#Schlatt headcanon

[storiesforallfandoms]

surprising ted and tucker during chuckle sandwich ~ jschlatt h.c.

warnings: rpf, just fluffy, but also some swearing

"i received a package in the mail today that said i could not open it until the next chuckle sandwich episode"

ted is holding up a white envelope, luckily smart enough to aim it away from the camera so that his address isn't accidentally leaked

"from who?" tucker asks.

"from schlatt and (y/n)."

you and schlatt are completely stone faced

well, schlatt is

you have a little bit of smile tugging at the corner of your lips

you and schlatt had been waiting ages for this, and when ted finally messaged you guys to say he had gotten the package, it was like christmas had come early

you had indeed written on the envelope "do not open until the filming of the next chuckle sandwich"

ted tried to get answers, but you were both adamant that he had to follow the instructions

"it's gonna be something that scars me for life, isn't it? like you guys sent me a picture of schlatt's penis in the mail or something"

"honestly, if that's the prank, that's some dedication"

you watch as ted carefully opens the envelope, pulling out a card with an orange cat on it

"oh, he kinda looks like jambo. is this about jambo? are you announcing you got rid of him?"

"dude, don't say that! i just got people to stop saying he died and was replaced by kubo!" from schlatt

ted is hesitant to open the card

but when he does, something falls onto his lap

he picks it up

looks at it for a second

his eyes go BIG

tucker asks, "what is it?"

ted turns it to show the camera

it's a sonogram

of a little tiny baby, that looks no bigger than a peanut

tucker also takes a second to realize what it is

but when it click in for them both, they're both yelling, "what the fuck?!"

the shit eating grin on schlatt's face is priceless

you're giggling at their reactions

they're both trying to get out their questions, but it's all loud and overlapping one another that it's basically inaudible

finally schlatt said, "hey! shut up for a second!"

and they both do

"welcome to chuckle sandwich"

[pequins]

IRL P0RN VISUALS 🔗

cont : slimecicle , ted nivison & jschlatt .

MDNI NSFW AHEAD

all vids are from twitter , you might have to log in to see them.

( more to be added when i find them )

SCHLATT

a/n : he looks so fucking good in this video im gonna chew on him

schlatt giving you a punishment for being a brat

( LC ) schlatt jerking vid

teasing / c^nt slapping

sub!schlatt org4sm denial

CHARLIE

c^nt slapping

against the desk

size difference

TED NIVISION

f!ngering

p^ssy eating

size difference

[exactlymaximumgarden]

schlatt with a celebrity s/o. maybe you're famous from acting, from music, streaming, modeling, literally whatever. either way, you're famous in your own right.

so imagine schlatt is doing a simple gaming stream, specifically another drunk truck simulator. he has media share turned on to entertain himself while on the road, and his viewers are submitting the usual stuff they know will make him laugh. however, one submission throws him for a loop.

it's a thirst edit of you.

schlatt has to stop a second and watch, ogling at the screen as the edit plays. "god damn," he softly mutters under his breath. meanwhile, his truck slowly starts drifting to the wrong side of the road, half of chat laughing at his reaction and the other half screaming at him to pay attention to the drive.

"who sent that in? who sent that? that is- ope." schlatt quickly veers back into the correct lane. "that is not funny. do not send me edits of my girlfriend while i am on the road, okay?" he can't help himself as he starts dissolving into laughter. however, his cheeks have very visibly heated up. "i am not a distracted driver, chat! i will not become one of those... those drunk crashers they warn you about."

this, of course, only enables chat further. more and more edits of you are flooded into the media share queue, and every single time, schlatt can't take his eyes off you. he tries to play it off by laughing, yelling "STOP!" at chat, but he secretly loves it. any opportunity to admire you is a welcome one. however, finally, he pauses his game and playfully scolds the viewers.

"guys, guys. look, i love looking at (y/n) as much as you do. i do. but i really need you guys to curtail it for tonight, alright? i'm gonna flip the fuckin' truck again if i keep takin' my eyes off the game."

he squints at chat as the responses come flooding in.

"someone said, 'you know you like it, sclit.' i know i do! you got me, man, i do! my girl might kill me if i set a bad example on the road, though. y'know how it is."

[blushk1tten]

schlatt, who’s secretly married to you. he’s very diligent about making sure his wedding ring is off and hidden whenever he makes content. then, the fuck, marry, kill episode of chuckle sandwich happened, with tucker showing off his wedding ring and ted showing off all of his rings. when ted challenges schlatt to “bling himself up, like a little slut” in the future, schlatt decides it’s finally time. so, the intro to the next episode is schlatt showing up with his wedding ring on and showing it off.

“yeah, i got this ring a while ago. don’t know how much of a slut it makes me, but i’d do anything f’ my partner.”

