#SOOOOOO BAD..... WHY? WHY YOU GOTTA TRY AND BOX US IN? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE I'LL WAIT

[bylertruther]

sorry sorry sorry his tiktok makes me feel like maybe it's okay to say this but. some of you looked mad dumb calling him the straightest guy ever when he literally wore a rainbow suit to the s3 release, wears pastels, wore a turtleneck with a titty window for gods fucking sake, and wears purses all the time. like what the fuck is your issue sorry but literally HUHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHERE DID Y'ALL GET STRAIGHTEST MAN ALIVE ENERGY BC I KNOW IT AIN'T FROM MY BOY........

[missguomeiyun]

dinner @ H-Mart

DID YOU KNOW...

Orion Chocopie (the original flavour) now has a 30-pack box?! Whattt?! Well, maybe it existed a while ago (ie: in Korea) but it was my 1st time seeing this in Edmonton. Omg...

I was looking around this aisle to see if they have the banana-flavoured Chocopie still, & it’s all gone. The tag & everything =( good thing I snatched a box the 1st time I came :P

Alrighty, let’s move on to the food I had for dinner last night! PS: I gotta stop hanging out with badminton best friend & his wife.. . I am so bad at being Asian in the sense that I am so bad at (sneakily &/or aggressively) getting the bill, darn it! It’s stressing me out >.< but I’ve learnt. In a food court setting, you need to get the spot that’s like right next to the card reader (so close that you’re literally blocking the other person bcos the person is likely doing the ordering), & then you tap. But if they also have their card out, you push their hand away (which may cause minor injuries) & then while you’re at it, STEAL their card! *gasp* it was bad. I was a failure :’(

In any case, the food was great~

Ox bone soup. My coworker said it was bland & doesn’t have much in it... but it’s one of my fav soups so I had to try it. I like soups in general, but this is higher on my list than kimchi jjigae or deonjang jjigae; it’s almost shares #1/#2 spot with budae jjugae, which is kinda weird bcos they’re soooooo different! But I think that’s also the reason why; compared to budae jjigae, which has a lot of sausage/ham/bacon/instant noodles in a spicy broth, ox bone soup is very clean. It has a slightly milky appearance, & contains noodles & some beef slices (99% of the time topped with green onions). This H-Mart one had potato starch noodles, the one you have with japchae, which is a new experience for me bcos I’ve only had ox bone soup with regular white noodles. I prefer the white noodles, but potato starch noodles was alright too. Super home-ly dish, served with some banchan (kimchi & radish), a bowl of rice, & salt/pepper for seasoning.

KFC: this was the secret sauce chicken, in cup portion. Cup portion turned out to be more like a bowl... haha chicken was juicy & batter wasn’t too thick. The sauce was spicy, but also had a strong tanginess to it. Almost like a 1:1 of the standard spicy KFC sauce & Chinese sweet & sour pork sauce. It was good!

Best friend doesn’t eat chicken so we also got a tangsuyuk, which is the Korean-ified version of sweet & sour pork. Suuuuper zestayyyy haha the veggies that come with it (cucumber, that 1 piece of carrot, some onions) was pickled; not sure about the black fungus bcos I choose not to eat if I don’t have to. The pork pieces were of good size, meat was well-fried & nice amount of sauce as well. It wasn’t too much that the meat was swimming in the sauce; each piece had some contact with the sauce. Obviously when you get to the bottom, the remaining few pieces will be completely drenched.

You can’t order tangsuyuk without its main... jjajangmyeon, aka black bean noodles! It’s so hard to see what’s in the sauce; however, I can tell you that there’s onion, small pork cubes, a minute amount of green onion & zucchini, & there’s 4 peas sitting on top. I’m not a fan of semi-cooked or raw onions, but the onion here was all cooked fully & was soft so I loved it. Flavour was good, not too salty & noodles were on the al dente side, which I also liked. So satisfying!

