#SEAN CAHILL DID NOT DESERVE THIS

[rvspecter]

[pyro-peony]

Thoughts on 9x08 of Suits

ALRIGHT KIDS LETS MOTHERFUCKING GOOOOOOOOO (this is a long one sorry y’all)

Harvey not wanting Donna to worry is cute and all but like....you’ve always looped her in dude and this has got to be no different.

Honestly Sean Cahill is one of my favorite hero-villains of Suits so I’m glad he’s back. And Donna better bitch slap Malik, at least with her words.

Jumping right into a court room scene feels rushed let’s see how this goes. Edit: it was fine. And fuck you Malik, Harvey totally cares!!!

Okay so I like that they are going to try and do something Me Too related with Esther and Louis, so I hope this lands right.

So like...Faye representing Cahill would be a choice and I’m not entirely sure why Harvey is saying no other than he hates Faye, which valid honestly. Ekkk idk y’all should she represent him??

This supplier situation is a metaphor and please Louis don’t fuck this up!!!!!!

Sean, Alex, and Harvey working together is fun and I want more of it.

Guys I’m LOVING this plot line so far!! So much intrigue!! All the super Darvey stans are mad but this is the fucking Suits I signed up for INJECT IT INTO MY VEINS!!!!!!

Lol pat me on the back later Harvey. They are SO CUTE AND MARRIED.

Esther and Louis both have points, but Esther is right. Amy Acker is a true gift. This fight was so good.

“The side that I’m on is always gonna be the side that’s against you.” Forstman is honestly so fucking scary and so good. Like Harvey knows Forstman could murder him. This is SO INTENSE.

Darvey stans are mad lol. But Harvey truly is too busy kicking Andrew Malik’s ass, and couples who don’t live together can’t spend every night together it’s just not realistic. Donna is letting him off the hook for neglect while he’s trying to work and that’s honestly couple goals

Getting Samantha to take Esther’s case is A+++++ and Katherine Heigl is so hottttt 😩😩😩

Can I just say I wanted Jealous Donna with Esther and I’m not gonna get it and I’m sad about it.

Good apology Louis.

THREE PIECE SUIT HARVEY LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOO

Wow. Malik is a fucking dick and Harvey’s gonna beat the shit out of him. But also Harvey leaves the firm at the end so like WHAT IS HAPPENING?? Is Faye gonna fire Harvey??

In this house we DO NOT QUESTION Donna’s instincts!!!!

Harvey’s shooketh face honestly????? I’m like scared, sad, and turned on all at the same time what is this wizardery Gabriel???

WOWOWOWOWOW Sean I kind of hate you? Everyone is being so mean to Harvey and it’s not fair he’s a good guy!!!!!!! “Rules aren’t right and wrong and every line I’ve ever crossed is so it again cause I’m fine with what’s in my soul” damn. I got chills y’all.

Ugh Faye just sucks. Love Denise Crosby though she’s a gem. But Faye needs to die. Also Malik recommending Faye is suspect imo.

I love my blonde suits women teaming up. This is gold. And Katrina convincing Esther to come forward is a lot but ultimately good. And Esther got to say fuck that was awesome.

They have a plan but I’ve got a bad feeling about this y’all. I don’t think Harvey survives the night. This is going to be devastating isn’t it?

Lol all three lawyers getting arrested during this case has got to be a record like this should be in the papers. but see this is why I love Sean and Harvey, it’s a good pairing. But yes y’all this was way to easy. I’m so fucking stressed.

Harvey sinking that pool ball in the corner was SUPER HOT.

Sheila and Louis are gonna get married before the series ends and it’s very sweet!!!!!!! I’m guessing the last episode. And Darvey stans are mad lololololol. Am I a Darvey stan? Yes but I’m a Suits stan first and Louis deserves this.

Damn. They really killed lily? They really did that. Wow. It’s. A choice. And not a bad one but it’s certainly putting this story in a certain path. I think they’re really making this about Harvey’s feelings and make it a personal decision to leave the firm and not because the law forced him out and honestly? I might be here for it? And Donna telling him both his parents have died is kinda poetic.

WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?????????

[statusquoergo]

Harvey gets arrested! And might lose his license! And Samantha is working on something special! And Katrina wants in! And everyone’s up against Andrew Malik! Boy, that’s a lot of stuff, this is going to be one jam-packed episode!

I mean, yeah, it is, but we’ll get to that later.

Continuing our merry cavalcade of returning guest stars, Harvey arrives at his condo, bottle of wine in hand, to find Sean Cahill loitering out front, having been arrested by Andrew Malik for “[conspiring with Harvey] to swap Mike Ross for William Sutter.” He’s shown up now to “get their stories straight.” Harvey responds by…demanding that he’s now Sean’s attorney of record so that they “can talk about anything and it’s not admissible,” and Sean agrees despite the fact that the optics will be downright awful. And very suspicious. These guys are idiots.

