#TESSA IM SO SORRY IM SO SORRY IM SORRY GOD BLESS YOU IF YOU EVEN READ ALL OF THIS 😭😭😭

[tempportal]

@dvarapala l continued from x

Five has barely even stepped through the door, and he's already completely and totally overwhelmed. He prepared himself pretty thoroughly, or so he'd thought, for a great number of unpleasant receptions when he finally accepted one of Gaira's incessant invitations last week — it could very well be an ambush after all, his sworn nemesis and a couple of her fellow superheroes lying in wait for him, ready to attack the instant he came inside, but that sort of underhanded trickery simply doesn't correspond with Gaira's usual behavior, so he'd dismissed the theory almost as quickly as he'd postulated it, and moved onto likelier hypotheses.

Perhaps she had just wanted to see if he would actually fall for it, see if he would actually allow himself to believe the tentative bit of... trust friendship whatever they'd established during their alliance against the Puppet Master would still hold up now that they no longer shared a common enemy. Perhaps she had just wanted to exact a bit of vengeance now that he was finally willing to give her the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps she would laugh in his face when she saw him on her front porch, because god, Five, who would ever willingly spend time with you? did you seriously think we were actually friends, or something? believe me, I'm not that desperate! and then she'd slam the door on him, go back to her quiet, villain-free night with her mother, and forget all about him.

Or perhaps she gave him the wrong address. Perhaps she just wanted to ensure he understands that the nebulous, nameless Whatever they established during their alliance was a product of forced proximity, and it would never survive concrete reality. Or perhaps she was being genuine when she invited him, but she's changed her mind since the last time he saw her, and she'll send him away with one of her sheepish, apologetic smiles.

Any of those outcomes would be perfectly fine, of course. Five isn't particularly fussed about them. He does not desire Gaira's acceptance in any form or fashion. He does not desire anyone's acceptance in any form or fashion. He's above such trivial things.

Still, he has a very specific procedure in mind for each and every one of her potential reactions, so it's... surprising and unexpected and a little bit terrifying when he doesn't have to use them.

Because Gaira (or, Udyati, technically, since she's not in costume right now, but using her civilian name is a very slippery slope to being friendly, and he is above such trivial things, remember, so he refuses to do anything that could ever possibly be construed in that manner) positively beams at him the moment she lays eyes on him, her whole face lighting up like a Christmas tree, and immediately unleashes a barrage of information that he can't even begin to keep up with. There's something about vegetarians in there, for sure, and also something about Diwali (which he knows is a Hindu holiday, but that's about where his knowledge taps out) and then she tosses out a bunch of names he only sort of vaguely recognizes, and he's trying to match them to the faces of all those annoying little friends of hers, and then she's telling him to leave his shoes in the hallway. Five's skin prickles at the very thought, itching with discomfort — the convenient thing about teleportation is that he can just leave a situation whenever he feels like it, but the inconvenient thing about teleportation is that he has to keep all his essentials on his person at all times for a quick escape and, personally, he would very much consider his shoes to be one of those essentials. How is he supposed to get out when this whole thing inevitably turns sour if he doesn't have his shoes?

This was a mistake, Five realizes, blind panic and burning shame twisting up around each other like twin serpents in his stomach. This was a terrible, horrible, foolish mistake, one that he should have known better than to make — one that he did know better than to make, if he's being perfectly honest with himself. This was an absolutely imbecilic mistake, and he needs to go back to the lair right now, while the evening is still semi-salvageable.

But.

He doesn't.

Five pulls in a deep breath, leaves his shoes in the hallway, and follows Gaira deeper into the house.

Now that he's finally taking a proper look around (mostly to try and distract himself, so he doesn't go completely off his chump and blink away before he even reaches the kitchen) he's struck by what a nice house his nemesis lives in. his lair is something of a palace in comparison to the boys' home, but this is something else entirely. it's wonderfully warm, especially in contrast to the cold autumn wind blowing outside, with electric lamps throwing golden pools of light everywhere. The floorboards remain steady under his feet, and the windowpanes are intact. He wonders idly if this roof leaks something awful when it rains, or if the inside gets as dreadfully cold as the outside in the winter, like his lair.

But, to tell the truth, the luxury isn't what really catches his eye, as fantastic and unbelievable as it is. It's the touches of life all around the place — the throw pillows and afghans on the sofa, the decorations on the walls, the framed photographs on every available surface, pictures of a much younger Gaira grinning at him from all possible angles.

And then he's in the kitchen, caught in the eye of another storm of color and light and noise, and his breath trapped somewhere in the back of his throat as he tries to figure out what he's meant to do in this moment, and how Gaira's mother could possibly smile at the boy who's left her daughter with more bruises than he can even count.

(Gaira did the same thing, he realizes, when she opened the door and saw him on her porch. No one has ever looked at him like that. No one has ever been happy to see him.

This can't be real.)

"...Okay?" Five says, finally, when his sticky-slow brain eventually registers her offer of chai, like he has any clue what chai is. It's not like he'll turn his nose up at it, whatever they serve him — any food is good food, after all. You take what you can get and you count yourself lucky every night you don't go to bed hungry. He winces at the sound of his own voice in his ears, so small and pathetic in a way Number Five never is, and quickly tries to get back some modicum of control. He needs to do something, he needs to distract himself from the absolute clusterfuck going on in his head right now. "I-I can... help? With the table?" Is that allowed?

