#The Adventures of Zapdos and Its Tiny Human

[kumeko]

A/N: For the Trainers of Teyvat zine! I am so many gen behind in recognizing all of these pokemon but I’m still amazed by how many new designs they’re able to come up with. I also haven’t written a pure action/adventure tale in ages.

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As usual, it was a stormy night on the Stormbearer mountains. Some people believed that the mythical Zapdos or Barbatos made their home on its remote peaks, and the storms protected them from human sight. Whether or not those Pokémon existed, Kaeya was certain they couldn’t be found here. He had been staking out the place for weeks now and the only thing he’d learned was that there really was a thing as too much rain.

Still, tonight it looked like his hard work had finally paid off. Kaeya peeked out of a crevasse. In the shadows of the mountain, it was hard to see, especially at night. Volbeat and Illumise drifted through the air, their miniscule glows lighting up tiny swatches of wilderness. The rest remained shrouded in darkness. Luckily, it wasn’t raining, otherwise it would have been impossible to see.

As it was, he had to squint as he watched a figure scurry toward the mountain. They stopped at a recess in the mountain’s sheer walls. A furtive glance and they disappeared into a hidden cave.

“Bingo,” Kaeya hummed. On his shoulder, his Zorua gave a small yip as she pressed against his neck. All their skulking paid off. “We found them.”

There was only one group that would be in the mountains right now. Only one group that would be sneaking around at night and disappearing off the grid.

Team Abyss.

Kaeya had finally found their local base. “Let’s see what they’re up to.” He patted his Zorua’s head. She was a big pup now, and it wouldn’t be long before she was too heavy for him to carry. “Ready?”

She yipped again before glowing. Kaeya watched his hands slim, his skin pale, as an illusion fell over him. It didn’t take long for him to realize just who he had turned into: a red-headed member of Team Abyss whom Jean had caught recently. Jessie, if he remembered her name correctly.

Kaeya chuckled as he turned his dainty hand over. “I don’t think I can pull off her voice, partner. Try the other one.”

Zorua brushed against his neck, her black and red fur tickling his skin, and his hand returned to its former size. His hair was still blue. He ran a hand through the shorter strands. “What a funny coincidence.”

Patting Zorua one last time, he crept up to the spot he’d watched earlier. It looked like another part of the mountain, just another small crack in the ancient rock. But Kaeya knew better and he stepped into the shadows. The crack widened, until it was clear that it was an illusion in play. Another Zorua, perhaps, or maybe a more powerful psychic Pokémon.

For all of Team Abyss’s foiled thefts, they still had plenty of stolen Pokémon at their disposal.

The walls were man-made despite their roughly hewn appearance. As he followed the tunnel deeper and deeper, Kaeya noticed a small, golden spot ahead. It grew brighter with each step until finally he stood in a golden cavern, light spilling out into every corner. Two guards relaxed at the other end, standing in front of a small wooden door on a wall. His way inside.

“James?” one of the guards asked, incredulous. “Is that you?”

Provided he got past the guards of course. Kaeya smiled nervously, waving his hand weakly as he approached the pair. He raised his voice, adjusting the pitch to match what James’ should have been. “Y-yeah, it’s me.”

“Ugh, why are you back?” the second guard grumbled, glaring at him. “I don’t even know why the higher-ups won’t just get rid of you.”

“Come on, don’t be like that.” The first guard patted his back. “We can use all the help we can get.”

“It’s not like he’s really helping.” The other guard wrinkled his nose in disgust. “Their team gets caught like every other day.”

“It serves as a distraction.” Realizing that ‘James’ was alone, the first guard turned back to him and glanced around curiously. “Where are the others?”

“They’re still stuck in jail!” Kaeya wailed, his hands pressed to his chest. “They released me early and I don’t know where to wait and—”

“Right, right, got it.” The first guard held up his hand as though to physically hold back his words. “Just go on in.”

“They’ll be released soon, right?” Kaeya sniffled as he inched his way forward. He wiped a tear from his eye. “Right?”

“Yeah, yeah, they will. Just hurry up already,” the second guard grumbled, all but shoving Kaeya through the door. “Every. Single. Fricking. Time.”

Kaeya hunched over slightly, shuffling forward until the door closed. The second he heard a soft click as the lock slid back in place, he straightened and smirked.

That was far easier than he’d expected.

-x-

In all honesty, Kaeya hadn’t expected to do proper fieldwork. He was used to his sources coming to him, not the other way around. That was even more true now that the Favonius Police were flooded with report after report on Team Abyss sightings and evil doings.

Even the studious, workaholic Jean had looked like she’d reached her limit a week ago. Exhausted and stressed, she rubbed her forehead as she examined the most recent report. From his desk next to hers, Kaeya could see the dark bags under her eyes, the tired slump of her shoulders. It was a rare sight for Jean to actually show her fatigue.

Even though they were partners, she often tried to keep up her disciplined appearance. In many ways, she was like his former partner, Diluc.

Perhaps it was his fate to get stuck with serious people.

“Nurse Barbara won’t be happy, you know,” he said, breaking the silence.

It took Jean a few minutes to realize he was talking to her. She glanced at him over her report, her brow raised. “Why?”

He tapped his forehead. “If you scowl any longer, those wrinkles are going to be permanent.”

“Right.” Jean sighed again, not falling for the bait this time. Truly, she was overworked.

He dropped his teasing smirk. “What’s the latest?”

“Another sighting of Team Abyss in the Mondstadt ruins.” She ran a hand through her hair, her nails digging into her scalp roughly. “I have no idea what they’re up to. The usual suspects aren’t talking but it must be something big.”

“Isn’t it always with them?” Kaeya scoffed. Still, what she’d said matched his own reports. Team Abyss had always been up to no good, but it seemed whatever they were planning was finally coming to a head. He glanced at Jean, taking her in one more time.

No doubt she’d run herself ragged over this. She was earnest to a fault. Diluc had been like that once. In a sense, he still was, even if he tried to pretend otherwise.

Kaeya sighed. He’d always had a soft spot for earnest people. Perhaps because it was something he utterly lacked. Standing up, he stretched his arms above him. “I might have a contact I can check,” he lied.

Jean watched him hopefully. “You do?”

If she looked at him like that, he’d have to try his best, wouldn’t he? “Give me a few days.”

-x-

And now, a week later, here he was, walking through the doors of Team Abyss. He was in the center of the mountain, but his surroundings looked more like a regular office. All sleek, grey walls, fluorescent lighting, and white tiled floors; this looked more impressive than the Favonius headquarters.

Fortunately, there weren’t too many members wandering about. Fewer still that wanted to stop him for a chat. It seemed James wasn’t all that popular amongst his coworkers. That worked in his favour; Kaeya wasn’t sure how long he could keep up the voice before it cracked.

The first few rooms he passed were ordinary. A break room, a cafeteria, a lounge. People milled about, chatting as they took a break from their nefarious deeds. The next set of rooms were filled with paper pushers. With Zorua cloaking him with invisibility, Kaeya snuck in and out of these rooms, scanning any open papers for anything relevant.

For the most part, he only found what he already knew or inconsequential items: future raid sites, membership counts, team divisions. Useful info any other time but utterly unimportant right now.

The twelfth door was locked. Kaeya smirked. Locked doors meant something worth hiding. Pulling out a lock pick from his pocket, he fiddled with the keyhole. After a few seconds, he heard a satisfying click. “There we go,” he murmured, twisting the doorknob open.

Inside was what appeared to be another office. One for a manager, most like; the plush carpet and fancy paintings spoke of wealth and power. Kaeya slipped in, locking the door behind him as he studied the place.

Zorua dropped the invisibility and leaned against his head.

“Good girl,” Kaeya praised, gently picking her up and setting her on the desk. “Rest for now.”

She was so tired she didn’t even respond, merely flopped on the stiff surface and fell asleep. With any luck, she’d be recharged by the time he had to leave this room. If not, well, Kaeya always kept a Plan B to escape.

For now, though, he had a room to investigate. Kaeya quietly opened the top desk drawer and rifled through it. Inside he found ledgers and an account book. Perhaps this manager handled the financial matters for the organization. Not exactly what he was after, but it would deal a big blow if Team Abyss couldn’t find any suppliers.

Pulling out his mini-camera, Kaeya took photo after photo of the pages. There were a few names he recognized, more that he didn’t—some items were imported from Liyue and Inazuma. Team Abyss had always been a worldwide organization, but Kaeya had never realized how deeply entrenched they were before. There was even a spy in the Dawn Winery and another in a funeral parlor.

“Diluc won’t like this,” he chuckled, carefully returning the ledgers back in the order he found them.

The next drawer held contracts, most of them corresponding with the ledgers. For an evil organization, they sure kept on top of their records. The last drawer was filled with receipts. “My, you even reimburse?”

Perhaps he should check the benefits Team Abyss provided. They were clearly a competitive employer.

A nearby filing cabinet only held employee records. There was nothing hidden in the potted plants lining the office. There wasn’t even a safe behind one of the portraits. Kaeya rested his hands on his hips as he considered the room.

Was this room a dud? Zorua was still sleeping and he didn’t want to overtax her as he searched for other rooms. Perhaps he could sneak around—

A small slip of paper caught his eye. It seemed to come from nowhere, the edge sticking out of the desk where it shouldn’t.

A secret compartment.

It looked like this office was hiding a few things. Kaeya crouched beside the desk, carefully feeling for a secret latch to open the compartment. Catching the edge, he pulled it open.

Inside were a few sheets of paper. Kaeya flipped through them quickly, scanning each. More requisitions, though they were all centering around the Mondstadt ruins. For the most part, they didn’t look any different than any of the other papers, nothing worth hiding separately. An invoice for a large, metal arrow, estimates for the cost of high-quality cage, a generator—

Kaeya’s blood ran cold as he put it all together.

Mondstadt ruins.

The legendary Pokémon Durin lived there.

They were going to attack and capture him. Perhaps they were planning to unleash him on the city. Kaeya flipped through the papers again, but it told him nothing about timing, scheduling, or even how far they’d gone through with their plans. The only relief was that it looked like the invoices were recent. For such high-quality items, it would take time.

The doorknob rattle, breaking him from his thoughts. “Did you check here?” a muffled voice asked.

“Not yet, but he can’t have gone far,” a second voice growled. She clicked her teeth. “I can’t believe they fell for such a simple illusion.”

“They’re idiots. That’s why they’re stuck guarding.” The first one laughed scornfully. The doorknob rattled again. “You have the key, right?”

Two women. Kaeya glanced at Zorua. There was no point in using an illusion now; the pair must have a psychic Pokémon with them. If not, well, it wasn’t like he could explain why James was here.

Only thing left to do was escape, using the element of surprise. Quietly, Kaeya recalled Zorua to her Pokéball. In her place, he called Spectrier. A tall horse, she looked gigantic in the room. She’d be even bigger in the narrow halls, enough to startle anyone following. Even more so with her purplish-gray main and ghostly hooves; Spectrier looked like she’d appeared out of a horror story.