We also got a udon soup & a large ddeokbokki; both not photographed -.-” the udon soup was alright; I feel indifferent about it but liked the broth, bcos they use the same broth as the o-deng one. The udon comes in a bowl, with udon noodles, enoki mushrooms, & several pieces of fish cake. It’s all pre-portioned & then when you order it, they scoop soup in. The ddeokbokki was yummy! It was surprisingly mild spicy, bcos I thought they would make it like the ones in Korea, but I guess they need to mild it down for the non-Korean population here in Edmonton.

Overall, excellent meal~

[deeeepsteep]

Alright now that I had like an hour or two to process what actually happened I think I can summarize my thoughts and feelings on Kingdom Hearts III...though it may be all over the place lmao

This is full of spoilers and it’s also very long so take that as a warning

This isn’t new and people have been complaining about it all over the internet but LMAO THEY REALLY DID KAIRI DIRTY DIDN’T THEY?????? She and Lea get this ENTIRE FUCKING UNIVERSE THAT’S ALSO SUSPENDED IN TIME so they can train and meet Riku and Sora’s skill levels but we hardly get to see them do anything lmao plus we don’t even get to play as her even though we briefly got to play as Riku a couple times. Also Nomura really pulled a Luna on Kairi and fucking killed her off for the sake of plot development - which shouldn’t be surprising at all because it’s Nomura we’re talking about and this isn’t the first time he’s given a female character the short end of the stuck but whatever, I guess that means he lied to us after all and KH3 won’t be Sora’s final journey...but maybe this also means that this is the beginning of Kairi’s, and the next game will be about her saving him for once???????? I’d like to think that’s what he’s planning but I can’t keep my hopes up because lol it’s Nomura

Now that I think about it, Namine and Xion were kinda useless too. Aqua’s the only female character out of the main roster who really had an impact on the story and actually did shit in KH3 - and even then, she was kind of in a “damsel in distress” kind of deal where Riku and Sora had to save her. I mean, there’s a good reason why they had to save her, but still. Again, I think Nomura just doesn’t have a fucking clue what he’s doing when it comes to writing for female characters lmao

I don’t necessarily think the Sora/Kairi stuff was forced, but I do feel like it was unconvincing seeing as they barely got any screen time together. It was established from the very first game that the both of them have a special bond - whether it’s romantic or platonic I don’t really care lmao, but I can’t deny there’s a unique closeness between them - and it’s reinforced up until KH3 for some reason. Like...suddenly Sora and Riku kinda just forget they’re best friends with her???? And Riku and Kairi didn’t even talk to each other the entire fucking game!!!! Sure, Kairi pretty much saves Sora from death and it’s obvious she’s the “guiding light” in his life but like...........there’s no substance to that at all. At least not in KH3. I dunno. It just felt very hollow to me. There wasn’t any buildup that made their last scenes together look or feel significant. 

Also, I know Roxas and Namine only briefly interact with each other in KH2 but it’s obvious that they still share a strong bond since they’re reflections of Sora and Kairi - so it was weird not seeing them interact in KH3. They promised they’d meet each other again and that they’re looking forward to seeing each other again, but that never fucking happens. It’s almost like at the end, Nomura suddenly realizes he created way too many fucking characters and he’s overwhelmed with trying to find conclusive, happy endings for all of them so a lot of shit just slipped through the cracks during the writing process.

So in the ending, Kairi’s the one that stays and Sora’s the one who disappears. Does that mean the beach scene is set after Sora goes and rescues her????? Nomura decided to fuck things up further in KH3 when he introduced time and space manipulation so literally anything is fair game at this point. I swear to God though if this is a “there’s multiple dimensions” sort of thing I’m going to fly over to Japan and hunt Nomura down myself

Aside from all of that bullshit, the ending was wholesome. Everyone partying on the beach???? Xion and Namine looking for seashells together????? A frisbee game??????? Ven accidentally breaking Donald’s sand sculpture of himself???? So wholesome!!!

