#S.A.O.L

[mx-barnes]

Stronger than All Other Loves

(S.A.O.L)

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Part 1-Drowning (Oct. 15, 2021)

Part 2-Grieving (Oct. 20, 2021)

Part 3-It’s you (Oct. 25, 2021)

Part 4-Fighting (Nov. 1, 2021)

Part 5- Escape (Nov. 8, 2021)

Part 6-A Chance (Nov. 16, 2021)

Part 7- Beginning of Something Beautiful (Nov. 28, 2021)

This is the end of this series but maybe a sequel???

[mx-barnes]

Fighting

Bucky x Reader

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: Swearing, cutting (briefly mentioned in the past and the wounds reopening), talk of nightmare, talk of killing Nat, and almost Wanda (it’s in the nightmare), Hydra, talk of readers past, Steve being in love with reader but reader being an idiot, Tony being an asshole, guilt-tripping, accusing reader of cheating, Tony and Steve get into a fight a single a punch is thrown, kinda also an ED not having the appetite to eat, reader feeling like they aren’t good enough, comment is made about how they are strong enough because they cut (although it is so not true), phone call and falling asleep with Bucky.

A/n: This one was a bit harder to write just because it talks about sh and since it’s something that I struggled with I wrote from my experience with it everyone’s experience is different. If you need help don’t be afraid to ask

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Previously on S.A.O.L

You were ultimately sad when you woke the next morning to find that the call had ended. Not from someone hanging up no it was since you had stupidly forgotten to plug your phone in. You weren't used to having to plug in your phone. Hell, you weren't used to having a phone at all. Even though you had had it for nearly 2 years doesn't mean you get used to it. For one strange reason or another you remember hearing Bucky's name somewhere and you remember his sharp features from somewhere but you weren't sure. Where ever it was from you couldn't help the feeling that something in the past loomed over him, such as yourself. Shuddering at the thought of what you had done in the past.

This was also the first night you had almost slept through. You had only had one nightmare. You remember the dream vividly. You had been walking around the street casually when out of nowhere a voice spoke your trigger words. Ice. Drain. Petal. Becoming. Yellow. Sixteen. Lilac. Rusted. Book. Perfection. You were activated, your mission to kill the Avengers. You had been successful in infiltrating the tower and moved quickly to Natasha's room strangling her, then moving to Wanda and Vision's room. As you were just about to kill Wanda you woke up screaming. You hadn't woken any of the other Avengers (soundproof walls), but you had awakened Bucky.  He called out your name on the other end of the line. His calm voice soothing you slowly back into sleep.

You felt bad so you felt you had to apologize to him. So you plug in your phone and fix yourself breakfast. Which just so happens today it's going to be coffee and a single grape because that's all you could stomach. You enter your room once again and decide it's time to allow actual light into your usual dark space. Your room is filled with a single bed placed off to the side and a dresser. It was designed after your cell you were placed in at HYDRA. Even after 3 and a half years at the compound it never felt like home. You had some great friends like Steve, Wanda, and Bruce but no matter how hard you tried to customize your room it always resulted in the same thing. A bed off in the corner and a dresser half full. It must have been your agent training always to keep minimal things and always be able and ready to move at all times.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a small knock on the door frame. Turning to face the sound you notice Steve standing there.

"I figured you probably hadn't eaten yet so I made some pancakes if you wanted to come to eat some." his voice warm and inviting.

"Actually I have already eaten I should be good," you reply with a certain coldness in your voice that you didn't mean to be there yet it was.

"What did you eat because I am willing to bet it is not enough?" Steves concern is touching.

"I had some coffee and a grape. That's all I could eat Steve." you look to meet his eyes hoping he won't push you to eat more but he does.

"You need to eat at least one pancake if not for yourself for me." his eyes begged.

"Fine," you say as you remove the hoodie you had on revealing the scars on your arms that had been reopened a couple of nights ago. They catch Steve's eye.

"Darling did you start cutting again."

Ashamed you hide the cuts that cascade up and down your arms. Steve walks over towards you. "I have a friend who went through something similar to what you went through. I'm gonna call him. See if he can't help you. Maybe even help with the nightmares." He brushed his hand against your cheek as he leaned down to kiss your head.

It was a simple gesture but there was something so domestic about it. Which made you hate it even more. Domesticity was not something you welcomed lightly into your life the last time that happened you ended up getting hurt. You wished you hadn't winced or cringed away as hard you did because the look on Steve's face was hurt.

"Sorry, it's not. I just hate domesticity I don't believe I deserve it." your voice broke. That was the first time you actually admitted to anyone that you didn't feel like you deserved a good life how could you. You had killed hundreds. Their families just thought it was a mugging gone wrong but in fact, you had killed them in cold blood because they stood in the way of HYDRA's plans for the world. You killed them with the power you posed. A simple flick of your finger and a guy could choke. You were honestly scared of yourself but you couldn't show fear so you just steeled over any feelings. Finally, those walls were breaking down around Steve. You had already let in Tony and that ended up with you crying on your bathroom floor crying.

"You deserve everything Y/n. Don't let your past define you. Don't let the fact that you were once forced to use your power to kill hold you back from helping with it now."

How are you supposed to not worry about the people you had killed. Move on from them and just help people. How were suppose to help people when you had hundreds of people's blood on your hands. That was only almost a decade of work. Where the winter soldier someone HYDRA respected and held in high regard while you were training there had only 100 or so credited political assignations. Where your kill count was a lot higher he could be saved but could you? You weren't brainwashed. You were trained to kill or there would be punishments so if you call that brainwashing then yeah you were brainwashed. You had red in your ledger. Much like Natasha did. Where she could clear her ledger you weren't sure even a hundred years could clear it.

For the first year, you were with the Avengers you didn't do many missions. You weren't stable enough. You had some problems with finding the line between good and evil you still had troubles sometimes. Tony had slowly started showing you this line but when he broke up with you. You spiraled you had kept it in check for the first bit. Things drastically changed on that mission you almost died. So once again you were grounded despite being older than everyone but Steve. You had more experience fighting than any of them. Sure you were fighting in the shadows for most of your "career" you still had more experience than any of them.

"Don't go doubting yourself again. Listen you are not that person anymore. You are a good person Y/n. You couldn't help what you did."

"That's the thing Steve I could. I could have stopped myself."

