#Take with grain of salt - not exactly sad but will probably feel much dandier another time
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#Take with grain of salt - not exactly sad but will probably feel much dandier another time#Tonight I want so much to create - to make stories that will make others love what is good and true and beautiful#I have a condition which (among a lot of other things that are irrelevant to this post) causes me to feel very tired a lot of the time.#and I also tend to go through bouts of insomnia - in the middle of one now.#It's small potatoes compared to what a lot of my friends have to go through health-wise and I am grateful#(though i probably should be more so)#But - the point. I am just so tired all the time and I try to soldier through and be creative because that's the way my heart is shaped#But so often I just feel like the exhaustion sabotages everything and tonight I am just aching to be more creative than I've been#I'm not unhopeful about it - so many people go through this after all and end up making wonderful art. And there's something to be said for#patience and filling the creative well and trusting all to God. But tonight I feel - not sorry for myself thankfully - just very wistful.#Wanting to make something really beautiful and see it through the end and be more resilient in the face of the tiredness.#(Ha - my life is a good one if that's what's making me wistful!)#God can do whatever He wants with it and maybe the greater glory is for another time.#But I also wonder... I would not have been calling to Him unless He has been calling to me - and I hope!#OK - sentimental pout over. ;-)#neverending storytellers
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