All they had to do was run down a narrow corridor, down a straight line until they were back out in the mountains.

The second they got there, they’d be safe. There were few that could keep up with his mount’s speed, especially in the dark.

Kaeya patted her flank and whispered, “When the door opens, burst through and turn right.”

She whickered softly. It’d be a sharp turn, but they’d done it with less warning before. He mounted, leaning low against her body.

A small click sounded as the door unlocked. The doorknob turned. Kaeya gripped Spectrier’s mane.

And then, the second the door opened, he squeezed his thighs and Spectrier whinnied. That high sound was the only warning the women entering had before Spectrier charged through.

“Woah!” one shouted as she jumped to the side.

The other got clipped in the shoulder. Kaeya didn’t envy the bruise she’d wake up to. Spectrier slowed slightly as she turned, her heels clashing loudly on the tiles as she raced down the hall. People stuck their heads out of the offices before immediately jerking back as he passed.

The only thing left was the door at the end.

“Shadow Ball,” he muttered.

A small, dark ball of energy appeared in front of Spectrier. It grew bigger and bigger before she shook her head and unleashed it on the door at the end. Kaeya hoped the guards weren’t standing right in front of it as the door splintered and exploded.

He didn’t turn to check as they sprinted through the tunnel and out into the mountainside.

-x-

It was midnight when Kaeya reached Angel’s Share. Every part of him felt sore from the prolonged hide-and-seek he played with Team Abyss as they’d hunted him. He’d mistaken their tenacity and it had taken hours longer than he’d planned to make his way back into the city.

Yet, he couldn’t sleep just yet. While Kaeya had returned the papers to their compartment, it wouldn’t take long for Team Abyss to figure out just what he’d found. Or to suspect that he’d found something else. They’d move headquarters long before the Favonius Police could investigate.

And Kaeya refused to let his work go down the drain like that. That left his favourite vigilantes.

“Honey, I’m home,” Kaeya called out as he opened the bar’s door.

As expected, Diluc grimaced from behind the counter. “And here I thought I’d have a peaceful night.”

Seated at the bar in front of him, Rosaria admired her half-drunk glass of whisky. “I’ll have another.”

The rest of the bar was empty. Perfect. Kaeya smirked as he stepped in, ignoring the way his muscles ached with each step. “Aww, that’s the greeting I get? It’s enough to make a man think he’s unwelcome.”

Diluc’s glare grew more pronounced. Despite his stoic demeanor, he was just as fiery as his red hair. All Kaeya needed was to push a few buttons to elicit a reaction. Rosaria, however, continued to ignore him. As usual, she marched to the beat of her own drum, paying little attention to that which didn’t interest her. 

There were no better people for this job. Diluc hated the Abyss more than anyone. Rosaria’s devotion to the city and its inhabitants rivaled Jean’s, even if she hid in the shadows to do so.

With their combined skills, they could take down any Abyss camp without backup.

Kaeya slipped into the seat next to Rosaria and clasped his hands. Resting his chin on the back of his hands, he said, “Hey, I heard an interesting rumour. Want to hear what’s happening in the mountains?”

They’d wrap this up before Jean woke up.

[tori10rambles]

I woke up this morning to a kudos alert. @liketolaugh-dgm, who writes some DAMN good DGM fics, especially Cosmic Composite and Synchronization, gave me kudos for The Adventures of Zapdos and Its Tiny Human!?!?

I am in shock and awe that they like my Crack Treated Seriously fanfiction.

[saijspellhart]

X for the video game asks?

X: What you’d like to change about your favorite franchise?

Let’s go with Pokémon on this one since I wouldn’t change much about Zelda or Fire Emblem. So, *cracks knuckles* let’s talk about Pokémon.

Pokémon designs. This is a is subjective, and very opinionated topic. And a hot debate in the Pokémon community, but imo the Pokémon designs are getting waaaay too busy on some of the creatures. Especially the legendaries. Compare Pokémon like Lugia, Moltes, Articuno, Zapdos and Kyogre to legendaries like Zekrom, Reshiram, Ultra Necrozma, and Zamazenta. The older legendaries in gens 1-3 looked like animals, monsters, creatures that could live and breath and exist naturally in the world. But still look magnificent. Even the artificially created Mewtwo looked like he was a living creature, even if he was as alien and creepy looking as a shaved cat. But the legendaries in gen 5 and onward?? Clunky, robotic, unnatural. There’s so much loudness and craziness happening in their designs, and you could simplify half their design and they would still be freaking amazing. I have half a mind to draw simplified versions of those newer legendaries to show they can still look legendary and awesome without having a noisy busy design. They end up looking more like a deviantart OC trying to stand out, than a natural addition to the Pokémon world.

Giving Pokémon a difficulty setting. The games are waaaaaay to easy, and game freak is only making them easier, and forcing features that make the games easier. Like how in the latest installment experience share is MANDATORY. Meaning that all you Pokémon level up and grow even if you don’t use them. Which makes the game waaaay too simple. The elite four teams have less and less Pokémon. And you are at a higher level when you face them. It’s become a challenge not to over level. I want a way to make the games harder. They need to implement a hard mode for the more experienced players.

The handholding!! God dammit, it gets worse with every gen. Gen 6 was already mega stifling with its 4 friend/rivals, and they followed you everywhere, and led you around a lot. But then gen 7 just takes that to a new level with Hau and company. And that game just holds your hand, or better yet leads you around by your nose, and there is exposition and talking every 30 seconds. They NEVER leave you alone, not until you beat the game. And then Gen 8 can be arguably just as bad. Let me explore! Let me figure things out! Let me find the story on my own. Maybe hide some clues with the NPCs but make it my choice if I decide to talk to them or ignore them. And for god’s sake make some of the cutscenes and dialogue skippable!! All the annoying talking, and hand holding makes for a miserable experience. A problem the older Pokémon games NEVER had. Because they trusted that you were competent enough to explore and find the adventure and story on your own.

The animation. The animation quality of the newer Pokémon games has just been stale. It was new and fresh and exciting in gen 6. And they’ve just reused the same animations ever since. Both humans, and Pokémon move the same, shake their hands the same, and attack the same. In seven years the Pokémon company hasn’t bothered to improve their animation since they made the jump to 3D graphics in 2013. They’ve only spread some polish on the existing designs. It’s frankly sad, and boring, and frustrating. They even halved the amount of Pokémon available in gen 8 and promised that with less Pokémon it means they can make more expressive animations on the Pokémon that they do include. But that was a lie. The animations are all the same as they were in 2013. And youtubers have a myriad of videos showing animations side by side, and showing that the Pokémon company didn’t make any effort at improving the animations.

The story. The stories in the games are just the worst part about the games. Like they all suck. The latest one in gen 8 just makes absolutely no fucking sense, and interrupts the gym challenge quest with boring detours more than anything else. They are pathetic and my least favorite part of any Pokémon game. I was more invested in Team Rocket’s tiny story in gens 1 and 2, or Maxie and Archie’s rivalry in gen 3 than I am in the drivel they are regurgitating in gen’s 7 and 8. And arguably the story in gen 6 wasn’t much more interesting. It was passable, but unresolved.

Conclusion: Those are a lot of things I don’t like and would change, but if you ask me about the things I love that list would be much much longer. I could wax poetry about the things I love in a Pokémon game.

[tori10rambles]

The Aftermath

So… long time no see. I’d say sorry, but I’m a slow writer on the best of days, and Zapdos-Muse abandoned me for a bit there.

In apology, have a story. This one, which is the aftermath of Red Human, Blue Human, Tiny Human, R Human, as suggested by anonymous reviewer Virginia on ao3. I’m in the middle of writng another one which is halfway done and should be finished by next week, God willing

Oh, and as far as this universe is concerned, Blanche is nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns.

As always, you can find the preferred version on ao3.

Summary (from ao3):

Tiny Human beamed at Zapdos. “Zapdos, this is Blanche.” He pointed towards Blue Human. “And this is Candela.” Tiny Human gestured towards Red Human. “Blanche, Candela, this is Zapdos. No, I don’t know why it let me think it was a Fearow, or why it answered to Fearow, but it’s my best friend, my first and oldest Pokémon.”

Or: what happens after Zapdos fights off Team Rocket. the sequel to Red Human, Blue Human, Tiny Human, R Human

Zapdos was quite proud of itself as the R Humans (1) recalled their Pokémon and ran away. It made sure the R Humans were well out of its sight before gently gliding down to Tiny Human and his friends.

Now that the R Humans were gone, Red Human(2) and Blue Human(3) were watching it carefully. Zapdos approved of their apprehension. It was a legendary after all.

And of course, Tiny Human didn’t care, and ran to it, baby pokémon still wrapped in his arms.

Huh, it was a Cleffa.

Hopefully, Tiny Human wouldn’t decide to keep it. If he did, Mr. Iggles would probably get its paws on her and turn her into his protégé.

Like they needed more terrifying pokémon pretending to be cute and weak.

Zapdos ignored the thought in favor of running its beak through Tiny Human’s hair.

“Thanks Fearow!” Tiny Human rubbed its beak in gratitude, Cleffa cradled in Tiny Human’s other arm. “I really wasn’t looking forward to letting Team Rocket get away.”

Zapdos decided that Tiny Human was allowed to call it Fearow for as long as he continued rubbing its beak.

“However! That doesn’t mean it’s okay to try and electrocute them! I realize they made you angry, but that’s no excuse for trying to kill them!” Tiny Human scolded.

Zapdos took the scolding with minimal grace. That is to say, it reared back and stared at Tiny Human flatly.

Like he had any room to talk! Tiny Human was scary when he got angry. Not that he scared Zapdos. Nope. It was just obvious when other humans ran away whimpering in fear when Tiny Human began to get mad.

Plus, Tiny Human should know by now that anyone attempting to harm him was going to face its wrath!

“Uh, Spark. I don’t think you should have said that,” Red Human said as she backed away.

“Quiet Candela. I’m not done yet,” Tiny Human snapped without turning to look at his friend. “You aren’t the most accurate when you’re angry! What if you had hit us? Or worse, Cleffa?”

Cleffa, who had thus far been silent, waved at the Legendary with a smile. Obviously, it had more faith in Zapdos than Tiny Human did at the moment.

Although… Zapdos supposed Tiny Human had a point. It did have a tunnel vision problem, which probably helped Tiny Human’s childhood assumption that it was a Fearow.

Zapdos lowered its head and gently ran its beak over Cleffa’s head in apology. It received a hug in return, so Zapdos knew it was forgiven.

Tiny Human sighed, “I realize that you’re protective, and you meant well, but do something like this and I will make you go on a Poképuff free diet for two months, understood?”

Zapdos nodded wildly. Anything but the Poképuffs!

“Good.” Then, Tiny Human rubbed its beak comfortingly. “I know I was upset, but you did do a good job, so I suppose I can get you a Poképuff or two when we get back to the lab.”

Zapdos cawed a cheer. Yes! Poképuffs! Maybe the ones with Oran Berries? Ooh, or the ones with Sitrus Berries!

