#Shnitzle

[the-great-unikitty]

[quadal-the-qrabs-quool-blogarino]

Holy shnitzle I’m doin a tumblr

[onmymasa22]

Do these guys exist? The giys who will make sure im ok because thats the way they care about me. What i was told:

Jack tells nikki that i screwed with yaakov

Me: no i didnt, i dont sleep with guys

Them: do u sleep with girls? R u a lesbian?

Me: no, i dont sleep with anyone, not until im married

Them: So ur a virgin

Me: yah

Nikki: good for you

Thank u

Jack: but obviously by your own choice

Me: yah of course

Today was cool, lots of compliments. I guess guys were wasted today. I was at yaakovs and jacks and nikki and binny was there.

I like it when i tell a guy im a virgin and he's like, obviously from your choice. I was like oh yah!

Or them being shocked that im a virgin.

Something I took out of yom hazikaron this year at har hertzl with JSC: you need to just keep dancing. Dont let anything stop you from being you. I come from a family thats really small.

I feel like my life started at 18. I was done being religious, inwanted to get out of chicago and and everything that i knew. I was ready to kust live a normal life, the life of the people at the reform school my mom worked at. I had a hard time in highschool. I was too emotional, too sensitive, too shy, too lonely. I knew my life wluld get better after somehow. So insigned up to go work at a camp in California, where i knew noone and nothing there. My first flight alone. The first three week i didnt like. Then the camp closed because of a salmonella outbreak. They semt all of us who were working for another month to live at houses of bnei akiva people in la. I remember waking up, feeling totally out of control, wanting to connect with people but not knowing how, they set up for a few of us to go to santa monica. I was terrified of everything. I looked at myself in the mirror, pointed at myself and said today you are saying everything that pops into your head. No matter if your voice shakes. No matter if your voice shakes, or you giggle from anxiety. You are being the biggest version of yourself tofay. And i was. And i made friends. And people thought i was funny. The next fhree weeks i had a blast living with my best friends a d having food premade for me. Itnwas me and another two girls and two or three guys. We hung out with eachother everyday. I had my first crush on a guy and we went to disney land together. I ended up staying wjth the girls and guys a week agter camp ended in LA. Disney land, the beach, sushi, movies, thrift shops. I cried at the end cuz i didnt know how to sustain the connection with all of them. There was one girl at the camp who i didnt know that well, shed follow me around and they put me with her for all the shmira jobs. She didnt really speak english and and i didnt really like her cuz we both liked the same guy but she said that if i was ever in israel, im invoted to yad binyamin. So i decided i wanted to go to israel. I learned graphic design at the time. I wanted to go on taglit, so i signed up, got waitlisted, emailed chabad to see if they had spots, they had one for three weeks away, i said ill take it and i was excited. I talked to the gorl yahel and asked her if she was swrious and she was. I wanted to actually see who she was cuz i really didnt know her. I met soldiers on taglit. They took us to caesaria and gave us shnitzl sandwiches with chips inside. I loved it. I danced in tel aviv מאמי חזרתי הביתה! איפה את?

אני מתחבאת

יש לי הפתעה בשבילך, איפה את?

אני מתחבאת

קניתי לך את העגילים האלו מזהב שרצית, איפה את?!

אני מתחבאת... כאן בסלון

לבן שלי שלדון, הבחור, הילד היפה, שעשה לי גאה בו כל החיים, והשיננית הכי טוב בארצות הברית אני נותן בלי צורך לשלם מס מיליון דולר.

כולם: ואו איזה איש!

לבת שלי ג'יין עם י פעמים, שתמיד קיבלה ציונים גבוהים ועזרה לאמא לשתוף כלים כשלא היה מספיק כסף להביא עוזרת, שקיבלת מלגת הצטיינות באוניברסיטה, ואישה בררנית מדי כי אם לא היא הייתה נשואה עכשיו כבר. לבת שלי גיין עם י פעמיים, אני נותן בלי צורך לשלם מס מיליון דולר.

ואו מזל טוב!

לאישה היפה שלי, חברה שלי , אהבת חיי, למרים האהובה, אני נותן בשמחה כל מה לא בשמך כבר, ו2 מיליון דולר במזומן. תהני ממשוש תהני

כולם: מלאך, לא איש, מלאך!

את מתקשרת ל-"בן שלך הרופא"

הוא שואל מה שלומך

את עונה לו

הוא שולך לך בדואר קבלה ל50 דולר.

את מתקשרת ל-"בן שלך האורך דין"

הוא שואל מה שלומך, ואת לא נשמע בטוב.

את שואלת אותו אם אח שלו הרופא יכול לעשות ככה והוא עונה שכן ושולח לך קבלה בדואר 100 דולר.

יא שלעמזל, תשלם 150 דולר לצדקה ב"זכות" הילדים הכלכך חכמים שלך

את פותחת מסעדה סינית. אבל לא בשכונה של היהודים. העסקה נכשלת. איבדת 1000 שק.