[wagner-fell]

Spiders Are Ugly And Other Lies Capitalism Has Told Us (part one)

“Dad,” Astrid called out, shutting the coral coloured front door behind her. “Are you home?”

She dumped her cream tote bag spray painted with the words ‘Washing Machine Heart’ in big, rainbow letters onto one of the stools facing the granite countertop. The rest of the Merry Hoes followed suit. It was weird seeing a person as chaotic as Astrid in such a calm environment.

They were all spending the summer in LA with Astrid and her Dad. It had taken a while for Kevin to convince his family it was a good idea. Especially because he and Blessica had finally put years of pinning behind them. Making out on Kit’s bed at Mina’s third birthday party certainly wasn’t the way they had envisioned it but as the longing was over with, they were happy.

The Chu’s didn’t love the idea of their son living in a different country for three months with his girlfriend but we’re on board once Kevin assured them there was no possible way Blessica could get pregnant.

Kit wasn’t officially sleeping at the Yang’s but at the Institute with his boyfriend. Julian wasn’t so thrilled about the situation but Emma was. She was positively ecstatic about having a training partner as skilled as Kit was, courtesy of Jem and Tessa. Though staying a thirty minute drive away (on the wrong side of the road, Mari noted) wouldn’t keep Kit away for long. Even now he was with them instead of having his own reunion make out session.

Speaking of making out…

Mari rested their chin on the top of Astrid’s head and wrapped their arms around her middle. “Why don’t you show us your room while we wait for your dad to get home.”

It was kinda perfect, Mari often remarked, that she realized her feelings for their best friend weren’t so platonic as she previously led herself to believe at the same time they and Kit realized they were better off as just platonic.

Astrid hit her hand playfully. “That’s not fair!” she whined! ”How dare you take advantage of my constant hornyness when my God-fearing Presbyterian father could be in the next room? Shame! Shame on you, shame on your family, shame on your cow.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s ‘dishonor’”, said Kit, who didn’t even look up from his phone when he addressed her, “but go off I guess.”

Astrid looked like she was questioning all her life choices up to this point. “A white boy knows Mulan better than me.” She shook her head in disgust. Mari could feel the loose hairs of her girlfriend’s ponytail ticking her exposed collar bone. “Mulan.”

Mari laughed before softly brushing their lips against Astrid mop of bleached strands of pastel yellow, pink and blue mixed magnificently with her natural inky black.

“Is hornyness even a word?” Kevin wondered aloud as he observed the knickknacks placed at even intervals utop the kitchen cabinets. Blessica was with him. She was gazing at one of a crab steering a ship when she spotted a slim piece of paper taped below it.

“Ast,” she called. The both looked in her direction, despite Blessica needing the attention of one. “Your dad says he won’t be home till seven. Emergency at work.”

“Which leaves us more than enough time to pack and head over to meet Ty, Dru and Thaìs at the arcade,” said Kit. He finally turned his phone off and shoved it into the back pocket of his ripped jeans. “Marstrid can do the ol’ devil’s tango then catch up to us.”

‘Marstrid’ wrinkled their noses. “I thought we agreed on Astari, Christopher.”

“Astari sounds gayer,” confirmed Kevin, his eyes never leaving the miniature decorations.

“Not to be rude but why does Astari sound gayer?” asked a visibly confused Blessica.

“Because,” answered Mari, unraveling herself from Astrid to slide onto one of the bar stools and reaching into the Jolly Rancher jar, blindly searching for a green, “Astari has ‘star’ in it. Star equals astrology. An obsession with astrology is the price you pay for the gay agenda. Besides, Marstrid sounds like an old southern lady.” Then she furrowed her eyebrows and swiveled to face Astrid. “Southern is Texas, right?” Astrid nooded, a smile so big the Cheshire Cat would be jealous.

Without looking, she stuck her hand in the jar and pulled out a green apple flavoured hard candy on her first try. She held it out to Mari, who snatched it out of her hand with an angry huff.

“Hey, Ast, where do you guys keep the crisps?” asked Kevin when he finished inspecting all the knickknacks.

“Uh, under the barbecue sauce, I think.”

Kit’s eyes lit up. “So I’m sitting there”- Astrid understood what was happening in just enough time to quote- “barbecue sauce on my titties” in unison.

Mari put her head into their open palms, still sucking on the pity candy. “Why is this my type?”

“Are you sure this is the right place?” asked Blessica as Kit attempted to parallel park outside the location Ty had texted him to meet at. Key word, attempt. When Tessa had taught him to drive, he’d been such a disaster at parallel parking she had instructed him to ‘take the underground when tight spaces might be a possibility.’ Which he prided himself in doing. But this was America and the underground was called the subway, so, technically, no rules were being broken.

“Yes, Blessie, I’m certain.”

“Okay. Just checking cause a few turns back the GPS said-”

“Blessie!” He nearly crashed into the car in front of him.

“Right. Shutting up.”

When Kit managed to park with minimal damage and the three were about to exit, the voice of Nicki Minaj boomed from his pocket. Ty was calling him. He accepted the call, putting it on speaker.

“Hello Tiberius.” There was giggling from the other end of the line. A groan soon followed it.

“It’s been a year,” came the annoyed voice of Dru. “Get over your British kink already.” Kevin’s laughter echoed from the backseat.

“Hey Ty!

“Hi Kevin.”

”Hey Dru!”

“Fuck off.”