[darkniters]

jschlatt who whispers to you

twitch dot tv slash jschlatt is online, and you’re well aware due to the loud personality voice schlatt has put on in the other room.

“WHAT THE FUCK!” he yells, the sound echoing throughout the house. you usually check into his streams, but right now your busy figuring out your hours for work and are in no need for distractions.

you look around the living room quickly for a red pen, needing to circle something on the page, but your efforts deem useless. you suddenly remembered schlatt took one into his office with him to do a bit.

you didnt want to find a different red pen because you knew where that one was, so you quietly make your way down the hall before schlatts office.

his fans figured out about you through a lot of bits schlatt would make where he would tag you on twitter or tag any girl he posts on instagram with your username, so you weren’t a private couple, but you still weren’t twitch or youtube public.

you open the door timidly, trying to bring as little attention to yourself as possible. unfortunately for you, the shitty tiktok schlatt was watching just ended, and his spiel afterwards was done.

his head whipped to your direction, and he gave you a grin. you gave him a smile back, and he reached his hand out for you to grab.

you grab ahold of it and make your way behind his chair, head resting on the back of it as your hands snake their ways around his neck.

he speaks briefly to his audience, as he rocks the chair gently from left to right, moving your head along with it. before he looks up at you, eyes full of stars like he’s seen the greatest thing of the entire universe.

“whats wrong?” he whispers, gently. its not a breathy whisper, its just making his voice quieter so the mic can’t pick it up as well (it does still pick it up)

“i know you have a red pen in here and i really need it” you whisper quieter, the mic unable to hear you at all due to you being farther away and also a lot less loud than schlatt.

“oh right yeah,” he reaches to the left of his desk, and grabs the pen. “just be careful its a bit finicky.” he mumbles. his hands reach up to where yours rest around his shoulders, and he gently brings it to his lips, kissing the back of your palm gently.

you smile, take the pen from his grasp, and then peck your head down to kiss the crown of his head, his hair ticking your face. you then break away from him, and thats when you remember he was still live. your face briefly flushes.

schlatt also seemed to have forgotten, as he stares at you grinning as you leave, before he brings his full attention back to the screen. the chat is running like crazy, simply saying your name in all caps and many awws. schlatts cheeks are painted red.

“alright alright chat moment of weakness, lets get a move on.” he continues to stream, but it seems after that encounter; he seemed much happier for the remainder duration of the time live.

[nvmadic]

schlatt just waltzing into the kitchen, slapping your ass with a sharp sting. hand lingering on your waist, his pelvis pressing against your ass. “mm, dinner smells nice, bub.” fingertips digging into your side, eager to have you in his hands. one hand snaking up your loose fitting shirt to cup your breast in his large hand. “can you hurry up so i can fuck you?” softly muttering, his desperation evident in his squeezing. “or, i can pull your shorts to the side and fuck you whilst you’re being a good little housewife, hmm?”

[ohbabydollie]

Y'know that thing Austin and Schlatt do whenever they irl stream, they see each other and one of them begs for a kiss or just says "C'mere" and they start making out and one day during an irl stream where everyone is drunk asf

y/n perks up from her seat and watches Austin and Schlatt fake make out for the nth time and yells "ME NEXT ME NEXT!!!" Everyone laughs it off until She stumbles drunkenly and points to her lips, "My turn!!" And Schlatt just smirks like a psycho and they start ACTUALLY making out and everyone on stream starts screaming and laughing, saying shit like "OH THEY'RE ACTUALLY... CUT THE CAMERAS!!!"

and Schlatt stares straight into the camera and says "Nah, keep it rollin' wanna get home and rewatch this millions of times." (Maybe he even mumbles in your ear how he'd pump one out while rewatching the clip)

i got an ask similar to that so i’m killing two birds with one stone

“actually, before we do” austin walks over to schlatt, kissing him drunkely

you look over and gasp “when’s my turn?” you say getting up excitedly as schlatt chuckles

“come ‘ere” he says laughing, pulling you towards him

what you expect to be a quick little peck on the lips turns into a make out, schlatt pulling you in closer, groping at you softly.

you let out a soft gasp and he take the chance to slip his tongue in

everyone around the two of you are freaking out, laughing with small shouts of “no way” and other words

that is until someone yells “cut the cameras”

schlatt parts from you, you take it as a sign to go but he keeps an arm on your waist

“nono, keep ‘em rollin, i need somethin to pump one out to” he says grinning and going in a for another kiss

[writingduhh]

Chuckle Sammy || Falling Asleep In His Lap (HC)

(In this HC you fall asleep on their lap at a party / get together)

Leave me some detailed or vague fic requests or HC ideas plz I’m all out and I need some inspiration 😭😭😭

❥ Jschlatt:

▷ The second he notices you’re asleep he goes protection mode.

