#Sorry got emo about Albert not feeling like he's enough

[races-stupid-cigar]

Albert whos overshadowed by his brothers

Ones stronger than a horse and works down at the docks he saved a kids life once and is incredibly good at what he does and knows it

The other works in construction helping build up the growing city it's a dangerous job but he's talented beyond his years and always can think up something to get the job done

His father works at a factory and has for some time he's not at the top but is well respecting in his efficiency even in his old age

Then there's Albert he's not his father or his brothers he's just the youngest DaSilva who tries to hide behind his insecurity with being defensive and downright an asshole sometimes because he doesn't feel like enough he's the weakest DaSilva and he knows he's not very smart and he can't even sell papers as good as his friends he's just some shitty kid who can't let go of his mom who's been gone for years now

[we-are-inevitable]

guys oh my GOD i just found my newsies rants from the first BIG night of my hyperfixation and. hng. there's so much good content in here

*messages copy and pasted under the cut!

NOTE: all of these messages are from April 19, 2020- the first day of my newsies hyperfixation!

listen racetrack and crutchie are some of my babes and i fucking love them

BEN TYLER COOK IS THE ONLY VALID RACETRACK AND I DESPERATELY NEED THEM TO REDO THE CAST ALBUM TO GIVE HIM THE SPOTLIGHT HE DESERVES

I CANT LISTEN TO KING OF NEW YORK ANYMORE BECAUSE. IT ISNT RACE. dont get me wrong racetrack from the soundtrack is like. really good but he ain't livesies racetrack good

also everyone ships race and spot which is valid but idk I just feel like race and albert have more in common?? like. spot is a great character and all of the Brooklyn Newsies deserve so much more screentime and so much more content but i just feel like the only reason people like race × spot is because of the Inner-Bourough Relations and the territorial stuff (bc the brooklyn bois are pretty spooky) but race × albert is so much cuter ?? like they're both Manhattan newsies and they share a lot more screentime and they have a lot more in common and like !! their interactions throughout King of New York makes me cry so hard i love them so much

something is telling me that if i dont learn All Of The Newsies by tomorrow i'm gonna scream

so i think later today i'm gonna rewatch livesies, then watch 92sies, then make myself a google slides presentation with a pic of each newsie and their name so i can figure this shit out

JACK AND CRUTCHIE ARE BROTHERS BUT WE STILL STAN THAT JACK/RACETRACK DYNAMIC

if anyone tries to tell me that racetrack ain't Jack's #2 Dude i WILL bite i dont care

like??? we literally see race kinda take charge after the bulls bust up their strike and jack fucks off to be Emo On The Rooftop (which is still valid and i love him for it) but race steps in and lifts everyone's spirits again and god i love him for it

it's real "Loving Racetrack Higgins Hours"

OH OH OKAY SO THE EMO ROOFTOP SCENE

LIKE. FUCK. people kinda got on Jack's case for leaving after the big fight breaks out and the bulls take Crutchie, but what else can he do? jack is 17. he's scared. he's dealing with his own trauma after what happened to him at The Refuge (which is never explicitly stated, but his reaction leads me to believe there was definitely some kind of ab•se (and its canon that the officers at the refuge don't feed the kids as they should)). he's seen as the tough guy, as the leader, as the father figure for all of the newsies, but he's a kid. he put his life on the line for them, but that's too much responsibility for a teenager.

jack got thrown in the refuge- a jail for kids- because he stole food and clothing for the other boys. he did everything he did for everyone else, without ever taking his own feelings into consideration; it was never a case of "what's in it for me?", it was always "will this help the guys i love?" and that is Jack's biggest quality i think.

anyway- so, he disappears after the fight because he's guilty. he watch his best friend- no, his brother- get taken by the bulls and watched the others he loves get hurt, and he couldn't stop it. again, this is a 17 year old we're talking about. his whole Santa Fe scene is the most pivotal part of the show in my opinion? like- we see Jack having a breakdown, essentially. "just be real is all i'm askin', not some paintin' in my head" is such a painful line because he's holding onto the hope that somewhere he's never seen is good enough to risk leaving his life behind for, and we see the struggles between wanting to stay and help his friends and wanting to get out and live and be able to have a life where he doesn't have to live with such a huge responsibility on his shoulders.

ALSO THE WHOLE THING WITH THE GUYS THINKING JACK IS A SELLOUT BECAUSE HE GOT MONEY FOR TRYING TO CONVINCE THE NEWSIES NOT TO CONTINUE THE STRIKE HURTS MY HEART

like Pulitzer basically said "if you don't tell them to stop this, i'll personally make sure all of them end up in the refuge" and even used Davey as a plot device, since Davey is one of the few that has folks and a little brother, and Pulitzer essentially said "you wouldn't want your pal Davey getting separated from his family, would you?"

Jack believed in the Strike, and he believed in the Newsies, but he couldn't handle the risk of more of his family getting beaten and thrown into The Refuge, and it kills me to see that he couldn't tell the others why he suddenly had a "change of heart", and that they all think that jw just gave up on them until they realize later on that Pulitzer manipulated him right where it hurt most

I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS ABOUT NEWSIES AND NO ONE TO TALK ABOUT IT WITH SO UH,, IM SORRY YOU GUYS GET THE SHORT END OF THE STICK

listen i could write an entire essay over Santa Fe and i love that song and it's just such an iconic "I Want" song and !!! fuck !!!!!! it's so sad but it bops!!!!!