“Ouch. Why do you feel the need to hurt me so?” Blessica laughed.

“Hey…Thaìs?”

“Here,” replied Thaìs cheerfully.

“Are you here yet,” asked Ty.

“Uh, yeah! We were just getting out of the rental car when you called. You didn’t tell me it was going to be crowded. I had to parallel park!”

“What are you talking about?” interrupted Dru. ”There are only four cars in the parking lot.”

“But,” Ty countered, “there are lots of Billy’s Fun Zones’ around here. You guys must have got mixed up and taken a wrong turn. I could have sworn I sent you the correct location on GPS.” Maybe Ty said more on the subject but Kit could hear anything or see anything except the superior smirk Blessica was giving him.

He covered the speaker. “Not. A. Word.” And no word came out of her mouth the entire ride to the correct Billy’s Fun Zone but the ‘I told you so’ look on her face spoke loud enough.

Kit slid back into the booth next to Ty, handing him his pretzel. Ty kissed him on the check in gratitude.

Dru and Ty were right. About this one being empty. He told him he had heard about it from Alyssa. Her pack frequented it often. They were left alone because, well, there was no one else there to bother them.

“Where are Astrid and Mari?” he asked.

“Fucking. I think. Or maybe just making out. I’ll know which one when they finish.” When Ty gave him a puzzled look he continued, “Astrid describes it all to me in full detail. I honestly don’t know whether she doesn’t have a filter or she just needs someone to scream to about how amazing Mari is.”

“Why can’t it be both?”

“True, true.”

They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Ty picked up the conversation again. “When Thaìs first met Astrid, she had a huge crush on her. They got along great. I always thought they would end up together. Or hook up at the very least.”

“Huh, that’s funny,” observed Kit.

“What is?”

“When me and Mari split, I was planning on trying to set them up with Thaìs. But then I caught her ans Astrid making out in a storage closet at school. Which, in hindsight, was pretty stupid cause they were in there so I wouldn’t be sad Mari moved on when I opened the door in the first place avoiding her to call you.”

“Hmmmm.”

The gears in Ty’s head were visibly turning. Kit loved watching this process. An idea was forming in his boyfriend’s genius mind, he could sense it.

“What is their stance on monogamy?” he asked finally.

“Um, fuck, hold on. Mari sent me this whole speech about it.” Kit scrolled through his phone at a rapid rate before he saw what he was looking for. He cleared his throat and began reading aloud.

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:52 AM: monogamy is just another lie capitalism has fed us

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:55 AM: like, for example, the notion that house spiders are ugly and to be feared

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:56 AM: it’s just to sell bug spray

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:56 AM: same with monogamy

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:56 AM: pointless!!!

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:58 AM: in conclusion, if I want to join a polyam cult, who tf is the government to stop me?

Kev-Kev, sent 2:01 AM: mari please go to sleep

Bless-ing_to_the_world, sent 2:04 AM: ^^^^^^^^^^^

Mitski_my_love, sent 2:05 AM: preach!

Mitski_my_love, sent 2:05 AM: go off queen

By the time Kit was finished with his dramatic reading, Ty’s plan was fully formed.

“That settles it! We are going to play matchmakers!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alyssa, Ty’s friend mentioned is @thechangeling OC, not mine.

@the-blackdale @the-wckd-powers @adoravel-fenomeno @thomas-gaypanic-lightwood @illusions-give-reasons-to-live @ithurielkeepsgettingkidnapped @im-not-ruined-im-ruination @sofiatheskeleton @cncnbr @its-taff @noah-herondale-lightwood @maxboythedog @arangiajoan @shelvesofgold @book-dragon-not-worm sorry if I missed anyone LMK if you want to be added or removed from The tag List!!

[spidcr-man]

filming  ↬ t.h

summary: accompanying tom to set is always fun pairing: tom holland x reader notes: it has been a hot minute since i’ve been able to sit down and write something! IM SO SORRY AGH!!! BUT spider-man: far from home started filming last week and we’re getting lots of good tom content which is always a blessing. i just love a soft mans! warnings: slightly (very slightly) nsfw = mentions of sex  also, like most of my writing, this was drafted pretty early in the morning. you can probably tell because the structure and ideas are everywhere. oh and it’s heavily unedited. date published: 071718

requests are currently open!

you tagged along to set quite often, however, some of your days were fairly uneventful

when tom was shooting scenes you’d normally be tucked away in his trailer, reading or keeping his dog tessa occupied

his best mate, harrison would sometimes pop in per tom’s request just to make sure you were alright

we love a thoughtful mans

tom’s home away from home was comfortable — definitely not that same as home but pretty comfortable

there was a good sized bed towards the back where you often took naps as well as a half kitchen that served no purpose to tom apart from being a tea/coffee station

even then, he had no time between scene takes to even think about making something extra to eat

because of this, his snack pantry was filled quite generously (despite his semi-strict diet)

this was a major bonus on days you needed a little something extra

the two of you definitely made sure to make the trailer look cozy 

before filming the two of you went shopping (despite tom’s protests) to pick up a few extra things to have on hand

you ended up getting TONS of soft blankets

you wanted to make everything as comfortable/neat as it could be since the two of you would be spending most of your days there

seeing tom act behind the scenes was a VERY rare opportunity for you

marvel is a very secretive company when it comes to their cinematic department and that fact doesn't change whether you happen to be dating a member of the cast

could you even imagine accidentally leaking s:ffh? i’m sweating just thinking about it!!!!