▷ He won't allow anyone within a 5-foot radius of you, fearing that their presence might wake you.

▷ He knows how hard you’ve been working lately and insists that you catch up on sleep, even if it’s at a party.

▷  Whenever someone close to you makes an obnoxiously loud noise, he'll respond with a stern glare and a finger to his lips.

▷ He tenderly traces soothing shapes on your back or arms with his fingertips.

▷ Definitely takes this opportunity to take some silly pictures. Using Snapchat filters or just terrible angles and lighting

▷ He will take some wholesome pictures too, of course. Spamming his snapchat story with your face.

▷ As the night progresses, and people get louder he makes the call to head home.

▷ He doesn't bother waking you up; instead, he simply scoops you up in his arms, carefully carrying you out to the car.

▷ On the drive home, he ensures the car stays at the perfect temperature, keeps the music volume low, and skillfully navigates around any potholes.

▷ Once home he takes it upon himself to get you ready and into bed.

Once home, he takes it upon himself to get you ready for bed. Carrying you inside from the car, he softly lays you down on your shared bed, while he rummages around the closet to find one of his hoodies for you to wear. Gently he’ll change you out of your party outfit and into his oversized hoodie, possibly waking you up in the process.

“Hm? Where are we?” You mumble very confused by the chnage in surroundings.

“Shh we’re home now toots, let’s finish getting you ready for bed.”

You easily complied as he instructed you to lift your arms, then he pulled his hoodie over you.

"There we go," he says, his voice now deeper as he too was growing tired.

Together you both cuddled up together in your bed, falling asleep nearly instantly.

❥ Ted:

▷ Once he realizes you’re asleep he goes full mom mode.

▷ He'll take care to delicately adjust you, making sure you’re comfortable and preventing you from waking up sore.

▷ Looks around for a blanket. If he can’t find one he’ll use the jacket/button up off his own back to keep you warm.

▷ I can see him being the type to still mingling around at the party as you sleep on the couch but he’s never more than a few feet away from you, constantly looking over and checking in

▷ If he's not up and mingling with other partygoers, he's right by your side, talking casually to those closest to him, running his hands through your hair, and tracing your face as you lay on his legs.

▷ As the night winds down and people start to leave, he'll softly wake you, ensuring you're okay and offering a refreshing glass of water.

"Y/n, come on, it's time to go," Ted softly spoke, gently rubbing your shoulder.

"Hmm?" you grumbled, slowly sitting up from where you lay on the couch.

"It's getting late, hun. We should probably get going," he explained, offering you his extended hand.

Slowly, you grabbed his hand and rose to your feet, resting your body against his.

He let out a soft laugh before saying, "Would my tired baby like a piggyback ride?”

You nodded, rubbing your eyes. Swiftly, he bent down, allowing you to climb up onto him before securing your legs with his arms. Sleepily, you laid your head against his shoulder, the subtle movement of his walking occasionally swaying your tired head.

▷ Once to the car he softly places you in the passenger seat, buckling your seatbelt before placing a soft kiss on your forehead.



[know-its-for-the-better]

living w schlatt hcs

guys im down so bad this week and with today's p.o. unboxing i fear it only got worse. anyways i just had a bunch of thoughts ab what it would be like to live w schlatt while y'all are dating. so these are my hcs. (also i am like incredibly new to writing original material so lmk if this is any good fr)

-this is not the first or last time this will be said but this man is an ass grabber. as soon as he knows it's something you're okay with? he's doing it. not in public, bc in my head he's not big on PDA, but when you're at home? every time he passes by you it's a grab of the ass and a big cheesy grin and he sometimes even a kiss on the cheek

-again, not the first time anyone has mentioned this, but this man is giant. 6'4. so he's def a big fan of the hug from behind. he likes to tower over you and kiss the top of your head. whether you're cooking, cleaning, looking out the window, or admiring jambo on his cat tree; he will come up and squeeze you into a hug from behind with no warning.

-"toots, come here rq" just to ask for a kiss while he's working or editing. simply as motivation to keep going. he says "it's like a reward" and you happily oblige.

-since he doesn't really stream anymore, he doesn't play a lot of video games, but when he does, he lets you sit in his lap as long as you sit still and don't distract him... (obviously you do sometimes... not your fault you have needs and he looks so cute when he's focused...)

-the drunk chuckle sandwich episode had me thinking about you playing bartender for him and making him different drinks to try since he usually just drinks straight from the bottle. he would say some shit like "i'm ngl i didn't know you could make it taste that good." bc nobody ever really bothered to make him try different cocktails until you

-super domestic dancing in the kitchen to old music. duke ellington and etta james and all different kinds of jazz and old love songs, it doesn't matter bc he is spinning you around and kissing you softly as it plays in the background while he sings to you.

