T E the cold with a burning passion... heh, burning, anyway. They just.. cant handle it at all. Like, not at all. Their joints lock up and they just shut down. One time, they both sat at the entrance of the base huddled up together and watching everyone else.. When A.T suddenly froze up and just fell over. They’re sad that they cant join everyone else. But they’re just too thin, the cold gets right under their plating and freezes their cores. <:{

Green Truck struggles with cold and snow, he really does. He’s old and has a bad shivering problem. His alt form is also a truck, meaning he’s light and doesn't get good traction in the snow and ice. Now if the kiddos want him to, he’ll go out and play with them. But otherwise he really isn’t a fan and would rather be cooped up in the base where its warm and dry.

Vega? Heck nah he don’t like the cold or snow! You kidding?? Vega is a total base hermit. Because of his age, his body really doesn't handle cold well at all, despite the size of his engine. He normally doesn’t leave the base when its cold. But in all honesty? He’s a big ol’ softie when it comes to kids. If they catch him in a decent mood he’ll go outside and endure the conditions to hang out with them.

Red Van would usually be pretty good all around when it comes to handling the cold and snow.. if it wasn't for her knees. Because of the damage they have sustained, she cant really go out in the snow all that much. The internal wiring in her knees is mostly exposed and it doesn’t react to cold well, making her sore and achy. She usually just spends her time huddled up in the base with heated straps wrapped around her legs.. <:{

White Truck is, well, a not-so-strong truck. So driving in the snow is pretty difficult. He’s decent with handling the cold and doesn’t mind goofing around with the kiddos in the cold, but I don't think he’d really want to go out on his own in it.

Beluga is pretty good at handling both and likes to goof around in the snow with the kids. She doesn't mind the cold or the wetness so honestly the winter months are no problem for her. She actually probably enjoys the winter months more than any of the others do.

Honda is mostly fine handling the cold and snow, but she’s not exactly a fan. She’ll goof around in the snow if the kids want her too, but she won’t go out on her own.

Ranger can handle the cold just fine, but being a truck an all.. driving through the snow is a little difficult at times. She’s a softie at her core but is usually not persuaded to go outside and play unless a lot of older bots are out there too. She doesn’t like to go out in the snow but she likes to keep an eye on her team when a lot of them are out in cold conditions.

Volvo can handle the cold very well because he’s so dense. His arms, legs, chest, back and every where else has many, many layers of metal. That doesn’t mean he likes it though. Driving wise he’s fine and temperature wise he’s fine, but he just doesn't like getting wet. He also has no time for “snowball fights” and “building snowmen” and what not. He’s a base hermit when it snow comes to that’s for sure.

The cold nips at Jeepy a little bit, but boy is the snow fun. Drivin, slidin, ridin, all of it is just a blast for him. He doesn’t mind the cold one bit while he’s ripping around and having fun.

Bash Buggy might just be the worst in the snow. Bash is basically 100% blind because snow screws up all 3 of his vision modes. Everything and everyone is cold and wet, so thermal doesn’t work. Grid cant latch on to the shapes around him because everything is round and the same color. And then Night vision doesn't work in the day time anyway, but the snow makes it worse none the less. His body is so severely stripped of his armor and insulation, that the cold just... uhhg, it just eats him up. His body tries so hard to keep him warm that he looses all of his energy being in it. He hates this. All of it. He just wants to be outside and hang out with his buddies, but.. he just cant. It’d probably kill him to be out there too long, so he’s stuck just being a base hermit all winter. <:{

♡♡Winterrrr~~~~♡♡ mmmm snooooowww ♡♡~~~ ♡(*´ o `*)♡ The season I was born in~~♡♡

Sadly it doesn’t snow much where I live, and when it does its only around for like 3 days. ╥﹏╥

And yes it makes me happy! I love getting asks, of all kinds! (excluding mean ones of course XD)

I like Alfred Pennyworth more, but Batman is cool too. :}

WHEEZE I-- BRuH, this is the best thing ever! XD I don’t know how quickly Doritos burst into flames but lets just pretend its pretty fast.