Blue Human coughed, turning everyone’s attention towards them and Red Human, who were somewhere between shocked and manic. “Spark… what’s going on?”

“Yeah! I mean, how did you capture Zapdos! And how did you manage to mistake it for a Fearow!” Red Human was not quiet yelling, but her natural volume was loud, and her tone signified that she would not be denied answers.

Blue Human’s stare told Zapdos that they too would like answers.

Tiny Human sighed, “Okay, I realize I have a lot to explain, but can we get back to the labs first? Cleffa needs a checkup.”

Zapdos glared at the other two humans. Whatever questions they had could be answered after the hatchling was checked on.

Red Human and Blue Human agreed, and so the three humans and two pokémon made their way back to the Shiny Building(4).

Tiny Human attempted to recall Zapdos, but it escaped the moment after it had been recalled. Besides, it wasn’t like anyone else was around to gawk. It would return when it reached the Shiny Building.

Once Zapdos was recalled and the Cleffa was handed off to one of its Followers who promised to bring it to a Chansey Human (5), Tiny Human brought Red Human and Blue Human to his roosting chamber.

Red Human and Blue Human became more antsy as time passed and their questions remained unanswered, to Zapdos’ amusement. It was killing them that they couldn’t get their questions answered yet.

Tiny Human locked the door to his nesting chamber (6) and released Zapdos, who was immediately bombarded by various members of Tiny Human’s brood (7).

Tesla and Volt each grabbed hold of one of its wings and dragged Zapdos to the large nest (8) in the center of Tiny Human’s nesting chamber. Once Zapdos was nestled in the center, it opened one wing. Tesla and Volt scampered underneath Zapdos’ wing, leaving a large spot between them. Pikaboo curled up next to Volt, and Mr. Iggles took one look at the frazzled Tiny Human and his friends before dragging Tiny Human to the nest, where he collapsed in the space between Tesla and Volt. Once Mr. Iggles made itself home in Tiny Human’s lap, Zapdos closed its wing, cocooning Tiny Human and his brood.

“Just take a seat guys, this might take a while.” Tiny Human said as he curled further into his pokémon.

Red Human and Blue Human took up spots at the edge of the nest, close enough that they could hear and be comfortable, but not within touching distance of the cuddle pile.

“Okay. So you have a Zapdos. You have had a Zapdos since you were five, and mistook him for a Fearow. How does that work!?” Red Human began.

Zapdos clacked its beak in warning. Zapdos did not hold with gender. That was a weird thing other beings did.

Tiny Human pat its beak. “Calm down, she doesn’t know.” He turned to Red Human. “Zapdos doesn’t hold with gender. It pecked at the last idiots who insisted on it. That’s why I use it/its with it.”

Blue Human nodded. “Is this a Legendary thing, you think?”

Tiny Human shrugged. “I don’t know, I’ve only ever met Zapdos. Anyway, when I first met Zapdos, I was five and had never seen a Fearow before. All I knew was that Fearow had spiky feathers, a long beak, and angry eyes. Zapdos matched the description when I first met it, so I assumed.”

“You’re telling me that you, the son of a pokémon breeder, had never seen a Fearow before?” Blue Human asked.

“Dad didn’t bring his work home with him! And he specialized in Eevees and Electric-types!” Tiny Human pouted. Somehow, with all the years that had gone by, Tiny Human still looked young and adorable when he pouted. It wasn’t fair! Tiny Human could trick anyone with that pout!

“Okay, okay, so you were kind of sheltered as a kid, for all that you had the energy of an overcharged Pichu. How did you manage to get Zapdos to not fry you?” Red Human asked, hands on her knees and leaning closer.

Zapdos was pretty sure she just wanted to know why Tiny Human wasn’t dead. And that she thought Tiny Human would give her an idea of how to approach Moltres once she found it.

It snickered at the thought. What worked for one of them wasn’t guaranteed to work for all of them.

“Well, honestly, I don’t know? I just knew that Zapdos wasn’t gonna hurt me. I was just looking for a Pokémon to be my friend, see, but by the time I’d seen Zapdos, it was dark and I was late for dinner and I was just, really miserable?” Tiny Human shrugged, his eyes glossing over as he remembered the incident.

Zapdos took the time to brush Tiny Human’s hair, as it had when they had first met.

“Thanks buddy.” Tiny Human told it with a smile. “Then Zapdos gave me a lift home, and when it didn’t leave immediately I figured maybe it liked me? And I had an empty Great Ball in my pocket.”

“So what, you just threw it at Zapdos?” Red Human asked.

Zapdos let out an angry squawk. The audacity…!

Tiny Human wasn’t much better. “Arceus, no! What kind of person would that make me! I was five and young, not stupid!”

Blue Human held up their hands in consideration. “Alright, so you didn’t do that. How did you catch Zapdos, then?”

“I asked,” Tiny Human said simply.

“…Are you serious?” Red Human demanded. “That worked?”

“Yes…” Tiny Human said slowly, as if he couldn’t imagine otherwise.

The room was left in silence for a moment.

“Okay, so you have a Zapdos. Professor Willow apparently knows. Has he met Zapdos, though?” Blue Human asked.

“Oh yeah! They met when I was… seven? Something like that. We got it measured that day, and I met Mr. Iggles. Actually, now that I think about it, I haven’t officially introduced you guys to Zapdos!” Tiny Human crawled out from underneath Zapdos’ wing, dusting off his pants.

Tiny Human beamed at Zapdos. “Zapdos, this is Blanche.” He pointed towards Blue Human. “And this is Candela.” Tiny Human gestured towards Red Human. “Blanche, Candela, this is Zapdos. No, I don’t know why it let me think it was a Fearow, or why it answered to Fearow, but he’s my best friend, my first and oldest Pokémon.”

Zapdos cawed and rustled its feathers a bit.

“Nice to meet you!” Red Human said.

Blue Human simply nodded.

Zapdos nodded back. It liked the two humans Tiny Human had befriended. They weren’t as bad as the Small Humans (9) from Tiny Human’s childhood, and weren’t fussing over it or Tiny Human. As far as first impressions went, they were doing better than the Stupid Humans (10). If they continued to impress it, maybe it would hint at where Articuno and Moltres rested…

“Oh, hey! I promised you Poképuffs, didn’t I?”

Ooh! Poképuffs!

Zapdos abandoned its train of thought to follow Tiny Human as he searched the tiny cooking area in his nesting chamber for the desserts Zapdos was promised.

Food first. Humans later. And if they did not respect it, then Zapdos reserved the right to label them Stupid Humans, and deal with them accordingly, Tiny Human’s friends or not.

Zapdos to Human terminology:

(1) Team Rocket

(2) Candela

(3) Blanche

(4) Professor Willow’s lab

(5) Nurse Joy

(6) bedroom

(7) Spark’s personal Pokémon

(8) bed; Spark’s is actually a large round bed sunk into the floor and lined with pillows, like an actual nest

(9) children, equivalent to 4-9 humans years old

(10) trainers who attempted to catch Zapdos

An abrupt end because Zapdos is not the most attentive, and I am bad at endings. There also a mention of Spark’s other Pokémon besides Zapdos and Mr. Iggles. This is deliberate. No, I’m not mentioning what Pokémon they are, but I figure you can guess. There will one day be an installment about how Spark got his team of Pokémon, but this is not that day.

Comments/feedback, as always, is highly appreciated, though not mandatory. And as always, I am accepting suggestions for series installments, though I may not actually write it.

[tori10rambles]

Moltres rebutted, "Honestly Zapdos, you hate the humans who normally come to your nest. What's so different about this one?" In a fit of temper, Zapdos shouted, "This one asked!" It echoed in the chamber, and Zapdos knew it had blown both of the others' minds. Or: Zapdos has a Human. Articuno and Moltres are surprised and jealous 

[tori10rambles]

@zyxyz-xyzzy mentioned you in a post: @ fanfiction authors (pt 2)

…this again here.)@miyaio @ mizukitsune10 @mllelaurel @moczothe1st @nagia-pronounced-neijia @ncfan-1…

Ahhh!!! Thank you for reccing my fics!

[tori10rambles]

Headcanons/World Building for The Adventures of Zapdos and Its Tiny Human (Part 2)

Contents:

World Building/Universe Headcanons (UPDATED)

Future Oneshots/Ideas (UPDATED)

Zapdos Character Notes (UPDATED)

Spark headcanons/Characterization Notes

Rumors About the Zapdos Trainer

Zapdos to Human terminology

As always, I am accepting prompts for this universe, despite the list of things I already have on my plate. Depending on how much motivation stirkes/Zapdos-Muse likes the prompts, it could be written.

World Building/Universe Headcanons

these are all still valid

Pokémon may not say their own names, but they do converse with each other.

Shiny Pokémon are rare, but indeed a thing, though maybe not as rare as they are in the games.

Zapdos-Muse has yet to tell me how Spark figured it (the reveal) out. Just that Willow was involved. As were tears. It refuses to say much more. So aggravating.

Future Oneshots/Ideas

The jig is up (aka Spark finds out exactly what his first pokemon is, featuring Professor Willow)

Zapdos can no longer stay in denial (aka Zapdos admits it loves Tiny Human)

Zapdos brags about its Tiny Human to the other Legendary Birds

Zapdos finds out Tiny Human is being bullied. it does not need to be seen to get its revenge.

Zapdos takes a nap, and loses Tiny Human!

Spark tries to make Zapdos a nest (aka Zapdos learning how to live in a human house)

the Cycling Road Incident

Zapdos and Tiny Human's First Day at the Labs (aka Spark meets Blanche and Candela, and tries to make his part of the lab a home)

Zapdos and Its New Followers (aka the birth/induction of Team Instinct)

Spark and Fearow stumble on kids bullying a pokemon

Zapdos helps out for Show and Tell

Zapdos and the Glasses-Egg Human (or Spark interns with Professor Elm)

Zapdos and Tiny Human "troll people" (aka Teen!Spark and his "Fearow" battle a bully of a trainer.)

Zapdos learns how to dance (aka Zapdos joins the rest of Spark's team in learning how to dab)

For all that Tiny Human is older and a perfectly capable adult, there are still days where nestlings are more mature (aka Zapdos plays Mama Bird to an overworked, ill Spark) 

Zapdos Characterization (UPDATED)

these are all still valid

Zapdos is at least a century old, but getting it to admit how old it is is an exercise in futility. It ain't talking.

Zapdos wants to make this prank last. It is not above bribery, threats, and outright attacks to do so.

Zapdos knows tough love because its sire and/or dam were the tough love type. Had to be to leave Zapdos when it was just old enough to defend itself. I mentioned somewhere earlier that Zapdos did not have long with its own parents. It might have been a comment thread on ao3. it might have been in a story. I don't remember anymore. Either way, Zapdos wouldn't be talking about its parents in universe anyway, so all you get are a few offhand comments in story.

This is more relevant to future installments, when Spark is older and has a full team and working as Willow’s assistant.

Zapdos gets annoyed by some of Spark's Pokémon, because their personalities sometimes clash.