Isa coming back to the light and returning to Lea!!!!!! They can finally be the gays we all knew they were meant to be!!!!!!! And they can raise their children Xion and Roxas in peace!!!!

I hope Aqua keeps Terra chained to a basement or something so he doesn’t run out and do dumb shit ever again - other than that I’m so glad the Wayfinder Trio are finally reunited

Soooooo the secret ending shows Sora and Riku in Shibuya????? At first I thought that they were going back to TWEWY but then I saw that Verum Rex dude so idk...but if that’s the case idk how I feel about it lmao, it’s kinda corny. I’d rather we just see them reunite with Neku and the gang - which reminds me, I should really replay TWEWY lmao

I stopped playing KHX a long time ago because the game got boring really quick, but I quickly read up on it so a few things make a little more sense re: The Dandelions, Ava, the Unions, why Ven hugged Chirithy etc. So is Xigbar gonna be the new bad guy now??? ALSO WE NEVER FUCKING FOUND OUT WHAT WAS IN THAT GODDAMN BOX....guess we gotta wait another 17 years for the next game!!!!!!

I find it weird that Corona and Arendelle were basically just re-hashes of the movies, but all the other worlds had their own original storyline that feels more like an add-on to their original sources. I’m assuming there’s a licensing/legal thing with Disney, but it really doesn’t explain much. I thought Elsa would’ve been a fun ally to have; it would’e been neat to see her ice powers in combat alongside Sora. And it’s lame that you lose Rapunzel as an ally after her hair is cut; that would’ve been avoided if Corona got another storyline so that she could develop abilities outside of her magic hair. Meh. 

Toy Story actually was the worst world for me??? The story dragged on a lot longer than it needed to and I got SO bored with the gigas shit. San Fransokyo was my favourite, not just because BH6 is one of my favourite Disney movies but also because the world was JUST SO BIG and I felt like I could spend forever just roaming around the place. It had an open-world feel to it. 

I actually didn’t mind Arendelle so much lmao, the mountain climbing was kinda fun - but I have bad memories tied to Frozen (I worked at the Disney Store when the movie came out so I was forced to put up with the hype, the annoying children, and their unbearably demanding parents...not to mention I had to listen to Let It Go a billion times a day) so that dampened my experience a bit.

Ok all in all the game was enjoyable for the most part. I loved the actual gameplay; the battle system was great and so delightfully chaotic!!! There were like 3249872 things happening all at once and it was so fun. The attractions were annoying sometimes but they’re a quick fix if you’re in a bind so I quickly got desensitized to them, and they finally (sort of) fixed the camera issue by giving you the option to re-centre the camera on Sora when it moves away which I was eternally grateful for.

This is just a jumbled mess and I know I’m leaving stuff out but I’m sure I’ll complain about them later when I remember lmao

KH3....maybe a 7/10??? Idk that feels a little generous. 6.5???

[lightningflash55]

Thoughts Dump on Season 7 Episodes 10-13

Shall we do this little read more thing here cause this is going to get long? Probably. Def open for talking about them if you decide to read all the way through! I’m up for some good MLP discussion.

A Royal Problem

Can I just start by saying how much I LOVE that we got an episode that actually has more in depth on the Princesses? I’ve been aching for one for forever, and honestly it feels like we’ve gotten more Luna over time cause she’s the one who’s had bigger problems that she’s needed to sort out. 

CELESTIA THOUGH, you cannot tell me she’s the boring blob that being the princess she is demands her to be all the time. This is why I need moreeeee. Give me Celestia’s wild side PLEASE.

On that note, I love how good she is at covering it up compared to Luna. Issues? Don’t fret my little ponies, they are being solved and I assure you, everything is alright. She’s just so GOOD at her role in being the one that takes everything just to make everyone else’s lives easier and brighter. Dang Celestia, how do you do it. Also the personality contrast between she and Luna is still great and it also shows their age/experience difference. 