"folks are fightin, bleedin, fallin, thanks to good old Captain Jack! Captain Jack just wants to close his eyes and GO"

and then theres a really long pause and his voice cracks and the next line just ?? hurts me ??

"let me go, far away, somewhere they won't never find me, and tomorrow won't remind me of today"

HE'S SO SAD AND STRESSED AND HURT AND GUILTY AND JUST WANTS TO LEAVE THE SITUATION TO PREVENT ANYMORE BAD THINFS FROM HAPPENING ADN I JUST WISH I COULD HUG HIM

i just realized ive been ranting for 30 minutes i love u all goodnight

[skyler10fic]

AoS rewatch s4

I'm not reblogging this whole emo season but I'm at the Framework and

WHAT IF it had been Lincoln?

Also the regrets:

We know Coulson's is that he joined Shield, so he became a history teacher. Aida's is that Fitz didn't love her like he loves Jemma. Fitz's is never reaching the potential that would have impressed his father. May's is killing the girl, who living in this Framework to give Hydra a platform. An incident. But are we to assume that Jemma and Daisy didn't get their regrets erased?

Also I thought by "we've identified our avatars" they would have gone in with a little more info, but I guess she just meant the code.

I do giggle at how much "Skye" hates her life. Excellent.

The no smartphones, only

The hula girl! Jemma's desperation is so brilliant. "You're not even real, you rogue piece of code!" haha

Poor Coulson's brain, having been rewritten so often is probably exhausting. But when he recognizes Daisy!!

The blue mind-control soap!

"You're the Hope that he lost" *weeping (And yes, I love her being called Skye again, not sorry. haha)

"What is it with that guy Ward? Every time I see him, I get this weird itch, like hives" ha! The writing on this show!!

Ok so later Aida's offer to Daisy to bring back Lincoln tells me she didn't program in Daisy's regret since she hadn't mapped Daisy's brain. And we can assume the same for Jemma.

I do feel for Jemma having to hang out with and work with Ward though.

Triiiip! <3

Sad about Mace but it's a good ending for his character, dying as a superhero, something he longed to be in life.

May breaking the terrigen to power up Daisy/Skye! I love that she got to experience it with (the last shreds of) hope instead of confusion this time.

I love watching her explode with her powers :D And May and her working together!

May the warrior, Mack the protector, Fitz the romantic... and Daisy the Quake. :)

Just remember to always destroy the body. It is not enough to blast your enemy out of a skyscraper.

"A hangover made of bees" or just Daisy's common sense being better than Jemma's, probably wise to not explain the Framework to May before meeting the Resistance. haha

It blows my mind that Father Fitz isn't Brendan Coyle from Downton Abbey, but David O'Hara (Albert Runcorn from Harry Potter, when they infiltrate the Ministry of Magic with the polyjuice potion).

I love Coulson stepping up and taking his place. Daisy's so proud. :)

The thing I hate most watching this is how long it takes Fitz to not be consumed by this after they are out.

Mack giving Daisy the idea to quake the Backdoor open like Moses in the Red Sea. lol

GO GO GO Y'all, Daisy's not an unlimited resource! It's a "leap of faith type of thing." Just follow his lead, May! And she will, because she loves hiiiim.

Radcliffe almost redeems himself by throwing Evil!Fitz into a pit, which isn't a sentence you can say every day.

Mack is gonna end up nearly getting everyone killed by not letting go of his grief! You do not have time for this!

WandaVision fans need to watch this to understand why AoS fans tell ghost stories about the Darkhold around the campfire, and it's not just a spellbook for witches.

[the-jennnster]

I don’t put down books often

I’m the kind of reader who sits down to really read a book, who will gobble up a good novel in one sitting, who has to be told to stop reading.

But today I started Bill Konigsberg’s The Music of What Happens, and I think that changed.

I met Bill, actually. He came a local literary festival and, because not many people showed up, we actually got to have a discussion about his work. He was funny, insightful, and had great stories. He was legitimately curious about our thoughts as readers, on both this book and his past works, and he seemed to really love being up there and talking to the maybe seven people in the audience.

I’ll admit, I’ve never read anything of his before. I remember seeing Openly Straight in my school library as a kid, never realizing what it was, but after falling in love with books like Simon vs The Homo Sapiens Agenda and What If It’s Us (both by Becky Albertalli, with Adam Silvera working with her on the latter), I thought The Music of What Happens would be similar and just as enjoyable.

I started it today, at about ten o’ clock. I finished one of my exams super early, and pulled out a book to read while I waited for my classmates to finish (it was a small class, and there was the promise of a round of Cards Against Humanity with six other animation students with anime obsessions and dirty humor).

I immediately loved Jordan. He reminded me of myself in a lot of ways.

Quiet unless he’s with his friends, a writer nervous but still eager to share his works with people he cares about, just enough emo to garner jokes about his darkly-colored wardrobe, enough acne and self-esteem issues to be trapped in endless daydreams of finding someone but knowing he stands no chance.

