#The Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes Leather Jacket

[daddytonysgirl17]

[annikityk]

I'm so not normal about the fact, that in any other pairing Zemo would be the "a little bit older, a black leather jacket" type, but in winterbaron dynamic… it just screams Bucky

[marvellous1917]

Icarus

(Part 1)

Pairing: mob!Bucky x tattoo artist!reader

Summary: you come home from work, only to find a mob boss in your house looking for your roommate.

Warnings: mentions of a gun, mentions of arms and drug trafficking, murder, kidnapping, torture, swearing, tattoos, gambling, think that’s it

A/n: I’m a simple girl. Mob!Bucky makes my brain go whurrrrrr. This is pure self service because I have this tattoo lol. Been along time guys what’s up?

————

“Late night?” The deep voice came from the dark.

“Holy-” fear spiked through your heart from the unfamiliar sound, your arms dropping the bags and your back crashing into the closed front door, “-who.. who are you?” You asked the unfamiliar voice. Turning slightly you see the long haired, leather covered man sat in the dining room. His left arm rested on the table, the prosthetic shining, the light from the street lamp outside shining through the window. His face was half shrouded in darkness, the other half showed his eyes, a little confused but also amused.

“You’re not Caleb.” He replied, sitting back in the chair, tilting his head to the side and moving something that looked suspiciously pistol shaped off of the table and into the inside pocket of his jacket, you reached up and flipped on the light.

“N-no no, I’m not. I’m his roommate.” You said, finally registering who you were talking to. The now fully visible metal arm was a pretty big giveaway, if nothing else. ‘There is a mob boss sat in my kitchen, what the fuck’.

“What do you want with Caleb? Does he owe you something?” The thought was out of your mouth before you could stop it. “Oh god no sorry forget I asked. Sorry... sir? I don’t-”

“I’m assuming from that reaction you know who I am,” He said, smirk on his face as he stood and moved closer, your back pressing flatter against the wall beside the door with every step he took.

“Of..of course I do, everyone in New York knows who you are..Sir” You replied.

“Hmm, I’m gonna take that as a compliment doll,”

“It is! Sorry! Congrats on all the… mafia shit.” Did I just say ‘mafia shit’ to a gangster.

The silence is awkward, his face blank and all you can think is ‘Oh my god I’m gonna die.’ His face twists into a …smile.. you think, y’know its hard to tell, fear has your vision all fuzzy.

He then starts to..laugh. He’s laughing? He’s actually laughing.

“Is this something you do before you kill people? You laugh, give them a false sense of security then shoot them?” You ramble quietly, confused at what’s happening.

He moved his left hand to rest on his stomach, the metal catching the light, shining right in you eye and it fully registered that, holy shit, James fucking Barnes, The Winter goddamn Soldier is in my house. This man is literally wanted by every law enforcement agent in the country, he’s in control of one of the most ruthless organisations in the world, they traffic arms and drugs and gun down anyone that gets in the way. Apparently, at least that’s what the news said. The stories about him though, way more upsetting.

The rumor was that after he left the special forces, he was captured by an organisation that wanted him to work for them. When he tried to escape the first time, they took his arm, and he was stuck working for them for a decade. The story goes that after he finally escaped, he tracked down everyone that was a part of it and killed them all, by himself. Alone. Just him. On his own. Then he took over their supply and demand and built his empire from the ground up.

“Oh god.. ‘congrats on all the mafia shit’, that’s the funniest thing I’ve heard in a while…” he pushed out while chuckling. “I’m gonna get that shit tattooed, I swear,” he said.

“I could do that for you,” it was out of your mouth before you could stop it. ‘Oh my god, shut up Y/N’ you thought to yourself.

“What?” He asked, eyes flitting over to yours, his piercing stare causing all sorts of feeling to rise inside your chest; fear, confusion, attraction. Attraction? What? Damn him and his pretty face. He’s a killer Y/N, remember that?

“Nothing, sorry” you answered, looking down at your feet.

“No what did you say Y/n?” He asked again, his voice more stern than before. If you weren’t so scared, you would have questioned how he knew your name.

“I said that I could give you that tattoo, sorry, just slipped out” you replied, unsure what his response would be to your completely unnecessary comment.

“Stop apologising would’ya doll, there’s no need.” He said, sort of sweetly, a small comforting smile on his face, the pet name causing all sorts of lovely feelings inside.

“Sor.. yes Sir,” you corrected yourself.

“And stop calling me Sir darlin, only my employees call me that,” he said, “well my employees and some others..” he said with a dirty smirk, causing your eyebrows to raise sky high.

“Sorry Sir,” you said quickly, not even thinking. “…shit.”

“Seriously doll, you don’t need to be so scared of me,” he stated, his right hand reaching out and landing on your shoulder, your muscles tensing for a second then relaxing when you saw the look in his eye, he was telling the truth

“Ok.. then can I ask why you are here?” You ask, some fear creeping it’s way into your voice despite his reassurance. He kept his face carefully still and he looked you up and down, the feeling of being examined was strong, like he was trying to decide if you were worthy of knowing his business.

“You got it right earlier, your roommate owes me something, and I came to get it from him,” he removes his hand from your arm as he spoke after a tense silence. He was being purposely vague, trying to gage your reaction, to see if you were really clueless or you were playing with him.

“It’s money right, I mean it has to be, what else could he owe you. I told him to stop freaking borrowing money I swear I tried to stop him, but he never listened to me..l”

“You’re rambling darlin, you realise that?” He cuts you off with a smirk on his face.

“I’ve been told I do that when I’m nervous. I don’t know how much Caleb owes you and I don’t know what the situation is but.. if you.. I mean..”

“What doll? What are you trying to say. I won’t be mad, I swear,” Barnes responds, one side of his lips tugging upwards at your mumbling.

“Could you give him some more time?”

He was not expecting that. ‘Brave little thing’ he thought.

“I mean I don’t know how long he’s owed you for but he’s getting back on track I swear, he’s getting better, he is, in-fact he’s at a gamblers anonymous meeting right now, and he has a job interview tomorrow so he can pay rent and pay back people he owes money to.” You rush out, trying to help your friend, “Of course he never told me that he owes money to a mobster but that besides the point” you add quieter, more to yourself than anything but Barnes still heard it. He chuckled and ran his flesh hand through his hair, pushing back the long strands out of his face.

“He does owe money to a mobster, quite a lot in fact so I’m gonna have to say no to that request darlin, I’ve given him long enough.” He responds, his tone dripping with authority, the Brooklyn drawl on the pet name he threw out made your heart beat faster.

“Please. Please just think about it Sir.. uh Mr Barnes.. Sir. Caleb’s had a rough go of it lately, he lost his father not too long ago and he’s been a mess ever since, if you could just give..”

“I already said no once doll, I don’t like repeating myself.” His tone was final, and even though his words were not that intense, the threat in his voice hung in the air like poison gas before slamming into your chest, the fear that had previously been quelled came racing back, sitting on your shoulders like a lead coat.

The silence stayed for longer this time, you eyes firmly fixed to the floor to a sound even the possibility of upsetting the man that had broken into your home.

“So you’re a tattoo artist huh? He asked, his low voice calming you some. Huh he’s trying to make me less afraid of him, what kind of ruthless criminal is he?

“Yes..um I am,” you answer, incredibly aware of the position you were in, better to go along with whatever he did.

“You got a flash book?” He questioned, genuinely interested.

“Uh yeah I do.” You reply awkwardly, not sure where this new line of conversation was coming from.

“Can I see it?”

“…sure,” the word came out as a question.

He nodded at you, and you took it as a sign that you were good to move. Turning slowly and moving away from the wall to your bag on the floor, you reach down and grab your flash sketchbook and hand it to him.

“Are all of these available?” He asked, flipping through the pages, taking in each design.

Seeing him like this, calmly looking through the sketchbook makes it very easy to forget who he was, a ruthless calculating Mob Boss, wanted for almost every crime under the sun.

“The ones with the X’s over them have been done before but could be repeated if someone really wanted it,” you answered, slightly more confident in yourself as you were talking about something you loved.

“This is Latin, right, what does it mean?” He asked, moving to stand next to you pointing to a design in the book, an alien inside a bottle of wine.

“‘In Vino Veritas’, it means ‘In wine, there is truth’” you say, “ I though it was funny, y’know.. ‘the truth is out there’..aliens..” you trailed off, not sure how to explain that design

He let out an quiet amused sound, his shoulder brushing yours, sending a trail of chills down your spine.

“This one is beautiful,” he said, pointing to a different design on the next page.

“Thank you, it’s Icarus, I have it tattooed on me, it was hard as hell doing it on my own leg,” you say, proud of the design you created.

“Icarus, what’s his story? I can’t quite remember, ” he asks.

“It’s a Greek myth y’know, Icarus and his father were held captive by King Minos in a tower, his father created wax wings so they could fly away from their captors. The father warned Icarus from flying too high or too low, but he ignored his fathers warnings and flew too close to the sun and his wings melted. It’s a moral story to warn against the dangers of complacency and hubris, but to me it’s just a tragedy.” You say, turning to face him, making eye contact with the man. He listened intently to the story, his face unreadable but you thought you saw a flash of something in his eyes, maybe he related to the myth, a man that was once held captive, now with everything in his hands, in danger of losing it all if he flew too close to the sun himself.

“A tragedy huh? I don’t think there’s anything tragic about it. He was warned not to do something dangerous and he went and did it anyway, it’s his own damn fault,” he stated, something slightly argumentative in his tone.

He looked straight at you while speaking and you couldn’t help but feel as if he was looking into your soul, like his statement was some kind of test.

“I agree with the idea that he got what he deserved, but I meant it as a tragedy for his father. Creating something so pure for you and your child to escape from captivity, only for your child to ignore your warnings and pay the ultimate price for it. His father probably spent the rest of his life regretting escaping his prison because that was the action that ultimately lead to his sons death. It’s heartbreaking if you see it from a different perspective,” you say back, not really expecting him to engage you in a philosophical debate.

“Hmm.. that’s an interesting way to see it, I’m not really one for looking at different perspectives, mine suits me just fine,” he answered, the fact that this man was dangerous came screaming back to you with the look on his face, blank like he was devout of all emotion at that moment. You got the feeling he wasn’t speaking metaphorically anymore.

The tension was palpable, you not knowing what to say next and him deciding he was done talking for the time being. He placed the book down on a side table, and turned back to you. “Y’know what, I want it.” He said, confusing flooding your brain.

“Want what?” You ask calmly, not wanting to push your luck with the man.

“That tattoo, the Icarus one, I want it.” He answers, leaning back against the side of the table he was sat at earlier. His crossed his arms, which should have been intimidating, but for some reason the only thought floating through your head was Damn his arms are bigger than my head. Gimmie.

“You want the Icarus?” You ask, somewhat stupidly and he had just said that.

“Yes I do,” he answered simply, “Are you free tomorrow?” He asks, smile on his face.

“Umm not really, I have a few appointments tomo..”

“Move them, hell cancel them. Block out a spot long enough for me to get this tattoo.” He states, cutting of your sentence.

“I can’t do that, it’s too short notice and I could loose..”

“I’ll pay what ever you lose for cancelling the appointments. I’m getting this done, tomorrow.” He cuts you off again, a finality in his tone that warns you it would be pointless and probably rather stupid to argue.

“Uh..ok” you respond, shaking your head a little, still trying to figure out what just happened.

“Great.” He clapped his hands together and the sound made you jump. Barnes either didn’t notice it or just didn’t care. “Give me your phone.”

“Huh? Why do you want my phone?” You question.

Barnes just rolled his eyes, walked forward until he was stood right infront of you, toe to toe, staring down at you with a semi amused look on his face.

“How am I supposed to find out where your shop is if you don’t text me the location?” He said sarcastically.

Literally a million different ways, google it for starters, get one of your goons to find it, stalk me and follow me there.. c’mon man think. Obviously you kept these thoughts to yourself but Barnes smirked as if he could hear them anyway. Pulling out your phone and handing it to him you ask, “What time do you want to come in for?”

“Around 1-ish doll, that ok?” He asked, knowing that it is, as he’s already told you to move/cancel your other appointments.

“That’s fine by me Bar..Mr Barnes” you answer, slipping up, almost forgetting the level of respect you should probably show to the gangster in your home.

He calls his phone from yours, adding the new number to contacts in both phones, “there, now you can let me know the address of your shop.”

“I’ll sent it to you tomorrow.. unless you want me to send it now?” You asked he hands your phone back , uncertain of what he wanted

“Tomorrows fine” he answers, walking backwards towards the front door, “I’ll see ya in the afternoon doll,” he says while opening the door and mostly leaving until he pauses completely, slowly turning back towards you.

This is it, he’s been messing with me this whole time and now he’s going to shoot me.

“Tell Caleb he has 6 weeks to get my money back to me or I’ll be paying him another visit, ok doll.” He says, no question in his voice. He waits until you answer with a “Yes, Mr Barnes,” and disappears into the hallway outside your apartment.

It takes about 5 minutes for the shock to fully wear off, and it causes you to stagger over to the couch, fall backwards onto it an ask into the empty room, “What the actual fuck just happened?”

As soon as the question was out of your mouth , your phone buzzed in your hand.

James:

Don’t ever call me Mr Barnes again Y/n.

It makes me feel ancient.

I hate that.

[lives-in-midgard]

Finally Safe

Paring: Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: After being kidnapped from Hydra you get saved by Bucky and the Avengers.

Word Count: 1300

A/N: Hey everyone! I finally wrote a Bucky fanfic again and I hope you like it!

Divider made by @firefly-graphics

Masterlist

 You weren’t sure where you were or how long you had been there. You didn’t know what time it was or what day it was. Has it been weeks or months since you were there? You weren’t sure. The only thing you knew was that you were on your way home from work. It was only a short walk, so you decided to walk. You always thought it is a safe path until someone hit your head and you suddenly woke up in a cell in a place where no one would probably ever find you.

You were so scared, especially when these strange men came to you. The first day they didn’t do anything to you and just laughed, but the next day they started doing experiments on you. The experiments made you feel nauseous, and you began to feel a change. Whatever they wanted to do to you seemed to work. After a while you finally found out where you were…it’s a HYDRA base. You couldn’t believe it. You’ve heard stories about them. Scary things. The winter soldier was one of those things you heard about. Is he still here?

You always had to think about your friends and family. Are they looking for you or did the people who kidnapped you made it look like you died? Every night you cried yourself to sleep and hoped that one day someone would come and save you. Maybe the Avengers would somehow find out about this Hydra base and save you. Maybe this was just your dream, and no one could ever save you, but you didn’t lose hope. Not even after everything they did to you.

You suddenly woke up when you heard someone screaming and it sounded like someone was fighting. You quickly sat up and took a shaky breath because of the injury on your left arm. There was again a scream to hear. What happened?

Suddenly a loud noise was heard, and your door opened. You couldn’t recognize him…you have never seen this man before and he didn’t look like the others here. He had short brown hair, a black leather jacket and then you noticed that he has a metal arm. You got scared and moved further to the back of the room so that your back was leaning against the wall.

“Hey, it’s okay…I won’t hurt you.” He said in a soft tone and made a few steps near you.

“I’m Bucky.” He knelt down in front of you. Bucky looked friendly, but you weren’t sure if you could trust him.

“You can trust me, I promise.” He said with a worried look. You thought about it for a second, but then you told him your name and he began to smile. Then he reached to his ear.

“I found someone.” Bucky looked at you while saying that.

“Okay, let’s get out of here.” He said to you. Then he stood up and reached his hand out for you. You took his hand and stood up.

“You stay behind me…I promise I’ll get you out of here.” He said with a slight smile. As you followed Bucky through the halls, it was quiet until a Hydra agent suddenly appeared who started to attack Bucky. Then everything happened so fast they started to fight and suddenly more came. Then a shield flew behind you and you jumped to the side. Captain America and some more Avengers came to help. When you saw another guy trying to hurt Bucky from behind, you finally got out of your shock and wanted to help him. It was the perfect time to use the powers they gave you. You pointed your hand at him and then he started to turn to ice.

“Woah, what was that?” One of the avengers said while Bucky looked at you impressed. You helped them take down the others by using your power and turning them into ice and stone.

When you walked outside with them, they talked about how amazing you were.

“You okay?” Bucky asked quietly.

“Yeah.” You mumbled and looked away again. As you sat down in the quinjet, Bucky sat down next to you.

“Oh no, you’re bleeding.” Bucky said when he noticed the wound on your left arm.

“That’s from yesterday…it must have started bleeding again.”

“Steve, can you get me the first aid kit?” Bucky asked, looking over to Steve, who nodded. A few seconds later Steve was back, handing it to Bucky and giving you a soft smile. Bucky gently took care of your wound and wrapped a bandage over it.

“Thank you for saving me.” You said, looking into his beautiful blue eyes.

“You’re welcome. I’m so glad that I could save you.”

You didn’t talk much the rest of the fly. Steve told you that you would be staying at the Avengers compound for a while and that there is a spare room next to Bucky’s room.

It was already dark when you landed at the compound. You followed them into the building and to the living room.

“I’ll go get you some clothes of mine, so you can change.” Wanda said and you nodded.

“And I’ll make you a sandwich.” Natasha announced and went into the kitchen. You sat down on the couch next to Bucky and Steve. After a while Wanda came back with some clothes. Then you changed into some new clothes which made you feel a little better, then you ate the sandwich, and Bucky showed you to your room.

“If you need anything, doesn’t matter what time just knock on my door, okay?” Bucky said and you nodded.

“Okay, thank you Bucky.”

“Of course.” He said with a smile.

You sat down on the bed and began to smile. You were happy that you are finally safe. After a while you laid down in bed and tried to sleep but it took a long time for you to fall asleep.

When you woke up you let out a scream. You had a nightmare that felt so real, like you were there again. You sat up quickly, starting to sweat and starting to breath fast. Someone opened the door to your room and ran over to you.

“Hey, it’s okay. You’re okay, you’re safe.” Bucky whispered as he sat down next to you.

“Bucky.” You mumbled and reached for his arm.

“Yeah, it’s me.” He said but it still didn’t calm you down and Bucky was really worried about you.

“Let’s try to breath together, okay?” He suggested and you tried to nod and follow his breathing. But it didn’t work that well.

“Okay, let’s try something else, doll.” He said and then laid down next to you.

“Put your head on my chest and try to follow my breathing.” Bucky said in a gentle tone. You did as he said and laid your head on his chest. Then Bucky started rubbing your back, you listened to his heartbeat and tried to follow his breathing.

“That’s it, doll. Just breathe in and out.”

“You’re doing so well, doll.” With every minute you were laying like this, you felt better and safer. After you calmed down, you looked up at Bucky.

“Thank you.” You whispered and Bucky smiled at you.

“You’re welcome, doll. I’m so sorry you had to go through all that.” Bucky said in a sad voice.

“It wasn’t you’re fault.”

“I know but you don’t deserve it, no one does.” Bucky said and you nodded.

“You should try to get some sleep.” Bucky suggested.

“Can you stay here?” You asked.

“Of course.” He said and you laid your head back on his chest. Bucky held you and gave you a kiss on the forehead. After a while you fell asleep in his arms and felt safer than you ever did.

Taglist:

@marvelogic | @eviebuggg | @buckys-wintersoldier | @nicoline1998enilocin | @kandis-mom | @sergeantbarnessdoll | @noellez-best-life23 | @sgtgarricks | @ratchildspartan | @scott-loki-barnes |  @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 | @mrsbuckybarnes1917 | @brnesblogposts

@beaubbdoll

[fluffysucker]

Miss Americana & The heartbreak Prince

Bucky Barnes x Reader (AU)

In no world were you meant to be together, but in every universe, you were meant for each other.

A/N: I present you grumpy sunshine wrapped in enemies(ish) to lovers with Beefy Boxer/Biker Bucky.