"No, you couldn't have. Even if you did you would've been beaten. Y/n you're not the same person you were 70 years ago. You feel remorse for those you killed. Come here." Steve beckoned you closer to him.

"Steve-"

He wrapped his arms around you stopping you from finishing your sentence, "Y/n I wouldn't have petitioned the government back in the 40s if I thought you were a bad person. So come eat some pancakes." He said as he pulled you out of your room in your t-shirt.

You walk out slightly embarrassed cause this would be the first time that the team would ever see the scars on your arms. Although it was still pretty early in the morning most of the team was already up. Today was a training day so of course, everyone had to be up for Steve's famous pancakes.

You hide your arms as soon as you walk into the kitchen. Steve's arm was still around you and he felt you tense up. So he let go of you and pull off the hoodie he had on and order you to lift your arms above your head and he slid the hoodie over your arms and onto your body then grabbed you once again and walked with his arm around your shoulders. You relaxed a little bit knowing that it knows the team wouldn't know about your scars. It's not that you didn't want them to know it's just you don't know how they would react. Of course Tony knew he saw them a lot. He was actually the first person who had found out. You wanted to keep them hidden cause you felt ashamed. Ashamed you weren't strong enough to restrain yourself from cutting. Every time you saw them it made your heartbreak but Tony had assured you it was normal and that anyone who had gone through what you had would. He knew because although he didn't go through what you went through he went through something similar.

You walk into the kitchen and notice the glare Tony seems to be giving you.

"Hey Y/n," Tony's eyes don't leave the hoodie you have on. Not thinking much of you respond to him.

"Hey Tony."

"So you and Rogers huh?" Tony raises an eyebrow.

"What no. Me and him are just friends. Come on you know this." You defended.

"Are you sure because you were awfully close to him. Come to think of it you were close with him like that when we were dating."

Was this man really trying to guilt-trip you. Did he honestly think you would cheat on him.

"Lay off Stark," Steve barked.

"Coming to the defense pretty quick Rogers. Defending a partner maybe?" Tony questioned.

"Come on Stark you know it's not like that," Steve growled.

"Really Rogers I'm not so sure how do I know they weren't screwing you behind my back?" Tony questioned stepping up to intimidate Steve.

"They weren't and we aren’t screwing around now. Now back done before I knock you down." Steve snarled.

"Ok, boys, boys. You both need to chill the fuck out."

"Tell that to your boy toy," Tony remarked.

That was the last straw. Steve pushed Tony back into the counter. Tony pushed back the first swing was swung by Tony. Really it was a smart idea Steve was a super soldier and so when picking a fight against him it wasn't a good idea. Especially since Tony wasn't in his suit.

"Guys, stop!" you stepped in between them before it escalated. The team didn't really need Tony in the Med bay for something so trivial as this.

"Call off your soldier." Tony snarked.

"Stop being a jackass and maybe we wouldn't be in this situation." Steve snarked right back.

"Both of you need to chill. Steve thank you for defending me but it's fine really," Tony laughed "and you don't think you're getting out of this scott free cause you definitely not. Just because we broke up and I rejected your advances to get back together doesn't mean you can be a dick. But for right now I am my own person and that's how it is gonna be for right now so chill out."

They both huffed out an apology "Good now I'm going to train goodbye."

It's like coming home after a long trip. That's what love is like. It's like coming home. -Piper Chapman

[mx-barnes]

Escape

Bucky x Reader

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: Talk of bad relationship with Tony, talk of proposal that would never come, self doubt, escapism, insecure Bucky, anxiety, cutting, loss of a lot of blood,

A/n: how we feeling about this series. Personallhy I am loving it. I can't believe it's almost done. Ahhh this has been a rollercoaster. Hope you are all enjoying.

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Previously on S.A.O.L

You have always used the training room as an escape. Especially when things with Tony got bad or overwhelming. It wasn't often he would become overwhelming but towards the end of the relationship, it started happening more and more. The beginning was great it was all sweet dates. Whisking you away after missions to go to the cafe down the street or flying to Paris or wherever you felt like that day. The further you got into the relationship the charm started to slip away. You had already fallen. You had been waiting on a marriage proposal cause you swore he was going to be the one you spent the rest of your life with.

You reached the training room and started with a punching bag to hopefully get your frustrations out. You weren't a super soldier so you were at no risk of breaking the bag at least you hoped. When the door squeaked open you turned ready for a fight. Steve and Tony knew better than to come down here while you were mad. The rest of the team did too but you couldn't ban them from the training room because you were mad at Steve and Tony. Even if the only people who would come down here while you were mad were those two.

You turn rapidly ready to kick anyone who dared come in here. Then you notice it's Bucky and wonder why he is here.

"Bucky? What are you doing here?" you questioned.

"Y/n? Why are you here? Wait but that doesn't make any sense." Bucky's mind going a mile a minute.

"What do you mean why am I here. I live here. I work with the Avengers. You still haven't answered my question what are you doing here?"

"Right sorry I am joining the team."

"Right... right ok. Listen if you are gonna be joining the team I can't go on a date with you. I'm sorry," Shying away you begin punching the bag once more. How could you let this happen? The first guy you end up liking since things with Tony ended and he is joining the team. You couldn't do this again. Maybe this was a sign to stop dating.

"What- what do you mean you can't go on a date with me?" Bucky's own insecurities rising to the surface. His mind racing thinking maybe you had found another person. Maybe you found out about his past and now retracting your offer.

Turning back to face him you reassure him, "Don't listen to the voices in your head. It's not because of your past, it'd not because I found someone different no it's because you are joining the team. I can't do this again. You are going to become famous, more so than before you're going to find better and I'd rather save myself the heartache. So if you aren't in here to train please get out,"  tears were collecting on your bottom lash line as you turn back to the punching bag for the last time you hope.

Bucky doesn't leave and just awkwardly stares at you. He looks at you awe-struck and stunned at the strength you possess both physical and emotional. To be able to bottle up one's emotions with such grace as you had must have taken years to perfect.

"Listen Y/n I-"

"Don't finish that sentence Barnes," that you turn and head off to the changeroom without so much as a "see ya later."