I got absorbed into the story, enjoying the goofy antics of Max and Jordan as they tried (and often failed) to make an old food truck into a culinary masterpiece, learning more and more about each other, running off to have little adventures, and just generally being goofy kids.

The major conflicts of the book, however, don’t stem from the food truck itself (though it most certainly is a conflict).

[Spoilers below the cut.]

Max is struggling to deal with the aftermath of what he’s slowly realizing was his own rape (he’d initially thought he’d just had a really shitty first time, which... he had, but it’s so much more than that) and Jordan is trying to take care of his mother and keep their house, which they’re about $5,000 behind on.

I’m about three hundred pages in, not quite finished, maybe a hundred out from the end.

Up until this point, Jordan and his mother have had a decent relationship. It’s far from perfect, as they’re both still dealing with the aftershocks of his father’s death four years prior, but it’s alright. She’s loving, she’s very alright with his being gay, and, aside from a few moments here and there where she leaves him to his own devices (which, you may be arguing, he’s almost a senior, he doesn’t need constant adult supervision, but... well, we’ll get to that), she’s there for him.

She did have a gambling problem, his friends do make some jokes about his mom being a little crazy, and Jordan and Max’s “meet cute” was thanks to the fact that Jordan’s mom had a bit of a meltdown at the farmer’s market and impulsively offered Max a job (as she felt like she couldn’t handle it), but overall it’s fine. They have a good relationship for a mother-and-son, especially with all the possible issues that could arise out of the things they’ve gone through.

But there is one little thing that caught my attention, a red flag, if you will.

At one point, Max points out that Jordan’s mother often treats him as if he’s the adult, as Jordan is the one responsible for making money, buying groceries, and ensuring bills get paid (after his mother let the mortgage go for several months). Jordan brushes it off by saying “I’m sure everybody’s relationship with their mom looks weird from the outside.”

That made my stomach pitch, just a little. Reading that interaction, having that pointed out. It was familiar to me, a conversation I’d recognized not from one I’d had with others, but from one I’d had in my head time and time again.

I kept reading, certain that it would just be nothing. As Jordan said, people have different relationships with their moms.

And then he went grocery shopping. Shit had been going down with the food truck, he and Max were in a bit of trouble, and Jordan just decided “fuck it, I’m going to get some healthy food because Mom said she wanted to turn her life around and get healthier”. He got home, and his mom immediately brushed it off. She dismissed his trying to help her, and when he tried to argue, she snapped.

She never hit him. She never threw anything, or threatened him, or even said she hated him.

In fact, this was the scene:

She takes a bite of her Twinkie, and a twinge of something goes through my chest. “That crap will kill you,” I say.

She exaggeratedly lies back and rolls her eyes back into her head like she’s becoming a corpse. “Well hurry up Twinkie,” she says.

“Mom,” I say. “That’s so not funny.”

“Oh my God!” she shouts and I am stunned frozen. “I get it! You’re perfect. I’m a total fuckup. I am so far below acceptable and there’s zero chance that will ever chance. I get it, okay?”

The energy in the room shifts, lightning fast. Dorcas barks and scurries out the dog door, like she feels it. I stare at my mom with my mouth open. Words do not come out. I don’t even have a coherent thought of how to respond to that.

She sighs dramatically. Herstrionically. “Forget it,” she says. “Forget I said anything. I’m not me, okay? I’m not myself. I don’t remember the last fuckin’ time I was myself but it was no time in recent history.”

She closes her eyes, throws the remaining bites of her Twinkie down on the plate in front of her, and stands. “Excuse me. I just need to--” And she walks away toward her bedroom. Moments later, I hear her door close softly.

That is what made me put down my book.

In fact, typing that up, it was probably the first time I read the scene with a clear mind. Reading it initially, I likely only got so far as “I’m a total fuckup” before my mind went blank.

If I had been in Jordan’s shoes... I would’ve been holding back tears. I would’ve been gritting my teeth, grinding them to dust to keep myself from reacting. I would’ve felt sick to my stomach, with a massive knot coiling in my gut, stealing my appetite (actually, I do feel that). I would’ve felt as if the rug had been pulled out from under me, as if I’d been pushed from a cliff and was free-falling, landing in icy water, desperately trying to swim to the top (I know how to swim, but suddenly, I can’t remember, it’s too much, the water’s too cold, I can’t feel my hands, and it’s everywhere). My mind would’ve been racing a mile a minute, telling me to prepare for the worst, bracing me for sharp words or yelling. I would’ve flinched when she put the Twinkie down and flinched again when she closed the door. The sound of the dog’s nails scraping on hardwood would echo in my ears unbearably, my hands would be shaking for hours (they were). I would’ve gone to bed feeling like shit, feeling like it was my fault, blaming myself for the blow-up, telling myself to get myself together before she comes to apologize.

Because she always comes to apologize.

She comes to stroke tear-stained cheeks long after it’s over. She comes to crawl into your bed and whisper “I’m sorry, it’s my fault, I’m such a mess, I shouldn’t have done that” until the knot returns and your ears swim. She comes to say “If you had just done what I’d asked” and “I should be a harsher mother, I never follow through on consequences”.