Written in Third POV. No use of Y/N. However, the reader is referred to as a female. Likes, comments, reblogs are VERY VERY highly appreciated.

Also, I tried to be as inclusive as possible. But my delusion couldn't be controlled I'm sorry.

Ngl this is for me more than anything.

Also, I'm thinking about making this its own universe and maybe write more of it. Tell me what you think

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

You hated Bucky Barnes, and he hated you.

The two of you should have never crossed paths. Your worlds should have never met. But the wall separating you could only hold for so long.

The infamous boxer was a phenomenon in his field. Unbeatable and astute, Bucky Barnes held his reputation with pride. He was stronger than all and the smartest the game had. His jab was as numbing as the winter. His techniques were as calculated as a soldier's. Bucky Barnes was as hard as nails. A legend.

To keep up with the notoriety, it was rumoured that Barnes and his team were also a biker gang. It was never confirmed, but the black leather jacket he always had on, the long hair touching his shoulder or tidied in a low bun, the motorbike barked in front of the gym, and the intimidating sense lingering around him. It was never denied, either.

In the mornings, Bucky Barnes ran a successful gym with his two bestfriends, Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson. Both played occasionally, but only Bucky was the professional, so they were more his trainers. They also trained other players and armatures. They tried to gain other normal customers, but it didn't always work. With a reputation like theirs, attracting customers wasn't easy.

It was usually the same for nights, unless they had matches. Most of their fights were held on Stark's property. He ran an empire, and boxing was the dominant centre, led by the biggest champion. And Stark lets Bucky have it his way, just like he likes. As long as Bucky keeps on bringing these huge numbers into their pockets, both are happy and content.

So it was out of the nature for Bucky to have zero interest in the new restaurant that opened up right next door to the gym. They had their regularly frequented places. The bar run by Romanoff and Belova, a couple of blocks away from Stark's property, was more than enough. He didn't even bother to throw a glance at it. Even after he knew that the owner had come by and given out menus and promised them discounts if they stopped by, there was still nothing.

Until one night. Bucky got carried away in training. He had an important match coming up. He knew his opponent barely stood a chance, but Bucky enjoyed the thriller of the game. The sweat and blood that go into it He didn't remember a time when he didn't want to do this. It was like it was programmed so deeply in his brain. He was made for this.

Everyone left, one by one. Until then, it was only him. After so many hours, he finally got tired. He threw his gloves aside and went to take a shower to remove the evidence of his hard work before going back home. As he was locking the gym's door, he heard his stomach growl, reminding him that he needed food. He was starving. Before deciding to wait and order food once he got home, the big sign caught his eye. They did indeed have a restaurant right next door. He admitted he was too tired to cook or wait for delivery. He needed food, then crashed into his bed. So maybe the closest restaurant would be useful.

Once he stepped in, he felt out of place immediately. His dark clothes and huge frame made him look like a stranger compared to the light-coloured painted walls. Some had flowers, and others had stars drawn on them. There were fairy lights in some corners. The aromatic scent was everywhere. Bucky almost winced at how bright and colourful everything felt. This was an alternative universe that he didn't belong in.

"Hi, how can I help you?" An even sweeter voice rang and caught Bucky's attention, breaking him from his trance of observing the place.

He turned around to find the prettiest girl he had ever seen standing behind the counter. Your beauty caught him off guard. He never believed someone could be so beautiful before. But here you were, standing. Taking his breath away.

He recovered very quickly and moved to stand in front of the counter. With the most loving smile, you handed him the menu. He took a look at the menu and wanted to laugh out loud. Dish names were just as cheerful as the atmosphere.

Out of habit, you started explaining and recommending stuff for him. He interrupted you, putting in his order. You didn't give it much thought but took his order happily.

You apologised for the lack of waiters, as it was almost closing time and it was only you. No answer. With his blank stare, you told him he could sit wherever he wanted. Only then did he notice the empty restaurant. It was just you and him. It was that late. So he took a seat at the nearest table.

Not taking much, you returned with his order. You placed it in front of him with a big smile on your face. You knew right away who that was the minute he walked in. James Barnes. The famous boxer who trains next door You have been praying after your small visit to them that they would be regular customers. The business was doing great. But the more, the merer. Always. Lots of people warned you about the men next door. But you didn't feel like they were as bad as people made them out to be. You were always so trusting, unless shown otherwise. So you were happy that, finally, one of them stopped by.

You moved away, letting him enjoy his food. Unable to fight your nature, you started talking to him as you continued cleaning the remaining parts of the place. No answer again. He didn't even bother to look at you. Okay. Maybe he had a rough day. Not all people are used to chatting.

Bucky was one of these people. His eyes widened as you started talking to him. People were never that friendly to him. People avoided him. Nobody tried to open up a conversation with him. He didn't know how to react. And he was too tired to try. So he practiced his other specialty. Silence. But even if he wouldn't admit it, Bucky found your voice calming. So he let you talk instead of just shutting you up.

You reduced your talking to a minimum. Only little remarks there and then to avoid complete silence. The second time, you heard his voice since he walked in and asked for the check. You brought the paper to the table he occupied, keeping your smile up and telling him that he got the 'neighbour discount' as you called it. You almost heard his scoff as you left him.

You had your back to the door, so you only turned around when you heard the door close. You didn't hear his footsteps, and most definitely, you didn't hear his goodbye, goodnight, or even thank you. Now that's rude.

You returned to the table to collect the check. But you found the review note you attached to every check empty. Not a single penmark. And that was more rude. You made sure that filling out the note only took seconds. You genuinely cared to hear people's opinions so you could be better and have the restaurant grow more.

So he didn't speak to you for more than two sentences. Didn't say thank you or goodbye. Didn't fill in the note. Okay, maybe you didn't want them as customers if they were all that rude.

It turns out they weren't that rude. However, Bucky was more rude than you thought.

A couple of days after Bucky's visit, you were surprised to see Bucky with another two men. You guessed they were Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson. The trio was all well-known. You doubted if Bucky was the one to recommend the restaurant. You weren't sure if he even liked the food. And you were right. He would be caught dead if he brought up the fairy world you called a restaurant. Even when it served the tastiest food he had ever had,

It was a slow day. No intense training or excessive fight preparation The three men didn't have much to do that day. So when Steve suggested trying out the restaurant, Bucky neither objected nor showed excitement.

So when they walked in, you couldn't help the feeling of surprise along with the tiny bit of happiness, hoping it would be a nicer visit this time. After preparing their orders and sending them out, you waited for a bit before you left the kitchen to greet them. Not before making sure you looked presentable.

With the small space and their loud voices, it wasn't hard to locate them. You approached them with a big smile and positive attitude.

"I wanted to make sure you were having a good time." You followed up after introducing yourself.

"The food is amazing. This burger is to die for." Steve was the first to compliment you, with Sam nodding and agreeing.

"You have one good chef." Sam added as he took another french fry into his mouth. "Send my regards to them."

"Actually, I'm also the chef." The statement caused a shocked expression to fill in their faces. They asked for details, and you briefly told them how you were the core of the small business as the owner and main chef.

The two men were polite, and they didn't seem annoyed by your chatty personality. In fact, they interacted with you and asked questions to learn more. And all they had to say were nice compliments. Except one.

"So tell me, sweetheart, what was the inspiration for the place? Was it a fairy garden or Disney's latest cartoon?" None of you were ready for the sarcastic comment Bucky threw at you.

You didn't let your smile break in the face of his sarcasm. Nor did you give much thought to the pet name. You put on a bigger smile now, looking at him.

"A bit of both." That's one thing about you: you refused to let the world change about you. You never reciprocate rudeness with rudeness.

"I can tell." Bucky was taken back by your response. He expected you to get offended, but you didn't.

"Thank you. It was my vision all along." You replied, your smile never leaving your face.

And that started your hate relationship with Bucky Barnes.

After that day, the men became regular customers. And it wasn't just the three men. Little by little, it was most of the team. First, it was just to try the good food. Then it was because they wanted to. They wouldn't admit it, but your place was like a breath of fresh air. Something so different from what they are used to. From what they are known for. From what people expected from them. And you never judged them, treated them differently, or asked about the rumours that followed them. So it was a calm change, but much needed.

But their favourite thing was yours and Bucky's constant bickering. Or more Bucky's. Nobody understood why Bucky was doing this. You never partook in his constant attempts to make fun of you. You always had a sweet response to fire back. You truly were the living embodiment of killing them with kindness.

However, he never stopped. Every time he stepped foot in the place, you claimed it was your biggest achievement. He had something rude to say. Something to annoy you with. Something to bother you. Sarcasm and jokes spilling out of him with no end whatsoever.

The number of times you wanted to punch him or snap at him right back was increasing. But you refused to give in. To let him win. He wouldn't be the one to change you. So you kept engaging with him only with gracious things to say.

Besides, you chose to think that everyone had their own battles and demons. And for sure, Bucky looked like he had lots of them. He looked rougher than most. His job made him appear invincible, but he wasn't. Nobody was. So he may drive you mad, but he deserves the gentle treatment you offered all.

Bucky had no idea why he was doing it. Why every time he saw you, he felt the urge to tease you. It wasn't like him. But he didn't fight it back.

"How are you, Tinkerbell?"

"You should buy green carpets. It will finish off the garden aesthetic."

"Here is the princess who got lost."

"The pasta was great, Barbie."

Stuff like this flew from him all the time. And not once did you get back at him. You stayed nice and polite. Your sweet self never crumbling.

There was something in you that drove him insane. Your warm eyes. Your bright smile. Your cheerful voice. Your positive mindset. Your kind heart. Your friendly nature. Your hard work. Your delicious food. Your colourful wardrobe of dresses, skirts, tops, and cardigans. He couldn't pinpoint what it was. Maybe it was all of it.

The deepest part of him knew why he was doing this. He liked you. He liked you so much. From the moment he entered your restaurant alone, the first time And the more he knew you, the more he liked you. You were special. And you were everything he wasn't. He thought if he got closer, he would be tinting you. He would bring darkness to your shine. A moral thing preventing him from speaking his truth. even thinking about it.

So he acted like a teenager. He made fun of you. In hopes of making you hate him. He convinced himself and the others that he didn't like your sunshine personality.

Until one day

It started off like any normal day. Bucky had a match coming up. So they all had something to do. The day was going fine. Up before Peter Parker, who was usually on reception duties, ran in and said there was fire in your place,

For a second, blood ran cold in Bucky's body. He heard ringing in his ears. Were you okay? He collected himself quickly, wanting to check for himself.

He threw the gloves away, almost pushing everybody out of the way to get out. And he was the first to see the chaos in the street. A firetruck was parked, and firemen were going in and out of your restaurant along with some policemen. His eyes were searching for you frantically until he spotted you.

You had some dust on your face and your white clothes. You were checking that everyone was okay and out safely. But you couldn't hide the quivering of your lips or your shaking body.

He couldn't help himself as he ran towards you. You turned as you felt someone approaching you. Without your control, your face softened, and tears blurred your sight once you noticed who it was.

"Bucky." You whispered as a way to ground yourself from all the mess that happened and is still happening.

Following his first instincts, Bucky pulled you into his chest, wrapping your trembling form in his arms and holding you so close to him. And the dam broke.

Sobs fled from you. Tears mixed with his sweat. Your fists gripped his white tank top. Your face hidden away in his chest.

You didn't know how it happened. You had been holding up well enough during it all. You had been managing the situation the best you could. However, when Bucky got here, your mind stopped working. Your mind gave up on you, letting your emotions hit you with full force, breaking down your bastion with no guarantee you would be caught.

But you were. You were braced by strong amrs, rubbing your back, laying small kisses on your hair, and whispering words of comfort in your ears. "I'm here. I'm right here." "You're okay. You're fine."

Your sobs ceased, but your body still shook against Bucky's. Tears remained to fall freely on your face. Bucky's hold was still firm but secure around you.

You only moved away from him when a policeman approached you, informing you that you were needed at the police station.

"I'm coming with you." Bucky's stern voice left no room for negotiation. It wasn't up to debate. He wasn't leaving you.

"I'll grab my stuff in a second." He turned to the policeman standing in front of you, making sure it was okay that he joined. And he got a nod of approval in return.

He left your side, walking towards the gym. He paid no attention to his friends standing by, who were puzzled by the encounter. And true to his words, he came back in seconds, his black leather jacket on, phone in hand, and wallet in hand.

He got to you, letting his hand wrap around your shoulder. The gesture was welcomed by you as you rested your head on his chest. Something about having Bucky spread calmness in you

At the police station, Bucky found out what really happened. It wasn't just fire. It was a robbery. A bunch of armed men attacked your restaurant, demanding money from you and all the people inside. As you are trying to handle the situation without panicking more, it was discovered that one of the customers was a cop, which sent the robbers into an unexpected turn. So they took all they could from the cash register and your own things before setting the kitchen on fire to run away without being caught.

Between talking with the insurance company, the bank, and watching security footage from your restaurants and the street, you spent the rest of the day in the station.

And Bucky didn't leave your side for a second of it.

He didn't leave you until you both got out of the cap in front of your apartment. And he didn't leave until he made sure you got inside safely.

Something about you being hurt sent Bucky into a spiral. Who was heartless enough to hurt such a sweet soul as you? To look at you and not want to give you everything? Bucky would never know. All he knew was that he never wanted to see you so afraid and shaken like today. To not see your smile lighting up your face. So he would do whatever it took to make sure you were always fine.

Which was why you found him by your building the first thing in the morning.

"You have lots of places to go today. Said I would join you."

And up until you were handed the keys to your restaurant brand new after the insurance company had finished the repairs, Bucky didn't leave you. He was always there. Helping you finish papers, going to the police station to identify the robbers, and buying new stuff for the restaurants. Everything. He was there for everything.

And you had to admit. It was lovely to have him. A helping hand you needed. Physically and emotionally. Someone to share this unfortunate journey with. And Bucky didn't bother it for a bit. And you appreciated having him.

So, it only felt right for him to be your first order after the reopening.

The truth was, you never hated Bucky, no matter how much you tried. His huge form, his steel blue eyes, his signature stare, his playful smirk. They all made you feel something. He made you feel something you couldn't quite understand. But it was a pleasant something. He annoyed you so much, but you never took it too seriously. Maybe he hated you, but you didn't.

Now, you didn't need him. You were ready to carry on with your life. He didn't know how to get back to normal. He couldn't. He couldn't pretend you didn't make his heart beat faster. You made his days better. But he was so unworthy of you. And he knew you could never look at him. Maybe you hated him, but he didn't.

He tried to get back to his life. Only training and matches. Only visiting your place with the others who quickly figured out what was happening. He needed to get you out of his mind. That lasted for two days.

When Bucky was closing the gym, he heard something coming from your restaurant. With a frown, he moved to see you still inside. He looked at his watch to check the time again. It was indeed late.

"What are you doing?" He didn't bother with greetings as he entered.

"Hi, Bucky." Your cheerful voice rang through the empty place.

"What are you doing?" He repeated his question, looking at the paper in front of you.

"I'm sending out advertisements and deal offerings to different places." You answered him with a smile.

"Sweetheart, do you know what time it's?" Bucky signed as he looked at you, looking clueless.

"C'mon, let's get you home." He moved towards you, taking the papers out of your hand and putting them down without messing them.

"But I have a lot to do." You tried to protest as he gathered your stuff and helped you out.

"It will still be here in the morning." And he was having none of it.

"I need to get the business going." You added.

"You can do that in the morning, too." Bucky led you out of the restaurant in spite of your complaining.

He took the key from your hand and handed it back to you after he closed up. You expected him to move away, but he didn't.

"How are you going to get home?" He hoped you wouldn't give him the answer he had in mind.

"It's not very far. I was going to walk." And it was it.

Do you not care about your safety, or do you think you are James Bond?

Bucky had to bite his tongue and not scold you right on the spot. He knew you were stressed about the business, so he didn't want to add more.

"Great. I was going somewhere there, too. Let me walk."

"You were?" You questioned him, not believing him, but he nodded quickly.

As a matter of fact, Bucky didn't have anywhere to go other than collapsing on his bed. But over his dead body were you going to walk back home alone in this hour

"Lead the way, princess." The return of the name, but a smile on your face. He may mean it as an insult. You didn't care. It sounded good coming from him.

And the two of you walked.

And somehow, without planning, it became a routine.

Bucky would finish at the gym and come straight to the restaurant. It didn't matter whether it was late or not. He would get in and wait till you were done with the day. Then he would walk you home. Sometimes, he would help with stuff, but most times, you would make him sit down and bring him tonnes of food you prepared just for him.

"You train so hard. Don't want to burn these muscles. Eat and rest."

You weren't stupid. You knew he had nothing to do with where you were living. Yet he still chose to go out of his way, walk you home, and wait until you got in. He was taking care of you. So you wanted to take care of him too.

It felt strange to Bucky. Nobody made sure if he was eating well enough, drinking enough water, and resting enough. Nobody ever did. Everybody treated him like he was a machine. Like he He needed nothing.

Then there you were. Feeding him with delicious food. Letting him relax. Laughing at his jokes. Your hands grazing softly. It was all foreign to him, but very welcome. And he was getting attached. He knew it. How could he not?

He had the sweetest and most loving person on the planet, showing him attention and care.

Bucky counted the minutes until he could be with you. Until he could walk you home, it would be just the two of you. You did most of the talking, telling him about your day or an interesting story you heard. He would tell you briefly about his day.

He loved listening to you. Every detail you shared with him. You were the first in his life to be carefree around him other than his family. You didn't let his stiff demeanour affect your friendly one.

The extra time he spent back to his place from yours didn't bother him in the slightest. He found it reassuring that he knew for sure you were safe at home. It was all worth it.

Every single one of Bucky's friends knew what was happening from the moment he asked to postpone a match to go somewhere with you when you're repairing the restaurant. And it became so clear when he stopped hanging out at Natasha's bar after matches, claiming he was tired. But, in truth, he only wanted to be with you. And the days he knew he couldn't turn it down, especially after a grand victory, he would be glued to his phone until you texted him that you were home. Then he may start celebrating.

Bucky almost punched Steve in the face when he brought up inviting you to one of the matches, or at least to hang out with the whole team at Natasha's bar. Bucky wanted you nowhere near this world. He couldn't imagine you watching him while he was fighting. You would never look at him again. Yes, you were kind, but in the ring, he was a beast. You didn't deserve to see how bad he could be.

That's why he never acted on his feelings for you. He knew he was falling for you. He knew from the start. But you deserved better. So much better.

Your radiant nature had no place near him.

He even tried to stop seeing you, feeling guilty for ever getting close to you. But he failed miserably. You gave him something nobody did. A light in the darkness.

So he bottled it and felt grateful that you even let him be your friend. Or whatever you were.

Before a fact came crushing. You were single.

The days following matches were usually very slow. So he left earlier than usual just to come and wait for you. As long as you wanted. He had a bandage on his forehead and a compression bandage around his hand.

Sometimes you forget what his job was. Until he shows up bruised and bandaged like this. You knew he was strong enough to handle himself. He was the best in the game. But you couldn't help the twinge of your heart at the thought of him hurt.

So you prepared extra food and drinks for him. Once it was evening, you kept your best table for him. You even brought the air freshener with the scent; he commented once that he liked it. Everything to help him relax.

You kept telling yourself you were only doing this because he liked to help everyone. But you knew it was very different. He was very different.

So when he stepped in, your big smile got bigger.

You tried to come and talk with him whenever you could, but it was a busy day. He had no problem. He enjoyed watching you work. You were so dedicated and smart. He wanted you to be the most successful chef and owner in the world.

But maybe he shouldn't have been watching. He should have paid attention to anything else. So he wouldn't have seen the man who had been flirting with you since he walked in.

It was taking everything in Bucky to not get up and throw the guy away. But he heard it. Your answer to his question "Yes, I'm single." And he was reminded of the cruelty of the world. You weren't his. He shouldn't be jealous. He shouldn't have been biting the inside of his mouth when the guy tried to touch your hand as you handed him his bill.