It also is kind of jealous because they get to leave their Pokéballs   and fight and chill with Spark more often.

Zapdos only gets released in emergencies, or when there's literally no one else in the lab/about to disturb Spark. And even then, there's a good chance that Spark will return Zapdos unexpectedly because someone's approaching.

Zapdos is actually pretty chill with Spark's Pokémon that take up most of his attention, because (as mentioned in Red, Blue, Tiny, R) most of Spark's Pokémon are either hatched by Egg Dad himself, or were formerly abandoned/injured. Zapdos does not begrudge them the attention.

What Zapdos doesn't like are the wild Pokémon that take up all of Spark’s attention, and have no intentions of staying. Those piss it off because it doesn't like the thought of Spark being taken advantage of.

Zapdos believes it can always stand to be more terrifying. Do you know how many Electric-Type Legendaries there are? And Flying-Type Legendaries? It needs to up its game man, to become the most powerful of them.

Spark headcanons/Characterization notes

Smol!Spark:

Spark had thought about nicknaming Zapdos. Mr. Big Bird was an option. As was Mr. Chicken. Thankfully, Spark was just relieved that "Fearow" brought him home and agreed to be his friend. Also, he thought you could only nickname Pokémon you hatched yourself. By the time he realized he could nickname Pokémon he hadn't hatched, he was just too used to Fearow to change it.

Spark is very instinctual (obviously), and trusts his gut more instinct more than his education.

Adult!Spark (most of these won’t actually be addressed in story for a long time, if at all)

Spark spent some time doing research on Pokémon breeding with Professor Elm in Johto.

Despite being a jokester, Spark is very protective of those he cares about.

Spark owns a lot of electric proof clothing, but tends to forget he needs to wear them when working with his electric types.

His pokemon all have either punny nicknames, are named after memes, or (in the case of his electric types) are named after electricity/magnetism/energy terms

Spark is a mechanical genius. There is a reason why he’s in charge of incubator maintenance, and it’s not just because the things are expensive.

Spark is kind of like a storm; he'll mull over what's making him upset, and strike when you least expect it with a smile on his face. But afterwards, all is forgiven and he won't hold it against you.

Spark is the most junior of the research assistants, but not the youngest.

Spark’s team takes care of a lot of Pokémon that are distrustful of humans or are too rowdy to keep in the other labs.

Spark saves some of his research money for fun things like pizza parties or movie nights, but it’s like, less than a percent of his yearly budget, and most of the Team brings something to every party so that food costs go down.

Rumors about the Zapdos Trainer

This may actually become part of a fic, but I don’t know yet.

That Zapdos’ Trainer just wanted the firepower of a Legendary and is mistreating him. (so false)

That Zapdos’ Trainer has a team of Legendaries. (also incredibly false)

That Zapdos has been seen hanging around a little kid who is assumed to be the trainer’s son (so wrong it’s hilarious)

That Zapdos has been seen in the Viridian Forest, near the Cycling Road, and in Johto? (All true at varying points in time)

That Zapdos’ trainer treats Zapdos like any other Pokémon (true)

That no one will tell if they’ve seen the Zapdos trainer or not (very true for varying reasons)

Zapdos to Human terminology

Some of these haven’t been used yet, but have the list anyway.

Tiny Human - Spark

sire and dam - male and female parent, respectively

Stupid Humans  - trainers who attempted to catch Zapdos

hatchling  - the equivalent to human baby/toddler (newborn humans  to 3 year olds)

nestling/Small Human  - the equivalent to a human child (4 to 9 years old)

fledgling  - the equivalent to a human preteen (10 to 13 years old)

juvenile -  the equivalent to a human teenager (14 to 17 years old)

Big Humans - (older) Pokémon Trainers/adults

White Human  - Professor Willow

Red Human  - Candela

Blue Human  - Blanche

R Humans  - Team Rocket Grunts

Chansey Human  - Nurse Joy

Glasses-Egg Human  - Professor Elm

roost  - bed

roosting chamber  - bedroom

nest - home

Tiny Human’s brood  - the Pokémon spark takes care of, as well as his personal party

crèche  - the group of Pokémon Team Instinct takes care of, but don't own

clutch (of eggs)  - a group of eggs (usually ones Team Instinct/Spark is caring for)

colony  - Instinct Gyms/labs

preening  - grooming/making (someone) presentable

[tori10rambles]

A Trip to the Viridian Forest

Also on ao3 (the better, more updated version imo. Also with more explanations and more comprehensive author notes)

As requested by an anon, here is "Fearow" and Spark (and Mr. Iggles, considering the timeline) meeting Fearow. This one takes place a bit after "How Is He An Ace Trainer?"

Summary (from ao3):

So... either you're not a Fearow—"

Zapdos began to get worried. Of all the times for Tiny Human to show his intelligence, it had to be now!?

"—or you are a Fearow, but a special one!" Tiny Human finished triumphantly.

Or, "Fearow" and Spark meet Fearow.

Zapdos had done a very good job of intimidating the humans into not ruining its fun, if it did say so itself. It had been weeks since the last time Zapdos had to make its displeasure known, and Tiny Human was still none the wiser to its true identity!

Although... Zapdos did worry about the gullibility of human nestlings (1) if Tiny Human was indicative of the rest of its species. It was pretty sure it had not been as gullible as a nestling.

"Come on Fearow!" Tiny Human cried as he tugged gently at one of Zapdos' wings, though he was careful enough not to pluck a feather. "I wanna go look at the Pokémon in the forest!"

Zapdos grumbled a bit; it had been enjoying its nap! Just because Tiny Human was only 7 years old did not mean it had as much energy!

Zapdos carefully disregarded the knowledge that it was only a juvenile (2) as far as its own life cycle went, and was therefore being hypocritical. It slept that much because it enjoyed sleep, rather than needed it. Besides, it was a Legendary Pokémon of Electricity. It always had more energy than it knew what to do with. Especially since it was now living with Tiny Human, who always ran out of steam long before Zapdos did.

"I promise to get you some Poffins," Tiny Human wheedled.

Zapdos did not shoot up at the bribe. Of course not. It had more pride than that. It was just humoring Tiny Human.

Those Poffins better have sprinkles and berries, or Zapdos was not going to be a happy Legendary. Even if it was disguising itself as a Fearow.

Zapdos ignored the sniggering Mr. Iggles. It kind of missed the days when Mr. Iggles had been frightened of it. Not that those had lasted very long. It was hard to be terrified of the Legendary Pokémon who allowed itself to be called Fearow by a Small Human

With a cheer, Tiny Human carefully sent Zapdos back into its pokéball, following Spark's Rules for Owning Fearow, as dictated by Tiny Human's Sire (3).

Mr. Iggles bounded up to Tiny Human and settled itself in his arms. Zapdos would be annoyed with how much time the Igglybuff got to spend outside of its pokéball, except that the Balloon Pokémon was never taken seriously, and often had its cheeks pinched.

"Mom! We're gonna go explore the forest!" Tiny Human yelled as he laced his sneakers. Well, knotted them, more like. Tiny Human had ruined many a pair of shoelaces because he didn't tie them properly, and ended up making a horrific knot that had to be sliced through. His sire and dam(4) were contemplating buying the nestling "velcro shoes."

Zapdos did not understand shoes. They were weird. But, it supposed that they were the only things protecting human feet when they walked, because it had seen many humans wince in pain when they stepped on something sharp.

Zapdos figured anything that kept Tiny Human from tripping would be perfect. Because Arceus knew he got into trouble with or without tripping over his own feet. Tiny Human tripped over the things more often than not.

"Be back by sunset, and do not go too deep into the forest!" his dam called back. "We do not need a repeat of the time you got lost!"

That had been a disaster. Zapdos knew that it, Tiny Human, and Mr. Iggles would never admit to Tiny Human's dam that the only reason why Tiny Human had gotten lost was because Zapdos had taken a nap and lost sight of him after Tiny Human had run away from a large bug Pokémon. Tiny Human would never be allowed out of the house, and it was a blow to Zapdos' pride that Tiny Human, of all humans, had managed to escape its notice, even if it were while the Legendary had been sleeping.

"Yes mom!" Tiny Human called back as he raced out of the doors.

Once Tiny Human had reached the forest, he scuttled to his "private" place: a small clearing far from prying eyes. Peering around to ensure no one else was around, Tiny Human released Zapdos.

Zapdos ruffled its feathers and peered at Tiny Human in question.

Tiny Human looked between Mr. Iggles and Zapdos as he explained, "I was thinking about maybe making another friend. Also, I heard there was a Dratini in the forest!"

Zapdos knew that was a dead lie. Kanto had long had its remaining Dratini habitat dwindled down to that large plot of land in Southern Kanto that the humans were trying to keep "natural."

Still, it wouldn't do to ruin Tiny Human's fun. It would have to return to its pokéball if that were the case!

Besides, Tiny Human might cry, and that would be annoying. Especially the weird twisting feeling in its guts that popped up when Tiny Human bawled.

"If they make you cry, I'll make them sorry!" Mr Iggles chirped as he puffed up, trying to make himself look bigger and more intimidating. He just succeeded in making himself look more adorable to humans.

"You're so cute!" Tiny Human cooed.

Mr. Iggles face faulted.

Zapdos sniggered. "I told you. You're too cute for humans to take seriously. Just go with it and make them pay for thinking so."

Mr. Iggles ignored it, as he usually did when Zapdos had a completely correct point and was being insufferable about it.

Hey, Zapdos was powerful and intimidating, not gracious.

Once Mr. Iggles had picked itself up from the ground, Spark pointed towards the forest proper.

"Onward!" he called with glee, and raced off into the bushes.

Hurriedly, Mr. Iggles and Zapdos followed.

They did not want to lose Tiny Human! Who knew what the boy would get into!

Honestly, Zapdos couldn't see the appeal in befriending any of the Pokémon in the forest.

Caterpie and Metapod were delicious, but not really friend material.

Pikachu were interesting, but very few of them ever approached Tiny Human, to his dismay. He loved Electric types.

Zapdos laughed at the irony of Tiny Human owning a Legendary Pokémon of Electricity, and bemoaning his lack of Electric-type friends.

Honestly, if they couldn't handle Tiny Human and his pokémon (Zapdos not included), they wouldn't be able to handle being a caught Pokémon at all.

Pidgey were annoying, and once you saw one, you'd seen them all. The same went for Pidgeotto. It was like every trainer who left the forest had one of the darn things!

And if it wasn't the Pidgey, it was the Spearow, which pissed off Zapdos because they were stupid enough to attack it.

It! Legendary Bird Pokémon of Electricity! Attacked by Spearow! And not particularly powerful ones either!

Like the ones in front of it now, currently trying to attack Tiny Human because he stumbled upon their nest.

Because of course Tiny Human would find the largest Spearow flock in the forest. And of course he would accidentally trip over his shoe laces, sending a pebble flying into the nearest Spearow.

Zapdos was going to destroy those damn shoes.

Tiny Human had taken one look at the angry flock and whisper-asked, "Can you do something? You were a Spearow once, weren't you?"

