#Rotten boroughs and albion

[terrebus-fc]

FA SUNDAY LEAGUE CUP — ROUND 3

FULL TIME

TERREBUS FC 2-1 ROTTEN BOROUGHS AND ALBION (Le Vesconte '77, Irving '84)

It was a tough visit to Dunny-on-the-Wold for the third round, with Rotten Boroughs and Albion the shoo-in candidates for the win – only to concede defeat to Terrebus, for whom this will be a vote of confidence in the march to the cup final.

Albion took the lead early in the sixth minute, when captain "Old" Sarum forced the ball in off Bridgens, and for a moment it seemed as if they would hold on to their seats; their formidable centre-backs, distinguishable by age if not name, kept Fitzjames in their pocket for much of the first half. The boys' chances were further diminished by Albion's assembled representations to the officials to ensure the majority of decisions went their way.

Other than that, the action was as stale as a chamber of landed gentry debating topics to which they did not relate. Attention therefore swivelled to the George Back benches, money having exchanged hands for the sponsorship of every piece of equipment in the AirB&B Arena. Readers may be interested in some notes of gossip, particularly Goodsir mentioning a wedding invitation moments before Gibson was spotted with a new ring on his finger. Meanwhile, the injured Bobert Peel and "Waterloo" Wellington were explaining their new plan to sell the rights to the home stand on a rotational basis, the This End franchisement scheme, to the crowd.

Tozer attempted a shot on goal just before half time, but Wilberforce tipped his shot over the bar and it clipped Heather's feet instead.

When next the teams walked out, it was more of the same – the referee, W. Pitt, no relation to either of Albion's centre-backs, refused to be privy to any of Albion's cheating. Once again the stands were all the more interesting, now for an artist, WP, who was painting scenes from Greek mythology.

At approximately 6.32PM, however, and just as all thought Albion would be holding on to their seats, the leaders seemed to suffer a complete collapse. Manager Earl T. Grey elected to abolish his 4-4-2, and the reformed 5-3-2 soon lost all sense of self. WP's draft of the Medusa was quickly forgotten as Terrebus raced forward, Le Vesconte toeing it in at close range.

A replay seemed on the cards but for Irving, who thundered a shot into Wilberforce's goal from fifteen yards. "God grants us many things in this world, and he does grant us goals," he explained later, graciously.

With the win, Terrebus supporters will all be looking forward to those days of May and the final, while Albion might need to consider its own overhaul. One steward at least, a Will P., was overheard lamenting how his suggestions to refine (though not defund nor abolish) the playing system had been shot down.

Home attendance figures were eleven, all of whom are not resident to Dunny-in-the-Wold.

Vote for your Man of the Match here!

[terrebus-fc]

As one fan so eloquently put it, "God granted you the goal and he granted you that ass." John Irving, who netted 47.4% of the vote, is your Man of the Match against Rotten Boroughs and Albion!

Second place went to Solomon Tozer, closely followed by Henry Le Vesconte. You can view all responses here.

[terrebus-fc]

Matchday 11

FULL TIME

TERREBUS FC 3-1 HARDTACK ROVERS (Hodgson 42’, Irving 68’, Le Vesconte ‘85)

Having cut their teeth against Victorian City the Ship’s Boys cracked on against Hardtack Rovers, and this time it was our opponents who had to suffer the bitter taste of defeat. Two goals in the second half from our jammie dodgers were enough to cancel out Rovers’ early goal and the result, needless to say, takes a large bite out of Nunavut’s lead at the top.

All eyes were on Francis Crozier this match, as he currently sits at four yellow cards for the season and a fifth would result in suspension for at least three matches. However, our hard-tackling captain remained on his best behaviour for the full ninety minutes, although he came close to losing his temper at a wasteful Fitzjames pass that resulted in the visitors’ first and only goal. Rovers pounced on Terrebus’s momentary lapse in attention with a rarely-seen hunger. A cross from captain George Ledwell Taylor found midfielder Thomas Tassell Grant in the box, and while Bridgens got a hand on the ball, he will surely find his fumble a hard one to digest. 

It was not to be a battering, however. Grant was once more in the mix minutes later as Terrebus’s own George Hodgson found himself stranded in enemy territory with the ball at his feet. Faced with losing possession or going one-on-one with Rovers’ salty number 6, Hodgson opted for the lesser of two weevils. Fortunately for Terrebus, our doughty midfielder managed to brush aside Grant’s half-baked attempt to stop him and hit his mark with aplomb. This was Hodgson’s second goal of the season and the lad will certainly be hungry for more.

The visitors made a valiant effort in the second half as Taylor hit the crossbar twice, but a neat header from John Irving took the biscuit and the Rovers defence crumbled shortly thereafter. But our lads still had an appetite for goals, and Henry Le Vesconte finally made it three shortly before the bell rang for supper. 

The win moves Terrebus up into the dizzying heights of 10th place. Terrebus next face Rotten Boroughs & Albion in the next step to the FA Sunday League Cup final—a match that all of our fans will surely elect to watch.

Help us choose our new Man of the Match trophy! Vote for your favorite here.