And he most definitely shouldn't be feeling like crying and burning down the world when the guy asked you out and left his number.

Wasn't that what he wanted? For you to have better than him. To have someone who wasn't surrounded by blood and pain. Someone who wouldn't defile your glimmer That guy looked decent enough. Maybe that was your chance to find love.

However, he wanted to tear that paper to pieces. He wanted to punch the guy for asking his girl. But you weren't his girl.

Bucky was conflicted by his emotions. He didn't know what to feel or how to think. So he did the thing he was the best at. He stayed silent.

You noticed right away the change in his mood. He wasn't the most talkative person, but this silence was different. He looked like he was somewhere else. Somewhere, that wasn't so nice.

"Are you sure that you are fine?" You asked as you came to a stop in front of your building.

You only got a nod as an answer.

"You know you can tell me anything. I'm always going to be here."

Your words finally made him look at you after you left the restaurant.

"You are?" His hesitant tone made you frown.

"Of course." You answered very quickly.

"Are you going to go out with this guy?" It was quiet; you almost missed it, but you didn't.

Bucky didn't know what happened. He promised himself he wouldn't bring it up. It had nothing to do with him. But he couldn't. It fell from him.

"Do you want me to?" Your reply was something he didn't expect at all.

You couldn't say you weren't disappointed when Bucky did nothing when the guy started flirting with you. You didn't know what you wanted him to do. But you wanted him to do something.

Instinctively, Bucky moved closer to you, standing right in front of you.

"No, I don't want to."

"Tell me why I shouldn't go out with him."

The space between the two of you was almost nonexistent. You were so close to each other. His blue eyes piercing into yours. His eyes were filled with something so warm that you couldn't quite figure it out.

Bucky didn't know how to answer your question. Why didn't he want you to go out with the guy? Well, he didn't want you to go out with any guy. So he threw caution to the wind and followed his heart.

You almost tripped, but his hands on your waist steadied you. The feeling of his lips on yours was something out of the world. His lips were a bit bruised, but they were soft. It was all so good that your mind stopped working.

Bucky was about to pull away and apologise profoundly when you didn't kiss him back. As he was about to move, your hands wrapped themselves around his neck, pulling him closer to you and kissing him.

The kiss was gentle, and it was filled with emotions. Loving ones. It sent electricity through your bodies. It spread warmth all over you.

Your need for oxygen made you break the kiss, hands still around each other, eyes only looking at each other.

"I thought you hated me."

"Never did. Not for a second, princess."

Bucky's lips smashed against yours once again. And it was like every piece was falling into its place. The puzzle was completed. The rainbow after the rain

You were the shining star in Bucky's dark sky. He may not deserve you, but he was going to do everything in his power to get you to shine more.

Because you were made for each other.

[hungermakesmonsters]

Devotion & Desire

Chapter Five

Plot summary : When you, a lone omega, move in across the hall from alpha Bucky Barnes, he knows that his life is about to get a lot more complicated, but he has no idea just how much you’re going to turn his life upside down. You’re both devoted to fixing your past mistakes, but will desire for something more get the better of you?

Pairing : Alpha!Bucky Barnes x Omega!Reader

Story Rating : R 

Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] Sex toy use, explicit smut and omega heat stuff. All chapters will contain the usual omegaverse and A/B/O tropes, and explicit smut. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story. 

Word Count : 6.1k

A/N : I'm not saying anything except enjoy 😅

CHAPTER ONE | CHAPTER TWO | CHAPTER THREE | CHAPTER FOUR

MASTER LIST

Chapter Five

Stuck somewhere between asleep and awake, you reached for him. You reached for the one thing in your life that felt stable, your one source of comfort.

Waking slowly, you realised that he wasn’t there, that you weren’t on the floor in his arms anymore. You were back in your makeshift nest, completely alone. He’d even pulled your tee shirt back onto your body.

Pain and discomfort mingled with feelings of abandonment and, before you could stop yourself, your hand was pressed over your mouth stifling your sobs. If the last few days had been bad, this was hell. Pain radiated from your abdomen, the cramps worse than ever, and your skin felt like it was melting. Your joints ached from the fever, and your eyes could barely focus as you tried to lift your head.

Bucky was gone.

You were alone.

(You always ended up alone.)

Rolling onto your side, you fought against yourself, desperately trying to stop the sobs that racked your body and left you gasping for breath.

You hated him more than ever in that moment. Not the Winter Soldier, not the man who’d killed your brother, but Bucky, the man who made you feel safe only to abandon you a few hours later.

The worst thought, the thing you couldn’t shake, was how soundly you’d slept in his arms, how easily you’d managed to drift off surrounded by the scent of his arousal. And you found yourself questioning how? How had you let it get so far? How had you allowed yourself to be so vulnerable with him?

The sobbing eventually subsided and you were able to think a little more clearly. Omega hormones. That was your excuse. Your hormones, your omega urges, they’d always been hard to control but, after years of suppressing your omega nature, now it was hitting you like a freight train. You tried to take slow, measured breaths, and tried to regain your rationality. 

The room spun wildly as you got to your feet, staggering forward, every step you took seemed to happen before your mind understood what your body was doing. You felt out of sync with yourself, like you were outside your own body. You weren’t even sure where you were going.

Bucky was nowhere to be found; the apartment was quiet and, again, you felt like you wanted to cry. 

The only sign that he was going to come back at some point was the bag with his clothes and his leather jacket, draped over the back of the sofa. 

Before your anger at him could stop you, you had his jacket in your hands, pressed to your face, inhaling him deeply. For the briefest of moments, his scent dulled the ache inside you and calmed your racing mind, but it didn’t last. It wasn’t enough.

Then, somehow, you found yourself back in your nest, the only evidence that you’d been up was his jacket and the rest of the clothes from his backpack scattered around you. Finally, your nest felt complete and you felt almost safe again. But it wasn’t the same sense of safety that you’d found in his arms.

There was no telling what it was about him, whether it was his scent or simply the fact that he had been the only alpha you’d had prolonged contact with since your heat had started, but it was clear to see that a connection had started to form between the two of you.

And you needed to put a stop to it.

The morning had taught you that you couldn’t trust him, couldn’t rely upon him. Anything else that you might have felt didn’t matter anymore. You just needed to survive the last few days of your heat without him.

Your hand pawed at your thigh, trying to deny yourself what you craved, knowing that it was going to keep getting worse and every time you gave into it only made you more needy. But it was no use, you couldn’t fight it.

You thrashed around, your fingers slipping into your panties, trying to find some relief but only finding more frustration. You were so far into your heat now that it was becoming impossible to manage, the pain and the fever demanding more than just your fingers, but it was all you had. Awful panted whines of desperation started spilling from your lips, your frustration only getting worse.

Your eyes closed tight as your fingers slipped into your slickened cunt and you tried to make it all stop, but it wasn’t working. Your desperate sounds only got worse as the tension continued to coil in your body, and you got so lost to it that you didn’t hear Bucky return to the apartment.

You didn’t notice he was back until you saw him standing in the doorway, a bag in hand. You pulled your fingers from your panties, trying to hide your frustration. He moved towards you without hesitation, placing the bag down on the nightstand and turning his full attention to you. Sitting on the bed beside you, he placed a hand on thigh and frowned as you flinched away from his touch.

“Do you need -”

“No,” you didn’t let him finish, not trusting yourself to be able to refuse if he said the words. “I’m fine, just - just leave me alone.”

“Really?” He said, barely hiding his irritation. “We’re back to this again? Why?”

All you could do was shake your head, indicating that you didn’t want to talk about it, but Bucky seemed to put the pieces together without your help.

“Because of last night? You’re gonna start getting passive aggressive again just because we fell asleep together?” His head shook as he spoke and you couldn’t tell if he was angry or frustrated with you.

“That’s not what it is,” you snapped back, wanting to keep pushing until he left you alone again.

“Then what?”

“I don’t need your help. I can handle this on my own now.”

“Fine,” he answered back just as sharply.

He stood, tugged his jacket from your nest and quickly pulled it on. It was too late to try and hide the rest of his clothes that you’d surrounded yourself with, all you could do was drop your gaze and try to ignore the shameful heat that was burning across your cheeks.

Bucky started moving towards the door, his jacket on, obviously planning on going out.

“Where are you going?” You dared to ask, a spark of worry inside you at the thought of driving him off completely.

“To see if I can find any leads on Rumlow so we don’t have to hide out anymore and I won’t have to put up with any more of your shit,” he answered without looking back. Was he hurt? Did your refusal to let him help actually hurt him? “Eat your breakfast.”

Before you could ask what he meant, he slammed the bedroom door shut behind him.

It took you a few moments to realise that the bag he’d placed on the nightstand had a take out box with waffles in, and your stomach dropped. He hadn’t abandoned you, he’d gone to get you breakfast.

Moments later, you heard the apartment door slam, and yet more unwanted sobs began to claw their way from within you.

The hours dragged and felt more like days, and the longer you were alone, the more you started to fear that he was never going to come back. Had something happened to him, or had he given up on you? (Had he left you there to die alone?)

Your fever only got worse, so much so that you thought about throwing yourself under the cold shower again, but you barely had the strength to sit up, let alone make it across the apartment to the bathroom.

Again and again, you found yourself with your fingers between your thighs, trying in vain to find some feeling of relief, but there was no to be found. Your vision blurred and you found yourself wanting to give up, to just lay back and let it claim you. You were so tired, so alone, and it was all your fault.

Everything was your fault.

Your fault for going after Bucky in the first place.

Your fault for making him leave.

Your fault for staying hidden while your brother was murdered.

Your fault for being a weak, pathetic omega.

When you finally heard someone enter the apartment, you tried desperately to scrub the tears from your eyes, ready to apologise to Bucky, ready to ask for help. But, when you saw his face, you found that the words wouldn’t come. He looked at you like you didn’t matter, like he’d shut down whatever part of him had dared to care about you, and lingered in the doorway like he couldn’t even stand to be near you anymore.

“Here,” he said, throwing a brown paper bag into your nest.

“What -” you started to ask but the question became irrelevant as you tipped the contents of the bag onto the bed.

Your cheeks, somehow, managed to grow hotter as you read the label on the box and took in the very graphic artwork. Heat-Busting Alpha Cock Dildo - an omega’s best friend, ready for use straight out of the box, modelled on real alphas. 

The embarrassment was short-lived and quickly became anger. It felt like a rejection, even though you’d been the one to tell him that you didn’t need his help anymore. But now that what you’d demanded was your reality, you ached and longed for him. Just looking at him had your thighs pressing together.

You made it worse by thinking about him buying it, picturing him taking it up to the register and explaining all about the poor little omega he was helping out. The person working the register probably looked at him like he was a saint, helping some weak, fragile omega that was so beneath him that he’d rather get her a toy than give her his own cock.

“Thank you,” you finally snapped, tone dripping sarcasm.

Bucky didn’t move, watching you as you tried not to writhe and shift your hips in desperation. And you held his gaze, trying to act defiant, to act like you didn’t feel like something inside of you was breaking.

“Are you planning on watching?” You finally asked, making a show of tearing the box open and getting a look at the toy inside.

He shrugged and it almost felt like he was daring you, like this was a test and he didn’t think you’d go through with it, like he thought you’d give in and beg for his help. Your whole body seemed to twitch at the thought of proving him wrong,  the burning that was consuming you only seeming to intensify the more you thought about it, and your stomach cramped and twisted itself in knots. You had to do something before the pain became unbearable.

You pulled the toy from the wrapping, too caught up in what you were about to do to spare a moment to roll your eyes at the sparkly pink silicone style he’d selected for you. You squirmed as you pushed your panties down past your knees before awkwardly kicking them off.

Reaching down between your thighs, you spread your folds while the other hand took the toy and positioned it against your slickened entrance, your eyes catching his for a split-second. You took a slow breath before starting to push it into yourself, whining at the way the bulbous tip stretched you. It took a couple of goes to slip it in past the tip, betraying how long it had been since you’d been fucked by an alpha. You moaned as you slowly started working the toy deeper, inserting it a couple of inches before pulling back and then pushing in a few inches more.

You caught his gaze for a moment before quickly looking away,

Slick ran down the toy and the more you took, the easier it became. Once you’d taken it all, you let your head drop back, your eyes closing. You held it for a few moments, trying to get used to the size of it before finally starting to slide it out again.

When you thought to look again, you realised that Bucky was gone, and you weren’t sure how you felt about it.

No, you told yourself, you didn’t need him. You could take care of this on your own.

But, as before with your fingers, you quickly started to struggle. It wasn’t helping, it wasn’t making you feel any better.

Your mind kept going back to him, your head filling with conflicting thoughts and making it impossible for you to come. Every time you got close, you found yourself wishing that he was there, that it was him inside you, filing and stretching you. You let out a needy and frustrated moan, unable to find any release no matter what you did.

It got worse, almost to the point you felt like you might die. Your vision blurred and you felt like you were drowning and burning at the same time, your whole body aching.

You hated yourself for it, but you couldn’t help but call out; “Bucky...”

There was no answer.

“Please, I - I need you...” you pleaded as tears formed in the corners of your eyes.

A few seconds later he was standing in the doorway, looking at you with a bemused expression.

“Oh, so you need me now?” He asked sarcastically, but the look on his face dropped as soon as you started to double up in pain. He quickly cleared the room to get to your side. “Shit, okay, mouse. Just relax.”

“I - I can’t -” you whimpered, toes and fingers curling in agony, eyes blinking back tears that you wanted to keep to yourself.

“It’s okay, don’t worry. I’ve got you.”

His hand was between your thighs in a heartbeat, taking hold of the toy and starting to fuck you with it. For a time, it seemed to do the trick; you felt the pressure swelling inside you, you felt yourself reaching the crest of that wave but, then, nothing...

It wasn’t enough anymore, your heat had become too severe and you weren’t sure that anything could help anymore. A sob shook your whole body, causing a clear look of distress on Bucky’s face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“I can’t -” you whined, still desperately shifting your hips against the toy, the pressure mounting inside you with no sign of relief driving you to make a needy plea. “I - I need more. I need you...”

“You want me?” His hand stilled, though your hips kept moving. “Are you sure?”

You nodded, though you couldn’t quite bring yourself to say the words again. Gods, you wanted him. Despite everything that told you that you shouldn’t, you wanted him.

Bucky moved from the edge of the bed, fumbling with his jeans, pushing them down along with his boxers, before quickly pulling off his shirt. You couldn’t stop your eyes from taking in the sight of him, his toned abs leading your eyes right down to -

Fuck.

His cock was already rock hard and standing to attention. You bit your lip, brazenly staring at it, already feeling breathless. It was just what you needed. He reached between your thighs, slowly sliding the toy from your trembling body. But all you could focus on was his cock.

“I don’t have any condoms,” he warned you.

Good, an inexplicable thought came to you unbidden. 

“It’s okay,” you said impatiently. “Please, Bucky... just do it...”

You looked up at him with pleading eyes, desperate for anything that would stop the pain. 

You didn’t try to stop him as he climbed onto the bed, instead your legs instinctively parted for him, mewling as the tip of his cock ran through your slickened folds. You trembled in anticipation as Bucky ground the length of his cock against your clit, and it wasn’t long until your hips were bucking and moving, eager for more.

But looking up and seeing him above you, his eyes bright with lust, staring down at you, made your stomach coil in a way you hadn’t been expecting.

“Wait,” you said, panting awkwardly, “not like this.”

Bucky froze, pulling back a fraction. “What’s wrong?”

Instead of answering him, you rolled over onto your stomach before clumsily lifting yourself up on your hands and knees, pressing yourself against him, grinding your ass into his hips. You presented yourself to him like an omega, wanting to make sure he understood that this was just about your heat and nothing else. His vibranium arm wrapped around your waist, supporting you, while he returned to teasing you with his cock, letting your slick coat him.

“Bucky...” you mewled, reaching between your thighs, trying to guide his cock inside you.

“It’s okay, mouse,” he groaned, “I got you.”

A moment later you felt him, your breath catching and lips parting as you felt that first nudge of his cock, his tip stretching you. His flesh hand gripped your hip, holding you completely still as he began to fill you, inch by inch, working his cock into you, gunting like he was barely holding himself back.

You cried out, arching your back and shifting your hips as you struggled to take all of him. The toy had helped prepare you, but Bucky felt even bigger. He took his time, obviously not wanting to cause you any discomfort as you slowly adjusted to him. Once he was buried inside of you, he stilled, taking a moment to catch his breath.

“I got so hard watching you try to take that toy,” he confessed quietly, groaning as you squirmed, trying to get comfortable despite feeling so full. “I wanted to know if you’d be able to handle me.”

A low and desperate whine spilled from you, your hindbrain and body both eager for him to move, for him to claim you.

“I can handle it,” you managed to tell him, defiant despite the omega in you wanting nothing more than to be dominated by an alpha.

A huff of laugher escaped him, his hold around your waist tightening.

“Oh really?”

“Yes, I -” you were stopped short by his hips snapping back and then thrusting forward.

The sudden movement would have caused you to spill forward if it hadn’t been for his tight hold on you, keeping you in place so he could use you as he saw fit. Finally your mind turned quiet and you were able to lose yourself in the sensations he was creating as he fucked you, hard.

Without you telling him, Bucky seemed to know exactly what you needed. He forced gasps and moans from you with every thrust, paying close attention to what made you moan the loudest, every part the attentive alpha doing what he could to satisfy his omega.

You couldn’t even bring yourself to remember that you weren’t his omega because, at that moment, it really didn’t matter. 

He pulled your first orgasm from you easily. All it took was a few rough shifts of his hips to have you keening and trembling, completely overwhelmed. But you both knew it wasn’t enough, not by a long shot.

Bucky leaned down over you, his body a cage that you had no desire to ever escape from, his lips on the back of your neck as he groaned, barely even sounding out of breath, while you panted and trembled. The scrape of his dogtags against your back was a constant reminder that it was Bucky fucking you and driving you insane. 

His thrusts turned fast and shallow, only fucking the deepest parts of you, in a way that had you punctuating every ragged breath with a loud moan. Your whole body shook as you felt his tip kiss your cervix, filling you in a way that no man ever had.

You bit your lip to keep yourself from calling his name or something far worse. The last scrap of your sanity was reserved for making sure you didn’t call him alpha.

He quickly forced you through another orgasm and, finally, you felt some of the tension in your abdomen start to ease off. It was working. This was what you’d needed all along. 

As you came, he moved you, lifting himself onto his knees and pulling you on to his lap.

“Fuck-fuck-fuck...” you moaned over and over, trembling as he pulled your back against his chest and drove his cock up into you.

The change of angle was almost too much for you and Bucky seemed to be enjoying just how eager you were. His vibranium hand moved down to tease your clit while the other moved to your chest, his fingers playing with the hardened peaks of your nipples. Everything was Bucky and you felt like you were going to lose your mind.

He groaned in your ear with each thrust, as if this was for his pleasure and not your benefit. (Not that you had the focus to even think about why Bucky was doing any of it.)

His nose pressed to your neck again, lips brushing over your gland as he inhaled your scent.

“You smell so good, like toasted marshmallows and honeycomb, I could eat you...” he groaned.

It was the first time he’d ever really acknowledged your scent and the way he groaned sent a shiver down your spine. You’d never felt more wanted for who you were.

His tongue dragged over the length of your gland causing you to shudder and come again, so hard this time that you felt slick running down your thighs and onto his lap. It was too much but, at the same time, not enough. The pain was becoming a distant memory, and all that existed was Bucky.

He let go of you, allowing you to fall forward onto your stomach, face burying itself in the pillows. Bucky finally slowed down, fucking you with rough, but measured thrusts, letting you really feel how deep he was. And all you could do was submit to the blissful feeling he was creating inside you.

