#Something about him saying if it's really serious we facetime and he's always on FT with Eddie

[sloasis]

Eddie said I'm only a facetime away and Buck took that as a goddamn promise

[maizumis]

Bestie😩✌️can you do a part 2 of where their child gets a Valentine but with Osamu, Yaku, Suna, Shirabu and u can choose the other one I don't mind😙tyty and take ur time🤠✌️

— HAIKYUU BOYS WHEN THEIR DAUGHTER RECIEVES A VALENTINE LETTER PT.2

ft. timeskip! osamu miya, yaku morisuke, suna rintaro, shirabu kenjiro, iwaizumi hajime

note: female reader❗plsss ofc I can bestie! shirabu was a challenge, yaku too 😭😭 I hope you like it!

part 1

•OSAMU was at the kitchen of Onigiri Miya when the door flew open and saw you and his lovely daughter in your arms "look a ma pretty girl! ya wanna have lunch here today bubbles?" the kid got quickly out of your arms to go hug her fathers leg "yeah daddy! wan’ sum yum’ ‘nigiri!" the smile on his face was full of love, he still can't believe what did he good to deserve the both of you "uh! daddy ya won't believe what happened to me today!" knowing what was going to happen, your hand went to your mouth to muffle your giggles "a boy, a pretty boy actually! gave me a letter and now he is my boyfriend!" the tall man stopped what he was doing, his attention fully in his daughter "no" the child confused "no?" "yeah, no boyfriend's for ya— actually we can go to another kinder right? new friends and stuff" as funny as the moment was, you needed to interrupt " ‘samu she's a child" his face dead serious, while chopping some vegetables "and a don't care— there's no way ma child gets a boyfriend, maybe when she's thirty"

•YAKU went to pick up his little girl after one week apart, he promised her over FaceTime that the exact moment he was back in Japan he would be with her "Sunshine! papa is here, I missed you so much!" he told her while bending over and opening his arms to receive her with a bug hug "papa! I missed you so much! I'm so happy to see you" picking her up with one arm while the other one was behind her neck to press her closer to his chest "me too darling, me too". little girl in his arms suddenly pops her head out of his chest ready to tell him what happened last week "papa! I got a valentine letter and a boyfriend when you were out!" he stops his way to the car, standing in the middle of the sidewalk with a fake smile and wide eyes "ahaha— very funny! you really got some jokes in there darling, so smart" she started signaling 'no' with her head "I'm not joking! look thru my bag and you gonna find the letter dad" he was spiraling to the car so he could see the damn letter, after his daughter was secured in the backseat and he was in the drivers seat, he in fact saw the little letter full of hearts and glitter "yeah— umh— no, we are gonna talk about this at home"

•SUNA had his daughter sitter on his lap, he was looking thru some sports clothes on his laptop while kids cartoon where on the TV "daddy?" "yeah?" "can I tell you something?" he raised a brow, eyes looking at her with a suspect expression "whatever you want, princess" she didn't say nothing, just got up from her seat went to the room and came with something behind her tiny hands "okay daddy, close your eyes" she carefully placed the letter on his hands "open them!" rintaro was so proud thinking his daughter made him a little draw of her perfect and loving family until he saw the initial of his daughter and other one with a plus between then, and a big read heart down it "what's this?" "is my promise letter! my husband made it for me and now we are married!" what are people teaching their kids this days? his girl was just his, a little more at least "nope, tell the boy the only man in your life is me" "but daddy! do you know how difficult a divorce could be?" he smirked before picking up her again and placing butterflies kisses all over her cheeks, little and high giggles all over the living room "I don't care angel, you're mine, only mine"

•SHIRABU was on his home-office when the little girl came running towards him with open arms "daddy! daddy! I missed you" he smiled a little before pulling back the chair so he could pick her up "I missed you too, darling. how was your day?" he finished the sentence with a peck on her forehead " ‘t was good, I got a valentine letter!" she got what? "I'm sorry darling I didn't quite hear you, what did you say?" the little girl sighed, knowing full well her dad listened to her the first time "I said, that I got a valentine letter and now I got a boyfriend" a boyfriend too? he didn't even date in highschool, he met you in college "did you know that Daddy doesn't let you have boyfriends? boys are smelly, I learned that in school" his child always, always, believed what he said, so she would dare to doubt his words "smelly!? I'm gonna break up with him tomorrow, after all I have you dad" his hands went to his girl hair, softly patting it before bringing her head to his chest "you're right darling, you have me"

•IWAIZUMI opened the door to find his precious girl sitting on the floor, drawing something in the coffee table while watching some tv, he carefully went behind her so he could have her a surprise hug "aaah! guess who got home!" he told there while tickling the sides of her body, little girl screaming his lungs out "dad! you scared me" he stopped, picking her up so he could give her a kiss "I'm expecting my welcome home kiss, missy—" his eyes caught the little drawing in the table looking at the barely well writing of 'i love you' "oooh angel, were you making me a letter?" she gaves him a confused look "nuh-uh daddy, that's for my boyfriend, he gave me one today so I want to give him too" he let her standing in the coffee table, looking amused by what she just said "and who gave you permission to have a boyfriend?" "do I need permission to have one?" hajime scoffed, of course, she actually needs permission to talk to a boy in fact, he is not gonna let anyone hurt his precious girl "yes and in fact, I'm gonna keep this draw for myself, I'm the only man in your life, the uncles too" now he had a single daughter and a beautiful draw, that wasn't meant for him, hanging in the fridge door

[eremiie]

gone for too long;

❥ in which you’ve been gone way too long for eren’s liking.

❥ 2.8k words | nsfw | modern au

❥ content: phone sex, dirty talk, mutual masturbation, i think that’s it

eren rolled over on his navy sheets. he was tired of switching back and forth between the same three apps, constantly checking for new notifications besides the ones from his group chat that kept blowing his phone up.

he missed his girlfriend. he missed your presence being next to him when he woke up and he missed cuddling into you on early mornings. the only company he had now was the dim light being let in through his sheer curtains.

he went to his camera roll and clicked on his photo album of you, scrolling through numerous times; like when the two of you had went to the movies together, he remembered the aftermath, the two of you getting riled up in a taxi and you forced him to tip the driver extra. he also remembered the plethora of dirty photos you'd send to him when he would ask, of course this wasn't a normal occurrence but definitely when the two of you were feeling it.

he contemplated calling your phone despite knowing you were away for a trip with some of your closest friends but he didn't want to bother you, yet his own issue was getting the best of him, the constant tossing and turning, the constant adjusting his sweats, and the constant aching pain he wanted to relieve so bad.

i mean, your contact was right there. he was scrolling through your messages a variety of text messages and share photos sent back and forth, the last time the two of you texted being the day you left for the trip and he wouldn't stop blowing your phone up with how much he missed you; the days after that he resorted to calling you instead.

maybe he should text you first?

okay, okay, he'll text you first, and if you're not busy then he'll call you; if you can't talk then he'll try to handle his own.

10:34pm

Baby you up?

yeah ofc, i’m on a trip

I miss you☹️

imyt bby, wyd?

No

Like i miss you

bye

eren chuckles at your response, a smile on his face forming at the response time of your texts.

10:37pm

Ok no fr, can we ft, wanna see your pretty face

u sure it’s just my pretty face you wanna see?

Nah

Now answer baby

eren couldn't help but smile to himself as he clicked your contact name, the facetime call ringing one, two, then three times before you picked up, your voice after so long sounding like a melody to his ears.

"hello?" your voice came through the line and from where you were sitting on the couch, pieck's legs sitting comfortably on your lap and the heads of sasha and historia whipping towards you, ymir not caring enough to look up from historia's phone.

"hey baby, how are you?" eren asked, his face not in the camera while his hand sliding left to right on his lower abdomen as he spoke to you.

your eyes flickered to your friends, a sly grin on historia's face at the sound of eren's low voice on the other end of the line.

you and your friends decided that it would be nice to go on a small trip, residing in an air bnb while you all traveled together. it was hard to convince eren to let you go, him saying that "he'll miss you," and "you'll be gone for too long", but when you told him you'd keep in contact with him everyday he reluctantly let you go, of course with a pout. you wouldn't be back for a couple more days as you had a couple more places to sightsee with the girls.

"i'm good, how are you?"

"i'm fine... i just miss you..." eren mumbled, adjusting himself in his position, bringing his hand up to his chest then back down to his stomach, feeling the ripples of his abs from under his palm.

sasha threw her head back and huffed a breath. "i wish connie call me like that!" she turned over to her stomach from on the couch and grabbed her phone, you, pieck and historia chuckling.

"i miss you too, i'll be back soon though."

"but baby soon is not soon enough, i want you here with me." he pouted, his hand smoothing down to his crotch while he stared at you, you looking down at the camera. "i want you beside me, 'm tired of going to sleep by myself."

you pressed the volume down on your phone a couple times. when pieck opened her eyes, her dark irises shifted towards you with a raise of her eyebrow. she could read your mind; her legs sliding off your lap more towards her body, and her eyes closing again. "go on." she smiled.

you shook your head after her trying to hide your mere embarrassment before getting up from the couch with a soft "eren!" to warn her that you were in front of your friends. "i'll be back guys..." you made your way towards the staircase of the rented house while eren continued to talk to you.

"what? i'm so serious babe. it's been so long, i just want to feel you against me." he whined. at some point his hand made its way into his sweatpants, him now palming himself over his black boxers. "where are you?"

you opened the door to the room you share with pieck and sasha, getting on your bed and turning over to face eren, half of his face finally in the camera. you could tell he hadn't woken up too long ago, almost all of his hair falling out of his ponytail, frizzy pieces framing his face and around his head like a halo, although it was kind of hard to see with how dark it was in his room. "well now i'm in the room i'm sleeping in... the owners had two rooms so i took one with pieck since she's pretty quiet, but since there isn't three rooms sasha sleeps here too, she didn't mind making a makeshift bed, plus the owners apologized. ymir forced us to all share a room anyways because she wanted the other room alone with historia."

"yeah? well it sounds like y'all are still having fun anyways since you haven't been calling me."

"eren, we just talked yesterday."

"yeah, because i called you. you didn't call me."

"same thing." you huffed, turning to your back and resting the bottom of the phone on your chest, an angle that made eren laugh. "what are you doing?" you asked him, while your eyes darted around the room to study it since you never really got a chance to, being out and about everyday you've been here.

"thinking about you."

you felt your cheeks heat up, and held back your smile, rolling your eyes instead. "hm, i told you i'm co—"

"thinking about how i want you next to me, so i can feel you against me."

"eren, stop," you moved your face out the camera, of course the butterflies in your stomach decided to start flapping around.

"i'm not kidding baby, i was just going through my photos, that's how much i miss you... and i saw some of the photos you used to send me... how come you don't send me nothing no more?" he taunted you, and you didn't even know his hands were halfway down his pants as he spoke to you so enticingly.

"you know why. how did armin end up seeing my nudes?" you furrowed your eyebrows and turned the phone back to your face with a jokingly angry expression causing eren to burst out laughing.

"i told you i was sorry, it was an accident! historia saw my dick print that one time."

"that's because you sent it to me when she was using my phone, nobody asked you to send those to me while i was out with my friends."

"you're always out with your friends and never with me."

"you're such a baby."

"but i'm your baby, and your baby wants you right now."

you were at lost for words, your voice croaking when you tried to come up with something to say, but eren didn't mind, after a moment of comfortable silence he continued to carry the conversation for you.