Looks like this week’s spin of the Wheel of Exploitable Social Justice Issues landed on the #MeToo movement; Esther Litt, appearing for the first time since Season 5 (“Hitting Home” [s05e07]), with zero lead-in, interrupts Louis’s dictaphone rant about his and Sheila’s attempts to choose a baby name to ask Louis to help her tank a merger which is apparently “solid as a rock,” on account of the fact that the company her company is planning to merge with employs her former mentor, Paul Richmond, who sexually assaulted her fifteen years ago. She doesn’t want to go public with the accusation because “women who come forward get put through a meat grinder,” but she does want Louis to “make this deal go away.” Anyone want to put a bet down on Louis being able to keep his head and not out his sister to this piece of shit? I believe the odds in Vegas are sixty-five to one against.

Based on the fact that Harvey “[doesn’t] give a shit about wine,” Donna quickly deduces that something serious must have happened to hold him up; Harvey confesses that Malik is after Cahill for conspiring with Harvey, which Donna and Harvey both know perfectly well is bullshit because Malik doesn’t care about Cahill (and how dare anyone other than Harvey be the target of some pointless personal vendetta). Long story short, they’re both worried, but they don’t have any other choice than to trust Cahill, so that’s what they’re gonna do.

I’m starting to think Suits is pulling out its courtroom set at every possible opportunity in an effort to maintain its credibility as a legal drama, since ninety percent of the buffoonery that goes on at the firm itself is just everybody’s torrid social affairs occasionally gilded with the odd misuse of legal terminology. So here we are again in court for some distinctly not-a-trial activity as Malik argues that Harvey should be removed as Cahill’s attorney based on the fact that he’s the one Cahill allegedly conspired with, and they’re trying to use attorney-client privilege to get away with the crime.

Couple things; Malik’s case might’ve been strengthened by bringing up Aranson v. Schroeder, 671 A.2d 1023 (N.H. 1995), wherein a “malicious defense” liability was created for “counsel who engages in the fostering of an unfounded defense or pursues a defense for an improper purpose”; also I hate to break it to…all of them, but Harvey’s only been Cahill’s attorney for about a day, and the subject of their alleged conspiracy wasn’t regarding legal advice or representation, so it’s not covered by privilege.

Harvey asks how this is any different from a joint defense agreement, the answer being that a JDA refers to communications between a client and attorney being conveyed to another of that attorney’s clients, not communication between an attorney and one of his clients (even if the attorney is also his own client), but Malik instead accuses Harvey of setting the case up for a mistrial (how) so Harvey offers to resign if Malik wants to hand it over to someone else. Malik refuses to “[walk] away from a case [he’s] been building for eight months,” Harvey claims that Malik isn’t charging Harvey directly because it’ll look like a vendetta, and the judge interrupts their little cat fight to decide that Cahill’s willingness to waive his right to a mistrial grants him the “right to his counsel of choice,” because those things are related, and “[he wants] discovery documents in [Harvey’s] office in an hour,” so I guess one hour of Suits time equals six months in the real world, if any mathematicians in the audience want to do the calculations.

Louis shows up in Katrina’s office to make a delightful hypocrite of himself in light of this episode’s “women’s rights of autonomy” theme to declare that whatever she’s doing isn’t as important as what he needs her to do, although I guess it’s fine since she caves immediately? Anyway he shows her the terms of the merger and she reasons that the thirty percent premium (the what now?) means that the company must be covering for something, so all Louis needs to do to tank the deal is figure out what that is.

Surprise! Malik called Faye to get Harvey kicked off Cahill’s case. Harvey continues Louis’s beautifully unaware misogyny theme by telling Faye that she’s “not a real attorney” (uh, yeah, she absolutely is) and refusing to drop Cahill, which Faye counters by informing Harvey that she’ll represent Cahill instead (I told you she’s a real attorney) because Harvey’s involvement is a conflict of interest, which she knows for a fact because—wait for it—she read Malik’s affidavit from Kevin Miller “swearing that [Harvey] conspired with Sean Cahill to get Mike Ross out of prison.” Harvey blows her off by claiming that he has “actual work to do,” as though the affidavit doesn’t implicate Cahill exactly as much as it implicates Harvey, and at this point it’s really inarguable that Harvey deserves to be arrested for something, I don’t even particularly care what it is anymore. Maybe someone’ll frame him for murder, that’d be a fun change of pace.

So I hope no one took that bet that Louis would hold his tongue during his meeting with Richmond, because after a brief back-and-forth that ends with Richmond declaring that Esther’s company is his now, Louis absolutely loses it, yelling that Richmond is a “piece of shit” and that he knows what he did, threatening to “come right after [him]” if he doesn’t give up on the merger deal. Richmond basically admits to having assaulted Esther but says he’ll charge her with slander if Louis doesn’t drop the issue, and I know this isn’t Law & Order: SVU or anything, but seriously, this plotline is being handled with all the tact and deftness of a baked potato.