you felt like you had to sign about a zillion confidentiality contracts to JUST step foot on set 

it didn’t seem to matter that your only intention was to stay out of everyone else's way

though the set had catering, you often found yourself going to pick up special orders

the catering was normally very good, but some days you just craved something else — it’s really that simple

it first started with a simple request more of a look from zendaya

“hey z! i’m heading to the store to get some trash bags for tom’s trailer, do you need anything while i’m out?”

she’d only smile and YOU ALREADY KNEW WHAT SHE WAS GOING TO ASK OF YOU

“yes i’ll pick up that grilled avocado sandwich you like so much from the place across the street.”

you literally could not deny the queen herself a salad

i don’t actually know if she likes grilled avocado sandwiches oh well

she’d give you a big hug and a polite ‘thank you’ before scurrying to her own trailer

after all, the place was just across from the shop you were going to

one extra stop wouldn't be too much of a hassle

little did you know that this little habit would then prompt tom, jacob and harrison as well

“hey baby, z told me you were going to get something to eat?”

“well, i’m going to the store then picking something to eat for her and i. why?”

you already knew what was coming

tom only handed you a small folded piece of paper that was wrapped around his credit card

you unraveled the paper and noticed that it had three sandwich orders messily scribbled upon it

you playfully rolled your eyes and gave him a disbelieving look

“really, tom?”

he then just kissed your cheek and sprinted off shouting behind him as he ran down to his trailer, “THANK YOU! LOVE YOU!”

you honestly didn’t mind that much because it was usually on days you needed to run errands anyway

tom doesn't have a lot of downtime in between takes which means he is constantly tired

plus, some days the shoots run into very early morning hours

tom loves his job — he gets to be spider-man! — but sometimes all he wants to do is retire to his trailer, plop down on his bed and sleep for three months at a time

it isn’t uncommon for you to come back from running errands and find a sleeping tom completely wrapped up in a bundle of fluffy blankets while snuggling with tessa

sometimes trailer cuddles symbolized a cry to get comfortable

tom loves to cuddle in general but on some days he really just needs you to lay beside him in order to fall asleep and get a good rest

if he's had a particularly stressful or frustrating day, he’ll ask you to be the big spoon which you, of course, agree to

there are many occasions where tom only gets an hour for a break, which is hardly enough time to have a proper nap and snuggle, so you two do the best you can with couch cuddles

the trailer’s couch is in no way fit for cuddles, but you both make it work somehow

because the trailer is space limited, the couch is fairly narrow and can hardly fit the two of you lying horizontally

you’re either squished between tom and couch’s back or dangling off half the couch’s front

tom didn’t mind though, as long as he could get his daily cuddle in

literally being friends with every single person in the cast/crew

even on tom’s off days the two of you still manage to find yourself hanging out with jacob, zendaya and harrison

because you’re friends with pretty much everyone in the cast, it’s really hard to find alone time with tom

it seems like there's a constant stream of people coming in and out of the trailer even if they’re coming to just visit you

you didn’t mind all that much . . . well, except when you and tom are trying to get away with a quickie before he has to go 

you’d think the two of you would learn by now that doing it in what seems to be a secure area may not be all that secure 

or privacy protected

there had been a few close calls; once with zendaya and once with harrison

zendaya had just wrapped her shoots for the day and wanted to see if you wanted to grab dinner

the intention was pure but definitely not at the right time

the knock at the locked trailer door made you jump out of your own skin

the knocking only continued as you gave tom a frightened look

“IM COMING!” you called out, hearing tom snicker as you shot out of bed, scrambling to put clothes on

“correction, you were coming,” tom softly said above a whisper which causes you to throw a wide-eyed expression over your shoulder

trying to regain your composure, you answered the door to be met by a confused zendaya

at that point there was no sense in hiding, zendaya knew what was happening (she knows everything), but thank god she didn't say anything later that evening

hey she gets it, she’s a human too

who am i kidding? she probably brought it up a week later as a joke

and we love that about her

harrison, on the other hand, was completely oblivious to what was happening

haz had never been one to barge into tom’s trailer even if he was taking an excessively long pee break but tom REALLY needed to get back to set

the fact that you and tom thought you have time to get one in before he had to go back to set was quite funny looking back, but at that moment you just couldn't help yourselves

it was quite embarrassing but you’re pretty sure harrison permanently erased it from his memory (which is probably for the better)

honestly, you love going to set because it’s the little things that bring you and tom together

i wanna visit tom on set :(((((((

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[jeongincore]

Shit i really liked and kinda didn’t like about Ragnarok

I recently saw ragnarok and became so rejuvenated that i brought my marvel blog back but i wanted to seriously talk about like things that i liked and really didn’t just to get shit out there. 

Things i really liked (like so much that i am obsessed)

-Thor’s new hair cut/outfit, i think its actually super suitable. Gives that sort of cool ass warrior refugee look. Plus, Chris Hemsworth is beautiful. 

-The humor, oh god it was hilarious, i’ve never laughed so genuinely and so much in my life and it made the movie so charming and relatable. It was also such a departure from The Dark World and the first Thor, which dealt with so much emotional baggage for not only just Thor, but for Loki, who basically suffered throughout both movies. 

-Hulk being an actual toddler/Bruce Banner being so fucked up and anxious because WHEN DID HE GET ON AN ALIEN PLANET. 