"wanna feel that pretty body, i wanna kiss you and hold you," a faint noise was eliciting from the other side of the line, small constant sounds of fabric being ruffled almost— and alongside it, eren's soft panting. "the things i want to do to you, baby... i wanna fuck you so bad right now."

eren's hand was wrapped around himself, stroking up and down in a rhythm that you could hear from where you were thanks to the facetime call you were on. "eren—"

"that's one reason i miss you so much... i been fucking my fist to that pretty face almost everyday..."

you turned over to your side letting the phone rest beside you as you listened to eren through the phone. "yeah?"

"yeah, 'm doing it right now, that's how much i miss that pretty pussy."

somehow you found your own hand trailing down to your underwear, pulling the fabric aside and basking in eren's deep voice and praise. you didn't even realize the soft moan you made until eren's voice came in on the other line.

"you're touching yourself too? touching yourself to me?"

his voice— it was so low and grumbly, just like he had only just woken up, the way he spoke working you up. "mhm," you responded, and when he didn’t continue you took his silence as a way of him telling you to 'proceed', letting your fingers brush over your clit.

"i bet you miss me just as much then... miss the way i bend you over..." eren groaned at his own words, his hand tightening around his cock. his sweatpants and boxer were shoved down around his thighs, only enough so that he would be able to pump himself while laying on his back. "miss the way i fuck you so nice, right?"

"yeah.." you mumbled, you didn't really want to be in the position you were when your friends were sitting just downstairs but you couldn't help it, eren just had a natural charm to him that had you doing whatever he wanted you to.

"fuck, baby, if you were here right now i'd have you screaming like you always do—" you let out a low whimper at the thought, he wasn't lying, he did usually have you screaming and crying during your sexual endeavors, he was just that good once the two of you had learned what each other liked and disliked. "bouncing on my dick like that... you wouldn't even be able to touch yourself like you are right now if i was there..." you clenched at this because once again, he was right, he loved edging you, it's was something about the way you would cry and beg for him to let you come that turned him on so much. "fuck, i miss you."

you let a finger enter into you, and you tried to hold back your moans, your mouth agape at the feelings and you could only imagine it was eren's fingers instead. "i, i miss you too." and the noises, the squelching noises just had to be transferred over the call as well, eren letting out a low chuckle when he heard them.

"you're dirty..." he laughed, thumb slipping over his tip to collect his precum and smooth it down his length. "if you're gonna finger yourself show me,"

you squeezed your legs around you and turned onto your back. "eren..."

"let me see."

he moved his face into the camera, head now against his headboard and him still pumping himself while he watched you adjust his view so that the camera was flipped. at first, it was quite shaky while you pulled off your own sweatpants and underwear, putting them off to the side and then making sure the camera wasn't too shaky for eren. "yeah, right there, now put them back inside, put on a show for me, ______."

he was doing something to you, and it wasn't fair. you slipped your fingers back inside of yourself as he asked and let out a drawled out moan, eren's mouth dropping open much like yours earlier, head tilting back against the headboard as he lifted his hips up to meet his hand. "fuck— you wish that was me fucking you instead?"

you let out another whimper, your eyebrows furrowing and your eyes closing at his words; you weren't even sure if the camera was positioned properly anymore but eren wasn't complaining so you could only assume so. "uh huh,"

"look, baby." you opened your eyes again and looked at the phone. the camera was no longer on eren's face, it was now on his dick, his hand wrapped tightly around it moving up and down slowly. "can you see it?" and you could, albeit the dimness of the room, there was just enough light to see his movements. "you want this inside you?"

you nodded your head only to realize he wouldn't be able to hear you and instead let out a small "yeah", adding another finger into yourself and biting your lip to keep from moaning out while watching eren get himself off at you doing the same, you completely dismissed the words 'eren jaeger💍 took a facetime photo.' when they popped up on your screen, you were to amped up, but you knew you'd be complaining later.

"god, you're so beautiful, i can't— 'mma come." he whined, hips once again jutting into his hand. he was getting sweaty, feeling how close he was, his skin shiny with a thin sheen of perspiration, hair tie touching his neck as his ponytail was almost completely loose. his eyebrows were knit together and his complexion was flushed, with the phone in front of him to give you a good view while he stared down at it to watch you. "i want you to come first, make yourself come first for me."

your eyes fluttered, and you used your thumb to rub your clit while you let your fingers glide in and out of you, the wet noises making eren jerk off faster, a choked noise leaving his throat as he tried to hold back. "c'mon baby, just act like that's me, that's me fucking you so well," and he didn't even have to go on, your orgasm washing over you at eren's words and the stimulation, your fingers pulling out of you and your knees coming together while your face twisted in pure pleasure, the sound of eren unfolding on the other line as well.

"______!" he moaned, letting his cum spill all over his hand, and oh, what a sight. "fuck... did you like that?"

you flipped the camera back, placing it on the bed and using your one hand that was holding the phone to pull both your underwear and sweatpants back on. "i guess," you murmured once you had your bottoms on again. "i'll be right back."

"yeah, me too."

both you and eren left to clean yourself up and wash your hands, you coming back to eren being back first. "so when are you coming back again?" he asks, now his face once again fully in the camera laying on his stomach, clutching his pillow.

you held back a small laugh at his boyish grin when he looked at you, clear content in his eyes, the light from the phone illuminating his features. "two more days, i'll see you soon, eren."

"that's too long. can we do this again if i start missing you again?"

"no, this was a one time thing, i'm hanging out with my friends!" eren pouted at you and squeezed his pillow a little more then leaning forward and kissing the phone making you grimace at him and start laughing. "you're so weird."

"shut up and go hang out with your friends."

you and eren finally hung up the phone after a mantra of 'i love you' from both ends, you finally heading back downstairs.

"well that took forever." historia said, her eyebrows raised at you when you strut back in the living room.

"yeah cause she was probably phone fucking her boyfriend." ymir joked, but it caught you off guard because, she wasn't wrong.

"i wasn't!" you retorted quicker than you meant to, historia and sasha laughing.

"i took a nap while you were up there... that’s how long you took! we have to get ready, we're leaving to go out to eat at four pm." pieck yawned, stretching out her arms and legs and moving them from where she stretched them into your previous spot.

"okay, well then i'm gonna go back upstairs to get ready." you replied, turning back around to head back upstairs.

"don't waste anymore of our time being on the phone with jaeger boy." ymir scoffed as she watched you go up the stairs, historia hitting her shoulder from beside her.

"i won't!" you smiled to yourself, as you made your trek back up the stair, of course you wouldn't take any longer than you needed to getting ready, but you definitely  wouldn't waste anytime getting back to eren once you made it back home.

[sportyclown]

how sawamura, miyuki, yuki, and kuramochi text (friends + s/os)

will most likely do a part 2 with more boys at a later date! these got freakishly long because i am, at my core, a very mad. also might revisit as i get re-familiar with the characters, i just had this idea floating around in my head. also the way these got pro

sawamura eijun

no matter who he texts, it’s always extremely extra. not only does he always give more information than you asked for – ex. if you text him wya? he will give you a play by play of his entire route or something

 he also uses tons of emoticons. and yes I do mean emoticons, baby boy has a flip phone. ifhe does eventually get a smart phone, then this boy overuses tf out of emojis. he’s the sort of person that sees someone use a combination of emojis he likes and then tries to copy them, but uses it completely incorrectly, but its v cute.

if you send him a meme, he will respond with an unnecessary amount of hahas. 

when he’s texting his lil bae, they’re always on his mind so he ofc texts them every thought that comes to his mind! when he sees something that reminds him of you, he won’t hesitate to share it with you. 

if you have been together for a long time, then we will definitely text you words of affirmation and be very honest/blunt about how he feels about you. he’s also always sure to ask you about your day - and he seriously cares. but i still i feel like with a s/o he would prefer facetime to texting just because he likes to see you :)

overall, a very adorable texter and his enthusiasm is just as contagious when texting as it is in person. he’s kind of clueless so he doesn’t pick up on subtext. so be blunt, just like he will be with you~

kuromochi youichi

my bias might be showing here, but I feel like he is one of the most well-adjusted boys in terms of being ready for a serious relationship tbh (at least post-high school). i mean we all saw that he regularly corresponded with wakana wish that were me lmao

i think he would most often use proper capitalization, but not to the point where he uses a period after every text

would send his friends news articles about his favorite fighting games where u like gaming or not

a meme fiend in general. the sort of person who uses reaction images of people he knows. (if you’re dating, he would still have a stash of funny pics/screenshots of you on ft, but he’d ofc only use them with you <3). his convos with his friends are rarely serious

 i don’t think he’d be the type to text haha out loud, but he does use LOL on occasion. with close friends/his lil bae he might send a voice memo of him laughing hysterically if you send him something REALLY funny. ugh my annoying king <3

unlike eijun he’s the king of being perceptive / picking up subtext. 

similarly, i do think he’s pretty reliable, but for friends i feel like he might make a lil bit of a stink lmao. like lets say a friend wants him to pick something up for them, he might play like he won’t do it then miraculously shows up with the requested item. its giving tsundere vibes on the low.

with his partner: i feel like he would use emojis when he’s trying to be ~cute~. i think with a established partner he’d be pretty flirty still but he’s v much whipped for his partner so its way more mushy than it would be early in the relationship.

yes your name has hearts/stars in his phone. mans is a SAP for you

his love language is more quality time imo, so I think he values time spent with you over texting time. so a lot of your texts might be asking you to come over to hang out / get a meal or vice versa

like eijun he wants to hear about YOU, and is very supportive and good at advice when he wants to be. he can be goofy but this is how he shows you he cares/sees you as more than a friend

he’s a blushy/shy boy with his s/o esp early in the relationship, so he might be hesitant or nervous to say “i love you” or anything like that outright, but you know anyway, which just makes the times when he does outright say it that much sweeter.

miyuki kazuya

i mean it goes without saying that this man is snarky. he’s not a meme king himself but he enjoys when people send them to him and will usually play off the meme to make his own jokes.

i feel like he also likes deep-fried memes or the very abstract, post-modern memes. miyuki is good at making other people laugh, but he has a generally very-off brand humor and the things that make him cackle hardest are either at someone else’s expense (very similar to kuramochi, so they bond a lot over that) or just indiscernible without access to a huge layer of context/background

saves the reaction photos kuramochi sends him, but doesn’t usually use them. but seeing an ugly pic of eijun yelling never fails to make him grin LMAO

i think he also texts A LOT about baseball, even more so than these other baseball dummies. texts his teammates a lot of articles he reads or clips from games/cool plays. this is mostly about texts, but in terms of social media I think miyuki uses twitter/instagram the most especially for baseball related reasons, while kuramochi uses snapchat the most. 

he probably texts a lot about baseball as well, both seriously and playfully

i can see him using hahas and LOLs in equal measure, but he would also utilize the haha reaction if he had an iphone. this boy does value his wit so he would definitely have commentary about any memes or jokes he’s sent

you won’t win a joke war against him, he will definitely one-up whatever you send him with either a one-liner or another joke. how tf does he do it?

definitely ignores people/conversations if he really wants to - but ofc he never does that to his BAE

if miyuki give you a dry one-line response...he’s not interested at all or he’s feeling frustrated about something else. but when he’s really happy? he will text his friends all the time and spam them! i see him as someone who enjoys texting when he has the attention span/state of mind for it. and when he’s texting his s/o his texting gets even more ~flavorful~

wit his lil bae: i don’t think miyuki would switch it up much w his s/o. is probably even more teasing with you over text than he is with his friends, which is saying something.

like talking with you just by nature of you being his partner. prob prefers texts to facetime because text kinda allows for maximum snark

he LIVES for you guys’ witty back and forth 

if he’s traveling for work or something, will definitely relish in you guys binge texting a tv show or something but just making funny commentary (or he’ll just send you funny commentary to get a reaction)

 he can dish it and he’s also not a super sensitive guy so he can take it tenfold from you as well. nothing y’all wouldn’t be used to when talking in person!