The Twilight music box was a good example of how wonderfully odd this show can be and how, after 7 seasons, it continues to catch me off guard. I LOVE IT.

CELESTIA MAKES PANCAKES FOR EVERYPONY IN THE MORNING. I DIED. She is far too good and I highly appreciate the fact that she enjoys cooking, especially such silly yet comforting things?? Lmao

Not that I didn’t see it coming (I mean duh, but it’s just been awhile), but also holy heck is she a morning person. This is definitely where I connect to Luna more, and I love her snark.

Both the Princesses are just too good tbh, they both try so hard and do so much good in their own ways. LIKE HOW CONCERNED LUNA WAS ABOUT THE FUNDRAISER EVEN THOUGH IT WASN’T HER USUAL DUTY. She tried and immediately failed and felt super bad about it. All because she can’t hold a smile sjflksdjfjhdfj

Was telling my sister the whole time that nobody would ever, ever be as bold as Starlight Glimmer and that’s why this episode worked, and so I was glad Luna said nearly the exact same thing at the end. Applause for Starlight tbh.

Daybreaker’s design tho. On a more personal note, I was admiring her snarly face the whole time cause it’s definitely the closest design i’ve seen in the show so far that would work for Kelpie shape-wise. Putting that note aside if I ever try to do canon style stuff with my OC’s!

Luna’s dream was legitimately creepy for a show that seems to tone stuff down so much. There are like, magic battles and villains and stuff, but rarely does something strike me as dark? Maybe it’s just me. 

THAT’S IT FOR THIS ONE, I probs give it a 9/10

Not Asking For Trouble 

I don’t want to get too into this one, but for quite awhile Pinkie’s characterization has bothered me. Compared to the first few seasons, it seems recently she’s been over the top to the point of making others upset, but not even in a silly Pinkie way. It almost came across as less annoying others, but using her silly personality as a cover to let her freely say mean things? I’m not sure what happened there, but it sorta rubbed me the wrong way and this was just a good example of Pinkie being Pinkie. 

She went with everything the Yaks said and tried to understand them and fix the issue without being too much of a bother to them! That’s the Pinkie I know! I was honestly waiting for disppointment and was relieved when it didn’t happen. 

Not sure if this is an unpopular opinion or a lot of people thought this too, but what can I say, some episodes just seem more consistent than others

7/10?

Discordant Harmony

I FLIPPIN LOVE DISCORD

HE’S SUCH A BABY AND A PROTECTIVE GRUMP, DEFINITELY THE UNCARING OUTSIDE MUSHY INSIDE CHARACTER THAT I LOVE 

HE’S SOOOOOO ODD IN THE BEST WAY 

I reminded my little sister of this 50 times during the episode. I just feel the need to emphasize how much I love my dumb noodle horse dragon at all times. 

I don’t specifically like or dislike Fluttercord but you gotta admit there’s some good cheesy content here. THEY’RE CUTE FRIENDS AAAAA

Sometimes I wonder what the inside of Discord’s head looks like if he appears that crazy on the outside. Just, his mind must work in a very different way lol

THE SINGING GINSENG IS CUTE I WANT 100

I still marvel that the Discord we first saw is so taken by Fluttershy in such a legitimate way, but I am starting to get it. I suppose that his thing was always just chaos and messing with others and not necessarily being evil, and that’s probably what got me. He iiiiis kind of an attention hog so honestly, making friends that allow him to be his chaotic self around them is probably a fair compromise. Still, sometimes.

Explain to me though why he needed to go to 5 different stores to get things he could’ve just conjured up himself. Smh he likes to make things difficult and it pains me!! Stop being such a drama queen, but also don’t xD

Did u see the part where he hyperventilated into the bag but his neck expanded instead. Okay top wacky cartoon humor LOL

“Do something chaotic Fluttershy” “Oh no, I tipped over that cup!” MY SISTER AND I HAD A GOOD LAUGH AT THAT FLUTTERS PLS

There was probably an even mix of me expressing my love for discord and shaking my head actually. They go together hand in hadn though, no?