-not to be cringe but he would sooo be into that thing those couples do when the smaller partner says "uppies!" and then the other one picks them up. except it would just be a look you give him and putting your arms out with a grabby motion and he would know.(bc im sorry the thought of saying uppies makes me wanna gag) he would pick you up and carry you around like a koala with your legs wrapped around his torso AND he's happy to do it. but just at home bc like i said he's not really into pda.

-he would so take candid pics of you at golden hour. you'd just be in the living room looking out the window with jambo or {redacted} and admiring the sunset and next thing you know there's a disposable camera or the little girl camera right in your face. he would so say some stupid shit to get you to laugh and then snap the picture. but once he gets one, you force him to hop in the frame while holding the other cat so you can get a cute little family pic while the lighting is good. obviously, you made it your background within the next ten minutes. and he made his background the candid picture of you the second he got the pictures onto his phone.

ok so hi!! i hope these fed you a little im so incredibly new to this whole writing thing but this was a lot of fun for me so if you have any suggestions i think my ask box is open? idk how those work but im sure i can figure it out. thanks for reading i know i yapped quite a bit LMAO

[bree-cheesy]

Friends to Lovers HC's for Jschlatt

Sfw and Nsfw (minors fuck off)

Guys, maybe I'll be consistent in posting. Doubt it, though. Yikes. Again, tried to keep it gn!reader. I'm not super used to writing gender neutral so I'm trying my best 😭

Again, writing another person? Be proud?

Now some headcannon's for Mr. Jschlatt himself:

Sfw:

Definitely the friend that hates everyone else except for you.

"Hun, you're just the only good one. What can I say?"

Just let's himself in your house/apartment whenever he wants.

Jambo loves you more then him and he acts like he hates it, but secretly loves watching you shower Jambo with attention.

"Yeah, you can just fucking keep him at this point."

Fake pouting, but smiling like a dorky school girl when you aren't looking.

Sudden realization he's in love with you when you're making him a new recipe for dinner you found online because you know he doesn't like to cook for himself.

Sweet nicknames that make you a little dizzy when he says them.

Accidently confessing his feelings for you when he was drunk at your place after you made him dinner for the third time that week.

Lots of tears and apologies for not saying anything to you before.

"I'm so s-sorry, sweetie.... I'm a horrible friend."

Giving him little kisses on his cheeks after saying you feel the same.

Passing out on your couch together and waking up in your bed after he moved the two of you in the middle of the night, his arms wrapped around you, snoring like a bear in your ear.

------------------------------------------------

Nsfw:

Feeling a not so little something pressing against your ass while he snores.

Wiggling a little, hearing him groan sleepily in your ear and feeling his arms tighten around you.

"Hun, you can't keep moving like that..."

His deep morning voice>>>>>> rumbling through you're body and making you whimper.

Him slipping into you from behind, tweaking your nipples while slowly moving in and out of you.

Slow lazy morning sex.

Soft grunts and moans as he thrusts into you.

"Mmm, fuck, baby.... So fucking good around my cock like that."

Falling asleep again with him still inside you.

[storiesforallfandoms]

sitting on jschlatt's lap ~ h.c

warnings: rpf, some swearing, fluffy fluffy goodness, a little mention of smut but not much

he pulled you onto his lap the first time

you and a group of your friends were hanging out at someone's house, and you had gotten up just long enough to go to the bathroom

when you came back, someone had taken your seat

and there was no other available places to sit besides the floor

"move your feet, lose your seat"

schlatt had patted his lap and said, "i got a seat for ya here, toots"

you didn't think he was serious because, at this point, you weren't dating yet

but, as you tried to walk past him, he took hold of your waist and pulled you down onto his lap

you face was on fire the entire time

but he was so casual about it

it only took a week after that for the two of you to start dating, and every chance he could get, you were on his lap

he was streaming and wanted you to join? you were sat on his lap

watching a movie together? on his lap

hanging out with friends? his lap

fucking you stupid?

well...you get the point

he loved to have you on his lap so he could hold you

believe it or not, schlatt is a very affectionate guy when he's in a relationship

his love language is definitely touch, i'm calling it now, so he'd be touching you whenever he could

but especially he needs you on his lap, with your head on his shoulder and his arms around your waist

that's his favorite position for anything, full stop

[pequins]

boyfriend jschlatt headcanons ── .✦

[ req open ! ]

• very clingy, (will insist he’s not) he loves physical affection in small and big ways, whether it’s a hand on your back, squeezing your thigh, crushing bear hugs or just being around you, he loves it.