“I’m close, mouse,” he groaned, wanting to give you a choice on how it would end.

You trembled and fluttered around his cock at the thought of him filling you, claiming you. You hated how much you wanted it, how desperate your heat was making you for a man you were so uncertain of. And as you felt the tip of his cock kiss your cervix again, you almost moaned yes, almost begged him to fuck you full.

Finally, common sense won through.

“Pull out,” you gasped, “I'm not -”

Another orgasm hit seemingly from nowhere. The sudden clench of your cunt around him had Bucky barely managing to pull out in time. You heard him groan but you didn't have the strength to lift your head and look as you felt his cum spurt across your ass and back.

A few seconds later you felt the mattress shift as he stood and left the room. And suddenly, you felt abandoned, you felt used, like he’d gotten what he wanted from you and, now, he was just going to leave you. The big, strong alpha had fucked the pathetic little omega, and now he was done with you.

It shouldn’t have upset you, it shouldn’t have made you feel that longing ache in the pit of your stomach, but it did. 

You didn’t want him to go.

You didn’t want to be alone, you didn’t want to have to look after yourself anymore.

Your body shuddered as you fought against the urge to cry, hating him all the more for making you feel that way; weak, pathetic and unwanted. You felt rejected and more alone than you had in years. You’d let yourself believe that maybe there could be something more to him, that maybe Bucky wasn’t just the Winter Soldier 

But then you heard movement and felt the tender press of a damp cloth on your skin, gently cleaning you. He hadn’t left you. He was still taking care of you, and that thought broke something inside of you.

There was no holding it back; you pressed your face into the pillow as you softly started to cry. If Bucky knew what was happening, he didn’t say anything, he just continued to clean you.

Then you felt the mattress dip further, and the pillow shifted slightly beneath your head. Instead of pulling away, instead of creating distance like he normally did after such intimate moments with you, Bucky sat beside you on the bed. His hand started to tenderly stroke your hair but, still, he didn’t say anything.

Minutes passed - or maybe it was hours, you honestly couldn’t say - and he remained at your side, taking care of you despite everything you’d done to him, everything you’d said. It didn’t make sense, you didn’t understand him. And you didn’t understand yourself when you were with him.

When your tears had finally dried up, you rolled onto your side to face him, realising that he was still mostly naked, save for his boxers.

You didn’t know what to say or how to feel, all you knew was that you were glad that he hadn’t left you.

Bucky spoke first, though you were sure it was only to fill the silence before it became more uncomfortable.

“I can get you clean sheets if you -”

“No,” you answered quickly, too quickly. The scent of your coupling was all over the sheets now and you wanted it to stay that way, you wanted to stay wrapped up in the scent of his arousal mingled with your own. “It’s fine.”

Silence fell again for a few moments and you were content to just relax, knowing that the peace wouldn’t last. Soon enough the pain would start again and, now that you’d given in, you knew that the only way to deal with your heat from now on would be letting him fuck you.

“You want to talk about it?” He asked reluctantly.

“About what?”

You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him, suddenly feeling hyper-aware of the fact you’d had sex with him and could remember every second of it, down to the way he’d sounded as he’d groaned in your ear. Was that what he wanted to talk about?

“About earlier, this morning,” Bucky clarified, falling silent again for a couple of seconds, “about why you were upset with me.

All you could do was shake your head, knowing you couldn’t explain it because you didn’t understand it yourself. You’d been angry and distraught, you’d felt abandoned and rejected by a man you didn’t even want.

“I know this is -” he blew out his cheeks, struggling to find the words “- complicated, but I’m here and I -”

“You weren’t here,” you muttered quietly.

“What?”

“This morning... you weren’t here...”

“Is that why -”

Before he could finish, you turned away from him, rolling onto your side to face the wall, feeling too vulnerable and confused to explain it. You took a slow breath, tried to calm your racing emotions, but it was too late. After everything you’d just done, you felt more lost than ever.

Another quiet followed, spanning a couple of minutes.

“I didn’t think you’d want me around when you woke up,” he said softly. Bucky reached for you, but he barely allowed his hand to graze your shoulder before pulling it back. “And after last night, I...”

He trailed off, leaving the thought unspoken, but you needed to know. You needed to know that this was all affecting him just as much as it was affecting you. So, when he didn’t offer an answer, you decided to prompt him.

“What?”

Bucky sighed again. “I don’t like people seeing me like that.”

It dawned on you that you weren’t the only one with reasons to feel vulnerable. You’d spent the last few days willfully ignoring everything that Bucky had been through and how he might feel about your current situation. In your desire to punish him, to hate him, you’d dehumanised him and disregarded his emotions. 

Remembering the previous night and how he’d been thrashing on the floor, letting out terrible gasps and mutters, you felt your stomach knot, and the lines between you continued to blur.

“It looked like it was a bad one,” you said softly, not knowing what else to say.

“It was,” Bucky answered quietly, surprising you with his honesty. “They all are.”

Despite knowing you had no right to ask, you couldn’t help yourself; “what was it about?”

Bucky was silent. The mattress dipped behind you as he turned and placed his feet on the floor. You didn’t turn to look, not sure you could handle the inevitable sight of him leaving you.

But he didn’t leave. In fact he made no sign of even wanting to leave.

“I get... flashes when I’m sleeping. Memories, things I half-remember. Things Hydra tried to scrub from my mind,” he tried to explain, a cold detachment slipping into his tone, like he was trying to distance himself from it. “I remember everything but sometimes, like with your brother, it’s scrambled, like a book that’s had its pages torn out and rearranged. It’s all still there but some parts are more buried than others.”

You stayed silent, remembering how you’d screamed at him, telling him he should remember your brother, and you felt a deep sense of shame welling inside you as Bucky continued.

“When I dream, it’s more lucid. I don’t always know exactly what I’m seeing, but I know it’s me, that it’s things I did,” he said, leaning forward and lowering his head into his hands. “I can see myself doing terrible things, but I can’t stop myself.” 

Finally you moved, forcing yourself to turn and look at him, staring at his back, not sure what you could say or do. When you said nothing, Bucky finally stood.

“I’ll get you something to eat.” And, with that, he was gone.

You didn’t have the time or the heart to tell him that the waffles he’d got you for breakfast were still in the box on the nightstand, or that you didn’t feel like you could eat. Instead, you let him go, understanding it was more for him than for you; he wanted some space, wanted to feel like he was doing something to help.

When he came back, he brought with him a bowl of Cookie Crunch cereal, as if he knew without you needing to tell him that you couldn’t eat much more than that.

He left you alone to eat, but he didn’t stay gone for long. He took to checking on you every half an hour or so, pressing his hand to your forehead to gauge your temperature, before making you take a drink of water, and pressing the cold washcloth to your face.

The pain was more manageable than the fever, so you didn’t ask Bucky for his help again and he didn’t offer it. Both of you seemed to realise that something had changed in your dynamic, and neither wanted to ruin the strange calm you’d managed to create. Instead, Bucky tried to help you in other ways.

“You need to try and take your mind off it,” he told you, sitting beside you on the bed.

“Oh, yeah, I’ll just pretend that it doesn’t feel like my insides are being shredded,” you groaned sarcastically.

“Just try to slow your breathing,” he continued, ignoring your attitude and the way you huffed when he pulled you closer to him. “Count back from one hundred and take a breath on every fifth number.”

“What are you? The Count from Sesame Street?” You grumbled, somehow ending up with your head against his chest. 

“The what?”

“... nevermind.”

Some of the tension started to leave you the moment he started stroking your hair, and it wasn’t long before you started to use his little trick, quickly finding that you were so busy concentrating on counting and breathing, that you didn’t notice the pain as much. 

You also didn’t notice how you’d manage to slip down his body and end up with your head in his lap.

“Thank you,” you reluctantly muttered, exhausted but feeling a little bit better.

“I might not know what it’s like to suffer through a heat, but I know about pain...”

“Your arm?” You asked cautiously.

“No, not the arm...”

Clearly, Bucky didn’t want to talk about it and, normally, you might have respected that, but you needed the distraction and, more than that, you needed to understand the man who was threatening to turn your whole existence upside down.

“Then what?”

He huffed another sigh, looking down at you and finding your eyes staring back as you fought against the exhaustion.

“Whenever I got back from a mission, when Hydra used to wipe my mind...” he shook his head. “It wasn’t a pleasant process. 

You felt a twinge of sympathy as you slowly started to realise how many years of pain and suffering he must have been through; he had been the Winter Soldier for decades, been sent on countless missions. He’d had his memory scrubbed over and over again - so many times, it was a wonder that there was anything left of him.

But, beneath that, there was anger. No longer directed at Bucky, but at Hydra. Your brother deserved to be something more than a memory that they wiped away.

Given everything he’d said, everything you’d witnessed, you weren’t sure you could be angry at Bucky anymore, and you were almost certain that you didn’t wish him any harm. At least, no more than you’d already caused.

“What you said the other day, about me hurting you...” you muttered, now desperately fighting against sleep.

“We don’t have to talk about that,” he said, the hand stroking your hair falling still for a moment before resuming, trying to lull you to sleep.

“Did I really hurt you?”

“... yeah.”

Your eyes closed and you let out a sigh of your own. It didn’t make sense and a part of you knew you should let the conversation drop, but you couldn’t. You needed to know.

“Why?”

“Seriously?” Bucky protested, clearly not wanting to tell you.

Looking up, you caught an unsettled look on his face. His gaze was fixed on the door, as if he was thinking about leaving to avoid answering, but he didn’t move.

“Was it because you thought you were going to get to claim an omega?”

You regretted the comment for how crass it sounded the moment it left your lips, but it was the only thought that really made any sense. You didn’t think that you’d hurt him, just left him feeling disappointed, his alpha pride wounded.

“What?” He almost sounded offended. “No, I just - I liked spending time with you. I don’t exactly get that with a lot of people.”

“So you only liked me when you thought I was some docile little omega?”

You couldn’t decide whether you were more upset or offended by the thought, believing that he’d only liked you when you were a pathetic and muted version of yourself, when you’d been pretending to be some stereotype of an omega.

“No,” he shot back without hesitation, “that’s not what I’m saying. The night at the bar - when you were joking and dancing and having fun - that’s what I liked.”

“That’s not me.”

It had never been you.

“I think it is,” he said softly, “or, I think it could be.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“If you stopped running and expecting the worst all the time, if you let people care about you, I think you could be happy.”

“How would you know?” You answered back, dropping your gaze, hating feeling like you were under a microscope.

“Because I’m trying to do the same thing,” Bucky confessed. “I get that it’s not easy, and you’ve been through a lot... I even understand if you still want to kill me at the end of this, but it doesn’t mean you should just close yourself off to people who want to care about you.”

You didn’t have an answer for any of that and you thoroughly regretted even starting the conversation. So, you fell silent and closed your eyes, feigning being asleep until exhaustion claimed you.

End Note : Hopefully this continues to maintain just the right plot to smut ratio. I'm still struggling with the laggy bluetooth keyboard but I think I caught most of the typos. Also I'm sorry about the dildo scene but picturing Bucky buying a dildo just made me laugh for some reason.

As always, reblogs/comments/likes/asks are always appreciated. Thanks so much for reading, hope you have a great day!

If you'd like to be tagged in future chapters, let me know!

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@skittslackoffilter @mcira

[thetorturedbuckydepartment]

chapter two: the arrival

pairing: Bucky barnes x plus-sized!SHIElD!reader

masterlist

summary: being a SHIELD agent, you have a knack for analysing people, particularly when it comes to attraction. you have everyone figured out, sorted away into the boxes you've created. But there's one man you can never seem to figure out, the very bane of your existence -- Bucky Barnes. On the field, he is a saint, helping you dodge bullets and taking knife wounds in your name. Around the building? Public menace number one, always poised to insult or to spar with you.

After being sent on a 6-month-long torture-cum-vacation with the very man, could all this change? Could you finally figure out what has been bubbling beneath the surface for years between the two of you, the juggernaut that you know you cannot stop?

warnings:  language, heavy mentions of sex, brief and non-specific mentions of Bucky’s past

word count: 2.9k

taglist: @cjand10 @mcira

PREVIOUS PART

A/N: so excited for you guys to read! sorry ive been MIA recently -- the first half of august will be extremely stressful for me as I have my drivers theory test on the 10th, then I find out if I get into uni on the 15th, hopefully all goes well but you never know!! so for that reason, I haven't been able to write much since posting the first chapter, so updates might be every 2 weeks or so! im so sorry </3, but as always, please let me know how you're finding the story!!!!

The wedding band offers you a strange comfort as you twist it around and around your fingers, staring out of the window of the private jet. It’s a simple golden band, with your initials and Bucky’s engraved onto the inner edge. You hate it, but are too ashamed to vocalise it. It was less than a week ago that you were sobbing on the floor about pretending to be married, and now the wedding band, his initials rubbing against your skin on the inside of it gives you solace?

Bucky notices, because of course he does. He moves to sit directly in front of you, and you turn to him. Officially, the two of you are on the clock now, and so you keep your face impassive, instead of scowling or staring angrily at him. He leans back in his seat, shoving his hands into the dark leather jacket you’re all too familiar with, slouching. He’s wearing jeans the same colour as his eyes, and a red henley that’s just peeking through the top of the jacket. Average, suburban white guy, with a bit of New York flair. 

“You’ve been avoiding me all week.” He states simply, like it’s the most abhorrent fact he’s ever had the displeasure of narrating. You nod, trying your best to not let a snarky remark sneak past your lips, currently coloured in a sheer red. 

“I don’t want to get sick of you too soon. It’s the longest we’ve ever been on any mission. You remember Bucharest, right? How we were almost at each other’s throats in two weeks, and because of us poor Sam spent a week in the medbay? I don’t want that to happen again.” He glances down at the memory, as if humiliated by the outcome of that mission. You know you are — you still check Sam’s hands to see if he’s still healing. You assume he’s done with talking to you and turn to stare back out the window, admiring the green fields and fluffy clouds.

“I understand. But that means we haven’t talked about anything. Like our cover story, how I proposed. Or how affectionate we’re going to be with each other.” 

“Well, you’re still going as James Barnes, aren’t you?” Realistically, you should’ve said The Winter Soldier. That’s what you mean, and he knows that. But you can’t bring yourself to say it, to remind him of everything he’s trying to escape from. It seemed to be an unspoken boundary between the two of you, that you’ll never throw that title in his face, especially when you’ve seen the way he retracts from society and begins to shake in his seat at those three words, regardless of who uses them. His past, before you knew him, you decide to leave untouched. You couldn’t live with yourself if you belittled him and shamed him for things that happened to him, things that he was never in control of.

You’ve read the case files. You know the atrocities. You can’t do that to him. Even if he chose to cross that line, you can’t wound him in such a way, especially not for petty revenge. You want to annoy him, yes, but you don’t want him to truly ache irrevocably because of you. For some reason, you can’t bring yourself to do that to him.

“Yes. And you’re still going as you?” You nod, gears turning in your head.

“We can say we met in Wakanda, and we were friends for 5 years. You were hopelessly in love with me the whole time, obviously. But I only started seeing you as more than a friend after… we went to a friend’s wedding together, and I didn’t have a partner so I dragged you along with me. When they exchanged their wedding vows, I realised that what you and I had was special, and that you’re ridiculously handsome. And the rest is history.” You shrug, hating that you’ll have to admit to his stupid, pretty face that he has a stupid pretty face.

“How’d you come up with that? You don’t really seem the romance type…”

You think for a moment, reabsorbing the insult that you almost fire at him. Is he implying that you’re a slut, again?

“Just because I’ve never been serious about anyone before, doesn’t mean I’m a heartless monster, James. I’ve read books, and seen TV shows. I prefer romance, to remind myself that somehow, sometimes, men can be at least decent.” Your eyes bore into his then, silently expressing your anger. “And I’d really appreciate it if half of your insults toward me aren’t slutshaming. Keep it to yourself.” You can’t help it.

His eyebrows furrow, and somehow he looks even sexier. God, you hate how your sexual attraction toward him peaks when he’s civil with you. “What? I’ve never…”

“Yes you have, don’t lie. Almost every other sentence you say to me, you mention me sleeping around. Now, I don’t give a fuck what you think, but it’s beginning to get annoying. You wanna get your marks up? Find some new material.”

“Butterscotch, no. That’s—That’s not what I mean. You’re the only person I’m ever around who’s had so much sex, but it’s not a bad thing. Definitely not a bad thing. It just genuinely seems to me that whenever I see you, you’re always planning to hook up with someone. That’s why. I’m not shaming you for having sex, do whatever the fuck you want. I’m sorry if I made it seem otherwise, or if that’s why you hate me.” You’re constantly shifting between staring out the window, and at him, but when he apologises you can’t help but give yourself whiplash, wondering if he’s joking.

A million more questions circle your mind, and your anger flares up before you can stop it. You stand up, walking over to where he sits. He watches your face, as you grip the armrests and lean down so you’re uncomfortably close to him. He gets flustered so quickly, it’s another one of your favourite weaknesses of his to exploit. “You think that’s why I hate you? I hate you, because you’re an arrogant, self-centred bitch, who’s only ever treated me like shit.” In truth, he’s only arrogant and self-centred when it comes to you. To everyone else, he’s as sweet and humble as they come, and that’s what bothers you the most. 

That he’s chosen to have some personal vendetta against you from the very first night he met you, when you tried to be kind. You greeted him, smiled at him, bought him a vinyl player and limited edition vinyls from the 40s in mint condition for his fucking birthday, and all he ever was, was cruel to you. He scowled, he turned away from you. He all but threw your thoughtful gift across the room and fled from the birthday party.

That was your breaking point, when you decided that he’s not worth it. At first, you gave him the benefit of the doubt. He was fresh out of Wakanda at the time, and you thought that maybe he was just having trouble reintegrating into society, what with the hell he’d been through. But then, you noticed the way he spoke to Nat with a wide smile on his face, how he loved to laugh with the other agents, and you noticed it was just you that he was still closed-off and horrid to. That’s when you began to be cruel, began to insult him and scowl right back, mirroring his expressions 

You’d never done it before then, but it felt so natural, so deserved. And then it had become second nature, as easy as blinking, or finding someone new to sleep with. It’s even more embarrassing to admit that you’d found yourself, for the first time, having strong and true romantic feelings for someone, and then he shut you down like that. How could you not? With a face like that, and an unwavering passion in those cobalt eyes, how could you not form some semblance of attachment? 

You briefly remember the way you’d acted around him, like a giggling schoolgirl who’s just dipped her toes into the dating world. How naive you had been, how foolish. It all just makes you grimace now, fuelling the flames of your hatred all that much more.

He searches your eyes, trying to dig beneath all the malice. As if you’d let him. He must know that to poke the bear is futile at this stage, because he decides to change the topic.

“And what about me proposing? How long have we been married? Where did we go on our honeymoon?” Your faces are so close…if he were half a decent person you wouldn’t leave any room for him to even breathe at this current second.

“Don’t tell me I’m gonna carry all the braincells on this mission, Barnes.” You retreat back to your seat, slumping over yourself, trying to ignore all of the bitter memories that have just been dragged to the forefront of your mind. 

A brief silence descends over the two of you, and you swivel your attention once again to the landscape outside, buckling your seatbelt as the flight attendant announces that you’re about to land.

“One day, I asked you over to my apartment, on our three year anniversary. December 22nd. I cooked you your favourite meal, chicken biryani with that raita that you like, and red velvet cake for dessert. It was a candlelit dinner in my tiny apartment, with a red tablecloth the same colour as your dress. After the dinner I asked you to marry me, reciting stanzas and stanzas of prose about how beautiful and amazing you are, and how in love with you I am. Then, we made love until dawn, obviously.” 

A smile graces your face at his last words, at how innocent he appears when he refers to having sex as making love. The sentiment is sweet.