Reviewing the massive trove of documents they received during that magical one-hour discovery, Cahill makes what in hindsight is an excellent point when he asks if “Mike Ross [was] really dumb enough to straight up tell his cellmate what he did.” Harvey defends Mike by saying that they needed Kevin to trust them, and Cahill complains that if Kevin doesn’t recant, he’s going to “slap him with a parole violation and he’s going back to prison” (what?), although Harvey points out that would make Cahill guilty of witness tampering, so maybe let’s not. Alex, who’s helping them out because how’s he supposed to earn his pay this week if he’s not on camera, suggests using the power of the SEC to put pressure on Malik, because “this is a vendetta, and when it goes south, it’s gonna look as bad for Malik’s superiors as it does for him.” Assuming it does go south, of course, but I’ve certainly never accused any of these guys of any sort of modesty before and now seems a terrible time to start. Meanwhile Alex will keep investigating why Malik is doing all this now, being that “the Sutter case was in the public record and so was Mike’s release,” and that was like…three years ago. I think. Point is, it’s been awhile.

To answer Alex’s totally legitimate question about the suspicious timing of all this, Harvey arranges a meeting with Kevin Miller, who explains that he was given immunity (I guess for his nonexistent role in the conspiracy), contingent upon his not warning Harvey what Malik was up to, in exchange for his testimony, because “if [Malik] convicted Cahill and [Kevin and his wife Jill] didn’t cooperate, he’d void the deal [they] made, Jill would go to prison, and [Kevin would] go with her.”

Okay so first of all, this threat relies on Malik convicting Cahill, but without Kevin’s testimony, he basically has no case, so that means nothing. Second, if he’s talking about the immunity deal he offered at the start of that conversation, what the hell does he have to offer Kevin immunity for, and if he’s talking about the deal Harvey made with Cahill acting on behalf of the SEC, the SEC is definitely not under the purview of the judiciary of New York, so Malik really doesn’t have the authority to go around overturning it in the first place. And I mean I get Kevin not knowing that before he gave his testimony, but why wouldn’t Harvey mention it? Like, right now?

Then Kevin smugly confides that “[Malik has his] affidavit, but he doesn’t have proof,” referring to Harvey’s recording of Sutter, but, dude, an affidavit is proof. Either that, or Kevin committed perjury, in which case he’s probably going back to prison no matter what deal Malik does or doesn’t have the authority to overturn. The one useful hint Kevin has to offer is that whoever set Malik off on the warpath after all this time, it wasn’t Sutter, because Sutter died eight months ago, so I guess this wasn’t a total waste of time after all. The big problem now is that Malik couldn’t have gotten this information from anyone but Sutter, but there’s no record of them ever having spoken; never fear, though, because Donna’s on the case! Turns out the information was a deathbed confession to another inmate. But who?

Pause on that one while Esther rips into Louis for breaking his promise not to tell anyone about the assault. Louis wants her to go public, she doesn’t want to do that to her kids, there’s a lot of yelling, and she tells him to leave both her and the issue alone.

So who heard the deathbed confession? Returning guest star and resident creeper Charles Forstman! Forstman admits that he arranged all of this specifically to spite Harvey, of course, and refuses Harvey’s offer to maybe get Cahill to possibly cut his remaining sentence in half in exchange for giving up the goods because “the side [he’s] on is always gonna be the side that’s against [Harvey].” Side note, he is easily my favorite character in this episode, and this is very much my favorite scene.

Part II

[junker-town]

How to turn a non-contender into the Oakland A’s in a few easy steps

Maybe they’re not easy steps, but you should still follow them.

In 2014, the A’s sent five players to the All-Star Game and carried a 7-3 lead into the eighth inning of the American League All-Star Game. They went to the bathroom, and everything was on fire when they came out, including the cat. They were 68-94 the next year, and 69-93 the year after that. They had flown too close to the sun on wings made of Brett Lawrie, and they were doomed for the next several years.

In 2018, the A’s might be the most exciting team in baseball.

A lot can happen in four seasons, we know that. Consider that the teams that did make it to the ALCS in 2014 might not combine for 100 wins this year. Still, it’s always remarkable to see a team completely reverse their record in a single offseason, especially when they don’t spend a lot of money to get there.

It’s time, in your best David Byrne voice, to wonder, well, how did we get here? It wasn’t just by letting the days go by. The A’s built a contender with roughly 828 trades and signings, and when they win, they do it in a way that makes other owners jealous. They’re having their low-payroll cake and eating it too, and if you want your team to follow suit, here are some lessons for you:

Trade your closer, dummy

This is a simple truism, and it’s not like the A’s invented it. The Royals traded Kelvin Herrera early in the trade season this year, and the Rangers followed suit with Keona Kela shortly after.