When you reached your locker you collapsed in front of it. Leaning your head back against the door. The cold, unforgiving tile under you didn't help much either. Your heart started racing. You can't go through the pain again of finding someone you care about then them dumping you for someone better. Your anxiety had officially taken over and now you just felt the feeling of your chest closing in on itself. The feeling of the entirety of the world falling upon your shoulders. Your head slowly feeling light-headed as your breathing became irregular. Flashes of what you believed were to come. Each breath getting heavier and heavier until you officially couldn't take it anymore. You lifted yourself up enough to unlock your locker and grab your shower bag. Shuffling around a little bit in it you found your razor. The razor that had been taken to your wrist many times over the last couple of months and months before. Each time the cuts got deeper and deeper. Holding the razor you look down at your wrist tears flooding your eyes. You place the blade to your wrist apply pressure and swipe. Crimson blood pools onto the blade then spring from the newly formed cut on your wrist. There is a small sting that helps relieve a little bit of the pressure in your chest. Small amounts of blood fall to the ground looking at the newly formed cut on your wrist you cut again.

By the time you stop cutting there are about six pretty big cuts on your wrist. Looking down at the work you had down you realize you have lost a lot of blood but you don't care. Busting through the door though is Steve he first sees the blood pooled around you. He draws his eyes to your face. His own pales. There is so much blood. Quickly he picks you up and rushes you to the medical wing hoping it won't be too late. He can faintly hear your heart and he assumes that is a good sign. You responded sometimes with unintelligible hms or small weak nods. When Steve places you down on the hospital bed Bruce starts work almost immediately. He had been trained for this type of thing and he has had to patch you up multiple times in the past.

You were quickly bandaged. You had about two IVs stuck in your arms one giving you back the blood you had lost the other giving you the essential fluids. Steve sat at your bedside waiting for you to wake up. He was always there for you when you needed him most. It was his job he was your best friend and recently (besides Wanda) your only friend.

It was about an hour or two before you finally woke up. Steve was up talking in hushed tones to Bruce.

"Are they going to be ok?"

"They should be ok. As long as they keep drinking water and eat food."

Huffing to yourself you know they are going to force you to stay in this bed until you are better and your fluids and sugars are replenished. Steve turns to you and sees that you're awake so he slowly approaches you.

"Hey, glad you're awake. Missed talking to you."

"Ok, sure Steve. Listen I don't want to stay in here please don't make me stay in here. It smells like bleach and antiseptic wipes please Steve it smells too clean," you nag although you know that it won't get you very far you hope for just this once that Steve will let you stay in your own room for your healing process.

"Y/n you know I can't let you do that. It's for your own safety. You know that I just want to look out for you. Please don't fight me on this," Steve begs.

"FIne but I don't want to see anyone come through that door except you, and only the most essential doctors, if not I am breaking out of here. Got it?" you raise your eyebrow waiting for him to disagree.

"On one condition you tell me why."

"Deal."

Steve looked at you with an expectant shine in his eye. Bruce quietly leaves to give you and Steve some privacy.

"Steve. I- I am sorry I worried you. I was better and I was getting over Tony. It still hurt, but I was getting better," you paused looking him in the eye, he only nodded encouraging you to continue. So you did, "I found someone. He was sweet, kind, we had been talking for a little bit and then he joined the team," that caught Steve's attention there had only been one new member who recently joined and that was Bucky.

"Bucky?"

"Yeah, anyways so when I heard he was joining the team I guess I kind of lost it. I lost control, my emotions ran wild and so I did the one thing I knew that would calm them. God Steve, I really like him but every time I think of even trying it with him I just I-"

"Flashback to how things ended with you and Tony."

"Yeah is that wrong. I mean he is a completely different person. I know that, and he- he has this sense about him. I get it when I'm with you. Like he knows what it's like to travel through time."

"That's because he has. You know Bucky is from our time as well right?" Steve questions.

"No, I didn't know. I should've guessed by the flip phone. You had one for the longest time," you laugh a bit.

"Yeah, I did but so did you," he points out.

"Yes but I upgraded a lot faster than you," you poke at him.

"That you did, that you did," silence falls over you and him. It's not uncomfortable or awkward just silence.

"Listen Y/n I think you should give the jerk a chance. Take some time to heal but he is a good guy. He may not think so but he is. I want what's best for both of you and hey if he hurts you I'll beat him up for you ok?" Steve smiles. You smile back at him thinking maybe this time it will be ok.

You obviously had some feelings for Steve but he clearly isn't interested in you or else he wouldn't push you to be with Bucky. Boy, were you wrong. It hurt Steve greatly to tell you to go his best friend but he knew that it was best for you.

She was getting better... But then she remembered what she was trying to get away from, she remembered the things that tear her apart. Now she's back at the start. -Anonymous

[mx-barnes]

Grieving

(Stronger than All Other Loves/S.A.O.L)

Bucky x Reader

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Word Count: 1.8k

Warnings: mentions of almost drowning, heartbreak, reader asking for number, fluff ish, Tony wanting reader back,

A/n: Ahh I love this series so much already I cant waiting to write more. Likes and reblogs welcome

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Previousely on S.A.O.L

Grieving is hard. It's even harder when that person is alive but it's evener harder still when you see that person every day. When you see the way his smile lights up a room. When you see the lips you once kissed, kiss someone else. It had been about 2 months from when you almost drowned. 2 months since it was officially over. So like any normal person, Tony was moving on to greener pastures. A strawberry blonde straight hair woman to be exact. She was now smiling at your ex. An entrancing laugh way better than your laugh could ever be. She put up with his late-night tinkering, his unhealthy addiction to coffee. She was confident in herself and knew what she wanted. She obviously didn't worry about you. Care-free at the fact that you and he still worked together every day. If she wanted, she could have him. Even if he were to beg you to take him back, you didn't think you could ever allow him back into your life, not like that. He broke down your walls then once they were safely down he struck. The pain was so unbearable like a thousand rhinoceros tromping on your heart.

You had to get over him no matter how long it took no matter how many guys' or girls' hearts you had to break. You had to be happy you had to move on but how could you do what Tony had just done to you. Break another person's heart. You couldn't. He caused you a lot of pain so how could you go and pass that on to someone else. Pulling you out of your thoughts "Y/l/n. Hey, you there?" Wanda shakes you a little bit "What's going on in that head of yours?"

"Nothing Maximoff. I am fine. What's up?" Tears threatening to spill over the edge.

"Ok, so we are going shopping. We need to get out of here. Especially if she is here." Wanda rolls her eyes in the direction of the girl Tony had over.