His seeming innocence catches you off guard at times — he’s been amongst all the agents and Avengers for eight years now, as opposed to your 13. The agents are always throwing themselves at him, especially those not into women, at all. You’ve often assumed he hooks up with most of them, seeing as Steve’s often recounted stories of what a charmer he was back in the 40s. And when he’s nice, you doubt anyone could resist him.

So why does he seem so new and inexperienced to most things? Another mystery you can’t be asked to solve.

“God, you’re just dying to have sex with me, aren’t you?” You tease, letting your grin  mould into something a little more sadistic, indicating that the thick, putrid air of a few minutes ago has passed.

He rolls his eyes. “Don’t flatter yourself, the story pretty much requires it.”

You nod in mockery. “Uh huh, of course. You pervert, we’re not going to tell anyone that. The idea of premarital sex will probably give half the kids in those suburbs a heart attack.” His eyes rake up and down your figure, and you give him your most salacious grin. You usually reserve it for men across the bar, when you catch them checking you out. It’s reserved for inviting them over for casual conversation and bathroom sex.

On Bucky? It flusters him to hell and back when he’s on the receiving end of it. Just like it is right now, as he tries desperately to hide the blush that’s spreading quickly across his cheeks. He swallows, and you watch his Adam’s apple bob against his throat in an almost predatory manner.

It’s in moments like these you’ve often thought about hate sex. Specifically with Bucky, about what it would be like to pull on his hair, to boss him around like you usually enjoy to. Would he listen to you? Or would he bark orders of his own at you, gripping at every inch of you desperately? But you’re scared, because he’s the first person to ever make you want to pursue them romantically, and you’re scared all the hate will melt away with every gentle yet scorching touch, leaving you vulnerable.

You hate being vulnerable.

“We’ve only been married a month, and we went to Spain for our honeymoon. We just got back two weeks ago to finish packing.” He completes, and it seems simple enough. You notice how his voice shakes ever so slightly, still influenced by the way you look at him, and the way he refuses to make eye contact. 

“Sounds good. We’ll stick with that then.” You offer, not bothering to look at him twice as you leave the jet and step into the family sedan that Bucky’ll be driving.

You sigh as you sink into the passenger seat in a car that smells too clean, staring out the window as if bored. You wonder if either of you will be able to not kill the other in these six months.

In your mind, you either fuck or fight it out. There’s no other way you’re emerging. 

You wonder which option he’d choose, studying him as he settles in beside you, so close that you can smell his cologne. He’s taken off his leather jacket and shoved it to the backseat, exposing his arms and—his left arm is no longer metal.

He catches you staring — he’s always looking for an excuse to stare at you. “Fury handed it to me after the initial briefing. It fits over my arm like a second skin, so it looks normal. I’m supposed to be trying to get back that normal life, remember? Fury said it’ll help disillusion and distance me from The Winter Soldier in these civilian’s minds.” Somehow, it sends a pang through your heart, still, at the way he’s trying to not lose his shit and start crying at even the thought that they’ll still see him as an empty weapon, a vessel for unimaginable evil. You soften.

“Here, let me drive — you just learned what a car was, like, six months ago. Plus it’s manual. I know Steve only let you learn automatic. Come on, stop being a bitch and switch with me.” You’re goading him, holding out your hand for the keys as he blindly stares at the console, trying to process how you know that fact about him. 

Steve and you are close, best friends even. That’s why. He turns off the engine and does as he’s told, mind probably currently too occupied with awful memories to register you’re being soft with him.

As you settle into the driver’s seat, adjusting the mirrors as he stares down into his lap. “Besides, when you walk in there unarmed and without a murderous look on your face, they’ll know, James. It’s been years.” Your tone is too gentle, too gentle considering your history. But you can’t help yourself, and you let your hand gently touch his arm even though he won’t feel it. He looks up, and you see his eyes brimming with tears.

“But what if it doesn’t work? What if they see right through me?” His voice is so small, unlike any tone he’s ever taken with you.

“It will. It will work, they won’t see right through you. If they know who you are, you know they followed your trial, your rehab in Wakanda. They know you were pardoned. And they’ll know when you treat all the kids with respect, because you’re good with them. When you help the seniors cross the road, when you help the sexy neighbour with her groceries. They’ll know, because you’re good. You have a good heart, and you treat almost everyone you know with nothing but love and affection. Just because I’m not on the receiving end of it, doesn’t mean I can’t see that. Trust your gut, James. It’ll all be fine. And if I can pull off being in love with you, they’ll definitely see it too. I’ll sing your praises to everyone in town, I’ll do everything to convince them if I have to. Because that’s the only way our cover will work. This is official business, James. This isn’t you and me around the Tower, or sparring in the gym. Just trust me here, okay?” You don’t know why you’re sympathetic, you don’t know why you care. You don’t know why you’re saying all of these things like you’re falling in love with him, all you know if that he’s falling apart and you have to try and stop it.

You have to try and be there for him, gripping his hand between both of yours, trying to offer a physical reminder that he’s in the car with you, not back in that horrid lab or in the sterile courtroom as some bald, red-faced lawyer tries to write him off as the most heinous cretin to disgrace this planet. You look at him and he looks at you and the tension is almost palpable, like you could cut it with a knife. You have no idea what’s happening to you.

“Okay.” He says quietly, his thumb stroking the side of your hands. Sam beeps the horn behind you, him and Steve posing as the movers and carriers you and James have hired. 

It startles you out of the moment, reminding you of your rapid heart, beating so fervently against the jail of your ribs that you feel it in your fingertips. You turn to the road ahead, signalling to the PARKER PACKERS AND MOVERS truck towing behind you. You swallow, hopefully taking any softness for Bucky along with it.

It’s going to be a long six months.

NEXT PART

[delicatebarness]

i think he knows | chapter nine

Summary: As the sneaking continues, some secrets are revealed.

Warnings: Two perspectives are used. A few uses of Y/N. A lot of dialogue between multiple characters. Mentions/Implied Underage Sex. Our girlie is sad again.

Word Count: 1498

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A/N: I wrote this chapter while sitting in a van watching big sweaty men run around with guns (all I pictured all day was winter soldier) 🤤 I edited once I got home and had calmed myself down. 🙈

Tags: @bigtreefest | @caplanbuckybarnes | @angelbabyyy99 | @mega-kittyglitter-1 | @cjand10 | @armystay89 | @itvy5601 |

Bucky's words hung in the air, it prompted a sense of anticipation. You nodded as meeting his gaze, both curiosity and concern rushed through you.

"What is it?" you asked softly, as the gravity of his tone set in.

Taking a deep breath, he reached out to take your hand in his. "I know this isn't ideal," he started, looking down at your hand rather than into your eyes he began to rub circles against your skin.

"Us, um, sneaking around, keeping this hidden." You listened intently, trying to ignore the knot forming in your stomach.

"But," he continued, his gaze found its way back to yours. "I also know that being with you is worth it." His vulnerability took you by surprise, warming your heart. "I want to make this work."

With a small smile, you squeezed his hand, silently giving him the reassurance he needed to tell you what was on his mind. 

~

"What are we doing here?" Peter asked while looking up at the 'Stark's Motor's' sign above the rundown car and bike garage. "You know this is Tony Stark's family's business right? Tony Stark as in Bucky Barnes' friend?" Wanda had been curious about the tension between the two groups of friends, she sensed that it was deeper than simply, different personalities.

"Can I help you with something?" Tony asked as he looked Peter and Wanda up and down. They seemed familiar to him but he couldn't quite place them. Wanda looked around Tony, noticing the rest of the group gathered on sofas behind him.

Just as she expected, Bucky Barnes, for being the so-called 'leader' of the group, wasn't to be seen.

"We know about the bets," Wanda stated, gaining the attention of the whole group. The smirks that found their way to their faces proved to Wanda and Peter that the rumors were true. Concern for their friend became evident between them.

"What bets?" Natasha Romanoff questioned them, her tone guarded.

"When you bet each other on how far you can get with someone," Peter interjected before Wanda could, his voice rushed.

"What about them? You want in or something?" Loki, Peter recognized as the younger brother of Thor, questioned with a mischievous smile. He noticed that he was the only one of the gang who would ever show their face to the game.

"No," Wanda began to make her way around the service counter, moving closer to the group of friends. "We want you to tell us what our friend did to deserve being a part of your games," she demanded, standing her ground.

Natasha rolled her eyes before standing up, closing the distance between herself and Wanda in an attempt to intimidate her. "Who's your friend?" she asked curiously while crossing her arms over her chest.

"Y/N Rogers," Peter answered for Wanda, she was intensely looking up at Natasha with furrowed brows. "Steve Rogers' little sister." A silence surrounded the garage at the mention of Rogers.

"She's been on the off-limits list for, what, two years now?" Peter Quill spoke up while looking around the group of his friends. The worst 'bad boy' in the group had, barely got into any trouble, and wasn't mischievous; he just liked to tell jokes and wear a red leather jacket.

"What's the off-limits list?" They asked Quill simultaneously, snapping their heads in his direction. Catching the moment Stark punched him in the arm, he had said too much. 

Sighing, Natasha seemingly began to relax more around the other students, going back to where she had previously been sitting. “The list of people we, under no circumstances, are allowed to bet on,” she explained, her voice still hinting at the annoyance the pair was causing. “She’s been on that list since her first day of freshman year?” she continued, looking around at her friends to confirm the amount of time. They all nodded in agreement. 

“Too bad the same couldn’t have been said for her brother,” a sense of amusement in Stark’s voice as he spoke under his breath. 

“Oh yeah, Natasha lost Buck some real cash on that one.” Quill laughed before taking a drink from the bottle he’d been nursing since Wanda and Peter arrived. 

Wanda and Peter shot each other a glance, a silent conversation of understanding happening between them. As they exchanged the silent vow to uncover more, they turned about to the group, knowing they were diving into dangerous waters. Bucky and his friends were the most feared pack in the school, only Steve and his friends weren’t worried about getting on their bad side. Even then, a few of them still watched their backs.

“We need to know everything,” Wanda exclaimed, causing the group to bring their attention back to the younger peers. 

Natasha’s eyes narrowed, but there was a slight hint of respect for the girl. “You two don’t know when to quit, do you?” she muttered under her breath. Ignoring Natasha’s remark, the two friends stood their ground. Not moving until someone talked. 

~

Bucky hesitated for a moment, struggling to find the right words. Taking a deep breath, his heart pounded. “Back in freshman year, I… I made a bet with Natasha,” he admitted. 

Your brow furrowed with confusion, “What kind of bet?” You asked, voice trembling slightly, you felt like you already knew the answer. Hearing it aloud, you feared it would make it real. 

His gaze dropped from yours as he swallowed hard, “I bet that she couldn’t sleep with Steve,” he confessed, your hand dropped from him as your body went into a state of shock. Your mind went back to the night before, how he reassured you that you weren’t a part of it. You remember now that he never denied the fact that they do make bets. “I didn’t think she would do it, Y/N,” he looked up, his eyes filled with remorse as he called you by your name rather than his nickname for you. 

“Why?” you whispered, your voice barely audible over your heart pounding. “If you didn’t think she would, why did you?”

“We were freshmen, we were just having fun,” he sighed, trying to defend himself and the friends he saw as family. “He was an easy target back, a try-hard, it was supposed to be a joke,” he ran a hand through his hair, as he rushed his words. 

The weight of his confession sank into your bones. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Disbelief surged through you, you couldn’t process everything at once. His reasoning only added to the turmoil swirling inside. 

There was a silence settling between you, your breathing and the background noise for the diner was the only sound. The image of Steve, oblivious to the wager placed on him, added another layer of hurt. 

You finally found your voice, it trembled as you held back tears. Not only were you hurting for your brother but, you couldn’t help shake the feeling that Bucky was lying about you. “How could you?” you questioned.

“I know I messed up,” Bucky’s voice softened, his hand reaching out as if to bridge the growing distance. “I mean, it’s most likely the main reason he wants me nowhere near you,” his words trailed off, and you turned away. 

You looked everywhere but in Bucky’s direction, afraid of the tears threatening to spill. “I’m guessing she then discarded him like he never mattered?” you asked, recounting the warning Steve had given you about Bucky and his friends. 

Another sigh from Bucky. “After everything, Steve caught feelings for her but it was just a game to her so she ignored him and has since,” he explained as he played with the straw in his milkshake glass. “It wasn’t until a couple of months later that he found out it was a bet, a bet that I started,” he began mumbling to himself about wishing he had a smoke or a drink before continuing. “We’ve never been okay since, which I understand on some level, but, he came out stronger I guess,” the confused look behind your teary eyes made his heart clench. “That was when he suddenly gained muscle and became the star athlete he is today.” 

“I don’t know what to say,” you admitted, you struggled to hear it yourself as you tried to find the words. 

Bucky nodded, he understood that telling you would have been painful. He saw the amount of compassion and empathy you carried in your heart, he knew it was risky for him to tell you the truth. He wished he could tell you, we fought once over nothing but stupid boy stuff, but, he couldn’t.

“I understand,” he replied softly, his head dropped landing his gaze on the table between you. “I’m sorry I hurt you, and Steve. I just, I don’t want there to be secrets between us as well.” Even though your heart ached for your brother and Bucky’s confession, you offered him a small nod.

- - -

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[malum-forev]

Hi, for the bingo thingy, can you use “Can you stay?” for a chapter 3 of the Co-parenting ex husband Bucky fic? 😜🙈 (if you turn that into a sad ending again, I’ll ugly cry. 😅😘)

the wait is finally oveeerrr. I didn't expect to write this but it quickly turned into my favorite piece! Thank you for the love (especially after I wrote two sad parts loooolll)

Here it is! and you can find Pt 1 Here and Pt 2 here!

*Gif by @rainbowkisses31

(Y/n) crossed her arms and leaned her head back on the wall, waiting for the principal’s door to open. She couldn’t believe this, Peanut was in kindergarten for fucks sake! How was the principal already calling her in. A couple of teachers had given (Y/n) a heads up, to control the situation before it exploded. 

So, a week ago (Y/n) and Bucky had to have the talk with their five-year-old daughter. Not the birds and the bees, the whole: Your dad is an ex-assassin called the Winter Soldier, he was actually born in 1917 and the whole vibranium arm thing. 

Bucky sat Peanut in front of them. “P, I’m going to tell you something but you have to pay attention okay?”

Her big blue eyes turned into marbles and she nodded her head. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong baby,” (Y/n) assured. “We just need to talk about something that happened to Daddy because we want you to know it from us okay?”

“Where do I begin?” Bucky sighed, he never thought the most difficult person to explain this to would be a child. His child. Bucky never thought he would be able to have a child in the first place. He felt (Y/n)’s hand rub circles on his back and he relaxed into her touch. 

Bucky had warned her about this, how the Winter Soldier would always shadow him. Looming in the darkness. But (Y/n) had said she didn’t care, that their children together would understand what happened and the rest of the world can process it however they wanted to. And here she was, carrying out her end of the deal. 

“I was born a long time ago Peanut.” Bucky started.

P bursted into laughter. “I know that, silly goose. You have white hair! Like the pictures you show me of Uncle Stevie!”

(Y/n) bit the inside of her cheek to hide her laugh but she ended up having to hide behind Bucky as to not incite their daughter’s roasts.

“This is going well.” Bucky muttered.

“You don’t look like Steve, I promise.” She assured, running her fingers through the short hair on the back of his head. “Plus, I like your hair like this. Salt and pepper suits you.” 

But now, a week later, the two of them were called into the principal’s office. The glass door opened. 

“Good morning, thank you for coming.” He told (Y/n). “Should we wait for Mr. Barnes?”

“He won’t be joining us today.” She said in automatic but as she was walking into the principal’s office, a huffing Bucky came into view.

“Sorry I’m late.” Bucky took a deep breath, taking off his leather jacket and placing it behind one of the two chairs in front of the principal’s desk. He took the chair next to him out for (Y/n) to sit in before sitting down himself. 

“I know the two of you are very busy but this issue with your daughter needs to be fixed.” The principal started. “As you know, we are a very private school and we can assure you we’re talking to Billy’s parents as well.”

“Yesterday, Billy told your daughter that he knew who her father was.” The principal continued, making Bucky look down at the floor. “Billy’s older brother told him and showed him some videos on the internet.”

(Y/n) grew angry. “If this is Billy’s fault, then why are we here. James and I talked to you before P came to this school and you assured us it wouldn’t be a problem. We spend a lot of money on this school for this to suddenly become a problem.”

“The problem is that after this, your daughter threatened Billy. She said,” The principal took a look at the paper in front of him, a teacher’s report. “If you know who my dad is then you know you shouldn’t talk to me like that. When I tell him about you, he will squish you with his metal arm.” 

(Y/n) jaw dropped. Oh my god. 

She turned around to look at Bucky but he didn’t have the reaction she wanted. He sat there with a smug smile on his face and his arms crossed. 

“She’s defending herself.” Bucky shrugged and (Y/n) covered her face with her hands.

“You can’t just say that!” She laughed, they decided to get some coffee after the meeting with P’s principal. 

“Why not?” Bucky smiled. “I’m not going to tell off P just because of that stupid kid Billy who by the way, I would squish with my arm.”

“Good to know you’d turn Winter Soldier at the blink of Peanut’s eyes.” She rolled her eyes. 

“She’s my little girl! What else am I supposed to do?” 

“Something along the lines of: Peanut you can’t threaten people.” (Y/n) said, she didn’t think she would have to be explaining why threatening people is wrong to a hundred-year-old man. 

“I’m not going to tell her not to defend herself.” Bucky said. “She’s gutsy and headstrong, P takes after her mother.”

(Y/n) rolled her eyes. “I’m not headstrong.”

Bucky stopped in his tracks, taking (Y/n)’s shoulders in his hands and making her look at him. “I didn’t mean it like that, like it’s a bad thing- I love that about you. It was one of the things that drew me into you.” 

A smile developed on (Y/n)’s lips. “Who knew P’s heroic stunt would turn into a compliment shower. Not that I’m complaining.”

Bucky sipped his coffee, tucking her body under his arm and bringing (Y/n) flush to his side. “You want more? Let’s see, you’re insanely witty, you have a beautifully complex mind, you’re extremely hot and you have a thing for older men- which I much appreciate.”

She laughed, burring her face in his chest. It felt so familiar, it felt like home.

- 

It was two am when she heard the shriek. (Y/n) jumped out of bed and opened her bedroom door, trying to find Peanut. The moonlit stairs looked like a crime scene. Blood dripped from step to step all the way to the bottom, where Peanut lay screaming bloody murder.

She raced down the stairs and held her daughter in her arms.

“Mommy it hurts.” Peanut cried, bringing her hand up to a gash on her forehead. 

“I know it hurts baby, I know.” Tears flooded (Y/n)’s eyes but she couldn’t break, not in front of her bleeding daughter. “It’s okay P, I’m going to take you to the hospital okay?”

(Y/n) grabbed the first coat she could find in the closet and the nearest pair of shoes, she rushed to strap P on her car seat and drove to the hospital. 

Ring, ring. 

“Please answer Bucky, please.” (Y/n) had called her ex-husband from the car. 

“Hello?” Bucky’s raspy and sleep filled voice answered.

“Buck?” (Y/n)’s voice cracked, making Bucky sit up straight in bed in a second. “Something’s happened with Peanut, we’re on our way to the hospital.”

“I’ll be there in five.” Was all he said. 

(Y/n) paced outside the room, she could see her daughter sleeping on the white hospital bed through the cracks in the curtains. 

Two hands gripped her shoulders, one cold and one warm, making her eyes shoot up from the floor. 

“What happened?” Bucky asked, peeking into the room. 

“I don’t know what she was trying to do Buck- she got up in the middle of the night and somehow. I don’t know, she fell down the stairs and cut her forehead open.” (Y/n) spoke quickly, like if she processed the words she was speaking she would break. “She said something about wanting to sleep with the doll you brought from Wakanda- I don’t know.”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. Peanut is fine.” Bucky tried to soothe her. 

