#She is literally me. just. it hurts so good
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wanderingwinds333 · 2 days ago
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My Sweetheart, Your Nightmare.
Pairing: Azriel X Reader
Summary: Having noticed that Elain clings to Azriel, Feyre mentions she thinks Azriel and Elain would be good together. Questions why the mother didn’t make them mates. Rhysand quickly lets her in on an important piece of information.
���‘Why not make them mates?” Feyre states as she witnesses her sister and Azriel down in the garden.
Rhysands eyes widen at his mates brazen comment and goes to interject but before he can she continues on.
“They look perfectly matched do they not? Two beautiful and caring people. Three sisters for three brothers just make sense?” Feyre says sounding upset.
“Feyre darling. It appears I’ve left out some pretty important information about this family. It’s my fault really, she’s been out doing my messy work for the night court this whole time. Keeping all the other threats at bay and …immobilizing them so Azriel has less work on his plate.” Rhysand rambles.
“What? I’m not following Rhys?” Feyre questions.
Rhysand sighs but goes to explain further.
“Azriel is only doing as I have asked in looking after Elain. He already has a mate Feyre. One he is very committed to. A female that you most certainly never want to hear the words you just spoke about your sister and him. She- “ a throat clears from behind them.
“SHE, is right here Rhysand.” A sultry voice states.
Rhysands eyes widen in what Feyre can only see as fear.
“Y/N! You are home! Oh Azriel is going to be thrilled, let me just go get him for you.” Rhysand quickly goes to grab Feyre and tries to leave but y/n has other plans.
Magic surges across the room and Feyres feet feel stuck to the floor. She turns her head to look at Rhysand and notices he is in the same predicament.
“Dammit” Rhysand whispers more to himself.
“Ah ah ah, Rhysie. That’s no way to greet your favorite sister in law. You haven’t even introduced me to your mate yet.”
Feyre turns to actually get a good look at the female that has somehow over powered the High Lord and Lady of the Night Court.
Ashen white hair, icy eyes, taller than most fae females, and she has a beautiful silhouette that filled out a pair of black leathers quite nicely, Feyre thought. Cauldron boil her, this female was gorgeous.
Before Feyre could find anymore of your perfections Rhysand interrupted her train of thoughts.
“Think less loudly Feyre Darling, I’m starting to become jealous.” Rhysand deadpans.
Feyre blushes and immediately looks down to her feet.
“You know I have that affect on most fae Rhysie. Don’t be a sour puss.” Y/n smugly states.
Y/n descends upon them and actually goes to bow before Feyre.
“It is an honor to officially meet you my High Lady. My name is y/n, assassin of the Night Court. Mate and wife of Azriel.” Y/N proudly states.
“I-it’s lovely to finally meet you y/n.” Feyre stutters out.
This female infront of Feyre is terrifying and ethereal. Feyre already knows she is lethal and all thoughts she had prior of how Elain and Azriel were perfectly matched go straight out the window. She can see it now…why the cauldron makes the pairings it does.
Y/N stands to her full height but all playfulness she exuded before is gone.
“I know you did not know of my existence until just now…so for that reason alone I’ll let your comments slide. But Azriel is MY mate and the saying ‘if I can’t have them, then no one can’ is very much the saying I live by when it comes to him.”
Feyre can only nod her head dumbfounded.
A second later shadows envelope the room. More lively than Feyre has ever seen them.
Azriel soon enters with a confused Elain in tow.
When Azriel lays his eyes on y/n, Feyre can quite literally see the tension leave his body.
“Sweetheart.” Azriel speaks so softly. He rushes to y/n and envelopes her in a hug that looks like it would hurt.
“Hi love.” Y/n whispers back just as soft and leans her forehead against his.
It’s an intimate moment that everyone else in the room feel like they are intruding on.
But one moment the feared shadowsinger and his mate were there…and the next gone.
Rhysand releases a breath that he had been holding.
“Well that was y/n. She’s half high fae and half witch. The people of Prythian call her Nightmare because fae parents tell their children if you don’t behave she’ll come in the night while you are sleeping and take you to her dungeon. Which isn’t totally untrue…it’s just criminals and murderers that she takes to her dungeon. You won’t see her or Azriel again until maybe two or three months from now .” Rhysand states.
“What? Where will they be?” Elain finally speaks.
After witnessing all she just had she can’t say she’s not a bit disappointed. It was obvious what you were to Azriel.
“Oh they are going to pick up their children from Azriels mom’s cottage and spend the rest of their time at their home.” Rhysand throws out casually.
“THEY HAVE CHILDREN? Rhysand what else have you conveniently left out?!” Feyre berates.
“….well I think that’s it honestly. OH they have a pet wolf who is very protective of the children. Also my niece and nephews, they enjoy tormenting people in different ways than their parents…mental manipulation. Just lock your mind up real tight around them. God I love them and proud they are all daemati like me but they once convinced me I had a thing for Beron for over a week until y/n realized what they were doing and made them release my mind.” Rhysand annoyedly admits.
Elain and Feyre can only stare at him in shock. He simply shrugs his shoulders like it was normal and walks off.
Elain breaks the silence and turns to Feyre. “I think y/n is going to end up being best friends with Nesta.” the two break out in giggles and they honestly can’t wait to see that unfold.
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sweetpupii · 2 days ago
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tw: non-con, somno, fingering & cunnilingus ( r!receiving ), reader cries just a little, praising, overstimulation, abby being the sweetest girl ever ( pretty ironic ) | 1.6k words.
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having long nails is great.
they look cute, you can match them with your outfit and your makeup, you get some compliments, they're amazing at scratching and all that.
“wanna know what's frustrating though?” you start, mindlessly scrolling on your phone while abby looks at your new set of nails, her own unmanicured hand holding yours. “not to be, you know, nasty but I feel like I'm gonna slash my pussy open if I try to stick a finger in there the wrong way.”
only a low hum of agreement can be heard from the blonde as she leans back against the couch of your shared apartment, tracing the design that's beautifully decorating the nail on your middle finger. yeah, that looks like it would hurt real bad.
“then get a toy. there is more stuff you can use.”
“of course I know that, but I don't have time either. at this point I feel like a nun!” a ( kinda whiny ) sigh escaping your lips at the mere thought of all the weeks spent unsatisfied. coming home late and tired didn't give you much time to even grab a toy like abby suggested.
but luckily, you have a very thoughtful roommate!
this woman would do anything—and I mean anything—to see you happy because that's what friends are for. helping and supporting each other during tough times and, let me tell you, being sexually frustrated definitely counts as one.
“abby? what the fu—mhggm” her hand quickly went over your mouth to stop your protests to get louder and more panicked while the other worked to keep your legs and arms from pushing her face away. why are you acting so surprised to see her in between your legs when she's just trying to help? it's not like you would be able to push her away but jeez, didn't expect such an ungrateful response.
yes, she woke you up by making out with your pussy but you were basically asking for it earlier.
“gonna make you feel good.” she promised before she kept lapping at your cunt like a starved woman. slurping you up like you're her favorite dish. feeling the vibration of your desperate, muffled sounds against her palm made her speak again. “shh, I won't hurt you.”
taking off your underwear while you sleep, holding you down, forcing your mouth shut and your legs open doesn't hurt! not if you stay still, at least.
her plan was simple.
if she made you feel good by eating you out, using her own fingers to reach places you currently couldn't ( and probably have never been able to ) reach while you slept then you would surely wake up in a good mood and thank her with that precious smile of yours and maybe even a kiss.
but noooo, you decided to wake up in the middle of it and panic. ugh, just when your body was responding so well to her touch. she had seen the way your cunt was glistening when she started to slowly kiss it. the moonlight slipping through your curtains making the sight even prettier, and she'll be lying if she said the thought of taking a picture didn't cross her mind.
but a little crying from you won't stop her, even if she feels the hot tears against her skin.
she's still holding your legs open so she can continue to suck and lick at your clit, tongue tracing each fold and sensitive bit. your hips bucking into her face—but she's not sure if you're liking it and want more or you're trying to push her away.
“don't scream, okay baby?” she whispered against the soft skin on your inner thigh, peppering small kisses, while looking up at your watery eyes, “I'll be so gentle. trust me.”
actually, what other choice do you have? this woman can literally bench press 205 lbs. you get on her bad side and a single smack takes you back to your mother's womb. she has a mean right hook too, those punching bags stand no chance.
but again, it's abby who we're talking about.
the blondie that cuddles you to sleep anytime your bed feels too cold, who makes stupid jokes to cheer you up even if she cringes so fucking hard immediately after, who lets you try to count every freckle on her skin without even asking why, who can listen to you talk for hours and pay attention to every word, the one that drunkenly tells you how glad she is that you're her roommate and friend while kissing your shoulder even if deep down she wishes for more than that and stares at you as if you are the most important thing in the world—because to her you truly are.
so maybe she really just wants to make you feel good...
the second the fear and confusion in your eyes turns into something more calm, seeing the slow nod of your head, the small hiccup and your legs no longer struggling, she pulls her hand away from your mouth to trace the other set of lips, gathering the mixture of her saliva and your fluids on her fingertips before gently pushing one inside. “there we go…nice and slow.”
she might've been wrong for not asking first but how was she supposed to resist the feeling of your warm, tight walls squeezing her fingers just right as she curls them inside. soaking her knuckles in a shiny coat of stickiness that makes her want to dive in face first again and taste it until it becomes the only flavor she'll ever remember.
once she's sure that you're wet and comfortable enough, another thick digit slides in, the stretch earning a moan from you that has abby feeling like angels are singing and welcoming her to heaven. god, she has waited for so long to hear those sounds out of your lips—sounds caused by her, not your vibrator nor whoever you used to invite over thinking you two were quiet. ( she could hear you every.single.time… and honestly? it was so good to get a free show. )
even if her pace was somewhat slow, the thrusts of her fingers still managed to produce soft, wet noises that filled the room as they combined with your heavy breathing.
“told you I'd be gentle.” she cooed against your abdomen, trailing her kisses up your torso until she finally reached your lips. the same lips she has been dreaming of kissing since she moved in, since she first saw you smile, since you finally laughed at something she said, since the first time she saw them in a pretty shade of lipgloss. it's better than she ever imagined and she knows she'll ask ( beg ) for more from now on.
she's head over heels if you couldn't tell already.
“a warning would've been nice.” your quiet words bring a sheepish smile to abby’s face as she sighs, pulling her face away just a little, “sorry, you looked so stressed lately, I figured you wouldn't mind…”
abby aims to please even if she doesn't realize how bad her impulsive thoughts are before she acts on them. but look at the bright side; from now on you have a girl who's willing to drop to her knees and bury her face between your thighs at your own home almost 24/7!
after a bit, she starts to notice that the clenching and throbbing around her fingers gets more frequent and your moans louder, meaning she can finally speed up the pace. burying herself deep into your cunt to reach all the perfect spots she knows you've been missing. “fuck, you're so pretty. I wish you could see yourself…dripping all over the bed.”
she’s breathless as if she was the one getting touched, her own underwear damp just from seeing and pleasing you. can you blame her? she feels like a child on christmas morning.
“that's it, doing so good.”
oh, how she adores the way your hips tremble underneath her. making a mess on your bed sheets as you throw your head back—which she takes as an invitation and buries her face there. inhaling your scent like it's the only thing keeping her alive, like you're the oxygen she needs.
“gonna come? I can barely move my fingers with how tight you are.” liar. no matter how much you squeeze she's pumping them in and out without a single bit of effort. working out daily really pays off in the most satisfying ways. plus, you're too wet and it slides in and out very easily.
and god, her words make the flutter in your lower belly even worse. your hand gripping at her forearm, nails digging so hard she takes it as “it's too much.” when in reality she had fucked you so dumb with her fingers that reaching for abby was purely out of instinct.
she can't even understand the words ( babbles ) coming out of your mouth, all her pussy-drunk mind is able to register is the whiny tone tone in your voice because yes, she's as fucked out as you are.
the loud cry that escaped your puffy lips while repeating her name over and over definitely woke up a neighbor or two and just the thought of it makes abby's ego go up to the roof. who's making the prettiest girl in the building come? abigail motherfucking anderson.
her fingers continue their movements, a bit sloppier than before, but they keep going nonetheless. thumb circling your sensitive clit to add more stimulation.
she shushed your whimpers with soft kisses on your your temple and held you still to keep the overstimulated jerking off hips from pushing her away.
“you can take a little more, you're a big girl.”
and she's an insatiable woman.
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masterlist ♡ taglist — @1ckyporcelainbunny @patronagrona
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mossangelll · 2 days ago
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good luck on your exams! would love to hear some vi or sevika yandere headcanons
thank you so much!! my exams are starting this week and i’m pretty nervous >.<
i won’t go into too much detail, so if you’d ever want smth more detailed just drop an ask and i’ll (eventually lol) get to it :3
Yandere!Vi
one of the more ‘sane’ yanderes
tries her best to avoid kidnapping you; whilst her feelings for you are anything but normal, she still wants to feel like she’s in a relatively normal relationship with you
charms the pants off you with no trouble at all
you genuinely wouldn’t know anything was wrong with her - she seems so put together
you say yes to being her partner and that’s when you notice how controlling she can be
vi is smart enough to make sure that her less desirable tendencies don’t show up until you’re deeply entrenched in the relationship
it’s all peaches and cream until she’s punching the wall next to your head because you dared to talk to that guy at the bar
then all of a sudden you’ve got a curfew and can’t go anywhere without her
and before you know it you’re trapped inside your house because “it’s not safe out there in the lanes”
makes you get a tattoo with her name over your heart (she does the same)
however, if you’re somehow not charmed by her, she decides to turn to more…unorthodox methods
hires a street gang to rough you up a little - not enough to seriously hurt you, no, vi could never do that to you; just enough to knock some much needed sense into you
i mean, how can you not like her back???
she swoops onto the scene to save you and ensures you’re caught in her snares
the happy ever after you both deserve <3
Yandere!Sevika
sevika is an interesting yandere
she probably comes off as more of a stundete at first - she’s not the most expressive when it comes to showing romantic affection like some of the other yanderes
she keeps tabs on you, a regular at the bar, all the time but you’re convinced she hates you and must think you untrustworthy
why else would you be on her radar?
in reality her checking up on you, making sure nobody tries to be funny with you is her way of showing interest
don’t get me wrong, she can make a nun blush with her flirting skills but she’s never felt so obsessed with anyone before and doesn’t know how to process it
it all comes to a head when she has a particularly rough day at work, a few bourbons deep and she decides to take you
quite literally hooks her arms around you and carries you over her shoulders
it doesn’t matter how much or how loud you scream, it’s hopeless
she’s so much stronger than you and onlookers that watch your struggle don’t even dare to move an inch - sevika has a fierce reputation and nobody would want to anger her
can be very threatening and acts that way often at the beginning of your captivity
scolds you often and when you go on a hunger strike she rolls her eyes and force feeds you herself
you don’t see this coming but she makes you kiss her cheek before she leaves every morning and when she comes back at night
she doesn’t care if you look like you’re on the brink of tears doing so, to sevika it’s only fair she gets this when she’s busy protecting you every day
has you help her clean her prosthetic arm in pure silence
her favourite part of the day/week <3
she may be angry but at the end of the day every cruel and calculated thing she does is for your sake
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ampheenix · 3 days ago
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What is this feeling, so sudden and new?
TAGS: Sonadow, 2k, post-Sonic 3, fluff & crack, that one trope where a character has a crush and thinks it's an illness lol
SUMMARY:
The surprise attack had taken Sonic completely off guard. He’d been wandering the old lab, gently placing a hand against the cracked glass of Shadow’s old containment pod, wondering just what had happened here…
Then out of nowhere, a gloved hand slammed Sonic against the tank, the impact rattling the glass behind him. A familiar thumb pressing painfully into his cheek, air knocked from his lungs, and the world seeming to narrow down to a single point- the weight and sheer strength of the hedgehog holding him in place.
That very moment was when the symptoms began.
Or, after Shadow survives the blast, Sonic finds himself saddled with strange symptoms. Heated cheeks, a racing heartbeat, dizziness…
There was only one possible explanation.
Sonic was allergic to him.
He had to be coming down with something.
Sonic was sure of it.
After miraculously saving the world, which was just a hair’s breadth away from total devastation, as per usual (with just a liiittle help from a certain ebony hedgehog), then going through the traumatic realization that the ebony hedgehog in question was dead after not surviving the blast, grieving for days only to come to the slightly less traumatic realization that no, he’s alive, he’s literally the Ultimate lifeform and crazy strong and why would you think he died in the first place-
Well. Needless to say, it had been… a lot.
But aside from the illness currently ailing Sonic, the aftermath of that whole incident had been surprisingly peaceful!
Tom had been healing up just fine, looking to make a full recovery (thank goodness), G.U.N had finally stopped trying to head-hunt them after they literally saved the world, and, well…
Shadow.
It had been quite the shock to everyone involved when the small, mournful eulogy they had been holding in honour of him was crashed by none other than the hedgehog himself. He did it all cool, too, walking in casually like it was just good ol’ regular game night and not, you know, his literal funeral.
He’d stopped in his tracks when he saw the tears welling up in Sonic’s eyes and the shocked expressions on everyone’s faces. “Did I… miss something? Why are you all so- oh. Right.” Shadow had realized, eyes widening.
Sonic had then barreled into him with all the grace of a falling piano, arms squeezing him tight and getting his fur wet with tears. He’d then jumped back, looking momentarily embarrassed as he scrubbed his arm across his face. “Where the hell have you been, Shadow?! We all thought you were dead, it’s been like- two weeks!”
“Vacationing.” Shadow had said dryly, only to get a hard punch to the shoulder. He’d moved his gaze to the blue hedgehog, confused. “That almost hurt.”
“This is no time for jokes, man!” Sonic had exclaimed, upset. Then he’d stopped, emotions temporarily on pause. “Wow. I never thought I’d be the one saying that.” Off to the side, Maddie couldn’t help herself as she let out a snort, exchanging a glance with Tom.
“But I wasn’t joking. I landed in New Mexico after the blast.” Shadow had stated, folding his arms. “I ended up paying Gabriella a visit while I was there, and she gave me a tour of the city.”
“Gabriella?!” Knuckles had thundered all of a sudden, racing over. His eyes were huge, looking at Shadow with uncharacteristic excitement. “You met her in the flesh? What was she like?!”
“Woah, Knucks, slow down a sec- who the hell is-” Then Sonic’s mouth dropped open, glancing from him to Knuckles and back again. Because there was only Gabriella he knew of that his brother would get this excited about.
“YOU WENT TO SEE THE GIRL FROM LA ULTIMA PASIÒN?!”
Everyone started laughing, and Shadow growled quietly, looking irritated. “Not intentionally. It was on the way, so I thought I’d stop by and remind her that she’s not a prize to be won. That she should be her own person.”
Sonic was full-body laughing now (though not unkindly) lifting a gloved hand to wipe a tear of mirth from his eye. “God, Shadow, you’re a riot! You do know they’re all actors, right?”
“I know that now.” Shadow had muttered, a bit embarrassed. It was almost cute, Sonic thought to himself absent-mindedly, the way he’d narrow his eyes and glance to the side, cheeks tinged with a hint of pink.
Then Shadow’s eyes had found the humans and their chortling, zeroing in on the tall man with his arm in a sling. Remembering the other reason he’d come (aside from seeing Sonic, of course), he inhaled, readying himself.
 He’d turned to the couple with his gaze on the ground, looking almost… guilty. “Tom?” He’d said softly, voice cutting through the light atmosphere in the room. Almost instantly, every eye was on them.
Tom stiffened, giving him a slightly suspicious look as he’d nursed his injured arm. He hadn’t really been wary of Shadow so far (mainly because Sonic had given them all the full story afterwards- considering the guy had helped saved the world, he hadn’t really held the injury against him. That and the fact that he was supposed to be dead.)
Shadow had winced at his rejection, almost imperceptibly so, but Maddie caught it. She had given her husband a gentle pat on his arm along with a smile. “Come on honey, hear him out.”
Tom had met her eyes for a moment, unsurprised- Maddie never did have the willpower to resist sad hedgehog eyes (and neither did he, to be fair.) Raising an eyebrow at her regardless, Tom turned towards him.. “Alright then… Shadow, was it?”
“Mmm.” Shadow had affirmed. Sonic and his brothers had watched them with curious eyes, wondering what was about to go down.
“I am… sorry, that you got hurt. It wasn’t my intention- I… I thought you were Commander Walters, the man who ordered for my imprisonment fifty years ago. But then the technology, the hologram- whatever it was, glitched out and it was only then that I realized my mistake. I apologize.” Shadow bowed his head.
Before anyone could say anything, he had lifted his head again, turned towards the door. “Thank you. Goodbye.”
In the blink of an eye, he was gone, leaving everyone gaping after him. Sonic had called his name over and over, frustrated that he had disappeared so quickly (he still had so many questions!!), but the hedgehog had disappeared.
Fast-forward to a week later, where Sonic was pacing across the floorboards of his bedroom, mind racing. He was sure of it- Shadow had infected him with something terrible.
First off, the hedgehog was living rent-free in his head, and it was weird.
He spotted a red thing next to a black thing? His thoughts immediately jumped to Shadow.
Noticed a kid gliding around on rollerskates? Shadow again.
And every night when he went out to gaze up at a sky of stars, he couldn’t help but think about the soft words they had exchanged, when he and Shadow had been watching the sun slowly rise over the Earth.
“A light shines, even though the star is gone.”
And it wasn’t just that, oh no!
Whenever Sonic remembered those times they’d spent together... He’d start feeling oddly dizzy and warm, his heart would start racing, he’d feel a weird fluttering in his stomach, and strangest of all…
 He’d feel the strange urge to bury his head in his hands and roll around on the floor.
The first time he’d noticed the symptoms was during the battle- the one just before Shadow had attempted to vaporize them all with a black hole. (But hey, forgive and forget, right?)
The surprise attack had taken Sonic completely off guard. He’d been wandering the old lab, gently placing a hand against the cracked glass of Shadow’s old containment pod, wondering just what had happened here…
Then out of nowhere, a gloved hand slammed Sonic against the tank, the impact rattling the glass behind him. A familiar thumb pressed painfully into his cheek, air knocked from his lungs, and the world seemed to narrow down to a single point- the weight and sheer strength of the hedgehog holding him in place.
Sonic found himself stunned, eyes widened and his senses overwhelmed. His nose had filled with Shadow’s unmistakable smoky scent, a mix of ozone and gunpowder and something faintly metallic. It was a scent Sonic recognized instantly, one tied to lost battles, bruised limbs and tense conversations, but he’d never smelled it up so close like this- it was sharp, intense and almost.. intoxicating.
Shadow had practically reeked of fury and frustration, even more so than usual- distracted by the strong scent and too shocked to even attempt escaping his rough grip, Sonic was reduced to useless putty in his hands as Shadow tugged his head back and hurled him against the wall.