sometimes when texting him you’ll want to beat his a*s because he can be so cheeky but its endearing in a way. he definitely adds emojis to the end of his more annoying messages to give it that loveable vibe (and it works ofc, we love u miyuki)

he’s kinda clingy on the low so i think he’d prefer a partner that’s more open with their affection via text than he is. he would live for your random ilys or whatver throughout the day. also would not mind at all if you updated him on your actions throughout the day or sent him snaps - might not be able to respond to everything, but will react and appreciate it. very likely to make jokes about whatever you’re doing.

would also apologize over text. he’s not always used to apologizing can be awkward about it, so text makes it easier for him.

he would use emojis w you in a joking/ironic way. would absolute use those dumb but genius emoji combinations

yuki tetsuya

i’m literally cracking up thinking about texting him. he is one of my ultimate baes but im sorry i just know he texts dry asf. but its part of his charm!

has a flip phone. either never upgrades or gets the chunkiest most basic android if he is forced to

the thing is this man thinks that he is infusing all his texts with, like, tajin level seasoning, when in reality its pepper

uses punctuation. always. exclamation marks are used sparingly to express excitement.

but i can’t get the image out of my head of an upset tetsuya texting you a simple angry emoji (or the angry emoticon >:( LOL) if he’s reeeeeeally mad. but its v cute i can’t take him seriously. i just want to give him a hug <3

 but you know what he is so PASSIONATE about whatever he’s talking about that his passion bleeds into his text through sheer quantity of words and depth of thought. ultimately, all his conversations end up being extremely flavorful in terms of content. he is surprisingly good at having deep conversations over text.

he’s better at holding conversations with more extroverted personalities, truthfully.

he’s another one who sends random things to people when he thinks about them. miyuki of course gets so many texts/thoughts about shogi. if you get a random haiku, poem, or quote from testu, that means you’re blessed enough to be in his inner circle! he definitely thought of you when he read it and and wants you to respond!

with bae: he doesn’t really change up his texting style tbh, but he has a stronger outward reaction to what YOU text in response.

definitely the type to smile almost imperceptibly at his phone as he texts you, even if you send him something like “hey i’m at the store, want anything?”

he’s not great as verbal affection early in the relationship, so you’ll have to discern his love/affection. however baby boy is NOT afraid to just straight up say he loves you, he does it all the time and early.

he’s KNOWN for being reliable and responsible, so he will be at your beck and call when he’s able to for anything you need, but his heart is also warmed by the thought of you reciprocating that care. if your texts show him you’re thinking of him just like he does too. he’s very gentle and sweet, and checks up on you when he’s able to see if you need anything at all.

he might be reliable, but that doesn’t mean that he’s the quickest guy to respond to texts. he’s a busy guy, and he doesn’t think about his phone all the time, but he will always get back to you (bae does not play when it comes to completing things).

if they came up with a shogi game for gamepidgeon and tetsu had an iphone, your phone probably would be spammed with requests for games lol.

this is my first time doing headcanons like this so please let me know what you think or give me tips on how to improve! I really enjoying thinking about it so I hope to do more in the future <3

[changlix-mp4]

let’s play a game

pairing : bangchan x f.reader

genre : smut , fluff ig

warnings : teasing, teasing, use of pet names, making out, dry humping, marking, riding , unprotected sex, cum inside, cockwarming (yes again, cockwarming is kind of cute for me sorry sksldjk)

(+) ft. Changlix ♡ appearance uwu ,, ahah

words count : 2,6k

A/N : don't mind my mistakes please my eng still sucks ,, i still hope you guys will like this one ,even if I feel like every of my long fics are invisible help TT skkdjl , anyways thx for reading,, FEEDBACKS ARE VERY WELCOMED ♡

M RATED

After a long day of procrastination, you and your boyfriend!Chan, were sat onto the couch, a movie playing in the background, since both of you were on your phones. After awhile, Chan broke the silence “babe” , you hummed turning your head toward him. He looked down at you “we didn’t do anything today”, you sighed  “I know... It was such a boring day. We had to do the laundry, clean the house but the only thing we did was sitting there and eating” —  “ugh...we’ll do it tomorrow” Chan lazily replied. “We’re saying that since last week” you said looking at him both of you bursting in laughing “we’re so lazy” you exclaimed still laughing. “nah, you’re the lazy one here” he retracted. “What?! you’re always the one saying We wiLL dO iT tOmOrrOw” you imitated him. “Hey I don’t talk like that!” he said laughing. “no no really. You sound exactly like that” you smiled at him teasingly.

Chan suddenly smirked as you gave him a questioning look. He bent down a bit, his lips brushing against your ear, breath fanning over your neck, goosebumps raising on the delicate skin. “you want me to show you how you sound when you moan my name?” he whispered biting your earlobe softly. You gasped slapping his arm “shut up idiot”. He whined holding his arm playfully.

“So?” he asked throwing an arm over your shoulders  “what’d you like to do babygirl? . You laid your head on his shoulder. “I don’t know”. Chan thought for a moment  “hmm, what about we play a game?”. You raised your head “getting interesting” — “I was thinking about something...freaky”  — ”Chan! You-” — he hushed you before continuing “listen baby. Let’s do an arm wrestling”. You gave him a confused look, it was nothing freaky . What did he have in mind?  “The winner gets to do whatever he wants to the loser.” — “What? no!” — “Why not love?” — “are you kidding me? You’re one hundred percent stronger than me. I’m gonna lose for sure!” you whined. “ I’ll hold myself, I’ll be gently” he smirked. “That’s not funny” you pouted crossing your arms over your chest. “C’mon babygirl” he said putting his hand on your thigh stroking the soft skin.

Looking at his veiny hand going up and down, you got an idea. “ I have an idea” you said hesitantly. “But it’s kinda embarrassing” you admitted looking at your lap playing with your fingers. “Tell me babygirl, don’t be shy” he approached you lifting your face slowly. “ ‘k hm.. let’s make out-”  before you could finish your sentence, Chan interrupted you “Wait ,that’s not a game.. But y’know I’m down for it” you stopped him from hovering you “Chan, I’m not finished” you tsked “I don’t want to play anymore” he whined “shut up Chris” -- “ok M’am”  he sighted pouting. “arg don’t make that face. well , yea let’s do that but the first one making a noise loses , the winner then will do whatever he wants to the loser”. Chan smirked to himself  “your game is interresting , very interresting” you looked up at him shyly. Not lying to yourself, a part of you regretted this game, the other one was excited. “Let’s go!” you lowered your head not wanting him to see your timid face  “BABYGIRL IT’S TOO LATE TO BE SHY! NOW GET YOUR CUTE AND SEXY ASS HERE!!” Chan practically yelled. You chuckled still embarrassed but you took a deep breath and looked in his eyes “I can’t lose this” you announced determined  “I can’t either” he muttered. 

You sat comfortably on his lap.You watched him attentively waiting for whatever move he was gonna do. His hands found their places on your thighs and caressed them up and down. Wanting to tease a little bit,  you ghosted your lips over his beautilul plump ones . When he went to kiss you, you backed a little away as he chased after you “You’re so fucking sexy, y’know that babygirl?” you bent down kissing all along his jaw until you reached to his ear licking it slowly “Is that so?”. Chan wanted to groan but bite his lips instead. You kissed his neck , finding his sweet spot. He threw his head back as you sucked on the sensitive spot, his hands gripping tighter on your hips. You were driving him crazy. But he couldn’t show it. Getting impatient Chan decided to make a move. He took your face in his hands, looking at you with nothing but love and lust. He finally kissed you, one hand cupping your cheek, the other one on your hip. The make-out session was getting heated as you detached yourself from the kiss breathless.

“ I will admit that you’re really good at this game y/n” he admitted rubbing the small of your back “you’re giving me a hard time”. You smiled at him satisfied by his comment “But baby, that doesn’t mean I’ll give up. I can’t wait for you to lose” he whispered against your lips. “n-not gonna happen” you objected. He knew the effect he has on you. You suddenly started grinding on him knowing well he always gets hard when you do it. And damn you were right. Chan’s lips parted slightly, you were sure he was gonna groan or something but before he did , he let his head fall down on your shoulder and bite on the tender flesh.  Your eyes squeezed shut as you pulled on his hair. You were weak, Chan knew you’re slowly losing at your own game. Chan couldn’t hold back anymore as he finally decided to break you, he thrusted his hips into yours making you moan at the delicious friction of his jean on your slightly covered clit. Chan smirked wildly at you , poking the inside of his cheek with his tongue “ I won” -- “That’s unfair..” you trailed out. ”y’know , I really liked your little game,  It was somehow ...entertaining”. You lowered your head on his broad shoulder sighting. He stroked your hair with one hand, the other one playing with the hem of your -his- black oversized hoodie. “so?” you asked defeated, “well , since you have to do what I want” he trailed , you waited for him to continue. “I want you to-”, Chan was interrupted by your phone ringing, the song “what is love” echoing in the room.

It meant only one thing. It was Felix calling. ( it was the ringtone for him ). You answered the facetime “ hello, how you doing?” Felix asked happily “hi Felix , doing well how about you?” you replied. “Hey Changbin!” , this one was driving as he waved at you quickly. “I’m fine. hm Changbin and I were hanging out, and since we’re not too far, we wanted to know if you guys want to come with us at the mall. Y’know eating ice cream and hang out together”. Chan looked at you gesturing you to say no , since he couldn’t be seen on the screen. You eyed Chan as he made signs.. like he was sleeping? no no . tired! “Oh Lix’..hm..maybe next time.Chan and I are a bit tired”. Still sitting on Chan’s lap, you could feel his hard-on, you were extremely turned on just by feeling his covered erection. You gulped while Felix was whinning and telling you he missed you and Chan. “Well , oki then , next time” he sighed. “See you ”Changbin said.

Ending the call , you glared at him “ What?” he asked confused “It’s been ages since I saw them and went to the mall” you pouted sadly. “ y/n don’t exagerrate we saw them..LAST WEEK and we went the the mall there are like two weeks ago” you continued pouting trying to ignore how turned on you were. After a while, Chan cupped your cheeks softly “baby, i promise , tomorrow we’ll call them to hang out”  you missed your best friends and he could understand that, you smiled at him happily and hugged him tightly. “you’re welcome baby” he said laughing.

 “But where were we?” he resumed smirking. You sighed before answering  “you were on your way to torture me” he slapped your thigh laughing  “don’t say non-sense”.  “Well , I want you to” he thought for a moment again “I want you to ride me” he smirked. “It’s not a punishment” -- “ who talked about punishment. You said the winner does what he wants. And that’s what I want”  You rolled your eyes and smiled slightly .You liked loved riding him and damn he loved it too. You both loved the intimacy of this position. Skin against skin , bodies so close , looking into each others eyes. He loved how easily he can mark you , kiss you , hold you. He pushed your hair behind you as you caressed his cheek lovingly. You approached him , kissing him.

Getting hornier and impatient Chan talked again “what are you doing?! C’mon! Ride me babygirl!” —  “you’re so earger, let’s enjoy this-” —  “shh! I won! My command! My rule! You should obey!” he took your hands placing them on his belt . You got the hint as you unbuckled it “that’s my good girl”  he chuckled  “shut up idiot”  he slapped your ass lightly making you whine. You took his shirt off slowly , you stared at his well-built body practically drooling over it. “ you staring”  he smirked. “ how not to?” you kissed his neck as he groaned when you sucked little marks on his sensitive skin . You were too much for him , he grabbed your hips guilding you to grind on him harder. He backed away from you, locking eyes with you as he lifted your hoodie up just enough to see what’s under it. “fuck, so pretty!” he said breathless.