Escort and Vega are huddled up in a corner of the base in front of the only tiny space heater they have. They’re both shivering and quietly chatting when, I feel like Jeepy, comes up to them with this giant box.

“Is that heater helping at all?“ Jeepy asks genuinely and worried.

They pause for a moment, but then Vega shrugs and Escort makes a face and shakes his head. Jeepy then grins from ear to ear.

“WELL!“ He says kicking the heater aside and pouring out the contents of the box into the floor in front of them. Out of the box came several hundred bags of Dorito chips. 

“What are..“ Escort starts. But Jeepy is already grabbing a blowtorch out of no where and attempting to light the Doritos on fire. The Doritos quickly burst into flames, causing immediate panic. 

Escort quickly pulls Vega up from the ground and they dip. Ratchet and the other medics start freaking out. Everyone scatters and are scrambling to find the kids and a way to put out the fire. Brown suburban scoops up Jeepy and gets him away from the fire while other bots manage to find all three kids. 

Someone manages to stomp out the fire, maybe Ranger. After assuring no one was hurt and everyone is okay, they just look at Jeepy like?? WhY did you do that?? Jeepy’s like a clueless kid and was like, “Well they were cold and I heard these things were flammable soo...?”

Sigh, Jeepy’s got a few screws loose but they love him anyway. XD

Replace “Blue Suburban’s” with “my” and you just quoted Suburban.

Hmmm... Well lets see.. maybe like, if they wore clothes, what you be their iconic clothing of choice? Hmm..

Miata would have a lanyard of some kind, not sure what design it would have but I think it would be black and grey.

Escort would probably have a thin black jacket that doesn’t have a zipper. He’d wear all the time, even in summer. Its just enough to keep the chill off of him but not enough to make him overheat.

Brown Suburban would have a poorly made bracelet made of pony beads that he wears everywhere. He never talks about it and no one knows where he got it. As far as anyone knows, he doesn’t have any children..

U.M.Dragster and his sister would probably have bracelets too. Mostly likely matching ones that are souvenirs from the races.

Vega would have an old black leather baseball cap that he wears everywhere.

White Truck would have a pair of black flip flops that he wears all the time.

Beluga wouldn’t have an article of clothing, she’d have a galaxy print backpack that she takes with her when ever she has the chance.

Honda doesn’t have an article of clothing that she wears all year round. But she does have a scarf that she wears every day of winter and fall

Jeepy would have some kind of beanie that he wears all year round.

Bash Buggy might have some really small article of clothing. Like a small piece of torn fabric that he keeps in his wallet. It would be a piece of a shirt or something that he had a sentimental connection to before it was destroyed. He keeps it with him at all times, its his way of coping with the past and keeping a piece of his memories with him.

I’m not sure about the rest of them. They may have something too but I cant really think of anything..   

Cat people?

Escort Brown Suburban A.T.Dragster Honda Beluga

Dog People?

Green Truck Suburban U.M.Dragster Red Van White Truck Bash Buggy Jeepy

Doesn’t like animals?

Volvo Vega

Bird people? 

Miata.

Fish people?

Ranger

It would probably be Suburban. He’s very gentle with humans and would be very careful if he picked me up. 

I’d probably freak out a little being that high up in the air, but I know that Suburban would keep me safe.

For some reason, that felt super weird to type out.

Hmm.. lets say you said you loved him romantically.

If you managed to convince him, he’d go pretty quiet. Just looking from side to side and thinking.. He’d be fidgeting with his hands and look like he’s trying to say something but cant form the words.

“D-Do you really?“ He’d ask. If you said yes with certainty.. he’d begin to tear up.

“..Y-You can do better.. you c-can so much better than me..” 

He’d probably begin to cry. “You d-deserve so much better than me..”

Hmm... a certain funny or weird ask?.. Hm.. Well, I’m not sure about funny or weird, but this ask? 👇 

Was very well worded and S T U N G. I’ve been thinking about it recently. I really need to replace those windows, Suburban didn’t deserve that.