She comes to remind you that, despite what she does, she can always do more.

And she never realizes a word of what she’s saying.

I read that part, and I went back to all the times my own mother has done the very same thing. I put down the book and pushed it away while my hands shook and my stomach roiled, waves crashing in my ears as I tried to block out the memories that purposefully faded each time the sun rose on a new day.

I left the book on a table behind me and went to a computer, playing mindless games from elementary school (she wasn’t like that then, she never yelled) until muscle memory and quick-fingered strategy ruled my mind, pushing it out.

I was still shaking when I got on the bus at one o’ clock, too sickened to get lunch before I left, only wishing to curl up against one of my best friends’ shoulder and ask her “You know how we were talking about too-real stories the other day?”

Because that’s what this was for me.

It was too real.

I’ve read my fair share of “too real” in the past, in fanfictions like “Dirty Laundry” or “my blood is upon me” that tackle the carefully barbed biphobia of family members who “love you despite what you are”.

But those I counted on. Those I planned on. Those I went into saying “I’m reading this to know I’m not alone, to know that there’s a way to live around it, to know that there’s a way to solve it.”

But this... Jordan and his mom... it side-swiped me.

I’ve been home nearly two hours now, and I still have yet to eat (actually, that’s a lie, I had a Klondike bar, because that’s how I cope) or continue the book thanks to the pit of anxiety in my stomach, because I was so surprised by the familiarity of that situation that it took me totally off-guard and threw me back into things I cared not to remember. 

I love this book. It’s amazingly well-written and tackles concepts besides “being gay”.

But please, I’m begging you.

Know what you’re getting into when you read it. Rape (never portrayed explicitly, though discussed) and a borderline-bipolar/abusive mother are at the forefront of this book’s story.

Don’t get side-swiped.

[jeontaeh]

TWENTY NINE²⁹

✫  ✬  ✭  ✬  ✫

Jungkook was in shambled.

"My body... is in agony."

"Lol."

"Did you just say 'lol' out loud?"

"And? Fight me."

"Jimin, refrain from the unnecessary aggression," Namjoon said, and then looked at Jungkook, who was lying on the medical clinic bed. "You alright, Kook? Sorry, Jin had to inject you... you didn't look too well."

Jungkook looked at Namjoon, and humphed, looking away. "Why do you care... Mr. Meanie pants... just go... be rude to me without acknowledging my feelings."

Namjoon sighed, and Jimin looked at Jungkook in an upset manner. "We're sorry, Kookie. We shouldn't have done that. Because you're always so lively we didn't think it was affecting you so much. Our bad." Namjoon said, and Jungkook looked up at the ceiling.

Jungkook hummed, and Namjoon and Jimin waited for a second, but then realized Jungkook wouldn't respond. "You feeling better?"

"Yes. I'm fine." Jungkook said, and Jimin and Namjoon nodded. "We'll leave you alone," Jimin said softly, and he and Namjoon walked out, closing the door behind them.

The moment they left, Jungkook cramped up, lifting his hands to look at them. His delicate fingers were turning silver from the tips. He didn't know what that meant, but he had a bad feeling. Also, they hurt like shit.

Jungkook didn't know what to do. A part of him wanted to leave, somehow. Never see any of their faces again. Never see Taehyung's stupid grey hair and grey eyes again. Never had to witness that ever again. A part of him wanted to never see the faces of the six boys ever fucking ag-

"Jungkook!" A voice came, and the medical room door burst open. "Banjo!" Jimin yelled, and then left.

Okay, what the fuck. Jungkook got up from the medical bed and rushed outside the spaceship to see a banjo in the arms of Jin, who was playing it.

"Country roads~" Jin sang, playing the banjo. "Take me home~"

"What the fuck is going on?" Jungkook asked in a small voice and saw Jin, Jimin, Yoongi, Hoseok, and Namjoon all standing around while Jin was playing a fucking banjo. Yoongi had a flute.

"We found instruments," Yoongi explained.

"From where?? This is an empty desert planet and you found instruments??" Jungkook asked, and then saw Hoseok with a drumstick in his hand and thought better not to question it.

"Where's Taehyung?" Jimin asked Namjoon.

"He's playing loud screamo music in his room. Go call him." Namjoon said, and Jungkook rolled his eyes.

"Let him suffer."

"No."

Jungkook groaned, and Jimin pursed his lips and then rushed to Taehyung's room. He heard loud emo screaming and a booming bass coming from Taehyung's room, and hesitated before opening the door.

When he did, he saw Taehyung on his bed face first, crying loudly. Full on sobbing. "Hey, man, you good?"

Taehyung's hand reached out and pressed something on the wall which stopped the music in an instant. Taehyung turned his head. "I'm great." He said, pretending to be fine.

"You were crying."

"No, I wasn't."

"You have tear stains on your cheeks."

"I blinked too much," Taehyung said quickly.

"No, Tae. You blank too many times." Jimin said, and Taehyung rubbed his face with his hands.

"Jimin, the past tense of blink is not blank."

"Blanked."

"No."