But that adrenaline, that zing of energy that always came with a surprise attack- it still didn’t explain the peculiar warmth in his cheeks when Shadow had hissed directly into his ear, roughly pushing his head into the glass to the point where he couldn’t move (and Sonic was strong, so that was not an easy feat.)
Before he knew it, Sonic found himself rolling around on the floor again with his head buried in his gloves, letting out a high-pitched squeal. What was with him?!
Sonic could tell his family had noticed too… he’d been quieter than usual, too lost in thought to infect the house with his usual contagious grin and razor-sharp wit.
Tails kept shooting him furtive glances when he thought he wasn’t looking, Tom and Maddie had been having more and more whispered conversations late at night (Sonic had caught his name being muttered more than once), and heck, even Knuckles was feeling the weird vibes!
Knuckles! That was how you really knew something was wrong.
It didn’t help that Shadow still hadn’t shown his face in the week since his funeral, not even to say hi, which was just plain rude if you asked him! What kinda guy showed up at his own eulogy, claimed he was ‘vacationing,’ and then just… disappeared?
The mysterious illness… the symptoms only seemed to appear whenever Shadow was involved, so could it be that- wait, no, that was just silly.
But it made too much sense…  Sonic’s antsy pacing slowly petered to a stop as his eyes widened, his mind racing.
He had to be allergic to Shadow. That was the only possible explanation.
Sonic was sure of it. But, well, just to make sure-
“Tails!! Tails!!” Sonic raced down the stairs, taking them three at a time before skidding to a stop right next to his brother. Tails glanced up at him from where he was watching TV with Tom and Maddie. But where was- ah. Sonic’s ear twitched hearing Knuckles rustle around the kitchen- probably hunting about for grapes.
“Sonic?” Tails said, understandably confused. “What is it?”
“If you’re planning another adventure, I hope it can wait another five minutes.” Maddie smiled sensibly, sounding a bit sleepy from under the blankets where she was cuddling with Tom. “Bluey’s about to start.”
“Oh! Wait, really?” Sonic paused, indecisive. On one hand, he’d wanted to ask Tails to give him a quick medical checkup with his scanners. You know, just making sure he didn’t have some other strange disease- that would prove once and for all that his allergies were tied to Shadow, right?
“You should watch with us!” Tom smiled, patting the empty couch cushion next to him. “Though there isn’t much blanket left, thanks to Maddie…” He shook his head at her, bundled up in the fluffy blanket with a shameless grin.
But on the other hand… “Which episode is it?” Sonic asked pensively, this information vital towards his final decision. Chances were, it was one he’d seen a million times-
Tails grinned, knowing they’d won. “The 80s one.”
“Sold.” Sonic said instantly, and in the blink of an eye he was nestled on the couch with them. Hey, it was his favorite episode! Sometimes you just had to prioritize- he could investigate the allergies afterwards.
Knuckles re-entered the room from the kitchen, holding a large bowl of fresh green grapes (as Sonic had predicted). He then stopped in his tracks seeing the blue hedgehog on the couch, frowning. “Hedgehog, you stole my spot.”
“What can I say? You snooze, you lose!” Sonic grinned, sinking further into the couch cushions and making sure to get extra comfortable.
“I will not stand for this disrespect.” Without missing a beat, Knuckles walked over and easily lifted him up with one hand, other hand holding the bowl, before unceremoniously dumping him on the other side of the couch.
He then sat down to tuck into his grapes, sending Sonic a triumphant grin of victory as he did so. The others all snickered, Tails trying his best not to laugh as he gave his brother a consoling pat on the shoulder.
Sonic just rolled his eyes with a good-natured sigh, accepting his fate. Still, that didn’t mean he couldn’t be petty about it- he scrambled over everyone (getting some annoyed groans as he did so) in order to steal some grapes from the Echidna, swiping them quick as a flash before he was back on the other end of the couch.
He nibbled on them with relish, grinning at Knuckle’s sour expression. Hey, these were juicy! Yum.
Sonic settled in to watch TV with his family, and his mind definitely didn’t keep drifting back to Shadow, over and over again.
And that night, when he gazed up at the galaxies and stardust swirled across that inky expanse, he absolutely didn’t hear Shadow’s soft, gentle words echoing in the back of his mind. Nope. Not even once.
…Allergies were really the worst.
If you enjoyed, feel free to leave a kudos on ao3! <3
https://archiveofourown.org/works/62019349
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deeplyshalllow · 22 hours ago
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Glinda gets what she deserves at the end of Wicked
I don’t necessarily mean this in an all negative light either, Glinda’s ending is bittersweet – sad, but hopeful. But she does not deserve an all out happy ending at the end of the musical.
I don’t know if I’m gonna be crucified for this, but here goes.
Glinda in Act 2 is a key part of a fascist regime. She doesn’t just live in it, she isn’t forced to take part in it and she’s not working as a double agent (like Fiyero). She knows what they are doing to the Animals (which includes separating infants from their mothers and putting them in cages, and making Animals so afraid they literally forget how to speak), she knows and loves people it is hurting and yet she continues to actively promote it.
(I won’t point out the connections to real world situations, but I’m sure you guys can all think of examples and think of how you feel about people who are active participants in helping such regimes.)
We see she knows all this too. We see she excuses it for her ego and the power:
Glinda: Do you think I like to hear them say those awful things about her? I hate it!
Fiyero: Then what are we doing here? Let's go, let's get out of here!
Glinda: We can't leave now, not when people are looking to us to raise their spirits.
Fiyero: You can't leave, because you can't resist this. And that is the truth.
Glinda: Maybe I can't. Is that so wrong? Who could?
Elphaba: No, of course you never! You're too busy telling everyone how wonderful everything is!
Glinda: I'm a public figure, now. People expect me to...
Elphaba: Lie?
Glinda: Be encouraging!
And if one could possibly argue (weakly) that, given she’s not actually doing any of the regime’s actual violence, just keeping people’s hopes up she’s not as bad as those who are, she gets worse:
Morrible: Well, we'll just flush her out and force her to show herself.
Wizard: But how?
Glinda: Her sister
Morrible: What? What did she say?
Glinda: Use her sister. Spread a rumour. Make her think her sister is in trouble and she will fly to her side... and you'll have her.
Even if one argues that Glinda is somehow not clever enough to realise that they’ll end up killing Nessa, she sure as hell knows it will get Elphaba captured. And there’s no way that Elphaba being captured won’t lead to the execution of her best friend. Yes, she’s heartbroken, yes, she might not have said this when emotions weren’t running high, but it doesn’t make her terrible words less deadly (and bear in mind Elphaba hadn’t even done anything to hurt Glinda! It was Fiyero who chose to go with her).
Glinda only really starts realising what she has done in March of the Witch hunters, when Nessa is dead, Fiyero is tortured and presumed dead and Elphaba has descended into madness – all because of her own action. And, kudos to her, this is when she decides to change, she immediately goes to Elphaba and tries to warn her about the Witch Hunters, apologises and ultimately Elphaba trusts her with the Grimmorie and to continue her legacy (which she immediately does by overthrowing the Wizard). She has started down the track to good but she still has a long way to go.
I am not the first, nor will I be the last to point this out but “Goodness knows the wicked’s lives are lonely, goodness knows the wicked die alone”, sung by Glinda,is clearly not about Elphaba. Elphaba was not wicked, nor did she die alone (literally Dorothy was in the room and metaphorically Glinda supported and loved her). Glinda is singing about herself, Glinda knows she has been wicked, Glinda knows that it is her own actions that have lead to the “death” of her friends.
So what Glinda is left with is a chance to do good. A chance to live up to her name and make up for what she’s done. A chance to use what she’s most talented at, making people like her, to continue the legacy of her best friend. Despite everything, Elphaba does trust her, if she didn’t she wouldn’t have left her with this responsibility.
Glinda: Fellow Ozians, friends, we have been through a frightening time. There will be other times and other things that frighten us. But if you let me, I'd like to try to help. I'd like to try to be... Glinda the Good.
This is why she is going to “try” to be Glinda the Good, because she hasn’t been good yet. She has learnt a lot of very hard lessons through the narrative, been dragged kicking and screaming out of her selfishness, ego and giving into her worst impulses and is grateful for a chance to repent. And honestly, I’m sure she will suceed.
And one last thing:
Elphaba: I only wish...
Fiyero: What?
Elphaba: Glinda could know that we're alive.
Fiyero: She can't know, not if we want to be safe. No one can ever know.
I know a lot of people take ire with this line. But Fiyero, always the best strategist of the group, is right. The last time Glinda was trusted with important information it led to a death and two more people nearly dying. She has not earned that trust yet.
But, remember, Glinda isn’t stupid, Glinda is in a position where she’s going to have to think more and more. Glinda has presumably seen her roommate get wet before, she saw Fiyero’s reaction to the rumour, no matter how much searching happens Fiyero’s body never turns up, how long is it really going to take for her to connect the dots? Sure “Glinda can never know” for sure, but she sure as hell can be comforted by the fact she’s almost certain her best friend did not melt from a bucket of water.
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rhaeheartzsquirrelz · 10 hours ago
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Complaints
Sevika x Female Reader (Fluff)
Getting drunk and having your girlfriend take you home.
Contains: Intoxication, ass tapping. (literally nothing too sexual). Reader wears revealing clothes. (idk if that’s like, an ick?
Proofread || Note: So… I broke my phone :) hahhaaaaaaaaaaa 🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️ This is so rushed, im so sorry omg.
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Fourth drink down and you were beginning to feel tipsy. The loud music and the bright lights weren’t helping, and don’t get yourself started on the nagging laughter coming from the men sat beside you on the stools.
With a grimace, you turn to face the crowd of people; who were dancing to the upbeat music. They looked like they were having fun, unlike you. It had been half an hour since you unattached yourself from your girlfriend, who was now playing poker with a bunch of men, and went to grab a drink. As a lightweight, it never took much effort to get yourself drunk, so with only a few shots of tequila you were just that.
With your uncomfortably tight clothes, you stepped off the stool and made your way back to your muscular girlfriend. Sevika, who saw you coming, wrapped her mech hand around your hips the second you sat down. “Finally came back?” She smirked out, pulling the cigarillo from inbetween her dark lips. “You’re acting like I was gone for an hour..” hands on the edge of the table, fingers playing with the roughened wood, you lean your heavy head against her shoulder.
“In thirty minutes y’managed to get yourself drunk. Funny.” The woman scoffed, though there was no hint of bitterness in her tone. Instead, her words were full of fondness. You guessed she could smell the alcohol from you, must’ve been strong.
See, the main reason you’d stepped away from her was because she was being completely unreasonable— as you called it— your girlfriend had been complaining about your revealing outfit the second the two of you had entered The Last Drop. She’d even offered to lend you her, most prized, cape. Don’t get her wrong, she let you wear what you wanted, just not when you were trembling in the cold.
“Not funny.” With a roll of your eyes, you shift onto your girlfriend’s lap. It was definitely more comfortable, much more warmer too. Your mind was still trying to process a lot of things, so all you needed was a good place to relax. “In the middle of a game, love.” Sevika’s cool, metallic finger ran up and down your back, soothing your heated, tingling skin. “So?”— “So, you’re movin’ too much.” The woman gave your waist a squeeze and held you in place. “How much longer? I’ve been watching you play for like.. uhm, a good while now?” Your words slurred as you managed to speak. Your girlfriend took the hint and shook her head in slight disapproval. “Maybe y’shouldn’t of drank so much?” You, having a huge headache and clearly not in the mood, gave her a squeeze on her cheek. “Oh, yeah, poke your girlfriend’s cheek until she’s givin’ in.” This tactic had worked before, and you were confident in your attempt.
And, of course, you succeeded. Turns out, nagging in your girlfriend’s ear about the randomness things all the while squeezing her cheeks was the only way to pull her out of a game.
Sevika was forced to give up with a deep sigh before throwing her cards onto the table and walking you to your shared apartment; which wasn’t far. Arriving and locking the door behind the her, Sevika let out an exaggerated sigh. “Y’happy now?” Yeah, you were. “My head was hurting, not my fault.” Your migraine had lessened in time, thanks to the fresh air you’d gotten and the warmth from your girlfriend. “Hope you’re ready to be hung-over, baby.” “Yeah, I am. I’ll be fine with some medicine.” You follow Sevika into the bedroom before collapsing onto the bed, she followed suit and pulled you into her arms.
“Y’expect me to help your stubborn ass?” She gruffed in half-seriousness as she nuzzled into your neck. “Think we need to change you, I don’t understand why you didn’t wear something more.. functional..” of course Sevika disapproved of your outfit, she was the only one allowed to enjoy them; so to wear them outside the house would only rile her up. “This is functional, it’s pretty too!” A miniskirt with a laced top sure would get you a “lot of attention”, which you, sometimes, didn’t mind. “Pretty, sure. But, functional? Don’t think so, sweet thing.” Although it was hard to make quick movements in the fear of flashing someone, the outfit you wore was one of Sevika’s favourites, so you didn’t understand why she was complaining so much. “Will you just change me?”
It took Sevika a good while to figure out how to take off your complicated skirt. When she did, she gave your ass a pat before slipping you into some cozy pajamas. “Will you quit doin’ that?” You let your girlfriend carry you back into bed and she pulled you tightly against her muscular chest. “Y’like it, don’t lie.” The warmth of her breath mixed in with her sweet and metallic scent had you more relaxed than ever. Your mind had stopped spinning, your body just melted into her, and her touch had you more than content. You couldn’t feign the annoyance anymore.
“Maybe I do..”
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miwiheroes · 13 hours ago
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Dropping Byler Evidence Every Day Until Season 5
Day 5: Byler parallels with Jopper and Lumax
Decided to combine Jopper and Lumax into one post because a lot of them are similar and would actually be more compelling if they were all combined, being that Jopper and Lumax are definitely endgame (they arent in any love triangles or anything)
So again, I'm gonna name the parallel and how intentional it may be. Even if it's not fully intentional as a complete parallel, this still counts as evidence because using the same tropes for Lumax and Jopper as Byler means that they are all romantic.
1. I Lost You
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The fact that Byler and Lumax's ones are in the same episode oh my god???? I honestly think this is intentional. While the 'I thought I lost you' thing is common in romantic tropes, to use it for three couples is very much insane and they must have noticed this. Putting the two in the same episode as well..... oh my god
2. Holding Hands
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I think that the fact its a parallel is not intentional, but hand holding is just very very common as a romantic trope. It's also the truth that they actually create a separate SHOT for each of these moments too, to signify their importance.
3. A Team
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(couldnt find a good screenshot with a caption for byler but there is alt text)
If you want two people to have believable chemistry, you make them work together well. It was never explicitly stated that Jancy were a good team, but you could tell. HOWEVER THIS IS JUST EXPLICIT they are spelling it out for u!!! Mike and El never really work together. They are a couple. But they aren't a team. They don't work together on plans, there's never any back and forth planning (like with byler in s3), and once again, it's never ever acknowledged by either of them that they work well together as a team.
4. On the Bus
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Both heart-to-heart scenes use this song behind it:
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Oh this is highly highly intentional. You do not just use romantic, TENDER EMOTIONAL music for one couple who are definitely romantic, and then put that in the background of a platonic scene. The creators are literally screaming at u guys here <3 THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE ROMANTICCC HELLO
(also both these scenes end with them smiling at the other and they get interrupted by a noise before anything else can happen)
5. We have to kill it
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Sorry guys i totally forgot to include this one in the Jancy parallel post but literally fucking LOOK!! This is intentional to me because it is very specific, and if it's an accident that they all want to kill something and the other one agrees, then it still shows that these couples have chemistry because they are on the same page. AND one of them is reassuring the other, foreshadowing that they are gonna be a team in the next season.
Jancy are a team in season 2 after they have this convo in season 1, and Jopper are a team in season 3 after having this convo in season 2. So byler will be a team in season 5.
6. Staying in the Hospital
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Honestly this one's just cute, and recontextualises the fact that Mike peers over Will on the bed, and stays by him (even though it doesnt really need recontextualising). The fact that its very romantic and cute for Lumax to do it should mean the exact same thing for Mike to do it.
7. Looking longingly at someone who's pulling away
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erm this one is just so clear to me. Not exactly intentional but like- the thing with staring at someone longingly just to have them not look back at you is very slow burn romance. The fact that it's very obvious to ppl that Max is definitely aware of Lucas staring at her, but can't stare back because she's afraid to hurt him/ afraid to show her feelings again definitely parallels Mike too.
Also both Lucas and Max SIGH before going back to what they're doing...
8. TENDER EMOTIONAL MUSIC
so a tender emotional music scene for jopper makes it feel romantic:
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Sooooo.... doesn't that mean that it applies for byler too?? Who had it done to them not one, not two, but THREE TIMES IN SEASON 4???
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AND LUMAX HAS A SCENE WITH THIS TOO
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Thanks for reading yet another long ass post :))) The next ones probably going to be Rovickie parallels because they actually have so many after doing my research so yeah
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lucius-morningstar · 1 day ago
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Vaggie is not a bad girlfriend.
I know there are some Vaggie haters out there and don't get me wrong I understand why. But you're hating her for the wrong reasons. Her character wasn't completely fleshed out right in my opinion and I think that's why so many people hate her character. She's a dependent and honestly can you blame her? Her entire life was killing sinners under the guise of helping heaven. She leaned on other sisters who were said to be "just like her." She depended on them because they were the only family she knew. That WE know of. Imagine being so close to someone and you make a decision out of complete mercy for someone else. Someone you see as innocent and in doing that, you're severely punished and abandoned by people you considered family. I could even say Vaggie has a touch of Stockholm syndrome but Charlie doesn't do this intentionally. You basically took two broken girls who suffer from abandonment issues and expected them to be stable. Let's be real for a couple in hell with abandonment issues, Stockholm syndrome, dependency issues, ect and they actually do come off to be the most healthy if not for one obvious factor. Vaggie's hidden past. Now let me be clear, the Stockholm syndrome bit is obviously not intentionally. Charlie is just doing her best to be helpful and help her out and in doing that Vaggie had a deep dependency in her. So much so that being honest about her past put her into possibly sever panic attacks. I wouldn't be surprised if Vaggie had tried and would have mental break downs because of it. After all, the people she knew she could trust with everything saw her, heard her spare someone and their reaction was to rip everything from her and leave her for the worst fate possible. Could you picture what could have happened if Vox, Alastor or hell forbid Valentino found her instead of Charlie. Especially Alastor of all people, imagine someone with Vaggie's determination and loyalty behind Alastor's command. Instead she was shown true kindness in a place that was suppose to hurt her, where the place that was known for good and kindness hurt her beyond words. Yes, she fucked up. She hid a lie for almost four years. I can understand every reason both parties have for being afraid/hurt and betrayed in a sense. Vaggie despite being in the best place never truly mentally healed from her pain. Not until her meeting with Carmilla did she truly accept her actions and move on for it thus gaining her wings back. Yes you could say it was her desire to protect her girlfriend but I also believe it was an acceptance that her way wasn't going to help in the long run.
Vaggie did everything she could to try and make up for the wrong she did, her not telling Charlie wasn't just hiding but it was her own silent torture. She believed she deserved to be hated and the idea of Charlie loving her despite her actions was far more insane then redemption itself. So in not telling her, she tortured herself further. Believing she did not deserve to be forgiven and every loving gesture, gentle kiss, touch was another knife in her heart telling her she deserved none of it and her guilt was her punishment. Vaggie was in her own personal hell, in her eyes, being loved over a lie. Not being able to tell the truth despite wanting too, her guilt and self loathing pushing her deeper into a pit she couldn't get out of alone. So her response was to push herself out of her comfort zone for Charlie, for the one person who truly showed her true kindness and love no matter what would happen to Vaggie, she'd do anything if it meant Charlie was happy, if it meant she could be forgiven for what she viewed as HER sins. Vaggie is not a bad girlfriend, She literally went to someone who had been confirmed to have murdered an exorcist. The value of her life is so low to her and all she clearly cares about is Charlie getting what she needs. if anything she's bad at self love and she's slowly working her way to loving herself as much as she loves Charlie. That's where I feel her arc is going, being better for herself and for Charlie. Sorry for the rant. Feel free to add your own comments, I obviously forgot some things xD Just went off on a rant about this cause I honestly despise all the hate Vaggie gets, as a girlfriend and as a character.
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luv-beam · 12 hours ago
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IM BAAAACK!!! i was gonna save this as my bedtime story, but then i realized i can't stay up tonight 😭 but all the better for me bc i get to read this little masterpiece early 😌:
• when you don't just have a feeling that today isn't going to go well, but it's DESTINED not to go well... good lord time to panic! also the description of the dress is so pretty rah like the quiet dignity and refinement over opulence, rhe soft rustling of the skirts,, u can really feel the vibe of the family thru this and also the tension w the fact that yn feels everything BUT perfect
• WHISPERING THAT A LADY'S VIRTUE LIES IN RESTRAINT OHHHHHH U CANT DO THIS TO ME NOT WHEN YN LITERALLY IS LIKE RESTRAINING HERSELF FROM HER OWN DESIRES THIS WHOLE FIC U CANT
• fun fact but corsets were never meant to be suffocatingly tight; its kind of just a modern stereotype, but im not mentioning this to diss ur writing or anything !!! 😭😭 i think the tightness of the corset and yns lack of room to breathe is a really important symbol that lends to how she's really feeling. like the physical connecting to the emotional
• okay another comment abt ur imagery bc ur descriptions of the palace are utterly breathtaking 🤧 like White Room Syndrome is scared of u, tara
• i know whats gonna happen, but like the tension and suspense u create is enough to have anyone on the edge of their seats!! like u dont need future sight to be anxious abt what's gonna happen. like will yn get out of this scot-free or will something horrible happen?
• "you are a xu, do not falter" ugh all the pressure and expectations yn is burdening herself w just continue to distress and weigh her down further...
• GIVE THIS GIRL A HUG 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
• i hate that i like,,, get their mother's argument. like im on yn and hao's side fs but also... idk i think she just had sm going on and like mental struggles can be just as harmful as physical ones. im glad hao is so compassionate, and that her mother does have some sympathy for her daughter
• (but i know what comes next 😭😭😭😭😭)
• "a splendid display of athleticism" PLS IM GONNA SNORT SKFNDKFNFNF seokmin does have a knack for brightening the room :'))) even i was trying to mope w our mc, but then that line made me break lol
• HOPE CAN BE A SLIPPERY CREATURE YES WE KNOW .
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• TARA U WANT ME TO CRY DONT U (´Д⊂ヽ NOT IN THE WAY U LONG FOR?? THE CHASM BTWN UR FEELINGS AND HIS INDIFFERENCE???? EEEUUUGHHHH!!!
• i hate how supportive seok is being, like hope truly is a slippery creature. i feel like me and the mc both r getting strung along goddamn......