Hmm this one was also probably 9/10

The Perfect Pear

WHAT CAN I EVEN SAY ABOUT THIS EPISODE 

IT JUST GOT ME GOOD

IT WAS NICE TO GET BACKSTORY ON APPLEJACK’S PARENTS AND EQUAL PARTS HAPPY AND SAD

I MEAN THEY DEF AREN’T AROUND ANYMORE, DON’T THINK THERE WS ANY OTHER WAY TO READ THE IMPLICATIONS 

SO MANY GOOD FEELS

Just story and writing wise though this episode was so well done. There are always the funny episodes and everyone has their own favorite for reasons or because of their favorite characters, but sometimes some are just GOOD. Like classics, or everybody’s favorite, the ones that continue to stick out from the 100+ episodes the show has.

I’m rewatching these as I type this out and you know an episode’s good when you finish it and rewatch and things make more sense the second time around. Like how Grand Pear comes across as just a nice old pony the first time you watch it and if you rewatch it you’re like “Ohhh that look and being nice specifically towards Apple Bloom wasn’t just a random kind gesture”

Applejack’s over-reacting to everything: “PEAR JAM??? IN MY KITCHEN??” *DRAMATIC GASP*

“The food smells great Applejack i’ll brb for dinner” You mean the pancakes that are scattered all over the floor???

“And her cutie mark was a preserved jar, but pear butter don’t look too different from apple butter, so you know...” LMAO (true??)

The “the apple didn’t fall too far from the tree” moments got me, THESE KIDS TAKE AFTER THEIR PARENTS IN THE BEST WAYS. The sibling bonding was adorable in this ep.

Also I have to note, Pear Butter with her little bit of sassiness and curly ginger hair gave me Puck Connolly vibes the whole episode, which is always a good thing

DAMN THESE APPLES THAT STRIKE ME RIGHT IN THE FEELS EVERY TIME ONE OF THEM GOES INTO SONG

Def the part that got me the hardest right there. Like trying not to tear up, even

Ship goals tbh

What happened to them though honestly

GAH THE ENDING’S GIVING ME FEELS AGAIN I’LL END HERE 

10/10 EASILY

[beldin327]

Touching the Void by Padraic Harrison Act I Scene I

ACT I SCENE I

(The stage is dark.  Suddenly from the dark we hear a scream.  Red lights illuminate the stage.  Center stage is the source of the scream, a male in his late teens named Ziggy.  Three figures, two male and one female, all in black surround him.  The two men are Malcolm and Albert and the woman is Roberta.  Rebecca is next to Ziggy.)

Mal: It so easy to upset these creatures.

Al: You say that as if it were a bad thing.

R: Why does it make a sound when it feels pain?  What is the purpose?

Al: I don’t know but I like it.  It’s like music.

Reb: Zig, it’s Zag.  Stay with me, Zig.  Fight it, Zig, fight it

Ziggy: I can’t.

Reb: Yes, you can.  Don’t let them win.

Mal: The other one is here again.

Al: Strange.  It doesn’t derive pleasure from watching the subject suffer.

R: It feels sorry for the subject.

Ziggy: Please, just go away.

Reb: That’s it, Zig.

R: It thinks we can be beaten.  Silence, subject Z.  (Ziggy opens his mouth but can’t make any sound the Voices laugh.)

Reb: Talk to me, Zig.  What’s going on?  (Malcolm whispers in Ziggy’s ear.)

Ziggy: The hands of the clock are wrong.

Reb: Zig!  It’s Zag.  Zig, do you know where you are?

R: My turn.  (She whispers in his ear.)

Ziggy: Turn the key.  Turn the key to open the door.