I am human

I found a ring on the floor outside a few weeks ago. I wore it today. My friend said, oh my gosh, that's exactly like a ring I lost.

What i should have said: its probably yours then. I should have explained what happened, taken it off, and given it to her right then.

But I felt too uncomfortable with the situation and i just said wow, really interesting.

And later, I texted her just so i couldnt get out of it saying this whole story of being outside with a flashlight and seeing it sparkle, trying also to use short sentences so as not to overshare.

I wish I were brave enough to not feel like I need to lie. I wish i said "you know earlier when you told me about your ring, i was too embarrassed to tell you that i took it and i wasn't sure yet if I was strong enough to give it back to you. But its yours and i really do want to return this object now that i know who it belongs to."

My wedding

I want the dress to hit tea cup length. I want everyone to get bubbles. I want pink sparkly sneakers. A dfeamy long veil. Long hair

Look, im not judging you, im not spreading drama, im trying to forgive u in my heart. You were drunk and angry friday night and gave me a lot of crap, and i dont take crap from anybody. So either grow up don't be drunk around me, or be drunk and stay away from me. That's it, no drama, point blank. I think some people can be drunk and be fine around girls... ur just not one of those people. So just so you know, when you drink, you can be insulting, don't understand when to stop, and have a really foul mouth. Now you get to make your choices.You work in the garment industry. You take a business trip, and you take your pretty secretary along. You now have a new line. Its called paternity suit. Pay 2000 dollar doctor bill.

On the way to work as a department store santa, you are held up and all your clothes are stolen. You are arrested for being a nudenik. Pay 500 dollar fine.

I want to marry a guy like shulem. A guy who always has stuff to tell me that he learned. But i stfuggle with a lot of things. I struggle with tznius mostly right now. Tznius and shomer negiya.

Im crying already thinking of the day that ill lose my parents. In the past few years, different things have been hard for me. For no good reason other than halachos. I try my best to be a good person. I make mistakes but i dont feel the struggle and the failure. I feel the failure feeling with tznius and shomer negiah. I saw him on a date

She looked normal

Normal, religious, nice

I want him to be happy

But like i wosh it was with me

Why cant someone want me whos normal

Why do the normal girls get the guy

Its just a crush

It just makes me want to be ok

I want to be ok

U will find him

U will be ok

Its so nice to be alome here

No worries

No one bugging me

I can just be

You open a chinese restaurant. Its not a jewish neighborhood. Business fails. You lose 1000 dollars

U kknow my issue. I dont know what todo with myself.i have such a strong yetzer hara im failing to it. It just feels stronger than ne. I jjst want to be ok. Im losing tk it and im losing hope. Am i dkjng the right thing? Am i not? How do i make the descision?

[oddlysatisfyingbot]

Bookmarks made from recycled materials at home via r/oddlysatisfying

[stephantom]

songs that begin with S?

Street Spirit (Fade Out) - Radiohead

Suburban War - Arcade Fire

Summertime Clothes - Animal Collective

Starbreaker - Judas Priest

Someone You’d Admire - Fleet Foxes

“S” turned out to be very difficult, so I have a million runners up behind the cut if you’re curious.

Runners up in no particular order:

Subterranean Homesick Alien - Radiohead

Shnitzled in the Negev - Shpongled

Swords and Tequila - Riot

Shine on You Crazy Diamond (parts 6-9) - Pink Floyd

The Sentinel - Judas Priest

Sprawl I (Flatland) - Arcade Fire

The Suburbs - Arcade Fire

Strawberry Fields Forever - The Beatles

Sunflower - Post Malone & Swae Lee

Sweet adeline - Elliott Smith

Speed Trials - Elliott Smith

Stained Class - Judas Priest

Strange Gateways Beckon - Tribulation

Stand By Him - Ghost

Sorcerer’s Pledge - Candlemass

Soldier Side - SOAD

Slow Motion - Panda Bear

Slide - Goo Goo Dolls

Sinner - Judas Priest

The Shrine / An Argument - Fleet Foxes

Schism - Tool

Script for my Requiem - Blind Guardian

Sadly Sings Destiny - Blind Guardian

Same Ole Road - Dredg

[thiseprsonoded]

2000 dead on nine eleven? How about he did a nine eleven a day... usa military man on reserve duty at home literally his moms home. and you was naan the wiser weiner shnitzle

[monbebe-twins]

Wonho truly does not give a shnitzle about Monbebes cardiac well-being. He needs to calm down. He needs to let us live and breath so we can support him and the rest of our favorite boy group properly and effectively

Agreed! He knows exactly what he’s doing to us. Boy needs to chill! 😩 I forget how to breathe every time he decides to surprise us with these kinds of pics. Send help 🥵

[pkmnfusionprof]

Carnivine + Miltank? (i hated these 2 back when i first started pokemon, cuz of whitney's miltank and a wild lvl 82 carnivine during a randomized nuzlocke game of mine who knew scary face, and was smart enough to use it every time i brought a pokemon out, it would then use Attract then Confuse Ray then Tackle the shnitzle out of my pokemon, the highest i had at the time was a lvl 19 Lugia that got one shot thx to a crit.)

