#SMH & FML define her mood right now

[tumblingxelian]

What the Hell? A Collusion AU

Lila, bedecked in a cleaning lady disguise in her own apartment was caught somewhere between giddy satisfaction and paranoid dread as she skimmed the results of her latest play. 

Things had gone well, better than she thought possible really, when Ladybug & Chat Noir decided to help an Akuma toss the mayor out of office. Ordering Chloe to burst in with the press and make them look bad had been an inspired adaptation on her part. Really she'd never expected things to go that well. 

Then it went side-ways and Ladybug caved Chloe's head in with her yoyo, a simple "That's enough" and suddenly the blonde bimbos supposedly empty head was splattered across everyone's TV screen before those stupid Tsurugi robots could do anything. 

& yes, Tsurugi stocks were falling, but not as fast as Ladybug's reputation in the polls! 

Lila should be ecstatic, but the reality Ladybug might turn that same violence on her was now a real and genuine concern and for all that Chloe was an vacuous and obnoxious tool, Lila couldn't deny seeing her skull split open, her blood flow and her brain splatter across the floor hadn't horrified her. 

But Lila was a practical girl and once Chloe was revived she calmed right down and tried to regain control of the situation. Save that Chloe had evidently dropped the ear peace Lila provided her and instead did the following incomprehensible things. 

Said, "I just got my skull caved in by a super hero. How do you think I feel!?" 

Rattled off the passwords to her fathers computer. 

Then she ran away.

& evidently, for all Chloe lacked in swift mental faculties she evidently made up for it in running because the press lost her almost instantly. 

Still, Lila could work with this, she was adaptable after all and had decided to share that recording of Andre disowning Chloe for her half sister alongside a funding campaign.

Now if she could just find Chloe she'd have her little cash cow back in its barn and could move on to trying to figure out Gabriel and Ladybug's next move, if all went well she could swoop in and-

There was a thumping on her door, followed by a trill, "Let me in Lila, I have had a day." 

"Chloe!" Lila cheered, leaping from her seat and throwing open the door she began fussing, "Oh my dear, exceptional, wonderfully brave friend, I saw what that monster did to you! I've been trying to reach you and find you but I knew if you would go to anyone it would be your closest friend so I stayed here, waiting, hoping you'd come back!" 

She pulled Chloe into the apartment and her embrace which the blonde slowly returned without any of her usual energy or clumsy attempts at haughtiness. 

Burying her face into Lila's neck Chloe murmured, "It's nice that someone... Cares..."

"Of course I care, Chloe. Even if the world turns against you I'm here for you and I always will be." The fact Chloe's online following went from a respectable seventy two thousand to several million with donors to match certainly helped. 

"That campaign, that was you right? I don't recall us sharing bank details." 

Lila was used to having to swiftly reorient her deceptions but Chloe usually required so little effort to manage she took a moment and maybe said too much. 

"I did, after the horrible things your father said I thought you deserved some resources all your own. I know you have your mother-"

"No I don't, she won't remember my name by tomorrow," Chloe's hug grew firmer, tighter.

"I need that money Lila, transfer it to my account."

Squirming, she answered, "I thought I could manage it for you, it'd be so heavy for you- uh, Chloe, I know you had a hard- day, ah- tight!" 

Chloe's hug was like a viper constricting her upper arms to her chest and Lila could barely breath as the girl whispered.

"I need that money, you'll send it to my account. Won't you, friend?" 

Panicking and unable to get away Lila accented, "Of course, my dear friend!" A few haphazard presses on her Alliance ring and a projected image showing her changing the fundraiser details to Chloe's account filled the otherwise dark room. 

Chloe's hold slowly loosened and she pulled back enough to kiss Lila on the cheek, once, twice and then pulling away she looked her over with...

Lila couldn't quite describe it. She was used to Chloe having a sort of lazy, twitchiness about her, like one might expect of a drugged up horse.

But this new expression was somehow both strangely misty and yet all too focused for the Chloe she knew. 

Pulling away Chloe nodded to herself and said, "I need to make some calls and then I'm heading to bed, I will be staying here until I sort out a new living situation." With that declared like it was a fact and not utterly confusing the blonde made her way to Lila's bedroom. 

"I, of course you can stay over Chloe, but I only have one bed."

Chloe held the door and looked at her, "Haven't you ever read fanfiction?"

'Since when can you read?' A part of her wanted to ask, but out loud she answered honestly for once, "Not really?" 

The door slammed shut, Chloe's voice echoing, "That was the sound of you missing your shot!" 

Lila stood in dull confusion as she tried to parse what just happened and ultimately could say only one thing.

"What the hell?"