#SILLAY MODE ENGAGED
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nuzzles my face against my baby ryan 馃ズ馃挅
#f/o:锟斤拷锟絯hat a fool believes馃幐#tape entry circa 1980#SILLAY MODE ENGAGED#FACE OF A MAN WHO HAS JUST PISSED OFF MIN HFDJS#OOOO my baby ;w;#i miss him so so fucking much i like. literally had a breakdown abt how much i missed him a couple days ago ghdfjk#full on sobbing abt how much i love and miss him and need him here holding me#i really want to be vulnerable w him and wrap my arms around him as bury my face in the crook of his neck#oh god id do anything to hear him... i want to hear his beautiful wonderful angelic voice... IM TEARING UP AGAIN#everything about him... its so wonderful... him and my min-gi own my entire heart#id do anything for them... i love them...#thinking of ryans voice makes me tear up from how much i love and miss him...#i want to hear him tell me how talented i am and he knows ill be able to do all the things id like and be something great#that he knows im destined to be a rockstar and we all will get to be rockstars together :'-]#i want him to play w my hair while he talks to me and runs his other hand over my body caressing me#id like to hear him sing to meee#maybe we'll put on a record or just listen to a tape and sing the songs together#id also like for us to play some guitar together :-]#ive been making progressing again on this song last night that i had to put off w stuff + surgery#and i feel like ryan would be proud of me :'-]#but just auh my heart is so full i just love my baby more than there are stars in the sky type of thing#i want to take in his scent and be comforted by it and his presence and how im being held against him#holding his pretty face in my hands and looking into his beautiful dark brown eyes#smoothing out his hair and tucking any loose strands behind his ear#kiss his pretty hands... just all over just hold it to my face as i keep planting little kisses all over#on his finger tips where his callouses from playing guitar are eheh#anyways aouh ( blasts thunder road by bruce springsteen while thinking of ryan and me )
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the dogys get STANCED
when dogs want to play & do this, like if you agree
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Feel free to get sillay with it! I don't think anyone really minds.
SILLY MODE: Activated
ENGAGING SILLY PIC PROTOCOL.
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instead of surviving the actual mechanics from mr living liquid and his jiggly ass, i was fighting for my life in vc bc Sillay Mode was engaged from the get go and i couldnt FUCKING BREATHE
shi'n got called a husband (living liquid) stealing whore, and you know what, good for her
#ffxiv#nana plays ffxiv#TEA tank time#i got lightheaded twice!!!!!#in less than 2 hours!!!!!!#at least we saw 1'30m into the 17m fight....#PROG
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The kids love me for my neurodivergent swag
#monologuing#idk i feel like the reason i'm better with kids than people my age is bc i'm neurodivergent in some way#adults are so concerned with apparent normalcy so they have so much difficulty with children#idk if i'm autistic or not. the resources to find out just isnt there for me and i dont want to diagnose myself#but whenever i have to interact with young kids i just go autism mode and the kids love it#just go sillay! dont dismiss their interest! engage and actually talk with em!#also i'm really hesitant to categorize whats nd behavior and not bc the standards in this website are very. western#here it's more categorized as a learning disability. people are still very cruel to nd ppl here#but ppl accept eccentricities here! my hs friend gestures a lot and has a different way of speaking and shes pretty popular#a good amount of relatives in my family has vocal tics. mom and dad and my aunt and uncle makes weird noises at the regular#i'm confused over what this site labels as 'weied' because here theyre just. quirks people pay no mind to#anyway yeah be silly to young kids they love it#i turn into an entertainer in front of kids even though i worry about their opinions about me. which is dumb i know GDMGKGKZKGKDK
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ok listen i have a pathological obsession with alec and have spent an almost absurd amount of time studying him like im going to be paid for it. so i feel highly qualified to say that your cosplay mannerisms were awesome and fun and felt true to the character and even if there is room for improvement you should still give yourself a hand for how good it was !!
i will say re alec mannerisms. he by default comes off like you said, as a sloppy disaffected teenage boy. little overly lax, at times way more casual looking than many people would be when geared up for a fight in costume. but he also Is textually fairly feminine when he's being regent. he's fairly regularly described as feminine, and at one point during behemoth fight a ward decides he's feminine enough to make a homophobic insult at. and the main contributing factor to people in 2011 deciding that a certain teenage boy Seems Gay is, aside from his poofy shirt and tights, probably going to be his general mannerisms and the way he carries himself as regent. he can be theatric and silly, and he repeatedly demonstrates a complete lack of concern with achieving any masculinity whatsoever. so in interpreting him i Would actually suggest being fine with or incorporating femininity, and id also keep in mind that if he does grace it's often going to be as a gag or a role he's briefly playing up before going back to lazyboy mode. there's my 2 cents if you want them
i would also say that. not wanting to fall or step onto protruding nails is a pretty good excuse for being stiff. it's method acting in that alec would also not want to step or fall on protruding nails 馃憤
and re your hypothesis yes it's precisely that :) there's several angles for interpreting his power but the most like. Fundamental, core level of it. is that it's the power of a boy who grew up with a childhood so terrible his primary coping mechanism was to need to get the fuck out of his own body. he gets more present once aisha shows up and he's got a friend to engage with, but pretty much every time taylor narrates that alec seems weirdly disaffected, disinterested, or lazy, it's because he's depressed or dissociating. his default mode is disengaging from himself, especially for anything stressful, because doing it is how he survived his childhood. it's how he manages to Stay So Sillay in situations where everyone else is horrified
@lakesbian I wanted to convey the laxity, sloppy movements, and, at the same time, grace without going into femininity. But so far, I have not managed to do this mix as I intended. Some of the movements are too stiff. Part of the problem was the need to balance in a mask with limited visibility on a burnt fallen beam with protruding nails, with the possibility of falling on the same ones lying nearby. But is this an excuse? I need to practice more.
In my opinion, Alec and Taylor have the most difficult movement patterns to display of all the Undersiders. At the same time, their manner of movement is complex in different ways.
Taylor's movements are angular, strange, and look a little inhuman at certain moments (as the author describes it). At the same time, you have to very carefully balance on the edge and not slide into complete creepiness.
So it is difficult (difficult in different ways) to show the manner Regent and Skitter movement, but also very interesting.
P.S. About cigarettes
This is a direct illustration of a line from the song: "I like the look of a cigarette, but I hate the way it tastes." This is very much in Regent's spirit: a kind of posing, without real enjoyment of what you are doing.
I think there's a lot about this song ("Drama" by Spencer Sutherland) that suits Alec:
"I strike a pose, and when it glows, my cue to give it away.
Woke up with an attitude, paint a smile on my face
Win or lose, you get to choose, when all the world鈥檚 a stage"
"Fakin' my own funeral just to see who cries
Then I walk in like I鈥檓 born again, 鈥榗ause I love a good surpris械"
And of course, the chorus:
"Doin' it for the drama (Dra-ma-ma-ma-ma-ma)
Drama
Baby you know that you wanna
How it feels good in the middle
What鈥檚 life without a little drama?"
I see it as an attempt to feel something inside himself. I suspect that Alec may have dissociation (also possibly derealization/depersonalization) due to traumatic events since childhood, and the nature of his superpower further raises the possibility of this hypothesis.
#worm spoilers#and thus ends my twig-induced week or two entirely without alecposting....it's like returning home
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maybe I like tsomd so much bc every time I watch it there is a 100% guarantee that it will engage within me the mode of Sillay Time
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