• love the details of the lady's tea and the garden party — great worldbuilding details to get me even more immersed
• AWWWH THE NEW DRESS, HER MAMA'S ADORATION FOR HER UGH 😭😭😭 i hate knowing the future. besides that, love the imagery of the dress like i can piece it together in my mind as if im sketching it out!! its so pretty :')) def befitting of a princess
• such a "slipping thru my fingers" moment 🤧🤧 like it's so starkly different from the time yn was getting ready for the debut presentation where she was just worried and freaking out; now she and her mom are /laughing/ and tho there r expectations, this will undoubtedly ease a couple of those worries
• oh the the anticipation is killing me — and then the ball is positively dismal >~<
• I WAS WAITING FOR SEOK TO FINALLY COME BY AND OFFER A DANCE LIKE UR YNS BESTIE COME HERE AND GIVE HER A HAND BY ASKING FOR HER HAND WINK WINK
• the mamas leading an army line is so funny lol and who said women cant fight??
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• BRUH i just speedran five different emotions like HOLY SHIT I LOVE SEOK > holy shit. does he love yn back? > holy shit this hurts > holy... shit... > oh fck. like the immediate realization that snaps into place when u out two and two together. i wanna say she's jumping to conclusions based on seok's initial surprise, but im also cynical like yn is being in this moment and yeah... idk
• OPEN HONEST DEVASTATING. TAKE A KNIFE THROUGH MY HEART ALREADY THE WAY THOSE THREE WORDS PUNCTURE MY CHEST
• the "how foolish of me" not only meant for the fact that she thought he'd gone into this w pure intentions, but also foolish of herself for believeing he actually wanted to dance w her, that she actually had a chance w him... oh i want to yeet myself off a cliff
• omg the argument btwn yn and hao... tensions were high, im afraid... like idk if chucking a shoe at his face was supposed to be funny but i feel yns fury and the angry tears like i know there were better ways to go abt this, but i am all for female rage!!!
• "the bitterness in ur chest is a wellspring of anguish" OHHHHHH 😭😭😭😭😭 oh 😭 like it's catching up to her now. also, just the fact that hope is so slippery and caused her to make her entire reputation crumble is just... someone give this girl a hug, she was not built for this
• YOU'VE TAKEN SOMETHING PRECIOUS FROM ME???? some might say its her dignity, her reputation, her agency,,,, but we all know what it really was... or who...... i love snarling female rage dialogue
• do u know the taylor swift "right where u left me"? yeah thats this whole next section 😭💔 baby just becomes a ghost who haunts the place she was abandoned and wronged
• THAT LAST LINE IS LIKE THE EXECUTIONER'S PULL ON THE PULLEY TO LET THE GUILLOTINE BLADE FLY. LIKE OH THE POWER OF A SINGLE LINE LIKE THAT
despite knowing what was gonna happen, it still hit so hard, or rather, EVEN HARDER this time 😭😭😭 like my mouth is pulled into a permanent frown skcnekfnjf IM SO SAD FOR HER LIKE I DONT MIND BEING A SPINSTER MYSELF, BUT THE EXPECTATIONS THAT COME W HER SOCIAL STATION WONT ALLOW HER TO BE 😭😭😭 she will forecer be haunted by her choises and foolishness and im so sad for her 😭😭😭 tara, u are a cruel (yet talented...) mistress 😭
i... will be back tmrw... 🥲👍
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The Somerset Affair | Chapter 2: When the Music Stops
pairing: lsk x fem!reader genre: Bridgerton AU, friends to (?????) to eventual lovers, brother’s best friend, SLOWWWW BURNNN chapter wc: 8.8k warnings: alcohol consumption, societal expectations, crying, mentions of a panic attack (not being able to breathe), eventual smut, more to be added a/n: sorry sorry i know ch 2 took forever // as always, ENORMOUS thanks to indi @wongyuseokie for this GORGEOUSSSS banner // and to my lovely betas shu @welcometomyoasis lou @tusswrites haneul @chanranghaeys this could not have happened without you // 3rd chapter will be up faster than this one i swear!!!
summary: when the music stops and everything goes wrong, will seokmin always be there to defend you?
comment to be tagged when chapters are posted, or join the fic taglist here!
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The morning of your debut should have been perfect. Every detail had been painstakingly planned over months, from the delicate lace of your gown to the pearls in your hair. But as you sit in front of your vanity, eyes bloodshot and heavy with fatigue, you know deep in your bones that this day is not destined to go smoothly.
You had stayed up the entire night, restless, thinking about Seokmin. Every word he had said, every smile, every fleeting touch that had seemed so innocent before now felt charged with meaning, occupying your thoughts and stealing away any hope of restful sleep. The result was staring back at you in the mirror: bloodshot eyes, dark circles beneath them, and lips that trembled as your maid worked tirelessly to dress you. It’s a pity – no amount of powders or rouge can hide the exhaustion and heartbreak written plainly across your face.
The soft rustling of your white debutante gown fills the room, each movement whispering of elegance and careful tradition. The gown is a masterful creation, carefully chosen by your mother months ago to reflect the quiet dignity of your family’s name. Its bodice is fitted, meticulously embroidered with the finest ivory threads that weave delicate patterns of lilies and vines across the fabric, adding dimension without overpowering.
Around the neckline, a border of tiny pearls catches the morning light, giving the gown a subtle shimmer that, like everything else about it, speaks of refinement over opulence. The gown’s sleeves, long and sheer, are trimmed in lace as fine as a spider’s web, designed to lay gently against your skin rather than cling, as if even the gown itself recognizes the demands of decorum.
The skirts cascade from the waist in a perfect fall of lace and satin, layers upon layers of gossamer fabric that float with your every step. Each layer, though fragile to the touch, is artfully arranged to maintain the gown’s perfect shape, a testament to the skill of its makers and the patience it took to assemble. At the hem, more intricate lacework peeks out, creating a subtle scalloped edge that brushes softly against the floor, finishing the gown with a grace that echoes the restraint of your mother’s discerning eye.
You cannot deny that the gown itself is a marvel, designed to highlight and enhance rather than dominate. It is beautiful, in the way a rose is beautiful—with an elegance that feels both timeless and delicate, whispering that a lady’s virtue lies in restraint, in never asking to be noticed and yet never failing to command attention.
But the corset. Oh, the corset. It felt as though it were designed to squeeze the very life from you.
“Breathe in, my lady,” your maid instructs, her voice strained from the effort of pulling at the stiff fabric. She pulls at the stays until your ribs protest in pain.
“I can’t breathe in anymore,” you bite out, trying and failing to draw in a proper breath. The corset feels like it’s made of iron, constricting your lungs until your vision begins to blur. “It’s too tight. I— I can’t—”
But your lady’s maid is relentless, ignoring your protests as she cinches you even tighter. She ties the final knot with a satisfied sigh. “There. That should hold.”
Hold? It felt more like it was keeping you prisoner, you think grimly, but before you can voice any more complaints, your mother sweeps into the room, her graceful presence filling the space with a quiet authority. Dressed in an elegant gown of soft gray silk, she pauses to take in your appearance, her sharp eyes noting every detail.
Your mother’s eyes scan your dress approvingly, but when her gaze lands on your face, her expression falters. “Dearest, you look... unwell.”
Your heart sinks. “I didn’t sleep much last night,” you confess, eyes cast downward, though you don’t dare mention why. The last thing you need is your mother knowing Seokmin has occupied your thoughts in such a way.
Your mother sighs softly and moves to stand beside you, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. “This day is important, darling. I had hoped you would be well-rested, but...” She trails off, her tone not unkind, but laced with concern. “There is no time now to dwell on it. The Queen waits for no one.”
You nod, feeling a rush of guilt, knowing how much effort has gone into preparing you for this moment. But the weight of the corset and your sleepless night are conspiring to make you feel utterly overwhelmed. Your mother notices, of course. She always does.
“Try not to worry too much,” she says, her voice softening, though it still holds that undercurrent of expectation. “You must keep your chin high, shoulders back. No one need know what little sleep you had. You are beautiful, my dear, no matter the circumstances.”
Her words, though comforting, do little to ease the anxiety building in your chest. But there’s no time left. Your lady’s maid places the final pearl pins in your hair, and your mother gives you a reassuring squeeze before she gestures toward the door. “It’s time.”
Your nerves flutter violently as you’re escorted downstairs and into the awaiting carriage. The ride to the palace feels both endless and far too short. Every bump in the road jostles your already-tight corset, pressing against your ribs and leaving you breathless. The palace is as magnificent as you had heard—no, it’s more. The palace itself is a marvel of architecture, an opulent structure that seems more the work of fantasy than reality. Vaulted ceilings soar impossibly high, held aloft by marble columns adorned with delicate carvings of ivy and mythical creatures that seem to come to life in the flickering candlelight. Every archway is flanked by gilded moldings, winding and curling like golden vines, each detail rendered with the precision of a master sculptor.
Each corner, each angle of the palace seems to lead to something grander than the last, as if it were designed to swallow you whole in beauty. And perhaps it is, you think, as you press a hand over your fluttering heart. For despite the elegance, there is an undeniable sense of intimidation in the sheer scale of it all—a reminder of how small you are in the face of such a place, and of the scrutiny that awaits within these towering, timeworn walls.
You can feel the architecture itself imposing upon you, weighing down like the firm hand of tradition. For a fleeting moment, you imagine yourself wandering through the palace alone, exploring every column and arch, free of the hundreds of eyes upon you. But here, now, with the gaze of history and expectation pressing down, you straighten your shoulders, drawing in a steadying breath, and follow your Mama into the Great Hall. 
The hall is grander than anything you had even dared to imagine. The polished marble floors shine like glass, capturing reflections in delicate ripples that turn the passing gowns of debutantes into pools of lace and silk. Chandeliers hang from above, so immense and dazzling that they appear to drip crystal stars. They illuminate the room with a glow that is almost celestial, casting every inch of the hall in a warmth befitting the Queen herself.
To your right and left, mirrors taller than any man stretch to the ceiling, framed in gold leaf as intricate as lacework. The mirrors hold your gaze as you pass, capturing the girls beside you as they float forward with their mothers, each one a shimmering, blushing vision in white. You see yourself in these mirrors too, and although the gown fits you perfectly, somehow you feel like you’re wearing another’s skin. For a moment, you imagine your reflection whispering back, “Are you really here?”
The walls are covered in the richest velvet, deep greens and ruby reds that somehow make the hall feel even grander, as if you’ve stepped into the very heart of royalty itself. Enormous portraits of past queens and kings line the hall, each gaze strong and serene, as if they’re assessing every girl who dares to walk beneath their painted eyes. Somewhere in your chest, a knot forms and tightens. It’s strange, the feeling of being surrounded by so much opulence, as if the walls are watching, waiting for something that only they understand.
And perhaps that’s why your breath is so unsteady, why your heartbeat seems to echo through the hall in time with your footsteps. The palace, beautiful as it is, leaves you feeling like a creature of some lesser world, an intruder who has somehow wandered into a realm that does not belong to you. It’s not so much a place as a spectacle, a stunning, overbearing reminder of all that you must live up to, of all the scrutiny you’ll face from these grand walls, these glittering chandeliers, and yes, the very Queen herself. Every step feels like you are walking deeper into a lion’s den, where your every move will be scrutinized, your worth as a young lady judged by the sharpest eyes in the kingdom.
You move with the other debutantes, each girl dressed in white, adorned with jewels and delicate veils, the picture of youth and grace. The line seems to stretch forever as you wait your turn to be announced. The air is thick with anticipation, the rustle of satin and silk as the ladies murmur quietly to one another, some excited, others as nervous as you feel. Your own dress, despite its beauty, feels like a trap. The corset restricts your every breath, and the weight of expectation presses on your shoulders like a leaden cloak.
Your heart pounds in your chest as you scan the room, your nerves growing worse by the second. And then, in the far corner, you spot them. Minghao stands with an air of composure, his eyes quietly observing the room, his presence as regal as ever. Your brother watches the proceedings with a detached elegance, his eyes flickering over the debutantes without much interest. His gaze flicks to you, and for a moment, you feel a strange sense of calm knowing your brother is watching.
But next to him, is Seokmin.
He stands taller than most, his posture rigid but his face warm, though tinged with concern. While your brother is a portrait of his birthright and title, Seokmin is different. His gaze is sharper, more intent, and when his eyes find yours, the familiar comfort of his presence makes your heart stutter. You try to remind yourself to breathe, but the memory of his touch, his words, from the night prior clings to you like a shadow.
Seokmin’s expression softens when he sees you, and for a moment, the whole room seems to fall away. His lips quirk in a small, reassuring smile, and though you try to return it, your own face feels tight, your nerves too frayed to muster anything convincing.
As if sensing your unease, Seokmin’s eyes narrow with concern. Does he notice how your corset presses too tightly into your ribs? Or how your eyes are puffy from lack of sleep? The warmth in his gaze is mixed with a flicker of something unreadable, something almost protective. You are painfully aware of his gaze, and the thought of him watching you stumble through this day feels like too much to bear.
The line of debutantes inches forward, each young lady presented with grace and poise, or at least, the appearance of it. Your nerves churn violently in your stomach as your name is finally called. Your mother tightens her grip, ever so slightly, and it’s a silent reminder – You are a Xu. Do not falter. 
“Miss Y/N Xu, sister of the Duke of Somerset,” the herald crows, and every eye in the room fixes on you. “Presented by her mother, the Right Honorable Dowager Duchess of Somerset.”
Your legs feel like jelly as you take your first step forward, your skirts swishing around you. The weight of the gown, the tightness of your corset, and the heavy stares from all corners of the room press down on you. You try to steady your breathing, but the corset refuses to allow for even that small comfort.
Just as you take a step, disaster strikes.
Your heel catches on the hem of your gown.
You stumble forward, arms flailing slightly to catch yourself, but the weight of your skirts and the tightness of your corset make it impossible to recover gracefully. A collective gasp echoes through the room, and you feel your cheeks flush with mortification.
The whispers are instant, rippling through the crowd like wildfire. You can feel the stares—sharp, judgmental, unforgiving. Your mother’s grip tightens, and though she says nothing, you can feel her disapproval radiating through her hold. She doesn’t need to scold you—not in public. But the sting of her disappointment is enough to make you want to shrink into the floor.
Still, you manage to regain your footing, if only barely. You take a shaky breath and continue forward, your knees trembling with each step. But it gets worse. With every move, the corset seems to tighten further, squeezing the breath from your lungs until black spots dance in the corners of your vision.
Just as you’re about to curtsy before the Queen, your knees buckle.
A choking cough rips from your throat, loud and desperate, echoing through the grand hall. You’re bent over at the waist, gasping for breath, your corset pressing tighter with every moment. You cough again, and again, unable to stop, your eyes watering as you struggle to compose yourself.
The Queen, perched on her throne in all her regal glory, watches with a raised eyebrow, her disapproval palpable. Her expression is one of distaste, as if you are a spectacle—an amusing disaster.
Your mother murmurs beside you, “Steady yourself,” and her grip tightens with fury and disappointment in equal measure. It’s too late. Your corset has robbed you of the ability to breathe, and the weight of the entire room’s gaze crushes you. Your vision swims again, and for one horrifying moment, you think you might faint right there in front of the Queen.
Finally, you manage to straighten yourself, gasping for air, your face flushed and tear-streaked. You risk a glance toward the far side of the room, where Minghao and Seokmin still stand.
Minghao’s face is impassive, though his eyes are dark with what could only be disappointment. Seokmin, on the other hand, looks as though he might bolt across the room to help you. His hands clench at his sides, his jaw tight as his eyes flick between you and the Queen.
The Queen’s cold, cutting voice slices through the silence. “Miss Xu,” she says slowly, her tone dripping with disapproval. “It seems you are... unwell.”
Your heart sinks into your stomach. You manage a wobbly curtsy, your knees nearly giving out beneath you again as you lower yourself.
“Perhaps Miss Y/N should reconsider her readiness for society,” the Queen continues icily. “A young lady of such delicate constitution may not be suited for the rigors of court.”
Her words land like a blow. You rise slowly, trying to keep your chin held high, though your hands tremble and your vision remains blurry from the humiliation. All you want is for this moment to end. To disappear.
As you retreat, the whispers rise in volume, filling the grand hall with gossip and speculation. You can feel the weight of every gaze on you, every judgment passed in an instant. But it is Seokmin’s gaze that you search for in the crowd. His eyes meet yours, and though they are filled with concern, they are also gentle, understanding. A small comfort in the midst of your disaster.
Your mother, ever composed, whispers to you as she leads you from the room, her voice calm but firm. “We will speak of this later, darling. But for now, we must leave with grace.”
You nod weakly, still too breathless and embarrassed to respond. And as you step out of the grand hall, the day that was supposed to mark your entrance into society feels like anything but. All you can think about is how miserably everything went wrong—and how, even in the midst of it all, Seokmin’s gaze had found yours, steady and unwavering.
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The silence presses on as the carriage trundles through the city streets, each wheel hitting the cobbles with a sound like a hammer to your heart. You’re trapped, here in this carriage, with no escape from your mother’s disappointment or the day’s memories—the whispered laughter, the blunder before the Queen, and the sheer, unbearable heat of your mortification.
Minghao’s hand rests over yours for only a heartbeat, but it’s enough to keep you from crumbling entirely. Though he releases your hand quickly to avoid Mama’s watchful eye, the gesture is enough to ground you, pulling you back to this place instead of letting you spiral into all the things you could have, should have done differently.
At last, your mother clears her throat, a carefully composed sound that cuts through the quiet like a knife.
“Well,” she says, her voice clipped and precise, “that was… quite the spectacle.” Her tone is a blend of disappointment and a tight, forced restraint. “I had hoped, naturally, for a… more dignified presentation.”
You swallow, feeling the flush of embarrassment burn anew. “I—” you start, but the words catch, failing under the weight of everything you wish to explain and the knowledge that no explanation will undo what’s done.
She adjusts her gloves with a sharp, precise tug, a calculated movement that somehow manages to convey her frustration without a single word. “I trust,” she begins slowly, every syllable measured, “that you understand the gravity of today’s events.”
You swallow, focusing on the intricate embroidery of your gown, tracing the delicate threads to distract yourself from the pressing sting of her words.
“Mother, I—” you stammer, but she holds up a gloved hand, silencing you before the words even form.
“We spent months preparing for this moment,” she continues, her voice tight with restrained emotion. “Months, to ensure you would have the debut any young lady of our family should. Your dress, your bearing, every detail was attended to so you would represent us with grace, with decorum. And yet, today…” She trails off, her eyes gliding over you with a look that could curdle milk.
“It wasn’t her fault,” Minghao interjects quietly, and though his tone is gentle, there’s a faint edge to his words, as though even he cannot quite hold back his defense. He shoots a quick, sidelong glance at you, a small, reluctant smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “The Queen’s hall was suffocating, and the entire affair was clearly designed to unnerve anyone in attendance.”
Your mother’s expression softens just a fraction as she regards her son, but she’s hardly swayed. “The Queen’s hall has been the site of countless debuts. If anything, the occasion called for composure, not… fainting spells.”
You clench your fists, the fabric of your dress twisting between your fingers, and look resolutely at the floor. As painful as it is to hear, you know your mother is not entirely wrong. Today was supposed to be your moment of triumph, the day you stepped forward as a young woman ready for society, carrying your family’s reputation with poise and dignity.
But instead, you remember the heat that had pressed in from all sides, the feeling of your corset cutting into your ribs, how your hands had trembled with each step. It was supposed to have been an easy task, to walk forward, cursty, and meet the Queen’s gaze with calm respect. And yet, you had felt every gaze upon you like a burn, each stumble echoing through the endless hall. And then, Seokmin’s eyes finding yours, calm and steady…
The memory stirs something warm within you, a faint flicker of relief that somehow dampens the embarrassment. The Queen’s gaze may have been unyielding, your mother’s disappointment all-consuming, but for that one moment, you had felt tethered, no longer alone.
Outside, the sun dips lower, casting long shadows across the city as the carriage continues its steady roll homeward. The silence stretches again, and the weight of it settles around you like an invisible veil. Minghao catches your eye, and though he says nothing, the look he gives you speaks volumes—a quiet reassurance, a reminder that this one day does not define you, that he still believes in you despite every misstep.
Your mother finally sighs, a faint softening in her shoulders. “We’ll regroup,” she murmurs, almost to herself. “There will be more opportunities, of course, but we’ll need to be mindful, thoughtful. A second chance may not be as kind.” She glances at you, and though her expression remains stern, there’s a glimmer of something almost like understanding.
The carriage ride stretches on in silence once more, each of you lost in thoughts. You glance out the window, watching the city roll by, lanterns casting fleeting golden glows against the carriage walls. It feels surreal, how a day so longed for turned into a series of mishaps, one after another. But as the carriage rounds a corner, you catch a memory from earlier: Seokmin’s eyes, grounding you, unwavering, somehow knowing how terrifying each step felt, how every misstep seemed amplified beneath the weight of so many watching.
As the carriage wheels finally begin to slow, approaching the gates of your family estate, you feel a shift within yourself. Today may have been a disaster, and yet, Seokmin’s gaze and Minghao’s quiet support linger, like small anchors in the storm of the day.
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The drawing room is a sanctuary of elegance, its ornate moldings and rich fabrics designed to impress. Tall windows frame the view of the manicured gardens outside, sunlight pouring through in golden streams that dance across the polished wooden floor. Yet, despite the beauty surrounding you, it feels more like a gilded cage today. The delicate scent of lavender from the nearby vase does little to soothe the turmoil within.
You sit hunched over a needlepoint project, your fingers fumbling with the bright threads that feel foreign against your skin. The canvas before you, a swirl of colors and patterns, seems to mock your inability to focus. Your mind wanders far beyond the needlework, replaying the events of your disastrous debut like a never-ending nightmare. Each time you think of it, a fresh wave of humiliation washes over you, sharp and unyielding, like a thorn that refuses to dislodge itself from your heart.
“Goodness, how is one expected to focus with this nonsense?” you mutter under your breath, the needle slipping from your fingers yet again and leaving a careless knot in the thread. You curse softly, frustration bubbling to the surface.
Your mother sits comfortably in her armchair, her brow slightly furrowed as she loses herself in the pages of a novel, the rustle of paper punctuating the silence. Minghao lounges on the settee across from you, flipping through a collection of sketches, the corner of his mouth twitching in amusement at his artistic efforts. Every so often, his gaze flickers towards you, a mixture of concern and curiosity etched into his features, but he respects your silence, understanding that you are still recovering from the scarring events of your debut into polite society.
Just then, the door swings open, and Seokmin steps into the room, his presence a burst of light that seems to chase away the shadows clinging to your thoughts. It has been years since the butler last announced his arrival—his visits are far too frequent now, and you can’t help but feel a mix of warmth and apprehension at his entrance. His usually buoyant demeanor is tempered by a trace of concern as he takes in the scene before him, the way your shoulders droop as if weighed down by invisible chains.
“Good morning!” he declares, his voice bright yet careful, testing the waters of your melancholy. “I do hope I’m not intruding.”