-”You’ve been on other planets before i assume” “Yeah, one!” “well now it’s two” 

-Valkyrie. Her entire everything gave me so much to love and adore. Tessa Thompson has stole my heart yet again. 

-TAIKA WAITITI AS KORG WAS ACTUALLY SO FUNNY

-The little tiny glimpses of Loki and Thor’s childhood, aka the snake story, get help. It really showed how much time Loki and Thor had spent together, which i assume is a lot because age in Asgardian years work differently probably? Like imagine that, Loki and Thor spending time together and being inseparable for 100 years. It showed that they were always close despite loki feeling different or alienated, which explains why its so hard for Loki to just leave thor for dead. 

-”You’ll always be the god of mischief, but you can be so much more” See that shit destroyed me. Thor acknowledges that Loki is not like him. He’s a trickster, manipulative, and selfish. But he also acknowledges that Loki is so much more than his tricks and lies, which shows so much character growth in Thor, who sees loki as more than just an asgardian prince that was raised the exact same way opposite of Thor, but as his own fucking person.

-Thor actually not being stupid and falling for Loki’s tricks, aka his magic projections of himself/his petty, stupid betrayals. Tom mentioned that Thor was evolving and that Loki was finally starting to realize that he’s the only one not growing. Scenes like the betrayal scene and the snake scene, although meant to be hilarious, point out that Thor isn’t that idiot that just was too trusting of his brother, he sees through Loki’s tricks, he’s seen them for years, and it really shows that Loki’s getting predictable with his fake deaths and betrayals, which might hint at him changing? 

-IT FIXED THE INCONSISTENCIES. The main reason i didn’t like Dark world, though i did see it as amazing for its ability to mix the emotional darkness between Loki and Thor along with the humor throughout the movie, was because it pointed Loki out to be the type of cold blooded monster that would murder his own father. I mean I’m no Loki apologist, i love the kid but he’s killed, he’s manipulated, he’s hurt everyone around him, but i doubt he could ever kill Odin, no matter how much of a shitty father he is. Also low-key hated the whole “Loki if you betray me, ill kill you” Thor bullshit. We all know thor wouldn’t be able to do that, he still hopes Loki is his brother. 

-AGAIN, THE SNAKE SCENE WAS SO FUNNY. 

-”I thought the world of you Loki.” Ouch. 

-Hulk and Val’s bromance. 

-The entire Valkyrie v. Hela scene. It was so beautiful and ethereal i actually nutted. 

-LOKI DIDN’T NEED TO COME BACK. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE SHIP WITH THOR. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO ASGARD. HE COULD HAVE NOT. BUT HE DID. BECAUSE SOMEWHERE IN THERE UNDER THE SELFISHNESS MAYBE HE CARES.

-Loki’s face when odin called him his son. 

-Loki’s face when Hela told him to kneel. 

-Loki refusing to let Thor go back to Asgard. “Are you serious? you can’t be thinking of going back there, that’s madness!” is that? Loki cARING? 

-Loki’s character development. 

-thor in a jean jacket and hoodie in new york. 

-Thor spilling beer everywhere. 

-Loki letting Thor take the orgy ship. 

-Jeff Goldblum. Thats it. 

-LOKIS FACE WITH THOR AND ODIN ON THE ROOF OF THE CASTLE I SCREmed AFTER ALL LOKI DID HE WAS STILL PUT THERE AS A PRINCE OF ASGARD BYE.  

-”Hello father” “OH SHIT” 

-The entire play. Loki’s rule as a benevolent god/king in which, before everyone feared him for a dictatorship militaristic form of ruling he could have, but in reality he just like ate grapes and watched plays. 

-Thor wanting to be a Valkyrie. The crowned prince of asgard, wanting to be an elite team of woman warriors. 

-VAL IS GAY AND IN TESSA THOMPSONS WORDS, HAD A GIRLFRIEND THAT SACRIFICED HERSELF TO SAVE HER. 

-Val kicking Loki’s ass. 

-THE RETURN OF THE DOUBLE BLADES OUT OF NOWHERE. 

-Loki in a suit. 

-HEIMDALL I LOVEJWIFHTGE.

-”I thought you didn’t want to talk about it” “heres the thing” 

-”Hello!” “Hi” *blasts everyone in room with giant laser guns* 

-”What are you? Thor, god of hammers?” 

-IMMIGRANT SONG. 

-”i swear i left him right here” “where? on the street? Or in that nursing home thats being torn down?” 

“I’m not a witch” “Why do you dress like one then?” 

-Loki rolling his eyes when thor is approached by fans. 

-Loki calling stephen strange a shitty sorcerer and going at him with stabby hands. 

-Confirmation of loki’s love of stabbing. 

-Confirmation that Loki is a snake, and also Thor’s favorite snake.

-Loki reciting Thor’s prayer to odin with him mY SON. 

-The avengers parallel. “He’s my brother!” “adopted.” 

-”mbLERG ITS ME” 

-”AGH LOKI!” 

-’DIRECT ME TO WHO’S ASS I HAVE TO KICK” 

-”Where? the devil’s anus?” 

-Bruce fighting evil with fireworks. Good job sweetie. 

-Bruce flopping like a fish on the bifrost. 

-Thor and his sparkles. 

-Lightning eyes. 

-Odin finALLY DYING. THANK GOD. 

-*Loki on a death trip* ‘this is a terrible idea” 

-Loki somehow reciting a spell to bring surtur back. what a weirdo. how did he know that. 