Well, no. Because it was—you know—a Zapdos?

Zapdos glared at the offending Pokémon in warning instead. These annoyances weren't worth talking to.

The Spearow chirped, "Let's get them!"

One lone voice said, "Isn't that Zapdos?"

"So? Let's get them anyway!" came the reply from another member of the flock.

"Yeah!"

Tiny Human didn't need to understand Pokémon to know the Spearow weren't backing down. "Let's get out of here!"

Tiny Human ran, Mr. Iggles clutched in his arms. Zapdos followed, half cursing the fact that it was running from Arceus-damned Spearow because of a prank.

The reveal had better be worth it, or Zapdos was going to fry every single being involved in this travesty.

Luckily for Tiny Human, he ran faster than the Spearow could fly, and was soon far from the angry flock.

Unluckily for Tiny Human, the Spearow had apparently planned for this.

"They're getting away!"

"We should call Boss!"

"Boss! Boss!"

Zapdos sorted. No "Boss" was going to beat it!

"Who upset my nestlings!?"

Zapdos inwardly groaned.

"Boss" was a Fearow.

Like, an actual Fearow.

As in, the one Pokémon who could ruin the entire prank!

It was too soon for the reveal damn it! It had only been two years! Zapdos was pretty damn sure it could stand to last another 3 at least before the joke got old!

And the damn thing was flying in from the direction Tiny Human was headed towards! Zapdos didn't really have time to keep the Fearow away.

Well, it did, but then it would be leaving Tiny Human alone with Mr. Iggles and the flock of angry Spearow, who would probably catch up once Tiny Human tripped again. Or something.

(There was no way Zapdos' Tiny Human was going to be attacked by some Spearow, okay? It would reflect badly on Zapdos.)

So now all Zapdos had to do was hope Tiny Human was not bright enough to connect the dots.

...There was no way it would be that lucky.

...Apparently, Zapdos stood corrected.

The Fearow had taken one look at Zapdos, and went, "What the name of Arceus are you idiots thinking! That's Zapdos! Getting one kid is not worth the hassle of getting friend by an Arceus-damned Legendary of Electricity!"

Huh, Zapdos actually kind of liked this Fearow. It had some sense.

(Actually, the Fearow took one look at the pissed off Legendary, one look at the kid, and decided that indulging in his nestlings' anger would have to wait for Zapdos to leave first.)

Tiny Human took a look at the actual Fearow and hummed to himself.

"Hey Fearow, it looks kind of like you!"

The wild Flying-type Pokémon all looked at the human in their midst incredulously.

Did... did that child just call Zapdos, Legendary Bird of Electricity, Fearow!?

Given the glare they were getting from the Legendary, the answer was yes.

Zapdos crooned and nodded at Tiny Human.

Tiny Human hummed again. "Okay... but Fearow don't look like any other Pokémon. So... either you're not a Fearow—"

Zapdos began to get worried. Of all the times for Tiny Human to show his intelligence, it had to be now!?

"—or you are a Fearow, but a special one!" Tiny Human finished triumphantly.

Fearow looked around in disbelief. "Is... is this human alright?"

How is he still alive? was the unvoiced question.

Mr. Iggles huffed. "Of course Spark is fine! It's not his fault Zapdos thinks it's funny to mess with him!"

Fearow looked at the Legendary, who was snickering to itself with a spark of relief in its eyes as it stared at the small human.

Then Zapdos took one look at Fearow and stared at him.

Fearow felt cold as Zapdos' Pressure came down on him. The rest of his nestlings weren't much better.

"I got it! I got it!" Fearow cried. "I won't screw this up!"

Zapdos nodded to itself in satisfaction and turned back to the human, its Pressure lessening.

Fearow and his nestlings breathed a sigh of relief.

Fearow turned to his nestlings. "From now on, you don't touch this human."

The Spearow nodded.

Zapdos nudged Tiny Human to get his attention. Once Tiny Human turned his head towards the yellow and black bird, Zapdos lifted its beak to point at the sun, which was beginning to touch the top of the trees.

The entire exploration and chase had taken three hours, and it was now almost dinnertime.

"Oh no! We need to get home!" Tiny Human yelped.

Zapdos nodded and Tiny Human rapidly returned Zapdos to its ball and gathered Mr. Iggles in his arms.

Before he ran off, he turned to the flabbergasted Fearow and his nestlings. "Thank you for not attacking us," he said with a bow.

The Fearow could only nod.

Tiny Human beamed and chirped, "Bye bye!" Immediately after, Tiny Human ran out of the clearing and towards his nest (5).

"Boss? Did we just see Zapdos get called 'Fearow' and sent into a pokéball owned by a tiny human?" One Spearow asked.

Fearow snorted, "I don't know about you guys, but that? Never happened."

"Yeah!" "You got it Boss!" "What are you talking about?" the rest of the nestlings replied.

Fearow took to his wings and said, "Come on you guys. The human's right, it's time for food and rest. And hopefully, we'll all wake up tomorrow and it was just a dream."

"Hey dad?" Tiny Human asked over the dinner table.

"What's up, Spark?" his sire asked.

"Is there any way that two Pokémon can look kind of the same, but be colored differently?" Tiny Human asked.

"Yes, the Pokémon that doesn't look like a typically member of its species is called a Shiny Pokémon. Why?"

Tiny Human turned to Zapdos, who was munching on some delicious Poffins made with sprinkles and Oran Berries.

"Are you a shiny Fearow then?"

Zapdos sighed in relief. Oh, thank Arceus! A way out of admitting the truth! The prank could go on!

Tiny Human's sire and dam looked stricken.

"Spark, why are you asking 'Fearow' that?" his dam asked.

"Because I saw another Fearow today, but it wasn't black and yellow like Fearow is! So either Fearow isn't a Fearow, or Fearow's special! But Fearow has the spiky feathers and everything, so it has to be a Fearow. So Fearow must be special. And Dad said special Pokémon are called Shiny, so Fearow must be a Shiny Fearow, yeah?" Tiny Human replied.

"...I see." his sire replied.

Zapdos poked Tiny Human lightly on the shoulder to catch his attention. Once it was sure Tiny Human was actually paying attention to it, it nodded.

Tiny Human nodded, "So you're a Shiny Fearow! No wonder you're so cool!"

Mr. Iggles, eating Pokémon food out of its own dish next to Zapdos, sighed. "I cannot believe that Spark believes you."

Zapdos sniggered, "I'm just that believable."

Zapdos to Human translations:

nestling - equivalent to a human child (4 to 9 years)

juvenile - equivalent to a human teenager (13 to 19 years)

sire - male parent

dam - female parent

nest - home

So... maybe not my best work? I'm sorry, work is soul draining, and I'm currently fighting my completionist streak in Mystic Messenger and Pokémon Moon is calling my name. Also, I don't have a beta.

Also, you may have noticed that I had the Pokémon "speak" in this one. It'll probably become more common as Tiny Human and Zapdos encounter more Pokémon and actually do more than just battle. Although, Zapdos isn't much of a talker. Unless it's bragging. It's totally doing that "I'm too cool to speak to you unless it's to rub my accomplishments in your face" thing that teenagers go through.

Comments/feedback, as always, is highly appreciated, though not mandatory.

[tori10rambles]

Of Mr. Iggles and the Big White Human

also found on ao3 here 

As always, translations for unfamiliar terms Zapdos uses are at the bottom. Any dialogue you recognize, and Mr. Iggles, belong to ToukoTai.

Oh, and there's fanart(!!!!) of "How Is He an Ace Trainer?" Go check it out!

Summary (from ao3):

Wait... It finally hit Zapdos.

Tiny Human was holding a hatching egg! That hatchling better be safe after all this, or Zapdos was going to fry White Human, prank be damned! Tiny Human, on the other hand, would just be ignored for the next several weeks. No, it wasn't going easy on Tiny Human. White Human just should have known better than to hand Tiny Human an egg that close to hatching.

Or: Zapdos' POV of Chapter 3 of ToukoTai's The Electric Slide

Zapdos grumpily eyed the room Tiny Human was waiting in for the tenth time in as many minutes. Tiny Human was fidgeting like an uncomfortablenestling again. It did not want to be in this shiny building, but the weird Big White Human had asked Tiny Human to come in, and Tiny Human had.

Zapdos figured it was kind of its fault that they were in the shiny building in the first place. Not that it would ever admit that it was at fault. It was a Legendary Pokémon after all.

A few days back...

Zapdos had flown a bit too high, and lost sight of Tiny Human. This was not an uncommon occurrence, but it was annoying. At the very least, they were near the nest Tiny Human lived in; it could be assured that Tiny Human knew how to get back.

After a few minutes of mindlessly soaring above the clouds, Zapdos heard Tiny Human calling.

"Fearow!"

Following the voice, Zapdos found Tiny Human with a somewhat bigger human—recently mature, if Zapdos had to guess—with white hair and dressed in white, black, and green.

He looked rather surprised and confused. "That's not a Fearow, kid."

Zapdos was impressed that none of his confusion could be heard in the Big White Human's voice. Most other humans needed at least one glare and the shifting of electrified wings to sound that calm.

"Of course he’s a Fearow," Tiny Human said, hands on his hips. "He’s got the spikey feathers and the beak and everything!"

The Big White Human immediately sounded more sure of himself when he replied, "Actually, Fearow feathers are more blocky in construction. It allows for better stamina when airborne."

"Yeah, I know Fearow can fly. He does it all the time." Tiny Human said with a blink.

The Big White Human blinked back. "Did you not just hear a word I just said?"

Zapdos figured Tiny Human understood the first part of the Big White Human's words, but not the latter.  Tiny Human wasn't good with big words.

"Look kid," Big White Human began.

"It's Spark," Tiny Human asserted.

Zapdos narrowed its eyes at the Big White Human. He had better learn Tiny Human's name. Even Zapdos knew Tiny Human's name. It just didn't want to use it. It probably never would. Tiny Human would always be Tiny Human.

The Big White Human adjusted accordingly. "Right, Spark. Would you like to see some really, uh, cool Pokémon?"

"Would I?!" Tiny Human's eyes lit up, and Zapdos just knew where Tiny Human's head went.

"I have a research facility with a lot of rare — "

Zapdos winked at the Big White Human in approval. He was playing along with Zapdos' prank, and he barely needed to be threatened!

If only all Big Humans were that smart. Then Zapdos wouldn't have to keep threatening Big Humans when Tiny Human wasn't looking.  Zapdos couldn't kid itself. It enjoyed it when Big Humans needed to be threatened.

The Big Human spluttered a bit, but recovered quickly. “Pokémon for you to see. All you’d have to do is bring uh, Fearow with you. Since he’s such a unique Fearow, I want to do a really quick harmless exam."

"Like going to the doctor’s?" Tiny Human asked, eyes narrowing in suspicion.

Zapdos snickered to itself. Tiny Human hated the Chansey Humans that looked him over every year. They smelled bad and weren’t very nice, apparently. Tiny Human had apparently never heard of tough love.