Before you can leave Tony's voice calls out. "Hey, Y/n. I want you to meet someone." Tony waves toward him. "This is my girlfriend, Pepper."

"Oh hi," you look at him then turn to the woman. She was gorgeous, "Well Wanda and I were gonna go shopping I'll see you later Tony. Nice meeting you, Pepper," you rushed out of there before they could even respond.

"Hey you ok hun," Wanda puts her arm around your shoulder.

"Yeah fine let's just go to the mall. Please," walking to your car you plead.

"Yeah sure fine let's go." Wanda gets in the passenger seat as you get in the driver's side.

The ride to the mall was filled with screaming lyrics at the top of both of your lungs. Wanda of course is on the aux and she doesn't let the mood drop. She keeps things light like any good best friend is supposed to do after a breakup.

"So I put my hands up. They're playing my song, the butterflies fly away. I'm noddin' my head like, yeah. Movin' my hips like, yeah. I got my hands up, they're playing my song. They know I'm gonna be okay. Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A. Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A." you scream as you pull into the mall parking lot.

Turning off the ignition and stepping outside the car you still mumble the rest of the lyrics to Party in The U.S.A by Miley Cryus. She was an icon. Not caring what any man said. Linking arms with Wanda as you walked into the mall. First, you had to hit up the food court to get a little bit of food before exploring all the new stores even though there were no new stores. Finally, you found your way into a Garage. You and Wanda were just perusing all the different clothes when this cute guy bumped into you making you drop all of your bags. His long dark hair was perfectly styled back. He wore a black leather jacket and black leather gloves. He also wore black military boots, jeans covered the top half of the boot. You could hear the jingle of a chain. Assuming by his military boots it was his dog tags. Steve had a set from when he was in the war.

"Hey watch it buster." Wanda snaps.

"Sorry, here let me help you," he begins to help you pick up your bags.

"Sorry about my friend she can be a little bit confrontational," you smile at him as you lean down to help him.

"Oh no, it's fine really. I'm James, or you can call me Bucky." the stranger says as he hands you your bags back.

"How'd you get Bucky from James? Ah well, it doesn't really matter nice to meet you Bucky," a sparkle caught your eye. His too.

"Yeah. I didn't catch your name."

You needed to get over Tony and this was the perfect way to do it. So you go for the plunge."Hand me your phone,"

"Ok, why?" handing over the flip phone he asks.

"Wow a flip phone I haven't seen one of these in years," you chuckle a bit as he grabs the back of his neck. "Oh no, I am sorry I didn't mean to make fun of you. I actually enjoy simpler technology sometimes." putting in your name and phone number you close the phone and hand it back to him. "Text me sometime." you wink. Leaving him standing in the store.

"Since when did you get game." Wanda nudges you as you leave the store.

"Hey I don't know if he'll actually te-" you're interrupted by a ding on your phone. Wanda looks at you with a cocked eyebrow. You check to see who it's from

Hey, I just wanted to check in. How are you and Wanda doing?

"It's from Steve just wanting to check in," you sigh then another message.

Hey this is Bucky

You start internally freaking out. Wanda notices "He texted didn't he."

"No," heat rushes to your face as you text him back.

Hey it's Y/n

So I finally get to know your name haha

"Ok, I'm glad you're back in the saddle but can we finish shopping then you and him can text. So text him you will talk to him later cause it's my turn with my bestie."

Yeah, guess you do. Sorry, best friend duty calls. Talk soon <3

After a little while, you and Wanda got bored from wandering around the mall and decide to head back. It was around 1 so you decided to stop at a local DQ. You order just a regular burger with fries and coke while Wanda got a shake and a bacon cheeseburger and fries.

"You better not make a mess in my car." glaring at Wanda. She just shrugged her shoulder and started playing music once again.

You pull into the parking lot and exit the car. Grab your bags and food and bring them inside. As you walk in you place your food on the counter as you run to your bedroom to throw your clothes on the bed and get back to your food before the rest of the team smells it and thinks it's a good idea to eat your food. This had happened multiple times you had trained for this moment. Ok, maybe not this exact moment but moments like this. Dropping off the stuff on your bed in a rush and booking it back to the counter.

Luckily you got back to your food before anyone noticed there was food. You start to eat your food when your phone dings. It's a text from Tony.

Meet me in the training area in 5, please

Wondering if it was a good idea or not. If he wanted to train you would be fighting on a full stomach but if he wanted to talk would that be a bad thing. I mean he broke up with you who was he to ask you to meet him. Was he having second thoughts but the breakup was months ago wouldn't he have had his doubts already? The next few minutes seemed to fly by. By the time the 5 minutes was up you hadn't finished your burger. You pushed the meeting with Tony off until you had finished your burger. Your mind was going a mile a minute thinking of all the possibilities he could be asking you down there.

You finished your burger. You then head to your room to change into a pair of comfortable sweatpants and a hoodie because you knew the training area would be cold it always was. The basement was cold and dark as you expected. It was always cold but it seemed especially cold this time. No clue why you call out for Tony. No response. Maybe this was all some practical joke it couldn't be Loki was the trouble maker, not Tony. Once again you call out "Tony." this time a voice answers it is bearably hearable.

You just catch it as it says "Go to the training mat."

Assuming it's Tony you move toward the training mat when the lights flicker on. A picnic blanket and basket are lain out on the mat.

"What is this Stark." There was a familiar tone in your voice.

"It's a recreation of our first date." he smiles hoping that you would too.

"So,"

"Listen I made a mistake breaking up with you. I see that now. I want to win you back. Earn your love again. Prove I'm worthy."

Your phone buzzes it's a text from Bucky

Hey I just wanted to see if your best friend duties were over

Your face starts feeling flush. Tony chuckles a bit thinking it's because of him. Right he's there. "Look Tony it's really sweet that you want to get back together with me but what would your 'girlfriend' think about," You gesture slightly to the mat then turn around and head back upstairs. Tony reaches and tries to grab your arm but fails.

Best friend duties are over and I definitely can talk to you

Ok well how about we get to know each other a little bit

Why not?

Rejecting Tony was hard especially after loving him but it was what needed to happen to clear a path for a new and better life. If you were being honest with yourself Tony was an asshole who needed to check his ego. Thinking he could rekindle the flame that he threw water on months ago. Was pathetic but so like him. The thing is if Bucky hadn't texted you at that exact moment you probably would've said yes despite all the pain Tony had put you through treating you like garbage for the past 2 years. He deserved the cold shoulder you were giving him even though your heart ached for him.