When the A’s did it, though, Sean Doolittle was both under contract for several years at below-market prices and a fan favorite. It’s very, very tempting to keep a reliever like that, even if there are shiny prospects being offered. The low cost will make a team think it’s the kind of luxury they deserve. They need to treat themselves.

Instead the A’s took Doolittle and turned him into one of the best pitching prospects in baseball and — more on Blake Treinen in a minute — their new closer. They’re as good in the present, and they’re better equipped for the future. How does a team feel confident enough to do this? Well, you just have to ...

Trust your people

The smart people whispering in your ear, that is. This A’s team wasn’t built by Brad Pitt during a three-act arc. There’s a team of smart people working to improve every baseball team, and the people making decisions have to believe that their smart people are smarter than the other smart people. Blake Treinen is a great example.

Personally, I call him Tri-Nen because he’s like three Robb Nens stapled together, ha ha, is this thing on?

The A’s took a freakish, high-velocity sinker and trusted that their smart people could work with it. They did. They did the same with the dinger-mashing potential of Mark Canha, the patient foundation of Nick Martini, and the dinger-mashing reality of Khris Davis. They said, yes, this [unique skill] is something to build on. We just have to make sure our smart people build on it. Which they did.

We’re a decade into everyone misunderstanding Moneyball, but here’s the purest proof that it wasn’t just about stats. No one looking at Treinen’s K/BB was giddy about him. No one looking just at Davis’ OBP was convinced he was the answer.

And when one of those smart people says, “Signing Jonathan Lucroy is a good idea,” you listen to them, too. Because maybe they’re right. If they aren’t, well, hope that the other good ideas from the smart people paid off.

(Full disclosure: I was a huge fan of the Lucroy signing. I am not one of the smart people. Why are you even here right now?)

Spend money on fifth starters with promise

If the trade-your-closer thing is old hat, if that’s the playbook that every bad team is expected to follow, then try this one: Always sign a fifth-starter with a high ceiling.

Sometimes this is a good idea because you can always trade the starter at the deadline. Get a couple good months and see if a contending team will bite. But in the A’s case, this was a good idea because prodigal son Trevor Cahill is helping them win baseball games exactly when they need to.

There are different kinds of fifth starters and minor-league free agents, but an overwhelming majority have a scouting report that reads something like ...

Has a solid arm. Will keep you in ballgames for the most part. Doesn’t throw that hard, but knows how to pitch.

These are the scouting reports that should interest teams that are already contending, especially if they have young pitchers who are ready to break through. A team like the A’s, coming off a dismal season, needs someone with a higher ceiling than that. Here, pick one of the minor-league free agent archetypes:

A pitcher with a freaky sinker and intermittent effectiveness whose biggest problem has been health

A high-velocity monster who misses bats when he’s in the zone ... which isn’t often enough

A lefty with great minor-league numbers but stuff that won’t translate to the majors unless his command greatly improves

A proven veteran who would have secured a hefty contract if he were healthy, but who bounced around because of injuries

Bartolo Colon

There are others, but the A’s went with the first one, taking a chance on Cahill’s wonder-sinker. In a season with a lot of uncertainty in their rotation, the risk paid off.

When you get a chance to draft Nolan Arenado, do it

Another way to title this section is “Get lucky as hell,” but that unfairly dismisses some of the skill involved. There were 24 teams that passed on Matt Chapman. You can give a pass to the Phillies, who drafted Aaron Nola, and at least a couple other teams who are still happy with their selection, but the idea that a third baseman with this kind of spidey-sense and power could slip that far is absurd. He’s just about the perfect two-way player, and he’s helping the A’s win more baseball games than Alex Jackson is helping the Mariners.

A less fatalistic way to explain this is “Draft better than the other teams,” which is another obvious truism. My favorite part of Moneyball was the part with Matt Cain. Still, the A’s jumped on Chapman, just like they jumped on Chad Pinder, long after other teams had passed. The A’s are improbably built on a blockchain of transactions and micro-transactions and trades and subtrades, but they still used the draft better than a lot of teams. Chapman is proof of that, even if there sure are a lot of misses around him.

There’s more to the A’s than all this. They had to do their due diligence when trading Ben Zobrist at the trade deadline (Sean Manaea). They had to scramble and pick up a fifth starter on the fly (Edwin Jackson). They had to spend a teensy bit of money (Yusmeiro Petit, Lucroy, Cahill), and they had to have the depth to help weather the storms created by the shots that didn’t go in the goal (Lucroy, Matt Joyce, Jake Smolinski, Brett Anderson, Santiago Casilla, Chris Hatcher, look, they can’t hit on every wild idea).