• He’s not one for public displays of affection, if anything, he’ll hold your hand or give you quick pecks on the forehead or cheek.

• despite what most people think, he’s not that jealous, he’s very secure in your relationship and trusts that you both only have eyes for each other.

• overprotective however? absolutely. you’ll often have to listen to his small rants about doing things that could get you hurt; taking care of yourself or being safe when he’s not with you. even if he does the same things

• He isn't afraid to call you names or make jokes at your expense, but he’s careful to never say anything you could perceive a serious insult.

• he’s not good with words, it’s hard for him to properly express his feelings for you outside of physical contact and gifts. he’ll show his devotion through his own unique love language, just don’t expect handwritten declarations of love from the big guy.

• He’ll demand cuddles and follow you around like a lost puppy even when he's not streaming. he can’t be caught being a softie when people are watching, can he?

• He will always make sure you’re well taken care of and happy in the relationship, whether it be through his blunt kindness or little gestures. He’ll go out to buy your favorite candy or a treat in the middle of the night simply because you wanted it.

• more on nonverbal communication, he isnt good at apologizing either. if you get upset with him, he’ll go away for a few hours to let you cool off. he hopes everything will be blown over when he come back with your favorite things and a simple “im sorry”

• he struggles to sleep without you, you had to buy him a weighted blanket and body pillow for when he’s traveling because he can’t sleep without the feeling of someone sleeping on his chest/ something to squeeze.

• he loves making you food, it's one of the many ways he shows affection. He'll constantly ask if you're hungry or if you want a snack while he's in the kitchen, and when making meals for dinner. he always gives you the bigger portion no matter how much you protest.

• he definitely won’t mind you gaining weight, especially since it makes you extra squishy and cuddleable. he will always reassure you that you're beautiful to him regardless.

[slxtmeri]

hi love <3 thinking about being a good house wife for jschlatt <3333 all the feminism leaving my body rn

star ml you are so real for this... this is a good fic idea... SHOULD I WRITE A SMUTSHOT??

anyways maybe i will but for nows headcanons mwah

- cooking things for him while he is recording/streaming, bringing them in to surprise him

- he buys you cute aprons as gifts, sometimes they'll have cute engravings like "jay's wifey" or "jay's fucking property"

- if you take extra time to clean or organize a specific area, he DEFINITELY notices. his eyes will light up as he pulls you in for a kiss

"you did such a good job, baby!"

- takes you out for dinner after a long day of spring cleaning, or other housework

- in addition to you being a good housewife, he'll do his best to help out. sometimes you'll walk in to find him folding clothes you were in the middle of doing, or maybe he serves you breakfast in bed.

- had to do one horny one

- bends you over the counter while you're in the middle of cooking/cleaning

"jay... the food..."

"shh, sweetheart. be a good girl and let me fuck you, hmm?"

[blushk1tten]

Ok, imagine you're a guest on Chuckle Sandwich, and the topic of Ted going to every MargaritaVille and the Rainforest Cafe comes up. Then, it turns to how you and Schlatt should go to every (whatever restaurant) in the country as a challenge. At first it was a joke, but then it slowly became something you and Schlatt started planning on. And during the trip, you guys starting getting closer and closer, knowing each other more and more. Where at the point you guys are flirting, touching, kissing, and even to the point you guys have sex.

I can even imagine that during one of the hotel rooms you guys were staying at, you accidentally see Schlatt full body naked. And seeing Schlatt absolutely embarrassed about it, you show Schlatt your naked body to make things even between you two.

i’m sorry this took so long but this prompt had me frothing at the mouth. i hope you enjoy <3

"no, because i loved when you went to every margaritaville and rainforest cafe," you explained to ted as you sat sandwiched between him and schlatt on their podcast. "i've had a similar idea for a while. i want to go to at least one cat cafe in every continental state, and along the way promote some shelters for people to adopt at."

ted raised his eyebrows curiously. "really? that sounds pretty cool. maybe you should take schlatt with you, since he's a lonely cat man and all."

"ignoring the fact that having two cats does not make me a lonely cat man," schlatt shot back at ted. "that sounds like a cool idea. i know there's plenty of cats like jambo and the other guy who need adopted."

you couldn't help but laugh a bit. "maybe ted's right. you sound pretty passionate about it for a totally not lonely cat man. you could come with me, and not be so lonely."

"fine!"

with that final word from schlatt, you had accidentally and officially locked yourself into the trip with him. he began to help you research cat cafes and shelters in every state, and helped you to plan the road trip map as well. that was only the start of the two of you getting closer. on the trip, it was a whole different thing.