"Sort of? I just want to take some measurements. I won’t hurt him," the Big Human swore.

Zapdos grimaced. The Human and other Pokémon‘s tendency to gender themselves was weird. Zapdos didn’t do with that kind of silliness.

Tiny Human scrunched his nose up, then turned to look at Zapdos. "Well? What do you think?"

One the one claw, Tiny Human really wanted to go see these "cool Pokémon." As if there was something cooler than itself at this shiny building.

On the other, the Big White Human was a stranger who Zapdos didn't trust. Zapdos had never had anyone try to get closer to itself besides Tiny Human. And if the Big White Human was like the other Big Humans who had intruded on its nest, Zapdos was not inclined to agree.

Worse comes to worse, Zapdos could always fry the place and the Big White Human. It wasn't like the Big White Human would have anything that could beat it.

Zapdos did not remember the excited look in Tiny Human's eyes. It had nothing to do with its final decision. Absolutely nothing.

Zapdos shuffled its feathers, creating small sparks of static electricity, and bobbed it head slightly, letting its beak brush against Tiny Human's cheek.

The boy giggled. “Okay mister, we’re in.”

“That’s...that’s it?” The Big White Human looked confused.

Zapdos didn't worry about that. Most people looked confused when Tiny Human and Zapdos made a decision together.

Tiny Human nodded his head while the Big White Human rubbed his forehead.

Zapdos figured the Big White Human was just too confused to question what was going on. It wasn't like Tiny Human and Zapdos were giving him room to ask questions. If Zapdos had its way, there wouldn't be any questions. Especially none of the revealing kind.

“Here,” the Big White Human handed Tiny Human a card. “Have your parents call me to set up a time.”

Tiny Human squinted at the card, mouth moving as he read the words. He looked up at the older human in question. “So, you’re a Pokémon Professor?” Tiny Human sounded skeptical.

The Big White Human looked like he didn’t appreciate the tone in Tiny Human's voice, but he nodded. “Assistant Professor, really.”

“Well Mister Ass-is-tant Pro-fes-or, you should really know a Fearow when you see one. You’ll never make professor at this rate.” Tiny Human said matter-of-factly.

Zapdos snickered as the Big White Human looked like he wanted to smack his head against a nearby tree.

Tiny Human did that to people.

Back to the present...

“Ah, kid, there you are.” the Big White poked his head out of the lab entrance.

“It’s Spark.” Tiny Human corrected, jumping off the waiting room chair and scrambling over to the lab door.

“Yeah, sure.” The Big White Human held the door open, allowing the boy access to the hallway beyond. “You like Pidgey?” He asked semi-hopefully.

Spark snorted. “I see a million Pidgey every day. You gotta do better than that.”

Zapdos agreed. Pidgey were annoying, always loud and present no matter where Tiny Human and Zapdos went.

The Big White Human cast a half annoyed half resigned glance at another door they were walking by. The sound of angry squawking and a pain filled human shriek came from the room beyond.

Zapdos bet that was where all their Pidgey were. You wouldn't be able to bribe Zapdos to go into that room unless it was allowed to use its electricity to shut the rowdier ones up.

Don't even get Zapdos started on actual Fearow and Spearow. Those made Zapdos angry rather than annoyed. It was their fault for trying to attack it.

“Trust me, you haven’t seen a million Pidgey until you’ve worked here,” the Big White Human mumbled under his breath, they reached the end of the corridor and turned down another one, this one much shorter. “We’re going to take your...Fearow’s measurements first. And then I’ll give you a grand tour of the labs.”

They reached the correct room. Zapdos immediately noticed that it was full of other Big Humans—those these humans looked marginally more intelligent than the ones who hunted Zapdos down to its previous nest—Zapdos figured there was a high chance of someone blurting its real identity.

Zapdos did not want that to happen. It'd only been with Tiny Human for a few months. Zapdos figured that it could keep up the ruse for years, and Zapdos was intent on making that a reality.

Tiny Human released an amused Zapdos—and true to its belief—one of the Big Humans gasped and declared, “That’s Zap—”

The Big White Human slapped a hand over the Stupid Big Human, who was now on the receiving end of one of Zapdos' Death Glares as it loomed menacingly over its curious, but clueless Tiny Human.

Zapdos decided at that moment that White Human was actually pretty okay.

Outside of that incident, Zapdos refrained from making a scene as White Human and the other Big Humans took tapes and measured it. Zapdos didn't fidget, nor try to attack the various Big Humans, even when they poked and prodded at it.

Tiny Human looked bored, and Zapdos kind of was too, so the sooner this was done, the sooner fun could be had.

The only bright side was that the Big Humans kept trying to say something, only for White Human to shut them up. Though even he still looked vaguely confused.

Ah, confusion and chaos. Its work was done here.

In a strange moment of whimsy, Zapdos plucked a molting feather from its back to give the Big Humans. Maybe that would stop them from bugging Tiny Human? Only Zapdos got to do that with any sort of regularity!

Once the transfer was done, Tiny Human returned it to its Great Ball at the behest of White Human.

“Sorry, I’m worried he might upset the other Pokémon.” White Human explained.

Tiny Human looked at White Human as if the older human was stupid. “He’s a Fearow.” Tiny Human emphasized slowly.

Zapdos couldn't help but laugh in its Great Ball. It was always hilarious to see Tiny Human act as if everyone elsewas stupid for treating Zapdos like... well... Zapdos, and not the Fearow Tiny Human thought it was.

“He’s a big Fearow, Spark.” White Human tried. “And we’re going to be seeing some Pokémon that are babies.”

“Oooooohhhhh.” Tiny Human's look turned into one of understanding. Apparently, Tiny Human's sire was a "Pokémon breeder," and had apparently told Tiny Human about the behavior of baby Pokémon over dinner.

Zapdos actually agreed with White Human there. Baby Pokémon didn't deserve to be scared so young.

It did not surprise Zapdos that Tiny Human was not impressed with many of the Pokémon.

The herd of Tauros received a satisfactory hum.

Zapdos wondered if they would be an amusing fight or not.

The room of Caterpie and Metapod a thorough glance and appreciative "Cool".

Zapdos was reminded that it had not eaten at all since breakfast that day.

The tank of Staryu and the single Starmie received the same excited but otherwise unengaged response.

Zapdos idly wished it could unleash at least some of its electricity. Not even to attack the Water Pokémon in the tank. It just wanted to release some pent up energy. If some Pokémon ended up fried, well, it wasn't its fault...

It wasn’t until the end of the tour—when White Human took Tiny Human by the nursery—that the younger human really showed any enthusiasm.

“Wooooooow,” Tiny Human breathed, hands and face pressed up against the glass window. “What are thoooooose?”

For some reason, Zapdos snickered to itself, though it did not know why.

White Human, meanwhile, rocked back on his heels, a bemused expression on his face. “Those are Pokémon eggs.”

Tiny Human pressed his face harder against the glass. “Pokémon eggs? They’re going to hatch into Pokémon?”

Zapdos knew at once that Tiny Human was in love with that room. He loved listening to stories about his sire's job as a breeder, and the sight of that many eggs was rather interesting.

White Human nodded—remembered the boy couldn’t see him with his face mashed against the observation window—and replied verbally. “That’s right, there are species of baby Pokémon we’re trying to study, so we have to hatch them first.”

Spark’s head whipped around so fast Zapdos could swear it almost heard the boy’s neck crack. “I need to go in there.”

With an amused snort, White Human ushered him into the room.

Zapdos could hear the hum of electricity emanating from the room. It was rather pleasant.

“Sometimes we play the sounds of the full grown Pokémon calls,” White Human said, following along behind Tiny Human as the child walked carefully down the rows of incubators.

Zapdos was kind of surprised that Tiny Human was walking so quietly and calmly. Tiny Human usually acted as if he were three seconds from bouncing on the walls.

Tiny Human's face was stuck in a wide grin as he peered into the different machines containing the eggs and squinted at the ID cards showed that he was just as excited inside the room as outside it. His smile was contagious, and both White Human and Zapdos found themselves smiling, or Zapdos' closest equivalent, at Tiny Human.

“This one,” Tiny Human pointed up at a seemingly random egg. “Can I hold it?”

White Human handed the boy a pair of thick soft gloves. “Sit over there.” He nudged the child over to a set of big comfortably padded chairs.

While Tiny Human climbed up onto the chair, White Human carefully lifted the egg from its padded machine and handed it, slowly and gently into Tiny Human’s lap.

“Wooooow,” Tiny Human breathed again. The egg was about the same size as a large stuffed animal Zapdos knew sat on Tiny Human's bed, and it took both of his arms to hold it in his lap. “This. is. Awesome!” He quietly squealed, rubbing his cheek against the smooth plain of the egg’s shell. “It’s so warm!”

Zapdos idly wondered what was in the egg. Hopefully, it wouldn't be traumatized by Tiny Human's squeals They got kind of annoying after a while if he didn't stop.

“Well it has to be, if we want it to hatch.” White Human said, crouched in front of the chair.

“What’s it gonna be?” Tiny Human asked, wide eyes peering over the top of the egg down at White Human. “When it hatches? Is it a Charmander? A Squirtle? Oh! A Bulbasuar!”

“Nah, these are Igglybuff eggs,” White Human told Tiny Human.

“Igglybuff?”

“The baby Pokémon of the Wigglytuff line.”

Zapdos knew for a fact that Tiny Human was still kind of lost. Tiny Human had yet to see a Jigglypuff, let alone a Wigglytuff.

“The pink ones that sing.” White Human amended.

Zapdos thought they were kind of silly. Amusing for sure, but much too prone to abusing Sing.

“Ooooooohhhhhh,” Tiny Human nodded in understanding. “They look really squishy.”

“The Wigglytuff line is known for having a rubbery body.” White Human agreed.

Despite this rubbery body, Zapdos could still manage to fry any Wigglytuff or Jigglypuff that some Stupid Humans tried to use against it.

“Good for hugs?”

“Yes, very good for hugs.”

Tiny Human hummed and leaned his head against the egg. Then suddenly sat back up, blinked at the egg and leaned his head against it again, eyes closed. “I hear knocking.”

White Human cocked his head, studying the egg. “Well, that probably means it’s going to—”

A large crack appeared around the top of the egg. Tiny Human’s eyes went wide.

“Hatch soon.” White Human finished as another crack spiderwebbed out from the first one.

Zapdos stared at the egg curiously. It had never seen a Pokémon egg hatch before. It had no nestmates, and most Pokémon at its old nest avoided making their own nests near its roost.

“WhaddIdo? WhaddIdo?” Tiny Human shrieked, as a new long crack appeared on the egg.

Be quiet, for one, Zapdos thought sardonically. The Igglybuff would probably be more afraid of tiny Human's screeching than the Big Humans at this rate.

“Hold it!” White Human brought his own hands up, just in case Tiny Human dropped the egg, but even with the excitement and surprise, Tiny Human kept a steady hold on the egg.

Wait... It finally hit Zapdos.