Add it up, and they have a surprise contender. Your team could, too, if they would follow these rules. The A’s were a non-entity last year, and now they’re challenging the powerhouse Astros, who needed years and years of tippy-top draft picks to get here. All it takes is [waves arms] all that. Your team should do all that.

Just know that it doesn’t always have to work, but it sure looks like it’s working this time. And, boy, is it fun to watch.

[placetobenation]

Hey-hey! It’s finally time to post up another PTB Power Rankings for the 2018 MLB Season. So, dust off those cleats, pull your bats out of storage, and find a glove that still fits because we are BACK and ready to, uh, well, rank 30 teams in opinionated order of performance.

Shit, well, it’s good to get back to it anyway.

Yes, Miggy, the first PTB MLB Power Rankings of the year are FINALLY out!

Editor’s note: Truly sorry about my lack of sports/baseball stuff, Nation. Grad school, unemployment, re-employment, and a lot of busy-ness at work have a way of sidetracking things. And once out of a habit, well, you know…

All records and stats are current as of Saturday, June 9, 2018.

1. New York Yankees (42-18) — The Bronx Bombers have won nine of their last 10, they’re playing .700 ball, and are the only team in MLB that has yet to lose 20 games. Ridiculous.

2. Boston Red Sox (44-21) — Personally, I find it quite boring when these two superpowers lead MLB. However, with the BoSox ripping up the league with 5.22 runs scored per game (second to the Yanks at 5.54), 600 team hits, 144 doubles, and 95 home runs, the offense is in *ahem* full swing. Solid support for Chris Sale (2.83 ERA), Rick Porcello (3.59), and David Price (4.00) and what has been a pretty good bullpen.

3. Houston Astros (41-25) — The defending champs are allowing the fewest runs in MLB (3.02 per game) while offensive core stalwarts Jose Altuve (142 OPS+), Carlos Correa (130 OPS+), Alex Bregman (136 OPS+), and George Springer 145 OPS+). Oh, and Justin Verlander (262 ERA+) and Gerrit Cole (176 OPS+) are posting best-ever seasons.

4. Seattle Mariners (40-24) — Listen, there are only four teams with 40+ wins to this point in the season (Milwaukee, see below, is at 39 as of this writing). The AL has all four them. The Mariners are probably the least likely to maintain, but, hey, those 40 are in the bank.

5. Milwaukee Brewers (39-25) — Raise your hand if you figured the Brewers posting the NL’s best record this far into the season. The offense has been alright (4.39 runs a game) as has the pitching overall (3.72 runs allowed), but that bullpen has been great (2.54 ERA). Josh Hader, in particular, is out-of-this-world. Getting ace Jimmy Nelson back soon could put the Brew Crew over the top.

6. Chicago Cubs (37-24) — Just half a game behind the Brewers, with six everyday batters posting OPS+ numbers over 100 (average). The bullpen features a whole bunch of sub-3 ERAs and Jon Lester (7-2, 2.22) has been great atop the rotation. While all those arms could regress, the solid showing at the plate from the Cubbies should keep them in the midst of October talk.

7. Washington Nationals (36-26) — The injuries have mounted for the Nats, but Max Scherzer has been healthy and continues his march towards Cooperstown. Teen phenom Juan Soto has been awesome in his 19-game introduction (.328/.435/.552) with a very promising 11-10 BB-to-K ratio.

8. Atlanta Braves (37-27) — The Bravos seem to have arrived a year ahead of schedule, but this team looks real good for a dynastic run, with Freddie Freeman (28), Ozzie Albies (21), Dansby Swanson (24), Ronald Acuna (20), and top hurlers Mike Foltynewicz (26) and Sean Newcomb (25) all well ahead of the curve.

9. Los Angeles Angels (37-28) — Mike Trout. We need to appreciate him more. Here’s his current line: .306/.439/.646, 1.085 OPS, 198 OPS+, 52 runs, 70 hits, 15 doubles, 19 homers, 13 steals (no caught stealings), 53-53 K-BB rate. And the dude is still only 26. Insane. Now, how the Halos hang around with Shohei Ohtani’s elbow woes remains in doubt, but the dominance of the Millville Meteor is of no question.

10. St. Louis Cardinals (35-27) — Only Jose Martinez (145 OPS+) and Tommy Pham (118) are really raking for the Redbirds, but strong starts from Miles Mikolas (2.27 ERA), Michael Wacha (2.47), and Carlos Martinez (1.83) are keeping the Cards alive in the Central and in the thick of things for a postseason spot.

This guy is really, really, really, amazingly good at baseball.

11. Philadelphia Phillies (32-30) — A week or so ago, these guys would rate much better, but the Phils have got 1-7 in June. The talent is there, but the next big test for rookie manager Gabe Kapler will be righting the ship.