Yeah, they’ve both lost a lot and unfortunately relate to each other in that regard. Miata has a big heart, and seeing someone so sad and alone just really made her sad. She wanted to talk to him to try and make him feel better, but she ended up actually becoming good friends with him. He’s even her mentor now actually. :}

You missed it? :} Its about time I backed away from the red and eased my way into the blue~

I figure I should probably clear this up real quick. Miata is single too, but I said she isn’t because she just got out of a relationship with the Decepticon Zippy. So she’s not looking for love at the moment.

As for Volvo, good luck. Legit, even I don’t know what it would take to woo him, and I MADE him for crying out loud!! 

Ah my name, Factual Fantasy. I was wondering when I’d get this question. Fair warning, long explanation pending.

So you see, I have this thing I like to do with my drawings and stories. I like to incorporate truths and facts into them. I like things to function realistically, and have an explanation for everything. I’ll give you some examples.

Lets say there’s this show, and due to the storyline there's a polar bear guy that spends most of his time in warm water and in the sun. The show never addresses the fact that this would kill the polar bear due to his blubber and two layers of fur making him overheat and die.

So, how can I make this work? How can a polar bear survive comfortably in warm climates? How about this, he shaves his fur down as short as he can possibly go. So that way his winter coat is thinned out greatly and he can at least decently handle most warm weather? That’s a good explanation for something that doesn't make sense.

How about another example?

I want Gaster to be Sans and Papyrus’s dad in my AU, but there’s a lot that needs explaining. Why does Sans and Papyrus look so extremely different in so many different ways if they’re brothers? How could they have been born if there are no other skeletons to speak of in the game? Well, how about this.

Gaster wanted kids, but no longer had his wife. So he turned to science and cut a hole out of his left hand to take its DNA. He does lots of experiments on the bone piece and manages to make Sans from it. Unfortunately a lot of mistakes happened along the way which messed up Sans’s body pretty bad. Sans’s growth was messed up and he stopped growing at age 15. His magic is unstable and comes out in strong bursts when he attempts to use it.

After Sans was successful he tried again with the other hand and made Papyrus. Papyrus was made with way fewer mistakes and thus, Papyrus grew up normally and resembles his father.

This would explain where they came from and how Gaster could be their dad without the presence of a mom. This would explain why Sans looks so different from Paps and Gaster as well. It could also be the reason why Sans never usually uses his powers much. Not just because he’s lazy, but because its dangerous too.

How about one more example.. just in case..

Okay. Lets say I want to make an AU where Stanley has Bills powers but doesn't know it. How can I make that make sense? How can Stan have powers but not know it?

So I think okay, first, the powers. I want him to have Bills powers but I want Bill to be dead, So, Instead of Bill being erased, I make it that the memory gun shattered him. Making Bill dead, but his pieces remain. Giving Stanley his powers. That’s reasonable, that makes sense.

Now, how can he not know that he has these powers? Well, perhaps he only has some of Bills pieces. Maybe Bill was shattered so severely that most of him is just dust, while some of his pieces remain mostly intact. So this could mean his powers aren’t as strong and don’t really show up. So if he cant really see or feel his powers, he wouldn't know he has them.

Okay. Now of course, sooner or later Stan is going to accidentally use them right? How can he still not know he has them after he uses them? Well what if Bills activated powers + Stanley’s Human mind = black outs? Like, his mind cant handle the power so the power just takes over him, making him black out. So he uses his power, blacks out and then comes back to himself and doesn't remember anything. 

Well what about Ford? Ford would surly be around Stan when he uses his powers and remember them right? Well, what if the only times that Stan’s power has flared up strong enough to become visible was when Ford has been attacked and knocked unconscious? That way, both twins black out when the powers are used and neither of them remember it. Simple!

I took a crazy unreasonable world and made it all makes sense. It all has an explanation, an answer, facts that connect it to a realistic build. I always build my worlds on facts and reasons. Another good example is my Transformer OCs. Nearly everything about them is something related to the real cars, just shifted a little bit. Vega’s overheating, Red Vans knees, Escorts heart attack, Green Trucks leg, Bash Buggy’s blindness, the Dragsters being siblings, etc, etc, etc.

Do you get the picture..? I like to explain things. Put facts into my fiction. Make things and characters feel more real and connected to reality on a different level.

I like to, and always have, added reasoning and facts to my fantasies.

Factual, Fantasy.