-LOKI COMING BACK. 

-im here. 

-Loki

-Brodinson. 

-Thor and Bruce’s bromance. 

-Jane not being there. I mean it makes sense she dumped him, he left her for two years chasing down infinity stones and constantly almost dying while she had no way of contacting him because Thor’s ass didn’t know how to use fucking email. Also i just really honestly never liked her character to begin with, i mean sure i love that Jane is a strong, smart woman but tbh i just wanted to Fast forward every time she was on screen. 

-The cute death wolf. 

-”THATS HOW IT FEELS!” “sorry i just really like the sport” 

-THOR ACTUALLY BEING PORTRAYED AS LESS OF A JERK WITH CACTUSES SHOVED UP HIS RECTUM AND MORE LIKE THE SWEET, CHARMING, CHARISMATIC AND SLIGHTLY ARROGANT BUT MEANS WELL MAN HE IS. 

-Val being there as a cool as member of the team rather than just the love interest of Thor. Protect her at all cost even though she probs doesn’t even need it. 

-”I’VE BEEN FALLING FOR THIRTY MINUTES” 

-Stan Lee’s cameo as the dude who cut Thor’s hair. Thank you for doing all of us a giant favor. Please do the same to Loki. 

-loki beating someone up with his horn hat. 

-Loki twirling his horn hat. 

-Loki being such a self serving, extra asshole that he came from the fucking fog screaming “YOUR SAVIOR HAS ARRIVED” 

-Bruce asking where tony was and then complaining about his tight crotch pants. 

-LOKI’S COSTUME CHANGE GOD I HATED THE OLD ONES BLESS UP. 

-Loki’s costume being mainly blue, black, and gold :-)))))))

-Loki being 100% done with everything that happens. 

-Val knocking Loki out when he makes her relive her trauma why do people ship this you go honey that was a dick move

-Thor throwing various things at Loki to make sure he’s not a mirage. 

-he’s a friend from work, something a kid from make a wish that met chris suggested, being in the film and all of the trailers. I hope that made that kid smile. 

-”In return, i wish to be granted safe passage through the anus” 

-LOKI FINALLY ACCEPTING THAT HE DIDN’T WANT THE THRONE WITHOUT A FAMILY. THAT HE’D RATHER WATCH HIS BROTHER TAKE IT AND STILL HAVE A BROTHER THAN HAVE A THRONE WITH NO ONE TO SHARE IT WITH. 

-LOKI SHOWING UP ON SCREEN DURING THOR’S CORONATION. 

-Loki being genuinely worried about and double checking if Thor really wants to bring him back to earth after what he did kill me honestly that would probably hurt less. 

-Loki’s face when thor said that going their separate ways was what Loki always wanted bc in reality that is the opposite go back. 

-Hela not being Loki’s daughter because 1) it proves that ya’ll should stop hoping that a comic soap opera about rich petty alien boys with daddy issues would be anything like classic norse mythology, and 2) when the fuck and how the fuck and why the fuck 

-Loki suggesting that he and Thor both rule over Sakaar together lmao ouch. 

-Loki just being really cute and quirky. 

-Thor being so fucking amazed by Val all the time. 

-”You’re late.” 

-”I saw you coming” “course you did.” 

-THE GUNS NAMED DES AND TROY I WANTED TO FUCKING DIE. 

What i didn’t like much; 

-Hela. I loved her character, but honestly here is where i think there might’ve been some failure despite how much i loved that movie. She seemed so out of place as a villain, and i feel like the whole related shit tried to mimic Guardians vol. 2, but honestly the fact that Thor didn’t care much about her made her feel so out of place. But i did like some parts, like how she was so disappointed about not being remembered or what her existence and disappointment did to how loki was raised. 

-Dr. Strange? Ok that was weird. It makes sense and it was funny to see him but to be honest i wasn’t into it. 

-tHE SCENE WITH VAL AND A GIRL BEING CUT. WHYWHYWHY

-tbh was not fond of frost master, don’t hate me. 

-Loki possibly taking the tesseract????? And hinting that he might turn evil again??? don’t do this to me marvel. 

-loki possibly being turned into the quirky sidekick of his brother. Loki is Thor’s equal, not his annoying little brother/wacky sidekick. I didn’t get that vibe often, but sometimes i did honestly. 

-RIP thor’s hammer. 

-ODIN BEING A PIECE OF SHIT YET AGAIN. 

-Hela’s entrance. it was so quick and like out of place i was like what wait, Loki and thor didn’t even have time to prepare or even mourn. 

-the comedy. It was its best and worst part of the movie. Sometimes it was tasteful. Other times it was too much. Thor and Loki didn’t even get to mourn for their dad who tbh was an asshole but still their dad before there was a annoying joke about kneeling. It took away from the story sometimes.

-the lack of hugging between thor and loki.

-The way they glossed over the warriors three’s death like they weren’t Thor’s closest friends and the only ones there for him when Odin tried to banish Thor to earth :-))))) I mean after all that shit he went through I’m pretty fucking sure it probably hasn’t caught up to him but ya bitch still pissed. 

-The way, Thor, who basically admitted that Loki actually meant the world to him and was the only family he had left, didn’t ask where he was after asgard exploded? Like tbh i get it, he trusts Loki, his brothers capable and strong and most of all really fucking smart, but i’d still be like :-) the fuck is Loki. I think this is a directing error though rather than like the characters fucking up but i was freaking out, i mean asgard was literally pebbles and everyone was out BUT my son. 