12. Arizona Diamondbacks (34-29) — Remember back in April when Arizona was the toast of baseball with a 28-8 record? Yeah, well, going 14-21 since has certainly put that in the distant past. Of note, though, Paul Goldschmidt seems to waking up (13-for-20 with four homers over his last four games). It’s a thoroughly mediocre division to this point, so the winner of the NL West may well wind up being the team that takes best advantage of when its best players produce.

13. Cleveland Indians (33-29) — The lowest-rated division leaders here, the Tribe has played well at home (20-11) but been the pits away (13-18). While they’re still pretty odds-on to win the Central, that vaunted bullpen (worst in MLB with a 5.82 ERA) has a chance to torpedo anything beyond that. Of note, Cleveland could be the first team since 1920 to lead MLB in bullpen ERA one year (2.89 in 2017) and then finish dead-last the next.

14, 15, 16 (tie). Colorado Rockies, Los Angeles Dodgers, San Francisco Giants (32-32) — The Rockies’ regression was expected from last year, while the Dodgers have been hit by more injuries than a clown car at a demolition derby, and the Giants have managed to hang around via a great home record (19-11). With a little luck and health, any of these three could challenge for the division crown, or a wildcard berth.

17. Detroit Tigers (31-35) — They are not a good team, but also not as bad as once thought. While they should still look to trade guys like Shane Greene, Michael Fulmer, and a few others, this is a very fun team to watch when they are playing well. Ron Gardenhire deserves a lot of credit here. He won’t get many (any?) votes, but this is what a Manager of the Year looks like, folks.

18. Oakland Athletics (33-32) — Trevor Cahill. Blake Treinen. Matt Chapman. Matt Olson. Mark Canha. Raise your hand if you knew these were five members of the 2018 Oakland A’s and not the roster of some non-descript mid-90s boy band. Personally, I prefer Matty C. over Matt O. And that Trevor. He’s so good to his mother.

19. Minnesota Twins (27-34) — Injuries, starting with Ervin Santana in February, have not stopped dogging this team. It’d be a real shame if we don’t get to appreciate Byron Buxton fully because of his health. However, Eddie Rosario (.318/.355/.566) with 14 home runs has been a real breakout star for these erstwhile preseason darlings.

20. Pittsburgh Pirates (31-33) — The Pirates have a talent core of players. They have a gorgeous ballpark. They have a devoted fanbase. But they also have a shitty ownership group that refuses to give said fans what they want — a winner. The hard part should be developing your supporting cast, not paying for the top-tier talent.

21. Toronto Blue Jays (29-35) — Oh, well. That window sure closed in a hurry. A selloff could bring some much-needed youth ot the Jays, as well as adding intrigue to the wild-card races around the league.

22. San Diego Padres (30-36) — I can’t believe I’ve got them this high, either. Clearly, Eric Hosmer’s will-to-win-veteran-presence even affects mid-season rankings. In truth, the Friars have a great bullpen, which, if they wish to sell off, could bring in some depth to an already-well-liked farm system.

Hey Eddie! Yeah, you. Sorry about your team. But hey, great season so far, mate!

23. Tampa Bay Rays (29-34) — The “opener” trend seems like grasping at straws to be innovative, like Kevin Cash wants Michael Lewis to write a book about him or something. That said, despite a horrid start to the year, and a veritable Who’s That? roster, these guys are not all that bad. They are not good either. They are the bologna and cheese on white bread of the American League. Mustard optional.

24. New York Mets (27-34) — Well, they did the right thing by dumping C— Harvey, but this team is still just Mets-ing all over the place. Losers of eight straight, with whispers they might deal deGrom or Thor. I’m sure if those trades happen, this organization will find a way to Mets those up too.

25. Texas Rangers (27-40) — It’s nice to see National Treasure Bartolo Colon pitching well. He’s old and fat, so we should adore him. I guess. I’m actually a bit lost on his precise appeal.

26. Cincinnati Reds (22-43) — The mere fact that C— Harvey shares a team with Joey “The Last Angry Canadian” Votto, and Tucker “What A Great Last Name” Barnhart, boils my blood and causes me night sweats. Also, the pitching stinks.

27. Chicago White Sox (21-41) — Lucas Giolito lead the Pale Hose with four wins, but has a 7.08 ERA. Meanwhile, Jose Abreu (139 OPS+, team-high 24 doubles) is an island unto himself.

28. Kansas City Royals (22-43) — The Royals are giving up 5.52 runs per game. The Yankees have scored 5.54 runs per game. That’s right, folks! When the Royals are in town, it’s just like watching the Yankees!

29. Baltimore Orioles (19-44) — It’s pretty clear Buck Showalter doesn’t care anymore, does it? While we all know Manny Machado is great at baseball (166 OPS+) and will be traded, just gander at the awfulness of Chris Davis’s season (.152/.232/.232, four home runs, a 30 OPS+). It’s soooooooo gross!