Al: It’s almost too easy.  Let’s give it time to recover.  We wouldn’t want it dead, now would we?

Mal: Not yet.  (They exit.)

Ziggy: It’s over, they left.

Reb: Come here.  (She holds him as he shakes from exhaustion.) It’s okay, Zig.  It’s okay.  (The lights change to illuminate a dorm room. Ziggy walks into the scene and sits next to Bill, a male his age.  Bill wears jeans, a white t-shirt, and combat boots.  His hair is dyed blond.)

Bill: What’s it like?

Ziggy: Having a pseudo-seizure?

Bill: Yeah.

Ziggy: It’s like being in a cage.  You can see and hear everything going around you but you’re powerless to stop it

Bill: Weird.  What do the voices say?

Ziggy: They command me to do things.  And I can’t resist.

Bill: Sounds scary.

Ziggy: You have no idea.

Bill: Do they know what causes it?

Ziggy: Fuckin’ doctors.  They don’t know shit.  Oh sure, they have theories but they don’t actually know.

Bill: What’s the theory?

Ziggy: Stress.

Bill: Do they ever hurt?

Ziggy: No, but sometimes…

Bill: Sometimes what?

Ziggy: Sometimes, I feel like they should.  That probably doesn’t make any sense to you.

Bill: It makes perfect sense.  (Enter Jenny and Hiram.)

H: Hey, guys, what’s up?

Bill: Not much. What are you up to?

H: Nothing.  We were in Jenny’s room but Robin and Brian are “busy.”

Bill: Again?  Don’t they ever do anything else?  Like homework perhaps?

Jenny: Jealous?

Bill: I just don’t think sex is a good thing to build a relationship on.

Jenny: I never thought I’d hear those words come out of a straight man.

Bill: What can I say?  I’m just a hopeless romantic.

Jenny: Hey, Z.

Ziggy: Don’t call me that.

Jenny: I’m sorry.  I, I didn’t mean to—

Ziggy: (still angry) It’s fine.  Don’t worry about it.

H: (awkward silence) Soooooo, how ‘bout them Packers?

Bill: What?

H: Just something one of my friends at home says when ever there’s a lull in conversation.

Bill: Why?

H: He thinks it’s funny.

Jenny: Sounds like an interesting guy.

H: Ever see a six foot five Navy sailor in full dress uniform dancing to Mariah Carey?

Bill: Can’t say I have.

H: Then you’ve never truly lived.  Like you said, Jenny, he’s an interesting guy.

Jenny: But it’s ironic, right?  He doesn’t actually enjoy her music, does he?

H: Oh, he does.

Jenny: Is he straight?

H: Very.

Jenny: Where’d you meet him?

H: (as if obvious) Charleston.  I only live half an hour away.

Jenny: That means nothing to me.

Ziggy: Charleston, South Carolina is where Navy nuclear technicians go for training.

Jenny: I didn’t know that.

H: It’s okay.  I’m just used to everyone knowing.

Bill: My parents want me to join the armed services.

Jenny: Which branch?

Bill: Well, at first it was the Marines but now they’re saying it should be the Army.

H: No offense, Bill, but I don’t think you’d last very long in the military.

Bill: That’s what I said.  They think it’ll toughen me up or some bullshit.

Jenny: Don’t most people join up before they go to college?

Bill: I managed to convince them this way would be better.  See, if I got discharged I wouldn’t be able to pay for college.  But this way I’ll have something to do in the event I get discharged.  Of course, if my grades aren’t impressive they’ll pull me out and refuse to pay for college, which means I have to find the money on my own and the military would look pretty tempting.

Jenny: What’s your major?

Bill: (Smiling ironically) Theatre.

Ziggy: Maine won the Civil War.

H: Huh?

Bill: H, do you know what he’s talking about?

H: Not at all.

Jenny: Little Round Top.

Bill: What ever happened to sequiturs?