“Not at all,” your mother replies, glancing up from her book, her eyes sparkling with a hint of mischief. “In fact, you may be just what our dear girl needs.”
You offer a small, half-hearted smile, the corners of your lips barely lifting. “And what would that be? A distraction or a dose of reality?”
Seokmin approaches, his smile as warm as the sunlight flooding the room. “A bit of both, if you’ll allow me.” He perches himself on the arm of your chair, leaning in just enough to draw your focus from the needlepoint chaos. “That was quite the debut you had, dear friend. How are you holding up?”
“Barely,” you sigh, tossing the errant needlepoint aside as if it were the source of all your woes. “I feel as if I’ve stumbled through a door marked ‘exit’ into an abyss of mortification.”
His eyes widen with sympathy, and in that moment, your heart flutters, torn between admiration and the painful reality that he may never feel the same. Seokmin has a way of making the world feel lighter, yet your feelings for him are a weight that often threatens to pull you under.
“Ah, yes,” he nods sagely, as if you have just shared the most profound wisdom. “The abyss of polite society can be quite unforgiving. I believe it’s marked with ‘no entrance’ signs, but alas, they are easily overlooked.”
Minghao chuckles softly, his attention now fully diverted from his sketches. “You do have a gift for exaggeration, Seokmin.”
“It’s a talent,” Seokmin replies, feigning an air of grandeur, his hand pressing dramatically to his heart. “But truly, do not let the Queen’s judgment define you. You are far too radiant for that.”
You snort, the sound escaping before you can suppress it. “Radiant? Is that what you call it when one trips over their own gown and nearly faints in front of our sovereign?”
“Why, yes! A splendid display of athleticism!” he shoots back, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “You’ve inadvertently entertained a room full of people—something they are certain to remember for ages.”
“But not in the way I had hoped,” you reply, frustration seeping into your voice as the memory of the evening flashes before your eyes, a storm of embarrassment churning within you.
“Ah, but hope can be a slippery creature,” he counters, tilting his head to meet your gaze. “What matters is how you choose to move forward. I have heard of many a lady whose debut was marred by similar accidents—yet they rise from the ashes like phoenixes, dazzling everyone with their resilience.”
“Is that your way of saying I should make a grand return to society?” You raise an eyebrow, your heart flickering with the suggestion. “Perhaps adorned in feathers and sequins to distract from my previous mistake?”
“I’d be the first to support such a feat,” he replies earnestly, the sincerity in his voice a soothing balm for your frayed nerves. But beneath your amusement lies an aching truth: his encouragement only highlights the chasm between your feelings and his indifference. He will never look at you the way you long for.
“Yes, Lord Lee, what a wonderful idea!” your mother exclaims, her book long forgotten. “The Fitzwilliam Ball is to be held in the coming weeks—what a splendid way for our darling girl to re-enter society!”
Your face falls. A ball? So soon? The very thought sends a tremor of panic racing through you. “Mama, I—”
“Yes, Mother, a splendid idea indeed,” Minghao muses, a teasing glint in his eye. When you turn your glare to him, he sticks his tongue out meanly, and Seokmin suppresses a chuckle.
You take a deep breath, fighting against the swell of anxiety rising in your chest. “I’m not certain I’m ready for another ball, not after—” you start, but the words die on your lips as Seokmin’s gaze locks onto yours. His expression is gentle yet determined, a silent encouragement that stirs something deep within you.
“Ready or not, life moves on,” he says softly, leaning closer as if sharing a secret. “You have to take the reins, even if the prospect is daunting.”
You want to believe him, to embrace his unwavering optimism, but doubt gnaws at you. Can you truly face another crowd, the whispers, the judgment? Your heart flutters erratically, caught in a tempest of affection and despair. Seokmin’s eyes shine with an earnestness that quickens your pulse, yet it only reminds you of the gulf that lies between your feelings and his casual indifference.
“Life indeed moves on,” you echo, your voice barely above a whisper, more to yourself than to anyone else. “But what if I stumble again? What if I make an even greater fool of myself?”
Seokmin’s smile falters for just a moment, replaced by a flicker of understanding that cuts through the air like a knife. “We all stumble, but that’s how we learn to rise,” he replies, his tone steady yet soft. “And besides, I’ll be there. I promise I’ll help you navigate any disaster.”
His words wrap around you like a lifeline, a flicker of hope igniting your heart. But as the warmth of his promise settles in, a cold weight begins to press upon you. You look into his eyes, searching for something more, but find only the steadfast gaze of a friend—someone who would catch you if you fell, but only as a friend.
“Right,” you murmur, the pain of acceptance settling in your chest like a stone, heavy and unyielding, a reminder of the distance between you.
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The late evening light filters softly through the sheer curtains of your room, casting a warm glow that barely reaches the pile of books haphazardly stacked beside your bed. These books, filled with tales of love and adventure, have provided a much-needed refuge from the reality of your recent debut. For days now, you’ve chosen to cocoon yourself in their comforting embrace, avoiding the whispers and curious glances of society that followed you after your disastrous introduction.
You had resolutely refused to attend any of the society events your mother deemed essential—the lady’s tea, with its orchestrated conversations and veiled judgments, or the garden party, where laughter seemed to echo around you while you felt only isolation. The thought of facing the same debutantes, the same mamas, their glances lingering a moment too long on you, made your stomach churn. Instead, you preferred the solace of your room, the pages of your books offering both distraction and comfort as you lost yourself in worlds far removed from the judgmental eyes of the ton.
But tonight, your mother is insistent. At last, the Fitzwilliam Ball is upon you, and you have no escape from your mother’s gentle chiding. “Darling,” she calls gently, her voice a melody that pulls you from the pages of your latest escape. The delicate scent of lavender wafts through the air as she steps into the room, her presence commanding yet warm. It is an unusual moment—your lady’s maid typically oversees your dressing, managing the layers of fabric and the intricate details of your ensemble. But today, it is your mother who steps into that role, a significant act that carries with it the weight of her affection and a chance to bridge the gap that your previous missteps had created.
“It’s time to get ready, my dear,” she says, her tone gentle but firm, as she approaches your wardrobe. As she opens the doors, the sight of your gown hanging inside takes your breath away.
The dress, an ethereal creation of lavender silk, shimmers like moonlight trapped in fabric. The bodice is adorned with intricate embroidery that depicts delicate vines and blossoms, each stitch telling a story of artistry and care. The sleeves are fitted, with lace cascading down to create a soft ruffle at the wrist, and the skirt flows in layers, each tier of lace and silk billowing like clouds as it moves. It is a gown befitting a princess, meticulously designed to showcase your family’s esteemed standing while allowing a hint of youthful exuberance to shine through.
“This gown is truly magnificent,” you murmur, your fingers tracing the embroidered flowers as your mother gently lifts it from the wardrobe. “I can’t believe you chose it yourself.”
“Of course, I did. It’s time for your grand re-entrance to society, after all,” she replies, a smile dancing on her lips as she helps you into the gown. The fabric wraps around you like a dream, soft and luxurious, but as your mother laces the bodice, the realization of how tightly it pulls leaves you breathless. Each tug of the laces feels like a reminder of the expectations that have come to define you, but your mother’s presence softens the edges of that pressure.
Yet, it is not discomfort that fills the room. Instead, the sounds of your mother’s laughter and intelligence wrap themselves around you. Your mother’s hands are gentle as she fastens each lace, her fingers brushing against your skin in a manner that reassures you. The stern disappointment of your debut, where you felt like a shadow beneath the weight of expectations, seems to dissipate, replaced by her usual grace and kindness. As she works, her voice drifts like a melody, recounting stories from her own youth, her laughter echoing softly against the mirror as if the memories bring light to the room.
With every loop of ribbon and every gentle tug, she weaves a tapestry of love and support, a tangible reminder that tonight is not merely a duty but a celebration of who you are. As she arranges your hair into an elegant updo, delicately weaving in pearl pins that glimmer like stars, you catch a glimpse of the woman she has always been beneath the layers of propriety. The warmth of her presence washes over you, igniting a flicker of hope that perhaps tonight will mark a new beginning.
“Are you ready?” she asks, stepping back to admire her handiwork, a satisfied gleam in her eyes.
“I suppose as ready as I’ll ever be,” you reply, taking a moment to admire your reflection. The gown transforms you into a vision of beauty, yet beneath the surface, you feel a tempest of uncertainty swirling within you.
“Now, let’s see what your brother thinks.” Your mother gestures toward the door, and as you descend the staircase, your heart quickens with every step.
At the foot of the stairs, Minghao waits patiently, the embodiment of duty and familial pride. His presence, regal and calm, adds to the moment’s gravity. Dressed in a tailored coat that accentuates his stature, he stands as the dutiful son and duke, ready to escort both you and your mother to the ball. The contrast between his composed demeanor and your own fluttering heart is stark, yet comforting. As you make your way down the stairs, your mother’s gentle squeeze of your hand gives you a modicum of strength, each step drawing you closer to the world outside that awaits your return.
“Sister,” Mighao greets, mirth dancing in his eyes. “I suppose if tonight is your big night, this gown does not offend the eyes.”
“Minghao!” Your mother’s rebuke is instant, a gentle reprimand that lightens the atmosphere with her authority.
“For goodness’ sake, brother,” you admonish, donning a façade of false bravado to hide the anxiety swirling within. “It seems as if you would simply keel over before you ever paid me a proper compliment!” You attempt to feign indignation, but the corners of your mouth betray you with the hint of a smile.
As you reach the bottom step, he extends his arm, a silent invitation to escort both you and your mother to the ball. It’s a gesture of duty, but there’s an undertone of affection that brings warmth to your heart. He may be the dutiful son and duke, poised and impeccably dressed in his tailored attire, but in this moment, he is simply your brother—standing beside you as a steadfast protector against the uncertainties of the evening ahead.
Your mother glances at both of you, her eyes sparkling with pride and a hint of nostalgia. “Shall we?” she prompts, her voice carrying a note of excitement that sends a flutter through your stomach.
With a deep breath, you take Minghao’s arm, feeling the reassuring strength of his presence as he leads you both toward the waiting carriage. The air outside is brisk, filled with the scent of blooming jasmine and the distant hum of music preparing to fill the grand halls. Each step you take resonates with the rhythm of your heartbeat, a mix of trepidation and hope.
As you settle into the plush interior of the carriage, the door closes with a soft click, sealing you away from the familiar confines of home and ushering you into a world of possibility. The grandeur of the evening awaits, and as the carriage rolls forward, the cobblestones beneath you echo with the anticipation of what’s to come.
You can’t shake the feeling that this night holds the promise of something new—perhaps redemption, or at the very least, the opportunity to reclaim your place among the society that had once felt so cruel. As the carriage sways gently with each turn, you steal a glance at your mother and brother, their expressions a blend of excitement and encouragement. In this moment, surrounded by their unwavering support, you begin to believe that maybe, just maybe, tonight could be different.
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Fate is certainly a cruel mistress—despite your greatest hopes, the ball is positively dismal.
The ballroom is every bit as grand as you’d imagined—no, grander. Chandeliers dripping with golden light cascade overhead, casting a warm, ethereal glow over the polished marble floor. The air is thick with the intoxicating scent of roses and jasmine, mingling with the lively music of the orchestra, where violins soar and the occasional trill of laughter punctuates the harmony. Silks and satins swirl in every direction as the season’s debutantes twirl with their suitors, their gowns a riot of color that makes you feel like a ghost in comparison.
But none of it feels as magical as you once thought it would. Instead, you stand to the side, clutching the silk of your gown, its intricate lace and delicate pearls feeling like a weight rather than a luxury. Your mother had ensured that every stitch was perfect, every detail immaculate, to help erase the memory of your disastrous debut. Yet, it hasn’t worked. The whispers haven’t stopped. Even here, amidst the splendor, you can feel the gazes sliding over you, only to dart away, as if your very presence is a reminder of your failure.
The other debutantes are radiant, their smiles bright as they are swept onto the dance floor by handsome, eligible gentlemen. But you... you might as well be invisible.
Your heart sinks as you watch them, a heavy weight settling in your chest. This is meant to be a night of joy and celebration, yet you feel like a fragile glass ornament left behind, forgotten in the bustle of a festive occasion. The laughter and music create a vibrant tapestry of life around you, but inside, you’re drowning in a sea of insecurity and self-doubt.
Just when despair threatens to envelop you entirely, a presence beside you breaks through the haze. Seokmin, as effortlessly charming as ever, sidles up, his dark eyes twinkling with mischief. “Quite the spectacle, isn’t it?” he remarks, his voice low so only you can hear. “I’m certain some of these mamas could lead an army with the way they maneuver their daughters.”
You blink at him, surprised by his lightheartedness. Despite the heat of embarrassment burning your cheeks, a smile pulls at your lips, momentarily pushing aside the shadows clouding your heart.
Before you can respond, he holds his hand out to you, a silent invitation, and for a moment, you hesitate. Seokmin, who could have any lady in the room, is asking you to dance? Your heart stutters, a wild flutter of hope mingling with anxiety, and you glance around, acutely aware of the whispers beginning to stir again. People are noticing the exchange, their eyes narrowing in speculation. But Seokmin stands before you, his hand outstretched, waiting with an easy confidence that momentarily disarms you.
With a deep breath, you place your gloved hand in his, and he leads you to the center of the ballroom as if it were the most natural thing in the world. The moment your feet hit the floor, however, the murmurs begin in earnest, slicing through the enchantment that had briefly settled around you.
“Isn’t that the girl?” someone whispers, just loud enough for you to hear. “The one who fainted?”
“I’d heard,” another voice chimes in, “that no one would ask her to dance. Poor dear, but what did she expect after such a performance?”
You keep your eyes firmly fixed on Seokmin, but each word is like a needle, sharp and painful, pricking at your composure. The worst of it comes when you catch sight of one of the mamas, her face set in a smirk as she whispers to her daughter—the same daughter you had once taken pianoforte lessons with. The girl lets out a small, mean-spirited laugh, and your stomach twists, the laughter echoing like a death toll.
The memory of your debut hangs over you like a dark cloud, heavy and suffocating. Your embarrassment simmers, threatening to boil over. The murmurs become unbearable, and instinctively, you move to pull away from Seokmin, ready to flee. But before you can, his grip tightens, firm but gentle.
“Leaving so soon?” he teases, his voice low and playful, a lifeline in the midst of the storm. “Didn’t your mama teach you it’s bad manners to leave in the middle of a dance?”
You try to focus on his words, on the feel of his hand in yours, but it’s no use. You feel like every eye is on you, dissecting your every movement, judging, whispering, laughing. Seokmin is a shield, but he can’t block all the venom aimed at you.
“I can’t—” you begin, your voice thick with emotion, but Seokmin cuts you off.
He reaches up, loosening a perfectly pinned curl from your hair, letting it fall gently by your cheek. His eyes are soft, almost tender, and in that moment, you feel something flutter to life in your chest. “Eyes on me, Tulip,” he murmurs, and the way he says it—so calm, so sure—makes your heart skip a beat.
For the briefest moment, you think he might love you. That despite the gossip, despite the humiliation, Seokmin sees you—the girl beneath the debutante, the one who has admired him from afar for so long. But then, out of the corner of your eye, you see Minghao. He stands by the edge of the ballroom, watching. And then—he nods. It’s subtle, almost imperceptible, but Seokmin notices, and he nods back.
Your blood runs cold.
You blink up at Seokmin, the warmth in your chest turning to ice. “Did you do this because Minghao asked you to?” The words slip out before you can stop them, low and desperate, laced with betrayal.
Seokmin’s brow furrows. “Do what?”
“This. The dance.” You glance around at the swirling crowd, the eyes that have never left you. “The attention. Did you ask me because he wanted you to? To salvage my prospects?”
His confusion is genuine, but the truth is written in his face—open, honest, and devastating. He hesitates, and it’s all you need to know.
“Damn you,” you whisper, voice shaking with fury and hurt. His eyes widen, shocked by the venom in your voice, the curse slipping from your lips like something foreign. “Damn you, Lee Seokmin.”
“Y/N—” he starts, his voice softening, trying to explain, to defend himself. But you don’t give him the chance.
“I thought,” you continue, the words tumbling out in a rush, “I thought you asked me because you wanted to, not because you were told to. I thought you held me in higher regard than this.” You laugh bitterly, a sound that catches in your throat. “How foolish of me.”
The onlookers are whispering more now, their curiosity piqued by the tension in the air, the way your voice trembles with barely contained emotion. But you don’t care. You’re done caring.
With a mocking curtsy, you drop your hands from his and step back. “My lord,” you say, dripping with sarcasm, “I do apologize for any inconvenience to your social standing.”
Seokmin’s eyes widen, panic flashing in them as he realizes the gravity of your words, the weight of what you’re about to do. “Y/N, wait—”
But you don’t wait. You turn on your heel and stalk toward the ballroom’s exit, your skirts swirling around you in a flurry of lilac silk and lace, your heart pounding painfully in your chest. The gasps and murmurs of the guests fade into the background as you flee, your vision blurred with unshed tears.
Behind you, Seokmin’s voice calls out, desperate, pleading. “Y/N, please—stay—”
But you don’t look back. You run.
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The chill of the night air bites at your skin as you emerge from the grand ballroom, the sounds of the festivities quickly swallowed by the night. Minghao is hot on your heels, and you hear the familiar click of his shoes echoing against the cobblestone streets. As you enter the carriage, your fury erupts like a dam breaking.
“How dare you meddle in my life?” you exclaim, the words bursting forth with a fervor that sends a shiver down your spine. The tears spill over, mingling with the delicate fabric, each droplet a testament to your exasperation. “I wish to be left alone!”
Minghao, ever the picture of serene composure, raises an eyebrow, though his calm demeanor only serves to ignite your temper further. “I’m only trying to help you, dear sister,” he replies, his voice as soothing as a summer breeze.
“Help? Is that what you call this? You think I’m some delicate flower that requires your constant tending?” Your heart beats faster, each pulse an echo of your indignation. “You are not my keeper, Minghao!”
He opens his mouth, surely to deliver some well-meaning retort, but you are not in the mood for restraint. “You think I can’t manage my own affairs? That I need you to dictate who I should associate with? Let me remind you, I am not a child!”
In a fit of fury, you throw one of your shoes toward him, the delicate slipper soaring through the air; Minghao ducks just in time, the shoe landing with a soft thud against the carriage wall.
“Is this truly your idea of a civilized discussion?” he remarks, feigning offense. “Throwing footwear instead of engaging in rational discourse? My, how you’ve mastered the art of temper tantrums!”
“Better to throw a shoe than to be lectured like a schoolgirl!” you counter, your voice rising to match his. “You presume to know what is best for me, but you are merely reflecting your own apprehensions! You have no concept of my struggles!”
Minghao’s brow furrows, and for a fleeting moment, his expression softens, as if he might relent. But then he leans forward, his voice low and fervent. “And you believe that sulking in the corner will resolve anything? You are only isolating yourself further!”
“Perhaps I wish to be alone!” you declare, your voice ringing with defiance, the words spilling out like water from a broken dam. “Perhaps I grow weary of this charade, that everything is perfect when it is most decidedly not!”
A tense silence envelops the carriage, the air thick with unspoken words. You both breathe heavily, the conflict hanging between you like a fine silk thread ready to snap. The rest of the ride is steeped in a heavy silence, each passing moment thickening the air with unspoken words and unresolved feelings. You lean against the plush seat of the carriage, your gaze fixed on the world outside. The blurred lights of the city flicker past, dimming into the encroaching darkness, and with each glimmer that fades from view, a piece of your heart seems to shatter.
Inside, your thoughts spiral. Betrayal gnaws at you like a ravenous beast, devouring any remnants of confidence you had managed to muster before the ball. Seokmin was supposed to be your ally in this fight, your so-called “loyal servant”; a beacon of warmth amidst hushed whispers. Yet now, as the reality settles in, you realize he is merely Minghao's friend, not yours. 
How could you have been so naïve? Your mind races back to moments you once cherished: the laughter shared over private nicknames, the comfort of his presence when you felt small and insignificant. He had danced with you, yes, but it had been an act of duty, an obligation to your brother, not a genuine desire to hold you close. You had hoped, foolishly, that he might look beyond your failed debut, that he might understand the person beneath the gown and lace. Yet here you are, reduced to a mere pawn in a game you didn’t even want to play.
A sob catches in your throat, but you swallow it down. Instead, you grip the edges of your gown tightly, feeling the intricate lace and delicate pearls dig into your palms, until you are sure you will have bruises in the morning.
How could Seokmin have allowed himself to be used this way? Did he not care enough to stand by you when it mattered most? He had seen you, yes, but only through the lens of loyalty to Minghao, not as the woman you wished to be, not as the friend you had thought he saw.
By the time the carriage arrives at your home, the bitterness in your chest is a wellspring of anguish. The vibrant ball is now a distant memory, a dream turned nightmare, and all you can do is silently mourn the friendship you thought would endure. You glance at Minghao, his face set in a mask of determination, oblivious to the storm of emotion swirling inside you.
As you step out of the carriage, he follows closely behind, his footsteps heavy with regret. “Y/N,” he begins, his voice low and earnest, “I thought I was doing what was best for you. I thought—”
You cut him off, spinning to face him, your expression fierce with hurt. “It’s too late, brother,” you declare, the words like shards of glass spilling from your lips. “You don’t get to decide what’s best for me. You’ve ruined everything.”
His eyes widen, a mixture of shock and remorse flooding his features. “I never meant to hurt you—”
“It doesn’t matter what you meant!” you snap, frustration and pain intertwining in a chaotic dance. “You acted without thinking. You’ve taken something precious from me.”
Minghao opens his mouth to argue, to defend himself, but the words die on his lips. The truth hangs in the air, heavy and palpable, as the reality of your fractured trust settles between you.
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For the rest of the season, you do your best to blend into the walls at every ball, and you succeed. You become a shadow flitting between vibrant gowns and boisterous laughter. Each event becomes a blur of swirling colors and muffled sounds. You move quietly, navigating the sea of opulence with a heavy heart, wearing a mask of indifference that hides the turmoil brewing just beneath the surface.
You linger in corners, your fingers tracing the intricate patterns of wallpaper as if seeking solace in their delicate designs. The bright chandeliers above cast their warm glow on the happy couples swirling in perfect harmony, while you remain firmly anchored in your solitude, an invisible wall erected around your heart. You watch as others twirl and laugh, and your heart aches for Seokmin’s easy companionship, the lively conversations and playful banter that now feel like a distant memory.
With each passing ball, the weight of your isolation grows heavier. Minghao’s well-intentioned apologies echo in your mind, but their impact fades against the reality of your existence. You’ve become an expert at deflecting curious gazes, practicing the art of blending in so well that the laughter and music seem to wash over you like water off a duck’s back.
