#STEERIKE ONE!
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ok im just putting this here cuz its Technically lore for my self.ship au but it doesnt. revolve around my si. i just had a Very vivid image while high the other day and i need to get the lore Out of my head lest i explode and die
ok so listen to me listen hear me out cmere listennnn: sha.wn spe.ncer dysphoria.
ive Mentioned that i hc him as nb but i think he only realizes in canon like,, after the show maybe . HOWEVER videos prescence definitely changes a Lot including shawns gender >:]c
so in my au shawn tells jules he isnt psychic a Lot sooner so what happens in deez nups (thanks episode titles) goes Very differently ! mainly in that there isnt rlly,, a fight ?
like ok. the entire time shawn is a Bachelor hes at a Bachelors Party and hes a Guy and hes wearing a suit that feels like its choking him and his dad is having a talk with him about being a Spencer Man and not continuing the cycle. the entire day shawns been having this,,, feeling that Wont go away and all of this only serves to make him feel worse.
so he chugs the prosecco and comes back to jules, and just sits there kinda miserable while she talks. she notices theres smth not right w him and tries her best to pry it out of him, but he just. cant. she goes on abt how if he rlly doesnt wanna tell her he doesnt have to, but that she Does love him and he can always come to her for anything. things have been changing a lot recently, what with marlowe and lassie and rachael and gus, but she assures him that they all still love him, and that hell always be their boyfriend-
shawn breaks at that and as jules tries to figure out what she said that went wrong, shawn tells her that gus will want to dance w her, and he leaves the party early.
then in right turn or left for dead shawn kinda,, avoids jules.
(shawn knows by this point that shes trans. theyve known video for years and while vids made a couple jokes abt shawn being nonbinary (mostly spurred on by shawn saying out of pocket things abt gender) they never like,, made her feel like she had to be anything. shawn appreciates it but now she wishes shed asked for help because oh god,,, she wants to get to know herself better and actually feel comfortable in her own skin but she is Terrified that jules and lassie and gus are going to leave her. shes known gus her whole life and the change might be the straw that broke the camels back, lassie is. well. lassie, and jules... shawn wants to Marry jules, as much as That thought scares her. shes sure shes the one and the idea of her leaving Hurts.)
so shawns out here concussed, dysphoric as all hell, covered in blood, and preemptively heartbroken. havin a time!
they dream of a scenario where the night had gone differently, where theyd told jules and shed been incredibly supportive. the girl is dead, sure, but hey, shawn can be nonbinary!
jules, on the other hand, is trying to talk to shawn but they keep avoiding her and she doesnt know why. she thinks they might want to break up with her, which hurts like hell, but if thats what they want, who is she to stop them? if only theyd Tell her.
so after the case is solved and jules saves shawn, she all but Drags them home to actually talk.
jules just straight up tells them: shawn, if you want to break up with me, do it. its okay.
and shawn just,,, breaks down Sobbing. they tell her Everything, how scared they are of losing her and how Awful theyve been feeling and aaagh. they say that they go aaagh
but jules scoops them up in her arms and assures them she wont leave them,, she loves them sososo much gender and all :'] <3
aaaurgh they make me happy. i hate how seasons 7 did them (NOT THAT I HATED THE BREAKUP IT WAS SOOOO GOOD BUT LIKE. i hated how shawn acted afterward,, season 6 and onward has Not been it for characterizations at all i fucking hate it)
ok gush sesh over more lore: idk how the rest of the episodes breakup era would go considering theyre together in my au but erm,, w jules and videos help (she comes out to vid next whos like "i knew,, but im proud of you ily") shawn comes out to everyone else and tries out new pronouns and expressions and a teehee :]] theyre all so happy and trans and gay and its great
#styx says#💛heard it both ways🍍#polycluedo📺🍍💊🔫💎#this is never seeing the light of day. shawn gender meta STAYS IN THE DRAFTS#this isnt meta this is just headcanon dghjdkfg#STEERIKE ONE!#ok well . this is getting posted cuz i got PEER PRESSURED /j i want to uim just embarrassed. sorry#dont look at me !!!!!!!!#(but also erm. i dont give context for any of the episodes i mention in this so feel free to ask what the hell canonically happens lol)
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STEERIKE 6
Six!!!
>:3
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