H: I think they went out with hammer pants.

Jenny: During the Battle of Gettysburg the Union soldiers retreated to a hill called Little Round Top where the 20th Maine was.  They were the North’s last line of defense against the South.  They couldn’t retreat.  They were ordered to die to the last man if necessary.  And not only did they hold the line, they won the battle.  And it turned the tide of the war in the Union’s favor.

H: Where did you learn this?

Jenny: I’m from Philly.  You know, Pennsylvania.

Bill: What does the Civil War have to do anything?

H: Good point.  Ziggy, why did you bring this up?  (Ziggy remains silent.)

Jenny: Things we expect everyone should know.

Bill: Well, we certainly proved the point.

H: Ziggy, are you okay?  (Ziggy nods.) You went quiet all of a sudden.  (Ziggy shrugs.)

Jenny: (She stands) I think they must be finished by now.  Bryan will be anyway. Goodnight, guys.  ‘Night, Ziggy.

Bill: Later.

H: Auf Wiedersehen.

Ziggy: Bye.  (Jenny exits.)

Bill: You wanna tell me what the hell that was about?

Ziggy: What?

Bill: Oh, so you can talk.

Ziggy: What’s your point?

H: You were channeling Marcelle Marceau.

Ziggy: I didn’t have anything to say.

H: (rushes over to feel his forehead) No sign of fever.  But it could be a tumor.

Ziggy: Get off me.  I feel fine.

Bill: You aren’t acting like it.  First you blow up because Jenny—ohhhhhhhh. (He laughs.)

Ziggy: I don’t have a crush on her.

H: (smirking) Nobody said you did, Ziggy.

Ziggy: Just don’t tell her, okay?

H: Of course not, but you’ll have to tell her eventually.

Ziggy: (sarcastically) Oh, that’ll be a wonderful conversation.  Excuse me, Jenny, how would you like to go out with a complete loser with self-esteem issues?  C’mon, guys, Jenny’s smart and gorgeous.  She’s out of my league.

H: Awwww.  He’s so cute when he’s oblivious.

Bill: You gotta wonder how someone so smart can be so dumb.

H: Well, he is from Maine.

Bill: They still have girls in Maine.

H: That’s true.

Ziggy: You do know I’m right here?

H: (Ignoring him) Do you think he’s figured it out?

Bill: I think we have to tell him.

H: He still won’t believe us.

Bill: But he has a right to know.

Ziggy: (exasperated) What the hell are you trying to say?

H: (to Bill) May I?

Bill: Please.

H: She digs you.

Ziggy: Next you’re going to tell me you’re straight.

Bill: Glass half empty much?

Ziggy: You guys really think she’s into me?

H: Have I ever lied to you?

Ziggy: We’ve only known each other a month.

H: But have I lied to you?

Ziggy: No.

H: So trust me.

Ziggy: (stands up) I’m going to the library to do some reading.  Later.

H: See ya.

Bill: Have fun.

Ziggy: Oh, I will.  (Exits.)

Bill: Why’s he study so much?

H: He’s applying for a scholarship. Without it he can’t come back next year.

Bill: That shouldn’t be a problem.

H: Well, he wasn’t exactly studious in high school.  He barely graduated.

Bill: The seizures?

H: That’s part of it.  He tell you about Rebecca?

Bill: Not the whole thing, just that she was pure evil.

H: He got so wrapped up in her that he stopped paying attention to his grades.

Bill: How’d he get in if he had such bad grades?

H: His essays were fucking brilliant.  Trust me, I read them.  (Looks at his watch) Shit, gotta go.

Bill: GSA?

H: Yeah.

Bill: Can I stay here?  The beast is in my room.

H: Still not getting along with your roomie?

Bill: Not even a little.

H: Don’t break my stuff.

Bill: I’ll try not to.  (H exits.  Bill walks over to a bookshelf and selects a graphic novel deliberately, after some thought from Ziggy’s collection.  He sits on the bed and begins to read.  There’s a knock.)