-No sif, i mean i get it Jaime Alexander was busy but like y'all could’ve explained smh. 

-Loki not getting a hair cut. When will his emo phase end. 

-Not getting that one flashback to 80′s asgard with mullets and emo loki. 

Overall it was pretty fucking cool, one of the best movies of the trilogy. I fell in love with the marvel cinematic universe all over again. But it wasn’t perfect. 

[azrielsiphons]

LORD OF SHADOWS REACTION POST

I didn’t want to make an entire reading thread like I did with Lady Midnight (which was kind of popular for my typical stuff, I still don’t know why, it was just a lot of flailing) because LoS is still so fresh and I’m afraid to spoil anyone who might not have the tags blacklisted. So under the cut, IN ORDER AS I READ, is my genuine LoS reactions. Enjoy my flailing.

Kit you precious little bean don’t steal daggers you should know better

JACE IS HERE SHIT SHIT SHIT 

He just had to go and name drop Will in like the first five pages I am C R Y I N G 

Oh Julian is being ‘scrupulously polite and kind’ over you and Mark’s “relationship”? IS HE EMMA? IS HE REALLY?

Ew Mark kissing Emma’s cheek made me want to throw up blood too, Julian 

“Did he just kill Magnus?” I HOPE AND PRAY I NEVER SEE ANY VARIATION OF THAT SENTENCE EVER AGAIN  

Take a shot every time I think to myself “ugh, Perfect Diego”

FUCKING HELL PERFECT DIEGO AND CRISTINA ARE BACK TOGETHER DAMMIT CRISTINA

Awwwww Ty my precious son you’re so concerned for Kit

I love Mark so much my sweet faerie child 

UGH EMMA AND MARK KISSING GROSS MAKE IT STOP 

CLARY TURNED DOWN JACE’S PROPOSAL HAHAHAHA WHY AM I LAUGHING 

Cassandra Clare let me make something clear if you ever kill my daughter Clary Fray I will SET THIS WORLD ON FIRE 

so clary is having dreams of her and emma and cortana and she knows she’s gonna die uMMMMMMMM????? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK???? IF MY GIRL EMMA HAS TO KILL CLARY FOR WHATEVER REASON YALL CAN CATCH ME 6 FEET UNDER THE GROUND 

THAT’S RIGHT KIT YOU DEFEND TY BLACKTHORN 

Mark and Cristina Mark and Cristina Mark and Cristina MARK AND CRISTINA 

God bless America I forgot how much I adore Jace Herondale but then at the same time he makes me miss Will and when I miss Will I want to DIEEEEEEE

take a shot everytime someone says something to the effect of “we can’t involve the Clave”

lol jace “i’m just going to haul clary off to *wink wink* get chinese food *wink wink* be back in 20 *wink wink*” 

oh wait they actually just got chinese food wtf i need me a man like that 

MAGNUS AND ALEC ADOPTED A SECOND CHILD NAMED RAFAEL DONT MIND ME ILL JUST BE SOBBING INTO MY BEER FOR THE NEXT HOUR 

More of Ty and Livvy’s relationship pls i love sibling bonds 

WTF ZARA???? PERFECT DIEGO IS CANCELLED YET. AGAIN. 

“Smug bastard. Hair’s too good. I don’t trust people with hair that good.” KIT MY SON IM ADOPTING YOU IMMEDIATELY 

Julian slamming the door in Emma’s face made me slam MY face into a door

“She refused to hurry her steps — not for anyone.” Note to self: be more like Cristina 

okay real quick these centurions talking shit about my father magnus bane are about to find my six inch stilettos up their tight assholes bYE 

okay these nazi centurions are CANCELLED 

oh my gosh my smol son ty smiling at kit kill me NOW 

DONT WORRY JULIAN IM RUINED TOO LAFJLKAFJ;L; THAT KISS SCENE MY GODDDDDDD

wow who would have thought i would like gwyn damn (also gwyn x diana??? im??? here for it???)

THEY’RE GOING TO THE FAERIE COURT FUCK ME UPPPPPP

NO FUCK OFF ZARA YOU CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF 

wait but… but kit and ty… but he just kissed livvy and they’re cute too… gdi 

i hope emma and/or cristina rips zara’s head right from her shoulders 

JULIAN AND EMMA ARE KISSING AGAINNNNN

FUCK IT WASN’T REALLY HER

FUCK 

what 

w h a t

W H A T 

HER FATHER OH TKLEJFLMY GDO EM AM AY IT S YOUR DAD WFFJTF

jk it wasn’t her dad gdi 

Diana is my mother now since she just SHUT ZARA TF DOWN

MALCOLM???????????????

oh shit yall it’s the ‘oh no we have to share a bed’ trope and i am LIVING 

julian hiding his boner is my aesthetic 

emma you can’t just casually mention my father luke garroway wtf 

I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW ITTTT ANNABEL KILLED MALCOLM

what’s wrong with Cristina’s arm… wHAT’S WRONG WITH CRISTINA’S ARM LEAVE MY DAUGHTER ALONE 

Julian just snapped at Emma and I have never been more uncomfortable please stop fighting mom and dad 

“neither julian nor emma slept well that night, though each of them thought they were the only one troubled, and the other one was probably resting just fine” real quick i just need to go drink a gallon of bleach to get over this 

all these references to will and jem are really fucking me up 

GDI JESSAMINE 

WILL AND JEM’S HEIGHT MEASURING WALL IM SOBBING JUST LEAVE ME TO DIE

“Tessa used to come and ask me too. She wanted to know where Will was.” WHAT THE FUCK A LOT OF PAINFUL THINGS ARE HAPPENING ALL VERY QUICKLY 

“I want you to be proud of me.” SHIT FUCK HELL DAMN FUCK 

MARK AND THE GNOME IM CHOKING 

Real quick Bridget imma need you to stop alluding to jem and will and also tell me how TF YOU’RE ALIVE 

oooOOOOoooo a compartment to themselves??? HMMMMMM 

Mark x Kieran x Cristina did you mean Lito x Hernando x Daniella? 