Tiny Human was holding a hatching egg! That hatchling better be safe after all this, or Zapdos was going to fryWhite Human, prank be damned! Tiny Human, on the other hand, would just be ignored for the next several weeks. No, it wasn't going easy on Tiny Human. White Human just should have known better than to hand Tiny Human an egg that close to hatching.

It took maybe twenty minutes for the small Igglybuff to push itself out of the egg. It paused every couple of minutes to gather itself for the next push, and Tiny Human refused to let go the entire time.

“Nu-uh, Mister Assistant Professor.” Tiny Human said as White Human attempted to take the Igglybuff and the remains of the egg from him. “I wanna be here when he comes out!”

“Igglybuff have a much higher rate of being born female, so this will probably be a she and not a he.” white Human said automatically.

Tiny Human shook his head. “This one’s a he. I knows it.”

Zapdos wondered how right Tiny Human was. It could probably tell if it were released, as female and male Pokémon had different scents, but alas, it was still in its Great Ball.

White Human wiped down the Igglybuff—who refused to stop screeching in alarm—and confirmed that it was indeed, a male Igglybuff. He looked surprised at something.

Zapdos wasn't surprised that Tiny Human was right. Tiny Human wasn't very... good at learning things —he just had too much energy to sit still—, but he had some of the best instincts Zapdos had ever seen in a human.

After all, not any human's instincts would let it relax around Zapdos. And look at where Zapdos was now, the glorified babysitter of Tiny Human, and more amused than it had been for decades.

“Lemme hold him again!” Tiny Human tugged at Willow’s lab coat. “He wants me!”

White Human froze, and Zapdos knew that he was putting the pieces together.

Tiny Human chose the one egg that hatched not even thirty seconds into his holding it. And the second White Human had taken the Pokémon from Tiny Human up to clean him, the Igglybuff had started screeching. It was still screeching, to Zapdos' slight annoyance. It tried to be courteous enough to give the hatchling some slack.

“Okay.” White Human handed the screeching Igglybuff to Tiny Human. Almost immediately the hatchling settled down.

Much better.

“See?” Tiny Human said, a note of defiance in his tone. “I told you.”

White Human rubbed the space between his brows. “Yes, you were right."

Big Humans did that a lot around Tiny Human, Zapdos noticed. Especially when Tiny Human was proven right.

Zapdos ruffled its feathers back into place once it was released out of its Great Ball.

“Look Fearow!” Tiny Human held the tiny Igglybuff up, still securely wrapped in the blanket. “I got an Igglybuff! Imma call him Mister Iggles.”

Mr. Iggles? Mr. Iggles? Zapdos did not want to know how Tiny Human came up with that name. If that was an example of Tiny Human's naming abilities, then it got off lightly when it was mistaken for a Fearow.

Despite its confusion as to how Tiny Human's brain worked—a common occurrence at this point—Zapdos leaned down to get a better look at Tiny Human's new friend. Zapdos supposed he was to be its friend as well, but it was reserving judgement on that score.

He was kind of cute, like Tiny Human was when they first met. Not that Zapdos was ever admitting that to any 'mon. It would never live that down.

Mr. Iggles cheered and waved small paws at Zapdos, inadvertently smacking the much larger Pokémon's beak. Zapdos pulled itself out of Mr. Iggle's reach.

It had moxie; Zapdos rather liked that.

“We gotta take care of him and make sure he grows up really, really strong. Alright?” Tiny Human told it.

Zapdos nodded, careful of its beak. If Mr. Iggles—Arceus, Zapdos hoped it got used to that name soon—was to join itself and Tiny Human, he had to be strong. Zapdos would help.

Besides, Zapdos was interested in how a Legendary trained Igglybuff would fare. The results were sure to be hilarious.

Some years later...

“Spark, did you teach your Wigglytuff Giga Impact?” Blue Human asked.

“Whua?” Tiny Human yanked the pen out of his mouth.

Blue Human leaned back out of the spittle zone.

Zapdos listened in interestedly. Mr. Iggles—Zapdos had finally become used to the name, though it still questioned how the name came to be—had become very formidable as the years had passed, and it was always amused at the things that occurred around the pink, surprisingly vicious, and often underestimated Pokémon.

“No, I didn’t. That would be irresponsible.” Tiny Human protested.

Blue Human did not look the least bit impressed.

“Then he got into the TM discs and taught himself, because I just saw him use it on a wild Persian.”

See? Underestimated. Mr. Iggles was almost as amused as Zapdos was over the whole matter, though its pride often took a hit when it was dismissed so easily.

Mr. Iggles got violent when its pride was hurt.

Tiny Human’s eyes widened and he scrambled to his feet.

“Noooo!” Tiny Human yelled as he dashed outside, dodging Blue Human.

“Mister Iggles, overkill is bad! We don’t want to permanently maim the wild Pokémon!”

Zapdos snickered to itself in its Great Ball. It couldn't wait to hear how Mr. Iggles had broken into the stack of TMs and taught himself the move.

Maybe it would help Zapdos learn Giga Impact?

Zapdos actually can learn Giga Impact from TMs. I'm imagining some very serious "OH SHIT" faces when/if Zapdos learns the move.

Zapdos Terminology (in order of appearance):

nestling (noun) - a young child in terms of life experience. Equivalent to a 4 to 9 year old human.

(the Big) White Human - Professor Willow; the moment Zapdos dropped "the Big" is the moment Zapdos decided it liked Willow.

mature - an adult in terms of life experience. Equivalent to an 18+ year old human

Chansey Humans - Human Doctors or Nurse Joys. In this case, human doctors

nest - home

Big Human - adults/older trainers

sire - father

Stupid Human - trainers who try to attack/capture Zapdos. Zapdos doesn't really respect them.

Blue Human - Blanche

hatchling - a baby in terms of life experience. Equivalent to a newborn to three year old human

...Hi?

I know I said in some comments that I'd have a fic up a couple of weeks after Red Human, Blue Human, Tiny Human, R Human was published last month, but real life hit me like a train and ToukoTai mentioned they were in the middle of writing a fic about hatching Mr. Iggles. I figured I'd wait for them.

Then I downloaded Mystic Messenger, and my life started revolving around that game and my cell phone.

NOTE: This is officially the last segment of The Adventures of Zapdos and its Tiny Human which directly correlates to The Electric Slide. After this, it's all my brain, and various suggestions readers have given me that I finally get off my lazy butt to write.

As always, my askbox is open if you see room for improvement, or if you have suggestions for the series. Assuming I write every suggestion I've been given so far and ones I've thought of myself, the series will be a minimum of 22 installments. What.

[tori10rambles]

Title:GGWP (Good Game Well Played)

Im finally done ; u; I hope I didnt make you wait so long. I did my best. (Its my first time drawing pokemon. It came out well tho surprisingly..) Thanks for the wonderful fic that inspired me to draw once again. (Its been years..of art block) hope you like 😶

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are no words to express my joy at this piece of amazing art. It’s like you literally captured the image straight out of my head. No seriously, the clothes and the poses are basically everything I imagined when writing How is He an Ace Trainer? and I love this and you’re awesome and holy cow, I cannot believe someone made fanart of my fanfic.

This was totally worth the wait.

For the record, tumblr was weird when I queued this. This was an anonymous submission, although I knew that this fanart was coming for the last week.

[tori10rambles]

Headcanons/World Building for The Adventures of Zapdos and Its Tiny Human

Currently including:

World Building (Universe Headcanons)

Future Adventures of Zapdos and Tiny Human (aka oneshot ideas)

Zapdos characterization notes

Why Spark Doesn’t Realize the Truth (spoiler free up to How Is He an Ace Trainer?)

Also, reminding everyone that my askbox is open to suggestions for Section 2, though depending on how much Zapdos-Muse likes it, it may or may not be written.

World Building (Universe Headcanons):

I'm using it/its as a pronoun for Zapdos because Zapdos is genderless, not human, and a living force of electricity.

This universe is more like the games than the anime: Pokémon don't say their names when they're calling out.

In line with the main games, not everyone gets a pokédex.

These stories are constantly being edited, because I lack a beta, self-editing only goes so far, and I'm always finding ways to tweak the stories to make them flow better. However, edited versions will not be found on tumblr, but on ao3.

I'm not writing the oneshots in chronological order, so some parts of earlier fics may be redundant when you read everything in series order on ao3.

Future Oneshots/Ideas (in order of likelihood of being written probably):

The Hatching of Mr. Iggles

The jig is up (aka Spark finds out exactly what his first pokemon is, featuring Professor Willow/)

Zapdos can no longer stay in denial (aka Zapdos admits it loves Tiny Human)

Zapdos brags about its Tiny Human to the other Legendary Birds

Zapdos takes a nap, and loses Tiny Human

Spark tries to make Zapdos a nest (aka Zapdos learning how to live in a human house)

the Cycling Road Accident

Zapdos and Tiny Human's First Day at the Labs (aka Spark meets Blanche and Candela, and tries to make his part of the lab a home)

Zapdos and Its New Followers (aka the birth/induction of Team Instinct)

Shiny Fearow? (aka Spark and Zapdos run into an ACTUAL Fearow, as requested by tumblr anon)

Zapdos characterization notes

Zapdos is essentially Spark’s older sibling. It has hidden protective instincts towards Spark and Spark's other pokémon

Zapdos doesn’t really understand humans. It's picked up a lot from the Big Humans who try to capture it, and occasionally used to observe them from afar, but it doesn't get humans

Zapdos is kind of a troll because it thinks messing with humans is amusing.

Zapdos is probably at the teenager stage of its lifespan, so trolling is fun. Also, Zapdos didn't have long with its own parents, and no one's gone off on it yet for its actions, so Zapdos figures it's allowed to continue messing with people, so long as no one dies. Because killing humans will probably get Lugia's attention. Or Ho-Oh. Or Arceus. Which... no.

As of How Is He an Ace Trainer?, Zapdos has been with Spark for Two years. Two years is like nothing in comparision to what it's lived, and its lifespan in general. It hasn't had that much relative time with Tiny Human compared to decades of Big Humans trying to catch it, so yes, it's in denial still—trying to accept that humans aren't all greedy, power hungry idiots after it because it's a Legendary—finding it hard to believe that Tiny Human really doesn't care about its power.

As pkmn-trainer-touko-tajiri says, Zapdos and Spark are kind of like Calvin and Hobbes

Why Spark Doesn’t Realize the Truth

Some people may be wondering how the hell seven year old Spark hasn’t figured out that Zapdos is... Zapdos, despite everything.

Spark legitimately has not seen a Fearow before. He still hasn’t thanks to some really weird luck, and some crafty manipulation courtesy of Zapdos. All Spark knows is that Fearow is a Flying-Type with spiky feathers and a long beak.

See my universe headcanons? Yeah, Zapdos isn’t saying “Zapdos” every time it opens it mouth. It makes legitimate bird noises instead.

Zapdos is purposefully not using its Electric moves, and is trying not to cause thunderstorms all the time. It is a troll, and the game is too fun.