If you spend too long holding on to the one who treats you like an option, you'll miss finding the one who treats you like a priority. -Anonymous

[mx-barnes]

Beginning of Something Beautiful

Bucky x Reader S.A.O.L

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: Bucky being naked, anxious thoughts, big feelings talk, talk of reader also liking Steve and I think that’s it

A/n: ok sorry I forgot this was suppose to go out and I was pushing it off all I had to do was warnings and stuff but I’m kinda sad that this is ending but I may bring it back for like a second series or something Stucky x reader. I know some people not be happy with this ending but I really was struggling with writing this.

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Previously on S.A.O.L

It's a little longer than you want to get you out of the infirmary but finally, once you were out you were set on making things right with Bucky. With that determination though came the anxiety the inevitable thoughts of what-ifs and why would he's in truth you didn't know if you would take you once again if you did what you did.

You were trusting Steve, you were trusting he knew what he was doing and that he wouldn't lead you astray. You weren't only trusting Steve you were trusting Bucky. You were- are trusting Bucky with the important makeup and matter of your heart. Trusting him not to take it and smash it. Once again trusting someone from the team with your fragile heart.

Each step you took to Bucky's room was accompanied by the thudding of your heart. The thrum of potentially losing Bucky forever and with Bucky went Steve. Why would Steve leave you if you somehow had managed to mess things up with Bucky? Steve had known Bucky all his life while you, he had known for a lot less time. You didn't know how you could lose either one. Steve's smile brought a smile to your face when you couldn't muster the strength to find one. Bucky understood the nightmares, the terrors that occupied your subconscious in the dark morning hours.

Finally, you reached Bucky's door. Your confidence failing miserably low but hope is fairly high because if you didn't have confidence you at least had hope. You raised your hand forming a fist. Slowly you rapped on the door and dropped your hand. You waited for something to happen, maybe an invitation in or the door to open, but neither happened. So you knocked once again and called out, "Bucky, can we talk?"

From behind you heard, "Yeah sure in about ten minutes I need to shower and change. Just got back from the gym."

You whip around to see Bucky. He was in a sweat-soaked black t-shirt and a pair of grey track pants. He looked good, very good. He always looked good but today something about him radiated attractiveness. Maybe it was because today you were going to confess your feelings for him? Shaking off the thoughts inside your head you answered, "Yeah. Yeah, take all the time you need. I'll be in my room."

"Why don't you wait in my room, that way I won't have to come to find you?"

Mustering up the courage you squeaked out a pathetic yes and followed him into his room. Once he entered he grabbed a towel and headed towards his connected bathroom.

You sat on the couch in his room waiting for him to come out. It was slow and painful but it was a must. Your nerves were on fire. Your body was quaking. Each second ticking by made you even more nervous. What were you doing? You couldn't confess your feelings towards Buckyg he could've changed his mind since you last talked. Drawing air into lungs it felt like it turned into lead. Then Bucky walked out.

He was shirtless, a towel wrapped around his waist giving you the full view of his abs and the v line of his crotch. He looked good, almost like he was carved out of marble and posed just for your viewing pleasure.

"Like what you see doll?" He teased.

You were star-struck. Each sentence you comprised in your head couldn't fully capture what you wanted to say. Each syllable seemed impossible to speak so your response ended up being just a bunch of mismatched letters.

It seemed like an eternity just looking at the man standing in front of you water droplets rolling off his body and falling behind his towel. Imagining what lay underneath the towel you grew more and more aroused, but you lifted your head to look Bucky in the eye and that's when he spoke once again, "I got to get changed, If you wouldn't mind," he cleared his throat, clearly wanting you to turn around.

Snapping out of your daze you did just that as you felt the blood rush up your face. You managed a weak squeaking "Sorry."

Bucky just laughed, "Quite alright doll, just prefer the first time you see me fully naked you are as well."

That had the heat creeping up your neck. God was he trying to kill you. He managed to somehow show you that you were worth it, that you deserved love. He seemed to be a god. He had the looks of one and just a pure good heart. He had torn down your walls and maybe you were still a little broken and also harbouring feelings for another man. The same feelings neither one stronger than the other but one more easily acceptable than the other. So maybe this was your chance, your chance to make up for all the wrong and harm you had caused in the past because if you can make one person's life more bearable it was worth it. It was worth the endless hollow feeling in your chest when you went without either of the two men you loved. If you could help Bucky maybe you would start to feel whole.

"Bucky," that name felt foreign weird now that he was changing behind you, "James. Listen, I know we got off on a rocky start but would you consider giving me a second chance. A chance to prove to you I'm not a complete asshole."

He looked at you like you had hung the stars and the moon, "Of course, I mean although you turned me down as soon you found out I joined the team it doesn't mean I lost all feelings towards you. I mean look at yourself you are gorgeous. Everything about you screams perfect I see no flaws I see no imperfections you are just a beautiful person. I'm so over the moon that you want to even try this again I would've thought you'd pick Steve. I understand why you fled like that and bailed. I know you were in a real bad relationship before this and when I joined the team it brought back some bad memories and I completely understand that. So please if you'll let me I would like to take you out. Treat you like you should've been treated the first time."

Shocked by his heartfelt speech you just stood there in silence. Wondering what you had done to deserve such a good man. He had let himself be open with you and accepted the pain you had gone through. He had accepted your flaws, your past, he accepted everything. Even if he was at one point the Winter Solider that didn't matter he was brainwashed, forced to do those terrible things. He understood what it was like to be used for a corrupt government. Finally after being stunned and not responding you managed to stutter out a yes. If you couldn't be happy with Bucky who seemed like a perfect gentleman and man how were you supposed to be happy with anyone? Your heart may have still been divided between Steve and him but you knew this was right. You loved Steve as much as you loved Bucky but you knew that it would go nowhere. You had to tell Bucky though. You had to let him know about your feelings towards Steve. Not tonight, not now. You pushed it off for a problem of tomorrow.

<-->

The night seemed to fly by with Bucky at your side. So when you woke up in a tangle of limbs the next morning you weren't surprised to know that you had had no night terrors. Everything was perfect. You didn't want to ruin this bliss you had but you had to. Bucky had aright to know.