"Anyways come out, everyone's hanging out outside singing and stuff. It's really nice. We've got marshmallows and stuff... some hot chocolate, some rum. It's just a nice little time." Jimin said softly, and Taehyung stood up.

"That does sound nice," Taehyung mumbled, and then wiped his cheek and followed Jimin out of his room.

"There's a nice buzz in the air. The atmosphere is nice. Jungkook's better. Everyone is happy." Jimin said, and Taehyung followed him to the exit of the ship. "We love each other and live in peace and harmony and-" Jimin looked outside and screamed.

Everything was on fire. Jin was screaming, hitting a fire that shot out from the ground with his ablaze banjo. Yoongi jumped around because his feet burn, and Hoseok was pouring water onto a burning flame. Jungkook kicked Namjoon, whose leg was on fire.

"Oh my fucking god." Jimin let out, and Taehyung's eyes widened.

✭

Everyone was fine.

They were all sitting in the control room, Yoongi with bandages on the sole of his feet, Hoseok with a glass of water in his hand, Jin with the end piece of a banjo in his hand (the other one exploded), Jungkook with his hands covering his face, Taehyung looking into space, Jimin sitting there silent, and Namjoon with an ice pack on his leg.

"Hey so-" Jimin started, and everyone looked up dully. "What- um- what happened?"

"We died."

"Almost."

"We might as well have," Namjoon mumbled, and then looked outside the spaceship. "This planet is going to explode sooner than I thought. The core of the eart is overheated. Flames started to erupt. Jin's banjo caught on fire-"

"Let's just get out of here," Hoseok said. "We have fuel, right?"

"It's not enough, Hobi," Jimin said.

"We need more. We need to use Jungkook's idea but in a better way. We need to figure out a way to get all that fuel." Namjoon said.

"There's no way that can be possible without one of us going out there. And look, the planet is in flames. Like, literally. Everything is on fire." Jin said.

"We'll figure something out, Jin. We'll figure something out." Namjoon said softly, and everyone nodded, determination bubbling in the pits of their stomach.

✭

They figured nothing out.

It was bad. Namjoon was really going through it. It had been an hour of brainstorming, yet, nothing.

"We can send someone down there, Joon. We can find ways of doing it quickly and easily," Jin said.

"I don't want to risk it-"

"Well you'll have to. Because the engine room is burning up, and the last thing we need is for that to catch on fire. Someone pull the ship out of the planet, but laying close to it." Hoseok snapped.

"On it," Jimin said quickly, rushing to the control pad and pulled the lever.

"Look, Namjoon. With one of Hoseok's devices and with a lot of communication in between me or Jimin and the person, we can very easily get down there, get enough fuel up to the ship, and then get out of here." Yoongi said, and Namjoon sighed.

"Taehyung can do it." Jin pointed out, and everyone looked at Taehyung, who was sitting on the floor, in the corner of the room.

"What?" Taehyung said groggily, looked dull, eyebags underneath his eyes and hair falling on his face.

"We said you can execute this mission for us, and you look like a pile of shit. Jesus. You alright?" Jin asked, and Taehyung was about to speak, but got cut off.

"Why does Taehyung have to do it?" Jungkook snapped, and everyone turned their heads to face him. Jungkook was standing by the entrance, eyebrows furrowed.

"Because he's been trained to do these kinds of risk-bearing missions-" Namjoon started, and Jungkook huffed.

"So what? You think Taehyung knows everything because of some stupid classes he attended? You think Albert Einstein did what he did because he was smart??" Jungkook snapped, tough.

"Yeah man... that's like his whole thing... he's a genius..." Jimin said, now having successfully put the ship outside the planet.

"Shut it, shortcake. Don't try to fuck with me. Albert Einstein dropped out of school and created Apple."

"That's Steve Jobs- y'know what, I don't have time for this. Jimin, what's the fuel count?" Namjoon asked.

"Practically empty. We used up all of it just getting out of the planet, Joon. We need to do this mission." Jimin said, and everyone else nodded.

"Okay, fine. Jungkook, this isn't anything against you, but I just feel like Taehyung's more fit for-"

"You're wearing my t-shirt." Taehyung let out softly, looking at Jungkook with big eyes. Everyone got quiet.

Jungkook looked down at his shirt which said 'THE FUTURE IS FEMALE' on it, y'know, from that planet. Jungkook looked at Taehyung wearily.

"I-I didn't know it was yours." Jungkook mumbled, and Taehyung looked up at him with gleaming eyes, still sitting on the floor.

"Hey, Tae? Wanna have a quick chat?" Yoongi asked, and Taehyung continued looking at Jungkook with wide eyes. So Yoongi walked up to Taehyung and pulled him off the floor, grabbing him and dragging him out of the control room.

Yoongi pushed Taehyung into his room and then walked in himself, closing the door behind him. "Okay, what's going on? You look like you haven't slept a wink all night."

"I haven't..." Taehyung said faintly, and Yoongi sighed and grabbed a mug from his desk and gave it to Taehyung. "Have my coffee."

Taehyung looked at his mug. "J-Jungkook used to have coffee..." Taehyung let out, and then Yoongi saw tears in his eyes.