Bill: Enter.  (Robin, Jenny’s roommate enters.)

Robin: Is H here?

Bill: GSA meeting.

Robin: Oh.  (Pause) My name’s Robin, by the way

Bill: Jenny’s roommate?

Robin: Yeah.

Bill: (Pause) I’m Bill.

Robin: Oh.  (Pause) I’ll just leave then.

Bill: Nah, stay.  I mean, if you want to.

Robin: I don’t want to bother you.

Bill: It wouldn’t be a bother.  I’m only reading a comic.

Robin: (sits) Thanks.  (Pause) How do you know Jenny?

Bill: We had orientation together.  (Pause) How’d you meet H?

Robin: Through Jenny.  (Pause) Have you picked a major yet?

Bill: Acting.

Robin: Getting a degree in starving to death?

Bill: Yeah.  You?

Robin: Art or art history.  Can’t really decide.

Bill: Art history people are pretentious assholes.  I mean, the ones here. I mean—

Robin: It’s okay, I agree with you.  But if I major in that I can actually feed myself.

Bill: Food is overrated.  Dignity is more important.

Robin: Living in a cardboard box is dignified?

Bill: At least you can decorate the cardboard box.  (Pause) You okay?

Robin: Bryan dumped me.

Bill: Oh.  (Pause) And this is a bad thing?

Robin: What?

Bill: I’m just saying the guy’s a douche.  You do know he was cheating on you right?

Robin: I didn’t.

Bill: Oh.

Robin: How do you know this and I don’t?

Bill: Everybody knew.

Robin: This day just keeps getting better.

Bill: Sorry, I was actually trying to cheer you up.

Robin: So far you’re doing a wonderful job.

Bill: Sorry.  I just think you can do better.

Robin: What makes you think that?  We just met.  I could be an axe murderer for all you know.

Bill: I may not know you but I know Bryan.  He’s a prick.  A dumb prick.

Robin: (Abruptly) Bill, are you hitting on me?

Bill: (cockily) Maybe.

Robin: Is your normal strategy to bash the ex-boyfriend?

Bill: I’m trying something new.

Robin: How’s it working out so far?

Bill: You haven’t run away screaming so that’s a good sign.

Robin: Not very subtle.

Bill: But it works.

Robin: Oh, really?  Maybe I’m just being polite.

Bill: You’re not.

Robin: How can you be so sure?

Bill: No woman has the power to resist William T. Sanders.

Robin: I see.  Then I’m doomed.  What’s the T stand for?

Bill: Terrence, my mom-- (She leaves her chair and sits next to him.) Wh--

Robin: Shh.  Don’t speak.  (She leans on him and he strokes her hair.  The lights on the set dim as Bill walks into the foreground. The lights on the stage are red.  Drums play as the Gremlin enters.  The Gremlin wears a mask with an absurdly long nose and claws. He holds a knife.  Bill is sitting on the stage; the gremlin circles around him. Bill rocks back and forth.)

Bill: Will all great Neptune’s ocean wash this blood clean from my hand? O, o, o, for a muse of fire.  G-g-g-gallop apace you f-f-fiery footed steeds.  All, all, all is lost.  It is the-the-the cause.  I (as in if), If you prick us do we not bleed?  No, no, no, don’t think of blood. Blood is bad, very bad. Bad.  Bad Bill.  Must be punished.  No, focus, Bill.  You can get through this.  If it were done, if it were done, if it were done ‘twere well it were done quickly (the Gremlin and Bill stare at each other.) O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I. (Addressing the Gremlin) Help me!  (The Gremlin offers Bill the knife) Just a little cut (as he reaches out for it). A tiny one.  Just deep enough to know.  No!  I can, I can fight this.  No, no I can’t, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t.  (He takes the knife. The Gremlin cackles as the lights fade.)