You poked him in the shoulder. He didn't move. Again, you poked him in the shoulder, he shifted a bit but ultimately didn't wake up. This time you took a bit rougher approached and shoved his shoulder. That got him up, he was still very groggy but at least he was up.

"Buck we need to talk."

"Yeah ok give me a minute," Bucky grumbled out slurring his words together.

You waited till he sat up and had woken up a bit more, "It's about Steve."

That seemed to wake up Bucky more, "Ok what about the punk?"

"Ok know that this doesn't change how I feel about you or that I don't love you any less," Bucky nodded his assent, "I love Steve not as a friend not as a brother but in a romantic way the same way I love you. I am in love with both of you and as much as it kills me to not be with him as well as you. I know that he doesn't like me like that and I got lucky in knowing that you like me like that. I completely understand if you don't want to be with me after this. I can leave no judgement and lie saying I am just not ready for a relationship we can-"

"Woah doll, slow down ok. This doesn't change how I feel about you. I am pretty sure I love you but I also know that I love Steve, the punk that he is as well. I understand your attraction to him and if it doesn't change anything with us I know we can work this out. Possibly bring up the idea of a poly relationship with him but we can talk more about that later. Let's just lie in for right now and we can talk later I promise," he kissed the top of your head pulling you back down into the bed.

What either of you didn't know is that Steve had heard the whole thing and was jumping for joy. The two people he loved most in that world reciprocated those feelings and while they may not be able to bring it up to them he knew his feelings were reciprocated and he would wait as long as he needed to make the two of them understand that he loved them too.

The end of a story... The beginning of many -picturequotes.com

[mx-barnes]

A Chance

Bucky x Reader S.A.O.L

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Word Count: 1.4k

Warnings: talk of hospitalization, unhealthy coping mechanism, insecure!Bucky, talk of reader being broken, talk of reader sabotaging relationships, talk of reader and Tony dating, talk of gender struggle, heartbroken Steve, Tony being a peice of absoulute trash, reade being made to feel worthless, swearing, talk of suicide attempt, Tony trying to guilttrip/coerce reader back into a relationship with him, talk of sex, Steve pining over reader when they were in a relationship with Tony, talk of readers past kind of.

A/n: Ok so that was a lot more warning than normal but thats ok. A lot happens. This part switches between Buckty and Steve;s prespectives. I am loving this series, I am still debating in making another series after this that follows after because of the minimal response to this one. Let me know of you wanted another one.

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Previously on S.A.O.L

"Steve, I heard Y/n was in the medbay what happened?"

After he got the call saying he should come to the tower because you were in the medbay all he could think was what happened. You weren't on any mission recently at least none that Bucky knew of. As far as he knew you were grounded. You were told that you couldn't participate in any missions whatsoever.

He felt bad. He knew that the team was one unhealthy way you used to cope. Throwing yourself into teamwork and just working and not worrying about yourself. Bucky had learned this all for when you speak to him. When you would call him at night and fall asleep on the phone. That was one reason he upgraded his phone to the one he had now so he could stay up all night talking with you and when you inevitably fell asleep he could listen to your breathing. Maybe it was stalker-like but he did it so he knew you were ok.

"Buck they are fine mainly. It's not my story to tell you how they got there but they are going to be just fine," Steve spoke calmly. Bucky didn't understand how he could be so calm about this you were in that bed alone probably thinking Bucky doesn't care about you when he does. He cares so much.

"Hey, Steve. Did they say anything about me? I know I went to see them when they were in the training room and I don't know I keep replaying the last conversation I had with them."

"Bucky. Listen man they're damaged. Now I am not saying that's a bad thing it is just that they tend to sabotage most of their relationships," Steve tells him honestly. Nothing had been the same since Tony broke up with you and if Steve was being honest with you he had been worried. He cared for you a lot and that is why he was explaining things to this to Bucky because although you really should be telling Bucky all this he knew that you weren't going to explain it all to Bucky so Steve figured it would be a long time before you actually opened up about your feelings which wasn't going to sit with Steve. "Buck they dated Tony. They broke up a while ago and all I know but they also are from the 40s Buck. They struggled with their gender for a long time. They didn't fit in especially in the 40s. You got to talk to them, Buck. I know it may seem hopeless but you got to try."

Bucky nodded, "I'll try because I really like them. They are sweet and just all-around a good person," Steve's heart cracked a bit. He was glad you were finally going to be happy but he was sad that it wasn't going to be with him but that didn't matter because you liked Bucky and he didn't want to ruin his and yours, and his and Bucky's friendship over some feelings.

<-->

Bucky did just as Steve suggested. He was going to try to understand you and keep pushing. Before he had no guidance or even confirmation that you liked him. Maybe the fact that you agreed to the date but in his mind, he was seen as a pity date. Steve had confirmed it though. You had confessed that you liked him but you just didn't want to get hurt once again much like how Tony hurt you before. Bucky promised himself that he wouldn't hurt you. The light in your eye the first time he met you was a good enough reason for him along with the fact that he couldn't imagine hurting you.

<-->

Steve was trying to find the courage to walk back into the room you were in. You had made him promise that only he and medical personal were allowed in where you were but he knew Bucky needed to see you. Bucky needed to see with his own eyes that you were okay and it was not too late to help you. He needed to be reassured that he hadn't pushed you away.

When Steve entered the room Tony was already there. It looked as if Tony was degrading you, making you feel worthless. That's when Steve brain finally registered the words that Tony was saying, "C'mon Y/n you just tried to kill yourself yet again. I'll help you out of this like I did last time you and I had some fun times last time I helped you. C'mon I'll help you in every way possible," too many it may seem innocent but Steve knew the meaning behind the words and his face hardened. His vision turned slightly red.

"Tony, you fucking bastard!" Tony whipped around quickly facing Steve. He looked caught till he schooled his expression back to neutral. His smirk was evident. "Do not speak to Y/n that way. They don't need your fucking help. They are not an object. You don't need to think that they can be helped by just sex-"

"Mind-blowing sex," Tony piped up.

If looks could kill, Tony would be six feet underground with worms and maggots eating away at his worthless body. Growling he spoke "Not the point. Get the fuck out of here and don't come back."