But it is Seokmin’s absence that echoes loudest in your heart. He might have always been your brother’s best friend, but you had hoped he would be something more—something real. As the music swells, the realization settles heavily on your shoulders: you are utterly, irrevocably alone.
Seokmin doesn’t ask you to dance again for the rest of the season. 
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Tagging: @kibs-and-bits@moondustmemories@shinwonderful@ivehypnosis@gwend0lyne @thestoryofana13 @mellowamour @blissedjoon @begentlewithme-please @xabsolutelynothingx @reiofsuns2001 @mngyulvrs @mooniewrld @archivistworld @lexyraeworld @ateez-atiny380 @walkinganxiety01 @lovecleastrange
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genderqueerdykes · 1 day ago
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(tw: vent, relationship abuse, transphobia)
from 2020-2023, i was in a toxic relationship with a terf. she identified as a (still truscum-y) trans guy when we first got together, but about halfway through she detransitioned and pressured me to detransition as well. i identified as nonbinary at the time and i was scared of not listening to her, so i detransitioned because i thought i was being misogynistic if i didn’t. things just got worse, her transphobia got more radical, and we grew further apart, especially when i started questioning my identity again.
it’s been over a year since we broke up. i’ve started my transition as a trans man, i have her blocked on everything, but i still keep thinking about all the ways she hurt me. it feels like she’s winning. most sources i find on toxic relationships are really heteronormative and rely heavily on gender binaries, so they’ve been no help. do you have any advice on queer toxic relationships and/or unlearning internalized transphobia? thanks so much, no pressure to answer this if you don’t have the spoons
that's terrible, i'm so sorry you went through that. that's a long time to have to deal with someone pressuring you to change how you refer to yourself and how you see yourself. it's okay if someone needs to detransition but they should never force anyone else to just because transitioning like that was wrong for them. i'm so sorry she acted like she knew what was best for you. it's painful to watch someone fall down that rabbit hole and never come back. you want them to be kinder and to love themselves and everyone else, but it's just not the case
whenever people try to tell me that i "don't understand rad feminism", i point to experiences like yours. rad fems tell people that it's literally somehow "misogynistic" for trans men and mascs to transition. they tell people that that trans men and mascs are a danger to women. they tell people that trans men and mascs are confused and don't know any better. they tell trans men and mascs how to think, and they're doing it to everyone else, too. there's never a good reason to call someone misogynistic for transitioning
i would say maybe try to touch base with communities for transmasculine people and trans men. even if you meet a few people you like in the tags here, it's worth it. remind yourself that you weren't wrong, that person just thought she knew what was right for you. she saw something she hated in herself. it has nothing to do with how you should feel about yourself. you'll run into bumps and snags with how you feel about gender, especially your own. it's not a bad sign, it just takes time to get over the shitty things you were taught.
you can't dismantle it all at once, to take time, pace yourself. you were literally being groomed to hate yourself and other people. you need a moment before you can become proud of who you are. someone whittled you down until you were nearly nothing. that's not easy to move on from in a quick fashion. manhood is not evil. manhood is not what's hurting people. men are diverse. men are not a monolith. making blanket statements about men is profiling
i hope that helps some what, good luck, stay safe. i appreciate you for reaching out. it's not easy to deal with or move on from these kinds of things, but be as kind to yourself as you can. there's nothing wrong with transmanhood
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scoobydoodean · 2 days ago
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reading the notes makes me feel like im missing something about the plucky pennywhistle thing. like people are tagging it "me when i lie" "man i wish dean would tell the truth about his childhood" like. did he lie in the episode? im not saying he didnt i just. am confused. (also unless we are shown what happened, accusing dean or sam of lying about their childhood is presumption, because sam might've perceived it as "trolling for chicks" but maybe dean was hustling pool.
to be clear i do think dean was blowing off steam and flirting with girls because he was a teenager and probably was exhausted about being forced to parent his brother, but the fandom wiki could've also been remembering the fact that there's a mother in the episode who is dumping her kid at plucky's so she can work enough hours, and dean starts defending the mom, so the wiki author misremembered it as "he was working and told sam he was flirting" . reporting that as fact is Not a good idea for a fandom wiki but there's a weird obsession that sam and dean are ontologically liars or truth tellers when sam and dean lie all the time and might be reporting memories inaccurately, but they usually don't when it comes to their childhood.
like "dean did his best to parent sam despite being ill-equipped and a child" and "sam felt very lonely despite dean's persistent presence in his life and dean felt hurt when he found this out, despite this not being either of their faults" can both be true!
like sam literally lies In That Conversation because he doesn't wanna talk about plucky's! he literally says "no i don't remember it". and this is hilarious of him. he's trying to rewrite his own memory in real time i think.
Dean doesn’t seem to quite remember Plucky’s at first.
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Likely because Dean really doesn’t remember, he also really doesn’t take offense to Sam’s version of events or argue with him at all? He accepts Sam’s version (that he hated Plucky’s) as soon as Sam says so.
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Yeah, when Sam complains that Dean abandoned him there to troll for chicks, Dean says,
“It's not like I left you in jail. I mean, those places are supposed to be fun.”
But that isn’t a denial of how Sam actually felt about the place. It’s a (light-heartedly stated) defense of Dean’s own reasons for leaving him there. He thought it would be fun! If that wasn’t true, surely Dean would have left Sam at the motel and saved himself the time and cash, no? I think the fact that Dean thinks Sam liked it means Dean probably wasn’t paying attention to him at the time, caught up with his own stuff, but I don’t think it makes sense to assume anything other than that, and I think Dean is perfectly willing to accept that he wasn’t really paying attention to what Sam wanted.
Sam’s tone and the content of his complaints when telling Dean how he really felt about Plucky’s also isn’t exactly serious. He reports that Plucky’s was “lame”, ���smelled like puke”, and served grainy ice cream. He’s not exactly bringing the real tragedy to the surface here (the kid at Plucky’s with the overworked mom is much more effective at exhibiting the misery of being trapped in a children’s arcade).
The thing is, Dean really isn’t defensive about any of this? He actually just thinks it’s funny. Laughing over the phone with Sam, he says, “What in the world did they do to you?” It’s honestly kind of refreshing that Dean really doesn’t beat himself up about it. Even in the end of the episode when Dean apologizes for ditching Sam, he’s laughing (and then pranks Sam with a clown doll). Maybe that’s what sets them off? That Dean doesn’t “care” enough? Unfortunately for them, Dean was also a child who deserved his own space and was not Sam’s dad.
Totally agree with you that there’s an underlying little narrative here about overworked parents and that a wiki shouldn’t make inferences. And also about Sam and Dean’s differing versions of childhood often making sense from their own perspectives. They can both be right about their own perception.
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binniesunderworld · 15 hours ago
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How Gabriel Agreste Destroyed Adrien's Life: A 3 a.m. Analysis
From: ‘I enrolled in a school without my father's permission, I ran away from home to attend the first day of school and although I don't want my father to be angry with me, I'm not afraid of a punishment either because I KNOW there won't be one���.
To: ‘My girlfriend is alone with my father, with no one to protect her, completely defenceless. I NEED TO SAVE HER’.
One knows that his father is a good person who, no matter how angry he is, would never hurt him. The other doesn't, it's the opposite, he is no longer sure of anything, he fears for the safety of those he loves and is so terrified that he is about to have a panic attack.
But how did we get from the first to the second?
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How Gabriel Agreste's abuse managed to completely change his son in a matter of days
People don't remember this because it happened a long time ago and has not been repeated, but Adrien used to be a NORMAL person, not as perfect as he is now. While he has always been kind and polite, there were also times when he allowed himself to be a bit hostile and not as perfect as we are used to seeing him (as Adrien, not as Chat Noir). Usually that ‘good boy’ facade was only used in front of his father and Nathalie, but in front of his friends he behaved like a normal teenager, even becoming a bit teasing, self-centred and rebellious. "The Bubbler", "Animan", "Kung Food" and "Evillustrator" being the clearest examples of these behaviours, in particular towards Nino, Chloé and Marinette.
In S1 it becomes clear that the only conflict Adrien has with his father is the fact that he does not give him as much freedom as Adrien would like. Apart from this, Adrien has no other problems with him and considers him to be a good father. There are several of Adrien's behaviours that suggest that Gabriel's overprotectiveness towards him was the only thing wrong with him, but that otherwise Gabriel was excellent. It is time for us to look at that.
1. Origins
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Adrien literally enrolled in a school without his father's permission and when his father refused to approve Adrien's attendance, he ran away from home and went running to school. When Nathalie tries to convince him to come back Adrien simply says ‘this is what I want’ and turns around to continue up the stairs, not caring if she has anything else to say. He hears that someone needs help and immediately goes to their aid, and as soon as he finishes doing that he turns to Nathalie and the bodyguard with a charming smile expecting to see their proud faces, and when instead he sees that they are still angry he is immediately horrified and gives up.
This tells us a lot about Adrien: he is a spoilt child who has never been punished in his life, and when things get difficult his first reaction is to be adorable or do a good deed to be forgiven. Adrien intended to leave Nathalie talking to herself, and he wasn't worried about the idea of being punished when he got home from school because he knew it wasn't likely to happen. He then helps someone to ingratiate himself with Nathalie and the bodyguard so that they will stop being angry, and when he realises that it didn't work he is surprised. He is used to people forgiving his disobedience just because he is cute. He immediately gives up and asks Nathalie not to tell Gabriel. While he didn't want his father to be angry with him, he also didn't fear punishment because he knew he wouldn't get it.
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Later, at the mansion, Adrien realises that Nathalie did tell Gabriel and he feels betrayed, as if he didn't expect her to do that. Basically, he is not used to people disobeying him. Gabriel again forbids Adrien from going to school but it's nothing he hasn't said before: Gabriel reprimands Adrien's behaviour with words, never with punishment, and there comes a point when words are no longer enough and Adrien is no longer afraid of them, hence he becomes ‘rebellious’. The next day Adrien runs away again and, surprise surprise, he is not punished, in fact he is rewarded. Despite having disobeyed his father again, he is rewarded and allowed to go to school, even Nathalie (whom he treated very badly) offers to help him. This reward is without explanation, just because. I'm not saying Adrien deserved to be locked up for life at home, at the end of the day he's just a teenager who wants to socialise with more people, but it's clear he was a spoilt child whose behaviours both good and bad were praised, just like Chloé and Felix, so if you ever wondered why he was such good friends with them, here's your answer.
2. The Bubbler
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Here we get confirmation of how Adrien is a good boy only in front of his father and Nathalie, and how he is himself in front of his friends. At the beginning of the episode he together with Nino makes fun of his father because he does not agree to throw him a birthday party. Then, when Nino is akumatized, he at first refuses to be part of the party because he cares about Nino and wants to save him. Even when he realises that all the adults are trapped in bubbles, he never cares about his father, Nathalie or his bodyguard, only about saving Nino. And then he also gives up on this idea after a little chat with Plagg and says: "Okay, you're right. This might be the first day in my life that I actually get to do what I want for once", and Adrien joins the party without any show of consideration for the adults he knows.
Although all these behaviours were forgotten by the fandom, they are important to understand Adrien's character and how he changed due to his father's abuse. This is the normal behaviour of a teenager with a bit of a grudge: he's not a psychopath who wants something bad to happen to his father, he's a kid who knows that in the end he and his superhero partner will fix everything and he allows himself to have fun in the meantime. But it's something the current Adrien would never do, and there's where the difference lies.
3. Volpina & The Collector
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This is the last episode in which we see Adrien acting like a normal teenager. He overhears Gabriel talking on the phone and decides to spy on him, then discovers that he has a safe behind his mother's portrait and out of curiosity goes to investigate. Adrien discovers the book and takes it with him, when he is discovered he quickly makes up a lie. RIP pre-lobotomised Adrien, you will always be missed.
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This is the key point in the change of behaviour of both Adrien and Gabriel.
Gabriel confronts Adrien and he immediately gives an explanation in a tone of voice intended to generate sympathy:
—I just wanted to know what you were hiding behind that portrait that was so important.
This doesn't work so he resorts to blaming Gabriel himself:
—You.. you never told me about those things.
And this doesn't work either, so he decides to admit what he did but also looks for a way to justify himself:
—I was intending to give it back to you, I swear. But then I lost it.
Gabriel tells Adrien that he no longer trusts him, and what is Adrien's reaction? He just looks jaded and apologises to Gabriel, in an attitude that makes it clear that he is used to apologising to make things right, that he is not genuinely sorry, and also offers to buy him a new copy, confident that this will be enough for Gabriel to forgive him. This confirms the previous point: Adrien is used to getting out of his punishments just because he looks cute or does a good deed, and this became so repetitive that Adrien already knew how to get out of a punishment, and was not afraid of his father but simply tired of scolding that went nowhere. Again, there is no fear of consequences.
Everything changes completely when Gabriel tells him that this book is unique in the world, that there is no other copy. Apologies didn't work and the other form of redemption, buying him a copy, wasn't possible. Then is when Adrien's face changes completely to horror: he has just understood the magnitude of his mistake. His father punishes him by forbidding him to go back to school and Adrien is heartbroken, but does not try to reason with his father (as he had done, and many times, in past episodes). This is the birth of the Adrien we know now: from a normal boy to a submissive puppet. He knows that there is no way to redeem himself and that is why he decides not to fight, he finally realises that his actions have consequences, serious ones, taking away what is most precious to him: his freedom.
From here on we see a completely changed Adrien, from a rebellious teenager to a perfect doll with no thoughts of his own. Before, he pretended to be perfect only in front of his father, Nathalie and his bodyguard. Now he pretends to be perfect in front of everyone, regardless of whether he knows them or not. The trauma can be clearly seen: Adrien adopts this neat behaviour because he is afraid that his freedom will be taken away if his father finds out that he made another mistake. Now Adrien knows that he CAN be punished. He doesn't even allow himself to breathe in peace because of all the stress and fear he carries. And so it is that Adrien becomes a puppet unable to stop pretending even in front of his own friends: we go from an Adrien who was not afraid to react strangely to Marinette's odd behaviour, who was not afraid to tease Nino about his crush and who was not afraid to put Chloé in her place when the situation warranted it, to an Adrien who could not even keep his back bent for fear that his father would consider it inappropriate.
Gabriel Agreste being a shitty father and exploiting his son's weaknesses to profit from them
Despite being strict with Adrien, there were times when Gabriel let him spend time with his friends and have fun with them. In fact, in S1 there are several of these, most of them to be found there (before all the drama).
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In ‘Animan’ he is in the zoo helping Nino with his date with Marinette.
In ‘Gamer’ he is playing video games for the school championship at Marinette's house.
In ‘Kung Food’ he comes to Marinette's house to help her with her uncle and even takes them to the hotel and stays for dinner with them, he spends practically the whole day away from home.
In ‘Horrificator’ he spends many hours filming the movie for the school.
In ‘The puppeteer’ he is going somewhere alone and relaxed.
In ‘Timebreaker’ he is present during the race between Alix and Kim.
As you can see, despite being strict, Gabriel sometimes let his son spend time with his friends. When did this change? After the book incident. After forbidding Adrien to attend school, Gabriel noticed how heartbroken he was and realised that school and his friends were not a whim for Adrien, but something he truly cherished. And Gabriel used these feelings to manipulate Adrien. In S1, before the incident, Adrien is more ‘rebellious’ and still has enough freedom to be with his friends. In S2, after the incident, Adrien behaves much better than in S1 and still doesn't have half as much freedom as before, and when he finally gets his father's permission to be with his friends, something happens at the last minute (Heroes Day Part 2, for example). This is because his father has discovered his Achilles' heel and uses it to benefit himself and manipulate Adrien.
The clearest proof of this is in the difference between ‘Horrificator’, where Gabriel let Adrien spend hours in the school filming the movie, and ‘Queen Banana’, where Gabriel let Adrien go for only a few minutes to the filming and right after he finished his part he literally left in a cage hanging from a helicopter. It is clear the pleasure that man developed in making his son miserable.
And we could talk about ‘Chat Blac’ and ‘Ephemeral’, but I won't touch those topics as they are not part of our timeline. I'll just say that they made it clear how far Gabriel is willing to go (literally traumatise Adrien) in order to get what he wants. What I think, is sick.
Adrien's Stockholm Syndrome: normalisation, justification and romanticisation, and how it makes him vulnerable to unhealthy relationships
1. Gabriel
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We have already made it clear that Adrien became an uncritical puppet, and as a result he developed a terrible Stockholm syndrome. Adrien normalised all the manipulation, and by accepting it as something usual this caused him to start justifying it as well. Needless to name the episodes, in many of them there is always someone (usually Nino, Marinette or Plagg) who points out his father's problematic behaviour and Adrien immediately tries to justify it with ‘he does it because he loves me’ or ‘he just wants to protect me’. This shows us a big difference from the Adrien of S1 who was aware of his father's behaviour and even made fun of it, the current Adrien would never do that, on the contrary, he seems to live to justify Gabriel's actions. That's how serious the brainwashing is.
With Gabriel's behaviours now normalised and justified, they in turn begin to be romanticised. Despite being a shitty person, there are moments when Gabriel treats Adrien well: like when he hugs him (something Adrien is not used to), his worried words to Chat Noir about losing Adrien, or when he watches his mother's movie with him. These are all details that if they weren't accompanied by manipulation, anyone could call ‘cute’. And this makes Adrien unaware of the manipulation at first: his own denial and the kind details his father had for him confused his brain. Adrien did not think that his father could be so kind to him if he was a bad person, and that is why Adrien refused to consider him as such. This is a method of self-defence against dangerous situations, the feelings developed by this are not only romantic but any kind of feelings that are enough to make the victim feel safe in dangerous environments.
2. Kagami and Marinette
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Let's start with Adrigami. Adrien didn't show a strong interest in Kagami until the chapter ‘Oni-Chan’ where he even rejects Ladybug's fist to make sure Kagami is okay, but what led to this? The romanticisation of obsession and control.
Kagami is simply Adrien's friend, but when she sees a photo of him with another girl, she gets so jealous that she is akumatized and starts chasing this other girl to get her away from Adrien. This is behaviour that is bad as a girlfriend, but even worse as a friend. Adrien doesn't take this seriously and even spends the whole fight making jokes instead of worrying that one of her friends is a jealous girl who is willing to kill for him even if they don't have any kind of commitment. Then, when he sees that Kagami still has the rose he gave her, his behaviour immediately changes and you could say that this is when he starts to feel a real attraction to her, even rejecting Ladybug's fist, whom he had long been in love with.
Here we see how dangerous the romanticisation of problematic behaviour is: Adrien is willing to let go of all the chaos Kagami caused and all her toxic behaviour just because she showed that she really ‘loved him’. And he reciprocates her feelings because he finds it cute that someone is in love with him enough to go crazy. The romanticisation of Gabriel's actions eventually led Adrien to romanticise other people's actions, even going so far as to feel honoured by all the questionable actions these people committed under the justification of loving him.
Something quite similar happens with Adrinette. In S5 Adrien mentions that he started to accept his feelings for Marinette from what happened in ‘The Puppeteer 2’, and there's no way this isn't weird. He had feelings for Marinette long before that, but it was that event that led him to accept them. Marinette literally assaults a ‘statue’ just because it looks like Adrien, starts fantasizing about a life together, steals one of his hair and many other weird things, and what's Adrien's response? To say that he fell in love. He literally saw how far Marinette was capable of going because of her obsession with him, and as much as that behaviour was justified with ‘it was a joke’, instead of caring, what he does is fall in love with her... because of her obsessive and bizarre behaviour towards him.
It is honestly quite disappointing to see how Gabriel's manipulation damaged Adrien to the point of leaving him craving only unhealthy relationships because that was his perception of love.
Both victim and perpetrator
Adrien developed a split personality and a taste for taking advantage of people when he is in situations of power. Gabriel turned Adrien into a victim and a perpetrator, the role depending on the situation. When Adrien is the one at a disadvantage, he displays submissive and manageable behaviour. When he has all the power, he has no problem using it selfishly and taking advantage of others. This was taught by Gabriel, from prudence to ruthlessness, are things Adrien learned from him. And in a way that's how Adrien differs from Chat Noir: the power they possess.
Adrien is always at a disadvantage: his life is in the public eye, everything he does is always monitored by his father or his fans, and if he makes a mistake it is very easy for his father to find out and punish him. This is why Adrien, always powerless, forces himself to act submissively. He does not possess the power in such situations, so he can only act as he is expected to act.
As Chat Noir things are quite different, he always has the power. Chat Noir is a superhero, he watches over Paris but no one watches over him, he has freedom, destructive power, a city that depends on him and a partner who needs him to defeat the supervillains. He has the power. And he uses this power to his advantage.
A clear example of this is his tendency to threaten. Adrien has several times been willing to give up his miraculous and even verbally threaten (in a passive-aggressive way) Ladybug just because it bothers him that she has secrets. All of S2 was Adrien threatening to give up his miraculous if Ladybug didn't tell him her secrets, and this behaviour wasn't like ‘we can't keep hiding things from each other anymore, this isn't healthy for me and if we're not going to be honest it's best to just give up’, no, this behaviour was like ‘if you don't tell me what you're hiding, I'll give this up and you see if you can do it all by yourself or if you find me a replacement’. I understand that he was tired of the situation, but manipulation is never justifiable behaviour. Evidence of this is found in episodes such as ‘Syren’, where Adrien even threatens Plagg with give up his Miraculous if he doesn't tell him what Ladybug is hiding.
Another example is ‘Glaciator’, where he invites Ladybug to a dinner and she makes it clear that she already has plans and is unlikely to go. And yet Adrien is self-illusioned, and when his fantasies are shattered by something Ladybug had already warned him would happen, he simply accuses her of mocking him, throws a tantrum, refuses to help with the akuma, and when Ladybug comes up with a good plan to defeat the villain he guilts her by saying: ‘Sorry, Ladybug, it's not cool to play with people's feelings’ when Ladybug never played with his feelings and in fact realised these only minutes ago.
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There are many other episodes like these, too many to list. I guess the most notorious ones are ‘NY Special’ (where he has no problem being unfaithful to Kagami) and ‘Lies’ (where he also has no problem being unfaithful, lying to her, trying to provoke akumatizations and so on). His problematic behaviours are not only as Chat Noir, but also as Adrien when he finds himself in relationships where he has the power. In his courtship with Kagami he knows that she is completely in love with him and uses this to his advantage and does truly horrible things like the ones mentioned above without regard for her feelings because he knows or believes that she won't leave him. Something similar happens with his friendship with Chloé, he knows how much Chloé appreciated him and so every time she committed a bad deed he threatened to end their friendship. It's not wrong to want your friend to stop being a shitty person, and it's okay to let him/her know that if he/she continues this stupid behaviour you'll have no choice but to walk away, but the problem with this is that we go from Adrien's genuine concern for Chloé to empty threats just because, in the end, Chloé wouldn't change her behaviour and he wouldn't leave either.