30. Miami Marlins (23-41)  — No, the Marlins are not last because of my spite over how they have been a joke forever, constantly screw over fans, and make a mockery of competition. No, it’s not because their current and former owners are emblematic of the excessive awfulness of capitalism . No, it’s not because they plead “process” over “results” whenever someone rightly gives them a second look. It’s because they suck. Last in runs scored per game (3.48) and tied for fifth-worst in runs allowed (5.14) should do.

And with that, we are back in the pink with our Power Rankings. I hope to bring you guys more MLB goodness throughout the rest of the year when time allows. Until then, it’s batter up and play ball!

[the-telegraph-sport-yahoopa-blog]

Telegraph Fantasy Football 16/17 tips: Week 24 round-up

Four of the top six teams dropped points in Week 24, with Chelsea and Arsenal the only sides picking up wins. Tottenham fought back from 2-0 down to rescue a point at Manchester City, while Liverpool were stunned in the early kick-off by relegation contenders Swansea City.

Wayne Rooney became Manchester United's all-time top goal scorer as Jose Mourinho's side drew 1-1 at Stoke and Everton picked up a fourth win in five thanks a late Seamus Coleman winner. 

Player of the week

Maya Yoshida was the surprise player of the week, topping the scoring charts with 14 TFF points. The defender bagged two consecutive clean sheets for Southampton in the FA Cup and Premier League.

Credit: John Sibley

Manager of the week

Richard McNamara from Stalybridge was the manager of the week, scooping himself a £200 first prize. His team, Southampton 1, chalked up a whopping 119 TFF points, almost three times the average score of 42.

Our predicted best XI

Each week, we predict the best player from each of the 10 fixtures. In Week 24, 55 points were accumulated, 20 of which came from Liverpool's midfield maestros James Milner and Roberto Firmino - who linked up for both of the Reds' goals in their 3-2 defeat to Swansea.

Our predicted best XI for Week 24.

Saturday

Liverpool 2-3 Swansea City

Saturday's midday kick-off set the tone for an action-packed weekend of football as Swansea produced one of the upsets of the season and took all three points from Anfield.

£5.3m rated Philippe Coutinho made his long-waited return to Liverpool's starting XI but couldn't make an impact on the game, despite making his way back into 10% of all TFF teams.

Instead, it was Swansea's Fernando Llorente who took the plaudits, scoring twice before Roberto Firmino's double made it 2-2.

Rather than capitulating as you'd expect from a side in the bottom three, Swansea kept pushing on and were rewarded for their endeavours when Gylfi Sigurdsson slotted past Simon Mignolet with just 15 minutes left to play.

Star player: Fernando Llorente (£4.9m) 12 points

Llorente now has eight goals for the season and could be the man that helps Paul Clement keep the Swans in the Premier league.

Credit: Ed Sykes

Bournemouth 2-2 Watford

Bournemouth and Watford played out an entertaining 2-2 draw at the Vitality Stadium.

Christian Kabasele headed in the opener for the Hornets, his third league goal of the season, but Eddie Howe's side struck back shortly after the break with Joshua King turning in Adam Smith's low cross - his seventh key contribution from defence.

Troy Deeney then put Watford back in front, heading in from a corner, but the Cherries found an equaliser once again with substitute Benik Afobe squeezing a shot under the impressive Heurelho Gomes.

Bournemouth have only kept one clean sheet in their last six games, while Watford have just one in 10. Both will need to improve at the back if a top 10 finish is to be acheived this season.

Star player: Troy Deeney (£5.1m) 7 points

Watford's captain has only scored five times this season but was a nuisance all afternoon and fully deserved his goal.

Credit: Copyright (c) 2016 Rex Features. No use without permission./Ian Tuttle/BPI/REX/Shutterstock

Crystal Palace 0-1 Everton

Sam Allardyce still awaits his first league win as Crystal Palace's new manager, this time losing courtesy of a late winner from Seamus Coleman.

Jeffrey Schlupp made his debut for the Eagles, while Ronald Koeman kept the same side that beat Manchester City 4-0 which meant Kevin Mirallas starting in attack with Romelu Lukaku.

The Belgian is rated as a £4.2m midfielder so could provide a cheap option for attack-minded TFF managers.

Wayne Hennessey was in stunning form for the hosts and was unlucky not to pick up a clean sheet, although he wasn't helped by the fact Palace were defending with 10 men because of an injury to Schlupp at the time of conceding. 

Star player: Seamus Coleman (£3.6m) 12 points

A full clean sheet and his fourth league goal of the season, this was a fantastic week for the Everton full-back.

Credit: AFP or Licensors/ANTHONY DEVLIN

Middlesbrough 1-3 West Ham

Who needs Dimitri Payet? With their main man looking for a move elsewhere, the group mentality at West Ham seems to have grown stronger and the results on the field are clear for all to see.

