#STORY BC ITS GETS ME INTO THE BUTTFUCK NOWHERE MINDSET WHERE CARS DONT HIT PEOPLE THEY ONLY HIT DEER
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MADE FUN OF MY SIBLING AND THEY MADE A FACE AND I COULD TELL FROM THEIR FACE THAT THEY WANTED TO PUSH ME DOWN THE STAIRS AND AS I WAS OPENING MOUTH TO TELL THEM I LIKED THEIR IM GONNA PUSH YOU THE STAIRS FACE THEY SAID SHUT UP ILL PUSH THE STAIRS
#this was near the stairs but not so near that they couldve just done it. like they could see the stairs but i was not quite ripe for the#pushing so it was extra funny that i could divine their intentions from just their face#im good at that though. i have an intuition for what sorts of silly violence people are planning to enact unto me#once my friend offered me a warhead. like the candy. and i was like oh no thanks :) and he was like are you sure? and i looked at him and#immediately covered my water cup. he was like HOW THE HELL DID YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS GONNA DO WHAT THE FUCK#and i was like HOLY SHIT YOU WERE ACTUALLY GONNA DO IT I THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY#and that started a longstanding tradition of putting shit in each others waters. he liked to sneak up on me and get me with a nerf dart bc#he knew hed never manage it if i could see his face. asshole got a napkin in my milkshake in low lighting once though. i could always read#him really well with that kinda thing though like he wasnt that surprised when i stopped on the sidewalk and walked to his other side so he#couldnt shove me into the street bc wed known each other for ages at that point but they warhead thing was like. a couple weeks after we met#ALSO SHOVING ME INTO THE STREET WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN DANGEROUS WE WERE IN BUTTFUCK NOWHERE THERE WERE NOT CARS. HE WOULD NOT SHOVE ME INTO#THE STREET TO GET HIT BY CARS. WORST INJURIES I WOULDVE GOTTEN WERE SKINNED KNEES AND THAT WOULDVE BEEN HILARIOUS AND HED NEVER HAVE LIVED#IT DOWN. BUT NO CARS. NO GETTING HIT BY CARS. ALWAYS HAVE TO REMEMBER SHOVING PEOPLE INTO THE STREET GETS THEM HIT BY CARS WHEN I TELL THAT#STORY BC ITS GETS ME INTO THE BUTTFUCK NOWHERE MINDSET WHERE CARS DONT HIT PEOPLE THEY ONLY HIT DEER#what was my point. dont remember. oh well send tweet or whatever#mine
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