ANNABEL GET AWAY FROM MY SON JULIAN 

KLDKFLAJFK;AFALKL MAGNUS SAVING MY CHILDREN AT THE SHADOW MARKET IM SO FUCKING ALIVE 

I love my father Magnus Bane 

I LOVE MY FATHER ALEC LIGHTWOOD 

Alec talking about Jace you bet your sweet ass I’m crying 

On a serious note — props to CC for this representation of autism through Ty, and how Kit treats him so damn well. Very, very cool.

GWYN AND DIANA ARE ADORABLE FIGHT ME I LOVE THEM 

My domestic fathers Magnus and Alec are saving my life 

BRIDGET WANTS THAT LIGHTWOOD DICK EVEN STILL 

All Magnus wants to do is adopt every sad downworlder alive and I LOVE HIM ALL THE MORE FOR IT 

EMMA AND JULIAN HOLDING EACH OTHER IN THEIR SLEEP BYE FOREVER 

Don’t worry Emma I too live on the Sexy Thoughts River and the Sea of Perversion 

EMMA WANTS A SELFIE WITH A PISKIE IM CHOKING I LOVE HER 

FUCK SHIT IT’S JAIME NO DRU RUN 

Mark just had a sex dream about Kieran in the library I’m laughing so hard 

OH KIERAN GAVE HIM THE SEX DREAM WOW KINKY I NEED ME A FREAK LIKE THAT 

Actually wait I change my mind fuck you Kieran that wasn’t cool of you 

THE PLATE OF SCONES IM CRYING I MISS YOU SOPHIE AND GIDEON 

NO SIR JAIME YOU STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER DRU YOU INSOLENT FUCKBOY 

DAMN can CC write so freaking well holy shit 

but are Cristina and Mark kissing because they love each other??? or because of the binding spell?????? will the world EVER KNOW????

POLYAMORY???? WHAT??????

Kit and Ty are … the … most adorable thing… in the whole world… 

“It's a burden being sarcastic” I’M CHOK ING TO DEATH 

FUCK YOU EREC FIRST YOU COME AFTER MY DAUGHTER CRISTINA NOW I FIND OUT YOU TORTURED MY SON KIERAN???

Jaime is evil I can smell it 

MOM AND DAD ARE FIGHTING MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOPPPPP 
Julian appearing out of nowhere sitting on a boulder in the pouring rain completely Unbothered™ like name a more iconic entrance 

DADDY JULIAN HAS EMERGED HOT DAMN SHOVE HER AGAINST THAT WALL DADDY FUCK HER REAL GOOD I need to chill i'm sorry 

BREAK MY HEART BREAK IT IN PIECES

Gdi Dru 

SLAP HIM CRISTINA YES MY QUEEN 

Wait... shit is Jaime actually a good guy? DAMMIT 

MAGNUS CAUGHT THEM LOLOLOL he isn't even concerned though bc he knows parabatai love each other extra hard bc he witnessed Will and Jem's love firsthand lol BYE 

Who tf is Ash? I mean he's Dru's age and they just had a "coincidental meeting" so CLEARLY he's a love interest but 

NO FUCK YOU JAIME I STILL DONT TRUST YOU 

DIANA IS TRANS WHAT IM SO HERE FOR THIS MY STRONG WARRIOR QUEEN 

Gwyn is the actual love of my life 

"Pyromania interests me" Ty, my son, I love you

Dad!Julian makes me WEEP

Coincidentally, Dad!Alec ALSO MAKES ME WEEP 

PRETENTIOUS HAIR PRINCE JENXKAOOAJW EMMA I FUCKING ADORE YOU 

MAGNUS NAME DROPPED MY MOTHER MAIA OMG 

Emma referring to implied polyamory as a sexy weirdness is ME 

Pffffffft Kieran calling Diego the "very handsome stupid one" is ALSO MEEEEEEE 

"The bad things can't matter more than the good things" Cristina....... my daughter........ 

Ty's letter GOODBYE ALL IM DONE 

HELEN OMGGGGGGGG

Kieran ain't got time for your SHIT Robert 

MAGNUS NOOOOOOOOOO

Sassy!Alec defending his man and not dealing with Bigot!Zara's bullshit I’m so wet 

OH MY GOD ROBERT 

NANSIZOANWPZOAPALWK THE MORTAL SWORD OMG 

what

what

what 

what 

what 

what. 

Livvy isn't dead

No 

No livvy isnt dead 

No no 

Wait what the FUCK 

THATS THE E N D ????

W H A T T H E F U C K 

BYE. 

BYE forever I'm going to go live in a world where Livvy is alive and well because fuck all this BYEEEEEEEEEE

so like 2019…. where u at