 He attacked your neck, leaving love bites. “Baby I want to make love to you” — “but what about the-” — “Don’t talk about this stupid game” he said laughing. “But babe” , you came back into your sitting position looking at him curiously waiting for him to finish his sentence “ I still want you to ride me” — “are you serious Chan?” you said laughing , he raised an eyesbrow “ Well , I guess I want to continue the game” you looked at him with a poker face. “BUT after  that I want to make love to you” he winked at you. You turned your head away trying not to laugh. Chan smiled at your reaction. “ ok then” you said “ yea let’s get the D“ he said laughing  “OHMYGODYOURESOSTUPID”. He laughed again before reconnecting his lips with yours. “AND YOU’RE SO SEXY AND ADORABLE , you’re my babygirl.. only mine” he whispered.

He lowered his boxer down a bit more and take your hand putting them on his erection “Do you feel that? You’re the reason of it” you bite your lips closing your eyes when you felt his cock twitched against your fingers. You took his hard-on out of his confinement, freeing him. He groaned as the cold air hit his manhood. Touching the red tip of his lenght you could feel the pre-cum already leaking. He put his fingers on the wet patch on your panties , making you whine at the contact. “Baby please” he pushed the material to the side “do you want me to prep-” — “Chan , let’s skip the foreplay” — “ everything for my princess”.

You aligned yourself on top of him. He held you by your hips helping you sink on him. Entering you, Chan let out a breathy moan. He felt so good inside of you. You rested your forehead on his , trying to catch your breath. “Babe, are you ok?” he asked caressing your burning cheek. “ yea yea , I’m fine don’t worry Channie” you smiled at him reassuringly. You started moving slowly, grinding on him sensually. He threw his head back , enjoying the pleasuring pace. You took the opportunity to kiss his neck ”Do you feel good baby?” you whispered onto his throat . “If i feel good? It’s like I’m in h-heaven” he said practically laughing “oh my god stop” you stopped slapping his torso. He kissed your cheek  “ it feels so good babygirl, you always make me feel that way. You’re so good for me” he answered. You smiled at him cheeks heating up. He put his hands on each side of your hips and suddenly thrusted into you. “ ah fuck!” you fell foward on his chest. “baby don’t stop riding me” you could feel him smirking. You started moving again , still holding them, Chan controlled the rythym and made you move a bit faster. He started matching his hips with yours. Your fingernails were buried deep into his bicep as red little marks appeared. You pulled at his hair as you felt the oh-so familiar knot in your lower stomach. You tighter around him “fuck are you close babygirl?” You could only nod. Chan’s hand travelled lower, caressing your stomach feeling the bulge on your lower abdoment, cursing he started rubbing your bud of nerves, drawing little circles. You felt like you were about to explode. “Baby, I-” —  “Babygirl cum for me” , just the sound of his voice made you cum the second after,  making you moan his name over and over loudly. Chan thrusted in you one last time, his cock twitching inside you as he cummed just after you , filling you to the brim. You let your head fell on his shoulder,  both of you breathing heavily. 

“You did so well for me” he purred caressing your back. Still inside you Chan moved and you winced in pain. “Y/n, you good?” he asked concerned  “yea yea I am. Can we just stay like that please?” — “of course” he said trying his best to make you more confortable on top of him. He closed his eyes enjoying the feeling of your warmth around him,  your skin against his, feeling your heartbeat. “how about we take a shower and go eat something?” he asked softly while caressing your back up and down slowly. “Not gonna lie, you ended me” he laughed out loud. “But I’m down to eat. I’m hungry” you smiled  ”well, fine, hmm I was thinking about calling Felix and Changbin to join us, I mean if you agr-” — ” yes!! Call them!” Chan laughed again. 

“Let’s take our shower now” he started helping you to stand up”— “ wait..no.wait!” — “ what is it? did I hurted you?” he asked almost panicked. “hey I’m ok don’t worry” you chuckled , “you agreed to stay like that for a moment” you pouted. “Oh. I thought you’d get ready now” — “ I just want you to stay inside me for a moment. You know, I want to stay in your arms” he smiled at your words. “so , you’re into cockwarming huh?” he said teasingly. “oh shut up idiot” . “c’mere” he gestured you to come closer. You hugged him right away. “I love you” — “ I love you even more princess” — “ nope , I don’t think so , I love you the most” - “nah I love you more” — “shh I love you more than Felix loves Changbin” — “YO what the f-” —  “shh” you kissed his cheek chuckling.

—

a/n (2) : it was in my drafts for so long omg

[nctzendreamz]

One Year Anniversary w/ BTS

a/n: i had written this so long ago, but I thought you guys might enjoy!! <3333

jin:

how would he feel?

i feel like this would be a very big deal for jin and he’d make sure you knew it too. with his hectic schedules and time being limited, the fact that you haven’t left him yet is a celebration within itself, but he still can’t help but wake up and feel like it’s a dream to be with someone he loves and admires so much.

what would y’all do?

definitely a stay in the house kind of day. you are an extreme homebody, so you didn’t have any problems with that. he would cook your favorite meal and the two of you would just eat and talk with each other about things going on. time would just be flying by with the two of enjoying each others company like it was a first date. your heart still skipped a beat when you heard his laugh, and his practically jumped out of his chest when your smiled radiated against him. expect passionate love time after your stomachs get settled as well.

what will he get you?

honestly, I feel like jin will get you a whole bunch of nick nack type of items that are special to your relationship like a picture of the two of you, a carving of a baby tiger that you can put on your table because that was your favorite animal to play with when he took you to the zoo, while also getting you a few personal things you like too, like a bracelet with your initials on it, a necklace with your favorite shape as the charm.

[[MORE]]

yoongi:

how would he feel?

yes, I’m fully aware that yoongi is not some emotionless man who doesn’t have a care in the world, but regardless I do think he’s a lowkey person. what I mean by this is that when it comes to your one year anniversary, he might feel head over heels about it, and want to plan this whole romantic thing for it, but you might catch him not exactly showing it by being all over you until later in the night. he would show you more affection with an abundance of gifts and not words.

what would y’all do?

you and yoongi usually just chilled together at your house or his when you both were free to, but for your anniversary you both agreed that you needed to leave the house and try something different. you both would get dressed up really nice, and go to an expensive restaurant, laughing at the prices of the food compared to the actual size of the meal and even though you ate it, you would end up getting fast food after. yoongi would not be able to keep his eyes off you and every time he saw you smile or heard you laugh, he would want to pull out a ring for you to be his for eternity.

what would he get you?

this is gonna so so typical lmao, but one of the things he would definitely do is write you a song. i feel like music is one of yoongi’s favorite ways to communicate, so writing you a song would be the first thing he thought of. secondly, he would get the two of you couple rings. he knew you always wanted those and he also agreed although he would never be caught saying it out loud that when the two of you were far apart, it would make him feel like you were still connected somehow. yoongi would also get you bags and bags of expensive clothes and hoodies, followed by a matching watch to the one you bought him for his birthday a couple months before.

hoseok:

how would he feel?

hoseok would be so overjoyed that you’ve made it this far, and you’re gonna know it. everyday that you’ve been together has done nothing but give him this warm feeling that he didn’t know he needed, and you truly are his best friend in the whole entire world. he loves you so much and is so grateful to have you so he’s going to do everything to make sure you understand that.

what would y’all do?

the one thing the other members always teased you and hoseok about was how “high end” you were. after you started dating hoseok, in his eyes you became one, so everything he had you had too. we all know how lavish he lives, and your 1 year anniversary would be nothing less than that. he will plan a 4 day trip to Japan. hoseok is taking you shopping until your arms fall off, you’re going to the most expensive restaurant, you’re going to the nicest hotel in the city, he’s going all out.

what would he get you?

i didn’t realize I lowkey said it above, but most definitely takes you shopping. he will legit just follow you around the store, letting you model everything you buy for him wishing he could do this all day. he’s also another member that will have you ICED OUT! more than any other member tbh. y’all will have so much matching jewelry, but his favorite was the gold J chain that you eagerly put around your neck.

namjoon:

how he feels about it?

oh does this boy love you more than anything. he might not have told you everyday, but you are his rock and his soulmate for real, yet he’s similar to yoongi in the sense that he’s not over the top about showing how he feels. actually, for the whole year you’ve been together namjoon has been lowkey, only allowing you to see his “soft” and complete boyfriend material side, nobody else. on his Instagram he posted a few aethstetic pictures and you could get the occasional women crush wednesday on his snap story, but the rest was really between the two of you. it was something you often complained about, which is why on the day of your one year namjoon really did try his best to be extra romantic.

what would y’all do?

another trip taker. he made it a surprise as he knew you’d never offer it even if you thought about it as you knew how tired he was. you woke in inside of a house with him sleeping beside you. yes, he rented a whole house for y’all to stay in for the weekend as he had to get back to work on Monday.

what did he get you?

instead of writing a song, he writes you a long poem about how favorite things about you and how much he loves you. namjoon isn’t much of a icy man, but he knows you love jewelry so he gets you plentiful.

jimin:

how does he feel about it?

y’all know jimin is somehow a soft baby but at the same time the manliest man ever. like idk what it is about him, but I soooo see him as the “I’m sweet&goofy to my baby but I can also get serious” type of guy, and that’s definitely what you’re gonna see. he’s gonna take your one year very seriously and he's so blessed to have you in his life. for every day that you’ve loved him, you’ll get all that love back in one day. he knows y’all have had your ups and down and just like Jin there were times where he swore you would leave him because of the hectic schedule, but y’all made it and he loves you so much.

what will y’all do?

thankfully, your anniversary fell on a time period where bts had some time off, so he got you a week vacation to busan, where you two honestly didn’t do anything over the top compared to hoseok. the both of you were perfectly content staying in bed all day, catching up on all the love you missed out on while the two of you were at work. he’ll continually post you all over his (private) Snapchat story to brag to all of his friends and members about the great time you’re having, and he’ll cook for you legit everyday. like it might as well be your birthday because he’s not letting you love a muscle even though it’s a mutual event.

what did he get you?

i feel like I’m saying jewelry for everyone but they all be low key blinged out I can’t help it. another couple ring appreciator. in yours, his initials were carved in the inside, and in his yours. he also gets you the most sentimental gift ever. a whole book with all your memories. pictures and pictures ft more pictures of every date, every selfie ugly or cute, and lastly a letter. in this letter jimin would tell you everything he’s never said. he’d tell you about how after the two of you hung up on FaceTime when he was on tour, he cried when he thought about the fact that he couldn’t touch you, kiss you, wipe your own tears away that he had just saw before the call ended. how just the sound of your laugh can cure any depression, sadness, or worrieness he feels. all of that.

taehyung:

how he feels about it?

it wouldn’t hit him until the day before that you two had made it this far. he would be so quiet and people would think he was upset, but in reality he couldn’t be happier. every memory would run through his mind, and it would put a permanent smirk on his face.

what will y’all do?

another trip taker. he asked you a month ago if you could go anywhere in the world where would it be, and you said Aruba. now you were in Aruba. he would be sure that he didn’t have any conflicting schedules, and would try to make it the best vacation ever. the two of you will do everything possible to do.

what did he get you? other than Aruba lmfao

a lot of clothes. he had thought long and hard about it, and he felt this was the best thing to buy. he also wrote you a letter like jimin, but he wasn’t very confident in it. he tried his best to express himself on paper, but how could he put his love for you in words? it was impossible.

jungkook:

how does he feel?

jungkook is going to try his hardest to be cool about everything. of course he will tell you how much he loves you, but he still will be fighting to be relaxed and calm about it all. it wouldn’t hit him until the day was over that he had truly reached a milestone with you.

what will y’all do?

in reality, he would want to take you on a trip so bad. he didn’t care where, he just wanted to get away with you. but he wasn’t allowed as bts was still promoting, so he had to settle on two days with you, promising more later. the fact that you said one day would’ve been okay made him feel even worse. he had let you plan it out since you told him you wanted to stay home. the two of you cooked together, failing horribly but making more memories. as you ate, you would just talk forever. it’s 1am, and you’re still talking. after that, you’re going to bed and not leaving until he has to leave again unless one of you have to pee.

what will he get you?

when he gave you a bag of photos, you thought it would be pictures of you, and some were, but a lot were pictures of nature.