(Y/n) clenched her fists at her side and bit her cheek. Anything to stop her from crying. “If I hadn’t forgotten the stupid doll-“

Bucky took her face in his hands. “This was an accident, it’s no one’s fault.”

(Y/n) slowly nodded, trying to blink away the tears. 

Bucky’s eyes furrowed. “Doll, darling, look at me. I’m going to need you to say that. You know it was an accident right?”

“It was an accident.” She whispered, the pain becoming unbearable.

Bucky wrapped his arms around her, bringing her as close to him as possible. “You’re okay, everything’s going to be fine. I’m here, I’m here for you, for as long as you want me to be.”

That was it, what she needed to hear to break down. To be vulnerable. To know someone would be there to catch her if she fell. 

(Y/n) sobbed into Bucky’s chest for what felt like hours. And he was there, rubbing her back soothingly and whispering kind words into her ear. 

It was well into the evening the next day when Peanut was finally given the all clear from her doctors. Three stitches and an ankle sprain later, she was tucked into bed. 

“I need you to promise me you will never ever do that again.” Bucky brought the comforter up as he tucked Peanut in. 

“Promise daddy.” She smiled. “You wanna know something cool?”

“What’s that?” Bucky ran his finger against her cheek. 

Peanut sat up and pulled Bucky’s cap sleeve up to his shoulder. “Daddy and P are gonna match.”

Bucky’s eyes swelled with tears as he saw his little girl’s tiny hand rub against the scarred skin on his left shoulder. It was like all the pain and suffering suddenly turned into something good. With six simple words, Peanut made everything worth it.

“We sure are.” Bucky lips turned upwards. 

“She looks so peaceful, you wouldn’t imagine she’s a little tornado once those pretty eyes open.” Bucky chuckled lightly as he closed his daughter’s bedroom door. 

“We’ve been amazing parents for the past 24 hours, could I interest you in a glass of cheap wine that will definitely give us a headache tomorrow?” (Y/n) smiled. 

“You read my mind.” Bucky leaned his head back with closed eyes, he grabbed the baby monitor from the hallway credenza. “How about you go outside and I’ll bring everything out. You deserve a break.”

And what a break he gave (Y/n). Bucky just about held the glass of wine to her lips. He brought out the drinks, some snacks and started by bringing her legs closer to him. Massaging her tired calves. 

“I still remember when we bought the house.” Bucky hummed. “And now it’s been what- six years?”

“Do you remember when we wanted to buy that new build? Everything was so white and sterile.” (Y/n) laughed. “But as soon as I found this house, I knew it was the one.”

“Excuse me?” Bucky laughed, eyebrows raised. “If I remember correctly, I was the one who found the house. You were sad thinking we hadn’t found a home, and I was the one who begged you to come and see it.”

(Y/n)’s happy smile dimmed. “We were so happy when we first moved in, what happened?”

“I took you for granted.” Bucky sighed. “That’s what happened.”

“After Steve left, I think I just stopped wanting anything. Work seemed boring, life at home was scary, taking care of P was terrifying for me. For years I thought I would be alone in this world and then suddenly, you came and gave me more love than I deserved. Gave me a beautiful daughter.” Bucky opened his heart. “And instead of working on myself I decided to just stop, stop trying. And it was selfish of me to think that you would just ride along with me even though I did everything to push you away. I never wanted you to think I didn’t love you, God do I love you. Sometimes I’m truly scared of what I feel because I love you so much it hurts. It pains me to have had you and lost you.”

Bucky tried to get out a strong voice but it cracked. “And I’ll live the rest of my life loving you and regretting having lost you. Sometimes, I think it’s a form of Karma. Like the gods above don’t know every wrong thing I did wasn’t me so now I have to live with this deep regret. The kind that settles into your bones.”

“Buck-“ (Y/n) tried to comfort him.

“No,” He shook his head. “you’re too sweet for your own good and you’ll try and tell me it’s not my fault. But it is. I’m not telling you this so you have pity on me, I just want you to know that I fucked up. You were perfect and amazing and I didn’t know what to do with something so delicate.”

“And I’m saying this just so you know that I’ll always be here for you. I’ll always love you.” 

(Y/n) couldn’t take it anymore. She crashed her lips onto his. A kiss that would explain everything she felt. All the anger, all the sadness and especially all the love. A kiss that says: I love you too.

She rested her forehead against his, her breath shallow. “Can you stay?”

“Stay tonight?” He asked, his voice pained. 

“Please stay forever.” She whispered. 

Thank you thank you sooo much for the love! Hope you guys like it, if you do remember to like reblog and comment! I'll love you forever if you do &lt;3

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Hi hiiii This is part of my 1k Celebration, if you like this please be sure to look at the Bingo Card and ask for a prompt! Love y'all <33

And you can find the Bingo master list and what prompts are still available here!

[daddytonysgirl17]

[brooklynn3253]

Unspoken Signals pt. 3

Bucky Barnes: The Best Kind of Hero Returns Home with Pregnancy Cravings

As the evening sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm golden hue across the skyline, you found yourself lost in thought, eager yet anxious for your husband’s return. Bucky Barnes, the Winter Soldier turned devoted boyfriend, was out on a mission for the Avengers—one of those missions that seemed endless, filled with the weight of responsibility and stakes that felt impossibly high. Yet, tonight was special. Tonight, he would not just return as the superhero you met, but as the father of your child, a reality confirmed through the tiny bump growing in your belly and the moments of pure joy that accompanied the journey of pregnancy.

While you busied yourself with small chores around the house, the sound of the door clicking open pulled your attention. Any trace of worry quickly dissipated as you turned to see Bucky striding in, his tall frame silhouetted against the doorway. His cobalt blue eyes shone with warmth, and a smile broke across his face at the sight of you. The bond that you had forged through trials, buttressed by his scope of hardships and your shared love, felt even more potent amidst the excitement of your impending parenthood.

As he approached you, a playful twinkle ignited in his eyes. “Hey, gorgeous,” he said softly, enveloping you in an embrace, his arms wrapping protectively around your midsection. You could still smell the traces of the leather jacket he had donned earlier, mingled with the faint scent of the mission—a hint of gunpowder and adrenaline. You embraced him tightly, feeling the love radiating from him anchor you in a tumultuous sea of hormones and emotions.

“Did you bring it?” you asked eagerly, the anticipation of your pregnancy cravings igniting an infectious smile on your face. For weeks, Bucky had teased about the little experiment of picking up your wild cravings from the various parts of the world he had visited on missions. You weren’t entirely sure what he had in store for you, but the thought itself ignited a spark of excitement in your heart.

With a theatrical flair, Bucky reached into his backpack. He pulled out various items, each comically exaggerated, revealing his talent at fulfilling your cravings with nothing short of precision. First came a box of gourmet donuts from a café he found in Brooklyn—a raspberry-filled delight you had been pining for since the first trimester began. Next, he produced artisanal cheese from a farmer’s market he stumbled upon in Vermont, accompanied by a variety of crackers. Then, to top it all, a bottle of sriracha sauce he had been carrying from a Thai food stall in Tokyo.

“What can I say?” he grinned, leaning against the kitchen counter, “Your cravings are my commandments.”

You laughed, taking in the selection as if it were a treasure trove curated just for you. “You’re insane,” you remarked fondly, “but oh my God, it all looks amazing!” You felt an overwhelming sense of appreciation for him—this man who had once lived a life of turmoil, now transformed into your partner in this beautiful journey. Together, you were building a family, even amidst the chaos of his previous life as an assassin.

After indulging in the sweet, rich, and savory delicacies he had brought, the two of you settled on the couch, Bucky’s arm draped protectively around your shoulders. With the warm glow of the lamp illuminating the cozy living room, you couldn't help but share some of your thoughts and concerns.

“What’s it like out there?” you asked softly, your voice barely above a whisper. “You deal with so much, and I worry about you.”

Bucky turned to you, his expression softening. “It’s a world out there, full of chaos and danger,” he replied, his voice thick with sincerity, “but knowing that you’re here… waiting for me... it makes everything worth it.” He brushed a strand of hair behind your ear, emphasizing the intimacy of the moment.

You could feel your heart swell with love and pride. Bucky had a past filled with darkness, a past that still haunted him. But he had emerged modern-day phoenix-like, and his devotion to you and your unborn child illuminated his path. Even in the toughest moments, he kept pushing forward, not just for the mission, but for the family that was growing.

In the months leading up to your baby’s arrival, there was an unspoken understanding between you. You changed as a couple and as a family. The nights spent planning and dreaming of parenthood felt like a sacred ritual. It was a shared experience laden with hope and, yes, a hint of nervousness. As your body changed, so did your relationship, growing deeper in ways neither of you could have anticipated.

That night, Bucky held your hands, warmth spreading between your fingers as he looked at you, eyes glimmering with unshed tears. “We’re gonna be great parents, you know that, right? We have each other,” he affirmed, his voice steady but filled with emotion.

You smiled through your own tears, feeling valor grip your heart. Resilience was a hallmark of your relationship, woven through the battles you had fought together. In this shared journey of parenthood, you imagined two parents learning, making mistakes, and growing alongside their little one. It was thrilling, and it was terrifying.

In that moment, with laughter echoing off the walls and the scent of sriracha still lingering in the air, you and Bucky began to transform a quirky evening into the foundation of your future—a tapestry rich with love and adventure. The winding road of parenthood lay ahead, paved with affection, laughter, and the occasional culinary adventure, but it didn’t matter what lay ahead.

As long as you had Bucky by your side, the journey was bound to be extraordinary, complete with the magical intersection of heroics, cravings, and the undeniable joy of family. You closed your eyes, resting your head on his shoulder, feeling content and ready for all that was yet to come.

[mcu-4-you]

War Child

Part one

Bucky Barnes x (Fem) Reader

Avengers x (Fem) Reader

Warnings: Blood, mention of deaths, other creepy hydra shit, bad language words (lol) and a lot more other warnings, so be prepared.

Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Clint Barton (Sometimes) Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner (Sometimes) Thor Odison, Loki Laufeyson, Peter Parker, Sam Wilson, Wanda Maximoff, Pietro Maximoff, Bucky Barnes, Yelena Belova, Arnim Zola,

Description: You're a hydra experiment or had been one since you were young, For years you lived within the cold walls of Siberia and when you finally get free, faces from the past and demons come out to haunt you Reader is an enchanted superhuman, she has the super soldier serum giving her, super speed, super strength, a healing factor, fast metabolism, endurance, strong lung capacity & etc, she also has both fire and ice magic. The time line in this will review the past and present. Reader can look anyway you want. Her soon love interest will be Bucky. Authors Note: Please know that none of these characters belong to me, they belong to marvel, Y/N is your character of choice. also your thoughts will be orange, Bucky's thoughts will be blue and the others will be purple

Avengers tower present 9:34 am Avengers pov

Gathered around table enjoying breakfast and conversation sits the avengers, everyone seems happy, Bucky and Loki bantering with one another about who can do bad better, Steve acting like a mom and Tony being the overgrown brat, Wanda, Natasha and Yelena talking quietly amongst each other in sokovian, then there's Peter, Pietro, Sam and Thor arguing about how many bad guys they can beat in a fight, like family they're fun and chaotic. Everything seemed to go quiet when the leather jacket wearing, eye patched man walks in with a file and flash drive, the atmosphere once relaxed and playful now tense and serious, as all eyes land on the director Nick Fury. "Hope i'm not souring the mood." he says his tone, dripping with his usual uncaring sarcasm. "Anyways." he continues, "We have a problem, a big one, a loose cannon hydra related one." He sets down the file on the middle of the table and Bucky is the first to grab it, the minute he opens it, the color from his face drains, there it was a whole section dedicated to you, a ghost is what you are, one he was made to train when he was The winter soldier, a deadly weapon is what you became, just like him, but unlike him, he was captured, but you, you were born and raised into a hell, and turned into something so deadly.

Steve looks at Bucky and raises a brow in concern and curiosity, Steve pauses debating whether he should say anything but he decides to anyway, "Hey Buck, you alright, you look a little pale." Bucky snaps out of his current thoughts and glances at Steve and the rest of the team and he swallows, a shaky sigh leaving his lips and he says "I know her, i knew her." Every member of the team gives each other looks before nodding and taking turns to look at the entire file and Sam speaks "So where do we start?"

Italy present

Your Pov I arrive back into my rented apartment, after getting some needed food and water, i knew my time here in Italy was running thin but there was something about this place i liked, i couldn't get comfortable though, it was only a matter of time before the devil came knocking. After heating up a simple tv dinner, i sit on the small couch in my living room watching the old school box television, it's on the news channel, the headlines read "Avengers strike once again saving over a hundred innocent civilians from a hostage situation with the terrorist group known as HYDRA." A sigh leaves me and i start eating as i change the channel to a cartoon, it wasn't one i've seen before, it was a blonde with really long hair and a pretty purple dress, now interested i continue to watch the movie and finish my dinner, soon i set my plate aside and just watch tv, i was enjoying the movie more than i'd like to admit. Berlin 1953 (Past & your nightmare) "Papa, i don't understand what you want me to do, you little voice trembles as you look up at the man in front of you, he stare you down and pats you head, his German accent thick as he speaks, "In time, you will learn to master the gift i have given you my child." a grin spreads on Zola's lips, to you it seemed innocent but only if you knew it was anything but innocent.

Your Pov (Present) I jolted awake in a slight sweat, my eyes dart around the room, weariness and confusion etched on my features, i thought i was back hom-there, but i'm in my living room, i'm in Italy, i swallow and wipe my forehead with the sleeve of my sweater and i stand up, my steps are silent on the wood floors as i walk into the kitchen, i fill me a glass of water and gulp it down as if i was a man stuck in the desert. my hands are shaky as i set the glass down and stare at the dark curtained covered windows. "He's gone, no longer here." i tell myself and i make my way to my bathroom, a shower was much needed to calm myself.

Berlin 1954 (Past & Bucky's nightmare) "Soldat! you're back with the stuff." Zola hums in approval and takes the metal case from the winter soldier, he snaps his fingers for the soldier to follow him and the soldier complies without question. Zola leads the soldier into the lab, for a moment the soldier tenses, he didn't think he had another procedure today but then his eyes falls onto you, a girl strapped down onto a table asleep, he blinks, he couldn't tell if it was worry, or surprise but he manages to school it like he was taught, the soldiers eyes follow Zola as he pulls out the bag of super serum, it was a cheap one, not to affective but it'll still work, just not like his, the soldier watches as Zola sticks it into an IV like bag and he watches as Zola stick the IV into you and slowly the serum makes it way to your skin and finally it slips into your blood stream making you jolt in pain and cry out.

Avengers tower (Present) Bucky's room Bucky's Pov His eyes snap open quickly and they dart around, checking for any signs of danger or anyone one at all, nothing it's all silent except for his racing heart and his own breathing, his brows are furrowed as he recalls the nightmare, that day, the day when Karpor made him bring that serum to Zola, that day where your life would change for ever and not for the good, a wave of guilt floods through Bucky as he thinks about that day, how he just watched, and stood there as that evil son of a bitch gave you that serum with no remorse as he hurt and changed you drastically. Bucky knew he had to find you, hell he knew you were lost and confused like he was and like he had steve, you'll have him.

Let me know what you think, i will definitely be making different parts to this story, i'm pausing my other story to work on this one since i had this longer and like this better. Part two is being worked on so stay tuned.

Tag list: @sapphirebarnes i know you wanted to be tagged in my other post but i'm keeping that on hold right now, so i hope you like this one just as much.

[stxrvel]

i don't wanna live forever (2)

summary: you and Steve share some time together after so much time apart, and you finally start getting closer to your goal back in Europe after so many years

pairing: bucky barnes x f!reader

words: +4k

warning: just some bad words

note: hey guys! hope u guys like this part! we're getting close to the mythic winter soldier >:). i'll try to edit and publish next part tomorrow after work. i'm close to finish this fic, probably will be 6-7 chapters. so i'll see you around, thank you for the support <3

part 1 ; part 3 ; part 4

You thought having Steve back would make things better. Not that they were any worse, but there couldn't have been a worse time to go through a goddamn alien invasion.

“Holy shit,” you spoke into the air, but Steve at your side elbowed you, hearing you clearly, his scowl meeting you amidst the masses of air. “Are you seeing what I see?”

“Do you have to say it like that?“

“Ah, poor, right Steve. God save him from hearing a bad word because a little star on his suit will die,” Tony Stark walked past you, catching up to overhear the conversation, teasing you with a smirk on his face. You tensed as he passed behind you, shaking your head to avoid his gaze, earning you a confused look from Steve.

Tony continued on his way, currently accustomed to you not even glancing his way when they were in the same place. His suit was almost completely shredded, an unfamiliar feeling of dread coursing through you from the pit of your stomach until you felt the heartburn in the back of your throat bother you. Ever since you saw on the news that he was proclaimed Ironman, that feeling of dread had been with you every time you saw him. You knew why, but you didn't want to give voice to those thoughts…

“For a person who's lived this many years, you're pretty bad at dissembling,” Steve spoke again as Tony disappeared down the hallway and you shook your head shutting him up, refocusing on what was important. “I can't believe I crashed a plane into the Arctic just to get this thing back to the surface before me.”

“Well, it'll be in good hands now,” you nodded in the direction of the approaching Norse god, his walk a bit overbearing as he dedicated sidelong glances at them as he approached the scepter of Loki, his brother.

“If you're done admiring it, time to go.”

Steve moved in the direction of the elevator, waving his hand for you to join him, but you shook your head in refusal and pointed him to the stairs. Your friend didn't read too much into your gesture, lifting a shoulder and resuming his walk to where the rest of the team was grouped. Just looking at them, you remembered the smug smile Fury had given you when you agreed, finally, to be part of the team, after learning that Steve would be too. He was damn lucky, that's all, because that wouldn't happen again. What were the odds of two alien invasions happening in one year, after all?

After they delivered the scepter and Loki, you'd be long gone from there, focusing on your primary mission in getting into SHIELD in the first place, which Fury had as much knowledge of as you did.

“Hey,” you greeted Steve again, meeting him just after the Norse gods disappeared.

“Hey,” he approached, wearing that brown leather jacket he hadn't let go of since the moment he touched it. The team was taking their leave behind him, each focusing on their own business from now on. As you crossed glances with Natasha Romanoff, that feeling of familiarity coursed through your body once again. It was odd, you were sure you had seen her sometime before. “Do you want a ride?”

You saw Steve shake his head in the direction of his motorcycle, moving faster than him as you sensed Tony was approaching to say goodbye.

“Is something wrong with your friend?” you heard him speak and as each time you couldn't help but compare his voice to Howard. They were so alike in their youth and adulthood. You didn't even want to think about becoming a close person in his life when you knew what you knew. If he found out about it through other means it would be a disaster. As much as you wanted to look out for his safety, perhaps as Howard would've liked, you didn't want to cross that line without figuring out all the loose ends first. That would be a problem if Fury ever thought of summoning them back.

“She's shy,” Steve replied, and you had to hold back the urge to reach back and pat his head. “Big fan of yours.”

“Really?” Tony sounded genuinely surprised. “I thought she hated me.”

“No, not at all. She studied some mechanical stuff too and admires your work from afar. But you know, never meet your idols,” you could make out Steve's smile behind your words, inwardly wincing with embarrassment.

“Well, I'm not that bad. Tell her anytime she wants we can talk.”

You heard no more of their conversation, feeling the bile travel down your esophagus to the back of your throat. How Tony could look at you and not recognize you as the strange woman who sat next to him at his father's wake was completely beyond you, but you weren't too intrigued if it helped you stay away. You didn't want him to start asking questions.

When you heard Steve's footsteps approach and the doors of Tony's red car close, you turned around to face your friend, his face of fake innocence angering you a little.