"Jesus, Tae, what's gotten into you?" Yoongi asked, and Taehyung sniffled.

"I don't know! Stop being mean to me!" Taehyung let out and then covered his face with his hand, crying into it.

"It's fine. Look, you're big, so it's awkward for me to hug you-"

"J-Jungkook used to call me b-big," Taehyung let out through his tears, and Yoongi groaned.

"Stay here. I'll be back in a sec." Yoongi said, patting his head. He walked out of his room, closing the door behind him.

Yoongi rushed to the control room, where he saw Namjoon stress talking with Jin and Hoseok, while Jimin talked to Jungkook. "Dude, Martin Freeman is the guy who played the hobbit from The Hobbit. He's not the guy who invented the light bulb." Jimin explained while Jungkook looked more confused.

"Jungkook. Here. Now." Yoongi snapped, and Jungkook looked at him in confusion and walked over to him. "And Jimin you too," Yoongi said, and Jimin followed. Both walked up to Yoongi.

"Jungkook, go into my room. Talk to Taehyung and figure out which one of you is going down there for the mission. Jimin, can you massage my feet?"

"Um. Okay. But I don't wanna see his face." Jungkook said, and then walked to Yoongi's room, while Jimin groaned.

"Seriously? Fine, but only because you burned them." Jimin mumbled.

Jungkook walked into Yoongi's room and heard loud My Chemical Romance playing while Taehyung cried.

"Why do you keep playing loud screamo music, we all know you're crying," Jungkook said, and the music stopped, and Taehyung cleared his through.

"I'm not crying."

"I heard you," Jungkook said, and walked up to the bed, where Taehyung was sitting.

"Well get your ears checked, because I'm as dry as sand," Taehyung grumbled.

"Yeah, if sand was thrown into the ocean! Now I didn't want to talk to you, but Yoongi wanted us to discuss-" Jungkook started, but then Taehyung got up and walked closer to Jungkook.

"What?" Jungkook asked, and Taehyung reached for his waist. Jungkook's breath hitched, but just the simple gesture made Jungkook's aching pain in his hands go away.

"You touching me makes my pain go away." Jungkook said softly, and Taehyung looked at him, moving closer until Jungkook's back was against the wall.

"Jungkook," Taehyung let out, and then let his lips trace over Jungkook's cheekbone. "I-I think I love you-"

Jungkook pushed Taehyung away. "No, no you don't."

"Kookie, listen to me, I-"

"If you loved me, you wouldn't keep those things from me. You wouldn't told me. So stop bullshitting. You're just saying this shit because me giving in makes you hurt less. Don't lie to me." Jungkook snapped.

Taehyung stepped back from him. "I'm not lying, I-"

"Oh, so you love me? You really love me?" Jungkook asked, tone dripping with cynicism.

Taehyung hesitated. "Y-yes, I-I think-"

"If you love me so much, then back off and let me take this mission. Let me show all of you that I'm worth something." Jungkook gritted his teeth, and Taehyung took a deep breath.

"Jungkook you can't. I-I'm scared you'll get hurt, I don't want to take the chance."

"It's not your decision," Jungkook said, and then turned around to walk out of the door. Taehyung followed behind him, feeling a surge of anger.

As they walked out, they heard a few words.

"You have long feet."

"Thank you. Please do not lick them."

"Why the fuck would I lick your-"

"You know what, Jungkook? The only reason I'm saying any of this is to protect you! Because I care about you!" Taehyung shouted, and Jimin and Yoongi turned their heads to the side. Jimin was massaging Yoongi's feet.

"I didn't ask for your protection, nor your care. If you really wanted to protect me-"

"I know, I know, god, I fucking get it! I should've told you earlier! I made a mistake, I'm sorry. You've made plenty of mistakes, Jungkook, but you don't see us bringing them up all the goddamn time." Taehyung snapped and saw Hoseok, Jin, and Namjoon walk out the control room to see what the commotion was about.

"My mistakes didn't threaten your life-"

"Oh really? Because I've known since the first fucking day that you -- you were the one who pushed the fucking button and got us stranded in the middle of space! So whose fault is it that we're here, Jeon? Whose fucking fault is it?!" Taehyung shouted loudly, vein popping in his neck, skin red and irritated from the anger building inside of him.

Taehyung took a deep breath, and the boys looked at Jungkook, whose eyes were widened.

"Jungkook, is- is that true?" Namjoon asked, and Jin gulped because he knew.

Jungkook let out an exasperated sigh and saw Jimin stand up, raising his eyebrow. "Why didn't you tell us this from the start? We-"

"Because I didn't want you guys to get mad at me!" Jungkook cried, and then looked at Taehyung, tears in his eyes. "You just love hurting me, don't you??" Jungkook let out weakly, and Taehyung's breath hitched.

"Jungkook-" Taehyung started, and Jungkook sniffed, looking at the boys.

"I messed up. I pushed the button. I let the only form of communication get stolen. I did everything! So- so please, just p-please let me be the one who does this mission. I'll d-do it well." Jungkook said strongly.

"Jungkook that can be dangerous for you.. knowing the circumstances," Jin said softly, and Jungkook looked at him.