Tony walked up to Steve getting in his face, "You're just pissed I got to tap that and you didn't. Don't think I didn't see the way you would look at them when they were mine, Rogers. They will never be yours now if anyone should leave it should be you," Tony spat.

That's when you spoke up, "No Tony I think you should leave."

Tony twisted so quickly Steve wondered how he still stood straight. "Whatever do you mean."

"You know what they mean. They don't want you in here they don't want you back. You need to leave right now or else. So listen, I don't care if you want to try to get back with them leave them the fuck alone.

"Whatever they aren't fucking worth it anyways," Tony stalks off.

"Steve you didn't have to do that," your voice hoarse from disuse over the past couple of hours.

"Yes, I did. I said it would only be me and the most essential staff and I couldn't even manage that. I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it, Steve. We will find a way to work this out."

"Listen about things working out. I think you should give Buck a shot. I know you kind of just got out of a long-term relationship but you were willing to date him before he joined the team. I can promise you he is nothing like-"

"Don't say his name," you practically growled.

"Ok sorry but you know who I'm talking about and Bucky isn't like that. So please try and find the peace to give him a chance. Please," Steve pleaded he even gave you puppy dog eyes (or the best he could manage) to go along with it.

"I'll think about it. This would be a big step for me. Besides you heard what Tony said I'm not worth it," your thoughts talking over your rational reasoning for a split second.

"No that's not true Y/n you are worth more than the most beautiful diamond on earth. You are worth more than the stars in the sky. You are worth more than all the more in the world. Because you may have a sordid and terrible past you have changed you have made a difference in this world and that paired with the fact that you are just a kind-hearted and tender soul you are everything. You are worth more than anything anyone could own. You deserve to be happy and if Bucky can give that to you give him a chance please," tears filled your eyes. All you've been able to think about for the last couple of days in the infirmary is how short life is and maybe you should start living your life.

"Ok."

It's okay to restart and recreate. Don't spend time beating yourself up over something that went wrong. There's always another chance. -Anonymous

[mx-barnes]

It's You

(Stronger than All Other Loves/S.A.O.L)

Bucky x Reader

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Word Count: 972

Warnings: mentions of daymares (basically nightmares in the day idk ok), swearing, insecure Bucky kinda, Bucky falling madly in love, I think that’s it I don’t know lmk if I missed anything

A/n:

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Previously on S.A.O.L

Bucky's day was normal until he spotted you. The way your laughter filled him with joy. You were the one person who seemed to make all the bad melt away. The daymares melt away. The constant reminder of all the people he had killed being pushed to the back of his mind. He had just seen you from across the store and you already had him feeling like this what would happen if you were to talk to him. You had elegance in your step. A red-headed woman walked alongside you. She seemed pumped to be shopping while you didn't but that didn't stop you from what looks like spending a lot of money on clothes but maybe those were your friend's bags. As if you had teleported you were there in front of him. Except for this time the bags you once carried were now on the floor.

Even though he had knocked your bags out of your hands you still gave him your number. Not before bugging him about how old his phone is. What can he say old technology just agrees with him better. Maybe that's because he was alive in the 40s. He was one hundred percent a nerd. So he should be good with new technology but he isn't. I guess when you are frozen for 70 years and had your mind fucked with you miss a few things. Pondering to himself he wondered if it would be creepy to text you right now I mean you had just left the store. He decides to do it whether it was creepy or not. He really liked you. Just from talking to you for a minute maybe less. You were strong confident and god you were cute. He could feel the blush coming to his face as he thought about you before he could stop himself he was sending you a text.

Hey this is Bucky

A little bit of time passes but it feels like such a long time he nearly drops his phone when it buzzes.

Hey it's Y/N

His heart skips a beat your name was so gorgeous.

So I finally get to know your name haha

That was stupid of him to say but he did and now he couldn't take it back.

Yeah, guess you do. Sorry, best friend duty calls. Talk soon <3

It seemed logical you were with someone when he bumped into you. Figuring you were busy he let you get back to your "best friend duties". He would just text you later.

Bucky had been wandering the mall for about 2 hours before he called it quits and decided to head home. Bucky had been eager to hear back from you hoping you would text him first. Sadly you never texted so instead he took a leap of faith and texted you first hoping that maybe you wouldn't find him annoying and completely shut him out of your life. To his surprise, it went well and he manages to get you to agree to get to know each other a little better.

You had seemed like a great person. You were kind, cute, most of all you didn't care that he used a flip phone. Sure you made that small quip about how old it was but you didn't seem to mind his old fashion approach to phones. He found it weird that someone could actually touch the screen of the phone and it reacts. I mean even the last Stark Expo he attended with the flying car freaked him out just a little bit. He marveled at the days when the strangest that science ever created was Steve and himself.

His buzzing phone pulled him out of his little daydream. The screen read

Do you want to call since it might be easier than having to type on that ancient phone haha <3

He knew from this moment he was hooked. He couldn't possibly find someone else. He didn't even know if you were single. You had to be or why else would you give him your number. Realizing he had been staring at the text too long he types out a quick Ok and sends it.

A minute or so later his flip phoned buzzed on a continuous loop like it did when Steve was calling him. Almost immediately he picked it up. Cursing himself at how fast he did.

"Hey," your soft voice on the other side of the line made Bucky's heart melt.

"Hey," he responded softly as well.

"So-" you spoke

"How-" his voice clashing with yours

"You first," you and he says in sync. He loved your voice and wished he could record it to hear it forever.

"Ok, I'll go first. So what did you all get from the Garage?" your voice tender and caring. Maybe he was just dreaming this up could it be possible that you wanted to talk to him his anxiety started to take hold of his thoughts.

"Well, I didn't actually get much besides a number I didn't really get anything else there was nothing of interest. What about you? Your hands seemed full when I bumped into you."

"Well I got a couple of decent shirts and some jeans I debated getting a leather jacket but wasn't sure if it would look good on me." you chuckle. Bucky imagines you dressed up in a leather jacket actually one particular one his.

"I think you would look absolutely stunning in one."

The conversation drags on for hours and Bucky welcomingly accepts the fact that he is going to either upgrade his phone or his plan because you were going to be one expensive call. Not that it wasn't one he wouldn't mind paying but an expensive one nonetheless.