“they remind me of you. even though you’re more beautiful.”

he would also get you jewelry because...it’s a must. he had a shopping spree waiting for you as well, but he was saving that for when you two actually had a vacation.

[buttercream-imagines]

I watched Joe’s live stream so you don’t have to (play by play reactions)

- announcement is a 24 hour livestream on ThatcherJoeVlogs on Friday starting at 6:00pm UK time (1:00pm EST) ft guests and Joe signing a lot of Username:Uprising

- I wish I had friends I could have a sleepover with and watch the livestream dude that would be so fun

- throwback to #1Dday I couldn’t even last seven hours with One Direction how the hell am I gonna do 24 hours with YouTubers

- just kidding I’m about to be dedicated as fuck

- Jack and Joe from 12:00-3:00 am

- #unpopularopinion I like Joe’s mustache

- my poor baby and his infected gums he was so ill he almost passed out whenever he ate cuz the pain as so bad fuck I want to hug him

- Joe speaking foreign languages is my aesthetic (and it reminds me that I really need to brush up on my spanish)

- “I’m trying to set up other things for the future cuz, you know, you never know how long this whole YouTube thing is gonna last before I’m back on the ol’ roof”

- “it’s getting to the point where I really do want a girlfriend”

- well I’ve always been at the point where I want to be your girlfriend so I don’t understand why this is such a predicament for you when I’m always available so quit complaining and hit me up

- no but really I want him to be happy and I think he would be so happy in a relationship so he’s just gotta get someone awesome

- (like I wasn’t mad when Caspar got with Maddie cuz she’s great so Joe needs someone great)

- main channel might become a lower priority in the future

- “And I’ll see you in the future with a Sugg Sunday Special. Who knows when it’ll be. I don’t wanna say that there’s gonna be an end to Sugg Sunday but... I don’t know. I’m not as fussed about that channel as much, which is a shame cuz that’s my main channel. I don’t know it’s been so nice to have a week [...] where I haven’t thought about that kind of stuff”

- obviously the idea of irregular Sugg Sunday Specials is sad but the idea of Joe putting out things because he feels obligated to and not because he enjoys them is even more sad

- “Wow that was deep whoa I went off! That’s what happens when Harry Styles starts playing music I start talking about proper stuff that I don’t normally speak about”

- yes, Harry Styles’ album was playing in the background throughout the entire livestream

- Kiwi is his favorite song (I shit you not that’s my favorite too it’s such a bop)

- serious Joe makes my heart feel warm

- he wants to raise a family in the countryside omg raising kids in the countryside he’s a country boy at heart

- “No iPads, no YouTube, no YouTube until you’re 12″

- “The dream is be able to have a lake and my dad can live in a little cave in the garden and look after the lake”

- honestly I love Joe wow

- HE DOESN’T LIKE THE WORD BUTTERCREAM GANG OR BUTTERCREAM SQUAD

- “We started it as like a little internal thing that we called ourselves and it spread and people call us the buttercream squad and I’m just like ugh it makes me like cringe out a bit whenever I hear it even though it’s what we call ourselves I guess. I don’t really call it that anymore”

- he starts the story of how they started to call themselves that at 28:38 of the video I’m not even going to try and summarize it ya’ll should just watch that bit

- okay but him, Conor, Caspar, and Mikey were the original four and that is so fucking random to me

- for some reason I just got really bummed out that he doesn’t like that name like okay Joe I literally have a blog dedicated to it so what the fuck am I supposed to do now

- he said none of them expected anyone else to start calling it that

- literally you’re all Internet sensations you should’ve known it was gonna get blown up when you gave yourself a name so honestly you brought this upon yourself lmao

- wOW MY HEART ACTUALLY IS BUMMED THAT HE DOESN’T LIKE IT

- also Byron is a member of their squad and literally none of us even talk about him/know him

- (side not Byron is hot as hell)

- I’m dead at how we all cling to whatever they say like the SECOND they tagged #buttercream on a photo we all went off

- I’m have an existential crisis wow

- “I just miss Jaspoli. That was my favorite, back in those days”

- I LEGIT THOUGHT I WAS GONNA CRY JUST NOW WOW MY HEART I MISS THOSE DAYS TOO JOE FUCK BRING IT BACK

- GO ON A JASPOLI TRIP PLS

- he wants a pet pig ??

- he’s gonna hang out with Brit soon !

- I ship him and Brit I have since the Jaspoli Coachella days (#unpopularopinion ??)

- literally the second I typed that he made a comment about it oh sorry sorry didn’t know that was a touchy subject

- reminder once again that I am single and available

- okay but they FaceTime every week for hours and that’s goals ???

- my jaw dropped at this bit he said he wants to stop going on nights out and start going to dinner parties and such, that he’s done with the night scene

- I thought he was joking but he was dead ass serious oh my god he’s growing up that felt weird to hear him say that

- “when the time’s right and it’s the right person” he’s a romantic person

- 52:58 through 53:05 is a joy

- “I’m a giver, not a receiver, take that as you will”

- he keeps getting shaky and he thinks it’s because he hasn’t eaten all day and it really worries me

- he’d like to live with both Oli and Josh (separately) and says that they’re both very mature

- his favorite YouTubers are the Sidemen and Caspar

- someone told him to collab with Kian and JC and he completely ignored it lmao

- HE SEES OLI AS A LITTLE BROTHER

- “I feel like I’ve watched him grow from like a little baby seed to like an oak tree. To see him do so well for himself now and he’s in a position where he’s just loving it and I’m so proud of him. I feel like a proud older brother and he’s said he sees me as like an older brother. We’ve had a lot of heart to hearts and stuff and he’s so good for advice. Even though he’s like my younger brother I go to him for advice a lot of the time cuz he’s been doing YouTube longer than I have and he’s just very knowledgeable about everything and he’s very sincere he cares about people a lot he puts others before him a lot of the time and he’s a genuine friend for life”

- THAT HAD ME SO FUCKING EMO

- it takes him a long time to open up to people, he’s usually quite shy when he meets people for the first time unless there’s that instant “chemical spark”

- he talked about being nice to people and compared life to climbing up a tree and how you should be nice to everyone you pass on your way up because if you’re not and then you start to drop, the people you pass won’t be there to grab your hand and stop you from falling

- in girls he looks for someone who doesn’t take themselves too seriously, not too obsessed about themselves

- obviously first attraction is important but ultimately it’s about the personality (said every guy ever tbh) and then mentioned how if looks are that important to you it means you probably care more about how other people perceive you and your girlfriend than how you feel about your girlfriend herself

- “I want to find someone who can only add something to my life. Someone who improves my life and makes me a happier person. At the moment I’m a really happy person so anyone who has that affect to make it better is the one for me”

- reminder once again that I am single

- like I’m not drop dead gorgeous but I’ve got some stuff to offer I have nice eyes and good hair and my personality is great aside from the occasional down periods due to mental illness but you know we all have our flaws

- he talked seriously quite a bit in the stream and I’m really digging it I like serious Joe

- someone asked for advice on having a crush on your ex and he talked about moving on because it’s probably not good for you but then he said “unless you think they were the one”

- one of the best relationships he’s ever been in has been with someone older than him

- “Maybe I need to go for a cougar. Any 40 year old ladies?”

- *awkward laugh* “I’ve just admitted to a live stream that I’m after a mum. No I’m only joking. Imagine that I could end up being your dad”

- Poop Scoop with Brit on Friday

- he’s in no rush to have children

- “I’m fortunate enough to act like an immature child and get away with it a lot of the time”

- he doesn’t really want to settle down/get married anytime soon because he meets new people everyday and the idea of getting really settled down scares him because he never knows who he’s going to meet the next day

- “that’s why I’ve never- well not that you know of- had any public relationships”

- what the hell does that mean Joseph

- “I’m very good at keeping it all under wraps”

- WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN JOSEPH

- he’s literally so hungry he’s shaking Josh hurry up he needs food

- “I hope Caspar’s there cuz I haven’t seen him in bloody ages and I miss the ol’ boy. I miss the bloody weirdo”

- he loves livestreams because it’s the closest we can get to all sitting in a room together and “having a good ol’ standard chit chat”

- reminder of the 24 hour live stream on ThatcherJoeVlogs starting at 6:00pm UK time (1:00pm EST)

- “New vlog soon. New gaming video soon. I’m back. Don’t worry I’m not going anywhere. I’m still loving life. And more importantly, you’re all bloody legends.”

---

that was a lot there you go (or you could just watch the live stream idk)

also I wish I knew people who lived near me 😭 I would so fucking love to have a sleepover and make good friends and watch Joe

[17-imagines]

[scenario] [request] first love

3: “Please… Don’t leave.”  30: “It’s not what it looks like…”  31: “You lied to me.” 

(this is a hanahaki!au bc i felt like suffering) 

hanahaki disease: results from one-sided love. the infected person starts to cough up flower petals. (more details in the fic - or shoot me a mssg!) 

Title: first love

Member: Mingyu ft. bff Wonwoo

Genre: ANGST // hanahaki disease // good end

Word Count: 2667

“Here, let me,” Mingyu says, using his hip to bump you away from the large pot of ramen bubbling on the stove. He takes the wooden spoon from you as you stand there looking offended, arms crossed.

“You always cook,” you huff, jumping up to sit on the counter beside him. He shrugs, grinning at the apron tied around your waist.

“So? Your job is just to be cute for the children’s enjoyment,” he jokes, stepping out of the way from your flailing leg. “Watch it,” he warns, pointing the wooden spoon dripping with broth at you. “I have possession of a weapon.”

“And I can get Jihoon,” you respond smugly, a horrified expression overtaking Mingyu’s face. He narrows his eyes. “You wouldn’t.”

“I would. Ji-” He drops the spoon into the pot and charges at you, hands grabby and precise, targeting your ticklish spots. He begins to attack you mercilessly until you give in, near to tears. “Wonwoo, Mingyu’s bullying me.”

The passing male gives Mingyu a look, then looks to you and shrugs. “Seems normal to me,” he grins, walking back into his room while a victorious Mingyu dances around the kitchen happily.

The sound of hissing interrupts his happy jig, the ramen’s soup bubbling over the top of the pot and onto the stove. He lets out a scream and immediately turns of the heat, removing the pot and placing it onto a different spot.

“Dinner’s… Ready?” He smiles sheepishly, fanning away the wisps of smoke emitting from the overheated pot.

You roll your eyes and help with distributing the bowls, personally handing each member their bowl. A series of muffled thank you’s sounds from the living room, and you and Mingyu take a seat at the dining table, alone.

“We’re working on our new album,” he says, slurping his noodles enthusiastically. “I’m going to help write the raps, and who knows - Jihoon-hyung said if I learned to compose, I could make my own track, like Hoshi-hyung!”

“I’m really proud of you - you guys,” you stumble, chewing on a spoonful of food.