Conclusions
This is not as well written as I would like it to be. I procrastinated for weeks and when I finally decided to write it I no longer had the series so fresh in my memory. I am a teenager with no professional knowledge of psychology who wrote this at 3 a.m. while I was not so sober.
This post is not salt against Adrien/Chat Noir, in all of ‘Miraculous’ there are only two or three characters I hate and none of those are Adrien, so this post is not hate towards him. While I did describe some of his behaviour in a not so nice way, that was not a personal opinion but an analysis. Like when you go to a psychologist and he doesn't give you his personal opinion but a diagnosis, the main difference being that I am not a professional nor do I claim to be one. Anyways, this is a direct attack on Gabriel Agreste for being a shitty person.
As you may have noticed, most of this analysis is based on S1 to S3. While I did mention some episodes from S4 and S5 they were not as relevant, this is because the first 3 seasons are the ones I've seen the most and ergo the ones I remember the most, maybe later (I don't think so) I'll do a part two on S4 and S5.
Finally: my personal opinion on Adrien. He is an amazing character whose development and build goes unnoticed by the fandom, this is probably because it wasn't done on purpose (if this character build was planned it wouldn't be half as good as it is, the writers aren't that talented). Adrien is just a boy, a victim of an abusive home that ingrained several of his father's behaviours within him and he has no ‘true personality’ as this depends on the situation he finds himself in. He acts this way as a method of survival and although it is not right, it is a psychological response and it is not as if he can help it. I'm really happy that the poor boy is free from his abusive father and I hope that in S6 he can be happy and get therapy.
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sileisce · 2 days ago
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it's only one dimensional when you push it towards that. just like it's only complex when you push it towards that. we can complain about timelines all we want, it's a moot point towards a highly common trope in fiction. characters fall in love quickly. not everyone wants to wait for the romance as it's usually a side plot to add to the story unless it's primarily a romance. and even then not all romances are slow burns.
the characters lose their complexity when you try to justify actions as good or evil and not view them as just existing in their own lives. mapleshade's vengeance is not a book about good or evil, who's more right or wrong. it's a book about grief. if it wasn't the complexity of appledusk accidentally killing birchface, and birchface being the son of oakstar and brother of frecklewish, wouldn't have been thrown in. every character was put in the most impossible of situations. every irrational action is done out of grief and/or self gratification(appledusk turning his back to hurt her even more for example, it's more fun to read it as a 'i want to hurt you for hurting me') he didn't see what mapleshade saw or how she was treated, how their kits were called monsters. who would throw out kits so young? he only saw that she made the kits cross the river after she was told earlier that day not to.
the kits weren't doing fine, they struggled to make it to one stone out of 3 and a final stretch to a bank. and at the end reedshine and perchpaw were there so even if he was to have trouble he truly had nothing to fear. mapleshade barely ate and was not in a good condition, she wasn't at her strongest.
and i never said any behavior is okay but; appledusk was hated for years because people never read the books and viewed mapleshade's vengeance as a cheater revenge story (when mapleshade, even in the end, wanted appledusk as a mate and that's her reason for attacking reedshine, who wasn't involved in her delusions at all). she's an unreliable narrator that twists things to benefit her (not with the intent to cause harm at the start, but because she believed everything will work out)
i really don't care when people hate characters, but i don't like when people try to dumb down what others see, or that hatred is solely because they like another (usually male) character more. even the whole 'mapleshade babytrapping appledusk' is literally the dumbest thing in existence. he had reedshine he didn't need to get with mapleshade. i literally do not value the opinions of people that hate characters like nightcloud, mapleshade, squirrelflight but love/excuse brambleclaw/crowfeather/ashfur/appledusk because they were 'sad'. too many people hate admitting their male favorites do harmful and abusive things, meanwhile the females are satan just for being snappy.
and yes when it comes to crowfeather, the defense of him and hatred of nightcloud is primarily misogyny. he was a classic 'tragic heartbroken guy'. not even once but twice in one arc. that's double 'leave my baby alone!' territory. we see how often people make the female characters villains in favor of males. i wasn't involved in the fandom for years because of the misogyny.
i hate how much nightcloud has been hated, we can compare nightcloud's treatment to how bluestar was treated because of thistleclaw. people took all of bluestar's complexity and put it on a cat who's personality is abuser just because he was a guy.
with breezepaw, he was abused by crowfeather, who had no reason to put his hands on his son, even with claws sheathed. hatred for breezepaw and people excusing that can be boiled down to people's hatred of kids which often goes hand in hand with misogyny. they hate breezepaw for being immature meanwhile are okay with a grown adult putting his hands on and berating him.
there was also no good reason for nightcloud to drag crowfeather away like that, they're just a broken family because neither cat truly loved each other. if you don't want to see complexity in the characters that's fine but many do see what they were going for and aren't afraid to elaborate on it. it's just so ruined by misogyny from both the books and the fandom. but i also i feel you can't acknowledge posts you link while at the same time trying to say the books lack complexity. even the fact breezepaw's xenophobia is directly from crowfeather being a bitter ex show's complexity.
i also feel a lot of the defense of abusive behavior by the writers is due to being older and abuse being more normalized in those generations. those generations are more likely to forgive and defend misogyny and abusive parents/partners who only apologize on their death beds.
sorry for length and if this is all over the place. i am bad at making long posts but i personally see complexity in many of the characters and while i speak up when i disagree with something, i don't want to be seen as one of the people who's so called 'enjoyment' for male characters is actually just rooted in misogyny. it wasn't my intention to come off that way. i just often see a dice where others see a coin
anyway if people are allowed to make excuses for bramblestar and fucking appledusk, I should also get to say that nightcloud did nothing wrong
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mitchywitchythings · 1 day ago
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Shoto with a s/o that takes care of their younger siblings, so much so that they call her mom instead of their actual mom and as Shoto visits her house more and more he sees they way they run to her and ask her for things and she takes care of them and one of them slips and calls her mom in front of him and he's just kinda shocked and confused on why the sibling did that and she explains that her parents really don't seem to care that they have kids and just kinda leave them to her. He also sees how she tries to balance school and her siblings and lets her just take a nap with him because he knows that she needs some sleep and is proud to have such a caring girlfriend. If you can't do that it's ok ❤️
How I Met Your Siblings
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Summary: A summary of how Shoto Todoroki met your siblings and gave you a run for your money. It’s pretty chaotic but that’s expected when you have 3 other younger siblings who you take care of day and night without rest. The literal definition of mother.
Warning: Despite the siblings call you mom/mommy you are just their sister, Mentions of cheating but no actual cheating, angst with a happy ending, implied 18+ but nothing actually happened, OOC Todoroki? The cheating part doesn’t rlly make sense I just kinda rolled with it, prideful (Y/n)
Pairing: Todoroki Shoto X Fem! Reader
Word count: 12,000 words
A/n: Thank you to my first ever request!! The whole idea is so adorable and super fun to play around with! I loved writing this and NGL it wasn’t supposed to turn out as angst or this long, I just accidentally went overboard. ALSO IM SO SORRY FOR IT TAKING LITERAL YEARS TO WRITE! School had been holding me back for so long and my love life also punched me super hard in the gut and not to mention all of my personal problems.
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1st Interaction: Todoroki Shoto meeting your siblings
“Hey, wanna come over to my house? I know you’ve been having a rough time over yours, with your dad being more pressuring with you after the sports festival?” I asked Shoto who was still keeping his books
Class had just finished, so it meant that it was time for everyone to go home. I stood at Shoto’s desk with my bag slung around my shoulder in a carefree manner. The windows to our classroom were open, letting the light from the orange sky pour into the room, a slight cold breeze was also carried in the wind, in this setting Shoto really looked pretty.
Looking up at me he spoke with a gentle smile, “Sure, thanks for your concern.”
We walked in comfortable silence to my house which was small in comparison to Shoto’s. But didn’t he didn’t know that because he had never visited my house before. While I only visited him once because his sister really wanted to meet me.
Unlike Shoto’s family… My family and I were in the middle class and they ran a hero support agency, building new gear to help heroes like Hawks and Miriko. You’d think they’d have a higher salary but unfortunately that wasn’t the case and so they work almost all day and night to earn money. Leaving me to care and fend for me and my siblings.
‘Honestly, they forgot they even have kids.’ I grumbled in my head. I sort of resented my parents a bit for that, work was always on their mind. And I didn’t blame them for that reason, I resented them because whenever they were home they didn’t seem to care for any of us.
No hello, goodnight, good morning, birthday greetings, or even congratulation on any special occasion. I could handle that, not my siblings though, I have 3 younger siblings, 2 boys and 1 sisters. All of them had unique talents and skills, all of which they wouldn’t have been able to achieve without my support. But still, I just supported them, they achieved it by themselves.
It hurts to see the disappointment and pain in my siblings' faces whenever our parents brush their talents and achievements off. And that’s why I chose to go to U.A. in the hero course. After I graduate I’ll be helping to pay and support whatever my siblings want.
That’s because my parents have to approve what kind of career we want to go into. And let’s just say, if my siblings wanted to have regular jobs like teachers, then my parents wouldn’t agree or pay for their college. And let's just say I didn’t want that for them. That’s why I need to earn lots of money and fast, for my siblings. And becoming a hero is the way to accomplish that goal, good thing that it’s my passion as well.
~~~
A sudden soft tune and vibration began coming out from my bag. I pulled out my phone, and looked at the dark screen with a picture of a young boy who had similar facial features to me. Seeing the caller ID, I didn’t hesitate to answer the call immediately.
“Hey, what’s up?” I asked, “Alright… Yes yes… Sure, not a problem… Anything else you need?… Alright then, love you too. I’ll be waiting for you back at the house and don’t take too long.”
“Who was that?” Shoto asked as his eyebrows furrowed in curiosity
“My younger brother, he said he’ll be coming home a bit late since his soccer practice is taking longer than expected. Also do you mind if we stop by a 7/11? He asked if I could buy him some onigiri.” I replied, putting my phone back into my bag.
“I don’t mind at all.” He replied in his usual monotone voice
“Thanks baby.” I gave him a kiss on the lips in surprise
“It’s no problem.” He smiled with a blush on his face, pulling me towards him by the waist.
And so we headed towards the direction of the nearest 7/11. Shoto had his arm wrapped around my waist in a very protective manner. Once we got to the 7/11, I began to go down the onigiri section, but I happened to pass by some instant soba noodles.
Knowing it was Shoto’s favorite food, I sneakily took it while he was looking at the slurpee machine in curiosity as if he hadn’t tried one once ever in his life, probably because of his father. After that I took some tuna mayo onigiri and other snacks that I knew my siblings would want and went up to the counter quickly before Shoto would offer to pay for it.
Mission successful! With a plastic bag in my hand, I waited for Shoto on one of the seats at the high table. Scrolling through my gallery, looking for pictures of my siblings. A sudden shadow towered over me, looking at my phone. Knowing who it was, I didn’t panic at all instead turning around to meet his gaze. I smiled and thanked him as he handed me a red colored slurpee, while in his other hand was a blue one.
”You never really mentioned anything about your siblings?” He questioned
I cooed adorably at that question, picturing my siblings in my mind, “Oh, you never asked plus, you don’t seem like you would hang out with kids unless you have to.”
“It’s not that I don’t like them.” He spoke bluntly
“Well then, not to worry. You’ll be meeting my siblings today.” I smiled at him, getting up and walking out of the store
“How about your parents?” Shoto trailed after me and headed off to my house.
I tensed up at his curiosity, “Well, I’ll see if they’re there. If so, I guess you could meet them.” Awkwardly sipping onto my slurpee while avoiding his gaze
He didn’t comment on my actions which I was very thankful for. We walked towards my home in an awkward silence after that, up until Shoto decided to break it. Asking if we could switch slurpees so that he could taste the flavor of mine.
I agreed to it and we switched up slurpees. Both of them tasted good, but I liked mine better. However unbeknownst to us, due to switching our slurpees. Our tongues that were supposedly red and blue, both turned violet. Something that would become very embarrassing later on.
~~~
We finally arrived at my house, it was a 2 story modern house. It looked really simple and cozy, Shoto noticed. Grabbing the keys out of my pocket and opening the door to my house, it was already around 5:30 PM. To my surprise both me and Shoto were greeted with a quiet house. We took off our shoes and headed towards the kitchen.
I was glad that my siblings weren’t causing any ruckus today but I was beginning to wonder where they were. We placed the plastic bag on the kitchen table and I stretched. Shoto had to go do a number 1, so he asked the direction of the bathroom. I told him the directions and waited for him on the living room couch.
“Hey guys, I’m home!” I yelled out, for the people upstairs to hear.
All Hell broke loose…
“Mom’s back home!!” Hikari my 6 year old sister came running down the stairs
“Hey wait up for me!” Hiroto my 8 year old brother tried to follow after her
“Don’t run down the stairs guys! You could trip and fall!” I yelled out, watching over them in concern.
My 2 siblings jumped into me and screamed out chants of ‘mom’s home’. I giggled along with them and had to pry myself off of them. Their hugs were like a vice grip, if I didn’t undergo any hero training I would have had a hard time pulling them off.
Directing them towards the counter, I pulled out their favorite snacks from the 7/11 plastic bag. Hiroto, the more introverted one out of all of us thanked me shyly with a hug while Hikari, the most extroverted among all of my siblings pulled me down to place a kiss on my cheek.
The door slammed open timingly to reveal my 12 year old brother with the exact same facial features as me except only more younger and boyish. At the same time, Shoto got out of the bathroom and entered the room who was still sipping on his blue slurpee. Only to meet Kaito who glared at him, while holding his soccer ball.
“Mom, who’s this?” He gritted his teeth, placing the soccer ball down to aim it at Shoto.
“Mom?” Shoto looked at you in wide eyes
“Kaito, stop that and I can explain everything to both of you.” I got up and ran towards them, standing in front of Shoto to shield him
“Kaito! Listen to what mom says!” Hiroto ran and tried to pull him away
“Kaito, stop being mean!” Hikari with tears in her eyes, cried comically
“Like Hell, I will! Who the Hell is this guy, with mom!” Kaito yelled, giving Shoto a full on death glare
Shoto was confused at your brother's actions, “I’m (N/n)’s boyfriend.” He spoke bluntly
“Mom’s boyfriend, like Hell will I allow that!” Kaito pushed off Hiroto and kicked the ball
All the while this was happening you yelled at him, “Kaito, that wasn’t nice! Apologize to Hiroto and c’mon please listen. He is my boyfriend and I love him very much! So please don’t kick the ball!”
I ran towards him to try to hold him back, while scolding him for pushing off Hiroto who luckily, landed on the couch with Hikari comforting him by hugging him from behind.
The soccer ball flew into the air with Kaito’s expert skills. Everyone’s eyes were glued onto the ball that was flying towards Shoto at lighting speed. I knew that I had no reason to worry for Shoto seeing as he’s very strong, but as his girlfriend and the person responsible for Kaito
I was worried for Shoto because I didn’t know what he’d think of me after this. Plus Kaito’s quirk was that he could control anything he touched for a period of time. This means that if you weren’t quick enough Shoto could very well get hit by the ball.
You activated your quirk, but Shoto was faster. He lifted his arm in front of him and aimed at the ball, which swerved to the left and with quick reflexes Shoto froze the ball completely, he bent down casually as though he hadn’t encased it in ice, he picked it up and began heating it up.
“HUH?!” Kaito yelled in shock, no one had been able to stop his soccer balls even with the use of their quirk except for me.
My siblings stared at Shoto for a minute in shock at what just happened until Hiroto recognized him, “Didn’t you place 2nd in the sports festival, just above mom who placed 3rd?”
“Yeah, yeah he is! He’s so cool with that fight with the green hair dude!” Hikari fangirled, running up to Shoto and hugging him by the leg.
“Ack- He’s the dude who literally obliterated his opponents…?” Kaito’s face became pale and he hid behind the couch
I sighed in irritation and walked towards him, “Kaito, that wasn’t nice. Apologize to Shoto then after Hiroto, now.” I said sternly
“Hah! Or else what?!” He replied in a shaky voice, trying to keep cool as he was a bit of a tsundere.
“Or else, I won’t give you your onigiri. And I’m not gonna tuck you in bed tonight.” He immediately stood up and walked in front of Shoto with an embarrassed and scared expression on his face.
“Mom, his face looks scary!” He whispered-yelled at me with a pleading face, asking for mercy.
“He’s not scary at all, Kai! He’s pretty handsome in fact, but pretty cold!” Hikari commented, while still clinging onto Shoto’s right leg
“Do it.” I replied back with a glare
“F-Fine… I-I” Taiko looked up to see Shoto staring at him a bit curious, “I’m sorry okay for trying to hit you with the soccer ball while using my quirk! But in my defense, you nor anyone will ever be good enough to be my mom/sister’s boyfriend!” He yelled, running behind the kitchen counter to shield himself from Shoto’s but mostly mine, gazes.
“That’s not what you're supposed to say!”
“Well what did you want me to say exactly?! Sorry for being an overprotective sibling and I approve of you dating-“ As Kaito went out of his hiding spot to storm towards you, he slipped and hit his head on the floor.
Shoto who stood in front of me trying to get me to calm down previously and tell me what my sibling did was okay and he was just being protective of me. I literally shoved him and ran to my sibling, placing his head on my lap and crying frantically. Looking over for any injuries or signs of concussion.
Shoto who stumbled back from me shoving him off, caught his balance and walked towards you. Activating his ice and inspecting the big bruise forming on my siblings head. There wasn’t any blood so that was good at least.
“An Angel…? No it's even better, mom?” He blinked, tears pouring down from his face from the pain.
“Yes! Are you alright?! Please stay awake, we need to make sure you don’t have any concussions! Shoto put your ice on him, please!” I cried frantically, not being able to keep my composure when it comes to my siblings.
“Did you and that guy?” He glared at Shoto though thankful for the icy cold hand on his bruise making it feel better, “Drink any slurpees, specifically red and blue?” He asked seriously
“Yes…? Why…?” My eyes widen in surprise and the tears stopped as well because of this
“I noticed them… And why are both your tongues violet?!”
Shoto stood silently with a blush while he watched me in slight amusement trying to explain why both our tongues were violet, “Huh?! It’s not what it looks like I swear! We just swapped-“
“Curse you peppermint candy! How dare you taint my mother! She’s still a virgin!”
“Kaito!” Me, Hikari, and Hiroto yelled in unison at him
“I’m glad.” Shoto added bluntly, making me dive my face into my hands in embarrassment
That was the first time Shoto had ever met my siblings and went to my house. After that, he began coming to my house more and more often. Finding himself liking it and feeling more comfortable there than in his own home.
2nd interaction: Todoroki Shoto meeting his s/o’s parents
Shoto was at my house again, this time he had already been here a few times before and met all of my family, except for my parents. Not until now.
Both my parents walked out of their office and walked past me and my siblings while Shoto was in the bathroom. They completely ignored us but in respect we greeted them politely. We were about to go out separate ways again had it not been for my siblings wanting their attention. It can’t be helped, children will always crave attention from their parents.
“Mother, look nee-san has a boyfriend and she brought him today.” Hikari said excitedly, trying to get a response from her biological mother
Notice how she said mother instead of mom. Hikari being the youngest one out of all of us, hasn’t really accepted that our parents don't really care for us. I mean we did try to hide it from her, shielding her from the harsh reality, but I think she’s starting to catch on.
“Is this true?” My mother gave me a questioning look
“Yes…” I looked away, trying to avoid everyone’s gazes
“Concentrate on becoming a hero and keeping the Family prestige, we’ve already begun to downgrade ever since the business wasn’t doing quite well with our competitors having more recent technology while ours has begun to downgrade. We simply don’t want you having any distractions which will lead to your downfall as well.” My father said sternly, looking at me intensely with tired eyes
“Who is this boy?” My mother questioned me crossing her arms in front of her chest
“I’m her boyfriend, it’s nice to meet you Mr. and Mrs. (L/n).” Shoto suddenly stood besides me which startled everyone, he gave out his hand for my father to shake
My fathers eyes narrowed as he shook Shoto’s hands making my anxiety rise to the top, “(Y/n) never mentioned she had a boyfriend, how come we’re only hearing about this now? Also how’s your father doing with him being number 1 now, is he interested in some support gear?”
“Aren’t you, Todoroki Shoto? Son of Endeavor?” My mother pushed me aside to inspect Shoto
“Yes, miss.” Shoto replied, slightly uncomfortable at the mention of the number 1 hero.
“(Y/n), we approve of him.” My mother turned to look at me for a second then back to Shoto, “Does your father or his sidekicks need new gear? We’ll be giving out discounts since you're my daughter's boyfriend as long as you guys buy in bulk.”
“Mother, please. I think you’re making him uncomfortable.” I pleaded, trying to push my siblings out of the hallway and back into their rooms whilst trying to get Shoto out of the very uncomfortable situation.
“Nonsense, (Y/n). You should have introduced us to your boyfriend sooner.” My parents began giving Shoto more attention than me or my siblings had ever received in our entire life.
“We should have a formal dinner, getting to know each other. Todoroki, you should invite your family.” My father interjected
“We have a free schedule on this Thursday, there’s a new restaurant that opened near here. We should go there.” My parents began to overwhelm Shoto
‘Shit! What do I do?!’ I screamed watching my parents like hawks as they corner Shoto, who didn’t like the situation one bit but still held an unemotional expression. I could tell because of how his eyebrows were scrunched up and his eyes drifting towards mine, pleadingly.
“Mom, we got this.” Kaito, being the angel he was whispered to me
Relief overtook me as I ran and grabbed Shoto by the arm making a dash towards the front door, “Thanks, I owe you one.” I winked at them
Not a problem, Kai mouthed back. Walking towards his biological parents, ready to deal with their lecture and scolding. Internally I was super guilty and grateful to him, he always had my back and loyalty. All of my siblings do.
3rd interaction: Todoroki Shoto getting to know Hikari
“Nee~ Hikari, since your older sister is becoming a pro hero won’t that mean she’s going to leave you?” A girl who wore the same uniform as Hikari spoke out
“Mom becoming a pro hero is the coolest thing ever! But I know that she’ll ever leave me and my siblings, she just wouldn’t do that!” Hikara countered, not liking where the topic was going
“But Hikara, surely you know how busy pro heroes are and haven’t you heard your sister is aiming to rank in the top 10?” Another classmate of Hikara with blonde hair pushed Hikari a bit, trying to pull a reaction from her.
“Yeah, I know about it and I completely support her! But she’d never forget us! She’s our mommy!”
“Hey, how about this instead? To prove your sister isn’t gonna ever leave you, how about you and your sister come to my birthday party next week, this Saturday? She can also bring her classmates like Red Riot, Deku, and Froppy!” The blonde-haired kid shook Hikari harshly and cornered her into a nearby wall.
In fear Hikara began to stutter, voice breaking as her eyes began to gloss, “I-I don’t think that’s a g-good id-ea… I recall h-her saying how she’s g-gonna be really-… busy with her internship…!”