"let's play twenty-one questions!" you suggested after leaving the cat cafe in austin, heading for your hotel and the next one in louisiana. after all, you had a roughly eight hour drive ahead of you.

schlatt scoffed, looking over at you. "isn't that a game for teenagers tryin' t' date someone?"

"no," you protested back. "it's for people to get to know each other better! i'll go first if you're going to be a dick. what's your favorite animal other than cats?"

he paused for a minute, then admitted his answer in a gruff voice. "bearded dragons. i used t’ have one when i was younger. he was a chill dude."

"see, that's nice, and i learned something new about you," you gave him a small smile. "now you ask me a question."

"are you a virgin?"

"schlatt! i'm not answering that."

the game continued to go similarly, with you asking genuine questions to get to know schlatt, while he asked raunchier questions to poke fun at you and get under your skin. about halfway through your journey though, you gave in, and began to answer him.

"what's your biggest turn on?"

"any kind of intimate touch."

he raised his eyebrows, surprised that he finally got an answer. "intimate touch? what does that mean?"

you could feel your face grow hot as you tried to explain. "any touch from a partner of mine, even if it's casual."

"even if they, like, shake your hand?"

that eased the tension, and you burst out into laughter as you shook your head. "okay, maybe not any touch."

with each leg of the trip, the two of you learned more about each other and grew closer. about halfway through the trip though, was when things began to heat up between the two of you. it wasn’t uncommon for the two of you to flirt or use pet names with the other.

“hey, toots,” he called to you, keeping his voice quiet so he didn’t startle the cats. “look at this one. i think it likes me.”

you couldn’t but giggle from your spot on the floor, where a gaggle of cats and kittens had been swarming you for affection. throughout your trip, you had come to find that most of the cats preferred you to schlatt. some found his large stature imposing, while others just didn’t like men, so it was a special moment whenever any cats would come up to him. this time, it was an old, graying tabby, purring loudly from its spot on schlatt’s lap.

“the first time you’ve ever gotten pussy in your life, big guy?” you teased, standing up and moving to sit beside him.

“oh, fuck you,” he scoffed softly, though he looked at you with a smile. “he just knows i’m the better person out of us. look, he’s not interested in you at all.”

it was true. the cat was completely content with schlatt and paying no attention to you. meanwhile, you couldn’t help but pay attention to schlatt. with a soft smile on his face as he scratched the cat’s chin and back, he looked endearing. dare you say it, he looked handsome. you couldn’t help it when you leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

schlatt stopped petting the cat instantly, looking at you with surprise in his brown eyes. then, after a moment, he spoke up. “you missed.”

this time, you could feel the surprise on your face as he leaned in again and kissed you on your lips, soft and tender. it wasn’t until the cat on schlatt’s lap meowed in displeasure at the lack of pets that you broke apart.

“i’ll— i’ll edit that out.” you stammered, glancing at the various cameras you had set up while schlatt resumed petting the cat.

“yeah,” he nodded, a light blush on his cheeks. “that sounds good.”

from that point on, flirting and pet names came with the addition of kisses. sometimes they happened on camera in the cat cafes, while other times one of you would invite the other over to their hotel room for a heated makeout session. soon enough though, the trip was coming to an end. you only had a few more cat cafes left before the road trip was over. that would mean an end to the flirting, the pet names, and the kisses that managed to steal your breath each time.

you were thinking about it forlornly as you headed to schlatt’s hotel room, hoping for a nice makeout session to cheer you up. he had actually given you the extra key, so you didn’t think twice as you swiped the card and opened his door. however, you didn’t even make it a step in before you noticed schlatt, completely nude with his bath towel in hand.

“oh my god!” you exclaimed, catching his attention as well.

the last thing you saw before turning on your heel and slamming the door was a glimpse of something massive between his thighs, heat filling your face as you ran back to your own room. you had no idea how you would address that incident, nor did you know if you wanted to. the flirting, pet names, and kissing was one thing, but seeing him naked and anything beyond that was something else.

eventually, you heard the buzz of a keycard opening up your room, though you kept your gaze firmly on the floor as you sat at the end of your bed.

“doll,” schlatt spoke up after a moment. “i’m not mad at you or anything. i gave you a keycard t’ my room so you could come whenever you wanted. i should’ve changed in the bathroom or said somethin’ when i heard the door.”

you shook your head, hoping that any embarrassment on your face was gone as you looked up. “no, jay, it’s my fault. i should’ve knocked before coming in.”

he sat down next to you on the bed. “we both could’ve done stuff differently, but hey, shit happens.”

you nodded, the wheels in your brain turning. you wanted to make it up to him somehow. then, it hit you. the best— or possibly the worst— idea that you had ever had. “i could get naked and let you see to make up for it.”

schlatt went silent for a moment, staring at you as if you had just spoken another language. “what?”

