#She...........

[corndog-patrol]

[citroncynique]

okay but what if we all made melusinesonas

[l1tterae]

𝙳𝙸𝙰𝙽𝙰  𝙼𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙴  𝚅𝙸𝚂𝚄𝙰𝙻  𝙴𝙳𝙸𝚃𝚂.   mutuals  may  interact,  personals,  do  not  reblog.

[sabrebash]

The Ballad of Bella Buttons (based on a true story)

[everythingwasnormalhere]

pls rb if you think cuddling doesn't have to be s3xual

im tryna prove a point to my bf's mother help me out

[pirateprincessjess]

When I was a kid my family pretended to get raptured so I would think I was left behind on earth while they all went to heaven.

I was like 8 years old and my sister and mom had gotten really into the Left Behind novels (bible fan fic about the rapture). In the books when the rapture happened the clothes that people were wearing when they got raptured were left behind in neatly folded piles.

One day when I was getting home from school my family decided that they would leave piles of neatly folded clothes around the house, and then hide in the basement.

The intended effect was that I would get home and see the clothes then, think that my family had been raptured and that I wasn’t good enough to get into heaven… or something?

The problem was that I had never read these books, and didn’t really think about the rapture very often. There was no reason that I would see some laundry on the floor and think “The rapture happened and I’ve been abandoned by God! I’ll never see my family again!! Oh nooo!!!!”

I just sat down and watched cartoons and eventually my family got bored and revealed that they were all hiding in the basement.

It’s a good thing I didn’t understand the joke, otherwise that shit would have been traumatic.

[liquidstar]

i always think abt my cousin in greece who's like obsessed with american culture, bc ill say that im going to a barbecue and she'll be like "wow.... a real life american barbecue... will there be red cups?" you bet your ass there'll be red cups. take my hand. have a hot dog. all your dreams can come true here at the real life american barbecue

[clandestinegardenias]

My therapist just told me my problem is that I need to write more fanfiction.

[cordspaghetti]

really factual recounting with no embellishments whatsoever

[jewfrogs]

the problem with autism is sometimes you want to do something (brave) but you need someone to gently walk you through each step so you know what will happen. and people don’t like doing that

[beaft]

my mum forbade me to say anything to my dad about the top surgery thing, and it's just hit me how funny it would be if i got it done and didn't tell him and just waited for him to notice. i mean, what's he gonna say? "didn't you used to have tits?"

[temporalteardrop]

bass makes a dollar. i make a dime. that's why i think about lesbian sex on company time

[door]

agatha agate has a little spot on the top of her head where her fur is white and it’s very thin and the pink of her skin is a little bit visible all the time. turns out she can get sunburnt there

so now she has this stupid hat.

[cartoonsinthemorning]

It's Not Easy Being Marcille

[opiumvampire]

fuck w me

[disableddyke]