Turning on her quirk, the blonde kid got into a fighting position, “Look, I don’t care about that. Figure something out or else I’ll ruin your reputation and no one will want to be friends with you. I can assure you, you’ll be completely alone like a loser!”
“Stop it! You’re scaring me!” Hikara began to cry as she cowered into the corner wishing that her mom was there to comfort her.
“Look, she’s crying!”
“She’s going to go back crying to her sister!”
“Why’d you even call your sister mom again?!”
“That’s because her real mom doesn’t care for her!”
“You’re such a loser!”
“The only thing cool about you is your sister!”
“And you said you wanted to become a pro hero like your sister! Yet you can’t even defend yourself, how much more other people!”
The six girls began to circle Hikara like vultures about to pounce on their prey while they chanted words of insult towards Hikari. They activated their quirk and were about to use them when suddenly Shoto, who was heading towards the direction of your house, just happened to walk by what was happening.
He immediately recognized Hikara’s terrified voice and immediately intervened. Speaking sternly in a low and scary voice while glaring at the girls to get out, not before apologizing to Hikari. In response to Shoto’s scary face they jumped, apologizing to Hikari then running away from the scene.
“Stupid kids…” Shoto mumbled under his breath, “Are you alright? Do you have any injuries? Please stop crying. I've already dealt with your classmates.” Shoto grimaced, not really sure what to do about his girlfriend's crying sister.
“I was s-so scared!” The little girl ran into Shoto’s arms, hugging him in comfort
“Please calm down.” Kind of flustered at the situation, he awkwardly patted the girl on the head, hugging her back stiffly.
“T-Thank you, Todoroki…” Shoto’s heart warmed at that, your sister really was polite and adorable.
“No problem, if you ever need any help. I’m always here for your family.” He gave the girl a small smile as she began to finally calm down, “We should inform your sister about this as well, are you alright with that?”
“N-No… I don’t want mom to worry or have any more burdens…” Hikara tightened the hug
“You know you’re not a burden, especially towards your sister. I’m sure she’ll feel glad that you’re being open towards her.”
“Mom is taking care of us already, that’s more than enough. Please don’t tell her, I’m begging you.” She clutched onto his hand, giving him the best puppy eyes she could muster up.
“Alright, I respect your wishes. I won’t tell your sister but please try to be more open to her. What happened back there was really serious.” He sighed, slightly frustrated that he couldn’t tell you since it was about your sister whom he knew you cared greatly about
“It’s okay, it was my fault after all…”
Shoto doubted that, he couldn’t see everything that happened; he only got to the part where they ganged up on her, “How come?”
“They wanted me to bring mom and her friends to Misturi’s birthday next week. But I can’t because you guys have internships next week! So I told them about that and they didn’t like it! I’m sure I have no friends anymore and that I’m uninvited to her birthday!” The little girl huffed and began crying again
Shoto sighed at her explanation, “Listen, Hikari… None of it is your fault and based on what you just told me. None of them were your true friends to begin with. I guess they only like you because (Y/n) is becoming a hero. But that’s fine because not everyone is gonna like us or be nice to us. Some people use us for their own gain and that’s fine because we just have to distinguish those people and we’re also not alone. We have other people who’ll help us no matter what, the right person will come at the right time. And they won’t use us, they’ll stay by our side and those people are our real friends, and it doesn’t matter if those people are our family or outside of our family as regardless they’re our real friends and you can even consider them as your own family. Do you get me?” He hugged the little girl who reminded him so much of you as he gave a speech
“Hmm, I see… Thank you…” The girl hummed in response to Shoto’s little speech, “Can we still not tell my mommy about this though? She’s already stressed out as much as it is and I just want to forget about this. Can you p-promise me?” She sniffled as she held out her pink for him to take.
“… I promise.” Shoto didn’t like keeping secrets from you but she respected your sister's wish and so he’ll uphold it, “Hop on my back, I’m sure you’re tired so I’ll carry you home while you sleep.”
“Alright, thanks.” It didn’t took long before the child fell asleep on him
Walking back home, Shoto was slightly amused and worried about how frantic and panicked you looked when you realized your little sister hadn't returned home until you saw her fast asleep on Shoto’s back. The relief that flooded your eyes when you saw that she was safe and sound. Tears almost poured out even, you helped Shoto settle her onto her bed, to continue letting her sleep in peace.
“Thank you Shoto, I thought something had happened to her!” I cried into his arms the moment we stepped out of Hikari’s room, “I don’t know what I would’ve done!”
“Shh… It’s alright, nothing gonna happen while I’m here. I’m always here to help out and watch out for you and your siblings.”
“Thank you again, it really means a lot...”
“It’s no problem, I love you.” He kissed me
“I love you too.” I pulled him into the kiss even harder
4th interaction: Todoroki Shoto getting to know Hiroto
When Shoto had failed his provisional license and was forced to retake it along with Bakugo and the other students. Camie, the blonde girl from their competing school wouldn’t stop blabbering flirts left and right, specifically targeting Shoto.
Shoto being the dense bitch he is, never noticed a single thing. However, a certain Hiroto who was part of the class that Todoroki and the others were assigned to, noticed. And he was livid about how Todoroki didn’t really turn her down, but sometimes indulged in her questions.
Unbeknownst to Todoroki and the others that Hiroto was a part of this class, they continued to go on about their lives. Hiroto who usually never joined in on the class antics, because of how he was so introverted around his classmates. But his whole quiet nice guy personality did a full turn.
When it came to his mom, he’d do anything for her! And what Camie did, flirting with his mom’s boyfriend took things to a whole new level of personal. He was going to make her life a living Hell. Hiroto decided to keep his identity a secret in order to observe how Todoroki would handle the situation.
When Hiroto saw that Todoroki never really did anything, well you could say he wasn’t only pissed at Camie. He was going to do his best so that hero Shoto would not be able to receive his hero license and of course this revenge plan wouldn’t be complete if he didn’t include Camie. He had another devious plan for her…
“Hey, Todoroki! What’s your number?” Camie asked Todoroki right in front of the class they were supposed to correct their behavior.
“Why would you need it?” Shoto questioned in confusion
“Tsk!” Bakugo interrupted, immediately spotting Hiroto in the crowd of students but decided not to say anything.
It was easy enough for literally anyone to figure out that Hiroto was your sibling from looks alone since you looked exactly like him, just in the opposite gender. Hiroto was giving Shoto the death glare from all the way in the back of the class.
It was like bloodlust was pouring out of him, Hell even some of his classmates and including his teacher steered away from him. In fear of becoming the receiving end of his soon coming outrage.
‘Tsk, icy-hot good luck dealing with your girlfriend's brother, I respect the kid thought since the first time I met him. He’s definitely out for your blood.’ Bakugo thought proudly, looking at Hiroto with a smug smirk whilst the little boy continued to throw deadly death glares at the dual-haired boy. ‘Oh, this is gonna be so much fun.’
Time skip
Hiroto's quirk was the ability to control earth elements, mostly the ground but it would expand the more he develops. A very powerful quirk which he has yet to be able to control, he however was able to practice it a bit whenever you were home and not busy.
Those times were his favorite times with you since none of his other siblings would get to hog you to themselves since you’d be so busy tending to him.
So while Todoroki who was somehow dense enough not to notice the death glares being thrown at him from Hiroto. The usually behaved child (More behaved than the rest of his class) began to conspire and strategize with their class leader ways to make sure the heroes will bend to them.
Starting of with the chaos from the class, they began to use their quirks. And bully Shoto about being Five Wennies, a nickname Hiroto will definitely tell Kaito about so that they can bully him afterwards as well. Within the chaos Hiroto continued to hide and blend in with his classmates as to not be discovered. And he also made an agreement with his friends to do their best to make Camie fail.
When one of female children with brown hair tied in a ponytail started to have a crush on Five Wennies that’s when Hiroto turned his back on her. And they began fighting over who gets to date Five Winnies, her or his sister. Even though Hiroto was mad at Todoroki, he couldn’t help but feel inclined to defend him for his sister. The fight was a childish feud, had it not been for the fact they were both using quirks which could lead to someone getting seriously injured.
The teachers informed Shoto to take care of it, knowing the relationship of the kid and his girlfriend. Everything went ballistic between the two children so Shoto had to use his quirk to dissipate the fight and tension. Dark gray smoke covered the area and Shoto was still yet to discover that the one causing so much trouble was Hiroto. Multiple coughs rang through the air along with some groans and moans when the smoke finally dissipated everyone stared intently and anxiously about what was gonna happen next.
“Hiroto what are you doing?” Shoto asked in pure confusion at the boy
“Getting revenge!!” He yelled, quickly standing up and running at him
A large boulder hurled at Shoto, but having more experience in fighting than the child. It didn’t take much of his energy to stop it in its tracks with his ice. The dual haired boy was shocked and confused to say the least. Out of all your siblings, he expected Kaito to do something like this.
Hiroto ran around the iceberg and was exhausted at this point. There wasn’t much he could do before he’d pass out and Shoto knew it. The little boy had overused his quirk and this was the result of it. So quickly Shoto ran up to the boy as well, meeting him in the middle just in time before he fell to the ground.
He caught him in his arms and looked at him in worry, his eyes were barely open and a fever was forming. He knelt to the ground while still carrying the boy to make it easier for him. Hiroto was still fuming with hatred for the dual haired boy but was barely awake at this point. In his frustration, he did the only logical thing a kid would do. He cried, in fact threw a tantrum.
“How dare you!” The boy cried, punching Shoto weakly in the chest
“Hiroto calm down. You’re forming a fever and way too exhausted from overusing your quirk. Go to sleep.” Shoto spoke calmly but panicked on the inside
“No! You’re cheating on my sister! I hate you!” He barely croaked out with a shaky voice.
And with that Hiroto had finally succumbed to his fatigue. Slight tears formed at the corners of Shotos eyes at those words. He didn’t know why Hiroto thought he was cheating on (Y/n)! But it hurts like Hell to ever think of hurting (Y/n)! And the look on Hiroto’s face when he stared at Todoroki was one filled with resentment, a look that reminded Shoto the one he gives his father everyday. Never ever, would he think of physically or emotionally abusing anyone! Especially (Y/n), his own girlfriend! He’d rather die instead of becoming his father!
And so Shoto froze at that, his heart shattering as he realized that despite not cheating he had hurt Hiroto immensely, by something he didn’t even know what he did. Shoto traced back to his mind the memories of what he did within this day, had he forgotten to say I love you to you before he left? Had he accidentally insulted you with his blunt comments? What?! Just what was it?!
Unbeknownst to Shoto, Bakugo knew what the fuck was going on from the beginning as he knew what social clues were. And he was absolutely livid to think that one of his friends from the Bakusquad got kinda unintentionally cheated on, not really since there weren’t any intentions but it’s for the plot and I don’t know what else to do lol. And so Bakugo walked up to Shoto and punched him across the face. Luckily Shoto didn’t punch back or stumble as he still had Hiroto in his arm and instead glared at him, furious why he suddenly did that.
“Icy-hot, that bitch Camie flirted with you and you didn’t even realize that. You even engaged in it without realizing it, are you that fucking dense?!” Bakugo yelled
“Damn it. I didn’t…” Shoto replied honestly while placing his right hand on Hiroto’s forehead activating it and effectively bringing his ever growing fever down
“Then take the fucking hint and fix up your shit. I’m not going to help (Y/n) if she ever comes crying to me about this. You’re in deep shit.” The blonde boy growled
Time skip
Todoroki got his shit together and finished their retake successfully and avoided Camie at all cost this time like she was the plague but by this time she didn’t care as she had already scored his phone number and was in belief that she had a shot with him despite him already telling her he’s dating the most prettiest girl in the world. Apparently in her words and eyes which kept roaming around his body, making him extremely uncomfortable, that his little girlfriend didn’t need to know anything if only he kept his mouth sealed which he quickly shut down again.
Bakugo’s words of threat never left his mind, he knew that the boy was just looking out for you as you were a part of the Bakusquad and still his classmate as well. Shoto was anxious and scared shitless of what was going to happen next as he waited in the infirmary for your little brother to wake up, never leaving his side once. It didn’t take much longer before Hiroto finally awoke and saw Shoto sitting in a chair waiting for him with great anticipation. His right leg bouncing up and down in a fast rhythm to an unknown song.
“I don’t want you here, get out you cheater!” Hiroto yelled with a scratchy voice
“Listen, I can explain-“ Shoto began but was cut out
“I don’t want to hear any of your pathetic excuses! You knew how much we trusted you yet you cheated! You liar!”
“I won’t leave until you listen and you can’t make me leave.” Shoto replied calmly, his emotions more stable than earlier having already thought the situation through.
“Ack-!” The little boy groaned as he was unable to his his quirk now that he’s over used it, “Fine, I’m giving you 2 minutes tops. Don’t make me regret it.” He finished, growling slightly
“I didn’t grow up with the best figures in my life and because of that I lack the necessary social skills.”
“Yeah, and what about us? You see my parents caring about me and mom or even my siblings?” Hiroto was beginning to sound more and more like Kaito rather than himself
“I have a sister too, but unlike (Y/n), my sister Fuyumi wasn’t as successful as bringing our family together. It means I didn’t have a sister teaching me what’s right or wrong, I hadn’t realized that Camie was flirting with me and that I engaged with it. I only thought about it as her asking questions to be more knowledgeable about us. I was wrong and I realize that now. I should have told her that I was dating (Y/n). I’ve already talked about it to Camie and set her straight, although I haven’t talked about it to your sister.”
“Fine. You’re excused but this is the only time you get a get out of jail free card. And don’t think we’re immediately buddies now, you’ve got to earn my trust now that you’ve broken it.” The little boy growled at him
“I’ll be sure to do my best to earn it back.” Shoto replied with the most apologetic tone he could muster up, “And don’t worry I’ll be sure to tell your sister the truth.” He grimaced, worried about your reaction and if he had put your relationship in danger.
“You’re such a dumbass and asshole, Icy-hot. She’s sensitive about those, one word about it and she’s dumping you. I’m not even sure if you’ll be able to explain yourself.” Bakugo said as he strode in the room.
“Watch your language, Hiroto is still a child and I won’t tolerate you saying those in front of him.” Shoto growled at Bakugo, glaring at him and warning him not to do it again.
The said boy only scoffed in response, “Tch. Whatever.”
“It’s fine… But I also have to say that I agree with what Bakugo-san said, you see my sister is fearful about anything related to cheating.” Hiroto added, looking down in his lap worried for his mom.
“What do you mean?” Shoto questioned as far as he was concerned he was your first boyfriend and you never had much experience in the dating community.
“That bitch didn’t tell you as well, great just fucking great.” Bakugo rolled his eyes, “The only thing I know is that she had this thing with a guy but they were never able to get together as another girl came into the picture. Ever since that she’s been sensitive about that shit.” Bakugo huffed in annoyance.
“I see…” Shoto responded quietly, not really sure what to do with this information, “I don’t want to keep this from her but if what happened earlier hurts her then I’d rather keep it to myself.” Unconsciously Shoto gaslighted himself into believing it was fine to not tell his girlfriend he accidentally flirted with another girl.
“I’d rather keep my moms mental health standing strong.”
“Tch. Whatever.” Just as quickly as he entered, the blonde boy left the room promptly, silence following him.
“Hiroto, get some rest. I'm taking you back home in a while.” Shoto spoke, breaking the silence of the room and pushing the boy's shoulder back into the bed.
“Hey, uhh…” Hiroto began shyly earning a hum from the dual haired boy, “Treat my mom right, okay? We love her a lot and I’m giving you my trust on this”
“Of course, I never want to hurt your sister. I love her as well.” Shoto smiled gently, “Now sleep, you’re sister is worried about you.”
After that interaction, Shoto went out of the room for a bit to call his girlfriend to let her know that her brother was in the infirmary but is currently doing fine. He knew that you over worry about your siblings all the time even for the smallest of reasons, one of the things he loves about you.
But still in his heart, he’s guilty and feels absolute remorse about what happened. All he can think about is that it’s all his fault for being dense. Not being able to express his emotions well or tell what other people’s thoughts, emotions, and emotions are when it comes to love. In these times is where he truly renounces and feels hatred for his father and his doings. In these times he wished he never had a quirk to begin with, he’d rather be poor and quirkless than be born to a monster who disguises himself as a hero.
Ring…
Ring… Ring…
Ring… Ring… Ring…
With each ring Shoto’s anxiety and guilt rose up but being known for concealing his feelings and being unemotional it wasn’t hard at all to hide all of that guilt. Though it still ate him up, and it would be only a matter of time until he breaks or perhaps someone else does the break or better yet spilling some information on him to his beloved girlfriend.
“Hey Shoto! Are you done with your retest already? You should come over to my place. I'm making dinner and it’s cold soba, your favorite!” The girl cheered happily
“Hey, (Y/n)… Thanks, I'd like that a lot…” His heart cracked at the thought of you making him his favorite good for dinner, proving to him just how much you love him while he went behind your back.
“Is there anything wrong? You don’t really sound like yourself?” You questioned in worry, ready to do whatever it takes to help him feel better.
“At my retest… we were supposed to reform a class as the students were out of control but it turns out that class was Hiroto’s. He got in a fight with his classmate which resulted in him overusing his quirk and fainting.” He said almost breaking down from the guilt, in his mind the only thought that was running was that he was turning into his father for hurting someone he loved.
“WHAT!?! Why didn’t you inform me earlier! Is he alright! What exactly happened! Nevermind! I’m heading there instead, I’ll meet you in 5-10 minutes! By-“
He wiped a tear off his face and pulled himself together, clearing his throat he put an unemotional expression on with quite difficulty, “(Y/n), love.” Shoto said in his most calm and sincere voice hoping that it sounded as real as possible, it ultimately resulted in making you calm down as well and bring out your rational side, further pulling at Shotos heart how much he had an effect on you.
“Ack- Shoto…” I start to tear up, unable to understand why my brother had to go through that, “My brother he’s a good kid, he has never gotten into any fights before or-“ My emotions become overflowed and overwhelming that I just sobbed hysterically, “God! What kind of sister am I if I can’t keep an eye on my own siblings! I’m such a failure.”
At this point Shoto’s guilt had eaten him up so much that he was going to explain everything from Camie down to Hiroto arriving at the clinic. But in the back of his mind, he was reminded of Bakugo’s and Hiroto’s. Of how if he tried to tell you what happened, more specifically about him flirting with another woman no matter how unintentional it may have been, would result in his ass getting dumped. He in fact didn’t want his ass getting dumped so he did the most stupid thing he ever did in his life, and that was not listening to his gut instinct.
“Love, he’s alright and don’t worry you’re doing the best you can do and it’s more than enough. It isn't your fault at all, alright? I believe that your brother just got into some disagreement with his classmate about you. He just wanted to defend your name so once he gets home don’t lecture or get mad at him. Okay? And don’t worry I’ll be the one to bring him to you so just prepare dinner, we’ll be there on time.” Shoto said in his sweetest voice he could muster, bullet swears running down his face in anxiousness.
To Shoto, it felt like this was his most dangerous mission he’s ever taken and will ever take and that one wrong word would ruin it all.
“I-I… Alright, I’m just worried about him, you know? Thank you, baby. I’ll wait for you guys.” He could hear you wiping away your tears but your voice still continued to crack but despite that you pushed through and smiled gratefully at him through the phone.
Shoto smiled, thanking the heavens that he managed to not get his ass dumped today. But let’s just see how long he’ll keep this secret up, because as we all know the truth always comes out one way or another…
That night he brought Hiroto back home to you on his back, like what happened with Hikara. It gave him deja vu when he saw you fussing over Hiroto to make sure he wasn't harmed in any way, all the while profusely bowing down and thanking your boyfriend for taking care of your sibling.
Though his heart shattered at the thought of hurting you and not being able to apologize for it. For fear of losing you for the rest of his life. It scared him shitless. People came and left his life, but of all people he just couldn’t let you go. You're his first girlfriend, his first love! You’ve already left a mark in his life and no matter what he does it won’t ever change. He felt so selfish, he loathed the feeling. A part of him wanted you to choose someone better, someone who isn’t as dense as him, someone who didn’t have a lot of emotional baggage, someone who didn’t have a big ugly scar on their face…
But despite feeling all that self loathing, no matter what, he’d do anything to make you not leave him. He’d hate himself even more. His love for you was for eternity. It’s completely endless! So please! Don’t go and leave him and take his heart with you! He’s been through Hell and back through his entire life, so please just… Don’t leave…
In these moments, Shoto felt like he was exactly like his father. He hurt the ones he loved and didn’t apologize for it. His heart cried internally, but outside he kept a poker face, it was one of the things in life he was great at since a very young age. He learned to separate his inner turmoil with his emotions and with time he got so great at it.
Shoto after that began to gaslight himself into believing that what he did was right, and that he was just over thinking things, in truth he could bare the pain in his heart for hurting you, if he didn’t he would have rather stabbed his heart for daring to even hurt you, he was supposed to protect you. He promised that much to your siblings and to think he believed that he was a man of his words.
Look at him now… Turning back on those who he loves and loves him. God… He was his fathers son after all, perhaps he was just as arrogant as that tyrant, perhaps he abused those around him without even realizing it. It felt like all the progress he had made led him back to where he was at the sports festival right before finally Midoriya snapped him into reality with your help of course.
A hopeless boy, a boy filled with hatred, a boy who despite having everything at the touch of his fingertips was never truly happy… Shoto began to lie to himself that evening when he gave you a big and tight hug and pulled you into an unexpected but not unwelcome kiss, one that he poured all his passion into.
That night Shoto began to whisper sweet words into your ears nonstop and began to be more open of his love to you. It was weird of course, Shoto was never the open type to be so open about being affectionate. This was the first time he was really being affectionate, making you wonder what happened but you decided to keep your mouth shut wanting to enjoy the moment and attention since you guys did something that only you guys should know about as you both enjoyed a fiery passionate night. Something you’d regret in the future.
5th interaction: Todoroki Shoto getting to know Kaito
A few weeks after that night had passed and Shoto had already forgotten about the Camie incident but still he was trying his best to make it up to you, giving you surprise gifts and being more open and affectionate. Something you took gladly without hesitation, not questioning it’s his true intentions. Shoto walked into your house and was looking for you, for your date.
You told him you were home and to just let himself in through text, your last message being around 8-10 minutes ago. As Shoto began to search where you were in the house, it never occurred to him you could have been taking a shower and that you were that’s why when he knocked the door and no one responded, he immediately assumed you were there. Not being all to hear the running water from the shower.
He gave up and assumed that maybe you were talking and hanging out with your siblings in their rooms so he first went to Hikari’s, then Hiroto’s, and lastly Kaito. Kaito who was still going through puberty had a very high voice, somewhat similar to yours making him think that it was your whimper he heard coming from the room.
He knocked 3 times politely on the door, “W-Wait-!”
It was too late and Shoto had already opened the door. Kaito was on the floor in front of his bed in a arms wrapped around his knees in a cradling position, looking at a piece of crumpled paper resembling that of a card in dispiritedness.