“i’m serious,” you told him. “i got to see you, so you should get to see me. then, we’ll be even.”

his throat bobbed as he swallowed. then, he nodded. “well, toots, better get to it.”

with that, you stood up and began to strip, first pulling off your top, then tugging your shorts down. the whole time, you could feel your heart pounding. you’d gotten naked in the past for others, but something about doing it for schlatt, the same schlatt you’d been growing feelings for, felt different. still, you continued, taking off your bra and underwear as well until you were finally naked in front of him. schlatt’s first words were the same as yours.

“oh my god, doll,” he took a sharp breath as he looked you over, his eyes beginning to smolder with lust. “you look perfect. like everything i’ve imagined and more.”

you couldn’t help but blush, though you were a bit surprised as well. “what do you mean everything you’ve imagined?”

schlatt blinked, his lust fading in confusion. “doll, you have t’ know how much i want ya by now, i just— i didn’t want t’ make you uncomfortable, so i took what i could get.”

“what do you mean when you say you want me?”

“platonically, sexually, romantically. whatever i can get.”

it felt like a weight came off your shoulders when schlatt said that, and you couldn’t help but smile as you walked forward to sit on his lap. “what about all of the above?”

he nodded, then like so many other times, he leaned in to kiss you. this time though, it was different, full of a special kind of passion that came with knowing your feelings were reciprocated. of course, there was also the fact that you were completely naked in schlatt’s lap, his hands running over every inch of skin he could reach.

“jay,” you whined between kisses. “wanna fuck you.”

“fuck, hold on, doll. lemme get my clothes off and get you prepped.”

he didn't take long in stripping, allowing you to finally get a good look at his body. that included his long, thick cock, hanging heavy between his thighs and curving slightly to the left.

"how is that supposed to fit?" you mumbled quietly to yourself, though schlatt chuckled as he heard.

"don't worry, doll," he promised, moving down and pressing a kiss to your clit. "i'll make sure you're nice and wet f' me."

you couldn't help but gasp as he dived in, your fingers tangling in his hair as he ate your pussy like it was his last meal. his own fingers were busy playing with your clit, as he drank up the slick coming from your cunt. "jay!"

schlatt moved and pressed a kiss to your clit before pulling back with a grin, switching to sliding two fingers in your pussy. "c'mon, doll. we're just getting started,"

a high-pitched whine left your mouth, and your back arched as he began to search for the spot that would make you fall apart. it didn't take long either, his grin growing as you called out for him again. "there it is. that's my pretty girl, soakin' my fuckin' fingers. are you gonna cum, baby?"

you nodded, crying out as he began to suck your clit as well. it was your undoing, and you quickly reached your orgasm as he continued to pump his fingers. "i'm cumming, jay! i'm cumming!"

he pulled off and gently pulled his fingers out, face shining slightly with your slick. "good girl. did that feel okay?"

once again, you nodded, panting for breath. "felt amazing."

schlatt leaned in to kiss you, a string of slick connecting your lips as he pulled back. you both laughed, and he pulled back further to break it. "so, are you ready for the rest?"

"yes please," you murmured, him carefully getting into position over you. "just be gentle."

"i promise." he replied, leaning in again to give you a quick kiss before he pushed in.

despite how wet and open you felt, schlatt was big enough that it was a stretch. your nails dug into his back, and you couldn't stop the whimper that escaped you. "oh my god, oh my god—"

he stopped for a minute, looking down at you in concern. still, you could see how hard he was working to keep still. "you okay, doll?"

"just give me a minute. your dick is fucking massive."

the two of you stayed in silence, each trying not to move until you finally gave the go ahead. this time, as schlatt finished pushing in and began to move, you could feel pleasure starting to run up your spine.

"feeling better?" he grinned, his smug attitude beginning to return as the pleasure was clear on your face.

"mhm," you agreed, beginning to roll your hips in time with his thrusts. "feeling a lot better— fuck!"

he adjusted your position into a mating press, making it so you could hear the wet sounds of your pussy as he thrust in, and let out a groan. "fuck, doll. your pussy's so wet f' me. gonna pump you full of cum, get ya even more slick,"

you couldn't help but whimper, clenching around his cock at that statement and making him chuckle a bit. "you like that idea? me fillin' you up with all my cum, gettin' your tummy all round?"

"please," you begged with a sob, making him pick up his pace with another groan. "please breed me, jay!"

"shit, doll, is that it? you want me to make you a mama?"

you nodded, drunk with pleasure. "mhm, please, jay. need your cum so bad."

"you'll get it doll," he grunted, moving his hand down to your clit as well. "just give me a minute. want you to cum too."

sure enough, it didn't take much longer for schlatt's thrusts to grow sloppy and his breathing to grow ragged. "you ready, baby?"