“Thanks!” He grins, reaching to his cup of water. He holds it in his hand, the grin disappearing as he stares into his glass. “But… That means we can’t hangout as often. You’re not bothered by it, right? Because if you are, you could always-”

“Not at all!” You cut in, a smile on your face despite the ache in your chest, heart throbbing when the smile reappears on his face. “I don’t mind. I just want you all to be successful.”

“Oh, I’m glad you understand. I’ll call and text frequently, so you won’t be lonely.”

He continues to rave on about the new tracks they’re writing, about the concept they’re going for, and how he hopes he doesn’t piss Jihoon off as much as he did last recording.

“He threatened to shove the mic up my ass,” Mingyu grumbled, rubbing his backside. “I’m not into that stuff.”

Midnight came around sooner than you thought, and the manager offered to take you home, Mingyu in the seat beside you. When the van pulled into your apartment’s parking lot, Mingyu took hold of your sleeve, hesitant to let you leave.

“Are you sure it’s okay?” He asks, face serious. You nod.

“I’ll be okay without you for a few weeks,” you reassure him, smiling softly. “Don’t worry about me. Just do your best.”

You say goodbye to the manager and wave to Mingyu, who switches to the front seat. He watches your figure retreat into your complex building, eyes never leaving until you enter safely.

“Okay. Let’s go, hyung.”

-

You were okay for the first few days. Visiting the Seventeen dorm was a rare occasion on its own, so you didn’t miss it as much as you thought you would - but you did miss sitting in on dance practices, watching the boys shout and groan through vigorous choreographies.

On the sixth day, you woke up in the middle of the night coughing, throat itchy. The feeling was almost like a strand of hair getting caught in your mouth, uncomfortable and impossible to remove without effort.

You remove yourself from your sheets and go to the kitchen to get a glass of water, in an attempt to wash down whatever was keeping you up.

It didn’t go down - it went up. 

You cough, feeling the object nudge up your throat, and cough again, dislodging the soft material. Reaching into your mouth, you remove a single lilac flower petal, eyes full of confusion and fear.

This isn’t happening.

But it is, and you know exactly why.

You’re in love with Kim Mingyu, it’s one-sided, and the only way to stop the disease from destroying you from the inside out is for him to love you back, or remove the source of it all, thus removing all feelings of love towards Mingyu.

You have two options. Make Kim Mingyu fall in love with you, or fall out of love with Kim Mingyu.

And you don’t know what would hurt more.

He doesn’t need a distraction like a girlfriend, but you don’t want to resent him. It’s not his fault you’re in love with him; it’s not his fault he’s your type.

Maybe it’s your fault?

-

“Hey, Jihoon-hyung, have you heard anything from (F/N)?” Mingyu murmurs, sitting down beside the resting producer. The practice room is hot and stuffy, and some of the other members have gone off to search for a fan.

“No,” Jihoon huffs, fanning himself with a towel. “She doesn’t talk to me unless it’s about you or food,” he snorts, chugging the rest of his water bottle. “What’s going on between the two of you, anyway?”

“Nothing?” Mingyu questions, “What do you mean by that? We’re friends.” Jihoon rolls his eyes, shoving him playfully.

“Right, and I’m Brian Puspos.”

“You’re not, though.”

Jihoon face palms with an audible slap, Soonyoung laughing beside him. “I was being sarcastic. Of course you wouldn’t catch on.”

“Okay, my stupidity isn’t the subject of the matter - it’s (F/N). She stopped replying to my texts and calls.”

“Why don’t you ask manager-hyung to drive you to her place? He likes her anyway. Calls her a good influence,” Soonyoung suggests, stealing Jihoon’s towel to fan himself, grinning at the scowling boy.

“I… I can’t,” Mingyu mutters, looking away. “I have to finish my track.”

“You’re sounding a lot like someone we know,” Wonwoo chimes in, handing Jihoon a handheld fan. The male makes a face at the side-comment, but thanks him for the kind gesture. “If you can’t, I’ll go for you, if it makes you feel better. She’s probably just studying, anyway.”

“You will?!” Mingyu perks up, tackling Wonwoo into a hug. “Thank you! Call me when you get there, okay? Better yet, FaceTime me! I wanna see her too.”

Soonyoung and Jihoon exchange glances, and Wonwoo grumbles on about ‘someone’ being ‘oblivious’.

Wonwoo catches their manager in the hall and asks to be driven over, texting a hyperactive Mingyu updates.

Mingyu: Are you there yet?

Wonwoo: No.

Mingyu: Now?

Wonwoo: No. I’ll call you, ‘kay? Stop bothering me. If you’re going to work, work, or else we’re turning back around and your ass is getting in this car instead.

Mingyu: o k o k o k

Wonwoo knocks twice, three times, then four. He’s about to give up as he raises his fist to knock a fifth time, when a weak ‘I’m coming’ resounds from the other side, the door clicking open slowly.

The first thing Wonwoo says is, “Holy shit.”

“Good to see you too,” you mumble, pulling your face mask further onto your face. “What do you want?”

He gives you a look over, observing your reddened eyes and heavy eyebags. 

The scene over your shoulder is no different, instant cup noodle cups littering your counter, pain medication bottles in a visible corner.

“You should go to the hospital if you’re this sick. Mingyu’s been fussing over you for the last few days,” Wonwoo says, and the sound of his name prompts a flash of pain to run through your chest.

“No - anywhere but the hospital. I… This isn’t anything serious,” you lie, petals poking the back of your throat threateningly. “…And what was that, about Mingyu?” You step to the side and gesture for him to come in, shutting the door behind him.

“You two are impossible, running circles around each other. Just confess and date already, I hate being the middleman.” Wonwoo plops down on your couch and you take a seat beside him, shaking your head profusely.

“He doesn’t like me.” You want to tell him, ‘this sickness is proof’, but Wonwoo speaks before you can.

“Mingyu’s the most oblivious man alive. He probably doesn’t realize it, but it’s all in the way he acts and cares for you. It’s different. You’re different for him.”

Given newfound hope, the joy doesn’t last. 

Because with a heavy heave, you cough up the built of petals you’ve tried so hard to hold back.

Despite the mask concealing your lips, the petals poke out of the mask and flutter into your lap, a few crimson stained. Wonwoo is quick to react, reaching over to pull your mask off without warning.

“It’s… It’s not what it looks like.”

“Really?! Because it seems to me, you’re a liar.” Wonwoo drops the mask onto your coffee table, causing the remaining petals to spill out of the mask.

“Tell me why you hid it for so long.”

You begin to sob, holding your face in your hands. “He doesn’t love me back, Wonwoo, and I’m dying because of it. Do you think that’s something he wants to hear?”

Ignoring your question, he grumbles worriedly, “Christ, look at the amount of blood mixed in with these -” Wonwoo grabs a tissue from his pocket and holds it to your mouth, pulling out his phone and pressing speed-dial.

“Who are you calling?”

As Wonwoo talks rapidly and worriedly to the manager over the phone, your focus on the male blurs, head pounding. You let out a weak cough, and a dozen fluttering petals fall to the floor. Your vision blacks out, and your body falls limp against the couch.

-

“Hello?” Mingyu hums, pausing the loud track he’s working on. Wonwoo sounds frantic, panting, and wait - was he crying?

“Mingyu - hospital - now.” A location is sent from their manager’s phone from the nearby hospital, and he doesn’t have the chance to click save on the file, because he bolts out of the studio to wave down a taxi.

“What’s happening, hyung?” Wonwoo’s wiping away stray tears when the tired, worn out Mingyu rushes into the emergency waiting room. “Where’s (F/N)?!”

“She’s fine. They’re giving her pain medications and waiting for her to come to.” Mingyu sighs in relief, but Wonwoo gives him a cold look. “We need to talk.”

He guides the younger outside, towards an isolated spot in the hospital’s garden.

“Do you love her, Mingyu?”

“What? Come again?” He stares at the older with bewilderment in his innocent eyes, “What’s that got to do with anything?”

“Because she loves you, Mingyu. So much, that it’s killing her.” Mingyu’s speechless, eyes dropping to the ground, and that’s when he sees the smudges of blood on the tops of Wonwoo’s sneakers.

“You’re… You’re joking. This is my fault? How could it be?! I didn’t know - she didn’t say - hyung, please. This isn’t real.” Tears begin to sting at his eyes, and he wipes them away stubbornly. “You’re wrong.”

“No, you’re wrong. You’re the oblivious one. You never saw the way she looked at you, but the others did. It’s different. Full of love. She’s in love with you, and it’s unfair for you to blame her for not telling you because it was in front of you this whole time.”

Wonwoo’s phone buzzes, and with a glance, he lets out a shaky breath.

“She’s awake. She’s in a lot of pain, Mingyu. Either you ‘fess up, or let her let go of you. Room 170.”

Mingyu takes off in a sprint, tears rolling down his cheeks as he runs up countless flights of stairs. His manager greets him, but he’s too much in a rush to see you to properly greet back.

“You lied to me,” he bursts in, tears still spilling. It hurts even more when he sees the bags of fluid hooked up to you, a pained expression on your too-perfect face. “You told me you’d be fine without me. I took that as you not needing me.”

Broken, you look away, anywhere but him.

“I’m sorry,” you quietly reply. “I’m also sorry for loving you. I’ll end it now.”

“No - don’t be stupid, don’t for god’s sake -” He kneels to be in your line of sight, smiling sadly at you. “You know, I don’t know what love is. This is the first time I’ve ever considered being in love with someone, and it’s scary.”

He pulls a nearby chair up beside you and reaches over to you, gently taking your hand in his. Your touch is cold, and it saddens him to know how alone you were. He presses your hand to his cheek, sighing.

“But you know, love doesn’t sound as scary if it means being in love with you. And it took you almost dying for me to realize that, and I can’t apologize enough for that.” He kisses your hand, and when you begin to cry, he reaches out and brushes them away, leaning over to kiss your face gently.

“It sounds perfect. I love you. I’ve loved you from the beginning. I failed to reciprocate it, and the separation only made you lonelier. I’m so sorry. I love you. I’m never leaving you alone again, and I’m going to make this up to you - for the rest of my life, I will never let you hurt alone ever again.”

You finally muster up the strength to speak, sniffling as Mingyu begins to sob again. “I love you too, cry-baby.” He looks at you, eyes narrowed and full of tears.

“How can you be so positive when you’re like this?” He wipes away his tears, pouting. “Next time… Tell me when you’re feeling lonely.”

“I will.” He smiles, kissing your forehead gently, catching a glimpse of the full garbage bin, filled to the brim with lilac petals. He frowns and glances at you. “You know what lilac flowers mean?”

He shakes his head. “Do I want to know?”

“It means first love.”

“Well, that’s fitting,” he jokes, then winces at his inconsiderate joke. “Too soon?”

“Ass.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll be your first and last.” He grins, and you do too, genuinely. The dull pain in the back of your throat and the burning in your lungs subsides, because you’re no longer coughing up petals on the hour.

-

“I better go. Only family is allowed to stay after hours, right? Your parents were here earlier while you were resting, they’re getting food from the cafeteria.” He stands and stretches, kissing your forehead lovingly. “I’ll be back tomorrow morning.”

He steps around the pile of gifts from the members, a pile that consists of letters, teddy bears, and boxes of chocolate, along with a few ‘get well soon’ balloons.

“Please… don’t leave,” you mumble weakly, holding onto his sleeve. “You’re my family too.”

His eyes widen at the statement, cheeks flooding with warmth and redness. “Hey, that’s playing unfair.”

“I’ll play unfair if it means you cuddling with me.” You pat the space beside you, and he glances back at the door before giving in.

He squeezes into the bed, long legs tangled with yours. “Better?” He asks, smiling at you.

“Better. I love you, Mingyu.”

“I love you more, jagi.”

