#The Midwest 👍

[chicago-geniza]

Tried cheese curds for the first time. They tasted so good and my stomach hurts so bad 👍

[cementcornfield]

good lord my inbox is a mess lmao

[sopheadraws]

Devastation in the groupchat. Man.

[VD: A screen recording of a iMessage audio chat. The audio is below a screenshot of a Tumblr poll by @/slutsge with the title, "where are you from and how do you pronounce 'Appalachia'". The options are "app-a-latch-a" (42.9%), "app-a-lay-shuh" (45.8%), and "some other way???" (11.2%). The speaker has a female voice with a General American accent and she sounds mildly distressed. She says, "Nooo! Appalachia my beloved- you can't be saying it like that! You can't be doing that to me- It's App-uh-latch-uh! It's App-uh-lat-" /end VD]

[clamityganon]

talking about the superbowl and i said i was disappointed that philly lost. some guy asks me why and it took all my willpower to not tell him that i have an unhealthy attachment to the characters from hit sitcom it’s always sunny in philadelphia

[vigilaent]

my cat will not stop having asthma attacks so i may be a bit scarce

[comradecowplant]

Chappell Roan's musical stylings still don't super ignite my soulfire but now having caught good luck babe & hot to go on the radio several times this week i admit the songs have grown on me quite a bit. perfectly nice fun indiepop earworms!

[beerdobaradoblog]

Midwest Martyr - Echos (From the Jam Space)

[number1nedstan]

have yall heard this?????

[oysterie]

i just wanna work in some municipality wastewater lab and Jesus Christ the phone keeps ringing but I'm on break anyways do that or smthn aligned for a long while and work on a master's and in a couple decades teach some community college class and be nice who gives a shit. 👍

[thebibliosphere]

I've been meaning to do this update on Payhip for a while; I just haven't had the mental capacity to deal with anything admin, but! It is now possible to send copies of the Hunger Pangs ebooks and audiobooks as gifts!

(It was always possible before if you exploited the email function, but now it's like, official 👍)

ID: Two images side by side. They show a screenshot from Payhip's checkout page set against a rainbow glitter background. In the first image, the form prompts the viewer to fill in their own details. On the second image, the "give as a gift" box is checked, which shows additional options, such as entering the recipient's email and the ability to add a personalized message.

Sorry for the weird sizing. I'm using the same images for insta and couldn't be bothered to crop it for Tumblr. Because I'm professional like that.

Anyway. Valentines might be over, but it's never too late to give the gift of DRM-free vampires and werewolves kissing as they help an all-powerful magic wielder save the world from ecological disaster:

[marciliedonato]

it's literally just 2000s emo and alt rock but i mean there's also at least 1 (one) nickelback song in there so i guess it checks out ??? 😭😭

just saw the funniest thing on spotify....

2000s DAD ROCK ?????

[dallasgallant]

Ponyboy is the final boss of the “Midwest goodbye” he’s quiet on his own but once he gets started and is comfortable he could talk for a real long time. Darry is usually the one to initiate leaving but pony is the one that keeps them longer until he has to go “that’s right champ” and basically shove him out the door or they’ll never leave. Soda saves them by the “it’s been real nice 👍” before closing the door.

[vladdyissues]

Found this and immediately thought of our favorite cheesehead. Are Midwest memes a potentially fun source of inspiration?

Detroit Lions fan: YEAH YOUR 🧀 HAT IS GREAT 👍 BUT MINE'S GRATER 😜

Vlad Masters: *racks his arm like a shotgun*

[chibishortdeath]

I was at one point gonna make an actually colored nice finished drawing for this, but I’m not feeling it and the trend will probably be completely dead by the time that I do if it isn’t already ugh. So you get doodle Miku now :3!

Anyway uh weird middle of absolutely nowhere in the rural US Midwest Miku. I’ll mini rant about it a little bit under the cut 👍

I literally had to look up my own culture for this cause I couldn’t think of anything 💀💀💀💀💀. Especially not anything that actually applies to me, if that makes sense. Minus the fishing pole, this is the closest to my current experience I could get. Her expression is very reminiscent of the experience of being out here tbh.