Andy Carroll opened the scoring with a routine header from a corner and also grabbed another which should see his TFF ownership rise as a direct result.

'Boro equalised through Christian Stuani but it was a surprise to see them looking so frail at the back when you consider they'd conceded less than any side from 7th-20th prior to this match.

Jonathan Calleri sealed the three points for the Hammers four minutes into stoppage time as his deflected shot went past the helpless Victor Valdes.

Star player: Andy Carroll (£5.2m) 12 points

Three goals in two games for Andy Carroll who now has 46 TFF points for the season.

Credit: PA Wire/Richard Sellers

Stoke City 1-1 Manchester United

Manchester United maintained their impressive unbeaten streak but needed all-time record goal scorer Wayne Rooney to get them out of jail deep into stoppage time.

Juan Mata's own goal had given the hosts an unlikely lead - he was unlucky to see Erik Pieters cross come off him and pass David de Gea, and Lee Camp produced a string of fine saves to deny Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Paul Pogba.

But Wayne Rooney's stunning free kick meant Jose Mourinho's side left with a point which keeps United it touching distance of the top four.

Star player: Wayne Rooney (£6.2m) 6 points

This was a low scoring game in terms of TFF points but Wayne Rooney did enough to be classed as the star man.

Credit: Andrew Boyers

West Brom 2-0 Sunderland

Sunderland sunk to the bottom of the table after being swept aside 2-0 by West Brom.

Darren Fletcher and Chris Brunt were having an internal competition of who could score the best left-footed volley, with the former probably just about pipping him for his ball control in the build-up.

David Moyes' side look destined to be relegated and all this game did was prove that they offer little threat when Jermain Defoe is kept quiet.

Star player: Gareth McAuley (£3.0m) 10 points

Hats off to Gareth McAuley for doing just that - he earned a full clean sheet and a key contribution too.

Credit: PA Wire/Daniel Hambury

Manchester City 2-2 Tottenham Hotspur

This was arguably the most entertaining match of Week 24, as Spurs came from two goals down to draw 2-2 at the Etihad.

The hosts were relentless in the first half with Pablo Zabaleta and Sergio Aguero both going close, but Mauricio Pochettino's side weathered the storm and went in 0-0 at the break.

In the second half, two uncharacteristic Hugo Lloris errors gifted goals to both Leroy Sane and Kevin de Bruyne, but the visitors battled back with Dele Alli and Heung-Min Son both finding the back of the net.

The equaliser was particularly contraversial as Kyle Walker appeared to push Raheem Sterling shortly before the counter attack, a decision which left Pep Guardiola furious. Honours even.

Star player: Kevin de Bruyne (£6.0m) 10 points

This display was the kind of performance that made de Bruyne so popular in TFF 15/16.

Credit: Copyright 2017 The Associated Press. All rights reserved./Dave Thompson

Sunday

Southampton 3-0 Leicester City

Southampton ended a run of four straight defeats by dispatching Leicester 3-1 at St. Mary's. 

The champions have only won once in their last seven matches and are now just five points above the bottom three. What's more worrying is that they return to Champions League action in February which could distract them further from their league duties.

As for the Saints, goals from James Ward-Prowse, Jay Rodriguez and Dusan Tadic were enough to seal three comfortable points.

Star player: Maya Yoshida (£3.0m) 7 points

Two clean sheets in Week 24 propelled the defender to the top of the Week 24 scoring charts.

Credit: Jason Cairnduff

Arsenal 2-1 Burnley

Alexis Sanchez scored a 98-th minute penalty as 10-man Arsenal beat Burnley 2-1.

The Gunners have taken the lead courtesy of a Skhodran Mustafi header on the hour mark but the pendulum swung back in Burnley's favour when Granit Xhaka was given a straight red - his ninth in the last three seasons.

Sean Dyche's side rallied and were awarded a 93rd minute penalty which Andre Gray dispatched, only to give one away themselves just five minutes later.

The result was critical for Arsenal who leapfrogged their rivals Tottenham into second.

Star player: Alexis Sanchez (£6.0m) 7 points

Sanchez keeps delivering for Arsenal this season. He now has 15 goals and 12 key contributions for the season.

Credit: AFP or Licensors/IAN KINGTON

Chelsea 2-0 Hull City

Table-toppers Chelsea rounded off Week 24 with a comfortable 2-0 win over Hull.

Ryan Mason was taken off after just 13 minutes after fracturing his skull in a collision with Gary Cahill, but fortunately the Tigers midfielder has been reported to be in a stable condition.

As for the goals, Diego Costa returned to the Blues' starting line-up and he scored the opener before Cahill added a second late on. Can anyone catch Antonie Conte's side?

Star player: Gary Cahill (£4.1m) 12 points

A captain that lead by example, Cahill has been sensational for Chelsea this season.

Credit: AFP or licensors/BEN STANSALL

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