Spark isn't the best at school, and thinks school's not interesting unless they're learning about pokémon. And he ignores the teacher when they talk about pokémon he's already met/learned how to care for, like "Fearow." So while the teacher was showing everyone a picture of an actual Fearow, Spark was drawing on some scratch paper, and wondering what his mom was making for dinner.

tl;dr: Spark isn’t stupid, and he’s not that oblivious. Zapdos is just a really good troll who’s taking advantage of the fact that Spark has never met a Fearow before, and made an assumption.

Next time: Spark Headcanons/Characterization Notes, Rumors about the Zapdos Trainer, updates on any of above topics

[tori10rambles]

Red Human, Blue Human, Tiny Human, R Human

also found on ao3 here

Because I started this series with Zapdos’ POV of pkmn-trainer-touko-tajiri's fic, and this series will (chronologically) end with it. Any other installments of this series will occur somewhere between Tiny Human and this fic. At least, that's the plan right now. Just like with Tiny Human, credit for all dialogue belongs to pkmn-trainer-touko-tajiri, and is used with their permission.

Zapdos-Muse is being demanding, hence why I just published three fics in a little over a week. Don't expect this trend to continue, especially with real life butting its ugly head in again.

If you have suggestions on what kind of adventures Zapdos and its Tiny Human should go on, the askbox is open. Please see the list of future adventures before suggesting though, and again, I don't promise that your suggestion will be written. It depends on Zapdos-Muse, who's as much of a troll as Zapdos is. Obviously.

Also I'm warning you now, fight scenes are not a thing I am good at.  See the end of the post for more notes, as they could be spoilers otherwise.

Summary (from ao3):

It wanted to meet Red Human and Blue Human already, and the R Humans were in the way. Besides, they tried to attack Tiny Human. Zapdos had nearly fried Small Humans for picking on him, when Tiny Human was a fledgling himself. Attacking Tiny Human was much worse, and deserved so much more than being fried.

Or: Zapdos' POV of Chapter 1 of ToukoTai's The Electric Slide

"Have you ever, actually caught a wild pokémon?"

 Zapdos, who had been lightly dozing in its pokéball, woke up and snickered.

 That was Blue Human, and Blue Human had asked the best question to Tiny Human.

 Zapdos couldn't wait to see what Tiny Human said.

 "What?" Tiny Human yelled. Zapdos would have snickered some more if it weren't for the extremely close call; Tiny Human had nearly dropped the egg! How dare he! It was two, maybe three weeks away from hatching, and Tiny Human nearly dropped it!

 “What kind of trainer would I-why would you think that?” Tiny Human spluttered.

 “Every pokémon you’ve ever shown me has been one you hatched yourself. And the parents are pokémon we’ve supplied," Blue Human said. "I was wondering if you’d ever caught one yourself.”

 Zapdos knew for a fact that was a lie. Blue Human was assuming wrong.

 Tiny Human adopted many pokémon who were abandoned or injured, though he didn't "catch" them until after they were healed, and with their explicit permission. Oftentimes, those pokémon found an empty pokéball of his and caught themselves instead of waiting for Tiny Human to ask. Those that stayed were just as protective and hardworking as any of Tiny Human's other pokémon.

 The only reason why Blue Human never saw those pokémon was because they liked staying in the forest outside of the Shiny Building?, or in Tiny Human's rooms, and avoided other humans. While they trusted Tiny Human, other humans were often viewed with suspicion. Tiny Human accepted their behavior with a smile, and worked hard to let those pokémon maintain their privacy.

 Not to mention the pokémon Tiny Human hatched from eggs given to him from family members, and Glasses-Egg Human.

 Like Mr. Iggles, not that he got to "play" very often. The years had only made Mr. Iggles far more menacing than one would expect of a Wigglytuff.

 “What’s going on in here?” Red Human poked her head into the room.

 “I was asking Spark if he’d ever caught a wild pokémon,” Blue Human replied.

 Red Human laughed. “Well of course he has.” She turned to Tiny Human once she stopped. "Haven't you?"

 Zapdos wasn't sure whether to be annoyed—did they not trust Tiny Human's words? —or amused, because Tiny Human had caught one pokémon—Zapdos—and the story was generally unbelievable.

 You just had to ask White Human. He still snickered about it to this day. Though that may be because Tiny Human found out the truth in White Human's presence.

 So, how would Tiny Human answer Red Human and Blue Human?

 The truth meant Zapdos laughing at Tiny Human the next time it was released, possible ridicule from Red Human and Blue Human, and Zapdos attempting to fry Red Human and Blue Human if they did make fun of Tiny Human. Tiny Human may like Red Human and Blue Human more than the Small Humans of his childhood—the ones that picked on him—but Zapdos wouldn't care if it meant protecting Tiny Human.

 A lie would save Tiny Human's dignity, but annoy Zapdos—wasn't Tiny Human proud he had caught Zapdos? —and make it pick on Tiny Human once it was released. Not to mention Tiny Human would eventually get caught and punished for lying, as he didn't have a Fearow.

 Tiny Human wouldn't be winning no matter how he answered, so Zapdos settled down in its pokéball and waited.

 Tiny Human—for his own part—looked betrayed.

 Red Human acknowledged this with, "It’s just, I’ve never seen one you caught before.”

 Tiny Human sounded offended as he replied, "I’ll have you know, one time I caught a Fearow."

 He was going for the truth!

 Zapdos cackled to itself, glad that sound could not escape its pokéball. There was only one way this was going to end, so long as they kept questioning Tiny Human.

 Red Human and Blue Human stared at him, as if they knew there was more to the story than that.

 "Okay, I thought it was a Fearow, at the time." Tiny Human said.

 "Was it a Spearow?" Red Human asked.

 "OhlookatthetimeIhavetogobye!" Tiny Human yelled as he ran from Red Human and Blue Human, egg in hand.

 Zapdos just managed to spot Blue Human and Red Human look suspiciously at Tiny Human as he ran away. Zapdos knew it liked those two humans! At least, as much as Zapdos liked human who weren't Tiny Human. They were quick on the uptake. If only they didn't choose Articuno and Moltres.

 It would be worse, Zapdos knew, if those two humans had found their Legendary Bird. Tiny Human—and Zapdos itself—would never live it down from the other two Birds, who still did not know the details of how Zapdos had met Tiny Human.

 All they needed to know was that Tiny Human had asked. And Arceus knew Zapdos had rubbed that fact in their faces every time it visited them.

  They were quite jealous.

 Zapdos kind of wanted to meet Red Human and Blue Human. Maybe it would introduce Moltres and Articuno to them if they were acceptable enough?

 Well, only if they didn't pick on Tiny Human once the reveal occurred, maybe. After all, its fellow Birds shouldn't be stuck with mean humans. And picking on Tiny Human was still Zapdos' job not that Zapdos meant it very often, if at all.

 Berries for thought.

Despite the fact that Zapdos often spent the night sleeping in Tiny Human's nesting chamber—occasionally with Tiny Human and his other pokémon, and occasionally in its personal nest—Zapdos hadn't got to meet Red Human and Blue Human until 14 days had passed.

 The Stupid R Humans tried to hurt its Tiny Human.

 Unfortunately for the R Humans, Tiny Human had only had Zapdos and a recently hatched baby pokémon—she'd hatched from the egg Tiny Human had been caring for two weeks ago and was literally minutes old, too young for battling—on hand.

 Tiny Human tossed its pokéball with nary a word.

 That was okay, Zapdos was loud enough in its anger for both of them, screeching as it was released.

 It started off with a Thunderbolt at the Water-types on hand, and took special glee in frying the Gyarados. It always did.

 It was soothing to Zapdos' pride, though frying those Gyarados would never make up for the time Zapdos didn't fry that one Gyarados from when Tiny Human was seven and still believed it was a Fearow.

 That would not be happening again if Zapdos could help it.

 From behind it, Red Human sounded angry. “You mistook Zapdos for a Fearow?”

 "I was five at the time!" Tiny Human yelled back.

 Zapdos caught an updraft and summoned an array of Light Screens, which a series of Ice beams bounced off of, leaving Zapdos unharmed.

 Red Human became louder. "A Zapdos for a Fearow?"

 Yes, Red Human. Tiny Human had mistaken it for a Fearow as a fledgling. Repeating things did not make them any less true.

 Tiny Human replied, "The feathers looked the same!"

 Zapdos dive-bombed at the Fighting-Types with a Drill Peck. It was super effective!

 "They look nothing alike!" Red Human was shrieking now.

 Her yells were starting to irritate Zapdos, and it flew above the clouds for cover—dodging a couple of Rock Throws and a Stone Edge while it was at it—and to save its ears. Maybe she should be fried next? No, Tiny Human would just start crying again.

 Or worse, keep away the poffins and cakes. Zapdos liked those. They were probably the best part of being a caught pokémon.

 You know, besides the adventures. Not that Zapdos got to go on many of those anymore what with Tiny Human being stuck in the Shiny Building, or off doing things for White Human.

 "I was five! I'd never seen a Fearow before! Or Zapdos!"

 And that was probably the main reason why Zapdos hadn't fried Tiny Human for the mistake. The fact that Tiny Human was extremely apologetic once he found out helped. It could have done without the tears though. Or the apparent depression. Tiny Human deserved to be happy, though Zapdos reserved the right to poke holes in his ego if needed.

 And Tiny Human stopped referring to it as Fearow, allowing Zapdos to finally use its electric attacks.

  Well, except for those moments when Tiny Human wanted to teach bullies or Pokémon thieves a lesson. Nothing was more terrifying than facing Zapdos after expecting a Fearow.

  Zapdos, troll that it was, enjoyed these moments immensely, due to their rarity. Having Tiny Human in on the joke was great too.

 Zapdos descended from the thundercloud it had been hiding in. With a flap of its wings, launched simultaneous Thunderbolts at the R Humans and their remaining pokémon, making them scatter like leaves in the wind. Albeit with a lot more screaming and flailing than leaves did.

 It wanted to check on Tiny Human, and finally meet Red Human and Blue Human. The R Humans were in its way.

 Besides, they tried to attack Tiny Human. Zapdos had nearly fried Small Humans for picking on him, when Tiny Human was a fledgling himself.

 Attacking Tiny Human was much worse, and deserved so much more than being fried.

 With a gleeful cry, Zapdos prepared a Hyper Beam in its beak.

 The R Humans would pay.

 Smoke and screams filled the air.

In case you missed it: Red Human is Candela, Blue Human is Blanche, Glasses-Egg Human is Professor Elm, White Human is Professor Willow, and R Humans are Team Rocket Grunts. The identifiers are not racism, or indicative of race at all. Zapdos just decided that since Spark actually cares about those three, they need proper identifiers. Said identifiers are their main color. Shiny Building is Professor Willow's Lab.

[tori10rambles]

Zapdos and Tiny Human encounter an actual Fearow. Tiny Human gets confused as to what Pokemon it's supposed to be. Is it a Pidgeot? It does have a plume on its head after all...

Ooh. So this is set before the Reveal (caps needed)…

I might be able to work with this. 

Thanks anon!