“You're an asshole,” you spat the words at him almost in a half-whisper, afraid that for some reason Tony might hear them.

“There's not that much of a lie in what I said,” the blond barely lifted a shoulder, mounting his motorcycle.

“You could've simply told him the truth: I do dislike him.”

“That's not true,” Steve shook his head, starting the motorcycle after you got on behind him.

“How could you know that?”

“He's Howard's son,” Steve blurted out, your movements slowing as you tried to get comfortable looking at him in the bike's mirror. “You couldn't hate him, even if you wanted to.”

You didn't rebut, not because he was right, but because it was the first time he'd mentioned Howard since you'd seen him after almost seventy years.

Since you'd run into him in that secret section of SHIELD, you two hadn't had much time for you to fill him in on the things that had happened, Fury jumping into the action directly telling them that the object Steve sacrificed his life for was back in the hands of the enemy and they needed to stop him. You could barely tell him about Howard's death and about Peggy as they were thrown onto the battlefield.

Now, as Steve drove you back to your apartment, all you could think about was that you still hadn't had time to have that talk. That talk where you would have to tell him a lot of things.

The smell of lavender that prevailed in your apartment did little to calm the little anxiety you felt the moment Steve closed the door behind him. A strange tension surrounded your shoulders and you were sure he felt it too, by the odd way he cleared his throat, moving into the living room, where he seemed to almost touch the ceiling of how small everything was.

“Nice place,” he commented absently, eyeing the paintings and colorful bookshelves you had in the living room and dining room.

“Sit. Want some coffee?” you ran to the kitchen, looking to escape that searing uncertainty.

“Water's fine.”

Fine. Water it is.

Returning to the living room, you found him mounted in your largest armchair, his knees too bent toward his chest for all the space he took up.

“So…”

“Are you going to tell me what happened?”

Straight to the point. You didn't blame him, he must have been too curious. You didn't even know how he'd spent those days swallowing the urge to ask.

So you got straight to the point. You told him everything that happened after he crashed the plane. You told him about his funeral, about how the government started chasing you so hard that you had to leave the country and you kept going for years only because of Howard; you told him about how Peggy went on with her life, working, founding SHIELD many years later with Howard; you told him about Howard dying in a car accident, the half-truth burning your throat. Steve didn't even think anything was wrong by the way your voice cracked and you fought to keep the tears inside, what you were realizing was harder now that he was here. You told him that you came back from Europe thanks to Peggy, as head of SHIELD, making sure to keep you under her protection, and currently you still were. Maybe you had as much power as the Director himself because of how much Peggy saw to it that the Feds didn't bother.

You told him about Peggy getting sick, about her Alzheimer's. You told him how she hardly remembered things now; she had few lucid moments and forgot things very quickly. You gave him a moment to assimilate the information when you noticed his eyes sparkling.

“But she… did she live well?”

“Very well,” you nodded, smiling sincerely.

Steve nodded, letting a little tension escape from his shoulders. The silence that enveloped you two was a little more pleasant, leaving room for you to stop overthinking about what you should and shouldn't tell Steve.

“And you… what did you do all those years in Europe?” Steve was perceptive to take the one topic you didn't delve into at all, and you sighed in defeat. “It was… what, forty-five years?”

“Yes,” you nodded in the middle of a sigh, your gaze returning to the black TV screen, Steve's eyes fixed on your profile. “I studied a lot.”

“I assumed so, but was that all?”

“You might say. I studied nine majors,” you counted mentally, remembering the pictures that were stored somewhere in that apartment, courtesy of Peggy and Howard.

Steve whistled, a short laugh following his surprised expression.

“And why didn't you want to talk about that?”

“It's not that interesting-”

“Not that interesting? Better tell me what grades you have,” Steve grumbled, not giving way for you to try to avoid the subject one more time. Being that you had only talked about it with Peggy before, you took an inspiration to remember what it was like to tell her to reminisce with Steve.

“I started with some basics. Bachelor's degrees in math, physics and chemistry. Then I moved on to some engineering: mechanical, electronics, mechatronics. Astronomy, criminology, some marketing to survive when I went back to the States and they were in the middle of the technology revolution. I was studying medicine when Peggy called me back.”

“What year?”

“First one.”

“Wow,” Steve looked at you, as if he suddenly had to see you in a different light, his eyebrows still raised in surprise. “That's amazing. You know a little bit about everything.”

“Yeah, it really helped me get some good jobs and break even so Howard and Peggy didn't have to spend so much,” you nodded in his direction, his gaze intent on everything you were saying.

“I'm glad they took such good care of you,” Steve gave a lopsided smile, the warmest, most memory-evoking smile he could have given you.

“I wish I could've repaid them for all they did for me,” you commented, with a tone of remorse and sadness that Steve picked up on instantly.

“I'm sure they were more than satisfied to know you were okay. That was their priority. You know you couldn't make those decisions for them, right?”

You nodded, lips pressed into a thin line.

Steve took in all the information you had to give him like a sponge, surely thinking that after seeing an alien invasion nothing could be that surprising. You guys spent a good while there, relaxing in your living room, placing food orders when the conversation turned to movies and series that Steve knew nothing about.

You spent an excellent rest of the day, Steve asking the odd question here and there, until you decided to watch the Star Wars movies first at the blond's request. You felt like they were back in '43 again, talking about everything and nothing at the same time, dreaming of the possibility of a life beyond what their social context allowed them.

Perhaps your dream was fulfilled in the most unexpected way possible.

-

The days ahead were now to be very careful. Steve would be spending more time at SHIELD, being that it would become basically his full-time job, and you needed to likewise spend time there focusing on your primary mission.

“What?”

Fury's eyebrows inched up, his face showing disbelief enough to make you doubt your decisions for a second, his forearms resting on his desk leaning forward. You shook your head slightly, maintaining your posture.

“I'm not going to tell him.”

“Why the hell not?” Fury raised his voice, as if for some reason your decision affected him personally.

“Because I don't want to, Nicholas. And I need you to help me cover it up.”

“Ah,” the man slumped back in his black chair, one hand rubbing his forehead as if the subject caused him as much of a headache as it did her. “Not only do you have to lie, but you have to lump me in the lying sack with you.”

“I'm not lying…! That much…”

“You do know that lies have short legs? What are you going to do when he finds out?”

“Nicholas, I need you to understand that Steve is not my priority right now. It's been twenty-one years and we haven't made any progress. I need to get to the fucking bottom of this, because whoever is behind it is still out there. I'm sure of it.”

Fury pursed his lips, barely shaking his head in a subtle nod, reluctanly agreeing with you finally.

“I'll put Steve on the front lines of every mission I can find,” Fury conceded to your request, his index finger tapping the wood of his desk like clockwork.

“Thank-”

“But you,” he raised his hand, pointing that index finger at you accusingly, interrupting your genuine thanks, “you're going to have to start thinking outside the box.”

“I have some guesses, actually.”

Fury rested his arms on the edge of the desk, leaning over to give you his undivided attention.

“Enlighten me.”

-

“So you're going back to Europe,” was the first thing you heard Steve say when you met him at SHIELD, two months after extreme missions he had to attend, barely spending a day at the facility before leaving again.

At first you thought Fury was overdoing it and offered to talk to him if he wanted to slow down, but surprisingly Steve was fine with it. In fact, he told you that it helped him deal with all the stress of having been in the Arctic for seventy years, and since you hadn't been through anything like that, you weren't going to judge.

“Yeah, evil doesn't rest,” you smiled absently at him, holding tightly to the strap of the black travel suitcase with enough belongings for a whole year.

“You know I already have a phone, right? You can call me,” Steve commented, pulling his cell phone out of his pocket and shaking it in front of her to emphasize his request.

“Yeah, you gave me your number last week.”

“Ah, I just wanted to remind you because it's been five days since we've seen each other and I just found out you're going on a one-way trip,” his reproachful voice, but with some amused tones in there somewhere, made you wince as you remembered that you had indeed forgotten to inform your friend that you were going away, for quite a long time. In your defense, you had already gone too many years without telling anyone anything, and you were just getting used to having a friend to talk to more often again.

“Sorry,” you offered him an embarrassed smile, barely earning the shake of his head from side to side. “I'll bring lots of gifts from Europe, I promise.”

You raised your free hand to the level of your head, smiling more confidently at him, with his you better response echoing in your head as you averted your gaze to find behind him Tony Stark walking directly towards where you two were standing. There was no way you could run away from the inevitable interaction with the mechanic without overlooking saying goodbye to Steve, when you weren't going to see him for probably a long time. So you tensed up, the blond reading your body language long before you realized you were being too obvious.

And just as Steve was about to turn around, Tony patted his shoulder in salute.

“Nice to see you again,” through his sunglasses, he smiled openly at you, and you had to force a tight-lipped smile under Steve's tense gaze on you. “What are they up to now? Fury called me in for a confidential thing, won't I be teaming up with you guys?”

You were quick to shake your head, Steve barely muttering a no, amused to see you so dazed and nervous in front of the mechanic.

“That's too bad. I don't think-” Tony interrupted his own words as his phone vibrated in his pocket. Answering it right in front of them, you shrank in place trying to run away from there. “Happy.”

“Tony,” the man on the other end of the line didn't sound so happy to hear it unlike Tony, who had a big smile on his face. “Why are you forwarding my calls?”

“What? No, of course not. It's just that you're on my blocking contacts when I activate do not disturb and since I was driving…” Stark lifted a shoulder, indifferent to the looks you and Steve shared in front of him.

The other line on the phone was silent for a few seconds until chaos broke out.

“Pourquoi tu ne réponds pas aux appels? Pourquoi pas une urgence? Et si ta maison était en feu?” Happy grumbled from the other end, Tony scowling at the phone as if it was the fault of technology.

“Happy, how many times do I have to tell you to stop talking to me in French? I don't under-”

“He's asking you to answer the phone when you call, maybe someday it will be an emergency,” you translated before you could stop yourself, biting your tongue when Steve sent you a raised eyebrow look with a playful smile.

“You know French?” Tony addressed you, probably as surprised as you were because it was the first time you'd actively addressed him.

“She studied mechanics in France,” your friend spoke before you could think of anything on your own, and you had to physically battle to restrain your body from punching him in the face.

Steve had to stop doing that.

“Wow. Impressive,” Tony shook his head in nods, detailing her with his eyes with genuine curiosity.

“Tony!” Happy's voice interrupted the moment that felt tense, and Tony refocused on the reason he'd entered the SHIELD facility in the first place.

“Ah,” the mechanic grumbled, moving to continue on his way. “See you guys later.”

He waved his hand as he walked, turning his back to them and you followed him with your eyes until he disappeared down the hallway. At least he was still alive.

When you looked back at Steve, that strange smile hadn't disappeared from his face.

“What other language do you speak?”

He looked like a child, his eyes sparkling with curiosity.

“I'm not going to talk to you right now.”

You held the strap of the suitcase to sling it over your shoulder and walk in the direction of the exit, when Steve snatched it out of your hands and slung it over his own shoulder, his offended look being the only thing you got back.

“Why not?”

“You need to stop saying those things to Tony,” you frowned at him, lowering your voice as if, again, the mechanic might hear them. “Don't you know that lies have short legs?”

Steve laughed like you’d never heard before, probably not even in the forties, taking his stomach for a laugh. When you went out to the avenue and he followed you with sporadic laughter, you could not help but outline your own smile, missing in advance the time you spent with him.

“I can’t believe you said that,” Steve shook his head, his face red from laughing so much. He was barely calming down when you managed to stop a cab.

“You’re an idiot,” you snatched the suitcase from his hands and gave it to the taxi driver who had just gotten out of his car. “I guess this is goodbye.”

“For now. You’re not going to get rid of me so easily this time,” Steve joked, approaching to wrap you in a big hug. You wrapped your arms around his neck, even though you had to stand on your toes to hug him tightly. The serum hadn’t given you as much height as he had. “Call me, write me or just let me know how you are. At least once a day.”

“Yeah dad,” you walked away, breaking the hug and shaking your hands casually. “I’ll keep you in the loop.”

“Take care.”

“Sure. You take care of Peggy,” his eyes softened, the mere memory of Peggy returning him.

“Of course.”

His warm smile was the last thing you saw before getting into the cab.

[buckysdollsworld]

The Adventures of Bucky Barnes and Y/n Stark | Chapter two: Home not so sweet home | Bucky's Doll

Gifs, not mine!!!

Warnings: Kidnapping, medical tools (needle, drugs), curse word or two

Content: 18+ MDNI, adult topics, kidnapping

Pairings: Buckyxreader, Readerxkidnapper, Readerxex-boyfriend, BuckyxFemalereader

A/n: I'm having so much fun writing this series. Let me know how you like this series so far and any feedback or story requests are welcome also please go show this story love on my Wattpad

It had been hours since Rowan had taken you. Bucky and the others were in their hotel room the only one who seemed calm was Zemo of course Zemo was calm it was his idea to give me away in the first place. Little did everyone know I was with Rowan they had all thought you were still with Selby. It was silent in the room all that could be heard was the footsteps of Bucky pacing. Sam finally speaks up breaking the silence

"So what was your plan Zemo?" Bucky glared at Zemo as Sam spoke "More importantly how do you plan on us getting her back?" Sam finishes.

"Glad you finally asked you see next week Selby will be auctioning off her little pets along with others we will simply buy our friend Y/n back," Zemo says as if it's that simple.

"Or we can go back out there and save her ass from whatever bullshit they're going to do to her," Bucky growls.

"Your little girlfriend shall be fine soldier they won't hurt her at least not now they need her in the best shape for the auction" Zemo is so carefree it annoyed Bucky. Bucky grabs his leather jacket off the back of the couch and walks towards the door."Where are you going?" Sam asks as Bucky opens the door.

"To find my girlfriend." Bucky walks out closing the door behind him he walks down to the hotel lobby and out the doors. Bucky was determined to find you it's the only thing that matters to him now. He went to the parking lot hopped on his motorcycle and started driving back to the club.

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Meanwhile, you were with Rowan he had locked you in your cell it was the place you had stayed when The Winter Soldier project was going on. He had left you there alone with your thoughts it had been hours, and all you could do was wait. All the horrors you used to endure came back to you the longer you stayed in that awful cell. A few moments later the door can be heard creaking open Rowan was back and ready for his fun to begin.

"Hi princess are you ready to play?" he asks coming to the cell door you are sitting on the cold concrete floor hugging your knees when he starts talking to you your attention goes up to him but you say nothing.

"Oh come on don't be that way I just want to help you," he says with an evil grin.

"Rowan why am I here?" you ask as your voice is strained from crying. He has a smug grin like he has big plans for you.

"We're just going to play a little game and if you're good you'll be rewarded and if you're bad..." Rowan pauses a moment "Well let's just say you won't like what will happen, so are you going to be good?" You look up at him and nod you know there is no escaping what is about to happen. You slowly began to stand up as Rowan gestured for you to come closer you were hesitant to get closer but did so taking your time. Rowan smirks as you reach the bars of the cell doors he is amused at whatever games he is playing at.

"Kneel" he demanded before opening the cell door. You looked at him before dropping to your knees you dropped your gaze to the ground.

"Such a good girl" he praises opening the door he brings one of his hands to trace your cheek tracing down to your chin and tilting your head up to meet his gaze. Rowan loved that scared look in your eyes he got off on your fear he had some plan for you and it wasn't good.

"Now you are going to behave and stay right here until I say otherwise," Rowan says with a serious expression. You nod and Rowan walks over to a table with various things that are too far to make out but close enough to know something there. Your eyes dart around the room trying to find an exit or something to help you escape. Rowan was too occupied with gathering things to notice You noticed he had left the upstairs door open now was your chance while he wasn't looking you carefully got up and took steps towards the stairs keeping your eyes on Rowan to ensure he was still busy. You slowly start up the stairs your attention now at the door and you feel a sense of hope maybe you could actually get out of here but right when you reach the door you hear Rowan's voice from behind you.

"Where do you think you're going? I'm not done with you yet" Rowan says as he quickly makes his way to you wrapping his arms around you and pulling you back. All hope disappeared from you, you knew exactly how things were going to end it felt like you were back in the past all over again. With one hand Rowan reaches into his pocket and pulls out a syringe with some type of drug in it he sticks the needle into your skin in an instant everything starts to disappear and fade to black Rowan had sedated you.

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Bucky arrives back at the bar he was raging as he barged in heading straight back to Selby. Once he gets to the door to Selby's V.I.P. room he is stopped by her guards.

"Woah woah woah soldier not so fast," one of the guards says stopping Bucky from entering.

"I need to see Selby, now" Bucky growls he wasn't going to take no for an answer but the guards don't move.

"Selby isn't taking guests at the moment come back tomorrow" The guards hold their ground crossing their arms over their chest. Bucky is about to say something back but before he opens his mouth to speak Selby emerges from her room.

"It's okay boys let him in" she commands her guards to move when they move Bucky goes in immediately looking around for you.

"Where is she?" Bucky asks sternly

"Who?" Selby smirks she enjoyed with Bucky

"Don't play that fucking game with me, Selby. Where is Y/n?"

"Lighten up soldier she's fine she's in good hands" Selby reassures Bucky but something in her tone was deceiving. Bucky wasn't playing games especially when it came to you Bucky got closer to Selby reaching out to grab her by the collar.

"I swear if you hurt her" Bucky growls

"You'll what? You'll kill me? Please do but let me remind you your little girlfriend is in my care if anything happens to me my men will not hesitate to do the same to her" As soon as Selby says that he releases his grip from Selby and steps back.

"Since you are so desperate to get her back I may cut you a deal" Selby smirks "Bring me some super soldier serum and I'll give you the coordinates where Y/n is being kept" Bucky had a big choice to make he could either get the serum for Selby and save you or risk it all and do things himself. Bucky thought for a long moment before speaking up.

"Fine I'll do it" he wasn't happy about agreeing but he knew he had to save you.

"Great you have 48 hours to get it to me or deals off," Selby says. Bucky left getting back onto his bike and heading back to the hotel.

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Once back at the hotel, he barges in.

"Zemo how do we get super solder serum? I know you know where to get some" Bucky asks

"Ah so the soldier needs more serum," Zemo smirks with amusement

"Woah woah woah Bucky what are you talking about that shit is dangerous, why do you want it?" Sam buds in

"Look it's the only way to get Y/n back I will do anything it takes" Bucky pleads

"I understand but what happens when something goes wrong if the wrong person gets their hands on the serum all the work we did to fix this mess will be for nothing think about it Buck" Sam tries to reason with him. Bucky looks so defeated he is desperate to get you back. Sam puts a hand on Bucky's shoulder.

"We're going to get her back man just not like this" Sam tries reassuring him.

[love-my-fictional-men123]

Title: Healing Wounds

Summary: After the events of "Avengers: Endgame," Bucky Barnes is trying to adjust to life in a world that has moved on without him. But when he meets a kind and compassionate woman named Y/N, he starts to believe that maybe he has a chance at finding happiness again.

Word Count: 2,500

Bucky Barnes couldn't quite believe he was standing in the middle of a bustling New York City street. The last time he had been here, things were different. He was a soldier, a weapon, a ghost haunted by his past. But now, after everything that had happened, he was just a man trying to find his place in a world that had moved on without him.

He tried to blend in as best as he could, his metal arm hidden beneath a leather jacket and cap pulled low over his eyes. He still couldn't get used to the stares he received, the whispers of people recognizing him as the Winter Soldier. But he had no one to blame but himself for the atrocities he had committed under that name.

Lost in his thoughts, he almost didn't notice the woman standing in front of him until they collided, sending her papers flying in every direction. Bucky immediately bent down to help her gather her belongings, apologizing profusely.

"It's okay, really," the woman said with a smile, her eyes sparkling with kindness. Bucky couldn't help but feel a sense of warmth wash over him as he looked into her eyes.