Apparently ranch dressing is a thing???? I didn’t know cause I really don’t like ranch. Same with casseroles. Fishing is a local hobby, but I don’t have a fishing license and don’t like being around water. So is fixing old cars, but I’m not strong enough to do any of that. There isn’t a consistent accent or slang here, it’s just a bunch of stuff from everywhere else. Not really distinct clothing. A couple bands are from nearby states, but they’re not associated with them much. Uh some sports teams I guess. I don’t watch sports. Everywhere for miles looks the same cause it’s all corn and closest place to do anything is in a big faraway city and involves spending money you probably don’t have and shouldn’t.

There’s not a whole lot tbh.

Idk, this whole experience was basically “wow Miku around the world? So cool! I wanna draw Miku :D!!!! Oh hey wait, where I live is very bleak and bland actually—“ 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

[doueverwonder]

Michigan doing the my family and their problems trend but with the rest of the Midwest (i don't have tiktok so if it's been forever since this was a thing just shhhhh); I present the captions he'd give them all.

North & South Dakota: Identical twins. get really mad when people confuse them. make absolutely no effort to distinguish themselves.

Nebraska: Hasn't drank water since kool-aid was invented

Kansas: Has actual opinions on the Wizard of Oz animated sequel Journey Back to Oz (1972)

Minnesota: Wears shorts & socks w/sandals in negative temps

Wisconsin: alcoholic 👍

Iowa: Slipknot fan

Missouri: on his 3rd identity crisis of the week (it's Tuesday)

Illinois: introvert forced to be an extrovert

Indiana: the least self confidence of anyone you'll ever meet

Ohio: from Ohio (the worst one imo)

[crazylittlejester]

DAILY BRAINROT

As it turns out, I needed some sleep and potatoes, so now I'm feeling much more like myself again. 👍

Speaking of potatoes... I love the idea that Twilight is Appalachian (or that Ordon is the Hyrulean equivalent of Appalachia). Which means he probably eats a lot of potatoes at home because potatoes are awesome, and I have yet to meet an Appalachian household that doesn't have potatoes. Sometimes I get homesick for potatoes, and you can't convince me Twilight doesn't feel the same way. Pumpkins are great and all, but they can't replace the ridiculous amount of potato dishes old ladies bring to potlucks. Also, I don't think there are any potatoes in BotW/TotK? So if that's true, then Wild's been tragically potato-less for his entire life.

I've also decided that I desperately need to write something about Warriors being friends with some folks at a nursing home. I think he'd get along with friendly old people. Old people love talking (and gossip) and baked goods and knitting, so I think he'd fit right in. Plus, they'd totally have his back regarding Cia. There's got to be at least one elderly widow who ends up telling him how she got away with murdering her abusive ex-husband and never got caught. It's part of the agenda now.

YAY I’M GLAD YOU FEEL BETTER!!

Twi is SO midwest/Appalachia coded to me. His ass is definitely from like, the Hyrulian equivalent of southern Ohio or some shit. He would fucking love potatoes, you could literally just give him an entire baked potato with a little salt on it and it could be enough to fix him, doesn’t even have to be anything special or fancy. You go in his little tree house, open his pantry, and he’s got like 3 entire fucking boxes of potatoes in there, bless his heart (I’m now picturing him as Wolfie in Wild’s era, absolutely fucking DEVASTATED at the sheer lack of potatoes)

You’ve somehow manage to say shit I’ve been thinkin about for days before I have the opportunity to put it into a post alkjsljklkjslkdj, but as someone who works at a nursing home, I completely fucking agree. They love him because he’s sweet and polite, but also he’s a devious yapper and he lives for drama. You can bet your ass he’s parked right next to Nancy and Susan with his jaw on the floor listening to them talking SHIT about people, occasionally chiming in with a “she did NOT.” He’s getting 60 year old gossip and he’s absolutely loving it. I also know he’d have a favorite resident, and I know it’d be the sweetest little old lady who all the other workers just adore because she’s so nice, and she just tells Wars and only Wars about how she killed her horribly abusive husband (because you’re SO right about that there’s gotta be at LEAST one) and then pats his hand and says some shit like “We can kill your abuser too, dear. A girls trip, if you will” and he’d laugh his ass off. Also he gets to just?? Do arts and crafts?? And knit and gossip?? WHILE watching the golden girls?? AND he gets to help make cookies?? and just HELP people?? AS HIS JOB?? that is like, the IDEAL job for him I fear. That’s like everything he could ever want, he’d thrive in that environment