[pixie-daydream]

i haven’t ranted in a while but BOYS ARE FUCKING ANNOYING and i just need to rant okay

first of all i feel like we need some backstory in case anyone actually reads this. this is gonna be long as fuck but I’M REALLY IRRITATED EVEN A YEAR LATER so i just need a place to let it loose so i’m not reeling over it in my head. a year ago at the end of my senior year of college i befriended two guys, one of which i had a mutual crush on, the other i saw strictly as a friend. all three of us were friends. it was cool. it was fun, they were funny, we became friends in such a short amount of time but got so close so fast. the three of us hung out a few times in person and also had a groupchat going, whatever. me and my crush started talking just us and that’s a whole different story but yknow, that whole thing happened and we started liking eachother more and more, it was getting pretty deep, we’d facetime-sleepover a few times, blah blah blah, met up to hang out/whatever you wanna call it, it was cute, it was magical, it was a great time, it didn’t end up working out, but it’s an important part of this story. so that’s just some backstory. so while me and my crush are crushing on eachother, me and our friend are also talking outside of the groupchat... basically they both started talking to me on the side and the groupchat died. interesting. but anyways... MY FRIEND is joking around calling me his wife bc he gave me this fake ass plastic ring at a party and clearly i thought it was just a joke. it’s something i’d joke around about, like “haha you gave me a ring, we’re married obvz”... i didn’t really think anything of it cus it really wasn’t that deep. so i THOUGHT that was all just a joke between friends but then he started getting deep with it and telling me i’m such a beautiful person and any guy would kill and be lucky to have a girl like me and all this other shit, how he wanted to be with me forever and it would be us together forever and he’d die a better man having known me... all this weird shit. now DUMB ASS ME being the insecure person that i am honestly just thought he was being nice like i didn’t think he was being serious i thought he was just being a nice friend and saying something nice to another friend but in the back of my mind i was like “oh shit what if he likes me” cus yknow, you never know. but like i said i was insecure as fuck and my confidence level was so low it was almost nonexistent so i was like yeah he prob doesn’t like me, i didn’t even think my crush liked me back at that point but ANYWAYS i digress....... sooner or later my friend starts getting weirdly jealous of literally anyone i hung out with, guy friends, girl friends, it didn’t matter he was just mad that i hung out with other people solo and only hung out with him in a group setting. so i was like wtf chill out it’s just convenient for me to hang w other people bc they’re close by whereas he lived way further away and ALSO, i knew him for less amount of time so for me w the social anxiety in MOST instances it takes me a while to get comfortable w someone on that level to hang out just us two, but he never understood that.... anyways...... he found out me and my crush facetimed and again got weirdly jealous, and was like ‘clearly u like him better than me bc we never facetime’ which 1st of all HE NEVER ASKED ME TO FT HIM, second of all he has a fucking android so 4+5=48 wtf how were we supposed to facetime u fucking moron. but clearly my crush told him we facetimed cus nobody else knew at the time, so clearly the two of them were talking about me. and my friend was asking if i had a crush on him, which at the time i didn’t really wanna say bc i wasn’t sure if my crush liked me back and i didn’t want it getting back to him so i just played it coy.... but it was obvious i had a crush on the kid so my friend could really just do the math. but my friend was being so weird about it pulling the “marriage” card saying if we’re married why am i cheating on him AND HONESTLY ONCE AGAIN I THOUGHT WE WERE JUST JOKING AROUND yet at the same time he was really accusing me over absolutely nothing and i was like oh shit is he actually mad........ and then eventually he’s like “chill it’s just a joke” but he would consistently say “whoever makes you happy even if i dont understand why you like him” and shit like that. anyways, he knew i had a crush on the guy and he knew the guy had a crush on me, from the inception of his crush on me apparently, and said MOST of their conversations were about me. everyone thought the two of them were like bffed out, yet apparently most of their convos were about me... ok.... anyway. point being, he knew how much we liked eachother. fast forward a couple months, over the course of the summer me and my friend were still friends, we’d hang out like once a week in a big group of people but we were always fighting. it was like fighting between siblings kinda that’s what it reminded me of but would play it off as a joke, but he’d still pull the husband/wife joke thing and i’d go along with it cus again i’m an idiot and even tho it was starting to get weird i didn’t wanna look like i was taking it seriously since most of the shit he said was a joke anyway. for example, around this time i was starting to sense something odd going on with my crush... eventually things were starting to fizzle out which was devastating to me but again that’s a whole different story i don’t really need to get into. i mentioned to my friend how i was kinda worried i was gonna lose some people in my life, bc if i pick up on the slightest thing that’s off i go into panic mode, and my friend was like ‘so screw everyone else. it’s just me and you. and since i’m your husband you should let me take you out on a date.’ and i was like ????? wtf........ i dont wanna go on a fucking date with you. i was like ‘i mean, we can hang out’ and he goes ‘so date?’ and i was  like ‘no...’ and he’s like ‘why not??? why wont you let me take you out??? i thought we were best friends. best friends can’t go out together and hang out?” LIKE. LITERALLY. THIS IS WHAT HE WAS SAYING. and i said i’d hang with him but he always would try and turn it into a date and he goes “chill, do you actually think i’d take you out on a romantic date? i’m not about that life.” ??????????? alright, s you’re just joking then? EVEN THOUGH YOU CONSTANTLY BRING UP WEIRD SHIT IN A ROMANTIC WAY ABOUT ME ALL THE TIME. it’s just a joke tho. alright. so anyway, the day after this happens, my crush mentioned my friend wanted us all to go to the beach or something, so clearly they were speaking to eachother at that point. and then my friend texted me at the same time asking if me and my crush were an item yet..... and at that point i still never outright admitted i liked him so i was panicking bc i knew they were talking about me and i was like why the fuck is he asking me this........... anyway i said no and my friend said he was gonna “hook it up” and tell him to ask me out to which i said WHY because I DON’T WANT/NEED OTHER PEOPLE MEDDLING IN MY LIFE WITHOUT ME ASKING. just a side note i’ve never been in a relationship i’m VERY new to someone even having actual reciprocated feelings for me and i really really REALLY REALLY liked my crush a lot... like i adored him and definitely could have fallen for him truly but i did not want anything to mess it up, just wanted to let it evolve naturally and let it keep progressing slowly bc i was terrified to lose him and i especially didn’t want this fucking idiot to talk to him for me since i was starting to get sufficiently creeped out by him. so his response was “bc you’d say yes” and i just didn’t respond bc i was so annoyed at that point AND THE FUCKER HAD THE NERVE 3 HOURS LATER TO SAY “why didn’t you text me back? that’s not what best friends do...” tHaT’s NoT wHaT bEsT fRiEnDs Do ??? WHAT KIND OF FUCKING CHILDISH BULLSHIT IS THAT? keep in mind this fucker is like 25 years old yet he pulls cards like that... WTF. anyway. i find it very odd how after that conversation, things with me and my crush started to fizzle out. very odd. i can’t fully blame it on my friend bc in the future i’d found out from my crush that he himself was just........ an idiot, i don’t really know what his issue was but he fucked up on his own.... HOWEVER, i definitely find it sus that my friend was saying he was gonna hook us up or w/e and then suddenly it turned to shit. interesting. ok. so things w my crush were getting weird, i was clearly upset by it and my friend picked up on it and attempted to reassure me that my crush loved me and was obsessed and wasn’t going anywhere, i even asked him if he said anything to him since YKNOW last time i checked, he said he was gonna talk to him about us, yet he claims he didn’t.... #surejan. but bottom line was my friend’s advice to me was “who cares” if my crush isn’t talking to me... when REALLY IT WAS MORE THAN A CRUSH AT THIS POINT, silly me knows now that boys are not to be trusted and just bc they say all this lovey dovey deep stuff to u and make it seem like they truly r falling for u, it might not be the case.... but at the time i really thought we loved n cared about eachother on a way deeper level than just crushing so I WAS OBVIOUSLY RLY UPSET, and for my friend to say to just get over it pissed me off to no end. ESPECIALLY BC HE LITERALLY SAID “i dont get why you like him when he’s nowhere near as interesting as i am.” HE REALLY SAID THAT. MY FRIEND. SAID THAT. AS IF THAT’S GONNA MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER. and i kept saying it’s not that simple i can’t just get over it or move on if he’s being weird and not talking to me as much... he was trying to tell me it was UNHEALTHY for me to be upset if he wasn’t responding to me (to be clear the point wasn’t that he wasn’t answering, it was that after talking nonstop every day all day and building that trust with eachother and being so sweet to eachother, he went from all that to just one word answers and barely talking. like clearly somehting was wrong and he wouldn’t tell me what it was which scared me, THAT is what was upsetting me. i can handle someone not responding. just fyi.) ,,,,,, so my friend would say that was unhealthy yet him getting mad at me and being jealous if i hung out with other people was totally normal??? ok. ALSO, A SIDE NOTE, i have ANOTHER friend, we’ll call him jim for now just so things don’t get confusing..... while all this stuff with my crush was going on, me, my friend, jim, and a few others were hanging out and food was involved so we were on line to get food and jim put some on my plate for me. really not a big deal....... i do that for people all the time and my friends do it for me like it really IS NOT THAT DEEP. YET MY FRIEND TEXTS ME THAT NIGHT SAYING ‘i need to talk to u........... i think u and jim are in a secret relationship or he’s in love with u bc he put food on ur plate for you and u just said thank you and moved on like it was nothing.’ LIKE. HE REALLY. FUCKING. SAID. THAT. !!!!. Guys. help. when i say i laughed for 15 minutes I REALLY WAS ROLLING. this guy was getting heated bc a friend put food on my plate for me. fast forward to my friend having a party, jim was there, a bunch of friends were there and we were drinking so we stayed overnight but everyone had left by morning and i was the only one there. so finally my friend gets to hang out w me one on one for a few hours. we were just shooting the shit, talking, watching tv. whatever. we also talked about my crush and once again my friend was saying to just get over it which pissed me off. i also ended up texting my crush that night bc it’d been a while and i was like freaking out over that, long story short i could tell he really was done with me so from that point on i decided if he wanted to talk to me he can come to me bc i was done looking like a fool and texting him getting 3 second responses and an attitude and making myself crazy and feeling disappointed over it. so not only was my crush no longer talking to me but my friend was also being short in his responses to me from that point as well. and i tried to just be normal about it and keep it lighthearted, talking as usual with the same stuff we always spoke about, but the conversation was like pulling teeth and i was like wtf??? like why is everyone being weird with me not wanting to talk to me? and my friend who knew i was upset over the crush thing was doing it to me as well.. so i was like okay then, guess i’m on my own. a few weeks later, about exactly a year ago, my friend texted me again asking what was up and stuff and asked me out of NOWHERE if i had talked to my crush lately. keep in mind, i literally never speak about my crush or bring him up on my own to my friend bc i know how jealous he gets, if we talk about him it’s bc someone else brought it up.... so i responded saying it’d been 2 weeks but who’s counting cus yknow, I WAS HURT. and my friend goes “well clearly you aren’t over it.” ..... NO SHIT SHERLOCK YOU FUCKING PENDEJO I FREAKING ADORED THE KID AND REALLY LIKE IDK LOVED HIM I GUESS OR WHATEVER, AND GOT SOMEWHERE WITH HIM I NEVER GOT WITH ANYONE LIKE I /NEVER/ FELT THAT WAY BEFORE ABOUT ANOTHER PERSON AND NEVER EXPERIENCED THOSE FEELINGS SO OBVIOUSLY. I WASN’T GONNA BE OVER IT. YOU STUPID FUCK. but anyways... i basically said that to him in nicer words lol and once again he was like get over it.... so i went to bed upset over it cus idek why he brought that up... also keep in mind, my friend and my crush no longer spoke to eachother either. they pretty much stopped talking when the two of them started talking to me one on one if that makes sense... they’d talk here and there but their ‘friendship’ ended when our friendships began. anyways. i woke up the next day and my friend texted me saying “I TALKED TO [insert crushes name here]” ....... EXCUSE ME YOU FUCKING CUNT BAG. WHEN THE HELL DID I ASK YOU TO TALK TO HIM???????? DID I EVER SAY “pls ask him what happened between us”...... NO. I REALLY DIDN’T. SO WHY. WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT AND MEDDLE IN MY LIFE ONCE AGAIN? and my friend told me “I don’t need to get into details bc i don’t wanna hurt your feelings, but he said he did not like you anymore and said he was done.” yeah WAY TO SPARE MY FUCKING FEELINGS YOU COCKMOUTH. guys i cannot even begin to explain the emotions at that point i didn’t know whether to be heartbroken or infuriated or both but i was fucking upset let me tell you. i mean, it was pretty obvious my crush was done with me but this was somewhat of an actual confirmation bc at that point i still held out some bit of hope that he might try and talk to me again but clearly it wasn’t happening. so my friend goes “well at least now you know the truth” AS IF HE WAS DOING ME A FAVOR. and then i was really fucking sad and even more depressed than usual, and my friend seemed like he was annoyed with me for still being upset over it... first of all you assface, there’s no time period for how long someone is “allowed” to be sad over something and for ME ESPECIALLY, THE MOST EMOTIONAL PERSON ON EARTH, two weeks is definitely not long enough for me to be sad so you can shut up. but anyway, after that, we really didn’t talk much until the end of that month. i hadn’t heard from my crush either until one day he liked a few of my pictures... i also noticed he and my friend were interacting on social media as well, and that night my friend messaged me for the first time in a while saying he was going to visit our old school and asked if i wanted to come say hi to everyone. he also invited jim. interesting considering they hated eachother but anyway. i found it a BIT peculiar that this was all happening at once but i hadn’t seen my friends in a while so i went, and he “casually” mentioned that “[crush]” wanted to meet up with him so we were meeting up with him or whatever. at this point i was like WTFWTFWTF even tho i had a feeling that was what was gonna happen anyway. but i was really taken aback, cus like, my friend knew how i felt about the situation and how upset i was and i was shocked he didn’t even ask me about it first, but i didnt have much of a choice at this point so... we met up with him and it was so fucking awkward bc he really was gonna pretend like NONE OF WHAT WE HAD OR DID OR SAID OVER THE SUMMER EVER EVEN HAPPENED, and he was being so quiet... i just carried on being normal myself masking the fact that i was having major internal anxiety but if he was gonna act like nothing happened so was i. we met up with our other friends and it was fun, my crush barely spoke to me and my friend also barely spoke to me, they pretty much spoke to eachother the whole time and when i tried to interject or contribute to the convo they’d basically ignore me or just go ‘haha......’ or some shit. so i was really like ???? WHY DID MY FRIEND EVEN INVITE ME IF HE WAS JUST GONNA KNOWINGLY PUT ME INTO A REALLY AWKWARD SITUATION AND NOT EVEN TALK TO ME ALMOST THE WHOLE TIME. and then that night, where i feel like he’d usually have texted me to ask how i felt about the whole situation, he didn’t say shit. THE NEXT DAY THO, MY CRUSH STARTED SNAPCHATTING ME AGAIN and basically was really drunk and trying to get me back, gave me this whole sob story of how he fucked up and as much as i wanted him back obviously knew he prob didn’t mean it... but anyway, the fact that he tried that after seeing me in person and not even talking to me was just weird but i had a feeling he and my friend kinda talked about getting me to see him that day like i feel like it was a premeditated plan. anyways. things w my crush stayed quiet from that point on and so did things w my friend until ANOTHER month later when i sent my friend something that reminded me of him, he was like ‘can we be friends again?’ and i was like yeah we’re not nOT friends....... he was the one who wasn’t rly talking to me anyway so whatever. but we were texting AND WHILE WE WERE TEXTING, I GET A SNAPCHAT FROM NONE OTHER THAN MY CRUSH. i was super fucking confused since i hadnt heard from him since the last time he messaged me and also a little weirded out how they both pop back into my life at tthe same time..... but anyways, just to tie up the crush story, this is when i found out my crush initially stopped talking to me bc he felt like it wasn’t going anywhere (which is bullshit but ok, he clearly just wanted to bang me but i didnt wanna do that without being completely sure that he wasnt gonna just hit it n quit it.... so he quit it before he could even hit it i guess) and claimed we were ‘just talking’ and it ‘never amounted to anything’ which is also bs to me bc it was WAY deeper than just talking so if he wants to pretend like it wasnt that deep he’s an idiot bc he was the one making it deep. but anyways. that’s just a SHORT version of the end of that story (i was devastated i guess i consider that my first real true heartbreak and it took me SO long to finally be okay but y’all don’t worry bc I’M OKAY NOW and i’m happy. i lowkey still miss it sometimes but i’m happy now n he’s happy so like whatever. we’re cool)..... but anyways i feel like i should just wrap that story up before i get to the rest of the whole shit with my friend lol ANYWAYS ........   me and my friend weren’t really talking anymore after that, it’d pretty much be social media liking or comments but that was about it. he would message me every now and again tho to be like ‘why haven’t we talked’ and stuff like that, or if he said he missed me i’d be like ‘i miss you too’ and he’d be like ‘no you don’t.......’ and try to make ME feel guilty for no reason. and for real, our friendship was fun a lot of the time. i did miss it and i missed him too. he was a funny dude and we had a lot of common interests but most of the time i felt like i was doing something wrong or he was constantly trying to make me admit to him that he was my favorite, that i liked him the best, and was just generally possessive and obsessive and weird about it, so why keep that going especially when we had our own lives and shit. come january he wished me a happy new year and when i responded a day later (i didn’t have service) he was like “yeah, we’re not friends anymore....” ??? so wtf ????? i was like ??? he didn’t reply until like a week later saying ‘hey’ bitch what i thought we weren’t friends anymore so wtf. and the thing with me is, if you’re my friend you’re always my friend, i’ll always care even if we haven’t spoken in a while but i’ll always consider you a friend. yet this guy thinks that’s not true if we don’t talk 24/7 apparently. he’d constantly tell me ‘that’s not what real friends do...’ and that type of BS, make ME feel like a shitty friend, yet still hit me up and say hey???? but it was a vicious cycle of him saying hey, me replying thinking maybe it’ll be different and then him just going right back to saying we’re not friends. and that shit was exhausting to me. he’d text me a few times asking if i wanted to work on a movie project with him (he’s in film and i’m an actress) but i was busy with other shit and he wouldn’t take no for an answer but eventually again we stopped talking. so april rolls around and he messages me again. he’s probably jealous cus i was back with all our group of friends again including my crush, and we were all having a good time putting on a musical (i went back to help direct the show after graduating) and my friend clearly has major fomo. but he messaged me on FB asking if he could text me cus he missed me, and yknow THE POLITE THING IS TO JUST SAY I MISS HIM TOO so i said that and he goes ‘no you don’t, but okay...’ and proceeds to text me. WHY BOTHER TEXTING ME IF U THINK I DON’T MISS YOU THEN? jesus fucking christ. so he texts me and i jokingly said it was will smith (don’t ask.... it’s an inside joke and to try and keep it lighthearted i brought it up thinking he’d joke around cus yknow... EVERYTHING IS ‘JUST A JOKE’ TO HIM) and then goes ‘oh i thought i was talking to the girl of my dreams.’ there he goes again bringing it up how much he’s in love with me, he even told me he has dreams of me all the time and was wondering if i had dreams of him too... i was clearly weirded out at this point and just responded sarcastically because WTF. and then he gets mad like “i’m done. i don’t wanna play games anymore but everything is a joke with you ( !!!! are u fucking kidding me my guy), i really do think about you all the time and miss our friendship but you don’t need me anymore, i dream about you all the time, i miss what we had, i’m really sorry.” ????????????????? BITCH. WHAT. THE FLYING. MOTHER FUCKING. FUCK. !!! ???! !!?! !??!?!?!?! he really wanted to accuse ME of playing games all the time? like are u serious..... EVERYTHING’S A JOKE TO ME??? BC EVERY TIME I ASK U IF UR BEING SERIOUS ABOUT SOMETHING UR THE ONE WHO SAYS IT’S JUST A JOKE. i obviously went off on him at that point bc what the fuck ! ur the one who constantly tells me i’m a bad friend yet u still try and talk to me, if i’m such a bad friend then leave me alone! u constantly put me in awkward uncomfy situations that i put up with bc i thought you’d say i was a shitty friend if i didn’t, ur the ONE THAT’S A SHITTY FRIEND. after that we didn’t talk for about a month til his birthday when i texted him cus what’s the big deal, he wished me luck on the musical. casual. whatever. fine. then after that he started texting me again but i would just ignore it bc i really did not want to deal with that shit again, also i thought he was done with me. eventually i caved and said hi back cus i mean, i felt like a bitch ignoring him and eventually he was like ‘we should hang.....’ and i knew were the convo was gonna go so i’ll admit it. i ghosted. which is something i HATE having done to me and i hate doing it to others but why would i put myself through this bullshit again? this was in june or july. it’s september now and for about a month he would text me EVERY TWO WEEKS saying ‘steph?’ or ‘???’ or “hello...” bro TAKE THE FUCKING HINT. I DON’T WANNA TALK TO YOU. he texted me for the first time in a while yesterday and again i didn’t respond... so he messaged me on FB saying “why won’t you talk to me and text me back?” OH. SO SOMEONE YOU REALLY LIKED AND CARED ABOUT ISN’T TEXTING YOU, YOU SAY? JUST GET OVER IT! MOVE ON! IS IT REALLY A BIG DEAL? NOT SO SIMPLE IS IT WHEN YOU CARE ABOUT SOMEONE RIGHT? Right exactly, karma is a fucking bitch I hope you know how it feels now you fucking asshole. i am NEVER one for revenge and i’m not even doing this to be spiteful because really, the reason i’m not texting back is because he is a manipulative, jealous, obsessed and possessive fucking child, but it’s pretty funny how when i was dealing with someone not talking to me, he told me to just get over it and move on. yet there are dozens of ignored messages from him on my phone, where he CLEARLY isn’t over me not talking to him. maybe i owe him an explanation, sure, but why the fuck should i? just to be yelled at by someone who i really don’t want anything to do with anymore? yeah no thanks. it’s just amazing to me how he can still be so fucking obsessed all this time later. at least when someone is obviously done with me i back off and can realize when it’s over and not be a desperate bitch constantly texting them even when they ignore me 7 times. i’m not delusional i know when done is done. BUT THIS GUY. NOPE. HE STILL REALLY IS WONDERING WHY I WON’T TALK TO HIM. you know why, you dickbag. sometimes friendships just don’t work out and that’s okay, it doesn’t need to get to this point though. and the funny part? i’m apparently not even the only girl he’s done this to... the sweet talking and ‘oh but I’M your favorite right? cus you’re my favorite.’ and ‘we should hang out, like all the time, bc that’s what best friends do...’ yeah he’s pulled that shit with 4 OF MY FRIENDS. you think that shits not gonna get around buddy? he obviously has issues. it’s sad and yknow i don’t usually have problems with people, i can count on ONE HAND the amount of people i’ve had a falling out with or a negative relationship with... and i’m not one to expose people or whatever, that’s not my thing. but when you piss me off THIS much, well, sucks to suck. 

it’s been over a year, stop fucking texting me. lose my number, loser.