"I'm sorry, I should've been more careful," he muttered, handing her back the last of her papers.

"It's no problem, really. Thank you for helping me," she replied, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

Bucky felt a strange pull towards her, something he hadn't felt in a long time. He couldn't explain it, but he knew he wanted to get to know this woman better. So, without thinking, he blurted out, "Can I buy you a coffee to make it up to you?"

The woman's smile widened, nodding her head in agreement. "I'd like that," she said, and just like that, they found themselves seated at a cozy café, sipping lattes and talking about anything and everything.

As the hours passed, Bucky found himself opening up to her in a way he hadn't with anyone else. He told her about his past, about the darkness that still haunted him, and she listened with a compassion that took his breath away.

"You're not defined by your past, Bucky. You have a chance to make a new future for yourself," she said, her hand reaching out to squeeze his. Bucky felt a pang in his chest at her words, a flicker of hope igniting within him.

Before he knew it, days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. Bucky and Y/N became inseparable, their bond growing stronger with each passing day. She showed him a side of himself he thought long buried, a side that was capable of love, of kindness, of forgiveness.

And as they lay tangled together in bed one night, Bucky realized he was in love with her. He had never thought he could feel this way again, but Y/N had healed wounds he didn't even know existed.

"I love you," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her temple. Y/N turned to look at him, tears glistening in her eyes.

"I love you too, Bucky. You've healed my wounds just as much as I've healed yours," she confessed, their hearts beating as one.

And in that moment, Bucky knew he had finally found his place in the world, by her side, forever.

Together, they had found their happily ever after.

💕❤️💕

[kat651]

winter soldier x reader (enemies to lovers)

Summary: the winter soldier gets badly hurt and goes to the only person he can think of for help. Over time she somehow helps him become bucky barnes again instead of the vicious killer, causing her to fall in love with him.

You pushed the cart into the parking lot and began to unload the groceries into the trunk of your car, humming a tune as you did so. You smiled, satisfied that the last of your errands were done for the day. You then put your cart away before getting into your car.

You had the radio blasting as you drove home. It was a long drive, the closest grocery store was over an hour's drive away. You groaned as you realized your gas tank was almost empty. You pulled into the little run down gas station and got out. You were so done with the day already. You filled your tank then got back in your car, pulling away and turning the radio back on.

By the time you pulled into the gravel driveway that led to your house the sun was setting. You hopped out and immediately a lynx ran up to you, meowing. You smiled and went to the trunk, pulling out the groceries and heading inside, the cat waited on the porch. You tossed her some chicken and she scarfed it down before looking back up at you. The two of you had a strange bond. She protected your chickens from the foxes and you fed her something when she came around. She always appeared when you made bacon and you couldn't blame her. Occasionally she’d bring a friend whether it be a skunk or a raccoon, you didn't mind, the wildlife was your only company.

Once you finished feeding her, you headed back inside to put away the groceries then you went to relax. 

You walked into the living room and flicked on the light. The first thing you saw when you turned on the light was that the window was open, you never left the windows open when you weren't at home. You weren't afraid of robbers, but once you left the window open and you came home to a family of raccoons helping themselves to everything in the pantry. 

You went over to close the window and noticed blood was on the curtain and the window frame. You pulled out your gun and slowly scanned the living room. Someone was here. You noticed mud on the carpet and followed the trail over to the bathroom. You opened the door and pointed your gun into the bathroom as you turned on the light. “You…” you growled, seeing the winter soldier in your bathroom, he was clutching his side and slowly looked up at you. 

“Please…” he said in a strained voice as his legs trembled beneath him. “I-i had nowhere else to go…” he clutched his side and coughed up blood. He looked down at his hand, lifting it off his side, his hand was deep red, completely coated in blood. 

He looked back up at you and you noticed fear in his eyes. You slowly lowered your gun. “If this is a trick, I'll put a bullet through your head.”

“N-no trick…” he moaned as his legs gave out underneath him. Without thinking, you ran to him, steading him before he hit the ground. You grabbed a rag out of a drawer in the bathroom and had him hold it against his side.

You led him back out to the livingroom and had him sit in the wooden chair in the corner, blood was easier to clean off of polished wood than a leather couch. You ran down the hall to grab the first aid kit, you made sure your gun was fully loaded and cocked before you went back to him. He was still just sitting there when you approached. You set the kit down then got a bowl of water and a few more rags. 

When you came back his teeth were clenched and he was trying to grab at something on the wound. ‘Ah, don't do that, you'll make it worse…” you kicked aside the carpet and made him lay on the wooden floor. You put a pillow under his head though. 

You cut his bloody jacket and shirt away before gasping. His left arm was completely metal. You looked at the angry scar that ran along the area where the flesh and metal met you frowned. You quickly looked away and dipped the rag in the water before ringing it out. You then gently cleaned his wound. You realized he'd been hit by a bullet and grabbed out a pair of tweezers, carefully you removed the bullet. His teeth clenched and he squeezed his eyes shut as you did so and you felt sympathy for the murderous man that lay in front of you. The sympathy was short lived though. As soon as his gray-blue eyes opened you remembered he was your enemy. 

You cleaned his wound and he relaxed a little bit. You then reached into the first aid kit and pulled out a needle and thread. “I have too…” you whispered, feeling sympathy for some reason.

He closed his eyes and you pressed the nettle into his flesh, earning a pained but weak whimpered scream from the man. You felt both satisfaction and sympathy from the pained noise that came from his lips, a half grin, half grimace splaying itself across your face.   

When you finished patching him up his eyes slowly opened. The sun was completely gone now and the light of the lamp on his eyes looked like the sea. You were drawn to them, so beautiful… but you remained strong and looked elsewhere. “Come on,” you said, forging him to stand. “You can sleep on the couch… I guess… in the morning I want you gone.” 

You led him to the couch. “Do you understand? I don't want to see you anywhere on my property when I wake up.”

He nodded and you walked off. You paused before leaving. “Is it too hard for you to say ‘thank you’?” you asked, turning around. He was already asleep, shivering slightly. You sighed and brought the first aid kit to the closet and grabbed out a blanket as well as a shirt that had belonged to your late brother. You grabbed a clean bandage as well, just in case. 

You walked back to the living room and covered the shivering man with it. A soft smile spread across his lips and you paused, he was actually kind of handsome… no, really handsome. You growled at yourself. He was still your enemy. You lay the blue and gray flannel on the chair along with the bandage. Then you went to your room and locked the door before laying the loaded gun on your bedside table. You changed into your pajamas and immediately fell asleep.

.-.-.

In the morning, you woke and stretched before stepping into your slippers and taking a shower. You rose before the sun. always.

You smiled as the warm water ran down your skin, you washed your hair and body before stepping out of the shower and drying off. You slipped on your light blue sweatpants and gray sports bra along with your slippers before heading to the kitchen. You paused when you saw the man you'd helped last night still asleep on your couch. You were about to scold him and kick him out then he began to whimper and flinch. “No, please… no stop…” he clutched the blanket, squirming. “No…” you noticed the pain on his face. Then a tear ran down his cheek. “Please, it hurts…”

You walked over and cautiously placed a hand on his shoulder, gently waking him. His eyes opened and settled on you. “It's only a dream,” you whispered. 

He slowly sat up and he scanned your small figure. You then remembered you were only wearing your sports bra and turned pink, trying to cover yourself. 

Apparently he had more manners than you thought because he looked down at his lap and made a motion telling you to go. You ran off and grabbed a sweater before returning. When you came back he was staring at the floor.  He looked up at you, his eyes meeting yours. “I… thank you…for last night…”

You smiled softly. “You're welcome,” you whispered, gently tucking a stray hair behind his ear. He leaned into your touch and you paused. He was beautiful like this. He looked so gentle too, opposed to his usual self. You slowly pulled your hand away and straightened. He looked up at you. “I have to leave don't I?”

You hesitated before kneeling down to check his wound. He’d bleed quite a bit last night. “I… why don't you take a shower and we’ll see how you are after that?”

He nodded and slowly stood. You showed him where the other shower was. “I'll get you something to wear…” you said as he turned on the water. 

You ran and grabbed the flannel then grabbed some sweat pants from the closet along with a towel. You tossed the towel inside the door before a thought crept into your mind. You ran and threw the clothes into the dryer, warming them a bit before placing them in the bathroom. 

You paused as you smelled your brother’s body wash. Tears welled in your eyes but you quickly brushed them away, it was just soap.

You headed to the kitchen and started the coffee maker and grabbed out a large pan, placing it on the stove. You put some butter in the pan before grabbing out some eggs and a few other things. You were cooking for two people this time. He was technically your guest. An unwanted guest but a guest nonetheless. 

You flipped the eggs then stiffened when you felt an arm around you. It was him. You smelled your brother's body wash and forced yourself not to whimper. “Thank you again for… all of this.”

You relaxed a little and leaned into his strange hug. “Are you hungry?” you asked, motioning to the eggs and bacon in the pan. 

“I… yeah…”

You smiled and reached above your head, grabbing down three plates.you moved the food onto the plates. You put one egg on the third plate, which was smaller than the others and two pieces of bacon. You carried the two large plates over to the table before grabbing silverware and setting them at the plates. You grabbed cups and poured orange juice as well. “Sit, eat.”

He looked at you with surprise. “At the table? I don't have to wait till you're done?”

This time tears did fill your eyes. You pulled him over to the table and had him sit. “Eat, i'll join you in just a moment.” 

You walked over and grabbed the smaller plate and opened the window, setting the plate on a fold down table you'd built. “Here, kitty kitty!”

The lynx came running up and sat down as you scooted the plate closer to her.. She meowed and happily ate the food. You filled a little bowl with milk and set that on the table as well before going over and sitting down. You watched quietly as he ate. Finally you reached out and grabbed his hands. “Hey, slow down… no one is going to take that from you…”

“You're not?”

You gave his hand a squeeze. “No, I made it for you…”

He slowed a little and you ate along with him, watching as he relaxed a little. This poor man had been tortured and abused for how long? You had no idea but you wanted him to feel safe for once. “I don't think I ever told you my name… I'm y/n.”

He smiled slightly, looking up. The smile quickly faded. “I don't think I have a name… if i did i've forgotten it…”

You frowned. “I'm sorry…”

He shrugged and slowly, hesitantly reached to grab the glass of orange juice. The whole time his eyes were trained on you. You grabbed your own glass and took a sip. He did the same, a smile spreading across his face he took another sip. So he liked orange juice. Good to know. 

The cat jumped off the table and into the house. It was rare for her to enter. She cautiously walked the man sitting across from you. He stiffened. 

“It's ok,” you said, placing your hand on his. “She's just curious, let her sniff you.”

He watched as the cat sniffed him before meowing and walking off.

“See? You're alright.”

He nodded and watched as the cat walked off. 

You took the empty plates and put them in the dishwasher. The cat ran over and licked them clean, causing you to laugh. 

You then looked over to where the ‘winter soldier’ sat. He was just looking at his hands, clearly afraid to look anywhere else. 

You walked over to the coffee maker and poured a glass into your cup with Thor's hammer on it. “Coffee?” you asked. 

He looked up. “What?”

You held up the pot. “Coffee?”

He hesitated then nodded. You grabbed down another cup, this one had a captain america shield on it. 

You walked over and set the cups down before going over to the fridge and grabbing the creamer. You turned and watched him take a sip, immediately making a face. You couldn't help but laugh as you walked over and poured creamer in both cups. “Now try it…” 

He took a hesitant sip before smiling. 

“Better?”

He nodded and you smiled softly. If he wasn't your enemy you'd probably offer him a long hug. But you didn't instead you picked up your cup and walked into the living room. He followed you like a lost puppy.

You sat and grabbed the tv remote, putting on tangled, it had been a while since you'd seen that one. You figured he'd get bored of the movie and leave but he was glued to the screen, laughing as Paskel shoved his tongue inside Flynn's ear. You watched him from the corner of your eye, he was adorable. 

You stood and left him to watch the movie while you did a load of laundry. You also now knew that you couldn't kick him out so you busied yourself with the task of vacuuming the guest room, making the bed, and hanging up some of your brother’s clothes. He'd need something to wear until you could get him some new clothes.

You felt a presence watching you as you hung up a shirt. You looked over to see him standing in the doorway. The movie must have ended. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

He hesitated. “M-my side hurts but im ok…”

You dropped what you were doing and got him some pain killers. The ones left over from one of your brothers surgeries. “Here, take these…” you said, handing him the pills and the glass of water. 

That night, you gently tucked him in after he’d sheepishly asked you too. “Of course…” you said. “Do you want a kiss on your forehead too?” you’d meant it as a joke but when he nodded you pressed your lips on his forehead. 

When you pulled back, there was a smile on his face. “Goodnight…” you muttered, tucking away his stray hair. 

“y/n?”

“Yes?”

“Will you leave the door cracked? Please?”

You noticed anxiety in his eyes and nodded, you then ran to the bathroom and opened the top drawer, pulling out the extra night light. You plugged it in outside the door before poking your head in the door. “Better?”

He nodded and rolled onto his side, falling asleep. 

.-.-.

You woke in the middle of the night and sat bolt right up, screaming was coming from the other room. You jumped out of the bed and bolted down the hall. You opened the door and found him tangled in the blanket, thrashing. “No please, it hurts… stop please…” 

You ran to him and gently woke him. His eyes scanned the room and when they landed on you he was covered in sweat. He grabbed you and pulled you to him, crying softly, hiding his face in your shoulder. 

“Hey… you're safe.”

“P-please dont… dont send me- don't send me back to- to them…” he whimpered. 

“Shhh, you're safe, I won't make you leave…” you whispered, gently rubbing circles on his back. “Do you want to talk about it?”

He hesitated before falling into a ramble. “They hurt me, they still do, they took my mind… i-i can't remember much from my life before, just images, it's fuzzy. I-i want my mind back, i want to know who i am… who i was before-” he began to sob again. “It hurts. It hurts so much…”

You rubbed his back softly, “i have no idea what that must be like… im so sorry…” you whispered as you continued to gently rub his back. 'Do you want me to stay in here with you? At Least till you fall asleep?”

“Y-you'd do that?” 

“Yeah, I will.”

“Ok, yeah, stay…”

You pulled him to lay down, holding him close to you as he finished crying. 

You meant to leave after he had fallen asleep, you really did, but his soft whimpers and random little twitches caused you to change your mind. You ended up falling asleep while holding him close.

When you woke, he was still asleep. You slowly rose and headed to the kitchen, you planned to surprise him with breakfast in bed. But first you poured milk into a bowl for the cat.

You decided on oatmeal. You peeled and cut some peaches to add to the oatmeal while it cooked. Once it was done, you added a splash of milk, some cinnamon and the peaches. You placed the bowls on a tray along with some orange juice since he seemed to like it so much last time. 

You opened the door and placed the tray on the bedside table. You set the cups next to it. “Hey soldier, time to get up…”

“Bucky.”

“What?”

“That's my name… Bucky Barnes… or atleast, that's what I remember being called before all of that…”

You smiled. “Well Bucky, I made us breakfast…” you whispered, grabbing the tray and placing it across his lap.

He smiled and put his metal arm around you before taking a bite. A smile instantly spread across his face. “This seems… familiar somehow…” 

“That does but the eggs don't?”

“Well i remember having eggs before, not very often but i do remember them…” 

You leaned closer to him as he ate. “I'm glad you came to me for help…”

“Me too…”

When you finished eating he took the bowls and you grabbed the cups before following with curiosity. You watched him go to the kitchen and rinse the bowels before putting them in the dishwasher, causing you to smile. He was too sweet.

When he turned, there were tears in his eyes. “I know why it was so familiar… my mother would buy peaches when she had money to spare…” 

You set the cups down and walked over to him, gently pulling him into a hug. “Bucky, i'm so sorry…”

He slowly tilted your chin up. “You're actually a lot like my mother, she would never turn away a broken stray like me…”

You pulled him closer. “Well I happen to like broken things,” you said, looking over at the broken teapot you'd turned into a flower pot. 

“Why?”

“Because… you can always give a broken thing a new purpose,” you said pointing to the teapot. You then picked up a vase, it was made from all different types of broken glass. “Broken is… beautiful.”

You put the vase down and pulled Bucky in for a hug. “Stay here, I like your company…”

He hugged you back. “Really?”

“Yeah. I do.” 

.-.-.

You sat reading a book while Bucky took a shower. You slowly breathed in the smell of your brother’s body wash, this time a smile spread across your face. It suited Bucky well; the earthen smells seemed perfect for his personality. When Bucky came into the living room, he was shirtless. “y/n… I think one of the stitches came out…” he was looking down at his wound that was healing quite well.

You walked over to bucky and looked at his wound. “Well the stitches should start falling out as you heal… it looks ok to me…” you mumbled, gently tapping the skin around his wound. “Does this hurt?”

“Mmm… not really, I guess a little…”

“Alright… as long as it's not terrible pain, then I'm not worried.” You looked up at Bucky and smiled. “Well, what do you want to do today?” 

Bucky paused before pulling you into a hug. “I don't know… what do you want to do?”

“I've got an idea… go grab a shirt.”

“What, you don't like all of this?” he asked, pointing to his abs.

You threw a pillow at his face, “were going outside, i'd put a shirt on.” you said, shaking your head and laughing. 

Bucky went and grabbed a shirt, laughing as you went and picked up the throw pillow. 

When he came back wearing a shirt, your face fell slightly. So maybe you did like his abs. Not that you'd ever tell him that. “Ready?” he asked.

“Just a moment…” you opened the cupboard and grabbed down two water bottles, filling them. “Ok… now I'm ready, let's go…” 

He slipped on his boots, the ones he'd been wearing the day he ended up in your house via the window. You smiled and led him outside and to the back, passed the chickens and cow. “Come on, it's this way…” you led him up a hill,

checking to make sure he was still behind you though. You led him to a little shack and he raised a brow, clearly confused. 

You pulled up a board on the floor and revealed a staircase. “Come on, it's down this way…” 

He stepped down, closing the hatch behind him. 

“You're actually the first person I've ever shown this too…” you said, a soft smile on your face as you stepped onto the stone floor of an underground cave. 

Bucky gasped and looked around with wide eyes. “Wow…” the cave was full of underground moss that gave off a faint glow. There were crystals growing on the walls. “This is beautiful…” he looked over at the little pond full of glowing fish. “Wow…”

You slipped off your shoes, dipping your feet into the water. Bucky looked over when he heard a soft splash before taking off his boots as well. “Glad you wore a shirt?” you asked as he shivered slightly. 

“Yeah i- the waters warm… really warm…”

You smiled and nodded. “Want to go for a swim?”

Bucky looked at you surprised as you tossed your shirt to the side then realized you were wearing a bathing suit underneath. “You planned this didn't you?”

You nodded and waded into the water. “Come on!”

Bucky tossed his shirt aside and jumped into the water, a smile on his face. 

“How long can you hold your breath?”

“I don't know… why?”

“Follow me…” you said, diving into the water with Bucky right behind.

You swam through a little hole and came up out of the water into a little air pocket. Bucky followed and blinked in shock. “Wow…” the whole pocket of this cave was glowing with blue crystals and moss. 

.-.-.

When you got back to the cabin and dried off, Bucky pulled you to the couch, snuggling up to you. “I'm still cold…” was his excuse when you opened your mouth to speak. 

You smiled and nuzzled closer, secretly wanting to cuddle up to him.

“y/n?”

“What is it?”

“I-i love you…”

You blushed and opened your mouth to answer. “I love you too…”

Bucky placed a soft kiss on your temple before his eyes slid closed and he drifted off. You smiled and closed your eyes as well, falling asleep in his chest.

-.-.-

That had been a few months ago.

You sat on the couch, leaning into Bucky's embrace. “I love you…”

Bucky smiled and pressed a kiss on your forehead. I love you too.” he mumbled. Holding you close.