“You’re not supposed to be here, get out…!” Kaito’s voice cracked, he was still crying, yelling out in frustration at Shoto.
“What’s wrong?” Shoto asked, disregarding Kaito’s initial words
“Get out…!” Kaito yelled and wanted to literally push Shoto out of his room himself but he didn’t have the energy to do that so he scoffed and rolled his eyes at his moms boyfriend, “… Tsk… Whatever just don’t tell anyone else what you saw, especially mommy.”
“Why not?” Shoto asked calmly
“Because they don’t deserve this!” Kaito burst out crying once again.
Shoto felt guilty for not leaving the room in the first place, disrespecting Kaito’s privacy but in the end Shoto recall you saying to him multiple times that your siblings meant the world to you and if anything bad were to happen to them, you wouldn’t know what to do.
And it seemed like something bad did happen so Shoto would need to rely on his hero instincts to get him through this mission seeing as his Emotional intelligence wasn’t as high as his intellectual intelligence.
Sitting down next to the boy Shoto asked paitently and calmly, “It’s alright, you can vent to me if you want and I promise I won’t tell your sis- your mom.”
Kaito groaned and sighed in defeat, “Fine, if you do I’ll make my mom hate you.” His threat was real and filled with malice
“I promise.” Shoto patted his back in comfort
“I-I… I’m going back…” Kaito swallowed his pride and a single year was shed, “A grade. I failed in a single subject so now I’m being held back… I-It’s just not fair! I studied! I r-really did! But I failed! I’m such a disappointment! A bad kid!” Kaito yelled out hysterically and wrapped his arms even tighter around his legs.
Shoto gulped and tried to remember what his mom did to him as a kid to comfort him whenever his dad hurt him with all those harsh training. He scooted even closer to Kaito and hugged him, Shoto was stiff of course but he was doing his best by saying that it’s alright and there wasn’t any need to cry over it and going a grade isn’t a big deal. And no one is disappointed in him, he did his best and that’s all that should matter.
After a while Kaito finally seemed to calm down and was actually appreciative of what his moms boyfriend did for him.
“I guess, you’re not so bad after all…” Kaito whispered to himself
6th interaction: Todoroki Shoto and his s/o breaking up and getting back together with the help of his s/o’s siblings
We were at the (L/n) household, Shoto was upstairs playing ang keeping all my siblings entertained while I was downstairs making us all snacks. It was late in the afternoon when I heard a phone vibrate in my pocket. Instinctively I grabbed it and unlocked it only to realize it wasn’t my phone, Shoto and I must’ve switched accidentally. I laughed slightly at the realization until I saw the notification that popped up. It was a text message and I knew it was wrong to invade Shotos privacy but before he didn’t mind me using his phone without his permission until recently which made me a bit suspicious.
Unknown: Hey Shoto! Are you still up for it? Your girlfriend doesn’t need to know after all🙈👀
Shoto: Sorry, your contact isn’t saved. Who is this?
Unknown: Silly boy! Good thing that you’re hot!!🥵 It’s Camie!! Remember the girl from the retake for the hero license?
My eyes widened in panic and fear as she I remembered exactly who she was.
Shoto: Of course, what is it that you want?
Camie: I was wondering if you’re still up to sneaking in my dorm tonight, my bed feels empty babe😭💔
Camie: *Sends a risky photo of herself*
Shoto: *Seen*
Shoto: Fuck you and your ugly ass!! I never want to see you ever again so get lost bitch!!! Be a home wrecker to someone else’s relationship and btw good luck when these photos get out😈
Camie: *Seen*
I dropped the phone on the counter and immediately started fuming, trying my best to stay calm as I immediately picked it up and screenshotted the conversation and sent it to my own phone through email so Shoto wouldn’t have noticed. It hurt so damn but I was angry too, so angry at Camie that at that moment I only wanted revenge. I thought that I didn’t have the heart to send out her photos but damn was it tempting right about now. But of course, I was a hero in training, I wouldn’t actually do it.
I calmed myself down and that’s when I remember that it takes two to tango. And I was livid at him right now but I also couldn’t bear the thought of losing him or hurting him, I loved him too much too. To dedicate yourself to someone only to find out that they were cheating on you behind your back with the same girl as all those years ago. And what’s even worse was to give yourself to that person, only then did tears begin to pool my eyes.
Old insecurities and bottled up feelings came pouring out of me and the next thing I knew was that I was sobbing quietly on my knees since my siblings were distracted watching a movie on the TV loudly. Only then is when Shoto came running down worriedly as if he had this instinct to know if I was in trouble. He headed towards me with my siblings following suit once they heard him come down and that’s when they saw me crying. Shoto was panicked and confused as to why I was like this and was about to hug me in comfort whenhis eyes landed on the phone on the counter and he realized that the inevitable finally happened, the truth got out.
“(Y/n), please believe me it’s not what it looks like!” Shoto begged
“Everyone except Shoto, I want you up right now and blasting music in your rooms. Understand?!” I yelled through tears and demanded for my siblings to head upstairs, embarrassed to have been caught by them when I was breaking down.
They complied immediately and ran back upstairs to their rooms and Shoto walked towards me carefully and hesitantly as if one wrong move would make me disappear.
“Shoto! Why?! How could you do this to me!!” I screamed through stutters as my voice cracked
This was the first fight we ever had and also the first time I ever yelled at him, “(Y/n) please let me explain! I’m begging you!! I can’t lose you!!” The usually calm and collected boy was gone in an instant, replaced by a desperate man
“I think everything has already been explained! Out!! I want you out of here!! And we’re over, I never want to see your face ever again!!” I yelled at him through tears
Before he could say anything but internally his heart and brain was screaming at his to do something. I grabbed his phone and pushed it onto his chest and grabbed my phone from him while dragging his ass outside and locking the door behind me.
“If you ever thought you could disrespect me like that! Think again Todoroki! So that’s why you’ve been acting strange these days!! Was that all I was too you? Some girl you could use as a body in your bed? Is this why you’ve been giving me so much attention recently? Cuz you can’t handle the guilt of fucking her!!! Am I a joke to you!! Did you really fuck her then me?! I bet you’re happy now and break to leave me now that you’ve had your fill!! Why couldn’t you keep it in your own pants!!” I yelled behind the door so quickly that he couldn’t interject and explain
“NO- love please don’t call me by my last name, it me Shoto.“ His voice boomed in desperation as his tears threatened to fall down his eyes, “(Y/n) you aren’t a joke to me and I highly respect you!! So please believe me when I say I didn’t cheat on you! You have to believe me! And you aren’t just someone I sleep with, you’re my girlfriend for crying out loud! I love you so much, I didn't use your body for anything, you have my word!”
“Love? You forfeit all right to my heart when you decide to cheat so how can I believe you? When the truth is staring right in front of me!? And wow Shoto you really know how to hurt me, of all people that’s the girl who you choose her! The girl who I was replaced with!” I sobbed even more at that
Shoto's heart felt like it was being stabbed and broken into a million shards of her words, “(Y/n)! God! Please listen to me, there is nothing that happened between us!!”
“Shoto do you even realize your actions doesn’t reflect your words? You slept with me only a few months ago right as the same time you started acting weirdly too affectionate, it adds up Todoroki!”
“(Y/n)! Please listen to my explanation and don’t open the door!! Just please! Nothing happened between me and her, it’s only you. It’s always only been you! I’m so stupid and I’m so sorry for everything!! This is all my fault!!”
“Oh! I made sure of that, good luck getting back with that homewrecker when all of this is over. You know, I hope you guys are soooo happy cuz whatever comes around goes around. I hope you know that Camie also sleeps with other guys on the weekends and that you’re just one of her playthings!! You know what I regret it all!!” I fell silent immediately though at his desperate choked scream
“No!!! Don’t say that, don’t say you regret it! Please I love you so much, that it hurts!! Please don’t regret anything, don’t regret loving me or giving yourself to me! I'm so so sorry!! (Y/N)!! Can’t you understand!!?? I love you and only you!! I never went to Camie or anything like that!! It’s still my fault though!! At the retest she kept flirting with me but- but I was so dense that I didn’t notice it and so when she asked for my number she gave it to me! After I realized what she was looking for I immediately shut it down but she wouldn’t listen and she wouldn’t take no for an answer even when I told her I had the best girlfriend in the world!! So please I’m really sorry (Y/n), I am begging you to believe me because I can’t live in a world without you in it!! My heart feels like it’s breaking into a million pieces just seeing you cry and even worst knowing that it’s my fault. I know I’m selfish!! But please. I don’t have anything else to look forward to in this life without you!! Before I met you life was dull and I was only trying to get through each day. I had never smiled or laughed so when I met you, you gave me happiness and unlocked a hidden part of myself that I didn’t know was buried!!” Shoto bawled his eyes out and served his raw and fragile heart to me as his emotions were borderline unstable, his emotions hugging high and wild
For some reason, my pride wouldn’t allow to see anything but red, “Run back to her then if you need some company!!” I was too angry to listen to reason, the feeling of betrayal and heartbreak overcoming anything else
“You’re so damn stubborn! But listen to me because you’re not hearing what I said! Becoming a hero is my dream no doubt and my goal but what’s the point if at the end of the day, all I’m fighting for is nothing. No laughter to return back home with, no delicious meals to look forward to, and even your siblings I love them all.” One could hear the desperation in his voice as he cried out
“Don’t bring my siblings into this… Why? Why then did you not tell me?” My voice was dry and weak from all the crying
“(Y/n)… We thought it was for the best that you didn’t know since you’re so sensitive to those kinds of topics. We just wanted to protect you…” He flinched
“We? Who the hell is we?”
“Me, Hiroto, and Bakugo…”
“You let a child decide? My brother especially? That seems like such a power dynamic. Thanks for informing me, I’ll get the real truth from him then. But aside from that, it wasn’t your decision to make! It wasn’t any of your decisions to make! I deserved to know the truth!! If that even is the truth!”
Shoto pounded on the door with his head, “It’s the truth! I swear to God it’s the truth so please (Y/n), just let me in! We can figure this out together, just- You need to trust me.” He was way too disheveled
I ignored him and from behind me all of my siblings who appeared of nowhere to hug me, “Guys… I’m so sorry you had to see me like this. Don’t worry, I’m strong.” Then I turned to Hiroto who was desperately clinging onto me, “Hiroto, please stay out of decisions like that. Understand?”
Tears welled up in the boys eyes, “Mom… I-I I’m so sorry! It’s not his fault it’s mine! I promise you, he’s telling the truth!! So please blame me, not him!!” The child wailed, tears finally broke down from his face as he kept pulling at me
“Hiroto. None of this is your fault, do you understand. Just please next time, let Todoroki deal with his own mistakes. He’s a big boy now.” I tried my best to calm him down, rubbing his back and whispering comforting words
“Mom.” Kaito spoke from behind me and rubbed my back as well in comfort, “Just get some closure and talk to him. Properly this time, no yelling just listen to his side of the story.”
“Kaito… It’s not that sim-“ I was cut off unfortunately by Hikari who jumped from behind me and hugged me tightly, crying her eyes out as well
“Talk to dad!!” She begged me to
“Dad?!” My eyes widened at the realization she called Shoto dad
My heart broke at their reactions and I knew that they were right but I didn’t want to let down my own pride but then again my siblings were the only people who could ever change my mind, I had to confront him one more time and actually resolve this issue but that didn’t make it any easier, “I-I… Fine… I’ll do it.” I got up and opened the door and walked out still hoping that he was still there waiting
I put a brave front and hardened myself and my emotions. I knew that despite Shoto being sorry for what he had done, my jealousy, insecurities and pride got the best of me and I couldn’t exactly control myself. On the steps connecting the house to the ground was where Shoto sat, who dove his face into the palms of his hands, still crying and broken over the breakup.
“Shoto. I’m out here to talk to you as per the request of my siblings so I suggest you don’t waste this opportunity.” I glared at him from behind with tears in my eyes
He turned around and before I could react he lunged at me with a hug and picked me up while stuttering out words of apologies, “I won’t d-do it again! I’m so s-o so s-sorry!! Please take me back! I swear I didn’t do anything with her, I was too dense to realize her asking for my number was her way of flirting with me! I never used yoh for your body or anything, I love you genuinely because you’re you!!” In front of me wasn’t future Pro Hero Shoto but just Shoto who was genuinely sorry for what he had done
My stone cold heart melted at his apology and the way he cried to me made me just want to hug him back and forgive him so I did just that, “I-I forgive you. I’m also at fault here for not telling you how sensitive I am to those topics and for also over reacting too much without actually listening to you.” I wailed in his arms as I finally hugged him back, “I was just so hurt and scared that you’ll run off to Camie cuz she also stole my ex-crush while he was trying to court me so I thought that she’d also be able to steal you from me. I didn’t want that but I instead pushed you away with my anger and everything went downhill!!” It felt good to release the truth, my shoulder felt light as well as my heart.
“I-I had no idea… it okay too, it honestly was my fault, I shouldn’t have even entertained her.” Shoto got on both of his knees and looked down in shame, “I’m so grateful that you’re taking me back but I feel like I didn’t apologize enough, I’ll do my best to make it up to you. I promise you that.”
I gave him and bittersweet smile and pulled him up, “It’s okay, I know you’re kinda dense, sorry. But yeah, you didn’t mean to do it. And I’m sure you were scared for my reaction about finding out about what happened and just wanted to protect me. Shoto, I forgive you so please stop blaming yourself.” I kissed him right after to which he immediately kissed back.
“I love you, you don’t even know how much but I love you with all my heart.” Shoto brushed my hair with his hands
“I love you too, to the moon and back” I kissed him once again
7th interaction: Todoroki Shoto realizing it’s time for a new beginning to start
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On a peaceful Saturday morning, around 4 PM. The sky looked bright with barely any cloud covering up the sun, on days like these Shoto felt grateful for. With all the troubles he and his precious girlfriend went through over their years in U.A. they finally reached their end. Their final stage before becoming fully fledged heroes. And because of that, their school work had been piling up with no end.
You would’ve gotten it done easily the moment they were given but you were juggling and multitasking from focusing on your studies, hero training, and taking care of your siblings. So Shoto decided to just give you the break you deserve by hauling you over his shoulders and walking in the direction of his dorm room. All the while your siblings, who you snuck in the dorms following behind the both of you, giggling and making jokes about your dark eye bags which you responded by throwing a slipper in their direction but purposely missing. Shoto laid you on his futon and just ordered you to sleep much to your protest, but when your siblings jumped in as well and cuddled up to you to sleep, you decided that a couple hours of getting some sleep would be a really helpful recharge.
In the beginning of their relationship it was sweet and puppy love but throughout the passing time and harsh trials they were put in, especially with the third party incident back in their first year. It made his relationship with (Y/n) even stronger than before, making them try to understand each other and not just directly come to conclusions when a problem arises. It also made them more open to each other since, wanting nothing more than to never feel that sort of heartbreak ever again.
Looking around in his dorm room that had changed a lot throughout the 3 years his been in U.A. There were the 4 (L/n) siblings sleeping peacefully on his futon. Had you told him this was the sight he’d find himself in back in his first year when he was going through his rebellious phase he would’ve laughed at you. But now he couldn’t be more grateful of the sight as he secretly hid a small box with a ring in it in his underwear drawer that he had kept for years now, just waiting for the perfect moment to hand it to you. As he knew from the beginning he started dating you, you’d be his first, last, and only lover he’d have for the rest of his life. And he wouldn’t have it any other way.
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Against the Kitchen Floor (Will Wood)
And I swear! I will die trying!/I'm still in the process, but I'm making progress; I promise I honestly wanna prove improvement's possible, I swear!/I'm so fucking sorry! I'm not a good person, I'm barely a person at all, But someday I'll be perfect, and I'll make up for it all!
Less rare than scarce, less diamond then rough/Unlikely to be more than just the coal you failed to crush
I'm catatonic in your arms, crying, "How did I cause so much harm?"/I'm down pounding my head against the kitchen floor/Apologizing for my life and ever entering yours
The vertex of my redemption arc/I’m searching on that virgin heart
"The raw emotion! And I strongly relate to desperately wanting to improve for someone you love. I belt out this song when I feel really hopeless"
"my one OC. also me. also it's just a really good song. one of will's best imo. screaminbg"
"Literally hits almost all of my self-esteem issues. Feeling like people only care about you for your body? Check. Not understanding why anyone would want you? Check. Thinking that all you do is hurt people? Check. I don't cry very often but this song DEFINITELY made me teary"
"one of those if u aren’t paying attention to the lyrics ur like this is nice but once u hear them its an OW holy OW and guilt and I’m sorry feelings"
"Just. Loving someone but not feeling like you’re good enough and trying to improve."
"Not only does this song have lyrics that are deeply relatable to me, but this song also feels very deeply personal to the artist and I feel that anyone who listens to it for the first time has that same feeling of getting punched in the gut. Just the lyrics and the melody and Will Wood’s vocals make this song an absolute masterpiece and I cry every time I hear it."
"One reason I'm attached to this song is because my friend sent it to me and said "I'm kin assigning you this song" and ruined my life (/j) It messed me up because I've always had a hard time in my life figuring myself out and dealing with my emotions, and for what feels like the first time, this song has been able to near perfectly describe how I feel about myself and my impact on other people, and it always just meant so much to me that my friend who sent it to me knows me better than I know myself and shared the song with me and I love them dearly."
Fast Car (Tracy Chapman)
You got a fast car, I want a ticket to anywhere/Maybe we make a deal, maybe together we can get somewhere/Any place is better, starting from zero got nothing to lose/Maybe we'll make something, me myself I got nothing to prove
So I remember when we were driving, driving in your car/Speed so fast, I felt like I was drunk/City lights lay out before us/ And your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder/And I-I, had a feeling that I belonged
You got a fast car/Is it fast enough so we can fly away?/We gotta make a decision/Leave tonight or live and die this way
"I know it's an obvious one but YOU try playing it without crying I dare you"
"I cant explain the yearning but this makes me howl"
"OH GOD the longing!! The yearning in the recurring central image of the narrator and her lover on the highway, feeling this sense of limitless possibility and incredible hope!!! And then the verses take us with brutal efficiency through the collapse of their marriage, the way that the cycle of poverty stomps down on their hopes, and how with nothing left, the narrator does what her mom did and leaves!! Leaving the kids to experience the same thing she did growing up!! But it’s all punctuated and bookended by these callbacks to that central iconic memory of hope!!!!! But by the end we realize that the last line “leave tonight or live and die this way” offers only the illusion of a choice: when the narrator first runs away and later when she leaves her husband and kids, she’s still fulfilling her role in this cyclical generational story. God!!"
Against the Kitchen Floor submitted by @pixopolis + others
Fast Car submitted by @smallboyonherbike + @uchihasasukeofficial + @all-our-exploring
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tiredandoptimistic · 1 day ago
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Wait now I’m so curious on why you don’t like the Sebastian demon blood plot line !!
I mostly find it frustrating because of how it intersects with the overall themes of TMI.
Jace spends a lot of the early TMI books being treated as though he's some sort of villain because he's Valentine's son. Even Maryse, his adoptive mother, basically throws him out because the memory of Valentine is more powerful than the seven years she's raised Jace for. (She of course comes around by the end of COA, but that initial reaction was still there, and it still hurt Jace deeply!) Valentine himself did everything in his power to increase this feeling in Jace, and tried to position himself as the only one who could possibly understand and love Jace, while also setting Jace up to see himself as a monster because of his attraction to Clary. (There's literally a scene in COA where Luke says that Jace visiting Valentine is proof that the rest of them failed, because Jace clearly feels that the closest thing he's got to an understanding parent is the genocidal maniac). All of this is compounded when Jace learns that Valentine treated his son with demon blood, because suddenly he's got this proof that he's tainted not only by Valentine but by Hell itself. I haven't read COG in a little while, but I remember there being a scene where Jace and Clary make out, but Clary realizes that indulging in the incestuous relationship is basically Jace's way of punishing himself. Being into his sister is just a natural extension of being part demon, and if he allows himself to embrace his worst instincts then he won't have to worry about trying to be good anymore.
And then of course, we learn about Sebastian.
Jace was never the baby with the demon blood, that was Sebastian. Jace gets to learn that not only is he unrelated to Valentine and Clary, he's also got angel blood in his veins. Suddenly he doesn't need to worry about his girlfriend being his sister, and he's safe from the inherent evil that he thinks must come along with demonic contact.
While I do find Jace's internal angst and the ways in which he responds to be very interesting, the thing that bothers me is that rather than accepting that it's not his blood that defines him, he learns that he got good blood instead of evil blood. Sebastian on the other hand did get the evil blood, and so he is inherently evil. The story could have been about how the way that you treat a kid does more to determine their behavior than the way they were born, but instead it seems to reinforce Jace (and everyone else's) initial assumption that whoever has demon blood must be cruel and unfeeling.
Now, I know that a lot of people will claim that Sebastian wasn't inherently evil because of the demon blood, and that it was Valentine treating him as a demon that caused him to turn out that way; but that's just not how I remember it being treated in canon. Again, I haven't read the relevant books in a couple years, but I'm pretty sure that Sebastian is said to be the way he is specifically because of the demon blood. Jocelyn held him in her arms after giving birth, and saw something evil brewing in the eyes of her newborn. That scene could have meant that Jocelyn saw how Sebastian resembled Valentine and reacted in horror because of her feelings towards her husband, but I don't think that's how it was intended by the author. I also remember specifically that "True" Jonathan Morgenstern is treated as a different character in several instances (such as having his own flower card), and this "True" version of Sebastian has green eyes like Jocelyn and Clary and also isn't a terrible person, because he's not influenced by demon blood.
So basically, what I'm saying is that the demon blood storyline bothers me because it takes agency away from the characters. Sebastian is evil because he has demon blood. Jace thought he might be evil because he might have demon blood, but he doesn't have demon blood so he's not evil. It all seems to go against the main thesis of TMI, which is that children are not defined by their parents (and are in fact very capable of rejecting the bigotry their parents believe in). Everyone in the TMI gang is treated as a foil to their parents, and because we know that their parents bought into bigotry at a young age, we know that the kids could very well make the same mistakes. It's all about free will, and how they learn from history to do better in the future (Robert, Maryse, Luke, and Jocelyn all became far better people in middle age than they ever were as teenagers, but because Alec, Isabelle, and Clary have them as examples, they don't have that dark era at all. Stephen died before he could change though, and Valentine lived to prove that he didn't want to change. This puts Jace in a far more complicated position, which is why he clung to the Lightwoods as his true family to guide him towards the person he wants to be). That's a side tangent but I typed it out so I guess it's staying.
Anyways, yeah. I think Sebastian is one of the least interesting villains in TSC, because he isn't given the free will to choose villainy. (This is also why I'm less interested in demonic villains like Belial and Asmodeus). I still do enjoy how he acts as a foil to both Clary and Jace though.
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