"I know. But if I do get hurt, at least it won't be at the hands of him!" Jungkook snapped, pointing at Taehyung, and then turning to the side and storming into his room, slamming the door shut.

The boys looked at Taehyung, who looked down, weakened by words. "I-it's fine," Taehyung mumbled. "I'm not in the right state of mind anyway."

"Well we-we can't let him go ahead with this, can we? Taehyung, you're way better suited. Plus, Jungkook's already weak as is with how sick he's been for the past weeks, we can't weaken him further-" Jimin said, and Yoongi cleared his throat.

"Actually, I think Jungkook should do it. He's got the will to do it properly. Plus, Taehyung truly isn't in the right place right now. Let's not doubt Jungkook." Yoongi said.

"As you say, Yoongi," Namjoon said, sighing to himself. "I just wish there weren't so many problems."

"I know. But I'm sure everything will be fine." Jin said, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Jungkook was in his room, sitting on the floor, the silver from his fingertips now covering his hands and wrists completely. His neck turned silvery and lips too. He looked at himself in the mirror and felt a terrible pain in his heart that just couldn't go away.

Jungkook balled his hands into fists. He couldn't let this affect him. Achingly, he stood up, his breathing quick as he did. He had to do this mission successfully, and he would do whatever it took to get it done.

Whatever it took.

✫  ✬  ✭  ✬  ✫

https://jeontaeh.tumblr.com/post/647229517813923840/thirty%C2%B3%E2%81%B0

[rimalupin]

Headcanon: Suitors’ Rapping Styles

Because I’ve been listening to a lot of rap music recently (Sorry if y’all don’t understand my rambling about rapping, LOL. :P).

Alyn Crawford - The Storyteller: 

Stage Name: Captain Badass

Pretty good at freestyling: Alyn can definitely beat his fellow knights at rap battles (he used to practice with Leo when they were kids). 

When he raps, he has to tell some kind of story. Otherwise, he’ll get lost if he doesn’t know what he’s rapping about. He feels like it’s the most effective way to put some meaning into his rhymes. 

He likes to use movements/hand gestures to emphasize his lyrics. 

EXAMPLE: “As a knight of Wysteria I vow to serve the crown / Mess with my country and I will shoot you down.” *”shoots” audience with his finger guns*

Louis Howard - The Genius Lyricist: 

Stage Name: Ice Rhymes (Geddit? B/c he’s the “Ice Prince”? ((Hey, I didn’t say their rapper names were gonna be good, okay? :P)))

Louis picked up some rapping skills from Sid when they were younger (Louis probably overheard Sid one day, which then led to impromptu rap sessions during their free time.).

Louis hardly freestyles anymore because he’s worried that he’ll say something dumb, even though he’s actually really good at freestyle rapping. 

He prefers to think about his rhymes beforehand. Once he comes up with something good, he writes the lyrics down, finds a good beat/backing track, polishes up his song, and then memorizes the rap in case he needs to share it with his buddies in the future.

He probably practices in front of Lucia TBH.

EXAMPLE: “I’m ignoring all the haters: all their faces and their words / Cuz once the ice starts breaking they’ll see how much it hurts…. Oh wait, that was good. I need to write that down.”

Leo Crawford - The Linguist:

Stage Name: Double Entendre

One of the best freestylers of this list (Maybe freestyle rapping runs through the Crawford family? Lol, idk: I’m just putting some things out there. 😂). Leo’s a fast thinker, so he can come up with lyrics in less than a nanosecond.

He also loves playing with the words he uses - he’ll experiment with close-rhymes, monosyllabic & polysyllabic words, and even words from other languages.

He’s such a show-off, but that’s what makes him awesome at rapping: he’s not afraid to show his confidence. 😄

Also, Leo’s a witty and sassy little firecracker, so he’s got a few diss tracks up his arsenal (he won’t roast you too hard though, I promise).

EXAMPLE: “I’ve been learnin’ and searchin’ about why you’re standing there lurkin’ / Why don’t you come a little closer? I won’t bite ya, good lookin’.”

(Did I mention that his flirtatiousness skyrockets when he raps? 😂❤)

Also, Sebastian can now rap thanks to Leo.

Giles Christophe - Emotional Rapper:

Stage Name: Cat Daddy (LOL, LIKE THE DANCE MOVE. 😂)

Giles can freestyle if he’s in the mood for it (or if he’s got time for it), but he usually prefers to write down his rhymes.

He’s kind of like Alyn when it comes to rapping: Giles often tells stories through his raps, and they always end up being so emotional (His raps often get pretty deep.).

He can change the moods/tones between his rhymes very smoothly through both his rapping and the lyrics themselves. His audience is always moved somehow by his performances, so I promise that HE WILL MAKE YOU FEEL THINGS if you ever listen to him rap.

EXAMPLE: “Helpless and hopeless are the voices in my head / As darkness consumes my reality in bed.” (Shooot, this got super-emo real quick. Whoops. :b)

Sid Arnault/Lloyd Grandier - A Freaking Legend:

Stage Name: $iD (I’m not even sorry about this one: I can totally see Sid signing his name with a dollar sign instead of an “S.” 😂👌)

Name three or four of the best rappers you can think of. Now, imagine that they all had a baby (Hypothetically! :P): their child would be Sid. Honestly, this guy’s rapping skills are so good that he would probably have the honor to be considered as an equal among rap legends IRL.