"yes, jay," you moaned, back arching once again as you felt your orgasm building. "gonna cum!"

"then cum, doll. need you to cum so i can give you a baby." he grunted, fingers continuing to dexterously play with your clit.

that was all it took for you to peak, tumbling over the edge with a cry. you could feel yourself milking schlatt as you came, causing him to cum shortly after. you couldn't help but feel tears prick at your eyes from the full feeling. it was everything you could have dreamt of with schlatt and more.

he helped you clean up afterwards, gentle and caring, before snuggling with you in bed.

"so," he eventually murmured, playing with your hair. "we're going to keep this up for the rest of the trip, and even after, right?"

you smiled softly, cuddling closer to him and giving him a kiss. "i think we'll be doing this for a long time to come."

[darkniters]

jschlatt whos a bit too handsy

contrary to popular belief, im a believer in ‘i wanna always be touching you’ jschlatt, so i feel if youre in public, hes always got his hand on yours, his arm around your shoulder, snaking around your waist, etc.

hed go as far as to hold some of your bags just so you both have hands free so he can grip at yours.

if you’re insecure about sweaty hands? SO???? he does not care. thats our sweat now.

when at home, he still has that mindset.

if you’re both in the living room, and you came in after and sat away from him, he’ll (in a very short time) make his way over to you, head in your lap and staring up at you like you’re the moon and the stars.

he loves to grab at your face, your shoulders; which then changes to him dragging his hands across your body.

he loves your waist, he often finds himself simply perching his hands there, and resting his head in the crook of your neck.

he loves when you sit yourself on his lap, facing him, he can look at you completely. hes completely starstruck.

he loves your thighs, he likes to grab and knead them in his hands, as well as that he loves to drag his lips over them, when he finds himself down there (its more often than you think)

he cant get over your back, hes just hypnotized the way its so clean, not a single flaw, but ready to be messed up by him soon. he loves how it arches, the bend in your back almost setting him off alone.

he puts his hand between your shoulder blades often, the gap being perfect to accommodate his hand between them.

he loves to hold you, he loves when you curl into him and when your breath is tickling his neck, whether it’s uneven or perfectly rhythmical, hes just happy his arms can engulf you and keep you near him

[ihavenothingtodowith1999iswear]

Y'all I have milked every Jschlatt headcannons post dry on this app and I'm hungry for more so I'm gonna put my writing skills to use and write my own. Also I might take requests in the future;)

Anyhoot!! Let's get on with some fluff!!

-This man will buy you everything you lay your eyes upon. You know that thing where you start to feel a clothing item in the store like you run your fingers along the sleeve of a sweater while you're checking something out. THIS MAN WILL BUY IT FOR YOU. "Oh this is cute!!" "Okay let's get it." Type shit. Even if you know you'll probably only wear it once.

-You will 100% be the passenger princess and you cannot convince me otherwise.

-Y'all this man YEARNS for cuddles. But he will never be caught admitting it. Like if y'all are just sitting on the couch watching a movie, he'll just put his arm around you and slowly move closer until y'all are cuddling. He will never admit he loves it though, but you know. You know damn well.

-When he blushes it's like OBVIOUS. Like his ears will go red and then it'll spread across his face and it's the cutest thing ever. And when he's extra flustered you can see him trying to hold back a smile, it's like an invisible string tugging at the corners of his mouth but he's trying so hard not to smile. So fucking cute.

-Just a little story idea thing I came up with while maladaptive daydreaming: he's doing a vlog with some friends while he's away from you on a trip where he's in a mall. He's in a perfume store where the group is just smelling around and he picks up a perfume that without realizing it is the exact perfume you wear. He smells it and is instantly reminded of you, the moments you'd share while snuggled up against one another, where life felt comfortably silent. A blush creeps on his face and his friends ask if he's okay, he brushes it off and tries to move on but he has something, or rather someone on his mind for the rest of the vlog. (Sorry if it sounds dumb or cringe lmao)

-He definitely keeps the relationship private from the internet but definitely brags about you to all his friends. (Ted almost asked about you on a chuckle sandwich episode to Schlatt. Needless to say Schlatt was pissed.)

-He will do anything to make you laugh, you're sad? He'll tell a joke. You're happy? He'll make the moment better with a joke. You're anxious? He'll try to cheer you up with a joke. Literally any opportunity he gets he'll try to make you laugh. He just finds your laugh adorable.

-He loves seeing you get along with his cats (especially Jambo) he loves seeing you petting or snuggling with his cats and will sometimes sneak pictures or videos of the moments. Over time, Jambo started to favor you over Schlatt. He hated it. (He secretly loved it)

I'm too lazy to think of any more so here ya go!! Eat up pookies!!