You always gain by giving love - Reese Witherspoon

[mx-barnes]

Drowning

(Stronger than All Other Loves/S.A.O.L)

Bucky x Reader

Summary: Maybe not everyone is cut out for love. You have had a pretty shitty life. First, you are “gifted” to Hydra by the asshole you had been calling mom and dad for nearly 12 years. Then you get turned into one deadly assassin which put Steve Rogers newly made captain of the Howling Commando’s on your trail and when he finally finds you his government then put you on ice for 70 years plus. After that, you have a stint with Tony Stark the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist which leaves you heartbroken and unwilling to try love again until you bump into Bucky Barnes. Will you be able to let him in or will you try and stop this too?

Word Count: 1.2k

Warnings: mentions of suicide/death, almost drowning to death, heartbreak, mentions of HYDRA, neglectful parents, HYDRA using reader as a weapon, Steve being sent to capture reader and bring them to the government, reader being put on ice, Swearing, Tony kinda being an ass I guess, mentions of reader past relationship with Tony

A/n: Ok so this is a story I started writing on my Wattpad and I decided to transfer it over here too. This is just going to be a short short miniseries. Everything is planned (wow I actually planned something for once). If this series goes over well I have an idea for a prequel where it is Stucky x reader. I don't want to put time into it if you guys don't like this one. Likes and reblog welcome. Also I am working on pt. 2 for Time will Tell.

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Dying is a natural part of life. Whether it be accidental, old age, murder, or suicide, it is normal. Death is something we must all face. Some people face it every day. Every day when their soul is crushed and killed. Suppressing the feelings that they feel for someone because they can't truly express them.

A jolt upwards and a shout, "Y/N!" sending water sputtering out your lungs.

The crushing pain you once felt in your chest is gone. Not entirely, but mostly. The heartache that was there before is still there, but the pressure around your body has lifted. Making it easier to breathe.

"What's up?" smiling softly you look up into the eyes of the person who has just pulled you from the lake. The greenish-blue eyes looking down at you. The dirty blonde hair falling against his forehead is soaking wet. A suppressed smile emerges onto his face.

"Well you just about died-"

"Steve I didn't almost die your overreacting I'm fine." Bouncing a yellow orb of energy across your fingers you sit up. "See completely fine," you say as it flickers out.

"You almost drown Y/n. You are most certainly not fine. I'm taking you to see Bruce."

"Steveeeeeeeeeee-"

"No arguments."

Steve was overprotective, to say the least. You never understood why. He was never like this with the others. He cared about you obviously but it seemed fickle to think it was anything other than him not wanting to lose his best friend at least that's what he told you. He was a simple and kind man you saw no reason not to trust his word. He cared for you everyone bugged you but it didn't seem to bother you much. He was a great friend everyone else thought there was something more going on with you two, but it didn't matter he was a good friend. You wouldn't want to screw up a perfectly good friendship. You always seemed to fuck everything up.

Steve was the one who set you up with this job. Your parents had started noticing some silly little thing you did when you were younger (it was the 40s not many enhanced humans were around). Yellow spirals floating around your head small jolts of energy. They started really noticing it when you turned 12. That was when they shipped you off to HYDRA. You were poked and prodded at for about 2 years before Dr. Zola decided to weaponize you. So began the training. The training you had endured made it almost impossible for you to feel. At age 18 Captain America or Steve Rogers was sent on a solo mission to find you. For 5 years you evaded capture. When Steve finally found you he somehow saw a tenderness in your eyes that you let seep through. So despite everyone wanting to execute you, Steve petitioned for you to be put on ice. So you were put under. At age 25 you were stashed away and hidden. So no one would ever find you.

Nearly 70 years later you were found. Steve had been found 4 years earlier and started the search to find you. It took everything he had but he had finally found you in a remote location underground in Osborne, Kansas. Bruce had helped to nurse you back to what seemed to be normal for the first year but soon you and Tony began casually flirting it grew into casual dating till you two had been going out for nearly 2 years. As if Tony had gotten bored he broke it off with you. You had fallen pretty hard so it was heart-crushing when he broke it off with you.

"Y/n. Y/n you there? Hello Y/n." Bruce's voice cut through all thoughts of Tony and the pain he put you through.

"Sorry Bruce, what was that?" Holding back the tears that wanted to spill.

"We need to run some test on why the water affected your powers."

"I'm fine I don't need them. It probably has something to do with the fact that I almost drowned. I'll be fine. Look see my powers are back I just needed some rest." Producing a yellow orb of energy and passing it off to Bruce you hop off the table and head towards your room before he can say anything. You feel bad for giving him the cold shoulder but you weren't really in the mood to be poked and prodded with needles once again in your overextended life.

You walk into your room and close the door behind you. Flopping down on your bed you hear a knock at the door. "Y/n you in?" a familiar voice asks. That voice still fills you with comfort but it also tears you apart. Your hearts jumped at the chance to hear him say your name once again. Now there he was on the other side of the door waiting for you to open it. "Y/n come on we need to talk. We can't be distracted on missions and I want us to at least still be able to work together."

Getting up you wipe the tears from your eyes. You don't even remember when you let the tears slip but there you were wiping the tears away. Checking in the mirror beside your door you see if you are even a little presentable before you open the door. You are so you open it. Tony looking down at you with a sad smile on his face. "What do you want Stark?" there was an edge there clearly meaning don't bother you. You're not in the mood but as normal he didn't read the cue.

"Listen, you were distracted this mission, what's up?"

Shocked you look back at him. Wanting to slam the door in his face but you resisted. "What's up? What's up Tony? What about the fact that you broke up with me!" yelling now you continue "You broke up with me Tony. We dated for almost two years and all of a sudden no warning whatsoever we break up. What did I do to make you unhappy? You know what don't answer that. I don't want to know. You don't deserve a second more of my time. So yeah we're cool. I am sorry I fucked up on the mission. Did you even remember it would've been our second anniversary today? I bet you didn't because I always had to remind you. So I am sorry for being distracted and I'm sorry that I almost died today. That's on me. It's on me for falling for you. It's on me that I love you. It's on me that I haven't moved on yet so just leave me the hell alone." You slammed the door in his face before he can get a word out.

Turning around and placing your back to the door you sink to the floor and sob. You know the entire tower probably heard your freak out but you didn't care. Everyone was convinced you two would get back together but it was officially over there was no hope for you two. Maybe that was ok you could grieve the loss of him and find someone new someone better.

Not all storms come to disrupt your life, some come to clear your path. -Anonymous