Sid was basically born with the talent of rap (it’s a legit God-given talent), but he definitely honed his skills while traveling for his job. He especially learned from the best rappers while hanging out at different bars.

Sid will most definitely destroy his challengers in a rap battle (It happens like 99.9% of the time, so watch out!), but he can also sit down and write actual masterpieces.

There are no other words to describe Sid as a rapper except for this one: A-FREAKING-MAZING.

EXAMPLE: This was how Sid ended his first rap battle (Which he won.): “They call me S-I-D. Don’t you dare forget my name / I’m the dude who straight-up put all you f*ckers to shame.”

(Oh, did I mention that he almost never strays away from profanity? LOL, classic Sid~. 😂)

Nico Meier - The Disser:

Stage Name: MC Clutch

Nico is one of the best rappers on this list (I could see him as a really good improviser.). I also think he’s also one of the fastest.

He can make up silly/fun rhymes if he’s just jamming out with his buddies, but hoooo boy he can be brutal when it comes to rap battles.

Heck, anyone will REGRET challenging this guy to a rap battle because he will lay out ALL THE DISS TRACKS. I guarantee that HE WILL ROAST YOU LIKE A MARSHMALLOW UNTIL YOU BURN (he is the 0.01% that Sid has yet to beat, LOL).

Besides completely annihilating his challengers at rap battles, Nico can write pretty decent rhymes if you give him enough time (because I don’t think he has the patience for that kind of thing: he’d rather just spit out whatever comes to his mind at the moment).

EXAMPLE: “You’re in a pickle? You’re stumped! Let’s let everybody know / That your flow is as slow as your bank account’s growth.” (BTW this was an example of one of Nico’s “nicer” roasts. I promise it gets worse: it’s just that I couldn’t think of anything more savage to say at the moment. 😅😂)

Byron Wagner - The Inspirational Rapper:

Stage Name: Star Lord (jkjk). His rapper name would probably just be BYRON (Yes, with all the caps.) because honestly, his name’s already cool enough to be a stage name. 😊

Byron’s okay at freestyling, but he prefers to prepare his raps ahead of time.

He would rap as if he was giving an important speech to his people. I’m not saying that his lines are boring and monotonous: he actually finds ways to connect to his audience (He’s basically the motivational speaker among the other rappers in this list.).

He also isn’t afraid to rap about touchy or controversial subjects, especially when they are relevant to whatever’s going on in his kingdom or in the world.

EXAMPLE: “Though tragedies like war and famine may never end / We must join hand-in-hand to keep the peace and make amends.” (Aaand this sounds like the conclusion to a Shakespearean tragedy. Whoops x2. xD)

Albert Burckhardt - The Rhymer:

Stage Name: Al the Poet

For a guy that loses his glasses quite often, he sure doesn’t lose his flow (LOL sorry, Al. 😂)! Albert’s actually pretty talented when it comes to freestyle rapping.

He’s really good at rhyming, but not just at the ends of his bars. Oh noooo, this guy can find rhymes almost ANYWHERE in his raps.

He really only stops freestyling when he thinks his raps get a little… umm… “out of hand” (Which is why he’d rather write down his lyrics than embarrass himself in a rap battle. 😅😂).

EXAMPLE: Al: “You know I’m gettin’ down to business when I put on my glasses / All these ladies are so fine, so I’ll compliment their - *record scratch*” Nico: “Ooo, Al was about to say something dirty~.” Al: *blushes madly* “No I wasn’t, you brat.” Nico: “Oh yeah? What were you gonna say?” Al: “… classiness.” *brusquely walks away* *locks himself in his room for three hours* 😅

Robert Branche - The Innovator:

Stage Name: DJ Robert

Robert treats rap music as an art: he’s the kind of person that acknowledges the genre as poetry.

Like Louis, Robert is a master lyricist. However, Robert’s raps are intriguing and unique, mostly because he ignores the “conventions” of rap. Like he doesn’t mind if a few words don’t rhyme or if the rhythm isn’t consistent throughout his song. Some people call it strange, other call it new and different, Robert calls it art.

Along with surprising his audience with his unique lyrics, Robert’s known for making (somewhat subtle) references towards his own life as a way to get his listeners emotionally invested into his songs (Yup. Robert’s an emotional rapper too.).

EXAMPLE: “The ruler of a country that doesn’t exist / Was a boy; was a son; was a king that won’t be missed.”

And here’s something a little extra for y’all:

The Princess of Wysteria - RAP GODDESS:

Stage Name: Queenie

There’s a reason she has that stage name…

And that is because….

SHE IS THE BEST RAPPER ON THIS LIST.

NOBODY CAN BEAT HER. NOPE.

TOO GOOD. TOO TALENTED.

MOVE ASIDE, BOYS: THE QUEEN IS HERE.

EXAMPLE: “Princess today, queen tomorrow. / Not even one of you fellows can suppress my flow.”

(Lmao, I couldn’t help myself, okay? 😂)