Milivine: The Milk Weed PokemonThis is actually the most disgusting fusion I’ve ever made.

[kshlomo]

So here's the idea: shnitzle sandwich on spicy garlic bread. Drizzled olive oil on sourdough, sprinkle paprika, lather some minced garlic, and brush some charif lastly to mix it evenly. Man the battle stations : massage the cabbage in oil salt and lemon, toss the Israeli salad (didn't see any red onions to shave), bake the mixed veggies (zucchini, onions, carrots, bell peppers in tomato paste), sauté the onions jalapeños and mushrooms, deepfry the shnitz, and grill the bread. It may look like a lot, but most of the spicy garlic mix will get burnt off. Sauté using amba. While I tilt the pan back to drain the oil out, I slice the shnitzl to check for pinkness. Top the shnitz with techina, strew some cilantro about, shower the salad with lemon, and sleeve the sandwich in a bag for portability and convience. 👨🏻‍🍳😘🤌🏻 (at San Francisco, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CW4B7jsPL7G/?utm_medium=tumblr

[stuffthatireblog]

NEXT WEEK HOLY SHNITZLE

Hello Eret!! do you have merch? if not are you planning on making some?

YES!!! SOON!!! I AM SO EXCITED!!!

MERCH LAUNCHING NEXT WEEK!!! (don't have a set date yet)

I CAN'T WAIT FOR YOU GUYS TO SEE THE DESIGNS! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Also I'm told that if you order them before December 5th, they should arrive before Christmas which is amazing!

[slurrey]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Mike V (Vancouver BC) 🇨🇦🇬🇷 (@uon.visuals)

My latest animation, also built out of square curve L-system code in Cinema 4d! Spent a little more time on this one than usual, I think it shows :) Music: @shponglemusic - Shnitzled in the Negev Buy this as a resolume VJ loop with alpha: https://gum.co/QFded (at Surrey, British Columbia)

[refractment]

Shimmer's a little shnitzle

MOST ATTRACTIVE MUSE | NOT ACCEPTING

“I don’t know what that is, but it sounds exotic, so thanks!”

[idkwhatsgoingonheck]

“OH SHNITZLE”

[raziel941994]

Day 4. No matter where we go, the wild west follows. Chicken shnitzle is better than the beef one I had, and the lamb that Mark had was better still. And yes, I'm sure we got all this at an American wild west themed bar #cultureshock (at The Ranch Bar and Grill)

[onlyjellyillputinmybelly]

HOLY SHNITZLE THIS IS BEAUTIFUL

The context for the post is here, for those who didn’t see it. I’d like to thank everyone who helped spread the word and everyone who followed her and sent her nice messages. My friend got so many kind messages that helped her feel so much better and she posted her drawing!!!!

Thanks especially to @xionical @ironwoman359 and @paperghastly for agreeing to signal boost the post and really helping it spread.

My friend decided to let me post her art over here for those of you who dont have an instagram account. She might potentially get herself a tumblr account soon, so watch out for that! I’m tagging the people I saw mention they didn’t have an account. @cktkat @spirits-in-my-thoughts @remusthedukeofdeoderant

Again, all credit to my friend munchkin_witch, go follow her if you can!

[williampapsmear]

O Fuhrer! Mein Fuhrer!

O Fuhrer! mein Fuhrer! soon the world will speak kraut, The swastika has been defended, the final solution has been carried out! Our time is nigh, Arbeit Macht Frei, the aryans all elated, While follow eyes the trail of smoke from the crematorium so celebrated;                    But O heil! Heil! HEIL!                      O the rabid mouth of foam                        Where on the bunker floor my fuhrer lies.                          A cap busted in his dome.

O Fuhrer! mein Fuhrer! rise up and show us mensch how thee are hung; Rise up--for you le spikey windmill is flung-- for you the Lied is sung. For you I raise mein arm in a happy salute C: For you a load I will shoot OWO                     HEIL HITLER! DER VATER!                        Protector of race and home!                          Very unfortunate that                             He ended up with a bullet in the dome..

Mein Fuhrer is entering rigor mortis, his tender lips are still and cold. Mein Vater won't mind if I get one last taste. Mein shnitzle grows tenfold. Our time is nigh, Fuhrer ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I've got all night and you've got forever. "From fearful trip the victor ship comes in" however...                     Tis' a shame you died, Adolf-Kun                        But theres one thing I want to ram home                           my dick                             You shot yourself in the dome. <3